#i’m nervyyy

[elliesdoll]

idk why i keep thinking abt angsty loser!ellie… she is my baby

nsfw! just ellie masturbating n crying (me) 𝜗𝜚

pts 2 & 3 already posted!

a wonderful anon said my fic reminded them of this song and they r so right… listen to it rn

daily click! do not buy tlou free palestine 🇵🇸

ellie was so in love with you. she is so in love with you.

you are her light. your smile, your laugh, your everything. she just couldn’t get enough of you. being friends with you was probably the best blessing god could ever gift her, yet also the worst punishment.

she knew she could never have you.

not in the way she wanted, anyway.

you talk ellie’s ear off almost everyday, and ellie never gets tired of it. your sweet voice that felt like pure honey and warmth being poured into her ears. so sickly sweet. she swore you were a siren of some sort.

you were so perfect and you didn’t even know it. you would tell ellie about your escapades and little ‘situationships’ as you’d like to call it, and it made her sick. every last person you talked about seemed like shit. she couldn’t believe that you thought that’s all you were worthy of.

she would worship you if you gave her the chance.

she told you the same thing each time: “fuck them. you know you’re too pretty for them anyway.”

and you were always grateful for her. who else would remind you of your worth? you needed her, she was your rock. your fidgety, awkwardly nerdy rock.

she was always the shy type. or she was around you, at least. she was never too bashful, but sometimes she’d slip and show you just how nervous you make her. her freckled skin would turn all pink, her eyes avoiding your gaze. she’d have an awkward, thin-lipped smile, and you could feel the clamminess of her hands if she was touching you. you’d find it cute, how she’d just melt if you two were touching or you’d give her a compliment on literally anything.

but what you didn’t know, is how she hated herself for it.

after anytime you two hung out, she’d go home, stomping to her room and looking down at her feet. “so fucking stupid.” she’d mutter to herself, thinking of all the times she stuttered around you or got all warm in the face. but without fail, each little mishap would lead to her in her bed, a string of curses leaving her mouth while pathetically fingering herself to the thought of you.

one particular night, she had shown up to your house unannounced. knocking at your door, leaning back on her heels as she waited for you to open up.

she doesn’t normally do this. she never does this. but she thought maybe you two had gotten close enough. just enough for her to show up at your home anytime she felt like seeing you.

so when you opened the door, and she saw your hair a bit disheveled, your cheeks flushed and what appeared to be a hickey below your jaw, that thought quickly went away.

“fuck, els. i’m sorry but… really bad timing.”

you said with a light chuckle, giving her an apologetic smile. she just stared at you, eyes wide and her cheeks red.

“fuck. i’m sorry, shit. i don’t know why i showed up here— i wasn’t thinking. sorry.”

she mutters, stuttering over her words. she hated how her tummy got all fuzzy and how her boxers suddenly felt all warm and soaked. all while having the biggest lump in her throat.

before you could say anything back, she was already speed walking away from your front door, down to her car. she got in and drove away, not even bothering to see if you were still there, watching her.

she felt so fucking stupid. her vision was blurry as she drove home, speeding until she finally parked in her driveway. who the fuck was in your house? which one was it fucking you? did they even love you like she did? she wanted to crawl into a hole and die.

she swung the door open, then slammed it behind her as she ran to her room. she closed the door and locked in, and let the tears flow. she kicked her beat up converse off, and aggressively rubbed her cheeks to get rid of the wet tears that rolled down them.

“fucking idiot.”

“why the fuck would i?— god.”

“what did i think? she doesn’t love me.”

she mumbles to herself, all through hiccups and stuttered breaths. her pretty cheeks are wet with hot tears, her eyes red and watery. even her poor nose is all stuffed up, making her sound nasally as she dumbly insults herself.

one by one, she removes her clothes. she fiddles with the button of her jeans and undoes it, hooking her thumbs under the band of her boxers at the same time, and kicks it all off. she then moves to her hoodie, messily taking it off and cursing when it gets stuck on her little bun. she even takes her sports bra off, which she never does.

fully naked and vulnerable, she turns all the lights off and crawls into bed.

she sobs into her pillow, feeling like some pathetic idiot. she doesn’t know why she ever thought you’d feel for her the way she feels for you. she felt so fucking perverted too— getting wet over the idea of you getting fucked. getting wet over your smile, your touch.

she sniffles, her slender hand slithering down to her pussy. she sighs as her middle finger lightly swipes by her clit, feeling just how wet she is. she brings her ring finger into the mix and circles her clit, gathering all the wetness from her clenching hole.

she moans, quietly. ellie isn’t typically a moaner, but she is right now. she is for you. she rubs her clit rapidly, the sounds of her squelching pussy filling her dark room. she closes her eyes, not wanting to cum too quick. she stars to think about you, and her fingers go to plug her hole.

she imagines you below her, giving her that sweet smile as she made love to you. she wanted to love you so bad, it hurt.

“oh god— shit,” she whined to herself, legs spread and feet planted on her bed, knees bent as she mercilessly fucked herself to the thought of you. she wanted to make you cum by her fingers, mouth, cunt— whatever the fuck you wanted.

her imagination switched to your mouth on her pussy, lapping at her clit and eating her out like you’d die if you didn’t. she let out a shaky whine, imagining that her fingers were your tongue, moving in and out of her as your nose nudged her clit.

ellie’s breath sped up, her eyebrows knitted upwards as she felt that hot, sticky feeling in her belly just come flooding out. her cunt pushed out and clenched around her fingers, as she cums with a strangled cry. her body covered in a thin layer of sweat, and her thighs trembling as her slick came gushing out of her, staining her sheets below her.

she slowly pulled her fingers out, catching her breath. she could feel her heart in her ears. but the ache never left. she’s still crying, just not as theatrically. she doesn’t even bother cleaning herself up or her bed, just turning to the side and hugging her pillow. she shoves her face into the plush pillow, her wet face dampening the fabric. and there, cum sticking her thighs and pussy together, naked, she fell asleep.

and she’ll never move on, either. you haunt her, even in her dreams. doomed to love you in every reality.

aaakkk i dunno how to end these 😖 this is my first fic(?) drabble thingy ever so pls be gentle haha lol ☺️☺️☺️👍

this is so rushed bai 😑

[pollenallergie]

discussions of weight and diet stuff below the cut. read at your own discretion.

so i have my first appointments with the bariatric clinic today and i am nervyyy. on the one hand, i feel like i’m using a resource that i maybe don’t need and taking it from someone else because i’m only like 235 lbs and not like 600+ lbs. so i feel kinda like a fraud?? but on the other hand, i know that i’ve got really bad disordered eating and that no one ever taught me enough about cooking and proper nutrition to know how to make meals for myself that are healthy and that won’t mess with my sensory issues and that i’ll actually enjoy the taste of.

lots of conflicting emotions, besties.

i know i need to get this ish under control BEFORE it becomes a problem, but also like… in my experience the healthcare industry has never been truly set up for preventative care??? like it just doesn’t want to shell out the resources to prevent things from getting bad, it’d rather just focus on treating things once they’ve already gotten bad… and i’m nervous that that’s going to be the case again and either a) my insurance won’t cover it or b) they won’t take me on as a patient so i’ll just be stuck trying to figure this all out on my own.

i’m also really scared to hear all the shit that i’ve been doing wrong. like i know i’ve not been taking care of myself like i should be, but i’m scared to hear the exact details of what i’ve been doing wrong because i’m very self-critical and that could… not go over well, to say the least.

also i have so much calculus shit to do??? and i have like three back-to-back appointments with this clinic today??? and like dnsnsnsnsnbdd this is not the day for that!! i have too much coursework to do!!! i need to focus on coursework!!!

[elsweetheart]

That hybrid! fic i like the event of the century, I'm so excited !! 🩷

oh gosh i’m nervyyy 💗

[intrepidacious]

oop I’m sorry meaning it’s angsty and gonna make me cry? 😦

as much as I love the angst I’m nervyyy; I am in need of a good cry tho

<333

i never cry writing anything and i sobbed my eyes out writing this so. i hope it'll be a rejuvenating cry <3

[euaphoric]

saurrr, i’m working on a 80’s punk rocker!jk fic and i’m going 2 post the teaser for it later td !! it’s gonna be well over 10k+ words so it’s much longer than ANYTHING i’ve ever written before but i’ve had this idea for mad long that i may as well finally write about it skskksdjd, i hope ppl read it >.< omg im so nervyyy

[mattspoetdepartment]

Hanging out with work friends after work and I’m NERVYYY

[c4nonball]

I’m nervyyy

[dreambaited]

i’m nervyyy

[girlrry]

im nervyyy see you after 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻 or maybe during 🫶🏻🫶🏻🧃🫶🏻

tummy hurt more bc i’m nervy

[miladysatsuki]

guys I start my new job tomorrow which is coincidentally also my dream job lol I’m nervyyy 🤧

[hesitationss]

i joined a toisan diaspora discord server over a year ago and completely ghosted it like i still want to learn and get better but now i’m anxious about it. the mods seem super nice and welcoming i’m just nervyyy hi co la or whatever

[sleepingathlete]

So I did a thing....

I’m super nervyyy about people watching it and you’ll see why in the video. Please be kind and go watch it, I would be super appreciative. ty xx

[st4rg1r111]

I’m going back to the gym tomorrow after a month and a halfish break and idk why but I’m so nervyyy 🙈😩😖