#im crying no bawling inside

[shadowchargertomyyoong]

with the pjo show's season 1 over and everyone having mostly positive reviews... im scared, really fucking scared.

ok lemme be clear, im not against the show, but with its success, the heroes of olympus series will also be most probably adapted, and i don't want it to be!!

ik it a stupid selfish notion, but you don't realise how sacred the HOO series is to me, and i don't want anyone to touch it.

there might be a possibility that the adaptation improves upon it but i so fucking love the imperfectly perfect book series it already is that i don't want it to change.

it's great that the stories are finding a new medium and reaching a newer audience but, what if, with the changes, it doesn't feel the same, HOO is such an integral part of my teen years that idk if i can bear seeing it change.

And if the adaptation is worse....oh god the horror!?!?THE AGONYYY!!!

i won't get through it okay.

ik it's irrational but it's how i feel. ffs leave it be, PLEASE.

(it might break my heart)

((and and also also, if i do end up liking the show better, it feels like betraying the books that formed my childhood))

[dykeyeonjun]

.

[dirt-str1der]

Whatever kiryu does to you might not always be the best or even safest option but he will always do it with a lot of love in his eyes so you have to forgive him

[snowsinterlude]

the ballad of money, power, and glory.

(coriolanus snow x reader x lucy gray baird)

summary: being lucy gray's best friend, you were always updated on her life, not knowing how she truly felt for you. and now, with coriolanus snow being your new friend, it was odd seeing them fighting so much over your attention, with you not knowing that both of them were obsessively in love with you.

based on this ask

c.w: lucy gray baird, coriolanus snow, implied aromantic reader, yandere behavior from both of them (nothing too serious), unrequited love, drama, jealousy, love triangle, obsessive love. contains some movie/book accurate mentions but nothing very important, violent content, lucy is mentioned to have been your first kiss, commedy in the end.

chapter one: money.

"god, you gotta see her, snow." lucy beamed, her smile going from ear to ear as she talked about you. "she's so cute! i think she's the love of my life, truly." she said

snow frowned at her words. in the capitol, it wasn't seen in good lights to have someone talking so passionately about other person of the same gender. he rolled his eyes internally, his arms were on the back of his back as he walked behind her. supposedly, you were going to be waiting for them at the train station.

he walked, and walked, and walked. all of those minutes were awfully torturing his soul as he watched lucy gray talk more and more about you- as if she hadn't done it during the entire hunger games already. like on the zoo, when he thought she would be crying from fear of dying when, in reality, she was crying from fear of not seeing you for a last time.

he remembered it perfectly, better than he remembered the biology classes he had. lucy bawling her eyes out silently, still sobbing as she looked at him and explained how much she owed you- how much she loved you. it was like she couldn't think of anything other than you.

"she is always so pretty, so sickeningly beautiful. i can't stand the thought of losing her, snow. i wanna be with her." she said, her eyes red and puffed while her nose was as red as a tomato.

"have you told her about it?" he asked, face leaned on his fist as he observed the singer cry.

"no, snow." she answered, sniffing. "i've made a mistake," she chuckled, wanting to slap herself.

"what did you do?"

'i only noticed i love her now."

remebering that, snow started thinking that you should be the most beautiful girl of district 12- or that maybe you didn't had a single flaw on your skin por something like that. maybe you were one of those who hypnotized people at your surroundings to make them percieve you like the most desired thing they wished for.

but then he saw you from afar, waiting for lucy gray while your eyes roamed through the crowd. he didn't asked for you, no, never. he never asked you to blink like a doll, to look at him with those shining eyes and god, whatever it was that snapped inside you made him obsessed with the thought of having you as his main prize.

his thoughts were interrupted by the sight of lucy gray baird hugging you tightly, kissing your face multiple times as you laughed, hands on her waist as you kissed her face too. he cleared his throat, awkwardly.

"ah, snow. that's my best friend, my soulmate, y/n" she said, and you chuckled before shaking his hand.

"pleasured to meet you, yn. im-"

"coriolanus snow, i know." you said, kissing the back of his hand in a theatrical manner. "hello."

"you know?"

"yeah, my dear lucy told me all about you. and, let's be sincere, you were on the tv during the interviews on the hunger games." you said, smiling while shaking his hand "i'm happy you helped her!" you said

the spark that shone in his heart was fueled furiously by your words. 'your desde lucy'? what's that, a movie?

that was the first time he felt jealousy.

chapter two: power.

lucy gray baird was your best friend since kindergarden. what could you say? sandbox love never dies.

well, her love for you seemed to have grown sharp as a way to protect you and herself from the ones that could hurt you. that's why she glanced at snow menancingly as he forced his place between you both at the bar. when you were dancing with some older group of old ladies, she finally spoke up.

"what are you doing?" she asked, not looking into his eyes, and she didn't needed to for him to know she was angry.

"what do you mean?" he asked, faking innocence.

"don't act innocent, coriolanus." she growled, frowning "she's mine."

"i don't recall asking for that information." he said, smiling at the sight of your happy face dancing with other elders.

"you will not take her away from me." she said, getting up and walking to you only to playfully grab your waist and your hand, dancing with you while coriolanus watched.

you were so dazzling beautiful in his eyes, he just had to have you. it wasn't his fault that lucy gray thought and felt the same way about you.

with that in mind, lucy gray baird punch on his face was unexpected.

"what the fuck, baird?!"

"i told you to leave her alone! you are a fucking peacekeeper, coriolanus! when will you stop that?!"

"'that' what???" he asked, voice loud enough for him to frown at it.

"don't feign dumb, you disgraceful blond. you know she has sensible hearing and you bring her in to fucking SHOT at trees?" she screamed. the singer had the most defiant frown on her face, making it clear just how much she was willing to go for you.

his expression seemed to calm down, his stare on her became confused. "i... i didn't know- she didn't tell me-"

"oh of course you don't know. do you even bother asking?!" she asked, her eyes boring holes into him. "get away from her, snow."

and she left him behind just like that.

of course he wouldn’t know how sensitive you were when it comes to your hearing. he would never get to know you the way she did. but behind that façade, she hated herself for introducing him to you.

at this moment, she hated snow as much as he hated her.

chapter three: glory.

that wasn't on your plans.

you were aware of your friendship with lucy being a bit too... sweet. you didn't care about it. she was still your best friend and you were still the girl who saved her from that ginger girl.

when you met coriolanus snow, you could already see history repeating itself. lucy was jealous and coriolanus was obsessive. this match would end up being your death, probably.

you didn't really liked them the way they wished you did. you were aware of how much coriolanus liked you, from the moment you kissed the back of your hand till now.

and yet, you were still not into the singer nor the victor, you were fine on your own and decided that a long time ago. you wouldn't be a good girlfriend, couldn't even take care of yourself, how would you take care of someone else?

for that motive, and others, that i won't be able to speak about, you never liked anyone. and people started thinking it was lucy gray's fault, with her cunt m constant bragging about being your first kiss. and she was, but you not liking anyone wasn't her fault, you truly just couldn't seem to find someone who was just right to you.

with that being said, you were the one angry at them right now. what the hell that has happened between them, envolved you, and you weren't having it.

"i don't love any of you," you said, for their own shock.

chapter four: the ballad of the unloved ones.

sitting still on front of you, lucy gray baird felt like she was punched on her heart, losing air from her lungs quickly than actually needed. coriolanus, right by her side, felt the urge to throw up as he recieved the unhappy news of how you didn't loved them.

it was the truth, though. but you still held them on each of your arms and let them take in the affirmation of how you felt about them.

"but-" lucy begun, shaking a bit from the anxiety on her chest.

"-no, lu. i'm sorry," you said, "i don't really feel like loving anyone. i never loved anyone, not in this way though." you cooed, giving her the comfort of your kisses on her forehead.

"but maybe, if we j-just-" coriolanus stopped in his tracks when you shook your head negatively, your fingers drawing patterns on his scalp, and he almost meowed at it.

"sorry, dear. i only love you both as friends." you said.

and they understood you after a long talking, a bunch of silent tears and sobs from their delusions.

by the end of the day, they were at the bar, both looking pathetically red from the way they cried after it.

"sorry for punching you on the nose," lucy said, and she looked like a ghost, finger tracing patterns on a cup. "i don't wanna lose her," she goes.

"sorry for shooting the mocking jays on that evening," he said, sipping on his cup. he was refering to the evening where she punch him.

"you did what."

"uh. i shot the mocking jays."

"coruolanus 'm gonna shoot you in the ass." she growled.

they were back to being friends, and made sure to protect you. just because you didn't reciprocated none of their feelings it didn't mean they would start bitchin' about it (even though they did for like, two weeks.)

so, them both heard festus with his friends talking about you- it wasn't nothing good. and which better way to end him than punching him?

yeah, they were still your best friends. you still loved them dearly with each part of your being.

but just as friends.

[tan1shere]

Slumber Party

Ellie williams x fem reader!

A/n: Hello my lovelies, first post on here (more active on wattpad) but thought I'd occasionally post here when I'm bored. If you have any requests at all they're definitely open! Also this is kinda short but I don't plan on making the next part as short. Enjoyyyy ☆°•

My masterlist

Summary: like the song slumber party. Ellie thinks she can treat you better then your shitty girlfriend

Warnings: smut, (not in this chapter) read at your own risk (mdni) Dom but soft, protective, ellie! Reader is quite innocent, is very soft also. Cunnilingus (duh- also not in this chapter) your girlfriend in this is an asshole. Abuse, somewhat angst, crying. Lmk if there was anything else!

Pt 2 here! ~ pt 3 here!

Ellie hated Isabel, your girlfriend. She treated you horribly, and Ellie really hated when you'd bawl your eyes out over the phone to her whenever Isabel would storm out of your shared apartment. She hated the fact anyone would make you cry. She never liked seeing you unhappy. Isabel shared this hatred. She never liked you hanging around Ellie, even if you have known Ellie almost all your life. She would scold you after everytime you and her would hang out. You'd come back to the apartment smiling. "What're you smiling about?" You just smile more happy to tell. "Ellie she makes the funniest jo-" "I don't like you being round her Y/n." You would always stare blankly at her, struggling to find the words, leaving your mouth open while you ponder.

Today was not off to a great start. Ellie had just been over, you two were having such a great time. "I should probably get going squirt." She would flash her smile at you, ruffling your hair slightly, as she stood to go to the door. Ellie was a bit older then you, and come to think of it so was Isabel. Let's just say you had a thing for older ladies. (Only by like 6 years) You also stand up, seeing her out and saying goodbye. But as you open the door you're met woth those dark brown eyes. Isabel had just arrived back from work. She glares at the auburn haired girl, making her way inside. "Well hi to you too." Ellie scoffs then looks at you. "Text you when im home." You give her a small nod and a smile before she leaves to her car. You turn around to be faced with a stern Isabel. "You know how I feel about her being in our home. Especially when I'm not here." You never really talk back to Isabel you always apologize and go into the kitchen to make food. She was truly a bitch and she started showing her true colors the moment you two moved in together. You never understood what you would do so wrong. You made every dinner. Every lil food she'd want. The laundry. Just to please her. And although it'd work, it'd never last. "I'm sorry Iz.. She just really wanted to show me this art she was working on and in person. Nothing more I swear." She let's out a scoff. "Why should I believe you it's almost every day you spend with her. It's sickening and pathetic." You stare at her as she says that. She would always make you feel stupid. When in fact you were quite smart you knew what most things meant. Maybe not so much bedroom stuff. But you were book smart nonetheless. Speaking of bedroom. You were basically a virgin. You've kissed Isabel many times done a lil something here and there but it was definitely not much. So you were certainly not confident on that subject. Although Ellie would tell you all sorts of stories about the girls she's been with. It fascinated you to learn all these new terms and what everything was. "I promise to talk to you before hand next time-" She instantly cuts you off. "Why are you still standing here. Cook, I've been working all day." She spits going to your guys shared bedroom. You sigh doing so. And that was your life.

It was maybe a couple weeks after, you had felt like you were coming down with something so you decided that bed rest was the best thing. It was now 3 in the afternoon. You were sleeping in your bed when the door busted open. "What the fuck are you still doing in bed it's almost 4!" Isabel was home and not happy. You sit up a bit. "Yes I know I'm sorry bu-" She drops her bags. "This place is a mess, there's dishes out. Foods not even ready. Laundry is still in the hamper. What fucking else." You look at her softening your look. "Iz, I'm sorry- I woke up feeling horrid so I decided to stay in bed." She shakes her head. "Even when I have the worst headache known to man I still get my ass up and work. You know all that sweet money, I work for that. And you work here that is your job." This was one of the moments were you'd feel bad for yourself. Weak. Weaker right now considering you're sick. You look down at the sheets. "Are you even listening to me? You spoiled brat." She doesn't do what she does next often but when she does you know you're in the shit. She hits you. Hard. "Wonder why I have a headache all the time. It's you and your whiney voice. Look at how pathetic you are." She glares down at your drowsy figure. You feel tears finally sting as you had held them in. Refusing to let yourself be so weak, but you give in. Feeling overwhelmed with emotions right now. "What the fuck are you gunna be like when I go away in a few weeks huh? You better keep this place spotless you know about the cameras. I'll be watching you." Yes. The oh so lovely cameras. They're only in the kitchen, living room and laundry. The only places you slave away at. "I will iz I promise." She hums. "I'll believe it when i see it. I needa go out and grab some stuff. Make sure dinners ready when I get back." She says before getting her keys and leaving. You then sob. Letting it all out as you shakily grab your phone going to the only person who knows how to comfort you. Ellie.

When she arrives not long after, giving a honk. You go outside and get in the passenger seat. "Off anywhere?" You shake your head. "No that's alright. I don't want to get yelled at.." Ellie sighs. "Bub, you can't keep letting her treat you like this-" "if I left I'd have nowhere to go Els.." She keeps looking at you. "Yes you do. Mine." You let out a small breath looking down at your hands. "Everythings so messy." She nods, even if you can't see. "I know angel but my offer still and will forever stand. I think you should take it." You just wipe the small tears forming at your eyes. "How was your day?" She hates how you change the subject. She always has. She wants to talk about it with you more. Comfort you more. "Pretty easy going. Do you want a hug love?" You shake your head. "Its best if you don't come near me right now-" "I promise it's not gunna affect me if you cry. You know that." You nod. "I know, but I'm sick- thats why she yelled at me.." She furrows her brows. "She got mad at you because you weren't feeling well? What a fucking bitch." You sigh, in the midst of a slight cough. "Angel you should go back in and rest. Let me help-" You immediately shake your head. "She'd know you were there. I- I couldn't risk that." You always felt awful. Not because you got yelled at but because she would want to pick a fight with Ellie too. Ellie was older then Iz too, more mature. Never bought into her crap. "I'll make sure she doesn't yell at you, you really need rest you work your ass off-" You stop her talking. "I don't want her to try anything with you Els." She shakes her head. "She won't. I promise just let me make you some soup and tuck you in. Please, just that." You contemplate whether or not you should but you nod regardless.

She was making the soup trying to be as speedy in hopes she wouldn't bump into Isabel. "Here you go. Say you made it for yourself. I also cleaned a lil." She sends you a wink. And when she says a lil she means the whole lot. "Els, you seriously didn't have to." She smiles gently. "No but I wanted to. I also made something else. Knowing grump would be hungry when she gets back." You look at her so thankful. "You have no idea how much I appreciate you." She gives you a kiss on the head. "Call if you need anything else. I love you." She says while looking in your eyes. "I love you too Els." You respond sweetly. Oh how stupid you were to realize how INlove she was with you. But she plans to show you sooner or later. As she's the one you should truly, be with.

[danikamariewrites]

hi i was going through your eris x bratty reader fics, im literally obsessed with them, and i was wondering if i could request eris saying no to the reader after she asks him to buy her smthn and the reader just starts bawling her eyes out be he's never said no to her🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️ this would literally be so funny, reader would literally be so confused, like what’s no??? what do you MEAN no?????

Did You Just Say No?

Eris x reader

A/n: I love brat tamer Eris 😚

Warnings: bratty reader

Taking you shopping was supposed to be a reward. For you because you managed not to behead any of his advisors this week. And for him to see that stunning smile of yours. Eris loves making you happy, but today he felt like conducting a little experiment.

Eris didn’t punish you earlier this week for acting bratty. He just reprimanded you a little and promised you anything you wanted if you were good until Friday.

You were in the last shop before you and Eris were to go back to the Forest House. A small yet very expensive boutique in the city. You had already picked out an exquisite dress, a pair of shoes to match, and a few other things.

Eris had no idea what you could possibly have left to buy but he waited patiently. You skipped up to your mate holding a beautiful autumn brown tunic with small leaves embroidered on it.

The garment was draped over your arms as you came to a stop in front of Eris, giving him your sweetest smile. “Can I please get this one Eris?”

Eris seemed like he was contemplating his answer. Which was odd. He always said yes. Eris looked you dead in the eyes, face straight and said the worst word ever to you, “No.”

You were so taken aback you physically stepped away from him. Your face contorted in sadness and anger. Your mind was running a million miles a minute, trying to comprehend what Eris had just done.

“What?” Your voice breaks and your eyes narrow at him. “What is no? What do you mean?” Internally you’re panicking. Is this how he’s ending your relationship? Does he not want this dynamic anymore? You weren’t sure you could change, Eris has treated you like a princess since day one.

“No, you cannot have it.” On the inside Eris was praying to the Cauldron you didn’t make a scene right now. Maybe a public place was not the best idea for this experiment.

“Well, why not? You said I can have whatever I want?” Your voice was slowly rising with each word. “Is that not an option anymore?” “No, you just cant have this particular thing. You’ve had enough today.”

Ass soon as the words left his mouth Eris realized it was the absolute wrong thing to say. Your eyes went wide and you couldn’t help the sob that came out of your mouth. Tears started falling fast.

“Do you not want me any more? Just tell me you don’t love me anymore Eris! That’s better than no!” You tossed the tunic onto the chaise lounge in the middle of the boutique, crossing your arms and turning from Eris.

The other patrons kept shopping but occasionally snuck looks at the two of you. Eris was shocked by your words. Of course he loved you, how could he not? You are perfect to him.

Eris lightly grabbed your shoulder, spinning you to face him. “My love,” he says softly, “I will always want you. How could you even think that?” You sniffled, “Because you said no. You never say no.”

“Love, I didn’t know you’d react like this. I’m sorry. Of course you ca get whatever you want.” You stopped crying and leaned away from Eris, a bright smile on your lips. “Yay! Thank you!”

You pecked his cheek and collected the the tunic from lounge, speeding to the cashier to put it with the rest of your shopping.

Eris shook his head. He was happy you bounced back quickly but her was sure you’d give him an attitude about this later.

[spoopieere]

Very long rant

Just expressing my love for these slashers dw

I think none of you understand how bat shit crazy I am about Asa/Arkin and Preston/Jesse. Because- look, I’ve been all over them since 2020 okay? And for the past 3.5 years, I think about them daily. I think about them during meals, while I’m studying, in class, folding laundry- I CRY OVER THEM FFS. Istg I’ve been crying over them in silly angsts situations that I make up in my mind before I go to bed for the past years. I cried to the point that my old pillow cases literally got tear stains stacking and mold underneath bc of how damp it got. My crying got so severe that bawling my eyes out while thinking about them for 1 or 2 hours straight is normal. I cry about them almost every. Fucking. Night. If it’s mild, it’s 10-30 minutes. If it’s worse, 1-2 hours. If it’s severe, 3-4 hours. I cried so much I had to take water breaks, I cried until my head hurts and my eyes swollen. My nightly-crying streak record is 12 DAYS straight- where I cried over them every night. I can make myself cry on the spot if I think about them for too long. Sometimes they’d creep up inside my thoughts and I suddenly wanted to cry in public. I even shed a few tears during class bc I thought of them. They occupy my thoughts like a plague, I think about them so much that I just casually slip an “Arkin.” or “Preston!!” out loud- because I was repeating a scenario in my head. I even have a little self-insert to squeeze in there.

Once I got introduced to C.Ai, I got even worse because I literally cried from 11pm to 5AM while acting out the angstiest scenarios with the Jesse ai bot while rp-big as Preston. Don’t get me even fucking started on how many tears I shed over Asa ai bot while setting my persona as Arkin ( and vice versa ).

I’m so fucking obsessed I bought a black turtleneck bc I thought of Asa the moment I saw it. I always envisioned Asa as a cat. So now every time I see a video or pictures of cats meowing, abandoned cats or cats suffering, searching for their absent owners I just get sad then immediately get reminded of Asa. I compared Preston to a pigeon so now whenever I see any type of birds at all, I immediately think of Preston. I headcannoned Arkin to like fishing, so now IM interested in fishing. I have a ginormous amount of brain rot over these 4 mfs that- me and a mutual of mine, have texting back and forth all of our brainrot almost daily for THE PAST 7 MONTHS (since last June)- AND WE STILL HAVENT RAN OUT OF SHIT TO SAY YET.

AND- by the time I’m writing this it’s 5:45AM in my country, and I’ve just finished another crying session (over Jesse/ Preston this time) that lasted for over hour. Is this normal?? I don’t think it is. Idk what kind of autistic am I but DAMN-

[cherryblossomsinthesnow]

𝘤𝘢𝘧𝘦𝘬𝘪𝘵𝘴𝘶𝘯𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘥𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴 !

small obanai fic idk

you were in your shared small home, sharing it with the one and only, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐚. you think he's sleeping as you're currently making breakfast for the two of you, and planning on waking him up after. but then suddenly you're interrupted from how good it smells, small, broken, muffled sobs come from the bathroom. you turn off the stove, go to check where it's coming from, extremely worried.

"obi...??"

you gently peek inside the bathroom to see obanai, standing and looking at himself in the mirror, bawling.

"y/n!" he yelps, seeing you there and immediately wiping his eyes to try and cover up his crying.

you gently walk up to him, extremely worried and confused.

"w-whats the matter?..." you ask sadly.

"w-..."

"i-i was just thinking about my scar and looking at it made me realize,"

"i-im too ugly for you..."

he tries to hold back sobs.

you gasp at the such harsh and disgusting thought of him being ugly. if he was ugly, you wouldn't be with him at all.

so, why does he think he is ugly...? you think, but then realize he's talking about his mouth scar.

"obi..."

you gently take him into your arms, letting him cry into you. the soft fabric of your shirt gets stained with his tears as he hides his face in your chest.

"you're not ugly. you're 𝐛𝐞𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐟𝐮𝐥. i can't even believe how such harsh words can come out of your mouth."

"you're beautiful and gorgeous, obanai."

"𝘪 love you, so quit spouting this nonsense please."

you gently kiss his mouth scar and he feels so safe and warm in your arms. he's happier than he was 5 minutes ago. he realizes he's not ugly 𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘭, and he's being stupid.

"cmon, i made breakfast."

with a soft kiss to his scar.

(pls i hope i did this right im new to writing help me)

[slvt4tom]

Tom x f! Reader

Okay so I was listening to music and thought abt what to write since I haven't wrote something like this in FOREVER and I'm sorry but here's this

I'm still working on the other one..

Don't mind the fact it's been like a month or more.. Shhh

Y - you

T - tom

F - friend

E - ex (e/n ex name)

Warnings - a little angst

🎀🎀🎀

It was a very dark and gloomy day today and on top of it all ur boyfriend of 7 years just broke up with u today.. So you were walking around crying ur arms crossed over ur stomach basically bawling ur eyes out, u had accidentally bumped into someone so u look up to say sorry and ur eyes are met with beautiful dark brown ones, ur jaw basically dropped the tears turning into just clear stains on ur face and pretty quickly due to the wind tom had noticed but didnt say anything because he didnt know you (yet)

Y - ".. S.. Sorry"

? - "it's okay beautiful"

Your face was such a bright red it wasn't even funny maybe it was love at first sight? You hadn't realized who it was at first but then you took a few steps back and saw it was...

Y - "AREU TOM FREAKING KAUL-"

u get cut off by tom smacking a hand over your mouth making ur eyes go wide and you let out muffled screams but he told you to shh

T - "shh im not gonna hurt u princess, i just need u to quiet down so people dont notice me"

you had quieted down once he started talking and you just nod ur head as he takes his hand off ur mouth he had also asked if you wanted to go home with him, you said yes and he opened up his passenger seat for you to get in next to him. you guys had been talking for a while now outside, in his car on the way home, in his drive way, inside his house.

so i guess thats how you ended up here, cuddling the man of your dreams while watching a movie slowly but surely falling asleep in his soft warm touch, him playing with ur hair pulling u closer and closer by the second not wanting to let go.

the next morning was a whole different story!

u had woke up to the sound of stuff being slammed down, you went to check the time on ur phone and noticed messages spammed all the way down ur phone

"E/N💗 99+ messages"

U heard a big *THUMP* and got out of Tom's bed and went down stairs trying to find ur way to his kitchen once u did u went over to him wrapping ur arms around his shoulders from the top leaning ur head on his back.

Y - "hey are u alright? There's a lot of banging.."

He turned around taking your hands off him putting them at your side and turning back around.

T - "...who is that's guy texting ur phone.."

Y - "huh what are you talking about"

T - "that.. That guy who keeps spamming ur phone.. Are you dating him."

Ur eyes widened and the realization u felt horrible u had totally forgot to change his name in ur contacts after u guys broke up, so you took about an hour or so talking to tom telling him the whole story making sure not to leave out any details even though you guys weren't dating or anything you just wanted to reassure him so nothing got bad before it even started.

After a while of you guys like talking and becoming really good friends he asked u to start dating and obviously u said yes! You guys mad so many great memories over the years and hod so much fun, even when u guys fought you would take a break and then talk it out.

Such a cute healthy relationship!

🎀🎀🎀

Umm okay I got lazy towards the end and it's rushed because I feel I need to get something out so enjoy this pls!

[bisexual-bat]

cute lil oneshot for @sspadfoot <3 (lwk made me cry even tho i wrote it) special delivery <333

It was the last day of 7th year.  James was so excited to go home and see his parents.  And plus, everyone was coming over too. Regulus, Remus, Sirius, Peter, Mary, Dorcas, Pandora, Evan, and even Barty. Marlene was coming too lames was a little nervous about that. Marlene had a sort of crush on his mom. Even though she has her own girlfriend. It made no sense to James, but whatever. They were going to have the best week before everyone had to go.  

They were all getting on the train to go back home. Somehow, they all fit inside one compartment. To be fair there were a lot of people sitting on each other, Barty on Evan, Sirius on Remus, Pandora on Lily, Marlene on Dorcas, regulus on James and there was enough room that Peter and Mary could sit by themselves.  They all were chatting. When the trolley lady came around was an awkward situation, but James made up for it by buying a lot of candy. It was their last year, after all, might as well indulge in the childless while they could.

They all got to platform 9 ¾ and Effie and Monty were nowhere to be seen

Marlene looked around in a very exaggerated manner, “Now. Where is my wife?”

Dorcas looked appalled, “Excuse me?”

“I love you babe, but Euphemia Potter.”

She couldn’t argue with that. Well, they couldn’t find them at the station. So, they all got a ride on the Night Bus to James’ house.  James took the spare key out from underneath the flowerpot and opened the front door.  Effie wasn’t in the living room or the kitchen or the library, neither was Monty.

“Mom!?” “Dad?!” James yelled out.

James remembered his parent’s bedroom, so they checked there next.

“We have gathered here today to remember Euphemia and Fleamont Potter.” James eventually drowned out the speaker and looked at the two caskets in the grass. He watched as they lowered the two caskets side by side forever.  

James kept thinking back to that day. When they all found his parents. Dead in their bed. Holding hands. They were so peaceful. So serene.  The way James started bawling, hitting the floor. All of his friends surrounded him in the biggest hug ever. They all sat there in silence while James sobbed. At one point Lily got up to get him some water.  Somehow, they all moved downstairs to the living room where James was cuddled up in Regulus’ arms while Lily and Pandora made some food and something to drink. Everyone was quiet, huddled around the fire. All sitting in the living room.

                  James walked to the wake with everyone surrounding him.

                  James every day came down to the cemetery to have lunch, dinner, breakfast or just to talk to them.

                              Every day till he was reunited with them.

@im-just-here4853 @sspadfoot

[pitbullwithaship]

DOCTOR WHO LIVEBLOG S4 EP13

HOLY COW IM DYING YALL

WHAT HE DIRECTED IT AT THE HAND

HES THE SAME

MICKEY AND JACKIE HOLY SHIT

He's so fucking fuck

Donna I love you

Ooh they're in a time lock that's really cool

Oh man that's fucked

Yay Sarah Jane and Mickey and Jackie and Martha omg

They're saying Exterminate in German!!! Lol

Rose and the Doctor are so cute

Why can Donna hear her heartbeat

Brilliant. All of them

Walk to their fates

TEAM TARDIS

Holy hell Donna Noooo

HEARTBEAT WHATS AHAPPENING HERE

Omg omg girlie that's time lord energy right there the watchamacalllit stufd

OMG ITS THIS CLIP LOL

YAS JACK PLAY DEAD

LOL LOL LOL I LOVE THIS OMG

That's insane

She is very worth it

Thata insane that's insane destined holy shit

Ooh she speaks German

Omg traitor woman?

Aww poor woman

YAY JACK

Ooh the three are inside the house

Dalek is very very insane

Oh shit oh shit jackie

Omg what us it doing

Oh food Jackie got out

THEY DISINTEGRATED

I hate Davros' voice but maybe that's just cuz of what he's saying

Holy shit he's insane

MICKEY AND JACK REUNITED

Aw Rose likes Martha

JUST LIKE EXPLODE THE EARTH WHAT

JACK AND MICKEY AND JACKIE AND SARAH JANE

Fuck don't guilt trip him so much (I mean yes this regeneration can be a dick sometimes but he's complicated! He's a complicated character!)

Omg omg doctor2 and Donna you better have figured it all out in time

Omg omg omg omg omg omg

DONNA YAY

DONNA HOLY HELL

OHyes

DoctorDonna!!!!

I love her ao much this is hilarious

This is amazing

Jackie looks on disapprovingly

JACK YOU DUDE

SUPREME DALEK HAS A CONCIENCE

Oh wow that's a lot of dying Daleks

Davros stop playing the victim

As it's meant to be flown this is amazing

K9 AAAHHHH

I love this so much

AS ITS MEANT TO BE FLOWN

Yeah Jackie don't touch anything

Oh wow that's amazing

This is so cute the teams all together god (can you tell my favorite trope is found family)

HUGGING LOTS OF HUGGING

Everybody hugs!!!

Awwww

Aww maybe Martha's joining Torchwood

Aww Mickey

BAD WOLF BAY

Donna oh my gosh

Awww he can spend it with her

It's so cute

And so sad

I LOVE YOU AAAAAHHHHH AAAAHHHHH AAAHHHH AAHHHHH KISS

And other Doctor leaves with Donna omg this is so happysadterribleanamazingendingforrose holt crap

Binary x100 jeezus

Oh no Donna

Doctor is so sad

Oh Donna

Oh Doctor

FUCK THIS IS SAD AGAIN

...and the worst of times but the best are the best and they are times

One last HUG FUCK

Okay definitely not what she wanted consent and all but he's incredibly traumatized and doesn't want to lose anyone else so I kinda understand

Fuck he's just a story for her Fuck

This is breaking my heart

Aww poor Doctor

Fuck I'm crying

He's a fucking wetpuppydog in the rain fuck sadness

WILF IM CRYING

Alone again alone again (this song plays in my head a lot watching this damn show)

End note. End note. Fuck this I'm bawling my eyes out. Okay. All I can say is he's so frickin lonely and he's always the odd one out and "all the others have got someone" you idiot they love you you could crash on their fuckin couches for ten years and they'd fondly just deal with it cuz they love you you fuck. Aaaghh. But also I totally understand that as the third in a trio and the fifth in a fifth and the seventh in what should have been a six. But also dude. Develop an EQ please. And also I am crying so much, even more than frickin Doomsday made me cry. Fuck.

[eomayas]

may i ask a baekhyun scenario? unplanned pregnancy and he doesn't want the baby. reader resists. anything about cold/bad/fucboy or what else 🤣 but happy end please. 🥺🥺 I want to see s/o's happiness.

omg 😭 anon i’m so sorry for how this turned out i hope you like it 😭😭😭 fuckboy baekhyun makes me feel insane i feel crazy for writing this! beware of the worst baekhyun you’ll probably ever read on my page ! i do not condone this behavior at all yall.. have fun with this. thank you for the ask also!! 🩷🩷

unplanned • bbh [req]

pairing: fuckboy!baekhyun x pregnant!reader, fwb (?) relationship

synopsis: you find out you’re pregnant with baekhyuns baby, and he wants nothing to do with you (or it).

genre: ANGSTTTTTTTTTT

warnings: swearing, mentions of smut, baekhyun is awful, like really awful. reader has a poor sense of self worth/respect :((. but the ending is kind of happy (ish??).

two red lines only mean one thing on this test; so does the word ‘pregnant’. three pregnancy tests lay on your bathroom counter, all concluding the same thing: you’re pregnant.

“well?” your friend, chaeyoung, asks on the other line. you called her when you woke up vomiting, after feeling nauseous for the last three days. she’s the one who bought you the tests, dropping them off at your work on her lunch break and telling you to call her immediately when you take them.

you don’t even know how your lasted at work today, feeling sick the entire day and vomiting every time you went to the bathroom. you had hoped it was just food poisoning, and had managed to convince yourself all day that it was, even when chaeyoung brought you the tests. up until now, your hope for food poisoning was going strong.

letting out a shaky breath, you say, “well, im pregnant,” your voice breaking on the last syllable. a nasty sob escapes your mouth and you drop the phone onto the counter, covering your mouth as the tears start streaming. your whole body shakes as you bawl into your hands, your tears gathering in your hands and sliding down your arms.

“i’m coming over,” you hear chaeyoung say, and you start shaking your head as if she can see you.

“no, chae, it’s fine,” you cry, wiping underneath your eyes with the back of your hand, though it does nothing because the tears keep flowing. you’re not ready to have a baby, not even close. it wasn’t even planned.

“y/n, i’m coming over,” your friend says. you can hear shuffling, and you panic as you try to find the nicest way to tell her to stay the hell away from you.

“chae, stop please! i just want to be alone right now,” you sniffle and hear her sigh.

“you need support.”

“i haven’t even told baekhyun,” you moan out, the realization crashing down on you. that alone makes you start bawling again, not ready to deal with him and his reaction to this.

“oh god. y/n, i feel like i should come over,” chaeyoung says, and because she’s your best friend and you don’t have any energy to fight with her, you mumble an ‘ok’.

twenty minutes later, chaeyoung arrives with boba and a few snacks. you feel drained, and your skin feels tight due to the dried tears on your face. chaeyoung throws her arms around you once she’s inside of your apartment and all of her items are on the counter.

the two of you don’t say anything as you hug tightly, silently crying on her shoulder. chaeyoung rubs your back soothingly and tells you that it’ll be okay, but you don’t believe her. there’s so many things that you need to do, like tell your family, figure out doctors appointments, build a nursery, talk to the father of your child. but nothing feels possible, it all feels overwhelming and out of reach. “cmon, let’s sit,” chaeyoung says, grabbing the drinks and walking into your living room.

the both of you sit on your couch and pop the straws through the film lid, and drink. you barely take a sip, letting your lips wrap loosely around the straw, your mind everywhere but here. “talk ti me, y/n. let it all out,” chaeyoung says, scooting closer to you and wrapping her arms around you. you lean into her and let out a shaky breath.

all you can think about is baekhyun, and his reaction. you know it’ll be bad, and you’ll probably end up crying like you always do. he doesn’t spare your feelings ever, and can’t imagine him doing so when you tell him, and it makes your heart ache in the worst way. if your relationship wasn’t already messy and bad enough, it just got incredibly worse.

“i cant tell baekhyun,” you say. you feel chaeyoung let out a breath, and you’re grateful that you can’t see her face, because her expression would definitely make you cry. chaeyoung hates baekhyun, to put it simply, and has made ir clear that she doesn’t support you fucking with him to any degree.

“you know you have to,” she says. you close your eyes to keep the tears at bay. “do it now, before it’s too late.” and by too late, she means before you have 3 months to figure out if you’re going to be a single parent, or not.

you’d like to think that baekhyun wouldn’t be against raising this baby with you, but you know, deep down, that he he is going to be. hell would have to freeze over before he’d even consider playing the role of this baby’s father.

you pull yourself out of chaeyoungs embrace and lean back against the couch. you feel her eyes on you, and you take a drink of your boba to busy yourself. “you know i’ll always be here for you,” she says, and you nod. chaeyoung and you have been through a lot, emotionally, and it all started when you began sleeping with baekhyun. she hated (and still does) the way he treated you, like you a toy he could play with when he was bored. he’d call you up in the middle of the night and tell you to come over, hed show up unannounced and expect you to be ready and waiting for him, hed message and go out with other women, and you’d still stick around. for some reason, you defended him from all of her criticisms, which was the main reason the both of you stopped communicating for awhile.

“i know,” you say quietly.

“and i care about you. which is why this is the one and only time i’m going to tell you to call him, because he deserves to know,” she says, running a hand through her hair. you think back to your phone that you left in the bathroom, and you wished you would have flushed it down the toilet instead.

you can’t even think about what you’d even text him. you rarely ever ask him for favors, like to call you, nor do you ever really text him. you once tried to keep a conversation with him, but by the third text he stopped responding, and didn’t respond for days until he told you he was on his way to your house.

begrudgingly, you get up and walk to the bathroom to retrieve your phone. you open it and click on your messages with baekhyun, and start to scroll.

thursday

y/n: are you busy?

6:23 pm

baekhyun: come over

11:53 pm

tuesday

y/n: come over?

7:30 pm

saturday

y/n: come to onyx tonite

8:50 pm

friday

baekhyun: come over

10:35 pm

y/n: ok omw

10:37 pm

you could cry, looking at the messages. it’s pathetic, really. you guys never really communicated beyond being in the bed with each other. the only times you both talked, was during the beginning, but once he figured out that you were at his beck and call, the talking dwindled. sometimes, all you got from him were grunts, not even a greeting.

you sulk back into the living room, phone in hand and dignity in the garbage. “what do i even say?” you ask your friend.

“tell him to come over,” she sighs, rubbing her forehead. you bite your bottom lip and aimlessly type the message and send it without second thought. you gingerly take a seat on the couch, your phone burning a hole in your hand.

you expected silence, and after ten minutes and no response from him, you sigh and pick your phone up, contemplating if you should text him again. “just do it,” chaeyoung says, reading your mind. and so you double text him, for the first time since you two got involved. in the beginning, you didn’t feel uneasy about double texting, but that fear quickly seeped in when he simply wouldn’t respond, like ever, to any message if you sent more than one.

when you don’t get another response after a total of thirty minutes, you dial his number, almost blindly. you can’t even remember the last time you called him, but you have this number memorized despite it all. it’s tattooed in your brain from all the times you wanted to but didn’t.

the line rings and rings, until you get the message to leave a voicemail. so you do. “hey, baek… come over when you get this,” you say, and quickly end the call. your stomach has dropped to your ankles, and you want to die.

chaeyoung anxiously chews at her fingernails. “call again,” she says.

“but he’s not going to answer. and i dont want to tell him over the phone,” you say, tightly holding your phone between your hands.

“just try again. trust me.”

so you do. and to your surprise, he answers towards the last couple of rings, pure agitation in his voice. “fuck, y/n, what?” he asks. baekhyun pushes the forehead of sohee, the girl currently on her knees in between his legs, away from his crotch. “what do you want?” he asks, running a hand through his hair. sohee rests her cheek against his thigh and looks up at him, and baekhyun smirks down at her and drags a hand down the side of her face before pulling at her bottom lip with his thumb.

“i-i just wanted to see if you were free,” you say, cursing yourself mentally and not having your shit together. baekhyun didn’t like when you were unsure or nervous about something; it turned him off. if you were indecisive about going to his house or yours, he’d just cancel all together. “just come over when you can, ‘kay?” you say, pacing the living.

“yeah, okay, whatever. that it?” he asks, pulling him thumb out of sohee’s mouth.

“yes, by-“ he doesn’t let you finish and hangs up, tossing his phone behind him and looking down at the poor girl between his legs. if she had any bit of brains, she’d leave now and never look back. but like most of the women baekhyun is involved with, they never do.

when baekhyun is done with sohee, he leaves without as much as a goodbye. he vaguely tells her he’ll see her again, but never specifies when. she watches him leave, feeling confused and empty and wanting more. and maybe that’s why they all stick around for him, because he leaves them feeling like a piece of them is missing and they’re desperately chasing it, trying to get it back.

he decides to entertain you and come over, despite your neediness. that’s another thing baekhyun didnt appreciate; clingy and neediness. he hated when women wanted him so much, it made him feel trapped and confined. baekhyun didn’t like feeling trapped or tied down to anything.

baekhyun doesn’t text you that he’s on his way, he just shows up at your door. when you hear the knocks, you jump up, having forgotten that he was supposed to come over because two hours feels like ages ago.

when you look through the peephole, your heart drops and your palms start to sweat. you pull the door open and baekhyun up-nods at you and let’s himself in. you close the door behind him and lean against it as he comfortably makes his way through your house. that is all about to change in a few seconds.

you make your way into the living room and see bakehyun sitting on your couch, scrolling through his phone. he looks up when he hears your foot steps, and frowns. “why are you acting weird?” he asks.

“i’m not,” you definitely are.

“yes, you are. stop it,” he says, going back to his phone. it’s now or never.

“baekhyun, i need to talk to you,” you say, still standing in the entry of your living room. he lets out a sigh and looks at you, his expression a cross between irritation and panic.

“about what?” he all but groans out. when you asked him over, he had expected (and hoped) for less talking and a lot more sex.

you lick your lips and shyly cross your arms in front of your chest. “i’m… im pregnant,” you say, looking him in the eye. he stares at you blankly, his mind unable to process your words.

“what?”

“baekhyun…” you say, taking a step towards him and then retreating. you really can’t say it again; it’s already too real.

“you’ve got to be fucking with me? you’re fucking with me, right?” he says, running a hand through his dark hair. you only shake your head, and he scoffs. “well, it’s not mine.” he says plainly, going back to his phone.

at this, you frown. “what? yes it is, baekhyun. i’ve only slept with you,” you say, a storm brewing in your head at him insinuating that you’ve been sleeping around. if anybody’s been sleeping around, it’s him. when you two first got together, he had asked you not to sleep with anybody else, and you didn’t see anything wrong with that. but now, you feel like maybe you should have.

“i don’t care; you don’t have any proof, y/n. that baby isn’t mine,” he says harshly. tears come to your eyes and you blink them away.

“this baby is yours! and you’re going to help me raise it!” you say, wiping at your eyes.

“like hell i am. i don’t give a fuck, y/n. i don’t want this baby, and you shouldn’t either. we aren’t even fucking together,” he spits, shaking his head, and that weight settles. you and baekhyun don’t even have a relationship label. you wouldn’t even know how to refer to him if somebody asked you who he was to you. friend was too mild, because you do things most friends don’t do to each other, and you don’t know that much about him. lovers isn’t even remotely true, because there is no love between the two of you. you’re somewhere higher than a friend, but lower than a lover, which is practically hell.

your mind drifts off to remember the time he invited you to his family’s barbecue. you practically met everyone in his family, danced with his grandma and little cousins, helped his mother in the kitchen. you thought he’d ask you out after that, but he never did. instead, he constantly reminded you that you two were not together.

“i don’t care,” you say quietly. “this is your baby. you’re going to help.” you tell him.

“y/n, i always use a condom. this baby isn’t fucking mine—what don’t you understand?”

you shake your head. for all of the times he’s used a condom, there is, of course, the one time he didn’t. and you remember it clear as day. you were the one who told him to get one, even though both of you were tipsy, you were still able to understand that. he told you he’d pull out, and did everything but. you can still remember the feeling of being so full of him. it still makes your knees weak.

“you didn’t the night after sehuns party,” you say.

“it was one time!” he shouts, as if he never took sex-ed. one time is all it takes—everybody knows that. “fuck, y/n. why do you want to keep this baby. are you trying to ruin my life?”

“i’m not trying to do anything. you think i want to be pregnant? baekhyun, i’m only 27! i’m not ready to be a fucking mother, but this is my reality right now!” you yell back, and it dawns on you that this is the most you’ve both ever spoken in a single meeting.

he shakes his head. “what do you want from me, y/n? i’m not raising this fucking baby with you—i’ll pay for you to get rid of it, but i’m not raising it. there’s no fucking way,” he says, standing up. you start to panic, stepping closer to him.

“what are you doing?”

“getting the fuck out of here,” he says, trying to push past you. you stop him, putting your hands on his chest. “y/n, move.”

“no. we need to talk about this.”

“there’s nothing to talk about! i’m not raising this baby with you, and that’s it. i don’t care what you do with it, but leave me out of it,” he says, removing your hands from his chest and brushing past you, his shoulder bumping into your arm in the process. “and lose my fucking number.” baekhyun says as he pulls your front door open and steps out, slamming it as he goes.

you can’t help but crumple to the floor, feeling like a rug has been swept from underneath you. you shake uncontrollably as you sob, fat tears rolling dons your face for the nth time today.

for some reason, you feel like a weight has been lifted off of you even though your world feels like it’s been flipped on it’s axis. you know you’ll be bound to baekhyun for life, as long as this baby is alive, whether either of you like it or not. but at least he knows, and maybe he will grow up and come around.

and you feel a sense of peace for the first time ever since he’s ever departed from you. usually, you feel hollow, used, and muddled; always in a constant state of anxiety when he’s around or when you think about him. but him leaving was probably the best things he’s ever done for you. now you can be sure he won’t be coming here unannounced, interrupting peaceful sleep at ungodly hours. now, you can rid yourself of unnecessary stress and drama, albeit unfortunate circumstances.

yes, you’ll be bound to baekhyun for life. but there are definitely worse things that could happen to you. and who knows, maybe he’ll change his mind.

[juuheizou]

Errrmmmmm,,,,,,,,, ik im basically making u relive ur anger and hatred against post rue mutsuki but i need hcs for a a post rue mutsuki who’s a depressed alcoholic and ur the only real one xoxo

Friend, in order to relive it, I would have to have stopped living it at some point. ANYWAY, can't leave anyone who calls me the only real one hanging, so here we go! This is in such a random bullet point format because trying to articulate my thoughts in a way thats actually organized and makes sense is part of why it's taken me too damn long to answer

maybe it's a matter of "show more unglamorous depression/trauma" or maybe it's just vibes, but for whatever reason, I've always seen Mutsuki as a hypersomniac after Rushima, even when it was fresh and I tried to write an angsty hurt/comfort fic (it was HORRIBLE and I RAN OUT OF IDEAS so I gave up and deleted it lmao) about it rather than the action-packed casefic I ended up writing.

he blames himself so deeply for what happened. every step of the way no matter how irrational, in his mind, was all his fault, if he just reacted sooner, if he was stronger, if he just let Torso torture him to death, if he never lived to see Rushima in the first place

he basically disappears all over again once he makes it back to the mainland. barely gets out of bed let alone leaves his apartment, when he does drag himself to work he doesn't talk to anyone and never seems to be all there, and he definitely doesn't go anywhere other than those two places anymore

NUMBNESS. his bleeding heart was the first domino to fall in the lead-up to Rushima, and it's still buried in there, but he's just so... slow... to react... and like I said, often not all there when he's out and about. On the inside he might be crying, or more likely screaming at himself to react to an upsetting case or colleague having a bad day, but instead he's just there, listless and blank like a piece of the background, and only when he's alone in the safety of his apartment will he bawl his eyes out over the situation and his added guilt for doing nothing

in canon, he's a happy, outgoing drunk, and I think his first drink is an attempt to psych himself up for some meeting with Saiko or Suzu or someone close to him, or something like that, that he just really didn't want this new side of him to rip away

it becomes his way to psych himself up for anything he doesn't feel like he can leave his apartment to do but look! if he just has a little drink first, he can do it and won't let those he cares about down, and anyone but the most perceptive and close to him (you know damn well who I see that being) would think great! Look how happy he is! How much fun he's having! We were so worried about him, but look at him, smiling and laughing and talking to us!

before he even knows it, he's drinking to feel normal

from there the consequences can go in so many directions I honestly can't pick just one knock yourself out

[buckyalpine]

hii so im not sure if you’re taking requests but if you are could you maybe to one where readers dog is having to be put down and she’s like rlly rlly upset and bucky comforts her? just like fluff x100 Im going through this right now and idrk what to do :/ thank you if you make it and if not I love all of your other works :)

Warnings: pet loss, angst, fluff

I don't even have a pet myself (I do babysit one) and this made me bawl ffs. I'm ugly crying so hard writing this rn. I'm so sorry this is something you have to go through, I'm sending you all the hugs, every single hug imaginable.

I imagined this with beefy Bucky, where he's still uncomfortable with physical touch which is why his comfort is so significant here.

You walked into the compound with red puffy eyes, you hoped and prayed that you wouldn't run into anyone because you didn't need anyone asked you what was wrong. Your sweet baby looked at you with tired eyes from the crate, it was like they knew. They blinked before putting their head down again, resting on one of their favorite teddies to play with.

You felt another wave of tears seeing them close their eyes, too tried to stay awake till you got to your room. You tried to get there as fast as you could before the cries escaped your lips. Bucky watched you carefully as he sat in the kitchen with his coffee, distress was evident on your face but he didn't want to pry. You ran to your room and locked the door, taking your fur baby in your arm for a final day of loving and hugs.

"I'm sorry baby" You whimpered, holding them close to your chest. They nuzzled into you, their paw on your shoulder, looking up at you and licking away some of the tears. Their eyes looked happy, as if they was ready. They knew it was their time and they needed you to know too.

It's okay mama.

You spent the day doing everything you could with them, giving them all the treats you could, taking them to their favorite spot in the park and giving them all the belly rubs you could. You took as many pictures as you could; you knew it would hurt each time you looked at them but you never wanted to forget this day.

Evening rolled around and you felt inconsolable. They slept by your side while you cuddled them close, you knew they had lived a long life. You'd given them every ounce of love you could but it still didn't feel like enough. If you could have just one more day. One more.

*****

You arrived back to the compound, all their little things in a box. Their collar. A little tag with their birthday date. A little clay mold to remember their paws. You hadn't told anyone because the sympathy would have hurt more but now the silence that filled your room was unbearable.

Bucky walked by your room, hearing your soft cries and the absence of paws pattering on the floor. His heart dropped, connecting the dots, he knew you didn't say anything but there was no way he was going to leave you alone during this time.

"Y/n" He knocked your door softly, while calling for you, only getting a muffled whimper in response. He opened the door, to find you wrapped up in your blankets, your face buried into your pillow to silence your sobs.

"I'm here, its okay" He didn't second guess anything, pulling you into his lap and tucking your body against his large frame. He wrapped his arms securely around you, surrounding you with his warmth, your hear resting under his chin. He made you feel protected, like you had someone to look after you again; less untethered while he held you firmly.

You tried to bite your lip to keep your cries in but the stronger he held you the harder it was to keep everything inside. Your face was in his chest, tears soaking his shirt as you let all your emotions go, melting into Bucky's arms.

"I'm here, I'm here angel, shhh" Bucky's voice was soft, his lips pressing soft kisses onto your head. His hands soothed you, rubbing your skin while your body trembled, his heart breaking because he'd only ever seen you smile.

The night wasn't easy, you'd woken up searching for your baby, only to find their spot empty. Bucky made sure he was there for you the entire time, holding you to his chest,

"Do you want to talk about it?" He whispered when he knew you were unable to fall asleep. You swallowed thickly, your throat feeling hoarse. Had anyone else asked you, you may have said no but Bucky was different. You nodded, recalling all the memories you had from when they were a puppy and all the adventures you had along the way.

"You loved them so much, couldn't have asked for a better mama" Bucky smiled down softly at you, his hand lacing with yours. "You took such good care of them. Even if it was just for a little while, you made them really happy. Showed them so much love. That's all they ever knew, how much you loved them"

You nodded, sniffling while he continued to hold you.

"Now you have all these beautiful memories with them. Those will never go away. They'll always be with you y/n, always" He kissed your forehead while you closed your eyes, your heart feeling a tiny sliver of peace. Even if you didn't have them forever, you had the best few years with them and you wouldn't have traded that time for the world.

"You can cry if you want to, I know the pain won't go away but you don't have to hold it inside. I'm always here to listen if you need"

And true to his word, Bucky made sure he checked in with you regularly. He had no problem hugging you through the night. During nights you found it difficult to be in your room, he quickly carried you over to his. The rest of the team were surprised to see him let anyone else there but he didn't feel an ounce of discomfort.

He knew pain. He thought about all the time all he needed was a hug and how he was met with cold silence instead. He would never let that happen to one of the sweetest people he'd ever met. No. He'd make sure you got the love you deserved. He coaxed you to get out more. Small walks. Trips to the coffee shop. Anything to keep you away from locking yourself in your room.

*****

He held you close, your head resting on his chest, his heart beat lulling you to sleep. You finally felt a sense of acceptance but the warmth of his arms was something you wanted to hold onto.

"Thank you Bucky" You whispered, snuggling further into his hold, it was clear to both of you, you wouldn't be leaving his arms ever any time soon.

"Of course angel" Bucky smiled softly, stroking your hair. He'd hold you forever as long as you felt safe.

[bubbledtee]

bub i dont think ill never stop thinking about those james nd his baby girl thoughts :((( couldn't help but think about this from some kind of monster........

WHAT IF I FELL TO MY KNEES AND STARTED CRYING IN THE FROZEN FOOD AISLE</333 the way the two of them would be inseparable and when james nd you are at the store with her hes always picking up those silly little 'daddys girl' onesies with frilly little flowers and hearts on em and he holds them up to her and asks her which one she thinks would look better on her... shes just babbling to him and ur just like !!!!!!!!!cause you just love them so much!!!!!

and when shes older nd you cant make it to her ballet lessons so james shows up and hes just converses with the other moms as if he *is* one..... like.... "oh that one over there is mine... yeah i know she always gets tripped up on her releves but i think she'll be alright" and the other moms are just staring at him in shock about how much he keeps up with his daughters ballet...

uuugghhhh and when your pregnant and the two of you are lying in bed he's just talking to the lil baby inside your tummy and kissing it all over cause he cant wait any longer</33 not to mention the amount of time and money he spends on the nursery... u come back home from running errands and james is just covered in paint talking about how he has a new changing station coming in the mail because he didn't like how the other one he chose looked too uncomfortable for the baby.....

and whenever she gets up at night he always ushers u back to sleep cause he knows ur so worn out after labor (lets not forget the baby blues and post partum depression :(((( )) so he always tells you he's got it handled (and he surprisingly does cause after a few minutes shes already back to sleep!!!!) and ur just sitting in bed wondering how u could score a man so perfect UGH can u tell that im not okay with these thoughts </333 he's literally soooo sweet carolina by lana del rey.....

it’s too early for me to be crying over having a child with this man. he’d be the perfect father to our little girl.

just imagine when you tell him you’re pregnant. that man is breaking down into (happy) tears and falling to his knees to hug your tummy and kiss it. especially if it’s with death magnetic to htsd era james because he’d have been worried he was too old to get you pregnant. but then his prayers would be answered when he came home from the studio one day and you gave him the best surprise he could’ve ever asked for.

and then at your first ultrasound, that man is an absolute mess. reality would be seriously setting in for him and he’s trying so hard not to bawl his damn eyes out. and when you get in the car to go home he’s just got the biggest, sweetest smile on his face and he’ll just start talking about how you should plan on doing the nursery. he’s also just so excited to tell friends and family he can hardly contain himself.

god and during your labor hes so supportive. he’ll sit with you and rub your back during your contractions, telling you how well you’re doing and how proud he is of you and how excited he is to meet your little girl. when you’re crying from how much pain you’re in, he’s kissing your forehead and trying not to cry himself because he hates seeing you in any sort of distress. but it’s all worth it for the both of you when she’s finally out and you’re both admiring how beautiful she is and the love you both have for her is so strong you can’t stop crying.

i need to stop talking abt this i could go on for hours.

[eggcompany]

He's Just A Baby Part 3

In the morning Daryl brushed his hair, pulled his layers down to just one pair of light wash jeans, clean underwear, socks, and a nice muted blue button up shirt that he ripped the arms off of. He walked down the stairs and saw Carol in the kitchen with Sophia, eating. Daryl wasn’t hungry. He just felt… like he was drifting. It didn’t feel like he was walking, breathing, anything. He was just moving. 

He just sort of hung in the doorway. He could feel Carol looking at him. The staring. It broke him down and he started sobbing. It started off with just his shoulders hitching up and his face going down and his breath quickening. 

He halfway heard Carol send Sophia to go play with Carl or help Lori. She came and hugged him as he sobbed right there in the entry of the kitchen. He grabbed the back of the loose yellow shirt she was wearing and just held on and let out croaked out sobs as tears and snot flowed from his face. 

“What’s wrong? What happened, Daryl? Come sit down. “ Carol asked and rubbed the boy’s back and tried to pull away but Daryl only squeezed her tighter. He sobbed loudly, bawling out like nothing else. Carol turned her head and kissed his forehead. Whatever happened between him and Merle, or him and the officers, it was… unimaginable. 

When he started to just huff out breaths and hyperventilate Carol pulled him away from her. She watched as he retracted his hands to hold them loosely at his chest, they were shaking. He was shaking. He just closed his eyes and sobbed, his breath hiccuping and short. 

“Daryl. Listen. Listen to me. Breathe. Big breath in. Big breath out. Good. Do it again.” Carol instructed him and he listened. He started taking forced big breaths and walked to where Carol wanted him, the kitchen table. He sat down and looked at her. He just couldn’t get out what he wanted to say, he didn’t really know what to say. He just hurt . All over he hurt . 

“Big breaths.” Carol reminded him and got him a glass of water from a jug. His head started to clear up after the fifth or sixth big deep breath he got in. He drank the water quickly, his throat was achey. Carol sat down next to him and let their knees touch. 

“Do you want to tell me what happened?” Carol said and Daryl looked down at his hands. He chewed on the inside of his lip. 

“Merle…. I got in a fight with Merle.” The boy said and his lip started to shake and his eyes watered back up. Of course Carol had heard what Rick had to say about the encounter but it was different hearing it from the person who actually went through it. Carol nodded and waited. 

“He was all strung out and and I told him I didn’t wanna follow him ‘round no more. I told him I wanna stay with this group. He was jus’ bein’ mean. Hateful. Told ‘im I hated ‘im.” Daryl said as tears dripped down from his eyes to leave dark marks on his jeans. Carol pulled his chair to be next to her and hugged the boy to her side. He was just crying and sniffling quietly. 

“I’m sorry Daryl. I know you really care about him. Maybe being away from him for a while will help heal things. WE’ll probably cross paths sooner or later. How about you just stop worrying about him, which I know is hard, but just worry about you .” Carold advised and the boy nodded and wiped his face. He just sat and a big frown on his face. 

“Al-alright.” Daryl said and laid his head down on his arms on the cool table top. 

He didn’t process the sound of small footsteps getting closer. Only when Carol spoke he noticed the girl had come back into the house. 

“Hey Soph, whatcha got?” Carol asked her daughter who had something in her small hands. Sophia smiled and Carl was peeking from around the corner of the doorway. 

“I got Daryl a cookie cause he looked sad. Look, it's got candy in it. They’re really stale but they’re still good!” Sophia said and handed her mother the stale treat. It had many small m&m like candies all over it. Carl peeked through and walked to the woman too. Daryl kept his head down but listened. He didn’t wanna be mean to the other kids. Other kids. 

“Hey Carl.” Carol said and set the cookie on the napkin she had set her spoon on when she ate breakfast. Carl smiled and held up a glass bottle full of… something. 

“Me and Shane went to look through the houses and look. Yoo-hoo.” Carl announced and Daryl picked his head up slowly to look at the bottle. His eyes were red and his face was splotchy. Carl held it up and waggled it in front of the older boy's face. 

“A whole case of these. Plus milk goes with cookies.” Carl said and Daryl rolled his eyes and let out a ‘pff’ and grabbed the bottle and the kids went running off. He stared at the bottle for a long moment.

“I never got these. I wanted em but daddy never let me. Said they weren’t for us.” Daryl said and smiled up at Carol before popping the lid off and drinking some. Thankfully Carl had already shaken it. 

“I can drink all of this?” Daryl asked. 

“‘Course it’s yours.” Carol said and slid the cookie over to him. She’d never seen someone drink chocolate milk so fast, Daryl practically shoved the cookie down his throat. He was smiling when he was done, he burped, and Carol gave him a look. 

“What?” Daryl asked and stood up, he felt better and looked better. Crumbs and all. 

“We say-” Carol started but Daryl waved his hand. 

“Excuse me.” Daryl said and walked toward the door, grabbing his bow from where he set it against the wall. He stopped in the doorway and hesitated. 

“‘M gonna ask Grimes if I can take one of the shopping carts. Maybe me and Sophia can see if we can find some stuff.” Daryl said nervously. His hand twitched over the heft of his bow. Carol trusted him with Sophia, he would always keep her safe. 

“Sure, make sure to stay close, don’t lose each other, and make sure to bring back everything useful.” Carol told him and Daryl nodded and walked off. He was such a good boy, thought the woman. 

Later rather than sooner Daryl came running down the street with a train of garden wagons being pulled behind him. Sophia laughing hysterically from the second one. Each was full of stuff. They had started collecting each wagon and tying them together since they were more compact than the two shopping carts the group had. After a few miles of walking Sophia said she was tired so Daryl plunked her down on one of the carts with the few things she’d wanted and the stuff they got for Carol. 

They decided that the big box of fruity sweet cereal could be their secret since they were bringing so much back to the group. Daryl had taken out six or so walkers and retrieved his arrows. They had raided every pantry, gun cabinet, drawer, and medicine cabinet they could find. 

They had eight wagons in their own little caravan, one holding medicine and anything that looked like medicine or toothpaste. Sophia had read most of the labels. The next holding Sophia, some shoes and slippers, a stuffed unicorn, and a backpack that Daryl had filled with special stuff for Carol. The third had clothes and shoes. After that it was a mix of weapons, kitchen utensils, food, cleaners, and other doodads that could be useful. 

Daryl was running until he got to the third house away from the group and realized he couldn’t stop. 

“Shit!” Daryl yelled as Shane and T-dog ran up to help him slow the wagon train down. Daryl just moved to the side and snatched Sophia up out of it and set her down on the grass. 

Thankfully Shane could slow it down enough it couldn;t do any damage and T-dog walked it to a stop. Shane gave Daryl a look but when he realized just how much the kids had brought back he shook his head. 

“Quite the haul kid.” Shane said as the rest of the group came over to look. Andrea and Amy were laughing with Lori over the fact the kids had been playing Trains in the middle of the apocalypse. 

“Yeah. Look, food and stuff. This is me and Sophia’s stuff though. Dibs.” Daryl said as the little girl ran up to stand by their wagon. She threw her arm around his side and shook her head. 

“Yeah our stuff. We found the unicorn.” Sophia said proudly with her thin chest puffed up which made Carol’s heart happy. Seeing Daryl be so kind made her so happy. 

“Alright hot shots, this is great. Good job guys. Really this is great. You guys deserve whatever that stuff is y’all dibbed.” Rick said as he smiled and started looking through the wagons. Daryl started untying the wagons after Shane failed to do so. He explained that the front was medicine and the food was under the clothes. Him and Sophia got their wagon, getting pats on the backs as they made their way to a grinning Carol. 

“I thought you two might have run off. You missed lunch.” Carol said with a smile glued to her face. Daryl grinned but looked down at the ground. Sophia shook her head.

“Nope we had lunch but it’s a secret. Right, Daryl?” Sophia asked with her arms crossed and she elbowed him in the side. Daryl nodded his head with a fake serious face on. 

“Oh yeah, very secret stuff. Can’t tell nobody.” Daryl said with all seriousness. Sophia giggled and Daryl let out a huff and pulled the wagon into the kitchen of the house. Sophia grabbed her unicorn and the few things she got and ran up to her staked claim. Daryl got the backpack and stood there with a smile on his face. 

“Did you find a nice new backpack?” Carol asked and looked at the backpack as she sat down. Daryl shook his head and sat down opposite of her. 

“We was lookin’ for guns in side tables and I found stuff for you.” Daryl said and looked up at Carol, she swore his eyes were sparkling. She smiled at him. He really was a sweetheart. 

“You didn’t have to get me anything! That’s very nice though.” Carol said and Daryl nodded and unzipped the bag. He pulled out a bundle of what looked like a jean vest. 

“See there was a lady who lived there and she had clothes like you do so we took her closet but this one’s special. See it gots a bird on it.” Daryl explained and unfolded the vest to show that there was a bluebird embroidered on one of the front breast pockets. Carol looked at it, it was a very nice vest. Good quality and had plenty of pockets. 

“Thank you Daryl, this is perfect. I’ll wear it a lot.” Carol said and smiled and folded it and put it to the side as Daryl pulled out something else. 

Daryl had gathered up a pearl handled pocket knife, a few light button ups, a pair of ladies hiking boots in her size, and a pin with a flower on it. Daryl looked at Carol nervously when he was done. Carol hugged him and thanked him. 

“That was a very nice thing you did today. You helped everyone in the camp. You did such a good thing.” Carol said and sat back down to try on the boots which were very nice. A sturdy pink material with a lovely cushiony sole. Daryl smiled and looked down, his face turning red. He reached into the bag again. 

“Um… I took this from a kids room. I didn’t tell Sophia. It’s… I want it.” Daryl said sternly, making a point. He pulled out a small easy reader book with a picture of a deer on the front. “Wildlife” was the title. It was maybe twenty pages thick and small, maybe seven inches tall and five inches wide. Carol took it from him gently and opened it to flick through a few pages. 

“This is a great book. After dinner we can take a look. Lori, me, and Shane are going to the school tomorrow in the pickup truck. You should come, too. Me and you can go see what we can find in the elementary and the others can check the nurses and cafeteria.” Carol said and gave Daryl back his book which he put right back in the backpack. Daryl thought about it and nodded. 

“Okay, can we find books like this one? I like this one. Maybe we can bring a rug back too like they had when I went to school.” Daryl said hopefully and looked up at Carol. He remembered that when he went to school they all sat on a big colorful rug when they got read to. He liked that rug. 

“Absolutely. We can all probably get a wagon in the back of the truck. That was a very good idea to bring those. Now, let's go see what else you brought us!” Carol said and lead Daryl back outside where everyone was pulling out all the clothes. 

Andrea was probably the most grateful. Not only for the food and medicine but for the fact the boy had grabbed so much womens clothing from closets. Not many people would have thought to do so. There were jeans, blouses, shoes, socks, underwear, and so many button ups. Which didn’t surprise her given those were all Daryl ever wore. She instantly squealed when she picked up one shirt and it was a fancy lightweight white button up in her size. It was perfect, comfortable and clean . She put it on her and Amy’s pile on the chairs that were set up around the fire pit. 

Everyone was picking through, and organizing. Dale and T-dog were going through the medication. And such. Daryl and Sophia just grabbed whatever looked like medicine. There was toothpaste, Tumz, pepto bismol, condoms, pregnancy tests, and a surprising amount of roll on arthritis medications and muscle relaxers. But there were also dozens of bottles of prescription medications and so much useful over the counter meds. Rick and Shane went through the weapons. There were guns, hunting knives, boxes of ammo, arrows, and a big pile of pocket knives. 

Shane had to laugh because… The little bastard really just risked his life to go gather all of this up for the whole group? Fucking insane. 

There were so many shoes that everyone just looked for their size. Glenn ended up with two pairs, boots and sneakers, Rick and Shane and Dale all wore similar sizes so they piled those together, Andrea found knee high muck boots and a pair nice shiny new red combat boots, Amy found some mens hiking boots, Lori found a few pairs in her size and piled them to her side, T-dog was over the moon over the amount of fresh soles and immediately took his old shoes off and slipped on a pair of new sneakers. 

They put everything in collective piles in the wagons to consolidate. They would stay two more nights here before trying to find somewhere else to stay. Moving was safer than staying. When Daryl and Carol walked out everyone was happy with Daryl, clapping him on the back and telling him he did a good job. 

“Where’d you put my cake mix? I wanna cake.” Daryl asked Shane when he could find the red box. Shane flipped it over to the boy with a tight grin. 

“‘Course you want a cake. Tell Carol to find the ingredients. Should be oil and eggs probably.” Shane said Daryl nodded and walked back to Carol. 

“Gotta box of stuff with a picture on it. Look, yellow.” Daryl said and ran his finger under the word. Sure Sophia had told him and he remembered but he knew what ‘yellow’ looked like. Carol smiled and flipped the box over, water, oil, and an egg. Easy enough to figure out. 

“Alright Mister Smarty Pants, did you bring me a cake pan?” Carol asked and Daryl ran back to bring the “baking” tools he’d brought. It was a brownie pan, a spatula, a blue pyrex bowl, and a bag of powdered sugar. At least it could be a frosted cake. 

That night as everyone ate spaghetti, real spaghetti with some squirrel meatballs, all the kids were burning with excitement. Even Daryl who ate quickly, even after Carol told him to eat quieter and neater. Daryl usually ate rather…. In an unsightly manner. He always has stuff on his face and hands and harks down his food like a starved dog. But when he was done he went and stood in the kitchen, alone. 

He stared down at the pan. Yellow cake, a little burn and a little raw in the middle, with powdered sugar and water frosting. It was his. It was for him. It wasn’t for someone else and he just got a piece. It was made special for him. It was all his. He just stepped right up to it and stared down at it. He could eat it. It was his, he could eat all of it. He reached up to just touch it…

“Daryl~ Let’s cut up that cake buddy. You get the best piece, whatever piece you want.” Carol said in a happy sing-songy voice as she walked up behind Daryl who pulled his hand away and backed away from the offensive dessert. He looked like he was caught with his face in a pie, Carol just waved her hand and pulled up a kitchen knife to cut the cake. 

“We all think about stuff like that. Just pick your piece and I’ll cut it up for everyone else.” Carol said safely and Daryl nodded, his face still red. He pointed to the middle where the edges weren’t burnt and Carol cut it and put it on a paper plate. 

“I’m gonna be seventeen next year. Can I have a cake for my birthday? Never had one before.” Daryl said quietly as he looked at the cake. Carol patted his back and they looked at each other. 

“Of course. We’ll find some sprinkles and put back special for it.” Carol said and she loved the way the boy broke out in a big smile, his teeth showing and his eyes scrinching closed. 

Tomorrow she could look for something nice for him. Maybe a candy jar or something to fidget with. Some coloring books. She just couldn’t help but love him, he was so kind and cute and caring and independent and strong. She just wanted to let him be weak, let him be vulnerable just a little bit.