#idk why but i put some broadway references in here | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

stardustinyoureyes · 8 years ago

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Defying Sanity

Bakura and Marik are all ready to travel to Egypt to get their revenge against the Pharaoh, but a minor hiccup in their plans forces them to make some money. Luckily for them, a new reality show is looking for people to audition, and the prize is $250,000. Based off of their personalities in YGOTAS. Thiefshipping. The song I used is ‘Never Gonna Give You Up’, and as you can probably infer, it’s a comedy. Sorta fluffy, though, because I can never write stories with sad endings.

AO3 link: http://archiveofourown.org/works/10430289

“IT’S TIME TO TRYYYY DEFYING GRAVITY! I THINK I’LL TRYYYY DEFYING GRAVITY!” Marik’s off-key warbling filters through the door of the hotel bathroom, along with the ‘pitter-patter’ of a shower running.

“Marik, for the love of Ra, shut up!” Bakura shouts, exasperated.

“I’M THROUGH ACCEPTING LIMITS, CAUSE SOMEONE SAYS THEY’RE SO!” Marik’s singing continues.

Bakura groans and covers his head with a thin hotel pillow. For the past 12 hours, he had been subjected to this torture. Ever since they had left Domino for Egypt to kill the Pharaoh, Marik had been screaming in Bakura’s ear. Not even stopping at a hotel for a night could silence him.

“’Kura, do you like my new top?!” Bakura removes the pillow from his face, realizing the ‘pitter-patter’ of the shower has stopped. Marik stands before him, gesturing towards his purple top. Bakura can’t help but notice it’s the exact same shade as his eyes.

“Yes, it’s very nice.” Bakura responds in a tone usually reserved for talking to 5-year-olds.

“Did you hear that, Rodrick?” Marik says to the Millennium Rod in his hand. “’Kura said I look pretty!”

“I didn’t say that!” Bakura snaps.

“You implied it!” Marik snaps back, then flounces off to comb his sopping wet hair in front of the smudged mirror in the bathroom.

Bakura sighs, partly at Marik’s childishness, but mainly at himself for putting up with it. For some reason, no matter what foolish thing Marik did, Bakura always stuck with him. He couldn’t count the number of times he had been injured or almost killed or driven to insanity by irritation, but he couldn’t bring himself to leave. Maybe because he knew that, if he left, Marik couldn’t possibly survive. It’d be like abandoning a week-old puppy.

Marik comes back into the room. “Did you brush your teeth?”

“Yes.”

“No you didn’t, Bakura! Don’t lie to me!”

“Marik, shut up and go to bed.”

“Mouth health is a very serious matter!”

“I don’t care.”

“That’s what you say to everything!”

“I don’t care.”

“You’re always so mean to me!”

“Guess what?

“You don’t care?”

“Good job, now you’re starting to get it.” Bakura lies down and pulls the covers over himself, turning away. Marik stomps his foot in frustration and whines. Seeing that Bakura isn’t going to give him any more attention, he walks across the room, turns off the lights, and gets into the other twin bed. Bakura can hear the covers rustling as Marik gets comfortable. After a few minutes, the rustling is replaced by snoring.

Bakura rolls onto his back and looks up at the stained ceiling. He’d never admit it, but he felt some comfort knowing Marik was only a few feet away. Bakura wasn’t scared of the dark- he was a thief, after all- but sometimes he got lonely.

No. Not lonely. Bakura thinks sharply. ‘Lonely’ is for losers like that midget Yugi Moto, or Bakura’s wimpy host whose name he couldn’t remember. No, Bakura didn’t get lonely. Bored, that’s the word. Not lonely. Sometimes it was nice to have someone to keep you from getting bored. And whatever word you used to describe Marik, (and Bakura could think of a few choice ones) he certainly wasn’t boring.

* * *

The next morning, Bakura awakes to a note from Marik on the counter of the room’s kitchenette:

“Kitty-

Gone to get breakfast

-Supreme ruler and overlord of the world, Marik Sebastian Ishtar”

Bakura scowls at his hated nickname, crumpling up the note. He throws it away and walks over to his suitcase. Today they were flying out to Egypt from the airport in Tokyo, and Bakura wanted to doublecheck what time the flight left. After all, villains always have to be punctual.

Bakura sifts through his clothes (5 pairs of the exact same outfit) and chip bags Marik snuck into his suitcase. Where are the tickets? He picks up the suitcase and dumps its contents onto the ground. No tickets. Maybe they’re in Marik’s suitcase. He opens up the pink Hello Kitty suitcase laying on Marik’s bed. Purple tops, Millennium Rod polish (available at a store near you), pictures of the Pharaoh with drawn-on devil horns, and 5 cans of hairspray. No tickets.

“Where the devil are they?” Bakura mutters to himself. He starts opening the nightstand drawers, hoping that he put them in there and just forgot about it.

“OH. EM. GEE. YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE THE LINE AT MICKY D’S!” Marik loudly declares, walking into the room with a grease-covered McDonald’s bag. “THERE WERE LIKE 6 PEOPLE AHEAD OF ME AND THIS LITTLE OLD LADY INSISTED ON PAYING IN EXACT CHANGE AND THIS OTHER GUY-”

“Marik, where are our plane tickets?” Bakura interrupts.

“-TOOK LIKE 25 FRIGGIN YEARS TO MAKE UP HIS MIND, AND- what was that?”

“Where. Are. Our. Tickets?” Bakura says slowly, his patience wearing thin.

“What tickets?” Marik asks unconcernedly, pulling a hash brown out of the bag.

“The tickets we need to get on the plane for Egypt!”

“Oh, you mean the rectangles with a bunch of numbers on them made from the fancy paper?”

Bakura rolls his eyes. “Yes, the fancy paper rectangles. Where are they?”

“I ate them.” Marik answers casually.

Bakura is stunned into silence for a moment. “You…ate…them?”

“Yeah.”

“Marik, why the bloody hell would you do that?!”

“I was hungry!” Marik says defensively.

“So let me get this straight,” Bakura says slowly. “You went into my suitcase, got out the tickets we need in order to fly to Egypt, and ate them.”

“That’s what I just said, isn’t it?”

“Completely disregarding,” Bakura continues. “The 15 different chips bags that you insisted on putting into my suitcase so you could eat them in case you got hungry.”

“Aren’t you British? Why did you say ‘chips’ instead of ‘crisps’?”

“MARIK, DO YOU REALIZE WHAT THIS MEANS?”

“Yeah, it means that any sort of consistent characterization has already gone out the window.”

“WE ARE STUCK HERE. IN THIS MANGY HOTEL. WE CAN’T GO TO EGYPT. OUR PLAN IS GOING TO FAIL. ALL BECAUSE YOU DECIDED TO ACT LIKE A BLOODY MORON AND EAT OUR TICKETS.”

“Well, it wasn’t really a conscious decision,” Marik clarifies. “After all, you’re not you when you’re hungry.”

“THIS IS NOT A BLOODY SNICKERS COMMERCIAL! THIS IS REAL LIFE!”

“Oh, you worry too much,” Marik waves a hand, disregarding Bakura’s totally justified concern. “Here, have an Egg McMuffin.”

Bakura grabs Marik’s proffered McMuffin and flings it across the room. “Those tickets were over $1000 each! We don’t have the money to buy more!”

“Don’t worry, I’ll just use Rodrick to brainwash a Steve into giving us money.” Marik waves his Rod.

“And how many Steves have you seen around here?”

Marik thinks for a minute. “Ten?”

“No.”

“Twenty?”

“You’re getting colder.”

“Fifty?”

“None, Marik. We haven’t seen a single Steve since we left Domino.”

“Well, there are other ways of getting money. We could sell our blood.”

“4Kids can’t show blood! They would just censor it!”

“Oh, yeah.” Marik strokes his chin, thinking. “What if we start a GoFundMe? I’m sure there are plenty of people who would donate their hard-earned money to help 2 psychopathic strangers murder someone who already died thousands of years ago.”

“Marik, you are an absolute fool.”

“But am I a pretty fool?” Marik asks, batting his eyelashes. Bakura responds by yanking open the door to the room, stomping out, and slamming it shut. “Jeez, jealous much?” Marik picks up the TV remote laying on the stand.

He’s never coming back, a dark voice whispers in the back of Marik’s mind. It’s a voice he’s very familiar with. He tries to shut it out the way he always does, by distracting himself with some superficial diversion. “Ooh! Golden Girls! I love me some Betty White!”

Halfway through his third episode, an ad comes on the TV that catches his eye.

“Are you the most interesting person you know?”

“I so totally am!” Marik shouts at the screen.

“Do you want everyone to see how great you are?”

“You know it!”

“Do you want to win $250,000 dollars?”

“Holy shit, that’s a lot of purple tops!”

“Then come audition for Applause, the newest reality show that’s sweeping the nation! Every team gets 5 minutes to do whatever they want, and whoever gets the least amount of applause is eliminated. Whoever’s left after 8 weeks wins $250,000, bragging rights, and the adoration of millions!”

“I WANT THAT!” Marik jumps up in excitement.

“If all that sounds good to you, come to 124 Conch Street this Friday to see if you’ve got what it takes!”

“AAAAHHHHH!” Marik starts hopping around the room, screeching like a banshee.

The door to the room opens and Bakura comes back in. “Marik, I-” he pauses as he sees Marik jumping up and down on the bed. “Um, what is happening?”

Marik stops jumping and lands on his butt, bouncing slightly from the impact. “’Kura! I’ve found a solution to our problem!”

Bakura looks at him warily. “What is it?”

“There’s this gameshow that’s having auditions, and the winners get $250,000! That would cover the cost of tickets.”

“But I…” Bakura hesitates. He looks at Marik, who’s almost wiggling, eyes shining with eagerness. He sighs. I’m going to regret this. “All right, Marik. Let’s win some money.”

* * *

A couple days later, Bakura sits on an uncomfortable plastic seat in a darkened auditorium. 3 judges are sitting at a table in front of him, watching Marik, who is singing on the stage.

“Don’t worry, you don’t even have to come on stage! My singing is so amazing it’ll be good enough to get both of us on the show!” Marik had said the day before.

Singing? Is that what they’re calling it nowadays? Bakura had thought snidely, but he didn’t argue. He had no desire to perform in front of anyone, now or ever, and if he could get out of this audition, he wasn’t going to say anything.

So now he was sitting in this pathetic excuse for a seat, drumming his fingers impatiently on the armrest and suffering through what he had already endured for hours.

“HELLO, MY NAME IS MARIK ISHTAR, AND I WOULD LIKE TO SHARE WITH YOU THE MOST AMAZING BOOK!” Marik flings his arms out passionately, accidentally letting go of the Rod. It flies up and hits a spotlight, shattering its glass and causing shards to cascade onto the stage.

Marik doesn’t notice.

“YOU SIMPLY WON’T BELIEVE HOW MUCH THIS-”

One of the judges waves his hand, cutting Marik off. “Um, you can stop now. We’ve heard enough.”

“That’s for damn sure.” The judge next to him mutters.

“Goody!” Marik claps. “So when does filming start?”

The judges exchange a look. “Oh, uh, we still have some people who have to audition. We’ll be giving information to the people we chose tomorrow. So you can go.”

“See you all on set!” Marik walks off the stage, oblivious to the judges giving each other another look. “Come on, Kitty, let’s go get lunch.”

“Oh, I’ll be out in a moment. I dropped one of my contacts.” Bakura lies smoothly.

“Hmm, I didn’t know you wore contacts.” Marik pauses. “Or is Ryou the one who wears contacts? For that matter, are you in Ryou’s body, or do you have your own? Because if this story takes place after the show’s canon, you should be dead. But if-”

“Marik, stop breaking the fourth wall and go find someplace to eat.” Bakura cuts in. He waits for Marik to leave the auditorium, then walks over and stands in front of the judges.

The judge on the left looks up. “Can we help you?”

“Actually, you can.” Bakura pulls out the Millennium Ring from under his shirt. “Now, first I’m going to ask you a question, on the off-chance that you all are completely deaf: Are you going to let Marik and me on the show?”

“Fuck, no!” The judge on the right exclaims vehemently.

Bakura aims the Ring at the judge’s face. “Wrong answer.”

“What do you-” Flames erupt from the prongs of the Ring and start scorching the judge’s face. “AAHHHH! OH MY GOD, IT BURNS! IT BURNS! THIS HURTS EVEN MORE THAN WHEN THEY KILLED OFF DOBY IN HARRY POTTER!”

Bakura lowers the Ring and the flames vanish, leaving the judge sobbing with a scarlet-red face. “I’ll ask again. Are you going to let us on the show?”

The other 2 judges look at each other in horror. “Yes, yes, of course. Whatever you want.”

“Excellent.” Bakura walks out of the auditorium, pausing at the door. “Oh, and if you think listening to Marik for 2 minutes is bad, try doing it for 12. Bloody. Hours.” With that, he walks out, the door clanging shut behind him.

“Well, I was going to say that his burning you face off wasn’t justified, but now I can see it totally was.” The judge on the left remarks.

The judge in the middle nods. “Yeah, I think that British guy is the real victim here.”

* * *

The next morning, Bakura is awoken by the sound of Marik shrieking loudly.

“EEEEEEEE! Kura, look, we got in!” Bakura opens his eyes and sees Marik standing in front of him, already dressed, waving a stapled packet in his face. “They sent this to the hotel an hour ago!”

Bakura can’t help but smile a little at Marik’s ecstasy. “How unexpected.”

“What are you talking about, my singing was awesome!” Marik responds. “I totally expected to be chosen!” He flounces off to the kitchenette and starts making a ‘Marik special’ (yogurt slathered onto a piece of toast with French fries on top) “Oh, and we need to practice for next week, Bakura. I picked a great song for us to do!”

Bakura groans and pulls his pillow over his face.

* * *

The next week, Bakura trails behind Marik, who is marching around the set of Applause like he owns the place. Groups of people are scattered about, practicing for their time on-screen.

“This is going to be so friggin’ great!” Marik exclaims.

“Except for the fact that we don’t even know what we’re going to do yet, and we’re on in half an hour.”

“Kura, we’re doing that gymnastics routine, remember?”

“We most certainly are not-”

“But the routine is so good!”

“I don’t bloody care, I am not going to-”

Their bickering is stopped as they both come to a halt in front of an interviewer who is talking to another contestant- one who looks very familiar…

“So, Mr. Necrophades, would you like to give us a hint about what you’ll be doing with your 5 minutes?” the interviewer asks.

“Gladly! I’ll be DESTROYING THE WORLD!” the contestant replies.

“ZORC?!” Bakura blurts out.

Zorc turns and sees Bakura staring at him in shock. “Hi, Bakura!” Zorc replies, giving him a cheerful wave. Then he sees Marik and his face clouds over. “Oh, is this the villain you replaced me with?”

Bakura tries to reassure him by saying “Zorc, no one could replace you!” but he’s cut off by Marik.

“DAMN STRAIGHT I’m the villain he replaced you with! And now we’re going to beat your lame-ass ‘destroying the world’ thing with our friggin’ AWESOME gymnastics routine!”

“We’ll just see about that!” Zorc says, but his attempt at being macho falls apart when his voice cracks.

“Zorc, are…are you okay?” Bakura asks.

“I’m fine!” Zorc answers. He wipes his eyes discreetly. “Um, my allergies are acting up. I must go!” He runs away, sniffling.

“Wow, and you think I’m ridiculous!” Marik remarks.

Bakura sighs. “Marik, I used to be very close to Zorc. I would appreciate it if you didn’t try to antagonize him.”

Marik doesn’t hear him. “Ooh! Look! There’s a giant starfish!” He runs over to the starfish, only to find that it’s Yugi Moto. “Wait, this isn’t a giant starfish, it’s a midget anime protagonist!”

“Wait, is that Marik Ishtar?” Yugi asks a blond guy with a vacant expression standing next to him.

“Marik? Bakura? Wha are youse doin heah?” Joey Wheeler asks with an excessively Brooklyn accent.

“We’re competing, duh! What are you two doing for your routine?” Marik answers.

“We’re going to play a children’s card game!” Yugi says.

Bakura raises his eyebrows. “You do realize you only have five minutes, right?”

“Shit! I thought we had five hours!”

“Yuge, wha are we gonna do?” Joey asks.

“Lose to us, that’s what you’re going to do!” Marik says gleefully.

Just then, a crew member appears. “Yugi Moto and Joey Wheeler? It’s your turn.”

“Aw man!” Joey and Yugi follow the cast member onto the stage.

“Well, that’s one less group to worry about.” Bakura remarks. “Everyone knows children’s card games are the least interesting thing in the world.”

“Ain’t that the truth!” Marik agrees. “Who would ever want to watch a TV show about card games?”

* * *

Bakura leans against the wall impatiently, arms crossed, as yet another group goes on stage. “Marik, are we seriously going to do the routine?”

“Uh, heck yeah!” Marik says, clicking his heels together in excitement. Bakura silently admires the side view of Marik’s profile. He’s quite attractive when he isn’t spouting his regular gibberish, Bakura thinks to himself. Then he realizes what he just thought and shakes his head to drive the thought away.

The crew member from before walks into the room. “Marik Ishtar and…Kitty?” she calls out.

Any affection Bakura had felt a moment ago completely vanishes. “Marik! I cannot believe you told them my name is-”

“EEEEEEEE!” Marik shrieks drown out Bakura’s protests. “Let’s go, Kura!”

The two of them follow the crew member onto the stage. The curtains are drawn and it is so dark Bakura can barely make out Marik’s outline. “Good luck!” the crew member whispers to them before disappearing into the wings. Marik and Bakura stand side-by-side, waiting for the curtains to open.

The first notes of “Never Gonna Give You Up” ring out through the loudspeakers. Bakura takes a deep breath and mentally prepares himself. To his surprise, Marik reaches over and gives his hand a short squeeze right as the curtains fly open. Bakura looks down in shock and opens his mouth to say something, but Marik has already started moonwalking to the funky 80’s beat. Bakura clumsily follows suit.

“IIIIIIIII, just wanna tell you how I’m feeling!” What AM I feeling? Bakura wonders. What even ARE feelings? Why am I thinking about this? “NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP! NEVER GONNA LET YOU DOWN!” Bakura and Marik do side-by-side somersaults. Even after he’s right-side up again, Bakura’s head still feels like it’s spinning.

“NEVER GONNA RUN AROUND AND, DESERT YOU!” Marik and Bakura start leapfrogging across the stage. Bakura knows that they must look like total idiots, but he’s too distracted to care about that.

“Your heart’s been aching, but, you’re too shyyyy to say it!” When they came up with the routine, this was the part where Marik lifted Bakura up to do a spin with him. But Bakura’s mind was still reeling from the hand squeeze, so when Marik grabbed him around the waist, Bakura automatically jumps back and ends up falling off the stage.

“Damn it!” Bakura yells as he bangs his head on the thin carpeting that provides no cushion against the cement floor beneath.

“No!” Marik looks around frantically, trying to figure out what to do. “Erm, this is part of the routine!” he says to the audience. He thinks for a second, then strikes a pose like an Olympic diver.

Bakura sits up, his head throbbing. “What are you-” his question is answered when Marik dives off the stage and lands on top of Bakura, knocking the air out of both of them. “GET OFF!” Bakura shoves Marik off, and Marik rolls over. “What the bloody hell was that for?!”

“I didn’t mean to land on you!” Marik says defensively as Rick Astley continues pledging his undying love in an iconic 80’s anthem. “I panicked and couldn’t aim right!”

“Why did you dive off the stage to begin with?”

“I don’t know! It seemed like a good idea at the time!”

“How could that possibly seem like a good idea?!” Bakura hisses as he rubs the back of his aching head.

“I wanted to make it look like it all was part of the routine!”

“Yes, because me falling off the stage definitely looked like part of the routine!”

“Well, I needed to do something!”

“And you thought jumping off the stage and landing on top of me was the best course of action?”

“I’m sorry, okay! It’s hard for me to think straight around you!”

Bakura pauses, taken aback. “…What?”

Just then, the buzzer goes off, signaling that their time has ended. They both look up in surprise, having almost forgotten that they were in a competition. The audience erupts into laughter and cheers, surprising them even more.

“Are they…cheering for us?” Bakura asks as the two of them awkwardly get up off the floor.

The announcer walks on stage, clapping his hands. “That was Marik Ishtar and Kitty with their amazing comedy routine! Let’s see what the next group has planned for us!” The audience cheers some more as a pair of crew members guide Bakura and Marik out into the hall.

“Wow, the audience really liked you two!” One of the crew members remark as they push open a set of double doors.

“We’ll see who’s eliminated in about half an hour, but I have a feeling you guys won’t have to worry about that for this week.” The other crew member says. They lead Marik and Bakura to the exit, then walk back to the set.

Bakura turns to Marik, speechless. I don’t know whether to laugh my ass off or punch him in the face. “That was…the absolute worst…shit show…I have ever seen.”

Marik grins, completely oblivious to what Bakura just said. “See, I told you it would be friggin’ awesome!”

* * *

A couple hours later, Marik sits on the edge of his bed, reading a copy of the National Enquirer, except this story is in Japan so it’s whatever trashy tabloid they have there. Bakura is sleeping in the other bed. As soon as they got back to their hotel room, Bakura had claimed that he needed a nap to recover from the day’s events.

Marik felt a pang of guilt as he remembered that he had probably hurt Bakura when he dived off the stage. He hadn’t planned on doing that, he just…. well, actually, he never really planned on doing anything. He was the exact opposite of Bakura, who insisted on always having a plan. He was even willing to wait thousands of years to get his revenge on the Pharaoh in order to ensure his plan was perfect. Unlike Marik, who was 16 and couldn’t imagine another month without bringing justice to the Pharaoh.

Marik throws his tabloid to the side and sighs. He couldn’t for the life of him figure out why Bakura chose to stay with him. Granted, he didn’t spend a lot of time thinking about it, but that was because he was sure that there was no reason. In the deep, dark recesses of his mind he was certain that Bakura was only putting up with him for entertainment purposes, and as soon as he started getting bored he would hit the highway.

Bakura rolls over in his sleep and nestles his head into his pillow. Marik watches him for a few minutes. Without his usual scowl, Bakura looks a lot nicer, even peaceful. He really does look like a kitten now, Marik can’t help but think. He feels an urge to reach out and tousle Bakura’s hair, but he restrains himself. If only he had restrained himself earlier today. Why did I squeeze his hand? Marik thinks, mentally kicking himself. I shouldn’t have done it. I don’t want to make things weird. I can’t ruin this relationship.

Tapping Rodrick against his thigh, Marik decides to get his act together. Maybe if I start acting serious, Bakura won’t get sick of me, and he won’t leave. Picking his tabloid back up, he makes a resolution: No more impulsivity. No more singing. And no more eating plane tickets.

* * *

Over the next few weeks, Bakura can’t help but notice a difference in Marik. Instead of being his usual excitable, bubbly, annoying self, he seems more reserved. Almost…sad.

Did I hurt his feelings? Bakura wonders as they wait for their turn on the week’s episode of Applause. But I didn’t do anything! He glances at Marik out of the corner of his eye. Maybe that’s the problem, a voice in his head says.

Bakura shakes his head and exhales sharply. You know what, who cares? Not me. I have better things to do than worry about Marik’s delicate little feelings getting hurt.

“Are you ready?” Marik asks, interrupting Bakura’s thought.

“Yes.” He replies.

“Good.” An awkward silence ensues. Bakura almost misses Marik’s endless chatter. Ask him what’s wrong, the voice in the back of his head says.

Shut up, Bakura responds, then realizes that he’s telling himself to shut up. I’m going mad, that’s it. That’s why I’m actually caring about Marik. That’s the only reason.

* * *

Their magic show goes off without a hitch, Marik using Rodrick and Bakura using the Ring to hypnotize people. Just like their past few acts, it lacks the personality of their gymnastics routine, but still gets them enough applause to make it to the next week.

Once again, two crew members escort them outside. “Congrats! You guys have almost made it to the finals!” one of them says.

“Thanks.” Marik replies simply.

“Can’t wait to see the acts next week,” the other one says. “I think you guys have a real shot.”

Bakura and Marik wait in the hallway to hear the results. Bakura simultaneously feels like he needs to say something and like saying anything would just make it more awkward. So instead, he compromises by opening his mouth every few minutes, hesitating, and shutting it again.

Marik seems unbothered by the silence, not noticing Bakura’s extreme discomfort. Finally, the TV screen on the wall flickers to life and the announce appears on stage.

“You’re watching Applause, and it’s down to the wire! Three groups remain. $250,000 up for grabs. And one question-”

The audience chants along with him. “WHO! WILL! WIN!”

“The results are in, and the groups going on to the finals are…” he pauses from drama, then shouts “THE KAIBA BROTHERS AND MARIK ISHTAR AND KITTY!” the audience goes wild as Bakura sighs with relief, not even caring about being called Kitty. “This means that Zorc Necrophades, you are going home!”

“NOOOO!” A shout is heard from down the hall. Bakura looks over and sees Zorc running out of the building, sobbing.

“Well, we made it to the finals.” Marik remarks emotionlessly.

“Yeah,” Bakura says, feeling a pang for Zorc. He seems really upset, he thinks, then scolds himself for being such a sap. First Marik, now Zorc. Next thing you know, you’re going to start caring about Ryou! (jk no one cares about Ryou)

Marik turns toward the door. “I guess we should head back to the hotel.”

“Okay.” Bakura follows dutifully behind Marik as he opens the door and steps outside. Zorc sits on the ground next to a trashcan, sniffling. Marik walks towards their obligatory anime motorcycles, completely ignoring Zorc, but Bakura pauses. “Um, Marik? I think maybe I should talk to Zorc. You know, to try and cheer him up a little.”

Marik stops walking but doesn’t turn around. “Sure, whatever.” Bakura starts heading towards Zorc, but before he’s out of earshot he hears Marik mutter “Might as well just go and stay with Zorc.”

Bakura turns back around and glares at Marik’s back. “And what is that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing.”

Bakura glowers, finally feeling fed-up with Marik’s recent passive-aggressiveness. “Well, it must mean something, that’s why you said it.”

Marik spins around, a scowl on his face. “Fine! It’s just that obviously, you care more about Zorc than you do about me, so you might as well stay with him!”

That’s not true! Bakura thinks, but the words get jumbled up on their way from his brain to his mouth so he ends up saying “Marik, you’re a bloody idiot.”

“Yeah, you’ve made that clear.” With his face contorted in anger, Marik looks older, more mature. Just a few weeks ago, Bakura would’ve given anything for Marik to stop being so immature, but now he just wants to go back to how things were before.

But it’s too late for that.

“Well, we wouldn’t even be here right now if you hadn’t eaten our tickets!” Bakura snarls.

“At least I care enough to try and fix things when I mess up! At least I give half a shit about other people!”

“Do you want a bloody medal?” Bakura asks sarcastically.

The old Marik would’ve probably thought he was being serious and said yes, but this new Marik just clenches his hand into a fist and explodes. “No, I don’t! What I want is for you to admit that you don’t care about anyone but yourself. That you use people and throw them aside when you’re done. I would’ve followed you to the ends of the Earth, but you wouldn’t even follow me down the street if you thought there was half a chance of a better option.”

Bakura stands there, mouth hanging open, too shocked at this show of emotion to respond. Marik doesn’t wait for his answer. He jabs his thumb in the direction of Zorc. “Go ahead, prove me right. Go with Zorc.” He says, almost daring Bakura.

“I-” Bakura starts to say, but Marik has his jaw set the way he always does when he makes up his mind.

“I said go,” he insists. “You’re going to leave sooner or later, so you might as well do it now.”

Bakura stands there for a moment, wanting to say something but also bristling at what Marik said. Marik stares at him, his chest rising and sinking rapidly from his barely-controlled anger. Bakura’s mind races, trying to decide what he do. He wants to say something to make things go back to how they were before, but he also wants to never see Marik again, but he also doesn’t want to prove Marik right.

In the end, his pride wins out. Bakura grits his teeth and walks over to Zorc.

“Bakura?” Zorc says in confusion, lifting his head.

“Hey, Zorc,” Bakura resists the urge to turn around and see Marik’s reaction. “Sorry you got kicked off the show.”

“I can’t believe I lost!” Zorc starts crying again. Bakura sighs mentally.

“Listen, I was thinking. How would you like to help me destroy the Pharaoh? It could be just like old times.” Bakura offers.

Zorc’s face scrunches up in confusion. “I thought you found a new villain!”

Bakura’s face is stone-like, showing no emotion. “It didn’t work out. So is your answer a yes or a no?”

Zorc wipes his eyes. “Yes!”

“Great.” Bakura thinks a moment, realizing something. “Wait, you’re a dragon, right?”

“Actually, I’m an evil demon with horns and bat wings and-”

“Okay, yeah, so you’re another one of the Godforsaken, nightmarish creatures from a children’s card game,” Bakura interrupts. “But you have wings, so you can fly, right?” Zorc nods. “Could you fly me to Egypt so we can destroy the Pharaoh?”

“Yay!” Zorc jumps up and claps his hands in excitement. “I love destroying things!”

“I know you do,” Bakura mutters. Zorc kneels as Bakura climbs onto his back. With a mighty roar, Zorc takes off. Bakura looks down as the distance between him and the ground grows. He catches a glimpse of Marik looking up at him without any emotion before he can no longer make out anything on the ground. Bakura squares his shoulder and looks forward, determined to not waste any more time thinking about Marik.

As the wind rushes by his ears, blowing his hair back, one last memory of Marik comes back. It’s of him singing a line from that song in the shower, way back before everything went to shit.

And if I’m flying solo,

At least I’m flying free.

* * *

Zorc crash lands a few hours later in the middle of Egypt, causing Bakura to roll off his back and faceplant into a pile of sand. He lifts his head up, coughing up silt, and takes in his surroundings. Thanks to the heart of the cards and extremely lazy plot writing, they had managed to go back in time to either 3,000 years ago or 5,000 years ago, depending on whether you believe 4Kids’ lies or not.

Bakura stands up, brushing the sand off his knees. He looks straight ahead and sees a giant palace. “There it is, Zorc.”

“Denny’s? Are we getting pancakes?” Zorc asks.

“No! The Pharaoh’s palace.” Bakura feels a pang as he thinks about how Marik probably would’ve asked a stupid question like that. He grits his teeth and sets off toward the palace. Zorc follows him, making little idiotic comments about their surroundings.

“Look, there are some oranges for sale! I love oranges! Ooh, a cat! Hey, that person’s lying on the ground. Aww, they’re giving him a blanket! Wait, why are they covering his face with it?”

“Because he’s dead,” Bakura answers, trying not to think about how Zorc’s childlike ignorance is exactly like someone else’s.

You really have a type, he thinks to himself. People who are stupid and act half their age. He sees Zorc’s strange character design and corrects himself. Okay, maybe ‘people’ is the wrong word. Things that are stupid and act half their age.

They tramp through the sand for a while, walking past all the poverty and disease. Finally, they reach the entrance to the palace.

“Halt!” a guard standing to the left of the entrance declares. “Who goes th-”

“Zorc!” Bakura calls. Zorc opens his mouth and lets loose a jet of fire that burns the guard into a pile of ashes. The guard on the right stares in horror. “This is bloody convenient,” Bakura remarks.

They walk into through the palace, Zorc blasting anyone who even looks at them. Reaching the throne room, Bakura flings the door open. Everyone in the room turns and stares at them.

Atem lets out a heavy sigh. “Greaaaaat, this guy again!”

Bakura steps forward. “I have come to bring you to justice, Pharaoh!”

“You say that, like, every day, but you never do.” Atem points out.

“Well, this time is different!” Bakura shoots back.

“Yeah, sure, whatever. Are you at least going to tell me what the hell I did?” Atem asks. “I mean, besides being ten times more handsome than you. That I will take full blame for.”

“You are most certainly not-” Bakura shakes his head. Stay focused, you’re so close! “You know what you did!

“No, I don’t.

“Yes, you do!”

“No, I really don’t.”

“Yes, you do!”

“Dude, it took me thousands of years to remember my damn name, I don’t remember what I did to some random guy who somehow has a British accent despite being born in Ancient Egypt.”

“You destroyed my village to make the Millennium Items!”

Atem blinks. “No, that was my father.”

“Yeah, right!”

“It really was.” Mahad chimes in.

“Yeah, he’s telling the truth.” Shada confirms.

“Oh.” Bakura sucks his teeth. “Well, this is awkward.”

“Yeah, it is.” Atem agrees.

Bakura thinks for a second. “Well, you’re his son, so I might as well kill you. I mean, I came all the way to Ancient Egypt, I deserve to kill someone.”

“Uh, Seto’s right here, he’ll be glad to sacrifice himself for his pharaoh.”

“No, I won’t.”

“Seto, don’t be a little bitch. I’m too beautiful to die.”

“You already died!”

Bakura cuts in. “It wasn’t his father who massacred everyone I love!”

“It actually was.” Atem says. The court nods and murmur in assent.

“Okay, fine, I’ll just kill everyone here!” Bakura raises the Ring, preparing to finally, finally get his revenge.

“WAIT!” Atem raises his hand dramatically. “Sure, he destroyed your town. BUT! He didn’t destroy everyone you love.”

“Whatchu talking ‘bout, Pharoah?” Bakura asks, still holding the Ring aloft.

“I’m talking about Marik.”

Bakura looks like Atem just slapped him. “What? You- No- I don’t love Marik!”

“Don’t you?” Atem asks knowingly.

“Urgh…This has nothing to do with you or your father!” Bakura yells.

“Oh, I think it does. You see, if he had never made the Millennium Items, your soul would’ve never been put in the Ring. You never would’ve lived 5,000 years from now-”

“3,000, your majesty.” Shimon corrects.

“Yeah, whatever. Anyway, you never would’ve met Marik. And you never would’ve fallen in love.”

Bakura stands there, stunned. It almost like he’s flying again, as he can practically hear the air whooshing by his ears as his world turns upside down. He stares at Atem, an easy target, but…he doesn’t want to kill him. For the first time in forever, he doesn’t want revenge. And if something as crazy as him forgiving the Pharaoh can happen, then is it really that much of a stretch to believe that he could fall in love with Marik?

“I…” Bakura starts. He takes a deep breath and says something he never thought he would ever say. “Thank you, Atem. For helping me realize the truth.”

Atem smiles and nods. “Go to him, Bakura.”

Bakura’s heart starts pounding as he realizes what he must do. “Zorc! We need to go back!” He turns and runs out of the palace, Zorc following him, confused.

“Ha! Can you believe that loser fell for that bullshit?” Atem snorts. “He’s probably going to start using Kuriboh and giving speeches about friendship.”

* * *

Due to complications from traveling through time and for the sake of drama, Bakura and Zorc make it back to modern times the same day as the Applause finals.

“Zorc, I’m sorry, but I have to go to Marik.” Bakura says, sliding off of Zorc’s back.

“Are we still going to destroy the world later?” Zorc asks hopefully.

“I don’t-” Bakura pauses and decides to throw Zorc a bone. “Sure, Zorc.”

“Goody!” Zorc claps as Bakura sprints into the building. He can hear the announcer as he races through the hall.

“Today’s the day everyone’s been waiting for: the Applause finals! It all comes down to this- The Kaiba brothers versus Marik Ishtar and Kit-” the announcer pauses as a crew member whispers something in his ear. “Er, just Marik Ishtar.” He clears his throat. “Anyway, without further ado, let’s get started!”

The audience roars as Bakura bursts into the room. He spots a serious-looking Marik walking onstage, holding a microphone. Bakura looks around as the opening notes of a song starts. Seeing some steps leading to backstage, Bakura heads towards them. Marik starts singing.

“Don’t breathe too deep, don’t think all day…”

Backstage, Bakura impatiently waits for his eyes to adjust to the darkness. Looking around frantically, he finally spots a microphone. He grabs it just as he hears Marik launch into the chorus. Marik has sung this song so often that Bakura unintentionally memorized it. He waits right behind the curtain for a moment, heart pounding, as he waits for the second verse to start.

“…You’re what you own!”

Bakura flings open the curtain and raises the microphone to his mouth. “The filmmaker cannot see!”

Marik looks over, eyes widening in shock, but he manages to continue with the next line. “And the songwriter cannot hear…”

Bakura walks towards him, singing the next part. Marik turns and faces him as they perform a clichéd romantic duet. “For once, the shadows gave way to liiiight…for once, I didn’t disengaaaage!”

Marik faces the audience during the last chorus, arms flung open wide as he sings with his old passion. Bakura smiles and turns toward the audience too. “You’re not aloooone… I’m not alooooone!”

The song finishes, but there still is a little bit of time before their five minutes are up. Bakura takes a deep breath and lifts the microphone back up to his mouth. His palms are so sweaty that he has to grip the microphone with both hands, lest he drop it. “Marik…there’s something I need to tell you.”

Marik turns and looks at him, wary. The audience all lean forward in their chairs, eager to hear whatever it is. Bakura closes his eyes for a second, gathers his courage, then opens them. “Marik…I love you.”

A collective gasp is heard just as the buzzer goes off. The crowd reaches a frenzy, people shouting and hugging each other and dabbing at their eyes from the beauty of it all. Marik stares at Bakura in shock for a moment, and then a smile slowly spreads its way across his face. He engulfs Bakura in a great bear hug. Bakura, heart still racing, lifts his arms and hugs Marik back. Even though he had never hugged Marik before, it felt…right. It felt like home. And not home like the village that had been destroyed. It felt like a home that would last forever.

* * *

An hour later, Bakura and Marik are at a club for the show’s afterparty.

“I can’t believe we fucking lost,” Marik says, taking a swig from his drink.

“Yeah, apparently Seto Kaiba flinging fistfuls of cash to the audience is a bigger crowd-pleaser than a heartfelt confession of love.” Bakura remarks.

Marik looks down. “Bakura…did you say what you said just because you thought it would make us win?”

Bakura touches his arm. “No, I meant it. I didn’t care about winning.”

Marik looks up again. “But what about the money? What about getting our revenge?”

Bakura swirls his drink around. “Yeah, about that…maybe we should hold off on our whole revenge plan. Besides, the money isn’t an issue. Remember when you first told me you ate our tickets, and I left for a couple of hours?”

“Yeah.” Marik nods.

“Well, I went and mugged a couple people and got a few thousand then. They call me the Thief King for a reason.”

“Wait, why didn’t you tell me then? Why did you agree to go on the show?”

Now Bakura looks down, embarrassed. “You seemed so excited about it. I couldn’t tell you no.”

Marik grins widely. “Bakura! You’re such a softy!”

Bakura’s head snaps up. “I am not!” he protests, offended. He opens his mouth to tell Marik how he is the exact opposite of a softy, thankyouverymuch, when he hears the start of yet another song that’s on regular rotation in Marik’s repertoire. “Marik. Did you go to a club and request a bloody Broadway song?”

“Yep!” Marik smiles.

“You are…”

“A bloody idiot?”

“Yes. But at least you’re my bloody idiot.”

Marik laughs. “Bakura, I love you.” He says simply, catching Bakura off-guard.

“Oh, uh, well, thanks…”

“This is the part where you’re supposed to say it back.”

“I already said it!”

“You can say it again.”

“Why don’t you say it again?”

“I just said it!”

“Well, so did I.”

“Well, at least I’m not British!”

“Well, at least I didn’t eat our tickets!”

“Well, at least I’m not a softy!

“Hey!” Bakura opens his mouth to argue, but Marik holds out his hand.

“Come on, let’s dance!”

Bakura smiles, takes his hand, and they start dancing to Marik’s song.

And a strange thing, your life could end up changing,

While you’re dancing through!

#datacow'scontest #tbh this was a ton of fun #kinda had to rush bc i have a terrible addiction to procrastination #but i got it done #idk why but i put some broadway references in here #marik strikes me as a broadway person #i'm starting to doubt that i will ever be able to write a serious story #oh well #yugioh #thiefshipping

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nikibogwater · 4 years ago

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Was sick today and watched one of my absolute favorite comfort films to distract myself. And now, an editorial for you all:

Reasons Tangled is one of the best animated Disney movies (in no particular order):

It is very focused and story/character-driven. There are no wasted scenes or useless characters who are clearly only there to sell merch. And no, I don’t want to hear that Pascal was useless, he was literally Rapunzel’s only source of genuine, selfless love before Flynn stumbled into her life, and he spends the entire movie just making sure she’s safe and happy. Also even if he was useless, at least he’s quiet.

Nothing irritating or cringey, like fart jokes, whiney voices, or meme references.

That being said, holy flip, this movie is hilarious. It uses slapstick comedy in such an effective way, along with punchy dialogue, witty one-liners, and unexpected visual gags. But at no point does the comedy ever overstay its welcome.

The story is very self-contained and intimate--it’s only interested in the fate of its two main characters, and it doesn’t try to convince you that there’s anything more at stake than their personal wellbeing. It is also a very smart re-telling of a classic fairy tale with some much needed updates to the story that don’t detract from the original vibe or appeal of said fairy tale.

It takes a good hard look at the nature of manipulation and abuse, and doesn’t shy away from showing just how subtle those things can be--which is not something you usually get from a “kids’ movie.”

Rapunzel is not a superpowered Mary Sue who gets everything done by herself. She’s smart and goal-oriented, but is not ashamed to ask for (or demand, as is the case with Flynn) help when she knows she needs it. She is timid and naïve, but also kindhearted and sweet. She improves the lives of everyone she comes into contact with simply by being polite and accepting of others’ flaws. So no, she’s not a girl-power fantasy heroine, she’s a relatable and realistic young woman, and I personally like that a lot better.

Flynn Rider/Eugene Fitzherbert isn’t a stereotypical Disney Prince. He has depth and complexity, a muddled sense of morality that comes from being exposed to the cruelty and unfairness of the world from far too young an age. BUT HE IS NOT A FATALISTIC CYNIC WHO TRIES TO FORCE HIS BAD EXPERIENCES ON RAPUNZEL, IN SPITE OF THE FACT THAT SHE IS AN EASY TARGET FOR THAT KIND OF THING. Once they become friends, he’s even eager to show her the nicer parts of the world, and does his best to make sure she has the happy birthday she deserves.

Also on the subject of Eugene, even though he initially has no interest in helping Rapunzel achieve her dream, he is still respectful towards her and protects her when the situation becomes genuinely dangerous. Yes, he’s a self-centered prat at the start of the movie, and absolutely tries to manipulate her into letting him out of the bargain, but he’s not a heartless monster, and at no point does he ever entertain the thought of actually threatening or harming her in order to get the crown back.

One more thing on Eugene: him rediscovering the self he left in his childhood through Rapunzel’s enthusiasm and kindheartedness is a good arc, and it makes him falling in love with her even more believable.

Eugunzel is one of the best examples of a healthy couple in any Disney movie. There’s no imbalanced power dynamic between them, they are very much a team from very early on, working together as equals. And once they realize how much they truly care for each other, they are both willing to sacrifice anything and everything to keep the other safe. Tangled doesn’t give you that “Oh, love is a flittery feeling in your stomach, it’s the starry eyes and romantic gestures, it’s a feeling” nonsense. Tangled straight-up says “Yo. True love means you’re willing to put yourself and your desires aside in order to help the other person--and I don’t just mean accepting minor inconveniences, I mean actually dying to protect them, if necessary. Love ain’t for pansies, y’all.”

Unlike other movies (cough! Frozen! cough!), which just had to spell everything out for us in easy-to-remember one-liners that summed up all the major messages in the movie, Tangled never shoves its themes down your throat. It’s most concerned with telling a good story first and foremost, and everything else is woven in there with subtlety and nuance.

The film doesn’t shy away from the fact that the world is messy. It’s not the dark, soul-sucking void that Gothel tried to tell Rapunzel it was, but it’s still unfair and sometimes cruel. But you can always find good, even in the most unexpected places, and that’s why you can’t close yourself off to experiencing the outside world and its inhabitants, even those you might initially write off as “bad.”

This movie is flipping gorgeous, alright? Like, if I had the choice to visit any world from any Disney movie, I would pick Corona, hands-down. Every environment is so beautifully crafted, with intricate, artistic detail. The Lantern Scene is one of my absolute favorite animated sequences from any movie. And the character expressions are so real and evocative, it makes you feel those emotions right down to your bones.

The voice acting is incredible, and it is the standard to which I’ve held all voice acting ever since I first saw this movie. And no, Mandy Moore isn’t just “another celebrity voice” here. Her voice is actually perfect for Rapunzel because it captures that sweet, youthful enthusiasm that is the core of her character.

The music is good, idk what y’all are talking about. No, there’s no Broadway power ballads or anything, but it serves the movie well. Also Tangled was more interested in being a good story than having a soundtrack that would be touted and overshared so much and blared in so many grocery stores and waiting rooms that eventually people would become embittered towards it.

And finally, this is not an objective reason why the movie is good, but I had to include it: Tangled is one of the most influential movies in my life. I first saw it when I was 13 years old, and it has shaped my creative style and taste in media more than any other film or book. If you read any of my fanfics, I can easily point out some small element of it that connects back to this movie. If you look at any of my doodles, they are very heavily inspired by the lush colors and expressive faces that defined Tangled.

TL;DR: Tangled is good, and I want more people to understand that, and not dismiss it as “just another Disney Princess movie.”

#niki rambles #sick days #disney #tangled

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cl-babydew · 4 years ago

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Another Camp Camp one, and this is a long one: Name the Top 5 things that you like or love about *each* kid from the main trio (Max, Neil, Nikki) and the performing trio (Preston, Nerris, Harrison).

Okay, here we go! XD

Max:

1.) I love how real he is. You know? Like, he may be negative all the time, but most of those times, he isn’t wrong. The world isn’t all sunshine and rainbows, and he’s always there to point that out. Which to me, keeps the campers a bit more grounded. Someone has to do it.

2.) The fact that he can be compassionate in his own ways! X3 Like, he doesn’t want to show that he’s protecting you, or caring for you, so he just keeps up the act he has, while still trying his best to sneakily be there for you and watch out for you. It’s like a sibling thing, “No one can call them that, except me!” I love that a lot! XD It’s cute!

3.) His relationship with the others! I really love seeing him interact with the campers, and counselors! XD It’s always fun! Plus, he tends to learn from many of them, even tho he’ll never admit that! X3

4.) The fact that he’s saved the camp more times then Space Kid can count!! XD The boy literally states that he hates the place!! He’s tried to get rid of it, or run away!! But obviously failed each time! Tho the one time he doesn’t do anything, the camp gets sold!! But yet, all he wants is to save it!! He saved the camp!! If it wasn’t for him, it wouldn’t still be up and running!! Gosh he’s grown so much, and it shows!! The camp’s basically became his home! We all know there’s something with his parents, so I always wonder if he ever were to escape, where would he go? We all know if he had the choice, he’d never go back to his original home. So where? I think now, more then anything, he’d definitely call the camp, home. JUST ADOPT HIM ALREADY, DAVID!!

5.) THE FACT THAT HE LOVES DOGS IS THE CUTEST THING EVER ABOUT HIM! XD AHHH I LOVEEEE!!! If you put him in front of a screen, playing dog videos, he’d most likely spend hours on end watching them!! XD We found one way to occupy him! XD Someone needs to get this boy a dog, stat! XD

Neil:

1.) Neil is a crazy sciencist and I love it! XD This boy does some crazy things!! He’s only what? 10?! For someone to be that age, and be that smart!! It’s crazy!! And I love that about him!! The poor boy just wanted his Science Camp! XD I’m glad he’s at Camp Campbell tho! Definitely wouldn’t be the same without him! XD

2.) The way he reacts when talking to someone he likes, is precious!! XD He’s a stuttering mess, and I couldn’t ask for more!! Not gonna lie, I really did like him and Erin!! X3

3.) HIS NOODLE ARMS!! XD IT’S GREAT!!!! Just, YES! XD👏

4.) This may sound werid, but the fact that he’s shy to use the bathroom when others are nearby, etc. is precious! XD Plus, I can relate! I mean, who couldn’t tho? XD

5.) Sometimes, he’s the sane one of the group, and sometimes he just really isn’t. And that’s okay! XD I love the fact that he tends to have his own crazy moments! He may be logical at one point, and then the next, he’s trying to steal Space Kids blood for an experiment! XD Poor Space Kid!

I just— I can’t! 🤣

Nikki:

1.) I love how hyper she is, to the point she’d probably have to be kept on a leash of some sort! XD I wouldn’t be surprised if that already happened off screen, or soon will in an ep! She just has so much energy!! XD Idk where she gets it from, but it’s impressive!

2.) Her love for her friends is very admirable!! Like for instance, even tho she felt hurt by Max teaming with another group, she was still happy that he “found someone that makes him smile”, even if that wasn’t exactly the case! XD In my opinion, I think she’s the bow holding that trio together!! One more thing, “You know what else I love about Christmas? You guys.” X3 I love her so much!

3.) I love the fact that she hangs out with everyone!! Not just her trio, but she hangs out with all the other campers!! As we’ve seen in New Adventure!! Not only that group, but she’s hung around Harrison, being fascinated by his magic!! She’s just so out there, and it’s such a good thing to see!

4.) She’s pretty innocent, unlike the others! XD We’ve seen this many times! XD I love the scene with David tho!! XD “Did you...” snickers, “hold hands?” XD She’s so precious!! XD

5.) I love how dominant and tomboyish she is! XD I’m so happy she isn’t anything like the other girls from the other camp!! She’s herself, and not trying to impress anyone, or fit in!! She also knows how to stand her ground, she doesn’t need anyone to rescue her from her problems! XD She can handle them. Well, sometimes anyway! XD

Max’s face makes me melt! X,3

Preston:

1.) The fact that he’s a theater kid, is amazing! XD Bless the creators for creating him and adding him to that camp!! Granted, not all theater kids are the same, not as overdramatic as he can be, but most of us can relate to him! XD I hope that we have more episodes with him and his plays!! Hopefully they’re able to reference to some more popular musicals!!! XD That’d be so cool to see!!!! He’s already referred to The Phantom Of The Opera, and Les Miserables!!

2.) I love how overdramatic he can be! XD Also, his shouting tho!!!!! I kinda wonder if he does that becuz he’s so use to yelling at his grandma so she can hear him? I still find it funny how he tends to randomly do it at times! XD

3.) All he wants is for people to enjoy his shows! XD Sadly, not everyone tends to pay attention, and when they do, they aren’t even sure on what’s going on. Tbh tho, some plays/musicals are really confusing, or make no sense! XD I hope one day he’s able to achieve his dreams, and make it to broadway!

4.) I love how presistant and determined he is to entertain others!! Especially in the season 4 episode! He was trying so hard for the campers! He wanted to keep up the laughter and smiles! Deep down, all he wants is for others to appreciate his work, like many of us, so he tries to be satisfied with that one thing, tho we see it was getting tough. He wanted them to appreciate all his work, not just one joke he made. All of it. He’s put so much work into the others, and he wants that acknowledgement! It’s understandable by many of us! When you work so hard on something, but it doesn’t get that acknowledge, yet that other project that you didn’t even try on, got it! It’s nice to know that project got it, but it makes the progress you made, feel like it wasn’t worth it, or feel like it wasn’t progress at all. Okay, maybe I should get back on track! XD The point is, that’s most likely how he’s feeling! This just makes his character more understandable. (Maybe I just look too deep into things? XD)

5.) All in all, he’s a pretty funny character!! I just really enjoy seeing him on screen! I really hope we get more of him in future episodes!

Nerris:

1.) I love loveeee LOVEEE her design!! Like, the first moment I met her, I just fell in love with her character design!!!! Her hair style is incredible, especially on her!! She has plastic adorable elf ears!! X3 FRECKLESSSSS!!! JUST FRECKLESSS!!!!! Her skin color just makes her blue eyes pop (especially in fanart)!! She’s so so pretty!! Not to mention her outfit is precious! X3

2.) Her lisp that she gets from her braces is so so dang cute!!!! XD Ahh I love it!! I love it so much!! She’s just so adorable!

3.) She can be feisty and I really enjoy that! XD Poor Harrison always being the one she picks on tho! We all know why tho! X3

4.) I just love the fact that she tends to spit out random facts and references to larping, even tho I never exactly understand anything! XD Her imagination is great! Not that all the others’ isn’t ether! XD

5.) She’s such a fun character! I would love it if we could have more of her!! And even if she can be a tad rude at times, she can be just as kind and caring, like with Ered!!! Gosh I hope we get more of her!!! XD

And finally,

Harrison:

1.) He’s an awkward dork, and I love him! XD I love how one minute he can be totally confident in what he’s doing, and the next be completely awkward!! I think most of the time, Nerris is the reason for his akwardness, even tho he can sometimes fight back! XD

2.) The fact that his magic is actually real, is something I wasn’t expecting, but I loved! XD It’s crazy!! It’s also sad for many reasons!! This poor boy is seriously going through a lot mentally, and not to forget, physically! Someone plz help him?!

3.) He’s so interesting!!!!! I want more of him!!! A lot more!! There’s so many interesting things to learn about him, and those few episodes that focused on him only led to tons more questions!! GAHHHH I REALLY HOPE WE GET MORE!! XD

4.) Like Nerris, though not as loved, his outfit is pretty cute! X3 I especially love his little top hat and gloves!! Those are nice touches!

5.) At first, I didn’t really care for the way his voice sounded. It seemed at first that the VA wasn’t doing a good job. Though I have to admit, it’s totally grown on me, and I’ve grown to love it as the episodes progressed!! I learned that it wasn’t the VA at all, but how the character was! It really fits Harrison!

Thanks for the ask!! XD This was fun!!

Sorry it took me a while to finish tho!!!

One main thing though, WE NEED A PREFORMING TRIO EPISODE! AT LEAST ONE?!!!!! 🙈 Gosh I want it so bad!

#long post! XD #camp camp #cc main trio #cc trouble trio #cc max #cc neil #cc nikki #cc preforming trio #cc preston #cc nerris #cc harrison

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dashielldeveron · 4 years ago

Text

Viper VIII: Inter Vivos

*author slaps bumper sticker across ass that reads I BREAK FOR QUARANTINE*

Summary: You have a thought that only Steve Urkel and black-out drunks can have: did I do that?

Warnings: swears, the law. Murder/death. Stupid internet comments.

Show (3719) Comments on “There is Nothing New Under the Sun, But You Are New in Your Conglomeration.”

skellingtonbabey: thanks for putting all of the *gestures vaguely* into historical context. no one’s ever bothered to explain this shit to me, especially in such simple and thorough language. it’s like every other resource i try to learn from is stylistically designed to make me more confused.

readyplayer69: Just because it’s from the 60s and is racist doesn’t mean that it doesn’t have intrinsic value based on the goal towards which it was working. You’re a fucking lunatic. I have a degree in political science, so I know what the fuck I’m about. Though some of the protests may have excluded the minorities you’re talking about, it doesn’t mean that they weren’t ultimately working towards good fucking policies for everyone involved. It’s not like they were doing anything important then anyway; white people had to be the mouthpiece for…Read More

volcanolesbian: bro have u seen the incels freaking out over this???? it got linked in their cursed forum and they SO BADLY wanted u 2 hate women now. like you can regress from being a feminist once you’ve woken up. they’re giving u shit bc you called out the racist terrorists who were active in their community lmao. i can post screenshots if u want. But bruv it’s like they haven’t read anything you’ve written before lol

mozARTsexandviolins: I get when you say that ingenuity spawns ideals for the greater good, but don’t you think tradition has its place? How do we know if the new can spawn the greater good? How do we judge ourselves? Who watches the watchers?

simpleplan2eatthedirt: cool cool nice nice. protesting is awesome, but be sure to get out there to fucking VOTE, people!!! Here’s a link to register to vote.

EaterJohn: Hello. It is nice to hear from you again, Epiales. Always a treat. Very insightful commentary on modern and past protests. I didn’t know about all of the revolutions in Europe 1848. I’ve send this to my co, and it’s already sparked a good conversation about who we are as a protesting people as we stand in history. Again, sorry to bother you, but I was wondering when the next article in your “Aeneid Autopsies: Current Crimes Reflected in Ancient Times” series was going to be released? It’s my…Read More

horneyvulcanbasterd: @mozARTsexandviolins Is that a Star Trek reference? Bc if so the answer’s Starfleet Command lol

MrsKatsukiBakagou: epiales. you have watered my crops and harvested my fields. thank you for the food.

mightiestavengereatmyass: eat shit and die, commie scum. your just a hired propagandaist for the fucking alt-left, aren’t you? You have no right to be running your collum in a real newspaper or on this fucking website. sending u anthrax in the mail would be too cool a death for you. I hope your so-called terrorist groupsfind out where you live and fucking murder you in the middle of the night. fukcs like you are the reason the country is going to shit the police have a total constitutional right int aht jurisdiction to enter. They had a no knock…Read More

fuckyouit’sjanuary: @readyplayer69 [image attached] [image description: blonde woman with caption reading, “I can tolerate racism, but I draw the line at looting the local target]

saltnpepa!!diner707: Hi. I’m trying to cite this piece in an essay, but your publisher isn’t listed on your website. Would you suggest using the NYT as the source in my bib? If it helps, this is due new week; idk if this will run in the NYT by then. Thanks

“I’m sending someone on a grocery run this morning,” said Tom, thumbs tapping away on his phone, “Do you need anything? Want anything?”

You glanced up from your laptop, closing it as much as you could without the light dimming. “I think I’m good, unless you used the last of the shredded cheese at some point.”

“Shredded…cheese,” he said under his breath, typing, “You mentioned capri-suns the other day.”

“Yeah, but I can tolerate the nasty, new flavour. No rush. Here’s a wild idea,” you said, and you waited until he looked up from his phone, a couple of ungelled curls falling over his forehead. “What if—now, don’t dismiss me as crazy; hear me out—what if we went to the store ourselves?”

“Again, no.” Tom grasping his coffee by the round of the mug, despite there being a perfectly functional handle. “Stop pressing me for it.”

“I’m not asking to go to a damn Broadway play. I’m asking to go to the closest 7-11,” you said, jiggling your leg and then making a conscious decision to stop fidgeting, instead scooting your chair closer under the table so that the arms slid underneath.

Tom hummed, his eyes not leaving his phone screen, but when you didn’t continue, he raised an eyebrow as he scowled at you. “Broadway is shut down because of the bomb threat.”

“Fuck off; you know what I meant.”

“Viper,” said Tom, and he locked his phone to set it on his napkin. “Do you want to get assassinated?”

“The term assassination implies I’m getting murdered for political reasons instead of the copious other crimes you’ve had me commit. So, I invite it.” Put your hands on the table where he can see them; it makes you seem more trustworthy. “Does 7-11 have an open carry policy?”

“If it’s any consolation, the renovated office should be waiting for you when you return.”

“It’s not.” You lifted your mug to your lips. “Working from here only makes me feel like a damn bureaucrat. Like I have no stake in the matter. I don’t want to become detached from everything; I might make a callous decision and send people where they can’t come back.”

“Keep watching yourself. If you stay on guard,” said Tom, running his middle finger around the rim of his mug, “then you won’t stray from me.”

“I’m useless here.”

“Then maybe you should become accustomed to the idea of being useless.”

Swallowing, you stared down into your tea. “There’s only so much I can get done through answering emails. Not to mention I hate answering emails. That’s how you get more emails.”

“Harrison has been telling me that your schematics have been more thorough since you’ve been holed up in here.” Tom tipped his mug all the way back to get the last of his coffee. “You’re still being just as productive, if not more methodical.”

“Did you mean obsessive? I have—I’ve had too much time to think. I’d rather not be alone with my thoughts, if I can help it.”

***

You could only read so much before losing your mind. You could only deal with so many of the same exact problems over and over again for lower level soldiers. You could only chart so many stars. You could only read so much fanfiction (if your identity thief were tracking your phone, he’d probably be baffled as to why you kept reading fic for fandoms you weren’t even a part of due to the desire for new ideas).

You could only give Glory Pham so many excuses as to why you’re not with her in person at the Museum of Natural History.

Sucking in through your teeth, you hovered your fingers above the keyboard.

Dear Ms. Pham,

Glad to hear John Mulaney’s signed on. Next step would be to ensure de Blasio doesn’t directly interact with him, given their history. Perhaps I should proof his set beforehand?

Unfortunately, I regret to inform you that I cannot attend the briefing in person yet again. I am currently indisposed, seeing as I am currently in hiding at my hot boss’s house, due to how dead I might be should I leave it (thus the basis of its appeal). Not to mention that if you criticise my blazer choices again, I shall peel the skin off your perfectly made-up face. Get fucked; getting your eyeliner tattooed on was a hell of a decision.

You shook your head, backspaced the last few lines, and stretched towards the wicker end table to grab your glass of pink lemonade, and you stole a glance at Tom’s work as you did so. A couple of files spread across his white wicker lounger (two blue files [socials of the family], two green [recent bids], a yellow [Manhattan locations], and a brown [requests from politicians, upper East side]). The pink sticky-notes had your and his written exchanges and edits on certain papers, and his laptop was open, the screen dimmed, while he copied something into a notebook with his cell phone held between his shoulder and his ear, just listening to the computerised voice.

He had joined you on the back porch to work remotely, claiming he couldn’t go into the city today due to the absence of news on Zendaya—if any information arose, he’d said he wanted your diagnosis immediately.

You wiped your forehead with your sleeve as a sweat drop slinked behind Tom’s ear. Even Tessa wouldn’t run in the heat; she’d curled up by the porch railing, her tail slapping against her water bowl. In an experiment to see if she wanted to spend some time outside, you’d slid the glass door open for Trout, to which she turned around to retreat to the bedroom.

Not all of the clothes you’d ordered had arrived yet, so you were stuck wearing autumnal clothes with long sleeves. To exacerbate matters, you were constantly moving—jiggling your leg, tapping your fingers—you couldn’t sit still for very long anymore; you had taken to pacing the porch when you couldn’t concentrate on the stars.

(Once, Tom had come out at night to check on you, wiping the sleep out of his eyes and sitting in silence with you. He’d made you go to bed after a while, claiming you’d run yourself into the ground if you kept this restlessness up.)

When your phone beeped, the both of you jolted at the sound. Tom hung up on the robotic voice as you scrambled to your phone, and he bent your way. “Is it Zendaya?”

Biting the inside of your cheek, you shook your head. “No. Looks like it’s a jailbreak.”

Tom sighed, his shoulders heaving as he eased back in his seat. “Where from?”

“I don’t even care,” you said, letting your phone fall to your lap. You slumped back in your chair, shielding your eyes from the sun with your arm. But you straightened yourself again and checked. “From Central. They don’t even know who’s all escaped yet.”

“It’d be too much of a gift if New York City would fucking relax for five minutes.”

“It seems like it’s in more uproar than usual lately,” you said, sipping through the reusable straw of your pink lemonade. “Do you suppose it’s our fault?”

Tom took a moment to pluck his damp t-shirt away from his chest. “I don’t think we’re instigating. If anything, we’re simply reacting to chaos.” He stood up and stretched, raising his arms above his head—his biceps strained at the sleeves, and the hem rose above his v-lines. “Unless you’re doing something I don’t know about.”

Ah, casual suspicion. “You’ve caught me,” you said as he approached Tessa and crouched next to her, “I’ve been running a koi smuggling gig on the side.”

“Why koi?” He held out his hand for Tessa to sniff, and she readily accepted his hand for pats. “Are they hard to get?”

“I don’t know,” you said, shrugging, “but I’ve been wondering if they’d be able to survive in your grist mill pond. You look through that water straight to the bottom, nothing living in your way. Just rocks and old equipment.”

Tom sat against the porch railing with a jittery Tessa partially in his lap. “Should we get some?”

“Oh, fuck off, Tom,” you said, grinning, a sweat drop falling onto your mousepad as you shook your head, “You can’t entertain every little pipedream I have.”

“Watch me. What do you want for Christmas?”

You ducked your head, biting your lip. “Promise me something.”

“Provided it’s not my head on a stake, I will,” he said, scratching Tessa behind her ears and cringing a bit when she stretched to lick his face.

“Then we’re going in person to the pre-opening fundraising gala for the Gawain Diamond.”

Tom narrowed his eyes. “Viper.”

“Bitch, I got John Mulaney to sign on to do the opening monologue, and he’s probably gonna roast de Blasio again. I’m not missing that.”

Your phone blared an alert again, and both of you held your breath as you unlocked it.

“Got a list of prisoners who escaped. Small group. Delores, Larson, Duncan, Mays, Selvin,” you said, “There’s more, but I don’t know them. Tell us something important, by God. Anyway, we’re going. I didn’t say I was going alone, did I? You’ll be there. I’ll be safe, and you’ll be safe.”

His jaw shifting to the side, Tom stilled his hand on Tessa’s back, and then he lifted it to flick sweat off his neck. “How many of us maximum can you get in?”

“It’s a fundraiser for idiotic rich people; if there are too many people without a name, they’ll be noticed.”

“It can’t be just us.”

“Why? Afraid you can’t protect me on your own?”

“Now, don’t start that.” Tom herded Tessa off his lap and onto her outside bed. “I’m not falling for it.”

“Yes, yes, I’m fully aware you’re capable of ripping me in half,” you said, draining your pink lemonade, the airy suction coming through your straw (almost loud enough that you couldn’t hear Tom’s sputtering over it—almost—and his phone beeping). “Want me to get that?”

“Bring it here,” he said, and you snatched it while he sat on the railing, dangling his legs off the side.

“It’s,” you said, eyebrows shooting to your hairline as you read the little notification, “It’s a tweet from Zendaya.” You tossed it to him to unlock and leant on the railing next to him, arm grazing his thigh with a heightened awareness of how close you were to his sweaty, sweaty abdomen. No! No time to thirst. Friend time.

Tom unlocked his phone and held it at your eye level, turning it horizontally as he pulled up the tweet.

ZENDAYA (@ZendayaMedias): Felt cute. Might delete later.

[video]

Tom pulled up the clip, waiting for it to load. “Why didn’t she post it to instagram, then?”

“The finer details of social media are an enigma. Do I look like I know,” you said, and his thumb hovered over the play button.

He cranked the volume up before pressing play, having to try twice due to how slippery his fingers were. “I wonder if Haz has seen this yet.”

A vertical shot of a murky, grey sky from the bow of a boat and dark ocean as far as the camera can see. It pans across the starboard side, and this boat is the only one in sight.

Only the sound of waves striking the boat.

The camera tilts down. Zendaya’s writhing on the deck, furiously straining against rope bonds that line up the entirety of her arms and up her calves; she’s yelling furiously at the person behind the camera through duct tape.

Scuffed, black boots roll Z to the starboard gunwale. She’s still fighting, still shouting.

The camera trucks to the right; before, the pair of cinderblocks attached to her feet were concealed. It returns to her face. A glove grabs part of her hair to show the weights tied into it. She bucks up to headbutt the camera; he avoids it.

Tom clenched his free hand on his thigh. “We’re running another scan for that black-stubble bell jackass from her instagram; did we have any fucking leads at all? What’s his fucking motivation? So he slept with her, allegedly; did she say no to a second time? Doesn’t fucking merit—”

The boot kicks the cinderblocks off the boat, and the camera tilts down to follow the trail of bubbles.

It’s quiet.

But then the camera pans to portside, where the guy in the picture with Zendaya is similarly tied up, but he’s openly weeping and shaking his head. He’s got something drawn on his forehead in black marker. The cameraman steps closer to focus on it: it’s a circle with an upward curve resting on top of it.

He’s still wearing the bell necklace.

Then the cameraman backs away and raises a gloved hand, in which a gun is aimed at the other’s forehead.

The bullet goes through the circle, and the bell rattles as he’s kicked off. Fewer bubbles.

Then the camera tilts up to show off the boat’s surroundings: a black and barren ocean, as far as the eye can see.

When the video started to loop, Tom switched his screen off, his phone hanging loosely in his grip. You released of his thigh once you noticed you’d grabbed onto him, and the evidence of your touch faded as the fabric relaxed.

His eyes glossed over at the blank screen, and his mouth opened before closing again, running his tongue over his lower lip. Tom brought a fist to his mouth and furrowed his brow, his hand hardly concealing the growing tremble of his jaw.

You took a step away from him, rubbing your arms as you ducked your head. “I’m going back inside,” you said, hoping Trout felt like being clutched to your chest, “I’m cold.”

***

The next morning, your mouth felt heavy and dry. You sneaked out as the sun was rising to go hide in the woods surrounding Tom’s house, but you talked yourself out of it. He would make too much of a fuss if he couldn’t find you—but you could delay the inevitable conversation even further. Both of you had separated and kept to yourselves the rest of the evening. Kept quiet.

So you rounded the outside of the house. You’re not camping out in a fucking copse. When you reached the pond, you scanned it for a dry place to hide, but nothing really held any appeal, save for the rounded platform where the mill wheel used to spin, its spoke notches overflowing with moss. You managed to get to it after scrambling alongside the stones for a few minutes, and though it didn’t look like you could get down the same way, you settled against the wall, scraping some moss out of the notches so that your feet could rest more comfortably in them.

(Dr. Prine called ten minutes after you sent her the email. “Did you send me the correct article?”

“Yeah,” you said, rubbing your face wash onto your cheeks, “Considering it’s the only one I have ready, and I can’t bring myself to write anything. I tried. I just fucking can’t.”

“I don’t think you want this published at this point in your life.”

“I don’t fucking care. Whoever’s using my pen name probably knows who the fuck I am in general. Just publish it.”

“Honey,” said Dr. Prine, her voice softening (and fumbling, like she was holding the phone to her ear with her shoulder), “You should probably rethink this. It’s going to connect Epiales you back to Viper you. Get some sleep; eat breakfast. Call me back then.”

“It’s an appropriate article for the political climate.”

“Not for your personal life.”

“I don’t fucking care,” you said between splashing water on your face, “I don’t. It’s a good fucking article, and hopefully, it can affect people for the upcoming election. Fuck self-preservation. Send it to the Times already.”

“Did I dial the wrong number?”

“Hilarious, Dr. Prine. I know it’s not the smartest thing for me to do, but I can’t—absolutely can’t—write anything. I don’t know for how long, but for now, at least.” You blotted your face dry. “I’ve got to meet standard deadlines if I’m keeping my column. It’s really only dangerous if Tom reads it and makes the connection, and his brain is offline right now.”

And so Aeneid Autopsies: Current Crimes Reflected in Ancient Times, chapter twelve, “The Political Tradition as Mob Rule,” would be published on Saturday. It’s a little too in the know about the mafia, but hey, you had written it on a whim a month ago, and you were known for your extensive research, anyway. It most likely shouldn’t be too different from your other exposés, though they weren’t on topics that were deliberately misleading the public by what information was out there.

The more you thought about it, it was almost like you wanted to reveal yourself, wanted to get stabbed while you were sleeping, because there’s an overwhelming question rolling around in your brain like a mis-weighted shooter marble: is this—)

“It’s not your fault.”

With crossed arms, Tom leant against the stone wall, his leg bent back for his bare foot to rest flat against it. He glanced sideways at you, sitting on your mill wheel perch almost halfway across the pond, but closer to the far side than to him.

He’s got major bedhead, his curls just fucking flopping about out of his part, and even from where you are, his face burned red amidst wet tracks trailing down it. Still, thank God for little mercies—his biceps were fucking straining the sleeves of his white t-shirt, and those idiotic, blessed grey sweatpants were low on his hips.

You lifted your head from your knees but still clutched them to your chest. “You’re not going out, then?”

“Of course not,” Tom said, and he wiped his nose with the back of his hand. “Can’t be crying during a meeting, yeah?”

“Been boxing?”

“Yeah.”

“Did you get any sleep last night?”

“Not really.”

He ran his tongue over his lower lip and sighed, and then he slid his hands into his pockets, his eyes glossing over while he watched the moss you’d picked off float in the pond.

You’re not going to fucking cry. Tom came out here for a reason. He has a purpose. All you have to do is wait.

Eventually, he said, “You’re avoiding what I said.”

You tilted your head.

“Listen, I know you’re beating yourself up about it. It’s not your fault this happened. None of this is your fault. Hey.” Tom tapped the wall, the travelling reverberations making you look up at him. “Whoever’s doing this is doing it of their own volition and not because of you. You hold no culpability for this.”

“Bruh,” you said, “One of your best friends is dead, and you’re comforting me? I thought I was the masochist.”

Tom scowled, his brow furrowing. “Viper—”

“I can’t interact with someone without putting them in danger, at a disturbingly high rate. You want me to enumerate where I’ve stuck my nose in not my business and people have gotten killed? Senator Hernandez, Isadora,” you began, holding up two fingers, “The nine men guarding Isadora, Maccabruno, Polson—”

“Don’t you dare do that to yourself.” Tom took a step forward, his foot almost curving into the pond. “You didn’t use the knife. You didn’t pull any triggers.”

“Yeah, but I sent them there. And a good many of them went because it was their job.” You sneered and propped your chin on your knees again.

“And it’s part of your job—”

“Yeah, whatever. Your friend is dead, and I have no home. I’ve stopped contacting the few people in my circle on the chance that they get dragged into this—Grace, Adrien—he’s the lights specialist guy, in case you don’t remember—I’ve got to email Glory, but that can’t be helped. And Dr. Prine only—fuck,” you said, dragging your hands down your face. “I don’t want anything to fucking happen to Dr. Prine. Or your family, for that matter.”

“Everyone not involved in the business is currently in hiding upstate,” said Tom, eyes narrowed as he glared at you. “If you like, I can ensure the same—”

“Stop acting so damn calm, Tom.” You let your legs dangle off the platform, hands clenching the edges. “I don’t have any strings left to pull. And fucking hell, I know that it would be extremely and absurdly conceited of me to believe that this series of crimes is aimed specifically at me, because how deluded, how arrogant could I get—but goddammit, this stuff feels a little too personalised. It feels like this person knows me.”

Tom clicked his tongue. “Don’t you think it’s worth something that Glory Pham has been left alone? He knows how to get into Crosscreek, yet Glory hasn’t been touched. Is that not worthwhile?”

Your eyes watered, but you ducked your head so that he couldn’t see—but you released a dry sob (Fuck! Now is not the time for crying! Now is the time for being badass! Frown, or something!).

Tom spoke so quietly you almost didn’t catch it. “Do you want to leave?”

God, no. But it would make you feel like less of a burden. “Let me find an apartment first.”

“No, not like that. Hey, V. Look at me,” he said, and he tapped on the wall again.

You wouldn’t. Not like this. Not when your nose was running and when you didn’t have a plan.

“Please look at me, Viper.”

Glowering, you raised your head, lifting your chin higher than normal to seem confident, and oh, God—his eyes were wide and gentle; he’s leaning as far as he can over the pond, still unable to reach you.

“What I meant was if you wanted to leave the mob.”

It rang through your head like a distant cathedral bell, chiming through a deserted town—but then you were farther, out on the mountains, still listening to faint clanging.

“You’d have to kill me,” you said, shaking your head, “Don’t you remember?”

“Fuck,” Tom was saying, sucking in through his teeth, and after glancing at the water, he started jogging around the pond.

“I swore. I bled. And then even after that—then you knighted me.” You inhaled sharply when he reached the stones you’d climbed. “I’ve let you down.”

“Viper, get the fuck down from there and come here,” he said, and he withdrew, winching, when he stepped on a sharp edge.

“We shouldn’t have met,” you said, looking over your shoulder at him, and Tom froze, his hand partially gripping a hole in the stone wall. “I shouldn’t have taken the job. I should have gone to a different city. I should have—”

“Wasted your life away in the shadows? Just shut up and get down here.”

“Ah! The fuck?” You swatted his hand away when it grazed the platform, and when he climbed up another step, you pushed yourself off the platform and into the pond.

The first thing that struck you was how quiet everything was once the bubbles dissipated, and then you noticed how clear the water was, even from within it—glancing down, you could easily see your feet treading water above the broken grist mill wheels that had sunken to the bottom.

Before you could take it in to feel the emptiness in your chest, bubbles filled your vision again—and then his hands were grappling for you, grasping at your clothes, and pulling you towards the surface.

“I wasn’t fucking drowning,” you said, sliding a hand back through your hair, while Tom shook his head to flick off excess water. “I was fine without—”

“I know you weren’t.” Tom gripped your waist tightly enough to be painful, and he slid his other hand up between your shoulder blades. “I know. You wouldn’t die on me, and I’m not letting anyone else lay their hands on you. C’mon, arms around.”

He guided your arms around his waist, and once you had a good grip (hands sliding up his back), he kicked off to swim to the stone wall, backing you into it. Your toes skimmed the bottom of the pond, but Tom kept your head above the water, his thumbs circling your hipbones through your wet clothes.

Tom closed his eyes, his eyelashes heavy with water droplets. “There’s no solution to this where you die, got it?”

“Shucks.”

“I mean it. Talk to me. Tell me what you can.” Tom let out a breath slowly, and he bent to rest his forehead on your shoulder. “Please,” he said once you tensed up, his breath hot through your wet shirt, “Won’t you let me in?”

(Fuck fuck fuck fuck his chest is flush against yours; he’s so warm, so damn warm all over, and the water’s chill only makes you want to cling to him more, fuck.)

“You won’t like me,” you said, tentatively lifting a hand to curl your fingers into his hair, pulling slightly, “I’m not whom I’ve presented to you. I don’t have it under control.”

“I don’t expect you to.” Tom turned his head towards you; his lips almost grazed your neck (you relish their warmth anyway). “You wouldn’t be human, otherwise.”

“I don’t know an awful lot. Some days it seems like all I do is guesswork.” You grimaced but kept the slim distance from Tom’s mouth. If he wanted to, he would. “I’m lost completely on whoever the fake Epiales is. I keep looking for a pattern in everything, even—even so far back as to—”

You stuttered. Tom had pressed his lips to the base of your neck.

“There’s no consistency,” he said, nuzzling his nose against the spot where your neck met shoulder, “but there’s got to be a larger plan. I get it. The whole case is like a hydra, and we’re chopping blindly at the heads.”

(Oh, my God, he kissed you? He kiss the neck? He?)

“Oh! I forgot to tell you.” Tom pulled away to look you in the eye, and your mouth hung open of its own accord—come back! “I made myself watch the video again.” His jaw shifted. “To see if I missed anything, and I did. This time, I recognised the symbol on the guy’s forehead.” Tom lightly traced it onto your forehead with his middle finger. “It’s a zodiac symbol. It’s the one for Taurus.”

You nodded, still not really thinking at full capacity. “Great. Another piece of evidence that I won’t be able to make fucking sense of. Goddammit. I’m so useless. Goddammit,” you said, dropping your hand from his hair into the water with a splash. “Tom, I don’t talk to my mother much anymore. She doesn’t know where or who I am, and to be honest, I don’t know who I am, either. I don’t know where the truth is.”

You nearly slapped him when you cupped his cheek, like you were desperate, like you had to be touching him, skin on skin, that instant. It’d be nice if he would close his eyes and lean into your touch, maybe kiss your palm, but Tom simply stared at you in shock, eyes wide, brows raised, mouth pinched.

Don’t tell him, you whore. You built this fucking kingdom with its walls and bastions so that you would be safe when the outer defences crumbled. You’ve set aside parts of yourself into neat little boxes so that you can throw any of them away at any time and escaped unscathed. Don’t you fucking dare screw that up. Tom doesn’t know about Epiales so that you can expose and destroy him if you’re on his chopping block; it’s insurance for when everything falls.

Bitch, since when do you want to be honest and raw and vulnerable around anyone?

You can’t let him in.

“You’re still a woman of honour,” Tom said, and—oh, God, oh, fuck—he’s easing his hands down your body, his chest pressed against yours again, and he’s sliding them down your thighs to hook underneath your knees, and he’s hitched you up against the wall, the definition of his muscles real and palpable through the wet clothes, warm, warm, warm—

“I should apologise,” you said, turning your head to the side while he steered your legs around his waist, “I can’t imagine what you must be feeling right now.”

“You can’t?” Tom shifted you upwards, and that’s it; your heat is directly against him; you can feel every pull and tensing of his tendons, and if he keeps moving the way he is, then you’ll—

“I’m so sorry for making this about me when Z was closer to you. We shouldn’t waste time on me; we need to be searching, arranging a funeral if we can’t find anything.” You scrunched your eyes shut.

“You’re deflecting.” Tom let out a shuddery sigh. “I’ve lost too many people. Don’t make me lose you when you’re right in front of me,” he said, and he pressed his lips right below your ear.

You flinched away on impulse but tried to relax into him, blinking profusely.

Tom pushed against you (not localised enough to qualify as a thrust), and he cleared his throat before pulling away from your neck. “Listen, please. Please.” He shifted your weight to one hand and gripped your chin with his freed one. His eyes flickered to your mouth before he moved to rest his hand on your cheek. “You’re invaluable. Irreplaceable. You are no burden and are not at fault.” He clenched his jaw. “But I know you’re keeping something from me, and I will make the answer fall from your lips soon.”

Your own chin was shaking, and he was too close. If you put aside separate-self-as-insurance for a moment, let’s consider Tom did find out about Epiales. Would he control you through it? Would he use you to influence those he couldn’t reach? Would he grab hold of Dr. Prine? He might squeeze your life and time through his fist, and your freedom would be gone. Epiales was your freedom, your space to create and connect.

He was too close.

“You’ve got to promise not to hate me,” you said, and when he raised an eyebrow, you made your decision to lean in.

“No,” he said, and—and your lips met his cheek.

He’d turned his head.

After all that, he’s going to turn his head?

“No,” he said again, taking your chin again and leading you away, back to leaning against the stone wall, “I don’t want our first kiss connected to the memory of mourning. I can wait a bit longer.”

Tom released your legs, letting them sink. “You once told me that if you let yourself be vulnerable, you didn’t want an audience. I think,” he said, frowning, “I think you still see me as an outsider. As a member of that audience. And again, you said that you didn’t want it if it weren’t real.” He stepped away from you entirely, and he started wading towards the edge of the pond. “I’m going to hold you to the same standard. I’ll wait until you’re ready to be real with me.”

Tom slinked out of the pond, flicking away what excess water he could, and he squinted into the sun on the horizon. He shook his head, water flying, and he glanced back at you and scoffed. “Easy, sweetheart. No need to wear your heart on your sleeve now.”

His voice trailed off as he rounded the corner towards the door.

The sun is rising, and you feel rather cold.

***

inter vivos: between the living

***

taglist: @hollandroos @madmadmilk @parkerroos @parsleysbaby @z-ukos @pparkerwrites @lunamyangel @stealth-spiderr @presidentbttrflyfreak @paradoxparker @bi-writes @astronomyparkers @infamous-webhead @laurfangirl424 @softspideys @gryffinpuffs @plethoraofpuppies @laucontrerasv @shootingstarsaretearsofheaven @spiderboytotherescue @cassiopeiaskies

#tom holland #tom holland x reader #tom holland/reader #tom holland fanfic #tom holland fanfiction #mob au #mob!tom holland #mob tom holland #viper au #dash it all

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majorxmaggiexboy · 4 years ago

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watching Moulin Rouge! The, Broadway version i guess:

idk whomst these dudes are but i kinda like them

“HELLO, I LOVE YOU” i’m tempted to say ‘same’ but will withhold judgement

aww does he just speak entirely in love songs or what? that’s adorable

i only saw the movie of this story Once and it was when i was Way Too Young For It and all i remember is being like “wow the singing is Nice” and being utterly shook by whatever was up with ‘Roxanne’ and also loving Come What May and something to do with an Elephant Love Medley...i think i distantly recall this character, Christian, being maybe sort of a dazey wide-eyed dreamy sort of character and maybe a sweet guy? idk but im also p sure Love Interest dies in the end :((( do they both die? i think- but nah bc isn’t he typing up the story on an a typewriter?

his hat is nice

fully just communicating via love songs

NEVER GONNA GIVE Y

he Wiggles

well that’s settled then, I love him.

aww are they all three of them friends now? Just like that? Did they just adopt him? And he’s just like Yeah Sure? this story panders to my exact interests so far please continue

“The whole thing was the single most insane idea I’d ever heard”

(intensely) “I’ll do it”

yeah no i love it so far this could be going places

“You shall live with us here, in dire and glorious poverty” oml

IS HE SINGING ROYALS

IS THIS A SONG-UPDATED VERSION OF??? WHAT

oooh! ooh go off!

“children of the revolution” is that an enjolras reference

i like this

oh. oh heavens

i want whatever that swing is that just came down from the ceiling

i mean i believe u satine but i mean it’s literally just a cool rock idk that they’re all that great tbh there are cooler rocks???

did- did she just say-

ALL THE SINGLE-???

BRICK????

i’m not sure about the sleeveless tux situation but it’s also kinda

👀

oh no did she fall down? is she okay?

is there about to be a case of mistaken identity where she’s going to think Christian is this ‘Duke’ person?

is this the Wanna Build A Snowman music??

SHUT UP AND DANCE

this is kinda fun actually

the dancing is adorable

“Would you like me to call you...’Your Grace’?” “Uhm.” AHSFJAHAJ

these three buddies are so cute i can’t wow i love friendship so much

awww ms Satine :( someone pls give her a hug :(

cannot believe they really went here with the songs like. i was not expecting the updated music XD it kinda works tho

ooh that’s a pretty curtain

ohhhh noooooo the #miscommunication

Christian please be careful with your phrasing dude you are holding a shovel and don’t even know it my guy

oh no oh no

“I don’t have much money” “u what”

“MY GIFT IS MY SONG” just come out of nowhere bro that’s fine

oh heck they’re kissin

a LOT

ms satine did you not hit on “I don’t have much money” as a little clue that this man is not the duke

chaos chaos chaos

“She’s rather sick with some obscure malaise” first of all how dare you

WHAT WAS THAT

this is absolute chaos and i love it how are they literally describing a Sailor AU of their actual lives

“In the end, should someone die?” CHRISTIAN SHUT UP

awwww a hug :3

oh hey the Duke sings nice

THIS MAN BROUGHT BACKUP DANCERS??

your name is Mr. Nasty sir that’s what it is

“Tomorrow, for celebration. Tonight? For a Friend” AWWWWWWWWWWW

Aww Satine :(

“The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return” I remember this!

love the Friendship

OH?

mr nasty why you gotta be so sinister you nasty

is Christian what they call a ‘himbo’?

TAKE ON MEEEEE

WHAT KINDA LITTLE DANCE WAS THAT

wait was this from the Mr. McGregor version? This is famil

WE CAN BE HERRRROOOOOOOOES

WE COULD BE LOVVVVVVVVVVVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERS I REMEMBER THIS

MR NASTY CAN YOU PLEASE STOP IMMEDIATELY

the umbrella i can’t

fancy blue coat

omg the “I will always love you” they did that

suddenly abrupt cut to he “,,,,madness,”

is this gonna be Roxanne?

LADY GAGA???

oh heck

heck

TOXIC BY MS BRITNEY SPEARS???

SWEET DREAMS??????

“I’ve been walking the streets, going mad with every step” like when Frollo was looking for Esmeralda or??

“I bow before no man’s title” OOOOOOH TELL HIMMMM

this music is pretty

Come What May heck yeah babey

ngl christian kinda needs his hair floofed.

that hat is ABSURD

the hat is too stupid oh my word i hate it

oh sh Chris you just blew the whole operation huh

you messed up you messed up so bad

agh it’s getting Stressful

are you about to offer him drugs bc if so pls dont

oh god youre offering him drugs

this man is lit

oh here we go it’s Roxanne time

oH???

oh jeez oh heck

oh heck

wow

oh noooooooooo

oh his name’s Andre

DUDE STOP MR NASTY YOU CAN’T JUST DO THAT

HECK OH NO CHRISTIANS HERE

so i guess getting him drunk six ways to neptune had the opposite effect of what was intended oh no

oh it’s like that part in bbc’s The Musketeers

aw satine :(

ROLLING IN THE DEEP??

YEAH MAN GO OFF ABSOLUTELY

ARE YOU GONNA KILL A MAN CHRISTIAN? IS THIS YOUR PRE-MURDER SONG?

KINDA WEAK ON THE WAY IN BUT

DID YOU JUST GROWL THE R

aw :(

christian if you don’t drop a chandelier on mr stinky bastard man,,

GO OFF SATINE

OH BOY IS HE GONNA MURDER THE DUKE IS HE GONNA DO IT

COME ON BABY

DANGIT CHRISLET WRONG TARGET YOU STOP THAT

THANKS BABE

NOW GO KILL HIM

YALL HAVE TEN MINUTES TO FIX THIS

WRONG. TARGET. CHRISLET.

STILL WRONG TARGET BRO

STOP PUTTING HER THROUGH EMOTIONAL DISTRESS SHE”S SUFFERED ENOUGH

i hate it here

there y’all go

but just for one day :(

son of a heck

oh so

oh it’s one of those like hadestown and tgm where they’re literally

awww :(

THE GREAT BELL OF CLIFTON

aw we’re back to just the three friends :(

come what may 😭😭😭

ohhhh wow

well then. that was...yeah...yeah.

#maggie watches the moulin rouge musical #long post #moulin rouge

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photolover82 · 4 years ago

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The Masked Singer Season 4 Episode 5: Last but not Least, let's (finally) meet Group C! (Commentary and Guesses)

Hey fellow Masked Singer fans! Welcome or welcome back to Ana’s Masked Singer recap, where I, Ana, recap every episode of the Masked Singer. I am so happy to be back after a short break after the World Series (thank God for the Dodgers). If you don’t know how these recaps go, first of all hi, feel free to follow me if you want to see more of these. Anyways, so how these work is that I first talk about who gets eliminated, give my thoughts, and then give my guesses and commentary for the remaining contestants and their performances. I also try to back up my guesses as much as I can by using the clues... even though I guide myself with the voice of the individual contestant. Anyways, having said that, let’s jump into it:

Warning ⚠️: If you haven’t watched the show yet, there are spoilers below, so read at your own risk.. this is your official spoiler alert warning. Don’t say I didn’t warn you...

With this episode, we met our last group of contestants, Group C, which consists of 5 masked characters, Squiggly Monster, Mushroom, Jellyfish, Lips, and Broccoli. Overall, to me, they are the weakest group vocal wise, but they were still fun to watch.

Alright, so let’s talk about the eliminated contestant, who was...

*DRUMROLL PLEASE*

Lips 💋

Performance: Alright, so she sang “Native New Yorker,” by Odessy.... and I really try to be as kind and constructive as I can with these recaps especially when critiquing their performances because being rude really doesn’t solve anything and I want you guys to understand why I don’t like a performance if I dislike a performance (so we can start an open dialogue you get me?) ... but I am so sorry, this lady can’t sing like at all. Oh and I knew exactly who she was (haha insert Ken’s voice into that phrase lol) the moment she opened her mouth. The thing is she is talking and she messed up in the middle by laughing/snorting in the performance, it was kind of hilarious not gonna lie... it made me laugh, which I guess is a good thing, but like yeah it’s kind of obvious why she left first, because she (I mean no offense to this.. well maybe I do because I am not a fan of the person under this mask like at all since she ain’t kind and civil like at all) blew it, like it kinda felt like she messed up on purpose or that she is actually horrible at singing, which is ok because she isn’t supposed to be a professional singer and that’s fine. All that to say Lips made me laugh and I appreciate it but I am kind of glad she was the first one to go....

Anyways, she was revealed to be (to no surprise of my own) controversial talk show host...

Wendy Williams

Whoop whoop, I got it right (as did like everyone who knows who she is because her voice is that distinct... oh and also she spoke during the song so it was kind of obvious, but I am still claiming my victory: Gotten 3/5 correct so far and I am proud of that number)! Anyways here are the clues that pointed to her:

Shock= she says very shocking things on her show and is a pretty polarizing figure, you either love her or hate her (I am not fond of her myself but whatever I guess)

“Speak my truth”= she’s known for stating her mind and is unfiltered with her thoughts on things

West Wing= her initials WW

Fire= Hot Takes is a segment on her show and also a reference to her book Wendy’s Got The Heat

Alright, now that we have finished with her, let’s talk about our remaining 4 masked contestants:

1. Squiggly Monster 👾

Performance: I really liked his performance of Have You Ever Seen the Rain by Creedence Clearwater Revival. He did super well, like I really liked it, I had low expectations because of the costume (it’s kind of creepy looking ngl) but I was pleasantly surprised. Having said that, the moment I heard him, because of his tone, I knew exactly who it was (again insert Ken’s voice here)...

So, for my guess, I think it is Full House actor/comedian:

Bob Saget

Ok, so besides the voice, lemme give you why I think that clues wise (credit goes to this Screen Rant article for the details idk on my own):

Penguin visual in the package= he directed a parody nature documentary called Farce of the Penguins

Father and a scoundrel= father part due to him actually being a father to 3 girls/his role on Full House as Danny Tanner (a single father of 3 daughters which I think is wow funny) and the scoundrel part referring to his raunchy/dirty comedy

Cookie clues= nod to Michelle from Full House and her love of cookies

“Breaking News” and him on a news show kind of thing= reference to his Full House character Danny Tanner being an anchor for Good Morning San Francisco

He also was on the show as a shrimp cocktail as the friend for the Taco aka Tom Bergeron! So it makes sense for him to come back this season which I am all into

2. Mushroom 🍄

Performance: Ok, so this is like the most confusing, is it a he or is it a she? That’s the biggest question, my money’s on a boy... so my guess is going to be male (I am gonna call Mushroom a he because of that so I apologize if I am misgendering them, I just need to narrow it down somehow and I am gendering them based on who I think it is, and I feel like he is the correct pronoun). Anyways, I love him, he’s my favorite Group C contestant, and his performance of This Woman’s Work was amazing, people said it was not good, but I really enjoyed it because I am a sucker for a good falsetto and this guy was almost all falsetto, I was feeling it. Having said that, maybe I like him so much because I feel like it is someone I adore, like if I meet him, I will faint status...

Having said that, I think it is Broadway star, heartthrob, actor, singer, adorable human...

Jordan Fisher

Omg he is so cute... sorry I am gonna stop being 😍 for him I promise. Anyways, big clue was a video of him singing this exact song (I think it sounds so similar, but you guys can judge for yourselves), here it is: https://youtu.be/3lzRsMl8M8Q

youtube

Apart from that, here are some actual clues (with a bit of help from this Screen Rant article) that got my mind thinking it is him:

WAITTT 🤔... before we get into that, what I found interesting is that he tweeted and I quote “Seasonal tweet to let everyone know that ____ on the masked singer is once again not me 💜” and THE MASKED SINGER RETWEETED IT... but also I just checked and this is the first time he’s ever had to clear that up... soooo maybe he’s a liar (bc of an NDA ofc you cannot really spill the beans.... but let’s go with he’s a liar)... a cute liar... but he’s lying.

Ok, now onto the clues:

A lot of Hamilton clues= “a healer and a scholar,” “young, scrappy, and fun-gy,” “shroom where it happens” = he replaced Anthony Ramos as John Laurens/Philip Hamilton in the Broadway musical Hamilton (and also can reference his Broadway roots in general like being on Dear Evan Hansen)

Started at a “rat race” and Men in Black were mice= could be a reference to his start on Disney (Liv and Maddie and Teen Beach Movie)

A shot to turn a hobby into a career= reference to him streaming video games on Twitch

Stars clue with audience= he won Dancing with the Stars back in 2017 and also hosted DWTS Junior

3. Jellyfish 💚

Performance: I really liked her performance of Big Girls Don’t Cry by Fergie even though I felt like she was holding back a bit (I can kind of say the same about Mushroom... but I still enjoyed it). I am really curious to see what she can really do, because I felt her nerves in the performance and like she can do more. This one’s killing me because I feel like I have heard that voice but I can’t put my finger on who it could be

So, with that said, I have no idea who to guess:

But I do know that it isn’t ✨Billie Elish✨

No, but like seriously, that ain’t Billie Elish even tho a lot of people are guessing it, I am not buying it... you’ll see why in a second, here are the clues:

The Little(ish) Jellyfish title on a book

Reigned supreme in an underwater kingdom

Fans, Tiara (“princess”)

Angel Fish

Flower Crown

Missed out on normal girl stuff like parties and making friends

Billie Elish “Bad Guy” lyrics in the background= that’s way too obvious for it to be Billie Elish

4. Broccoli 🥦

Performance: His performance of House is Rockin’/Whole Lotta Shakin Going On by Stevie Ray Vaughan/Jerry Lee Lewis was not what I expected to be honest. I thought it was going to be someone younger or a rapper, but it was an older gentlemen, and he was rockin, not gonna lie. I really liked it, not my favorite though I don’t think he is bad by any means. Anyways, I feel like I know who it is... maybe I am getting this from another person on YT’s guess who I really liked (Shoutout to them idk their user sorry)

So, for my guess for the Broccoli, I think it is legendary singer...

Paul Anka

The reason why is because of the following clues:

Can of Soup= he won a Campell’s Soup competition and that jump started his career

Tik Tok reference= his song Put Your Head on My Shoulder went viral on Tik Tok

Also, the letterman jacket is very 60s which is his era I guess (my mom knows more ab it than I do)

Anyways, that’s it, guys! I hope you enjoyed this recap, I apologize for how long they are, it’s kind of my thing lol! Don’t forget to comment your guesses (do you agree with me? Disagree? I wanna know below... especially Jellyfish guesses bc I have no idea who she can be), like, and follow for more Masked Singer content. I’ll see you all next week for the Group C Playoffs! Bye guys! 👋🏼

#the masked singer season 4 #the masked singer #themaskedsinger #celebrities #hollywood #movies #music #tv series #tv shows #wendy williams #lipsmask #bob saget #jordan fisher #paul anka #performance

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guilianafms · 5 years ago

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new york’s very own guiliana rasananda was spotted on broadway street in gucci marmont logo - embellished leather sandals . your resemblance to lalisa manoban is unreal . according to tmz , you just had your twenty third birthday bash . while living in nyc , you’ve been labeled as being doctrinaire , but also pragmatic . i guess being an aquarius explains that . three things that would paint a better picture of you would be the lingering scent of her perfume after she’s long gone , a fenty beauty gloss bomb as her staple to any makeup look , and the glitter of diamond encrusted jewelry on tanned skin .

hello ladies , gents , and nonbinary pals ! my name’s jin and i’m super stoked to be here ! i’ve seen this group in the tags over the years , and i decided that it was high time for me to slide in ( and now that my school’s closed .... indefinitely .... i’ve got the time ) . giuliana is fairly new so i’m still working out some kinks that may arise , but i have a pretty good idea of the direction i want her to go in ! i can’t believe that this is my first time playing lalisa in a couple of years , but since the chance arose , i decided to take it . i won’t chat too much , and i need to make a new d.iscord since i forgot the password to my old one but if anyone wants to plot , feel free to slide into my dms ( or i’ll slide into yours ! )

basic information .

FULL NAME : guiliana kanya rasananda .

NICKNAME(S) : gigi , lia , liana , ana .

BIRTHDATE + AGE : february 12th + 23 .

ZODIAC : aquarius .

HOMETOWN : new york , ny .

GENDER : cis female .

NATIONALITY : thai - american .

ETHNICITY : thai .

HEIGHT : 5′6″ .

LABEL(S) : the amaranth , the vixen , the trust fund baby , and the princess .

ROMANTIC ORIENTATION : biromantic .

SEXUAL ORIENTATION : bisexual .

LANGUAGE(S) SPOKEN : english , thai , japanese , and learning spanish .

OCCUPATION : socialite , ‘ model ’ , and youtuber / social media influencer .

POSITIVES : clear - headed , assiduous , self - reliant , pragmatic , and cosmopolitan .

NEGATIVES : disputatious , exigent , doctrinaire , selfish , and unscrupulous .

PLAYLIST : roxanne / arizona zervas , bad guy / billie eilish , body / loud luxury ft. brando , nasa / ariana grande , mother’s daughter / miley cyrus , sway with me / saweetie w. galxara , say so / doja cat , mad at me. / kiana ledé , apeshit / the carters , elastic / joey purp , watermelon sugar / harry styles , ain’t my fault / zara larsson , lemon / n.e.r.d. ft. rihanna / nice for what / drake , sugar / brockhampton , icon / jaden smith , zimzalabim / red velvet , come thru / joji , in my head / ariana grande , broke bitch / tiny meat gang , honey / lay , deserve / kris wu ft. travis scott .

biography .

let’s see if we can keep this short , am i right ladies ?

ratana saelim has humble beginnings in bangkok . her parents owned a small restaurant in their neighborhood , and they lived comfortably , but ratana still had to work hard to ensure that she got into college and could stay in college . she often did her homework behind the counter of the restaurant , and eventually went on to attend bangkok university .

she met her future husband at bangkok university , a fellow student named kamnan rasananda . he was studying business while she was studying law . in contrast to ratana , kamnan grew up in an extremely affluent home and was set to inherit his family’s company . he was a year older than ratana , and the two got married after her graduation with her master’s degree . they settled in bangkok following their wedding .

the years passed , and the couple established themselves in their respective fields . kamnan started his own business in real estate and construction , so they decided to expand out of asia and into the states . they made their home new york city , and settled easily into a multi - million dollar penthouse on the upper east side . since they were to focused on their careers , it wasn’t until they reached their mid - thirties when they had their first and only child , a daughter they named guiliana .

guiliana was a beautiful little baby who has an infectious personality while growing up . ratana and kamnan may have been busy people , but they never had an issue with putting work on pause to spend time with their daughter . the couple supported their daughter in everything that she did , and that even included when she turned fourteen and decided that she wanted to start doing youtube videos .

going through high school , guiliana had been a member of the photography and yearbook clubs , and this was at the same time that she started to truly focus on her channel . of course , her content at the time was quite cringy ( shoutout to that one song that everyone used in morning routines ) . as the years passed , she obtained the right equipment to make her content better .

by her senior year of high school , her channel grew to massive numbers . she dropped the makeup videos since she found that she was more interested in fashion than makeup , and was comfortable with sharing her personal style . she got a lot of backlash because she grew up rich and people often felt that she was ‘ flaunting ’ her lifestyle , but really , most of her clothes from the places that were often the rage at the time ( urban outfitters , brandy , etc ) with the occasional luxury piece like a purse or something .

now , she isn’t that active on youtube anymore since she’s grown into more of a socialite , but she’ll still do weekly vlogs , catching up videos , and her fashion videos . despite not being that active , her channel is still growing and has now amassed five million subscribers .

personality .

guiliana has been a part of youtube since she was a fourteen year old , so she’s been able to start ignoring the haters ! quite honestly has the most idgaf attitude towards people who have anything to say about her only showing luxury outfits and such on her channel . that’s all she knows since she grew up in that , but quite frankly she doesn’t care !

out of all of her labels , i’d say she mostly resonates with the trust fund baby . outside of her youtube channel , guiliana doesn’t do much other than spend money and sleep until eleven so don’t expect her to be out there making businesswoman moves .

don’t give her a compliment because what’s the saying ... give her an inch and she’ll take a mile ? that’s guiliana to a T ! she knows that she’s cute and her parents have only ever praised her , so she’s got something of an over inflated ego at times . she can go on and on , so please�� tell her ass to shut up if she starts taking it too far !

headcanons .

a born and bred new yorker , guiliana doesn’t possess a driver’s license . she gets driven around in a bentley bentayga and when her driver’s not available , she exclusively uses uber black to get around the city .

her style is pretty similar to lisa’s where one day she’s exclusively wearing streetwear , another day she’s a bit more feminine , and then sometimes she’s wearing pieces straight off the runway ! when it comes to her more feminine style i think of the youtuber kerina wang .

she’s most comfortable when she’s in her apartment . usually , she’s only wearing a lingerie set ( not the entire thing ) and lounging around . she’ll throw on a robe or something to answer the door , so just call her ahead of time .

i can’t make up my mind on how guiliana usually has her hair ( since lisa switches between long and short ) so we’ll just say that she gets extensions a lot ! currently , i love her long brown hair so click for reference here .

she has no real plans for the future ? she’s kinda of taking it day by day and enjoying her twenties while she has them . right now her main focus is her instagram and her youtube , and she has no real aspirations to do anything outside of that at the moment .

never leaves the house without wearing a pair of heels ? even when it’s cold outside , she’s wearing ankle boots with a heel or the ever elegant over - the - knee boots .

her go - to drink from starbucks is a cold brew with vanilla sweet cream . she doesn’t drink coffee with sugar .

wanted connections .

i’ll more than likely end up reblogging things into the tag i made for these , but since there’s nothing there right now , i’ll just list off some specifics that i’d love to have ! if none of these are to your taste , we could always brainstorm , work off chemistry , or let me know if there’s something that you think guiliana could fill !

i might end up sending this in to the main , but i’d love to have the fiancé that she left at the altar ! truth be told , i kind of feel as though she may have done it simply because she finally realized that things were moving too fast and she kinda of needed to pump the breaks ? she definitely didn’t do it in the best way , but it could be an interesting relationship / dynamic to explore .

she’s been in new york since forever so i just imagine there being a slew of connections stemming from that ? friendships , rivalries , and romantic connections ! idk why i love them so much , but i’d really love for her to have an ex best friend . we can determine why their friendship ended , but i really love exploring the demise of relationships .

my brain is blanking so 🤠 .

#wealthyhq:intro #shout out to the tnu / swt albums #really got me through this FNJSDBFHDS

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haich-slash-cee · 5 years ago

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Being Human (UK)

This is a show that I recommend to people... but I add a lot of caveats.

The recommendation: A werewolf, vampire and ghost are flatmates. This show is hilarious! So much macabre and slice of life humor! And horror and whump!? Also, the show was run by a side-channel of BBC (BBC3) and I guess they had no production money, so the actors mostly look human and they just refer to each other as being a 500-year old vampire or ghost or whatever. Which makes it even better. The werewolf is Jewish, recites a Jewish prayer at least once, and hangs out watching “The Real Hustle” with the vampire. They work in a hospital as janitors. The ghost has a habit of making everyone tea to soothe herself and the flat is cluttered with tea mugs everywhere all the time. Also, people do get fang-y or wolf-y or do weird poltergeist stuff. And gore happens.

Longish post, more below the cut.

PS, this is the 2008-2013 UK version of Being Human, which I hear had a cult following. There’s certainly stuff on Tumblr. I found the BBC version through the US remake of Being Human, but I’m much more charmed by the BBC version. (The US version has the vampire and werewolf as hospital doctors? Why?) Also I watched the show maybe 4, 5 years ago, so impressions are from that.

And the caveats: There’s a lot of sexism which was hard to watch. It’s engrained in the premise and plot and occasional gross sexist jokes. And there’s other problematic stuff in the writing. It’s like having glass shards show up the meal you are enjoying, and it’s why I’m not sure I’ll rewatch the series (or not in it’s entirety, anyway). There’s also a limited spinoff web series called Becoming Human which also had some problems for me, including some gross sexism and fatphobia. (John Boyega from Star Wars does show up as a character in that series, for anyone interested.)

Back to Being Human and overall series recommendations. So the 1st season was good. I kind of forgot what happened in the 2nd and 3rd season (I think they got depressing and slow?). The 4th season picked up again, much to my surprise, and I remember liking the 4th and 5th season a lot. Even though [spoilers] there was a complete cast change by this time. But it worked, somehow. The show did go from at least having one woman of color to having an all-white cast at the end, which was not great. And there’s other racism too.

For people who like their happily-ever-after: uhhh so I vaguely recall that a lot of characters don’t really get a happy ending. Granted, half of them are walking around dead already, so...? Overall, the ending of the 5th season is... Is that a happy ever after? Happy for now? The Bonus on the DVD kind of makes it a happy-for-now with a continued possibility? It’s an acceptable HFN?

.....And now, the notes for all the hurt/comfort people and whumpers:

Holy crap people, there is SO much h/c and whump!?

OK first -- George the werewolf. George’s transformation sequence, SUPER whumpy.

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Also, George ends up naked often, come to think. And he screams a lot during the show, for various reasons. The actor himself, in the bonus DVD interviews I think, cheerfully says something like, “People really like the way George screams, I do too.” (This is like when David Tennant cheerfully talked about how he enjoys playing a character who is unconscious and sick and gets fussed over by people.) And George is a very sympathetic, nerdy character who is easy to feel for. Who occasionally turns into a SNARLY SCARY WEREWOLF AGAINST HIS WILL. As mentioned, I think I liked season 1 George more than seasons 2 or 3.

Emotional hurt/comfort -- so Annie the Ghost provides a lot of the emotional centering, as I recall. Throughout all 5 seasons, all the characters lean on each other for support and there’s a lot of lovely warm fuzzies from that. Also, one of the later werewolf characters, Tom, is generally a sweet kid. I’m glad they didn’t do too much of the transformation horror with him, honestly. George/Russel Tovey could carry that, but I thought Tom’s strong point was looking puppy-eyed and folorn-eyebrow’d and trying to navigate the world with a mix of naivety and half-feral-ness.

Above: exhausted naps on the couch.

Below: Classic Being Human humor. A review of house rules and vampire stabbing etiquette, between Annie and Tom --

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[Spoilers from here on] Okay, so as mentioned, the cast changed over between season 4-5. And to my surprise, I think I loved the new trio as much as, or more than, the original trio. I liked how loud Alex the ghost was. And I liked both Annie and Alex.

Also, I did not expect this either, but I got so interested in Hal! Yo! First of all, Hal is a centuries-old Vampire and speaks/looks like, idk, a Regency Character. And then 19-yr old Tom puts Hal to work at a fast food shop and bosses him around, and Hal’s indignation is hilarious. So already, this is excellent.

And somehow, Hal is very, very whumpy? So: the character of a “vampire who is trying to be good and suffers” is not new, and I’ve encountered versions where I haven’t been interested. (I was lukewarm about Mitchell, the original vampire in the show.) But for whatever reason, I really dug Hal. Maybe, for me, Hal was just the right mix of very serious and earnest but also ridiculous and tragic all at once. (I read some interviews with the actor Damien Molony, who mentioned how he’d done a lot of history and addiction research in to prep for the role. The new trio actors also had a lot of chemistry and fun on sets, it sounds like. So I might be picking up all that.)

Also, Hal is actually two characters -- the ridiculous indignant serious Good Hal who is desperately trying to keep the horrible, rude, murderous, Bad Hal from taking over. But, as one of the show producers, a woman, cheerfully commented in the DVD extras: “And then Bad Hal shows up, which is great, everyone likes a bit of Bad Hal”.

Honestly, why do we even pretend to hide our fascination with the macabre and the whump, when showrunners and actors are cheerfully not hiding it all.

Here’s clips of Good Hal in Season 4:

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Oh, I forgot about this part until I rewatched the last clip -- but at the end of season 4, Hal asks his flatmates to forcibly bind him to a chair, because he’s trying to fight off Bad Hal. Based on my perusing of the whump community, pretty sure that scenario is of interest to someone.

Also notable is the episode “No Care, All Responsibility” (Series 5 ep 3). In one scene in particular, where Natasha has offered Hal a way to control his bloodlust and there’s this mix of vulnerability and power with Hal asking Natasha to put a stake against his heart, I remember thinking -- “I bet a woman wrote this ep and I bet she knew exactly what she wanted”. And I was right, that woman is Sarah Dollard, a queer woman who has also written a lot of other things (including Doctor Who). She also wrote Being Human goofy web extra eps with Alex, Hal and Tom called “Alex’s Unfinished Business” and they are so good ! (Interview).

Also... the opening 3-minute backstory in “No Care...” made me cry. You get a glimpse of the show’s baddie showing real care and emotion in rescuing this little kid (an important character). When this kind of scene is done well, it just gets me. every. time.

Anyway here’s an appearance of Bad Hal (much later), being completely awful, murdering people and turning them into vampires and singing Broadway tunes during this.

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Side note on Vampire narratives. Although Hal’s narrative arc of season 5 was interesting, and I’m aware this is show is urban fantasy, I still have qualms of the show enforcing IRL stigmas/ideas that addition is incurable and addicts are doomed. They’re not. (General overview on NIH page.) Addiction research is a growing field. From listening to NPR and reading articles, my impression is that addiction treatment will change quickly in the next few years. Related to the vampire blood addiction trope, Terry Pratchett covers vampires finding ways to be “dry” (one vampire, Maladict, swaps out blood addiction for coffee addiction) and you can find fanfics about the topic as well. (General link to Being Human Ao3 fanfics, why not.)

Side note on Hal’s dual characters -- recently, I did consider, “Is there overlap with Hal and portrayals of Dissociative Identity Disorder (MPD) folks?” IRL DID people have complained about movies with gross portrayals of people with DID. To me, Being Human’s Hal feels removed from that and closer to a fantasy.... but, I’m also not multi, so.

* Update: after having learned more about plural history, I’m even less sure now. (Note: my opinions are of someone who isn’t plural, as far as I know, so note that.) There’s a number of early problematic movies and books that hugely affected the popular narratives of plural people in the west, and still affect how therapists and non-plural people treat plural people even today. These include the movie “The Three Faces of Eve”, which has the narrative of “Good Eve, Bad Even, and later smushed together become ‘Fixed Eve’ or whatever”. There’s practically a whole lecture series on how the books/movies were made with sensationalism and formulas in mind and pretty gross things. Chris Costner Sizemore, the IRL Eve, had to fight the movie studios in court because the studios claimed they owned her life story. (There’s practically a whole lecture series on early plural history in the west, I might link more information later). Like, even today, multi people feel pressured to hide their plurality because they are afraid singlets or other people are gonna say “oh so which one of you is the ax murderer”, or that they are going to be fired from work. So.

This post turned into a “Being Human seasons 4 + 5 Appreciation Post”. I guess Season 1 and 4, 5 were my favorite. I watched the show through library DVDs, but I think there’s eps of the show on YouTube. The DVD extras are probably on this YouTube playlist?

(Also, there is a pilot episode, with different actors except George/Russel Tovey. I don’t think one needs to watch the pilot to watch the main series; I kind of recall that the main series recycled some of the pilot. There is a funny scene in the pilot where George and Mitchell meet Annie.)

Being Human: a macabre, hilarious, horror-filled, flawed, sometimes dragging, emotional, whumpy, oddball show that I still think about sometimes.

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spaceorphan18 · 6 years ago

Text

Finding Kurt Hummel: 2009

Masterpost

6x12: 2009

And... here we are, back to the start of all the things. I don’t necessarily count this as part of the finale - I feel like this and Dreams Come True were two separate entities that they decided to throw together to make it seem like a two hour finale. But I’m glad that we got this kind of an episode - because I feel like it’s a way to show just how far this show came in it’s short six years. I know there’s discussion as to whether or not this would have been a good ender instead of DCT, and while I do see the appeal of the circular narrative, I prefer how it was aired -- looking back before closing the book for good.

Hello, My Name is Kurt Hummel

The first half of the episode is dedicated to reframing the characters we’ve grown to love and we get to start with Kurt. I kind of love that we spend time with the characters who weren’t developed in the pilot - not only because it gives us a different perspective of the pilot, but because these are the characters who the show gravitated to, and who really became solidified in our hearts. And of course, Kurt gets to go first - because he wasn’t even in the pilot to begin with - and now this character is the male lead of the show. It’s kind of poetic really.

But before we get too deep, I need to point something out. It’s funny to me that we can all look back at things and remember how they were - but there is a reality to the fact that we can never really go back. The truth is - in the six years being on the show, Chris Colfer grew up - going from a slightly chubby-faced kid, into a full-fledged adult. And no matter how hard they try, they can’t undo puberty.

Chris is amazing in a lot of ways - he holds himself inward like he did in the first season, he tries to mirror the same mannerisms, he even tries to speak slightly higher again. But you can’t mask the obvious - this kid is, well, not a kid anymore, and it shows. Just needed to point that out ;)

Anyway - when we open with Kurt, we see this very lonely and sad kid, slumping through the halls, still getting rammed into lockers by Karofsky (and Puck), and talking about how no one notices that he even exists.

I like that he mentions his mom here - that he says she said he was a happy child. And I have to wonder in these lonely days, if he misses his mom more. She was a kind soul - a contrast to his dad’s gruffness, that soothed his unique heart. He could be different - but his mom always loved him. Mom isn’t around anymore, and the world seems cold and lonely.

He mentions in this voice over that he wonders if anyone would notice if he was gone. Yes - Kurt was situational depressed before he joined glee. And yes, he was toyed with suicide -- maybe not to the extent that he’d try anything (he had his dad to look out for - and I feel like that always kept him going) but it was definitely a thing the show wants to point out as real. And in the middle seasons - when Burt says glee saved his kid’s life - this is what Burt was referring to.

Well - lucky for Kurt, as strange and awkward as Ms. Pillsbury is, she does do her job - and she does notice Kurt. And really, let’s give Emma some credit here, because if Emma hadn’t talked to Burt, Kurt probably wouldn’t have joined glee - and who knows what would have happened.

I like the little scene between Emma and Burt. Burt knows something’s different about Kurt - and has suspected for a long time that he’s gay - but really doesn’t want to go there, and still thinks there might be some time for Kurt to grow out of being gay. Luckily Emma kinda brushes pass that and explains to Burt that Kurt’s depressed and might possibly hurt himself. And Burt, being the good dad that he is takes it seriously.

Joining a Team

Hey! It’s Kurt’s old room - complete with weird bird cage chair and a sewing machine. And those very white walls. I’m surprised Kurt hadn’t already redesigned it into something more spectacular - but if he was feeling depressed, well then he probably didn’t feel like doing much of anything. Anyway... Burt comes down to talk to him, and we get little snippets of what their life is like with each other.

Kurt comments about making dinner -- which is what he probably does a lot of the time. He likes cooking, Burt probably doesn’t, so Burt’s probably okay with him doing a majority of the meals. Burt isn’t that comfortable talking about things - but makes an effort (which is huge!). But within the conversation, Burt comments that they’re usually doing their own things and not really being a big part of each other’s lives.

Burt, I don’t think, really knows how to handle the situation - and his solution is to get Kurt some friends, and find something that Kurt’s happy to do. I don’t think yelling at his kid to join the football team is great advice, but I also don’t think Burt really knows what to do in this situation either, and reaches out in the only way he knows how.

It’s interesting to me that Burt comments that Kurt’s basically alone all the time down there in his room. And it made me think about how Burt was probably all alone too - not having met Carol yet, and probably feeling low-key depression (or just apathy) since his wife died. Sure, Burt probably played poker with his buddies every once in a while, too -- but I get the impression that Burt is as lonely and isolated inwardly as Kurt is outwardly portraying. It’s just an interesting dynamic here before they kind of turn a corner in Preggers.

Rachel Berry

Burt made a demand that Kurt has to join something by the end of the week... So Kurt, to his credit at least tries. But first - I’d like to point out Kurt awkwardly needs to find a place to sit for lunch - and through our trek through the lunch room, we’ve got all the cliques and groups hanging around. And this isn’t 2009, this is almost 1989. Everything’s so stereotypical - it might as well have been a Saved by the Bell episode. Oh Ryan Murphy and your issues regarding being in high school that play out through your numerous shows....

Anyway - back to Kurt. He finds Rachel Berry and promptly sits down. And then tells her how wonderful she is (cause he watches her MySpace videos) **headdesk** And this, folks, is what we call retconning because I don’t actually believe that season 1 Kurt would be watching Rachel’s anything. But the show is trying to connect its characters - and set up the Hummelberry friendship, so fine, I’ll let you pass. The revert to early Rachel Berry is pretty funny.

I’m not entirely sure what’s going on with Kurt’s hair during this episode. They kind of go through all of Kurt’s iconic looks throughout season 1 and 2, which may have been the point. Or maybe they forgot that Kurt wore his hair in one way during all of season 1. Hard to say.

Anyway... oh Rachel. Kurt says he needs to join a club and Rachel says speech club is closed (man - why didn’t we get to see Rachel in speech club, that would have been hilarious). But then goes into a whole thing about how glee club is now open and looking for members. And Kurt kind of hangs on for dear life as Rachel rambles on in her run-on sentences.

I should mention, though, a contrast between Rachel and Kurt here, though. Kurt claims he’s kinda toying with acting while Rachel says she’s going to be on Broadway and that’s it - she’s determined and unstoppable. And I think it kind of speaks to their characters. Sure, Kurt does have ambition, but he also is able to put his relationships before his career - while Rachel will do the opposite. Idk - nice little bit of continuity here.

Popular

And... we get Kurt wearing the same, weird, glasses shirt he was wearing in the pilot when he goes to sign up! Anyway, Rachel has agreed to help Kurt with his singing, and of course - they decide to do a Wicked song (nice throwback to the diva-off in Wheels) about making one over to be popular. Could their be a more perfect song for them as their last duet? I think not.

I do like Kurt’s looks as Rachel (through the song) comments on his livelyhood - and how he won’t be an easy case to make over. We do get a bit of that old school Kurt shining through here in his facial expressions. And I do kinda love that it puts Kurt’s making over her in season 1 have even more context, which is fun (whether they intended that or not).

I’m not sure if I have a whole lot to say about the song itself. It’s pretty self explanatory - a conversation about being popular (which is a nice tie-in with the original theme of the show). And it’s also a way for Kurt and Rachel to begin the bonding process (again, even if I don’t fully buy the retcon here).

But more so - this is the last duet for Chris and Lea and they really just sell it. It’s been a long time, actually, since we’ve had a Kurt and Rachel duet - and it’s nice to have again. Their voices complement each other very well - and they have great give and take on stage. This performance just works - is funny, well sung, and all around entertaining. I have nothing but positive things to say about it.

As the show wraps up - Kurt is happy and excited, wanting to do the audition together with Rachel. However, Rachel has this weird idea in her head that you can’t team up to do auditions (even though Tina and Artie totally audition together). Rachel dramatically storms off - claiming that this is show choir and it’s every man for himself. Which is weird... because the purpose of show choir is to function as a full unit, not fight for solos, but I don’t think Glee really ever understood that concept.

Kurt stands there stunned - and again alone.

Mercedes Jones

Well - I’m glad it doesn’t take much to light a fire under Kurt’s butt. Since Rachel isn’t willing - Kurt goes out and seeks someone else (the same day!) - and it happens to be Mercedes Jones - future BFF. Kurt’s already enamored with her (which is adorable), and asks for her help preparing something for his audition.

She thinks he’s adorable (she calls him a pale, sexy, keibler elf - let that sink in for a minute) but she also calls him out for slinking around the school and his loud sense of style. He says that he feels more inside, but isn’t sure how to express it - and we get confirmation that Kurt lets his clothes express himself as a way that he can’t yet verbalize. Well - luckily for Kurt (man does he get lucky having some great women in his life) Mercedes takes pity on him - and decides to help him out -- even picking out his audition song.

Audition

So - we get the reprisal of Mr. Cellophane - what Kurt sang for his audition way back in the pilot. And I love that we get it from the back side. It’s not only a way to hide Chris’s growth into adulthood, but a neat way to show a new perspective.

In case you were wondering what Will’s notes are:

Great Breath Support

Impressive Range

Earsplitting falsetto (Note - does Will or the writers know that that’s not Kurt’s falsetto but his actual range?)

Gay. (Oy, whatever Will, not sure why that’s relevant)

Sweet Kid!!! (Will added the exclamation points)

Hummel Tires and Lube

With all the throwbacks, I’m realizing this is the last time we get to see all these places. Awww....

So, Kurt comes bouncing into his dad’s shop all happy about joining the glee club, and Burt’s excited for him. (I love that Burt thinks Beyonce is a kid in Kurt’s class.) I kind of side eye that a) you can only bond with other people within competition - but from Burt’s perspective I get it and b) the fact that Kurt feels they need a strong male lead. I get that Kurt might not feel confident yet to be a lead -- and that the show wants to bring back Finn (or at least his essence). But I’ve had this issue with the show all along. Kurt (and Artie) can be male leads - just because they aren’t ‘traditional’ doesn’t mean they can’t be. Oy show.

But the real bittersweet (and brilliant) moment of this scene comes at the end - and is a stark reminder of where we once were. His dad is proud of him, and clearly loves him. But Kurt still holds on to a deep secret - that he’s gay. And he just doesn’t know how to tell his dad that. We know what happens - we know that Burt’s going to officiate at Kurt’s wedding to a man some day. We know that everything’s gonna play out alright. But at one point in time - Kurt didn’t know. And this scene really puts us back in the mind set.

Also - I’d like to take a moment to mention that they use all the season 1 scoring - which a nice throwback to season 1, but also in building the atmosphere of the time period. It’s just a nice touch.

Little Moments

Kurt’s spotlight segment is over - but there’s still much more to this episode. As Tina and Artie are figuring out their own auditions (which they’re dared to do) Kurt and Rachel are busy getting lunch thrown on them. Ah kiddos...

[Guys - when they do the throwback to class where the fury is complaining about Rachel - check the chalkboard - there’s a history of Lima there and it’s kinda funny]

Also - Kurt is back to doing stunning background moments, because he storms behind giving a death glare to the punk group Artie and Tina are in - it’s glorious.

First Glee Club Meetings

Hey! It’s our first glee club meeting... Will’s not very good at this, but at least he’s enthusiastic. I don’t fully understand the need for the gloves though.

Of course - everyone’s already fighting over solos. Will at least says they’re going to take turns, but we all know how that’ll turn out. Meanwhile - Will wants to do a medley from Grease (ah, set up I see...) and Kurt raises his hand to do the Sandy part. Remember that weird, awkward Kurt gender stuff - hey it’s back.

And then we get into some really uncomfortable stuff as Rachel says that the solos shouldn’t be about race, or disability, or ‘whatever’ as she points to Tina and Kurt (eesh). And yeah - Rachel - sit down, you are being racist. This is supposed to set up Mercedes breaking down though - and I am glad they finally, even if it’s at the end, address some of the racial stuff with Mercedes here.

Kurt, though, looks annoyed (rightfully) at be labeled as a ‘whatever’ - and looks to Will for some kind of support - or at least wanting to shut Rachel down. But this is Will - and he’ll learn that he’ll never really be able to do that.

Kurt doesn’t say anything here - but let’s take a moment to appreciate Chris’s background acting again. Ah, welcome back to season 1.

Lima Bean

So - Kurt and Mercedes are already hanging out together - lovely! I totally get season 3 Kurt vibes from this scene, but ah well - who cares, it’s cute.

Finn has joined the club by now - and Kurt’s complaining cause despite scenes ago saying they need a male lead - Kurt’s now irritated (as he should be) about being ignored for something more ‘traditional’.

The point of this conversation is kind of to prop up Finn as needing them as much as they, supposedly, need him. Mercedes is kind about the whole thing - and tries to see the positives, while Kurt goes on about being pushed out, and that the popular people seem perfect and don’t have issues. (I feel like there’s some commentary about celebrity culture in here, too)

But what I like is that Mercedes is constantly positive. Kurt’s kind of a negative person by nature - and she does bring out this brighter side of him, which is great! I do think it’s fun that they throw a nod into Mercedes’s crush. Kurt kind of shrugs it off as nothing, but it’s a cute moment.

Also - we get a throwback to Finn saying Mercedes should do the costumes - and Kurt says he’ll be the one helping her do that. Cracks me up that they use this episode to ‘fix’ some weird/minor issues in the pilot. Retcons ;)

I’d also like to point out -- do you know who is standing right behind Mercedes at the moment -- where Kurt can see that blazered back (that he’ll probably see a lot of over his life time - now that I think of it...). BLAINE!!!!

I’m so glad they let Blaine have a little moment in this episode.

We get this super cute inner monologue of Kurt wrestling with himself over his crush on Finn as his future husband makes his way behind him. I love that. I love that they let that little crossing paths moment happen.

Anyway - Kurt’s gotten to Mercedes enough that she’s going to call an emergency meeting about Finn joining the club.

Emergency Meeting

And... we get rather meta in this scene - I love that they mention DSB being a nod to The Sopranos Ending - which was a legit thing I heard way back when.

But mostly, this is where everyone bands together and decides Finn isn’t so bad. Yay Finn! Sure.

Everyone goes around saying how Finn has been kind to them. Kurt references his first scene of the show - being able to take off his Marc Jacobs jacket before being thrown in the dumpster (and then twitches - cause comedy).

As Rachel throws out the message of the episode, and the show, about accepting of each other for being different (sure, fine) we get a camera lingering on Kurt. And - omg. This brings me season 2 feels. And remember the time when Kurt often looked into the middle distance wistfully? Oh kiddos - it does get better. Or it has Bette Midler. Which ever you prefer, really.

But really - this scene, more than any other in this episode, really captures young Kurt. I mean, Chris does angst so well, and it’s a nice little reminder of how this lonely and awkward kid grew into something incredibly special.

Back to the Start

And then we get Don’t Stop Believin’ - as it was way back in the pilot. It’s edited differently, more so to feature Finn (personally I like the original edit better - but I can see why they did it this way).

But it’s a sweet little moment. Remember when this show was filled with hopes and dreams and went out of its way to make people feel special? Remember when this show was an anthem for people who were weird or different or awkward or just plain didn’t fit in? Remember when this show was fresh and not bogged down by baggage and bts drama? For a moment - we can listen to Don’t Stop Believin’ and remember way back when and think about all the possibilities that were open to us.

As a final confession - I would like to say this - I actually like this episode much more than the pilot - and probably would have been more invested in the show had it started with this. But as much as they tried to recreate the feeling of season 1 - they just didn’t capture the dark and grittiness that accompanied it. And this is a pilot to something that would have been vastly different. And that’s okay.

I am glad that we got this episode (I wish they had done more episodes like this, tbh), and I’m glad we got to dig in just a little deeper to Kurt’s story. It’s been a fun journey, and I do think it was brilliant to have this episode right before the end. But as I said at the start - I’m glad it wasn’t.

There’s room for just a little more of the story, time to close everything up....

#finding kh #kurt hummel

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