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#i'm not tagging the canon characters i don't want people to see this one
anotherothernight · 3 months
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Slushie (Toy Bonnie) and Lovesick <3 she's a little yandere and I think that's ok
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drew these for pride month last year ^^
(Mangle has the genderdoe flag and Funtime Foxy has the genderfaun and I think the rest should be obvious)
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and a bunch of Toyship children 😭 cuz I wanted to design stuff
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aithusarosekiller · 2 months
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This is on my tiktok but I wanted to post it here too bc it's really been bugging me
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The caption essentially said that if I see a characterisation I don't like (I used the example of big buff alpha remus) I just scroll because clearly the content was made for someone else and I'm not the target audience
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emdotcom · 3 months
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Idk why the fucken... Divide between "it was alternate universes" & "Paul is just trans" ideas for Petscop has to be torn into a cavern. Paul being trans DOES make sense, but requires you to ignore huge details that immediately make it not work. The alternate universes DO kind of make sense, but require you to extrapolate out a lot of info purposefully left unshown.
It's hard to describe what i want to say, here -- i do think Paul being trans makes sense, 'splains why he & Care "look eeriely similar," you could argue he's just thoroughly blocked out that part of his life enough to have forgotten Care entirely, etc. I like it, & i keep it as i also say "Yeah, it's that & the universes theory." It's not two switches that demand you can only flip on one of them -- you can have both. You can have neither. Do whatever
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thevillainsfangirl · 11 months
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Stans who try to turn sadistic, cruel, violent, deranged characters into Poor traumatized little beans who were abused and/or never actually wanted to do those things when canon literally says otherwise are actually just so fucking BORING.
Not only are they delusional, but they’re also just so fucking boring. Like... why the fuck do they want them to be a totally different character? These are stans, not fans; they don’t actually like that character, they like some 100% AU version of them to project on. (Or to thirst over, but they’re so delusional that they believe liking a fictional villain disrupts their real life morals, so they have to make them into someone entirely different. 🙄)
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fluentisonus · 1 year
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horrible dog guy doodles
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dirty-trash-mongrel · 9 months
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I don't hate or get annoyed by BiscuitBites/Nuzi as a ship, I just don't care much for most ships in general (besides PinkLemonade/Vizzy because personally I think their dynamic is really cute ok??) And I'm not irritated that Nuzi is becoming canon like a lot of people are complaining about, Murder Drones is not becoming a shipping-focused show because of this, this episode had probably the most horror and emotional scenes by far... I'm happy shipping wars will be over and I'm happy that people are voicing out their happiness that the ship is canon! Yippee! People are happy, everything is good, and I'm not irritated by that! What I do find irritating about some Nuzi shippers is that I'll have actual tears running down my face from reading a V memoriam post and then scroll down to see some people saying that they "didn't care V died that much and that they're glad that V is dead to completely set in stone Nuzi as a ship". Most of the main cast of characters were comfort characters for me and this is a shot in the heart because I loved V as a character. Even though I was kind of emotionally hurt by the last scene, I really do think a sacrifice was a good call by Liam. That won't stop me from being sad however. But PLEASE, I don't want to see people complaining about how everyone's upset over V's death and not putting enough focus on Nuzi confirmation (which both statements are super untrue, both get a respective amount of attention) Like I understand why some people wouldn't be super upset about the (presumably) V death, you can voice your own opinion and not be too emotionally affected by the death and I'm not judging you for that, but when I see people get to the point where they're judging and kind of shaming people for getting stressed or anxious or generally upset at a character death? It kind of kills me. Please stop beatboxing I'm crying on the floor Though a lot of Nuzi shippers I see aren't like this and I'm so happy about that, it's super nice to see that!!!! I've seen some of the most amazing works of this community come from Nuzi people and I still respect them so much because they're still people and part of this fandom even though I don't directly care much for the ship itself anymore, I'm not judging anyone based on their favorite robot pairings (UNLESS YOU'RE LIKE. A PROSHIPPER. ICK. OFF WITH YOU.) :)
#i really don't want to point out names on the people posting these things (also i completely forget because i tried to block out the posts)#i don't know if i'm the only one seeing them but i still hate it#crackships are funny though those fuel me so much#ooh and i think dizzy is fun i just prefer vizzy because DD x WD is fun imo#lizzy as a character is just.. top tier shipping material in my opinion#nuzi still is just meh for me#and i get why it's a comfort ship to many#i too shipped uzi for a short amount of time because i thought it was cute#but it's still one of the better ships and i see why liam wanted it to be canon#relationships with a lot of fluff can be comforting to some#i don't mean to offend anyone just i'm seeing a few of these and it's genuinely just kind of upset at this#LET ME COPE AND DON'T UNDERMINE THAT WAHHHH#but i really just get comfort from individual characters as an aro/ace and it really just hurts to see the disrespect of V's death#i don't know if this is even a hot take i'm just. :((((((((#AGAIN NOT GETTING UPSET AS NUZI SHIPPERS AS A WHOLE JUST I'VE SEEN POSTS THAT REALLY JUST KIND OF UPSET ME AND I'M SURE A FEW OTHERS AS WEL#im.#ranting#in tags.#guh.#I don't even know if I proofread this right I'm like too upset rn#murder drones#murder drones spoilers#dumpster bullshit#i'm not tagging ship tags because i really don't want to get involved in much drama#i really don't want any hate barrages on me in my asks or replies or dms about this#mongrel behavior
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ultimategirldad · 2 years
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[ID: screenshot from the spamton sweepstakes page, featuring a caption from the engraved wristwatch prize. It says "NEED PROOF? THERE LIES THE NAME OF THE [angel with the tattered wings]!". End ID]
So I think regarding this page. It's interesting to contextualise it with the text preceding it - especially the angel with the tattered wings part. 
I don’t think we’ve ever seen Noelle Holiday described like this before and it’s absolutely fascinating to me.
#deltarune#noelle#spamton sweepstakes#Edit: really long tags!! fyi#there is a lot I want to say but i'm too tired lol. anyways noelle holiday is a character with well documented flaws and--#--the text in that page doesn't feel ooc for me at all. like. yes she's indecisive. yes she's literally frozen in fear. yes she'll literally#inconvenience herself so she doesn't step on others toes. and yes she's not gonna do anything about the bullying because...#what CAN she do? talk to kris? something that's established as a Hard and Rare thing to do. tell a teacher? literally which teacher??#alphys the one who sees this happen day in and out and with the authority to make a difference... but doesn't. or toriel. which I'm#not even gonna explain why that would go terribly. So that leaves us with... noelle standing up to susie herself. which i'd like to#point out that noelle learns to stand up for herself and others by the *end* of chapter 2. so I think there's most definitely a#precedent here for noelle to act the way she does. she's deeply flawed and has many weaknesses to exploit (as we've seen in --#snowgrave) BUT she's deeply wonderful and kind and all of that coexists together.#WHOOPS I didn't mean for this to get so long sdfghjkl and rant-y uhm I'm really not that fussed I just think people are seeing--#a character act in a non-ideal way and immediately assuming that it has to be Not Canon or OOC or Wrong.#I agree the topic and text is uncomfortable but. not anything unexpected?? yeah that's my 2 cents#this was all typed in one go by a sleep deprived me so if I got anything incorrect please don't pick me apart thank u#cryptic capri#discourse#<-- just in case bc I went OFF on a tangent with this lol
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bluehairperson · 1 year
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I don’t want to start drama but I’ve seen some concerning posts floating around about how distasteful and disappointing it is to see certain creators “support” Dorian and I hate to break it to you guys, but if you’ve ever interacted, shared or created anything regarding The Arcana you are supporting Dorian yourselves.
Being in the fandom alone is supporting Dorian by creating engagement, publicizing the game and being part of the audience they’re trying to target.
And even if you were to delete your whole blog and everything you’ve ever posted to enjoy the original game in private you would still be supporting Dorian by bringing traffic to the app they now own.
The one and only way you have to stop supporting Dorian, if you care about it so much, would be to distance yourself from the series entirely and go join another fandom. Never play the original game ever again and never interact with any fan creation regarding it from now on. 👋
#you're basically saying you dislike people supporting the company by working with it#while you yourself are supporting the company but indirectly by giving visibility to their brand#let's be coherent please#I personally don't care about dorian just like I never cared about nix hydra#but I still like the game so I'm gonna cherry pick whatever I want#and full offence but between this and continuous character and ship discourse you guys are unsufferable lol#you're murdering the fandom from the inside by being toxic af and finding the most bullshit excuses to attack artists for shit#that doesn't matter and then you turn around and whine and wonder why the fandom is dying and no one is posting anything new anymore#like MMMMMMMMMNHHHHHHH 🤔🤔🤔#it's a mystery I wonder why#mentioning this because I also saw some discourse about dorian being awful for supporting quote unquote tOxIc and aBuSiVe ships 😨😨😨😨#with the most basic and vanilla couple I've ever seen here#like nix hydra was never great either but I've never ever seen posts claiming that if you support them you must be an awful person#what changed exactly?#it sounds to me that you guys are just really bitter that the new quote unquote canon content is... not super good so you're trying to#vent your frustration in any way you can#which means attacking independent artists who use the platform because it's easier to reach and demolish them rather than the company itself#I log on here to recharge after a day of work and all I see is people acting like twelve year olds trying to be mean like bruh#it's literally the hom3stuck 2 fandom situation I called it#tagging this as discourse so you can blacklist it if you don't wanna be annoyed#discourse#the arcana#dorian era#not art
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#pickle pontificates#i need to find a nice chill blog to follow for a certain fandom because I've been braving the wild west of the tag for a few weeks#and I'm sick and tired of seeing weird braindead discourse that's just rehashing stuff from every fandom ever and refusing nuance#i hate shipping discourse. sick of it#liking a ship or hating a ship does NOT make you morally superior or inferior or say anything about your political opinions#(in and of itself anyway)#like. yeah i don't ''get'' a lot of ships and don't really love any for this particular thing#but like. people are going to ship. they're going to ship things that don't make sense to you.#they're going to ship ''the wrong couples'' and ''the wrong genders'' (???) and there's nothing you can do about that#it's fair to vent about ships you don't care for or understand and it's fair to enthuse about ships you love#what i don't get is discourse with ppl vaguing in main tags back and forth like there's a debate to be had#there's not. there is no debate to be had in matters of preference#if ppl were really debating what makes canonical sense then sure. you could debate that#but there are only like two or less implied canonical ships in this fandom and NO official ones#NOTHING makes canonical sense. SHIPPING IS PREFERENCE. shipping is almost always inherently nonsensical to varying extents#you're not going to change anyone's preferences or behavior by complaining about a widespread cross-fandom phenomenon that's now here#this is an adult/teen story with adult characters aimed at an adult demographic#be an adult and mind your own business instead of acting like it's a moral social justice crusade to engage in shipping discourse#mkay rant over#okay to respond/reply btw i just don't want this in tags
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i am writing a script for a choose-your-own-adventure game about the mckinley assassination that will almost definitely never be made and having the time of my life
#(warning for some long tags)#it's part of a dlc that doesn't exist for another game that also doesn't exit#the main game is an original story related to time travel & dimensional warping & etc#and this hypothetical mckinley assassination game that i mentioned would not make much sense without the main game#bc lore and stuff#but i don't care about the main storyline as much as i care about one where you interact with leon czolgosz#i'm drawing some of the character sprites(?) too. so far i've done one of atlas (oc; from main game) & one of victoria czolgosz#atlas is there at the very beginning with janai (another main game oc) to tell you what's happening & give you some items#he shows up later in the game to help you out a little if you go to crystal beach#victoria shows up when you go to the restaurant where she works. you ask if she knows a leon f czolgosz* and she's like 'my brother? how do#you know him?' and you talk to her and she says that the last she heard from him he was in fort wayne but that was over two weeks ago so#she's not sure what he's up to right now. then she cries a little over how she's worried about him and quickly writes a letter and asks you#to give it to him if you find him then asks you to keep him safe. caroline** can then respond like 'ok :-) i will' or be like 'i'm not his#mom or smth i don't even know this guy why are you asking this of me.' and this will influence your relationship with her which can have#effects later. bc depending on what path you take you might see her again. also can affect your relationship with leon later if they end up#interacting.#*you start the game in cleveland so you know that some of the people there know him#**the protagonist's name is caroline. she has no canonical surname but she calls herself 'ascher' here as an allusion to motka from the#anarchist. i want to put more the anarchist allusions in there but idk where yet.
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livesinthebalance · 1 year
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So I posted something because of Loverwatch when it first happened and I told myself I was not going to get invested in another ship between my own characters but. Here we are again.
To quote what I said to the other two people I regularly [ terrify ] plot with:
It's still a pretty rough sketch that needs more work what else is new? but
Here's the gist:
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The thought occurred to me that Genji is difficult to snuggle without getting pinched or imprints from the cybernetics and then just the general weight being heavier than a normal person.
Which he knows. So I suspect he would have been hesitant at first, but Abby insisted there is no engineering issue that doesn't have a solution and the same applies here. So they figured out some ways to make it work, usually by sleeping side by side and using pillows and a thick comforter to help cushion.
I have no excuse for this except a lack of self-control and that I like to see Genji happy because he deserves to be. That is all. 😂 [ And also I still blame Loverwatch, hence the relationship tag. ]
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sm-baby · 6 months
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I want to see all the carnival AU bios again, but finding Zooble's is too hard, even when using the search. I hope there's a more organized way to view them.
(Trying to come up with nicknames that said characters would give my characters.)
CARNIVAL AU MASTERPOST + BOUNDARIES
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Augh... I never know how to organize stuff! But here is a mini master post of the TADC Info Cards (edited):
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The Main Cast (Minus Zooble :C)
Zooble ( Plus Zooble!!! :3)
Shiny Cards ✨
Lesser AI
THE GLOINKS!!!
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Level layout
OFFICIAL COMIC:
The Entire Comic has also been dubbed by @volticglitch !! If you're not a reader, You can watch their dubs instead!! Here is the dub
Your best friend!
Jesterly duties
The hallway
Crying
First clue
Special event!
Foul language - a silly
CONCEPT ART:
Characters Relationship Chart ( Bonus, OC relationship Chart!)
The Tent
The Funhouse
Cutscene
Pomni expressions
Character design
Meet Pomni
ALT character skins (Bonus, Maid skins because of course I did)
Pomni expressions AGAIN!!! (and a bonus)
The Jester's Circus tent (and a bonus)
References
Shape language ramble
LOREEE:
Neck pieces
Neck pieces (prt 2)
Neck pieces (prt 3)
Silly Frilly
Toxic Positivity Duo
Quick Ragatha Doodle
The Rabbit
Non-sentient Pomni
Pity Laugh
First act of violence
First and only visit
DOODLE DUMPS:
First look
Meet Jax
Meet Ragatha
Meet Kinger
Meet Able
Zooble's room
Theatre shinanigans
Thanks for listening
Jax Doodles
Ragatha doodles (Feat. Kaufmo)
Caine doodles
Queenie?
Colored doodles
Eye popping
Jax Ko-fi request!
SILLIES:
Final boss Pomni Theory
Ofcourse you would
Shoulder Pads
test
omg showtime teeheeh ehehehe
CUTIES!!!
MORE SHOWTIME (HAVE I REALLY NOT ADDED THIS IN BEFORE??)
Carnival AU meets Original
its ok she's not drowning
The Amazing Digital... Circus???
A Christmas Carol Play!
Carnival Freakshow AU Merge!! (Freakshow AU by @hootbon)
BUZZBUZZ!! Fan character by @awful-little-goose
Whore Pomni Inside joke - more slutshaming
Pomni where yo pants at
shitpost doodles
SCANDAL!!
SCANDAL!! (alt)
Genderbend time!!
Stupid fucking doodles i made at like 11 pm
Stupid fucking doodles i made at like 11 pm (I dont know why I keep making these ToT)
stupid shinanigans involving Pomni's tent (Pomni's tent for context)
POMNI LET GO OF HIM!!!!!!!!
BUBBLE DAMN
Please hear her out guys
Kinger with no robe!!!
Bunnydoll real?!?!!?(Kofi request by amazing people :3)
Genderbend Jax!
Dollar store Carnival AU
Gangle simping over Able slay - Gangle PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER
Carnival GAINE!! - bro's so strong and cool and awesome
Flirty non-sentient pomni Inside joke (TW For suggestive themes): NON-CANON
Start
Context
Flirty non-sentient pomni (shitpost)
Pomni..........
Memory storage restart
the silly!!
no you're not.
oh god
someone paid me 10 bucks
SOMEONE PAID ME MORE MONEY
╔══ ❀•°❀BOUNDERIES/FAQ❀°•❀ ══╗
"Can I make OCs In Carnival?" - Yess!! Multiple people already have and they make me so happy! do whatever, as long as you're happy and having fun!! " Can I make NSFW?" - Yas and slay, just be sure to warn and spoiler it, etc. etc. be responsible when posting NSFW! " Can I make Fanfics?" - Yes and please show me!! that would be lovely!! " Can I dub/voice your stuff?" - Yes but, I have only one rule... show me pleaaasseeee pls pls pls 🥺🙏 " Can I ship the characters/self ships/ OC x Canon?" - Aughh.. this is gonna suck to explain cuz its a lot to ask.. You're allowed to ship any ship! My only boundary is that it doesn't include either Pomni or Caine being with others who are not eachother! For example: Ragatha x Jax ✅ Pomni x Jax❌ Kinger x Queenie✅ Kinger x Caine❌ As long as the ship does not include Pomni or Caine individually, I'm all aboard!! I respect Jax x Pomni shippers, as well as Kinger x caine shippers, I just don't like them myself and don't want to accidentally stumble upon them in the tag! I do apologize if that's a lot, it just makes me uncomfy! Bounderies can be very tight! :')
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loveofdetail · 8 months
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i want to talk about Gale's "I'm not quite sure I'd consider myself father material" line because I think a lot of the fandom brushes it off as just another manifestation of his profound negative self-image but ummmmmmm. well i simply hard disagree. i think he's RIGHT, i think this is a moment of him having an honest and accurate self-assessment: he wouldn't be a good parent.
i do not say this as hate, i say this as someone who also would make a terrible parent. i'm impatient and intense about my own wants and i won't give up the freedom to do frankly irresponsible shit from time to time. i know this about myself and i look at gale and go "same hat."
if i'm being fully honest i find the quantity of pregnancy/parenthood content in the gale dekarios tag really off-putting. yes i have filters but they simply don't catch everything. i'm not trying to rain on anyone's parade, if that's what you like go wild with it no judgment etc etc. i know it's Just One Line of dialogue and a pretty ambivalently phrased one at that and it's everybody's inalienable right to ignore canon anyway, so...
but. man. in my heart of hearts it is genuinely alienating to see a character who 1) struggles with impulsiveness 2) struggles with suicidality 3) has a tendency to dismiss people who aren't on his level 4) is in the depths of navigating his own selfish/ambitious streak 5) hyperfixates on intellectual interests to a sometimes unhealthy degree and MOST OF ALL 6) expresses real doubt toward the idea of parenthood!!! ...get fandomified into The Perfect Dad. sorry.
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regicidal-optimism · 2 months
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You've been reblogging more stuff about female characters getting ignored by fandoms recently and I would be really curious to hear your full views on the topic.
The thing is that... look. I get it. Many fandoms do not have very many women in their canon, many of those women are treated pretty poorly by the canon or aren't given as much depth as their male peers, and if you're at all picky the pickings are kind of slim (I would love to be a fan of c!Niki, if I were able to watch six-hour vods, which I am not). It is not wrong that most works with large fandoms are really, really sexist, and the problem is not just in the fanbase!
But come the fuck on. It is not an accident that the DSMP and the MCU and BNHA, all of which are vast-majority male and the female characters are treated terribly, are megafandoms, and Revolutionary Girl Utena is eligible for yuletide. It is not wrong that if you want to see more female-character-focused fanwork you should go to Sailor Moon and not The Untamed, but it is also kind of missing the point to say that and not look at the difference in size between those fandoms. People can say "it's because the male characters are so often more interesting and have more meaningful interactions," and like, sometimes that's even true, I will be the first to tell you that quackbur has more to it than tinarose, but please compare the Clint/Coulson tag to the Utena/Anthy tag and look me in the eye and tell me that's the only thing driving the trend. With a straight face.
And even more there's a thing where— so, I was a mod in the @ao3topshipsbracket bracket. And femslash ships, once they were in the bracket, did really well. Like, absurdly well, like 80% of the f/f ships entered got to the top 16, and the last one was against blackbonnet which was never gonna lose in round 1. You might notice something about that number, though, which is that there were only five of them entered total, because people love to vote for femslash but they absolutely will not write it. And they won't say anything about it either! I was watching the activity feed the entire tournament, and I can tell you, for all of the "let's go lesbians" that populated our notes, nobody would say anything that was actually about the specific characters who made up their ship. I learned a lot about Naruto fandom, modding that bracket; I still know nothing about CW Supergirl, because the only thing anyone would say about it is "it has women in it". Because women are interchangeable. Because women are avatars of Being A Good Feminist. Because clicking a button is easy, and actually thinking about any specific woman and her traits and her internality is hard.
The thing is that guilt over misogyny does not actually fix misogyny. It gets you a lot of people who vote for women in polls, and who say "he's like a woman to me" about their male faves but notably don't have any canonically female characters they talk about, and who say that the only thing they care about in a fic is if it has women in it but will not ever actually say anything about any specific woman, and who never shut up about yuri but apparently yuri is everything and anything except women who have feelings about one another.
I'm tired! I'm very tired. I want people to actually give a shit about specific women and their specific traits, which do not begin and end with "woman". And, also, to stop treating women exclusively as the wingmen, advice-givers, mom figures, and accessories of men.
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kneelingshadowsalome · 11 months
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Just Friends (König x F!Reader)
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How to Get Her Back 4/4 (Word count 7.3 k)
Summary: König is a horny, creepy killing machine obsessed with a shy, kind reader who has a raging knife kink.
Tags/warnings: 🔞 Eventual smut, eventual violence, angst, dark romance, canon divergence. Crack treated seriously. Yandere undertones, implied stalking, panty stealing, major character death, size kink, voyeurism, possessive sex, twisted, fluffy feelings. Loner boy/gentle girl dynamic. Protective!Obsessive!Top!König. Reader works as a cleaner at the base. She is described to have hair and prefers to wear dresses off work. Not safe or sane but mostly consensual.
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The knife still juts from the table.
She touches it often, fondles the handle like it's her lover.
Days pass, and König escapes her stare with raised shoulders and poorly disguised hurt in his eyes. She feels his eyes on her every single time she's not looking.
He breaks into her room every night, but she never wakes up to his presence. The only thing that tells her the man's been there are the fresh flowers on her table next to the knife.
He brings her flowers every morning, just like he promised, and she keeps the blade there to remind him that he's still in her heart. It's like a silent conversation, and it stabs her stomach full of pain.
On the fourth day, he returns her panties. They're covered in dried cum, and at first, it makes her feel disgusted. Then her heart flutters, a warm feeling settles deep inside her stomach when she imagines him jerking himself off to her underwear amidst his knives, with despair and longing coating the air.
For anyone else, it might be a chilling thing to wake up to: to open eyes to the sight of a brutal tactical knife, freshly picked forget-me-nots and some cum-stained lace. But for her, it's a loving attempt to remind her who she belongs to. It's also a sign that the man is trying to let her go and finally obey her wishes to be left alone.
And she doesn't want to be left alone.
He promised she would never be alone.
On the fifth day, there's no flowers, there's nothing. She starts her day with a horrible, awful bawl. Then she puts on a black dress. It makes her look odd, like she's in mourning, but it also gives her… power, somehow. Even if it's another cute kind of cotton babydoll dress, it makes her look more austere.
“König, wait.”
She chases him down this time: runs to his retreating form that stops the instant she calls his name. He’s tense when she walks the last steps to him and hugs him from behind. The familiar scent of tea tree and gasoline and sweat and guns bring a visceral memory of madness to her mind. It’s an ambrosia of crude virility, and she's missed him, God, that she's missed him.
It's also safety. Because no matter what anyone says, he is the only one who knows her, sees her, sees right into her core, her very soul.
He slowly places a hand on hers, the arms that embrace his narrow, treelike middle.
"Engel…"
The voice comes out tight and strained. He caresses her hand with hesitation and swallows.
"I'm confused.. I don't know what you want me to do."
"Come with me," she whispers in his back. He has no gear on, and she can feel his abs through the black shirt, the way his shoulder blades flare against her cheek with shallow breaths. "If you want…?"
"Ganz sicher."
She takes him by the hand and guides him to her room. People look at them with pity and dread, and she feels like they’re in high school where people were divided into groups of popular and unpopular.
She knows where she and König would’ve belonged. Where they belonged now…
And she just doesn't care anymore.
When the door to her room shuts behind him, she feels a little tug near her heart. She had nearly forgotten how big König looks inside her little room, the space she has tried to turn into a cozy home even though she doesn't view the base as her home like the soldiers do. It's just a place for her to reside in when she's working.
But he does not fit into a normal society like she does. The base must be the closest thing to a home for him. Not every elite soldier is a lunatic perhaps, but König certainly couldn't find any other job in the modern world that would cater to his needs without sending him behind bars.
But he was supposed to kill only in the field. Only somewhere far, far away.
Why did you do it?
Why…?!
That's what she meant to ask when they're behind closed doors, but something quite different comes out instead.
"Did you miss me…?"
She stands before him, holding her hands in front of her, looking probably quite silly clad in black.
"I've been in hell ever since I left, Engel."
Christ have mercy…
Normal men just didn't talk like that.
"Will you forgive me?" He looks her up and down, but the calm, proud posture, the way he holds his chin high behind that dark shroud tells her he's not used to begging. She has a feeling that this question is asked only because Soap suggested it would be a good idea to apologize for making her so upset.
"It's not me you should be–" She sighs. "Look… That man had a wife. König, I think he had a kid and everything."
His eyes are covered in a veil of disinterest only she can pierce. There's actually so much going on behind that odd, distanced stare. But what’s horrifying is that he clearly doesn’t agree with her on this matter.
"I kill people every week," he declares. "Just not in the break room."
His logic leaves her wordless for a moment. The officer was not an enemy, he was not part of some foreign military, his only crime was that he was in a hurry…
She has barely even opened her mouth to speak before he finally defends himself.
"How do you know his wife is not secretly happy with the news?"
The question is like a bucket of ice dipped in her head. She had prepared herself for almost anything but this. König only tilts his head and narrows his stare.
"Would you want to be wife to that kind of man?"
Her mouth opens on its own; her jaw would fall to the floor if it could do such a thing. His worldview unfolds before her in full, and it should disgust her: but all she feels is an odd thrill in her stomach from realizing this man is not only possessive; he's also fiercely traditional.
"He just spilled some coffee on me," she whispers in soft, tender horror. "He just happened to have a bad day."
"How many times a week did he have a bad day?"
The defense is solid, even if it's preposterous. The man was rude and disrespectful, yes. To everyone, every day, probably continued the abuse at home, too. But he didn't deserve to be killed for it. Still, König doesn't seem to find any fault in his way of thinking.
"I can tell when people are evil," he crosses his arms over his chest as a final note.
Evil…
Evil.
She's left blinking, then she finds her tongue again.
"You can't just… deal punishment like that," she huffs.
"Why not?"
Jesus Christ…
His arms are still over his chest, and he looks… so big, so powerful, like an omnipotent being.
Probably thinks he is.
"Will you go to jail?" She changes the subject because arguing with this kind of man seems futile. Downright hopeless.
"No," he says with perpetual calm. "Would you want to see me in jail?"
"...No."
He finally unravels his arms and takes a few steps toward her. That swaying lounge is intoxicating and seductive, even when he doesn't mean it as such. It's just the way he walks, but it makes her woozy.
"Engel. You are too… kind for this world."
More odd arguments are laid out before her, more confusion and love and pain. He raises a hand to touch her arm and make his point clear. The weight of him is heavy and adult, his military clothing is in blaring contrast to her tiny, childish dress.
"You don't understand it now, but perhaps someday you will."
The man looks like he doesn't quite know what to do with her. She's a child in his eyes, but something in this lunacy tells her she's dealing with a child, too: a boy who no one ever loved.
"My little angel. Always wearing pretty dresses," he says more softly now.
"I'm not an angel."
"Yes you are," he rules without effort. "And you look good in everything. But you shouldn't wear black."
"Why not…?"
"Because you belong with flowers."
Her heart aches, her eyes prick with burning tears. He's self-aware, that's for sure. He knows what he has done to her, what he is doing to her. And he wishes to spare her from him.
"I thought you liked black," she peeps, her mind and will and defense breaking.
He doesn't say anything, but his hand brushes down her cheek, then cups her chin softly. That same hand must be ironclad when it grips his enemies and brings them to his blade.
"I like this dress," she tries to quarrel, voice shaking.
"And I know a knife that would go perfectly with it."
His eyes are warm. There's even a passing sadness in them. She's relatively sure that he's not talking about butterfly knives any longer – she's almost certain that König hasn't gifted his weapons to any other human being on this earth.
“How about we take off that pretty little dress now, hmm?”
The time for the compulsory explanations is over in his mind, and it’s time for sex. He knows that his exile has ended, that whatever liminal space they walked in for a few days wasn’t enough to rid herself of him. There’s no turning back anymore, and he looks at her with amused hunger when she obeys his suggestion which is, in truth, a command.
Her fingers do not shake anymore as she undresses for him, but a shiver goes through her guts: that stare is a look from beyond. He’s a madman, and falling more in love with her every day, even if the only way he knows how to love is by stabbing people with his cock or his knife.
“Lie down,” he gives her more orders when she stands before him with nothing on.
It’s futile, completely futile to pretend that she doesn’t want this. It’s almost like an act, the way she slowly and demurely obeys his command. In reality, she wants nothing more than to be devoured by him.
He takes his clothes off while she waits for him on the bed like an injured bird. He rips, then throws his gloves off like they have done something naughty, all the while his gaze is fixed on her. She has missed the sight of that faint hair on his abs, missed that broad chest, missed how his muscles bunch even when he gets out of a shirt that weighs practically nothing in his hands.
The long, veined cock flies out from his pants with a demanding bounce that makes her swallow. They form an odd pair on the floor: her little dress and his huge woodland camos. His eyes are surrounded in black paint under the eternal mask, but otherwise, he's the palest man she has ever seen.
Her breasts rise and fall with aroused breaths as he settles himself beside her, naked and blazing. His cock is pure fire when it gets trapped between them, and he's already drooling hot precum on her thigh.
He's gentle, kind of. Slides a hand over her shivering stomach, palms one breast, then takes a nipple between his fingertips and gives her a pinch.
“Did you miss me too?”
The hood makes him look like a hangman, and he’s infuriatingly patient now. She expected him to rail her like a sex toy right after the door was closed.
"Yes."
He releases her, and the callous descends with a gentle, deliberate caress to her waist.
"Then you're the first who ever did."
She just might be the first woman he's gentle with, too, and she cannot help but think if it's because of what she said just before he killed that poor man. If the last piece of the puzzle locked in place when he realized how much she admired him. If her confession also made him stake his claim in the loudest possible way, announcing everyone that he's her protector.
It's not her fault that the man's dead, but she should be ashamed: she's wet already when the murderer's fingers delve further down to meet her folds. He disappears somewhere in her wetness, and her thighs rise and drift apart to give him full access.
And it's always like this: she spreads legs for him with a helpless, longing stare, he takes in what belongs to him with dark, pleased hunger.
He finds her clit in no time, drags his thumb over it, and she gasps. Her breaths come quick now, her nipples are shot to the sky and her back is already arching when he delves down and slides one finger inside. It's long and lean, and her cunt grips him like they have been apart for four weeks instead of four days.
He sighs under the mask, just from her greedy response. She wants to touch him too, but doesn't dare to move when he's looking at her like that. He starts to finger her gently, first with one, then two digits while attending to the tight nub on top. And he's good with a knife, quick with his hands, so what did she expect?
But she’s also sad and mad. Because he definitely knows what he’s doing. And it makes her think…
"Have you had a lot of women..?"
Her question is a mouse's whisper. His fingers halt inside her; they spread her with delicious torture.
"A few," he says. "Back in Austria."
He buries his face in her neck and nuzzles his way to her ear. The bag of darkness is soft and hot, but nothing compared to his heated whisper.
"But they were nothing like you."
He punctuates the declaration by curling the fingers inside her. She bites her lip to stifle a filthy, needy moan. He even grinds his hips against her: that cock is like a heated spear against her soft thigh, and more cum oozes out to trickle down her leg.
"How many men have had you, Engel?"
He doesn't ask: how many men has she had. She may not be his plaything, but she is his possession. In his mind, she belongs to him and only him, no matter who has come before. But the murderous passion with which he waits for her answer makes her flustered, and she bolts her mouth tight in an indication that she will not disclose this information.
"Gut. Don't tell. I would kill them all."
Oh.
Oh…
"Would you like that…?"
"No," she whimpers.
"Yes you would."
“I don’t–I don't want you to–”
“Shh.”
He’s working those fingers smooth and quick, and she’s already leaking on his hand, probably on the bed, too… The room is filled with sighs and whimpers and sobs as he fucks her with slick, wet sounds. She's close the edge in mere minutes, but he won’t let her finish.
Instead, he pulls out just when she's about to tighten around him.
"Why-why did you stop?"
"Angel... Take me in your mouth," he rasps, breathless too despite trying to disguise it. She briefly wonders if this is some sort of a punishment. That perhaps she’s ordered to give him a blowjob just when she’s about to come – after all, she has dared to keep him waiting for days.
But that’s not the case, it seems, as she moves with heavy limbs to fulfill his wish.
"Nein… Other way around. I want to taste you."
The perverse suggestion in the break room turns into a reality as she realizes what he wants to do. Her heart is pounding when she crawls on top of him to meet that leaking cock. How exactly is that thing even going to fit inside her mouth?
A sudden shyness takes her as her thighs are forced into a wide-legged spread from straddling the broadest man on earth. She's exposed to the cold air only for a second before his breath hits her. The shortest shadow of a stubble on that usually clean-shaven chin meets her soaked cunt with hunger.
“Ah… Take it– in your mouth,” he moans orders to her folds, and her cunt clenches immediately, just from hearing that accent and that voice.
She moves to give him a shy lick, sweeps a tongue over that tip to clean him from all that precum. He goes tense under her and breathes heavily when she wraps her hand around him, wraps her mouth around the weeping slit.
He tastes of salt and sin, and the minute she tries to take more of him in, he groans with a dry throat. It's a hot, broken breath that travels straight inside her. It’s too much – the position is far too stimulating, it’s over the top wicked.
And then he starts to lick her. It messes up the blowjob that has barely even started. She knows his hood must be almost completely off, otherwise he wouldn't be able to breathe.
"Take a bit more, Engel," he urges between the long slathers that already sound lewd. There's simply no way to take it fully in, he’s far too long for that. The last thing she wants to do is gag on him. But she does a good enough job, tries to concentrate on breathing through her nose as she goes as deep as she can.
"That's…more like it…"
It’s a relieved notion somewhere behind her before he continues with the agonizingly slow licks. Fat and flat-tongued, the work of a famished man. For someone who's so clumsy with social interaction, he’s infuriatingly good at giving pleasure to women. The tip of his tongue grazes her clit, and causes a muffled moan – her mouth is full of him but she just cannot help herself.
And arms of steel close around her middle the minute she whimpers on his cock. They pull her closer to his face – he wants to hear her make noise, then, and her will to compete arises. She wants to make him moan too. She ups the pace, flattens her tongue on him every time she retreats…
"Where did you learn to–nnh…"
She nearly laughs at his surprise, at their silly little competition. He's shocked, probably jealous too, of her past and the imagined cavalcade of men who may or may not have been inside her mouth before him. She swirls a tongue around the tip every now and then, wraps her lips tight around him, and goes even deeper.
"Verdammte Scheiße.. I'm not going to last long…"
Strong thighs around her power up, and he has stopped licking her altogether: he's just panting in her pussy and holding on to her hips while waiting for the upcoming wave.
"You know what to do, ja?" He pants that question like she doesn't know he's about to shoot a load on her tongue soon.
"Don't make a mess," he shares advice with a sly tone to his voice. "Unless you want to clean after…"
He gives a short laugh as if the joke is funny. As if that's a clever thing to say to a cleaning lady. It makes her grip him harder, and he's close, so close: he's not even moving anymore, everything's just completely rigid under her body and inside her mouth.
"I'm fucking–cumming…"
He spills with a long groan, moans against her cunt, cries inside her with pain. The seed is hot and heavy, it shoots right down her throat even in this position. She does the best she can to not make that mess, but it's hard work when a giant cock pulses in her mouth.
"You're perfect, angel," he sighs behind her, tries to feed more of himself inside her mouth by rolling his hips.
The praise makes her pump and suck him even more, get every last drop out, and a tremble goes through her lover. She has to take support from the bed until the earthquakes recede. His cock is a clean mess after, and she's a mess too: overworked, and shy, and victorious.
They're both left panting: she tries to catch some breath there between his thighs after everything, but she's not allowed to rest and recover. The grip around her middle pulls her back, and a breathless man trying to lick her like it's the end of the world is not only far too much, it's unbearable. She's already overly sensitive and needy from the four days of barren grief.
"It's too much…" She tries to tell him, but he won't listen. If anything, it only spurs him on.
"König, I can't," she wails softly while resting her head on his thigh.
"Yes you can."
A feverish tongue dips inside her as deep as it goes. It forces her legs apart, she spreads herself all over his face completely unwillingly. There's no mercy for her as he flicks a tongue over her clit, plunges a tongue inside her as deep as it goes, returns to the nub again – does it again and again and again like it's some secret code meant to break her.
"You like that, huh?" His rough voice is muffled by her cunt, he sounds both parched and wet.
"Hm? Talk to me," he demands an answer although it should be obvious that she's losing her mind from his treatment.
"Yes," she mewls while being spread so crudely wide for him. "I… I love it…"
"Hah. You sound like a little cat," he laughs, pleased, then gets to it again. She's so close now that she can feel the growing waves. Her thighs are not just shaking, they're trembling.
"So pretty and so wet," he comments between the licking and dipping, voice covered with smoke from all the lust. And he's hard again, too: right next to her face, and she could cry actual tears – what if he plans on fucking her too after this? It's too much, she can't even take this, she can't…
But she does.
Her back starts to arch just before the orgasm. She's not weeping yet, but every noise she makes sounds like she's crying her heart out.
"Slow down, slow–down, please…"
She's a one-woman choir of tight pleas. She tries to muffle them by burying her face somewhere in his thighs and musk. The tongue dips in and out like he's a machine and not a man, and the first wave hits unexpectedly, like a searing, white-hot blade.
"A–ah!"
The climax swallows her, she starts grinding against that face without meaning to. He only laughs and buries his nose and tongue deeper into her slickness. The arms around her hold her like iron bars, his breaths hit her along with his tongue like she's strapped to a torture device.
Her cunt is sloppy, and throbbing, and he is a torturer, licks her even when she's lying on top of him in ruin: a devastated, trembling heap of a woman who's lost everything.
"Stop–König, you need to stop…"
Her weak whispers do nothing. His tongue sweeps her from front to back until she's crying on top of him. Frail fingers try to claw his thighs but grasp nothingness.
When he finally relents, he does it with another laugh. Then he gives her a last lick: a total bully, snorts a chuckle when a tremble goes through her entire body from just that single, fat sweep.
"Mmm. That was good. Right?"
"M–mh…"
There are tears in her eyes, but not one comes out. Her pussy throbs and winks with the aftershocks, and his hand moves up and down her back like she's that little cat.
"You're mean," she sobs. Complains.
"Heh… you didn't like it?"
"I did," she sniffs, and his hand moves to caress her thigh.
"I know you did. I know you. Everything about you."
He sounds merciful at last, pats her leg softly.
"Come here. I'll take care of you."
When she turns and crawls back to him, his mask is fully in place. He receives her with open arms and speaks more softly than ever.
"I have to take care of you after. Isn't that so?"
"Yes…"
She holds onto him, because he's the only thing that's solid in her world at this point. His aftercare is the most tender thing she has ever known: her hair is being caressed gently, the tension in her neck and back is soothed with long, loving strokes. He buries his mask in her hair and inhales her after-sex scent like it's a whole offering of incense.
"Angel. You feel like… like it's my birthday."
His statement brings another round of tears to her eyes. Instinct tells her that birthdays might've been the only happy days of the year for this man.
"I didn't hurt you, did I?"
He sounds worried when she's so quiet and timid again. Her heart settles slowly into a warm pool of love, she presses herself against him with fervor, and he squeezes her in turn like she's the most perfect birthday present ever.
"No."
I really needed that.
I need you…
"I will never let you go again," he promises. "Never. Do you understand?"
"Yes," she whispers. "I don't– I don't want you to go."
"Little one. I'm so glad I found you."
He takes her palm and uses it to brush away the hood from his lips. The violent edge is always taken away after sex, and the devouring is gentle, the passion is blunt. His kiss is soft; sweet.
"König…" She's raw and bare in his arms, her adoration reflects back to her from his blues. "Why did you pick me?"
"You're the one who picked me, Engel. I just answered your call."
He takes in the effect this truth has on her, then takes her breath away with another kiss. A small giggle erupts in the lazy afternoon as he threatens to crush her with a bear hug. Her hand steals its way further under the mask: she meets smooth skin and a collection of even smoother bumps.
"Why can't I see your face..?"
"It's not a pretty sight," he sighs. "Father liked to cut me when I was little."
The laziness leaves her body that very instant. The man is detached, distant: as if he's sharing something trivial, the city he grew up in or his favorite subject in school.
She doesn't know whether to feel pity or terror, but what he says next sends even more ice down her spine.
"Now I cut those who are evil."
Everything starts to make perfect sense.
Why he was bullied at school, why people fear him. Why disrespectful, cruel men deserve to be knifed and why women and wives are angels. Why he wears a mask.
It's not sound reasoning, but it is a strategy, perhaps. Survival… A defense mechanism.
And offense is the best defense…
She had been right: this man is incurable, only in ways she could never have guessed.
Afterwards, he shows her his knives.
His room is full of them: combat knives, throwing knives, bowie knives, daggers, bayonets, balisongs, two machetes, a kukri, knives she doesn't even have a name for… There's swords and sticks and a riot shield. There's only one bed, nothing more, not even a nightstand.
And the room is also full of guns.
Assault rifles, sniper rifles, shotguns, handguns; there's scopes, tripods, gloves, gas masks, a ghillie suit, pouches, plate carrier vests, magazines, grenades, even a launcher.
The room is filled with violence.
And she didn't know what she expected.
Some "Hot Gun Babes" wall calendar and a few pocket knives? That he would play by the rules and keep weapons and gear where they were stored instead of in his fucking room?
He gives her his third gift that pairs well with her black dress, or any dress, for that matter. Another knife, but not the kind he kills people with, nor the flimsy kind used for entertainment purposes.
She receives an automatic switchblade, simple but pretty. The double-edged blade looks almost feminine, the way it curves into a sharp, dainty tip. The handle is made of sturdy, polished wood; it's incredibly beautiful and so dark it's nearly black. The knife is only a threat when it's flicked open: all in all a piece that isn’t what it seems.
"Hier. Good little blade. Would take it wherever I go."
"Thank you."
"Anything for you, Engel."
She kisses him after his gift. She kisses the white scar on his jaw, lifts the mask a bit more, and he doesn't stop her. He doesn't stop her, not even when she finds more keloid cuts and kisses them too.
And he's… simply a man.
There's a human under all that darkness.
It's not a pretty sight, perhaps, but for those scars, she couldn't love him more.
"You're not afraid of me," he sounds surprised when she takes in the violence done to his face with tenderness in her gaze.
"No."
He's speechless. The barricade covering his eyes is permanently broken, and she can see him, all of him.
She falls to her knees and opens his pants, gives the man another round of love. He looks at her with pain and pleasure; a pale, adoring god. Strokes her hair gently while she gets drunk on him like a succubus, wants him to spill that white on her face and all over her pretty black dress.
"Cum on my face, König."
She looks at him with angel eyes while saliva and drool make a rope from her mouth to his throbbing cock. But there is nothing left of the celestial, nothing more than a sweet, fallen angel, and a safe space just for her and him.
"Please…?"
Ruin me.
He hesitates a few seconds, then grabs his cock in an iron fist like it's heavy artillery.
"Whatever my angel wants, she shall have."
. . . . . .
He brings her flowers every morning and fucks her every night.
Sometimes he catches her when she's outside in the sun, reading a book or watching the clouds. He carries her off to the woods and takes her against a tree like they're the first man and woman on the earth after tasting the forbidden apple. They share a few hushed laughs and more than a few desperate kisses under the hood, then he brings her back to earth, straightens her dress like a gentleman before leaving to have a date with death.
He takes her out to eat sometimes, takes her to the shooting range. Calls her his little Wildkatze when she takes a liking to one of his shotguns. He takes her hand when they stroll through the grass and sings an old love song from his homeland. He has a beautiful voice, especially when he forgets he's in company. Or perhaps she's just special like that…
They share a secret language in the base. Whenever he sees her, he draws his knife and throws it in the air ("I miss you") or twirls it around ("The things I will do to you tonight…"). Sometimes, he just places a hand on the handle of the cruel blade. That stands for 'You're mine'.
It's the closest thing to I love you before either of them have spoken the actual words. Or then it's the closest thing to I love you he's capable of.
She gives him a small smile in return, puts a hand in her pocket and fondles the gift she carries everywhere she goes. He knows it's a nod to his secret messages. It stands for 'You're my everything'.
She keeps the switchblade with her even when she's wearing a dress after work. Red this time, the color of passion.
She wants to surprise him: König always comes to her before nightfall, but this time, she wants to go and visit him. She wants him to take her in the middle of black steel and acrid gunpowder while she's dressed in blood.
"Be a darling and fix me a cup of coffee, will you?"
She's stopped by Phillip Graves of all people. Another man who has never paid her any attention. Apparently, red cloth is the same thing for evil men as it is for the enraged animals in bullfighting shows.
She does stop, but she doesn't obey his wishes. She just stares him down like he's filth: another thing she thought she could never do.
I'm not your coffee girl.
"C'mon honey. I've had a bad day." The man only seems to feed off from her silent scorn: like it's some dark game they're playing now. "You could make it so much better."
For fuck's sake…
Here is a man who disrespects everything about her: her position as a cleaner, her value as a woman, her rank as a shy being who is too kind for this world. She's simply a doll who doesn't know how to kill, who doesn't know how to say no. This man however, won't take no for an answer.
"I'm not here to serve coffee," she says with pure ice.
"Is that so?"
"Yes. And I'm off duty, too."
"Thought we could have a little chat, you and I."
"Why?"
"You seem like an interesting woman."
He seems pleased with the fact that for some reason, she's still here, that he has her attention. Thinks he's winning her over with some yucky flirting.
"And wearing a red dress like that…" He tsks, as if it's a crime for a woman to wear red. "Red can drive a man crazy, darling."
She understands why she has been invisible to everyone except König up until this point.
Because deep down, she knows if she would carry herself in full, show herself to the world as the woman she truly is, she would instantly attract love, and power, and hunger, and lust.
"I'm going to go now, sir."
"Tell you what. You serve me that coffee and I'll let you go."
She catches sadism in that stare. And to think she had always found Graves to be somewhat… arrogant, perhaps, but not cruel. The man obviously has a Napoleon complex, but he was not supposed to be sadistic.
How wrong she has been.
She knows she could just get out of the situation by filling that mug the bastard can't fill himself because of some stupid need to have a powerplay moment with an innocent little girl who happens to wear red.
But she doesn't want to. König would have ripped this guy's head off by now.
"I'm off duty," she repeats.
Fuck these men who are always looking for a plaything.
Graves rises from the chair. She's both cold and sweaty by the time he has taken a step, two, three.
But men are a bit stupid sometimes.
They think dresses don't have pockets.
When he takes the fourth and last step, with joy-tinged cruelty in his eyes, she flicks the knife out and open, and simply stabs him in the supposed direction of the organ called heart.
It feels thrilling, pure power: to sink that knife there and catch a man – a soldier of all people – unawares.
So this is what it feels like…
The hurt in his stare doesn't necessarily come from pain, but from the realization that he has made a huge miscalculation.
He looks down at the small knife that will be the end of him, then at her, the woman he thought was just a simple, shy cleaner he could bully into submission.
"You fucking–bitch," he gasps. Weakly.
By the time she pulls the knife out and stabs him again, she's somewhere far away. It hits him in the stomach, and he still doesn't do anything about it, and that's the moment she finds pity, and mercy, and horror.
She turns and stumbles, then runs from the room, unsure if the thump on the floor behind her is real or imagined.
"You fucking whore…!"
The shout is real enough though, and she runs, runs, with a sharp little knife in her hand for what seems like an eternity. That flight is a prolonged medieval torture moment that ends in front of König's door.
Her titan is as calm as ever when he opens the door, and tilts his head when he sees she's breathing fast.
"I think I killed Phillip Graves," she informs with eyes wide.
He blinks, then immediately looks at her hand, the knife, the blood. She goes to him, lifts a hand to his shirt in a desperate attempt to find support. There's not even that much blood. She thought killing would be much messier.
König said it would be messy.
"I… He…"
Her hands won't even shake. All her senses are blown wide and sharp, she sees everything, hears everything, but her hands won't shake.
Is she a psychopath?
"I killed Phillip Graves," she repeats, looks at his chest, clutches at the knife, clutches at his shirt.
The door behind her closes, and König takes hold of her shoulders with warm, warm hands.
"Well done, Engel," he says with such joy, such unbound pride that it snaps her back into reality.
Her jaw starts to tremble, her teeth clatter, she raises her eyes to him…
"He… He wanted coffee, and to talk, and he liked my dress, and–"
"Did he touch you?"
He asks it like it's far more important than what she has just done. She has to shuffle through her memory, but she finds no recalling of Graves laying a single finger on her.
"No."
He was about to. Right?
He was. He threatened me–
"Don't shed tears for him," König says as he looks down at her with mesmerized awe and infatuation. "I can promise you he doesn't deserve them."
Then he hugs her, squeezes her and just holds her, and she's still holding on to the murder weapon.
What will everyone say? What will my friends say?
"My little angel is good with a knife," the titan laughs proudly somewhere high above her.
People have killed each other since the dawn of time.
These things happen.
I'm not the first murderer on this planet.
"My poor little… He was a bad man, Engel. I promise you that."
It's not a big deal. He was a killer too.
He could've died in the field…
"I'm going to jail," she whispers on his shirt. She wants to let go of the knife, but fears it might hurt him or her when it falls.
And she remembers she's not dealing with normal people.
"They will kill me for this," she says with distant realization.
"No they won't," he strokes her hair like she's the best pet he has ever had. "I will take the blame. It was my knife, ja?"
She pushes herself away to look at him, then nods slowly. Her jaw just won't stop trembling.
"Good girl," he pulls her against him again, so fondly that it forces out a whimper.
"Mh."
"Come here," he coos while already holding her so impossibly close. He's surprisingly good at this: at comforting her. Or then it simply feels uncommonly good to have someone sturdy to hang on to while her life and identity are falling apart.
"I'm not sure if he's dead," she whispers when the embrace lingers on. König breaks the hug immediately.
"You didn't confirm the kill?"
She must look like a shy cleaner again, because his resolve is stone cold and solid.
"Engel, I will go and finish it. Where is he?"
She tells, because he would find out anyway. He would start a manhunt and cause even more ruckus.
But when his hand reaches the doorknob, when he's already about to go and finish her crime on top of taking the full blame for it, he turns.
"Do I have your permission?"
Her jaw slowly stops trembling, and a soft sweetness spreads through her heart. The elite soldier, the mass murderer, asks for her permission.
She is more than just special…
"Yes," she whispers, and he gives her a curt nod before storming out the door.
And he's not living in the 21st century.
Instead, he walks in the world of gladiators, rages in a blood-drunk arena, lives in a time where killing was the norm. He solves problems with physical force: it's just that simple. There is no complex society, there are no rules other than the rules of the heart and the loins.
Anyone who disrespects her will get the blade, anyone who might take her away from him will make him do whatever is in his power to prevent it.
And he has the ultimate power: the power of violence.
He comes back surprisingly clean: only a tiny speckle of blood on his camos and some vivid-colored grime on his hands.
"Done."
She nods with solemn silence. She's done, too. Done with everything, because everything's gone. No matter how high the sun is, she will walk in darkness from now on.
"I believe you Engel. He swore he didn't touch you."
And God.
She might be special, but a dying enemy's, a man's word is more worth to him than hers. As if she would try to protect Graves from his wrath by lying.
And Graves wasn't even dead…
But he is now. Probably tortured too to get the truth out about not soiling her with his paws.
"Did anyone see you..?"
"No. But they will know it was me."
It's another gift to her. Another murder. And her purity, intact, in exchange for a compliment, a testimony of his character during a lazy coffee break. For a few kisses on his scars of abuse. For letting him fuck her like a beast.
Her gifts are burning tears, soft flesh and tight little cries…
His gifts are cold, black steel, hot, white cum and a stream of crimson blood.
"Thank you…"
"I would do anything for you." He bows his head, a little nod to inform her that he is hers to command. "Anything you want, just ask."
She's at home in hell, filled with guns and knives and a fallen god. She knows he will take her again tonight, just like he has done every night in the past weeks. In every position imaginable, grunting, howling, panting, laughing how sweet she is, asking if she likes what he is doing to her. She has always whispered yes through tears of hot joy.
Sometimes, they come together and their gazes lock, and it feels like drifting into a starless space with him. He strokes her hair and coats her with whispers of love before they fall asleep. They always curl up together in the cover of womblike darkness, with soft little smiles on their faces, safe from all evil.
"Can you keep me safe…?"
It's a sad little question, but she doesn't feel weak. She knows he is lost in her too: especially when she's wearing a dress the color of blood, especially when she looks at him like he's her God.
"Please keep me safe."
He comes to her carefully, answers her summons. She's pulled into a familiar embrace, and she doesn't even think about Graves anymore: she thinks about whether König will take her on the bed that smells of acid sweat or on the wall next to the gun rack.
"Always, Engel. I promise."
She holds the most powerful weapon in her tiny little hand. A dark, fallen titan who has risen from the depths of the earth to pledge himself to her, body and soul, while her innocent little dresses flutter in the wind and make everyone believe she's a victim. But she doesn't feel sorry.
Because it's just like he said.
They belong together, she and him.
🖤 🖤 🖤
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