#if i wanted my back and knee pain gone forever? sure. call me unreasonable

[ricekrispyjoints]

I just want to spend a week in the mountains and $300k and I don't think that's asking too much

[sup-hoes-its-me]

To Be So Lonely (Gaara x Reader)

A/N: my first ever attempt at a gaara one shot. Essentially, you are permanently disabled due to an accident involving evil jinchuriki gaara, but you never gave up on him. friends to lovers. dramatic confessions. gaara is just so pure and sweet, he deserves all the love and more. perfect baby boy. precious.

ps. this was a very quick write. there may be mistakes, idk. just hopefully someone enjoys.

Word count: 3600 (soo short lmao)

The pair of them walked the aisles of the bakery. He adored how her eyes grew wide when they landed on a particularly shiny loaf of bread or a decadent chocolate cake that she couldn’t help but gush over. Today, after work since it seemed he had a break, he decided he would go with her to the dessert shop she’d been begging him to go visit.

He watched as she hobbled forward on her crutches, leaning some of her weight on walls or tables when she got the chance. He felt genuinely awful. It was his fault she was in that position after all. Nearly ten years ago when she enveloped her in his sand and crushed her leg brutally. He was so lost and hopeless back then, and a mere sparring match was enough to set him off and permanently injure the woman.

He felt like the worst man alive as he watched her walk around, and he followed on soft feet behind her. They were friends. It seemed that even after all he had done, she still cared about him. She walked up to his office the day he became Kazekage, and asked to be his assistant. He couldn’t say no, not with the way she smiled so beautifully at him with those soft lips and sparkling eyes.

Admittedly, he wanted her to be at his side.

She often sat with him in his office when there wasn’t anything too urgent going on, her legs tucked under her and her crutches leant against his desk. She would tell him stories about her day or things that she found funny, and he would listen intently to each word. He adored her voice. It was perfect, the perfect pitch and tone, just enough enthusiasm to blow him away. How she could be so positive when so many things had gone wrong, he wasn’t sure.

He knew that if he asked Naruto, the boy would have the answer for sure. He was so wise with people in that way. After all, Naruto was the reason Gaara was able to change into the man he was today, the man that had Y/N laughing and giggling in the evenings before she went home.

Y/N’s smile was so bright. It practically glowed when she entered the room. He wanted to bottle it up and keep it forever, that is how much he admired her enthusiasm. He couldn’t imagine the pain she went through, and the struggle she goes through daily. He couldn’t imagine the strength she must have to work for him and maintain that attitude that he admired so deeply.

She was so beautiful. He found himself waking up multiple times in the morning with her still on his mind, her eyes and her smile and the way her hair fell around her face. He found himself so lost in the mere thought of the woman, he thought he might be going crazy.

He’d asked his siblings about the situation, on separate occasions, just gauging what two more adjusted people thought of the situation. Each time, they laughed, and told him he simply had a crush on his closest assistant. His sister told him to act on his feelings before she was swept away by some other man from the village. His brother told him she was quite a catch, and he would be lucky if she liked him back. He thought she was only kind to him because he was her boss, essentially. Needless to say, that was a bit rough for Gaara to hear.

He wasn’t sure what he would do if Y/N shared his feelings. She certainly was kind, and the woman he wanted to be with, but he just couldn’t be with her, not after everything he had done. He couldn’t imagine her ever caring for him like that after he took away a huge portion of her mobility. He stole away from her the ability to become a shinobi like she always wanted. He felt like a monster.

There was no way in good conscience, he could accept her affections and burden her with his own. She was too perfect. He wouldn’t ruin her in that way. He couldn’t.

And so he was content just following her around, buying her little goodies here and there to make her happy just one more time before he had to see her off for the night. No doubt, he would dream about her once again tonight, after spending so much time staring into her eyes and hearing her melodic laugh. Sometimes, he found himself looking forward to those nights where she would plague his mind. He could truly be himself in those dreams without any constraint, without an ounce of guilt. He could love her during those nights, and he found himself longing for more and more each day.

She spun around in front of the final glass case in the near empty bakery, and she pointed to some fruit tarts in a little box.

“You want those?”

“Yes, please.”

He pointed them out to the staff, and they bagged them up and slid them across the counter. He got a discount as the Kazekage, and he was more than willing to buy a few things for her. It was the least he could do. Even though he paid her a decent amount for her work, he still felt generous. He liked seeing the way her eyes lit up and her ears perked up with happiness each time he bought her a simple cake or tart. It was so cheap and simple, he felt like he was robbing her. He got so much enjoyment out of seeing her beauty over and over again and all she got was a little dollar dessert.

They walked out of the store, and she sighed, reaching into the bag and taking out the little box. She pulled out the cake and took a quick bite, sighing loudly at the flavor. “Wow, Gaara, this is one of the best ones yet. Try it,” she held out the other side to him.

“No, I’m okay. I’m sure it’s great.”

“Oh, come on.”

He sighed, and took the tart from her hands, taking the tiniest bite from the side opposite of hers. She was right. It was really good. He nodded, his lips curving into a tiny smile as she grinned, giving him a thumbs up. “See, I told you it was really good. I don’t go around picking out crappy sweets.”

“Here, eat the rest. You haven’t had a chance to eat today, have you?” he asked, urging her to take the tart back. She did, and nodded. “You really can’t be doing that, Y/N. It’s not healthy to skip meals like that.”

“I know. I normally don’t but during my lunch break today, I was busy talking to your brother and I lost track of time.”

“So it was Kankuro’s doing? Of course.”

“Oh, jeez. It’s not a big deal. My parents are going to the market today so they’ll no doubt be home with some food for me to eat for dinner. Plus, you got me these awesome tarts for dessert.”

He nodded, a hum leaving his lips. “Still, I’d like if maybe you started eating lunch with me, just so I can make sure you’re getting proper nutrition.”

Her eyes widened, and she began to smile once again. She felt her cheeks begin to heat up from his offer. How could he so casually say something like that? He was never one to really think through the things he said, just saying exactly what was on his mind. “Are you asking me on a lunch date?”

“What?! No-that’s not what I meant,” he blurted out, his own cheeks turning red under her stare. “I just meant it as a friend thing.”

She averted her eyes back down to her dessert, and she took another bite. After giving him a moment of time to cool down, and after she’d swallowed, she replied giddily, knowing it would stir him up once again, “Alright, well, I wouldn’t mind if it was a date thing, just saying.”

He was now nearly as red as his hair, and she burst out laughing. “What?! Y/N, don’t laugh at me!”

“Okay, Kazekage-sama.”

He huffed as he tried to calm down, following as she started off once again to her home. On days like this one, he would walk her home from wherever they had gone, and in turn, he said it was a way for him to see the village. In reality, he had seen the village more than enough time to count, he really just wanted to walk with her home, to feel like he was doing something for her by providing company on the short journey through the streets.

As they approached her home, he knew that this was going to be the end of their outing and he would have to leave her once again. He really enjoyed their time together. It was the only part of the day he looked forward to most of the time, and to see her go always filled his heart with a bit of sadness. It was unreasonable to want anymore time out of her day to himself, but he couldn’t help but want it.

She opened her front door and stepped inside, holding the door open so she could see him standing at the edge of the walkway to her family home. He shifted awkwardly under her stare, one that was absent of a smile and that familiar glimmer in her eye. Things felt serious all the sudden, and it made him nervous.

What had changed all of the sudden? He never expected her next words. They hit him in the chest like a stone, and knocked the air from his chest.

“Gaara, I think I’m in love with you,” Y/N called to the boy standing in her doorway. One outing after another, she found it harder and harder to maintain a neutral guise around him. Y/N really liked him. He was strong. He was a hero. He was a beautifully kind creature whom everyone came to adore.

He stood there in shock, his eyes wide and lips just agape. He wanted her to take back what she’d just proclaimed. He couldn’t accept it. Not when her crutches were right in his view, and her leg was missing right below the knee. He couldn’t handle that confession. Not now, not ever.

It was all his fault.

He turned his head away to the street and sighed, shutting his eyes tightly. “Y/N, I’m sorry.”

“Sorry for what?” she asked, fiddling with the bag of groceries in her hands. It took a lot of nerve to confess to him. It takes a lot to go out and profess your love to the Kazekage and the famous Gaara of the sand. He was a celebrity, practically. He wasn’t simply a childhood friend. She was rightfully nervous.

“I’m sorry you feel that way about someone like me.”

“Gaara, stop. Please. What happened, it’s over now. You’ll never be that same person again.”

He grit his teeth, another sigh coming from behind his teeth. “I cannot accept your confession. I’m sorry, but I have to go now. Please, keep this between us, alright?”

It seemed that the end of their rope was near. He had said what he wanted to say, or what he felt needed to be said. He cared for her, he’d cared for her since he could really remember. She was always kind to him, so beautiful and sweet and generous. Y/N was forever forgiving, and he knew that. He was fully aware that she’d forgiven him for what he’d done to her when he was lost in violence all those years ago. He just couldn’t forgive himself. He was forgiving of those who had wronged him, but to give mercy to the person who brutalized the one woman who’d shown him kindness from the beginning, he just couldn’t bear it.

Gaara was a lonely man. He would always be a lonely man, surrounded by people but always just far enough to protect them. He couldn’t let someone like her become close again and risk something else happening. Even if he was non violent now, what’s to say someone else wouldn’t have a grudge against him and target her?

It was all too overwhelming.

“You can’t deny it, Gaara, you love me too,” she called back to him, quiet enough not to disturb the neighbors but loud enough that it rang out in his chest like a gong, echoing there for a minute. She continued softly, “You can’t just pretend there’s nothing between us just because something happened almost a decade ago. You can’t abandon me, not after everything we’ve been through.”

“Y/N, it’s not that easy.”

“It really is that easy. If you care about me, and I care about you, then that’s all that matters. Forget about my leg, please. I’m over it. I’ve grown used to it, so much it’s not a problem,” she explained, “In fact, you treating me like I’m some injured lamb is the real problem. I’m a strong woman. This injury is nothing when it comes to my sheer force of will.”

He felt terrible, really, he felt like every move he made was the wrong one. He felt like he’d travelled down all the wrong paths with this woman, and she still loved him. Despite everything, she loved him without fault. He was her best friend. The friend who stole her leg from her so young. He was beyond conflicted.

His eyes flickered around the street, and she could feel his paranoia. It would be quite scandalous if someone caught them out here talking about something as personal as this. He was the Kazekage after all, whether he was experiencing normal 22 year old emotions or not.

Y/N grabbed his hand and tugged him quickly into her home. Her parents were gone for the day to the shops, so they weren’t there to intervene, not that they would be too pleased to see their daughter with the red haired boy. Yes, they were proud to have him as their Kazekage, standing strong and tall for the nation. But the injuries he had inflicted on their daughter were a bit too severe to ever completely forgive him. They could never give Gaara their blessing, nor did they truly approve of their friendship. Y/N and Gaara knew this. It only caused his guilt to hang heavier in his chest.

She shut the door behind him, and sighed as she leant her shoulder against the wall, a bit of pressure taken off her sole leg and her arms propped up on the sticks.

“Gaara, how do you feel about me? Really?” she asked.

He wanted to say nothing, to just turn away and pretend he hadn’t heard the question. But he knew that wasn’t an option. He would tell her everything. “I enjoy your company, more than I care to admit. You are so beautiful and kind, I always want you around, especially when work gets rough.”

Y/n stood silent as she let him keep going, to get what he was feeling off his chest. There wasn’t really an outlet in his life to get out all these pent up emotions. He could use a shoulder to lean on sometimes, just as much as anyone else.

“You’re right,” he groaned, “I love you.”

A soft breath caught in her chest at his words. It was true that she had a feeling he felt that way for her, but it was a different thing to hear his words reach her ears. His breathy, raspy voice and the exasperation carried in his tone. The way his eyes refused to meet hers he was so afraid. She felt a shiver run up her spine, and she had to take a deep breath to calm herself down. “Then what’s the point in fighting it?”

“It’s wrong. What I did to you, you’ll never be the same again and it’s all my fault. I don’t know if I could bring myself to look at you everyday knowing that I hurt you so badly. Back then, I didn’t even have remorse. I-I…”

“It’s okay! You’ve changed, time and time again, you’ve shown me that you’re not the same man you used to be. You are so brave and caring and considerate. You care about me and all the other villagers. You changed, and I love the man you’ve become.”

“Does that mean you can forgive me for what I’ve done?”

“I would forgive you a thousand times over.”

“Y/N…”

“You’re the man of my dreams. Please, don’t deprive me of that.”

When his eyes met hers, he wanted to melt away in her arms. She really didn’t care about what he had done, she just wanted him for who he worked so hard to become, the man that Naruto pushed him to be. She raised his arms, and found himself walking right into them. Her head hit his shoulder, and he let out a long shaky breath. “I love you, Y/N.”

“I love you, too, Gaara. I truly do.”

And when she pressed her lips to his, he found himself falling deeper in love with her. She was so soft and gentle in his arms, against his skin, flush and warm like he’d always imagined. He never really expected himself to find someone, not after all he’d done and the man he made himself out to be. He never imagined the kiss of a person on his lips, or the feeling of someone’s arms wound around his body. He only imagined pain.

Yet, here she was. The most forgiving angel in the entire world.

“Y/N L/N, what the hell is this? Dammit, can’t you do this somewhere else, you foolish girl?” a voice called through the door, and when they peered between the curtains, the sight of her mother and father walking up the path to the front door, grocery bags piled in their arms. Her mother’s face was quite red, a small smile gracing her mouth, while her father was another story. Completely exhausted with everything.

Gaara pulled away quickly, his head ducking down so his eyes only met the floorboards. He was Kazekage, why was he so afraid of some old man and his paper sack full of rice? He wasn’t completely sure. All he knew was that Y/N stood there with that beautiful smile, her cheeks puffing out from embarrassment. “It’s okay. They aren’t angry. You might want to head on back home, though.”

The elderly couple opened the door, and he found himself face to face with her mother who smiled, corners of her eyes crinkling. “It’s about time, you sweet boy.”

Her father roared, feeling himself growing hotter with every second that passed. “About time for what, Rise? This man to come in here and violate our daughter-”

“Shush, dad. It was all me this time,” Y/N piped up from the back, which only fueled the fire.

“Of course! You’ve always been so promiscuous, Y/N. How could I expect any less?” he rolled his eyes. “And about you, Kazekage boy.”

“Be gentle, Tanaka.”

“Instead of hurting my daughter, I expect you to protect her as if your life depended on it, you hear me? I won’t have someone coming into my house and hurting my children,” he demanded, and Gaara could only nod. He had never been in a situation quite as terrifying as this one, he had to admit. He felt like he had been caught in the middle of some heinous act, even if it was only kissing the object of his affections. He was more than embarrassed, he thought he might crumble into a million tiny pieces.

He replied, “Of course. I’d never let anything hurt Y/N, sir.”

“That’s what I thought. Now get out of here. You can see your little girlfriend some other time, she has chores.”

“Dad!”

“Enough.”

Gaara nodded to the family of three before opening the door and walking through the threshold. “Goodbye, Gaara!” As he peered back over his shoulder, he was once again stunned by her smiling face, her small hand waving to him as he shut the door behind him. He felt his heart beating faster as he walked down the street back to the Kazekage’s mansion.

Has life always felt this good? He wasn’t too sure. He felt high, like he was floating above the ground with each footstep. Maybe giving the good life, giving Y/N, a chance, was going to work out in his favor. He could feel happiness creeping up his chest and rumbling through his stomach. His cheeks turned red at the thought of his now girlfriend in her home getting scolded by her father, and he couldn’t help but imagine the next day when she would report to his office to pick up paperwork and maybe he could swipe another kiss.

When he walked into his home, he brushed by his brother whose brows perked up upon seeing his expression. “What’s got you looking so whipped, Gaara?”

“It’s nothing, Kankuro.”

“Y/N, right?”

“Maybe.”

His brother's loud laughter rung out in the empty hall. He patted his brother's back with a firm hand, practically congratulating him for getting a girlfriend. It was strange in that way, thinking about it like that. He now had a girlfriend to hug and hold, to keep tightly clasped in his heart for as long as she would allow.

Life was too good. He slept better that night than he had in a long while. All because of this one person who’d wormed their way so easily into his heart.

[missmalice202]

Designing Your Melody: Chapter 08 - Teddy Bear

Chapter 01 - Chapter 07

Chuckling softly, Luka reached up and adjusted the headset over his ears. His clanmates’ voices filtered through his ears and he listened to their petty squabbling. He hadn’t gotten to play as much as he usually did with his friends due to his hectic work schedule and putting in studio time with Jagged. In his opinion, he was long overdue for some time off and what better way to spend it than with his friends?

“Yo, my man, what’s up with you lately? I haven’t seen you online in a while.” Carapace asked.

“Oh, you know how it is. Life gets in the way. I’ve been busy working and practicing.” He focused his attention on his screen, watching his teammates decimate a wave of low level enemies. He hung back on his perch on top of a nearby cliff and picked stragglers off with his bow.

“You sound a lot better today,” Chat Noir commented. “Last time we played, you sounded upset about something.”

With one last perfectly executed headshot, the wave of enemies was defeated. He and the rest of his friends waited for the countdown to announce the next wave to begin. While they waited, Luka explained what had been bothering him. “If you guys really want to know, I was looking for someone, but since I didn’t know where to even begin to start looking for her, I was kind of frustrated.

“Then, just the other day, I learned her name through a mutual acquaintance of ours. When I asked for her contact information so I could talk to her, they told me they had to get her permission to share that info with me, so now I’m just waiting to hear back from them.”

“Oh ho ho,” Carapace said teasingly, “So you’re looking for a girl?” Luka could just imagine the smug look on his friend’s face as he said that. He sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. Sometimes his friends could be such a pain, but he wouldn’t change a thing about them.

“It’s not like that,” he said. “When I first met her briefly, she dropped something that I want to give back to her.”

“It must have been something of utmost importance for you to spend so much time trying to track her down.” He could trust Ryuko’s cold logic to get to the heart of the matter. She often acted as the voice of reason when his somewhat unreasonable friends would get out of hand.

“It is important,” he admitted shyly. “At least, it is to me.” He took a deep breath and prepared to share something deeply personal with his online friends.

“Ever since the day I literally ran into this girl, I’ve heard her song playing in my head and it won’t go away. Even when I’m playing something else, I can hear it in the back of my skull and it’s kind of driving me crazy. I’m hoping that after I find her and return what she lost, I can hear how her song ends and I can get it out of my system.”

Silence greeted his heartfelt confession. While Nino knew that Luka tended to express his emotions in terms of music, the other two weren’t aware of the depth with which he felt things. For Luka, this was the most forthcoming he had been with his gaming friends, but he needed to get it off his chest and it felt right talking to them about it.

“That’s beautiful, Viperion,” Chat Noir whispered, stricken by the intensity of Viperion’s feelings. He was a little envious of how easily he could admit his feelings to others. “Whoever she is is a lucky girl.”

“Chat, like I said before,” he said, exasperated, “it’s not like that. I want her to make me something.”

“Make you something?” Ryuko asked. “I thought you didn’t know who this person was. Why would you want to ask her to make you something?”

“You see, the thing that I want to return to her is actually a sketch she made of an outfit. I think she’s a designer and I want her to make it for me.”

Carapace laughed, “Oh? She’s a designer? Maybe Chat Noir knows her. He is a model.”

Wait, what? Chat noir is a model? Luka hadn’t known this before. They had all agreed to keep online stuff online and real-life stuff offline. But thinking about it, maybe Chat Noir could help him. How many designers out there were named “Marinette”? Not many surely.

“Carapace! You know you shouldn’t reveal your friend’s personal information online!” Ryuko scolded, her usual calm demeanor gaining intensity as she defended Chat Noir.

Carapace, however, was unaffected by her irritation. “Chill, Dudette. I know Viperion IRL and he’s a chill guy. There’s nothing to worry about. Right, Chat?”

“I guess,” Chat says somewhat shyly. “Any friend of Carapace is a friend of mine.”

Luka is somewhat flattered. He’s always felt that there was a degree of separation between he and his fellow clan members. There were times that they talked to each other about stuff they did in the real world that he knew nothing about. They were often vague about the details, but he had figured out over time that Ladybug, Chat Noir, Carapace, and Rena Rouge had all gone to high school together. Rena and Ladybug were best friends and often met up together to grab lunch or coffee when their busy schedules would allow. Chat Noir, Ryuko and Pegasus went to the same university together. King Monkey was friends with Chat and Carapace, as well as being an old classmate of Ladybug and Rena. So, everyone else in his clan knew at least a few of each other in real life. The only one who’s true identity Luka knew was Nino.

He smiled, pleased that his clan members were comfortable with him and trusted him enough to share small details about themselves with him.

Out of the corner of his eye, he notices a notification pop up on-screen: LADYBUG is online.

He sits up straighter and adjusts his grip on his controller, listening to everyone in the clan chat greet her as she loads in. He’d been hoping she would be able to get online tonight.

Just then, the countdown for the next wave of enemies reached zero and the fight was on. Adrenaline rushing, Luka got ready for battle.

-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-

As he was setting his controller on its charging dock, he heard footfalls overhead. Glancing at the clock, he wondered who on earth would be on his houseboat so late. Before he could get too concerned about intruders, he heard his sister’s voice call down to him as her footsteps tapped down the stairs to the cabin. Tension he hadn’t noticed gathering in his shoulders drained away immediately as he relaxed.

He called out to her, letting her know he was in his room. He unfolded his legs and stood up from his bed, leaving his cabin to give her a proper greeting. It had been far too quiet on board with her gone, too.

When he entered the main living area of the ship, he watched as she roller her large, black suitcase to rest next to the bar that separated the galley from the living room. He crossed the room in just a few steps and wrapped his arms around her slender frame.

“I’ve missed you, Jule,” he mumbled into her raven hair. “Welcome home.”

He gently placed his hands on her shoulders and took in her appearance, making sure that she had made it home safe and sound. Other than her purple-tipped black hair being a little mussed from travelling, she appeared to be in good health.

“I missed you, too,” she smiled up at her older brother.

He turned her around and used his hands on her shoulders to push her over the couch where he gently pushed her to sit down. Sitting next to her, he rested one foot on the knee of his other leg and leaned back against the cushions. “So, tell me, how did your photoshoot go? I want to hear everything.”

The Couffaine siblings spent the next few hours catching up and telling each other everything thing they had missed while they had been separated.

-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-

The next day, Juleka made her way to The Tom & Sabine Boulangerie Patisserie to meet up with Marinette to discuss the details regarding her walking in Marinette’s show for Fashion Week. Considering Fashion Week was only a few short weeks away, they had a lot of work to do and she wanted to get a head start as soon as possible.

Bell chiming to announce her arrival, she walked into the bakery and experienced an intense feeling of déjà vu. She hadn’t been here in forever, it felt like. When she and Marinette had been in school together, she spent many a lunch break at the little bakery, but as time had passed after they had graduated, the two girls had slowly drifted apart. They texted each other from time to time, half heartedly making plans to get together and catch up, but something always seemed to interfere with their plans and they had just left it at that.

Looking back on it now, Juleka felt guilty that she hadn’t tried harder to maintain her friendship with Marinette.

Greeting Sabine behind the counter as she walked over to the stairs that led to the DuPain-Cheng apartment above the bakery, she resolved to do better as she ascended to greet her old friend.

Looking around Marinette’s room, Juleka was a little surprised at how little had changed. The most notable change that had taken place was Marinette had removed all of the pictures of Adrien that had been hung all over her walls. I guess that ship has sailed, she mused to herself. If she was honest with herself, it was probably for the best. The way Marinette had acted around him was frustrating and plain sad at times.

Scolding herself for such judgmental thoughts, she looked at her friend, currently hunched over her sewing machine, oblivious to her entrance from the trap door.

“Hi, Marinette,” she greeted softly.

Apparently, she was so focused on her work that she hadn’t heard her. Juleka walked across the room and tried again.

“Marinette?” she said once more, placing her hand on her shoulder to get her attention.

And she got it. Marinette jolted backwards out of her chair at the touch and flipped right over onto her back, stunning herself in the process.

“Juleka!” She winced as she sorted herself out and got to her feet. “Oh my god, I wasn’t expecting you so soon!” She grabbed her hands and held them, truly happy to see her friend for the first time in years. “I thought you were on location for a photo shoot?”

Marinette led them to her pink chaise, where she encouraged her friend to sit. “Tell me everything. How have you been? Are you and Rose still together? How’s your modelling going? How’s your mom doing?”

Juleka giggled softly at her friend. She really had missed Marinette’s energy. “I’ve been good. Rose and I are still together and she actually recently asked me to move in with her-“

Marinette’s enthusiastic squeal made her wince. “Juleka, that’s amazing! I’m so happy for you. When are you going to move in?”

She reached behind her and grabbed the pink, polka-dotted teddy bear sitting at the head of the couch, hugging it to her chest as she averted her amber eyes away from her friend’s eager gaze. “I don’t know. I wouldn’t feel right leaving my brother all alone on the Liberty.”

Marinette tilted her head, brows furrowed in confusion. “Brother? I didn’t know you had a brother.” She tucked a stray piece of her midnight black hair behind her head. “Why did you never mention him when we were in school?”

She held the bear closer to her chest, ducking her head to mumble into its plush head, “He’s two years older than us and when we were in school, he was usually off doing his own thing. He had his music to occupy his time and whenever you came over to hang out, he was usually out performing in a park somewhere.” She gazed at her friend through her long bangs, eyes shining with humor. “I’m actually kind of surprised that your paths never crossed before.”

Marinette giggled. “Well, now that we’re going to be working together, you’ll have to introduce us. I’d love to meet your brother. You guys seem really close if you’re willing to stay with him instead of moving in with Rose.”

She paused, recalling something else that Juleka had said. “Wait a second, you said if you moved out, you’d leave your brother alone on the Liberty. Where’s the Captain?”

Her eyes widened. “Oh, I forgot to mention that Mom’s travelling around Europe right now. She said that she was feeling tied down, being moored in the same place all the time. So, she decided to go on what she called “an inspiration quest”. So, Luka and I are holding down the fort until she gets back, whenever that is…” she sighed.

Watching Juleka talk about her brother made Marinette a little envious of their relationship. There were many times over the years that she had wished that she had a sibling that she could share the kind of bond that the Couffaine siblings obviously shared with each other, but between Alya and Adrien, she figured that they were as close as any true siblings could be.

Shaking off her melancholic thoughts, Marinette asked Juleka if they could get started with getting her measurements so she could begin working on the women’s line of her collection.

As Marinette wielded her measuring tape, the girls used the opportunity afforded to them by working together to catch up on everything they had missed in each other’s lives over the years.

Promising to get together soon to just hang out and not for work, the girls bid each other goodbye. On her way out, Juleka stops at the bakery counter and buys a box full of madeleines and assorted macaroons for her brother to sample when he got home from work that night.

He had told her all about the issues he had been having at the record label last night and she wanted to do what she could to help alleviate some of the stress he was obviously feeling. As they had talked, Luka had grabbed his guitar and played a bit and Juleka couldn’t help but notice how discordant some of the notes had been, making it obvious to her trained ear how upset her brother truly was. To the outside world, it may have appeared that nothing could really get to Luka, but she knew him better than that.

Feeling confident that the box of treats she had bought for him would at least put a smile on his face, she left the bakery with a spring in her step.

That night, after a long day doing deliveries and an even longer evening spent at the record label, and exhausted Luka stumbled on board and looked for his sister.

Instead, he found a white box with “The Tom & Sabine Boulangerie and Patisserie” emblazoned on the top with gold foil. Opening the lid, he saw it was full of his favorite pastries, as well as a note from Juleka.

Luka, I’m staying with Rose tonight. Don’t wait up for me. I visited a friend at her parent’s shop today and thought you might like some of the best pastries in the city. Don’t stay up too late. Love, Jule.

With a soft smile at his kind-hearted sister, he reached into the box and picked a pink macaroon. Biting into the sweet confection, he closed his eyes and let out a soft moan, the delicate raspberry flavor exploding in his mouth. She wasn’t kidding when she said they were the best pastries in Paris.

He looked at he lid of the box one more time to commit the name of the bakery to memory. He’s definitely going to have to look them up sometime and sample some more of their goods if the macaroon he was eating was any indication of the quality of their food.

Opening the lid once more to grab a handful of buttery madeleines, he made his way back to his cabin to play the happy tune the tasty treats his sister had left for him had inspired.

-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-

Chapter 09

*Can I just say that I love the dynamic between the Couffaine Siblings? They’re just so supportive of each other and I just can’t with these sweet children haha.

BTW, ask and you shall recieve @unabashedbookworm . I saw you couldn’t wait until I posted the next chapter, so I got it out as soon as I could (insomnia? pfft, what’s that? lol)

As always, until next time, my Lovelies XOXO*

[kusunogatari]

[ Frozen Flames and Shadowed Lights || Chapter Eleven ] [ @yukaikokoro @abyssaldespair ] [ Uchiha Obito, Suigin Ryū, Uchiha Madara, Hatake Kakashi, Kottakawa Kumiko, Raziya ] [ Verse: Divine Light ] [ Previous || Next ]

Two days later, Ryū hasn’t eaten. Has barely slept. Though hardly granted much freedom beyond her nook before, she now remains tucked into its furthest corner, curled into the smallest form she can manage.

He’s starting to get worried.

Just as diligently, Tobi has continued to bring her her meals, lead her to the other ‘rooms’ of the cave she needs, and has even risked sitting as he did before Madara discovered their pastime. But she remains despondent, not even looking up when he enters. Her food sits and grows cold.

Part of him understands, and yet...part of him doesn’t. And it frustrates him to no end…! Until now - until her interference - he’s had no reason to question things. Madara’s every word and action has been gospel, no inkling in his mind telling him otherwise.

...and yet…

Now, he finds questions burrowing into his brain where there has always been mindless obedience. She called Madara’s treatment of him wrong...cruel. Refuted it and insisted he deserved kindness. And all after she herself faced the man’s wrath for interfering in his punishment.

It had brought a spark of...something to his chest. It felt hot, like fire...but there were no flames. And it left him wondering where such a reaction came from.

In his short memory, he never recalls feeling it before.

And then there was what he told her. About needing her kindness. He knows it’s true, and yet...why? He had no need of it before. He wanted for nothing before they met. And yet now, whenever he has another task to tend to, or a place to teleport...his mind remains back in the cavern, in her nook. It’s like a string that gently yet insistently tugs at him whenever he’s away.

And before, being in her presence was...pleasant. Her reading, though a simple gesture, brought forth an excitement and yearning he’d not yet known. Never before did he have something to look forward to. A reason to complete his tasks beyond the tasks themselves.

...but now, being with her is...is…

...painful.

He decides he doesn’t like her like this. It’s...wrong. And it disquiets him, somehow. Even if he doesn’t understand why. But he doesn't know how to remedy it. He brings her meals like before, sits like before...but nothing seems to help.

...will she be like this forever? The notion leaves him deeply unsettled.

The morning of the third day, he finds her as he left her: leaning back into the corner, eyes fogged with something he can’t know.

And he decides he has to try something new.

“...you need to eat.” The words are given lowly, holding out the bowl.

She doesn’t move. Doesn’t even blink.

“...Ryū, you must eat.”

The only sign she still lives is a slow, shallow rise and fall of her chest.

The disquiet in him grows to the point of making him shift in discomfort. Though he hasn’t dared it yet, he breaches the edge of her blankets, carefully approaching until he’s close enough to touch her. 

Still no reaction.

His chest tightens to an unreasonable degree. “Please.” The word is croaked desperately, only made harsher by his rasping tone. “You...you worry me.”

Finally, her eyes lift to look to him somberly.

“I...I don’t like to see you like this. If you don’t eat, you’ll start to wither.”

“...maybe that’s what I want.”

“...but -?”

A soft sigh escapes her. “...you don’t understand,” she whispers. “If I keep on, I’ll…”

“Can you explain? I want to understand.”

He’s never needed a reason before. For...anything.

She curls up tighter. “...that man - Madara? - he...he wants to do something horrible to me. Something that...will not only hurt me, but possibly hurt everyone. And he’ll treat me like an object in order to do so. It won’t matter that I tell him no. And that...that scares me,” she admits in a whisper.

Conflict rises in him. Treated like an object...no use in saying no...why does that sound like his own circumstances? Why does she seem so averse, and yet...he’s never had any inkling to question it?

What is he missing?!

Shifting carefully, he sits just beyond her bent knees. “...I was told his plans were necessary.”

“Did he tell you why…?”

“...no.”

She studies him, eyes flickering across his face. “...you’ve never wondered…?”

“...I…” That same uncertain feeling rises in him. “...I had no reason to…”

“...you really don’t remember anything, do you…? It’s so strange. You’re like...a doll. No thoughts or feelings or memories of your own. I’ve never met anyone like you…”

“...is that...wrong?”

“...it gives me a bad feeling,” Ryū admits softly. “But...I don’t know enough. And I don’t want to make a wrong assumption. But…” Her brows wilt. “...all I do know...is that what he’s doing to you is wrong. He mistreats you, Tobi. You’re not his...partner, or his friend, or even his ally. It’s like you’re a tool. And no one should be treated like that.”

He sits and tries to think, mind full of swirling, conflicting thoughts. “...I don’t know.”

“...I’m sorry. I don’t mean to confuse you.”

“...until now, I’ve had no reason to doubt, or to question. But you…” He sighs, a hand at his brow. “...you unlock thoughts I’ve never had before. Questions. And it feels like something is...is missing…”

“Your memories, I’m sure. Whatever, or whoever you are...it’s clear Madara erased it. Made you into something...blank.”

“...do you think...I can remember…?”

“I don’t know. But I hope so. It’s cruel for you to be without your past.”

The pair fall into an uneasy silence. Tobi sits, one hand at his brow and the other still cradling her bowl. When his frustration - unable to make sense of this - grows too great...he tries one last time to offer it.

Ryū’s eyes lower to the food, and after a long pause...she reaches and accepts it.

And for a moment, their fingers brush...and Tobi feels static run up his arm to his chest, where it pulses.

“...thank you,” she murmurs, taking a spoonful.

“...you’re welcome.” As she eats, he feels something in himself ease, still watching her mindfully to make sure she keeps going. Nor does he move, remaining perched just beside her. Once she seems steady in her pace, he takes to watching the entryway, wary of being discovered.

So when he hears a faint rustle of paper, it takes him by surprise. Head turning so fast he nearly grows dizzy, he sees her pull out a book.

Their book.

For a moment she seems to consider it, but then heaves a breath...and starts to read.

Relief washes over him like a tide.

From there, Ryū slowly seems to improve. One day at a time, she regains her appetite, and color in her cheeks. Though still muted, her melancholy seems to shift to quiet contemplation.

He wonders what she’s thinking of.

“Where...do you come from?”

Looking up, she pauses. She’s yet to begin reading today. Their time together has been far more fragmented, both of them wary of Madara’s intrusion. “Well, I...I don’t know. There’s much from my childhood that’s foggy. All I really know is what Rin and Kakashi have told me.”

Deep in his chest, there’s a hint of a flicker. He decides to call it curiosity. “...who are they?”

“I...guess you could call them my guardians. They’re not much older than me, really. Rin tells the story of them trying to help my mother fight off el’tahl hunters, and taking me in after she died. They lost a friend that day, too...a boy named Obito.”

Another flicker, this one ever so slightly stronger. “...he died…?”

A somber nod. “They fled the city that night to protect me...Kakashi had lost an eye, which my mother replaced with one of the boy Obito’s. He was el’ven...and it granted Kakashi igni. He eventually parted ways from us, and...Rin raised me in a little town, trying to keep me hidden.”

“Why?”

“There aren’t many people like me left,” Ryū sighs. “It’s...a long story. A lot of history. But...she was afraid people would try to use me. And...I guess she was right.”

Ever so slightly, Tobi wilts. “...but you were in the Luxerian capital when...I found you.”

“Yes. Rin and I traveled to Salustia a few years ago. I...decided I wanted to try and revive the Council of Elements: a meeting of representatives of all twelve elements. And since I was presumed to be one of - if not the - last disciples of Luxeria, I was the only one who could open the city from the barrier that protected it. It took years of planning, but...I managed to do it. And Kakashi returned to be my advisor, and protector.” A sad smile flickers across her face. “...they’re like big siblings, really. Him and Rin. I used to consider them my parents when I was young, but...well, now that we’re all grown it seems a bit odd.” The smile then fades. “...I wonder if they’re looking for me…”

He doesn’t have an answer for that.

“...I feel so foolish. I keep asking myself if I could have done anything different to prevent this. I feel like it’s my fault...and now, with my ven sealed, I have no way to try and change my fate.”

Tobi watches her carefully. Something, in the back of his mind, seems to be pounding from the other side of a door, at the end of a winding corridor. Faint, and yet… “Is it...truly so terrible?”

“What?”

“Being...here.”

Her greys flicker over his face. “...I was taken against my will. Madara’s plans for me will steal my future...and maybe that of everyone else. I have no freedom, no way to return to my home, or my family. I’m...trapped.”

Part of him is not happy to hear that. If she weren’t here...if they never met...then he -

“Tobi!”

Flinching at Madara’s barking command down the cavern, he jumps to his feet. Something in that tone makes his chest clench.

...something is wrong.

Beyond the cave, battered and blown by the storms of the snowy peaks, Kakashi keeps his face buried against Kumiko’s back. Even at his fastest gallop, his mount has never gone as fast as Raziya streaks among the peaks. Add in the buffeting of the headwind itself, and he’s amazed he hasn’t simply been blown from her saddle and smashed against the ice below them.

With the weather so violent, getting close enough to the mountains to try and sense anyone within them has been dangerous. More than once, they’ve nearly been thrown against the crags. But Kumiko wasn’t lying: it’s clear she and her drach partner have practiced flying in even the worst conditions. Each time they grow too close, the dragon manages to pull away.

At the front, Kumiko’s brows are furrowed against the cold, ven steadily trickling as she uses it to shield herself from the wind and snow. Even so, ice clings to her forelock and lashes. “Anything yet?” she calls against the squall.

“Not yet,” Raziya reports, her mental call far clearer than her rider’s voice in the whipping winds. “But there is much of the range yet to search!”

Heaving for breath, Kumiko replies, “We may have to break soon - even with my ven, the storm’s taking too much of our body heat.You could go on for days at this rate, but we’ll freeze to death in a few hours.”

Behind her, Kakashi feels his heart clench. He’s already come close to that once on this journey. Doing so again is far from appealing.

“Tell me when you wish to land, and I shall -” With a jerk, Raziya flutters in an attempt to stop, far from still as the winds try to toss her. “Wait! Do you feel that?!”

“What?”

“A large cloud of ven, not far!”

“I can’t feel it yet - can you get closer?”

“Yes, but -” The drach hesitates. “It will likely be dangerous.”

“Likely little more so than staying out here much longer,” Kumiko calls back. “Close the gap!”

At the words, Kakashi dares to look out, one hand sparing to reflexively grip at the hilt of his blade. Though already unsettled, his heart pounds in his chest.

They must be getting close…!

Raziya continues fighting the storm, and eventually even Kakashi can feel the buzzing disruption of energy in the air. Squinting through snowflakes the size of his fist, mismatched eyes then widen at what he sees.

A rippling shroud of black seems to stretch across what appears to be the mouth of a cave. Like a starless night, it seems to swallow light...and the snow vanishes into its depths.

“What is that?”

“A Tenebreon barrier, if I had to guess,” Kumiko calls back, tone fringed with worry. “If we touch it, we’ll be dissolved to less than dust. A Luxerian barrier reflects...but Tenebreon consume.”

“Then what do we do? They have to be in there!”

Kumiko bites at the dry, windswept flesh of her lip. “Neither of us have any skill in terra...or I would suggest tunneling in from the side. But I doubt either of us could manage it. I might -”

“Look out!”

With a jerk, the three of them suddenly dive, the humans clinging to their mount as their hearts leap to their throats. Where they’d been a moment before, a flurry of snow catapults off the mountain: enough to bury them ten times over.

“The snowpack is unstable! We must be cautious!” Raziya warns. “More could collapse at any moment!”

“Can you divert it if it does?”

“...I can try.”

Ever so slowly, they try to edge closer and get a better look. And the nearer they get, the more the hair on Kakashi’s neck stands on end. The pull of the ven is terrifying.

...and soon, they realize, more literal than they first assumed.

“Raziya, we’re getting too close. We’ll have to find another way in,” Kumiko calls.

But even as the drach pumps her wings...they don’t make any headway back out into open air. “I...I can’t retreat!”

“What?!”

“It’s pulling me in!”

“...a black hole,” Kakashi mutters, heart dropping at the realization. “Between the pull of the barrier and the push of the wind...we’re being sucked in!”

Tensing, Kumiko plants her hands against Raziya’s neck, trying to help give her energy by granting her own. “You’ve got to change course!”

“I-I’m trying!”

As they draw closer, Kakashi stares at the barrier...and like a shadow, he can barely see the outline of a figure beyond the shield.

And something about it fills him with dread.

“...Kumiko, I’ve got an idea. But you aren’t going to like it.”

“Tell me! We’re running out of time!”

Beneath her, straining until her muscles pop and joints crack, Raziya foams at the mouth. The sickening power of the barrier is almost overwhelming.

“NOW!”

Watching from behind his barrier, Madara grits his teeth. While the possibility did indeed exist of being discovered...the fact that it’s only been a few weeks...irritates him. They’re in the corner of the world, in some of the most inhospitable terrain of the continent. How did these fools find them?

“Madara, what’s going on?”

“Someone’s stumbled upon our little hideaway,” the man growls at his companion, ignoring his flinch. “And we may have to clean them up.”

Following his master’s gaze, Tobi watches as the looming shape struggles against the pull of the ven. “...seems it won’t be long until that happens.”

“Indeed.”

The pair of them jolt, however, as a faint but deep rumble sounds above them. “...what?”

Like a waterfall, snow and ice cascade just beyond the sealed mouth of the cave, burying the would-be intruders and sweeping them down the mountain face.

Shocked, Tobi moves to the edge, trying to watch through the dark shroud of the barrier.

“...well, that should take care of that,” Madara muses.

“...what happened?”

“Avalanche. The snow collapsed off of the peaks. The weight of the new snowfall must have proved too much. A fitting burial for them.” Turning his back, Madara then calls, “You’d best feed the lux mage. She’s still thinner than I would like. I want her kept at a fit weight before her cycle turns. She’ll be needing the extra energy.”

Tobi doesn’t reply, watching him retreat. The ones beyond the barrier...were they the people Ryū spoke of? Rin and Kakashi?

...why did the avalanche make him feel so...panicked? If it were them...then there’s little hope now of her being rescued. Which means she’ll stay here, with them.

...with him.

...and with Madara.

Like two ends of a rope pulled taut, duality and indecision tear at him. In part, he’s happy she won’t be taken. And yet...he knows being here hurts her. But if she leaves...surely he’ll never see her again.

Would she even want to see him again…? Does she...hate him? Surely not. Not with how she defends him. But...why does she do that? He’s just as much her enemy as Madara, and she clearly hates him...is frightened of him. But he himself was the one who brought her here, helps keep her here. So why…?

Unsure and agitated, he turns on his heel from the shield and makes to follow his orders. Ryū needs to eat. But...what will he tell her? Should he be honest? No...he shies from that. Something tells him if she were to know their fate, she would fall back into that hopeless despair.

And he cannot bear to see her like that. Not again.

For now, he’ll spin half-truths. Tell of the avalanche...but not of those caught in it. Besides, he can’t know it was the pair she hopes for. Surely that will be enough to assuage her. 

As per usual, a basic stew is all he can afford her, thinking over his story as he returns to her ‘room’. He prays she won’t needle him too deeply.

“Is everything all right?”

She’s still in her mess of blankets, looking up in question as soon as he turns the corner. He sees her tuck away a book, shifting her focus entirely to him.

“Avalanche,” he responds, crossing the gap and kneeling to offer the bowl. “Madara feared it may affect the barrier.”

“Oh...did it?”

“No. It rolled over and down the mountain.” Watching her, he catches the wilt of disappointment as she accepts his offering. “...even if it had, we could have recast it.”

“...I know. I just...hoped.”

Studying her closely, Tobi asks, “...if...you were to be freed...what would you do?”

“...do?”

A nod.

“...I’d return home, of course. Back to Salustia. Surely by now the Summit has ended, but...hopefully Suigin held it in my place.”

“Who is that?”

“My drach kirav - my dragon partner. She is a child of Luxeria. Surely with me gone, she took the mantle and kept the Summit going. I hope it went smoothly…”

“Is it so important?”

Ryū looks up to him in surprise. “...of course. There hasn’t been a proper summit in over a hundred years, when the war began.”

“...war?”

After a pause, she sighs. “...I forget how little you know. But now isn’t the time to explain. It’s a long and heavy tale. Like most of history.”

“...I see.”

She chews slowly, thoughtfully. “...maybe someday I can teach you more. After all...it seems I’ll be here quite some time…” is her somber note.

“I...would like that.” As a silence blooms, he then blurts, “And if you were to leave?”

“What?”

“If you were ever to leave...would you still teach me?”

Ryū stills, studying him with an unreadable expression. “...I...suppose that depends.”

“On what?”

“...on many things,” is her vague reply, which frustrates him. 

“But would you?”

“...I would. But maybe you already know these things and just...forgot. Until we know what was lost in your memories...” She trails off to silence.

Tobi sighs, clearly still agitated.

“...what’s wrong?”

The truth would only make things worse. “...I don’t like this blank slate in my mind,” he offers instead.

“...maybe someday we’ll fill it again.”

Out beyond the barrier, the snow is finally still. Caught in a crag dozens of meters down from the cavern, the newly-tumbled tons reflect the rising moonlight like a billion crystals.

And then, with a flare of flakes, a hand lifts from the mass. Like a rock dropped into a pond, the snow disperses outward to create a crater. Standing in the middle, still peppered with white, Kumiko heaves for air alongside a knelt Kakashi.

Not far away, Raziya bursts from the snow, shaking like a drenched dog to dislodge what clings to her fur.

“...that...was the craziest thing I’ve ever done,” the glacial mage admits, dropping to her knees to catch her breath.

Beside her, Kakashi manages a weary chuckle. “Well...it was either that, or get disintegrated.”

“You’re still a madman.”

“True...but we’re alive.”

Resting back on her haunches, Kumiko stares up at the cave above them. “...so...we need to be a bit more stealthy, it seems.”

“Indeed. Any ideas?”

“Raziya can’t come with us - for one, getting us in will be hard enough, let alone something her size. True, she can take her mor form...but she’s far less effective with her ven in that state. She might not fit once we’re inside if she were to try to change.  And two, they’ll still be able to sense her as easily due to her saturation of energy. Her presence is just too obvious. And it’s as you say: we need the element of surprise in case they decline a fight and decide to simply teleport elsewhere once they realize we’re there..”

“So we go in alone. But do we know how to go in at all?”

“I have an idea...not as mad as yours, but hopefully viable. First, however, we need to get back up there, and without Raziya’s help.”

“What should I do?”

“Wait here. We may need to make a desperate escape. Be ready at a moment’s notice, my friend,” Kumiko offers.

“Very well.”

“So how are we getting up there?” Kakashi asks again.

“With a little ven. Here, stand next to me. Keep your knees bent - it’s going to be a little...loose.”

“...what?”

“I’m going to urge the snow back up, but it’ll be a little unstable. Think of standing on a ship.”

“...wonderful.”

“Just don’t fall off.” Adjusting her stance and letting Kakashi do the same, Kumiko then feeds ven into the snow beneath them before lifting her arms. Following her guidance, it starts rolling back up the incline in reverse.

Kakashi’s stomach can’t help a small turn of its own, and he’s immediately reminded of why he hasn’t been on a ship in quite some time. “I...think I might vomit.”

“Just a little longer - hold on.” Sliding up the peak, Kumiko brings them to a stop along one edge of the cave, several meters to the right to avoid the barrier’s pull. Maintaining their height, she spares a hand to gently clear away snow until the mountain itself is exposed. “All right...step off here.”

Eagerly doing as he’s told, Kakashi glances around. “...now what?”

“Now...I’m going to give you a little science lesson, Kakashi. Do you know why we don’t make much use of stone roads this far north?”

“...no, enlighten me.”

“Because the freezing and thawing of water causes cracks. Water seeps into any divet it can find...and when it freezes...it expands…” Ven melting some of the snow, Kumiko guides it into a gap in the earth. Then with an urging, it freezes...and Kakashi hears a soft crack. “Over time, with each freezing and thawing...the crack widens. And eventually...you’re left with little more than rubble.”

Watching with widening eyes, Kakashi can only stare as Kumiko carves a tunnel through the earth and stone of the mountain face with only a few gallons of water. “...you’re amazing, did you know that?”

Grinning, Kumiko just keeps going until - after uncounted minutes - light and warm air slips through a gap.

The pair glance to each other, each nodding and preparing themselves for whatever might lie ahead.

     Holy mother of overdue chapters, Batman! This is...well, very late :’D But since I’ve decided to just go full-blown hiatus from RP for July and just...take a breather, I thought I’d try and finish up some WIP fics instead while I have some spare time / energy. Maybe not...fully taking a break, but...tbh fic writing is almost always easier for me than RP for...some reason.      ANYWAY, a bit of a cliffhanger cuz...honestly I was going to have a whole other scene in this chapter but it was getting...really long :’D I’ve been trying to keep chapters between 3-4k, and this was just over 4k, and uh...yeah it would end up a monster if I kept going. And there’s a LOT of plot in this next scene. So I think just...better to wait and let that stand on its own. And that means MORE CHAPTERS anyway, so...y’know xD Total word count is almost to 38k so that’s neato!      BUT YES. We are...SO CLOSE to a possible reunion...? But things are about to start hitting the fan. We’ve got “Tobi” having FEELINGS and starting to question the unquestionable. We’ve got Ryū being that big depressy, Madara still being a jerk, aaand Kakashi and Kumiko getting ever so slightly closer (in more ways than one, huehue)...! So the next chappy SHOULD be pretty excitinggg!      I am going to DO MY DARNDEST to finish this fic by the end of July. As my plotting stands now there should be four more chapters, but uh...the last two ended up having to be split into four, so that’s...probably not accurate x’D BUT either way, this is my main goal for July writing-wise. I will DO MY BEST!      For now tho I...need to eat, then I’m get right back to it ÒωÓ *dashes away* Thanks for readinggg!

[raelwriting]

A Long Night; A Long Life

Word Count: 1,366

This is what happens when I spend most of my holiday playing Vampyr, enjoy :)

The pain, strong and pulsing, was the only thing I could really focus on.  Of course I could see the colours, the people.  The noise they made was almost unbearable.  I could feel everything.  The cool night air coated my lungs, it was a graceful distraction from the pain.  That was it, just the pain, and the cold.  The cold was great but the pain, greater.  There was so much of it.  It would be impossible not to at least think about it, never mind try and figure out how to stop it.  Many sharp pains in many places.   The most noticeable was the sharp pain on the left side of my neck.  It made me want to curl up and not get up again.  I knew that was unreasonable, I should have been home fifteen minutes ago.  Yet there I lay.  Unable to move due to the pain feeling like a weight crushing me.  Breathing hurt, moving hurt and as strange as it may sound, thinking hurt.  My brain felt like it was being crushed against the outer walls of my cranium.  

At the same time I was feeling extremely parched.  The thirst rivalled the pain.  I wasn’t sure which one to start with.  Debating this caused me greater pain.  As I lay there I knew I had to pick one.  Otherwise, I was going to die and I couldn’t decide which way was worse.

I decided the thirst needed addressing first.  After all, if I could just get rid of the thirst then the pain would be the next thing to address, I knew the thirst would be easier to take care of.  At that moment I feared the pain would exist forever.  It sure felt like it.  For every occasion it seemed to dull, it returned three times as strong. Eventually it felt like time to attempt getting up.  Pushing myself from my side onto my knees took almost all of the strength that I had, and nearly forced me back onto my side.  At least lying there I knew that the cold might get me rather than the pain.  That seemed tempting.  It would be over soon.  If the pain was anything to be going by then it should have been over a long time before I reached this point.  I just wanted to die, to be put out of my misery. No.  My family couldn’t handle another death right now.  My father had been killed three weeks ago, if I joined him now my mother may not survive the heartache.   I hesitated on my knees for a few moments, trying to gather all the strength I had left, I would not get to my feet if I didn’t.  I still wasn’t convinced I was going to manage this alone and nobody seemed to be paying me the slightest piece of attention.  As if a young woman on her knees with blood flowing from her neck was a common sight around here.  That thought was scarier than the thought of my death. Pushing myself up onto my feet was even worse.  I almost toppled myself three or four times.  I knew that I had to get up.  Getting up was one step closer to being able to walk away from all this.  I also pleaded with the pain to be duller when I was on my feet.  That was not the case; in fact the pain was even more overwhelming than it had been previously.  I was overwhelmed, how I wished that someone would take pity on me and help me.  Nobody was there, I knew that I had to do this alone.  So, I took three big deep breaths before trying to move anymore.  I knew I had to get used to the pain, if I was to get home. Next, the attempt to take a step.  My knee almost folded under me and I was nearly back to stage one of this process.  I knew that if I went down there was no way that I was going to be getting back up.  I kept the thought of my mother in my head.  I wad doing this for her, if she wasn’t expecting me to return home I may have died there.  

A handle rail.  Roughly three feet in front of me, I just had to reach for it.  Before I could wrap my fingers around the cool metal, someone placed a hand on my shoulder.  He made me jump and I temporarily lost control.  I regained control a few seconds later and it was the weirdest thing.  The stranger now lay where I had been before getting to my feet.  I felt stronger, the pain was dulling, the thirst almost completely gone.  I let go of the handrail.  Fully expecting to be back on the floor; but a newfound confidence in myself pushed me forward.  I was almost tempted to skip back home, I was elated to be myself again.  I could move every bone, every ligament, every joint and feel no pain.  The uncomfortable throbbing on my neck was the only thing that truly reminded me that at any second this euphoria may pass and I would be struggling again.  

I was three streets away from my home when I first noticed it.  People were staring at me.  I was pretty used to this.  People used to stare at me more.  I didn’t really look like a lot of the people that lived in my village, apart from my family.  I looked a lot like my brother; same hair colour, eye colour and posture.  When he had become a doctor people stopped staring at me and instead began asking to pass on messaged to him, asking for a consultation on their sick relative.  He had been drafted to fight in the war and so had not been around recently.  People generally avoided me after that.  Perhaps feeling awkward for using me as an unofficial secretary.  Or they could be concerned that no news was bad news.  I guess most times it was, especially when there was a war going on.  

Then I got married.  Then he died, so maybe they felt sympathy toward me for that.  

No.  In this case it may have been the blood that seemed to coat the front of my dress.  I wasn’t sure where it came from, or even if it were mine.   I held my head high as I walked through the streets leading up to my house.  Ignoring the prying eyes of neighbours.  Once I was in my room and changed into new clothes I would be fine, I might have a cup of tea or something warm before leaving the house again. After walking in the door, I caught sight of myself in the mirror beside the coat rack.  I was pale.  Not sickly pale, but worse than that.  The blood didn’t seem to be only on my dress, I noticed traces of it on the corner of my mouth, looking as though it had been smudged or wiped off.  No way.  That stranger in the street.  I killed him.  His blood was what I was wearing, not just my own.  They don’t exist.  They were part of a fable, a fairy-tale designed to scare children into behaving, adults didn’t fear them.  They called them leeches, hunted them down for sport.  Nobody ever found them though.  

I had to leave before my mother came home, I refused to put her in any danger.  The grief may be too much for her.  I could live with that.  I would not let her death be by my hand.   So, I had made it home.  Safe.  Warm.  Yet, it quickly became clear, I should have remained on the cobble-stone streets, dying.  I would no longer welcome here, when my mother figured out what I was.  That wouldn’t take long; my thirst was not for water.  The blood I wore that wasn’t mine confirmed that.  Time for me to disappear, but nobody could predict how long that would take me.  Could be years, decades, centuries; even millennia but now?  Now I had all the time in the world to find it.  A new home.

[vagrantblvrd]

Nobler Things (1/1)

Summary: This isn’t the worst assignment Michael’s ever had, but there are moments when it ranks right up there with the time he was stationed in the ass-end of nowhere literally watching paint dry.

Only, you know, somehow worse.

Notes: Because reasons.

(It's been forever since I've written for the Stargate fandom, and so many liberties were taken with this. So. Many. /o\)

AO3

This isn’t the worst assignment Michael’s ever had, but there are moments when it ranks right up there with the time he was stationed in the ass-end of nowhere literally watching paint dry.

Only, you know, somehow worse.

“Dig Squad, how’s it going?”

Michael groans, sharing a look with Alfredo who’s leaning up against the cave wall like an asshole. Stupid grin on his face and so damn amused by this shit.

Dr. Haywood sounds distracted. Like whatever “once in a lifetime find” he’s studying is more important than checking to see if his teammates have been horribly killed in the caves he sent them down into half an hour ago.

“Peachy,” Michael says, ignoring Alfredo’s grin. “Everyone still alive up there?”

Lindsay’s up top with the military component of various gate teams, so he’s not worried about the eggheads too much.

Still, there’s a thing about tempting fate out here, and a long track record of teams not making it home because they got too overconfident. Forgot that for all the strides they’ve made since the SGC came into play, the universe is a big place and humans are still scrambling to catch up.

Lot of people out here who have it out for them, and even more trouble waiting to be discovered that doesn’t care which side they’re on so long as they die, so.

“No signs of pretty rocks down here,” Michael says. “No shiny doodads, either.”

Alfredo coughs into his shoulder to muffle his laughter, and Michael can’t help his own little smirk at the bewildered silence from the good doctor.

Brilliant guy, Ryan, but when he falls into egghead mode he tends to forget about other things. Gets all caught up in what he’s doing, all that brain power dedicated to science, and things like social niceties suffer for it.

“Uh...”

“Seems safe enough down here for the moment, though,” Michael says. “We can bring one of your teams down here whenever you’re ready.”

Another pause, and then Ryan’s back, all excited nerd over some rocks, but hey, not Michael’s place to judge. (If it was, though, he’d have so much to judge. So. Much.)

“Alright, alright, we’re on out way up. See you in ten, Doc.”

“Thank you, Major,” Ryan says, quiet and sincere. “I really do appreciate it.”

Michael ignores the look Alfredo gives him when Ryan thanks him. Too much honesty in it like the idiot’s not used to someone in a uniform actually doing his damn job.

Which.

It’s easy, okay? All he has to do is make it easier for Ryan to do his job, and everyone’s happy.

None of this this bullying the eggheads when Stargate Command isn’t looking, cowing them into submission the way some assholes do.

“Michael.”

Michael gives Alfredo a grateful look for breaking him out of that little spiral, and clears his throat.

“On our way up now, Doc.”

=======

The thing about the SGC is that they snatch up all these lunatic scientist types from all over.

Ryan’s a prime example, this idiot with a brilliant mind and so damn stupid about everything.

Used to working with the military because they offer the shiniest toys, but real bad at figuring out how normal people interact.

And then there’s fucking Gavin, who – Michael doesn’t even know what the idiot does, just that he’s the stupidest smart person he’s ever met.

Trevor, who is a horrible human being, and worst of all, gets along too damn well with Alfredo.

The two of them just meshing perfectly after Alfredo signed on, and now everyone is suffering.

“Christ,” Michael mutters, watching the Twins walking past, giggling.

The mess hall is mostly empty at this hour, recently returned teams like Michael's taking a moment to grab  something to eat before they tackle mission reports and other bullshit.

Beside him, Ryan chuckles, like Alfredo and Trevor could ever be up to anything good.

“You worry too much.”

Michael rolls his eyes and stabs a baby carrot a little more aggressively than he meant to, fork scraping his tray with this ungodly noise.

“And you, asshole, don’t worry nearly enough,” Michael snaps.

Because this is Ryan he’s talking to, the fucker huffs out this little laugh. Leaning his chin on his hand as he watches Michael. All soft and fond and shit, and Michael kind of hates him for it.

He hasn’t been on Ryan’s team all that long, less than a year by this point, but for a gate team like theirs, it’s a long damn time.

Missions gone wrong and more than enough close calls for a lifetime, and for whatever reason they just pick themselves up and go do it all over again.

And Ryan, okay.

He’s so fucking smart, and so fucking stupid at the same time.

Put up with some piece of shit push him around because then at least he could still go through the Stargate, visit other worlds and play with advanced alien tech. Like someone was doing him a favor, instead of realizing the General would never stand for that kind of behavior from one of his people. That bastard Grant was the exact kind of person the program didn’t want.

But that was what made Grant so damn successful. Fucking with the scientists until he’d ended up on Ryan’s team and someone finally did something about him. Figured out what Grant had been up to all this time, a pointless power trip for a small-dicked bastard.

“Well,” Ryan says, slight southern drawl to it, and this amused little smile on his face. “That’s what I have you for, isn’t it?”

Michael's eyes narrow.

“What I’m hearing,” he says, fork aimed at Ryan’s face. “Is that you want more time in the gym for sparring matches because I swear to Christ, Doc, if you pull another stunt like you did on Volcano-world, I’ll shoot you myself.”

Ryan makes a face at that because hates it when Michael or the others force him to learn to defend himself. Like they’re asking for something so completely unreasonable for shits and giggles and not because they want to stay the fuck alive.

“That’s not what I’m saying at all,” he protests, but it’s weak at best because he’s not entirely stupid.

Knows if Michael doesn’t drag him down there Lindsay sure as hell will because she likes having a partner in crime around to torment others with

Michael shrugs.

“Yeah, well. Work on your fucking words, then, asshole.”

========

“So,” Ryan says, sounding tired and pained and like he’s just had the shit beaten out of him, which. You know, he has. “I feel the need to confess something.”

Michael thumps his head against the rough brick of the wall at his back, manacles rattling.

It hasn’t been a good day for either of them.

P3X-whatever was supposed to be uninhabited. No need to inadvertently offend the locals as Ryan poked about the old ruins with his fellow eggheads.

Michael indulging him as they followed a signal Ryan picked up on one of his gadgets. Leaving Lindsay and Alfredo kept an eye on the others, and then bam, fucking smugglers.

Mean looking bunch with stolen Zat guns. Michael's warning to Ryan coming too late to help, and now here they are.

All chained up with nowhere to go, and he hopes like hell the others are okay.

“Is now really the time for that?” Michael asks, trying to slip his hand through the metal cuffs around his wrists again. He can get out of them, but it’s going to fucking hurt.

There’s no answer, and when Michael looks over Ryan’s watching him with this oddly serious look on his face.

“I knew what Grant was doing,” Ryan says, eyes dropping away from Michael’s. “But the General was dealing with the Trust’s latest attempt, and we’d just lost two gate teams.”

Michael isn’t sure he wants to know where this is going.

“And Grant,” Ryan says, more venom from him than Michael’s ever heard. “He got some of my people killed on a mission. I’m sure you know which one I’m talking about.”

Michael does.

He’d read every mission report of Grant’s he could get his hands on when the bastard was exposed, when Michael found out he was going to be getting his team.

A mission over a year ago now, with Grant’s previous team. A Goa-uld attack that where Grant was the lone survivor. Hailed as a hero and not the lying bastard he was.

“Doc - “

“People like him underestimate people like me,” Ryan says, pushing himself up to his knees, determined look on his face. “And that’s always a mistake.”

Michael’s watching Ryan closely because right now he’s not the awkward egghead he’s gotten to know.

The idiot who gushes over stupid shiny, glowy rocks or a fancy piece of alien tech. The moron who can’t block to save his life, and the idiot Michael’s shared a coffee with in the mess hall late at night when all their close calls and losses get to be too much and sleep is an elusive fucker.

Ryan looks dangerous, this edge to him he’s never seen. Someone who takes his responsibilities to the scientists working under him, would do something really fucking stupid for them in a heartbeat.

“Doc?”

Ryan smiles. Blood on his teeth and this faint wheeze to his breathing because the fuckers worked him over good, convinced he had information they wanted.

“It took some time,” Ryan says, and he reaches for his shirt pocket, pulls out a little metal key, smiling at the look of shock on Michael's face when he recognizes it. “But if you’re patient, people like him ruin themselves.”

Ryan leans in close as Michael twists around to let him get to the cuffs.

“They just need a little push in the right direction,” Ryan says, and with a quiet click, the manacles open.

Michael pulls back as he massages his wrist to get circulation going again, and can’t look away from Ryan. Still too fucking close, this look in his eyes.

Not the mousy little egghead everyone knows him as right now, and it’s honestly a little terrifying.

Everyone knows you don’t antagonize the scientists because they’re all smarter than them and have ways of making you suffer in the smallest, pettiest ways. Know how to bend the rules just so that they don’t face reprimand, and when it comes down to it a scientist is more valuable than any idiot who knows how to shoot a gun.

The smart ones do, at any rate. The ones who have a healthy respect for what the scientists do, who aren’t complete idiots or twisted little monsters.

Making an idiot out of any of them is a bad idea, but try it with Ryan? You’re fucked.

“You’re a fucking idiot,” Michael says, because what the actual fucking hell? “It doesn’t matter what was going on, the General would have done something if you’d just fucking said!”

Ryan blinks, clearly not expecting that reaction.

“...What?”

Michael sighs, because maybe Ryan is the stupidest smart person Michael knows. Gavin, at least, wouldn’t pull this kind of shit. (Probably. Christ, wait. He would, and fucking hell, Michael regrets ever befriending any of these assholes.)

“You get that our job is to look after you assholes, right?” A gross simplification, but come on, Ryan’s a moron. “That includes protecting you idiots from people like Grant.”

Or should, anyway, and thank God General Ramsey believes wholeheartedly in that or things would be so much more different. (The Trust would have gotten what they wanted, and everything would be fucked.)

Ryan has this unreadable expression on his face, and it’s making Michael uneasy. Worried that Ryan thinks he’s lying to him, but that’s around the time the explosions start, so, you know.

Not a lot of time for meaningful discussions.

Later though, once Lindsay and Alfredo are done teaching these smuggling bastards a lesson.

========

Ryan avoids Michael for the next several days, always leaving the room just as Michael enters it and other Scooby Doo bullshit, so he takes drastic measures.

Goes down to that dark, dank, little lab Trevor inhabits like some kind of horrible little goblin.

“I need your help,” he says, and feels like he’s signing over his soul at the way Trevor’s eyes light up. “Ryan’s a goddamned idiot.”

Trevor cocks his head to the side.

“You know,” he says, like he’s not sure if this is a good thing or not. “I’ve heard the same said about you.”

Michael scowls, because it’s sounding a hell of a lot like their scientists don’t trust them to police themselves.

And that's a problem, because it means there might be more bastards like Grant hiding in plain sight, and they’re too stupid to see it for themselves. That their scientists are too afraid to come out and tell them for fear of repercussions, which.

Kind of the reason Michael needs to talk to Ryan, because the other scientists look up to him for some godforsaken reason.

Trevor must see some of that in Michael’s face, or maybe Ryan’s being a menace again, who fucking knows.

“Alright,” he says, but you didn’t hear it from me.”

========

There’s a little storage room below the labs.

Quiet, out of the way. Leaky pipes overhead that had them pulling everything out of there until it gets fixed, so of course it’s been six months with no progress on that front.

It’s also where Trevor’s directions lead Michael.

Inside, Ryan’s working on something. Laptop humming away, and this wide-eyed look on his face when he sees Michael.

“Hey, Doc,” Michael greets, annoyance and residual anger draining out of him at the sight of Ryan’s face.

He’s a damn mess, all horrible bruising and a brace on his wrist. Hunched down into this little ball and looking as close to vulnerable as Michael’s ever seen him.

Hiding out with his laptop and a six pack of diet soda - generic store brand, so Michael knows it’s bad – and his scruff is starting to look distinctly hobo-ish.

“Major,” Ryan says, eyes darting to the door as it clicks shut behind Michael. “Is there something I can help you with?”

Michael watches him for a long, long moment, and sighs as he folds himself down to a sitting position where he is. Doesn’t want to get too close to Ryan because he looks jumpy, but hell if he’s going to let bastard run on him again.

“Lindsay and Alfredo interrupted our little heart-to-heart back there,” he says, lips witching at the grimace that crosses Ryan’s face. “And you’ve been super busy since we good back, but I figure now’s a good time to talk.”

Ryan locks himself down again, blank expression as he sits up straight, proper posture and all.

“Or not,” Michael says slowly, because pushing Ryan is never a good thing. “But I want you you to understand if something like Grant happens again, you can go to the General if you feel like can’t talk to me about it. Don’t fucking put yourself at risk the way you did.”

Grant was a real piece of work, and they’re still trying to untangle everything he did. This horrible suspicion that he’d personally dealt with people who were going to go through the proper channels and report him. (That his former teammates weren’t killed by the Goa-uld after all, and the attack gave him the perfect alibi.)

The whole situation is fucked, and Michael doesn’t blame Ryan for what he did, just wishes it hadn’t been necessary.

“Geoff gave me a choice,” Ryan says, and whatever is on his laptop must be fascinating because he’s not looking at Michael. “After...Grant. Showed me the files for prospective team leaders, members. He said after everything I deserved to choose for myself, for the others.”

Unorthodox as hell,  but that’s the SGC at its core, when you get down to it. You either lean to adapt once you get here, or you flounder, no in between.

Grant’s - Ryan’s - team is structured a little differently than most gate teams. Military team leader and two subordinates and Ryan, as well as Gavin and Trevor when their expertise is needed.

Headache inducing, but they’re usually not on first-contact missions. Go to planets other teams have vetted as safe for further exploration to let the egghead run wild with adult supervision, so it works, for the most part.

After Grant, the General had the military component of the team reassigned, and Michael was given Lindsay and later Alfredo when he joined the SGC to round out the team.

“…And you chose me?” Michael asks, not sure what to do with that because he knows what he is, alright. A loud-mouthed idiot who’s somehow managed to survive this long. No prize when it comes down to it, nothing special that should have caught Ryan’s eye over the other prospects. “Why?”

Ryan gives him a look.

“Gavin likes you,” he says simply, like Gavin’s opinion of him should hold so much weight. “More than that, he trusts you.”

Gavin’s an idiot.

Ryan’s lips quirk up, and Michael scowls as he realizes he said that out loud.

“You’re not wrong,” Ryan says. “But his judgment when it comes to people is rarely faulty.”

That’s a lie, but Michael lets it slide, because Ryan has a point in there somewhere.

Gavin’s not a hundred percent on people, but he’s better than most Michael’s seen. Has enough people at his back that there has to be something to what Ryan’s saying.

“And you’re the stupidest smart person I know,” Michael says, because the guy needs to know this.

Ryan snorts, tension bleeding out of him.

“Fair.”

And that’s about as close to talking about this whole mess as they're going to get for now, Michael knows. Ryan’s just going to talk around it, exhaust Michael until he gives up, and he’s not interested in playing that old game at the moment.

“The hell are you down here working on anyway?”

Ryan glances at his laptop, like he’d forgotten he had it.

“Uh.”

“Ryan.”

Ryan grimaces as he turns the laptop to show Michael what seems to be a compilation of cat videos.,

“Gavin sends them to me when he hits a wall on his work,” he explains, looking sheepish about it.

The odd friendship Ryan and Gavin has continues to baffle Michael and everyone around them.

“Huh,” Michael says, because he’d been expecting something along the lines of Ryan obsessing over his latest finds or reading an academic paper. Not watching cat videos.

But, hey. It’s not Michael’s place to judge. (He is though, hardcore)

“Move over,” Michael says, and doesn’t give Ryan time to protest as he sits next to him.

On the laptop screen there’s a tiny kitten struggling to climb a set of stairs and screaming about it to the world.

Ryan freezes when their shoulders brush, and for a brief moment Michael’s concerned he’s crossed a line somewhere. Managed to offend Ryan somehow, but then he huffs, adjusting the laptop so Michael can see the screen better.

The two of them are busy people, fate of the world on their shoulders and the shoulders of everyone here and however else that goes, but -

The world’s not going to end if a pair of idiots like them watch stupid cat videos for a while, and they deserve the chance to take a few minutes to themselves when they can.

“Shouldn’t we - “

“No,” Michael says. “The others have things under control. Shut up and watch the dumb kittens.”

Trevor knows where they are if something happens or someone needs them, that’s good enough for Michael.

“Okay,” Ryan says softly.

And if Michael’s being a little bit selfish for the chance to get the idiot to himself like this? Well, that’s his little secret.

Just the Same

[wolfypuppypiles]

Love, Hope, and Misery: Chapter 6

Alec looked down at the large scar over his chest. It was huge and pink, healed by Magnus' capable hands but it would never go away and he knew it. He was lucky it hadn't gone through any of his runes, although his other wound had. 

He glanced down at the bandages still covering the knife wound around his iratz rune. Izzy had stitched it and Magnus had used some spell to ease the pain but the scar would forever stay and the rune could never be used again. 

He wasn't exactly sure why, but the knife the seelie had used, and the way she'd cut him, made the rune useless. Now that his permanent iratz rune had been destroyed, he couldn't create another that would stay for more than a few hours. 

Izzy was trying to figure out what she'd done to cause such a strange reaction, but for now everyone had agreed that Alec could not get hurt again, and that, he'd have to heal the slow, mundane way. 

Alec pulled his shirt down on his chest carefully, trying not to jostle his broken ribs too much. He was still badly bruised from Izzy’s CPR, as well as his brief fight with the seelie before he was drugged. 

But he was feeling much better than he had before, and Izzy deemed him healthy enough to leave the medical wing, so he was going straight home to Magnus' apartment. 

The warlock came in then, holding a glass of thick green sludge and a handful of pills, with a black hoodie wedged under his arm. 

"Here, drink this and take these." 

Alec grimaced at the concoction in the glass as he took the small handful of pills. 

"What is that? Is that alive?" 

Magnus made a face and pressed the drink into his boyfriend’s hand. "Of course not, I killed it first. Would you just drink it, please? It's to promote healing and calm the mind. And those pills are from Izzy, they're antibiotics." 

Alec groaned in annoyance but did as he was told, suppressing the urge to roll his eyes as Magnus pressed a hand to his forehead. 

"I don't have a fever, Mags." 

"Calm down, I'm just making sure. Put this on and then we'll get going." 

Alec took the hoodie offered to him and accepted Magnus' help putting it on. He was still weak and healing, but that didn't mean he couldn't do anything himself. 

He went to get off the bed, only to have Magnus stop him with a hand to the chest. 

"Are you sure you're ready? Maybe you should just for a little longer." 

Alec groaned, throwing his head back. "Magnus! I'm fine! We're just going home so I can go back to bed, it's not like I'm going on a hunt or anything." 

Magnus raised an eyebrow. "That's right, you aren't going on a hunt and you won't be for a long time. You're going to stay with me forever and never go back to those dangerous missions." 

Alec was about to protest when the warlock placed his hands-on Alec's cheeks, being careful of the graze still healing over his jaw.

"You can't so no to me Alexander, you love me too much." 

Alec laughed as magnus used his kitten look, that 'up through the eyelashes' with a little pout, look that Alec could never resist.

"No, Maggie that's cheating!" 

Magnus batted his eyelashes, his beautiful eyes so wide that Alec couldn't look away. He groaned, giving in. 

"You aren't allowed to be that cute, it's just not fair." 

Magnus laughed and pressed kisses over every inch of skin he could reach. Over cheeks and forehead, jaw lines and finally that smiling mouth. Alec tasted happy and Magnus felt better than he had on a long time as Alec laughed between the many kisses pressed to his lips. 

He finally released Alec's face, only to wrap his arms around his neck and pull him in for a hug. He really did want Alec to stay with him forever. But he knew it was unreasonable to ask that of his boyfriend. 

Alec pulled him onto his lap so that Magnus could be held against his chest, his runed arms wrapping around the man in comfort. Magnus' voice was sullen. 

"I know you have to go back to work eventually but I wish you wouldn't. I don't think I can see you like that again, half dead and cold. Promise me you'll be careful?" 

Alec pressed a kiss to the warlock’s temple. "I promise. I'll do everything I can to come home to you, every time." 

Magnus sighed wistfully as the door swung open, revealing Jace standing there with a smile. 

"Hey, you two love birds; all ready to go home huh? To be honest I don't think you should go just yet." 

Alec groaned as Magnus stood from his lap. 

"Really? You too, Jace?" 

The blonde spread his hands in front of him in exasperation. "You had a knife sticking out of your chest, Alec! And I felt the whole thing, I think that gives me permission to be protective over you for the rest of our lives!" 

Alec laughed as Jace lent forward and zipped up his brother’s hoodie for him, despite the fact that he could do it himself. 

"You can't baby me, I'm older than you!" 

Jace shrugged, completely unconcerned. 

"Yeah but we're parabatai, that basically makes us twins." 

Alec let out another laugh as Magnus took his arm around his shoulders, slipping a careful arm around the Nephilim’s back to help him stand. 

"That's not how twins work." 

Jace watched as the warlock helped Alec get to his feet, hands outstretched and ready to help should it be needed. 

Alec had to admit that he was still feeling weak, knees wobbling a bit, and that he didn't mind the help this time. He'd been lying in bed, high on pain meds, for the past three days and he wasn't used to moving around again just yet. 

He'd made it a few steps when the door swung open once more, as Izzy swept into the room with pill bottles in hand, and a pack of extra dressings for his side. She stuffed them into Alec's bag, amongst the clothes and books already there to take to Magnus'. 

She addressed the warlock as she spoke. 

"Make sure his stitches stay dry and that you change the dressing regularly, it needs to stay clean and keep an eye out for any signs of infection. He has to take all his meds and please make sure he doesn't over exert himself. And I know it hurts but he needs to keep doing those breathing exercises I showed him." 

She finally turned to her brother and saw his sour expression. "Why are you frowning? Are you in pain? Maybe you should stay here." 

Alec wasn't having that conversation again. "Izzy! I'm fine and I'm going home! I don't need to be coddled." 

The doctor placed her hands on her hips and narrows her eyes at him, giving her angry look that always put the fear of god into anyone she pointed it at. 

"Do you know what it took to keep you alive? Do you know what it's like putting in a chest tube! I know you felt it all but do you know how hard it was fixing your collapsed lung in the field without any proper equipment!" 

Alec grunted in annoyance and took his arm from Magnus' shoulders to pull his brother and sister into a hug. As Magnus took his waist instead, to keep him standing. 

"By the angel, you two need to stop worrying. I'm going to be fine, I am fine. Thank you for saving me, now let me go home before you smother me to death." 

Jace grunted but hugged his brother back. 

"Poor choice of words there, buddy." 

Izzy squeezed her brother as gently as she could. "It was really scary, and you're my big brother, I don't want to lose you." 

Jace squeezed a little tighter, as if agreeing with the sentiment, and Alec softened his voice, placing kisses on both their heads.

“You aren’t going to lose me. I really feel okay, and you guys can come visit if you want. I’m only at Magnus’, it isn’t that far.”

Jace sighed and let go, Izzy pulling Alec down to kiss his cheek.

“Fine, just let us know if you need anything.”

Alec agreed and wrapped is arm back around Magnus’ shoulder, once more. The warlock snapped his fingers and waved his hand, opening a portal to take them home.

Jace and Izzy looked on with forlorn expressions as they watched their brother leave, Jace tossing his bag in after them.

Alec sighed, content, as they were released from the portal into the apartment he thought of as a second home. It was warm and bright, smelling like the flowers Magnus liked to bring back from Japan.

Magnus walked them to their room, eager to get Alec into bed for some rest, but the shadowhunter had other ideas.

“Do you want to dance?”

Magnus looked up, confused, only to see Alec’s genuinely hopeful expression.

“You should be in bed.”

Alec had a soft smile on, one so adorable that it almost made the warlock completely ignore the graze on that pale skin and the way the Nephilim could barely walk by himself.

“We haven’t gotten to go on any dates in a while, and I’ve missed our alone time. Please, you’ve been so worried about me and I just want to hold you.”

Magnus couldn’t resist that look, or Alec’s hand that was gracefully taking his to hold to his chest as he hummed, in lieu of music.

“You make me so weak, Alexander. I used to dine with princes and tyrants, and fight in the greatest wars.”

Alec smiled as Magnus adjusted his hold on his boyfriend so they were more in a dancers pose, swaying lightly.

“I believe you; you used to be scary and now you’re my soft kitten that likes to cuddle.”

Mangus clicked his fingers, enveloping the room in the soft light of candles as music began to play. He laughed at the Lightwoods words as Alec pressed their faces close together as they danced.

“You’re the one that blushes every time I call you a new pet name, Mr-I-hunt-demons.”

Another laugh, light and carefree. “Is that one of them? Because that’s terrible.”

Magnus smiled, enjoying their flirting after the past few days of nothing but worry. His nose brushed lightly against Alec’s as he brought his lips closer, the music rising around them.

“Of course not, Honey bear. But in all seriousness, I’m so glad you’re finally home. I hate sleeping without you.”

“Me too.”

Alec closed the distance between their mouths, closing his eyes as he kissed his warlock. It had been days since they’d shared a proper kiss, and he savoured the moment, hands still clasped together between them.

When they finally broke apart, Alec kept his eyes closed, feet stumbling a little. Magnus caught him, practically holding him up with an arm to the waist.

“Are you all right?”

Alec blinked and laughed a little, fatigue hitting him like a brick.

“You make me weak in the knees.” Magnus laughed at the joke but wrapped his arm around the shadowhunters waist to lead him to their room.

“I think it’s time we get you to bed.”

Alec couldn’t agree more, he was beyond exhausted and his ribs were aching more than he’d like to admit. But their bed was soft and inviting, sinking beneath him as Magnus slid him under the covers. The warlock crawled in after him, wrapping his arms around his love under the covers.

The two were finally home, together, and safe, and Magnus was so happy to have his Alexander back in his arms.

(You can read this and all the chapters as well as my other works on ao3 and ff.net in the links below!

http://archiveofourown.org/works/11294259/chapters/25526844

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12544803/6/Love-hope-and-misery