#i'll try to try again next year and see~
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Doodle Dump
Been a while since I've posted a collection of bad sketches. Notes under the cut~
1-2) AC:OS Seals. So, I didn't want to give up on making those seals for you guys even though my enthusiasm for it kinda went away~ The melon soda seal feels like it's missing something, and I think the sea captain seal is giving too much Admiral Bobbery for its own good, so I might redo that one entirely. I don't hate them, but somehow they're not reading as very "Animal Crossing" to me. I think I need to get more creative about the facial features.
3) Pudding. Another attempt of designing Yuru's main mask. I think it's cute, but I'm still not sold on it. I like the colors at least, but I think I want the mask to have a big gaping mouth so he doesn't need to take it off to eat. I'm just having a hard time keeping it cute when the mouth is open.
I dunno if Pudding is gonna be their final name, but I guess it suits them.
4) Kun3h0 ver. 4(?). I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, but I just can't stop trying to redesign Kun3h0. Lately, I've been thinking that I'd like to try and make her a little less symmetrical for more visual interest. Originally the change was as simple as just adding the gauntlet to one arm (similar to be VERY early iterations of my "vtuber sona" with their one-paw glove), but then I started changing her more, and ended up with this. It's cute, but somehow I think it makes her theming even less apparent XP (her tummy lines were doing A LOT to sell the fact that she's a robot and not someone just dressed in sci-fi-ish gear).
I changed her eye color to green to draw in focus to her face (which is important for a V-Tuber design). Originally I thought I was achieving that by making the hair so much darker than everything else, thus drawing attention to the head, but I think changing the eye color to something unique helps even more with directing your eyes straight to the face.
I dunno. I like it aesthetically, but I feel like I'm losing the story here. In the last design, even though it was kinda generic, just having the clear indicator that she was inhuman did a lot to inform her character, but when I lose that, I lose the one real point of interest she had.
Then again, I've never truly had a good grasp on Kun3h0 as a character, so maybe that's what's wrong. Maybe if I sit down and actually write even a basic backstory for her, then I'd have some more direction besides, "girly robot Y2K inspired game character with a heart/bunny motif".
5-6) P2 Kliff (Banana Split/Original). So, I wanted to make a version of Kliff that fits more into my aesthetics. (Read: I wanted to make him pink). It isn't meant to be a replacement for him, just an alternate palette. In fact, I kinda liked this outfit enough to try it in his original colors too, and I think it works~
However, I dunno if I completely like the Banana Split colors
The outfit is based on this sketch from Kliff's original concept drawings.
I have NO idea what's going on in his chest area. They can't be the buttons on the top because he's wearing a turtleneck (unless it's a vest, and he's seriously wearing 3 layers in this fit). I don't think it's a lanyard because he already has a name tag on his shirt.
So I interpreted it as a necklace. I dunno, I've always felt like one of Kliff's understated traits is that he's clearly fashion conscious given how much he accessorizes and that he has the confidence to even run around in a coat that yellow, so I don't think it's out of the question that he'd wear more jewelry.
#gbunny draws#animal crossing: open seas#seals#OCs#kun3h0#yuru#nsr#kliff#tbh. i think i felt more inspired to draw after art fight ended.#since i don't feel obliged to it anymore#maybe i wouldn't have had fun even i did get to participate as much as i thought i wanted to#who knows#i'll try to try again next year and see~
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the very first words out of shih-na's mouth to lang after admitting to being a spy and a murderer are flirting with him. you really have to respect a girlie who shoots her shot even in her darkest hour
#langna#shih-na#shi-long lang#aai spoilers#guess i'll try to spoiler tag more what with the collection coming out soon#jokes aside i truly am losing my mind over how quickly she rushes to say this completely unprompted when she gains nothing from it#she could have just been like haha you're so stupid for trusting me or taunted him about everything she got away with right under his nose#unfortunate that after this scene like Nobody ever explores their feelings about shih-na ever again and then in aai2 lang is just like. Fin#but it's fine. aai3 will come out on the swithc 2 next year (pointing emoji) and we will see soooo many complex motives
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Hi there, I'm very sorry if you've answered this before, and feel free to ignore this if it feels pushy or stresses you out, but do you think you would ever continue writing Panthera? It's one of my comfort fics that I come back to regularly and I would love to know if there is ever a possibility of it continuing. If not, just know that a number of your fics hold a very special place in my heart and were some of my first ever forays into fandom in general.
lots of love
i would continue writing it, but i don't know if i WILL if you know what i mean? like i like it but i'm stuck on it and have been since 2017 when i last updated it and i'm pretty time poor, but i also started tumbling in 2017 and just updated that after like two years so honestly...no one knows what i will do, least of all me
glad you love it tho! i also have warm fuzzies for it tbh
#i'm just out here#my fic#panthera#i'll read it and see if anything comes to me and if doesn't i'll try again next year or something
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countdown to binnie’s bday
↳ d-2: changbin x star wars
#stray kids#changbin#seochangbinet#createskz#bystay#staysource#jypartists#malegroupsnet#seo changbin#stray kids edits#stray kids changbin#skz#my.edits#changbinbday2023#i have an unhealthy obsession with star wars so this was a v fun project for me!!!#was gonna do a shinee x bin edit but some of them were awful so maybe i'll try again next year#also if ur an absolute fucxing nerd like me and can read aurabesh . there's some fun lil tidbits!#had to give him a pink lightsaber but i can also see him with blue!!!#was torn between placing him on nar shadaa corellia or ord mantel but nar shadaa is my fav so !#it's like a space las vegas what isn't there to love#also i handmade the lightsaber beam so ! v proud of myself it took forever to get just right
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ily, every work of yours brings me catharsis <3 enjoy your break!
🫂 I love you too anon!! thank you for being here
#trying my best to relax but work is still crazy busy lol#guys you're supposed to have your spending done by now... pls...#but this weekend and new years will definitely be a lot more relaxing#I'm drafting my next fic in my downtime and I'll be working on it soon!!#might do some smaller drabbles beforehand to warm up again but we'll see#ask mags
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Hm.... Do you hear something?
Look at the details I put into this thang
#zero escape#zero escape spoilers#999 spoilers#blood cw#clover 999#clover field#I am not immune to making fanart for the axe ending#9 hours 9 persons 9 doors#I'll be yelled at for this one aren't I welp! I'd like to issue an apology by promising wholesome field sibling content in the coming days#and that WILL happen because you see I want this on ig but I#I cannot have this there without a spoiler buffer qwq#my art#I was dying to use this pallette for clover since I stumbled into it during last year's 999 week so I made it sad!#and bloody!!#also this is going to be a color palette trickle down effect also because in trying to make this brighter (task failed)#I got a new idea >:3#final note on this someone bonk me next time I have to draw the inside of this ship so I don't get lazy and use a screenshot again it's. hm#the third time I think
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many thoughts, many thoughts…
#hmm... this isn't really my place to speak—i'm not apart of the flower patch—but i have a lot of thoughts on my mind about you.#firstly I'm glad they found someone as important to them as Alli is to me (and the rest of the system of course)!#they deserve someone that important. they really really do.#and second—on the subject of labels—did you know that some of them call this a situationship?#i think that's funny personally. none of us see this relationship as romantic or anything similar‚ for the record.#but some of them do label it as such‚ mainly in a silly/joking way. they don't seriously think of it as such#i guess we should come up with our own word for it. hmm...#you're our knight. i suppose that makes us your ward? we're certainly not royalty… tho if u wanna call us ur prince we wouldn't mind /silly#labels simultaneously do and don't matter to us as you can tell. but we're not gonna run ourselves ragged trying to put a word to this#this… whatever it is. an expanse. an ocean of amazement. hmm...#it's like getting a glimpse at a galaxy—you can't see much but what you do see is truly beautiful. does that make sense?#what they feel for you is immaculate and all-consuming. is immaculate even the right word? thought disorder be damned i hate words.#anyways! it's… a lot‚ as you know. they really do lov you more than words can describe.#and lord. we haven't felt this since we met Alli. we really really haven't.#we can't put into words what she means to us either. even after all these years…#but anyways. ine of the brightest stars in our constellation‚ one of the most vivid and perfect colours in our mind#one of the best and beautiful notes in our favourite song‚ so on so forth.#many ways to put it. our desrest knight‚ you mean so much to us. but I'm sure you know that already! <2 <3#alrighty. back to sleep. had to get this off my mind before i forgot in the morning#I do hope you'll stick around. lord knows the next time I'll be here again. would love to see you again should i go dormant anytime soon.#–Amour
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so i took my car in today because i thought it might just need some more brake fluid and although i tried to just look at it myself i couldn't for the life of me figure out which part under the hood was the brake fluid reservoir without having to lean all over my car and get all dirty, so i figured i might just have to pay a service fee and whatever for the fluid itself...
turns out i need all new brake pads !!
ahaha
haha
ha
yay
#i swear to god it's like my car knows whenever it's tax time#like 'hey can i have some money pwease? pweaaaaase just a thousand dollars for new brakes pretty pwease?!'#i guess!!!!!!#i kinda need 'em#jokes on you though because i haven't even filed my taxes yet#i'm gonna have to wait until next week when i get paid but they said i should be able to drive on them for maybe another month as they are#i had other stuff i was gonna do today but given the circumstances i decided to just park my ass back at home#mostly i've been trying to do some ~research of the local libraries to prepare for school which is starting....soon#but i'll just have to postpone my research for the time being#it's funny too because i was watching a tiktok the other day of 'what to do if your breaks fail'#i even almost scrolled past it but something told me to go back and watch#and now i guess i know why#fortunately i haven't had to use that information just yet#but dear god today whenever i put on the breaks it sounds like thunder#just a terrible sound for a car to make#prior to that all that happened was my break light kept coming on whenever i accelerated#it would go off once i'd been rolling for a little bit or sometimes if i'd ease off the gas and then accelerate again#and when i tried to research it myself that's where i got the break fluid thing from#really hoped it was going to be that simple but it never is!!#that's just the rules!!#so anyway that's how my weekend's starting off#not great tbh but it could be a lot worse so i'm just gonna be grateful this is something i can fix#(even if i really don't want to)#and just move on with it and hope nothing else tears up on this goddamn car#because it wasn't that long ago i had to take it in for something else so....#if i could go like....mmm a year maybe before i need any more expensive ass repairs i'd really appreciate it#tires i'm looking you straight in the eye don't you even think about it#i did have my follow up with my urologist today also and they did another x-ray#she said she doesn't see the stone anymore so i believe it did in fact pass so that's some good news !!#we're just gonna keep an eye on the one that's on the other side and still in my kidney
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alright~ a few updates about everything! so this weekend I'll be seeing changkyun in chicago- so I prolly won't be posting until after I'm alive again from that 😂😅 (I am vv excited about it- I just know I'll be vv tired when I return home). Anyways, I have a few fics in the works~ one of them that is a request 🤭 I'm vv excited to work on them! But I think I'm going to change my masterlist a bit when I come back. I'm going to retire a few groups from the main masterlist and I've been debating for the past year about it... But I think I'm going to add a yearly masterlist- So it would go from most recent to the beginning of this year~
I'm also thinking about changing my pfp- I haven't been really into stray kids for uh... years- But I will be sure to make an update about that if I go thru with that too- (It may be ji changmin next 🫣🤭)
Anyways those are my few updates 🥰💖
#in general my brain is so muddled outside of talking to my three closest and my mom i'm just... fogged- but god how i want to be#writing rn- i have 4 smuts and 1 fluff in the works (who would have guessed my fluff writer self has moved from not only plain fluff to#angst & smut this year? not me- but i'm happy about it) two are poly aus and the other two are about a certain 🌙~#kate rambles on from here#altho there is another vv big potential fic~ but i'm only counting ones i have lots of progress on-#and then the masterlist thing i've been thinking about forever- hwvr again i do not know if i'll have the energy bc i might be knocked#on my ass for another month after this trip (i'll be pretty much solely driving for 4 & 1/2 hrs there and another 4 & 1/2 back the next day#but the pfp thing has been on my mind for a while too- again idk when i'll get around to it but jinkoh has given me a vv good#idea esp for winter~ with mr. ji~ so i'm sure to have changed it by december~ (unless the change is too much for me- i haven't changed it#since 2018... so i'm kind of attached to it- even tho i don't even bias him or stan the group anymore...)#anyways this is full of me rambling- i could really go on tbh- bc i'm really trying to get my mind into gear- but these are my updates#let's see if i fulfill em- i'm bound to fill the fic ones- but the other two... yeah- we'll see-#kate rambles#blog updates#should i bring babydoll q & juyo to the concert bc if it wasn't for kyun getting me into dominic fike(and being into tbz during stealer era#i wouldn't have been a tbz ult... (outside of some other factors i haven't really disclosed) bc atp i'm vv close to packing them with me#i mean tbh a tbz pc was going- but now i'm 🫣: should i bring them to see the guy from my first ult group that caused the spiral-#that made me get into my newest ult group? (i love this butterfly effect more than i could ever express tbh- even tho i express it often)#anyways if someone actually reads these- i'm bound to bring babydoll q- legally that's my buddy- but juyo?? 👀
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i wish i could just do nothing for a few days straight. maybe even just sleep for a few days straight. sooo excited for constant misery over the next 20 days
ranting in the tags. i would just scroll past if i were you
#i love college.my favorite part is sitting alone on my couch for 4 months straight and getting so freaked out over grades i spend#5 hours straight trying to avoid the urge to bite into my arm so hard i bruise or bash my head into a wall#meanwhile i keep thinking my life is over. i don't have any evidence. for the first time in my life the future isn't predetermined by#other people and now that i don't know what comes next i just constantly get freaked out. it makes me want to claw through my skin#i know something is wrong with me. it's been 5 years. i know it isn't just going to go away; especially given current circumstances#and how it's only been getting worse over time#but i continue to just sit on my couch and do nothing about it. and since i'm not doing anything about it i just feel like i don't have the#right to complain about it even though shit fucking sucks. months of my life at a time just blur together#god. i was genuinely happy last month when i ripped a bunch of booster packs with my mates that i only see over the summer (minus my bestie#and it made me realize just how much everything's blurred together. i hadn't really felt anything lasting + significantly positive#for months before that. that's not normal#god. i've been wanting to go to bed for the last two hours but i just keep sitting here going “um! you need to study. and wash dishes. and”#so i just. don't. which is already bad but i also need to get up early so i can study for my test tomorrow.#god. fucking dreading my lab tomorrow. went to it last week but dipped at the last minute without getting my work checked off#and without submitting it because i got so angry and freaked out and telling myself “man you can just leave” calmed me down instantly#and then at that point i had like nothing done and i didn't want to admit that so i just. left#if i get asked about it i'll just say it was something personal and i panicked. shrug#a part of me is beyond tempted to skip the lab again but i'm not confident in my assignment grades in that class to do so#even though i'll end up with a 5 point bonus on the final grade from taking a survey. but i'll probably go just cause#it's the second to last lab#man i have three whole ass projects due in that class in 10 days. unless my mental state suddenly improves (it won't) i'm gonna end up doin#those the last possible three days#speaking of assignments. we had to do a group project in my bio lab yeah? the methods my group went with sucked and honestly these#people were a little bit frustrating (i get it. gen ed lab at 7:30am. i'm only in it cause i panicked when a different class registration#fell through) since it always felt like they were more interested in getting done than having like. slightly decent work but whatever#but these people? these people asked me to write the conclusion for our presentation. i ask “yeah sure yeah. what did we conclude”#“eh. you can write whatever” ???????????????? HUH???? MATE THAT IS HALF OF THE WORK???????????????????#the shitty sensors and our shitty methods gave us shitty data and YOU PEOPLE CAN'T EVEN SUGGEST WHAT THE CONCLUSION IS????????? fuck me dud#i was already in a poor mood (normal mental illness plus i had found out my uncle died like three days before#like i had talked to him just last month. never had someone i know die before. sucks) but that shit pissed me off
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work pissing me the fuck offfff bro
#for the sake of brevity my day was going to be leave home in my car at 9:30. start 10:00. stay with them as social support for 3 hours.#maybe have some lunch with them or right after depending. drive 20 or so minutes to pick someone up at 2:00#technically it is rostered as 2:30 but they usually finish earlier lately. drive them home which takes around 25 mins. then drive another 20#to do a clean at 3ish for roughly an hr to 1.5 hrs. then drive home for 20-30 minutes. that was going to be my day#these fuckwits decide at 9:25 to message me that there is a roster change. I now have to go somewhere inbetween 1:00 and 2:30 for an hour#long clean. which is also 20 minutes away from my first client. then drive another 20 or even 30 minutes to pick the person up. followed#by the next person. I call them to say hey can you at least tell the transport client because they might be waiting an extra hour than they#expect to. this person is 91 years old by the way. they say oh yeah I will text them. I say could you try call to let them know? they say#the same thing again. on top of this it's just super fucking annoying#I'm also meant to have an hour lunch break as per my roster agreement. tell me where you see any possible gap between 9:30 and basically#5 fucking pm where I could even have ten minutes to myself. thankfully my first client is pretty easy going so I'll have some lunch then#I suppose. that is besides the point though#plus I get like... a few dollars above what is the Australian minimum wage per hour#anyway I'm so sick of this shit they did this yesterday too. multiple times over the last two months and tbh most of last year too
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trying to pull through for the last 2 days of bachelor writing... which.... have not gone well. And from my last 2 weeks of active working attempts... I do lowkey think I've run out of energy...
#I lowkey feel such rage about it#typically ends up directed at myself#I hate how people will only ever see the results and not my struggle nor my intent.#it'll just have to be shitty#like it's.... soooo shitty#and it's the only subject I've had all semester?? Like you'd THINK I could do better??#but no I'm generally burnt out and I've spent all on my energy to try figure out the logistics of my own living... cause the#personal economy was about to go to hell and so was having a place to live. cause HELL if I'm going back to my parents'.#but yea#didn't mean for this to be an update really. but! started up driving again! hopefully I'll get a lisence maybe next year or something!#that would be nice#my rambles
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Hey. Hi everyone. I'm alive still. And around. But not here, not on the warrior cats side of things. SOTM isn't over, not yet. But I need some time. I'll be back, I promise. Just give me more time. Thanks to everyone who's stuck around
#depression is a real hell of a thing#my seasonal depression has gotten me in such a vice grip#and the state of the world is...fuck man it's frightening#I thought I'd be good at the start of the new year#I've haf the newest chapter of moon high ready to go since end of December#but then the dread of having to write the next chapter. and then the next. and the next. reallyyy got me feeling like crap#I've worked on planning and scripting and writing this story since 2018 with very minimal breaks in between#nearly 7 years of this series#and while I still love and adore sotm and my characters I guess I've just finally burnt out?#I needed a long break from writing warriors stuff. I hardly wrote anything else other than cat stuff since I started this project#so recently I've been focusing on other characters and stories I wanna tell. haven't published anything but its been nice to toy with ideas#I've been thinking about sotm since the beginning of the year tho and I definitely plan to cone back to it#I just don't feel ready quite yet. but I will soon and hopefully I'll be better than ever#maybe when the seasonal depression subsides I'll be in a better mental state to hunker down and focus on my series#for now I'll be staying on hiatus#if for some reason down the line I decide to give up on the series tho#I will at least take tine to talk about everything that could have been#like plots and characters and stuff#but not yet because I still want to try and continue sometime#again thanks to anyone who's stuck around. take care of yourselves and see you soon
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its so weird thinking about childhood best friends you don't know anymore. like. the girl and her siblings who lived next door for year, who I used to considered my sister, who now looking back on it was probably my first crush ever, who swore we would grow up together, who was only 'visiting' her family for a month, turns out her parents lied to us, I never saw her again. the girls I went to summer to summer camp with every year and now I can barely remember there faces.
like. how are they doing?
I still can't conceptualize that these people who mattered *so* much to me are just... gone... chances are that I will never see them again, especially my best friend who's back in Pakistan, and even if I did, so much time has passed that I would most likely not recognize them even if I did see them.
#in my mind they're frozen in time#who knows where they are or who they've become#to me we're still 8 years old playing Minecraft in her basement#or 11 and going to the beach#or 12 and im sitting next to her at the dinner table#im 10 and meeting up with all my friends at summer camp#im 13 and its my last year at camp and we all sorta know we'll never see each other but we won't say it#im 14 and scrolling through my old Instagram trying to find a sliver of hope that I'll ever talk to her again#I miss her#I miss them#im forgetting her voice#how is one of the most important parts of me. of my childhood fading away?#currently sobbing#if fatima. who loves unicorns and dogs and the color purple and popcorn and brownies and left for a wedding and never came back. Hi.#your best friend misses you. More than you could ever know.#I still have those friendships necklaces that were supposed to come in before you left. they came 3 days after. I still have them in my room#I never gave the pink one to rose. I never saw her again either#personal vent
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the comments on my fics are some of the only things holding me together rn
#grammar? i hardly know her#The Author Of This Text Post Has Chosen Not To Use Archive Warnings#i still have my kidney stone i am suffering from the side effects of the flowmax i was prescribed i am sick bc my sister coughed in my#face last week when i was bathing her my period just started i am jobless and i'm on the last crumbs of my savings which are currently bein#eaten by medical bills i likely have to move the rent is being increased by $300 bc the landlord is a pos both sides of my family are strug#and i'm anxious about other family/health stuff and my friend is having a Really bad time and there's nothing i can do to help them and#i'll stop there i've already overshared enough#negative /#complaining /#period mention /#tmi /#fuck if i move out of state what am i gonna do about my credits i was gonna try and take the last few courses to finish my degree#....................#the reason i didn't do it this year was bc i couldn't afford it hahfhdshcfdfggfbfggffg...........#rip i guess haha ..................#i have some appointments w new drs next month and i hope i can pay the copay at each of them. it's literally $4....... yet i........#and i need to see some other ones too bc there r too many things wrong w me apparently. cool#life isn't that great rn but i will figure it out eventually#or maybe i won't#whatever i guess#opening the fic comments again i need to feel soemthign that isn't shitty feelings#scarlett.txt
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the thing abt grad school is that it's hard and after a year and a half im kind of already ready for it to be done with by now but also idk wtf im gonna do once im out
#i wanna talk about me#but i still have another year and a half so. pblblpblbpl :P#actually my last year is gonna be kind of bizarre bc i'm more or less committed to a fifth and sixth semester full time for my fellowship#but will only have 2-3 required classes left total (3 classes a semester is the full time enrollment min)#so i'll have 3-4 classes worth of credits to just. do whatever tf i want to.#maybe i'll take some oboe or piano lessons again. or fuck around and try voice or conducting#take some theater history. idk#see what's available ig#i really did not realize until today how little i have left in my libsci program#even changing my plans and taking only one libsci class next sem instead of my planned two#(with apologies to my libsci advisor. sorry im not taking your class like i said i might. i am more interested in arts admin.)#but i'll only have 3 electives left after that#im on a mission to minmax this dual degree in the most confusing and unconventional way possible#still havent heard back about my damn french credit thojgh. it's been three weeks and multiple emails.#um anyway#tired.
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