#ill die without him

[courtmartialme]

woag .. otp

[puppyeared]

meow

[casualavocados]

…It's nice. You're so noisy. […] Actually, it'd be better if we died together. That way, neither of us would have to suffer the pain of losing the other, right? Shut up.

KISEKI: DEAR TO ME Ep. 13

[bloodsbane]

the fact that kui had laios refer to chilchuck by only his first name more than once in the manga and then went oh btw only people who are very close to half-foots are allowed to call them by their first name. and it's simply never addressed

[balancethescales]

theres a special pain that hits me when i think about richie and carmy’s dynamic for too long because speaking as a middle child who couldn’t imagine a life without my siblings, it’s so real to shout the most horrendous shit you can think of to their face and expect to move past it with an off-handed apology and quick hug, if that at all, because you know as a sibling that the sibling bond is unbreakable; no matter what, you have been tied together since birth and nothing can sever that. the problem is richie doesn’t have the assurance of a blood relation— he only had mikey. and now, without him, his place, his purpose in the berzatto family, is suddenly no longer clear. in the freezer scene, carmy and richie were functioning exactly as family because that’s kind of who they’ve been to each other their whole life. so carmys half-assed apology makes sense, because to him, that’s how family, specifically his family, apologizes. but richie only had that relationship to the berzattos because of mikey, and they both know it, richie even more so after the s2 finale.

and so, much of the tension between them is because they don’t know how to function without mikey as their tether. mikey was a brother to both of them and now that he’s gone the two of them are clinging to each other to try and fill the gaping hole he left behind and make sense of themselves without him.

carmy and richie’s entire relationship is a desperate attempt to try and keep a dead man alive.

except. neither of them are mikey and they never will be because mikeys charisma, his personality, his spirit was one of a kind. and so, there’s a part of each of them that resents the other for not doing enough for mikey, but there’s an even greater part that’s struggling with not being enough for each other.

[heartless-curr]

something that i feel like goes suprisingly underacknowledged in the twewy fandom im regards to the final game between neku and joshua is that, in a sense, neku has to choose between himself, and between joshua. he had to choose between their worlds and existences — not just in regards to what happens to shibuya.

the loser *should* have been erased — the only reason neku wasn't was because joshua changed his mind. this wasn't just a battle about who gets the right to do what they want with shibuya, it was a battle for who gets the right to *exist*.

if i'm being honest? in that moment, i highly doubt that neku was thinking of shibuya — how could you, when you have a gun pointed at you by your friend who you had related to more than anyone else, you're thinking about the fact that you've been betrayed and you're in a life or death situation and fuck am i really supposed to kill him???? i can't do that. how am i supposed to do that. neku mourned joshua, neku grew from it, neku blamed himself for it (survivor's guilt × 2. new achievement unlocked!) only to now figure out that he was alive.

that's the beautiful thing about neku's character development, however. the neku of w1 would have killed joshua. hell, even the neku of w2 probably would have killed him — and joshua knows this.

the neku at the beginning of the game would have NEVER chosen joshua over himself, he would have never given up his world — his very existence — for someone else — much less someone who annoyed him as much as joshua did. and joshua actively tried to push him further into this sort of mindset during week 2 — encouraging his self actualization loop, because he didn't think that neku (or himself, really), was capable of change. joshua wasn't in shibuya during week 3 to see how beat changed neku.

joshua wouldn't have been able to guess that neku wouldn't have taken the shot.

that's the beauty of the writing and of the ending. the player and joshua expect neku to take the shot. we saw what he did to shiki week 1. but he can't. neku sakuraba went from "fuck the rest, you keep your values, and i'll keep mine, i don't need other people", to willingly letting someone kill him because he valued them too much to kill them.

yes, in the larger sceme of things it's about the fate of shibuya (which is a whole other topic when you consider how shibuya is essentially a reflection of joshua but i digress), but on a more personal level, it's about what neku values more in that moment. does he value his friendship with joshua more than he values his own life.

neku by all means should have chosen himself over joshua, but he didn't.

i think that's why it touched joshua so much.

[thatbuddie]

to the people who hate eddie diaz: how does it feel knowing that evan buckey despises you? like for real, he is disgusted by you. he would let a building burn to the ground with you inside it as he watches all geared up in his firefighter uniform <3 not only is eddie your favorite person's favorite person in the whole world but eddie's enemies are buck's enemies. so yeah get ready to die at buck's hands.

[merrysithmas]

me when someone says luke is a bad teacher and made grogu "choose" btw being a jedi and his dad:

what he did was ensure grogu could one day be a jedi AND have his dad now!!!

[embers-archive]

What are they fighting? Idk but they win obviously

[writer-room]

Honestly Rayla is equally 100% ride or die for Callum too.

That's so true I almost mentioned it in that post. They're so ridiculously feral for each other it's hilarious to watch. Callum's the legitimate "we ride AND die together" whereas Rayla is the "I will ride and die FOR you" sort of deal yknow?

Could be literally any situation, no matter how dangerous, and she's already decided she will die here. Does it ensure Callum lives? Then batter-up buckeroo we're going in swords blazing! Everyone cheer and clap for her human or she'll blow this whole place up. Kinda person who says "even if you hate me I'd still lose everything if it meant you were okay". She thinks they're in a tragic love story where she's always at risk of losing him but that's okay as long as it keeps him safe and happy like y'know Viren parallels, she'd risk losing her very self for him over and over. Except Callum would wait until the end of the world itself, and even beyond, and she wouldn't even have to ask.

The difference between them, really, is that Rayla will die for Callum on any given day. Callum will kill for Rayla on any given day. Something something matching sets

[skunkes]

if life is categorized by Before Loss and After Loss then I exist in the before but with a countdown to the after. and the countdown is always always present and debilitating. the loss will be debilitating too but i cant help myself. i will always suffer twice.

[clits-and-clips]

Is there like.... anywhere or anyone I can talk to about wanting to die without feeling bad or triggering people

[rainintheevening]

Caspian IX & Caspian X

There was a time / I used to look into my father's eyes / In a happy home / I was a king, I had a golden throne / Those days are gone ... I remember how it all changed / My father said / Don't you worry, don't you worry child / See Heaven's got a plan for you /Don't you worry / Don't you worry now

- 'Don't You Worry Child' cover by Kurt Schneider & Sam Tsui

For @an-angels-fury because this song has been making me feel things.

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

thinking so so hard about LaughingStock and how that'd go down. disastrously, probably

[kiddokori]

i dont ship them per say i just think they understand each other in a way no one else can and while this could bring them together it’s much more likely for them to reject the horror of being known and cannibalize each other like oscars

[polandspringz]

me doing my bimonthly check in to the servamp fandom only to see if mahiru has been put on the cover of a volume yet or not