#im rly exposing myself w this one arent i

[wispscribbles]

i wolf-ified them :)

[stillwooozy]

im so happy be back in my apt it makes me feel guilty cuz i like being there for my siblings but

even post heart attack and covid and almost-death my mom is MEAN to me. everything i fcking do is wrong, and if ONLY i listened to her.

im a fucking train wreck, but im trying, and im functional. Idk i’ve learned to be proud of myself

I left at like 5am to “beat traffic” but rly i just needed to leave

My 12 yr old brother said he “didnt really love AoT & isnt invested in s4” but he’s giving Death Note a try so you know what. stfu.

A few hrs after i got back my sister called crying about my mom just being difficult to her. And i have problems w/ my sister but also.... come on. mom jfc. pretend to have an emotional iq for a second. My sister has always had a good relationship w/ my mom up until now. But i guess menopausal moms and their 19 yr old daughters dont get a long.

I have good moments w/ my mom. when she came home we were both got high on trams and weed & my sister was sober but hanging w/ us. My brothers were entertaining themselves and my dad was gone (dad and mom cannot be in the same vicinity of eachother, they legally married, but jfc they even live apart. it is hell when they are together) and it was so fun. i was making jokes (that i kinda regret because it was tmi) about the men i’ve hooked up w/ in the apt next door, and telling her about the “straight dads” down her residential block that are “discrete” on grindr. She thought it was hilarious. My sister allowed me to swipe for her on tindr & talk to guys and let me say - straight men really do suck. there was like 1 that was attractive & seemed to have a good personality & didnt want sex asap. & i think my sister is very pretty so she matched w/ a good amount of people. ANYWAYS straight guys either have 0 idea how to converse and/or just want to fuck right away. I mean those are grindr-gays, but tindr-gays arent looking for that - and if they are it obvious so u just swipe left if not interested in a hookup. I guess there isnt a straight-grindr but there should be. Anyways my mom was telling me stories about shrooming in college and when she hiked the TMB & hitchhiked around europe for 2 yrs, met my dad but forgot about him, and then met him in the US 2 yrs later. It was interesting, and she wasnt judging me & we were actually laughing. Ik its the drugs and that is sad. Ik she is “mentally ill” in some manner too, but i can’t control her lack of self awareness, all i can control is myself. And that is hard when i come from a long line of schizos & bpd & even a probably-APD! some diagnosed, some u just loook at and go “yea they are batshit” i mean... i also come from a family is severly traumatized ppl, either losing everything in ww2 and/or the whole israeli conflict. like jfc i do feel bad. fleeing europe to israel cuz no one else will take u, and then fighting for ur safety & really no other choice, and then finally ur offspring move to america and canada. my paternal grandpa is literally the sole survivor in his family of ww2, i mean he remembers nothing, he was the youngest and shipped off to America to live w/ a branch of the family that came a while earlier cuz they were offered business or something idk.

Im rly on too many stims. And yet. I am posting in my ~diary~. i get to work tomorrow and im actually happy cuz i like the research. although im having like.. nothing. u think grads are paid horribly (they are)?? Undergrads have to be groveling at the feet of ppl to get any kind of paid internship. i mean i had experience before cuz i did unpaid research for 2 semesters in another lab. My hours, when im not impromtu fleeing cuz my mom may die, are more than 40+ a week. i mean i have enough to pay rent and thats about it :/ as long as im not in debt im gucci. i stockpile on-sale dog food and im fine living off beans and rice so were good for a while. I have crypto that is a backup but that is either used for drugs and as an “investment”.

like i cant rly get a traditional 9-5 retail job while working in this lab. while also having full-time classes. i was doing lab work 20 ish hrs a week (unpaid ofc), managing my friends band/booking shows/promotating & getting a fair chunk from that, walking a neighbors dog 3 times a week but honestly that took 20 mins of my day & was almost a free $45 dollars a week cuz a just walked her w/ my own dogs, + full time school and.... pre-covid, i was getting into the groove of college & while not making a bunch - i was comfortable for being a 20yr old scumbag? i mean i was working my ass off for my friend but i enjoyed it and was optimistic as hell. i didnt have to cut myself off fully from the song revenue but honestly that was unusual (to my knowledge) for an indie band at all, but i accepted it ofc until covid. my best friend spiraled and 2 of the bandmates lost their jobs and like. their passive income was tiny so why tf should i take from it? shows & selling merch at said shows (for us) made the most. online merch is eh & i wont take a cut until after covid. Plus they are on hiatus and any local “hype” that was beginning to build is long dead cuz they are probably long dead. not high enough to give a shout out to my 2.5 followers cuz my identity will not be exposed hehehehe. i mean if someone rly wanted to u could figure out thru all my info dumping of my personal life on here but eh, pls dont. this is my fancy lil diary where i spew aboslute nonsense & show off how fast i can type when i type before i finish any type of concise thought in my head

[chikotos]

speaking of That my mom is finally recognizing that when I say “i dont feel good” it doesnt mean i have a cold or sth its that Uh, im probably experiencing suicidal thoughts and cant express it well (or at least smth along those lines) and my house has been dirty cuz i havent cleaned in a while or i cant keep it clean and she n my sister cleaned an area and i repeatedly told her not to bc shes always using my sister to do things im not adequate enough to do on time and its rlly not fair to her even if she doesnt realize it cuz like shes only 12 & we dont ever even talk so she shouldnt have to take care of someone 5 years older than her.. and i was gonna clean but I basically slept all day so i could just clean alone at night when I feel safe to walk around the house . i wasnt even tired idk why i slept but now im eerily awake and maybe will be umless i force myself to sleep

its so lonely here and thats only hit me like this year cuz all the time before I would go through periods of hanging out after school maybe.. twice a year? and only hanging out with one person whod have many friends but theyd b my only friend which is a problem i tend to have. but it jst got to the point where im realizing, i think cuz i was in my schools drama program n exposed to lots of friendships, that im jst like ,really fucking lonely. Which is unfortunate because ive always been such an internal person at home and have been able to work creatively but thats all like leaving me? art doesnt make me happy anymore because i dislike my art so much and havent had a platform to share it in so long and i guess I thrive on other ppls opinions of it? and I definitely cant write anymore. I havent been able to zone in on an interest in MONTHS and thats left me creatively drained, a lot. 

I think im starting to rlly, RLLY redirect my complete attention from interests to ppl (which always ends well am i right lads) and it isnt fair to ppl who like, have others and need space and time etc or Uh, dont even know me. but its like a switch like , I can either be creative or i can feel loved and Boy Howdy, do i need both,

its just weird cuz im the only one in my family thats emoitonal like this and I think thats why i feel so isolated. like im not exxagerating when I say my dad has 0 friends tht arent family. my mom has work friends she will hang out with maybe 4 times a year not for work, but shes always complaining abt social situations which I can understand. maybe my siblings r like that too but my sisters young n focuses on minecraft n stuff n hangs out w friends more than me n we barely know each other so its not like id know, maybe my half brother is but whens the last time hes wanted to talk to me right. like i cry all the time and all it does is make my dad angry at memfor being incompetent and make my mom think its her fault and my sister confused and jst takes up everyones time

and its jst all v strange. like i was kinda raised 2 not have friends, inadvertantly i guess. i can remember my mom trying to make me feel better about something along the lines of u can b okay w/out friends if u have family but she jst told me friends dont matter and im never gonna talk to ppl i meet at my age as an adult, so it stuck w/ me and i started to make moral judgements on ppl on small things we could talk out like say, they use homophobic language sometimes but im sure theyd respect me enough to stop, but id make those judgements before we could befriend each other n take a chance, kinda to protect myself from attachments? but later in life ive found ppl who dont do stuff like that, and thats when i focus in on them im an unfair way to them and they r the only person/group of ppl in my life, etc etc and idk how to stop because im so scared of hanging out w/ most ppl alone i guess? but ill still be here, thinking about like example (namedrop bc he doesnt have me tumblr anyways) my friend jacob tht never hung out w/ me outside of school but i fuccin loved that kid n he just stopped talking to me over the summer n ignored my text i send first day of summer and now we see each other and talk briefly but its like he wont let us be friends anymore and smth like this always happens and its So

and tbh how can i expect it to not happen when i limit myself so much n they will have plenty of other close close friends when i dont? and i think ive gotten better but idk anymore. 

and uh, unrelated. I think my dog ive had for 12 years may have to end up being put down this year. hes got cataracts in both eyes and skin diseases and back problems and teeth problems (hes inbred) and hes losing his hearing too and for the past two weeks hes been peeing everywhere and we can let him out but he cant climb stairs anymore n he has to walk them to get to our yard and im the only one w/ the patience to pick him up (hes only 8 pounds) n put him in the yard bc my parents will jst scream at him n my sister doesnt like dogs and hes got seperation issues w me and whines when he cant be in my room which is the farthest from the door out n stuff. and its like rlly stressful my mom will scream at him in front of my sister n brother n me and the other day she said my dad grabbed him by the neck and threw him out on the concrete cuz he peed inside and hes so tiny that thats just gonna make everyting worse and its notmlike i can stop them bc why would anyone listen to me and hed prob b fine for s few more years if he lived in a patient house with ppl who would take him to the vet but theyre prob gonna put him down early snd its gonna b so weird w/out him

when i showered earlier i took s razor with me w/ the intent to cut my thighs, and i did a little, but i never ever draw blood wnd its strange. why am i given these urges when im so fucking terrified of blood. itll still leave marks n stuff but it makes me feel weak ? n ill bruise myself up instead but its never the same. and im such an advocate for help w self harm but i cant for myself. its like i subconsciously want 2 get caught ? idk. i did throw my razor away though and the others i have r rusty and im not THAT much of a dumbass so i dont have options to self harm anymore unless i get new ones. lifehack

and uh lol, having no schedule n it being summer my eating habits r SHIT. it always hurts to eat p much, its at different times n most of the time i just snck only or i dont eat for hours n see black spots n stuff. and when i dont eat its not a body image thing (im nt rlly happy w my nody but its not sth not eating will help with) its cuz i dknt wanna go upstairs for food where my dad is n the snacks r downstairs so its easier, or cuz i forget or cuz i like, want to punish myself? but im too lazy to self harm. its weird

n since ive stopped id’ing as ace officially my internalized lesbophobia has gotten so much worse . im so repressed and lost ans sad, nothinng rly makes sense? I either fall in love w/ anyone who flirts with me or i focus on someone who ill never fucking talk to or see again and imagine countless scenarios n set myself up to b sad. i seek validation from ppl on it but nothhing comes out right or i just cant say it, because other than when i make myself the butt of gay jokes i just cant sven get the words out of my throat that im gay cuz im jst so ashamed and disgusted with myself. ive been looking at pictures of guys lately cuz ive been trying to force myself to like them. back when i thought i was pan it always felt safer bc i could always just love a cis guy or whatever and everything would b okay for my family ykno. and its such a shameful thing for me bc my irl friends who im out to, most see me as v confident abt it at least a little bc im loud abt it u kno, and make all sorts of jokes, and i jst know so many would b surprised or like sad abt that

i want to stop liking girls so much. like holy shit. i have so many straight girl friends and i hate it when they flirt with me because lik, none r my type so i feel nothing but then i feel like i shiuld then feel like No i shouldnt then feel like i shouldnt even be around them bc im a gross disgusting creepo dyke predator. n they always use the excuse of me having a gf so its fine id never hit on them well like, now im single so i have to be DOUBLE careful not to b affectionate w them as im w all my friends and itsssssssssssssmjshfjhdjfhsjdhjshdjshdjhsjdhsjhdjshdk

and i like, think abt this girl alot n yea its romantic even thomwe never fucking talked n rlly i do that w lots of girls and its making me lose out on friendships bc i wanna b their friends somehow bc i think theyre very cool n stuff but i cant stop hodling on to stupid daydreams n idealizations i get to distract me when im sad n its jst stupid like i know its dumb but guess whos boutta keeeeeeppppp doin it??!!!!! boy!!!

and i try so damn hard to talk feeling out, n talk abt who im attracted to n stuff w ppl, n i try so hard to gush but i cant cuz smth comes outta my mouth and then i cant speak past that and no one ends up rlly knowing how i feel, bc ANY time i talk abt anytingngay related abt me its what happens. and i listen to others talking abt tht stuff and i jsut get so god damn JEALOUS bc idk how to express myself 

all these inadequacies n shit is making it rlly hard to see how,im gonna b on my own n its always been like this. at TWELVE YEARS OLD i came to fhe fucking conclusion that i was just gonna kill myself when i turned 18 so i didnt have to deal with all this and i was OKAY WITH IT and i just went through life knowing that and hiding it and so rarely questioning my inevitable suicide as a childc so instead of dealing with all that n my problems n getting better i let myself get worse cuz uh, fuck it right

idk its all just occured to me how im not a fully functioning human being, in seberal if not all aspects of my life, its weird. now that I actively want to live and realize i uh Kinda have to simce ill b the legal guardian of my brother its all very scary

sorr i was all over the place and all the typos i didnt mean anyof them n im not crytyping like, i cried a bit but i jst hate typing kn thsi shitty tablet keyboard, n dont wanna spellcheck. if u read through comgratulations also please dont message me abt like the self harm junk n my dog n stuff like, whatever ur abt to say. I Know my guy 

time to go uhhhhhhhhhhh daydream about impossible gay shit with guilt in the back of my mind

[no2da]

dream diary,  my guys have fun

i was in a friends home, it was at night and i think i was supposed to cat sit? no one was at home (to my knowledge) but im talking to someone? probably myself?? the apartment was so huge and some of the rooms looked like the original walls had been removed and new ones been built to change the layout completely and i was asking the person who i was talking to where the bathroom was cause i couldnt find it and then i looked into the parents bedroom and theres just a doorway arch without door and a stair leading down and the steps are laid out with tiles and at the bottom i can see a bathroom and im just thinking, oh wow i thought this was a flat, also. lol they have no bathroom door you can hear everyone shit from the beds. and i wanted to go down there and i thought, must suck for the parents to have everyone go through their bedroom to go use the toilet. and when was downstairs i realized the bathroom wasnt a bathroom but just a narrow hallway and there were some doors leading into rooms and one rooms door was slightly open and light was coming out and i was like, shit!!!! and i run upstairs and when im in the bedroom again i whisper really angrily ‘why didnt you tell me theres still someone here ???!! ‘ and then i go down again cause i wanna know who is there and i peak through the gap between the door and its some kid watching tv and she turns around and looks me straight in the eye and i fucking run away that was so scary. i run into one of the other rooms and barricade the door and sit there and im having the image in my head of me cutting the throat of that kid with a sickle and hearing, that would solve the problem, and then im like, no!! and see myself cutting my own throat with the sickle and im like, THAT would solve my problem you sick fuck, and then i can see whats happening out the door and theres the kid standing with a sickle about to ram it into the wood and then im outside again but she didnt notice me and i grab her arm and softly say, no, and then im in another room and theres someone with me and also a cat and the other person is doing embroidery and im playing with the cat with their yarn and i try to roll the thread back and the other person says they dont want it anymore cause the cat had it in its mouth.

i woke up for a bit cause the dorm next to mine is getting renovated and they made some noise but i fell asleep again

all the characters from naruto where having like a banquet for borutos anime debut, and they werent animation but real life people, like sasuke was some middle aged dude wearing the shittiest wig and tenten a rly tall black girl, also tenten was the owner of the venue where the party was hold. this was in the late evening it was dark already. then everyone noticed that boruto wasnt even there so they started a search for him. this lead out of the city. there were like only two locations (it was around sunset now), one was a still picture of a highway crossing and the other was a highway along a huge field of wheat. boruto was in that field for idk what reason, there was also a black kid with bleached hair and a rifle sneaking around in there. the search troupe werent aware of them and were looking on the other side of the highway. then there was a small explosion followed by a gun shot  in the field. at one end we now could see a couple police guys swat gear ?? and a drone was flying over the field. could see boruto dodging the shot from the swat guys but couldnt dodge the drone. the kid with a rifle was standing a couple meters away not being fast enough for any real reaction. then choji and his mom and dad were there, jumping in and like, matrix like blowing the fucking bullets away, ,,. then everyone was like lets go back home we saved boruto blah and some guy was like, anyone know this kid (with the rifle) but no one knew him but they took him back to the city with them, and on the way back there was the still picture of the crossing again and someone commented, hey, the sun hasnt moved one bit but our search lasted hours? also didnt we start the search at night why is it still sunset? 

idk who made this comment but naruto tried to dismiss it and then we were back at tentens restaurant and someone (I Cant remember) was leading shikamarus child in there (still like a toddler) cause they thought the father was in there, but tenten told them he wasnt there but they were like, oh well lets still let him wait for him here and brought him to their usual table and josuke and okuyasu (whatefuck are you guys doing here) were sitting at the table and okuyasu gave tenten a compliment on her new suit. when the person who brought the child was gone tenten went into the kitchen and talked to one of the waitresses about how weird that was and she was really worried about something called an ACADEMIA and suspecting something to happen, then the kitchen door opened and some huge ass slimey meat blob came through and it had a mouth and when it opened it we could see its tongue and its tongue had a mouth again (haha) and shikamarus kid was like, slowly coming out of that second mouth and it was crying and the thing was starting to talk and it said it was an ACADEMIA (my guy thats the name of this fucking alien thing what the fuck ,mind the capital letters) and how it needs to kill all life forms that arent ACADEMIAs and then the waitress started screaming and took one of those huge metal trays for baking and just starts beating the alien with it and it was just like fucking putty but the thing about those aliens was that they could regenerate if left alone, so tenten and the waitress shoved the thing under a pantry so it wouldnt have the space to become big again and they also folded the edges of the, flat putty thing over, so it coudlnt grow limbs?? (it didnts even have limbs in the first place waht) and after that was done tenten realized that shikamarus kid was gone now too, killed along w the alien and she had a come up with something now

and while this happened in the kitchen >>I<< (but, i wasnt watching the whole thing from >my< perspective i was still watching it all like in a movie and suddenly i am an actor in it) showed up at the restaurant and just started, grocery shopping there?? i bought a weird moldy lemon (only because a waitress convinced me to buy it and i cant say no), a lemon the size of a melon, a pack of tiny muffins and one huge muffin, and chocolate covered biscuits, white chocolate and some weird ass red one. and i stole the shopping cart i just took it home with me, and i lived in some weird ass run down shit house with a netto right next to it and i fucking go grocery shopping in a restaurant instead, i bring the fucking shopping cart with me into the kitchen and a family is there while i unpack the groceries, and im. like. posing for one of their family members. i dont know these people and they dont know im not really the person they think i am but im not even in disguise. so i put the muffins on the counter and say i bought the huge one for (i forgot the name) and the white chocolate biscuits for (i forgot the name too), they were the two daughters. muffin was the younger one and biscuits the older one, but then older one comes up to the counter and takes the muffin and looks at me really knowingly and says thanks in a rly weird way and im just, shit. i fucked up they know now im not the real thing. and i just try to play it cool take the lemons and go back to my room.

and my room is . the set for a historical play about suffragettes im writing and and all the actors and technicians etc are there  and deedee is there too and shes asking me to give her a role in the play and i want her to play one of the suffragettes (note: the costumes for the suffragettes were mainly made out of belts, weird) and of course the character deedee plays must be a lesbian too but my director says she can only have a crush on another woman whos already married to a man, no requited romance cause i already wrote another gay couple in the script and there cant be two according to him and that pissed me off so i want to take it out on his favorite male character. he was supposed to have a party hosted at his house and i change the scene so the party is somewhere else. i put down the lemons on my bed and climb on it to take down the wall carpet, which was like, essential for the guys party scene, idk why my bed was in the scene. the carpet was super gross like tons of dust and lady bugs and there were even. tiny plants sprouting from it and i verbally let my anger out on the guy and he gave me a vacuum cleaner so i could clean and while i try to suck in some lady bugs  and in that moment the bag is apparently full and so fucking full that the shit comes out at the tube and the end piece and there are tons of bugs and i just let it drop cause it scares me and the older sister who exposed me tells me to change the bag and takes my lemons and i just wanna cry cause the fucking bugs are on my bed and i dont wanna open that thing and she took my lemons!!! but im strong and go get a new bag and open the vacuum and cleaner and for some reason i have a pair of scissors now and cut open the old full bag (WHY WOULD I DO THIS) and theres bugs crawling everywhere, silver fish and lady bugs and im just sitting in this pile of shit, good morning

[everythingmustgo]

leo sun sagittarius moon libra rising if youre still doing these!!!!!

hello hello im a leo sun libra rising too !!! leos r great we have a flair for the dramatic nd I love it, outgoing and exuberant, life of the party nd thrives off attention. most leos r extraverted nd confident tho not all, shy introverted leos exist esp if ur dominant is a water sign or water signs r recurrent in ur chart. all leos r high maintenance tho, need to b liked nd b told that they r liked, terrified of being unwanted they gotta Get That Attention to feel comfortable w themselves. need to b social. cuz ur a fire sign ur v much focused on taking action nd can hav an aggressive streak. its the downside of leos, cuz theyre so proud nd egocentric its v easy for them to b mean. b aware of urself and how others react to u, dont let ur pride make u disrespectful. however the BEST thing abt leos imo is how loyal and generous we r. leos will spoil the FUCK out of their friends and express their full, unrestrained love for u often. often expresses love thru buying gifts and paying for shit as we’re incredibly materialistic (catch me rn tryna stop myself buying a cute shirt from h&m as a way to make me feel better). got a hard time controlling our impulses. spontaneous !!! will sweep u off ur feet w big romantic gestures, they rly are tru romantics at heart. idealists. high standards tho, we expect the same treatment back bc this is what we recognise as love nd affection! leos often feel underappreciated bc most people dont go as All Out w showing their love as leos do nd can get moody and closed off when they feel theyre not getting enough attention. its important for leos to remind themselves that just bc people dont show their love as boldly as u doesnt mean they dont love u. cuz ur a sag moon which is another fire sign its likely ur v action oriented when it comes to ur inner self too. ur a big dreamer but u dont let ur dreams b dreams (so 2 speak) u gotta make em happen!!! u long for adventure and to soak up every part of life u can, u hav a deep understanding of cultures and philosophies u may not b that familiar w, u wanna expose urself to as many things as possible. sag moons dont bottle shit up, they say what theyre thinking nd mean what they say, even tho often their thoughts nd feelings might seem extreme to others. ur changeable as fuck, I said this abt aqua moons in a different ask but I think it applies just as much to sag moons if not more but ur emotions r wild nd u cant stand feeling one way for too long, esp not boredom or even comfort, u need to feel Intensely nd feel alive. if u get comfortable in a situation nd it isnt emotionally stimulating anymore, u hav to get tha fuck out. this can lead to rocky relationships. unlike aquas the intensity of ur emotions is far more likely to gravitate towards anger, a fire sign thing (esp cuz ur a leo sag). as a sag moon the way u deal w negative emotions is to get as far away from the situation as possible. u need a change of scenery, mayb u take a walk or visit a friend or in rly bad situations u might literally move somewhere new. u need a fresh start, new challenges constantly. worst nightmares for sag moons is feeling nothing. u ways gotta b emotionally challenged. I imagine u arent the best at comforting others nd dont hav a huge amount of empathy or good advice to give but MAN r u good at cheering others up. ur good moods r infectious, ur sense of fun nd adventure lightens up everyone around u. when someone is upset, ur ability to help them thru the situation emotionally is limited but u will always find a way to cheer them up with ur jokes and fun and a reminder that things can still b good. i imagine a leo sag 2 b captivating as fuck. u take pride in ur appearance, u like to catch peoples eyes. u hav a dramatic, outgoing aura and a persona that is bold and exciting, as well as an innate sense of adventure and desire to see the world. when it comes to ur personality and inner self, what u see is what u get. however cuz ur libra rising its likely ur self expression and the way u show urself to others is far more balanced and u rarely like to express an opinion strongly one way or another. as w all ur signs, ur LIKEABLE, u just want people to like u nd thats such a leo nd libra thing. however leos dont always go abt this the best way, they might come across stuck up nd self centered nd people wont like them nd theyll b upset nd offended. however libras see everyone as an equal nd people see this in u nd like u for it, they like u bc ur pleasant to b around nd never say anything controversial one way or the other. good in arguments bc they see both sides of everything. people might see them as lacking will or self direction bc of their inability to come to their own strong conclusions but the leo sag in u HAS strong opinions, ur libra rising just means u choose not to express them in order to keep everyone on ur side. ur kind nd thoughtful nd hav the ability to see nd kno all sides of a problem, ur lack of strong opinions often comes from a sense of understanding from every perspective. most empathic air sign. u may suffer from a lot of internalised anger from ya fire signs that u dont express to maintain ur balanced persona. u need to recognise its okay 2 not always b on the fence. expressing urself is necessary nd understanding someone elses argument doesnt necessarily mean u agree w it. its okay to disagree w people, its hard for libras to deal w (esp leo libras) but sometimes people just arent gonna agree w ya, nd sometimes people arent gonna like ya either. but thats okay! b urself man. based on all ur signs thats the best advice I can give u!

//no more til I finish the ones ive got!!! also pls b patient we lol it takes me up to an hour to answer each ask nd I put a lot of thought into all of them so if I havent answered urs yet pls b patient im getting there!!!//