#im pretty close to making them nonbinary at this point

[pain-is-too-tired]

More divorced Leeluke thoughts

Some time Post Luke's betrayal Lee doesn't get much sleep.

Partly due to staying in the infirmary to keep an eye on Percy's vitals why he's still recovering from the scorpion sting, and partly because his mind won't settle.

He's felt like he's been stabbed in the chest, rush of emotions hit him at once.

Most people don't notice how much it effected him of course, except for Michael who's constantly trying to get his older brother to rest. He didn't know Luke long, but seeing how hurt his brother was made him furious. An anger he kept(and was aspirated by Lee's later death) until the end of the war.

Lee put all his energy into camp afterwards. He became defensive over the Stolls and was completely hard broken when Chris left. Though he wasn't as angry at the kid, knowing how close Chris had been to Luke he was expected, but it still hurt.

Any time anyone tried to say anything about the Stolls or the Hermes cabin, Lee did not take it, chewing anyone who said a thing out.

They became the main big brother figure in camp. He did a lot more for keeping kids from joining the Titans then Chiron let's be honest, he knew where they came from. But it also was able to remind them that the Titans were just a earlier link in the chain that was the mess of Immortals.

He took care of camp, and showed most new kids around, and helped them find a place. Why Luke tended to fuel their bitterness towards the gods, Lee fueled their independence. They didn't need the gods approval to be something great. To be loved.

Lot of that stimmed from his childhood. His mortal parent wasn't a cruel parent. But they were desperate for love. Lee's stepfather was a manipulative type. Seemed kind on the surface, but had to get his way. He was always right, and he's make you feel bad if you weren't. A self centered man that drained Lee to live with. Lee's stepfather's love was conditional, but Lee learned to make his own rules to be loved. He took control of his own life and love and kept that when he got to camp.

If Apollo wanted their love, he'd have to love in return.

So,in reality it scared Lee after Luke's betrayal. That fear that he was just like their mother, found love in someone who didn't really scare to put equal work into the relationship like they did.

Of course Luke did love Lee, even if he doesn't realize how much until after he left. But by then it was much too late. Luke tried multiple times to get Lee on his side, but he was rejected each time. Even kicked in the crotch once. Really he was lucky he didn't get a arrow between the eyes. Lee was pissed. And Luke was much too wrapped up in his own emotions to understand why.

To Lee he had started to feel like all those years working together and supporting eachother wasn't anything to Luke. Those sleepless nights Lee spent trying to help Luke heal from his past. Those nights they spent trying to get Luke to focus on the love he had now, not the one Luke craved. Those days that Lee had Luke rest why he took over his duties as he knew he had a lot on his place with the Hermes cabin. Even if the Apollo cabin was almost as big. Those nights after Luke came back from his quest, that they sat why Lee cleaned and tended to his stitches in his face. They felt those were all just passing time to Luke.

Part of them blamed himself, he felt like a kid again, asking if he really didn't love enough that those around him were desperate enough to latch into unhealthy relationships instead.

But they had to remind themselves that Luke made his own decision. They gave their all to love Luke, he chose Kronos on his own accord. Lee couldn't put that on themselves.

Luke despite all his despite attempts to get Lee back to him, already ruined his chances. He fumbled bad.

Luke questioned himself. Plenty of times. But Luke feared death. He feared not being remembered like the heroes before. He idolized those stories even if he didn't realize it.

Lee? He feared no death if it was for those he loved. He stared the Drakon right in the eyes, and he used his fear to keep going.

Luke's fear lost him his body and Lee.

Lee's willingness to face his head on left to those he cared about fighting another day.

Luke never could get Lee back. Even if he lived. Especially if as many Apollo kids died in the way they did in canon. No matter how much he loves him and tells him he does. Luke should know just how little promises of love matter when actions prove other wise.

[angelmarymae]

“Please ask me anything Yellowjackets related”

Oh, you may regret that, as a hyperfixated fan who desperately needs someone to yap with:

Hi! I’m lin, I like Yellowjackets a lot, and your post popped up on my dash so now im here!! Feel free to answer all of these or none of these, no pressure to respond:

1) who r ur favorite teen timeline characters? adult timeline characters?

2) opinions on Shauna. because, well. it’s Shauna.

3) opinions on LottieNat vs MistyNat vs TravNat— I’ve seen an equal amount of each and im curious lmao

4) opinion on transfem / nonbinary Travis? Popular headcanon I’ve seen and I love the thought of ‘the shrooms made him gay’

5) what’s a story / plot line that you wish they did more with?

6) favorite / least favorite character death ?

Again you don’t have to answer any of these but I’m a chronic yapper and the hyperfixation is hyperfixating and in my defense, you said to ask.

sorry for rambling, but not enough to not send this. Hope you’re having a great day, random person

- Lin

<3

Linnn thank you for your questions and don’t apologize for rambling! We’re in the same funky hyperfixation boat, so you can imagine how thrilled I was to wake up to so many questions in my inbox!!

Let’s get into it :p

1. Fav characters (teen/adult timeline)

For the teen timeline, I’ve said it before: it’s Lottie. Always my perfect angel, my complex girl with a tiny disorder, my cutesy axe murderer. On a serious note, I love her character on so many levels, and Courtney is so incredibly talented. My love for her only grew in S3—oh dear…

Also, a close favorite is definitely Mari (what a shame).

Now for the adult timeline… that’s a little tricky. My gut instinct is to go with Misty, because let’s be real, she’s carrying the story, both with her comedy and her genius. My girl is singlehandedly moving the plot forward … Her development is amazing to watch 2.

However, I really really enjoyed adult Taissa in season 1, back when she still had the politician/divorce era going on. And I could never forget Van. She adds so much to the adult timeline. I think making her a survivor is one of the best things the writers ever did tbh. While I do have some criticisms about her storyline, I’m actually in love with Lauren, so I won’t say any more.

2. Opinion on Shauna

I meaaaan. Oh man. I really can’t defend her anymore… but I still love her. Could never hate her. At this point she could kill all the girls in cold blood and I’d be like…. Remember when she literally looked at us and asked why we couldn’t hear her baby cry? Yeah, that’ll do it for me every time.

She’s traumatized, probably deep in PPD that maybe never left. She really gets on my nerves in the adult timeline specifically, but hey. Could never forget what happened to her. She’s also super interesting from a character standpoint!

3. LottieNat vs MistyNat vs TravNat

Oh Natalie, my lovable, shippable baby.

I’ll be quick with this:

LottieNat – Surprisingly, I’m not really into it. Maybe in the adult timeline, but meh. (sorry majority of the fandom)

MistyNat – Good, good soup. Adult timeline, season 1, really confirmed this for me. So much potential.

TravNat – Yes. Their relationship makes me cry. Teen timeline has so much angst for them, which I eat up. They truly deserve each other.

4. Transfem/nb Travis

“The shrooms made him gay” I’m crying.

I mean, hey.. everyone can headcanon what they want. I don’t really see it, simply because I think his masculinity was such a big part of his plotline.

However, he is a pretty princess, so please go ahead.

5. Storyline/plot point I wish was explored more

Pff, sadly there are a lot, and S3 just made it worse. But I’m gonna go with my favorite and I think the fandom agrees:

Taissa’s entire storyline.

I’ve been rewatching with my sister, and it hit me again how amazing her setup was in season 1. She was truly my favorite to watch. She had all these things going for her: the senator plot, sleepwalking, creepy sacrifices, divorce era, and Sammy. They really set it all up and then… well, they just made her revolve around Van.

I was happy to see she was still leaning into the “sacrifice for Van” thing in season 3, but mhhhhh Other Tai was handled so poorly. That scene where she talks to Other Tai? It was so corny when it could’ve been so interesting 😭

6. Favorite/least favorite death

Okay. Least favorite, this one’s widely agreed on, Lottie and Nat.

The adult timeline deaths were really, really weak. Both characters had so much more to offer, and it was a huge mistake to write off these insanely talented actresses.

Natalie’s death felt so meaningless. like, an accident?? A fucking overdose?? That’s actually sick.

And Lottie… it felt like they only killed her off so the other adults had something to do. The reactions were lacking, and while Callie being her murderer was a good idea, the scene should’ve been way longer. At least Lottie seemed at peace in the end. My poor Angel.

Now maybe this contradicts everything I’ve ever said, but my favorite death as of late is Van’s. Not because I wanted her to die, obviously, but because the scene was so aesthetically perfect and just… ugh.. it fit.

Yes, Van would get stabbed and bleed out slowly on the floor after saving the love of her life and a friend, because she couldn’t kill Melissa while Radiohead plays.

Of course Van would survive the plane crash, fire, wolves, possibly cancer—and die because she’s too kind.

I’ve been meaning to talk about her plane scene too!! So much to analyze..

(Yellowjackets, release the monologue before Tai eats her heart, omg.)

Okay, that’s it! I took my time with this and had so much fun answering the questions!!!

Could talk about Yellowjackets for hours—but hey, didn’t wanna annoy anyone reading all this and tried to stay on topic lmao.

Feel free to add your own thoughts. Thanks again, Lin <3

[maria-ruta]

Im back!!

Here was the link!

https://www.tumblr.com/sadwrncupid/762924626225528832/vtm-oc-ask-game-hello-ive-decided-to-make-a?source=share

3,5,6 and 49!

Thank you very much for sharing(op changed username so the ask game is now here) and for your asks!

Let's all dive into some of the Veronica's backstory!

And thank you for your patience hahaha, here are my answers:

3. Are they more “traditional” or do they break barriers?

no she isnt much of either traditional vampire nor toreador...

she is very humane and she likes people and she goes along with the technology update and people's fashion/habbits changes

she kinda looks pretty much typical for toreador but she isnt as full of herself and high art/high society as you'd expect typical toreador to be...

here i made little chart that i found for her

she actually never was accepted kindly by most of toreador clan in the city, she was embrased in (Chicago), halfly bc her Sire waslone wolf among toreadors, halfly bc she herself didn't fit their standarts and she didn't like their mean attitude

and after that and so on she kind of didn't get to join any other toreador group from other cities too

she has lots of friends and allies from different clans though! lots of gangrels and brujas among them for some reason XD

she also has friends in camarilia and anarchs, been there and there too, kind of playing in both feilds i guess

5. Who is their sire?

William Moore (he/him lesbian) in the past, changed to nowdays Kellen Moore (they/them nonbinary)

they used to be harpy of Chicago, they were looking after masqarade maintenance and getting rid of witnesses etc

you can read more about them if you go through my older posts, tagged as "moore"

6. What was their relationship to their sire? Were they close in any way or mere strangers?

First Veronica didn't like him much bc he dragged her into hell of being vampire, but overtime she grown softer and softer to him

then they became a couple, you could say they were close yeah... 😏

Veronica's humanity went lower from becoming vampire and learning how to hunt and be vampire and such, but over time when she learned that she wants to still know and understand humans well, her humanity went back up

Veronica and William were together for few dacades, untill the incedent around 60s

the incedent was when Veronica charmed some dude to feed on him in his apartment (charming humans for food didn't count as cheating for Veronica and William, as long as it is not long term relationship), and she drank his blood but he didn't forget as much, and whats worse, he turned out to be conspiracy and monsters entusiast, and he realized she is a vampire and he was so excited and over his head about it and wanted to call his friends entusiasts, Veronica panicked and didn't know what else to do but bite him again and drank him out to death

scared and shocked from what she did she called William to come and help clean this mess (especially since its his feild of expertese). William and his two ghouls arrived(he has old gay couple as ghouls btw... well they look young-ish but in modern days they are pretty old...) ghouls were cleaning the evidance and getting rid of the body, while William was trying to calm Veronica down and support her, bc she was pretty psyched that she killed an inocent man

William tried to convince her that she did the right thing, that saving the masqarade was more important, Veronica was still hysterical and said something about that it is easy for him to say, considering how many people he killed after embracing her (more of that here). William never told her about it but she found out herself... He said "I did this for you" and she answered "no. you did it for yourself." anddd... that was a break point in their relationship, they broke up

Both were mad at each other for a while

Veronica couldnt find a porpose for herself and was drowning into apathy and depression and was just slouching about for some time, then she met a group of anarchs who were passing by and stayed in the city for couple of days. One of them flirted with her, they talked a bit and he jokingly offered her to join them, she said she needs to think about it, and next night she really decided to put everything behind and run away with anarchs bc she was sick of camarilia anyway, and so she did

her Sir sure did get in some trouble for the fact that his childie joined anarchs, he was partly upset but partly thinking that maybe it is for the better, and considering if it wasn't fair to hold her on the leesh

after some traveling and more life experience Veronica still was thinking about William and experience that she had, and at some point she decided to write him a letter, to ask how is he doing and confess that now, after time passed she understands that he was partly right on that horrible night, about saving masqarade and all that, tho she wishes she could find a better way to resolve the situation back then etc

and so they slowly started talking again, little by little fixing their relationship into friendly

later on in 80s William helps her rejoin camarilia, when she asked for shalter from sabat in New Orleans. William called toreodor premogen of New Orleans - Adzone, and asked him if he'd accept Veronica in the city. After looking at Veronica up and down Adzone smiled and confirmed to other heads of New Orleans that she's worthy of joining (who know what he saw, or what thought he read! he is an ancient ass vampire who diablored A LOT of vampires in his past c: )

in 90s after apocalipsis almost happened, Veronica felt especially need to go see people she loves, so she visited Moore in Chicago - at this point after almost the end of the world, he quit his harpy job and was having existential crisis. They caought up pretty well (but only as friends) and Veronica brought them a gift - a computer! she started teaching them how to use it and convinced them that using new technologies is a great thing, also introduced them to some new gender terms she learned from newer generations of people

nowdays they are still friends and chat online more or less frequently

Veronica still feels romantic longing for her Sire, but she thinks that it is her bloodbound, and she is always conflicted about her feelings towards them, bc she doesnt like the thought of blodbound dictating her emotions and feelings and she worries about it not being sincere

She doesn't know that her bloodbound is gone long ago. she just still has aching heart for them, and probably alwyas will, but oh well 🤷‍♀️

49. Detail your OC’s backstory!

like... like ALL OF IT???? oh for fucks sake thats A LOT X'D

ok maybe someday I will do some major Veronica's backstory post, will put all the previous posts together or something, and add drawings idk...

but that day is not today ahahah.....

maybe if i do it in drafts slowly, little part each day, ill be able to, maybe... wait for the updates, i guess X)

[my-castles-crumbling]

I kinda realized today that im in love with my best friend. Nothing special happened with her today i was just thinking about her as i often do and it dawned on me that the only other person ive thought about the way i think about her was a guy that i dated a couple years ago. Honestly im not super surprised, i feel like ive known for a while, but just not admitted it to myself. Im not gonna tell her or do anything about it. Because my family is super homophobic and im nonbinary and bi, but not out to them. And it would have to be a secret from them and thats not fair to her because at least her immediate family is accepting. (Shes lesbian) And we are in highschool so family isnt something you can just kind of avoid. I just wanted to tell someone because if i tell any of my friends they'll meddle and i really dont want things to change. I dont want to complicate things with her, i just want us to continue to exist like we do. Plus im planning to move out of the country after we graduate and she is staying here, and moving away isnt something im willing to comprimise on and its unfair to ask her to give up everythng and learn a new language for me so there really is no point in even trying to start a relationship. Anyways i just wanted to say that shes so pretty and i love listening to her talk about literally anything. Me and her are going to a movie friday and im super excited to hear everything she got for christmas cause she sent me a few texts about stuff and i know shes excited. And yeah thanks for listening to me talk about this for a bit. I love her so much but i cant ask of her what being with me would take and hopefully ill get over it and she will find someone that doesnt require so much from her. Someday i hope just being her friend will be enough for me cause i feel like i wanna cry knowing that if she does like me back we cant be anything.

Anyways thank you for listening, i really needed to tell someone cause i want so much with her and i cant have it. Because she deserves the world and i cant give it to her. I cant even give her a piece of it. I know being friends can be enough because id rather be something than nothing but still, sometimes its so hard.

Hi hon <3

I'm so sorry it feels like the timing isn't right for you and your friend <3 Part of me really thinks you're making the right move because it's so kind and mature, and part of me is like...but what if she would want to try to make it work? I don't know I guess I'm a bit of a hopeless romantic (behind a lot of trauma lol) but I guess just remember that sometimes work out differently than you think. Certainly don't wait around for things to change, but also don't close yourself off, either.

[strawberriesshi]

fuck it. enstars gender/sexuality headcanons (and some others) for fun. long post so under cut

eichi - sick ill cis gay man both mentally and physically wataru - whatever's funniest or suits the role he's playing tori - i could not tell u honestly if hes just gnc cis or transfem. shes just silly mean rich. yuzuru - not straight but he has to be tori's butler so its not important to him rn

hokuto - "dressed as a girl to disguise himself as a kid" yeah right happyele thats a trans autistic gay theatre boy subaru - cis and pan, adhd probably makoto - somewhere on the arospec me thinks. also autism mao - transfem mao is real to me idc once she stops overworking and has free time that egg's exploding tetora - trans male. manliest man of them all and we love him for it. t lets go. bi probably. midori - shes transfem like girl why u hate getting tall so much...also autistic as all hell shinobu - cis, he's unlabelled with his sexuality but its not that important to him rn and guess what autism to u too chiaki - cis pan guy, though he wont really care if u get his gender wrong kanata - fish more important than gender or sexuality. hes kanata. hiiro - transmasc, but also i do fw the transfem hiiro headcanons. i think he's aroace too actually. also autistic as all hell aira - if uve ever known me u know im the no.1 trans girl aira truther. she's so fucking ASEDRFVBNILJ and also shes bi and because im autistic shes autistic :3 mayoi - gender and sexuality is an enigma to both me and themself tatsumi - used to be cis tatsumi but saw a really good transfem tatsumi fic and now i cant see her as cis. i think hes amab but is somewhere in gender soup hell

nagisa - aroace, agenders, autistic, its racking up the a's hiyori - annoying gnc cisgender gay, like SLAYYYYYY characters, will be a girl if feeling silly ibara - estrogen could def fix this trans woman jun - he likes men for sure. cis or transmasc either works. shu - transfem nonbinary shu lets gooooooo. i dont think she'd label her sexuality, though i def think shes demiromantic mika - transmasc but like. in a he/they girly way if it makes sense? he loves girly things and feminine stuff but like, doesnt wanna be one yknow? also lesbian

hinata - bigender. i mean come on she already switches up her gender in canon when its funny yuuta - nonbinary gay fr!! growing out their hair did things. also i think itd be funny if hinata had adhd and yuuta had autism for adhd vs autism twins

rinne - annoying ass gay ass FA- himeru - dumbass tried to identity theft without realising theyve gotta be a man when theyre agender kohaku: yeah u already know what im abt to say. transfem lesbian kohaku. nikki: could not tell u abt the gender honestly but hes gay with horrible tastes in men (rinne) rei - nonbinary transfem they/she vampire bitch. lesbian prob. like to think she was a lot more confident in herself pre-war and those close to them helped them to regain that confidence post-war kaoru - girl why u hate men so much if ur not a trans girl. come on u look like a girl in canon. ur a lesbian in denial. well at least in ! era she comes out some point in !! era and transitions confident in herself :3 koga - i cant tell you if hes cis, transmasc and dont even get me started on sexuality all i know is that he likes men and is a furry adonis - i think he's unlabelled with both sexuality and gender, he doesnt care all that much and we love him for it tomoya - obvious cis gay who says hes cishet what else is new nazuna - transmasc :D ex valk's gender is fucked. likes guys prob mitsuru - i could not tell you his, he likes bread and probably all genders hajime - gnc cis fr! a pretty pansexual too :3 keito - pathetic cisboy gay kuro - hes also cisboy gay but not at all pathetic souma - cis but gnc, he embraces his feminine side and we love it. probably unlabelled with sexuality hes got more important things tsukasa - amab who drank the genderfluid but is too stupid to realise it. also autistic as SHIT leo - whats up with knights' kings and being genderfluid because this guy is too. also lesbian and has adhd izumi - she is transfem idc will die on this hill transfem sena is always on the mind its crazy. i think shes lesbian btw or at least chooses to label her sexuality that way ritsu - bigender as fuck. unlabelled with sexuality she'll like whatever maa-kun identifies as. arashi - we all know it, canon trans girl bi <3

natsume - afab but is now transmasc agender. cool with anything BUT she/her it will riot against u. tsumugi - cisboy awful and pathetic gay sora - hes sora and thats all thats important to him, autism too btw madara - i dont think he'd label anything abt himself hes just mama and we love him esu - i think hes cis gnc. sexuality hes still figuring out rn kanna - hes 12 he can figure it out later yume - yeah yume is transfem we all knew it our bitchy lil princess :3 raika - sewer rat whos probably questioning their gender and sexuality. likes women though. ibuki - nonbinary (tm), probably like men Jin - beer enjoying gay, cross dresses if funny Akiomi - in denial abt being gay since fucking modelling days Seiya - id cishet jumpscare but hes also lowkey having a gay affair with the younger hotter nice Nice - speak of the devil, gay Gatekeeper - gay freak Anzu - aroace transfem <3

[emeritus-fuckers]

Howdy hey I'm interested in trying the match-up event. I always enjoy reading the things y'all've written.

Apologies in advance if this is a mess. 1. Identity: I am nonbinary, use they/them and she/her pronouns. I'm bisexual and a bit on the demisexual side.

2. Who I like: I'm cool with either the papas or ghouls

3. What I look like: I'm 5'8" and chubby. I'm pretty strong and got some muscle so I'm built perfect for giving big hugs and cuddles (though it'll take a bit of convincing to get me cuddly). At the moment my hair is dyed bright red but it changes colors often. Both my eyes have sectoral heterochromia and are green with a bright blue chunk. I usually wear all black graphic tees, skinny jeans, boots, and fun colored socks that often show because i never find pants that are long enough in my size lol.

4. My personality: I am introverted but enjoy being around others even if it wears me out. I'm good with kids (I'm a human jungle gym at this point) and people tend to tell me their secrets and find it easy to be open/themselves around me. I'd say i'm pretty smart but I will do stupid things just because i'm curious. Folks i'm comfortable around will never hear the end of my current interests and I'm a complete goofball (I've been banned from being funny at the table because i've caused too many people to choke laughing oops). It takes a while to actually get to know me deeply because I keep things close to my chest and dont open up easily. I've got a lot of anxiety and some baggage that I keep hidden but I'm working on I swear. I can get really competitive over trivial things and can turn anything into a game. I sometimes go MIA when im distracted with whatever the hell i'm into at that time but when I reappear there's always something new to share. (I can tell you everything you never wanted to know about pipe organs!)

5. Interests: I've got the adhd so my interests bounce around a lot. I like making things and I mess around with a lot with different crafts. I do a lot of fiber arts stuff and I've also recently been whittling bears (I have a few around somewhere). I love music both listening and playing it. I play 8 instruments (violin, viola, cello, mandolin, ukulele, trumpet, trombone, and french horn) but I'm best with the violin because i've been playing it for around 17 years. I'm also teaching myself accordion and guitar. I play video games sometimes and I especially enjoy getting 100% completion. In general I love learning anything and everything and am a "jack of many trades but master of none"

6.Trivia: My favorite movie is fantasia 2000 and recently I completed my goal of performing every music piece in an orchestra (The Pines of Rome and the Firebird Suite are my favs). I collect knickknacks and random things I find and use them to decorate my spaces and I have a skeleton with a mustache in a wizard costume in the back seat of my car and its name is Todd. I also keep googly eyes in my bag just in case

This post is part of the 1000 followers match up event. Entries for the event are now closed.

Your match is...Swiss

You and Swiss quickly became friends, he's so excited by things and so enthusiastic that you got swept up in it all. He's charming and really sweet to you, so you started to fall for him. One day you were sitting outside, Swiss taking a large drag of his vape before he looks at you and grins. "I love ya, you know that right gorgeous one?" You blush and blurt out that you feel the same way. Swiss responds by biting your shoulder just under the collar of your t-shirt. "There now it's offical" he says so excited he's practically jumping up and down "you're my mate!"

Swiss adores your eyes, he thinks they are the most awesome thing ever, and so beautiful. He tells you this a lot.

Swiss adores how much of a goofball you are, he is too, and you spend a lot of time together both laughing so hard you end up tearing up.

If your anxeity is getting bad he will cuddle and do anythig he can to help. If things get too much and you seem sad he'll hold you. He will cuddle you as long as you need. Then he'll try and take your mind off things, anything to get you to laugh a little and smile. Swiss is chaos personified but one thing is constant for him, he loves you and is devoted to you.

Swiss can keep up with your changing interestests. Infact he loves it! This Ghoul enjoys chaos and jumping around from thing to thing, that keeps him occupied. Whatever you get into he'll throw himself into it completely with you.

He is fascinated by all the things you collect. He loves how varied they are and the skeleton with a moutache is his favourite. He was very excited when you whittled him a bear. You handed it to him and he just looked at it like 'woow this is awesome'. he keeps it in his room, pride of place.

He's more than happy to help you learn guitar, he gets so excited his tail starts swishing around. He passes you his guitar and sits behind you legs either side of you showing you a cord and then letting you practice. He'll kiss your neck or softly bite your shoulder every now and then. He'll rest his chin on your shoulder and watches. He smiles at how fast you are learning, his smile is gorgeous enough to make your heart melt for him, to forget completely what you were playing and you just smile back. Often this leads to you getting so distracted the guitar gets forgotten as he presses his lips to yours.

~

Written by Nyx

[grossdyke]

would you spare some regulily Jennifer’s body au of your own? :)

im guessing you mean some thoughts i have about the regulily/jennifers body au !!

so obviously it’s based on the film!! this all started with when i got an anon about cheerleader reg and marching band lily !! and since then it has spiraled <3 it’s lesbian regulily (<- my personal go-to) and im thinking reg and lily are already close friends like needy and jennifer !!

i see them going to see a band just like in the film. its lilys favorite band and reg takes her and decides then and there that she’ll sleep with the lead singer only to ruin the band for lily forever ..

reg gets turned into a monster girl in the same way basically as in the film !!

lilys boyfriend is james.. they’re a good stable and boring couple. everything is always as it should be between them. good girl lily evans and her stable boyfriend james. high school sweethearts and all that

i don’t think lily would be the unpopular girl in this au like needy is in the film !! she’s not necessarily the popular girl either but she’s simply the girl next door. everyone likes her, boys are drawn to her, teachers favorite, the very object of regs desires even before he become a man-eating monster

and same with reg!! he wouldn’t really be the popular girl like jennifer is !! he’s sort of popular because hes a cheerleader and he has an in with the popular girls. but he’s a loner at heart and he’s mostly faking it with his cheerleader pals. also he/him nonbinary lesbian regulus as per usual. he wears the ’male’ cheerleader costume but he’s also so very pretty. everyone wants him but no one knows him

so in this au i would spin it so that the boys he kills are the ones pining after lily…. and james is the last one to go <3

i would also spin it so that lily isn’t scared of reg like needy is of jennifer in the film. i think lily would TRY to be scared of reg. she should be HORRIFIED. but she just… isn’t.. it satisifes something dark and buried inside her. it even makes her desperately jealous that reg is ’seducing’ all these boys before she knows what’s really going on. and honestly, even then she’s still jealous

lily tries to tell herself she has to do the right thing just like needy. tries to tell herself she needs to stop him. and then i see this sort of breaking point where lily just.. realises she doesn’t care. thinks it’s insaney hot even. feels very special that reg would kill for her. feels at home in the morally corrupt instead of the heavy guilt and exhaustion of being on a pedestal. she’s been faking her whole life up to the point where she didn’t even realise she had been faking… it’s sort of like she Wakes Up

then there’s the make out scene…. which we’ve discussed… which i see going literally exactly like in the film….. yummers

so instead of reg killing james, like jennifer killing whatever his name is, i see maybe reg and lily killing him together <3

OR i see this as the very moment where everything clicks for lily but reg has already gotten away…… and what if there was a cat-and-mouse sequel au…. where lily is either locked up like needy, or has to go on a mission to find regulus again……

LIKE. I USED TO BE NORMAL. THE IMPLICATIONS. THE PARALLELLS. THE ONLY THING LILY EVER TRIED TO BE AND THEN HER ENTIRE CONCEPT OF HER OWN REALITY IS JUST SHREDDED …. could be so very interesting……

also bonus:

regulus. youngest sibling. the youngest sibling is always left hungry and wanting and now he’s cursed to literally always be hungry and wanting. the fall from grace….. his desire becoming SO literal….

the monster girl trope being a metaphor for girlhood and comp het and puberty (<— and yes i do obviously include trans women in that)…. becoming something so ugly and repulsive to other people and there’s nothing to DO about it. all you can do is go through it against your will.. desiring your girl best friend, in a small secluded town, and feeling monstrous and alone and guilty.. your body is changing and you cant keep up…. RRRRAAAAA the inherent female experience of feeling disgusting for having a body

…. i think about them a lot

[showrunnerihardlyknowher]

How would a meeting/conversation between all your protagonist go down? Like who would like or dislike one another, who would get along etc.

Also how would a conversation go amongst them of who has it the worst (in their current situation)

(Which imo has to be Jacob(which i think is his name forgive me if im wrong), with Serena being a close second, and borrower kid 3rd (cus everyone he know is probably dead, and he's also very young) the rest in between, with light house dude (can't remember his name) being close to last because they objectively imo are in the best position/situation compared to everyone else despite having a broken limb.)

Ooooohhh interesting...let's see, if we skip any secondary characters and focus only on the protags which are the tinies, we'd have -- Jacob, Jamie/Nano, Serena, Jasper, Milo, Kumiko, and Felix. But we can knock off Kumiko and Felix for now since they only exist in art and don't have a story written yet.

It's very funny to imagine because all of them are regular sized humans except Milo who's a borrow, so I think they'd be a bit freaked out that something smaller than them can also exist and have no idea how to cope with being the 'giants' for the first time.

Jacob and Serena would probably get on pretty well via traumabonding since they have similar vibes (college student minding their business before being kidnapped by a monster that's killed like 50 ppl). Jamie would probably hang out with Jasper more since those two don't have too serious of an issue with their giant counterparts, but Jamie would be sooooo fucking bored being used to doing hero stuff while Jasper just sits in a lighthouse all day.

Jamie is also Milo's unofficial babysitter because they have the ability to shrink down and take care of him at a similar scale, which they don't overly mind, but they're still kinda annoyed they're the one stuck with the job when Jacob is way better with kids from experience (Mibao, and just being the baby in the family himself). Jacob thinks Jasper is hella cool and living every artist's dream life, but Serena thinks he's hard to talk with since he's from the late 1800's and doesn't know what a toaster is.

Everyone keeps making jokes that Jacob is the only one of them not in their 20's besides the actual child, which makes him a baby by default. Milo likes all of them but definitely prefers Jamie since they can be small like him. Serena thinks Jamie is kind of annoying but deals with it. Jasper is sweet but all of them have to explain at some point or another that certain things aren't very politically correct to say anymore, especially to a bisexual man, a black woman, and a Latino nonbinary.

In terms of who has it worst to best, its fairly agreed that its:

Jacob, Serena, Jamie, Milo, Jasper

[fictionfixations]

oc-insert

resigned to never writing multi-chaptered and naruto fics because 1. procrastination. 2. id say id need to watch naruto first to write anything about it, even if ive read an absurd amount of time travel fics, yknow?

so. uh. here. this is old. i dont need these notes anymore. so im dumping them here.

-----------------------------

the oc test: insert into naruto

no but seriously theres a stupidly large amount of more oc-inserts in naruto then any other fandom ive seen and that might be because of dreaming of sunshine (finally succumbed and read it. its not bad but my first instinct is 1. not to read first person. 2. not to read female pov. but there was a really good naruto x hp crossover with female harry. and i just had to bite the bullet at that point aghh.) i mean. im not trying to be sexist with it. but i mean. ive read way too many male/nonbinary povs that im just used to it. two, i got horribly dysphoric over she/her, although its better now (i was just in a really bad place mentally) but since i avoided it, now i avoid it out of habit and sometimes f/m relationships make me cringe. and thats probably because ive always seen the really bad ones portrayed which whoops

anyway reinen!! my beloved oc who ive only written once (in khr) which is a crime and i should write more. he/they pronouns my precious …they're probably eccentric enough that they'd belong to a clan. their appearance, he usually has his eyes closed like ranpo from bsd (but can still see), and sometimes opens their eyes in moments of shock or seriousness or something something (they have golden eyes)

also they have white hair.

they're portrayed with tan skin cause i have tan skin (reinen was originally meant to be like an oc for me the creator instead of making it look like me like i had before. but then it became something entirely different lmfao. reinens not an author insert because they're nothing like me hehe) but i honestly dont care what color skin they have? i dont even mention appearances half the time cause i always forget to write it

naruto-sasuke-reinen

i know sakura gets bashed on a lot (and i adore bamf sakura) and seen as the weak link or 'civilian' but hgiuf

or maybe. reinens a hatake (Hatake Rei). younger then kakashi but maybe as a assistant sensei for team 7???

naruto vocal tics (is tics the right word?)

Kakashi: maa maa (well well)

Naruto: Dattebayo! (Y'know! or Believe it!)

Kushina: Dattebane? (Yeah?)

Sasuke: hnn. (hnn.)

I'm realizing I write 'yo' a lot as a greeting

alternatively is ciao, which might be because they're first introduced in khr. as someone with mafia ties. italian. yknow.

so now i just. kind of connect reinen with italian.. ;-;

reinen being more lean and flexible? graceful in a sense. i always think of them as a performer.

although. really good at T&I? well it's less torture and more on the interrogation aspect. leaning more towards.. kunoichi aspects. i think. (they're androgynous. think epel felmier from twisted wonderland because its pretty close in appearance actually) seduction probably. (where kakashi hides his appearance, reinen flaunts it probably [kakashi pointy hair, reinen curled hair]) scarily good at acting

conflict conflict like: kakashi: you shouldve been their sensei. reinen: no-- what?? kakashi: you're better. reinen: that's not… listen. they need you. i can help them on other aspects, but im not nearly as good at being on the frontlines. your team to me looks like they'll be a bunch of heavy hitters, and i cant do that. im not good at rushing in, that's not my fighting style. i get that you feel like you're broken, that you feel like you're going to ruin them. but listen. If you don't believe me on anything else, believe me on this. It's not about you. It's about your kids. So what if you 'don't deserve them' or 'you'll get them killed'? They don't have anyone else to turn to! And you know I'm busy with other responsibilities. I can't take over your job as sensei, because that's not my job. You were assigned that job and you better do it, or I swear Kakashi. What are you going to do when they die because you didn't bother to train them properly? 'You don't know how'? You have so many people you have connections to that would be willing to help if you just ask! I know Gai's had a team for a year, he'd be overjoyed to help. Or you could at least pull a few favors, I know you have a bunch of those to get other people to train them, but you can't just leave them in the deep end. That's the thing about responsibility over people. You don't do something, other people suffer. So get it together. you don't need to be perfect

Dammit, Kakashi, those kids love you already. They adore you! They don't need you to be the best, they just need you to be there. Okay? And. Maybe this is cruel. But you're not dead. They don't need you anymore. You know who does? The living people around you. That are breathing and moving. I get that maybe you won't ever feel over it, not really, but you can't prioritize them over the living. I think you should be there more often, okay? Let them know that you're first priority will always be them, not whatever they think you're doing while you're running late and still not appearing. Let them know they can trust you to be there for them. And if you can't, let them know. Indra knows those kids need an adult in their life they can trust.

(i cant find any naruto swears in place of stuff. in some uchiha-centered fics they use like Amaterasu! or Indra, i think, although im not sure how reinen would know it. but shut up i dont know of a person and i dont think god is valid here. …that is an oddly funny part. 'i don't think god is valid here'. hehehe..)

They need someone in their corner. You can be that person. Sakura has civilian parents, they wouldn't be able to understand her and she'd have no one to vent to. Maybe she'll go to you or me, we can't force her, but what we can do is make it clear she has an option. That she doesn't have to keep it inside, and that we have a lending ear for her. I can't be that alone because I won't always be free for them. I'm not their sensei, I can't excuse myself from work for them, but you can. I can't do it all for you.

Naruto has never actually had someone who'd be there for him, who'd listen, and maybe even do anything for him. I don't think he even knows it's a thing that people usually do for those they care about! Sure, there's Iruka-san but he also has responsibilities over other children, and honestly probably overworked.

The Sandaime? The hokage is meant to be unbiased.

He can't just take a break to care about some orphan nobody likes. He doesn't even stop by that often, no matter how much he probably wants to. Naruto can't rely on him to be on his side all the time.

You can be there.

Sasuke's lost in grief and anger. He hasn't had anyone to talk it through, to actually move past it. Everyone had been too worried about catching a rogue jounin, not about how traumatized a harmless little kid might've been.

…

he was left with the consequences alone. you know how that feels. remember? good ol dad was too disgraced, nobody wanted to clean the compound. you had to do it. scrubbing it off the floors.

wanna bet sasuke had to do the same? or maybe there were cleaners, but whose to say they didn't miss a spot or two? is it any better, in a place that was once filled with people, to be entirely empty? we moved for a reason sasuke deserves the same.

help him. i was too young, you did all the work then in finding somewhere else. if not opening up our home to him, then you could at least help him in the process. make it easier.

------------

wow thats long

[joysmileyay]

today was really rough. as it always is when its time for school. i walked past someone today. they didnt see me or anything. they were in my anthropology class and we sat next toe ach other sometimes and we texted a little bit and said we should hang out and i tried to make that happen but then we just never did and then class was over and they never texted me again so i never bothered with it. so it really stung walking past them because its just another reminder that ive been in college 2 and a half years now and havent made a single friend. and at some point it was not for lack of effort. like ive tried. its like. i cant be mad or upset with myself because its not my fault is it? and i cant even be upset with that person either because well i recognize that theyre a very busy person and sometimes you just dont have room for another friend in your life. i mean shit just the other day one of a few people i know irl asked to hang out with me. we met up the other week. i decided i wouldnt have the energy to do this again, that i just wasnt really enthusiastic about them and like... i dont smoke weed and she and her friends do sooooo what would i even do. anyway i basically said yeah we arent gonna hang out again bye. and its like who am i to do that when im apparently soooo desperate for friends? i dont know. but the point is like i said if someone doesnt have the time or energy for me i get it. so i cant be mad at them, i cant be mad at myself. who the fuck am i supposed to be mad at about how lonely i am? also i cant stop thinking about how much i hate that im male because in my major seriously like 99% of the people are girls. and outside of that i generally am not interested in being friends with guys. like there are very few guys who i would approach purposefully and pretty much theyd have to be like me. and im not really a guy am i? like they have to be gay or bisexual or nonbinary or something and honestly just being gay usually isnt enough. anyway point is i hate that, outwardly at least, im a guy because i feel like the people i try to at the very least make small talk with or be friends with think im hitting on them. and its not like i fucking blame them. we all know how guys are. but beyond that it just feels like theres this barrier between me and the people who id look for companionship in just because i was born with a dick and it fucking huuuuurts dude. i feel like id have such an easier time connecting with these people if i was a woman. its so alienating and it fucking sucks. i mean deep down i basically am a woman or at least not a guy and they just cant see that. and i dont think transitioning would make that any better especially down here lol that person i was talking about is nonbinary so it hurts even more that we just didnt actually become friends because i felt so close to meeting someone who understands and then it just didnt work out. kinda feel like a caged animal that had a carrot dangled in front of it lolz! thanks for letting me whine

[codeform]

I just saw your posts about gender for that Clu person, and based on their responses, I think this is someone who is dealing with a lot of uncertainty and they were hoping for a certain answer for their question. Maybe not a permanent one, but a springboard or starting point. They are probably looking for a starting point that's a little more specific than 'whatever u want' because I think they might've said (or suggested) they aren't sure what they want.

Your answers are correct, of course, but speaking from personal experience on other topics, it can be frustrating asking for a simple yet specific answer (in this case, that would be an answer like 'cis male' or 'transfem') and getting only broad generalities. Might I suggest supplying them with some terms that seem to be a pretty close fit to what they described? You wouldn't be labeling them, you'd just be giving them some things to Google so they can see if it fits them. A place to start their gender identity journey from (because some people do feel more secure when they have that 'label' and this person might be one of those. And that's completely okay if they need that.)

Hope this helps you and them!

i Absolutely agree w u anon! but (and i am speaking as sm1 whose early exploration was almost entirely based off of discussions w highschool friends— all 2nd hand information. which is its own can of worms hsdfjkjs) i do think its important to like. do that initial footwork yourself?

bc (n im glad u agree!) there is just no neat answer!! esp not w nonbinary genders!! I (a man who has a very weird gender itself) am still constantly learning!! and i did edit one of my rbs but idk if Hal saw, but i think a very good place to start is less "what is upsetting me abt my gender" but rather "what is making me happy" — this is just generally a less painful jumping-off point too, bc its usually easier to work through when you're confused (its a lot to unpack upset/pain/confusion at the SAME TIME!!! not fun)

i will stick by honestly wikipedia as a genuinely useful surface level resource. install shinigami eyes so u dont wind up on transphobic sites and it has a solid rundown of both your "basic" terms and the history of the community, especially bc it is very hard if impossible to get an answer when youre asking sm1 else "heres what i feel now what am i." skhsdhf

and no hate!!! genuinely!!! thats a very easy place to wind up in, where u just WANT a clear-cut answer from sm1 else, but like i said b4: nobody knows you better than YOU!! i think theres like. this idea that we all just Knew and the truth is no, i promise we did not. we have all googled "nonbinary definition" "demigender definition" "neopronouns definition" i went thru 2 whole entire genders b4 i settled on Man and MORE AFTER THAT before settling on Man But Weird

AND ALSO. i am open to questions!!!!!!! but i am A WEIRD DUDE W AUTISM AND I AM NOT BUILT FOR MAKING SENSE!!!!! i promise i AM trying!!! and will continue to try!!! but it is abt to be June and pride is this month and wholeheartedly go to your local pride events if you are confused!!!!!! take to queer ppl who are both prepared to answer questions AND can provide much more relevant, local(!!!) resources — and talk to queer elders!!!! meet the coolest people in the world forever!!!!

but yea to circle back 2 th point i was like. Trying to make. doing that initial footwork yrself is the easiest i think bc you know you. i promise even tho it seems daunting it WILL ultimately be less confusing than trying 2 play 2nd hand telephone even if yr playing w friends (like i did. not ideal — wasnt safe for me to research myself but still Not Ideal)

[theclo4ked1]

iiiIIT'S SUMMER! Well, not quite, but close (enough...) I feel so free, but you know what isn't free? My laptop's storage space, there's a gigabyte and a half left on the C drive right now, but that hinders the performance; it frees its own space so I can put more things, but that's not good since the computer needs those resources to function goodly, or so I've heard.

This is why I am (not) launching a Kickstarter to buy a Faster Stronger Better Gaben- I mean a cooler computer, preferably a desktop tower. Here's a list of perks and things YOU will RECEIVE If you support me:

 

 

...and as a bonus,  

Please (do not) donate! Give to the (not so) needy XP... Alright alright, I was just playin'. I finally caught another break so now I can rest and do other things like: cleaning... AHEM so, some days ago, I made a short post hinting at something I was doing relating to Dora the Explorer, if it wasn't obvious. If you know me, you'd know that show (the first four seasons anyway) is a...pretty significant part of my life, and I look forward to what plans the creators have in store for her future.

Hm, what's that? A reboot on Paramount+? One season has been released? Oh, okay, yeah I'll give it a look- Kathleen Herles returns as a voice? Holy. Miér-coles. Okay real talk, I was gonna watch regardless of if she was gonna come back as a voice, if she would come back at all. I actually just watched the first Paramount+ episode, not the ones pre-released on YouTube, and when I finished watching it, I thought to myself...

Huh. I don't think I learned much of anything.

Maybe the point is to just entertain children, and if that's the case, fine. But in my opinion, that makes this reboot far less interesting. Y'know I wrote this big ass post to the Forum for the franchise's fandom wiki giving a critical look at the reboot, "Dora '24", and comparing it to the original show that I lovingly call "Dora2K" because the show began airing in 2000, but did you know it was being produced in the late '90s? I call them by numbers after "Dora" because the new show is just called "DORA", subtitled "Say Hola to Adventure". Anyways, I'd appreciate if you read it, and gave me your thoughts either here or there. Actually, I found out today that someone wanted to know about a Discord to talk about the show, one that I did want to lead, but wasn't sure how it would go, how to promote it, who would help moderate; the works. Okay okay okay okay, enough pr'amble, (more like mumble lol (could you even call it preamble? i got caught up in things again, im so sorry)) BEHOLD, MY FLOATING MA- *skips cutscene*

This, my guys, gals, and nonbinary pals, is my BIG FUCKING THING! I'm not just referencing the Shadow the Hedgehog Fandub unnecessarily, no, this paper is approximately 4'x6'. "seee~, moy grahn-day" teehee Yes, this is what was brewing at D(ora) ‘n D(rawing). I planned for a cubism kind of drawing, then saw it after it was finished and decided it wasn't exactly cubism, then I was told it looked like cubism, so ultimately... It'S iS CuBiSm!!! I didn't explain it before, but the drawing takes from that scene from the live-action movie where Dora's cutting a GOT damn rug at the high school dance. She dances in a style that mimics animals from the rainforest, but the thing about that scene is that it's just Dora on the floor-a. Everybody else is by the wall, not on the dance floor at all because it's an awkward event, as any school would have it. I call this piece "Disco Dorka: Inspiring Sunshine", but I shortened it to the subtitle when sharing it with peers. "Inspiring", because the whole scene with Dora just being herself, not giving a damn (though I can't remember if she knew the other students were making fun of her right there) is inspiring to me. "Sunshine" comes from the sun costume Dora wore because it was a solar system-themed school dance. You may have noticed this is an ink drawing as opposed to my pencil or a digital drawings. A month or two ago, I was introduced to ink, and of course, that changed my life. I wholeheartedly adore ink, THIS is what I needed, it's a digital exclusive thing I can achieve only on a computer screen; it flows, it can make thick black lines THATS LIKE MY FAVORITE THING IN THE WHOLE WORLD but its messy but like OMG WHO. DA HELL. CARES?

Being introduced to ink really helped me to find myself, artistically, and my, is it freeing to know what I can do; what kinda potential I had. I apologize if it sounds like I'm bragging, but I think maybe it shows that finding out exactly what you're made of requires you to go outta your zone. Not your comfort zone, just what you know. Explore. (oh my god thats dora's whole thing, wtf why does it loop back) Last thing I wanna bring up is the text. I was told by peers that adding text is something that defines my ink style, it makes it mine. Probably not unique, I shouldn't have to say "i KnOw I'm NoT tHe FiRsT", but I know. I'mnotthefirstHAHA The text references Season 3 and parts of 4 of "Dora2K", y'know, the stars that Dora and Boots caught like Pokémon? It confuses me, do the stars travel from Star Mountain and are returned there from a wormhole in the Star Pocket, or is the Star Mountain in the pocket a pocket dimension, or OUGH! MY HEAD. The movie, as far as I know, makes no reference to this. I thought of writing REACH FOR THE STARS but then I was like "nah that's Sonic, this is about Dora now change it" and so i did. Ah, that's all I wanna say about my cool thing. These last four months have certainly been a trip, but now you can expect MORE ART probably. I'd get back to playing Sonic Mania (which is apparently bad now??) but I'm too tired...zzzzzzz... zzzz- oh yeah thanks for reading... z.....zzzz......zzzzzzz.......

[remix-of-your-guts]

insisting that you're 'literally trans' over and over sounds kind of like the terf line about how everyone's non binary, so given that and your post history it looks really suspicious

okay i legit can't tell if this is bait or something because?? what???? i said i was "literally trans" one time because someone asked if radfems reblogging my post meant i agreed with their beliefs and i chose to interpret their question in good faith so i gave a legit answer. i haven't bothered to respond to a single comment from obvious terfs because im not into giving them the time of day.

i'm not sure how me simply existing as a trans individual is agreeing with the argument that terfs make to try and erase the existence of us that "everyone is basically nonbinary because gender isn't psychological at all it's just what's in your pants" (im assuming that's the line you're talking abt and if not then idk what that is) and that's frankly a bizarre leap to make. especially because i don't even call myself nonbinary, im just a genderqueer (as in my gender is inseparable from my queerness) transsexual man.

and just what the hell is suspicious about my post history? i've been posting about trans rights and trans-inclusive feminism since i started this blog, though i can't guarantee every hot take i've had on incredibly niche intra-community discourse aligns with my current beliefs (which mostly boils down to "internet discourse is stupid" and idc)

i don't understand the phrasing here as though i'm fighting widespread accusations of transphobia or transmisogyny when this is literally the first comment i've ever gotten insinuating something like that??? of course that's not including the terfs saying "so close bestie" right before calling me a "retarded tra" but since when do we base our claims of who is and is not a terf on what the terfs themself say, instead of what the person in question has actually said/done? plus making fun of how im "close but missing the point" because i said that a trans woman may have a bit of internalized misogyny is hardly saying i clearly agree with everything they stand for (in fact it's fundamentally about the fact that i dont). if thats what you consider being claimed by terfs, and if being claimed by terfs is what you consider the deciding factor in whether or not someone is one, then basically every blogger who's ever mentioned general feminism, periods, or being a woman on this website would be a terf (even trans femmes cuz ive seen posts from them accidentally get passed around terf circles without them knowing who op is). especially every transmasc on this website would be a terf then considering that they're so bizarrely determined to get us to join them while being violently bigoted against us and dehumanizing us (obv not to the extent of trans women but still it's hardly an effective recruitment tactic) and allying with the people that explicitly want our extermination.

i'd once again like to remind everyone that all i did was point out a woman who happens to be trans accidentally veering into perpetuating misogynistic stereotypes (something that i will call out even quicker when cis women do it, which they do all the fucking time) in a way that made it clear it wasn't a big deal and expecting no one except my followers (which i'm pretty confident in saying none of whom are at least obvious terfs) to see. hopefully we can all agree that trans women are not immune to accidentally perpetuating misogynistic stereotypes- not because of their gender but in spite of it because all women can be misogynistic because MISOGYNY 👏 IS 👏 NOT 👏 STORED 👏 IN 👏 THE 👏 GENDER

and for the record even in the tags of the og post i was saying that it's really sucky that people totally are going to overreact to this and give dylan disproportionate hate because there 100% is a double standard in how society at large responds to these things, and that terfs are going to use it as "proof." but i don't think that just because accusations of misogyny are often weaponized against trans women we can never engage in good faith criticism of them??? in fact i think that makes it very important to help each other make sure there isn't any grain of truth terfs can latch onto (by which i mean being conscious of misogynistic patterns for everyone in our community, including anyone who considers themself an ally to trans people, not unfairly policing just trans women).

however obviously i regret making the post now since it clearly just encouraged the transmisogyny hate-train. and has caused my asks and notes to be flooded with transphobic bullshit directed at dylan, obviously, but also at myself. seriously, i've been deleting all the anons that are from terfs (like ive always done cuz they've targeted me before) but it's been some nasty shit. and it's really fucking annoying having to block every one that crawls over here to tell me why i'm apparently retarded for being trans and supporting my trans sisters. (sorry about the r slur- their words not mine)

okay done talking abt this forever now

[deepfriedseagullfeet]

my marvin! lore rundown under the cut: 

24-28, nonbinary (they them), pan/ace, 5’4”

what is there to say about marvin? theres not really anything ‘canon’ to compare them to, and in general, everyone’s marvins in the community are different and unique!! this ego gives so much creative freedom cause of the lack of canon content, so its always fun to see what other people do with that!

in general, my marvin is indeed still a magician, and they do have cool sorcerer powers that i still havent completely pinned down, but their main power is summoning fire, telepathy/making things move with their mind, and probably other miscellaneous things ive imagined over the years but never wrote down!

so lets talk about backstory. they were the third ego without a previous life, but they have quite a colorful life when they get created. like i feel like more happens with marvin even before anti its crazy. so flashback to the tiny apartment jack and jackie lived in, thats where marvin comes in. and uh, jack hated them the moment he saw them. my marvin has these cat like features to them. they have fangs and sharp teeth, sharp claws, and yellow pupil-slit eyes. they came out sick and unresponsive for a short time when they were born, and when they did feel well enough, they set things on fire and stuff with magic they couldnt control.

jackie, who again at the time was dealing with unmedicated schizophrenia, became really close with marvin in that kid sort of way. they were both sick and being neglected by jack. and things only got worse.

marvin was, or at least what jack assumed to be, was dying. and jack didnt want to have a body in his apartment. so he took marvin in the night, drove them out to the middle of the surrounding woods, and left them there on the ground. when he got back, jackie was heartbroken over marvin not being there, asking where they went. jack told him they ran away. and when it didnt make sense to jackie that an essentially sick baby thats never left the flat before ran off, jack told him he was delusional and to go back to bed.

now obviously, marvin didn’t end up dying alone in the woods. in fact, they got so, so much better. turns out that marvin gets a lot of their energy from nature, and being out there gave them the strength to get better. and this person basically lived like some kind of feral disney princess for awhile. another power that i just remembered about is they can talk to animals!! so yeah, literal disney princess. they hunted fish to eat and slept under trees, all the while waiting for jack to come back to get them. but he never did.

so at this point, marvin meets someone out there in the woods. i call this guy Mr. Burnake based off that one lemon demon song, but ill probably change his name someday. also he looks like arin hanson, which may or may not be a nod to the fact that a danny avidan lookalike was jackies mentor.

as u may guess, this other guy was a powerful sorcerer, and noticing this dirty, feral magician out in the woods, he took them in and took care of them for awhile. he was the one who really taught marvin the value of magic, and how to use theirs. he became kinda a father figure to marvin, and when he disappeared one day, marvin was pretty sad, but felt that they had learned enough to go out into the world.

things move pretty fast from here, like marvin gets a job at a theater, and eventually becomes a stage magician, impressing people with their magic! it was a wild time for them, being popular and having all this attention, finally getting to express themself on stage. they went through a lot of changes, figuring out their gender identity and stuff. all good things.

now ok. im gonna be real with yall. idk what happens next because it always changes. so ive sorta decided to align all the different ideas into one idea. so here it is. basically Anti comes to marvin’s show and falls in love with them, DESPITE still being with jameson at the time. they meet up, marvin becomes interested in anti too, they start dating. then marvin figures out about jameson, then figures out anti’s a demon, then figures out anti wants to kidnap and probably torture them to death in his basement, and nopes the fuck out of there.

from then on, because they knew anti was also made by jack, they wanted to find out if jackie was still out there. they tracked him down and met henrik and chase, and it was this big reunion and it was great. and then marvin is like ‘hey, antis still out there and someone is with him’ and thats when jackie is like oh SHIT and they all decide to go hunt anti and save jameson. or something like that. idk anti has to die and jameson has to get rescued somehow.

so yeah, from then on, marvin just kinda lived with the other egos and still performed while spending time with their new family. good times.

so some other basics about marvin is that they have a very witty and proud personality. their pretty short but still walk tall. they can come off as being an asshole sometimes, just because they tend to think they know whats best, and can be a lil narcissistic sometimes. they have a hard time making connections, even with the other egos, because of their past of being abandoned, but they still love the others, jackie especially. i like a storyline where they fall a little bit in love with jackie, but grow closer to chase, and they have this soft-undefined kinda lovey relationship. but, yeah, this is marvin!

[creacherkeeper]

it doesn't matter if your label is 'accurate' so long as its serving you

i've been having this conversation with a few people lately, so i thought i'd try to get my thoughts down. its something that i think about a lot as both a queer and neurodivergent person

i think that labels are incredibly important and life changing and meaningful. and i also think that, especially for things like queer identity and neurodivergence, labels are so startlingly made up and constructs of society, culture, and time in a way that we fundamentally cannot get around

many people have heard the term 'social construct' before. but a lot of people haven't really unpacked it. it's something that i think about a lot, because the labels i use for myself have changed a lot over my life, some of them because the labels i use now weren't around when i first starting feeling certain ways, but also because our conception of those identities have changed radically over the course of history, even in the recent past

an example: i first started feeling Gender Weirdness at age 5. i had no term or concept of it at the time. i stumbled upon a blog (like an actual one, not tumblr style) from a queer teenager when i was 12 and they explained the term 'genderqueer'. i felt immense joy and comfort that i finally had a word for what i was going through. flash forward to my freshman year of college, where a friend has to explain the term 'nonbinary' to me and that thats what people are using now. i think, huh, okay, i guess im nonbinary. 8 years later and i use the term nonbinary for myself (in addition to trans man), but still, in my heart of hearts, think of myself as genderqueer. because nonbinary as a term had not been invented yet when i first needed it (and, fun fact, the term genderqueer wasn't coined until the year i was born as well)

another example: i was diagnosed with autism when i was 19. there was no way in hell i wouldve gotten diagnosed as a young AFAB child, and only got diagnosed at 19 because i sought it out, shopped around for diagnosticians, and found one who had lots of experience with AFAB adults. now, 7 years later, there probably aren't any updated, current professionals who would deny i was autistic. because the diagnostic criteria and process, and the concept of autism, has changed so radically in the last 20+ years. btw, i was only diagnosed with 'autism' and not 'aspergers' because that term had been phased out months before i got my dx. i called myself an aspie for a small while and then decided i liked autistic better, because it included the whole community. i almost never see the term aspergers used as a self identifier anymore, but only months before my dx thats what i wouldve been called

this is basically my point: the terms we use are going to change, and the definitions those terms have are going to change, and who falls into what category is going to change, and there's pretty much close to zero we as individuals can do to effect that. and thats fine, and good, and the natural progression of human cultures

which means that the labels we're using today may not be the ones we use in 10, 20, 50 years and thats fine. maybe our experience and self conception will be the same or maybe it wont be and thats fine. labels are entirely made up social constructs that cannot possibly encapsulate all of human experience and variety. so instead of asking yourself if a label is accurate or true, ask if its serving you

does this label make me happy? does this label make me feel comfortable, like im at home? does this label put me around people i want to be around, and feel like i want to fit with? does this label bring me community that makes me feel safe? does this label grant me access to resources that will make my life easier, more manageable, more accessible, or more enriched?

when i was a teenager, i identified as aroace. do i still now? no. but at the time that term brought me a lot of joy, and comfort, and safety. it gave me time to process my feelings about gender and sexuality and trauma and abuse and all the other things i wasn't ready for yet. up until recently, i identified as butch. do i still now? no. but that label let me explore presentation and experience queer relationships. will i identify as a nonbinary bi trans man forever? probably not, if im being honest. but that set of labels is bringing me a lot of peace and excitement right now, and is keeping me safe during my transition. am i going to identify as autistic forever? maybe, maybe not. our knowledge is expanding and changing so rapidly, even in my lifetime so far, that i dont think things will be the same when im middle aged or older. but right now that identity brings me understanding and resources and community (and a job lol) so i am comfortably and proudly autistic. for right now. because its working

tl;dr: stop being so scared about whether a label is "true" or not. start asking yourself if that label can, for the time being, give you what you need. and if things end up changing, either terms or your conception of yourself, that's fine. don't try to fight it. this is a natural progression of both society and our individual journeys. let a label serve you, not box you in. they aren't fundamental truths about the universe, they're tools, so start treating them that way

[islandofsages]

WOO happy to know you do familial bonds!! i am on a mission to spread the word about big brother thoma

could i request older brother thoma hcs with a gn (or nonbinary specifically if you do not mind hehe) reader?? whether they're actually related or just have a close sibling bond doesn't matter to me i just wish he was my brother LMFAO

also not a child reader ofc :) his older brother energy is just STRONG and i want to give him a hug

(also side note but it's really nice seeing platonic/familial fics as an aroace person — they're so underrated and comforting 😭)

summary: in which he is the sun illuminating your days.

characters: thoma x nb!reader

tags: platonic, canon compliant, fluff + crack, hc format, the kamisatos are mentioned

warnings: hugging

author's notes: BIG BROTHER THOMA AGENDA YASS decided to go for nonbinary reader bc there's a lack of that methinks. this could be read as either blood-related or chosen family so dw !! as someone who has a chosen family younger sibling, my older brother instincts kicked in LMAO 

also omg im aroace too!! and i agree sm anon, sometimes platonic/familial fics are just,, much more fun than romantic/sexual fics tho i do read romantic zhongli fics sometimes but i interpret them as queerplatonic bc holy hell there are little to no queerplatonic works out there. anyways hope you like this <3

thoma is pretty much a big brother to everyone but especially you - he’s your biggest brother! well, that was what he tried to insist initially before realizing it sounds kind of weird. but you get the point

somewhat overprotective but in a lectures-you-lovingly-about-every-little-thing-especially-if-you’re-going-abroad kind of way. look, he can’t help but worry about you, okay? though it does get annoying and you have to tell him that you’re capable of taking care of yourself

it doesn’t matter how busy he is; he will cook up lunch for you or bring it to you if you yourself are busy. what if you’re not in inazuma city or even inazuma itself? well, rest assured he’s gonna pop up behind you and jumpscare you with good food get it delivered…somehow. he’ll find his ways

if you don’t dislike hugs then get ready because, oh boy, he’s gonna give you so many. it doesn’t help that he’s great at them too, and that he feels nice to hug in general. no matter how mad you are at him (if it’s even possible to be mad at him), you can never resist any of his hugs

this but with you two:

jokes aside, he’s obviously very supportive of you! but if anyone dares make any negative comments on your identity…well. let’s just say they’re toast. just kidding, he’s not that violent - but if prompted enough, he won’t hesitate to pull out a few tricks.

by association, you also always hang out with the kamisatos too. and by hang out i mean mostly preventing ayato from giving thoma food poisoning by distracting him with a game of chess and trying to find where the hell ayaka went in thoma’s stead. thoma’s apologetic that you have to deal with their shenanigans but you honestly don’t mind, especially because you do it for him and that the kamisatos are pretty cool people

and of course, he teaches you a tip or two when it comes to housekeeping it’s totally not his way of asking you to help him. you can’t deny it - he’s really, really good at it. you wonder if he somehow learned how to use polearms by sweeping stuff all the time

the only time he might ask for your help is if he has business concerning the grand narukami shrine, especially if he has to drop by personally. that’s when he’ll politely ask you to accompany him and help him negotiate a bit. and obviously you can’t say no; it’s not his intention but the guy has natural puppy eyes

he’s such a good listener. you could tell him anything and about everything and he’d pay attention to every single word that comes out of your mouth. and if you’re venting, he’s always there to lend a shoulder to cry on. he’s just that comfortable to be around

the sun may shine brighter tomorrow - he constantly reminds you this. but honestly, with a big brother like thoma, it seems like the sun’s always shining its best every day.