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luckyqueenreign · 2 years

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The Story of Us - is a four-part series that will delve into MC (Gemma) and Suresh's relationship pre-villa.

If you missed and of the previous parts click here to read Part One + Part Two + Part Three

PART FOUR: The Hardest Part

So step right out, there is no amount Of crying I can do for you All this time We always walked a very thin line You didn't even hear me out (you didn't even hear me out) You never gave a warning sign (I gave so many signs)

Tag List: @squishy-noodles @hi-im-karla @kunepie @brasister @kvngdomheartz @whati390 @smexilexi420 @viperidae94 @misterytull @theesocialintrovert @kiwi-tai @future-mrs-suresh @ordoesshemouthfuckyouforever @kikithegr8 @fujihime-litg @0shewrites0 @roundbrownlover @katsie

NC-17 🥵🌶

Thank you thank you to my bra 💖 @katsie for being my editor and fixing my dumb mistakes and leaving way too many reaction emojis on the google doc..love you ❤️

The hardest part of finding love and finding that one person you can’t live without, is learning to live without them.

Suresh was lost. Figuratively and literally. He’d been driving home from his parents house, after celebrating his mother’s birthday, and he realized that he’d never gotten off on his exit. He looked at the time, he’d driven almost an hour out of his way in a daze.

Fuck. I’m lost.

He pulled his car over, wrapping his large arms over the steering wheel and rested his head on top of his hands. He closed his eyes and was transported back to this afternoon, to the chorus of “Where’s Gemma?” ringing out the second he walked in the door, only to be replaced by despondent, sad faces when he revealed the truth. They were done. Over. No more. Finished. His mother’s disappointment somehow shattered him even more than he already was. It had been two weeks. Two weeks of no Gemma, no laughter, no love, only pain and hurt. Pain and hurt that he’d caused, that he’d been the catalyst of. He tried calling and texting her, he sent her a florist shop amount of flowers and called all of her friends begging them to convince her to speak to him, but she ignored every attempt. As he sat in his car now, he thought about typing her address into the GPS and driving to her apartment. He almost stopped himself, but deep down he knew he would never have been able to do that. He needed to see her, whether she wanted to see him or not.

When he arrived he noticed the lights were off and she didn’t seem to be home, but he still tried her doorbell. No answer. He tried again. Still no answer.

Wait for her. She has to come home sometime.

The autumn air was cold and pricked his skin. His lower back was starting to hurt from standing and shivering, but he refused to turn back and give up on her. After a few hours, he saw her car turn onto her street and his chest tightened in anticipation of seeing her for the first time since they broke up. He was partly hidden by the shadow of the awning, so Gemma didn’t see him right away, but he saw her. She looked absolutely stunning as she stepped out of the car, too pretty to have just come home from work, and then he noticed she was not alone. Gemma smiled at her new male companion, but the smile didn’t reach her eyes. There was a sadness in them that he knew he was the main culprit for. She took his hand and they made their way to the door, but then she spotted him. She stopped dead in her tracks, her feet frozen to the ground as she stared up at him. The fake smile she plastered on her face formed into a deep scowl. She looked at Suresh with determination and turned to her date, pulling him in for a deep, passionate kiss. Even he seemed surprised by it, but returned it with enthusiasm. Suresh felt like he’d been punched in the gut and had the wind knocked out of him. He couldn’t breathe seeing Gemma kiss another man. And he knew what would come next. She broke away from the kiss, then grabbed her date's hand and walked with him up the stairs.

“Gem…” Suresh tried.

But Gemma refused to look at him. She focused on her keys and twisting them through the lock, leaving him alone in the cold.

“Who was that?” the new guy asked as they made their way inside.

“No one important,” she laughed and closed the door behind her.

Suresh’s blood was boiling. He balled up his fists at his side as his heartbeat quickened, and his chest felt like it was going to explode.

Is she fucking serious right now? No one important. Over a year, and what? I’m just nothing to her now? No one important? One mistake and she can just throw us away. To go and fuck some loser who doesn’t deserve her. Fine, Gemma. Two can play that game.

A storm raged on in Suresh’s mind as he entered The Social for the first time in weeks. Suresh hadn’t been single for over a year and his little black book had been limited to only Gemma, until “the incident.” He didn’t know where else to turn to look for eligible women but he did know one that might still be interested in him, if he played his cards right.

“Thought I’d seen the last of you, Mr. Fraser,” Gabi cooed, batting her eyelashes at him.

“Maybe I was playing hard to get.” He winked.

Gabi leaned in close to him and whispered, “I’m off in ten minutes…”

He grinned. “Then I’ll have a whiskey neat while I wait.”

Gemma wasn't spending her nights alone so neither would he.

Fuck. She's moved on. He thought. She doesn't care about me anymore. Maybe she never did... No one important.

“Alright handsome, your place or mine?” Gabi had come around the bar, now leaning on the counter as she stared up at him and chewed on her bottom lip. Suresh downed the rest of his drink.

“Let’s go to yours,” he volunteered.

He couldn’t take her to his apartment. Not when it still had so many memories of Gemma all over the place. Her pictures still littered every wall in his apartment, her toiletries still invaded every shelf in his bathroom, and he swore that her side of the bed still smelled like her. He couldn’t bring her back to his place and risk losing Gemma’s scent.

No one important. No one important. No one important.

Gabi pounced on him the second they entered her tiny studio apartment, crashing her lips onto his as she pressed her body into him. It didn’t fit his like Gemma’s did, everything about her was different. The way she smelled and tasted was so foreign to him, but he didn’t care. Not tonight. Not when he knew someone else would be touching Gemma the way he should’ve been.

No one important.

“Take your clothes off,” he growled.

No sooner than the words were out of his mouth, her top was falling to the ground and she was sliding her skirt off. He did the same, ripping off his own clothes in a hurry and moving closer to Gabi, who was now waiting for him on the bed. His muscular body towered over her, his gaze burned with a mixture of desire and anger.

No one important.

He swept her in a long, passionate kiss, lacing his fingers through her hair and letting them explore her body.

No one important. No one important. No one important. Those three words haunted him and whenever he started to get clear of it, they lashed out at him with a fresh wave of pain.

He groaned in annoyance, but Gabi didn’t seem to notice. He really needed to get his mind off Gemma, so instead he tried to focus on Gabi, kissing her hard. He slid two thick fingers into her slit, and she welcomed him with a soft moan.

“Mmm,” she panted. “Suresh.”

As he increased the pace, her cries intensified, and her body wriggled under his touch.

“Yes…oh my god…don’t stop.”

He quickened his pace further as her moans grew louder until she screamed out his name as she came all over him. He snapped his fingers out and plunged into her so suddenly and so deep that she screamed out in pleasurable surprise.

No one important. No one important. No one important.

He let out a low growl before starting to thrust into Gabi with a ferociousness he didn’t know he possessed. It left him wondering if she’d be able to handle him, handle his size. With each thrust he felt her orgasm closing in as she clenched around him. He grabbed her thighs, pushing himself deeper into her still as she arched her back and met his thrusts.

No one important. No one important. No one important.

Underneath him Gabi screamed as pleasure surged through her body as she neared her climax.

Focus.

But all he could see was Gemma. And instead of pushing her away he leaned into her memory. He thrust into Gabi, picturing the last time he held Gemma in his arms. He steadily drove into her now, his breathing intensifying with each stroke.

“I’m so close,” she screamed.

He crashed his lips onto hers. He didn’t want her to speak. He didn’t want to hear her voice, to break his image of Gemma in his mind. With one final thrust, Suresh let out a low growl as he came.

“G…”

He collapsed onto the bed next to her, trying to catch his breath while Gabi stroked his arm. She inched closer to him, lazily draping her leg over his.

“That was…amazing,” she purred.

“Mmm…” He smiled back. He didn’t know what to say, but her leg suddenly felt too heavy on his, and her studio apartment walls felt too small, like they were closing in on him.

He looked down at his watch and feigned shock at the time. “Shit, it’s already 1:30? I have a deposition in the morning, so I should head out.”

Gabi looked slightly disappointed as she moved her leg off of him.

He slinked away from her, grabbing his clothes and dressing quickly. She grabbed an oversized shirt from a drawer and draped it over her body as she walked with him towards the front door.

“I’ll text you,” he said as she smiled back up at him.

And he did, about a week later, when the emptiness and void that Gemma left got too unbearable to handle on his own. And again he left in the middle of the night citing excuses of early morning meetings on the other side of town. This became their pattern for a few weeks and before he knew it, it’d been over two months.

“Resh…it’s late. Don’t go,” she whispered, and moved to climb on top of him.

He chuckled in the dark. He was exhausted, but in the two months they’d been seeing each other he had yet to spend the night.

“I wish I could, but I don’t have a toothbrush or a change of clothes, and I have to be up early tomorrow.”

“Hold that thought!” She excitedly jumped out of bed and raced over to the bathroom. She returned with a small bag from Boots, and handed it to him.

“What’s this?” he asked.

“Open it!” She beamed at him.

He looked inside the bag to find a brand new toothbrush and dental kit. He looked up at her and smirked. “Wow, you really thought of everything, didn’t you?”

She smiled shyly and shrugged, but he leaned in and gave her a small kiss on the lips.

“Ok, I’ll stay. But I do have to leave quite early so don’t be mad if I wake you,” he said smiling.

Three Months Later

He was comfortably numb. Dull. Complacent. Gabi was a perfect distraction to the hollowness he felt inside. She didn’t make his life difficult like Gemma had, there were no complications with her. She was easy going and didn’t ask too many questions. For one, the fact that she never complained about never having been invited to his apartment in the five months they'd been dating. She didn’t seem to mind that he didn’t text her all day, or sometimes even for a few days in a row, if he was too busy at work. And they carried on this way until one afternoon.

“You know, babe… We’ve been seeing each other for like… five months now and we never leave my apartment or the bar. I’ve never been to yours, and we’ve never really had a proper date.”

He was snuggled up close behind her on the couch and he gave her a reassuring squeeze.

“I’m sorry Gab, work has been so crazy these last few months. I’ve taken on double the workload basically and it’s been so hard to make plans outside of that.” The lie rolled off his tongue with ease. “Why don’t we go out for dinner tonight, somewhere nice. I’ll make a reservation now.”

“Really? OK! I’ll go get ready!”

He took out his phone while she went to change, and scanned the restaurants he had taken Gemma to so many times before. If he was honest with himself, the reason he never took Gabi to any of these restaurants was because he hated the thought of being there with someone other than Gemma. So he found a brand new restaurant that had only recently opened and made a reservation for two.

Perfect. No memory of Gemma.

They arrived at the beautiful, dimly lit restaurant, and took their seats in the center of the room.

“Suresh, this place is so nice! I love it!” Gabi beamed as she looked around.

It’s so easy to impress her.

“You were right, Gab. We should’ve done this a long time ago,” he said, taking her hand and smiling at her.

“So tell me, we haven’t talked much about your previous relationships before me.”

“Before you?” he asked, slightly confused.

“Yes…any messy breakups? Ex-girlfriends that broke your heart?”

He shifted in his seat uncomfortably. For five months he’d done his best to guide his thoughts away from Gemma. Her ghost haunted him less and less frequently, and he was getting to the point where he believed he was finally ready to move on. Maybe he was finally over her.

“I’ve only had one serious relationship. Gemma. We dated for over a year but things ended badly on my account and I’ve learned my lesson from it. I won’t lie, it was hard at first to get over her, but honestly I feel like I’m in a great place now. My career is skyrocketing and my winning streak has never been this good. I just made an offer on a new apartment and I can’t wait to move in…”

“And you have me,” she interrupted with a smile.

“Yes, and I have you,” he said with a laugh.

“So you’re over her then?”

“Oh, god yes. Completely.”

“Good. I’ve been thinking about us lately, and maybe taking our relationship to the next level and wanted to…”

Gabi's voice was drowned out by an all too familiar sound that he hadn't heard in months, that he hadn't realized how much he missed. Gemma’s laugh.

But it can’t be her laugh. Gemma can’t be here tonight. Right?

His heart started to beat out of his chest as he followed the sound, and then finally he saw her. She was walking down the large marble staircase from the restaurant’s second floor with her parents by her side. Her dad held her mom’s hand, and whatever separation they had been going through before seemed to have been resolved in the months since their break up. But all he could see was her. He couldn't take his eyes off of her. She looked stunning. She looked happy. She didn’t have the same fake smile plastered on her face like she did on that night she’d rejected him and left him standing on her doorstep. The night it all ended for him, that made him realize there was no coming back from what he’d done. This was a real smile, a real laugh.

God, I missed you, Gem.

“Suresh, did you hear what I said?” Gabi asked.

“Yes, of course,” He had no idea what she had said, he’d stopped listening to her the second he heard his favorite laugh in the world. The laugh that still made him weak in the knees, that could right all the wrongs in the world. He needed to hear that laugh again. He wanted to be the reason she laughed like that again.

Fuck. I still love her.

He watched them as they were leaving, and he was left with the bitter truth that he wouldn't get a chance to see her again. To talk to her. To make her laugh. How would she react if she saw him here now? His chest ached as he nursed the idea that she would probably look away in disgust.

“Are you listening to me? You seem distracted…” Gabi turned around to follow his eye line but by the time she did, Gemma and her parents were gone.

“Yes!” He cleared his throat. “I just thought I saw a former client of mine. What were you saying?”

“About us! I’m really starting to fall for you…how are you feeling?”

Fuck…

Her confession alarmed him. It was never supposed to get to that. And seeing Gemma? Even if he didn't want it to, it changed everything.

“Of course I like you too, Gabi. I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t, right? Don’t be silly.”

But Gabi had reason to ask, she had reason to worry. Even in the minutes since he’d seen Gemma, his whole mood shifted. The hollowness, the emptiness that he had been trying to avoid seemed to grow inside him again. He spent the rest of the dinner trying to take his mind off of Gemma, but he was failing miserably. He couldn’t get her smile or her laugh out of his mind. And the harder he tried, the more memories seemed to rush back in with that same smile, that same laugh. That godforsaken, painful, beautiful, gut wrenching laugh. Suresh knew then that he was still in love with Gemma, and anything he thought he had going on with Gabi was done.

“Let’s grab the check,” he said with a small smile.

As they walked out of the restaurant, Gabi grabbed his hand and laced her fingers through his. Something that had felt normal just hours before, now felt so strange.

“Resh, I was thinking maybe tonight we can finally go to your place?” She looked up at him expectantly and he knew this was the last time he was ever going to see her face. He couldn’t keep seeing her anymore, not after tonight. But he couldn’t break up with her right here, he’d find another way.

“I can’t tonight. Actually I can’t come over either. I have this case I’m working on. It requires my full attention right now.”

Gabi couldn’t hide the disappointment in her eyes. “OK, I understand. Listen, don't worry about dropping me off, I’m going to meet my friends down the street. They invited me out earlier but I said I was with you, but since my night cleared up I’m going to meet them.”

“Are you sure?”

“Positive,” she said icily.

Suresh turned to her and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek before he jumped into his car.

Six Weeks Later

“I still don’t understand why you couldn’t just call Gabi and break up with her like an adult.” Simon glared at his best friend. “She’s reached out how many times now? And you just ignore her every time?” He was one of Suresh’s closest friends, and always told him how it was. He was also the reason Suresh and Gemma ever got together. After Simon's girlfriend Chloe, also Gemma's best friend, had dragged her along to his birthday party and the two met for the first time.

“She stopped reaching out two weeks ago,” Suresh huffed.

“But she’s still looking at your Instagram stories, and she knows we’re here. What if she just shows up to confront you for ghosting her?”

“Gabi’s not really fussed,” Suresh said running his fingers through his hair.

“Gabi’s not really fussed?” Simon snapped. “The second I walked into her bar the other day she asked where the hell you’ve been.”

“You didn’t tell me that. You’re supposed to be my best friend, what happened to bro code. What did you say?”

“I told her the truth…I didn’t want to get involved in your mess and if she wanted to speak to you, she should reach out. But I didn’t realize, you’ve literally been ignoring her all this time.”

“It’s just…” Suresh sighed as he looked down at the drink in front of him. “It’s Gemma, man.”

“Gemma?! What do you mean?” Simon asked incredulously.

“Ever since I saw her that night at the restaurant I can’t get my mind off of her.”

Simon took a long sip of his drink, then circled the glass with his thumb and groaned. “I don’t know if this is my place to tell you,” he hesitated.

“What?” Suresh asked.

“It’s about Gemma…”

“Out with it already!”

“Gem and Chlo had a girls’ brunch date, that turned into day drinking, that turned into them coming back to mine and Chlo’s. They were absolutely wasted, watching TV, gossiping, and having even more wine when a commercial came on with some bloke, Rocco selling aftershave. Apparently he was on Love Island… Well this got the girls talking about whether they would ever do it. And then Gemma said she was going to apply.”

“Oh. Well, don't thousands of people apply every year?”

“Yes, they do, but yesterday she got a call from a producer. They want her to come in for a screening.”

“Wait, what?”

“Yeah Resh… and you know Gemma better than anyone. She’s passing that screen test. They’re going to love her.”

“Well, if they want her, then they’ll definitely want me, too.”

Simon eyed up his friend with uncertainty. “Where are you going with this?"

“I can go on and win her back, mate,” Suresh said.

“Suresh, what? You’re not thinking of actually applying, are you? That’s not why I told you.”

“Why not? Imagine how the producers are going to feel when one of their favorite girls has an ex who wants to come in and win her back. They’re going to eat that drama up.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Suresh.”

“I need to try. I’ve done everything else and she won’t speak to me. If she’s going on Love Island that means she’s ready to find something again. Why can’t it be me?”

“You’re going to humiliate yourself on national television! No INTERNATIONAL television, they air this show in so many countries. You’ll be a worldwide laughing stock.”

“I don’t care. It’s Gemma. I have to try.”

#litg suresh #litg ex in the villa #love island the game #litg mc #litg s5 #litg #litg fanfiction #litg eitv #litg ff #litg season 5 #litg fanfic #litg gemma x suresh #litg gemma #the story of us #exinthevilla #ex in the villa #love island the game: ex in the villa

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bopeeboo · 2 years

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What colour is the photo frame closest to you?

purple!

Are your pets asleep right now, if you have any?

i have to pets, they are probably sleeping right now.

Would you have any idea what your parents are doing right now?

my mom is probably taking a shower or watching tv.

How many windows (roughly) does your house have?

like 11?

Do you have a good relationship with your cousins?

not anymore... is very sad. i even considered them my siblings at some point of my life.

What was the last kids movie you saw?

i really have no idea.

Do you know anyone who was born in Africa?

nope

Have you ever been to an internet cafe?

i think when I was little!

Are there any upcoming events for you to look forward to?

i think we are doing something for Thanksgiving. that seems interesting

Has the year gone quickly for you so far?

kind of

How many siblings does your significant other have?

Are you one of those people who can drink vodka straight?

definitely not lol

Have you ever done three or more shots in a row?

nooo

Do you share a middle name with any of your friends?

nope

What was the last movie you saw in theatres?

Wakanda, the one from 2017/2018. I would like to go again:(

Are you interested in international politics?

not really:S

How many pairs of jeans do you own?

lots haha

When was the last time you showered?

two hours ago. i feel very cold rn

Do you know the name of the pharmacist at your local drug store?

yeah:P i live in a small town

What was the first cellphone you had and how old were you when you got it?

Do you use public transport in your town or city?

Have your parents ever worked in a factory?

Do you have several best friends?

How many lights are in the room you’re in?

these fairy lights or my room. they are comfy and make me feel safe:'(

Is there a Hard Rock Cafe in your town or city?

no. there's nothing in here

Do you eat fast food more than once a week?

i barely do

What flavour is your toothpaste?

toothpaste haha. those green ones

Have you ever shared a shower or bath with someone as an adult?

nop

When was the last time you had a bubble bath?

i don't remember! i did when I was little

Are you sleepy right now?

very, but I shouldn't sleep. is very early);

How big is your backyard?

is very small...

Do you know anyone with Tourette’s Syndrome?

i don't think I do

What time does your alarm wake you up in the morning?

6:00 but Im awake before that

What was the last zoo you visited?

Do you like crime films and tv shows?

i used to like documentaries, but I'm not interested anymore. this Jeffrey Dahmer is fading slowly and I'm thankful.

When you shop, do you take a basket or a cart (trolley)?

yeees

Have you ever tasted milk straight from the cow?

no lol

What’s your favourite sleeping position?

hugging pillows!

What colour is the bra you’re wearing?

I'm not wearing one

Have you ever seen A Clockwork Orange?

need to!

Do you like to make games out of chores to make them more enjoyable?

hell no. that wouldn't help me 😞

Is there anything in your possession that probably shouldn’t be?

yea;p

What is your favourite flavour of yoghurt?

i really don't like yoghurt. is very hard to me to find an ok one

What was the first online account you remember having?

Kik maybe

Do you listen to music to fall asleep?

sometimes I do, when i feel like listening to something relaxing and soft before falling.d

Where did you go last time you left your town or city?

to buy the groceries ha

Do you use emojis?

sometimes

Have you ever wanted to be a lawyer?

yes:'( but it seems like is something that would be hard for me

What percentage of battery does your phone currently have?

18%

What was the last type of soda you drank?

probably coca cola. i don't like soda in general:s

How far away from your house is your favourite place to shop for clothes?

an hour away. kind of

Do you have supplies handy right now to draw something if I told you to?

not handy

Have you ever been married?

no haha

What does your deodorant smell like?

pomegranates idk is what the photo shows

Is your bedroom more messy or clean at the moment?

is ok haha

Do you use Twitter?

ugh no. is brain damaging. that thing

Are you any good at baking cakes and cookies from scratch?

i would like to cook pastries morec':

Is there a floor lamp in your bedroom?

nope

Have you ever been to another continent?

nope

Do you have any hidden piercings? (this includes bellybuttons)

What month is your birthday?

April!

What can you hear right now?

silence and cars passing

#n22

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deeeelightfuldee · 2 years

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How long was your longest make-out? ummm... one of my exes and I would makeout for long lengths of time regularly. idk how long but it felt like a long time and not a long time at the same time. he was a great kisser, ill give him that. Have you ever sucked in helium and talked funny? of course Would your parents disown you if you got pregnant? lol i mean it doesnt make an ounce difference to me what my dad would think. mom would be shocked I did so without being married, just because thats my desire. Have you ever seen the last person you kissed without their shirt on? definitely have. Honestly, if you wanted to get laid right now, could you? yes. According to your ex, you are: difficult to pin down, guarded, patient. Have you ever used your bra to hold things like you would a pocket? if im in a gross restroom and i dont have pockets ill toss my phone in there sometimes. Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend? What’s their name? I don’t currently. i venture to say i will again this year. When you first met your current bf/gf (or most recent), did you think it would end up the way it is? no, i can’t say i figured it would go this way. we are so great in person but there were other things that needed to be ironed out and i think distance was challenging in that aspect. Is he what you “normally go for?” yea i would say so. Does he ever take you shopping or spoil you rotten? he would take me on really nice dates where he would buy food and movie tickets and such for me. but we never shopped. i don’t think he was that kind of a spender. Do you know anyone who has diabetes? yes Have you ever had to block anyone online? i’m constantly finding accounts of K’s ex that i block. -.- Name three things in your room that others probably don’t have in theirs: A picture of themselves and their pets made into a bobs burgers cartoon. a piece of art of the vocal folds. 5 fans. What’s something you can cook or bake like a pro? cookies, pie, biscuits and gravy Do you tend to flirt a lot, even when the person isn’t single? No, i used to be much more flirtatious. I’m not lately, but no i dont like to flirt with taken men Besides furniture, what’s the biggest thing in your bedroom? my TV probably. What’s something that you think is really cute? benny What’s a pretty bird? gosh so many breeds. i just dont pay attention to the names. Have you ever hacked into somebody’s account? no, definitely not my thing. id rather not know. What’s something good that’s on your mind right now? fourth of july is coming up. Halloween costume idea for this year? really nothing lol Do you want to go to pregnancy classes? probably not but if my husband wanted to, i would Do you ever cringe at the thought of living in a disgusting house? i am an extremely neat person so no, it doesn’t cross my mind all that often. How often do you let cleavage show? i mean i dont overdo it. Does anyone call you babe or baby? K tries. Z tries. i only like it if im dating the person. Last night, you felt? annoyed. sad. What are you looking forward to? fourth of july. Do you own any shirts that cost over 100$? LOL no. How far away from your town/city is your state’s capital city? three hours! Have you ever worked somewhere where you had to clean the toilets? Yes and that was just so wrong. What are your three top favourite flavours of ice cream? chocolate peanut butter from oberweis moose tracks salted caramel

Do you know what your neighbours even look like? yes of course How many siblings does your best friend have? depends on who this person is. im in such a weird spot with this. if it’s Em then she has one bro and one sis. Do you put ketchup on your fries? sometimes. its not like a must have. Have your parents ever worked in the agriculture business etc. on a farm? no Where was your mom born? chicago

What is your significant other’s middle name? im currently single What’s one thing you think about regularly? future plans What kind of exotic animal would you like to have as a pet? a wild cat lol Who is your favorite athlete? uhhhhhhhhhh id have to think about this for a bit. Who has helped you out the most in the past 6 months? to be entirely honest, the last 6 months have been some of the most isolating, lonely times i’ve had. I don’t look on hardly anyone as having been extra helpful Are you happy with your love life right now? not yet but i think its around the corner Do you want to have more friends than you have right now? i would like to have a really close friend. Do have false finger nails? No i dont have that kind of money Are you on speaking terms with your parents? with my mom Are your parents religious? my parents have faith Do you want a church wedding? I think I want an outdoor wedding. What do you typically have for breakfast? i skip it 9/10 times Favourite foreign food? mexican? probably Can you name all 50 states of America? heckn yea Do you want a boy or girl if you have a kid? both! multiples of each Goriest movie you’ve ever seen? uhhh idk i dont like gore. Ever seen a pregnant woman smoking/drinking? yes. a manager I used to work with. Do you hate when people talk to you about their relationships? no, not at all. Random embarrassing fact about yourself? hmmm. uhhhh lemme think on that. Do you wear makeup? I do. i enjoy it Do you like cats? o frick yea What’s your favorite GameBoy game, if you have one? mario ones Are most of your friends Christian? id say probably so Have you ever been so lonely, you cried? yes Do you try to stand out, or be like everyone else? i dont make a conscious effort either way. I just want to do whatever is aligned with who i am Are you the type to read a book at a time, or a few? one at a time Do you believe, deep down, that we are all the same? no, i dont think so Do you like reading just the first book in the series, or all of it? If the first one sucks, no i wont read the rest. What are you listening to at the moment? gilmore girls When was the last time you cried? sunday night/monday morning Where is the person who has your heart at the moment? im just kind of heart-empty Who or what do you feel the deepest responsibility towards? ooooo. good question. I’m currently trying to stop my feelings of responsibility over K. Who would you be afraid to have angry at you? ummmm im not currently aware of anyone i would be afraid of. unless of course they were yielding a weapon of some sort. Have you ever eaten any kind of food off of someone else’s body? uhhhhh yes lol York Peppermint Patti or Reece’s Peanut butter Cups? reese’s What store would you most like a $10,000 (about 5900 British pounds) gift certificate to? lol like an apartment complex, or a car dealership, or like crate & barrel lol. maybe target so i can get all the things. What band T-shirts do you own? nothing much to my knowledge. im not entirely sure. Have you ever taken a lock of someone else’s hair? uh no. thats bizarre. Have you ever given anyone a lock of your hair? lol no. no one has asked for it. If you had a locket what would you put inside? Great question Is blood a turn on for you? no, not at all. Have you ever written anything in your own blood? No. idk why this is such a weird thing all of the sudden Could you possibly fall in love with a prostitute? im sure anything is possible, but i dont think i could act on a relationship with a prostitute because it would be way too dangerous and uncomfortable.

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creepytoes88 · 3 years

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Angry sex with Vinnie

So this is a very bratty reader and there is hitting in this I AM NOT ROMANTICIZING ABUSE! I can NOT stress this ENOUGH

THIS IS A EXTREMELY DEGRADING SMUT

But this might be one of my favorites I choose Bryce cus he’s problematic so it seemed realistic to me just imagine him and Addison aren’t a thing lol COVID DOESN’T EXIST IN ANY OF MY STORIES Covid makes me sad 😢 OK LOVE YOU GUYSSSSS ♥️🤌🥸

I’m almost done getting ready when I hear Vinnie come in the room. Vinnie and I are going to Jake pauls ( he literally has nothing to do with the story) party or one of the biggest parties in LA everyone gets shit-faced and either you have to crash there or you have to get a Uber. Needless to say, I'm scared shitless but I'm not gonna let Vinnie know that he's way too excited for me to bail on him. So I just keep getting ready and keep telling myself tonight's gonna be great, because it is gonna be great. Vinnie comes into the bathroom with his hair maintained and non-frizzy no matter how much I wanted to run my hands through it, I also knew Vinnie would KILL me so I resisted.

”Hey you,” I say with a smile ”Hey you look hot,” Vinnie says looking me up and down, I stopped and turned around with a straight face ”and absolutely breathtaking just say the word, and ill go ring shopping m’lady. Vinnie says with a shit-eating grin as he bows to me I smile ”well now that you mention it...” I place my finger on my chin pretending to think about it ” I would love a ring pop” I continue to do my make up as Vinnie chuckles. He walks up behind me wrapping his hands around my hips rubbing his thumbs on my dress before leaning into my ear

”you look amazing baby” he kisses the side of my neck ” I could take you right now,” Vinnie says in a deep voice. I turn around putting my hand on his chest ”don’t even think about it, I love you but we have to leave in 20 minutes and I'm still not done with my make-up.” I turn around again continuing to do my make up I feel a slap on my ass. I gasp at the sting of the hit ”such a brat.” Vinnie kisses your neck again before leaving the bathroom It's gonna be a long night.

Time skip to party

As soon as we pull up to the party a group of Vinnie's friends immediately take him away to play beer pong. I roll my eyes as I walk to Maddy and Avani, we get drinks and walk to the dance floor, about an hour has passed, and was done dancing and kinda just wanted to check on Vinnie. I stand up and tell the girls I'm gonna find Vinnie they nod and I walk in the direction he went when the boys pulled him away. Just more dancing people but no Vinnie, ok maybe the back yard I walk towards the back door and as I step out did I hear the most the last thing I wanted to hear ”KICK HIS ASS VINNIE” I hear people yelling ”FUCK YEA, GET HIM VINNIE ” I see Jordan and Kio high-five as they encourage Vinnie to beat the crap of someone. I run over to Jordan and Kio ”What the fuck is wrong with you guys stop him!” I screech at them Jordans head whips around with scared eyes as he runs to me and grabs me ”stop you didn’t see what happened and what Bryce said!” ” He fucking deserves it!” Kio yells kinda drunk.

Vinnie's POV

After the boys came and pulled me away from Y/n we played pong and shotgun a couple of claws (gross) before I know it I was feeling the alcohol. As I'm talking to Jordan and Kio I feel a slap on my shoulder ”ssssssup man” Bryce wraps his arm around my shoulder. I could smell the alcohol on his breath not that his slurring wasn't enough evidence to show he's drunk off his ass. ”hey bro what's up?” I ask

”not much but *burp* I do wanna tell you *hiccup* that Y/n looks like a million dollars tonight man” I look at him as I try to keep me cool knowing he's just drunk ”Like honestly dude*hiccup* if you weren't dating her I would totally hit it *hiccup* like her ass is perfect man, and her tits dude. Does she ever wear a bra I can always see her *hiccup* nips but it makes me so horny man?” Bryce laughs as he claps me on the back. I look at Jordan and Kio who look at me shocked, unfortunately for Bryce, I was far too buzzed to even think about what I was doing before my fist collided with his face.

Y/n’s POV

I push my way through the crowd and when I get to the front I see Vinnie on top of Bryce trying to curve his face in, both of his fists pounding into Bryce's face. ”VINNIE STOP” I scream immediately he stops and turns around seeing my scared face he stands up coming towards me but I walk past him going straight to Bryce and start to shake him. I hear him groan ”are you ok?” I ask as he slowly opens his eyes ”look I'm in Heaven” Bryce says with a wink before passing out all the sudden I'm being pulled up by my arm like a child. I look up to see an extremely angry Vinnie I could see him shaking with anger. ”ow Vinnie you're hurting me” I whine as I try to pry his hand off of my arm ”VINNIE STOP” I yell at him in front of everyone.

”YOU CAN’T JUST GET JEALOUS, BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF PEOPLE! AND THEN YOU WANT TO DRAG ME OUT OF THE PARTY LIKE A FUCKING KID I THINK THE FUCK NOT!” I yell at him with sass. As soon as the words leave my mouth I see his usually sweet and loving eyes change before me becoming almost emotionless. They fill with absolute rage Vinnie narrows his eyes at me picking me up and throwing me over his shoulder holding my legs so I can't kick him.

”PUT ME THE FUCK DOWN RIGHT NOW!” I pound my fists into his back and scream having an absolute tantrum, I'm so angry that I'm seeing red, not a few minutes later I was put on the ground.

Before I could push him away I was turned around and push against the car ”such a fucking brat!” He slaps my ass

”fuck you,” I say as I try to get my hands free I hear the car door open then the back of the seat being moved. Vinnie sits in the car pulling me I'm with him so I'm sitting on his lap and start to push on his chest to get away I know what's about to happen and I know it gonna hurt a lot. ”STOP YOU FUCKING BRAT!” Vinnie yells and finally holding my hands behind my back. Vinnie looks up at me and chuckles he holds my hands with one of his own, his other hand pulling on his belt wrapping my wrists together ”NO DON’T DADDY IM SORRY!” I say as tears start filling my eyes and my bottom lip quivers.

Vinnie looks up at me his eyes showing no emotion ”I'm not gonna hit you till I'm calm-” My eyes widen ”NO FUCK YOU!” I yell as I try to get away even though I know I can't but I don't want a spanking. I know Vinnie won't touch me till we’re home and it's a long-ass drive at least an hour or two depending on traffic meaning I'm gonna be hot and bothered AND my ass is gonna be on fire. I feel a harsh slap on my right cheek I let out an involuntary moan grinding against him ”STOP talking to me like that.” Vinnie rubs my cheek turning my face towards him ”you’ve made daddy very mad and after your punishment, we will be having a conversation about tonight right now I need you to take your punishment like a good girl.” Vinnie says softly rubbing my cheek I know he's trying to make a point about my attitude and he’s somehow being so sweet. I wish I could say it was me being extremely horny and slightly tipsy but honestly, it was just my pride I don't wanna admit that I'm wrong, for talking to him like that and hitting him in anger, which I have never done before, I feel bad but still, the words came out.

”NO! DON'T FUCKING TOUCH ME!” I shout right in his face Vinnie’s eyes lock with my own I gulp that was the last straw and I know it. All of a sudden my face is in the passenger seat my chest is against the armrest in the middle Vinnie puts his left leg over my legs so I couldn’t kick him or grind myself against him.

”D-Daddy don't please.” I sniff looking back at him with wide eyes ”I-i I'll be good daddy-” Vinnie lets out a dark laugh he then grabs a first full of my hair and yanks my head back I gasp ”I hope you cry.” Vinnie whispered in my ear before pushing my head back down ”Don’t fucking move or you get five more.” Vinnie lifts my dress so it's around my waist he ripped my underwear off throwing the ruined material on his dashboard. ”count” Vinnie demands ”How many-?” I start to ask ”DID I SAY TO FUCKING SPEAK!” Vinnie lands a hard slap on my ass

”OH FUCK!” I yell trying to get away ”thats 25 now.” Vinnie says as he pulls me back into place ”Now I said count, so fucking count slut!”

I feel the first one on my right cheek ”OW one” I said as I sniff holding my tears in. Another one SLAP! This time on my left I let out a cry as I try not to move an inch. ”TWO!” this time a tear slips out but Vinnie doesn't see it, his hand lands on my right cheek way more hard then the last one and before I could even cry he lands another one with the same power onto the left cheek. A sob escapes my mouth as tears fall down my face ”FUCKING COUNT OR USE THE SAFE WORD!” my heat throbs as he yells at me my arousal running down my legs. ”THREE FOUR!” I scream as a sob comes up my throat it hurts so bad but feels so good.

”T-T-TWENTY-FIVE!” I scream sob, my face soaked with tears and my wetness has been running down my legs, I could feel the puddle on his jeans. My ass is on fire and it's bright red with handprints all over the place, I have my head resting on the seat trying to calm down my breathing and crying. Vinnie silently runs his thumbs from the puddle on his jeans all the way to my slit, collecting all of the wetness from that thigh before sticking the digit in his mouth ”mmhm” he moans before doing the same to the other thigh, once again putting his thumb in his mouth again. I am however still sobbing ”you can cry all you want baby...” he kisses my red ass cheek ”you are just making me so much more hard.” Vinnie says before he licks my clit softly ”mmm daddy” I say with a small voice ”I’m still mad at you baby.” He says as he slaps my clit making me whimper ”please daddy” I try to grab his shirt with my hands.

Vinnie immediately pulls away so I can't touch him or grab him ”No, don't fucking touch me.” he says repeating what I said to him not long ago obviously, it had hurt his feelings and stuck with him. ”oh, daddy I'm sorry I didn't mean it that way.” I look back at Vinnie best I can from my position ”I really am sorry Vinnie, I love you.” I say with wide eyes making sure he is paying attention. He rubs my thigh ”I know you are brat!” he then slaps my thigh ”sit in your seat and buckle up I don't wanna hear a word.” he pulls his belt off and puts it in the back seat. A tear slips down my face, is he really that mad at me that he won't say I love you back, I crawl to my seat and fix my dress before I sit down soft and slow my behind still in major pain.

The pain makes me feel even worse knowing he's very mad at me I stare at my hands I didn't even realize I was still crying till he said something ”turn around baby let me see” Vinnie says softly. I look up at him and I sniff slowly I pull my knees up and stand on them and use the window for support as Vinnie pulls my dress up around my waist once again ”fuck baby I'm sorry” Vinnie says in a sad tone as he begins to leave light kisses on my cheeks ” I love you baby so much I'm just pissed at Bryce and then you were being a bitch about-” My eyes widen ” W-What? I was being a bitch! You dragged me around like a fucking kid!” I say angrily as tears run down my face ”you're a fucking asshole” I say to myself getting ready to sit back down but then I feel pain on the skin of my ass so much worse then before and it didn't feel like a hand.

A giant sob jumps from my throat and moaning I feel my pussy clench around nothing for the hundredth time this night. I whip my head around to see Vinnie holding his belt in his hand with an angry face and black eyes filled with lust and rage mostly rage. ”You never fucking learn, unless I treat you like shit so get in the fucking back! Don't say a goddamn word or I'll whip you with my belt again.” I gasp and I scurry between the seats my ass getting stuck between my seat and Vinnie's shoulder. ”My lucky day huh.” I feel him smack my ass a cry leaving my lips and I fall into the back seat my ass in the air. Another slap is delivered to my ass tears running down my face as I try to buckle up fast even with the pain in my behind, my makeup was definitely fucked up.

20 minutes later we pulled into a nice-looking hotel Vinnie grabs a napkin and hands it to me silently ”don’t say a word unless spoken to and just sit down till I come get you.” I nod as I wipe my eyes trying to stop the tears Vinnie steps out of the car and opens the back door on my side grabbing my hand and pulling me out after I unbuckle. I know this sweetness is going to be short-lived as it's just a front so people don't think something is actually wrong. Vinnie approach soon but first he turns around and asks how late room service is open ”24/7 sir” the lady says as she hands him two room cards.

”Perfect.” Vinnie says as he grabs my hand pulling me to the elevator the second the elevator door shut Vinnie grabs my neck and slammed me against the wall.

A loud moan leaving my lips ”i had to get the most expensive room so they wouldn't kick us out for all the screaming you're going to do from your punishments.” Vinnie licks my lips and cheek ”Open your fucking mouth!” he says immediately my mouth drops and my tongue falls out past my teeth. Vinnie spits in my mouth I moan loudly ”Swallow” so I did ”Again”

he grunts squeezing my neck and one of my boobs, my mouth drops open Vinnie spits but it doesn't all go in my mouth I shoot my eyes open looking down at the spit on the floor disappointed. I start to lean down ”Don’t baby I'll give you more.” I look up at Vinnie and grab his waist, a slap is delivered to my face ”I said don't touch me do you want me to spit in your mouth or not!” I moan dropping to the floor on my knees mouth open ”YES!” I say rushing to taste him again.

”I-I’m sorry daddy I won't do it anymore.” I say with puppy eyes my mouth open waiting for him to give me a gift. Vinnie looks down at me with a disgusted look tears fall from my eyes as I look up at him mouth still open waiting patiently. ”You're a nasty slut!” he slaps me before forcing my mouth open spitting inside. I moan at the taste and at the pain on my face I swallow reluctantly wanting it to last forever I then lick my lips and hold my cheek ”we’re the only people on this floor so strip and crawl to the room. Stay on your knees where you belong, for now at least”

He Pushes me to he ground It didn't hurt because I was only on my knees I take my dress off and my dra I go to kick my heels off

”Don’t! keep them on.” Vinnie says leaning down picking up my clothes as the doors open I see a long hallway and all the way to the end is a double door I crawl out and wait for Vinnie ”Come here, Now.” I crawl as fast as I can ”sit” my eyes widen I'm not a fucking dog I think to myself all the sudden I feel something around my neck.

Vinnie had fastened his belt around my neck like a collar ”Crawl bitch!” I gasp as my hands hit the ground we slowly move towards the door Vinnie behind me. I feel pain on my ass once again I whip my head around to see Vinnie whip my ass with my own bra. I moan I'm gonna have bruises for months, he hits my ass every once in a while I moan every time. We get to the door and he opens it with his key card. ”I have to run to the store you can shower if you wish and watch tv but I expect you naked and ready when I get back” Vinnie starts to walk away ”oh and don't touch your self, I'll know if you did.” he turns to me and looks down into my eyes before walking out.

I hop in the shower and then I lay on the couch with a homemade ice pack I made, with supplies from the room and the mini ice machine in the room, pressed against my sore ass. It's been barely been an hour, but I already miss Vinnie. I can't wait for my punishment to be over so he will hold me and kiss me I don’t wanna fight, I wanna sleep. My head lefts up at the sound of the door being opened. ”Get on the bed it's time for your punishment.” Vinnie says as he comes in with a couple of different black bags I Eye them suspicious of what's inside.

”Don't worry about it and lay on your stomach.” Vinnie says in a slightly angry tone I rush on the bed and lay my head in a pillow I feel Vinnie slightly sit on my lower back making the bed dip. All of the sudden my hand is being tired to the headboard then the other he gets off me before doing the same to my legs. I'm spread like a starfish and I can't turn my head to see anything. ”scream and cry all you want I don’t care.” and with that, he gets off me not a second later I hear him fiddle with the bags and then silence then I hear... Buzzing?

My eyes widen as I realize what my punishment is ”NO DADDY PLEASE I-I IM SORRY NOT THAT PLEASE!” tears immediately pour down my face I pull at my restraints even though it's useless. ”Maybe you will listen first then run your loudmouth Brat.” I feel the head of the vibrator enter me and I moan immediately pleasure runs through me I hear another vibration and then out of nowhere, Vinnie pulls a smaller vibrator out and positioned right at my clit. I moan even louder I can feel my first orgasm approach. I feel a slap on my ass ”n-no more daddy please I will behave and l-listen.”

I sob as he delivers more smacks to my overly sore ass my orgasm ripping through me another already on its way. I hear Vinnie start to look in the bags again he pulls my hair back ”see this” Vinnie shows me a stick or so I think. He pulls on one of the ends and it comes off releasing a bunch of leather strings my eyes widen in fear he's gonna whip me with a real sex whip my second orgasm making me shakes and convulses almost pushing the vibrator out. Vinnie pushes it back in all the way before he starts whipping my ass with the whip my third orgasm approaching fast ”AAAH MAKE IT STOP VINNIE IT’S TOO MUCH TO FAST!” I yell tears running down my face

”what’s that? turn them on high! ok whatever you say.” Vinnie chuckled deeply ”Nooooooo” I moan as the vibrations make my third orgasm be forced out I scream nonsense orgasm after orgasm driving me crazy.

-two hours later-

I was sobbing and screaming as another orgasm ripped me apart it feels so good but it hurts to breathe at this point. ”CORN MUSTARD” I yell the safe word. Immediately the vibration stop and are pulled from my body Vinnie unties my hands and feet ”BABY ARE YOU OK” he softly turns me over on my back and I hiss in pain everything hurts ”NO FUCK YOU!” I yell not meaning a word of it ”oh baby I'm so sorry-” I push him away I'm not even mad at him I'm just in pain and still unsatisfied ashamed I still want his dick and his mouth on mine I feel a Slap ”WHY CAN’T YOU FUCKING LEARN??!? DO I HAVE TO HURT YOU WITH MY COCK AND WORDS TO MAKE YOU FUCKING LISTEN!” he slams his rock hard cock into me I didn't even know he was naked till now ”UGH I HATE YOU.” I yell

Vinnie stops and pulls out of me he slams back in making me moan ”FUCK YOU, THAT'S WHY YOU’RE A SLAVE FOR MY COCK, YOU FUCKING WHORE!” Vinnie yells as he slaps my face. Begin to moan uncontrollably it feels so good I can feel him in my belly his big ass cock ramming into my uterus. ”FUCK DADDY IM SORRY I SHOULD HAVE LISTENED TO YOU I DON’T HATE YOU I LOVE YOU S-SO MUCH DADDY! IM YOUR SLUTTY WHORE PLEASE PUT YOUR CUM IN ME AND FILL ME UP, DADDY” I was shaking around his cock his breath in my face I just wanted to taste him so bad ”p-please kiss me daddy.” Vinnie looks down at me ”WHY THE FUCK SHOULD I KISS YOU BITCH, YOU HAVE DONE NOTHING BUT BE A PAIN IN THE ASS TONIGHT!” I sob I just wanted to feel that he loves me I feel so stupid and useless right now. The sobs no longer from the pleasure but from my broken heart Vinnie slows down looking at my devastated face as real emotional tears and gasps left my body as I just laid there.

”b-baby?” Vinnie asks still pounding into me he stops still inside of me I look up at him and hiccup ”y-you don’t love me anymore because I said a-all those nasty things I d-didn’t mean it a-and you hate me now” I cry into the pillow Vinnie grabs my face wiping all of my tears and kissing me on the lips sweet and passionately taking my breath away.

”mmmmm” I moan into his kiss sliding my tongue in his mouth putting my hand in his hair and hugging his body close to me I was drooling at his taste kissing him harder and grinding against him. I feel Vinnie smile as he begins to fuck me again this time with passion and love not anger and resentment. We both are kissing sloppy and moaning into each others mouths as he pounds into me.

”FUUUUCK I LOVE YOU SO MUCH IM GONNA CUM” He moans as he cums deep inside of me causing me to release ”DADDY YESS THANK YOU IM SORRY.” I lay there as Vinnie pulls out my head snaps up ”Nononono I want it.” I open my mouth for his slightly stiff cum covered cock.

”fuck such a nasty girl...” he moans as he puts his cock down my throat choking me

”mmmmm baby I forgive you, you’re so perfect in every way.” he moans taking his soft cock out of my sucking mouth I start to whine but Vinnie pops his finger in my mouth keeping me busy still I pass out.

Vinnie’s POV

”My sweet girl.... No more alcohol for you but I do love you very much you have never been so bratty.” I kiss her lips and turn off the light's pulling my brat closer as I snuggle into her neck I couldn't ask for more.

#vinnie hacker smut #vinnie hacker #vinnie hacker x reader #vinnie hacker images #smut #skateboarding #bryce hall #jordan huxhold #kio cyr #angry sex

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inthedayswhenlandswerefew · 4 years

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But You Can Never Leave [Chapter 13: Paper And Ink]

A/N: Can I just take a second to say how happy I am to see all of your reactions to my little fic?! I have never been a super popular writer on Tumblr but I like to think that I have some of the cleverest, kindest, most thoughtful readers around. Your support for and emotional investment in my stories makes me so, so, so happy. Please enjoy this latest chapter...it’s the longest one yet! 💜

Also, MAJOR shout out to @writerxinthedark and her constant insanely astute observations!! Girl, I’m shook. Do you have ESP or what...? 👀

Chapter summary: Roger tries to reach a compromise, John tries to offer solace, Chrissie tries out some retro science, Y/N tries to process some alarming new information.

This series is a work of fiction, and is (very) loosely inspired by real people and events. Absolutely no offense is meant to actual Queen or their families.

Song inspiration: Hotel California by The Eagles.

Chapter warnings: Language! Discussion of substance abuse! Babies! Drama! Angst!!!

Chapter list (and all my writing) available HERE

Taglist: @queen-turtle-boiii @loveandbeloved29 @maggieroseevans @imnotvibingveryguccimrstark @im-an-adult-ish @queenlover05 @someforeigntragedy @imtheinvisiblequeen @joemazzmatazz @seven-seas-of-ham-on-rhye @namelesslosers @inthegardensofourminds @deacyblues @youngpastafanmug @sleepretreat @hardyshoe @bramblesforbreakfast @sevenseasofcats @tensecondvacation @queen-crue @jennyggggrrr @madeinheavxn @whatgoeson-itslate @brianssixpence @simonedk @herewegoagainniall @stardust-killer-queen @anotheronewritesthedust1 @pomjompish @writerxinthedark

Please yell at me if I forget to tag you! :)

“You can’t leave,” John pleads. One of his hands—strong, nimble, a gold band on his wedding finger—is clutching the wooden bedpost. Chrissie paces back and forth beside him, gnawing her thumbnail until it bleeds, silent tears streaking down her ruddy cheeks.

You throw your open suitcase onto the bed and start yanking things out of drawers: panties and bras—the practical ones, not the sexy ones, I won’t be needing those in the immediate future—jeans, velvet dresses, sweaters, socks, mittens, scarves. It’ll be cold in Boston. “I’m going home.”

“Love, please...” Chrissie sobs.

“I’m not staying here.” Your voice is surprisingly steady, resolved even. “I’m not going to stay in this house with him. I’m not going to follow him around the world watching him fuck other women and humiliate me in tabloids. I’m done, I’m going home.”

“You have a contract with the record company, you’re the tour nurse!” Chrissie protests. “Jesus christ, they could sue you for non-performance! When does the band leave, a week from now?!”

“Six days,” John says softly.

“Six days!” Chrissie shouts at you.

“I’m not going. They can sue me, that’s fine.” I don’t have any money anyway. None that’s actually mine.

“You can’t leave,” John says again. His greyish eyes are wide and restless, desperate; you didn’t know it was possible for him to be this agitated. He’s not Queen’s unflappable bassist today.

“Yeah? Observe.” You pick the pink conch shell up off the dresser—the one John found for you on the beach in Ostia, during a tour that feels like a lifetime ago—and tuck it gently into a corner of your suitcase where it will be cushioned by knit sweaters. “John, I have a bunch of your sketches downstairs. There’re some on the refrigerator, some framed in the living room, a couple on the dining room walls...will you go get those for me, please? I can’t leave without them.”

John just stares at you, blinking and thunderstruck.

Next to the empty space on the dresser where the conch shell once lived is the Canon F-1. You consider the camera for a moment, then snatch it up and move to hurl it out of the second-story window.

John jolts out of his paralysis. “No no no no, I think you’ll regret that.” He gently pries the Canon out of your grasp and places it back on the dresser.

“What the hell are you going to do in Boston?!” Chrissie wails. “All your friends are here now! Your life is here!”

“I’m going to get a job at the hospital and marry some boring, predictable man and get a house with a white picket fence and fill it with two exceptionally average children”—if I can have them, and that’s a big if as it turns out—“and a golden retriever and live out the rest of my days in blissful, prosaic anonymity. Thanks for asking.”

“Oh come on, you don’t want that!” Chrissie snaps. “You’ve never wanted that, that’s why you came to London with the band to begin with!”

“I don’t want to feel like this!” you scream, and all those tears you didn’t know you were biting back start spilling out in hot, torrential streams. Your breath hitches; your throat burns. Like wildfire. John pulls you to his chest, murmurs that everything will be okay, cradles the back of your head with his palm. You know he’s exchanging a glance with Chrissie over your shoulder. That’s why she brought him here, after all; to help talk you off the ledge, to help convince you to stay.

“What a fucking mess,” Chrissie says in despair.

“It’s my fault,” you choke out.

“It’s not,” John whispers.

“It is,” you insist bitterly, sobbing into him. “Everyone warned me and I ignored it because I’m a complete idiot and now I’ve gone and ruined my life.”

“You don’t have to go!” Chrissie implores. “You can stay here. With us, with me and John and Mary and Freddie and Brian. You have British citizenship, you can get a job at a hospital in London if you really want to leave the band. You can stay with me and Bri for as long as you need to until you’re back on your feet, or with Freddie...they’d give you any amount of money you needed to get started...they’d be heartbroken if you left, love, you’ve been there for them through everything, since Queen was just a bunch of nobodies, since we were all flat broke...they’re never going to forget that loyalty you showed them, that faith. They’d do anything to repay you.”

You sigh shakily as you untangle yourself from John and wipe your eyes. “If I stay here, I’ll spend the rest of my life dodging Roger at birthday parties and holidays and restaurants. And being known as the wife he fucked around on. I’ll be a pitiful mess of a person. They had a photo of me in the News Of The World, did you know that? A tiny little circular photo under a huge, glamorous one of Dominique. ‘Look everyone, check out the dashing rock star’s sad, pathetic, unremarkable, soon-to-be-ex-wife. Surely you can appreciate why he’d shop around.’”

“Yes, I saw that part,” Chrissie says softly. She understands some of what you’re feeling, surely, and yet she must also have a sensation of gratefulness; plenty of musicians wander like tornadoes, touching down and sowing chaos wherever their compulsions take them, but few wives have the misfortune of seeing their names and faces paraded through the tabloids. Suddenly, Chrissie isn’t the most-wronged wife in Queen anymore.

You bury your face in your hands. “Oh god. My parents might even hear about this. They could be buying wine and Cheetos at the grocery store and see my husband and his girlfriend on the cover of a magazine in the checkout line.”

“I’m so sorry,” Chrissie replies, her voice hoarse. John crosses his arms over his chest and says nothing; but he kicks the wooden bedframe hard enough to send a crack down the center of the footboard.

Downstairs, you hear the front door open. Chrissie and John whirl to you, panicked.

“Hey, love of my life!” Roger’s chipper voice vaults up the staircase. Someone hasn’t checked the headlines yet. “Baby? You home?”

“Do you want me to stay?” John asks you.

“No, I can handle it.”

“Are you sure? Because I’ll stay for as long as you want me to. I’ll hide in the goddamn bushes outside the window if that would be helpful.”

“No, John.” You smile and climb onto your toes to wrap your arms around the back of his neck, to hug him goodbye. He’s warm and comfortable and sheltering. He feels more like home than this house ever has, isn’t that strange? And for a second, just one, you wonder what your life would look like if there had been no Veronica, no Roger.

You’d still be in Boston, you idiot, you chastise yourself. You never would have come to London with Queen if it wasn’t for Roger. And You’re My Best Friend wasn’t about you.

“Thank you,” you tell John. “But I have to do this part myself.”

“Okay. Don’t you dare go cart yourself off to Heathrow without telling me first, alright?”

“Sure,” you say, not meaning it. I can’t let him stop me.

“Good luck,” Chrissie frets, wringing her hands, twirling her wedding ring. “Call me, okay? I’m going to be a nervous wreck until I hear from you. I’ll chew my poor fingers to the bone.”

“I’ll call. I promise.”

“Hey baby!” Roger materializes in the bedroom doorway, pushes his prescription sunglasses up into his windswept blond hair, peers around the room at you and John and Chrissie. And you’re suddenly reminded of how a room changes when Roger walks into it, how everything shifts somehow, becomes brighter, more alive, brimming with magnificent potential; how cavernously empty the world would feel without him in it. Chrissie glares at him with her arms crossed, nostrils flaring, tapping one fashionable riding boot against the hardwood floor. “Uhhhh...am I interrupting something?”

“Bye, love.” Chrissie kisses you quickly on each cheek and breezes out of the room. You hear her boots clopping as she descends down the staircase. After a moment, John follows her.

“You despicable prick,” John hisses as he passes Roger in the doorway.

Roger is mystified. “Baby, what’s going on?” His eyes flick to the hastily packed suitcase, to the cracked footboard. “What the fuck happened to the bed?”

There are so many ways to ask the same question. When did you decide that you needed to have her? Who is she to you? How could you do this to me? What did she give you that I couldn’t? Instead, what you ask him this: “Have you seen the News Of The World today?”

His brow furrows into deep grooves. “No...” But something primal flashes in his vivid blue eyes, just briefly. Something like fear. He knows he’s done things that would hurt me. And I don’t think I’ll ever be able to unearth them all.

You grab the magazine off the bed and hurl it at him. Roger picks it up off the floor and flips to the front page. His shoulders slump, one hand comes up to cover his mouth, he exhales in a deep sigh; his whole body shifts the same way a room does when he walks out of it: dims, deflates, goes bloodless. He calmly lays the News Of The World on the dresser, folds his sunglasses and sets them down as well, rubs his eyes with the heels of his calloused hands. Then he turns to you.

He’s going to deny it, you think, revolted. He’s going to deny it just like Brian did, try to patch things up in some weak and gutless way, placate me so he can drift off to sleep at night imagining he’s a good husband.

But Roger isn’t Brian. He never has been.

He asks you quietly, in surrender: “What do you want to know?”

Your stomach plunges into freefall, because this is real. Maybe there was some part of me that was hoping this was a mistake, some naïve and hopeful sliver of idealism left over from childhood, from a time when everything in the world was either good or evil and nothing lived in the treacherous shadows in between. “How long?”

“Does it matter?”

“Yes, Roger, it matters.”

“Not long.” He waves a hand glibly. “She...ah...well she thought I was pretty maddening at first. It took her a while to come around to the idea.”

You flinch like you’ve been slapped. “Jesus christ, Roger. Thank you, that’s great, thank you for that information.”

“I’m not trying to hurt you,” he protests, exasperated. “I’m really not, I don’t...I just don’t...bloody hell, I don’t know how to do this.”

“To do what? To fuck around?! Obviously that’s inaccurate—”

“No, to confess!” he shouts. “I never confess, I never admit it, I just avoid or deflect or deny it, and when that doesn’t work anymore I just walk out because usually I don’t care enough to have the conversation. But now I do so I’m really, really trying to give you what you want. I thought you wanted answers. So ask me whatever you want to and I’ll tell you the truth.”

Everyone lies. Everyone disappoints you. I knew that, I really did...but somehow I let him convince me that I didn’t. That he was built of nothing but light. “Do you love her?”

“No,” he replies instantly. “It’s a fling, that’s all.”

“So you didn’t corner her somewhere and tell her that you’re planning on breaking up with me.”

Roger winces. I wasn’t going to end up like Josephine, that was the first promise I made to myself on British soil. And look where I am now. “No. Never.”

“Why, Roger?”

He looks away, runs his hands through his hair; he genuinely doesn’t know how to answer.

You stare at him in disbelief. “Are you even sorry...?”

He speaks carefully, purposefully. “I’m sorry you had to find out, that you were hurt by it. And I’m really fucking sorry about that headline. Discretion is extremely important to me. I never would have let that happen, but you know...” He shrugs, smirking guiltily in that disarmingly bewitching way that he does. Stop, you warn yourself, feeling something in you grasping for reasons to stay. “I haven’t been thinking especially clearly lately.”

“Yes, between the coke and the drinking and the pills you’re quite the disaster, aren’t you?” Scalding tears slither down your face. “So you’re not sorry you did it. You’re not sorry that you’re an addict or a cheater.”

“It’s not about that. It’s...” He searches for the words like premonitions in tea leaves. “Yes, there are drugs and parties and women. There are a lot of those things. But I’m not addicted to any of them. I’m addicted to being Roger Taylor, drummer of one of the best bands in the world. It’s everything I am, it’s everything I’ve ever wanted to be. I never want to live in a world where that’s not who I am anymore. You understand that, what it’s like to feel caged and miserable, you know what it’s like to want to experience things. And so if it takes coke and pills to get up on that stage every night and drum under those blinding lights until it feels like my arm is split open again, okay, no problem, I’ll do it. If women are a part of the lifestyle, a part of being free, then I’ll take advantage of that. And why the fuck does it matter? Why do so many people think that fidelity is the ultimate manifestation of love? Plenty of faithful people hate each other. Plenty of people who screw around are irretrievably in love with one person, are fucking owned by them. I love you. I want to come home to you. I want to raise my children with you if that’s a possibility, and if it’s not then fine, whatever, I’m gonna love you all the same. You’re still on my list, Boston babe. You’re always going to be on my list. Why isn’t that enough?”

“John doesn’t cheat,” you object helplessly. Even if he has all the reasons in the world to.

“No, he doesn’t. But he’s a very different kind of man. A better one, probably. But you’ve always known who I was. And I never promised you an ordinary life.”

You shake your head, hide your face in your hands, can’t force the words to leave your trembling lips. It’s not enough for me. Maybe I thought it could be, but it’s just not.

Roger says, gently: “I know we said the marriage didn’t mean anything”—yes, that was your condition, wasn’t it?—“but that’s not completely true. It’s not just paper and ink. It does mean something. It means that you’re the person I want to take care of, the person I can rely on to provide for my family and friends if something ever happened to me. It means that I love and trust you in a way that is unconditional. That you’re my best friend.”

“I don’t want to live like this, Roger,” you whisper.

“So what’s next?” he demands. “So you’re going to take that suitcase and run back to the States and...what, get a job at the same hospital you were so desperate to escape from? Back out of the tour? Abandon the band and the friends you have here?”

“If that’s what it takes to get away from you.”

For the first time, you hurt him; you really hurt him. You see it ripple across his face like cold, swirling ocean waves. “Please don’t leave.”

“I’ve already decided, Roger.”

“Come on, baby, please, we can work this out—”

“I’m not interested.” You zip the suitcase closed, heave it off the bed, and drag it towards the door.

“So even if we can’t work it out,” Roger erupts, bolting to the doorway, to stand between you and whatever a life after him looks like. “Don’t leave the band. Leave me, just me, but not the band. I know you don’t want to leave them. I know they’ll be devastated if you disappear, not to mention they might legitimately murder me over it. Bri can be a twat, sure, but he’s convinced you saved his life. You and I might be the only people on the whole fucking planet who can see how brilliant John is, who understand him. Freddie’s convinced you’re some kind of good luck charm, you know how superstitious he is, he’ll start having those meltdowns again where he insists he can’t sing five minutes before a show and that the band is doomed, the tour will be a complete disaster. We need you. And I want you to keep the job you love, the travel, the mansion, the money, I want you to have all of it. You’ve earned it. You shouldn’t lose it because of me.”

And as you clutch the handle of your suitcase, your mind dashing from one logistical step to the next—grab my passport and some cash out of the safe, collect all of John’s sketches, call a cab to take me to Heathrow—you start remembering things. But you don’t see them like flashes, like misty reveries, no; you feel them like heat from a roaring fireplace, like Mediterranean pebbles digging into the wrinkled soles of your feet, like the deafening screams of crowds filling the Rainbow Theater, the Hammersmith Odeon, the Apollo, the Budokan, Madison Square Garden. Memories of excavating shards of glass from John’s hand in a New Orleans mansion crawling with fantasies and nightmares, of toasting pink champagne in the lobby of the Chelsea Register Office, of museums and parks and beaches and apartments filled with threadbare couches and extravagant dreams, of Christmases and New Year’s Eves, of Roger convincing you to come to London with Queen on a June morning in 1974, cradling your face in his rough hands, promising you everything you’ve ever wanted: ‘Love...Accept. The fucking. Offer.’ And you could run to the other side of the world, sure; but you’re never going to be able to carve those memories out of your bones.

You let go of the suitcase, and Roger’s smile lights up his face like the sun.

~~~~~~~~~~

“Careful...careful, love...” Roger contorts himself to keep the umbrella over you and the Boston cream pie you’re carrying as rain pours out of a sinister grey sky. You both hurry beneath the roof that covers the front porch and ring the doorbell. Freddie answers wearing a tight green shirt, jeans, and an enormous toothy grin.

“Oh, for me?” he squeals, eyeing the pie.

You step inside as Roger stays out on the porch to shake off the umbrella and finish his cigarette; Chrissie hates people smoking in her house, and one should get what they want on their birthday. “Obviously, it’s for Chris. But I suspect she’ll share.”

Chrissie appears in a blue dress, her wide-set pale eyes alight as she gazes at the pie. “At last! I finally get to try one of these! And yes, Freddie, I’m only going to have the teeniest tiniest piece, so there will be more than enough to go around.” She embraces you and takes the pie. “Is this homemade?! It is, isn’t it?”

“Happy birthday, Chrissie,” you announce with a tired smile. Queen leaves for the News Of The World Tour in two days. You’re leaving with them, to everyone’s palpable relief; Freddie and Brian have never mentioned the headline to you, but they know about it of course. Everybody knows. It’s an elephant in every room, an ancient beast that quakes the floor when it walks.

“I’m going to miss you like crazy,” Chrissie tells you. “I always do.” But she’s a little thankful, too; because spending months away on tour is undoubtedly preferable to a permanent absence, a visibly missing piece like a chip in a tooth.

“I know. I’ll call.”

Roger steps inside the massive Chelsea home. “Happy birthday, Chris!”

She promptly spins away, ignoring him, and ferries the pie off to the kitchen. Freddie wraps an arm around Roger’s shoulder and steers him into the living room where Mary, John, a perpetually pregnant Veronica, and a host of assorted Mullens and Mays are passing the twins around like footballs and chatting over appetizers and tea and cookies. Biscuits, you correct yourself. And the shrimp cocktail are called prawns.

“What did you say your name was?” a middle-aged, rotund, bearded man asks John disinterestedly. “Josh? James?”

“John, actually. I’m the bassist.”

The man frowns as he gobbles down a shrimp. “Oh, how odd, I’ve never even heard of you.”

“Yeah?” Roger pipes as he sails over and claps the man aggressively on the shoulder. “Well let me introduce you. This is John Richard Deacon and he wrote You’re My Best Friend, you’ve heard of that one, right? He learned the electric piano to compose it. Yes, he doesn’t just play bass, he has all sorts of gifts. He’s massively talented. He builds amps and manages finances and can sketch pictures that look like freaking photographs...”

You wander into the kitchen where Chrissie is slicing herself a miniscule portion of Boston cream pie. “Oh fuck it, it’s my birthday. I’m having a proper piece of pie, thighs be damned.” She goes in for a second attempt. “You want any?”

“No, I’m alright. I haven’t been feeling well.”

Her brows knit together in concern. “Not compulsively consuming your own weight in snacks to avoid socializing with strangers? That’s unlike you.”

Well, since you asked, I was feeling even more piggish than usual until I found out my husband was fucking somebody else, and also that the entire country knows about it. “Yeah, weird.”

Brian enters the kitchen. “Oh, pie!”

“You want a piece?” Chrissie asks cheerfully. So they’ve made up somehow. Like they always do, like they always will.

“Yes, absolutely, but I’ll get it myself, love. You go enjoy yourself. It’s your day.”

She beams up at him and journeys out to the living room. You are in no rush to join her. Watching Roger charm the crowd, allowing him to dazzle you, to lull you back into his orbit like the subsidiary moon of a vast, ringed planet...no, you have no stomach for that at all. You pour yourself a glass of red wine and try to swallow without tasting it.

Brian’s doting demeanor evaporates like he’s taken off a mask. He sighs, mixes himself a Vesper, sips it as he leans against the kitchen counter and studies you warily. “How are things?”

“Paradisiacal.” Each night you sleep in the guest room with the blue-grey walls and the seahorse-patterned blankets. Roger tried to give you the main bedroom, still sleeps in a spare room in case you ever decide you want it; but you like that the blue room is smaller, more humble, that it smells like John’s brand of cigarettes, that there is no gaping emptiness where Roger usually is. Roger doesn’t try to talk to you about Dominique. He is attentive, optimistic, easygoing, affectionate; he lights the fireplace in the living room and brings you hot chocolate, he wears the red hat you once knit him every time he leaves the house. But he left the paperwork showing he’d sold the apartment—the ‘London Love Nest,’ isn’t that what the headline called it?—out on the kitchen table where you would see it. You know he’s waiting for you to forgive him, as if that’s an inevitability. And every once in a while you feel a guttural stab of fear that he might be right. Someone puts Hotel California on the record player out in the living room. “Every time I hear this goddamn song I get acid trip flashbacks. I start thinking of sharks for some reason.”

“It reminds me of...” Brian’s gaze goes murky. “Well, of a girl from New Orleans.”

The one from the hot tub. The one with a peach tattooed on her shoulder blade.

“We have a stop there,” you say. “You know, on the tour. We’ll be there for a few nights.”

“Oh, I haven’t forgotten.”

No, perhaps that’s all he’s been thinking about.

“How are you these days, Bri? Two beautiful children, adoring wife, We Will Rock You becoming a fantastically successful single...your world must seem pretty golden.”

“You’d think so.” He peers out the window where raindrops are clinging to fogged glass and the November skies are illuminated with episodic flashes of lightning like Morse code. At last he says, very softly: “I think I married the wrong person.”

“I think I did too.”

Bri raises his eyebrows and clinks his Vesper against your wine glass. “So we were both right. Fantastic. Cheers.”

You gulp down the rest of your wine, feeling your stomach roil in protest. You pour another glass. Brian drains his Vesper.

“You want me to escort you out there?” Brian asks, gesturing towards the living room. “I’ll happily redirect everyone’s attention towards the twins if you’d like. They’re very convenient conversation starters.”

“No, thanks Bri. You go ahead.”

“Alright. If you insist.” A smile ghosts his lips. “I’m really glad you’re coming with us, love. I’m sure it wasn’t an easy decision. And I’m sure things won’t feel easy for a long time. But Queen wouldn’t be the same without you.”

“Yeah, yeah. Now get out there before I punch you in your fragile liver.”

Brian laughs, sets his glass in the sink, and disappears into the living room. You stall in the kitchen by yourself. You sip wine, browse through the family photos displayed on the refrigerator, listen to the polite chatter of the guests from a distance. Eventually you venture towards the living room before losing your nerve and veering down the hallway towards the back porch. Outside the rain is falling torrentially, the sky rumbling with thunder. John is sitting on a wooden bench under the roof and smoking as he gazes out into the storm.

“Hey,” he says, sliding over to make room for you on the bench.

You sit down beside him and hold out your hand. He stares at you for a moment, puzzled, before passing you his cigarette. You take one long drag and give it back to him. John blinks at you, stunned.

“That’s extremely bad for you,” he teases.

“So is getting hammered and driving into cop cars.”

He clutches his chest. “Ouch. I felt that in my soul.”

You shove him, chuckling. He points down at your boots. You swing your feet up to rest in his lap, and he lays his left hand on them while he smokes with his right.

“Go ahead,” he says. “I know you might not want to talk about it. That’s fine. But if there’s any baggage you’d like to unburden yourself of, I’m listening.”

I’ve got baggage, all right. I’ve got enough to fill a Boeing 747. “Everyone warned me. Everyone told me it was a terrible idea to fall in love with him. Everyone except you, John. Why is that?”

He’s slow and deliberate when he answers. “I never wanted you to be with someone because...you know...because you thought you should be with them. Because they were the ‘smart’ choice or the ‘safe’ choice or whatever. I wanted you to make your own decisions, whatever those were. I wanted you to be with someone...whoever that was...only because you wanted to be. Because you loved them.”

You nod. “That makes sense, I suppose.”

“I told you once that it didn’t mean anything to someone like Roger when he...you know. When he does what he does. I was telling the truth then, and I’m telling the truth now. I don’t think it meant anything to him. And I don’t know if that kills any of the pain I know you’re feeling, but I hope it does. Because you being in pain is the absolute last thing I’ve ever wanted. Are you angry with me for not trying to change your mind?”

“No,” you say immediately, and you mean it. “Not at all.”

“Good. Because they took away my driver’s license for a year and I’m probably going to need a lot of rides from you.”

You laugh, a brash authentic laugh, and John grins over at you.

Chrissie hauls the sliding glass door open and steps out onto the porch with a frustrated huff. “I know this party is technically for me, but when you’re the mother of infant twins sometimes all you really want is a smoke, a nap, and a bottle of vodka.” She lights a cigarette and plops down into a chair facing the bench.

“How are you, Chris?” What you mean is: Have you screamed much at your husband lately?

“I’m doing pretty well today, actually.”

“Is that because you’re genuinely happy or because you’ve trained yourself not to be sad?”

Chrissie smirks. “You’ll find those feel like the same thing after a while.”

“No, I won’t find out. Because I’m not staying with him.”

“Love...” Chrissie begins.

“I’ll stay in London. I’ll even stay with the band. But I’m not going to stay married to him.”

“Y/N, please, maybe you should think about this,” Chrissie presses. “I know you love him. And I know he makes you wonderfully happy when times are good. Maybe that’s all we can ask for, you know? Wives in our predicament. Maybe we can learn to cherish them when they’re with us, bottle up the magic, store it on a shelf to tide us over until they come back home. No one else is going to light you up the way he does. There’s only one Roger Taylor. Withdrawal from that is going to be hell.”

You glower out into the wind and rain and say nothing.

“And that woman, Dominique Beyrand? I’ve asked around about her, she’s got some husband back in France that she goes home to when she’s not working here. It’s just a fling for her too, it’s nothing serious. I don’t think there was any chance he would have ever considered actually leaving you for her.”

“He bought her an apartment, Chris.”

“Men do stupid things that don’t mean anything all the time. Isn’t that right, John?”

“Sure,” he offers ungenerously.

You stop yourself before the words tumble recklessly from your lips: Maybe you’re trying to convince yourself more than me, Chrissie. “I’m divorcing him,” you vow quietly.

“Okay,” Chrissie capitulates. “Okay. I’m sorry, love, please forgive me. I only got two hours of sleep, Teddy was crying all night.” She puffs on her cigarette and sighs mournfully. “I hate to say it, and I don’t mean to be insensitive, but I guess it was sort of lucky you never got pregnant. Can you imagine trying to split up when you have children together? Working out custody and finances and holidays, having to pretend like you don’t want to disembowel each other all the bloody time...it would be torture.”

John glares at her, his left hand still on your boots.

“Yeah,” you respond; but now you’re distracted, because you remember the reason why you had been so determined to ignore the phone when Chrissie called to warn you about the News Of The World headline. Because the kitchen phone was right next to the calendar, and the calendar would report in no uncertain terms that your period was due.

When was that? A week ago?

You can’t be late. You’ve never been late.

“Oh god,” you breathe.

“What?” John asks, concerned.

In reply, you lurch off the bench, stumble to the edge of the porch, and vomit red wine into the wet grass like a gush of blood. Chrissie soars to you and rubs your back as you retch into her lawn. “Oh no, you poor thing!”

“John, go away,” you choke out as he approaches. “I’m humiliated, I don’t want you to see me like this.”

“You saw me in a jail cell. I’m staying.”

You turn to look up at them. They read the raw horror and shock in your eyes. John’s jaw falls open and he shakes his head, firmly in denial. You could relate.

Chrissie gasps. “Oh, bloody hell.”

“No fucking way,” you wheeze. “After all this time, after all those months of nothing...”

“You better take a test,” Chrissie says. “Come on, I have a kit upstairs.”

She pulls you to your feet and leads you to her bathroom, deftly avoiding the increasingly intoxicated crowd downstairs. John waits just outside the door as Chrissie rummages around in the closet for the test kit. It’s a contraption that looks like a chemistry set, with a dropper and a test tube and a stand with a mirror. You piss into a paper cup—successfully although not with flying colors—and wash your trembling hands in the sink with a piece of pink soap shaped like a seashell. Then you lay on the cold linoleum floor with a folded towel for a pillow and a bucket within reach. Chrissie trickles a few droplets of urine into the test tube, mixes in the contents of a small plastic vial, and places the test tube in the holder that suspends it above the mirror.

Chrissie explains to John: “If she’s pregnant, the chemicals will form a brown ring in the tube. If there’s no ring, we’re in the clear.”

“How fitting,” you chuckle from the floor, dazedly, cynically. “That would be the only ring I’ve ever gotten.”

It takes two hours. The three of you loiter in the bathroom, Chrissie and John perched on the rim of the enormous garden tub, fidgeting and chitchatting anxiously. They alternate popping downstairs, mingling just long enough to not arouse suspicions, bringing back biscuits and bits of toast that they futility try to coerce you into eating. Chrissie doesn’t like the smell of cigarettes in the house, she never has; but now both she and John are chain smoking as they wait and periodically get up to check the test tube.

“This isn’t real,” you whimper. “This can’t be real, right? There’s no way the universe has this ironic a sense of humor.”

“Wait, something’s happening.” John waves Chrissie over to the test kit. She examines it.

“Love...” Chrissie begins, her voice tentative, her eyes glossy.

“No,” you insist. “No way, no fucking way, I don’t believe this...”

Chrissie turns the kit so you can view it, so you can see what she does reflected in the tiny mirror: a single dark ring that informs you you’re carrying Roger’s child.

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kaunis-sielu · 4 years

Text

What’s Next: 5

A/n: This fic requires YOUR help. At the end of each chapter there will be a bolded question where you, the reader, get to pick what happens next. In order for this fic to be a success you need to help me out.

Send AN ASK by Friday 9/25 to have your vote counted.

You pull your phone out of your bra and try to call 9-1-1. When you get the tone that tells you your call can’t go through you swear softly then go to your messages. One of the boys it is Steve is right at the top,

Steve, someone broke into the shop. I’m trapped in the walk in. Please help.

If he doesn’t respond in the next three minutes you’ll try Bucky.

Call 911. On my way.

I tried. Phone call won’t go through.

Armed?

I don’t know.

I’m coming in hot. Anyone allowed to be in the building?

No.

Stay calm. I’m two blocks out.

It’s the longest two blocks of your life. Well, two blocks and a clearing of the shop. When you hear the fridge lock scrape your heart jumps into your throat and you make yourself as small as you can. You’re terrified that it might not be Steve, what if it’s someone else? What if it’s the intruders?

“Doll?” Steve’s voice is soft in the small space.

“Steve,” You say his name just as quietly, “I don’t think I can stand.” You tell him honestly and you see him tuck his gun into his shoulder holster before he moves the cooling rack out of the way.

“The place is empty, I’ve got you.” He says holding out his hand for yours. You take it and he pulls you to your feet, but the adrenaline has left you and instead of being able to stand your legs give out. Steve’s quick to catch you pulling your body flush against his. “Like I said, I’ve got you.”

“Sorry, I didn’t know who else to call.” You tell him, “or well, text.”

“I can see why you couldn’t call from in here.” He says as a chill runs through your body, “can you walk?”

“I think so,” you tell him but he keeps an arm wrapped around you just in case.

“I’d like to get you somewhere safe before we call. Is that okay?”

“What if they come back?”

“That’s why I want to get you somewhere safe. I’m more concerned about protecting you than I am your shop.”

“Okay.” He ushers you into his car with gentle guidance, his calm demeanor is a balm to your frazzled nerves. Once you’re in the car, one Steve has driven himself, he pulls away from your shop and around the block. You can still see Drink, Love, Coffee but it’s at a distance.

“Why don’t you call the police and we’ll wait here for them to send an officer. It could be a minute because it’s not in progress and you’re safe.” You nod and call 9-1-1 then tell the dispatcher what had happened. They promise to send out some officers and soon as they can but, like Steve had warned you, it was no longer considered an active emergency.

You sit in his car and talk, mostly idle chatter which you think is because Steve is trying to distract you. He does ask you to run through what happened at least once so that he can record it for the police. Your voice shakes but you do not break.

Officer Rhodes shows up almost twenty minutes later. He seems to know Steve because they shake hands when Steve climbs out of the car to greet Officer Rhodes. He introduces you and then you relay your story again. It’s not until Steve sends Officer Rhodes your story that you pull your own phone out to text Pepper that you’re going to need a girl’s night next weekend. You need to relax, and you need to fill her in on both Steve and Bucky. You know that Bucky is into you and he’s handsome as hell, Steve you’re a little less sure about. He hasn’t left your side since he’d found you in the walk in but you’re not sure that’s just the job.

Your phone buzzes and you assume it’s Pepper texting you back but when you look down you see that it’s actually Bucky.

Hey Sugar. Saw the front of your shop. You okay?

I’m okay. They stole the register and some baked goods but that’s kind of it.

I’ve got some plywood if you need it. And maybe we could do dinner after?

I might take you up on that. Thanks Bucky.

He sends you back a winking face and you can’t help but roll your eyes at him, even if you are smiling.

You survey the shop again, thankfully they didn’t take any of your cooking supplies, your computer was gone but you’d given Officer Rhodes the address for where your account said that it was located so you didn’t think it’d take too long to get back. Or you hoped it wouldn’t. The register wasn’t too full since today had been a half day but the loss of revenue was still a bummer. You just have to keep reminding yourself that it could’ve been so much worse.

“Hey, is there anything else I can do?” Steve asks softly as you stare at your broken front window.

“No, I’m just a little sad. I just got that window done with the logo on it. Why did they have to smash it? They could’ve just smashed the door.”

“I doubt it was a conscious decision. I’m sorry we didn’t get the system in before this happened.”

“I don’t blame you.” You tell him giving his arm a gentle squeeze, “you were there when I needed someone. I owe you.”

“How about dinner?”

“What?”

“Let me take you to dinner.”

“I owe you remember?” You tell him with a laugh.

“You can buy the drinks.” He says shoving his hands into his pockets and you shoot him an annoyed look. Steve laughs at the look and you break giving him a smile of your own. But now you’re stuck, you could have Bucky come over and help you take care of your shop or you could go out to dinner with Steve and call someone to get the shop closed up and clean tomorrow.

So, what do you do?

Go with Steve tonight or call Bucky?

Tag list:

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#imagine bucky barnes #avengers #steve rogers #captain america #bucky barnes #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers imagine #imagine steve rogers #imagine captain america #imagine avengers #bucky Barnes x reader #Bucky Barnes imagine #Bucky Barnes imagine au #steve rogers imagine au #what’s next story #you choose

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tata0017 · 3 years

Text

A cold morning and a hot coffee, a good mix

Hi! This is my very first fic. I would appreciate if you gave me tips on how to do this because I rlly have no idea. Besides, my first language is not english so sorry in advance if you find grammar or spelling mistakes. I hope you enjoy it :3

Bucky x f!reader

Summary: You live in Bucharest and are trying to be low. While doing this, you meet this wonderful guy who is really introverted but somehow managed to become very special for you.

Warnings: Mentions of blood and violence, mentions of food, loneliness, fluff.

-------------------

It was cold.

"Another cold day" you thought for yourself. However, even if you wanted to, you just couldn´t lay in bed curled up within the blankets. You had to go to work.

Quickly you stood up and headed to the bathroom, muttering. You took your normal shower and got dressed. You loved your work, but the fact that you had to get dressed (as your boss one told you after finding you in sweatpants and a hoodie), really got on your nerves. However, this battle wasn´t finished. You were NOT going to wear heels or a skirt. That was not gonna happen, specially given how cold it was outside.

A pair of black jeans, your good old boots, a white turtle neck and a big black jean jacket with fur inside did the trick.

6:40

"Damn it". You ran to the coffe shop.

- Same as always? - The waiter smiled to you while already putting you name on the cup.

- Yeah... and..

- And make it quick. You should really start waking up earlier y'know-he interrupted you. This had become a habit but waking up earlier was also a NO NO.

Fortunately for you, it was indeed quickly. 6:45 and you were running through the streets of Bucharest with a hot coffe in one hand and your back pack in the other one. You were almost there, only one turn left. But just when you were turning and could see the library just in the middle of the block, you felt how the air escaped your lungs as you hit the floor.

That took you by surprise and when you realized you had collided into someone, another thing hit you and that was the burning hot coffee on your chest.

You hissed and quickly walk to the library, bended and holding the wet and hot cloth from touching your burned skin.

-That coffee was really damn hot- you said while opening the door.

Not a soul was in there because that day, your coworker was doing stuff and well, you didn't ask because she was really nice and never made questions either.

-Err... Le.. Let me help you- a low voice snapped you back while you put the empty coffee in the trash and your back pack on the counter. You just realized that what you had jumped into was in fact a man (a really big and strong one to be precise). You weren´t processing what was happening until a cold breeze reminded you the burn on your chest.

-I... I need to get this off- You said, still trying to figure out who he was or why he followed you or why he entered to the library with you. You went to the bathroom and he walked behind you, trying to keep his distance so that you wouldn´t freak out. You took off your jacket and handed over to him and while doing so, for an instant, you saw the redness on his cheeks and realized he was in fact sorry but he didn't know how to help.

-Could you bring me the first aid kit? Its on that wall- you signaled the wall and he ran to get it to you.

-Well, to be fair, it could be worse- after taking you turtle neck out, your chest was shown. The sports bra you were using was not wet, so it really didn't protect your skin from the hot drink you managed to pour over you. It was really red and it hurted a lot. Besides, it was sticky because of the coffee.

-You need to get it clean. It doesnt seem bad but you could get an infection given the fresh cuts you have- the misterious man talked while opening the first aid kit, seriousness behind his voice. It seemed as if he knew what he was doing, and because of your knowledge, you knew he did.

-Sit- he demanded and you did as told. Two seconds ago he seemed as a lost puppy and now he was giving you orders. He started cleaning with the wet pads, with a concentrated face. You could smell his long hair and as he breathed, a small hint of mint got to your nose.

-Auch-

-Sorry, those fresh cuts are going to hurt a little bit. But I need you to stay still-

Ah, yes. The cuts. Well, you actually kind of didn't have a choice. Last night you were walking to your apartment and some guys tried to rob you. Little did they know you had abilities and you were not an easy target. However, strength was also found in numbers and you stood there, in an alley, againts 6 armed men. They didn't rob you, but you didn't got out unharmed. Some cuts in your chest, a rather deep wound on your arm and some body pain was the price you had to pay to keep your belongings with you. You were used to that. But you had been trying to stay low for some time now, but it seemmed you would always get in fights. You sighted.

-What's with that? you okay?- he asked you, eyes moving from the redness in your chest to your eyes, filled with curiosity.

-Yeah, its nothing- you stared at him a little too long, looking at his eyes. Blue, ocean eyes. Beautiful eyes. But eyes filled with pain. Just like yours.

His cheeks started to go pink and he quickly took up on finishing his first aid job. -Finished- He stood up and was leaving the bathroom until you realized.

- I... I actually have.. emm... nothing to wear y'know- He looked at you surprised, as if he had just realized you were sitting in front of him with nothing but some pants and a bra. He looked another way, flustered and with a small hint of regret.

-Wait for me- He left for a moment and you could hear cloth. Then a gloved hand was in front of you, with a reddish long sleeve shirt -Use it-

You put it on, feeling how warm it was. It felt big, way to big for you, but it was somehow, just perfect. You blushed a little and turned to put back the first aid kit things where they belonged so that he didn´t see your cheeks.

When the blush was gone you faced him -Thanks - you simply said offering a small smile.

- Its okay, It was my fault afterall- he chuckled and looked away

-No! it wasn´t. I was running through Bucharest and wasn't paying attention.. I.. Im sor...- every time you were nervous, you started talking way too much

-Don't, its really okay- He looked back at you with a soft smile.

-At least let me say sorry, you probably are now late to something because of me-

-I... No one is wating for me- he muttered, almost like a whisper, sadness in his eyes.

The words hit you like cold metal, and you felt instant regret.

-I.. I would like to wait for you, y'know. Maybe a coffee wouldn't be bad... Just if you like, if you don't its really ok. Im just-

-Yeah, that would be nice- He smiled again, like a little kid. But he was looking to the floor - Afterall I think I owe you a drink, I have to wash your shirt that is full of coffee and, you need to give me back mine-

-Well that is true- You looked at him and smiled, and he smiled back. A soft giggle left your mouth.

-What are you laughing at- suspicion in his eyes.

-Its nothing... I just... Its weird we got to know each other under this - you signaled your whole body - circumstances-

-Saturday 10 am is okay?- he smiled to you once again.

-Yes, Saturday 10 am

You gave him your phone so he could add himself to your contacts.

-Bucky Barnes, do we have a first name or are we incognito?- you inquired, ligting one brow and giving him a sided grin.

-James, James Bucky Barnes- He looked at you and offered his hand.

-Y/N Y/L/N. Nice to meet you James- You shook his hand

-Nice to meet you Y/N-

#bucky fluff #bucky x y/n #mcu fanfiction #marvel mcu #bucky imagine #bucky x female reader #fanfic #marvel fanfiction #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes

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wolferals · 4 years

Text

🌟LOCKDOWN**🌟

arón piper preference

*sexual content, mentions of sex*

-you had been in lockdown for about 3 months and you became more and more bored being alone at your place

-you tried painting, watching tv and all that but you just felt lonely after all

-after it got a little less strict you hung out with Arón, Miguel and Omar all the time

-at some point Omar suggested you to move in with them because he saw how sad you always looked when you had to go home

-the first week you spent sleeping on the couch in the living room but eventually you and arón got closer over time

-Omar had his boyfriend over quite often as well and they also fought a lot in front of you guys

-so at some point aron and you went to go grocery shopping and then took a walk in the park

-thats when he had first kissed you

-but you both decided not to tell anyone because you were scared of them kicking you out again

-not that you actually think they‘d do that because you were kind of dating arón but if they knew, they‘d be teasing you all the time or be maybe annoyed by you two

-so thats how that went

-you and aron acted like friends around them but secretly you had been sneaking into his room at night to sleep with him instead of the uncomfortable couch

-you‘ve tried your best to keep it a secret even though its hard when aron walks around in his grey sweats all the time

-he sometimes sends you dirty texts when you‘re all sitting on the couch watching a movie

-damn it it was hard not to get wet by his texts

-„i can see how hard your nipples are through your top bebesita.“

-„you look so hot right now.“

-„i wanna fuck you so bad, cant wait for them to leave tomorrow.“

-„im getting hard baby“

-he kept teasing you all the time until one time you snapped when aron told them he was going to bed

-you excused yourself and said you‘d take a shower to catch aron in the hallway

-„come here.“ you had said and pulled him into the bathroom

-you had turned on the water in the shower and then given him a blowjob against the sink

-you know how much he loved you mouth

-and it had surely been hard for him not to moan loudly

-and when no one was watching he gave you quick kisses either on your cheek, forehead or lips

-besides all that, you never dared to have sex at night when omar and miguel were sleeping

-it was too risky

-you only did it when they went grocery shopping or taking a walk with miguels dog who was with his girlfriend mostly

-its crazy how the others havent found out after almost 3 weeks

-one night you snuck back into aróns room where he had already been waiting for you

-„hey.“ he whispered and opened his arms for you to cuddle him

-„omar is still up, i dont know if its such a good thing so sneak around anymore.“ you spoke quietly, slightly concerned

-„i know its shit but yesterday you said yourself that you got no „time“ for a boyfriend. A little controversial dont you think?“ he grinned

-„i mean yeah but cmon, its shit to lie to them.“

-he pulled you closer and then placed his hand on your butt

-that usually was his way to tell you he wanted sex

-but obviously everyone was home

-„aron no, theyre right next door“

-he grinned and spoke:“then i guess you gotta be quiet.“

-before you could complain he hovered over you and pressed your arms against his mattress

-you moaned in complaint but he shushed you and removed your oversized shirt, leaving you only in panties and an almost matching bralette

-„you‘re so damn beautiful do you know that?“ he whispered before placing a wet kiss on your lower stomach

-„aron please dont. They could come in any second.“

-he laughed a little and pulled down your panties

-„thats the point.“

-he started kissing your inner thighs and then left a wet trace up to your stomach

-„you gotta be quiet alright baby?“ he softly rubbed your right thigh before burying his head inbetween your legs

-it was so hard not to moan when his tongue circled around your clit

-meanwhile he was holding both your legs in place that you wouldnt move around

-you ended up biting into a pillow not to let anyone know what he was doing to you in this very moment

-your head kept moving from side to side while aron made it his job to pleasure your clit as much as he possibly could

-suddenly he stopped and came up just to push your bra up to your collarbones and took your left nipple in his mouth

-he started doing the same as he did to your clit

-he circled his tongue around and sucked on your nipple

-occasionally he lightly bit into it making you widen your eyes each times

-he then did the same to your other nipple before bringing his hand to his mouth to wetten it a bit

-eventually he ended up rubbing circles on your clit while licking your nipples and kissing you passionately

-you grabbed the back of his head and dug your nails into his skin

-that was your way of telling him how close you were

-he nodded to show you he understood and he stopped moving his fingers on your clit

-aron then went down on you again and finished his job with his mouth again

-he licked your clit carefully first but then got faster, looking up at you throughout the time he built up to your orgasm

-you placed your hand on his cheek which only encouraged him to go faster

-that eye contact while his tongue was pleasuring you killed you and you came

-he licked you one last time before coming up to you again and kissed you on the lips

-„you actually managed to stay quiet.“ he joked and put his arm around you again while you tried to catch your breath

-you then figured what he just said and replied „it was tough trust me. You‘re fucking good at that“ totally out of breath

-the light peeked through the closed blinds the next morning

-you could hear muffled noises but just figured that aron was up already and had turned on the radio

-so you cuddled up closer to his chest and tried to fall asleep again

-but the noises kept coming closer and closer to your mind and you ended up opening your eyes

-„jesus!“ you spoke while the shock ran through your entire body

-your yelling woke aron and he opened his eyes as well

-omar and miguel were standing in front of your bed, omar had his arms crossed

-miguel was grinning at your half naked bodies tangled together

-aron looked at them for a second before throwing his head back and whispering the word „joder“

-„soo, you guys owe us an explanation.“

#preference #aronpiper #omander #aronxreader #ander #cute #elite #preferences #smut

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leelee10898 · 5 years

Text

Mittens

Here is my submission for the choices 12 days of fictmas!! Hosted by ME lol. I initially had something else prepared, however this kind of popped in my head and wouldn't go away. I picked the song Mittens by Carly Rae Jensen. This isn't a popular song at all, most people probably have never heard of it... but I love it.

Im going to apologize now, read more is not working for mobile for me.. and my laptop is mia.. i have tagged the post long post.

Ellie sloshed through the wet snow covered sidewalk, the air crisp and bitter. She pulled her scarf tighter around her face, trying to keep the sting of the wind at bay. It was only a two block walk home from the diner she worked at night, but the frigid temperatures were a bitch. She stuffed her hands back in her coat, trying to keep her hands from freezing solid.

She rounded the corner, her building in sight. Finally she let out a sigh of relief. It was Christmas eve, and the diner had been busy all day. As she climbed the stairs to her 3rd floor loft she could hear the sounds of Christmas music blaring from the down stairs neighbors, followed by the loud laughter that filled the halls. It would be a long night, that she was sure of.

Ellie loved Christmas time, usually. It was her mother's favorite holiday, her most cherished memories Were those of her parents Decorating the tree, Laughing and singing Christmas Carols, while drinking hot chocolate and spending time together…. just the three of them. This year however was different for her all together, she was alone, completely and totally alone.

It had been five months since she last seen Colt. Five months since she had been home, And 3 months since the falling out with her dad. Riya and Darius were still together, and at the same school about 2 hours away from Langston. She loved when they would visit, but she would be lying if their constant PDA made her heart twinge. She missed Colt so much. The last thing he told her was he knew she would be great, If he could only see her now.

She turned the key, pushing her shoulder into it with a gentle nudge to open, flicked the lights on and tossed the keys on to the table next to the door. She had been in her dorm for two months before something had to give, she hated her roommate. The last straw was when she locked her out the entire night while she had some random guy in the room, who stole her pillows and blankets along with her bras. What kind of weirdo does that?

After a long hot shower, She changed into a t-shirt and a pair of fuzzy Christmas pjs pants. She tied her hair back and began to string lights on the little tree she picked up on the roadside stand by the diner. The loud echoing of the party going on below her becoming overwhelming, something to drown out the noise .

"Alexa. Play my christmas playlist."

Home tonight

Rest my headIn my single childhood bed

Close my eyes

Count to three

Wish that you were here with me

She hummed along with the tune playing as she adorned the tree with the miscellaneous Ornaments she picked up at the thrift shop in town. She still attended classes, just enough to keep her scholarship in tact. Because there were no other dorms available, the school helped with some housing costs. she found a small loft outside of campus, Saving her tips and using her savings she was able to furnish and decorate her little space. It wasn't much but it was hers, and she was proud of it.

Still, the nights were lonely. She often thought about Colt, where he was, what he was doing. Did he think of her at all?

Last year when my hands were cold

You were always there to hold

So give me your warmest pair

Your strongest pair of mittens

Please

Something to get me through

The loneliness of Christmas eve

Ifell for you, like crazy

And I can't get thoughts of you, from me

The speaker blasted the music, she liked this song. Her fingers grazed a little glass star in the box. It made her think of her dad, god she missed him so much. They had made some progress in recent weeks, but he took an assignment that required him to travel, he would have to miss Christmas.

So give me your warmest pair

Your strongest pair of mittens

Please

She stood back giving the tree a look over, absentmindedly resting her hand on her stomach, the other on her hip. A smile played on her lips its really coming together. But the smile quickly faded as she spotted the couple walking from the building, holding hands the woman cuddling into her boyfriend's side.

By my table I survive

Fix the makeup from my eyes

Fake a smile so they will see

Wish that you were here with me

Last year when my hands were cold

You were always there to hold

So give me your warmest pair

Your strongest pair of mittens

Please

She missed that…

***********

Colt climbed off his bike, a shiver rippling through him. He liked the warm, not the cold. He had been a rolling stone the past five months, going wherever his two wheel took him. He tried to keep his mind busy, planning job after job. The pay out was great, but something was missing. How could he become the king of L.A without his Queen? The problem was his Queen was far away being great. The more time away from her, the more he realized he didn't need to be king of LA, he could be whatever she needed him to be.

Looking up at the brick building a car drove past splashing a dirty, wet, cold mixture of slush all over him. Great! Fuck you asshole! He shouted as he shook his hands. Definitely not how he wanted his night to go. It was Christmas Eve, his father was gone, his mother vacationing on some tropical island with her new husband. He was alone, completely alone. He let out a frustrated sigh as he made his way towards the building. He was nervous about this task, but the pay out was worth it.

****************

Ellie sat on the couch, wrapped in a fuzzy blanket. The tv was on, but she wasn't paying it any mind.

Shine your name

Through the snow storm, baby

You can break me

To the bone, ohI was wrong

You were wrong to make me

Feel like I was all alone,

She dabbed her eyes, the song hitting a little close to home. Damn him for leaving her all alone, with no way to get in touch with him. He left her alone, when she needed him the most.

Walking through my old home town

No one else but me around

Make an angel in the snow

Pray that I can let you go

*******

Colt stood in front of the door, he never felt nervous before a job, but this time the stakes were high and if he were being totally honest, this wasn't exactly a job. He mustered up every ounce of courage he could as he lifted his hand to the door and gave it a quick rapp. His heart in his throat, he could hear the blood pounding in his ears. This was it, no turning back now.

********

The party had started to die down, the commotion seeming to spill into the halls. She heard a knock at the door. God not another drunk idiot at the wrong apartment again. She grunted, rising from the couch and walking across the room. Slowly opening the door.

fell for you, like crazy

And I can't get thoughts of you, from me

So give me your warmest pair

Your strongest pair

Your warmest pair

Ellie stood there stunned. She expected a drunk idiot, what she got was completely different. She blinked repeatedly, a pair of deep brown eyes staring back at her.

"Hi El." He nervously rubbed the back of his neck.

"C, colt? Wha. What are you, how did you find. What are you doing here?" She stammered.

"I um, I needed to see you. Can I. Maybe come in?"

Ellie nodded, stepping aside and letting him in. Closing the door behind her.

"Ellie I. I.missed you. I'm sorry, I Was an idiot. I shouldn't have let you go. I love you. "

"I'm pregnant."

"You're.. Excuse me?" He stood there gobsmacked.

"Five months. I don't expect anything from you. I can do this.."

"Ellie.."

"On my own. I can raise him alone. I just didn't know how to."

"Ellie!"

"Reach you. I just-"

She was cut off by his lips meeting hers. His hands dropping from her cheeks, resting on her hips. She threw her arms around his neck, melting into the kiss. She had felt so alone, so sad, so lost, but not anymore. He was here, he was real and her Christmas wish came true.

"Ellie, I know I haven't been around. I'm an asshole who thought you were better off. But I Was wrong, I missed you so so much. I promise to be there for you." He dropped his hands to her stomach, her small bump sticking out. "and our baby. I promise to take care of you both, to love you both more than I ever thought capable. And I promise to.never leave you again."

Ellie met his misty eyed gaze, tears began to fall freely. "Forever?"

"Forever, you are my forever Ellie." He smirked as she jumped into his arms, nearly knocking him over. He was there, and he was finally home and neither would be alone again.

See, I fell for you like crazy

And and I can't get thoughts of you, from me

So give me your warmest pair

Your strongest pair of mittens

Please

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#choices 12 days of fictmas #12 days of ficmas #colt x ellie #long post

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im-just-having-fun-karen · 4 years

Text

✨Febuary Dances

Heya everybody! This is a Aoyama x reader! Basically UA has a dance and you and Aoyaoma bith want to wear dresses so you decide that both should! No one said you both couldnt wear dresses together! Also i dont his backstory so im making it up so please dont be mad or offended.- Author-san

Aoyama x reader

Gender neutral reader and nonbinary Yuuga Aoyama

Quirk: light dance, you can manipulate the light when you dance such as making it shine in certain places or making it burn someone, this can also cause you to glow when flustered or excited

Warnings: mentions of high heels and dancing

Begin!

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Y/N PoV

"-there will also be a Febuary dance to celebrate all of your successes as coming this far in your training. It will be on Febuary 13th an begins at 7:30. I hope to see you all there" the class 1B teacher said. Febuary dance? Huh, sounds fun i guess... I began to think of who to take with me when the bell rang and everyone got up to leave and head to lunch. "Bonjour Y/N! Would you like to sit with me?" Aoyama asked as i stopped walking to let them catch up. "Huh? Sure!" i smiled with closed eyes before continuing to walk with Aoyama.

"So, you hear about the Febuary dance Y/N?" i looked up at Jiro with confusion for a moment, "huh? Oh! Haha yeah, not sure who im gonna bring though.." i said as glaced over at Aoyama who was currently talking with Midoriya at the other end of the table. "Really? Well I heard Kirishima was going with Bakugou so thats new!" Kirishima and Bakugo? "Really? Good for them! Im glad they finally decided to come out about their relationship!" i genuinely am happy they came out and that they're going together, i wish i had that confidence with Aoyama. I still remember when we were little and how they were so much less confident back then.

3rd person PoV

Two small kids one with short blond hair and the other with (your hair length and color), both just sitting on the young blonds bed talking. "Its flashy but its useless if i cant use it for more then a second" the young Yuuga said as their eyes began to fill with tears. "Then you'll just have to train more! That way eventually you'll be able to use it as long as you want!" a young Y/N spoke with such determination that it almost convinced the young Yuuga, "b-but I'll never be as strong as you! I'll never be a good hero!" young Yuuga shouted crying at this point, But of course our determined little Y/N wasnt having it. "Of course not with that attitude!" young Y/N spoke with determination as they stood above their best friend, "You cant give up without even trying! Would almight give up!? No! So why should you! We'll train together and both become great heros! No matter what happens we'll always stay together! I'll make sure you become a good hero!" the young Y/N spoke with so much power that Yuuga swore that day to be as confident as them..

Y/N PoV

"Y/N??? Yyyyyy/nnnn! (your full name)!" "eep!" i squeaked as i was suddenly supried out of my spaced out state. "What! What happened!?" i said as i looked around frantically. "Haha! Calm down! Nothings wrong you just spaced out is all" Jiro said as i calmed down and sighed. "So who are you gonna bring to the febuary dance?" "dude i already said i dont know yet." i said with a dead panned look sighing, "well how would you like to go dress-" "or tuxedo!" "yes, or tuxedo shopping with us?" Momo asked as Hagakure interrupted. "Sure, sounds fun."

(time skip because i still cant write you walking to places)

"So wich one do think looks better?" Mina asked me as she showed me two similiar pink dresses. "Hmm, the second one i guess"

I said as she smiled and went to go put the other back.

"Dont forget to get something yourself Y/N!"

I nodded and began to look around for a bit before finding one i really liked. It was long and a bit flowy, it was a beautiful golden yellow with yellow tinted clear fabric covering the legs and beautiful swirly accents, it was a bit open on the sides but it had orange accessories on the belly, legs and upper arms. It had an light orange bra like top with a yellow lace cover and soft yellow clear fabric. The sides, back, and middle front of the dress were a silky soft fabric with a yellow orange gradient. It had a golden orange neck peice like the ones female Egyptians used to wear along with one gold triangle earing on one of the ears.

"..woah.."

I said as i reached to touch it, the fabric was so soft.

"Find one you like y- woah! Thats stunning!"

Mina said as she was awwed by the dress

"I can get it for you Y/N"

Momo said as she walked over to us and smiled

"H-huh!? But its so exspenisive! I-"

She cut me off,

"Its fine Y/N! Really! I dont mind"

I stuttered an ok and she pat my head

"You should try it on Y/N! I wanna see how good you look in it!"

Mina said as she jumped,

"S-sure"

I stuttered as i grabbed the dress and left to the changing room, a bit later and i walked out in the dress staring at the ground.

"Well? How do i look?"

I heard a few gasps and suddenly i was hugged by Jiro, Mina and Ochako

"YOU LOOK AMAZING!!"

(Again i really need to learn this)

"Well we're here!"

I heard Mina shout as i got out of the car and began to walk to the doors with her and Jiro next to me. I walked over to the benches to sit and look for Yuuga, see they asked me to go with them about two days before the dance and right after i picked out my dress.

"Bonjour Y/N! You look absolutely stunning darling but if i knew we were both wearing dresses i might have said something!"

I hear them laugh as i turned around to look at them, they were wearing a wonderful dark blue dress with a light blue cover that had sky blue swirls and dots. It had a cream colored ribon tied into a rose with greyish blue outlines, neon blue dots on the bottom and white swirls on the chest piece, it had a blue neck piece with a small white rose keeping it together, they had black gloves and a beaded arm piece on one arm. It was flowy and long like mine but the bottom split to show their legs and black rose vine heels with blue roses.

"You look amazing Yuuga!"

I blushed as they laughed and saw that they were wearing soft yellow lipstick, i was wearing dark blue. We really fit together,

"Well thank you! Care to dance?"

They asked holding out their hand.

"Of course!"

I grabbed their hand and we went to the dance floor, i put my hand on their waist and they put their hand on my shoulder, our other hands locked together and we begun to move to the song.

I nearing the end of my fourth year

I feel like ive been lacking, crying to many tears

Everyone seemed to say it was so great

But did i miss out? Was it a huge mistake?

I spun them a bit and we moved faster

I cant help the fact i like to be alone

It might sound kinda sad, but thatd just what i seem to know

I tend to handle things usually by myself

And i cant ever seem to try and ask for help

We clapped and they spun me our movements faster, one foot after the other i danced with them

Im sitting here, crying in my prom dress

I'd be the prom queen if crying was a contest

Makeup is running down

We laughed a bit and contuined

Feelings are all around

We blushed as we looked at each others eyes

How did i get here? i need to know

I guess i maybe had a couple expectations

Thought id get to them

I begun to dance away from them without realizing, my quirk was activating nad the light followed a pattern around me as i danced

But no i didn't

I guess i thought that prom was gonna be fun

But now im sitting on the floor and all i wanna do is run

I realized what i was doing when i felt everyone staring at me, i looked around scared before seeing Yuuga looking at me wide eyed.

"....i-i im sorry!....."

I ran out of the building in fear, i cant believe i did that! I kept running until i made it back to my dorm, i knew it was a bad idea to go to the dance.

(a few hours later)

*Knock knock*

"Hello? Darling its me"

I heard Yuuga through my door

"Darling im coming in.."

I heard the door open and saw them close it behind them

"..hey.."

I mumbled a "hello"

"..Yknow i thought your dance was amazing darling."

I looked at them with shock,

"Really?"

They nodded

"I'd still like to finish our dance if you dont mind.."

"Here?"

They hummed a "no"

"Not here, somewhere special. C'mon get cleaned up and we can go"

"...alright...thank you"

They hummed a response and waited outside while i fixed my makeup and put my shoes back on.

"Alright, where are we going?"

"You'll see"

(Wow so many of these in one story like damn)

Thousands of colored lights shined below us, we were on a grassy cliff aith a few trees.

"....woah this is....amazing.."

I felt Yuuga hug grab my hands with theirs and turn me around to face them

"So, wanna dance?"

I nodded glowing a soft gold

One foot after the other we danced slowly and calmly, it was peaceful and quiet besides the hum of the city below us.

We stared into each others eyes, the soft glow of the lights below us illuminating our faces. Closer amd closer our lips touched and our eyes closed, it was soft and a bit longer then a peck but it was amazing. Softs gasps as our eyes and lips parted,

"I...love you"

They sighed a bit

"I love you too Y/N.."

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Done! I really hope you all enjoyed because it took me a week to finish this, again none of the art or music in this is mine, Yuuga Aoyama belings to Horikoshi. I tried hard to make this longer and im glad it came out with over 1,000 words! Its the longest one ive written so far! Im proud of myself and again i hope you all enjoyed, if you have any tips feel free to send them to me as im always open to criticism - Author-san

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lovehelpmewrite · 4 years

Text

A Very Bad Day

Title: A Bad Day

Pairing: Gwil x OFC!Ella

Word Count: 3.7k

Summary: Ella is having a... less than amazing day. It turns out Gwilym is just what she needed to turn it around though.

Warnings: underage drinking i know bad dont do it im sorry

[A/N]: Okay so I know this is technically before Macarons and Spoiled Surprises but it’s been bothering me for months that I never wrote the middle step between our first date and us doing... y’know, you’ve read it i hope. So yeah, this is that middle step. Half inspired by an actual shit day I had, half inspired by my better half having had a bad day the day I wrote this. Enjoy and feedback is always welcome!! Also thank you thank you thank you to my best fren Mic @o-holynight for making me another amazing header just for this fic you’re so good to me and if you haven’t yet go through her masterlist because it slaps

It was a crappy day. It was pouring, which normally I wouldn't mind—in fact I loved a good rainy day—but I had opened my window the night before and woken up to find my desk soaked in rain water and one of my notebooks with it.

"Ahhh shit," I muttered to myself as I woke up and climbed out of bed at the sound of the rain hitting the desk. I quickly latched the thing closed and looked down at the crinkling wet paper that was my notebook, picking it up by a corner and watching the water slide off the cover and off the pages. "Shhhhhit," I repeated, feeling my heart sink when I opened the cover and noticed the ink either bleeding into the other pages or sliding off along with the water. At least I didn't really use it, I thought. It was still sad to see something that I'd paid for just... Fall apart like this though.

I dropped it into the trash bin with a sigh and vowed to start getting ready to go out and buy a new one. Right after I have breakfast, I thought. As it turns out, there was no breakfast. No cereal, no pancake mix or frozen waffles. It was grocery day and Michaela had just left saying she was going to grab Joe so they could do the shopping for both at once.

Okay so I'll go out for breakfast, I decided.

Except the coffee shop was closed. Again, no big deal but... It was another block in the freezing rain to the nearest cafe. It was too close to drive, especially because there was no parking down by it. Walking it is then. The sidewalk was slick with the freezing rain and the leftovers from the last snow so I tried my best to watch my steps and still maintain a quick pace.

Needless to say I almost slipped—I didn't thankfully—but I caught myself at the last second in such a way that my umbrella swung out to the side and in an instant I felt drenched to the bone. I walked in looking like a half-drowned rat, ordered a muffin to go and tried to calm my anxious heart at the stares I was getting from the other patrons. In case you were wondering, yes, it's possible to angrily eat a muffin.

After I made it back to my car I drove to the nearest Staples and practically moaned as the warm rush of air hit my chilled face and body. I picked out a cute notebook—for sixteen fucking dollars, jesus Staples, cost more yeah?—and slapped it on the counter. The younger looking kid checking me out started at the noise but just smiled and asked if I wanted to join their rewards program.

And then I was stood under the edge of the Staples sign trying to desperately shove the notebook in my jacket against my chest because what was once pouring rain had turned into a torrential downpour. It was like a sheet of water coming down at once while thunder boomed in the distance. I held an arm across my coat-covered-notebook and took a deep breath, readying myself for the sheer force of it to pound against the top of my umbrella.

By the time I got back to the dorm my legs up to my knees were soaked even despite my rain boots, as was the back of my coat and my umbrella. The notebook somehow survived the trip thankfully. As I was pulling it out of my jacket my phone buzzed in my coat pocket. A text from Mic.

Hey, over at the boys' and groceries are all put away

Is Gwil home? I might head over in a bit. Having a shit day :(

Aw im sorry :( he is tho I think. I'll ask

I waited a few seconds and then waited for the three dots while she typed.

He isn't but he's coming home in like half an hour from a reading

"Nice," I whispered to myself. Finally, something good today.

Im gonna shower. When he gets home tell him I'm coming?

Yeah ofc

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, glad to finally have something to look forward to. I took off my jacket and hung it on my door to dry before walking into the bathroom and peeling off my soaked jeans and socks, letting them sit on the floor while I turned the shower to scalding hot. I hissed as it hit my back but quickly adjusted to it, letting the water pooling at the bottom thaw my toes. I picked up my razor with a little indecision. He wasn't even going to see my legs or my armpits as far as I was planning, let alone anywhere near my underwear... I shaved anyway. As a way to pass time in the warm water at the least, and at the most it would make my sheets feel nice later.

I got dressed in some loose sweats and a tank top, foregoing a bra with the assumption I was the only one home but when I came out of my room Sarah was back from her class eating at the table.

"Hey!" She said with a smile.

"Hey," I said back quietly, walking to the cupboard and pulling down a bag of chips. "How was class?"

"Ugh, don't even get me started. That dude was still trying to argue with the professor the entire class," she explained, rolling her eyes.

"Someone should keep a tally of every time he says something and then at the end of class take that many points off his latest paper or something," I offered with a small grin.

"We should, oh my god," she laughed back. "Hey, are you okay? Mic said you were having a crappy day."

I nodded, shrugging. "Yeah, I dont know it's just... A lot of little shit adding up, y'know?"

She nodded with a sad smile.

I took a deep breath and tried to stay positive though. "Good news though, I'm heading over to see the boys in a little bit. Did you wanna come with?"

"Ah, I'm going to meet Ben for lunch after his class gets out in like half an hour."

"Ah," I said in confirmation. "Okay, I'll see you later tonight? We need another girls night in, it's been too long."

She smiled, nodding in agreement. "Yeah, I'll see if I can pick up some stuff beforehand. It's your turn to pick right?"

I nodded, "yeah."

"Okay, cool. Nothing scary please? I like sleeping without nightmares."

I laughed, carrying the chips with me back to my room. "I'll do my best to let you keep your beauty sleep," I said over my shoulder before closing the door.

I sat down on my bed with a sigh, dropping the chips next to me and reaching for my phone.

Gwil just got home, he's in the shower rn tho

Okay tell him im omw and I dont mind waiting or something

I made sure to pull on a sports bra and a sweatshirt before I left, as well as a pair of fuzzy socks inside my rain boots. I was nearly jogging across the street to the apartment, buzzing with excitement to see Gwil.

We haven't been out on any dates since our second when he kissed me, but we had a lot of days where we walked each other to class or we'd get lunch together. Sadly, we hadn't kissed much since then but we made up for it with a lot of hand holding, or his palm on my back, or my hand on his knee and honestly... it was kind of nice just like that. Still, a day like today deserved some serious hugs at the very least.

My frozen fingers shook as I pressed the buzzer and I exhaled in relief when it buzzed again and the lock clicked open, allowing me to rush into the warm elevator and ride up to the apartment. When I got up to the door though, I hesitated.

Do I knock? Do I just walk in? Do I knock and then walk in anyways?

I pulled out my phone and texted Mic.

Im outside the door

Come in lol?

Come open it I feel weird

Between the previous cold and my embarrassment I'm sure my cheeks were tomato-red. She just smiled upon seeing me, waiting for me to take off my dripping boots and then motioning her head toward the couch.

"Gwil's probably getting out soon, you can wait with me and Joe on the couch," she explained, sitting back down next to Joe to watch whatever movie they had playing on the TV. I perched awkwardly on the edge of the cushion, trying—and failing—to control my bouncing knee while I waited for Gwil.

"Hey."

I almost jumped at the soft greeting, springing off the couch and turning to him. My heart was thumping in my chest nervously.

He was just in sweats and a t-shirt but something about it was just so… hot. I hadn't noticed how shaggy his hair was getting until now, still dripping wet and hanging over his forehead a little. I almost missed when he jerked his thumb over his shoulder.

"Do you wanna… my room?" He asked awkwardly.

I nodded enthusiastically. "Yeah- sure yeah."

I followed quietly behind him as he walked down the hall, stepping into the room and waiting for him to close the door. Then I was stuck just watching while he moved to sit on the edge of his bed with a bounce. I pressed my lips together to suppress an awkward smile, looking around his room. He had different playbills taped up on his wall above his bed, and his desk was covered in papers and packets and textbooks.

"So…" I started, bringing my eyes back to face him.

"So…" he mimicked back, a gentle smile growing on his face.

I breathed out a little laugh and moved to sit next to him on the edge of his mattress, copying his bounce from before and then bumping my shoulder into his.

"So how was your reading? How did it go?" I asked lightly, trying to start some sort of conversation, any conversation.

"Good! It was good," he answered back.

And then more quiet.

"Okay this is awful," I admitted before I could stop the words from coming out of my mouth.

Gwil's eyebrows shot up in surprise, like he couldn't believe I was saying it.

"Can we just like… I don't know, can we just watch something on your laptop or something? I just…" I blew out a quick breath and started to feel my eyes burn with tears I'd been holding in. "I've had a really shitty day and I was so excited to come over and see you and I don’t want it to be all... weird like it is."

He was quiet for a second, which gave me some time to calm back down a little and not actually shed tears.

"You're right," he sighed, running his fingers through his hair. "Okay, why don't we… Do you have something in mind to watch?"

It was my turn to raise my eyebrows. "I mean I… what do you normally watch? What's your favorite show?"

It seemed to do the trick, the tension slowly released its grip on the room and we even managed to move back on his bed so he was positioned laying against his pillows and I was tucked neatly under his arm, half laying on his stomach. We'd agreed on Criminal Minds and somehow watched our way through two entire episodes before we forgot it all together and started talking… and then, well, kissing.

It started off innocent enough. I'd turned my head to joke about Spencer's hair in this season but instead found Gwil already looking at me with a soft smile.

"What?" I laughed.

He just gave a full smile and shook his head. "Nothing."

We were both quiet for a second, and then he leaned in and gave me a peck on the lips.

Oh.

I smiled back and leaned back into him, pressing my lips to his again but longer this time, slower, lingering…

We pulled back slowly, eyes still half closed. And then I felt the slightest squeeze of his hand on my waist and he surged forward again, lips firmly against mine, his tongue teasing across my bottom lip before biting gently.

Oh.

I hummed in appreciation, leaning further against him until my leg hooked in between his and his hand was sliding up my back into my hair and grabbing lightly.

My heart was racing in my chest. Was this it? Was I going to fuck him not 50 feet from our friends? Why am i even thinking that? Calm the hell down.

I practically had to force myself to pull away, my fist still twisted in his shirt, still breathing heavily and close enough to be tempted to go back but I made myself stop.

"We have to… we should just slow down a little," I said quietly.

Gwil nodded in agreement. "Yeah. Yeah you're right we should just… take it easy for a bit."

I nodded back.

Still, we somehow gravitated towards each other again until we were kissing again, albeit softer this time. Somehow we managed to keep it slow. Calm. Instead of dipping back into... dangerous territory. It was just… nice.

It was comforting and reassured a lot of doubts I had. It was almost like a little dance, like a conversation. He'd lean forward and catch my lip with his teeth and in return I'd slide my tongue against his lip. It was jarring when suddenly everything went quiet and we both pulled apart in question only to see Netflix asking if we were still watching.

I laughed a little which seemed to make Gwil laugh which made me laugh more and snort and then he laughed more until we were both clutching our stomachs gasping for air in between laughs. Once we'd finally calm down we were left just staring at each other, not waiting for the other to talk, just looking at each other's faces and smiles and eyes.

"Y'know I was having a pretty crappy day and you made it a hell of a lot more bearable," I said honestly.

"I'm happy I could make your day better," he answered back, his smile wide.

I paused for a minute, contemplating saying anything. "Is it… is it weird if I really like making out with you?"

He shook his head quickly, "no! No of course not. I'm glad my skills were… put to good use." His smile turned smug.

I shoved his chest jokingly, turning in his grasp like I was going to roll away. I grinned when his hand fell to my hip and pulled me back in against him so his mouth was slotted against mine.

"Where do you think you're going?"

"To find someone with better lines I guess," I laughed.

"Are you saying you don't like my pick up lines?" He fake pouted, lips puckered out and all.

I gave him a quick kiss. "That's exactly what I'm saying." I laughed again when he dramatically flopped against the bed like he couldn't believe it. I kissed his jaw sweetly, turning it into a raspberry which made him laugh.

"Careful there, I don't need any weirdly placed hickies," he warned with a grin.

"So just for clarification, you don't want a big hickey on your cheek?" I asked, pretending to get ready to mark his cheek.

"Definitely not."

"Hmm," I hummed in mock disappointment. "And I had such plans too."

"Yeah, I'm sure," he said back, turning his head to face me and tucking a piece of hair behind my ear. He slowly leaned in and gave me another peck on the lips, and then another… and then one more. "You know, I'm really glad you came over."

I smiled back at him. "Me too."

We were quiet once again, just staring at each other again, every once in a while saying some small comment or joke or compliment but otherwise quiet. After a little bit, just when I was starting to feel sleepy, there was a quiet knock on the door.

"Come in," Gwil answered.

Michaela poked her head in after a second with a small smile. "Hey, I was just going to head back, it's almost six," she said softly.

"Oh Jesus, is it really?" I asked in surprise, picking up my phone to see texts from Sarah asking when I'd be back home. "Damn," I laughed slightly.

"Yeah, Sarah said you wanted to do a night in so do you wanna go to the store before home?"

I nodded, slowly untangling myself from Gwil and sitting up, stretching out my muscles. "Yeah, I'll be out in a few minutes, I gotta get the feeling back in my legs," I chuckled.

"Okay, I'll go pull on my shoes."

I stretched out each of my arms and legs, turning awkwardly to stretch my spine before I sighed, turning back to face a very tired looking Gwilym. "Hi."

"Hi," he grinned back, briefly stretching his back before relaxing back against his pillows. "Before you go, come here."

I grinned and leaned back in, our lips connecting for a long, sweet kiss. "Was that all?" I asked after it ended.

"No, one more," he smirked, pulling me back in for another peck. "Okay one more," and then another peck, "just one more-"

"Gwil," I laughed in between kisses. "I- gotta- go- you big dork-"

He gave a big dramatic sigh after the last kiss when I stood up away from him. "Fine, if you must."

"I must," I grinned. "Sorry bub."

"No it's okay," he relented with a smile. "I'll see you on Saturday, right? You're still coming over to hang out?"

I nodded. "Of course, I can't wait." I was reluctant to leave him, looking so soft and inviting and ready for a nap… I forced myself to walk out and close the door behind me, walking out to the living room to find Mic pulling on her shoes while Joe stood by.

"Hey," I announced, making her look up at me after she had both boots on.

"Hey, ready?"

"Yep, lets go get drunk," I affirmed.

"Woah woah woah," Joe interjected, making me turn to him.

"Sorry dad, was I not supposed to tell you that?" I laughed.

"No drinking and driving young lady, be responsible," he said, pointing a faux serious finger at each of us.

"Sure, yeah, whatever you say," I dismissed with a grin. I turned to Mic, "want anything particular? I was planning on wine and some candy."

She shrugged. "Sounds good to me. Grab me some of the uhh the sour patch watermelon things though? Oh! And Reece's pieces," she grinned at the last second as I was walking out the door.

"You already know," I grinned back, shaking my head and closing the door to let her and Joe do their own little goodbyes.

When I made it back down to the front door, ready to open my umbrella and sprint to my car, I noticed it had stopped raining. It was still wet everywhere and puddles took up half the sidewalk but the once black sky was lightened to a pale gray. Michaela beat me back to the dorm, unsurprisingly and I walked in with full arms, happy to be greeted by Sarah and Mic pulling things out of my hands and already opening things.

"Yesss you got the good shit Ella," Sarah said gratefully, pulling out a bag of m&m's.

"Always," I smiled, pulling out a plastic container of cotton candy for myself.

"Okay so what are we watching?" Sarah asked, already transporting stuff to the couches.

It was obvious the two of them had moved everything for optimal TV viewing.

"I was thinking Umbrella Academy if that's cool?"

They both nodded, mouths already full of candy.

I laughed. "Okay, Umbrella Academy it is then. I'll grab the wine."

Somewhere between the third and fourth episode we'd finished the first bottle of wine and went to open the second only to find it impossible.

"Just… open it," Sarah laughed, watching me trying to use the wine bottle opener to grab the cork and failing.

"I'm trying!" I laughed back, pulling out pieces of cork instead of the entire thing. "Dammit! Mic come help us!" I called.

The TV paused as she came over and looked over the destroyed cork, pushed nearly all the way into the bottle. "Dude what did you even do?!" She chuckled.

"I tried to open it, what do you think!" I laughed back.

"Okay, gimme a spoon, I'll shove it into the bottle."

"What? No take it out!" Sarah laughed.

"I can't! This one-" Mic laughed, pointing at me, "destroyed the cork and now its not gonna come out!"

I was wheezing from laughing so hard, practically laying across the counter. "I'm sorry!"

Sarah laughed at my reaction in response, squatting next to the counter trying to catch her breath as well.

"Fine I'll find a spoon myself!" Mic declared, still laughing while she tried to push down on the cork. "Ahah!" She yelled in triumph making us laugh even harder at the pop of it dropping into the wine.

We ate our way through almost all of the candy and the two bottles of wine over five episodes before we decided to call it a night (or well, early morning but same thing).

It was nice, to go to bed feeling warm and loved and like a crap day had turned good. I fell asleep easily and without resistance, the opposite to how I'd woken up. It was a good day, I decided.

- - -

feedback is always appreciated and thank you for reading lovelies!!

#borhap #borhap cast #borhap cast au #college au #borhap boys #gwilym lee #gwilym lee x ofc #gwilym lee fluff #ayhtdifil

12 notes · View notes

autobaby · 4 years

Text

i was like pls throw me a source to buy clothes from so i can leave the house more often but then i remember that its literally not about the clothes yes its a little bit about the clothes but its mostly about my horrible body dysmorphia i cant even justify buying new clothes or have any interest in it at all cause everything looks so bad on me i dont even need to try it on and i only mostly thrift or shop online anyways there are no thrift stores here and if there are its like super expensive vintage second hand clothes there’s nothing in stores that i even remotely like and its super expensive buying new clothes would just be a huge waste of money and materials i prob wont even wear it like i cant even imagine a pair of pants or bottoms that i could wear rn like at all without feeling and looking like a barrel tbh like seriously i cant even imagine a slightly flattering outfit cause im fat everywhere ive been fat for so long now i mean mostly fat sudden fluctuations dont count and ive never learned to how to dress for this body without looking like a sack of fertilizer in my head and grossing myself out like what can i wear when ive gained so much weight idk oversized shirts but oversized shirts arent oversized anymore if you can see your belly sticking out idk how to dress this body with an unshapely uneven ever changing size and silhouette ive even watched videos on ‘oversized’ styling thats supposed to not make u look heavier than you already are but everything just seems uncomfortable like clothes in general is uncomfortable to me even wearing a sleep shirt is uncomfortable cause it rides up while i sleep and its uncomfortable im super picky about underwear too i mean all underwear expect for super stretched out ones are uncomfortable when you’re fat cause the fat roll is either inside or outside of the fabric and both are super comfortable the stretched out ones are uncomfortable too cause they dont fit to your body and move around and are loose just having so much extra fat is so uncomfortable i cant breathe properly with all the fat rolls suffocating me whenever i sit down or slightly hunch over my thighs rub together so much its always sticky im so sweaty all the time especially inbetween my belly rolls thats super triggering and gross i hate being hot and sticky not to even mention my chest fat and how gross that makes me feel i also dont own any bras and im not gonna start buying any or wearing them i mean sports bras yes but they dont fit anymore they’re so tight and suffocating and uncomfortable omg i feel like im gonna faint if i try to wear one wtf am i supposed to do food is my only coping mechanism i feel so fucking stupid everytime i order fast food again bc i hate it it tastes disgusting its so expensive and its literal shit that im putting in my body and it doesnt even taste good at all it makes me wanna vomit but i keep ordering fast food bc its food and its fast duh whenever i need something to distract me i watch mukbangs and i order food and binge i really should be banned from watching mukbangs but then what will i do for quick distraction i hate eating so much i dont even enjoy fruit anymore i mean ive lost all pleasure and enjoyment from anything for a long time now especially with food its so sad i only eat to abuse myself and to cope and distract myself and i only eat shit the shittest most processed high carb high fat high sugar foods that u can get and i have to force feed myself everyday cause i have no appetite i cant stop until i find something else to replace food with please help me find something to replace it with i need another coping mechanism but it cant be smoking cause smoking makes me wanna eat more too and its so bad for my throat and lungs please let me find a replacement for food please make me stop if you read this whole thing u’re a hero but also why

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chut-je-dors · 4 years

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oh well you’re lucky guys cos while most of the cut scenes are CRAP due to their unedited nature, we deemed these ones good enough. So here you have the FIRST TIME John EVER appeared... where we STARTED, from the beginning of the fic where Paul first comes in... and then a scene from where he’s just left. After that, the scene where Paul saw John sitting in a cafe, then ran into Ringo on the way out... who was there meeting a friend ;)

The Brrrrothel ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), [06.09.17 01:29]

"D'you think there'll be anyone good tonight?" Carol asked lazily from where she was stretched on a red velvet armchair. Her bright green lacy bra contrasted wonderfully with it, and her left breast seemed keen on escaping from its prison.

"In Liverpool? Hah," John snorted and leaned forward, quickly fixing Carol's bra. "You're showing off, love."

"Hands off," Carol grinned. "Or pay up a fiver."

"A fiver?" John raised an eyebrow. "For me, touching is a ten."

He straightened his back and looked around the brothel's downstairs. There were quite a many customers this evening, but none of them had approached John yet. Many of the... prettier birds, so to say, had already left with regular clients, and now there were maybe ten left, hanging around the small bar area. Aside from John, there were maybe four other male whores present that night, but John really didn't think there would be any clients for them tonight. There rarely were, at least less than for the women.

"Ooh," Carol said as the door opened and a young man stepped in. "Fresh meat. Haven't seen 'im around before."

John just watched, noticing the slightly lost look on the man's face. He was dead handsome... Someone that was definitely John's type. He was clutching a small card in his hand that John recognised as the Rusty Pipe's gift card -something that had once made him laugh out loud. He had bestowed those gift cards upon his friends ever since, as birthday and christmas presents, and no one really wanted them anymore.

"I wonder if he knows what he's looking for," Carol snickered and John hushed her, crossing his arms over his (almost) bare chest, taking a small step forward. The man was sinfully good-looking, and John wanted to have a good enough view, for what this sight lasted.

The Brrrrothel ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), [11.09.17 00:57]

John stepped back into the bar five minutes before the next round. Aside from his hair being slightly messier than an hour ago and his face being decorated by a large grin, no one could have said that he had just had his face gloriously fucked by a gorgeous man (who hopefully wasn't having a too big of a crisis going on at the moment).

"Now there's a happy man," Carol commented from her chair; it seemed that she had had no luck fishing clients. Her left boob was showing again.

"Inarguably," John chuckled and sat down at the bar, reaching into the pocket of his trousers, pulling out the results of the previous session.

He unrolled the money and stared at it.

30 pounds for two blowjobs??

"Hey, how much? Did you take a screwdriver up your ass?" Sally exclaimed next to him, leaning closer. John leaned instinctively back, protecting his money.

"Just gave head twice," he said, his voice confused. This was certainly a rare occurrence... Especially with a client like Paul, who would probably never step a foot into the brothel again.

...Then again, John was damn good, so maybe he'd come back?

"That's unfair! And he was so good-looking too," Sally whined. "Why do you get always so lucky?!"

"My natural charms, darling," John smiled and pocketed the money just as the door opened, and a big, bulky man walked in, eyeing the room already, before his eyes landed on John.

"Oh look," John called, "Roland the Arse Destroyer is back. How was the sea?"

"I can give you all the details behind that door," the client, John's less regular regular, nodded towards the wooden door. John grinned and jumped to his feet, stretching and readying himself mentally.

"And I'll tell you how much I've missed your dick," he winked. "A deal?"

The man's face broke into a grin, and John led the way, humming contently. This was definitely a good night!

The Brrrrothel ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), [20.09.17 22:33]

John tapped his foot against the café floor impatiently, glancing at his wrist watch every now and then. Ringo was late - as usual - and John's patience was wearing thin. He had been waiting for grand 15 minutes, and every minute passed here alone made him think about the sad fact that he didn't have a cat, and wanted one, but the landlord wouldn't allow it, and that was sad. John's mind tended to go back to that thought every now and then.

The café he was in had originally been a charming little bookshop, and now it had been turned into a bookshop/café. Basically the idea was that you could buy some tea for yourself, then go browse the books, and read as much as you liked, and you could buy the book as well. John liked the idea, and since he knew the son of the owner quite well (..........from business), it was quite habitual to come here for all kind of meetings.

John had secured a small table for the two from the café part of the shop, and groaned when the hand of the watch moved veeeery slowly to show that Ringo was now twenty minutes late.

He let his head fall on the table with a small thud and closed his eyes. He would make Ringo suffer for this. John was not the most punctual person either, but he at least had the sense of good timing - had to, with his job an' all.

'Next time,' he thought and turned his head so that his cheek was squished against the table, 'I'm gonna come thirty minutes later, and if he's still late, then, I'm gonna throw him off a bridge.'

John looked up from his phone when there was a scrape of a chair against the floor, and was met with Ringo's blue eyes shining down on him.

He grimaced, and Ringo started chuckling.

"Yeah, er, I'm sorry mate," he said and sat down, having the decency to look apologising, at least. "Got caught up, and then there was a friend just there at the door, and-"

"I'm not really interested," John rolled his eyes. "But I've been here for an half an hour - that's enough to come twice, so you're really late."

Ringo laughed and settled comfortably into the chair, placing his phone on the table. John did the same, and let himself grin at the man. He was a bastard, right, but a good one.

"So, how's work been?" Ringo asked, and John knew him well enough to know that the man was honestly curious. John usually had great stories to tell that somehow hit the nerve in young men. (Gee, he wondered why.)

"The same old same o," he said and rubbed at the back of his ear with his little finger, leaning slightly forward. The movement made him wince, and Ringo burst into laughter.

"It seems so," he said between slightly hysteric giggles. John rolled his eyes.

"Roland the Arse Destroyer came back," he said, and Ringo gasped dramatically.

"Not the Roland!"

They laughed together, and John took a sip of his (cold) tea.

"And you?" he raised an eyebrow.

"Nothing much," Ringo grinned. "Then again, we saw each other this Wednesday, so..."

"Yeah," John nodded good-naturely, smiling into his (COLD) tea. "Only my life is interesting enough to talk about."

Ringo laughed and decided to go fetch some tea as well, and John told him to get another one for him. The man kind of owned it to him, anyway.

#hope you like em!!!#also can i just say: UNEDITED #CRAP #DRAFTS #NOT TOUCHED BY PUCK #WRITTEN ON THE MOVE SITTING IN A BUS OR SMTH EQUAL #= U N E D I T E D #anyway isn't it nice to see that john once was happy #:)#there are so much more but............#i mean i can post more if you wanna see em but...........#ghkdfhjhg #ten minutes #anonymous #answered

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tempestshakes01 · 4 years

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06-21-20

aw, ok,

I was thinking more about my last days in Sp/okane (full post about that another day!) when I remembered that ~literally~ the day before I left to Seattle to pick up my parents I met the CUTEST guy at my favorite thrift shop.

Yes, so I went to the shop to drop off a bunch of clothes and the few larger items I could carry by myself (the rest my dad was going to help me drop off when we drove back from the western half of the state). Me being Mira, this meant I could not resist going inside and...go shopping for more clothes. I needed jeans! Sp/okane thrift spots have the best selection of good quality jeans at a steal.

Anyway, it was Saturday--I think...because it was very busy and the line at the fitting booths was super long which only happened on Saturdays when they had their sales. ANYWAY, who cares, the line was long. I had my lil cart filled to brim knowing I’d be taking a while because you can only take 6 items in at a time. One lady in front of me was sighing all loud and making noise about how many people were around. The next lady in front of me also had a massive haul and then her daughter came and joined her with another big cart, but I didn’t mind because I was doing last-minute emails on my phone for STEM camps (parents got links to our class videos...after 3 years I really got that shit down...my camp was so funnnnnn).

Then an older man comes up with three work shirts. I’m supposed to be next in line but I know that 3 out of the 4 booths are being used by the ladies with lots of stuff to try on and I have a lot too, so I let him go in front of me. He’s so sweet and like, “Are you sure? Are you sure? I just don’t know which blue will look best so my wife told me to try them on.” And we chatted amiably before a booth opened up.

OKAY, so I don’t know why I’m telling this story with so MUCH unnecessary detail, lol, I think I’m procrastinating the rest of my day, but--

A guy who I originally thought was a shopper came over and turns out he was an employee. He helped out one of the rude ladies (the mom) and then started organizing the area right by the dressing booths. And like, I was trying not to really look at or chat with people becauseeeeee this was still at that time when my voice was almost completely blown out. Like, I remember this afternoon cause later I went climbing with J and N, and I sounded like a witch. And my allergies were so-so, and I had hives still, and I wasn’t wearing any make-up, and my hair was quite messy, and I just remember thinking I looked like shit, sounded like shit, but I was overall in a super good mood, lol. (again, more about my last days in Spokane in another post)

So when I let the older man ahead of me, and he went into the booth, the worker guy [let’s call him...Caleb. I don’t know his name, but he looked like a Caleb], surprises me by saying, “wow, that was really nice of you”.

(also because i had forgotten he was there and he was literally like a foot away from me at the clothes hanger you put go-backs on so he leaned over and i was like oh yeah this cute guy)

AND OKAY, you’re like, Miranda, that’s so dumb that you carry that moment with you for a year, but lemme just clarify...it’s the way he said. He was so...ugh, hot, and it made me feel so good at the time because he said it like he was kinda surprised someone was nice (hahaha), but also very warmly. It made me glow. I don’t know how to explain it. This is so dumb now that I’m typing it out, but I didn’t even blush at the time!!! Me!!! I didn’t blush!!! I simply felt like,,,wow,,,,thank you hot guy for being so nice. Oh, that’s it!!! The way he said it felt kind. In this weird way. Like, I suddenly knew that he was a very kind person. vIBES, ya know.

So nothing more of interest happened because as soon as I basked in the glow of his warmth and kindness and hotness, and said, “thanks” in my scratchy as hell voice...I remembered I am me (acne scars (my skin was going thru a time probably bc of how much weed I was smoking lol), hives, messy hair, witch-voiced) and that right now was not the best time to be talking to such a sweetheart, so I smiled and pretended to finish my emails for another 5 minutes when a door opened up and it was my turn.

It was the booth nearest the go-backs so I tucked my lil cart behind it and Caleb (lol I forgot I named him) said he’d watch my stuff. And so I tried on all my stuff. Took like 15-20~ mins cause again! Big haul! Cute jeans! A sports bra! Dresses!

After figuring out when I wanted, I started to roll my lil cart to the only register open, when Caleb hopped over from the go-backs and said he could ring me up, but I dunno what I was thinking (that I didn’t want to be rung-up by the hot guy...let that other girl go.....she was already making her way toward him) and I ignored him (lol), but he said “hey, i’m open” from behind the register and not noticing the other girl making a b-line toward him, we made eye contact and he was like, “I got you!” and waved me over so I no choice but sheepishly tug my lil cart to his register where the afternoon light was streaming in behind him making his blonde hair glow and his clear blue eyes shine brighter (lMAO i’m totally making that up...I don’t remember if his eyes with blue but I remember they were so warm and pretty so let’s go with blue).

So he starts to make conversation and I chat with him even tho I sound like I’m parched and 100 years old, and he’s super friendly and we are VIBING. We’ve got that flirty thing and he’s got tattoos and his haircut is obviously from a barber and sharp and he’s very upbeat in a natural way.........and i just like him. immediately. So we’re talking and he asks me what college I go to...........lol.......and I say that I’m out of college. He says, oh, when did you graduate.....and I literally had to pause and mentally calculate and I even made a joke about how I’m so old I have to think about it......and he asks me how old I am and I say that I turned 25 in May. And he gets quiet for a second, tells me I don’t look 25 and I say that’s what all the kids say cause i work with kids lollllll, he shrugs, and then starts our convo with the same energy it started with but THEN I tell him about my car getting hit and he.........tells me how to fix it or something........my taillight........and says he’s gonna start school for autoworkers and become a mechanic (hot) and his dream is to own his own shop, and I’m like, that’s so cool, yada yadda, and THEN he says, yeah, he got into a great program after graduation..............and I pause, because graduation. And I go, “Cool, what college did you graduate from” because I’m dumb and I wanted him to have just graduated from college, but no he goes, “Uh, high school. I went to [redacted]................[big pause]............I’m 18.” And I go, “OH.”

And I don’t think it registered to him that I was like, not gonna flirt with him now that I knew he was a 😭 child, until I said that hard “oh”, lollllll, but again he kinda paused and rolled with it saying he was gonna give me the “college girl” discount and it’d be between us, no worries, and I was like “oh thank you sweet young man” (not really im not that much of a nerd but i was getting that sort of sentiment across) and he was getting it at this point, so he kinda sheepishly said, “I’ll see you around?”

but no, I was gonna move the next day, but I said yes and walked out shaken at how we were totally vibing and I started crushing on him cause he was so hot and so nice and the sun was shining behind him in a halo and I looked like crap but he was still flirting and then he had to be 18. lmao.

so sad.

#miranda this is your life

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