#im kinda insane so that checks out
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I havent read nightbringers lore past chapter 13 but im still going to make silly things bc im insane
#obey me#obey me satan#om! luke#obey me luke#om! satan#obey me nightbringer#my art#i love the sillies#reference: a picture of a my little pony dont swear pamphlet that i found on pinterest#it was funny ok and i need to draw so bad i cannot finish ANYTHING!!#if i posted wips would you accept them with your heart and soul :(#ALSO IF YOU DONT KNOW THESE ARE MY NIGHTBRINGER HEADCANONS FOR SATAN AND LUKE (theyre 10 and 6 respectively)#also i cant bring myself to read nightbringers lore#its not bc i think its boring its just i think i get overwhelmed and just immediately switch apps???#im kinda insane so that checks out
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it happens every now and then but it's always such a pleasant surprise when i realize i'm actually rly happy with my art and where i am skill-wise
#hina.txt#i think i mentioned in passing that doing art fr this au has reinvented my art process and completely shifted my style#and i honestly couldnt be happier w it :'>#it reflects in my output too like. i have not skipped a day of drawing since *checks calendar* may 28#which is insane and will never not be insane 2 say out loud#i love u creative high i love u recognizing progress and personal growth#poses and angles that wld have put up a fight a month ago r coming so much easier#same with visual storytelling n body language#knock on wood but i think im starting to Get it ?? my expressions n concepts r slowly getting more and more dynamic and i am. :'D !!!#kinda crazy what a muse can do#like dont get me wrong i never Disliked creating art fr jjk canon#but something abt this au has flipped a switch and i dont feel Stuck like i sometimes wld creating fr canon
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re:hbomberguy, on the topic of citing sources, i want to say:
it is insane how many people on here don't even click the sources op links on their own post to learn more and just hit reblog saying "oh my i didn't know about this thank you for teaching me!". like guys CLICK THE LINK!! CHECK THE NOTES!!! CHECK THE SOURCE!.... i swear half the time the link is dead or takes you to a nonsense page (i see this a lot with art specifically???? and excerpts from magazines??) and some times the linked source disproves a claim the very post that linked it made and people just. don't bother to check, no one bothers to even reblog saying "hey that link is dead! here's a new, working link!" or "hey that link doesn't work, can you link the source again?" and when it comes to misinformation people just share without checking or looking at the notes where numerous people will (in the best case scenario) already be pointing out the misinformation
"OH BUT I CAN'T CHECK EVERYTHING I SEE ON THE INTERNET" there is a surefire way to prevent spreading this kind of stuff even if you don't have the time to fact check immediately. just accept it's fine to save a post for later if you can't look deeper into it right now!!!!! literally just reblog it in private or save the post as a draft so you can come back to it later and check. it won't kill you and in fact it will actually make your life a lot better lol
#hbomberguy#misinformation#plagiarism#adding those for reach honestly because im kinda pissed rn#heres some more on citing sources for this week! sometimes people cite sources and THEY DON'T EXIST. it is REALLY frustrating#people do this to PRETEND they linked to the original artist a lot here on tumblr when theyre actually linking 1- nothing or 2- google imgs#it drives me INSANE#and sometimes they will add “source: xyz magazine” and then you go look for it and there is no available source. its just a loop of-#one person quoting another on where the source came from and none of them actually checked the source#ALSO sometimes journalists will do this kind of crazy bullshit where they quote something from wikipedia thinking the wiki source is real-#and it turns out to not align with the statement in the wiki and so the journalist claims that without checking or sourcing and then#other news sources will quote the journalist on that cyclically up until the point where the journalist that used wikipedia as a source-#becomes a source for wikipedia#'confirming' the statement that actually came from there in the first place#there is a name for this phenomenom but i cant remember it if i find it i'll reblog with an addition#sorry if you saw this before i deleted it to word it better
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hey! I heard on ColorQuest there is a discord server!! how can I get there??? I would really like to chat with other people there and share the memes we made with my friends!
((sorry if there are mistakes here, I used a translator ;3))
I personally do not have a discord server for colorquest, but I have heard of some people with fan made servers! I think I'm actually in one, though I don't use discord enough to be active in it.
I used to have a server, but it's been gone for a couple of years now, I'm pretty sure.
#if it weren't an absolute pain to moderate discord servers maybe I'd have one#but every time i make one it just kinda gets too much to moderate#id like to join other fan servers though if i ever come across them#the one im in i check the art chat once in a blue moon and it's so so cool to see#the fact that theres so much art and fan servers and stuff out there of cq and it's not even like. a fully produced media yet.....#it's so cool & insanely flattering
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ok im editing my desktop themes again but im too tired to finish them up 2night. this post is a reminder to myself to FINISH DOING THAT!!!
#also a reminder to me to check out ppls desktop themes more often bc ohhhh so pretty <3#im like very happy actually w how my main blog looks rn. even tho i rlly dont think many ppl actually use themes anymore#or go to full pages to see them bc of how tumblrs kinda. hid that feature almost?? and its just not on mobile at all#which is u know what can u do. BUT SOME OF THEM LOOK SO PRETTY !!! i want more customization on mobile </3#i would also try to sit down and properly tag all my shit but i have like 22k posts and i am NOT going to go back and tag all of that#that would take. god that would take forever#i mean. ehhh maybe. no. NO. im not doing that thats insane. well no i could watch some movies while doing it#whats that one post. the time will pass anyway. maybe i should.#i need to come up w tags for everything first tho :p#whats a fun general post tag i can use....#.txtii#ooooo i like that one. WE'RE GOING W THAT ONE#ok getting sidetracked heavily. into the schedule u go
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see the problem with all of the puzzles in bg3 is like. sometimes the player (me) is stupid. and at least in a real dnd game you might get the dm to take pity on you
#the number of ‘’walkthroughs’’ that i’ve found that don’t actually. help#they tell you the map coordinates or whatever. what about if i cannot physically find what you’re talking about AT THOSE COORDINATES#or cannot figure out how to get to those coordinates (like when i spent three days trying to find karlach)#i’m in hell. actually still having a very hard time getting invested and like. not rly enjoying this game lmao#I AM PLAYING ON EXPLORER MODE AND SOMEONE GOES DOWN IN ALMOST EVERY COMBAT#also just. open world syndrome a little bit#too many quests that apparently i can’t actually move forward in yet. and too much open space#making me feel like. i need to go explore and grind when i just want to finish the quests i already have good lord#idrc about exploring every corner of the map. at this point???#tried going into the mountain pass and it was like ‘hey you’re really low level. reconsider <3’ and im like#literally WHAT is there to do for me here#(it wanted me to go to the underdark. which i figured would progress the story so i was trying to find lae’zel’s crèche while we’re here??)#also on a non gameplay note#inSANE that all of the questlog items for daughter of darkness list her and i having interactions that We Did Not#got to act 2 and she’s like ‘hey i worship shar btw. this is supposed to be a reveal’ but like. the quest log told me that immediately??#was i not supposed to read that?? she never told me that she wanted to join the justiciars. i never gave her the idol.#but it said all of those happened???#maybe i’m biased bc my first save was trying to play as her but it REALLY feels like they’re pushing her to be the main character#like. kinda sucks how she’s the only companion you can check in with and say ‘how do you think we’re doing’#and these fucking controls#why are the items hit boxes so weird. my cursor is a centimeter away and yet it still highlights something#the label isn’t actually next to the thing it’s describing so holding the alt key does nothing to show me where it is#god forbid you try to point at something through an open door#the fucking. camera angles. impossible to see what i’m doing or where i’m going because the trees and walls and shit keep getting in the way#straight up not having a good time#but this was a lot of money and i’ve heard it picks up#when tho#also the fact that i rly like wyll and he’s got like. nothing. id heard he has less content than other origins but#didn’t realize it was to a noticeable extent#maybe it’ll pick up and give him more to talk about once i save his dad. please god
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#vent post vent post lalalala#i wanted to post some pictures from my weekend trip with my friends before its too late but then i saw my fucking face and now i wanna kms#like oh my god. oh my god this is really truly the face im stuck with forever and ever and ever till the day im fuckin rotting in the groun#incredible how unfair life can be lmao (<- girl who is having such incredibly superficial stupid fucking problems but is otherwise#quite privileged but of course that will never be fucking enough for her because she's soooooo fckn stupid and selfish and annoyinggg lol)#i dont know why im so obsessed with it now#like i genuinely remember KNOWING that im kinda ugly (and fat) in high school and being like 'so what lol idc'#so WHY is it such an issue now?????#idk. i just kinda wish i was dead every time i look at my face and realise there's nothing i can do to change it#i can dress in ways that will cover my ugly ass shapeless body. maybe i can even go back to my ed properly this time#and lose some weight. for a time. before i gain back twice as much and the circle begins anew lol#but my face is not gonna change no matter what i do lmao unless i fucking scrape it off with a grater or smash my head into pieces#and like. even if i do get that rhinoplasty (its not gonna change my faceshape anyway. nothing i can do to fix THAT fuckin atrocity)#every time ill look in the mirror i will only be reminded that its fake. and that my natural face was disgusting enough it had to be cut up#to be fixed somewhat.#i just wish i had ONE. just ONE nice thing about my body. literally just one its not even funny lol#and its so fucked up when you look at my mom who was so insanely fucking beautiful when she was my age. like. i cant blame her#cause how could she have known that the genes she'll pass on will not result in anything good lol but also i feel like such a failure#like its not really my fault i got the genes i got. but yknow.#anyway im tired of always being the ugliest person in any group im hanging out with. my cousins? check. my hometown friends? check.#my uni friends? my GOD check (how ARE they all so pretty and skinny??? insane).#god i wish i were dead. like fr fr. im not actively suicidal since i cant bring myself to *do* shit anyway. but i just wish i never existed
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bot is the perfect embodiment of s3 bevause I have so many swaying thoughts on the entire. WUHHUH WUAH..W,W..
#IDK BRO!!!! parental instincts arc yeah but cabby literally was a big part of the reason bot questioned the things You did to them so#‘cold in a way that I used to be/I feel sorry for her’ IS A LINE I WOULDVE GONE CRAZY FOR#IF IT WERENT FOR#IDK I THINK YOU WERE A BIT WORSE WHEN CREATING A FACSIMILE driven by emotional attachment Yes but but BUT#LIKE YOURE STILL KINDA DOING COLD THINGS DUE TO YOUR APPROACH TO PROBLEMS SS AND IT MESSED UP A REAL PERSONS WHOLE BRAIN#cabby last time i checked did Not#NOT PITTING THEM AGAINST EACH OTHER thye are my two favourites I just UAAQGHHH THIS WOULD BE SO GOOD#FOR NARRATIVE but I just don’t see the bot plotline the way it’s. being talked about / resolved#IM TAKING IT VERY SERIOUSLY I THOUGHT IT WAS. COOOLLLL THAT TT AND FAN REPEATED THEIR MISTAKE BUT A LOT WORSE BECAUSE THEY CARE ABT#EACH OTHER SO MUCH like LKKE THATS A WIN THATS. COOL TO EXPLORE#and how that made both of them stronger and capable of doing things cabby couldn’t imagine (power of friendrship etc)#but like strong enough to do something super Bad too especially while getting emotional about it#like so bad that cabby’s cold approach to finding out what’s upwith bot. was justified because SOMETHING RLY BAD WAS UP!!!#UMMM IDK IDK what does the class think Dot dot (insane about it#pdl#jic
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hcs on the brain
#thinking about my trans holic hcs again#some of them are just kinda random but im VERY firmly in trans woman yuuko trans guy shizuka and nb tanuki#the shizuka hc is cause it just kinda checks out with his lore kinda like scara/ryo to an extent but also he just radiates trans energy#also rou isnt real if i manifest hard enough#yuuko is just *points at her* you think someone that serves that hard is cis????#also this is neither here nor there but i simply do not see the modern holic art where yuuko is like 5foot#this isnt relevant rly i just remembered it and got pressed again shes the tallest woman of all time dont lie to me#anyway she gives off vibes#tanuki is just 'youre a fav i relate to a lot so you get to wear the non binary hat '#but also thats a lie cause he gives MAD repressed energy repression is his entire THING#his gender expression is really fucking interesting and also just fun and even without the trauma hed probably be at least gnc#and its a KNOWN FACT that he shoves all his feelings deep down and refuses to address them or addresses them way after the fact#we've seen how he shoves down his feelings whos to say hes not pulled a me as a teenager move and shoved down feelings of gender stuff#it makes sense to me that with all his character writing and development in canon he'd be the EXACT kind of perspn to be a late bloomer#idk i was so a lot of that comes from personal experience#but this repressed mf is packed to the brim w gender#his gender is ?? and nothing and idk and drunk girl crying in bathroom to sunmi music and gay and#his gender is basically the xxx placeholder in xxxholic like its just kinda ___insert word here___#im insane but my brain is huge
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🎶✨when u get this, list 5 songs u like to listen to, publish. then, send this ask to 10 of your favorite followers (positivity is cool)🎶✨
I GAVE YOU SOME OF MY FYOLAI SONGS!
#i literally have so much to explain!#ok first of all love me normally is like a perfect fit for them?? its like i want to love someone but i dont understand the normal way-#of LOVING someone so its kinda insane#harvey is says it all in the lyrics#“harvey nobody knows what i see” “nobody knows im waiting for you to call”#FLUFFY FYOLAI REAL#one lyric from place in the world reminds me of them#the “you and i we're just fighting for our place in the world”#HONESTLY THE LYRICS REMIND ME OF THEM A LOT NOT JUST THAT#favorite poison is just amazing#it gives band au fyolai#(please go check out soupyhand's band au fyolai its amazing)#LASTLY PITY PARTY!#one lyric. just one.#“the world might end tonight i wont be by your side and if the world ends tonight i won't be by your side”#hope you like em!
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#ok so like this is fine bc im not in a horrible mood rn. this is more i feel like complaining bc what im doing is kinda ridiculous#but my memory is so bad that ill probably forget if i dont write it out. but basically 4 days a week i have to come in starting at 7.30 to#water and prep for measurements. then from 9am to 6.15pm i have to nonstop take the measurements. and theyre timed so that means#i get abt 4 min to do anything before i have to take another measurement. which is abt enough time to start to focus and then have to stop#which is very fucking frustrating. and i have to manage data. coordinate for this fucking paper. and keep track of like 10 other things for#work stuff. which means that it takes me like and hour to send easy emails and they come out all fucked uo bc my brain is so shot#but on top of that i also have to fucking do the steps to get set up for my new school in the fall. and like ive officially accepted the#offer but havent talked to my new advisor since then so now theres this weird gap where im like. uh fuck do i ask for wtf im supposed to#do? bc ive been able to do things for like 2 or 3 weeks but then my life started collapsing in around me. and like there r probably#instructions somewhere but i cant fucking read lol. whatever. hes nice i just need to find the energy and words to email him and b like lol#srry everythings been insane. but bc ive waited so long i have to compulsively keep going back to check that ive been accepted like somehow#that would change while im not looking. ugh. and ive also fucked myself over housing wise bc theres a housing shortage in the city and huge#demand of housing on camus so theres a wait list for everything but i cant fucking apply bc i cant get my id to work. and fucking idk who#to call or email abt that. but idk i might have to have roomates for a semester. or my parents offered to give me some extra money for an#apartment until i can get one that doesnt put me in the red on a grad student budget. ugh. i dont wanna do either of those things#but christ do i not want roommates. ill figure something out. its just annoying and difficult from so far away#and it makes me kinda sad bc ppl r like: r u excited?! and im like. i cant really think abt that. partly bc im constanly putting out fires#in the present so theres not really space for it. partly bc i dont allow myself to b excited abt things so as not to get my hopes up.#but just after i accepted i was excited. and now it feels like im reaching my hand out toward a floating light just out of reach. like#its a nice idea but i wont believe until it happens. but that just bc ive become distorted about things#and i dont even get a weekend bc the 4 days of measurement r friday to Monday and i cant fucking relax on weekdays bc ppl r like hey can u#do this??? and there r things i can only do on weekdays so its like ok i guess ill just suffer forever thrn. and my boss texts me like: hey#did u do X? and am like: uuuuuh i fucking dont kno what day it is anymore. i dont understand y we have to meet. lets just not talk bc im#afraid ill say something worrying. so yea its pretty fucked up rn. but this stuff ends on the 24th#then ill probably not take a break and fucking finish the measurements for another project bc i just really need it to b done. i need it#all to b done so i can fucking wash my hands of this and fucking quit and move away at the start of july... or August if i decide i hate#myself that much. ugh. at least the lab has been pretty empty so no ones seen me crying lol#also thr fucking rutgers guy emailed me yesterday like: hey u want this position? and im like bitch u r like a month too late also im in#my cringe fail era. i would not survive at ur school. ugh everything is terrible. 2 or 3 more months then i csn leave this place forever#unrelated
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im so emotional i can hardly think straight (listened to 1 song and thought of sans for 1 second)
#cherry chats#as in. the song makes me thyink of him. and. and. the song alreaddy makes me unbearably emotional as is#DONT ASK WHAT SONG IT IS ITS EMBARRASSING AND KINDA PRETENTIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!! but its actually affecting me so profoundly#its. its. its. you jnow#also if youre wondering why im making so many typos. my phone screen broke and i can hardly see anything so i canr really check the words i#write on this stupid thing ….. -_-#so an.yway. i have so many frelings about this one song that i interpret as a love song for essentially no reason except im insane#and. it makes me think if sans. for a multitude of reasons. and i can feel my heart trying to claw its way out of my chest#also im going to bed i cant afford to stay up any longer cus i hce school tomorrow. bye ( __ __ ;)
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weird tarot reading just now. i got the fool reversed for the "future" card. idk what to make of that. but i got the 5 of wands reversed for the "present" card, which checks out tbh.
#and 2 of pentacles reversed for the 'past' card. but im not surprised at that one because i got that card a while back as one of my future#cards so it checks out that it would be in my past now?#kinda crazy tho. i shuffle insanely well too so its wild to have got these cards.#also my first major arcana drawing since i started readings? so yeahh#and all reversed. hmm.#dove talks#tarot
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hello may i interest you in some good shit that slaps genuinely and for real 😃 case 143 by stray kids . the mv is fun too 🫶
#im so serious btw this is gen good#their whole new album fucks in a way that surprised me like it is a no skip album no cap .#first one for me of them btw like even my favorite album of them i skip songs of#but this one.#its just so good#they're insane#if u enjoy funky music i cant rec them enough#i cant rlly explain their genre (hell they pioneered their own fucking genre) but its safe to say they're unexpected & just fucking fun.#anyway#sorry for the rant#i was one of those ppl who didnt fuck w kp0p (still kinda dont) music wise & was prompt to dimiss it#but these mfs completed blew my expectations away & now i just want more ppl to check them out not bc i like them as a group but#bc i just wanna share their music bc its that good to me yknow what i mean im sharing bc i like the music not bc i stan them lmao#im overexplaning Sorry i have unresolved Issues about talkjng about kp0p out in the open like this. GoodBye Now. Stream Maxident#o.txt
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people should start inventing their own numerologies and comparing notes. slash s r s
#slovo talks#otherwise i will not tag this because frankly what do i say#numerology#? im not insane /lie#yes yes im not insane. im just autistic which is Normal. anyway the number 4 is our lucky one atm because its everywhere and it means death#in japan or somewhere#i like death. i want to court it so when it comes for my ass again i can bat my lash all gross like and it freaks out and leaves#or fucks me. and leaves. like a bad husband#this because im deranged. i like it this way#did u know im ukrainian btw ? did u know ukraine is a meltin pot of Yikes. did u know i love this land and its people#did u know i wont stay here under threat of death. anyway even numbers are the only correct numbers an 5 is the only one that passes#the vibe check#otherwise#i like the number five. number seventeen is a funny one because it is TWO uneven numbers. the most problematic uneven numbers at that#but seven adds up to 14 which makes it kinda sexy#OH did u know imagination an creativity are muscles u can train ? thank u professor vujadinovic#i love u mr old man who is old enough to be my granfather. why are u montenegrin. u should stop#im fairly sure he doesnt have tumblr. hes Old. but hes hip with the kids on account of hes a teacher so ig we never know ! hi professor#im sorry i was Weird and Unwell and Scary. and very worrying indeed. this is because i am multiple and the multiple never fuckin agree on#NOTHING.#for fun#also im just a baby so its okay for me to be worryin actually cause im young an adaptable an will figure it out. bats lashes in Irradiated#that one is for our first ex instead of our montenegro-based prof. i think i need to sleep cause this is not numerology anymore#oh well !#bye bye#im gon be busy reviving old gods- OH MY GOD I FORGOT- yeah bye we have Business to attend to suddenly
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i want to do laundry with my friends so bad its not even funny
#gabbering#holy fuck#unrelated but i finished reading how do we relationship and#it is genuinely the first romance ive read that actually fucking got me. its so so so so so so so good#im not naming names cuz i dont want to spoil it but the sex that isnt sex made me so fucking happy#their relationship is so so cute its insane!!!!!! and i like never like that kinda stuff#anyway go check it out!!! its rlly good
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