Tumgik
#im so glad some of you guys get me on this
Text
ain't no love in oklahoma // op81 smau
description: twisters actress!reader x op81 but lando is convinced oscar is lying (from request)
a/n: sorry for being completely inactive. life happened and it didn't happen in a good way! i have a huge exam coming up soon so i will most likely still be inactive besides maybe a few short things here and there. anyways first oscar fic so enjoy! all pics found on pinterest, i don't own any
a/n pt2: might do something fun for each day in october but im not sure what so send me some ideas. also might do some more headcannons/blurbs soon here!
requests: closed but feel free to send me some messages since i love talking to you guys
masterlist
Tumblr media Tumblr media
liked by oscarpiastri, glenpowell, and 2,927,641 others
youruser: go see twisters!! if you don’t, you suck and you better hope you don’t get stuck in a tornado because there’s useful information in our movie
tagged: glenpowell
view all comments
oscarpiastri: proud of you!!
↳ youruser: 🧡
glenpowell: caption is so real of you
user1: doesn’t yn have a boyfriend? why is she so close to glen?
↳ user2: yes but probably because there’s limited space. yn isn’t like that
↳ oscarpiastri: exactly what user2 said
landonorris: cute!
↳ user3: what are you doing here??
↳ user4: lando in the comments?
user5: such a good movie
user6: yn + glen = power duo
Tumblr media
liked by youruser, landonorris, and 3,951,750 others
oscarpiastri: proud boyfriend award goes to me 🏆 thx for all the bts selfies
tagged: youruser, glenpowell
view all comments
landonorris: i just laughed out loud
landonorris: “boyfriend” lmaooo
↳ user7: i cant tell if he’s joking or serious
user8: cutest couple ever
glenpowell: aww so glad you remembered the time you took me to the aquarium, what a romantic!
↳ youruser: get your own boyfriend capybara
↳ user9: yn CLOCKED him
// lando’s phone//
Tumblr media
//
Tumblr media
liked by mclaren, oscarpiastri, and 4,027,835 others
landonorris: POLE BABYYYY!!! everyone ignore my teammates instagram posts, i have told him to stop. i think he took a hit to the head or something
view all comments
oscarpiastri: do you want to go to the farm or not?
↳ landonorris: you already said i could go so no take backs
↳ user10: lando is going to yn's farm??
↳ user11: LANDO'S MEETING YN?!
↳ user12: oh i know he's going to fangirl so hard
user13: get me someone who looks at me the way oscar looks at lando
↳ user14: are we sure that they aren't the ones dating?
Tumblr media
liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris, and 3,017,426 others
youruser: back home finally! pic 1: yeehaw. pic 2: my cat cora had her babies!!! pic 3: dinner date :)
tagged: oscarpiastri
view all comments
user15: CORA HAD HER KITTIES
↳ youruser: i am officially a grandma. i feel the gray hairs coming in now
user16: oscar and yn are endgame
oscarpiastri: the best company
↳ landonorris: STOP, idk how you got her in on this joke either
↳ user16: i can't tell if lando knows they are actually dating and is joking or if he truly does not believe oscar
user17: boyfriend is back on the feed!
↳ user18: farmer yn is back on the feed!
glenpowell: miss you lady
↳ youruser: you miss my animals more
↳ glenpowell: and what about it.
Tumblr media
liked by youruser, oscarpiastri, and 4,209,384 others
landonorris: OMG HE WASN'T LYING i got to feed so many animals, got to channel my inner cowboy, AND get drunk with the yn? i can die a happy man
tagged: youruser
view all comments
oscarpiastri: believe me now?
↳ landonorris: never doubted you
↳ user19: lando seriously didn't believe oscar lol
↳ user20: i fully thought he was joking the entire time
user21: how hard did you fangirl to meet yn, lando?
↳ landonorris: surprised i didn't pass out honestly. i facetimed GLEN POWELL
youruser: so glad you had a fun time!!
Tumblr media
liked by youruser, landonorris, and 3,298,361 others
oscarpiastri: everyone clear that this is my girlfriend?
tagged: youruser
view all comments
user22: sassy oscar
↳ user23: channeling his inner lando
landonorris: yes sir 🫡
↳ oscarpiastri: stop being weird ?
youruser: MY MANNNNN
↳ user24: oh she's in deep
user25: there is one thing oscar doesn't play about in life: yn
Tumblr media
liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris, and 4,208,763 others
youruser: didn't even know there was confusion that this was my boyfriend lol
tagged: oscarpiastri
view all comments
landonorris: how was i meant to know?!
↳ user26: literally how everyone else knew, instagram.
glenpowell: yn stop posting pics of me and my boyfriend and acting like he's yours
↳ youruser: i dont like this joke.
↳ oscarpiastri: bromance or whatever
↳ user27: they're in a throuple
↳ youruser: ew
↳ glenpowell: disgusting
↳ oscarpiastri: huhhh
user28: couple goals forever and ever
user29: if they don't get married... love isn't real
Tumblr media
840 notes · View notes
poisoncoveredkisses · 18 hours
Text
Heaven Knows I’m miserable now🍂
@sarcastic-cookie @herondale-lightworm @anunstablefangirl @kitsbaby123
More jeremy !!!!!!!!!!!!
Tumblr media
I’d been hours , four long hours…it was dark outside and you were ready for bed ; settled so nicely in your bed , reading and trying…failing…to distract yourself from your ghost boyfriend who’d well…disappeared from the face of the earth. Maybe he’d moved on…? moved onto the next thing…made at peace or something…you’d hoped he hadn’t , you missed him. Rethinking everything, the way his lips felt so perfect against yours . You tried to read a book, only stopping on the same sentence two hundred and three times , Heaven knows I’m miserable now by the Smiths echoing through the dull room .
You were bored…sad and somewhat completely still confused by everything. You heard your bedroom door slowly open before a very breathless and..soaking wet Jeremy appeared.
“there she is..!”Jeremy pants out , “oh i’m so glad you’re here cause i’ve just had to fight the weirdest…” He stops , shaking himself as he laughs out , “i’m human like i’m actually breathing and stuff and i bruise and..oh my god i can actually leave this place ..”
You stare at him, leaving your bed to hug him, “missed you.”
“oh? yeah? i…uh…yeah…i missed you too but listen, baby…i just had to fight the weirdest guy over in..the underworld thing..? like he was not letting me leave but..uh i mean he did let me but-“ You cut him off , lips meeting with his as he freezes, pushing off for a moment.
“you’re warm..”
“yeah i’m alive again so i’m-…you kissed me.”
“yeah..? i missed you.”
“so are we like officially together now..since like…im human and not dead and like totally able to go on dates with you.”
You roll your eyes , pushing his head back to yours as you lead him onto the bed , his hands gripping your thighs as he leans over you, tongues dancing and lips hungrily smashing together. Your hands in his hair , he hums out occasionally; clearly dazed by everything and now the fact he was human and able to kiss his little human girlfriend without a care or a problem….well besides the problem brewing between his hips..
He lifts you a little higher, shifting himself between your thighs as he continues to kiss you , his hands wearily moving from your thighs and under your shirt causing a small hum to leave your lips…
“hm..” He stops for a moment, “i have missed this..”
“oh?” you stop, blinking at him as he hand slowly runs over your chest , your eyes half lidded as you stare at him
“i…i..not like that! i meant being a human…i wasn’t like some total manwhore…i mean this is the closest i’ve gotten to actually touching-…ill just…ill just shut up..”
You giggle at him, moving his head to rest on your chest as your fingers run through his wet hair , sighing out , “you worried me…”
“i know but trust me…i would never leave you..i chose to haunt you when i was a ghost and..i am so gonna haunt you now im alive….you’re gonna have to kill me to get me to leave ..” He smiles up at him, fingers drawing circles into your skin, eyes shining with softness and admiration once again as yours mirror his.
“i think id like it if you haunted me forever, jer…”
“yeah..?”
“mhm…”
You both settle , breathing matching as you stare at each other…mind at peace and body calm under his…you’d have this forever .
22 notes · View notes
zhvakinnn · 2 days
Note
Hello! I apologize if your busy doing something else but could I request a Tyler Hernandez (or other characters if you would like) x reader? Wherein reader has heterochromia but hides by wearing contacts but one day they forget to wear them and Tyler Hernandez (and the other characters you chose) found out.
How would they react? Thank your time and have a great day/noon/night!
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Im so sorryyy I've been busy with exam these few weeks(⁠っ⁠˘̩⁠╭⁠╮⁠˘̩⁠)⁠っ
Btw how was your weeks, good luck with some y'all's exams
Warnings:none?
Characters:Tyler x any gender reader ft. Aiden,Ben, Taylor, Ashlyn,logan
🌺as always i don't know much English so if something is wrong correct me🌺
Tumblr media
The gc was texting to meet up in the park to hangout and you were late they said they will be there at 6:30 but it's already 6:50
You were to busy watching a movie that you didn't notice your phone rang
You were scrambling around the house getting your things and fixing your looks that you forgot the contacts and ran off the house
You got there and saw them just sitting and messing up each others, you sigh of relief and walk towards them
Taylor was the first to notice you and ran up and hug you tightly, you let out a wheezing laugh and looked over to see Tyler looking at your direction staring at you
You laugh and ran up to him and hugged him this time Tyler puts a hand both of your cheeks to make you look straight to him
The other 4 was to busy to realize the situation, "what?, what are you looking at?" You giggled "what happened to your eyes, they're.. different?" Your eyes widen as you quickly hid it
You search your bag and remember you put it on the kitchen counter "shit.." tears started to prickle, you started to feel overwhelmed and noticed everyones attention was on you
"hey you okay?" Ben typed approaching you, you didn't notice Tyler was rubbing your back "im sorry if I said that, I was just curious"Tyler felt guilty and thought he went to far with his words
You 7 sat down and calm down for a moment, "sooo... What's happening?" Aiden smiled looking at your direction while you cover your other eye, you stayed quiet for moment, "I have this thing where my other eye is different color to my other one, I've been wearing contacts so it's the same color"
Tyler squeeze your free hand and smiled at you and said "there's no need to hide that, you know we won't judge you, like Ben we didn't judge that he can't talk" Ben nodded "and like Aiden we didn't judge him even though his kind of autistic" "im not-" "we won't judge you for who are were here for you" Taylor continued
"hey? Im still not-" "were always here for you (name) if somebody mess with your eyes Ashlyns gonna kick someone's ass" Logan said, everyone looked at him and laughed "im still not autistic!"
You laugh with them knowing that your safe with your friends
After a while you didn't cover your eye anymore just chilling in the swing with Tyler while everyone was chicken fighting
"im glad you guys became my friends" your smiled at him as he nodded "im glad you became my friend too.... Hey I wanna ask you something" you hum in question looking at him
"I know we've been friends for like a month but.."
"would you like to go out with me?"
Tumblr media
Waaa it's short but hope you guys loved this
29 notes · View notes
formula-fun · 1 year
Note
Whenever people debate whether Charles should leave Ferrari, it's like, do you even believe in romance???
people will wax poetic about the narrative and then say he should leave in the same breath. If you want that then what's the narrative? if you don't believe in the world it would be stupid to paint it!!! if you dont believe in god, then who are you talking to ???? like
19 notes · View notes
moeblob · 4 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Impulsively shoving a guy's hand in your mouth after having the thought "oh just like when my little sister used to prick herself on a rose thorn" and then immediately being treated like a pet who ate something they shouldn't have? Wonderful. Thank you, Thane.
(also not pictured is Thane apparently trying to scrape your tongue with his hand BEFORE pouring the holy water down your throat because NO. BAD.)
#bewitching sinners#palmier baker#thane verashkova#accidentally ingesting vampire blood because of big brother impulses is wild#also the reason hes so alarmed is bc in that world you kinda soulbond to others and thats how you soulbond as a vampire#you drink each others blood and so hes flipping out because while he hasnt had your blood yet#hey your ex is going to absolutely kill me if we bond on accident and i dont think i wanna die like that!#which is VERY cool to know thank you thane im so glad your concern is actually less of being bound#but about being murdered thats really cool#also the fact thane is found in the library studying with arshem my beloved ex and is BRIBED TO LEARN RECIPES#by arshem with vials of mixed blood hes just CASUALLY CARRYING is like hey man#thank you for being group mum i love you for it#and then later on arshem actually is like oh thane you can drink my blood later since you havent fed for a while#and thane is super chipper about it like HECK YEAH THANKS !#hey boys youre adorable thank you for existing in this incredibly fucked up world#im in a choke hold with this otome im sorry#you ever try to be nice to a guy and think surely this will help him a little bit then you get background lore#and you realize youre probably making things A LOT WORSE FOR HIM by being nice#im going through it with my emotions as i learn about palmiers actions pre game swap so like#dude please i am BEGGING YOU palmier please have ONE redeeming quality in you at some point#i want to adopt one of the love interests as my son though and im obsessed with the fact he can speak fish#my son can speak to the fish and he gives me fish as a present bc i might need it later#and i do actually in fact need said fish later for another quest#thankyou my son i love you and i appreciate you youre amazing#gonna have to draw arshem at some point and everyone will immediately go yeah that makes sense
127 notes · View notes
brinbin-art · 2 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
fellas I think we already won...the future is telling me that also hi tumblr hiiii long time no see B)
60 notes · View notes
crescentfool · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
the persona 3 protagonist 25th anniversary nui in food appliances!
#lizzy speaks#persona 3#minato arisato#makoto yuki#guys friendly reminder that this is what adulthood is about dont listen to anyone who calls you cringe#hence why im putting these in the main tags. i mean they're not incorrect for what the photos are about. lmao#anyway this was a very fun birthday!!! i feel very loved and supported by so many people and i got to do very fun things (like this)...#i think... birthday is like thanksgiving to me. in the gratitude respect.#a reminder of all the lovely people that i have gotten a chance to meet and how i've learned from them#it makes me very happy to have been born... i think every day is a great day to celebrate life's grandeur + brilliance + magnificence#it's just a very poignant and strong feeling that i have that i'm happy to have met so many wonderful people#and while there are some people i've only known for brief periods of time or people who i havent really been good at keeping in contact wit#i do cherish it! im so grateful. so happy that there are people who cheer my silly shenanigans on#while there are ways in which aging makes me go “oh hmm” i think overall i'm happy that i get to keep on living and learning#i have so much fondness for humanity and people... like even if i dont get to talk to ppl directly i just get very emotional yknow#like wow.. you exist.. thats so fucking awesome... i hope you have an awesome day... im glad our paths could cross#if you have read up to this point of my tags.. thank you for reading and being part of my life#i will keep on being the silliest guy ive ever known! cheers to more shenyanigans and self-discovery :3
236 notes · View notes
skitskatdacat63 · 4 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Happy 5/14!!!!
Aaaaahh not sure if this is my best work 😭 I just really wanted to draw smth for vettonso day but my brain hasn't really been functioning well LOL so I kept dreading working on this, especially bcs its so important to me, y'know? I hope it's good????? I'm happy with the concept, but I was just so unsure on so many of the angles and it was killing me. I did the color thing bcs I thought it'd add something interesting to it :) since I didn't paint it as I usually would
Anyways! Process!
Tumblr media
Now I will explain all of them:
Tumblr media
Boy king au is where it all starts of course. I think their relationship is the most developed in this compared to the others, but at the same point, they just start from such a different point, especially affection-wise. All of these kinda have a power dynamic, except the last one, and this is the most imbalanced. Fernando is being subservient, the only part of Seb he may kiss(in public lol) is his hand.
Tumblr media
Matador au next. They hurt themselves when they try to be affectionate, because they live in the culture of a sport of violence and death. The sword separates them, their love for the sport keeps them apart, in fear that they hurt each other. Seb, yet again, looks down upon Fernando. Seb haunts Fernando's whole career, the constant overhanging presence. Also aside from that, shame that you can't see his three musketeers look bcs of the black background 😔
Tumblr media
2012 core!!! I think this one is pretty easy to understand. Both of them often kiss their trophies, more so than any driver. So they're both trying to claim the wdc trophy by kissing it. Maybe you guys should just get rid of the trophy altogether and claim each other! But yes, just like the sword in the matador au one, the trophy and their ambitions divides, keeps them from ever bridging the vast gap between them, at least at that point in time.
Tumblr media
The conclusion! Aka what I wish we will get at Imola 2024- kidding kidding. But it is 2024. Finally there is no conflict between them, there's no big thing keeping them in conflict, they can finally come together. Finally they can touch, there is no gap to bridge, they can appreciate each other, and appreciate what they failed to in years past.
The thesis is basically that they always have their aspirations between them, and their aspirations happen to be basically the same thing. Until those are resolved, the gap between them is too vast for them to recognize and/or find any commonality. How do you get along with someone when you're both fighting for the same thing? How do you get along when it feels like one of you is winning more? How do you get along when there's such a vast gap?
In boy king au, it's going to take a while before they both feel settled about the issue of the throne. That's what makes that au interesting, they're trapped in this state of non-closure and they have to actually solve their issues without the matter of one of them simply removing themselves from the equation. They have to find a way to get over themselves and their aspirations, because like it or not they're stuck with each other. I think with the hand kissing, it represents how Fernando, at that point, is only willing to play along with the game if it's tradition, and he often won't budge in other ways. Yes, I will show subservience, but only in this detached, formal way that I don't connect personally to. He's still holding his own bitterness over meaningfully appreciating Seb. Though it's not like Seb isn't at fault. It takes a while for him to not hold things over Fernando, and constantly humiliate him. One day they will meaningfully show affection, and it won't be some sort of power play.
I think matador au is pretty similar to real life, and the 2010s era(it's basically just their actual plot line but in the context of bullfighting.) They're forever going to have this big elephant in the room, and it only really gets resolved when one of them leaves the sport. Once they're not fighting directly against each other, they realize what they've been missing out on and what they were not appreciating for so many years beforehand. They finally come together because they can't just rely anymore on the sport keeping them together. They actually have to make that step to be in each other's lives, rather than just taking their presence for granted.
Also the text on the comic. "We keep missing, and missing, and missing, and finally kissing." It's basically: we keep missing the point of it all, we keep failing to appreciate each other presence in our lives and in our own individual grand stories. But when we're not forced together anymore, we have to make the choice to come together again ourselves. We keep missing what we actually need to do. Missing each other in favor of our aspirations. Etc etc. One day we will finally embrace and there will be nothing keeping us apart.
51 notes · View notes
game-grumped · 3 months
Text
(Older) Game Grumps Moments I Quote all the Time
27 notes · View notes
meirimerens · 19 days
Note
I would love to listen to your podcast (if you wanna have one) about anything, but something about languages intrigues me. Please, tell me more : )
had to think for a second about what this was about I'm guessing it's my Nopony In This Country Is Pronouncing Przewalski Correctly and now listen..... I have no more to tell you because the like. Concept of languages and within that phonology (the study of the patterns of sounds in a language and across languages) is so wide you wouldn't have enough of a life to say everything about it. Unless you got one thing in mind. But I'm Flattered. Idk if I'd be much of a podcast guy I love visual stimuli. shan't lie I've had for months the idea to do a. Franco-Cantabrian Archeological iceberg... with shit like....... Fontainebleau "water breaking" carving... the Réseau Clastres Only Know Depiction Of [Animal]..... stuff of the sort. but oh well. FLATTERED.... maybe one day. Podcast ideas anyone.
#every few months someone in the patho fandom whos been there a while seems to realize the KH of Khatange or Khodo Khara or even Burakh is#not pronounced K but instead HH and idk if thats because i had the game in russian audio or because i spent hours on the different#Steppe Language pages but im always surprised this is new to some people. like well yeah its the x letter. mostly i dont understand like#not checking the pronounciation if youre unsure. the russian x is not hard to find audio from. its a little like youtubers who go “im not#even gonna try to pronounce this one XD''. but also im glad more people get hashtag aware because i think phonology is such a fantastic#thing to be interested in so. yayyyy.#it just kinda sometimes feels like. A great sense of incuriosity and lack of drive to learn. possibly from fear at a new foreign language.#but above all I'm truly glad more people are hashtag realizing hashtag finding it because truly with the internet pronounciation info#has never been so easy to find. even in english resources. godspeed you!!!!Language learner. Etc.#the wiki has every name (of characters + of places) and every steppe word written in both latin & cyrillic letters by the way that way you#can find what the cyrillic letter of a sound youre unsure of looks like and look it up :D it helped me a lot when i had to find more words#for ATA. good times#tldr it just makes sense To Me when confronted to a phoneme/sound youre unsure the pronounciation of to like. immediately look it up.#so im kinda baffled that ppl may go months being unsure. its not like cyrillic is like. hard to parse its as straightforward as other stuff#ring ring (answers)#anonymous#meiri podcast guy when after all. look at all that yapping
12 notes · View notes
averlym · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media
"careful, or i'll quote that"
#adamandi#was going to be normal but then this scene popped into my head and played on loop and like#guys this scene just makes me Miserable. they're so friends now they're so happy and funny and then later in the show#she manipulates him and he tries to kill her and like. my god beatrix vincent friendship. omg.#im so. it kills me. i realise these arent the most accurate character styles but i Had to get it out. oh my god. literally the other day i#i was like ''oh haha im not going to directly draw scenes from the show im going to be Thinky and Extra'' but no actually sometimes the#the scenes from the show just hit. this line the delivery the Situations it kills me. im so hnnghghf about them#something also maybe about rewatching media knowing the whole plot and the extra Tragedy it all brings also. like to know the ending will#break your heart (but be also some sort of stunning catharsis) and to watch it all!!! again!!!! aaagh.#fun facts about the first time i watched adamandi proper after looking through the tumblrs and half-spoiling it for myself.. i went in with#the strangest assumptions of portia dies/ vincent makes a virus that kills the other nominees instead of actually stabby stabby and the#new invented biological thing would make him the winner a-la frankenstein style //. quincy cuts off his hand????? i am not sure where any#of these came from T-T but im glad i was wrong on literally every count.#miscellaneous brainrots from re-watching.. in the very very start i think vincent is wearing a mask in word to the wise?? like it was probs#a covid safety thing but it makes me go teehee for some reason. like the whole infectious thing was foreshadowed LMAO (approx 35 seconds in#also the balloons. and the admin. and the balloons. the way it's horrific and the balloons gently rain down#and you can see them bounce in the stunned silence. ooo that little detail. what a moment.#also at this point? i have been noticing the little inconsistencies in actions btwn shots but a) they're not seeable unless you're looking#Closely like i was for specific moments as references.. and b) it makes u think about the inconsistency of theatre as a medium and how nth#is ever delivered the same two ways which is really just !!!! to me. smth smth so so many ways to intepret characters and how everything is#always in flux every single cycle. theatre medium my beloved.#last side note from now: i am so abnormal about the marmorius society members who were phaethon nominees in their own right and instead#perished helping ambrose with HIS project. like. that is some sort of love there isn't it? like???? yes they're all bullies and awful but.#i've been reaching tag limit really quickly with all the recent posts. rambles i guess. so so many thoughts. well actual tags now i guess!#vincent aurelius lin#beatrix valeria campbell
41 notes · View notes
can-of-slorgs · 5 months
Note
Im dying at your tags on that last anon 😭😂 youre now the dr.sloth pinup artist that neopets needed
Not the title i wanted to craft for myself when i started this blog but hey, it brought us such good memories like
Tumblr media
15 notes · View notes
paul-simon-juggling · 9 months
Text
☆ Happy Holidays to all my followers!! ☆
To celebrate, here is part one of the SNL Supercut — every single Simon & Garfunkel appearance on Saturday Night Live in the 70s.
I've also included a "Skits n Bits" cut which is just what it sounds like, a supercut of all their comedy sketches and excluding musical performances and other content.
I will be adding all of their other appearances decade by decade to this folder so watch this space!!
25 notes · View notes
fortheturnstiles · 10 months
Text
had an absolute whirlwind of an afternoon in class today finding out my film professor is not only a neil young fan but a monkees fan. and like a real die hard michael nesmith guy . isn’t that wild. and i never would have known if i hadn’t brought up the monkees in a conversation that was not about them because i’m a crazy person. he also brought up chrome dreams which completely sent me into the stratosphere i just love music and i love people who love music and that we can share that together as people . isn’t it wonderful. that’s why we’re all here isn’t it
22 notes · View notes
fooltomery · 5 months
Text
any other nb ppl who are transmasc and ID'd as binary trans for a while have a "im not a man" moment and it was a relief? like thank god i dont have to put up this front anymore type of relief
11 notes · View notes
chilapis · 5 months
Text
Last post before I crash and no-one hears from me until I return from my first final the morrow’s eve (a changed man no doubt) but there’ll never be anything funnier to me than consistently being viewed as a composed and calm saviour by peers while I’m, actively and uncontrollably losing it.
#not said sarcastically or as a vent by the way I genuinely find it so terribly amusing. you think I have it together ? aw <3 you fool.#i’ve been pacing around my room like a starving lion since the past week in whatever free time i’ve had.#and i keep getting people in my messages begging me for last minute help ? which is endearing but. i’m hanging on for dear life myself#helping isn’t foreign to me; i have 4 (?) people in my class who almost exclusively refer to me as ma’am and even refer to me as a teacher.#but helping last minute is so. deeply chaotic.#and I have this issue with me where having others around me makes me immediately drop into a ‘role’ of sorts?#i’ll be freaking out but then someone else starts freaking out around me and my immediate response is to just.#hey. we are going to make it out of this. it’s easy as pie. do you see me worried? no right? <- on the verge of hyperventilating#there’s this one guy in particular who got so excited to find out we have the exact same examination set-up tomorrow.#i gave him like basic pointers and i don’t think i’ve ever been thanked so earnestly and desperately in my life.#i remember during mocks my friends would message me what I wrote in questions and then they’d immediately go oh thank Fuck.#they’d literally just act like they’re absolutely going to pass now just because we had points ​in common.#as if i’m some sort of fucked up correct answer sheet incarnate.#it’s genuinely really sweet to me though; like i’m not posting this ranting or such.#having so much faith in another to the point that you can put yourself completely at ease says. alot i think.#and i’m glad i can be that person for so many.#and I feel like it helps me in a way too because i become so concerned with others that I forget to drown myself in my worries.#i forget that I’m worried because there are others to care about and console and help. so i suppose they help me in a way as well.#but also who is going to be that person for ME. who is going to console ME. im going fucking neurotic /jest#<- woman with ego issues & control issues who would rather die than accept help.#sigh. oh well. I’m sure we’ll do just fine. cannot wait#🥀🍷 — colloquy.
7 notes · View notes