#iceskater au | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

justoneday-namjoonii · 4 years

Text

Quarters. | 8

☼1 • 2 • 3 • 4 • 5 • 6 • 7 • 8

prompt: Sitting here, patching myself up. Crying over what's left, 'cause without you I ain't shit, but no pressure guess I gotta learn my lesson. Sorry — 6LACK

pairing: Jungkook x reader

warnings/au: dysfunctional relationship with a capital D, family drama, humor(i try), temptations, drug usage, relapsing, hoeing, mentions and accusations of infidelity, jk has baby-fever for two seconds if you squint,, bloody, 18+ for heavy scenes, fluff, angst, this is purely fiction please do not read if you are sensitive or easily triggered boxer!au, iceskater!au.

authors note: omg FINALLY💜🐰 this chapter really took everything I had lol, like always, this part is a little out there, their relationship gets tested and they’re forced to grow. Will edit later. enjoy!

It’s so early in the morning, the sun is just now rising—the beauty does nothing for your anxiety though.

You told Jungkook that he needs to rest, he needs to take it easy and clear his mind before he walks into that hospital. The last thing you need is a stressed Jungkook behind the wheel, he’s way too unpredictable when he’s upset. After a few minutes of going back and forth, he gave up and let you drive him—in his car. This is a privilege. He doesn’t let anyone drive his car, not his best friends, not even you. He says, no one knows how to handle her like I do.

It always makes you laugh when he says that.

Jungkook glances at you as you take a turn at a questionable speed. He’s definitely driving back home.

You look around the crowded parking lot and pull into a visitor's parking space, squeezing between the white lines surprisingly well.

“That was a long drive,” You pull the key out of the ignition and turn your head to look at him, “but we made it.”

Jungkook doesn’t turn to look at you, rather, he takes a deep breath and his eyes shut before he drags his hands down his face. “I’m gonna warn you now, I’m going off on him if he gives me some shit excuse as to why he decided to leave me out of the loop on this.”

“Jungkook, please don’t do that. Stay calm, for your mother's sake and mine, I’m nervous.” You sigh, trying to grasp the fact that you’re about to meet his family for the first time. You open your door and slide out, naturally, you assumed he was doing the same thing. When you drop the keys into your purse and close the door, he still in the passenger's seat, head in his hands.

“Jungkook.” You stomp around the vehicle and open his door. “Come on, we need to go inside,”

He sighs, heavy black boots landing on the pavement when he gets out of the car, stretching his legs in the hugging black jeans. When he closes the door, he bends down to look at himself in the window, hair still a little wet.

“You look good with messy hair, don’t fix it too much,” You smile, trying to lighten the mood, he smiles a little but he’s back to that grave face in just a few seconds. His silver necklace is a nice touch to his outfit you notice, he paired it with his hooped earrings and you think it looks really charming.

You haven’t been to a hospital in a while. Nurses with bright colored scrubs come to and from the nurse's station, visitors pace around the gift shop, hoping to find the perfect for their loved one. When you two get signed in as visitors, your eyes wander to the couple at the sliding doors, the woman is in a wheelchair holding her baby and the man is trying to help in any way possible, the nurse gazes at him fondly. She knows he’s trying hard.

“Here you go, she’s in room 202A,” The nurse hands you the sticky tags to and points you in the right direction. Jungkook breathes in, looking like the antiseptic and sterile environment makes him dizzy.

“Should I get her a gift?” Your eyes follow the family walking out of the gift shop with get well balloons and teddy bears.

“You can, she’d like that,” He follows you into the gift shop and you go straight to the bunnies in the corner. After sorting through the stuffed animals, you pick the little pink one in the back. Now that you see the bunny, it’s only right to get her a balloon and some flowers.

“Hi there,” She cashier greets you, taking your items to ring them up, “great choices.”

“Thanks,” You smile, proud that this random lady approves of your gifts.

It’s not long before you’re leaving the shop to finally meet see her, to finally meet his family. Does Jungkook have her eyes? The cute sun rays at the corner of his eyes when he laughs, does he get that from her? These questions swarm your mind when Jungkook's hand grips the doorknob, just seconds away from opening another part of his world to you.

“Knock, knock,” He opens the door and the brightest smile came to his face when he sees the woman on the bed. He beckons you to follow and you just know you must have the most awkward smile on your face.

“Jungkook! Oh my gosh, I didn’t know you were coming!”

She looks at him like he’s a puppy – as if he’s the epitome of love and innocence.

He runs to give her a hug, eyes squeezing shut, relieved that she’s in one piece and smiling that life-saving smile. “I’m glad you’re okay mom,” He sighs, standing back and reaching for you to shuffle you towards his mother, “this is Y/n, my girlfriend.”

“Hi, it’s nice to meet you,” You smile, holding your gifts out to her, “this is for you, I hope you like it.”

“Aw, thank you, honey,” She takes the bunny with bright eyes and you sit the flowers on the stand beside her bed, “I’m so glad he brought you to meet me. I hate that we’re meeting under these circumstances though.”

“Jooe called me last night, scared me half to death,” Jungkook takes a seat in the recliner beside her and you sit in the little cushioned bench near the window, “are you okay?”

“I’m as good as can be expected, I guess,” She continues to talk to Jungkook and just observe them, admiring their similarities—you note that she looks very young, “I felt terrible yesterday. The doctors told me that I got here right on time, the appendix was badly ruptured, it felt like cramps from hell.”

“Where’s Kev and Jooe?” Jungkook says her husband's name differently than his little sisters.

“She was getting restless, he took her to get something from the cafeteria. Something tells me you’re not too happy with him, and my intuition never lies so what’s the problem?”

“Mom, I got the call that you were in the hospital from Jooe. Why didn’t he call me? Why does she have a phone, by the way? She’s 6.”

“I know, she told me.” She lets out a sigh, knowing where Jungkook is going. “It’s an emergency cellphone app on her tablet, it’s not an actual phone.”

He dismisses the information to return to his original topic. “I shouldn’t have gotten a call that you were in the hospital from her. Kev, your husband, should have let me know.”

“Jungkook, he was stressed out, okay? He was trying to make sure I was okay so his attention was a little divided, don’t be too hard on him.”

“He did it on purpose, he’s always tried to keep me out of the loop when it comes to you. I’m fucking tired of it-”

“Kookie!”

A high-pitched voice squeals from an adorable little girl with two long jet-black pigtails atop her head. She runs from the man once holding her hand to jump into Jungkook’s arms. It’s evident in his mother's eyes that her heart is melting at the sight.

“It’s good to see you too, Jooe,” He giggles, pulling back to get a good look at her, “Hey, I want you to meet someone.”

You squirm anxiously, for some reason wanting her more than anyone else approval.

“She’s really special to me,” When she adjusts to sit in his lap, she finally looks at you. He leans to whisper in her ear, “say hi.” He moves her to fully face you, making both of your eyes go wide at meeting each other.

“Hi,” She shyly waves, back leaning into Jungkook to seek comfort.

“Hi, I’m Y/n,” You wave, “you’re so pretty, you look just like your mom.”

She blushes, hands grabbing at her yellow sun-dress instinctively. “Thank you, you’re really pretty too.” She cracks a bright smile and her attention goes to her mother when she starts asking her about what she ate for breakfast.

“Jungkook, I didn’t think you’d be able to make it,” Kev finally speaks and the sparkle in Jungkook’s eyes fades instantly.

“Well, here I am.” Jungkook shoots back, eyes menacing and dark within a matter of seconds.

“Um, hello,” You stand up to greet who you assume if ‘Kev,’ hand extended and he takes it in a friendly manner, “I’m Y/n, you’re Kevin, right? It’s nice to meet you, I’m Jungkook’s-”

“You must be his better half,” You nod, scooting back to sit down, “a pleasure to meet you, sweetheart.”

A million-dollar pearly smile, business clothes on, hair slicked back like that of a TV-doctors—he seems really kind, you can’t see why Jungkook would have such a problem with him. It’s hard to sit here knowing he’s the reason Jungkook wasn’t invited to his step-brother's wedding. The reason he called you drunk as hell because he was so hurt—this guy did that to him.

“Has the doctor been in to talk to you? I have a call to jump on but I want to be with you to see what she says.”

“Don’t worry about it, honey, take your call, I know you’re pressed for time,” She sighs in relief, “I’m just glad Jungkook is here, I feel better just from seeing his face,” She reaches for his hand and a spark of pride comes to him, “it’s been too long.”

He knows and guilt eats him up for that more than she knows.

“Well, you know Jungkook, he’s got a busy life, doesn't have too much time for stuff like this,” He laughs a little, eyes landing on you for a moment, “I’m sure you get that, don’t you hon?”

He’s looking at you and you turn a little pale. You look at Jungkook, and then open your mouth to utter out something, “Well, um, no I-...”

“Kev, leave the girl alone,” Jungkook’s mom intervenes, noticing how flustered you looked.

“I can’t make time for shit that I don’t even know is happening,” Now it’s Jungkook’s turn to laugh, but not out of genuine amusement, he’s doing it to stay calm, “What do you expect? You don’t tell me shit.”

“All you have to do it ask,” Kevin stands next to his wife, opening up his phone to absentmindedly tap the screen.

“That’s bullshit...” Jungkook let one too many words slip before thinking of the child in his lap who’s more focused on his phone than anything. The two of them make you feel uneasy, it’s like one wrong word from either of them would start a brawl.

“No!” Jooe exclaims, sliding off of Jungkook’s lap, “I left my sweater in the cafeteria! I have to go get it before someone takes it!” Distress befalls her and now the whole room's attention is on her.

“Jooe, I told you to make sure you kept it wrapped around your waist,” Kev doesn’t look like he wants to go but he grudgingly stands to his feet. “Come on,”

“Do you want me to take her? I was going to get coffee anyway, I can help her look for it.” You look at Jooe with a sweet smile.

“Oh, are you sure? I mean, as long as you don’t mind I fine with it,” It’s almost like you answered his prayer because he fell back into a chair with a sigh of relief.

“Of course I don’t mind,” You stand up, holding out your hand, “is it okay if I go with you, Jooe?” She nods, taking your hand without hesitation. Jungkook looks in awe as you seem to already be a favorite of his little sisters—he’s never seen you interact with children, but it warms his heart.

“We’ll be back everyone,”

You wave to the room as you go on a mission to find the missing sweater. As soon as the door closed, Jungkook’s mom smirks at him.

“What? You’re giving me a weird look.”

“She’s so sweet Jungkook, oh my gosh. I’m so glad you brought her, I’ve never met one of your girlfriends before, she must really be something. Look, Kev,” She points to the flowers and the bunny in bed next to her, “she brought me these cute gifts.”

“That’s sweet,” He looks up from his phone, then at Jungkook, “you better hang on to her.”

“That’s what I’m doing,” Jungkook scoffs. “So all l I have to do is ask, you expect me to have to beg for information on my own mother?”

“We live in different city’s and sometimes it’s easy to handle things and let you know after everything's said and done.” He reasons, eyes going to his cellphone in an attempt to exit the conversation peacefully. To both his mother and Kev’s surprise, he leaves it at that—not cussing, not lashing out, he just sinks back into his seat, expression unreadable. Jungkook remembered that you asked him not to lash out, and he’s so tempted to, but he’s gotta keep things under control for you.

You must have made a difference in him because this isn’t the Jungkook they’re used to.

* * *

“What color is it, Jooe?”

You and this bubbly little girl are holding hands and walking into the cafeteria. “Sky blue, it’s my favorite, what if someone took it...” concern coats her tone, it makes you a thousand times more determined to find it.

“Don’t worry, we’ll find it, you’re with a professional sweater detective Jooe,” You give her hand a reassuring squeeze and draw a little smile from her. It only takes a few questions to get her to retrace her steps. She finally finds the table she sat at while her dad ordered her fold and it was right there. It’s just a sweater, but she’s so happy.

”I told you we’d find it,” You’re relieved she found it, now you can get your coffee, “I’m just gonna get some coffee, then we can go back up to the room.” You lead her to stand by you when you walk up to the counter. A protective arm around her shoulders as you order two small lattes. They come out quickly and she begs you to carry Jungkook’s, you’re afraid she’ll drop it, but you give her a chance.

“Okay, but be careful,” She walks right beside you, both hands tight on the disposable cup, you open the door for her to walk in and she beams.

“We found it,” She walks up to Jungkook, handing him the cup, “and we brought you coffee.”

“Thank you guys,” He looks up at you, his eyes sparkling.

“I’ll be right back, I have to make a phone call,” You look to Jungkook to reassure him that everything is okay. But you got a text from your older sister Layla. Call me. She rarely reached out like this so you decided to give her a call, hoping nothing was wrong

“Hello,”

“Hey, Y/n, how are you?”

“I’m fine, what’s wrong? You texted me to call, what’s going on?”

She sighs, “I need a favor,”

“What is it?”

“I need someone to watch Lily, I’m in your part of town and I have to go see her dad.”

“Layla,” You message your temples, “I’m not in town and I don’t know if I can watch a baby right now, I’m with my b-”

“Please Y/n, I can’t call mom, you know how she is with him,”

“Okay, okay,” You cut her off, looking down at your watch to see if you can make it home before 11, “I can get home around 11, bring her by 11:30.”

“Thank you! Thank you, I’ll see you then little sis,” She sounds relieved, and even though this wasn’t apart of your plans, you do feel good about helping her out. You type up a quick message to tell Jungkook that your visit has to be cut short. Hoping he sees it, you walk back into the room and give his family a kind smile.

“I’m sorry to cut the visit short, but I have a little situation that came up with my sister’s baby, so I’m gonna have to go,” Jungkook stands up, sitting Jooe where he once sat with her tablet and promptly kissing her forehead and telling her he’ll see her soon.

“Oh, we understand Y/n, I’m just glad I was able to meet you,” His mom reaches to give you a hug goodbye, she whispers, “take care of him for me.”

“I will,” You notice that Kev had stepped out so you weren’t able to say goodbye to him, and you have a feeling Jungkook is glad.

“I love you mom, call me if anything changes,” His mom kisses his cheek, relishing in the rare affection she gets to show her son.

His family loves him.

When you get to the car, you can see relief overtake his body, knowing his mother is in good health. This time he drives, and now he gets to assist you with your family situation.

“So, what’s up with your sister?”

“She needs me to watch her baby,” You lean against the window, pressing your temples, “she’s having baby-daddy issues, but she won’t say it,”

“Hm,” He nods, knowing how that can be according to some of his friends, “how old is the baby?”

“She’s five months or six months old, something like that, I was supposed to go out to help Rosie pack for her new apartment but I guess I’ll have to get there later,” and you were really looking forward to that.

“Oh, she’s a young baby,”

You can’t help but giggle, “Aren’t they all,”

“Yeah, but I mean like, she still needs her mothers milk and she probably is just- I don’t know, small?” In the midst of him explaining the difference between a baby and a young-baby, your eyes flutter shut and you fall straight to sleep. The gentle hum of the engine lulled you to sleep. When he looked over, a grin came to his face—even thought you fell asleep in the middle of his talking, he loves you.

For some reason, you’re stressed.

“Jungkook, you don’t have to stay,” You told him that a hundred times, telling him he was supposed to be conditioning today but he insisted, “I got this.”

“I don’t have to go until late,” He’s laying on your couch, a black tee-shirt on, showing his beautiful arms and the tattoos that graced them. He’s drawing one for one of Yoongi’s clients tonight. Yoongi has his own tattoo shop, where it smells like weed and you’re sure drug deals happen in the back. You want to go lay with him, but instead, you're in the kitchen trying to clean your stress away on the stainless steel. “I’ll stay for a while, you went with me this morning,”

“Just know that you don’t have to,” You mumble, that’s when you hear the doorbell ring, “she’s here.” When you yank the gloves off, you go to the door and take a breath before opening it.

“Hi, Y/n,” Layla walks right in, giving you a big hug.

“Hey,” You smile, eyes filling with adoration when you see your niece in the car seat, “hi Lily,” You lead Layla to sit the car seat on the couch where Jungkook was waiting to be introduced.

“Layla, Jungkook,” You gesture to him, “Jungkook, Layla.”

“Hi,” He flashes a sweet smile, “nice to meet you.”

“Oh hello, nice to meet you too, “ She nudges your arm, giving you gossiping-girlfriend eyes. “Y/n didn’t tell me you were so handsome,”

“Yeah, well, must’ve slipped my mind,” You laugh, the most in-genuine laugh he’s ever heard, “did you bring her a few changes of clothes? Bottles? Formula?”

“Are you her mom, or am I?” She laughs, handing you the baby bag. “Everything’s in there, she should be hungry in a few minutes.”

“Okay, will you be back to get here tonight? I have plans tonight so-”

“Yeah, before 7,” She’s headed to the front door, “thanks so much for watching her.”

The door closes, and just as quick, Lily starts to cry.

“She’s crying,” Jungkook moves closer to her pink car seat, hesitantly moving her seat to look at her increasingly red face. “do you want me to-”

You rush over to pick her up, “It’s okay Lily,” cradling her against you, “Auntie Y/n is watching you while mommy takes care of some business,” You walk around, rocking her a little, then you remember she’s probably just hungry. His eyes are wide, watching you hold the little girl to cry to calm her

“Jungkook,” He shakes out of his daze and looks at you, “can you warm her a bottle? Just run it under hot water for a minute or so,” You point to the baby bag and take a seat on the couch. He gets up promptly, finding the bottle easily and taking it to the kitchen.

He dries the bottle and brings it to you, “Thanks,” You sit her up, her curly brown hair a little smashed on one side but still cute. When you bring it to her lips, her crying ceases and you breathe in relief, Jungkook sits beside you, leaning on your shoulder and watching the TV.

“Hopefully she’ll nap after this,” Her big brown eyes look from you to Jungkook every few seconds, “look at her hair, it’s so curly,”

“Yeah, it is,” He smiles, looking down at your niece, “she’s adorable,”

It’s not long before she finishes her bottle, you burp her and put her back in the seat so she can nap. Surprisingly, she doesn’t fuss, and you leave her and Jungkook on the couch so you can go to the table to finish the essay that you forgot you had.

He’s awoken by a cry. In his many years with Jooe when she was a baby, he often woke up to cries. He groggily opens his eyes and shoots up to see what was wrong with Lily and to see where you went.

“Hey,” He reaches down the lift her small body into his completely contrasting hands, “it’s okay, don’t cry, shh,” Naturally, he bounces her gently, feeling bad for her inability to express her sorrow, “what’s wrong Lily-” That’s when it hits him, “Oh,” He sighs, “I would cry too.”

With her in one arm, he grabs her baby bag, dragging it across the couch. Once he finds the changing mat, he lays it out and lays her on it. He doesn’t think he’s ever seen a baby turn so red, she looks like she’ll set the house on fire if he doesn’t hurry up.

“I know, I’m sorry,” He takes out the diapers, wipes, and gloves, “I haven’t changed a baby in years, give me a break,”

After dodging her kicks to his hands and relieving her of the dirty diaper, she’s cleaned up and the color is coming back to her face.

“Damn,” He triple-bags the diaper and gloves and takes it to the trash with her in his other arm, “I think I did a pretty good job, what do you think?” He smiles, proud of himself for being an ideal babysitter in his eyes, even though she’s still crying a little bit.

“Where is your aunt?” He drops the bag in the trash and then looks around for you. When he finds you, your head is on your textbook and your computer screen was black, you fell asleep doing work. He’s found you like this many times after skate practice, cramming for assignments that you procrastinated on.

“Let’s let her sleep for a little bit,” Resisting the urge to wake you, opting for taking Lily to the couch so she could chill in her seat. He turns on his game counsel that he left over here and makes himself busy.

Lily was quiet for the most part after he gave her a pacifier and she found a dangling thing on her seat—she’s good now.

Suddenly, you feel paper stick to your face and your eyes fluttered open.

“Jungkook?” You shoot up, wiping your face and looking around. “How long was I asleep?” You quickly walk over to the living room, looking at your boyfriend and your niece having a fine time without you.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to fall asleep,” You sigh, taking a seat between Jungkook and Lily in her seat, “I was trying to write my paper.”

“You’re fine, I changed her and everything,” His eyes are still glued to the TV and you grin.

“Wow, thanks. You’re a good babysitter,” You sigh, dropping your hand into her seat and she grabs one of your fingers, “I guess I should order some takeout, what do you want? Pizza?”

“I wish I could stay baby,” He leans back and sighs, “but I gotta go, Yoongi’s expecting me at the shop, he wants me to finish up a sketch for a client of his.”

“Oh, then I’ll just make something for me,” Your eyes follow him as he gets up, grabbing his keys and scrolling through his phone for a moment, “hopefully Layla will pick her up on time so I can head to Rosie’s,”

“Yeah,” He gently rubs Lily’s little cheek, his hair dangle over her when he leans down to smile at her, “bye Lily, be good for your aunt, okay?”

You giggle. “I didn’t know you were such a softy for babies,”

“She’s cute, kinda makes me want one,” Your expression must’ve looked shocked because he quickly covered himself, “I’m joking, I’m not daddy-material, I can babysit, but my own kid? I don’t think so, we’re both a little too messed up for that,” He just laughs.

“Yeah,” You nervously let out the breath that you unconsciously held. He can’t blame you for your reaction, you’re both young with lives that just don’t work well with stability. And you love Jungkook and he loves you, but jokes like that are merely just that, jokes.

“I’ll see you later,” He leans down to give you a kiss, pressing your lips with a grin.

“Okay,” You withdraw, your smile fading a little but he doesn’t notice. When he leaves, your eyes linger on the door and you swallow.

You have an aversion to a lot of places he goes, but you have a special dislike for Yoongi’s tattoo shop.

“Lily,” You look at her and sigh, “I guess it’s just you and me.” You switch on some random TV show and sit back, you just hope her mom isn’t late this time.

When he pulls up to the shop, his usual parking space in the back being there just as he expected, he sees Yoongi talking to some girl at the back door. She’s a frail little thing, hair bleached as white at humanly possible, mascara heavy even from this distance, and tattoos covering her legs under fishnet-stockings and very short shorts. He watches as Yoongi talks to her, he looks upset, brows furrowed even under his hair covering them.

Her eyes are dark and whatever she’s saying is making Yoongi place his hands over his face. She looks like she might be defending herself. After a few seconds, she shows him her middle finger and storms to her car. Pulling out at an ungodly speed. He kindly flips her off and eyes her until she’s out of sight, that’s Yoongi.

Jungkook finally decides to get out of the car and Yoongi leans against the back door, waiting for him to walk over.

“Hyung,” He grabs his art bag and locks his car, letting it beep twice before leaving it, “sorry I’m a little late,”

“You’re fine,” Yoongi sighs, tired eyes gaining a little bit of life when he sees Jungkook, “I’m sure you saw the shit I just had to deal with.” Yoongi opens the door so they can both head inside the well-kept shop, the door shutting behind them.

“I wasn’t gonna mention it,” But he was admittedly curious, “but who was that,”

“A pain in the ass,” An artist he hired about a month ago, she’s got talent but she’s a complete mess, “she was selling dope out of the shop, drawing junkies back here at all times of the day. I’m not letting her fuck up my business, I had to fire her.”

“That’s tough,” Jungkook nods, clearing his throat when he takes a seat at his normal spot in Yoongi’s backroom slash office. “So, the sketch is rough, I’ll refine it and you can tell me if you want to add anything. Who is it for again?”

“Agh,” Yoongi groans, now deciding to reveal the truth, “I was going to keep it a secret until the last second, but I guess I’ll tell you.”

Jungkook furrows a brow, “Tell me what?”

“It’s for Jimin, he wanted a new tattoo but he wanted the design to be a surprise,” Yoongi shows Jungkook to the area he can sketch at while Yoongi cleans up his needles and wipes off the table, “I told him I’d have it drawn up by my best artist,” He looks at Jungkook, “that’s you.”

“Seriously? In that case, I know exactly how I should finish it, he told me of a tattoo he was looking at not too long ago,” Jungkook smiles, glad he knows the person who’s going to have this tattoo, “it’s small, I imagined it going on the biceps or the ribs maybe? Not sure yet,” He sets up his tools to start finishing the design.

The shop is bustling with clients, artists, like always. Yoongi pretty popular with the underground scene, the punks and rejects seem to gravitate to this place. Including himself. He pops in his earbuds because of the loud conversations going on in the front.

Without him noticing at first, Yoongi slips out the back door.

After an hour or so, Mingyu, one of the artists walks in and Jungkook takes out an earbud to greet him. He’s got more tattoos than Jungkook and his hair is electric blue and he used to drag Jungkook into all types of stupid stuff. He’s been close to puking out his organs on several occasions—they laughed a lot about it but he never smoked with him after that.

“Kook, long time no see,” He leans in the door frame, “I saw you at the match last night, you’re always the talk of the night on Tuesday Night Brawls, congrats on your win.”

“Thanks,” Jungkook pushes his hair back, propping his arm on the desk to look at him, “I didn’t see you,”

“I had some activities to attend to so I had to leave early,” Mingyu’s activities probably entailed a female going to who knows where to do who knows what, “I heard you went to Jimin’s for a little party, any fun stories? I didn’t see many groupies with you guys,”

“Man, I don’t do that shit anymore,” Jungkook goes back to the drawing, “I’m kind of in a relationship,”

“Oh, me too,” He giggles to himself, “but we like to keep it open, it’s not exclusive, ”

“Mine is,” Jungkook affirms, this bias towards one individual catching Mingyu off guard.

“Aw, someones softened up,” Mingyu nods, “then I guess you probably don’t want to go to Milo’s Club, I have a friend there who’ll hook us up if you know what I mean.”

Milo’s is the spot for avid clubbers of any rank, potheads, college kids—anyone and everyone looking for a good time.

“Ah, I don’t know,” Jungkook shrugs, “maybe,”

“Well, some of us are headed over there when we close up shop in about 30 minutes, if you change your mind feel free to join us,”

Tempting.

Going out wouldn’t hurt, you’ll be at your girlfriend's house so he’d be going home alone anyway, he reasons with himself. As long as he doesn’t get carried away, he can indulge a little bit, can’t he? Yeah, he was just going out like he used to, nothing bad about that.

Layla finally came to get Lily and just as soon as she came you went to the grocery store to get a dessert to bring, you were feeling a little peckish. When you knock on the door, you can hear Rosie’s footsteps approach the door.

“Hey girl,” Rosie smiles, pulling you in with a relieved sigh, “oh, you brought food?” She peaks into the bag that you take to the kitchen.

“Yup, cheesecake,” You walk into the apartment and see Yuna, and Harmony here to help as well, “thought it’d be nice to have something indulgent.”

“Thank you Y/n,” Yuna speaks up from her wrapping a vase in bubble-wrap, “Rosie is working us to death, we need a reward.”

“I’m sure she is,” You laugh at Rosie defending herself as you open the cheesecake and take out paper plates and forks, “sorry I’m a little late, I was babysitting for a little bit.”

“Aw,” Harmony speaks from her comfortable spot sprawled on the couch, “who’s baby?”

“My sister’s, she needed to meet with her boyfriend, they had to sort some stuff out,” You put generous portions on each plate and brought them with you to the living room, “he’s being stupid.”

“That sucks,” Rosie looks u from her cheesecake, “is it custody thing?”

“I don’t even know, she won’t say,” You find yourself scooping a piece of cheesecake into your mouth, “Oh, I also met Jungkook’s family this morning.”

“How did that go?”

“It was fine,” You sigh, “his little sister called him last night, told him their mom’s appendix had ruptured, and you know him he got super worried and I did too. He doesn’t have a good relationship with his stepdad, they don’t see eye-to-eye on anything. But I think it went okay, his mom and his little sister seemed to like me, the stepdad too.”

“That’s good, I know you were worried about him letting you in on his family life,”

“Yeah, he even helped me babysit for a little while,” You smile at the thought, “it was really cute.”

“Oh my gosh,” Yuna giggles, “tattooed, earrings, leather boots, and ripped jeans Jungkook with a baby? How cute,” Everyone makes a mental picture of it and their hearts melt, “he seems like the type now that I think about it.”

“I fell asleep and when I woke up, he had changed her and they were on the couch together,” You smile at the thought, “it was sweet. He was talking about how cute she was, he said she made him want one.”

“You’re lucky,” Harmony looks up from her phone, “my ex couldn’t take care of a cactus, let alone a baby.”

“It’s silly, but there’s this thing I have where-...Well, you guys know the stuff I went through with my birth mom, she was a mess. And when she tried to get me back when I was in elementary school, it was a nightmare. Jungkook didn’t have it easy growing up either, it just makes sense that he’d say we’re both too messed up for a kid,” You sigh, “we’re both scarred by our parents. But I still don’t know why he’d say that...”

The three of them give you an odd look, “Say what? That you’re both too messed up for a kid?”

“Yeah,” You frown “why would he say he wanted on if that’s how he felt about us?”

“He was just being funny and obviously flirting with you,” Rosie shakes her head, “most girls would find that charming,”

“He said he was joking,” You reveal, “but damn, I’m not that messed up...”

“You mean you two have never talked about kids before, not even out of fun as a couple?”

“Well,” You rub your arm, embarrassed that they all think your reaction is ridiculous, “no...Is that a normal thing?”

You’re being ridiculous—is that what they all thought?

“Uh, yeah, Y/n,” Yuna takes everyone's empty plates to the kitchen, “chill, he was just being a guy. Maybe you can talk to him about it-”

“No, it’s not that deep,” You reason, “he went to Yoongi’s shop tonight, where all his up-to-no-good friends are...The people there do a lot of crazy stuff, there’s always some drama. That’s what I hear at least, I’ve never even been there.”

“Yeah,” Rosie chimes in, “but You trust Jungkook,” you assumed it was a question so you nod, “so chill out, and wrap these spatulas. I have to get half of this done before I pick my parents up from the airport in the morning, my mom will go neat-freak if she’s the one helping me.” She laughs, handing you the rags to wrap it in.

You should trust him.

So why don’t you?

The music is so loud, it almost hurts—but it’s so familiar, he knows the blaring speakers well. All the smells, the people wearing close to nothing just to get a fleeting moment of attention. He was once a happy giver of that attention. Hell, it was happily given to him at one point. As soon as they walked in, Mingyu was whisked away by a beautiful girl and he dragged Jungkook with him.

“Aren’t you glad you joined us?”

Mingyu simpers, throwing back his second shot before his lips were pulled to the girl's mouth. Her lips were so pink, they were big too and he wondered if they were real. Jungkook just watched, his shot still untouched until he felt the need to down it like his life depended on it and walk-off. The other guys who decided to join were off at the bar and Yoongi went off to a personal room.

Jungkook was standing up against a corner, arms crossed and eyes surveying the room. Unbeknownst to him, there was a girl watching him from the dance floor. She was wearing a skin-tight sequin-covered dress that the lights hit, her eyes were set on a target and she was planning her attack.

After a few minutes, Mingyu signals Jungkook to follow him into one of the personal rooms, where the magic happens. The purple lights from the ceiling illuminate the room in the dreamiest ways, the leather booths surrounding the room are shiny and comfortable when they sit.

“San,” Mingyu greets him, taking a seat with that girl still under his arm, “what’d you have for me tonight?”

“The usual. I didn’t know you were bringing a friend,” He looks at Jungkook, surprised to see him here without Jimin, “good to see you, Jungkook. What’ll you be having?”

“Depends,” Jungkook takes a seat across from Mingyu, “I might pass.”

“Oh, come on,” Mingyu removes his hand from the girl's thigh to grab his wallet, tossing him a joint and a lighter, “here, take this and then see how you feel. As for me, San, I’ll take the usual, one for my lady-friend too.”

Jungkook stares down at the thing in his lap, taking it in his hand and using his other to light it. This is harmless, he mentally counsels himself with a deep inhale and slow exhale.

It’s not long before his head is floating and his body is slowly dissipating into thin air. His eyes are half-lidded and he feels good, relaxed, but deep inside there’s a quiet longing—he pushes it down in favor of another puff. Through blurred eyes, he watches Mingyu and the girl take something, he doesn’t know what.

“Now, you know what you want?” San speaks up, standing as if he just came back from somewhere. “It’s on the house, call it a favor for an old friend.”

Jungkook laughs a little bit, seeing that he’s already feeling like he did in high school, sneaking off into clubs to do this. “Give me something mild, I can’t go too crazy,”

“I know just the thing,” While San is going through a case, Jungkook is leaning on his knees, watching to make sure whatever he’s about to take isn’t some heavy-hitter kind of stuff. He pops the pill and sits back to let it take full effect. 30 minutes until euphoria, that’s what he used to say in his mind before consuming this stuff because that’s how long it normally took for hin to really feel it.

Mingyu whispers something to the girl, she tugs down her dress and scurries out of the room with a giddy smile.

He’s teetering on the edge. So close, too close. The joint he had is still sending vapors in the air from the ashtray, he picks it up and finishes it.

Warm, and a little dazed, his eyes follow Mingyu who’s giving San a wad of cash before the drug dealer runs off. Mingyu’s little friend came back but Jungkook doesn’t register the people she brought with her, he’s high in the clouds right now while scrolling through his phone, wondering what you’re doing. Something smells really good all of a sudden, like flowers soaked in spices. He looks up from the phone and there’s a woman standing in front of him, he furrows his brows.

“Hi,” She’s standing in front of him, that same girl with the sequin dress and long brown hair, “I’m Kendall, you’re Jungkook right?”

“Yeah,” He stares her down and she takes a seat next to him.

“I hear you’re a boxer,” She’s giving him her full attention, “I bet you’re good,” She puts her hand on his thigh, feeling nothing but hard muscle and she shivers when his legs spread out comfortably.

“I’m okay,” His bland answer doesn’t please her, she places her hand on his shoulders to feel how loose they've become.

“Mh, I can tell you’re more than okay,” She giggles, face getting closer to his. It’s evident that he took something, his pupils are huge and his hand's borderline tremble when she gets close. “your arms look so strong, and your tattoos are so-”

“What do you want?” He deadpans, his body feeling jittery and warm from the effects of the crushed pill.

“Well, I thought we could have a good time,” She boldly moves to sit on his lap, her thighs warm but not right, not yours. “you look like you could use one.”

“I- I can’t,” He pulls her arms from around his neck and pushes her off, causing her to frown.

“What? You have a girlfriend or something?”

“Yeah,” He leans back once again, legs spread and now irritated that you’re not here for him to sink his finger in, “I’m not fucking that up.”

“You have a wife and kids too?” She bites back.

He rubs the back of his neck, he’s sweating. “No, but-”

“Then I don’t see a problem,” She kisses him without warning and he doesn’t react quick enough to push her away. There’s a smirk on her face when she pulls back and his doe-eyes lose a bit of their sparkle, “no ring, no rules. That’s how I see it.”

“Don’t,” He pushes his hair back, mind reeling with the need to cuff himself to something so he can’t move. He wipes his mouth, “I can’t mess up what I have because of some whore-”

“Call me what you will,” She cups his jaw with a smile, “but you can’t take lover’s speed without a lover, loosen up.”

* * *

“I think we’re all finished up for tonight girls, thanks for helping me out,” It’s been a few hours and you guys were more focused on the reality TV show than parking the silverware, but you got it done.

“No problem, Ro,” You look down at your phone, it’s getting late.

“Are you sleeping over, Y/n?”

“Um, I can, it is getting kind of late,” You got up to go to the bathroom and the three of them went straight to their phones.

From the couch, Yuna’s eyes go wide and she shows Rosie her phone. Harmony grabs the phone so she can see why they’re looking like they’ve seen a ghost, “Oh my God, is that-” She whispers, “Is that Jungkook?...Does Y/n know-”

“Do I know what?” You walk out of the bathroom, brows furrowing when you hear them trying to be hush-hush. “Why are you guys looking like that?”

“Have you seen Sean’s story?”

“No,” You frown, “what happened?” You quickly grab Yuna’s phone to see what she’s talking about. At first, you don’t know what you’re looking at until you see it.

It’s a group photo and Jungkook’s in the back, he’s in the back with some girl smothering his face with her own.

“When was this posted?” You ask calmly, biting your lip to keep from throwing the phone out of the window

“20 minutes ago,” Yuna answers, “at Milo’s.”

“Okay,” You give the phone back to Yuna and you grab your keys.

“Y/n, what are you doing?”

“I’m going to that club.”

Rosie stands up with you, “Hold up, we’re going with you.” You tie your converse and the three of them follow you on your hunt.

Don’t do this to me Jungkook,

don’t do this to me.

* * *

“My bitch told me you threw her out, Min, what the fuck?”

“Your bitch was selling coke in my shop, I had to let her go,” Yoongi stands up, “you told me she was good for a job but she was bringing crackheads to my shop.”

“You told me you’d give her a job, you’re telling me you just fired her? Why didn’t you give her a chance? You used to sell-”

“Yeah, I used to. But I don’t anymore.” Yoongi leaves the room.

Meanwhile, Jungkook’s on the other side of the club with a loud group of guys, downing shots like he’s back in college.

“Jungkook,” Yoongi grabs his arm, and his pupils are blown, his cheeks are red, “I’m heading out, can you drive yourself home?”

“Yeah, I’ll be okay,” Jungkook gives him a reassuring look, “I’m good, Hyung, I’m so good.”

“What did you take?” Yoongi looks at him for a moment, not trusting Jungkook to go anywhere himself, “Hey, call yourself a driver, okay?” Yoongi pats his back before leaving the stuffy place.

When he walks out the front door, he could have sworn he saw you pass him with a group of girls. If that’s true, then Jungkook’s in for a world of trouble.

This environment is foreign to you, you’ve been in it before but it’s always been too much, too loud. Your outfit doesn’t help you blend in at all, your gray converse, shorts, and t-shirt are quite contrasting to what the other girls are wearing. Your body is shaking, the people who are shooting you weird looks don’t matter to you, you need to see him.

“There he is,” Harmony points to the corner where Jungkook is leaned up against, he looks like a train-wreck. His hair is so disheveled and he looks jittery, anxious, but he’s smiling. How did he manage to do that to himself in just a few hours, “if you need back up, we’ll be over here.”

You nod, putting your best foot forward to walk a clear path towards him.

Only when you tap his shoulder from behind does he turn around to look at you. The high, the clouds are evaporating and he’s starting to feel the sweat on his brow, I’m sweating? For a moment he thinks you’re a hallucination, there’s no way you’re actually here.

He reaches out to touch you but you slap his hand away. That’s definitely you.

“Y/n,” He rubs the back of his neck, “what are you doing here?”

“Is this what you do when you leave? You come here to cheat on me and do drugs,” You bite your lip, when he just stares at you with dark eyes, “answer me.”

“What’re you talking about?-” You shove your phone into his chest.

“What do you call that, Jungkook? She’s all over you!” Tears start to prick at your eyes but you push it down, you try to. “What are you trying to do to me?”

He stares down at the phone, his chest tingling and heart aching at the sight. It was taken moments before he got up and left, she got on him but he willed himself to leave her. He was out of it, couldn’t really remember any details. “I took something, and I’m not-...” He gives you back your phone, dragging his hands down his face. “I wouldn’t cheat on you, I didn’t-”

“Don’t fucking lie to me!” You yell but the music is so loud, it sounds like you’re speaking at a normal volume. “After everything I’ve done for you, after everything we’ve been through, I can’t believe you would do this to me,”

“Hey, hey, what’s going on?” Some guy with electric blue hair barges into your conversation. “What’s wrong, baby girl?”

You look at him, judging by his looks alone and the way he physically sides with Jungkook, you can piece together that they know each other.

“Um, was I talking to you?” You snap, looking at him as if he just grew a second head.

“No, but you look like you’re giving my friend here a hard time. I’d appreciate it if you calmed the fuck down, no one likes a-”

“And I’d appreciate it if you’d mind your own business. I’m his girlfriend, who the fuck are you?”

Mingyu cracks a nervous smile, “Oh shit,” He looks at Jungkook who’s finding it hard to stay still, “so, you’re the exclusive. I’m sorry, I may have set him up with a playmate for the night, but can you blame me? You obviously weren’t gonna join him,” He shrugs, “he just wanted to have a good time.”

“Y/n, I took ecstasy, I smoked a little bit, ok? That’s it, I didn’t do anything with that girl,” Jungkook glares at Mingyu, ”she kept coming on to me but it didn’t go anywhere-”

“You’re high, you don’t know where it went.” You turn his face to see red lipstick spotting his skin, “Look at your neck, it went somewhere...”

His hand comes goes there and he remembers the forced kiss before he ran out of the private room.

“Y/n, please it’s not what it looks like,” He let’s out a grown of frustration, grabbing your wrist, “let’s talk about this somewhere else.”

“No,” You pull away, “don’t touch me,” He grabs continues to pull you towards the direction of the bathroom, “Let go! Let go of me-”

You jerk away and mistakenly bump into a fast-walking individual, he was trying to get Jungkook. Oops.

“Tell Yoongi that’s what it costs,” that’s what you hear and then the guy runs off.

When you hear a scream, it seems like the whole club stops and people start backing away.

Why are they screaming?

Only when you feel the wetness dripping down your knee do you realize why they were all looking at you. You stumble, placing your hand on your thigh when Rosie comes running up to you with tears in her eyes, her hands are trembling. “Y/n, oh my God-”

When you look up, Jungkook is shouting so loud that you can hear the strain in his voice and he’s running. There’s blood all over your leg, your leg is shaking.

“We need to put pressure,” One of the girls takes off her flannel and ties it around your leg, “give me a belt, somebody!”

Some random guy gives her a belt and she wraps it around your leg tight. “Y/n, we’ll take you to the emergency room down the road, we need to get you out of here,” Rosie tries to help you to your feet but you wince, “can you stand? Harmony, help me!”

“Yeah, I think I can- Ouch!” You cry-out when they pull you up a little too fast, “wait, stop! That hurts-”

When they finish, Yuna and Harmony pull your arms to wrap around their shoulders, they look like their struggling. Jungkook suddenly breaks through the crowd of people, hair sweaty and eyes frantically scanning over you. He wants to throw up, but he can’t right now.

“Give her to me,” Jungkook extends out his arms so he can take you from the girls but Rosie guards you from him with her whole body, “what the fuck? Move,”

“Haven’t you done enough?” She frowns. “We can handle this, why don’t you-”

“Come off it! I’m not about to let you three fucking drag her out of here like this, she’s gonna bleed by the time you get to the fucking door!” He moves Rosie out of the way, “Let me carry her.” Neither of the girls argue when he grabs you from them and lifts you into his arms.

In a matter of seconds, you’re outside and the cool air makes you cringe, holding Jungkook’s shirt tighter in your fist. “You okay?” He whispers, glancing down at you when you give a weak nod.

Yoongi was outside at his car talking and his heart sinks into his stomach when he sees your bloodied leg in Jungkook’s arms. Among the other people leaving the club, you and Jungkook were the last people he thought he’d see.

“What the fuck happened in there?”

“Some guy was trying to stab me but she got in the way,” Jungkook explains in a panicked tone, “he said to tell you this is what it costs,” When Rosie opens his back seat door, he eases you to lay on the leather seats and gets back there with you.

“We’re taking her to the emergency room,” Rosie answers before closing the front-seats door and cranking the car up.

“Son of a bitch,” Yoongi pulls out his keys and gets in his car. That’s all he says before pulling out of the parking way faster than he should have.

Jungkook is sitting where your legs are so he can keep it propped up, “You’ll be okay,” He pants, the effects of the drug still running it’s course in his system, “does it hurt a lot?”

You nod, stomach-turning at the smell of your own blood. You mumble, “I feel like I’m gonna throw up...”

He looks down at his hands, tattoos now colored red from your blood. “Me too...”

Jungkook and Rosie brought you inside while the girls waited in the car.

“Excuse me,” Rosie goes to the front desk and Jungkook goes is walking not far behind her, “my friend was just stabbed, does she need to sign in or something? She’s bleeding a lot-”

As soon as Jungkook came into their line of vision, the sight of your bloodied leg kicks them into an urgency.

“Bring her here,” A woman with lilac scrubs says something to a few people before she’s walking Jungkook to the back and directing him to a room, “sit her there, miss, do you feel dizzy at all?”

Jungkook hesitantly lays you on the little bed and two more people come into the room, both dressed in scrubs—he’s asked to step back.

“Just a little,” You bite your lip when they start removing what was covering your wound, it looked as bad as it felt, or maybe it’s just really bloody. They start taking wiping your thigh of the blood that covered it. You look away, not wanting to see the damage.

“Sir?” A woman finally gets his attention after the third time calling him, when he looks at her, his eyes are a dead give away. That, and the smell of marijuana and liquor on him. “Have you taken anything tonight? You don’t look so good,”

He disregards her question with a question of his own, “...Wh- where’s the bathroom?”

“Down the hall to your left, but-”

He runs out of the room before she can say anymore and he passes Rosie on his way there.

He bursts inside and locks himself in a stall. Immediately, he falls to his knees and painfully expels whatever he had consumed tonight into the toilet.

His throat burns and his heart is pounding.

This was always the worst part.

“So, how long will I need the crutches?” You look at your now-useless leg. “I’m an ice skater, I have competitions to prepare for, and-”

“Two weeks at the very least, but I would recommend no strenuous activity for a month at the least. With how close the wound was to the artery, you’re lucky it’s not longer.” The nurse smiles, probably thinking she was lightening the mood.

It’s just and the nurse, Rosie ran to the restroom and Jungkook hasn’t come back since he brought you here.

“So,” Rosie walks inside, “how long are you on the crutches?”

“Two weeks,” You frown, staring at them from the corner of your eyes, “this would happen to me, wouldn’t it?”

“It could have been anybody,” Rosie sighs, “I’m just glad you’re okay.”

“Miss, you have a visitor by the name of Min Yoongi, do you want to see him?”

You nod

After a few moments, she opens the door and Yoongi walks in.

“Y/n,” Yoongi comes to your side, guilt eating him up that he was the cause for this. “I’m sorry this shit had to happen to you, I don’t-”

“It’s not you’re fault, okay? Don’t beat yourself up about it, I shouldn’t have been there...”

“Did Jungkook leave?”

“He ran to the bathroom earlier, I haven’t seen him since,” Rosie says that with a bite in her tone, and soon enough he’s walking inside the room, “that’s probably for the best, he’s the last person you need right now.”

Get it together.

He cupped water in his hands, swished it in his mouth and spit it out. When his eyes meet the mirror, he wanted to slam into it, shatter into a thousand pieces for bearing his face. He does his best to wipe the blood from his arms and hands with soap water and a napkin. He also wipes the lipstick from his neck, scrubbing at it unnecessarily hard until its gone. Nausea has faded enough for him to stand up and face you. But the thought alone makes him want to disappear. He can’t stay in this bathroom forever, even if that’s what his mind is telling him to do.

“Miss,” the door opens again, “The man from earlier, he said he’s your boyfriend, he wants to see you, are you alright with that?” you hesitate for a moment when you look at Rosie who’s sitting in the chair next to you, you nod.

The woman leaves for a moment and Jungkook walks in, he searches for you as soon as he walks in. He doesn’t acknowledge Yoongi or Rosie. He walks to your bedside and looks at the white bandage wrapped around your thigh.

“What did they say?” He’s not as pale as he was but his eyes are a little red. “Are you okay?”

“She’ll be on crutches for two weeks, but she can’t skate for at least a month,” She turns to Jungkook, “the wound was close to the artery, an inch difference and she would’ve bled out, no thanks to you.”

Silence befalls the room and even though she said that to make Jungkook wake up, Yoongi is the one who feels so bad about it. “I have to go, guys,” Yoongi suddenly speaks up, “feel better, Y/n, I’m sorry about all of this,” It’s not his fault, you remind him of that before he leaves.

“We just need your insurance,” The nurse comes back with a wheelchair within seconds, “the pharmacy you’d like your medicine sent to and you’re all set to go,” She helps you into the chair and rolls you out.

As they check you out, Rosie looks down at her phone, it’s almost two in the morning. You notice she looks tired as you hand them your insurance card, and she still has to pick up her parents in the morning, you don’t feel right keeping her here.

“Ro, go home,” You gently grasp her hand, “you have to pick up your parents in the morning, it’s getting late.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m fine, thank you for everything, tell the girls I’ll call in the morning,” You know it takes everything in her not to stay but she knows it’s late and even if you’re both pissed at him, he can at least take you home. You get her to agree and you’re left with Jungkook and the nurse as they take you to his car.

“Are you okay, hon?” The nurse asks softly as Jungkook watches her help you into the passengers seat. You know what she means by that. You know how this probably looks to her, it doesn’t look like you’re in a good situation. But you reassure her that he’s going to take you home.

When he gets in the driver's seat and the nurse is back inside the ER, you can feel him staring at you. He swallows, hands gripping the wheel incredibly tight, “Look, I’m sorry this happened, I-”

“Take me home,” You cut him off, looking out of the window with the crutches at your side, “just take me home...”

The drive is quiet. Painfully quiet for him. He pulls into his normal parking space and when he gets out, he comes to your side.

“Let me help you,”

That’s the first thing he says to you, hand extended as if you’d actually take it. You’re not skilled with crutches, you shouldn’t have been so persistent on getting and going to the door without his help, but you were.

“I don’t want your help,” You mumble, hobbling inside after he opened the door with his key. He flips on the light and you sit on the couch to try to kick your shoes off, “you should go home,”

“Y/n, please,” He closes the door behind him, “I know what you saw, I know it looked bad but I didn’t cheat on you.”

“Yeah, but you let some slut put her hands on you,” You forget trying to take off your shoes and you use your crutches to try to get to your room, “y’know, if you wanted to break up with me you could’ve just said it. If I’m not enough for you, you should have just told me.”

“You know you’re enough for me, don’t even talk like that. I don’t want to break up, why the fuck would I want that?” He follows you into your bedroom, easily catching up because you can’t get anywhere fast now.

“I wasn’t thinking straight, but my mind was clear enough to know we didn’t have sex,” He’s in your face, “I’m sorry that it looked that way, okay? Is that what you want to hear?”

“No, don’t tell me what you think I want to hear,” You sit on your bed, again trying to kick-off your shoes but failing miserably, “just leave me alone.”

“You can’t even take your own fucking shoes off, you need help,“ He kneels down and you don’t fight when he takes them off for you, “don’t you trust me?”

You scoff, grabbing your crutches and trekking to your bathroom to get away from him, “Why should I,” You attempt to close the door but he stands in the doorway, “let go of the door.”

“No,” He’s getting upset now, you can feel it in the way each word leaves his mouth like a curse, “stop walking away! I fucking love you, that’s why you should trust me.”

“Wow, with a reason like that,” You let out a sarcastic laugh, standing in your bathrooms doorway. “I guess I should forget everything that happened tonight, huh?”

He rubs his temples, the headaches he’s had from an hour ago now acting up. “You know what? If you didn’t have trust issues, you could see that I’m telling you the truth, I swear to god I didn’t do anything.”

“I know I have trust issues,” You’re sick of standing in the bathroom, “after all the times I’ve been screwed over, you’ve given me plenty of reasons not to trust people.” You move past him, bumping into his shoulder.

“Hey,” He tries to grab you but hobble away from him and towards your bed, “would you stop walking away?! I’m trying to talk to you!” When he sees that you’re close enough to your bed, he takes the crutches from you and sits them on the floor behind him.

“What the hell?-” Your mouth hangs open in shock as you grapple to hold on to him so you don’t fall. “Why would you do that!”

“That was the only way I could stop you from walking away.” He towers above you, height and large frame reminding you that he can overpower you easily. “Don’t you see I’m being honest? Tell me why you’re acting like this.”

“You know I was hurt in my last relationship. Do I really have to spell it out for you? I dated for months before I realized I was being played. I couldn’t see what was happening right in front of my face, do you know how that felt? I felt so stupid,” You squeeze his arms, “I swore I’d never let anyone make me feel that way again.”

He breathes in and out, trying not to fall apart at your teary confession, he chants in his mind, don’t cry, don’t cry.

“I can’t go through that again, I love you...” You hold on to him, leg throbbing and tears falling down your cheeks in single drops, “Don’t make me look stupid for loving you.”

That hurt.

“I won’t,” he wishes he had stayed home—he wishes he would have stayed with you. “I won’t, I promise I won’t.”

You gasp when his hands cup your face and he kisses you, open mouth sealing over yours without warning. You fall victim to this every time, you try to listen to the voice in your head that tells you to push him away, but how could you? You grab at his wrists to keep your self grounded and he holds you tighter, making you breathe nothing but him. His mouth goes bone dry and he feels sweat dripping down his back, he’s burning up and his heart is beating out of his chest.

“Jungkook,” You manage to breathe out, and you plop down on the bed, “you’re sweating like crazy.”

“I’m sorry, I feel like I’m gonna pass out,” Suddenly, he rips off his shirt and tosses it somewhere, now revealing the sheen of sweat that’s been under his shirt.

“Are you okay?...What you took, have you ever taken it before?...” Worry shakes your voice.

“Yeah, this used to happen sometimes, give me a second,” He disappears into the bathroom and you hear the water turn on. Somehow, you managed to stumble over to the bathroom with the help of the wall. Jungkook is standing at the shower, the water on cold as he dunks his upper body under it with a groan of relief.

You watch as he grabs a towel from the rack and dries his face and hair. You watch as he dries the water off his body, face still red but he looks better.

“I’m sorry, this is one of the reasons I stopped using that shit,” He sits the towel on the counter, heavy ids landing on your frame in the doorway. For the first time, he sees the bandage on your leg in his right mind and it pains him.

Noticing that you weren’t using the crutches he threw away earlier, he comes to your aid. “Your leg, don’t stand with it like that, you need to have it propped up,” For the second time tonight, he picks you up and carries you to you out of the bathroom. “It must hurt.”

“It does,” You hesitantly unwrap your arms from his neck and he lays you down, “it hurts a lot.” With expectant eyes, you watch him circle around your bed to get to your drawers. He pulls out a shirt and some shorts, sitting them besides you.

“I’m sorry,” He mutters, handing you the shirt so you can put it on while he helps replace your bloodied ones, “I wish he would have stabbed me, I fucking deserved it, not you.” He’s absolutely right.

His hand rests on the bandage and he looks up at you, eyes so tired. Reaching over you, he takes one of your pillows and props it under your leg, making sure it's elevated at a comfortable angle. He sits on the edge of the bed, one arm across your body, his eyes shutting when he presses his forehead to yours. Desperately, he kisses you again. His damp hair dangles on your forehead and his necklace drapes over your neck the more he leans down, its cool on your skin. His warm body engulfs you, his sheer heaviness making you weak. He has a special ability to surround your senses and drown you in his energy, and you sink happily.

“I’m sorry,” He whispers, “I hate that we always end up like this, I shouldn’t put us through this...” Brushing your hair away from your face, he leans, in his nose a tinge red and his eyes teary, “but when I’m with you-...When I have you, I don’t have to see myself anymore and it feels right. I hate myself without...” Tears stream down his cheeks and a few drop on your cheeks. His chest heaves against you when he shakily breathes in. He drops his head in your chest like a child and starts to cry.

“Jungkook,” You run your fingers through his hair and your eyes get misty when a pained whine leaves his mouth.

“I-” he hiccups against your t-shirt. “I’m sorry that this is what it cost to love me, but I’m not shit without you. I’m nothing with you...”

Sitting here, patching myself up, crying over what's left, 'cause without you I ain't shit, but no pressure. Guess I gotta learn my lesson.

#Jungkook boxer!au #jungkook scenarios #jungkook fluff #jungkook angst #jungkook smut #jungkook fanfic #bts smut #bts fluff #bts angst #bts boxer!au #jungkook x you #jungkook x reader #iceskater!au #quarters #bts imagines #bts scenarios

315 notes · View notes