#if anyone has any other guesses please feel free to add! i'm curious what people's thoughts are

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

In the Bungou Stray Dogs manga it showed that Chuuya was a vampire. I was wondering who could have bitten him?

Mmm. We don't know, really. Guesses have ranged from Kouyou to just a random subordinate.

It'll be interesting when we eventually find out (if we do). Chuuya is a very guarded person who is constantly on threat watch (he's been that way since he was fifteen and he is still that way at twenty-two). For him to be bitten like that in any kind of surprise attack is. Odd. That's why I kind of feel like it has to be Kouyou, since he's at his most relaxed around her and Mori, and she'd be quick and agile enough to bite him before he could have a chance to react.

But I suppose we'll find out. Maybe.

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

TWs for cancer, militant veganism, ableism, classism, and referenced death (due to cancer).

So my teacher has been really weird with pushing pro-vegan food on us for the past couple of weeks, and this resulted in her today giving us a video that in its own description describes veganism as a "secret prevention for cancer and all other so called 'diseases'". Like, great. Guess I'll go tell my friend's family that he didn't have to die from sarcoma at sixteen if he had just been vegan! Guess I don't have to worry about seizures from hypoglycemia by ignoring my vegan doctor's orders about not removing meat from my diet due to the safety risk. How about we go to all the countries where people are starving and tell them that they can just magically get rid of their diseases by going vegan? It's infuriating and I'm halfway to reporting her and her curriculum based off of this, but no one would even listen because no one takes these kinds of disabilities seriously. I mean, really. She even cherry-picked the clip, but even that made claims off of testimonials that the athletes' injuries supposedly healed better.

I don't care if she's vegan, I don't even care if she thinks that I'm being a dick or entitled about it, but by the stars in the sky this is the worst class I have ever taken. She is literally pushing a diet that could kill me and also pushing some ridiculously ableist concepts? And false ones, too.

I don't know. Maybe I'm just overreacting thanks to ADHD, or just triggered by a bad memory. Thanks for listening to my rant regardless. If you have any tips on how to make it through this class, I'd be glad to take them because I'm going to need them.

Hi anon,

I'm so sorry to hear about what's been going on with your teacher. Veganism shouldn't be weaponized like this, and I can totally understand where you're coming from. It can be a healthy and affordable choice for some, but it doesn't work for everyone in terms of accessibility, affordability, and diet. The thought behind veganism is understandable - trying to reduce animal cruelty and unethical production of food, but many vegan products still involve child labor and other forms of unethical or environmentally unfriendly means of production. This isn't to say veganism is bad, but it's not perfect. The notion that it prevents cancer and other diseases sounds dubious at best, and it certainly doesn't sound scientifically supported. I can understand the damage that these claims do, especially on people with loved ones who have passed due to cancer.

I don't think you're overreacting; it sounds quite proportionate to the situation. In fact, I'm curious if this is something you could report to her supervisor, the principal, or dean. Because it doesn't sit well with me that she seems to be teaching harmful misinformation.

If anyone has any comments or suggestions, feel free to add on. Otherwise, I hope I could help, and please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun

[tuiyla]

Wait what is GKM? I’m kinda curious now…

OKAY SO

I wasn't actually here for any of this, I just stumbled across the whole lore when going down the Glee fandom rabbit hole so anyone and everyone please feel free to correct me or add to this. I'm also so ready for people to start discussing this because of the morbid fascination I have with it lmao so don't be shy, anyone who knows what I'm talking about. Research it even just a bit and you'll see why it's a "morbid" fascination.

As far as I know, the story goes that very early on in Glee's run LiveJournal communities started to form. Remember LiveJournal? Yeah no one really does. But those who do will tell you that it was one of those pre-tumblr fandom spaces, before social media was what it is today. And very early on, the Glee Kink Meme started. It was essentially a series of threads where people, anonymously or not posted smut prompts, noting characters and, well, kinks, and others would fill those prompts. That sounded tame enough to me and I am a believer in people being allowed to write whatever they want because it's just fiction and just words, but oh boy looking at some of those threads sure was something.

This is a link to part one, a thread that has 7291 comments beginning November of 2009. Yep, like I said it started early. And then I guess it went up to 26 parts? Right until the end of the show, and in fact looking at it now a prompt was posted as recently as a year ago. I also found this pinboard that makes it much easier to search. Go down that rabbit hole at your own discretion, if you like reading smut then I'm sure you'll find good stuff but some descriptions were enough to scar me. I discovered GKM through a fill on AO3 that, no hate to the author, but was so vile I didn't feel like reading fics for a while after that. Morbid curiosity won out though. It's a fascinating piece of fandom history and I'm sure Glee wasn't the only piece of media with a community like this but it sure seems like it was the biggest one. I can only imagine that a lot of teenagers explored their sexuality through these prompts and fills and to that I say good for them, even if some of this did make me clutch my pearls as if I was a suburban Christian mom. Like, come on, it covered SO much that I'm sure everyone would find something in there they just cannot stomach.

I feel like issuing a warning again and maybe I'm just overselling it a tiny bit but, at the same time, you only need to read some of the headlines to see what I mean. It's... truly an anything-goes kind of thing.

[marshmallowprotection]

Do you still like V after the events of Saeran's after end? Do you think he's horribly OOC in there or do think he's in character?

I hear so many V stans say he's out of character but I dont think so. It you consider what he's done in the Christmas DLC, in Another Story, and in the main routes of Deep/Casual story he's always been obsessed with Rika and always keeps making bad decisions (or keeps procrastinating making a decision) because he's unwiling to priortitize the RFA over Rika. Ray's after end is just a timeline where he decides to stop hesitating and fully commit to his obsession with Rika. Its him making the worst decisions possible.

If anything, its V's own route that feels OOC because I feel like there's too little chance he would stop obsessing over Rika and fall in love with someone else. But those are just my own thoughts and opinions. I'm curious to hear yours.

Personally, I said this when I was going through my initial reaction to Saeran’s AE so you could read that series if you haven’t already because I put it down in a lot more blatant detail. I’ll leave this free from this tag, though, don’t want to add dislike over there when I know a lot of people are hurt and upset. So, let me just say, SPOILERS AHEAD.

I have to say that I don’t think he was out of character. I sincerely don’t. I think was the game showing us truly how far V is willing to go for Rika and how far he had already gone for Rika. Listen, V’s not my favorite person in the world but I’d say that he went through a lot in his life and he has such a specific personality type that we can’t disregard. Both he and Rika were wrong in their relationship with each other. They both did wrong things. 

V is a victim of Rika’s abuse, that is for sure, but V did say and push Rika to lean more into her more violent thoughts. It had a lot to do with his warped sensibility and what he was dealing with on his own, from his mother, to how his personal understanding of love was twisted and fractured. He said it himself in his route that he was obsessed with Rika and that he would do anything for Rika because that love was an infatuation stronger than any drug. 

The Secret Ending, for example. He was willing to come and get everyone from the cabin. I don’t know what he thought was going to happen when he did that or if anyone would trust him. He’s got such a martyr complex that it pains me and I wish he valued himself more and admitted that he needed to stop this and just talk about what help he needed. I understand that it’s fucked up, and all of this is complicated because the boys cannot be found by the government. 

But, he could have told Jumin. 

He could have done a lot of things but he hesitated and got scared and tried to blame himself and do it on his own. He doesn’t want Rika to die. He doesn’t want Rika to go to prison. He doesn’t want Rika to suffer. Yet, he’s seeing how she’s hurting others and hurting herself and spiraling, and... sometimes it’s hard for me to understand why he lied. He doesn’t know about Mika, the AE said that as a fact, and I don’t know when he found out about Mint Eye. 

But, he lies to cover Rika’s tracks? Is it for Saeran, V? Or, is it for Rika? I’m really concerned that I don’t know the answer here. I know that he tries to help save Saeran and get him out, he really does, but he always hesitates and he always reaches and fails, and I don’t know if that’s because he’s doing it to himself by self-sabotaging or because he legitimately doesn’t know how to get him out. 

V’s greatest struggle in life is how indecisive and unsure he is. He frustrates me a lot. I see where he could find himself and where he could open up and be a good person and be happy. I see it. But, he won’t let himself let go and Rika and he keeps burning as Icarus does as he reaches out for the sun. 

In this timeline, we see how deeply V can go if he lets himself commit to that state with Rika. In Ray’s Route, Jihyun saw us commit ourselves to Saeran and believe in him, and forgive him, and forgive Ray for what happened. However, it was our choice to forgive them... and you know the difference between what went down with Saeran and what goes down with Rika? Saeran was willing to say that he fucked up and that he needed to stop, that he needed to grow, and that he needed to change. 

He apologized and he said that if you gave him a chance, he would love you and protect you. You accept that, but he’s still going to be working on that for a long time in his heart because he knows what he did. His willingness and capacity to grow and admit fault make him mature and respectable. Rika is never willing to admit her wrongdoings. 

You saw that play out in Saeran’s AE from minute one and you can’t ignore that fact. When Jihyun went back to Rika. And, you know what I personally thought was going to happen? I thought he was going to take Rika, leave the country, and fucking run and never look back. I thought that he was going to take all of her sufferings and place it upon himself so nobody would ever be hurt again sans himself because he “thinks he deserves to be punished by her hand for what he did.” 

However, no. 

V did not do that. 

V decided that he would fully immerse himself in Rika. He decided that the best thing to do was to take the wrong lesson from what he saw with Saeran and the MC. He stood by Rika thinking that if he pushed or tried hard enough to let her be himself instead of forcing her to be something else, maybe she would have a breakthrough like Saeran did. However, he couldn’t do that and let her go to jail, could he? Nope. So he had to make a deal with the devil. For Rika’s freedom and happiness, he had to hurt everyone. 

He himself says in one of the floating space thoughts that he needed to research how to commit himself to that. V admits that he knows that he’s wrong to go this far with Rika, both of them admit that they know they’re wrong and that they knew it was wrong from the start. 

We can see him on Day 3 with moments where he is... showing this guilt again and showing us that side of him that we saw before he cracked and committed to his fate with Rika. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like they’re dating or anything here, he’s merely giving Rika what she wants because he thinks it will help her and right what went wrong. It doesn’t. They’re both living in her fantasy for her sake. Rika’s selfish wish is a family where they pretend nobody was hurt and if she gets that... well, that’s one of the BEs. 

V has been enabling a lot of her darker thoughts from the start, and for a while, he realized that he had to do something and he tried to do something by trying to go and remove Saeran from that place, but in the end, he felt like there was nothing left for him to do but commit to Rika and suffer in that selfish wish. V is willing to do anything for Rika, even hurt others when it comes down to it. He hurt the RFA and he betrayed them for RIka. 

This is the worst-case scenario for the kind of person that V can become, and I don’t think it was out of character, I think it was just an aggressive reminder of how far you can fall if you let yourself give up and decide to burn all of the bridges that you have for someone that isn’t good for you. I think what I never expected was the fact that V was there when Mother Choi was killed. I never thought he was there. 

I thought he either suspected it or learned well beyond the fact. But, no, he was there, he helped her move the body. He lied and covered her tracks and that was the moment that Rika herself said that she gave up on everything and fully committed to what she and Mika were planning on doing. 

So, from when V started to enable her in the wrong ways by telling her revel in a devil, to the murder (even though it was a self-defense case, it was still traumatic to blackout and cut someone to save your own life), to Mika and the plans for the cult. It was a recipe for disaster. I never thought that V was there when it happened. That just... 

That revelation to me, his willingness to drug Saeyoung, his willingness to let the brothers suffer for Rika’s happiness... this is revealing how far V could go for the person that we all know as Rika. The situation doesn’t always call for V to go and do something to this degree, but there’s no denying that V is a complicated character with a lot of weight on his shoulders. 

He was never my favorite but... I can’t disregard what has been written and that I don’t feel like it was OOC. I just think it was showing us a reality where he could go too far. I realize that not many people are going to agree with me on this front and that’s okay. I don’t hate V. V fucked up a lot and there’s no denying that, I just wish that he never went back to Rika and he came to us for help in the first place. 

I guess this is a bit more lengthy than I intended, haha. This isn’t to be mean to anyone that thinks differently than me. I really don’t want to get into arguments or anything over this. So, please, no discourse over this. 

TLDR; This is just a reality where V went over the edge, and it’s just a possible timeline where he could lose himself to what he long tried to push back against but he ultimately gave up on himself and let himself be fully committed to Rika’s selfish wish. You can see the guilt and exhaustion in his eyes but he just lets himself become the villain because it’s the only way to protect Rika from suffering and the only way to “kind of” protect the boys. 

[jillys-bunnies]

Hey, I just wanted to ask you a question please? Sorry for my english, but I saw you have 2 rabbits (female) and we have also 2 rabbits (female too) and we tried to put them together but they fighted, so I'm interested by the way you did to make them together without any problems, I would like our 2 rabbits being together and playing and all.. I hope you can help me that would be nice because its been months and I cant seem to find anything right Thank you! (Im glad your rabbits look so happy)

my rabbits knew each other before we got them, so i never had any problems, but ive put together a little cheat sheet composed of advice ive heard commonly and have researched. i hope it helps! (and your english is fine, dont worry!)

getting used to each other pre-bonding

heres what saveabunny suggests:

You should figure out housing and bonding areas before bringing a second rabbit home. You will temporarily need a second cage for the new rabbit and a place for that cage, preferably near your current bunny. You will also need to find neutral areas in your house [somewhere your rabbits don’t go and haven’t claimed as territory] where you can do the introductions ... I would have two cages set up for the rabbits side by side, about three inches apart. It is important to keep the cages slightly apart because they will sometimes try to bite each other through the wires ... You do want them in the same room so they can communicate with each other. I will often place the litter boxes on the far side, away from the other cage. Greens are typically placed in the side closest to the other cage. Eating is a social activity and this will force them to be a little social ... it is all right to start with them living as neighbors for several weeks.This gives them some times to get used to each other before you start the bonding.

ive heard very good things about all of these suggestions. heres an additional suggestion from the same article that i havent personally heard much at all about, but you might consider:

Lastly, I have the rabbits switch cages every night. This way they get used to living with the other rabbit's scent and neither gets too possessive about either cage.

pre-bonding health

ensure both bunnies have been fixed for at least 2 to 4 weeks and are in good healthy condition. bonding can be stressful, and if bunnies fight, you dont want them to already be injured or weak.

learn in advance what to watch out for and how to stop fights

its very very important to keep a close eye on bunnies to try to stop bunnies before they start fighting. heres more from savebunny.org:

Look for signs that your rabbit is in attack mode. Typically, their ears will be bent back at a forty five degree angle. What does their tail look like? A rabbit about to attack will raise their tail and appear to be on their haunches. When your rabbit does this, tell them to be nice, and push them a few feet away. Remember- ears back at a 45 degree angle, tail raised up mean your rabbit is ready to attack.

Now there is also the rabbit that will run and charge another bunny. This is fairly easy to read, but you need to intecept them quickly. Some chasing can be normal, as one may be chasing to mount and exhibit their dominance. Last, there is the rabbit that will lie there trying to look innocent, but will turn their head and quickly bite. Those are the hardest to stop, although they are less likely to turn into an all out fight. You will have to read your rabbit's eyes to figure them out.

some dominance establishment, as mentioned before, can be normal, like chasing and mounting (in less formal turns, humping), but should still be gently stopped to prevent bunnies from getting riled up.

its not always possible to stop things in time, so be ready with thick gloves and maybe a thick sweater so you can get in and stop them immediately. rabbits will bite blindly and this will hurt you if youre not protected. ive also seen people encourage the use of spray bottles to stop fights, but im not comfy doing so myself so i cant really speak on that. in the end, its up to you, but i urge you to only ever use spray bottles to stop fighting because its so dangerous for bunnies.

bonding

Find a small neutral area of your house that your rabbit does not use. Some options are the bathtub, a blocked off section of hallway, or an exercise pen in a neutral room. Get your supplies ready- the water bottle, gloves or old sneakers. Place the rabbits in the neutral space and watch them. It is easiest to have two people nearby- one with the water bottle and the other with the gloves or sneakers.

i also suggest not to put a litter box in this neutral space - one could get territorial over it.

ive seen some disagreement about when exactly you should separate the bunnies completely. my suggestion is the first 2 times in a bonding session they try to attack, move them apart but keep them in the same pen. after that, separating them for the day is good - you can try again later.

I would start by letting your rabbits spend 15-30 minutes together on their first date, depending on how it is going. If it is going well, then I would go the thirty minutes. During a normal work day, I would have them date only once. However on the weekends, feel free to try 2-3 dates, 6-8 hours a part. If the dates are going well, then gradually increase the time that they are spending together ... 

While the rabbits may at time appear indifferent to us, the truth is they are sizing each other up to determine if they can trust each other. This is seen by observing the rabbits. They may lay about 2-3 feet from each other. If they weren't interested at all, they wouldn't do this. They are being coy- curious but not quite trusting enough. We've all seen humans play hard to get. Guess what- rabbits do too! With time you will notice the space between them decrease and eventually they will be sleeping next to each other.

If your rabbits are not interacting, look for other signs. Do they seem relaxed? Are they washing themselves? Hopping around like everything is normal? If so, then they don't perceive the other rabbit as a threat.

When the rabbits are curious about each other, they will go up to each other and sniff. One may bow his head, requesting licks. One may gently lick the other rabbit's face. These contacts are usually brief, lasting less than 30 seconds. This is the start of grooming and is an excellent sign. As trust continues to develop, these sessions will increase into true snuggling where they will groom each other. During the first meetings, the buns will often seem a little tense, but as time goes on, they will relax. The first signs of grooming may appear a little rough- almost like chewing or gentle nibbling at the hair instead.

When you see positive signs- whether they just seem comfortable in a pen togehter (while not interacting) or if you are lucky enough to see some grooming, you should gradually increase the time they spend together and the space they use. For example, increase their time together from 1 hour to 2 hours to three hours. Once they can spend several hours together, you might be inclined to move them into a larger room where they can run and play together. This is also an excellent time to put litter boxes in for them to use and feed them dinner together.

You should instinctively know when to move on to the next stage. There is the trust factor- you will find yourself trusting them more each day. The first few sessions you will be with them constantly. Then you may feel like you can run to the kitchen and grab a drink. After many sessions, you may feel as if you don't need to be with them, but want them within earshot. At a certain point you will feel as if they can be together and you don't need to be with them ...

Sometimes rabbits appear to be stuck in a rut and not progressing with their bonding. They have worked out a mutual agreement to coexist, but don't seem to be chummy quite yet. This is where you need to push them a little bit. Shake things up- try some of the tricks listed below. Move to a different location, try a smaller pen, try a larger pen. Try and get them over the hump. If both rabbits like banana, then take some and place banana in the fur near the base of the ears. Since most buns go crazy for this, they will try to lick it off each other. One will think they are getting a treat, while the other believes they are being groomed. Sometimes you need to gently push them forward.

closing remarks

i hope all of this helps you get your bunnies to be friendly! it may take a long time or go quickly. a lot of it has to do with interpreting your bunnies body language and following your gut on when its time to move forward. i quoted from saveabunny.org, but here are more resources if you need them!

sacramento house rabbit society

natalie sullivan and edie sayegs bunny bonding guide

good luck and happy bun parenting! and if anyone has anything to add, feel free. id love to hear from other bun parents!

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

no tws, looking for reassurance + advice

I have NPD and I recently fucked up in a friendship partially because of that. Because of a combination of that and my extreme avoidance issues and me being bad at communicating I ended up causing a situation that hurt both me and the other person involved. I never meant to make them feel the way I did and I've apologized and taken accountability for it, and we're working through it, but I just. Don't know what to do about it on a personal level. I feel really bad about it in not exactly a guilt way but some kind of Bad and it's upsetting me. Even though I didn't communicate like I should have in the first place and that's what caused the situation, I did everything right afterwards to try to fix it/make it better. I feel like a bad person for fucking up even by accident though. And I don't know exactly what I'm feeling or why I'm still feeling it. The person isn't mad at me, though there are still some hurt feelings and problems to work through. Overall it turned out about as well as it could have, but I still feel panicky and gross. I know I should just feel my feelings instead of trying to get rid of them, but I don't like this and I want to stop feeling it and I want to stop thinking about the conflict as much as possible because it freaks me out. Anyways. Yeah. I'm not sure what to do about any of it and I just want to run away from the whole thing again, but that's part of what caused the problem in the first place

Hi anon,

It sounds like you might be dealing with impostor syndrome or something adjacent, where perhaps you feel like you're a bad person despite your attempts to rectify the situation. I'm curious if you think the stigma around having NPD fuels this feeling.

This is a great page about Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy's concept of Irrational Ideas. It's essentially a list of harmful thoughts followed by a bullet list of affirmations that help dispel that thought. I'd like you to read the bullet points under Irrational Idea No. 3. I'll share a few of them here (keep in mind a lot of these were written out in the 60s so it may not use the more inclusive language we have today):

Human beings are not perfect. They don’t have total control over all their actions. In the real world, we all make mistakes from time to time and treat others badly because (1) we don’t know any better; (2) we can’t do any better; or (3) we’re too disturbed. That’s just the way we are. Believing that others must do the right thing ignores the real world. Blaming and punishing someone for a mistake he makes because he doesn’t know any better will not make him smarter.

Blaming and punishing someone for a mistake he makes because he can’t do any better won’t help him to do it better next time. And blaming and punishing someone for a mistake he makes because he is disturbed won’t make him any less disturbed.

We all do lots of things everyday. Some of the things we do are “bad,” some are “good,” and some are neither “good” nor “bad.” The “bad” things we do don’t make us “bad people;” and the “good” things we do don’t make us “good people.”

From time to time it will be you who acts badly, selfishly or unfairly. Just like everyone else, there will be times when you make mistakes because you don’t know any better, can’t do any better or are disturbed. When it happens, you can tell yourself, “Oh well, that’s life! I guess I’m as human as everyone else. I’ll try not to do it again, but there are no guarantees.”

If you can access or afford it, I think a therapist could be a great option for a longer-term kind of help for navigating these issues and gaining a closer insight into your own behaviors or how your NPD influences them. They can also help you process your feelings of guilt around what happened recently with your friend.

If anyone has any comments or suggestions, feel free to add on. Otherwise, I hope I could help, and please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun