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#im doin everything i can i cant do that etc etc
muirneach · 2 years
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DOG DAY AFTERNOON - AUGUST 22, 1972
to my mother, i ask forgiveness. you don’t understand the things i said and did. but i’m me, and i’m different.
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pumpkzsafeplace · 5 months
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hai again pumpkinnn I haven’t said anythin here in a while,, hope irs ok to vent a lil..
I’m kinda nervous rn becuz I gots school in the mornin and there’s a new policy… no phones or earbuds :( I got bad misophonia n need my music to block out trigger sounds (sniffling, chewing, heavy breathin etc) and im still able to hear tha teacher over it!!! But w/out music and havin to hear em aggravates and overwhelms me n it’s not normal n I do some bad stuffs cuz my body has a physical reaction to it I cant control :( I hav to kick my desk but sometimes it gets too bad n I does some bad stuffs to myself cuz I cant take it out on anythin else :((( plus my partner is online and usually abt the time rhey goes to bed but sometimes nighttime is scary for them wnd talking to em helps em feel ok but now I cant twlk and what if somehtin bad happens??? Hopin to talk to my therapist after school bc i gots appointment after school and get a plan for earbuds but that won’t solve the texting thing bc rheyre just gonna assume im messin around on social media or somethin bc all the bad kids use ir…. Jus bc some kids r bad dont mean we all gots to get punished bc i gots good grades and do my work unlike them…. :(
Anywyas sorry for rambling sm I hope ur doin alright pumpkin and have a good day/night!!!
-🐈‍⬛
- hihi cupcake'! <3 ⭐
i'm okay sweetpea, thank u for asking!! <3
oh no honey i'm sorry :<
things like that happened to me a lot in school too, sadly the school sees students as a whole class and not just individuals :(
maybe you could come up with a keyword system with your partner?
like they type certain keywords to let you know everythings okay, so that way it's short and sweet & you can know what's going on with a simple glance.
you could also work on like personalised playlists they can watch when they're having one of those icky nights? so it could feel like they're watching it with you even though you're working in school?
^^ just some ideas that could possible help a lil <3
-ˏˋ 🍓 ˎˊ˗
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redswaberkez · 8 months
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NOW CAN I HEAR UR HCS FOR P1 AND P2? >:)
NHGRRRR STRAINIG MY BRAIN our hcs also kinda same buutt anywayyyyy
there is kindaa a longread sooo
P1
- Among all dudes only P1 and sch.. sc.. SHTOPOR were at war (p1) or served in the army (shtopor (airbone)) - has sufficient paramedical skills due to military service - his hobbies are playing guitar and singing. Punk-like singing. Grunge-like singing. Not even singing, I would say SCREAMING - he doesnt understand almost all jokes. And if hes trying to make a joke probably its gonna be dark as hell\unfunny\scary\obscure or dad puns*tm (rare) - "You cant sleep now. Monsters are nearby" - can speak german - "Demonic voice wont shut the fuck up. Please help me." - P1 is very diff in comparison to other dudes. He is so serious. He is the one at party who stays in the corner (meme ref they dont know that [...]) - scary mask amd skary voice is only a cover. Deeply inside he is very gentle and caring. But nobody knows this. - He IS an antihorny. He HATES nudity - my todays dream is revealed that he has Cain (like cain and abel ykno) vibes. Im not joking. It was in my dream. and Im gonna stick to it. I DONT KNOW BIBLE THO!!!!!!!!! my mom just once mentioned cain yesterday AND HERE WE GO - he struggles with religion SO MUCH. (im not gonna explain it rn. im doin a fcking comic on it) - Hes always on the verge of a mental breakdown. But he perfer to not think abt it and go VIOLENT that let his true emotions out - migraine survivor - imo he is a cleany one, and his own hygiene is GOOD, altho he doesnt use hairbrush that often. - "Gifted but lazy kid" in the past. "Academic perfomance flew off. You need to show him to a doc. He Could If He Wanted To." - p1 doesnt smoke or drink. He actually doesnt do all these unhealty stuff - oh GOD LORD am NOT your STRONGEST SOLDIER😭
P2
- Can you gib me an ibuprofen. My head are exploding rn (literally) - homophobic bisexual - lit had married his wife cuz he didnt know his bi and thats the reason why their marriage is SHIT - postal dudess (i dont like word doe :/) is his younger sister - he would kill for her and she would kill for him. I love them sm. - also has struggles with religion, but less intense than p1, p2 actually solved them later (gonn explain it laterrrr) - his organism is a fucking garbage but somehow his addictions doesnt damage him that much. - stinky rat. Shower? more like shower of deodorant AHAHSHAH - Hes always perked up, always joking and funny and unfunny, horny, shit, sarcastic etc jokes. - His language is Sarcasm - "im gonna кмs in front of them just to switch trajectory of their lives LMAOOOOO" - Also Lazy Gifted kid*tm - "Evil as weekend entertainment)" - Would like to play drums - p2, p3 and shtopor would drink together - His sunglasses is his trademark, he doesn't go anywhere without his sunglasses. - AND OF COURSE he has his own OPINIONS ON EVERYTHING. Even if hes wrong. He is stubborn as fuck. You can't argue with him. - He can sleep literally anywhere. Even in a ditch (he did). And you cant woke him up. - The three S bingo*tm - stupid sadistic and suicidal - Jack of all trades, master of none - He is very private, when it comes to touch, altho he has a touch starvation - therefore ^ his love language is touch and tactile connection
Idk for now thst all 😖
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spidrstar · 11 months
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STARS RULES
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GENERAL RULES
★彡 Welcome to my rulebook my loves!! <3
★彡 Im still getting the hang of tumblr, just keep that in mind 🥲
★彡 When I say i’m gonna upload a certain day and i don’t sometimes please don’t get upset, it’s a thing i do where i make a schedule and don’t end up following it (it’s really not my fault, shit happens bare with me😔)
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REQUEST RULES
★彡 I’m always open to requests!! I tend to run out of ideas quickly, you’ll know when they’re closed when i say so in my ask box :)
★彡 I will write for - miles morales (e!42) and miles morales (e!1610)
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WONT WRITE
★彡 ‘character’ x ‘character’ aka ships, to me personally they’re boring and if i think that when i read them i wouldn’t be able to write them ‘reader’ x ‘character’ only sorry!!
★彡 NSFW (i feel so weird and uncomfy when writing shit like.. ‘his cock went in and out of her pussy🤓’ i’m sorry i physically cant ..) NO OFFENSE TO THOSE WHO WRITE LIKE THIS!! i have no issue reading them it’s just when it comes to writing i have.. a problem. The farthest i can go is dick and that’s it. 😭
★彡 ‘male reader’ x ‘character’ Im a female and do not know shit about being a male (obvi..) so won’t be doin any of that sorry!!
★彡 Anything that has to do with rape, abuse, racism or homophobia.
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WILL WRITE
★彡 Female reader
★彡 I can try my best to do gender neutral
★彡 I know i said no smut/NSFW, but there will be suggestive content so dw i got y’all😉
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DOS
★彡 Give me your honest opinions!! Please give feedback and criticism if you have it, tell me what you think about my work or anything that could help me improve my writing.
★彡 Be patient. I work hard on everything I write and usually i take my time to make sure it comes out great for you guys to read + I have to make sure I, myself, am satisfied with what I wrote; (brainstorming ideas/adding more interesting things/plot twists etc.)
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DONTS
★彡 Don’t rush me!! ESPECIALLY if you request something. I’ll get to it when I get to it. If you want high quality work you gotta wait, and if you don’t wanna then get off my page 🤷‍♀️ And again, when I post things like “i’ll have this up by (set date)“ please don’t believe me most of those times.. I usually have things going on I won’t know about until then and will have to pause on my writing so it’ll come out later than usual.
★彡 DOOOO NOTTTT STEALLL MYYY WORKK!!!!!! I literally stay up til like 11 am writing some of these and i put so much effort, and it’s definitely not for people to just go and steal/repost/claim my work. If you ever get inspired, just give credit.
★彡 Send hate, give harsh/mean opinions that are not needed, death threats etc. I will either ignore them or come right back at you with the same energy.❤️
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That’s all!! These will change whenever i feel like changing them, because it’s my rulebook ;3 If you cannot follow any of the things listed please DNI. G’Bye!!
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gayspock · 1 year
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🤨? bsg
like i feel like im getting more + more frustrated... bc whilst i am measuring my own expectations, and furthermore i dont EXPECT a show to align fully with my own perspectives, tht can only go so far like... i feel like everything rn is just confused about exactly what the hell theyre trying to explore here + theyre just doin whatever the fuck
like it feels directionless but not intentionally so. which it COULD be given what theyve done but i just.. god idk man. i feel like theres just so many good CONCEPTS that are floated in this show and theres tensions but so few get fully developed and more and more of the time its getting all over the place. and so theres these epic points of convergence - wherein they have done the legwork, and they know wtf is up - where the show is REALLYYY freaking good as all the disparate parts come together.... but as it goes on and theyre getting more and more infrequent and im like ok... like
like again going back to what i said abt whastever the fuck. like again i think so much of it is the lack of respect the show has for the civvies + the cylons. it put a lot of work into the fleet itself and the subtlies within it but everyone else gets half arsed or patronised and its insane, and so when you wanna incorporate those essential elements back in everything is sloppyyyyyyy.
like absolutely NOTHING!!!!!1 NOTHING!!!! on the civilian side is unreasonable but the show is so desperate sometimes to prove that it is. its so funny. and you can absolutely do a nuanced take on it- and they have done really good examples before, or have gotten close to it. bc so true sometimes what the "majority" wants isnt always best, and is swayed very much by emotion - and thats GREAT you can do a lot of commentary there on the politics of that. like i think whilst it was imperfect, gaius' election arc is a good example bc yes he won by doing exactly that, and, i think the reason why i like that arc was bc it was the emphasis on gaius being manipulative rather than everyone being stupid and unreasonable (even though there was some of that i mean the "blame" was on him). BUT you still have to concede and you cant just..... rig a fucking election and take away ppls choice, force them to do whatever the fuck you want because yes. that is authoritarianism and like OTHER EPISODES like dirty hands show very well that these grand sweeping choices made by the president/military have such ill-effects on the everyday ppl that they dont even care about or see AND ITS LIKE YEAH THAT
BUT THEN ITS LIKE. RN. IS IT FUCKING AT ALL RIDICULOUS THAT PPL WOULD WANT TO OVERTHROW ROSLIN AND ADAMA? REALLY? like- its always ZAREK again bc hes depicted as some slimy extremist, and dont get me wrong i dont doubt sure he could have some ulterior motive, but he is a construct, he was written in that way, etc. so its just like.... SO TELLING that hes the villain when literally everything he WANTS is a) reasonable but also b) against the status quo established like... HE ISNT FUCKING WRONG. HE WASNT BEFORE, EITHER!!!! like roslin is not fit to be president from an objective pov. even if her visions are ultimately "correct" at this point in the show fucking... SEE HOW THAT LOOKS TO LITERALLY EVERYBODY ELSE IN THE HUMAN RACE. THEM STRONGARMING EVERYBODY INTO THEIR OWN DECISIONS, REPEATEDLY REFUSING TO LISTEN TO ANY OF "THE PEOPLE" TO DO WHAT THEY THINK IS RIGHT AND LEVERAGING THE MILITARY, ETC. TO GET THAT... LIKE HUH AND HEY ?
AND THATS THE THING THAT MAKES IT FRUSTRATING ALL THE MORE BC. this would be such a good fucking plot if they COMMITTED TO IT properly and just had more fucking teeth about it. quit fucking presenting zarek as some cartoonish slimeball; put more fucking criticism ONTO adama and roslin. stop saying "oh adama is so anti-authoritarian" and fucking put your pussy into showing that or showing his actual internal struggle with it. like for REAL for real- something that lasts more than 2 seconds. quit being so all over the place and FOCUS.
AND WHILE YOURE AT IT OH MY GOD IM SOMAD ABOUT EVERYTHING THEYVE DONE WITH THE CYLONS AT THIS POINT. LIKE IM NOT. because its as equally half arsed at this point and its just so... NOTHINGGGG .... you kept HALF ARSING the cylons before and i thought it was just mystery and intrigue but you girlies just clearly dont care enough and now ugh fuckiNG GOD its so flimsy bc ... its not my favourite route, but i am okay-ish if you did wanna try the fucking attempt at using them to be like ohoh arbitrary differences keeping us divided shtick and do the whole ah yes minority allergory thing from hereon if its done right but youve been so fucking LAZY with them and so im just feeling. my hackles every time you try some shit th- WHATEEVERRRR RANT OVERRRR IM TIRED TODAY WE ARENT DOING TI
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yellow-stars · 2 years
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honest opinion
112 and Queen would get along.
Chander: tf you doin?
112: she promised me whatever I wanted 👉👈
Queen: true. All she wants is a cake
Chandler: dam well she’s your problem 😁
later
Dark: so you left. 112. In a whole new world?
Chandler: sure she can take care of herself
112 bursting through the door: I CAN’T TAKE CARE OF MYSELF :(((
hol on you gave me an idea, but not an idea related to this au.
chandler somehow has the ability to travel trough all the AUs. when they get sick of everyones bs and need a break? *vine boom sound* theyre now theyre in, idk, batim, sitting at a desk and drawing away. maybe they need even more space, and BOOM. end cottage in the mc au.
wouldnt it be really fucked all the chandlers from all the aus, were in fact, just this one fucking guy. villian au = minecraft au = monster au etc etc
maybe they got this ability from the ISWM crystal, which canonically TPs you trough UNIVERSES.
what if every once in a while, idk, dark wakes up in the morning and chandlers gone again, and hes gotta track them down trough like 8540964 aus. sometimes they come back in like 2 days, sometimes theyre missing for 2 months.
and every time, their body changes/adapts to said au. a magical girl transformation happens every time they go to the villian au, their body stretches and morphs when going to the minecraft au, you get the gist of it
---
would make some strange situations. what if one day in the minecraft au, chandler appears after being gone for MONTHS with a brand new bullet scar and a chipped horn, absolutely high on an adrenaline rush. blabbering shit like "oh sweet JESUS that was INCREDIBLE! HA! oh my heavens the looks on their FACES!!".... they just got back from villians au, if it isnt clear.
the villagers are staring from a far, trying to get actors attention or smth so he can go deal with them. theyre also all confused as to what this ''jesus'' is (im sorry i had to make that joke)
chandler finally composes themselves, realizes they accidentally ended up in a field near actors kingdom/town. *WOOSH* theyre gone in a swirl of particles, right as actor was going to check on them. (you cant tell me actor doesnt ADORE the mc AU. literally being worshipped. spends probably 99% of time here)
from a nearby nether portal, dark appears and is frantically looking around while muttering things like "that idiot was supposed to stay in the hospital" and "why did i marry a goddamn clown"
he makes eye contact with actor, who just shakes his head and tells him that he just missed said idiot who was supposed to stay behind on a mission
---
imagine if one day, somehow mark and mack get pulled along from iswm/canon into, lets say elemental au. chandler didnt notice they were behind them, and spooked them into accidental dimensional travel. bringing the 2 of them along.
from their pov, they just see their captain, tinkering with something (the crystal, probs) and the moment mark reaches to wrap his hand around their shoulder, everything changes in an instant.
they now see a beast towering over them, wildly looking around to see if anyones nearby, before deciding its safe. it borderline *snarls* at them before asking what the FUCK did they do.
finally the 2 of them take in their surroundings, noting theyre at, what seems to be, a temporary campsite late at night. theres more moons in the sky than there should be-
"MACK AND MARK FOCUS," well that worked, they both have locked eyes with this creature "okay finally. give me a moment and DONT. MOVE."
they pick up some device off the ground, clamp their claws on the mens shoulders and.. theyre back on the bridge of the ship? and instead of some otherworldy beast grasping their shoulders, its the captain.
"don't ask. you dont want to know."
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lizandbo · 3 years
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Taking care of your little sibling w/ bnha bois
im keeping the little siblings gn:) and theyre like 5-8 years old let’s say
shoto
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- i feel like everyone says this when there writing about this for shoto but he’a the babyyyy ofc he don’t really know what he’s doin
- i mean obviously he doesn’t wanna do what his dad did to him
- so he’s so patient and sweet
- if your brother/ sister makes a mess he’ll help clean it up and reassure everything things alright to the kid
- if your little sibling is energetic he’ll try to cope with it
- if you make him stay with your baby sib while you go to the store or sum he’ll try not to have a panic attack
- he doesn’t like to feel that hes taking responsibility while your gone, too much pressure
- tries to make the kid be in one place
- like one particular room so they don’t get hurt or make a mess etc
- if/when they cry he’ll die inside
- doesn’t matter if it’s his fault or not idk how it could be
- he feels suppperrr guilty
- he just wants to hide into a hermit crab shell and slowly disappear becuase he doesn’t want to make a bad impression
- this sounds more like amajiki but ok
- buys at least two toys for the bub
- would barely touch them
- he doesn’t want to make them cry (again)
- makes very not so tasty food for the child
- kk look he ain’t no cook so give him some credit
- tries to play whatever they want to play but has kinda of a hard time
- also he’s very blunt and no playful at times so like the child would be like:
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- he just wants himself to be on their good side if he can
- would be so grateful when they don’t hate them and asks y’all when they’re gonna see shoto again
Deku
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- ok I’m sorry but I think he jus looks so fuckin cute rn
- his heart would go through the mcfucking roof
- he’s good with kids yk but like… it’s your sibling so like he kinda very nervous
- would be affectionate with your lil bro/ sis
- will show his all might collection
- if your sibling like all might they will go on and on till your ears bleed about all might
- if the kid is jumping on the walls izuku will be kinda surprised when the kid acts all hyper
- he’ll be hyper with them too:)
- he will take them to a park and something and play something fun
- if it’s like a ‘contest’ like racing or sum he will let them win half the time
- he will play hide and seek too and be acting super dumb when ‘he cant find them’
- hell lowkey nap with yo sibling if they like to take naps
- bby is tired from all the training so ofc he’s gon take a nap withem
- will style the hair if he can, he loves spending time with any of your family as long as they treat you right because He won’t like it when they do treat you like shit
- But he feels closer to you when he does discover what’s your family like
- makes good enough food for the child/ren
- whenever they cry if they do he will be so empathetic towards them
- he just wishes that they’re gonnna have a good life
- will kinda be a bit pissed when they are like really really really snarky
- all in all hes really good to them:D
- “your younger siblings are so cute! I want to see them again 100%”
shoji
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- bby would be so scared
- like he does NOT want this lil punk to yank his mask down
- insecurity up high
- “why am I feeling this way? It’s just meeting your younger sibling”
- ”well yeah no shit your gonna be nervous for the first time“
- if your sibling loves him he will love them
- he’ll feel so relieved
- when he first met them he was kinda having a staring contest but he then realized that he shouldn’t be looking for too long since he might scare the kid
- but nah yo sister or brother is finneee and danddyyy
- will play with them as long as they want
- at the end of the day I feel like your sibling is gonna be
passed out
- if your sibling is sad he’ll try to help so much
- another hair player
- is your sibling request something he may or may not know how to do but do it anyways
- doesn’t really say no to them
- unless it will hurt them ofc
- will bring them popcorn and a movie
- you being jealous in the background
- his guard is always up becuase he doesn’t want them getting hurt
- for his sake and your sake and the little monsters sake becuase he doesn’t want to have a bad impression (like shoto)
- will panic so hard when they cry (if they do)
- bby just wants some quiet but when they aren’t he’s in for a treat:D
- he plays boardgames with them too if you have some
- ok chef shoji right here
- will love his food becuase he magically knows what’s his favorite dish
- if The kid wants some affection or jumps on top of him he will be so fucking careful holy fucking shit
- but he won’t mind tho
- he would be a really good dad tbh
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shigarakislittlepet · 3 years
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im so happy to find a blog with good nsfw content for literally all my faves lol we share the same braincell it seems! how about fluffy nsfw headcanons for Dabi, Shigi, Aizawa and Shinsou and well, Baku but I don't want to overwhelm you even if you don't have a character limit hhh, with a s/o that was completely inexperienced in sex before they got together? They grew more comfortable with the idea of sex over time as they used to be really shy about it but they're scared they'll mess up and disappoint their loves? If possible could you mention what kind of approach each boy would have for the first time with their virgin s/o? I'm just feeling some fluffy dick tonite ya know lol stay safe out there <3
Ohhhh my gosh, this whole thing gave me brain rot lmao, thank you for giving me this power <3<3<3
This also took me literal months to finish because life got crazy, so I’m sorry about that. Hope you enjoy it anyway!
TW: loss of virginity, gentelness, fluffy smut, unprotected sex bc I’m a whore (Y/N is on birth control), and as always all characters are adults especially Y/N
-Dabi-
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> You are surprised by how patient he is with you. You were sure he’d have gotten tired of waiting, but he didn’t push. He didn’t make you feel badly about it, and the last thing he would ever want to do to sweet little innocent angel is coerce them into something they weren’t ready for. So, he waits.
> It happened so gradually. Over time, light kissing became making out. After a few months, you got more comfortable and it didn’t feel at all odd to fall into bed with him, cuddling and “swapping spit” as he called it, which always made you giggle like a schoolgirl at his crudeness. His hands would test the waters, but he was always feeling for nervous tremors and flinching, never wanting to go further than you were comfortable. At first, he only rested a hand on you lower back, drawing lazy circles into your waist, his other cradling your face gently, reassuringly. Eventually he could get his hand beneath your shirt, still just at your lower back, but he was content with his progress. Your skin was soft and you said he felt warm, and that was the first time he ever thought of his quirk as “sweet, comforting”, as you described the warmth from his hands.
> After a few months went by, he had progressed to the point of being able to freely roam your body with his hands, the warmth helping you stay calm and anchored to him.
> What continued to surprise you is how easy it felt, once you were ready. You didn’t even see it coming. He asked you, so gently, if he could take your shirt off. You told him he could as long as he promised to keep you warm. He went along slowly, constantly reassuring you, “God Angel, you’re so beautiful. I gotta see more of you, can I? Please?”, “You’re so soft, I need to feel more of your skin, angel, please?” You didn’t even hesitate, you didn’t need to. You felt safer with him than you ever had in your life.
> You realized, once you were both naked together, just how comfortable you were with him. And suddenly you felt like you needed to give him everything he ever wanted, and you knew he would do the same for you.
> It happens so slowly, or at least, it feels like it does. His hand slowly grazes down between your bodies until he reaches your core. You gasp, no one but you had ever touched you there, and it feels so foreign and wonderful. And warm. Once you begin bucking onto his fingers, an insatiable grin stretches across his face. He retracts his fingers, bringing them to his lips, and you watch as he sucks them clean. He calls you delicious and rolls on top of you, asks you if you’re ready for him. For the first time, you look down between your bodies and see just how huge and hard he is for you. When he sees your concern he kisses your forehead, then your lips. “I won’t hurt you Angel, I promise.” You nod and smile, and he starts easing into you, stopping every so often when he can tell the stretch is too much. He kisses your cheeks, your shoulders, your lips, whatever he can get his mouth on as he pants and mumbles little praises. “I love you”, “You’re doin’ so well”, “You’re takin’ me sooo well”, “God, you’re so beautiful, you know how beautiful you are Angel?”, “Ahh, you’re so fuckin’ tight and wet for me Angel, you want me that badly?”. The praises and teases help you considerably to keep you relaxed, and fuck, you DO want him. So fucking badly, you need him. When he’s finally seated inside you fully, he waits, clearly using every last bit of his restraint and self control to give you time to adjust. When you finally whine and buck your hips up on him, he loses it. “I hope you’re fuckin’ ready, Angel.”
>You find rather quickly that Dabi’s style is a beautiful mix of “fucking” and “making love”. He fucks you, hard and deep, so much so that it makes you see stars, but while he does it he’s caging you in-between his arms, holding you close while he pistons in and out of you. He looks you in the eyes, watching your reactions, quickly finding what angle makes you convulse and let out those beautiful moans and coos that he’s now desperate to hear.
>When he nears his end, he reaches down between you again to rub sweet circles against your clit, because no way is Dabi cumming first. It’s just not his style.
-Shigaraki-
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>BRAIN ROT
> Shigaraki is definitely happy that you’re inexperienced, he’d kill anyone who had ever laid a hand on you before him. You belonged to him.
> It also means that you’re a virgin, which really gets him going because hes a pervert. ((He’s also secretly glad that he’s not the only virgin))
> He is touch starvvveeeeddddddd. We all know this. But at first, he’s so hesitant to touch you, for fear of destroying you.
> You are patient with each other, and together you find out what works and what doesn’t. He got some artist gloves so he could hold your fucking hand without hyperventilating about dusting you. He’s still afraid of you disappearing beneath his fingertips.
> You were never, not even for a second, worried that he would hurt you. You knew that he could, that he had the ability, but you knew that he wouldn’t.
> He wasn’t so sure, he was afraid of rolling over in the night and finding a pile of dust where you used to be. He wakes up from nightmares about it and has to wake you up to hold you while he shakes uncontrollably. He just has to know you’re alive.
> You both get more and more comfortable with physical proximity and contact together, because you both wanted it, you were both just so worried about fucking everything up.
> When the time came where both of you decided you were ready to have sex, you admitted to him that you were afraid of not measuring up to his expectations. All these “what if’s” kept popping up in your mind: “what if he doesn’t find my body attractive enough”, “what if I don’t know how to move right”, “what if I cant please him”, etc. etc. etc.
> He just looks at you kind of taken aback and confused. He was worried about you not being able to see him as sexually attractive because of how he looked, he was just as self-conscious as you. “Darling, you’re the most perfect person in existence, how can you not see that? Look at me! I’m... I... Look like this! How could I ever hope that someone as beautiful as you could ever see me that way?”
>You didn’t immediately know how to respond. You were... heartbroken that he saw himself that way. You couldn’t image him being self-conscious about anything because in your eyes, he was a god. He was perfect and angelic and you told him as much. You looked at him with such adorably big eyes and your voice was full of so much honesty and adoration, he had to have you immediately. He’d never felt desired, he had never felt lovable. He always thought it would be a miracle if anyone would ever be able to even stomach looking at him without cringing away in disgust. But you were so perfect and you loved him so immediately and so much that it knocked him out. He launches himself at you and just kisses you for a while.
> You both fumbled around a bit at first, trying to find what felt best. You both quickly came to the conclusion that you were going to have to practice together. A lot. As much as possible actually, because even in your inexperience, you both felt more amazing than you ever had in your lives. When you were connected like this, panting, kissing, licking, trying your damndest to become one being, it felt like bliss. You never wanted it to stop.
-Aizawa-
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> MORE FUCKING BRAIN ROT
> Aizawa has an innocence kink. There I fucking said it.
> When it comes to the person he’s with, he’s a shameless flirt, and while he would NEVER cross a line or pressure you, he definitely does his best to get you in the mood whenever he can, much to your naïve frustration.
> At first you genuinely don’t even realize he’s doing it on purpose. The heated looks he gave you that made your knees weak? You didn’t think he was doing that on purpose, it’s just because he’s... tired? And he always looks so gorgeous, so that’s why. He ALWAYS makes your knees weak. Yeah that’s all it is, obviously.
> And when he comes up behind you, hands on your hips gently, and lowly rumbling in your ear. Sometimes it’s just comments about whatever you’re doing, which was bad enough. But sometimes it was mumbled compliments. About your outfit, how good it made your ass look. About how soft your hair was, how good you smelled, the softness of your skin while he gently rubbed his stubble against your neck.
>YOU COULDN’T FUCKING HANDLE IT.
> He was so soft most of the time, cuddling you while watching movies, cooking together, dancing in the kitchen with you at 3 in the morning after he finished grading papers. The shift that happened when he would get flirtatious was dizzying.
> You were nervous though, Aizawa was a bit older than you, and obviously way more experienced that you. One night while you were curled up in bed together, you told him you were nervous about disappointing him when the time finally came. He sat up and turned a light on immediately and pulled you into his lap. He held you and stroked your hair and told you how much you meant to him, how you could never disappoint him, how much he wanted you, and how he was willing to wait however long you needed. He held you until he was sure you felt better about it, and then he held you until he was sure you were asleep. You were the most important person in the world to him, and he wasn’t gonna let you think anything was ever gonna change that.
> When you finally got tired of his teasing and felt like you were ready, you decided to get him back. Before he got home, you put on one of his long shirts as a dress and started getting dinner ready.
> When he walked through the door and saw that you were wearing nothing but one of his black button ups, he had to maintain every ounce of his self control to contain the rush of feral need that suddenly consumed him. Now it was HIS turn to assume you were being innocent. And man did you play it up. “What’s wrong Shota? Are you feeling okay?” And you bat your big beautiful eyes at him. He was going to have a stroke.
> It wasn’t until you bent over and he noticed you weren’t wearing anything under his shirt that he realized it was an invitation. He came up behind you, caging you in against the counter, and growled lowly in your ear, “Do you have any idea what you’re doing to me?” He gently pushed his growing erection against your ass, making you gasp. Score.
> “W-what do you mean?” you looked up at him as innocently as you could. He took your hand and pressed it to the front of his pants. He groaned low in his chest, thankful for any friction. “Don’t play dumb with me, kitten. You know exactly what you’re doing. I think you should take responsibility.” You grinned.
> “Yes Sir,” he jolts at that, and you sink your knees and get to work undoing the fastenings on his hero costume. When his cock springs free, you eagerly give it kitten licks until he’s had enough. He grips you by your hair and gently guides your mouth down onto his cock. He’s big, bigger than you can take, but that doesn’t stop Aizawa from purposefully making you gag on him every so often. He really does get off on how innocent you are, the tears that hang in your eyes from gagging on his cock. He’s gonna cum soon if he’s not careful.
> After he’s had his fun making you suck him off, he pulls you up and carries you off to bed. No way he’s taking your virginity on the floor, he’s too much of a gentleman. And dinner, what dinner? Thank god nothing happened to be on the stove or in the oven.
> He sets you down in bed and kisses you, takes his shirt off of you and finishes ridding himself of his hero costume. He takes pride in getting you ready for him, relishing in your sweet noises and how wet you are for him. A fact that he teases you about. “S-Shotaaa~” you moan and clench down on his fingers. He smirks, “What happened to ‘Sir’, hmm? I liked that, you know...” All you can do is whine up at him in response.
> When you feel like you’re close to cumming, you whine louder and clench down harder and before you can reach your peak, he stops. You whine in frustration before he leans down and rumbles, “Oh no, kitten, the only way you’re cumming is if you cum on my cock.” You gasp and nearly convulse at his filthy words, but you’ve never felt like you needed him more.
> He fucks you gently, at first anyway. For as long as he can. He rolls his hips into you and angles his thrusts expertly, aiming for that spot inside you that’ll make your head spin. And he hits it. Every time. And your head DOES spin. And soon you can feel the pressure build again and you start whining again, “Sh-Shouta, please! I’m s-oh! So close!” He smiles, and decides to take pity on you. He pistons harder, faster, brings a hand to your core to rub circles against your clit and when you cum, you scream his name and he can’t take it anymore. He slams into you, chasing his own high and simultaneously extends yours. You’re seeing stars by the time he cums deep into you. He rolls over, bringing you with him. You lie on top of him and he strokes your hair, and you just hold each other for a while.
-Shinso-
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> I wanna say this now, Shinso is Aizawa Jr. I’m so sorry, but its true. They’re both tired, overworked, cat lovers that just wanna come home and cuddle and pass out.
> He knows he’s your first boyfriend. You met at UA and pretty much bonded immediately. Now that you’re both pro-heros working for the same agency? It was only a matter of time before he made a move. And thank whatever higher power exists that you have the same schedule. More time for cuddles.
> HOWEVER! Don’t let the fact that he’s a cuddle-bug fool you. He frequently has to remember that you’re a virgin and you’ve never been in a relationship before, so you have no idea how much he’s affected by you answering your door on a Saturday morning you both had off wearing one of his hoodies that absolutely swallows you. Looking up at him smiling and yawning sleepily, rubbing one of your eyes and groggily asking, “What are you doing here so early? I thought we weren’t going out till tonight?”. He has to breathe deeply to stop himself from jumping you.
> Because much like Aizawa, seeing you so sleepy and soft and small and knowing how innocent and naive you are to all of the things you do that make him need you... is going to make him lose his mind. Quickly.
> Instead of an innocence kink though, this motherfucker has a corruption and a mind break kink. He wants to make it impossible for you to feel pleasure without him, he wants to make you need him desperately, forever. And he wants to do it without the help of his quirk. But that would all come in time, at the moment he has to stop himself from cumming in his pants because you’re bending over on your way to your room so you can change, stooping to pet your cat and his hoodie rode up your ass and he can see your lacy black panties and you were GOING to drive him insane long before he ever got the chance to make you his, he was sure.
> He had brought you coffee and suggested you just stay in all day since you both had such a late night. Watching movies and stuff. You know, normal stuff. He told himself he wasn’t going to try and make a move. Right? Right.
> But when you emerged from your room 45 minutes later, showered and changed, your hair still damp and a droplet of water drifting down your neck and landing in the dip of your collar bones, all he could think of was licking it up. How good your hair must smell, how your skin was still probably warm form the water... He was staring, and you pretended not to notice.
> You were nervous about not measuring up to his expectations. You’d seen the women he usually went out with, and how comfortable they were with their bodies and their sexuality. How beautiful they were. As far as you were concerned, you were nothing like them.
> He could see the gears turning in your head and the downturn of your mouth, and he asked you what was wrong. He motioned for you to come sit with him, and it wasn’t five seconds before he pulled you into his lap. After some coaxing, you let him know what you were worried about. He assured you that the reason he was so happy with you is because you weren’t anything like the women he had dated before. Because, not only were you far more beautiful than they were, they had also been conceited and cold, only dating him because he was an up and coming pro-hero that could get them into events so they could dump him for the first bigger hero they’d meet. He liked that you were soft and warm and he could trust you, that you had always trusted him, even despite his quirk.
> You talked for awhile, and as the morning sun drifted higher into the sky, you decided it was time to door dash some food. While he ordered it, you excused yourself the restroom. You needed to think. The heaviness of the conversation still weighed on you, and you’d never felt closer to him than you did now. It was time, you were sure. You wanted to give him everything he’d been waiting so patiently for, he deserved it. And so did you damnit, no more of this scaredy-cat bullshit! You gave yourself your best war face in the mirror before you exited the bathroom and going back to the living room where Shinsou was reclined on your couch. Head tilted back, resting on the pillow behind him.
> He was so beautiful. Lavender hair a wild mess, eyes closed and lashes fluttering softly. You wanted to kiss his neck suddenly, and unlike when urges like this usually happened, you didn’t shove the thought away. You quickly straddled him and, before he had the chance to question you, you began kissing up and down his neck softly. “K-kitty...” he groaned beneath you, gripping your waist, his hips jerking up against yours.
> After a while of your explorative kissing, he growled impatiently and flipped you over easily, pressing you into the couch. He kissed you like he might die if he didn’t, deep and slow and desperate. When he finally broke for air and looked at you, he felt his heart and his dick jump. Your flushed face and your eyes that were looking up at him through your eyelashes heavily, your mouth hanging open gasping and your kiss bitten lips, your brows softly cinched at the effort it took for you to remember you needed to breathe.
> He asks you if you’re sure you were ready, and when you nod dazedly up at him he doesn’t need any more convincing.
> He takes his time, he’s slow and methodical. He wants your first time to be an enjoyable experience. Something you can look back on fondly and remember how much he loved you, how good it felt, how comfortable you were. He wanted it to be better than his first time, drunk after a hero convention, with some woman who didn’t remember his name in the morning and never called him back. He pushed the thought away. He focused on you, on how perfect you were.
> When he finally thrusts into you, you think you want to feel like this forever. You tell him so, and beams with pride, pushing your pleasure further. Kissing your neck and praising you. Telling you how perfect you are, telling you all the things you do that drive him crazy, telling you that he’s never going to let you go, that you’re his forever and he’s yours.
> You cum together, and you think that everything in the world must have always been this beautiful. You spend the rest of the day cuddling, eating, and making love.
-Bakugo-
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> No thoughts in this mans head. None. At least when it comes to romance. When you first start dating, you had to make the first move cause his oblivious ass just thought you were challenging him. You had to explain to him that what you were actually doing was called “flirting”.
> So when it comes to your first time, you know you’re gonna have to make the first move there too. He fears rejection, so he avoids the things he really wants the most. Which in this case is you whining on his dick.
> But he also knows you’re a virgin and he doesn’t wanna scare you, so he leaves it be. Trusting his fist to get the job done when he really needs to let off some steam. Either by punching shit or jerking off.
> One day, you do catch him jerking off, and you immediately start to (stupidly) think that you’re not enough for him, that he might leave you for someone who can give him what he needs. You don’t think he notices you having a mini panic attack in the hallway so you sneak back to the kitchen to catch your breath and think. Why HAD you waited this long? What were you waiting FOR? You guessed you had just been worried about not knowing what to do, about him getting impatient and annoyed with you for your lack of experience.
> Making your final decision, you square your shoulders and march yourself back to your shared room. You confidently open the door to find him ... waiting for you?
> “Tch, took you long enough. You done freakin’ out now?” He grumbles from his spot on the bed. You nod meekly and he opens his arms for you, an invitation you gratefully accept. He pets your head and continues grumbling, “ just as bad as shitty-hair, nobody ever knocks anymore. You shouldn’t be surprised when you just try to walk in like that...”
> He keeps petting your head until eventually you hit him with it. “‘Tsuki, I wanna... uhm...” you look up at him with pleading eyes hoping his quirk somehow suddenly allows him to read your mind.
> It doesn’t. “ You wanna what? C’mon, spit it out.” No thoughts, remember?
> You huff and blush and finally squeak out, “Wanna make you feel good, ‘Tsuki...”
> His brain stops working momentarily. When he catches back up, he smirks. “Seriously? It just took you gettin’ jealous over my left hand for you to be ready?”, he teased. You stick out your tongue and he grabs your jaw, looks you dead in the eyes when he says, “I have something much more important for that cute little mouth to do.”
> Your eyes go wide at his suggestion, even though it really doesn’t surprise you. When Katsuki wants something he wants to go all out, no half-assing it. You nod nervously and he laughs at your apprehension, allowing you to shift down his body until you were face to face with his fly. You undid the button and zipper with shaky hands, and gently guide his dick out of his jeans.
> Beautiful is the first word to come to your mind. Beautiful and massive, just like the rest of him. He was easily over six feet tall, and built too so it really shouldn’t have surprised you, but it did. For a moment all you can do is look up at him from your place below him, your big strong hero. You melt a little and you notice him smirking down at you again, “What ‘ya lookin’ at, princess?”. He gently strokes your cheek while you admire him, “You.” you reply dazedly. His smirk widens to a bear malicious grin, “Me? How come?”. A feeling you’re not totally familiar with, but you’re pretty sure is called submission, fills you suddenly and you feel warm and content. “You’re perfect,” you bat your eyelashes and bite your lip as you gently start to stroke your hand up and down his length.
>He controls his breathing, because he really can’t handle you looking so cute with his cock that close to your pretty little face. “‘Tch, and? What’s got you so worked up about it?” You giggle and nuzzle your face into the base of his cock and look up at him innocently. “I’m just glad I’m yours,” you smile and lick him from base to tip before gently taking him into your mouth. You’d read enough smut online to at least have some idea how to do this.
> He almost cums when you say that you’re glad to be his. His, he grins. He doesn’t get to think about that for too long though because your warm, wet tongue is sliding up his shaft and then your pretty little mouth engulfs him and he thinks he might hyperventilate if you keep looking up at him like that. He’d almost say it wasn’t fair, but then you start moving and he thinks that he could actually die happily from the warm bliss that fills him while he watches you try to take more and more of him down your throat.
> This is much more fun than you thought it would be, especially because Katsuki keeps letting out those little sighs and groans, you’re pretty sure he doesn’t even realize he’s doing it. You hollow out your cheeks and suck a bit harder before taking a deep breath and relaxing your throat as much as possible. You lower yourself down as far as you can, pushing past the ring of muscle in the back of your throat before moving down further. You feel him lay his hand gently, encouragingly, on the back of your head. You’re surprised when you find your nose nestled in the light blonde fuzz at the base of him and you stick your tongue out to lap at the underside.
> He jolts when you begin your descent. You’re not really gonna try to deep-throat him, are you? He watches you, mesmerized. No ones ever even tried, always saying he was way too big. It felt way too good. He laid a hand on the back of your head to ground himself, quickly realizing he had to control himself so that he didn’t clench his fist in your hair or shove you down all the way and hold you there. When you reached your goal, he sighed. Your throat felt perfect wrapped around him, just like he knew it would. When he felt your tongue sneak out of your mouth and lick, he thanked whatever creator there was that your tongue was long enough to reach his anchor. when you start to move your head up and down, he can only take it for so long before he’s thrusting up into your mouth. When you gag on him, that’s it, he has to pull you off him before he grips your head and suffocates you on his cock.
> He’s nearly at the point of begging, but thankfully, mercifully, you seem to get the idea. You wipe your mouth and lie back on the bed, giggling at his abruptness and he growls in response. He kisses you, and praises you, telling you how good you are, how much he needs to be inside you as he undresses you. You’re surprised at how automatically your legs open for him, and you tell him how much you need him inside of you as well. You feel so empty all of a sudden. Until one of his thick fingers finds your molten core and gathers some of your slick before sinking into you and you gasp.
> He continues to kiss and praise you as he works you with his fingers. You whine and moan and beg, it’s like music to his ears. When he thinks you’re ready, he lines himself up with your entrance, sliding up and down, grinding against your clit briefly before continuing. “I wanna hear you beg for it, princess.” and fuck, did you beg. A beautiful litany of filthy fucking words fell from your mouth, and he couldn’t take it anymore. He sinks into you fully in one thrust, gripping your open legs for stability.
> At first you can’t speak, you can’t make any noise at all. You feel so unbelievably full, and you look up at him and his eyes are clenched shut and his jaw is set. He’s holding himself back. He’s trying to be gentle with you because it’s your first time. He really is very sweet when he wants to be. You raise a shaky hand to his face and he leans into it. He met your eyes and you watch as his control falters when he sees you bent in half like this. You smile, “Katsuki, please”, is all you can say. It seems to open the flood gates. For all his self control, he pounds into you mercilessly and it fills you with the most intense feeling of ecstasy. “F-fuck ‘Tsuki, you feel s-so fucking good,” you moan and gasp brokenly.
> He cums hard. Grunting, growling, and near snarling the whole way through. You’re seeing stars, even though you haven’t cum. It had felt so fucking amazing, and you’re more than content with that. Katsuki is definitely not however, and is intent on eating you out until you beg for mercy. He always takes such good care of you.
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mypimpademia · 4 years
Note
can i request a shoto x (black if you can) reader reacting to fanfiction like one of those videos on youtube 👋🙈
Todoroki x black!reader
TW: Swearing, the ending is like sort of suggestive?? Like the fic theyre reading is suggestive
Note: youre a youtuber in this fic. I felt like it'd work better if it was a fanfic about you and Todoroki and not an x reader too. And I felt like this would work better as a one shot instead of a hc which I usually do. Also this is really bad and I apologize bc this is definitely not my best work but I tried- (this was sitting in drafts for like 2 days bc I wanted to find a way to make it better but I still hate it but I hope its not unbearable for yall)
Key: F/n = fan names (the name of your fanbase); italics = whats being said in the fic that you're reacting too; F/f = favorite food
"Hello F/n's, welcome back to another video. As you can see, my amazing boyfriend is here with us again today." You said enthusiastically, hugging Shoto.
He waved at the camera, not knowing what to say. "Me being, I haven't told him what we're finna be doin. So, what do you think we're gonna do?" You asked him.
Shoto looked slightly distressed, because last time you did a whats in the box challenge, and he ended up touching a raw, dead, squid.
"I have no clue, but I'm scared as hell." He said, leaning his head into the palm of his head, while his elbow rested on his knee.
"Don't be, its nothing bad." You reassured him. You received nothing but a look that said 'you sure about that?'.
"We're reacting to fanfiction of ourselves." You told him. "Fanfiction?" Shoto asked.
"Yes." You said, earning another questioning look. "Anyways, let's start before he quits." You said, pulling out your phone.
"Youre reading first, babe." You handed him your phone.
"Chocolate bunny, where are you, baby?" Shoto read, only to pause, and squint at the screen.
"I dont call her that." He said bluntly. "Hes not that corny." You said. "I'm not corny at all." He objected. "You call me Hersheys Kiss, Sho." You corrected in turn. "Yeah, but thats cute, I wouldn't out right call you 'chocolate'." (I'm putting this in because I personally hate when a fic refers to a black reader as 'chocolate' and im doing it twice to be cringy <3)
"'I'm in the kitchen!' Y/n shouted to him." Shoto said, attempting to do a female voice. "Is that how I sound to you??" You asked him, scruncing up your face. "Well, I cant exactly sound like you." He said. "Fine, we'll read our own parts." You offered in compromise.
"'Hey, baby. I know I've been busy with hero work, but since I'm off, lets spend the day together.' Shoto said, wrapping his arms around Y/n's waist." Shoto read enthusiastically, in order to give the story feel. "'That'd be great. And I made you cold soba, eat up.' Y/n told him, placing his bowl on the counter.'"
"That's more accurate." You said, referring to him offering to spend a day at home and giving him cold soba. "Except, I wake up first." Shoto added.
"After eating breakfast, Y/n and Shoto lounged around. Talking about nothing in particular, bouncing around topics like their future, movies, and even local food places." Shoto read, seeming at least slightly interested now.
"'Shoto, you'd probably have catering bring the best cold soba to our wedding, even if its from all the way around the world.'" You stopped to look over at Shoto, you could tell he was genuinely thinking of that idea. "We've actually had this talk, im not sure what he's going to do, but i found a sticky note that included a giant bowl of cold soba." You said, shaking your head.
"Im doing it." Shoto confirmed. "But why..?" You asked him. "Why not?" He asked in response. "Then I'm getting a giant f/f." You told him. He gave you a short shrug, silently compromising.
"'Yeah, but you'd probably let me.'" Shoto smiled at how accurate the story was. "'Whatever. By the way, your favorite China shop is open, how about we go get you another soba bowl?' Y/n suggested, propping her head up on her palms." You read aloud, feeling a tap on your shoulder.
"Can we actually do that after this, baby?" Shoto asked, giving you a specific look that he knew you couldn't say no to. "Sure." You sighed.
"'Yes, please.' Shoto cheered in agreement, getting up to get dressed."
"Now I just know that this is finna be one of those fics where its like, 'Y/n threw her hair up into a messy bun, slipping on a big shirt-'." You predicted, as you skimmed through the text, proving yourself correct.
"Y/n styled her braids in a low ponytail, throwing on a pair of ripped, skinny, blue jeans, and a tank top." You read through slight snorts.
"Shoto put on his usual going out outfit, black jeans, a white shirt, and a light blue jacket." Shoto cringed, eyebrows twitching as he read.
"Do I really wear that specific outfit that much?" He asked. "Yes, Shoto, you do. That's why I always try to get you to change." You told him, rolling your eyes.
"And you just didn't say anything?" Shoto retorted. "Bro, I just-" You paused when he started laughing. "Fuck you." You huffed. "Later." He mouthed.
You blinked, taking everything in for a second. "Bet- but back to the story."
"At the China shop, Shoto had stacks on stacks of expensive soba bowls. Y/n pointed out which ones she thought he'd like, while looking at a few cups and tableware at the same time."
"After buying everything and loading into to the car, Shoto made a suggestion. 'How about we go get you some more clothes, Bunny?' He asked Y/n. 'Sho, you take me clothes shopping every other week.' She replied. 'Yeah, but I like buying you things.' He huffed, with a pout."
"This is exactly, how shopping with him is." You said, shaking your head. "I really do like buying you things. My baby deserves everything, so thats the best I can do." Shoto cooed, wrapping his arms around your waist, and resting his head on your shoulder.
"I love you, Hersheys Kiss." Shoto said, kissing your cheek. "I love you too, IcyHot." You said back.
"'Fine Sho, but only a few things. And we're buying for you too.' Y/n compromised. Shoto smiled, and nodded his head."
"After shopping, Y/n snd Shoto came back with bags from stores like Fashion Nova, Sephora, Bath & Body Works, etc.. After setting their bags down, Shoto fell backwards onto the bed, a sigh leaving his lips."
"'All tired out, Sho?' Y/n asked him, laying on top of him. He nodded, sitting up straight, making sure to keep Y/n on his lap. 'But.. I know something that could wake me up.' Shoto whispered, red painting his face. He pulled out a Victoria's Secret bag from one of the other bags. Y/n was curious as to how he got it, considering that they were together the whole time. But her thoughts were cut short from hearing Shotos voice. 'Put this on for me?'"
"And then it just ends? How did you feel about this, Sho?" You asked, turning to meet his eye. Shoto grumbled, saying something under his breath that you couldn't hear.
"My father told me fans could get like this... but I didn't think I'd ever see it outside of crazed fangirls on the streets." He grunted, a slightly uncomfortable glint in his face.
"You know some go past that, right Sho?" You told him. Shoto narrowed his eyes, giving you a side glance before looking back at the camera.
"Anyways, enough of torturing Sho for this video. Please like, subscribe, and comment, hit the bell to turn on notifications so you can stay tuned. I'll see you next time, bye F/n's." You blew a kiss towards the camera before turning it off.
"Can we go get my soba bowls now?" Shoto asked, wrapping his arms around you, as you checked the cameras files to make sure nothing crashed.
"Yes, and we can get you more clothes." You told him, pecking his cheek. "I dont really wear the same thing that often, do I?" He questioned you, and himself, eyebrows threading together.
"You do, now let's go IcyHot." You ushered him, taking him by the hand.
"If you call me IcyHot again, I will start calling you Chocolate Bunny.
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sailorvinus · 3 years
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What are your thoughts on people who goes all out on the aesthetic for their blogs? Do you think they’re have the right to express their creativity however they want? && Other than roleplaying, what’s your favorite hobby?
✨ @deductry. meme. still accepting!
17. What are your thoughts on people who goes all out on the aesthetic for their blogs? Do you think they’re have the right to express their creativity however they want?
i think its fine as long as aesthetic doesnt hinder the ability to make a reply i can read. some people really do be out here triple spacing their words, adding bold, italics, upside down letters, strikethroughs, underline, and everything else and for what???? for a reply that the kids i used to teach could write. and they were like 4 years old. lol. thats sad....... that’s when i know someone’s not confident in themselves
dont rly understand why ppl trend chase. ive noticed ppl putting dividers in their replies now and im just??? mystified???? what is this... what does it add to the reply.... which if ppl wanna do it then fine but please consider this: my blog is pretty and its bad enough ugly icons that dont match them are ruinin the vibe now mfs wanna add a border that is totally irrelevant to the actual reply???? i.......... im gonna get a divider / border like these 2001 old web ones and then force everyone to look at it on their blog then the concept becomes goofy
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i think id be fine with aesthetics if they didnt involve those chunky dunky ass container themes with super busy backgrounds + 50 textures, the crispiest color psds, promos that all look Exactly alike, navigation that u cant see, 20 x 20 icons the size of a cheerio, 4px text, the shittiest formatting on this side of lady gaga's america, and actually gave some sort of idk. pizzazz to the muse.
like if the aesthetics are important then at least let them tell a story too. and authentic. not something thats bein done cuz everyone else is doin it. id like to think i go balls to the walls with my blog too but you walk into my blog and you know it’s a myspace era throwback because that’s what my muse is supposed to be.
everyone can do whta they want! but if its uglee imma call it dat so......
30. Other than roleplaying, what’s your favorite hobby?
im a musician before im anything else so im probably in my daw fucking around. producing something. ive recently gotten into ambient electronica / ambient techno production so im finding joy in stringing together a bunch of synths til i hit the 6 minute mark, adding random bitcrush effects, some percussion just so it looks like i actually did some work, maybe a vocal sample of someone whispering.......... and then i delete it gfkldjgslf. im actually working on a beat tape tho. its been a work in progress for the longest time. but if i actually managed to find my voice as an electronic music producer then i guess i could get somewhere. using a daw is new to me. im more of an instrumentalist. drummer and flutist, primarily. but i dont have any drums and my flute is at my grandmas so there's that..............
i also like to read!!! i buy like 3 - 4 books a month. havent bought any since like november. i only bought two i think. but its fine because ill always revisit my recent favorites. ummmmm... video games. i rly like those old school ass niche ps2 era games like mr. mosquito, space channel 5, kinetica, etc.
wow do i luv internet drama. so im probably reading up on someone’s dumb bullshit on reddit or something!! or youtube. i love internet drama, its my favorite thing on the internet. i live for watching people be the very worst!!! other than that??? i like to collect and try out different skincare and research ingredients cuz its just fun. might go to school to be an esthetician when this whole covid19 panera bread is over.
i love collecting obscure jazz records from taiwan.
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musashi · 3 years
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are there any stories/facts about your job/coworkers you can comfortably share? maybe something cool they did/you did with them recently? anyone that stands out in particular among them, without getting too specific for. clear reasons?
what's cheeseburger up to atm? any notable stories or anything about him recently, or has he been just living his best life as usual?
which of the skyloft NPCs do you particularly like? for arguments sake, this is excluding the more story relevant ones, so no groose + his gang, no zelda obviously, etc.
as an opposite to that, talk about groose! i've always loved him as a character, and the bits you've said about him and his relationship with link and zelda is always great! also, any notable kin memories you have of groose? especially things that occured after he left skyloft, or even after the demise fight. what did he get up to after the credits rolled?
fun stories about your loftwing? were there any traits you and him shared notably? or any that were more opposite?
what are some of your favorite things about your favorite iterations of zelda? what i mean by that is like... what do you like best about tetra/wind waker zelda? what about skyward zelda? botw zelda? they're similar but all unique people, so what endears you the most about each of them?
i know this is a lot, so don't feel like you have to answer in any specific time frame. take as long as is comfortable, and i hope this helps!! ~🍄
these are so many!!! thank you for being so generous!!!
are there any stories/facts about your job/coworkers you can comfortably share? maybe something cool they did/you did with them recently? anyone that stands out in particular among them, without getting too specific for. clear reasons?
most of the ppl i work w are. kinda rude to me all the time so i mostly just drown them out so i don’t go insane. but there is this one kid who is just, like, a ray of sunshine every time he walks into a room. and he works so hard and he cares about his work and i feel like he’s the only bitch who gets me. we vibe over zelda and will just get into debates about the lore on the clock and i look forward to seeing him a lot. 
what's cheeseburger up to atm? any notable stories or anything about him recently, or has he been just living his best life as usual?
he’s just doin he. he sleeps a lot. sometimes in boxes. sometimes under beds. sometimes directly on top of me.
a few weeks back i went to the ER for what i figured out was a kidney stone and while i was literally on my bed writhing in pain trying to hold out until my grandparents got there cheeseburger just like, jumped up on top of me and immediately starting pissing on me, as if to say haha, check this out. i can urinate better than you.
which of the skyloft NPCs do you particularly like? for arguments sake, this is excluding the more story relevant ones, so no groose + his gang, no zelda obviously, etc.
i love all of them so much oh no... everyone i love i love for kinnie reasons like i am tempted to say jakamar cause even though he’s kind of a sleazy dude he, as previously mentioned, smuggled me woodscraps to whittle fsdgjkfsgh
but parrow gives good hugs. and henya always has snacks hidden somewhere. and pumm will give you soup on the house sometimes if he can tell you’re in a rough mood. and and and........ i wuv skyloft. this is all kinnie bullshit actually.
as an opposite to that, talk about groose! i've always loved him as a character, and the bits you've said about him and his relationship with link and zelda is always great! also, any notable kin memories you have of groose? especially things that occured after he left skyloft, or even after the demise fight. what did he get up to after the credits rolled?
talked about him a lil bit in my last ask hehe
fun stories about your loftwing? were there any traits you and him shared notably? or any that were more opposite?
aepon & i were the kind of pair where we seemed really dissimilar on the surface but i think if anyone actually knew us they’d be able to discern pretty quickly that we were 100% twinning. like at face value i was a pretty calm and quiet person who was just, like. spacey and sleepy and vibing while things happened around me, and aepon was this absolute speed demon who had the biggest, loudest presence any time he entered a space. ppl in skyloft called him my red terror.
but the thing about my bird is that he was stubborn to a fault, and recklessly brave, and he just didn’t. stop. and he loved fiercely, the second i was awake in the morning i’d hear him circling overhead and shrieking his happy little shriek, he’d fill my head with all his thoughts of hanging out with me while i was trying to concentrate on work. all those things, we had in common, but i wouldn’t have been able to tell you that. someone like zelda probably would have. 
i think the best representation of it is at the beginning of everything when the tornado took zelda, the both of us just. dove right in. nothing else mattered, no conflict existed within either of us, i didn’t have to steer him in or send my intentions into our shared headspace, he just turned into an arrow flying straight into danger, and i went with him and we were one living being. like that’s our core. we are very opposite, until shit gets real, and then we are this beautiful unity tearing through the clouds. 
what are some of your favorite things about your favorite iterations of zelda? what i mean by that is like... what do you like best about tetra/wind waker zelda? what about skyward zelda? botw zelda? they're similar but all unique people, so what endears you the most about each of them?
HOW DO I COUNT THE WAYS I LOVE ZELDA AHHHHH
oot!zelda’s determination to defy fate... the way she refuses, from the start, to give in to darkness even though she’s only a little girl. the way she sees my commoner ass just waltz up into her private garden after breaking into her house still dressed in my stupid forest clothes and shes like. oh fuck yeah, wanna help me overthrow the gerudo king? and we’re, can’t stress this enough, ten. she’s so confident like she never worries about being powerless or out of her element, she never for a second believes this isn’t something she can fight. and when everything goes to shit she just keeps fighting!!! and still has the time to remind me that i can keep fighting too!!! literally where did she get that personality i love her so much!!!!
tetra’s fucking... simmering fire. her perfect balance between action and thought. like you can tell she’s pissed off and wants to start throwing punches but she always has the self-control to assess if it’s the thing to do in the moment. I CAN’T DO THAT!!! i’m pissed off i want to swords!!!! that motherfucker over there is PROVOKING ME!!!!! and tetra has the same fire inside her but she’s always just, like, “shut the fuck up, link. put your sword away. we need to get the jump on him.” and im like, AHHHHHHH because she’s always right. literally always. i don’t know how she does this but i think about it constantly. i love her level head and her scheming heart and her choice to carve her own destiny. i like how she finds out she’s a legendary princess from an age long past with sacred blood and shes just like ‘that’s cool but actually i’m tetra and i like to cuss and steal.’ and just does that forever. it resonates with me especially because even though the gods acknowledged me as the hero of winds i, like, wasn’t a ‘true’ incarnation of the hero. it’s just what i decided to be with what i was given. she and i are two sides of that coin and there is something beautiful abt that i don’t have words for. in a lot of ways she was my inspiration.
skyward!zelda’s um. everything? everything. i am so in love with her. i am so in love... with her. i am finding it harder to describe her than everyone else here which is so silly because she’s easily the person i was closest with. she’s just, like, made of fire and love? of passion. everything she is stems from what she loves--she loves old legends, and cliche romance stories, and stargazing, and going on adventures. zelda romanticizes everything in her life, she’ll stop mid-sentence to make you look at the sky because it struck her as particularly beautiful today, meanwhile i’m just like. thats the sky i see it every day i live here. and she’s so brave, so fierce, so resilient--there’s literally nothing that could scare her, i’m certain she got to the surface and immediately started spitting curses at blins, if ghirahim had actually found her alone she would have tried to come at him clawing and spitting. i was always so chill because all my anger was Stored in The Zelda, she’d just fight half my battles for me before i could register they were battles. idk. zelda was such an optimist who took everything in stride and believed, no matter what, that she could make it her own and make it beautiful and find something to adore within it. i might have had a quieter disposition, but she was always better at dealing with change than me. it was calming. i love her so much.
botw!zelda’s passion and inquisitive heart, oh my god, oh my god. i’m going to fucking fight everyone in the kingdom who ever made her feel like she talks too much. god it enthralls me, the way she just talks and talks and talks and LETS ME LISTEN, she lets me just SIT THERE and BASK IN IT like some kind of COLD REPTILE ON A ROCK. i literally cannot comprehend how she can fit so much knowledge about so many different things in her brain, and the way she’s ALWAYS BEEN LIKE THAT, literally just getting together with her techie friends and building whole ass machines when she was like 6 years old. shes looking at me like ‘oh this child prodigy curse my shortcomings why cant i be pulling enchanted swords when IM 12′ and im like PRINCESS YOU’RE FUCKING COOLER THAN ME LIKE CONGRATS I TOUCH A SWORD SOMETIMES AND YOU COULD LITERALLY MAKE A ROBOT TO DO THAT FOR YOU oh my god the way she doesn’t see how incredible she is makes me go insane i feel insane just thinking about it she’s the coolest fucking person i’ve ever met she’s the coolest person in hyrule the kingdom is too good for her i want her to take apart hyrule castle brick by brick and just leave a note behind that says ‘im too cool for you’ and then she gets on my ancient magic motorcycle and rides off into the sunset to some paradise far away and if i’m LUCKY she takes me with her. i love zelda
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misterbitches · 3 years
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some thots. having a bad time so this is rougher than usual. oh well
....
i guess he really does know hiim best cos if that was my mans (man specifically cos if anyone else did that id take it more srsly) i would be like oh my god ur singing me a love song? i would love it but i woudl SCREAM in embarrassment. UNLESS it was a really deep love song that's about us dying together.
like i want to eat ur skin type of thing (drain u nirvana) lmaoa but i really like this song it reminds me of that velvet underground song (the only one i know cos of juno lmao) and nico or whatever 'i'm sticking with you)
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my adhd would be out of fucking control i had to spend my time listening to this looking around i kept getting distracted by a tissue and thinking "wow this song is nice but i wish it would end bc i am getting distracted" and lo and behold i paused it and i have to pee and i know it's gonna take forever to undo this
ok about 12m later i turned it back on and they kissed and then he bit the corn then that night li chen also lost his virgin teas after watching gay porn and being like "hm interesting" and he'll be like "i see, ur dick is not medium sized"
i'm honestly gagging i cannot at this 12 year old marrying his mom
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beautiful theyre beautiful
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ayea you fucking psycho we do too because he was 17 and we had to witness it (or well, other people did cos i didnt watch the show even tho wayne song is [BEEEEEEEEEEEEEP BEEEEEP BEEEEP] and i want him to [BEEEEEEEP] and ppl even liked it which is fine like i get it in theory but they put this in my eyeballs so i'm gonna make fun of it bc it's fuckin DUMB lmao like i can't I CANNOT and he said "u were so persistent" BITCH UR 30??!?!???!?!?!?)capi hve it on mute and i tried to get a screencap of li chen and mu ren like together and not just his face but i cant find the timestamp and seeing their faces as they get married is literalyl traumattizing i'm like scremaing at my screen going "HE'S 5 HE'S 5 HE'S 5" and every time theyre like "we acn live forever together" like no bitch ur bones rae creaking
also is the officiator white? if anyone knows why or if that's common i'd love to know more. EDIT: HE ISN'T I JUST THOUGHT HE LOOKED LIKE MOBY FROM THAT ANGLE
anyway here
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i'm almost done with this fucking bullshit and i am in a really ould mood and usu they make it a bit better but imo it's kind of....annoying i guess balancing all these story elements and introducin gother couples (even in the periphery) since the story in itself can't focus. i feel like all in all the time spent with these two is a lot more limited and we get the feel for the rship because of their chemistry as actors, irl chemistry as friends and colleagues, and hopefully being happy and working on a good set. so it isn't the strength of the writing or production.
for some reason they get like less dynamic ways of being together which i think is part of their charm, they do things their own way, but the writers really should have substantiated this more. it's really just the way everyone in the show has managed to deliver these AWFUL story lines and production decisions (like seriously who the fuck was on costume? lighting?)
like maybe hot take but all the moments that are cringe and insane in the show are not pleasant, per se, because they aren't thought out clearly. so they're not a joy to watch in the normal sense but the actors are good enough to pull it off. i didn't cringe at the talks they had because it felt like actors like acting these lines out instead of us being embarrassed for it and you CAN TELL theyre embarrassed.
this is a huge kudos to the casting director and the actors and whatever crew that actually did a good job. i don't particularly like watching bo xiang and his grandfather husband not because of the content but because i feel like, to me, they're so awkward even though they have chemistry. i don't have that issue with xing si and his rapist brother boyfriend because watching them is actually really pleasant, it's intimate. this isn't to do with the story though because when it hits you how devoid this other person is and how stupid the situation is it changes (for me, for me, for me, this is all my opinion think whateverrrr u want im not telling u 2 ok!)
so truly kudos to this cast. idk if i'm misremembering here but imo the most cast appropriate series in this was crossing the line and close to you. one is a decent atmosphere and execution (yes even with that brother story line, notice the major key differences though because that's a sincere false equivalence. they try to execute power imbalances soooo badly and then fail every time but here's one meant to shock too and it was just likelmao ok girl?)
it may not make sense to say either in a writing way or for the character to do it but i believe that whoever the characters these people are supposed to be especially those super not well written on the page still get that message aacross (yong jie's actor is a good ex. not sure if i should ccongratulate him for having the worst job on earth and the worst character and his character is flat but. ostensibly they should let their actions speak for themselevs but what they do is they back themselves into a ccorner with unsuretyabout their characters or a dilemma that pops up they just want to excuse it. well guess hwat u couldnt do enough legwork. but to some extent the disposable side couple works here on a um "our eyes see them and get it" way
also to me it seems like they chose this story just to have this specific wedding. like it's a timely topic and i'm pretty sure like another provision? (correction? idk) was made WRT taiwanese same-sex marriage so it's topical but it isn't like a "papa and daddy" situation where they're interacting in it and there (for ex: the pride parade) and there being like real life terms and consequences. here it seems like they were like ah yes wedding ah yes dumb couple from modc bc we kiled off the other one sooooo (then outsource them to life love on the line u__u) then hamfisting in some fucking message which is funny bc
- despite the hints peppered in and the clear attraction they both acknowledge ur like ~not gay just him~ even tho...i mean i just. again they dont read over what they write i don't think considering. but wahtever.
- the only gay dude (verbally said) is with his rapist brother with an awful power dynamic oh or IS a rapist (gao) (or his brother but i think it was just a "im a psycho so it's him" thing unless they said it. in which case idc cos i wasnt paying attn but that's also not great) or i guess the wedding but like....that's also a ridiculously inappropriate and dumb relationship taht it's built on. i mean i don't really see much respect her so i dont particularly want to hear abt gay weddings being important when they didn't even utilize it in the story beforehand and have we ever. this is a huge indication to me that it was a reverse engineered chosen story beforehand (if it was one) or thought of
soooooo
so reversal of that....it didnt give us enough time to breathe with these two at all but for both of the actors they can capitalize what's on the page and the writers didn't. like their dynamic is very i give/you give like taking car eof each other etc that's why
again, no artist worth their salt will ever say their work meant nothing. that's a cover up. i'm sick of lazy production and then getting away with it claiming being subversive or attacking an issue by not doing anything. we show crazy shit all the time but it has a POINT and ur point is "i like the gays" then girl.....i mean it's not great
but the acting really carried it. i have a feeling if this series continues it might continue to use more experienced actors cos maybe the budget goes up but they also have less inhibitions now when it comes to acting. i like the way li chen expresss himself and teng teng too. i like anson a lot and there's some angles that did not do any favors and i think eh has to get more control of his body movements (bc he's SO LARGE and thin) but he wasn't bad at all and there were real human tears. of course i, personally, favor charles tu. he has more control over his body because he has...less to work with and he's a bit bigger and he was really great in this role. he's a himbo a bit of a meathead but you like him. you like them. there's some things i think they had them say and do that they wouldn't let happen if they stuck to the characters and the story (mainly liking that dumb idiot rapist)
what i notice is that the reprehensible actions people criticize others for in the show and in real human life lalways gets turned around. teng teng being surprised that this boy's grandfather boyfriend met him when he was a junior in high school and he's 12 years older and him apologizing for being shocked and then whatshisface going "ur better at it than most people" and then the convo about gao with whatshisface and then rapist brother comes to pick him up. they are admonishing gao but thinking that rapist brother is noble for doin gwhat he did (and oh rapist brother shows up) like the hypocrisy and the decisions are immense. so now it's like "guys see he's a great guy" like girl STICK TO SOMETHING but whatever so i live in this universe where muren and li chen do everything right and have lots of different interesting fun seex with all their friends. i would write this but i cannot i am dying
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the-dumbest-po3-au · 4 years
Text
part 4 - the dumbest po3 au
its been. nine. montsh im SO SORRY GUYS LMAO
for those of you who dont know what the dumbest po3 au is, click this link
for those of you who have not read the summaries for power of three, part 1 - part 2 - part 3
alright!!!!!!! dovewing time
the fourth apprentice
the book opens w/ ivykit and dovekit in the nursery. ivykit suggests going out to explore the territory and dovekit is like “wow. that sounds like a fantastic idea ivykit you are so smart"
whitewing says No Absolutely Not, and leaves at some point to go make dirt. they sneak out and not 5 minutes later they get lost. dovekit gets blames ivykit for suggesting it and they get into a fight. they both get really mad & dovekit runs off. because shes like a stupid 2 year old gets distracted, rams her head into a rock and passes out. rip dovekit. she wakes up and sees a fox kit coming towards her. she screams.
her head hurts and shes tired and now shes going to die. out of nowhere a huge cat beats up the fox and scares it away. dovekit passes out (again)
when she wakes up, she is next to a cat messing with a bunch of weird plants. the cat sees that she woke up and introduces himself as littlecloud. he asks what her name is. “dove… dove…?? i dont know” says dovekit.
he asks her how she got there, and if she has any family. she does not remember. so littlecloud tells her she’s gonna have to stay here for the time being. he asks her if anything hurts, and dovekit says she thinks may have hit her head.
he gives her some of the weird plants and she goes back to sleep. when she wakes up her head has stopped hurting and she feels a lot better. she gets up to go walk around and is immediately introduced to the tawnyspawn.
tigerpaw is stupid and friendly (and hellbent on being her future best friend). dawnpaw is obnoxious and a bit (read: extremely) condescending but interested. flamepaw is nice and also the only one with half a braincell.
they take her around and introduce her to the rest of the clan. she sees blackstar and is like. “im pretty sure thats my dad” tigerpaw gasps. flamepaw and dawnpaw are like. “What.” “he saved me from the fox im pretty sure thats my dad,” says dovekit
they go harass blackstar. dovekit follows him around like a puppy and the tawnspawn follow her. he has this train of literal 2 yr olds trailing after him and is wildly unhappy about this development. russetfur is also definitely siccing the kids on him to make him mad.
dawnpaw gives dovekit a passionate speech about the clans, but mostly how evil riverclan kicked completely innocent shadowclan out of their home, and how shadowclan has to set everything right and deliver justice to those cringe fail fishheads, or something.
a few days later the tawnyspawn are off doing their own thing and dovekit goes to see whats going on. dawnpaw tries to shut tigerpaw up but he spills the beans anyways. “we’re going to attack riverclan on a Secret Mission so that we can win back shadowclan’s honor and become WARRIORS so you cant tell anybody”
dawnpaw sighs. “dovekit this is for Big Kids Only, so you cant be here.” flamepaw is trying to talk tigerpaw out of doing this in the bg but tigerpaw is being stubborn. dovekit is sad about it but goes back to sulk in camp (and to harass her new dad).
a few hours later tawnypelt runs over to blackstar and is like. “blackstar my children are missing nobody knows where they went”
"oh!! they went to go attack riverclan to get back shadowclan’s territory!” informs dovekit helpfully.
“what.” says blackstar, tawnypelt, and russetfur in unison. the sky immediately opens up and starts Pouring. tawnypelt freaks out. dovekit is like “why cant we just follow the sound of their voices??” but everyone ignores her bc they think shes just being stupid.
“Fine!! ill just go find them on my OWN” says dovekit, following them by the sound of their voices (theyre proally arguing over something stupid).
now four of shadowclan’s children are missing. “you brought that kid here so you get to deal with her,” says russetfur. blackstar sighs dramatically and goes off to find his new child.
dovekit runs into an old man cat. “whatre you doin here??” says old man cat. “im looking for my friends!! whats your name :0? im dovekit!!” “my names purdy!”
blackstar shows up and is like. who tf are you. “this is my new friend purdy!!!” says dovekit. blackstar doesnt even know how to respond. “look we’re going to go back to the camp right now and we’re not taking this dude with us.”
dovekit is like “??? no??? we have to get my friends theyre right over there??” she says pointing in their direction w/ her tail. blackstar is ready to cry. so blackstar and purdy follow dovekit as she leads them closer to riverclan territory where they hear the tawnyspawn screeching like banshees.
they run over and find several cats w/ the tawnyspawn who are pinned down. “if you breathe in my direction ill kill all three of these children,” says a snotty dude.
“who tf are you” says blackstar
“im darktail you insolent snot,” says darktail.
one of his cats grabs dovekit and blackstar snaps. he lunges at darktail while purdy beats up the dude who snatched dovekit. the tawnyspawn take advantage of the moment, escape, and dogpile the other cats. its a disaster.
darktail swears revenge on blackstar till his dying day or something. nobodys really paying attention to him at this point. he runs off w/ his crew. “alright then” says blackstar. this has been a really weird and long day for everyone. blackstar wants to leave purdy but all the children immediately start crying. they bring purdy home.
“holy crap!!! purdy!!!!!” says tawnypelt. “why are you here??” but then she sees her children. she and rowanclaw give them a very stern lecture about Not Running Off Without Telling Anyone (in which tawnypelt is a massive hypocrite but to be fair god told her to)
in the meanwhile, blackstar asks dovekit how tf she knew they were there. “i could hear them, Obviously. ???? cant u not???” blackstar just looks at her. dovekit realizes that probably not everyone shares this ability. blackstar shoos her off and calls a meeting w/ the senior warriors.
dovekit goes off to bother purdy for stories and play w/ the tawnyspawn. nothing particularly interesting happens. blackstar and russetfur call her over later and start assessing her abilities. its only slightly a disaster because shes wildly distracted 80% of the time and her powers are unwieldy bc shes a kit.
cue training. there is a lot of trial, error, and tears (on both sides) but it works out in the end (mostly).
time skip. its been a few months. dovekit becomes dovepaw and blackstar mentors her b/c of her powers. at this point shes gotten control of how to pick out numbers, locations, troops, etc. basically she is a living radar.
blackstar calls another meeting w/ the senior warriors and afterwards calls a clan meeting. “alright losers we’re going to take back our territory and kick riverclan’s butt”
they go over the clan w/ all the cats and begin the trek home. another time skip because that takes a while and nothing particularly interesting happens.
when they get back, the clan stays outside the border while blackstar has dovepaw do a sweep of the territory. she finds a patrol led by a black cat named reedwhisker. blackstar picks a patrol out and they go to ambush the riverclan patrol.
the shadowclan patrol takes reedwhisker + the patrol hostage, but lets one go to tell mistystar. mistystar takes a patrol and comes over. “if you dont give us back our territory i will kill your son” says blackstar. mistystar is like “bro. i dont even want your stupid crusty territory anyways. screw you.”
she takes her son and the rest of the patrol and leaves. another win for shadowclan, obviously. maybe they have a party idk. end of book.
fading echoes
cinderheart has not been doing well. she’s been doing really badly, actually. her best friend died and she blames herself. she’s still grieving and continually lashing out at everyone around her. poppyfrost and honeyfern attempted to be there for her but after the continual rebuffs they decided to just give her space.
unfortunately cinderheart. doesnt have any other friends in thunderclan, so the only person she can talk to is lionblaze. unfortunately theres only so much he can do from windclan, so mostly shes been just been going into a downward spiral.
ivypaw hasnt been doing great either. she feels extremely guilty because she thinks its her fault that dovekit ran away, and when dovekit is never found, it gets 50x worse.
but she also doesnt want to say anything about her involvement in fear of getting punished. as time goes on, she starts getting babied by the clan (almost like leopardstar when she was a kid) because her sister disappeared and she took it really hard.
and like on one hand, she likes the attention, but on the other hand its too much a lot of the time. she starts adopting this “stop babying me!1!1!!!”/kinda edgy persona. the clan takes it like shes grieving, and she’ll grow out of it, so they dont say too much.
so the book opens w/ ivypaw and fernpaw’s apprentice ceremony. brief context about how fern was recently found by the thunderclan border w/o parents and taken into the clan. fernsong is apprenticed to brightheart. ivypool is apprenticed to cinderheart.
firestar probably thinks that they might be able to bond/break through to each other because they recently lost a sister/adjacent sister. neither of them are particularly enthusiastic about it.
cinderheart isnt particularly invested in ivypaw’s training. ivypaw can tell and gets rightfully frustrated, bc brightheart and fernpaw are getting along great and making lots of progress, while ivypaw is falling behind becuase cinderheart is being a terrible mentor.
ivypaw starts fighting back (disobeying, talking back, etc.), partially because this is the only time she gets paid attention, and partially because shes just mad, which makes cinderheart mad, which then makes ivypaw fight back more. this causes cinderheart to become more and more distant. in short: ivypaw’s apprenticeship is a disaster.
at some point during training, theyre practicing climbing trees and cinderheart tells ivypaw to do something. to spite her, ivypaw does the opposite and ends up falling, dislocating her leg. cinderheart panics and cinderpelt emerges.
cinderpelt basically possesses cinderheart and relocates her arm. they go back to camp and take ivypaw to the medicine cat den, gives ivypaw some poppy seeds and ditches.
“wow um. wtf was that” says cinderheart. leafpool is like, “hahaha………… about that. you’re um… cinderpelt reincarnated.”
“what.” says cinderheart
“CINDERHEART IS CINDERPELT REINCARNATED???” screams foxleap at the top of his lungs in the middle of camp. whatever was left of cinderheart’s life shatters.
so now instead of ignoring her, the entire camp won’t leave her alone - except now they just treat her as they would cinderpelt. “hey cinderheart remember when [enter something that happened in the old forest here]??” “hey cinderheart can you fix my paw??” “hey cinderpelt-” “are you going to become a medicine cat then??”
to pour more salt into the wound, cinderheart now gets a free commentary on everything in her life!! (this definitely includes lionblaze) there used to be sort of a barrier between cinderheart/cinderpelt but since cinderpelt emerged/took control, it shattered.
so between cinderpelt complaining about all the terrible decisions she’s made and the entire clan pretending that she’s cinderpelt instead of a Completely Different Person, when hawkfrost shows up w/ an invite to fight club on the weekends cinderheart is more than happy to take him up.
sure hawkfrost is wildly annoying and clearly hates her guts for some reason (no matter how hard he pretends not to whenever tigerstar is around) but this is great for three reasons.
1) nobody in the dark forest has any idea she’s cinderpelt. 2) warrior training!! emphasizing she is a Warrior not a medicine cat. 3) time away from cinderpelt!! they arent the same soul so they cant read each other’s thoughts (unless theyre trying to communicate) and cant share dreams
so she might be purposely oblivious. whatever. she doesnt even know who hawkfrost is b/c anybody outside of riverclan immediately forgot about him because he really was not very effective at all. and its not like hes about to start spilling the beans until shes ready to be indoctrinated w/ dark forest propaganda.
meanwhile, tensions between shadowclan and thunderclan have been rapidly rising. again. prey is being stolen, scents are on other territories, patrols get into skirmishes often.
firestar is hurt because he was trying to get mistystar to lay off on the territory and blackstar is mad because they literally Just got back and thunderclan is ALREADY trying to reinstate old rivalries.
cinderheart really isnt paying attention to what’s going on cuz shes. more than a little wrapped up in her own problems. until it turns into a war.
this battle feels way more vicious than normal. cinderheart tries to recall how this whole thing started and realizes she has absolutely no idea what tf is going on???
throughout the fight she notices weird stuff happening. mousewhisker and redwillow nod to each other. ratscar + blossomfall swap glances. applefur pulls snowbird off thornclaw’s back. literally wtf thinks cinderheart
and then russetfur takes a stab at firestar. out of nowhere, thornclaw goes for her throat. cinderheart barely saves russetfur in the nick of time - the injuries are bad enough that she is forced to retire.
“screw literally everyone in thunderclan except u” blackstar says pointing @ cinderheart “and i hope the rest of you rot in the dark forest.” he rounds the rest of shadowclan up and then leaves.
“well that was weird” says cinderheart. she goes off to find ivypaw and realizes that shes. not responding. oh thats a lot of blood-
cinderpelt pops up again and works w/ cinderheart to patch up ivypaw until she’s stable. they bring her into the medicine den together and let leafpool look her over. she says that they made it in time and ivypaw will live. she leaves to go look after the other patients, leaving cinderheart with her apprentice
cinderheart realizes that this is her fault. had she actually paid attention to ivypaw and given her proper training, this wouldn’t have happened. she resolves to try a lot harder to be a good mentor for ivypaw’s sake.
cinderpelt approves and apologizes for being so intrusive on cinderheart’s life. she really doesnt want to be in here either - this was a decision the idiots in starclan forced on her. she was taking it out on cinderheart, which wasn’t fair for her.
cinderpelt promises to try to give cinderheart as much privacy as she can (while trying to figure out how to get out of her brain). cinderheart thanks her. there’s a brief bonding moment.
cinderpelt says that since ivypaw seems stable she’s going to go to sleep now, since she exhausted herself earlier.
just as cinderpelt goes out to the back of cinderheart’s mind, blossomfall comes storming in about how cinderheart messed the plan up and how cinderheart screwed everything up for everyone & she’s a traitor to the cause, Honestly cinderheart you’re so useless-
“literally wtf are you talking about” says cinderheart
“you saved russetfur,” blossomfall says. “if we take out the leaders and deputies, we can destabilize the clans enough that taking over will be a piece of cake. are you a dark forest trainee or not, cinderheart?”
end of book
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Guess who watched Frozen2 yesterday and is back on her AU Juice
ok get this, using thomas’s rewrite for Frozen 1 but also 
you know that theory where Hans is like,,,, a chill dude, and the rock trolls are the evil ones and mind-controlled him into fuckin shit up so Christof would become king? also that
Spoilers for Frozen 2 so,,,, be wary
Virgil is Elsa 
Paranoid shut-in, afraid of scary ice powers, convinced himself he’s perfectly comfortable with being alone forever. Distrusts Dee immediately because he can sense the presence of magic in him, but he doesn’t know that’s what it is at first
Patton is Ana 
Emotionally volatile, quick to trust/immediately assumes the best in people, bit of a hopeless romantic
Roman is Christof 
Agrees to help Patton because “ur a prince, I cant let you do this alone it’s not noble of me to leave u hanging like that”
Remus is Roman’s funky twin brother who would rather just continue being a rock troll honestly
Kinda functions as Sven/Olaf/comic relief buddy character but they also DO have an Olaf and a reindeer steed to pull the wagon. He's hanging out with Patton and Roman during most of the movie
Deceit is Hans
Actually a prince from another country who’s like an ok dude and does grow fond of Patton immediately after meeting him, not evil until later
Logan is the head guard/politician guy with the big nose that was their advisor/guardian after their parents died, you know the guy
He's gonna be much more important in the story. He mostly tails Dee and slowly figures out that there’s something weird about him towards the end, and tries to protect Virgil and Patton from him. He cares about them so much, but he’s bad with emotions, so he’s not great at helping Patton with his loneliness or helping Virgil with his anxiety. Even when the rest of the kingdom starts to turn against them, he never doubts that Virgil is good
Character Thomas is Olaf because that’s cute as hell
He’s an embodiment of Virgil’s love for and protectiveness over Patton, but the longer he exists, the more he starts to develop his own personality and traits based on who he spends time with? So eventually Logan, Roman, Remus, Deceit, and Patton all become a part of him too, and he’s their little amalgamation snow son
(plot stuff under the cut. be warned, i put waaaay too much goddamn thought into this)
Ok so most of the first movie happens as normal. Thomas is just a lovable little anxious snow boy who walks around and dotes over and protects Patton, Reindeer is just a regular animal, Virgil runs away after a freakout, Patton goes to find him, etc etc etc
But when Hans is on the road in the first movie (when him and some soldiers have just captured Virgil from his ice castle and are marching back to the kingdom) their caravan is jumped by the rock trolls. Virgil doesn’t know whats going on cause he’s trapped in a carriage with no windows, but the rock trolls lure Dee away and then do the evil magic thing, they puppet him from then on to imprison Virgil and refuse to kiss Patton.
Roman and Remus drop Patton off and return to the woods, right? Roman’s being all reluctant about it, and Remus is like “im sure he still wants to be ur friend bro, it doesnt matter that he’s a prince and we’re common, you KNOW he doesnt care about all that” but Roman is not convinced, says he’ll ‘think about it’. They return to the rock trolls, and Remus sees the shaman in the process of puppeting Dee, in the “if only there was someone who loved you” scene where Patton is clearly dying. Remus runs to tell Roman what’s really happening, and they get caught. Roman stays behind to fight off the other rock trolls, buying Roman time to race towards the castle and save the brothers
The “if only there was someone who loved you” scene is different, tho. First of all, Dee doesn’t say that. He (and the shaman) are too smart to give up the bit until they are SURE they’ve won. Dee refuses to kiss Patton, but in like a soft way. (Got this scene from my friend Nat on discord, one of the reasons i made this au at all, its fucking KILLER) It’s more like a 
“i mean yes im fond of you but I don’t love you??? We just met” “but you proposed!” “We’re princes, looking for love in marriage is an idea I abandoned a long time ago. I figured I could at least make you happy, and an alliance between our kingdoms would be favorable.” “Oh...” “I could see myself falling in love with you, Patton, i mean that. But right now... If I could break the curse, I would. I’m deeply sorry.... Is there anything I can do to keep you warm?“ “No, there’s nothing...” “How dare your bother turn his magic against you? First he freezes the kingdom, then that golem, then he curses his own brother? (he does a whole schpeil where he convinces an emotionally broken and shellshocked Patton that Virgil is actually like evil and bad) ...Sit here, I will get you some blankets.” (Again, quote @glorifiedpigeon! She wrote a whole scene like this with Dee as Hans and Roman as Elsa, its bonkers as hell!! So good!)
While he’s gone “getting blankets” (Dee’s really just gonna leave him to freeze) Thomas sneaks in, and starts up a fire. Patton tells him not to do that cause he’ll melt, and he’s like “some people are worth melting for.” Thomas can tell Patton he’s upset and they talk about Virgil and how Patton doesn’t know what to think anymore. Thomas melts while keeping the fire warm for Patton, his sacrifice breaks the cold-poison-curse-thing and Patton is saved. The conversation Patton has with Thomas while he’s dying is weirdly familiar, and Patton realizes that it’s a 1 to 1 of a conversation him and Virgil had when they found out there parents died, when Virgil promised to “protect you no matter what, i love you.” Patton realizes Thomas was just a representation of Virgil’s brotherly love for him, which is cute as fuck, and then he goes to save his brother.
Virgil is visited by Logan, who busts him out of his cell, telling him he never doubted him for a second, but he’s wary of Dee. They run away together, panning to go out and find Patton and finally talk everything out. Dee reaches them, and calls Logan a traitor to the crown for helping Virgil escape, insisting that the fact that they are running away proves Virgil’s guilt. Logan tells Virgil to stay calm and keep a hold on his powers, and goes to confront Dee alone. Dee twists Logan’s words and just makes them sound more suspicious, eventually whacking Logan with the handle of his sword and knocking him out. Virgil is enraged, and attacks Dee. He almost kills him, but then Roman arrives, and stops Virgil from landing a killing blow. He’s about to explain what’s happening, and that Dee can still be saved and it’s not his fault, but Dee (with the rock troll magic being channeled through him) Silences Roman with a spell, so he cant speak. 
At the moment, Virgil is scared, distressed, and kinda cornered since he refuses to leave Logan’s unconscious body, and Virgil has no reason to trust Roman. All Roman knows about Virgil is that he’s wicked powerful and volatile, and he knows he can’t let Hans kill Virgil. This leads to the three of them all fighting each other 1v1v1, Hans trying to kill Roman and Virgil, Virgil trying to fend off Hans and Roman, and Roman trying to keep ether of the other two from killing each other while protecting himself.
Patton finally reaches them, and sees Roman knocked out and trapped in ice, incapacitated by Virgil, and Virgil is doin some ice magic at Dee, about to kill him, or at least wound him, to escape. Patton protects Dee, and is like “Yo no wait Virgil, you both have the wrong idea! He’s just scared of you, he’s not bad!” And Roman really wants to say “He IS bad but not in the way you think!”, but he’s still silenced. Virgil’s like “uh yeah he IS bad, look at what he did to Logan!” 
Finally, Remus catches up. He runs in from behind Dee and Patton, so they don’t see him approach until he yells to them about the trolls and whats actually going on. While they’re all distracted, Dee attacks Patton, holding him at knife-point and using him as a hostage to get Virgil to stop with the magics.
How is this fight resolved? Fuck if I know, I kinda wrote myself into a corner lmao. They are somehow able to incapacitate/trick dee, and Virgil uses his magic to override the trolls and free him from the mind-control.
And, at the end, there’s this cute little scene, after Patton is explaining everything that happened to Virgil and vice versa, where Patton’s like:
“Wait, wait! Can you resurrect Thomas??” and Virgil’s all snarky about it like “I dont know, wouldn’t that lessen the impact of his sacrifice? He’s like, a part of me, right? I think he’d like to go out all melancholy and poetic like that” “Virgil oh my goodness if you dont bring back my little snowman buddy I will cry here and now” “Okay, okay, jeez”
HERE IS WHERE THE SECOND MOVIE COMES IN
pretty much the only thing that changes is this: you know the voice thing that Elsa just starts hearing out of nowhere as a sign to fix past wrongs and whatnot? Virgil only starts hearing them now BECAUSE the rock trolls were blocking the signal from reaching him. And, Dee comes with them on this adventure and kinda redeems himself over the course of the movie by being a cool dude. And, the grampa who did the betraying was ALSO controlled by the rock trolls way back when; the rock trolls have been trying to destabilize the magic for years so that they could siphon more of it away from the spirits for their own personal use, and they got greedy once they had humans (re and ro) to work with, wanting political power as well. (Dee has been staying with them in their kingdom, as the ambassador from his country or whatever)
And for all you Shippers out there
the ships for this could be literally anything, dude. like literally any combination works, go fucking hogwild. Doesn’t even have to have a romantic ship or anything, it could just be everyone being platonic lovely babies.
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zepdeans · 5 years
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this is highkey like a month late (i mean wbk im a chronic scatterbrain procrastinator) and she’s thicccc but without further ado. my skam s4 thoughts.
I first just want to say a couple things: im not a muslim woc so my thoughts on s4 don’t hold as much value as those of a muslim, woc, or a muslim woc. I also don’t know to what degree sana’s representation was true to real life. I made an effort to look for posts from muslim woc on sana’s season but to no real avail, especially given it’s been two years since skam ended and a lot of blogs have deactivated, changed urls, or posts have become buried :( [if you know of any good posts regarding sana’s season please lmk!]. from what I can recall in 2017, there were mixed opinions on s4 with most being upset (or at least disappointed) with the ultimate execution of sana’s storyline and I agree w that. while s4 means so much to me and has a really special place in my heart, I do 100% acknowledge its flaws. ok!!!!!! lets get into it😤
ep1 -as much as I wished isak stayed in kollektivet I’m glad he and even had a rlly sweet happy time this entire season. also evak making their friends move all their furniture while they whisper romantic shit to each other and makeout? peak comedy -you fuckin wish!!! -sana is the one to say “of course you should tell noora about william”.. she Knew and still takes the fall for it :( -this opening clip is such a jarring shift into sana’s pov!! e.g. while easy to overlook in previous seasons, sana’s exclusion from the girls is glaringly obvious once we’re looking through her eyes -adding onto that! sana is the friend who notices everyone else- she’s so observant, which hurts even more when you notice her friends don’t do the same (except mayhaps chris- in my heart of hearts I know chris is also the friend who notices and goes unnoticed, but unfortunately we don’t get enough of her and sana’s relationship this season to fully see that) -yousef and the balloon squad’s entrance.... ICONIC! also I cant believe for 2 seasons they presented those dickbag nissen 97s as the be all end all of hot amazing boys when the bakka third years were RIGHT THERE like,, the penetrators vs. balloon squad + even? no contest ma’am -also! it’s so interesting that we literally had no idea sana had a brother, or that yousef etc existed until now? it’s as if she has a whole private world at home, separate from her friends and nissen (and I think a theme of this season is those two worlds merging) -im obsessed w the yousana train scene but yousef being the only one who notices sana standing off to the side? ;-; -fy faen is such a stunning clip oh my god. when sana leaves to pray? possibly my favourite skam scene ever. it’s exquisite.  -sana is so cute and awkward squeezing thru the crowd shsdhgfhshdf I LOVE her love her -the last shot on yousef and noora... oh my GOD oh my god bc like. being that friend who never ever tells your real feelings or your crushes or is vulnerable with your friends?? and then having to listen to them talk about how good your crush would be with someone else (especially one of ur friends) while ur sitting there silently dying inside? and you don’t say anything since you can’t be vulnerable with your friends and u don’t think u stand a chance anyways so. (in the words of s3 noora. I think sana struck a nerve with the emotional unavailability! abbey r u ok) -this episode is a masterpiece and did such a phenomenal job of both introducing us to sana’s perspective while also touching on a multitude of her struggles AND establishing the themes of the season. plus the cinematography, editing, soundtrack and aesthetic...... o baby. (case in point I deadass just rewatched it after writing this)
ep2 -every shot of sana praying is beautiful (and beautifully edited!!) -sana’s room is usually messy... not smart enough to fully analyze this but I’m sure it means something  -an interesting contrast of what’s expected of her vs. of elias- I can’t speak for muslim families, but I know even in non-muslim families girls are always held to suchhh a higher standard (source: I have 2 brothers rip) -”if you find immaturity charming” hilarious bc sana actually does in fact find immaturity charming  -what’s interesting is how noora comes across in sana’s POV- kinda obnoxious, kinda ignorant, seemingly perfect (compared to how noora is portrayed in eva’s season, for example) -even is one of those ppl who uses the bill gates argument on why dropping out of school makes u richer sdfhfsjskfjfsd -sana staring down the pepsi max squad. fuck em up. -vilde adding magnus to the groupchat jfkjsjfdjfsfsdkj -isak missing eskild :’) sidenote I fucking live for isak and sana’s chats this season. they’re literally my lifeblood like.... 
ep3 -the kiss me scene god I go FERAL -“you need to pull it towards you, not push it away. okay?” yall mind if i SCREAM!! YOUSEF!!!!!!!!!! -there rlly is something about seeing sana, who in everyone else’s POV comes off as cold and harsh and stoic, just absolutely meltinggg when she talks w yousef like she doesn’t stop smiling she’s so sweet!!!! ah🥰 and yousef is 100% that guy who ppl tell “your gf is so intimidating and ruthless bro” and he’s like are y’all talking about sana??????? my baby?? my fuckin cinnamon apple????? -yousef’s lil smile watching sana peel carrots. 911 it’s me again -vilde and sana’s relationship has a really interesting dynamic bc like.. vilde says ignorant shit to sana while also genuinely looking up to her. and sana is probably the harshest to vilde within the group but it’s because she actually values their friendship a lot  -IM HURT BECAUSE YOU NEVER REPLIED TO MY MEME -sana pulling 2yr old receipts off the top of her head to defend vilde. god I stan -sana doin research taking notes..... shameful she isn’t canonically a virgo (honestly her and isak both but like-) -she’s so soft and smiley w her mamma awh... “of course he likes you, who doesn’t like you?” her mamma only knows the real, gentle, beautiful loving sana oh im CRY -even is so kind and loving and thoughtful yall mind if i....... -”you can’t escape the internet girl” foreshadowing mayhaps?
ep4 -david and ulrikke together are fucking hilarious -noora’s “you’re lucky you don’t have to think about this stuff, heartbreak and that” :/ it’s not just vilde who says ignorant things to sana! -that being said sana and noora are cute asf in the exper5 scene.. dorky noora rise (omg josefine and her yogurt in the bloopers too sjhfkjdf) -I HANDLE BALLS BETTER THAN YOU -the yousana scene is sooo gorgeous whew...... -I always cry a lil bit (ok a lot) when yousef brings up even. and sana knew too. even sweetie ily :( -sana talking about her religion is beautiful. it’s so lovely to learn about how she thinks and sees the world. -yousef’s smile watching sana leave like ur kidding right....... -“flawless since 99″ is so cringey. it’s so cringeyyy -sana uses “smh” I knew we were soulmates
ep5 -eavesdropping on ur parent/brother’s argument is peak sibling culture -when ur always paranoid but ur always right..... -sana’s green jumpsuit sign me up babey -I really really really love elias and sana’s conversation -u dont even realize how tiny sana is until she’s standing next to isak and even -not finding out why yousef avoided the fight and why he kissed noora will haunt me forever (could we not have expanded more on that instead of noorhelm.......) -the parallel of sana washing isak’s blood off her hands vs. her washing her hands during maghrib in episode 1. gotta sit down. -vilde gossiping to the pepsimax girls stings SO bad it’s just such a betrayal?:( -“the other girls seem cool, especially noora! she’s so pretty!” ok much to unpack here but: sana again comparing herself to noora (who she sees as /perfect/)... sana being written off despite putting so much effort and passion into the russ bus while noora, who has done literally nothing and at best is indifferent to russ, is the one they like the most. disgusteng -love will tear us apart.. bitch..... -sana abt to cry god I can’t -if sana is anything like me (I mean I think she is but jkjjkhsdfhfsd). looking stupid is the absolute worst so like, her sending out emails abt being bus boss when she was actually being lied to? being played? and her being “paranoid” about sara being shady, but deciding hey maybe im just being crazy? except she wasn’t she was right and she Knew!! and she’s probably thinking how dumb it was for her to get her hopes up, everything always ends badly anyways and no one actually likes her :((((((( -dont rlly know what my feelings are on the fight. im not against it bc isak does have a temper but his apparent motive always seemed weak to me?? and god I feel so bad for even
ep6 -forgot about sana getting bullied in middle school yall mind if I sob?? -sana lying and getting defensive bc it’s hard to be vulnerable, or because she hates looking stupid? or both?:( -isak looking up dandelions in his textbook just bc even put one behind his ear. I HATE this man -sana’s dad asking if she had a bad day aw :( -all the boys (and sana) wearing black but yousef wearing white.... what does it mean.............. -the carrots are back goddammit -radio station playing during this scene: “if I have to choose between the just non-muslim and the unjust muslim, without any doubt I would choose the non-muslim who is just” -ISAK’S NOSE SFFJDFJFSDKJSDF -sana’s text about chris I’m going to bawl my eyes out.           “yeah! looking forward (to going to nissen) but a bit worried. don’t know               anyone else starting there.”           (J: new friends?) “yes, at least one of them. I have german with her (chris)           and she’s very cool!” -the contrast of how blunt sana came off when we’re first introduced to her vs. how she was really just excited to make a new friend bc she was scared no one would like her :( especially knowing her past with bullying and how nervous she was to start at nissen? chris baby I LOVE YOU thank u ;-; -also sana keeping 2yr old conversations on her phone... same -sana is honestly too smart and scheming and overthinking for her own good. she has these elaborate plans that more-or-less always get ruined by her being more kind than she gives herself credit for (e.g. wanting to protect vilde in s1, clearing isak’s name in s4) -everyone in skam texts back so fast smh -chris calling sana “sonic”...... a moment please -I cannot watch the sana/evak apartment scene without thinking of the bloopers and losing it lmfaoooo.. “this is where we live. just come in” -ik it’s based off fanart but there is little I hate more than their matching outfits  -“remember you’re both geniuses!” 🥺even  -once again isak studying is uhhhh me - “you’re a good person” yall i love isak i really do. he puts his foot in his mouth pretty often and doesn’t have a great brain-to-mouth filter and he can be awkward and rambly and blunt and unsure of what to say in emotional situations but also? he’s so genuine. it’s just his honest thoughts and he says it bc he cares about sana and knows she needs to hear it!! -ᶠᵃᵉⁿ ᵉᵛᵉⁿ -sana’s inner turmoil.. thank u iman for inventing acting (ik I haven’t mentioned it much yet but god iman is SUCH a phenomenal actor I owe her my life) -LETS GO BITCHES
ep7 -sana crying silently in her room breaks my fucking heart (IMAN!!!!)  -idk how I feel about the instagram plot but sana watching as her plan falls into place and then storming up to sara... pretty bada$$ -“it’s creepy it was published but it’s more creepy we have a bus boss who talks shit about everyone” THANK YOU vilde -i love s4 isak thanks -sana and jamilla’s chat aw :~) -how awkward do yall think the walk to the bench was lmfao -what sana tells isak is SO powerful and I love it a lot -isak does actually make a good point- the other girls are like that too.  -unfortunately I have been in situations isak describes, where you want to learn more about your friend’s culture or religion because you care about them and you’re genuinely interested, but you don’t know what questions are okay to ask and you don’t want to sound rude or ignorant, so you ultimately end up asking no questions at all. but I hate that the responsibility is put on sana to constantly educate people bc I cannot imagine how exhausting that must be [[[ok so. I know there are VERY mixed opinions on the bench scene but here’s my dumbass two cents. 1- I genuinely think isak was trying to make sana feel better by attempting to relate to her and pass on advice that really helped him. however, I don’t think isak realized what sana eventually told him- that her experience wearing the hijab is a lot different than isak’s experience as a gay man. do I agree with everything isak said? nooo. do I understand why he said it? yeah. 2- it was not isak’s place to tell sana norwegians aren’t racist, or not to look for racism in questions. I think there’s some truth to ppl often just being ignorant, and he does add that there are probably a lot of racist people in Norway, but yeah. not great. 3- in conclusion I think while isak shared some meaningful advice w sana, he put his foot in his mouth too and said some stupid shit. im not trying to defend that. I will add, though: a. we actually do see some growth on isak’s part. when he and even are yelled at on the street, that’s the moment it clicks for him that oh shit, this is what sana was talking about. this is what she has to experience? and that’s why he texts noora, “in the speech for sana, you have to include how insanely strong she is. I don’t think many people understand how much bullshit she has to take” and b. isak’s (bad) advice of “not looking for the racism in things” is ultimately contrasted by yousef (a moc who lived most of his life as a muslim) suggesting instead to show people what islam really is. and that’s so much more meaningful. I think the root of a lot of the issues isak brought up- i.e. ignorance- is a general lack of education, representation, or effort by non-muslim people to seek out information themselves. so sana leading by example and showing what it means to her to be muslim is so much more powerful.]]] -𝒃𝒂𝒎!  -BEST BUDS 🥺
ep8 -haper du har plass weaving in and out of this episode until the chorus finally breaks when the los losers van shows up...... miss julie 😭 -oh my god the pictures. im a fucking MESS bc they’re not only significant to the scene and to sana but also like,, as part of our goodbye to the girls?? -the balloon squad and even :( while the timeline of them reconciling within just this week is kinda wack, seeing even back with his friends looking so happy makes my heart uwu so i’ll allow it just this once -eva’s message to vilde about her and magnus being able to trust each other w/o reading their texts... growth or irony -chris is such a phenomenal friend (and this is why I wanted more of her in s4!!) -sana’s phonecall to the girls breaks my fucking heart bc like. right off the bat she’s finally being vulnerable with them?? telling them about her fears and insecurities and struggles? typing this im gonna start crying lol but god I love her so much. she’s so brave and she put all that on the line bc all she really cares about are her friends, she loves them SO much even if (she thinks) they don’t love her back -lowkey sobbed so hard during the haper du har plass clip I almost threw up and it gave me a headache :)  -anyways this is one of my favourite skam clips and god just. the moment you hear the girls calling for sana??? I LOSE it. when sana just starts BEAMING omg🤧 the girls love sana and support her and if you fuck with sana you fuck with us!!!!!! god. cannot articulate how dear to my heart this scene is. -haper du har plass feels like the end of the episode and the party clip is kinda just tacked on but I love how happy everyone is!! they’re all drinking champagne (who taught isak how to hold things) and dancing and smilingggg 💛 -yousana rise!!!!!!!!  -ok don’t get me wrong I hate william for crashing the party but their entrance slow-mo kinda slaps.... also sana popping up in between noorhelm SENDS me
ep9 -this is the point in the season where the amount of time dedicated to noorhelm is beyond beyond beyond significantly damaging to the story. this is sana’s last episode!! instead of having them makeout in front of william’s car for 20 minutes mayhaps we could’ve had a conversation between the girls and sana, or with her brother (if they had continued the elias alcoholism plotline rip), or maybe even with jamilla or her mamma? like I don’t care at ALL about noora or william. give me anything else. ple a s e -what makes skam scenes so brilliant is their quiet moments!! julie let the scene breathe. not everything needs a tacky song playing over top. -I’ve said this abt like twenty clips now but MAGHRIB. oh my GOD. an absolute masterpiece and definitely tied for my all time favourite skam clip. can’t rlly put into words how stunning it is. & I love sana and yousef’s conversation so much. -“of course I brought food! my name is yousef!” mr. acar you’re the only man I trust
ep10 -as much as my heart yearns for 10 sana episodes I think splitting up the last episode of skam into individual POV clips for different characters was brilliant and such a poignant way to say goodbye :( -okay don’t think about what sana could’ve written in her texts to everyone or ur heart will go sicko mode -I won’t write anything abt this ep since I’ve already written too much but like.. (elias should’ve gotten a clip instead of william. pchris can stay because his clip was funny but he’s on thin fuckin ice) -kjaere sana was such a beautiful way to say goodbye to skam. so yeah. bye skam. i miss you. 
overall ➔I’m not really sure why (possibly a lethal combination of my undying love for sana bakkoush, how much I relate to her, this but my ass was crying EVERY single episode of season 4...... F ➔I’m obsessed with s4′s aesthetic. imo the best editing, soundtrack and cinematography of any season!!!! julie is so talented at making each season feel distinct- to me, sana’s season is cool, vibrant colours (aka the late-night sunset aesthetic- gabie i hear u laughing shut up), crisp electronic/pop music and rap, ethereal city nights..... also sana has the best style of any skam character it had to be said ➔sana’s growth! seeing her open up and be honest and vulnerable with the girls during that phone call. sana sending all of her friends literally the sweetest messages of how much they mean to her and how much she values their relationship. sana being the (MUCH) bigger person and making amends with sara, ingrid etc. I love her so much :’((( ➔I’ve thought a lot about what I would change in season 4 and honestly? im a mf scatterbrain and have no real, structured ideas. my biggest issue is too much noora. dream s4 would be william staying in london and noora being happy on her own (but not rly on her own bc she has the girls and kollektivet!). as :/ as I am about the noora/yousef plotline, I’m not really sure what I’d do to replace the yousana conflict in ep5. maybe involving elias, or the balloon squad and even? related to that- in lieu of all the noora/noorhelm screentime, I would so much rather have a follow-up plot to elias’s drinking problem bc it was kinda just dropped? at the very least, the william clip should’ve been elias’s. I also would've killed for more one-on-one scenes with chris (even vilde or eva!), jamilla, even, members of the balloon squad... there are so many interesting stories that could’ve been explored instead of going down the noorhelm rabbithole again. furthermore, I feel like the social media plot was a bit... weak? again I’ve tried thinking of what I would’ve done instead (while also keeping the haper du har plass clip, y’all can pry that one from my cold dead hands) to little avail. what especially threw me about this plotline is that sana did this in s2 to jamilla, fucked up, and it bit her in the ass. I know that she gets irrational when angry but from a storytelling perspective, it seems repetitive. just.. I feel like there could’ve been a more powerful plot in which sana follows the same character arc. another thing I would’ve loved to see is beyond the los losers van, an apology from the girls to sana. or even just a conversation where they tell her “hey sana, we’re sorry for not paying attention and we’re sorry for being thoughtless/ignorant.” an apology from vilde about things she’s said in the past would’ve been <3. even a gesture! the girls order pizza again but this time it’s halal, or they make an effort to learn about sana’s religion and culture. I know it’s implied through the letter they write for sana, but a final standalone scene would’ve been so nice.  ➔i’ve noticed soo many remakes do this thing where they like.. water down shitty behaviour of their characters. which like- sure. I would love for everyone to be kind and thoughtful and not as horrible as they could be but also... I think that’s the point of skam? to show that people fuck up, but that doesn’t define them as a person. no one is perfect and no one can be thoughtful and considerate and kind all the time. and often these ‘problematic’ actions are integral to the story- e.g. elias saying stupid comments to isak (related to isak’s internalized homophobia and fear of coming out to his friends), the girl squad being ignorant about what sana can eat, etc. so..... your remake is not better because it erased every horrible action every character has done. (nuance.. where r u.........) ➔despite its flaws, I will say- the good moments of season 4? ineffable. I think we sometimes forget that julie literally wrote, directed, and I believe (?) assisted w editing and soundtrack too. i cant imagine doing all that under so much pressure, trying to bring so many storylines to a conclusion whilst simultaneously creating a goodbye-season to a show she put her life into the past two years. I’m so fucking appreciative of her. and you know what? all in all julie wrote some pretty damn beautiful episodes and scenes, and you can tell she loves this show just as much as we do. ➔and honestly this is maybe one reason I’m more wary of watching remake s4′s, bc like.. this season meant SO much bc it was the last season of skam. we knew it was the last season. the final episode is more or less a love letter, a goodbye to the show. whereas w some remakes (do i have to say whomst) its  like.. that love isnt there. it’s just another season. yknow? in conclusion I miss skam so much :(
ok whew if ur reading this ur a champion but also why did you just read 5k of me rambling about how much I love sana bakkoush?? 
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stantcns-blog · 5 years
Text
( i cant find a gif im passing out )
so like.. i have no idea what i’m doin it’s been eight decades since i’ve smelled the air of the tumblr rp world ( we wont discuss my brief love affair with twit rp i think of her like a bad ex. NPDCONSDC ) and charlie is still a work in progress truly so please bear with me.. also english is my second language and i don’t have it in school anymore so if anything is phrased weird pls disregard OCNPSDC oh and i’m naj. let’s dive in my dudes.
charlie is notoriously ambitious and puts everything she has into her modeling career and therefore also prioritizes it over silly (in her opinion) things like love, claiming it’s too time consuming but there’s more to it than that (will get back to this). in regards to modeling, she fell in love with it as a little girl when she would accompany her dad to work ( who is a world famous photographer ). she would be allowed in the dressing rooms and backstage at fashion shows, and started to idolize the models. it seemed like the natural path she was supposed to take, it felt right.
initially, when at the age of 16, charlie worked up the courage to tell her father she wanted to be a model, he was against it. it cut them both deeply, seeing as he had always supported her in anything she did, but his hopes for her were just different. he’d seen how girls were treated in the industry and he didn’t want that to happen to charlie. he knew there was no stopping her when she put her mind to something, but the disappointment in his face is still something charlie will never be able to shake.
although deep down she knows it’s probably futile and that her father will always feel the same way,  she wants to prove she can be the best and that her choice was worth. which is why she works so hard and often forgets to take care of herself as well as she should.
she also developed a love for photography early on but ultimately hides it, seeing as she knows she’ll never live up to her fathers talent and fame in this area, so she’d rather not be in his shadow. posts pictures online anonomously, when she can seem to find the time. 
charlies mother ( a famous model at the time ) died during childbirth, she was mourned deeply but charlie never truly felt the loss because she never knew or met her. her mothers mother stepped in and helped her father raise her, so the motherly figure was always there. she would always hear stories about her mother and idolized the idea of her as a teen, hung up some of her pictures etc. but ultimately she had a loving and kind upbringing with two step-siblings rolling around as she turned 13. she frequently sends them small gifts and letters, but would never tell a soul outside her family that she cares deeply for them.
has always had a knack for winning arguments and discussions, would probably be a lawyer if she hadn’t found passion in the modeling industry. it probably lies in the fact that she wants to stand tall and confident, but has cut corners in the past:
at the age of eighteen, slept with someone to land a really important brand deal that put her on the map, and has led to her massive fame at this point in time. it’s still a complete secret and charlie keeps telling herself it’s no big deal, that it’s just sex. but she truly feels differently and it’s slowly eating at her. she probably also puts everything she has into her work just to not think about it and feel like she has still earned her spot fairly.
in regards to love and relationships, she hasn’t allowed herself to be in one since that happened. she will tell people she just doesn’t like getting caught up with people and forget her work, but really she has begun a path of self-loathing that she cannot get off, and deep down doesn’t believe she’s worthy of it. that she has screwed up too hard to be loved.  
is very consequental and wont stand for bullshit. if you’re not straight up with her, she’ll feel like her time is being wasted and there’s nothing she hates more than having her time wasted. the people who do get close to charlie, will sometimes feel like it’s a battle, seeing as she will continue to push away affection, but a few have managed to crack this shell and get to the core, which is so warm and loving you wouldn’t believe it’s the same person. isn’t mean towards people she hasn’t let in, just keeps them at arms length and doesn’t really give them much to work with in regards to getting closer to her.
IM LIKE.. PASSING OUT NODCPCONDS there’s more to her but this is all i can muster rn and surely gives yall a good idea of her.. idk i always kind of develop my characters on the go so i also don’t wanna lock her in more than this, but if there’s something you want to know more about pls ask i’ll feel out what i think is right for her.. pls plot with me even though i’m basically a born again rp virgin COPNDDNSC
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