#im actually not that broken up about it i came to terms with this a while ago lol

[buff-borf-bork]

.

[mclqren]

STARTING ANEW ★ CL16

PAIRING ✦ charles leclerc x fem!ex girlfriend!reader ; niall horan x fem!reader

SUMMARY ✦ when your relationship with charles ends up falling through, you find comfort in a certain singer's arms [ SMAU ]

WARNINGS ✦ cursing, some hate comments here and there but idk if that's actually a warning

REQUESTED ✦ here!

NOTES ✦ to preface: i usually don't write for anyone other than f1 drivers & football players, but i liked the idea of this so i decided to go ahead with it! for the plot of this, charlotte & charles broke up september 2022, and the dating timeline for charles & y/n is nov 2022-dec 2023. the logistics honestly make not a lot of sense but BARE WITH ME PLEASE. the fc i've used is hailee steinfeld, but feel free to picture whoever you want! my requests are open so feel free to leave a request :)

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liked by yourbsf, charlottesiine, and 194,310 others

tagged yourbsf

yourusername bigger and better things are coming in 2024 🪩

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user4 oh she is glowinggg!!

user5 y/n is living her best life and we love to see it!

yourbsf nyc was sooo much fun w you 😘

yourusername had the best timeee 💗💗

user6 SHE'S IN NEW YORK RN??

user7 OKAY SHE'S STRAIGHT FIREE 🔥🔥

charlottesiine you're sooo perfect! 🤍

yourusername all you cha!! 💗💗

user8 MOTHERS SPOTTED TOGETHER??

yourusername

( caption one: the only cha i need 😘 | caption two: night out 🌃 )

liked by charles_leclerc, charlottesiine, and 210,998 others

tagged charlottesiine

yourusername idk this weekend's been kinda fun!

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user13 THIS FRIENDSHIP IS SOMETHING IM ABSOLUTELY HERE FOR.

user14 charlotte x y/n WE LOVE TO SEE IT!!

user15 okay but the mysterious guy in the third pic??

user16 she's in another relationship??

user17 how has she already moved on that quickly tf... neither of them deserved charles.

user18 shut uppp!! you have no clue about y/n's personal life, for all we knew that literally COULD be charles, or it could be someone else! she should be able to do whatever she wants without some troll deciding they have a relevant opinion ❤️

charlottesiine the best weekend everrr!!

yourusername love you 💗

user19 CUTIESSS

user20 the way charles liked this ☹️☹️

user21 missing them hours

liked by yourusername, carlossainz55, and 1,081,007 others

charles_leclerc testing is all doneee - let's smash the race next week!

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user22 MY OH MYYYY

user23 he knows what he's doing w those pictures of himself

user24 no real im sweating over here.

user25 sooo...are you ever going to mention the breakup??

user26 or the new pics of y/n and her mystery man??

user27 to everyone asking charles to speak on his breakup: leave him alone! it's clear him and y/n are still on good terms as they're still liking each other's insta posts, but that doesn't necessarily mean they're together! they're people too, i think we all need to just leave them alone to process their breakup ❤️

user28 okay but y/n clearly is over him?? she's already processed the breakup, so why shouldn't he have?

user29 everyone needs to honestly just leave them be. this is sooo old rn and they're probably tired of it.

carlossainz55 all ready for the new season 🏎️🏎️

charles_leclerc 👊👊

liked by charles_leclerc, niallhoran, and 190,201 others

yourusername sitting still, looking pretty! 😘💗

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user30 OH SHE'S STRAIGHT FIREEE

user31 THE DRESS THE MAKEUP IT'S ALL SO PERFECT

user32 i needdd a grwm asap ur gorgeous girl!!

user33 okay but the second pic??

user34 we already knew she was over charles?

user33 yeahhh its just so strange to see her soft launching another guy

user35 idc what anyone says i LOVE that y/n has found another man she's happy with!!

user36 sooo real for this!! she deserves all the happiness in the world 💗

charlottesiine 😍😍

yourusername chaaa!! 💗

yourusername

( caption: heyy just came on here to say that me and charles are still broken up. i’ve seen a lot of rumours floating around the internet about the nature of our relationship, and while it is no one’s business except our own, i would like to just say that the break up, as previously stated, WAS mutual & we are still friends. mine and charlotte’s friendship also seems to be coming under a lot of fire recently, for whatever reason. she is an amazing woman and has been so supportive during this time of my life, so i kindly ask you stop bashing us on social media for simply being friends. thank you to all of the people sending me lovely messages - ur support isn’t going unnoticed 💗 )

liked by charles_leclerc, niallhoran, and 303,331 others

tagged niallhoran

yourusername the best thing life could've thrown at me 💗

comments for this post have been limited

niallhoran and who's that handsome fella 😘

yourusername just some annoying irish guy i met, idk how to get rid of him

yourbsf Y/N!! 😍

yourusername MY REAL LOVER 😘

charles_leclerc ❤️

yourusername 💗💗

charlottesiine me when i have to third wheel now ☹️

yourusername no neverrr ur my baby angel he can third wheel us 😍

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[strwbrryeyes]

𖦹°｡⋆ haikyuu boys as my breakup playlist

⟡ featuring: suna, oikawa, tsukishima, atsumu

⟡ cw: angst, idk still bad at these

⟡ an: i found my old breakup playlist from three years ago and took inspiration from that so these songs are old lol. writing this was silly because im in a loving relationship but it was like i felt all the pain of a breakup again </3

⟡ part two, part three

⟡ suna rintarou: you broke me first - tate mcrae

suna would be the one to break things off with you. when you first started dating he genuinely thought he loved you but as time went on and he became more distant, you started to feel like he was losing feelings for you so you asked him about it. in his words, "i think you were just the first girl to give me attention after my last relationship" and "im not ready for a relationship". a week later, he starts talking about all the girls that have come to him after the breakup and started talking about his hookups to you. this bothered you and hurt you deeply so you decided to cut things off with him completely and he was not a fan of this. so he tried everything to try to get you to talk to him again saying that he misses you and that he wants to get back together. you couldn't care less though, he's already broken your heart too many times for you not to notice his pattern of wanting your attention just to make you jealous or upset. in the end, it actually did end up hurting him and made him realize what he lost. he knew he fucked up but there's no going back anymore.

⟡ oikawa tooru: over breakfast - ellise

it's been a few months since oikawa left for argentina. it's been hard for the both of to be apart for so long and in completely different timezones. you could feel the connection fading but neither of you wanted to admit it because you both loved each other so much. but the longer you guys try to keep the relationship afloat, the more frequent you end up arguing over text or facetime. but you both decided that it could be something to figure out when oikawa visits for the holidays. well, the holidays come around and you finally have time to see each other and talk in person. from the moment oikawa entered your apartment, you both knew it was over. you could tell so many things have changed over the course of the last few months but instead of facing it, you just decide to spend one more night together just to have one final time to say that you tried. it was bittersweet and it hurt a lot but you didn't want the night to end. maybe you could fix this over night? in the morning everything will be better and you can set aside your differences! unfortunately, that morning, nothing had changed and you and oikawa finally came to terms with the fact that maybe you two just maybe weren't meant to be.

⟡ tsukishima kei: high definition - waterparks

when tsukishima was still part of the sendai frogs, he traveled a lot. it's not like he was off in another country like some of his old teammates and rivals, no, you lived with him. even though you two had been dating for quite some time by this point, tsukishima still had trouble expressing his love for you. he tended to push you away whenever he was stressed even though the one thing he wanted the most was your comfort and loving. he was just worried he would end up snapping at you and making you hate him. he didn't know that you'd end up upset with him regardless. you loved him so much but you don't know how long you could going on like this. i mean come on! tsukishima was always away for volleyball matches and even when he's home...it's like he's still not even there. tsukishima knew that you were starting to slip away from him so one day he sat you down and explained how he was feeling and it was finally then that you understood why he acted the way he did. you tried protesting his decision to break up with you but he kept insisting it was for the better. by the next week tsukishima had moved out leaving you alone in the once shared apartment, wishing and hoping he'd come back one day.

⟡ miya atsumu: better off - ariana grande

everyone knew that atsumu could be hot headed most of the time when it came to volleyball but what they didn't know is that it would sometimes affect your relationship with him. much like tsukishima, he would close himself off from you whenever he was mad at the world or whatever else there is that could make him upset. it was starting to get tiring for you. you felt like you had to walk on egg shells around him just so he wouldn't snap at you (wether he meant to or not- his mind would always fog up). towards the end of your relationship, you could feel yourself start to get numb in regards to your feelings towards atsumu. atsumu couldn't really tell at this point that you were losing hope for the relationship. if anything he thought everything was normal but that was only because half of the time he was too much into his own thoughts to notice any flaws between the two of you. it wasn't until he came home one day after an away game on the other side of japan and found that all of your stuff was gone along with you, that he realized nothing is what it used to be. he found a note from you that explained that you weren't happy in the relationship anymore and that you felt trapped. you also stated that you hope he figures out his issues and that you'll always be there for him if he needs but that right now you just needed space. atsumu spent that night crying and angry at himself for letting your relationship get to this point.

[datesinredink]

could you possibly write headcanons you have of how the rise yanderes would like psychologically manipulate/punish their darling? i’m all for physical violence but what do they do to mess their darling up in the head?

ty very much for reading this if you do :)

THANK YOU SO MUCH RAGHHHHHH!!!!! Since this is such a fun question to answer im gonna order these from most to least awful. The ranking is just my opinion and i would LOVE to see what other people think jhwhnwiurfj i decided to chug a soda to write this and i think that was a great decision because i immediately came up with smth for donnie because of it.

I decided to search up some ACTUAL psychological torture methods that have been/are used in real life and let normal manipulation take more of a backseat so that this didn’t end up too repetitive- honestly would recommend researching it, it’s a fun topic.

Trigger warnings: Very unfun use of technology in your arm, Drugging, More drugging, Even more drugging, Withholding of food/water (+ a more mild example of doing so but it still happens), Mild descriptions of gore, Mentions of blood, general yandere stuff like kidnapping, and likely others- please ask me to tag anything else triggering, because unfortunately I am not perfect.

1- Donnie.

This might be surprising to some of you. Yes, Leo is the manipulator- he’s the face man, the people guy, but I think that in terms of sheer awfulness- Donnie is going to win here simply because of the potential with his tech.

He’s a genius with access to mystic powers who has incredible skill with both designing and creating various machines and gadgets. I think that he’d be very creative, just considering how much he thought to fit into just his bō staff.

My first thought was that he could come up with a small device (which might be able to double as a tracker) to embed under your skin that could move around. It would skitter up and down your arm like a beetle (likely your dominant arm, just to be worse) and be a nice cherry on top of anything else he could come up with.

To pair with that, he could force some type of hallucinogenic drug down your throat- after some googling, LSD would be a likely candidate. While apparently it usually only causes “pseudo-hallucinations” (where you know that they aren’t real, whereas true hallucinations would be where you think they are), true hallucinations can happen, and the pseudo-hallucinations combined with the environment alone would be enough to cause a panic attack. Not even to mention the kind of drugs that the mystic city might have. (edit: i just found out about datura??? GODDAMN THAT’S A STRONG DRUG.)

Also, I think that Donnie would actually take decent care of you prior to any sort of escape attempt or broken rule. He’d hate for you to waste away in a dark room for the rest of your now shared life, so he would take you outside to some private space for a set amount of time everyday while you’re chained to him and probably gagged so you don’t call for help- you need time in the sun and exercise, after all. That’s why I think he’d also stop doing that if you broke a rule. You don’t want to be anywhere near him, and he supposes that he’s fine with that- but if you really don’t want anything to do with Donnie anymore, then you’ll just have to deal with losing all the luxuries that came with him being so caring.

He’ll lower the temperature in your room and take the hoodie that he so graciously gave you and waltz on out. He still brings you food and water, but now it’s less frequent and more random since now he’s prioritizing his brilliant inventions. Sorry dear, but weren’t you the one who begged him to leave you alone? Now he is. What’s the problem?

2- Leo.

Even if you haven’t done anything wrong (yet), being kept in his room would probably be a nightmare. I feel in my adhd soul that he would NOT be good at keeping it clean. It’d be living in a constant mess, and as someone who has lived in a perpetually messy house, it will definitely take a toll on your mental health. Not to mention the additional noise from whatever he and his brothers are doing. You wouldn’t be allowed outside of it either, not for a while at least, so you’d never know what day or time it is.

Other than the already constant sensory of his room, I think that Leo would mainly use threats- of which he goes through with. Not against you, though, but against your family, (what’s left of) your friends, and any other loved ones you might have. He’ll drag their unconscious body into whatever room he’s keeping you in, and wait with you for them to wake up.

While you two are waiting, he’ll lay out everything he’s planning to do to them in awful detail- and lucky you, he even left out some things as a nice surprise!

You’ll be tied to a chair and forced to watch as their guts fall to the ground from the clean slice in their now empty abdomen while Leo picks up and talks about their functions one by one. You silently wish that you never told him that you admired his skills as the team medic.

When he’s finally done rambling about the various viscera laying on the cold floor, he’ll force you to help him clean up- “so that Raph doesn’t get mad about the mess”, as he says. He’ll hold you in his arms when the two of you are done, whispering in your ear about how sorry he is that he had to do that, but you really did force his hand, and you know that, right? If only you had listened…

When the list of people you can bring yourself to care about finally has 0 names, Leo starts to instead take things away from you. He starts small, gradually taking and taking like the parasite you’ve learned he is until all you have left are the clothes you wear and him. He’ll even deprive you of food and water for periods of time, and you can no longer tell if you wish he would shut up for once or if you’re grateful for at least anything to distract you from the constant pain in your empty stomach.

Mikey and Raph landed themselves towards the bottom because I think that they’re both more lenient with punishments (Raph would be afraid of hurting you beyond repair physically OR mentally and Mikey has generally been shown to be very patient and forgiving with people he cares about), but I also think that they might be more exhausting to be stuck with GENERALLY, wearing you down slowly in day-to-day life rather than harsh punishments for breaking whatever rules might be in place for you.

3- Raph.

Raph would try to instill learned helplessness into his darling, to make them understand why he always has to be so careful!

It’ll happen the next morning after a particularly bad argument between you two, and when he’s suddenly letting you handle sharp objects again- but oh no! For some reason you feel so sluggish and dizzy today that you messed up and sliced open your arm. It’s ok- Raph’s here for you! He’ll either patch up your arm himself or take you to Leo, and after it’s taken care of he’ll scold you and say that it’s fine, maybe he’ll give you another chance next week. And he keeps his word- once again, you’re allowed to try your hand at chopping some veggies with him or Mikey- and again, you feel dizzy and accidentally cut yourself.

This will happen many more times- or not, if you give in easily enough- at least until Raph finally decides that he just can’t keep doing this. He brought you to the lair to keep you away from harm, and despite it being to teach you a lesson, he just can’t bear to watch blood drip down your pretty skin.

So instead, he further seals you away- locking you in his room and wrapping one of his hoodies around your head. He’ll keep you like this until you finally learn.

He won’t starve you, at least. He’d hate to watch you waste away after everything, so you’ll be fine physically, but it’ll be hell to not be able to see or properly hear anything. It’ll also be more difficult to breathe properly through the fabric, so I wish you luck with that.

He’s infuriatingly nice throughout the whole thing. Of course he’s angry when you argue with him- when you hurl insults and and completely unfounded whining (yeah right) at him. Sometimes he hurriedly leaves the room so he doesn’t do anything he regrets- but when he comes back- despite your wishes that he wouldn’t- he just wraps that damned hoodie around your skull and chides you for your hostility, leaving you to wonder if this could really be better than death.

You feel insane rambling to his plushies, of which you now know the individual names of, but it’s an admittedly nice bit of company to have when your only other option is Raph. Honestly, you’d rather deal with Ms Cuddles by this point, and she even managed to wring a scream out of Donnie.

At least it’s something you can actually have even an ounce of fun doing that he won’t take away for being “too dangerous”. As long as you can tolerate his absolutely smitten behavior when he finds you talking to them.

Be careful about how loudly you complain, though- it might just land you being completely swaddled in blankets and left to go insane on his bed.

4-  Mikey.

I think that if you were to try and escape from Mikey, he’d conclude that his love simply needs to spend more time with him! Maybe if he shows them how wonderful life is with him, they’ll stop trying to run away!

Unfortunately, I doubt his sleep schedule is very consistent. He keeps you up late at night to try out new spraypaints, recipes, games, anything he can find to do with you will be done. You hardly get the chance to sleep well, and the peace you get in dreams is frequently interrupted.

When he does take a break, he insists on sleeping in the same bed, and it’s much harder to fall asleep with him staring holes into you, as though he were trying to memorize every single detail.

It takes a damn long time to get Mikey to knock it off, too. You have to guess that stubbornness runs in the family, if his brothers are anything to go by. Unfortunately, said brothers’ coddling of their youngest has resulted in quite the persistent guy, and you’re quickly losing the energy to refute him. You wonder how long you’ll need to sleep for the giant spider in the corner of your vision to go away.

When the box turtle finally does realize how much of a toll his shenanigans have taken on poor you, he decides that as the person responsible for you, it’s his job to make sure that you get plenty of rest- and if you refuse, Dr Delicate Touch and Dr Feelings are always here to make sure you’re convinced!

He does a sort of 180- where he once forced you to do everything, he now forces you to do nothing at all, even when your mind screams at you to get up and move. He’ll slip something he stole from the pharmacy into your food and carry your sleeping figure back to his room for your seemingly infinite nap.

In between consciousness, you’ve learned to just stay in bed, maybe draw or write something related to all the adventures you go on in dreamworld.

Fun fact, over sleeping has a couple negative side effects- it increases the risk of diabetes, obesity, headaches, back pain, depression (like you don’t have that already, being kidnapped and all), and heart disease! I wish you the best of luck.

When he finally believes your rest to be sufficient, everything will go back to normal. Except, of course, the lingering paranoia of when it’ll happen all over again will continue to haunt you.

Who knows, maybe he’ll continue drugging you just to keep you a little more complacent. Can’t have you running away all the time, right?

[aliaology]

BECAUSE I LIKED A BOY

summary: you used to date quinn, the relationship starting not long after him and his other ex broke up. she got mad, made drama about you, and in the end, it flared up by the time your relationship was long gone.

pairings: quinn hughes x fem!reader

warnings: death threats

thin mints. god you loved thin mints, and currently you craved them. actually, you craved the nice memories they brought. the memories where your ex told you he would have some guy get some for you. he ended up being that guy.

quinn hughes. your favorite past lover who will continue to outshine the rest. he treated you well, made you happy. he was perfect.

bonding over the black eyed peas and the smiths was something you found to be hard when it came to other people. but with quinn, it was easy. he made love seem easy and effortless.

but the downside, was his ex. she was pretty, but they had broken up about three months prior to you and him hooking up and then ultimately getting together. no one necessarily knew of their breakup. they didn’t post pictures often of each other due to quinn living in vancouver and his ex living in michigan.

so everyone assumed they were fine, until quinn decided to hard launch your relationship. you were fine with it at first. it was innocent, like the cuddling on trampolines you guys loved to do.

but now you were being called a slut. at this very moment, you were being called a slut and getting death threats. at the time, you were getting the same treatment.

it seemed his ex put the idea that he cheated on her with you, into everyones head. and they believed it. they believed it because of the stereotype against hockey players. the stereotype against girl best friends.

but that didn’t stop your relationship. you were so into it. you were there for everything, even his brothers… until you weren’t. it wasn’t like you both ended on bad terms. in fact, you both ended things, stating it was better to stay friends.

then she released a song. a song where she practically tore you apart, tore you down. you were the hot topic on her tongue.

she painted you out to be the bad guy. the manipulator. the one who made him take you to bed. you were just trying to hold him close and love him.

the only win from the whole situation was the fact he called you his favorite love. that you would always be the favorite.

but to everyone, you were the slut. you didn’t have a choice in that matter. you were the homewrecker. all because you liked a boy.

ynusername

liked by jackhughes, _quinnhughes and 625,737 others.

ynusername all because i liked a boy. coming out oct 14 (with permission). thinking of dating a boy with an ex? i wouldnt recommend it. especially if stuff happens after you had already broken up!

comments.

user and shes gonna eat 😜

user she alr did with ‘skin’ 🤭🤭

user DIE WHORE

_quinnhughes insanely proud of u y/n/n

ynusername thank u quinner 😪

jackhughes AND ALL OF THIS FOR WHAT⁉️⁉️⁉️

lhughes_06 WHEN EVERYTHING WENT DOWN WE’D ALREADY BROKEN UP 😱😱😱

user all hughes brothers being her no.1 supporters is so cute

jackhughes can i get you thin mints this time

jackhughes im exless!

jackhughes no im not but my ex forgot i exist!

jackhughes choose me instead!

_quinnhughes jack please this is embarrassing for u

jackhughes SHUT UP QUINN

user i cant tell if quinn is okay with this or not

ynusername he is 😭 me and him are best friends now and have no hard feelings or any romantic feelings towards one another anymore. plus jack will never have a chance 🤷‍♀️

user ITS GONNA BE A BOP LMFAO

user slut! homewrecker! cunt!

user banned!

user i love i live i laugh

user i alr know this will slap

trevorzegras @/jackhughes shes mine

user STOP.

user puckbunny ass bitch

user i know what im streaming when it comes out!

user i still prefer quinns ex over y/n

user then use her name instead of y/ns xx 😻

erm..! this lowkey sucks LMFAO

taglist (perm!) @hockeyboysarehot (just ask to be added for perm tags! <3)

[l0verf0rever]

can we get a like angst/ fluff with jude where they are broken up but both still love eachother and just thought it would be better for them tk break up. then they like both see eachother in Mykonos and have a one night stand but neither want it to be a one night stand and have like a little heart tk heart when they see eachother out the next day. 🫶🏻

𝙄 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙞𝙩 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙬𝙚 𝙢𝙖𝙠𝙚 𝙪𝙥 | 𝙅𝙪𝙙𝙚 𝘽𝙚𝙡𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙝𝙖𝙢

{ Social Media Au! | Jude Bellingham x Reader }

Angst, Smut, Fluff

Masterlist

Current

3 Months Ago you’re Boyfriend Broke up with you

Stalking each other story and it usually goes to nowhere scared to talk to each other but both still asking how each is doing through friends

Friend arguing about how the girl He’s linked with looks like you haven’t really found anyone wishing at least to be on speaking terms

they advice you to get out there so You can find Someone they brougnt you to Greece to party and get drunk and have ‘great sex’

Greece , Mykonos.

User1: Bro jude fumbled this girl?

Replied User2: Real 🤡 moments

User3: hope they get back together i can feel it

Replied User4: me when im delulu

User1: isn’t He’s ex at mykonos too?

Replied User2: manifest~~~

User2: i miss Y/n and Him

Replied User3: Real

User4:He looks so good

User5: Not him getting too used to pretty women when Y/n Is literally won awards and well respected athlete 😔 gotta keep these guys in check

Replied User6:if she can get broken up with we can too😭😭😔😔🥲

you miss him in a way you two spent time together curled out together in You’re own two worlds during vacations

Remembering the things he said still hurts in a way nowadays stalking each others stories and leading to nowhere hoping he’ll talk to you

Crying you’re self to sleep trying to keep yourself together seeing pictures of him everything felt so confusing questioning yourself why’d you even bother going here just to see him again? Relive the heart ache? Feeling like the foolish one

[Tomorrow came and the morning left it was night you never ever felt ready ]

You felt like no one knew you look at him with Another girl chugging another drink while she has him the bitter taste down you’re throat

you’re friend whispered “hey isn’t he judes teammate? I think you should talk to him he’s been looking at you from the start” you walk to him almost tripping

“are you okay?” He catches you on time he’s charming smile He’s hand on you’re hip enjoying each others company

you smile “ you’re performance was really good its like not tennis at this point” complimenting each others skills “you watch my Matches?” You asked “yeah actually my little sister looks up to you “ he smiled looking at you’re eyes sparkles “i forgot my name was Alexander just call me alex”

Judes eyes could pierce through the skin he felt a sense of jealousy looking across the room cause he miss you missed each others kiss those girls cant give what you had with him cant remake the feelings you both had and sure ass hell Alex can’t

You were at the bar alone alex left and felt someones hand holding you’re wrist dragging you to He’s room “Jude stop what are you doing?” He still doesn’t budge “jude stop “

Leading you in Hes room hes face near yours “you have a girls leave me alone ” He locks the door

“we aren’t even a thing please do this so we can call it even” You do still miss him “fine” He started to making out with you Missed this holding hes hands holding your body He’s hands removing you’re dress leaving you just in you’re bra and panties he ruins you’re make up and making Hickeys on each other and till both of you reach you’re highs

“I love you know that right?” Hes eyes on you as the sun rises “i know i miss you” He carried you bridal style to clean you Fell asleep

woke up to an empty bedroom feeling disappointed that you let him get you easily it hurts to have something everything felt sad without him you see He’s text

“ Meet me at the boat “ Hes devilishy handsome looks as you walked to him felt nervous “i want you i don’t want to be a another night stand i don’t want anyone else just you” its everything you ever wanted happened

User1: WAR IS OVERRR

User2: 🫶🫶🫶

You’re hands on he’s hair both of you blush being at each others arms again for forever and always.

THE END.

I Kinda struggled writing this and i don’t think this is my best but and i really like this concept actually and i listen to multiple songs for inspiration and hopefully you guys like it thank you for reading.🫶

[imustbenuts]

im free from yakuza kiwami 2. fuck the writing in this one. this was a complete mess of pulling from the most popular generic east asian drama tropes at the time of 2006 and having it be handled by a super inexperienced writer at the helm.

i went from having no expectations, got somewhat surprised, only to end up downing alcohol and laughing hysterically before the credits rolled. so that should set the mood for how i feel about this one. thought vomit under the cut, a lot of info dump about culture incoming

yakuza kiwami 2 is pure heterosexual east asian romance bullshit.

im gonna just. describe as best as i can what i know and remember from the general media coming out from the 90s to the 2010s in around this part of the world before i just start explaining why i think this story is a mess.

so. 2 parts i swear is responsible for this rubbish.

1) East Asian Beauty Standard

the general consensus for a beautiful feminine woman AT THE TIME in this sphere is the following

be willowy thin (fat = lazy and ugly)

have black hair that ISNT short (dyed = too much individuality, too much WESTERN INDIVIDUALISM, gasp how dare!)

fair skinned (bc dark = she works in the fields and is from a lower class)

young. if you heard of the term "Christmas Cake" in japan context, yeah. (ie women over age of 25 are undesirable)

be educated and refined, bc that indicates class and femininity (failing this means shes vulgar and gasp like a barbarian)

be submissive to her male peers in the sense that her authority cannot override his at least in public (for the sake of his face)

dresses feminine and not like a man (trousers and jeans are man-ish. traditional clothing, skirts and dresses are preferred. the further back the stronger this sentiment is.)

incidentally, theres a lot of classism tied to this EABS due to sinocentric culture influences. it has to do with the chinese court system and how korea and japan copied it and a lot of the culture wholesale but. anyway. thats like over 1000 years of history in there thats not really worth detouring to rn.

and also, the worth of a man is sometimes (not always) upheld by how classy and feminine this wife of his is. as of 2024 though, this line of thought is still around in the more conservative pockets. also, the education might not matter as much these days as how deep her and her parents' pockets and wealth are.

moving on.

2) media tropes

so. off the top of my head.

if you wanted a popular romance drama in this time period, the popular offerings no matter where you looked tended to offer the same flavors of tropes.

the woman always has dark hair, is fair skinned, thin and younger than her male love interest. ive never seen this broken or subverted in my time absorbing via osmosis the dramas playing on local tv growing up in the early 2000s.

everything else about her can be subverted though. sometimes she can wear fancy pants or have short hair to indicate her strong individualism. BUT, her personality no matter how strong it begins, no matter how her intro begins will 99% of the time encounter an effect where catching feelings turns her into a meek loyal woman to her love interest.

bc she cant override his authority in this culture context.

at worst, she becomes highly irrational and even hysterical in the dramas when bad things happen. this includes things like love triangle, or a fallout of family business, drama, plot or whatever. she would cry and sometimes even die.

see: sawamura yumi. sayama kaoru.

meanwhile, the male love interest can be anything. ive seen middle aged guys to young good looking upcoming actors playing the lead, with looks varying from haggardly okay to young and handsome. it. really depends on the genre.

depending on what specific country it came from, the drama would have the male either grow, become manlier (by learning honor ig), become stupid in the name of love, but he rarely if ever actually dies. the woman effectively becomes yoshi for mario to lauch off on when they're crossing a chasm

the romance is forced. a lot of the BIG LOVE SPARK ie kissing happens in tense moments bc it builds drama, but in reality comes too fucking close to sexual assault (some of the old jackie chan movies does this iirc for slapstick even)

see: sayama getting kissed right after handling her biological father's ashes less than 24 hours ago and admitting to kiryu that shes scared. this scene right fucking here.

bc in general, the scriptwriters for popular dramas tended to be guys themselves and tended to write more human dudes. and the women in the stories are reflective of the ideal societal expectation at the time: being a Refined Housewife.

so her character development is often headed in the direction of marriage and being a stay at home mom.

if it sounds a little like tradwife bullshit, it is.

Refined Housewife

(i have massive negative thoughts about this which i KNOW for a fact is a thing bc a lot of these societal culture femininity was impressed on me as a kid in a world where it was already getting increasingly impossible to have 1 spouse be a SAHP. and also i hated the whole thing about giving face to the patriarch of the house when i personally saw so much ego dick measuring from my uncles. anyway understand that this is both a bias an a lived experience, so proceed with that in mind)

there is a problem with the Refined Housewife expectation: education.

in general, education has been a good metric to judge how classy or smart one is in asia's largely on-the-surface meritocracy based culture. people will look at each other's school first and then judge them from there, and pretty hard too.

so everyone regardless of gender will be expected to study super hard. and bc having good test scores and going to good schools looks good for the family's face, parents will often pile on tuition to the child to get them a leg up in life.

bc also no good degree from good school means no future.

but then... the woman is expected to be a housewife. 🙃 meaning... the education, her accomplishments, are kinda... tossed away in this context. put a pin in this.

it wont matter how much she studied or accomplished, bc the expectation is that the woman would marry and obey her husband, and give him face/honor that way. the kids will come eventually bc having kids = being filial to ones parents in this context.

also uh. no, having adopted kids is not thought of as being filial. continuing the bloodline is.

and if you've been paying attention, then yes, ive been skirting around the backbone of sayama kaoru's writing foundations this entire time.

Her story has been butchered so clumsily i cant even...

lets just. ugh.

she fits the EABS standard, her tropes are trying to subvert the expectations of a womanly woman in this context, she has IMPRESSIVE education and career achievements. she works in a male dominated field, and is keenly aware of sexism. she is strong, stronger than her male peers, at least we are told.

by 2006s standards, its still considered a fresh take with those alone in japan. sexism there is its own flavor of crap. (if you noticed ive not spoken about LGBTQ+ stuff at all, its bc how ridiculously BINARY the expectation is at that point in time. it still is today but less so)

however, the writing has this sense of trying to copy the popular tropes at the time while not fully understanding and dissecting them, and ends up butchering sayama's character before the romance even properly began.

i mean, for fucks sake even, sayama and kiryu has a whopping 14 year age gap. when im told these are supposed to be believable people living in japan, this is too big for me to just go 'oh ok!'. and remember the Christmas Cake thing? shes 25. (FUCKING--!!!! !!)

the problem here that i see is the writer trying to apply all of those while trying to play the tropes straight. trying to imitate. trying to make a statement but then finding out theres nothing within yourself to stand by what you want to say and backtracking.

we are told:

sayama is strong yet she goes down with 1 slap by random thugs and needing kiryu to come in and body them. because romance ig.

we are told shes a yakuza hunter but she doesnt scare a single one beyond her introductory scene.

she goes from defiant and bossing kiryu around to getting her actions overridden by kiryu and ryuji, both men, towards the end

her subtext is that shes not feminine and therefore conventionally undesirable, but then kiryu tells her shes actually feminine and therefore desired, as if its all that matters.

she becomes so stricken by grief and freaked out that she runs off solo to deal with ryuji in the most out of left pocket planning ive ever fucking seen.

and then yells as she takes out her police baton to take down the big yakuza dude, drawing attention and turning herself into a hostage.

i know the writing will fumble but i didnt expect it to fumble this bad.

for all the good the surface chemistry kiryu and sayama has, its being undermined by a fundamental failure to understand tropes and then using said tropes as a crutch so much that everything here has become a bloody mess.

this failure of over-relying on tropes without understanding them extends to yumi too. sawamura yumi was young and beautiful, and became the Refined Housewife to the Not-Male-MC and ends up regretting it, and gets killed for it.

her defining trait is that she is beautiful in subtext. thats. thats what the tattoo is. in a world where the tattoo makeths the person, thats what she is and all that she is.

dear lord.

ive read up a bit more on sayama and you know what. good that she chooses her career over kiryu. the romance would have caused both of their characters to explode with the trajectory this was heading in. ffs sayama could have had her own game. she has so MUCH potential.

and also GOOD that the writer is forced to think of kiryu in the position of the Stay At Home Parent for haruka and the orphanage down the line!!! subverting the fucking traditional BS expectation! yes!!!!!

all i got was sayama and kiryu making out before the bomb went off in front of my alcohol and salad while they're like 'eh, haruka will forgive us for dying :')'

and i ran out of alcohol.

sexism? maybe. incompetence? definitely.

hhgrhgrhrghrghrgrhgr wow this got long. ugh. guhhhhhh.

[desb3ar]

Thoughts of Miguel O’Hara via ATSV Script

First off. Wow.

TLDR: I love Miguel STILL. Just not how he was originally protrayed in the script.

Within the script, there was a crazy amount of implications of him being some feral beast, words like “animal” and “prey” were used to further push that sort or characteristic onto him. I’ve looked around on X and saw how many people had a distaste for that and I am on the same boat. However, I’ll give where credits due and applaud the artists and Oscar Issacs himself for executing him way better than the script did. (Maybe the script was written in a way as some sort of gag. I mean hello, code name was WAM (WACK A MOLE). id poke jabs too.)

From what could be seen on the screen, what I see, was a broken man with tons of dedication towards his cause, keeping up with status quo by any means necessary. The tense exchange Miguel had with Miles in the Train sequence, I began to think Miguel saw himself in Miles, degrading and telling himself to not make the same mistake like before. Maybe I’m looking in it too deeply, but yk. However, if you only read the script, you’d think I’d be crazy. He was made out to be someone who is cold, inhumane, and absolutely unhinged. Something I’d never think about towards him after watching the movie. (Apart from him actually going on all fours occasionally. bro was desperate…)

It’s a little bananas how he was written, but my love for him as seen in the MOVIE did not waver at all because… why would it? I loved the movie and everything that came from it, I’m not gonna let a script just wipe away everything I like about him LOL.

I just hope they gave him some mercy in the BTSV script. (i severely doubt it 😭)

lil bonus: this is a part i love. fatherly instinct . aughh. i can appreciate that.

edit: TO BE FAIR… he is 50% spider so i guess i can understand where some people are coming from in terms if yk “what did you expect.” since his dna was spliced. HE IS INDEED DIFFERENT.

then a race thing was mentioned because what are the odds of him being POC and him acting so outta line in contrast to his comic.

i dont know the true… thing is for him??? so im atta loss

edit 2: according to the artbook, it is told he has a lot of layers. so why look on the surface, that is the script, and fail to look deeper. he has an animalistic FIGHTING STYLE, not animalistic in general (seeing someone as PREY however…)

[a-whispering-echo]

i saw band requests and you mentioned Red in ur last post so yk 👉👈

only if you wanna

YESSS! Red! here!

So, hes a drug dealer here -oop. hes 25 and about 5'9. he sees like a right dick, a real THREAt, but hes a sweetheart, really.

He dated Dust when he was 18, and Dust was 15. wanna make it clear that Red DID NOT know of Dust's age! Dust looked older than he was at the time due to malnutrition and living on the streets at the time, and Dust LIED about his age to Red! When Red learnt that Dust was younger than he said, he broke it off with him instantly. They have a somewhat brotherly relationship now; Red looks out for Dust and calls him 'Kid' now.

Red still deals to Dust - just weed though! Sometimes Dust pays with money, sometimes sexual favours. His partners all know about both the drug use and the payment methods. Theyre okay with it!

Well, mostly.

Cross fucking HATES Red! Cross was besties with Dust when he started dating Red, and Cross could see that Red was a bad influence on Dust. getting him into all sorts of dark and dodgy shit; hes the reason Dust smokes to this very day, in fact! And yeah, maybe some of that hatred was caused by younger Cross' 'little' crush on Dust from back in the day... Regardless, Cross decked him in the face once.

Cross doesnt know how the relationship ended because he was shipped off to boot camp by his father while Dust was still dating him, and then when Cross got out, he joined the Stars. Cross never contacted his old friends when he was shipped off, wasnt given the CHANCE to, and then by the time he came back, all his old friends had formed a band without him and had made it big. He assumed they simply were not interested in him anymore. And hey, if he dated Dream, so sweet and kind to him, if he squinted he could almost trick himself into believing he was Nightmare.

Dust thought Cross left BECAUSE of him dating Red. He knew Cross didnt approve, knew he didnt like Red, and literally after just a few weeks after a physical altercation between the two, Cross disappeared off the face of the earth? Obviously, it was his fault, and Dust realised that he himself was USING Red; for shelter for food, heck, for drugs! And that wasnt fair to Red. So, he came clean; told Red what he did, what hes doing, and his lie, and obviously, they broke up. They are on... amicable terms now, obviously.

On an entirely separate note, i actually am SO proud of how this drawing came out! If im being honest, ive always been slightly scared of drawing, not only black characters, but characters who are of another race to my own, because i dont want to fuck it up, and accidentally make some racist caricature, which, like, i know is just my anxiety, but its stopped me from drawing characters before. So, im honestly so pleased with how he came out! I think he, and all the other characters ive drawn, have actually come out very well, and im pleased with the results! And i think thats finally broken down my caution with straying from drawing them <3

[seaweedbrain3]

i had to get on my laptop for this because i didnt know if i was gonna get a little upset and start angry typing cus angry typing is uncomftorable on my phone BUT ANYWAY ENOUGH WAFFLING

i dont like how unreasonably joshua is, i dont care if you dont like him for like no good reason cus i hate characters for no reason but THE REASONS PEOPLE HATE HIM ARE NOT ACTUALLY GOOD!! i think im very upset about this because when i read over the transcripts with him i relate to him on some level, like his alpha male thing is just him using metaphors to help explain his points which is how i see it, and people think its weird or him being some alpha man, which he isnt, he was explaining how he doesnt want to be replaced just in a way that makes him seem like some alpha male, and it alos angers me how in that session he wasnt being taken very seriously, is his way of explaining things weird?? yea it kinda is but thats not excuse to not take him seriously or dislike him, he had a valid reason to be upset, and yea his solutions were not good at all, but tbh if i were him i would also want juniper out of the cabin, and by the end he understood that his solutions weren't good and he just came to terms that juniper will just be there for one more day, he also showed genuine concern for what it being taught to the kids, he wants them to learn life lessons and be responsible, not little shit stains who run around with no remorse for anyone, which isnt bad at all, he wants the kids to be good people when they grow up, does it cause him to be a little up tight?? yea, but theres always that one person everywhere, wether it be school or camp or again everywhere, persnally if i was there i would understand him completly, hes also like me in the sense that he cannot express his feelings well, so he tends to make up excuses to avoid actually stating his feelings, yea sure its annoying but its not something to hate someone for, also that whole mediation session is just joshua explaining how hes upset that his routine was broken and how it got taken over and he was replaced, which i would be upset over too, and what is this a trait of?? both adhd and autism, which goes into my point that joshua is neurodivergent, is that one of the only traits i found?? yea, and why is he still neurodivergent?? because hes literally me, (please do not take my word for it, i just see a few neurodivergent traits in a character that fit me and i make them neurodivergent) i also think sydney's hateful attidute towards joshua made some people feel the same which goes into my previous argument that i said in a past post about how syd is an unreliable narrator, and also, his reasons like the life lessons thing and stuff they may hjave been excuses but they're still reasons, and his main thing was being jeaslous but HE STILL HAD SOME GOOD POINTS

please take this post with a grain of salt, im very bad at explaining things and i dont know if i explained everything the way i wanted to, i might reedit it at a further date when i actually find the words to explain everything correctly and i might be wrong about some things so again TAKE IT WITH A GRAIN OF SALT

(also i swear tumblr hates me cus i've been posting shit for a while and after many hours they still have 0 notes)

[nahalism]

I hope it is not too much question to ask but I read your post and was wandering what on the queer spectrum are you and also when and how did you come out?

idm answering but i find it hard to cause?? i dont really know — i used to go by nonbinary & pansexual to make it easier for other people to understand me but part of me felt limited by the labels and like i was lying when using them cause the label would point to the thing i was describing but not to what i actually meant, meaning people would tie me to their perception of the words i used rather than the essence of what i was feeling.

— re gender: i still feel the same in the sense that i dont primarily feel 'male or female', i just feel human. i relate to my masc & femme qualities and how i can interchange between the two, but its something that comes natural to me and till other people made me aware of it, i was quite unconscious of the fact that was different. in terms of attraction, i been attracted to masc women and androgynous/gender queer people my whole life. that said, as long as im attracted to a person, their gender doesnt matter to me.

— re coming out: people (esp my mum) been thought i was a lesbian since i was a kid. i used to kiss my bestfriend in secret & have crushes i didnt know were crushes. but i didnt realise what that was or meant till i was 14/15(?). i was suppressing real hard ngl but anyway, i started dating girls. fast forward, one day i was having a heart to heart w my mum. (when i moved out my mental health got scary & during that period i was also going through a break up which had me down baaad, and i remember being fucked up cause i already felt like shit, but felt worse cause i had no one to express that heartbreak to. — my hood friends still didnt know i was into girls, & i didnt wanna seem pussy for being so heart broken to the people that did know 🥴. idk so moist lol but anywayy). when i finally came clean to my mum about the how bad my mental health had been, she said sum like just promise you'll be honest with me from now on so i can be there for you. so i was like .... 'since were being honest with eachother, im bi. ta daa'. and we dont talk about alla that stuff in my family so it was awkward but she already suspected & knew what it was so that was that :)

[spearxwind]

been thinking a lot about my different oc worlds recently. ive said before ive got four, but technically it's five if you count extinction.

im gonna put all my thoughts under a readmore bc once again this got insanely long jkllkjjkf. i be rambling

most of my attention has definitely been going into challenger deep the past year (and will likely continue), recently i refurbished hollowridge as well and have had a lot of fun with it (even if i havent drawn much to show for it...)

the other two of the set of four i originally posted about are my agony drive and broken horizon settings. Broken horizon is more of a personal headworld where ive set my dragon ocs, but I have not really been successful with it in terms of like. worldbuilding and crafting a story for it, mostly because there are very few characters in it currently and i struggle with it. But it's the world where cercerion and my sona dima (as an oc) exist. i would love to actually do a better job with it sometime but it currently isnt a huge priority because ive been focused on the other two main ones (but again since its just a personal headworld it literally is just some place i like to mentally hang out and fly around in, im not super bothered by it being undeveloped.)

However we have the two troublemaker worlds now

the agony drive setting has been driving me more than a little nuts because of its whole situation with it. i absolutely adore the characters i have in it, but i have no idea what to do with the world itself. it used to be a joint project so i was extremely limited in the way i could develop it bc i depended on the other individual enjoying the ideas and i did my best to keep it afloat almost being the sole contributor to it, so now that its liberated i just didnt know what to do with it. i do like a bunch of the lore bits i came up with but some part of me is like 'idk if i enjoy this as a world' bc it still feels limited in some way? Another issue is that while hollowridge (previously my horror and slapstick gore setting with demons/angels/magic vibes) was dead in the water, i channeled that violence slapstick demon/magic vibe through TAD, but getting a focus back on hollowridge has kinda just. straight up deleted a bunch of TAD's reason to exist? i dont know if that makes sense

HR isnt really that much slapstick violence because death is final, and TAD is more cartoony in that sense bc death ISNT final which is its main reason to exist (unlimited violent major character death for the funnies), but theres a weird overlap that is keeping me from focusing correctly because it makes my brain go 'you are doing the same thing twice'

I would really really love to actually turn it into something fun and unique (separate from my other worlds) but i really havent been sure how to go about it because of that overlap. i genuinely think its just a problem of 'you have to actually develop the setting to have fun in it' and i just havent been able to do that yet bc i cant decide what i want it to BE. TAD has also never really had a lot of story to begin with so it makes things harder bc the story is the vehicle to explore the world with. its pretty frustrating bc midas set and david are some of my fav ocs ive made and i miss them but god dammit if it isnt hard to actually work with the whole thing....

and last but not least... the fifth one. extinction. a lot of you probably know this one from my comic. if youve been here since like... 2014-2015 (which would be insane) you might remember me beginning to develop that story until it eventually became the comic that is currently sitting unfinished and feels like a huge weight on my shoulders just out of sheer shame

the issue with extinction is that it was a lot of characters that i deeply loved (and still i still deeply love!!) all with fun plotlines, backstories, and a lot of fun tidbits to em that i ended up bending and breaking dozens of times just for the purpose of fitting them into a relatively short story that i could draw out and finish. and more importantly into something i hoped would be handleable instead of spiralling out of control like it had happened before

but what i didnt realize is that by doing so, i "locked" their lore in place into these very small boxes that would fit into a story, and thus i would remove what i had loved about those characters and their interactions that i had come up with years and years ago and a lot of my very very cool ideas for them simply went out the window in favor of .... well i dont. know. but off it went

i live in complete shame for not being able to finish the comic. it genuinely is a huge and extremely heavy weight on my shoulders and this whole thing has prevented me from even thinking of said ocs for years now even though they are some of my oldest and most beloved. saying all of this is not something i take lightly in the least as well

so recently I have been thinking about bringing them back as well... maybe (to the extent that i can... i have a lot of ocs and you guys know i have a lot of bias when drawing faves. so i cant guarantee content but at least i would be able to think about them again).

essentially the same way that i rewrote and got back my old concepts for hollowridge that slapped hard i want to get back my original ideas for extinction that i thought were really cool and just wasnt able to fit into a comic narrative

obviously this would come with a lot of retconning and i know a lot of people will probably not like it if i do it and i think thats something i have to face and learn to live with

but yeah anyways. TLDR is i really want to actually do something proper for TAD but have been having a lot of trouble with it unfortunately, but im working on it. and ive also been feeling rly nostalgic about extinction so you might see the characters again, albeit different in terms of story from what you probably know

[quietbluejay]

Fulgrim 5

Craftworld time the description is actually pretty decent I'm just burning out on McNeill Prose (tm)

FINALLY I GET DECENT ELDAR CLOTHING DESCRIPTION!!!! so yeah Eldrad's been getting visions of something just as bad as the Fall coming okay so they got the path system set up as per this book

also we have a time measure

"centuries" which doesn't sound like a huge indicator but when dealing with 40ks timespan it actually is then again why am i looking for consistency in the timeline in this of all novels why do i bother also, eldrad is like the only adult in this entire novel im praying he stays that way

he sees the doom of humanity and is basically Big Pensive Emoji

it's also funny in a way that the bits of 40k with the most hope in them have been from the Eldar POV (I'm thinking about Valedor and yeah I know this is doomed here but, it's still here!) he gets a vision of Horus though he's not able to recognize him finally he's able to get the word "Warmaster"

well, the diasporex didn't go out without a fight only 1 ship in the entire dual fleet didn't take any damage

huh i'm surprised they actually left the humans alive, just sent them off to be slave labour and yes it actually used the term

har har har if you're not familiar it's almost a direct quotation from Paradise Lost

Julius is thinking about philosophy again, after training

also im like i'm pretty sure McNeill's got a decent education in the classics (HELLO IRENAEUS MENTION) also this whole thing with Blayke, the way it's talked about but I guess that doesn't actually mean you can write OH SAUL POV MCNEILL DO NOT BLOW THIS

take a shot every time the word "perfect" is used in this novel i was about to say Get Thee To A Thesaurus then I remembered what McNeill is like when he gets thesaurus access… we get a little bit of a summary of what went down on Murder with the EC for those who didn't read the earlier book or just forgot what happened lol

tfw you are a dance kid hanging out with the basketball team

but also...to steal a quote from a friend of mine, maybe you wouldn't be so exhausted if you had actual strategy

no literally it is exactly the reason why they got exhausted iirc saul was like the only one who came up with decent tactics unfortunately his commander is eidolon

like textually! it's why the luna wolves yelled at eidolon for all his faults Abnett is probably the best of these writers with respect to verisimiltude in military tactics

first off, the nose ISNT BONE ITS CARTILAGE more and more i am beginning to think that mcneill doesn't know a single thing about the human body unless…are astartes supposed to have the cartilage in their noses replaced with bone??? also it's really easy to fix a broken nose on a normal person just unpleasant (re-break and set properly) also what lesson in humility like dude that's not what he learned from it....

when fulgrim does it, it's genuis when eidolon does it, it's stupid also lmao eidolon tells the story and saul is o_0 because he's twisting the facts so much lucius: hmph loken didn't beat me saul:…you were flat on your back lucius: it doesn't count!

lucius, my dude

Solomon comes over because he saw Saul's face when Eidolon was telling the story

he really wants the tea here solomon: you know, i know, the serfs know that eidolon's a blowhard lucius: gasp also lucius don't you hate eidolon, shouldn't this be like a "secretly delighted gasp"

you guys are having this conversation and confrontation in front of literally everyone they're doing this at the dinner table sadly lucius was infected with the childishness virus solomon already was so that's nothing new you know what, i'd want to punch Solomon too, Lucius manages to resist and then goes off to hang out with Eidolon, who is uhhhh canonically his rival

learn what also man, Saul, that's your friend, I know he's kind of a dick but still okay we will not be doing war crimes today, they found a beautiful planet with no intelligent life solomon thinks sadly about how the imperium is going to destroy this beautiful world and convert it to industry and this is just as obnoxious as the DO YOU GET IT THEYRE FASCISTS so I will spare you

back to Ostian and everrything is small c chaos with the remembrancers getting ready to do Becky's opera he hasn't seen Serena in weeks either

if you haven't read any of it, how do you know it's bad?

begone coomer

ostian remembers how he got jumpscared by fulgrim recently

silver and copper? tsk you'd think someone like fulgrim would know not to mix metals also red and purple shot silk with silver is also a Choice anyways fulgrim can carve but he can't bring it to life like ostian so he wants ostian's help

fulgrim eventually gets him to try and be honest

ostian: the perfect is the enemy of the good fulgrim: and i took that personally

y-yearning? ok ostian figures out that fulgrim didn't actually want constructive criticism, he wanted validation we've all met that guy, I think heck, I've been "that guy". sometimes after asking for concrit I've realized that what I actually just wanted was validation and gone off and sulked a bit lol but Fulgrim here is....

gifted kid syndrome i know the feeling but how old are you again?? anyways i do find that the bits that dig into art and the artists are some of the most emotionally true parts of this novel if a bit er over the top in a way that sometimes obscures it oh lucius wants to talk to Ostian Ostian: I know who you are Lucius: :D

lucius just wants ostian to show him to serena so she can paint him lol

so i guess fulgrim is like me fr except that, you know, i decided even if it was visible it wasn't enough of a disaster for me to need to redo it, and I was happy with it anyways, and I'd be more careful with how much floss I cut next time i do think a lot of it can be traced back to the gifted kid syndrome but it doesn't explain everything? because fulgrim's been into art for what two hundred odd years

Fabius has become the less cool version of Doc Ock um guys perhaps you should have sorted this out before eidolon was lying naked on your operating table?? eidolon doesn't want alien stuff in his throat fabius: well too late now lmaooo

why does he even need to be naked for this if it's a throat operation....

update: already drugged and restrained on the operating table eidolon, you should really have gotten this sorted out beforehand this scene is like genuinely uncomfortable

okay phew! we're back to solomon on the alien planet and fulgrim is crying from how beautiful the ruins are "this is the most beautiful scene i've even seen!!" julius, also sobbing nods along solomon: is he on drugs solomon: are they all on drugs fulgrim: we must leave it! untouched! to despoil it would be a crime!~ solomon: uhhh what about our job fulgrim: ARE YOU QUESTIONING ME this whole thing is stupid solomon is like "how are they all going along with basically disobeying the emperor"

hey what if i did funny abridged versions of the horus heresy novels that might be fun

anyways all the other planets in the system are like this solomon is the only one who feels like sth is wrong well also saul solomon talks to vespasian after eidolon won't return his calls they're both worried about the legion

vespasian: lol sure why would he do that solomon: why don't you ask him about that huh???

vespasian is gonna ask fulgrim im sure that'll go well oh serena pov she's deeply stressing about her portraits of fulgrim and lucius ugggggghhhhhhh she's moved from using blood to other bodily fluids as well

serena: IT WORKS FOR A BIT BUT THEN IT STOPS serena: wait serena: i have an idea

time to seduce a poet serena: let's talk about you leopold: :( i get enough criticism of my poetry serena: :) actually :) i love it :) serena: let's go back to my studio and read some

it's pretty smelly apparently (gee i wonder why...) besides being an enormous mess

OKAY WHAT i'm never going to joke about the books being sexless again tldr they have sex she kills him in the middle I thought she was just going to kill him straight away

Eldrad Ulthran save me save me Eldrad Ulthran (he's back) oh right yeah re: fighting against aliens that prey on humans, they do in fact deal with proto-Drukhari Solomon remembers fighting them alongside Luna Wolves (context is How Do We Meet The Elves)

hey we already had this argument in Horus Rising

?????????? okay????? like what is it the sword???

this is fulgrim? the guy who earlier in the book refused to allow the laer to become a protectorate because they were aliens and needed to be destroyed? this is the same guy? was fulgrim briefly possessed by like an opposing spirit?

wait huh i didn't know they had wraithlords this early, i thought they were newish live and learn (they're having the meeting on one of the empty planets) eldrad can't read fulgrim's fate other than to know he's a player

huh that's interesting re the primarchs you'd think they'd have more of a presence in the warp oh is that why Emps had trouble finding them eldrad how exactly did you see these guys acting better….

the wraithlord is basically like "let these idiots kill each other this is not our problem" eldrad: i know but also i saw this will be a problem for us in the future. if we don't do anything now wraithlord: ugh fine fulgrim got all dressed up and his makeup done for this meeting solomon judges him internally

master of diplomacy, fulgrim

okay so he acts deliberately provocative i genuinely don't know if we're meant to think that fulgrim's idea of diplomacy is insulting the opposite party and otherwise antagonizing them in order to get a casus belli with them getting so offended they withdraw from talks first or if it's just bad writing

[artcommunityvent]

heres my rant for today: (sorry in advance for long post)

i hate how modern art communities have to “fandom-ify” every single new trendy thing literally DAYS (and sometimes even hours) after it drops. i know this is a lot of the same sentiment as those people that just go “popular thing bad” but honestly it really puts me off some medias because i dont want to associate with anyone else who likes it

do we really need a million different fan ocs and aus for EVERYTHING? and like, i know its nothing new, obviously we have the onceler and undertale aus to look back on, but its exhausting at this point because while those communities were presumably genuine, in the present day it just feels like the fandom equivalent to an industry plant. and most people dont even stick with the thing they decide to make their entire personality!!

remember when spiderverse came out and everyone made spidersonas? who can you name thats actually drawn their spidersona more than once? it feels like everyone just trend hops, and yes i know thats how the internet is but its just exhausting especially when it brings down otherwise creative and inspired works

fnaf security breach: everyone makes fnaf aus and glamrock animatronics, then spiderverse as previously mentioned, then welcome home dropped and thats becoming a shitshow with how yall are fandomizing what is essentially a small creator telling their ocs lore in a creative way, and now its happening with digital circus. im so tired of seeing projects that are cool and visually appealing becoming a cesspit of bland, unoriginal aus and piles of fanart only to get dropped when the new shiny comes out

and i wanna elaborate on welcome home for a second because i know damn well if one of these people who makes “daddy dom priest wally is actually the devil” aus had an oc they loved, and someone came along and made their own aus of it in the same way, that person would bitch and cry oc theft. some people dont even change up the characters design, like how entitled do you have to be to essentially just steal someones oc and call it your own? it disgusts me how people are treating clown and honestly i wish they would put the series on indefinite hiatus or complete their story privately to teach these people a lesson

another thing that puts me off is how every piece of media has to have the “fandom daddy” for lack of a better term. glamrock freddy, hobie brown, wally darling, or jax, its all the same thing repackaged; someones gotta be the tumblr sexyman. its so tiring—ESPECIALLY as a lesbian who doesnt really wanna center men in my life at all—to wanna see fanart of the media you like and its only: “heres the one character everyones horny for drawn in a totally different and more sexualized body type” with everyone in the comments salivating over them. i really like digital circus! but all i see are people who would walk across a mile of broken glass just to suck a fart out of jax’ ass. what about the other interesting characters? why does EVERY conversation with popular media have to be about “which guy is the most fuckable” (guy specifically because come on, when has a female character been the highlight of attention; using the previous example have you seen ONE person talking about digital circus that even remembers zooble exists)

it feels like nobody can appreciate work anymore without having to claim some form of ownership over it, to say “hey this thing is so popular and important that it is now a part of my identity!! look at my millions of ocs that i will draw one time and never again!” im just tired of people being unable to passively interact with media they enjoy and everyone seeming to fight over and prove some connection to the things they like

tldr: im tired of everyone in the art community making heaps of fanart, aus, and fan ocs for stuff the second it gets popular and then totally forgetting about it the next time something else gets popular

(and before yall bring up hyperfixations: i am autistic; i understand having so much love for a piece of media for a short while and then dropping it for no reason and its heart shattering; BUT AT THE SAME TIME this pattern is on oxford to me and its on such a large scale that it infects the greater art community as a whole)

That is indeed the nature of media consumer at its finest. I do feel like it is more appearent now due to the way most social media algorithm works. They only show what is trending at the moment, so naturally, we are exposed only to this specific thing until another trend eventually takes over.

Even artists who never create fan content can be influenced to do so by looking at the other artists, be it to dive in along the hype for the popularity of it, for the geniune fun, for the sense of community, and many more reasons.

- ☁️

[yeahmiknight]

My system is so weird because....its got a really weird way of operating and people say im faking DID because of it which...im not I dont think??? Eh I guess ill go into more detail proceeds to dump life story Gonna make something clear: Im not an Endo(?), I did not choose to be a system. My system came from trauma and even if we have stuff like fictives and all that, this is a real thing. Im not being a system for any type of gain, people dont understand how painful it is to be this way sometimes. It hurts sometimes. For the longest time I denied being a system because of some online drama stuff. Mainly because I thought people would just assume it was an excuse when I started acting completely different and I always just assumed I was broken in some form of weird way, which I ended up calling BPD which was HALF RIGHT?? Before I truly came to terms with the fact I was a system, I had 2 beings who I now understand are alters who would talk to me- well only one of them would really talk to me the other would talk AT me in a sense or just force front. One of them I now know is a/the persecutor. For about a few years of my life up until very recently my persecutor had been one pulling most of the strings because I had no idea this guy was co-fronting or just fronting in general and assumed that it was just me being a terrible person, so I always made sure to say it was my fault when anything happened, I never fought, I never really defended myself, I just took everything. My persecutor would always start stuff and then back off when the aftermath came up so I would have to try to figure out what was going on while I had people yelling at me for saying things I didnt even know or doing things I wasnt aware of. It wasnt until one of my good friends came to me while I was questioning something about systems and let me talk to a guy who actually was a system and it turned out I checked almost every single box for being a system. Of course I continued to deny it like an idiot and even tried to repress my own thoughts out of fear that I truly was in an effort to try and get it to go away???? as if that would work??? hello what was I thinking. Eventually I started coming to terms with the fact I was a system and thats when more alters started popping up. Now for about the part of my system experience that people try to get at me for. Me and my alters can communicate really well, I can talk to them, they talk to me (for the most part) they talk to eachother and its lalalalalala. I barely have any memory fog and when I do the intensity seems to be weirdly fluid? Sometimes ill remember most stuff but other times my memory will just be blanker than a white sheet of paper. Ive tried to develop a way for my alters to be able to front when they need/want too and let other people know through emojis as my alters sometimes wanna pop around discord, this doesnt work all the time of course as sometimes we just forget or they dont want to change the emojis but its how we do it. After figuring out I was a system we all kinda...collectively banned together to not let the persecutor front? Hes a really bad guy im talking....really....really bad guy, we know we cant just hold him down forever but we try I guess. My fictives are an odd. Considering the fact they are almost all objects because thats the main type of media I consume? They all formed under very weird circumstances for some reason. Four of them just started developing randomly, one was spawned because of the stress of RETAIL apparently? And one spawned because of a lady at Walmart tryna square up because I scanned her item twice and she was tryna beat the life outa me r something. They dont act exactly like their sources and I mean thats fine they can do what they want. The weird thing I guess is the one that spawned because of the lady thing didnt even do anything when they arrived, the minute they kinda showed up they immediately backed off. I dunno where this post went I just wish there was a place I could talk freely about these guys and their antics.

[comradeboyhalo]

Do u think with the new no enchants agreement the totem is also out? Or maybe blue will go for more totems since they seem to get fairly regularish pillager spawns? Also how do u feel about this agreement cause on one hand if every creator on a meta level agrees and actually sticks to it I can see it but on the other hand I feel like blue keeps nerfing themselves and extending olive branches (only for them to be snapped in half) and this is just another thing… like blue had the obvious advantage with forever spending all day making another xp farm and him and bbh working on armor sets for the team plus blue has mending while red still doesn’t (I think?)… like yea I see their point about it but like blue had a massive advantage in terms of infrastructure that they just gave up? But if it makes all the CCs have more fun then all good I suppose? IM CONFLICTED AAAA

i think with the new bounty system (so more pvp) its ultimately the way its gotta go, and i think the server will be better off. because if they keep enchanted pickaxes, then itll be far less aggravating to make more diamond armor. and maybe we'll see some cooler plays from ccs now!

as for totems: i dont think theyll be banned if golden apples stay. chugging gaps is honestly a better play than stacking up on totems, just because you have to quickswap to the totem and they take up inventory space. imo totems are only really broken when theyre paired with autofill.

it does suck that blue gets nerfed for what they do best (being sweaty nerds) but i also think that they still got good use out of the xp farm and everyone came to this agreement for good reason! it does (hopefully) benefit everyone.