#im trying to put my art into a place without all my reblogs so its easier to scroll through but GAHHGHGHH AGHGHG

[nerdsinc]

after 30 hours of work, i finally drew every single version of matoro, redesigned in my style! he's my favourite character of all time so i decided to put a ton of love into this drawing. theres lots of little cool details which ill go into more depth on under the cut!

(as always, PLEASE reblog so my art gets circulated!! it would be very, VERY appreciated! thank you, ily!!)

every version of him has a sad expression, though i tried to make it the most prominent in the last three. i think hes just tend to have a sad look in his eyes even when hes not actually that sad.

his 2nd matoran form has the gear part stylized to look like a tail, and i added a shorter version to the 1st matoran form to imply that it just 'grew' over time

his toa inika design has the same tail as the first two matoran forms, but its been broken, the gear no longer on it. it shares the same transparency as the other parts of his design, and is shaped like a lightning strike to call back to how he became a toa in the first place

the toa mahri design doesnt quite have a tail, instead having the tube broken, having the silhouette of a tail without actually being one.

the 2nd matoran design has a scarf, i like to imagine that he wore it almost constantly, but it was taken when he went to karzahni, and he never recovered it. kopaka later did, and ended up wearing it in memory of matoro

every design has the same hair-like mask (originally how i stylize the akaku), and has a asymetric design where one side is a bit longer. the mahri mask looks more like the akaku, however the iden looks less like it, with the ""hair"" being much longer and pulled back. this was to try and show how he didnt really feel like himself as a toa inika, and how that mask was very much so not him (as it was its own separate entity after all) but once he became a toa mahri he felt a bit more like himself again.

i tried to make it look like he was wearing winter gloves in most of the designs, though its most obvious in the 2nd matoran and mahri designs

i stylized the iden a bit so that it looked like he had horns, my thought process there was just kinda "karzahni = hell so i guess it makes sense"

each one has lines under their eyes, with the 2 matorans having ones similar to the markings on the akaku, toa inika having ones similar to the iden that also are meant to subtly look like tear streaks, and the mahri having ones that very subtly are meant to look like the lines on the ignika mask

more red accents on the mahri design, to call back to the red flag, and also to teridax/maxilos

while i didnt draw in most of their weapons, mahri kept the twin cutter and i just made it an attachment to his hand

the red axle piece in the mahri foot piece is actually a piece i thought was included in the set itself. i bought my mahri matoro second hand, and apparently along with him being in bad shape he also just had those parts added there for some reason? so i drew it in thinking that it was correct. just learnt today that that was false. but i like it so im keeping it

there mightve been more details i added, but thats all i remember right now!

[mousemilf]

i feel like seeing the world through actions rather than character seems like you're subconsciously distant and dissociated from yourself; as though some deep-seated insecurity or anxiety about an inherent personality trait means that you place value specifically on behavior and not personality.

for example, is a person artistic simply because they make art, or are they compelled to make art because they have this specific inexplicable draw and desire to do so? would someone who was not innately kind or interested in being kind "do" kind things?

which innate trait were you born with that drives you to assume that different opinions must stem from a psychological issue?

anyway, no, i am not innately artistic. nobody (or everybody, which is essentially the same thing) is. i bothers me that we treat art as so much more sacred than other human activities. would you say the same about someone whos hobby is collecting funko pops? are they driven by an inexplicable desire to collect shit figurines?

making art is something i know how to do. its a skill ive acquired, like cooking or driving a car. to attribute it to an innate talent would be to erase the years of study and practice ive put in. if its more initially rewarding because i have any natural advantage, it might be that i have pretty good fine motor skills, but thats a neutral physical trait like my height or weight, which i dont glean any meaningful identity from either. but maybe that initial aptitude led to more satisfaction, encouragement etc which has naturally caused me to think about art more than someone who did not start with that immediate small advantage.

ive had the privilege of teaching hobby painting classes to people who are not skilled and would not consider themselves "artistic," and everybodys reactions when they learn a new technique and make something they thought they couldnt is proof to me that art making is rewarding to *everybody,* not just a special class of divinely ordained creatives. i fundamentally do not believe that i am unique for finding art fulfilling. it feels good to make stuff. thats just human.

as far as kindness goes, if there are intrinsically kind people, it would follow that there are intrinsically unkind people, right? people who are born without kindness as an innate trait... so then what would be the point of trying to rehabilitate people whove committed violent crimes? if they dont have that inherent drive for kindness that innately kind people do, then it would be hopeless, right?

if we can neatly divide people into categorically kind and categorically unkind people i guess it would be much easier for us kind people (im at least flattered that you assume id be on that side of the dichotomy) to like, just be confident that we are morally in the right and not ever have to question the actual impact of our behavior since our intentions are good by virtue of this innate trait we were born with. sure whatever.

assigning importance to intentions and feelings rather than actions and their impact is like very yuckydisgusting to me. like i said in my reblog right before this, if kind thoughts were enough to make someone a kind person, then negative thoughts would be enough to make someone a bad person. silly and obviously wrong. i've fantasized about all kinds of destructive actions, but it literally does not matter at all, the only important thing is my choice not to act on those fantasies.

wanting or trying to be a kind person does not make someone a kind person. some of the nastiest motherfuckers ive ever met were constantly agonizing over whether they were a good person and looking for reassurance that they hadnt done wrong. yet they continued to act selfishly and harm people around them. their desire to be kind did jack shit.

but yeah, i do place value specifically on behavior because thats the only part of personality that meaningfully exists to literally anybody outside of your brain. basically. i think thats the main point of all of this.

[detectivehole]

hey man the anti-AI stuff you reblog is rly. Reactionary idk how else to put it. It’s a mixed bag. AI has been used in art for a LONG time, it’s not as new as ppl think it is. It’s used a lot in animation especially. Obviously there is a difference between AI as a tool and AI as a replacement for artists/writers, but nearly every single instance of them attempting this has been catastrophically bad. (Doesnt stop the dumbass studios like Disney and Pixar to keep trying it tho, bc they value short term profit over any actual value) For AI being used in a professional setting, it’s imperative the distinction be made between tool or replacement. Machines, despite how efficient they have become, are managed by humans. Letting them run without a person actually operating it that knows what they’re trying to do is always a bad idea.

However, using AI generated pics for like. Personal use? Let’s say you aren’t a good artist, or as many have pointed out, can’t be an artist due to disability (none of that inspiration porn abt painting w your mouth some ppl can’t do that either.) and you’d like a picture of your Tabletop game character or OC or something, and you do not have the money to spare for a commission from the artist you like. Doesn’t mean you can’t pay for one later on, as a human will take the finer details you want and bring them to life, but if you’re looking for like. A placeholder? And you aren’t planning on selling it or some shit, then ppl shouldnt get on your case. Except every anti-AI bro now hears “AI” and flies into a frothing rage, saying it’s “never ok”. Nobody should care of somebody made a meme using AI or tried to make something just for themselves or friends. It becomes an issue when it’s being marketed as a “replacement” for artists.

Tldr: AI is a useful tool, the tech bros that got a hold of ot do not represent the entire scope of it. If it is used as a tool or personal use, it’s not an issue. It only becomes one when it is used as an explicit replacement for writers/artists.

i agree with the first paragraph, though im a little insulted you'd assume my knowledge and opinions on AI image generation were so shallow and uninformed as to have to explain it to me- but you lost me after that

first off, i wanna make it clear that basically no one thinks you're some sort of amoral monster for having used or even enjoyed what AI image generation and art can give you. most people genuinely don't understand the intricacies of its ethics and effects, and while ignorance like that is annoying, it's something most people who do get it understand and forgive with a sorta... exasperation. most of the time. now, maybe you're not coming from a place of good faith, i can't say, but i choose to think you are

i don't have the chops, time, or particular desire to explain what exactly is wrong with AI art generation (there's a lot in way too many directions), so i'll just give you a link to get you started (it's not a long read, just some basic critiques to jump from) and some admittedly harsh sounding (but well meant) advice that pertains to your particular use of AI:

you dont always get what you want. you're not entitled, for any reason, to the fruits of stolen (and popular AI datasets have been proven to unequivocally be stolen) artistic labor, especially if that theft is impacting the livelihoods of independent artists. (and don't give me "what about other generic media piracy" because that's its own can of worms and you know it. i won't hear it). it's not the end of the world that you have, but it's just not ethical to generate that art knowing it's based off stolen work- if it was all consensually given data it'd be different- and sometimes behaving ethically means you dont get what you want. tough shit. plenty of people can't or won't draw for all sorts of reasons, and none of those reasons suddenly make it ok for them to take other people's art

to be clear, if all the datasets used to train AI were ethically sourced- bought, donated, or taken from free use material- this wouldn't be an issue. i mean there would still totally be issues with casual generative AI, but this particular issue would be moot. the issue with AI art isn't the AI, it's what the AI's being fed. every time you engage with it gets smarter, and better, and more efficient at chewing up its stolen foods and spitting out a knockoff. the issue is what it's being fed and you are putting tokens in the little treat machine at its petting zoo enclosure

you want a placeholder? you got picrew. doll dress up games. hell, pester your friends for doodles. save up. or even just learn to handle not getting it at all- just pick something else

[rosekasa]

ive yet to finish an art project since december bc ive been so down abt my work. im startjng to feel like a one trick pony, like i can only make one good art im proud of and never again. each type i set out to make something it just doesn't turn out good so i delete it and start again and rinse and repeat. its nice to know that its not just me who feels this way

baby you are NOT alone!! at a time where most of the art we consume is through the norms of social media it can be so hard to remember that art is not just about making a good 'finished product' and that your value as an artist isn't about your work looking like those of the people you see with thousands of followers. feeling proud of your work comes from feeling proud of yourself. i have so many pieces that objectively are Not good but i feel filled with so much love when i look at them because i remember how happy i was while creating it. but then i have pieces that have gotten thousands of reblogs but i physically cannot bring myself to look at them for too long because while i was drawing it i was constantly thinking about whether it will look good, whether it will fit the idea i had in my head, etc. etc.

I don't know if it's any consolation to hear this, but the feelings triggered in you when you see a result you don't like are not concrete nor are they a true depiction of who you are. you are a wonderful, skilled, creative artist and i can say this to you without knowing who you are and knowing your work because to be that kind of person is to think you are that kind of person. the more you tell yourself not to be nervous about your art not turning out good and focus on creating the things that make you feel joy with confidence, the more your art WILL start to look good, i promise.

i wanted to share some examples with my own art and my feelings about it so if you're not interested don't worry qjkskw im just putting it under here

i think this was my most reblogged piece in 2022 but i dont think ive seen it closeup since then because it does not make me feel good when i look at it. when i sat down to draw this i was so stressed about making it look a certain way. i was trying to use all this technical knowledge like forumlas to make it look 'perfect' but at the end it just felt like a drawing that wasn't even mine. i do like the sky a lot though because painting skies like that have always made me feel really happy.

same situation with this piece. i had the vague idea in my head but it felt like i had to make it a chore to make sure it looked good. i kept trying to find the 'perfect' references and trying to copy tutorials id seen about anatomy to force it to look good but again this just doesn't feel like my art because i think so much of it came from what i thought i shouldve been doing rather than what felt good. it felt like i was trying to prove myself

i did this in an hour and a half and i thought it was going to be a warmup ahkdka. i completely switched off my brain while i did this. i loved this pose from ikari gozen and so i sketched it out really fast in a way that felt so. easy? natural? the rest of the details sort of just fell into place. that's not to say i didnt try to use the same techniques that i did for the other two, but this time i trusted that those techniques that i learned would naturally come to me while i worked while i had the end result in my mind. when i look at this piece i just remember how intuitive the process felt, how i would zoom out of the canvas and look at it and think 'omg wait what if i try that thing i saw on that youtube tutorial...' and how i wasnt trying to prove to myself this was a good drawing, but for the way i felt natural and happy prove it to me instead

this one too ❤️ i have improved my anatomy a lot since this piece but i still use it on all my portfolios and commission examples because it feels like such a good depiction of how i want MY art to feel to me when i see it. i love ladynoir so much and i love oblivio so much and that's genuinely all i was thinking about while drawing this. i didn't want to make it perfect, i just had a vague image of what i wanted it to be like in my head but i was just so excited to be doing oblivio art that i totally forgot about stressing about everything else and just let the brainrot power me HDKDKA. the process was so messy but it felt a lot like solving a puzzle, you know? i didnt need to force any techniques onto it to make it look good because i trusted that the image would already be there, i just needed to find it

[bunny-heels]

i saw your post about not rebloging from people who are proship and if im being honest, that mentality terrifies me as someone who just learned this word. what if there is a new word that circulates in places im not familiar in and i get blacklisted for just rebloging something specific without seeing the entire blog? i really try to stay on top of all this lingo but it gets tough. also is bdsm proship? bdsm is not a cover for abuse even if people try to use it as such, when done responsibly and in the right communities that value safety as a first rule they often are more aware of harm and the reduction and prevention of it then movements that wont allow the depiction of stories that help survivors identify their abuse. am i proship if i appreciate a artful depiction of an abuse in tv that helps me learn how to recover in a healthy way and find skills to help others not get hurt the ways i had to? am i proship for making jokes that might read as hurtful to an outsider who dosnt know my relationship to my friends/partner? im sorry i just want to understand the line here so i can understand the harm these people are actually doing.

i think youre just terrifying yourself, friend.

proshippers only have 3 terms they use, as far as i know; proship, comship [meaning complicated ship], and darkship [meaning dark topic ship].

you won't be blacklisted just because you reblogged a post created by a proshipper, especially if you dont follow the person who created the post and you didnt know they were a proshipper. stuff like that happens all the time, and not just with proshippers. lots of people unknowingly reblog from terfs, racists, nazis, zionists- hell even i've reblogged posts made by people who were like that. but if youre followers actually know who you are, then they'll know it was a mistake, and they'll likely warn you politely about it just to watch out for you.

BDSM is not proship. BDSM has to do with rough and physically tasking acts in sex that are discussed and consented on extensively. lots of people into BDSM, such as subs and doms, will tell you that they regularly check on each other and have a system to let them know if they're okay or need a break or if something goes too far.

plus i myself am into some extreme things that i would never do in real life, let alone without someones consent. its either a 100% yes or there's no doing it all.

liking media with depictions of harmful topics that put it in an educational or meaningful light is also not proship. one of my favorite indie games is My Eyes Deceive, which i find to be a beautifully morbid game that touches well on the topic of abuse towards children and shows how horrific it can really be.

not proship for making jokes either. i'm friends with a chick who we both used to date the same guy who turned out to be a pedo. we often joke about how we were victims of grooming because really, we were.

checkin to see if a person is a proshipper isnt something scary or even that hard to do you'll find. i mean, if you'd make an effort to check if the youtuber youre watching is racist or if the twitter acc youre following is a nazi, then i dont see it as a lot of work to go to a persons blog and double check to make sure they arent a creep.

which btw, you'll know instantly if they are. everyone on this site is not afraid to say what they like or what theyre into. there is a good 90% chance that if the blog youre checking is proship safe, then they will proudly say it on their pinned post or carrd or whatever they use to put their info. its not too hard to spot.

buddy, you have nothing to worry about, and i promise you its not that hard to be a good person. you see someone who has shitty ideals? just block and move on. you didn't know the person you interacted with was shitty? delete it, block them, and move on. like avoiding a food you find gross in a buffet or taking out the trash. you'll be fine.

[anthraxplus]

forgive me for writing so much about tumblr but i have a lot of thoughts

here's the thing about tumblr. i've found it interesting how we continue to call our profiles our "blogs" even though they function differently to the common idea of a blog (like livejournal). but in a way, calling our profiles our blogs makes sense. they're our place to post things we've made or repost content we like. it's more personal than twitter, which has an "information" or "discourse" lens applied to it. the focus on twitter has increasingly been to encourage sharing of information (i.e news or opinions). tumblr's focus has always (afaict) been to encourage sharing of our creations, kinda lumping blogging in there as "self expression" or something to that effect. technically speaking, artists should be more at home on tumblr than on twitter.

but people using their blog as ONLY a blog (no reblogs, just their thoughts or creations - like a livejournal) are in the minority on this site, right? make no mistake, i follow tons of artists who use their blog in a very focused way, but mostly we're all reblogging other people's posts, putting their art on our blogs and riffing in the tags on people's jokes. it is very much a site of Content, Things To Share. the fact that we can blog on here almost feels oddly secondary. but, ok. tumblr is a site for people to post their creations/content, and said content finds an audience through being discovered or reblogged.

so why is it so damn hard to find anything?

like, ok, obviously we can do that. type words into the search bar and you will definitely find posts. but dont you often wonder why the hell some posts showed up in your search and others didnt?

you're telling me filtering searches by top posts of all time isnt showing me the post that has this exact string of text (+- punctuation), but is showing me posts that... have those words in them, scattered, and sometimes not even that exact word ("piss" vs "pissing")?

what about when you try to search for a word or phrase that you KNOW is on a blog in some post, but searching for it brings up NOTHING? i just had to deal with this when searching someone's blog for a specific post i had just seen on my dash - i can only imagine tumblr told me no such post existed because it wasnt tagged with that word.

and all of this feels so obviously wrong, right? even without tags, we should be able to search for words or phrases in a more reliable way on both the site and our blogs. i dont think im alone in the thought that the search function is almost useless - even if it gives me what im looking for sometimes, it can be a struggle, and mostly it just doesnt feel worth it. this is how we can keep ourselves in insular circles and struggle to break out of them. it is literally easier to do this than it is to find new shit.

so, yknow, staff isnt wrong when they say this:

tumblr does need growth, but not necessarily by attracting new users (though, idk, i wouldn't mind that). tumblr needs internal growth. this site is stuck in the early 2010s in a way that is baffling to me, and it has continuously failed to adapt to its userbase's needs in a way that honestly doesnt make sense, and when they do change something, it just ends up causing more strife between staff and users.

so, for example: tumblr needs money to keep functioning, obviously. the common practice is to have ads on the site. but oops, the ads suck and everyone hates them. ok, allow users the option to pay to get rid of ads. but oops, a lot of people dont want to give money to the site that continuously breaks itself (among many other complaints). ok, meet users in the middle and allow them to pay to advertise their stuff - this should be, like, the perfect mix of everything, right? being able to advertise your content on the content site? but oops, this is only a good option because finding new content is so goddamn hard that random people shoving their posts onto your dash is the only remaining viable option. when you have to rely on pure chance/luck for your posts to even be found, even when you do everything in your power to increase their visibility, you're not gonna want to stay here.

i feel like addressing the search function should be the staff's top priority before they implement anything else. we need to be able to find content on the content site. i think thats pretty obvious. once it works the way it already should have, then they can worry about what comes after. i think people feel this animosity with staff because we're struggling to continue to use this site while they struggle to find ways to get money out of us. i think if people felt they could actually use tumblr in the way it intuitively feels like it should be used, that kind of animosity would be more rare*. but until we get that, any change to the site is going to feel wrong.

fwiw though, i'm glad to see staff say that the site basically doesn't work. like. goddamn. took them long enough. i just hope (probably baselessly) that their acknowledgement of this issue will lead to some fixes that benefit the foundational usage of the site.

*yes, there is animosity towards staff for other reasons - like, yknow, how innocuous selfies of trans women get flagged as "mature" (among other things) - but that's an issue of culture/enforcement and not necessarily the raw function of the site, so i feel like it's best suited for a different post

tl:dr PLEASE FIX THE FUCKING SEARCH FUNCTION, IT NEVER SHOULD'VE BEEN ALLOWED TO BE THIS BAD AND I THINK ITS ISSUES HAVE BEEN A MAJOR REASON FOR TUMBLR'S STEADY DECLINE

[butch-bakugo]

Its so interesting how you expect people to treat you. "Publicly apologize and @ me so i can put a disclaimer that i forgave you"?

First off, i used to be a receipts blog for lesbophobia because if you knew anything about me, i used to be a lesbian and i used to be heavily involved in fighting and pushing back at the shit people said about lesbians that wasnt true.

My blog used to be called lesbophobia-reciepts, you can find it if you scroll back like 2 years as i still have asks from me talking to femme-support-group aka dan. Obviously, im still willing to reblog and point out peoples lesbophobia but my blog used to be very centered on that with almost 0 other politic stuff. I was THE lesbophobia reciepts blog(the only other blog of my kind was terfy and dead) where lesbians and lesbian allies could scroll annd block pple for being lesbophobic.

You read one part of my pinned post thats kind of like a ancient artifact of that time that ive never really gotten around to getting rid of. I dont expect apologies from lesbophobic people now but in 2018 and 2019, it was my way of getting people off my reciepts blogs and having the benefit of responding with understanding. I was also only 17-18 yrs old when that happened so dont act like thats my 21 yr old self talking.

Idk you seem pressed and just looking for something to fight me for but yeah, theres your explanation. I made it so people can get their chance to apologize and accept their lesbophobia back when i was just a wee little reciepts blog. Now im just a general politics and opinions blog cause this is the one place i feel totally safe to say any and all my opinions without tumblrinas trying to put my other blogs that arent discourse or opinion centered on a million blocklists so i can make anime edits or post art or wrtie fanfic in peace without people making a fuss and harassing me every 3 months when they realise i dont like pro-shippers.

[oh-for-fic-sake]

The Deal Pt 2

Masterlist

Summary: Clark take you to august to finish the deal.

Warnings: Adult Situations +18, Smut, Dub Con, BDSM, Toys

A/N: second part to @wolfieash​ ask which is here

Taglist: in reblog.

Smut below the cut.

"NO IM NOT GOING ! AND YOU CAN FUCK OFF!" You yelled chasing Clark into the living room arms cross and lips pulled into a snarl.

He rolled his eyes at you, you'd been throwing a fit all day.

"Sweetheart, you made a deal, gave him your word... you cant go back on it" he insisted once more trying to convince you.

"Yes I can it was my word! Not yours, I can do what I want!" You huffed blowing some hair out of your face it was hard trying to be serious when your hair seemed to want to stick in your mouth.

"No poppet I'm not letting you break you word , now get dressed we leave in a hour" he said quickly spinning you around pressing you to the bedroom door.

"Fuck you, I'm not going anywhere!" You grunted pulling away from him.

"Tonight love I promise, now go get ready august is expecting us..." he said grinning almost sweetly at you.

"I don't give a flying fuck! I'm not going" you stomped a foot at him finally making his brow twitch, jaw tightening in irritation.

He stood taller and let his frame seem to devour the space on the hall making you shrink, shivering as you watched your sweet fiancé become a great predator. A loin or bear?

"Sweetheart enough! Now go get dressed...I laid out your outfit" he ground out severely finally having enough. A deal was a deal... and he wanted your ass!

"Out fit? What outfit-OH MY GOD WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!?" You cried entering your room seeing the shear fabric

"That? Its a little body stocking~" Clark said leaning on the door frame arms crossed wearing a huge grin.

"IM NOT WEARING A FUCKING BODYSTOCKING!"

"Well I would if I were you because if not there will be images of your naked ass being flown about on the front pages tomorrow~" he quipped with a smirk.

"Yo-you wouldn't dare!" You said voice loosing its bite as he stared at you.

"Wouldn't I? I mean come on love anal's on the line~" he teased and moved up behind you and slapped your bottom hard enough to make you yip and jerk away.

"Now hop to it... You've got 50 minuets~" he called over his shoulder as he exited the room.

In the end Clarks threat of having you mooney metropolis was too much of a threat and you'd showered and slipped into the body stocking...

But you didn't shave! If they were gonna push through with your whole sex for silence deal then they would live with the consequences! No bare pussy for either of them!

Fuck'em.... or don't? Which was preferable

It wasn't that you didn't enjoy it, it was that you did... a little more then you should have! It frightened you the way you'd enjoyed being used and fought over.

"Oh come on why the long face angel?" August hummed as he opened the glass doors on his rooftop home, the penthouse was shiny sleek and as dark as the man himself.

"Fuck off august!" you grumbled walking right passed him as soon as Clark put you down

"Oh such a foul mouth! We will have to teach you some manners~" the agent quipped as you entered the bare but masculine space, everything was harsh lines and fucked up art pieces of splotching blocky shades of black, red and deep violet.

"Yes she's very snippy today... has been all week, pouting" Clark huffed shrugging. Taking the offered crystal glass with amber liquid.

"Ah we have a brat on our hands then?" August chuckled and walked through the home quickly snagging one of your elbows and directed you to the playroom, not wasting any time.

"Yeah, she doesn't want me to fuck her ass" Clark summarized with a shrug.

"Aww Why not sweety? You loved me fucking your ass? You cried and withered moaning so beautifully~" august hummed into your ear as he pressed you over the threshold into a large windowless room, strip lighting igniting the room in a light red. The devils den so to speak.

"Sh-shut up you prick" you snarled.

Augusts reply was a tsk and he pressed you over to a padded sawhorse and looked to Clark nodding to the ankle and wrist cuffs.

Clark breezed past him quickly securing you down making you curse him, but by this point it was a formality as you had already soaked yourself through.

"Oh would you look at that? Our little brat is eager~" august said with a chuckle and a warm hand probed you lightly making you jolt and try to squirm away.

"Yes I know, she likes denying herself, its strange she knows we will win but Continues to fight?" He said coming around your side ghosting his fingers over your ribs making you shudder.

"Well lets not waste time shall we? I have a few things out ready but first lets get this fitted shall we?" August said menacingly walking around you brandishing a very large O ring gag.

"After all if she's going to throw a tantrum I don't trust her not to bite" he uttered moving towards you.

"I've never thought of using one of those before... it wont hurt her will it?"

"Only her pride Clark trust me even she needs a... dressing down every once in a while" august reassured him.

Your eyes grew wide as the agent approached with the large gag that looked both threatening and enticing, things had been kinky with august but you hadn't ever gone this far into bdsm before. You were scared and still fighting but not as hard? You were curious and being dominated by them last week had... changed you. It had been thrilling to be so out of control.

"Should we... give her a signal or something? Incase it gets to much?" Clark quizzed, he was still all for it but wanted to be mindful of you. He didn't want to hurt you.

"Trust me she's going to love it, but in the case of something going wrong" august directed his attention to you befo4e continuing.

"There is a small desk bell one the inside of the left leg on the saw horse... if thing get too much hit it three times fast and we will get you down" he said seriously.

You frowned as his gaze bored into you, for a second you believed you saw actual concern in his eyes.

It unsettled you, August couldn't really have any feelings towards you could he? I mean this was blackmail!

You nodded quickly to him letting him know you understood.

Then just like that August was haughty again and quickly fixed the gag in your mouth, setting your teeth in the small grooves that was semi comfortable.

"Shes ready when you are~" the agent hummed and stood back.

Clark darted behind you and helped himself to you and august disappeared from sight.

You moaned into the room as your fiancé roamed your folds as if exploring them for the first time.

He was rougher then usual prodding and impaling you fast and hard before slowing and drawing your own arousal over your presented ass.

You withered as Clark used you body, pressing you higher and higher making you teeter on then edge then back away letting you calm down only to work you up again.

"I thought we could... try something... a little bonus for all of us tonight~" you heard august but couldn't see him.

"I'm listening" Clark said as he plunged his fingers back into you harder throwing off your concentration making you cry out.

"I have this" you tried seeing what August had but was too preoccupied with the maddening strokes of clark's fingers as he pounded away at your g-spot forcing you to try and rock on him chasing a high he had already cruely denied you twice.

"What even is that thing?" Cark said not paying attention to you as your body twisted and pulled trying to cum like a desperate whore.

"Here ill show you~" august said and Clarks fingers disappeared from you making you cry out and moan, your pussy tried holding him but it was to drenched to actually grip him.

Then something was pressed into you, large wide and very short.

"Oh-oh fuck?!AH!" You yelped  awkwardly around the gag as the toy settled, curved forward and down pressing on your gspot without being held. There was a large flat expanse resting outside of you to, the toy curved in a large C shape.

"Does that go up her?"

"No no, we just pop her little clit in here~ and press the button!" You jerked as august moved you, thick fingers prodding your clit and sat the engorged nub into a small round dip and pressed a button.

You squealed tensing all at once as you felt a suction on your clit and roared.

"Holy shit?" Clark said in awe watching as you keened and tried throwing you weight around on the toy that was held in place by your muscles clenching to it so tightly... It was bittersweet in a way, your own body holding the sweet torturous device on your clit.

"And it gets better, press that one" you hear a small click and arched moaning out as the egg like shape inside of you came to life vibrating against your insides.

Clark watched entranced as you withered this is what he'd been missing out on? Fuck!

August darted around you and strokes you hair watching as Clark stripped behind you unable to wait any longer as you thrashed about trying to rock into the toy.

"Shh shh thats a girl, now deep breath your wonderboy may be a little too enthusiastic if your doing all that squirming~"

You froze feeling Clark poise himself at your well lubed ass then grunted as he thrust forward splitting you open.

Clark hissed and moaned loudly as the vibrating egg not only made you quiver and tense around him already threatening to flood the place but it also rubbed his cock as he rutted you.

"Oh fuck- thats amazing! I cant- I shit babe!?" Clark didn't wait he immediately began pounding in to the tight quivering body before him.

August chuckled once more before releasing his own belt buckle. Not wanting to let your wails and monas go to waste.

They would work wonders on his cock, offering the sweetest of releases as you screamed onto his cock as he lodged it into your throat.

August was never into men, but he could develop a thing for corrupting this huge perfect man.

For now August would let you and Clark think you were in control of the deal. Let this one final night play out.

But the seed was sewn and before long he knew Superman would return wanting to explore more and more of this little sex dungeon. And then he will strike another deal.

Because August wasn't opposed to making a little compromise to get decent pussy. If he had to share with Supes so be it, it looked like he could teach the kid a thing or two and he would gladly, because he had many more toys to tease you both with~

If things went to plan he'd have not one but two desperate little subs. And he couldn't wait!

[everyhowlmarksthedead]

no kisses needed.

© @sonsofeorl

JOHNNY ‘COCO’ CRUZ.

MAYANS MC ┃ USEFUL LINKS

❝ request by @blowmymbackout: reader has a co-worker who just won't take the hint that reader isn't interested and has a bf she tells Coco he picks her up from work confronts the man. Coco is a lil jealous. Co-worker facetimes reader while coco has her in this position (sorry if that didn't make any sense)

❝ words: about 1.2k.

❝ warnings: nsfw, unprotected sex, language, voyeurism (????), coco being a little possessive, mention of bodily fluids.

❝ a / n: as always, don’t forget to comment and reblog if you liked it!

You weren't expecting Coco to pick you up from work today, but you guess he has just done it to see who's the fucker trying to flirt with his girl. The guy is uglier than the back of a fridge, and he feels some comfort in it. But not enough to calm down his jealousy. He —better than anybody— knows that you don't care about a pretty face, you care about a beautiful heart, tho. His insecurities come afloat on your way back home, worrying you because he's more silent than ever, not even getting a response when you whisper in his ear how much you have missed him today after waking up alone.

Coming into your house with his face down, Coco leaves his kutte and both helmets on the coffee table, a second before falling onto your sofa. A leg over it, the other flexed to the floor. Your boyfriend looks at you, thoughtful and very concentrated on the way you have to remove your jacket and walk towards his position. You know exactly what's on his mind and that touches your soul. His demons eat him alive with no mercy. Kneeling a leg between his —placing your phone close to his black helmet—, you lean down with both hands on his chest for balance, landing your lips onto his left ear.

“Can you do something for me?” You hum with such a sweet tone, caressing his cheek with the tip of your nose. And you hear him swallowing slowly. “Fuck me, Coco. I need you so fuckin' much… You can't imagine… Can you do that for me, ah? Can you fuck me so hard I forgot my name but not who I belong to?”

He utters a feral snarl, noticing then that your right hand has made its way to his dick. You grip it over the rough fabric, swinging it with a tortuous pace, fixing your eyes on his. Coco is about to kiss you when you push him down using your left hand.

“I don't want your kisses now”. You whisper accommodating yourself over the delicious rock under his clothes. “I want your dick. I want you to fuck me till I have to beg you to stop”.

How does he manage to roll you down his body? You don't know. But the fact is that, in less than a second, you're lying on your stomach and your boyfriend is removing your sneakers and your jeans. He can't help but lick his lips keenly as he glances at the small spot darkening your panties, the evidence of how wet you are because of him.

“Fuck, ma'...”

Coco rips off the piece of clothing causing you to gasp, while you take off the shirt covering your torso, only leaving the blue bra you're wearing beneath it. He undoes it to throw it to the floor too, sliding an arm under your stomach to make you raise your ass. With his free hand, your boyfriend pulls down his jeans and boxers enough to let his hard cock spring free. He doesn't prepare you. Coco guides his glans to your folds to slam his thick length into your soaked cunt. You moan loud and clear his full name, as he settles his body between your spread legs.

Digging his fingers in your hips, aware that he probably will leave some marks there, he doesn't show any mercy. He hits your guts and your soul once and once with an insane pace that causes you to roll your eyes, nailing your hands on the armrest to find some equilibrium and receive every pound straight to your g-spot without falling over it. Coco is fucking you as hard as you have asked him, blanking your mind and making a mess of your vocals.

And he doesn't stop when your phone starts to ring. The name of your co-worker appearing on the screen. Your boyfriend has the brilliant idea of pulling your hair back by tangling his digits there, bringing his lips to your ear. His other hand grabs your device to put it at the height of your faces, sliding his thumb to answer the video call.

The first thing your partner can see is the pleasure gesture on yours, moaning and screaming Coco's name, not having noticed yet what he is doing until you hear your co-worker calling you.

“Tell him how good I fuck you, ma'”. Your boyfriend demands with such a throaty growl, thrusting his thick and hard length into you, impaling your body against the sofa.

“Shit…” You almost cry. “He fucks me so damn good”.

“That's it… Tell him… Tell him who you belong to”.

You know that he's enjoying it, but you can't answer when your partner hangs up the call. Coco can't help but laugh, tosing your phone to the table, to occupy his hand in a better place. Wrapping it around your throat, your boyfriend forces you to kneel on the cushions, sticking his chest to your back.

“Bet he won't forget”. He grunts into your ear, tilting your head to tuck his tongue within your mouth.

He drinks your pleas, your begs, your gaps, placing your fingers around his wrists, aware that you're not going to last much more because of what has just happened. And he feels it. He feels how your whole anatomy gets tensed with every push to your guts, creating an erotic melody of flesh against flesh. Pulling you down again and gripping your hips, Coco increases the pace of his lungs, giving you more pleasure than you can bear with, still enraged because of that shithead thinking he could have some kind of opportunity with you. You are his. Like your heart, your soul, your thoughts.

“Ah, fuck, baby”. You paint roaring, biting your lips until the metallic taste of blood floods your mouth.

The tickles in your lower belly grow by leaps and bounds, making your heart stop for a brief instant before the orgasm blows out all your senses and the electrical lash roams your back. It takes Coco only two slams more into your soaked pussy to cum inside you, filling you as much as he can press his body against yours. He doesn't feel jealous, nor angry anymore. He simply is too tired after that rough quickly, marking your skin wherever his teeth have reached it.

Loosening his grip bit by bit to pull his wet dick out from you, your boyfriend holds your phone again to take a picture of his warm seed spilling out from your abused lips. A piece of art under his dark eyes. Lying on your back and placing a smooth kiss on top of your head, he shows you the little mess he has done with a proud smile crossing his exhausted mouth.

“Was tha' what you wanted?”

“Uh-huh”. You whisper resting your cheek over your forearms, turning slightly at him. “Did you have fun, Coquito?”

“I always have fun ruining your sweet tight pussy, ma'. I don' even mind if that cabrón wanna come and look the next time”.

GENERAL TAG LIST: @mayans-sauce @peoniarose @destynelseclipsa @band-psycho @myakai13 @petlaufeyson @-im-fantastic- @horsesandwolvesaremyanimals @rocketqueen @rosieposie0624 @ellyseveronica @Jessprins13 @diaryofkali @ravenmoore14 @starrynite7114 @kenbechillin @miahelen @monkeyluver4546 @sheeshgivemeabreak @jadesamhart @rawrlittlepanda-95 @megapeacelovemusic-blog @katsav17 @skits90s @wildsould1221 @littlekittymeow @tenderclio @badame1240 @regalbanshee

MAYANS MC: @multiyfandomgirl40 @countryash345 @skyofficialxx @lovebennycolonmiguelgalindo @bellisperennis0 @chibsytelford @trulysuccubus @purrrrfect @witching-hour @leathercladmenfics @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead @queenbeered @sesamepancakes @gemini0410 @pinguinstudiert @oscars-wifeyyy @meteora-fc @lozaa94 @arveeee @joupym @hanster1998 @missswritings @arana-alpha @lucillewinchester @theocatkov @telfordlowmans

[women-loving]

do you have any advice for overcoming internalised biphobia? i... thought i was a lesbian for a long time but turns out im not purely gay. im bi... its like 90/10 ratio (90 being for women obviously) but still... its kindof... disheartening somewhat... for some reason i feel... less... proud about it... do you have any advice for getting over this? thank you

First of all I’m sorry it took me so long to answer this ask. I made a recent post about my absence from this blog, which will explain what took me so long. Maybe you don’t need my words anymore. Maybe you’re in a better place by now. I hope so.

But I’ve still thought about you a lot. And I’m still going to write you something, even if you maybe do not need it any more. Maybe circumstances have long changed. You can skip reading all of this if you don’t need it. Maybe there’s another woman like you who will want to read this.

I'm publishing this, encouraging any followers interested in offering their own advice to reblog and add anything they might have to say.

I'll just... say a lot of words, and you take what seems useful to you! It would be ridiculous to expect all advice to apply to every specific person. I hope something I say is helpful, and if it isn't, you can at least take heart knowing a bi women out there is thinking about you, wishing you well, put quite a bit of thought into trying to help you. I hope that at least offers you some comfort.

One option here is considering the root cause of your feelings and trying to address that. "For some reason" implies to me that you don't know why you're unhappy with being bisexual. And honestly, it is okay if you can't self-examine to a point where you know the root cause of your feelings. Too much self examination drags a person down. You don't need to know anything. You can live happily without having a deep understanding of yourself.

But maybe you do want to think about it a little and try to figure out why you feel unhappy.

I know for me, I feel can feel unhappy with my attraction to men because 1. they icky and 2. they treat women so poorly a lot of the time. Please note that extremely simplifies the issue, lol. Simple words for something big and complex.

And my personal solution to those two issues is to say "hey, who cares though? Just because I'm attracted to men doesn't mean I need to be romantically involved with them." And so the fact men are icky isn’t super relevant to me any more. I don't have to deal with their ickiness. I don't have to make them part of my life. I personally won't be treated poorly by a man in a romantic relationship because I won't be having a romantic relationship with a man.

Bisexual is who you are, yes. But how you live your life is in your control. You're not going to undergo some huge transformation... You're still wonderful, creative and imaginative you, and you can live however you like.

I snooped your blog a bit to get to know you a little better, and I see you are a writer. Oh, how wonderful to be bisexual and to be a writer. I'm sure the lack of seeing experiences like your's is hard, but you can write how you feel, you can create your own stories about bisexual women. When you're a writer, everything in life becomes something you can use for your stories. Even if you can't bring yourself to write now, if it hurts too much, you can use it. I'm a writer too, and I like to use some of my past painful experiences for inspiration.

Your passion can be your gift, and you can use it to get through so many difficult things. Us bisexuals who prefer women don't see ourselves reflected in a lot of art and writing. But we can make stories and prose that resonates with other women like us. If you wanted to, you could do something that really touches other women like you.

I have to admit, I myself am a bit of a coward in this regard. Sharing art online is scary! I'm sorry ladies!

If you do write anything about your bisexuality, I am begging you to let me know so I can reblog it. I want to read it! And I know it would mean so much to so many other women.

Maybe your displeasure with your sexuality comes from that, not seeing yourself in art. It's a lot easier to find stuff for lesbians then it is to find things for bi women who don't want to engage with men. But what we don't see, we can use our creative energy to make.

Another thing I want to touch on is the immense stress and anxiety so many women have with our sexuality.... I think to some level, there is too much fixation on it. I know I sound weird when I say that, I run a blog about bisexuality. But it's just a little piece of yourself, and you don't need to make it overtake everything about your life. Trying to let go of the stress can be a good idea.

Looking into mindfulness techniques, and learning how to feel an emotion and then release it instead of ruminating on it has been helpful to me personally.

Finally, maybe this is just me, but being bisexual does sincerely feel great and powerful. I feel like I can admire pretty people of all sorts. There aren’t nearly as many gorgeous men as there are women, but I can appreciate what they look like. I love being capable of loving any sex, and then making my own choice about who the best person is for me.

A lot of the women in their life, they seem to be oddly... helpless, to their sexuality. They have to have someone, they have to tolerate a terrible man because they’re attracted to him.... There is no “have to” though. We’re not confined to what our attraction says. We can all always choose the best person for us. We can also choose ourselves. We can focus on doing what we like without worrying about other people.

I really do feel like being bisexual is awesome... It can be hard for me to relate to true hatred of one’s bisexuality. I urge followers who have struggled with to share what helped them. For me, my sexuality has always been something I loved. I love being able to find anyone attractive, admiring all their best traits from afar, while dating the perfect person for me. Her and only her.

Even before I met finally met her, I was so happy to stay single and wait for her. Focus on bettering myself and my own life, and assuring that I have the best version of myself to offer her.

Well, that's all I can think of for now! I gave myself some time to think this over, so hopefully something in there is helpful. And if not, I hope maybe one of my followers might have some advice for you.

Good luck! Thank you for having the strength to reach out to someone. I truly do wish you well, and I hope any woman who is struggling with this and is reading this right now will one day feel better too.

[macncheesenketchup]

by the way

why does every disorder or disability have a canon vs fanon

and why are they always so overinflated

its like

fanon autism: wow im so smart but i cant talk to people but im a math genius. i can hear like a bat but i have no friends :( i wish there was a cure for autism, my DISEASE... all i do is annoy my friends but trust me im endearing... because im useful! canon autism: i was late to school/work today because i put on a shirt but it had a kind of weird tag so i tore through five shirts before finding one without it, then i made breakfast before remembering i hate the texture of eggs, so now these are going to go to waste, but if I throw this away I’ll die, but I can’t physically eat it, so I guess I’ll save it in the fridge forever, but when I got out the door I noticed it was too cold for me to be okay out here, so i went inside to get my jacket, but it was really heavy and the texture hurt so i took it off in the car then put it back on after i got out of the car then didn’t wear it rest of the day fanon adhd: im so quirky and fun, i love doing quirky things like theatre and history :) i sometimes wanna impulsively do things like talk a lot :0.... im not like other girls!!!! canon adhd: my intrusive thoughts make me want to shit on tables jump on things and cry ALL THE TIME but thats okay because i have work to hyperfixate on now if only i can oh no my brain said no. but i really have to so i guess ill try to power through it-- oh no i zoned out all day i guess ill just pick it up tomorrow. i had medicine to take this morning right? dang it i guess i forgot. oh no i also forgot my jacket, backpack, art, phone, and medicine all in different places. I looked for all of these things and found the remote I lost last year but not these things. guess I’ll give up and take my sleeping drugs. oh no my sleeping drugs didn’t work I didn’t sleep all night. guess I’ll pace around the house-- oh THERE’S my things! all in the same room? what?

there are so many more examples its actually wild reblog with your personal examples of canon versus fanon

[pacificovertures]

I posted 2,110 times in 2021

1142 posts created (54%)

968 posts reblogged (46%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 0.8 posts.

I added 1,220 tags in 2021

#pointless rambling - 666 posts

#asks - 167 posts

#i am looking - 74 posts

#relations - 68 posts

#bird music - 58 posts

#bird reads - 45 posts

#im@sposting - 37 posts

#my art - 37 posts

#aesthetic - 36 posts

#reference - 32 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#i wish i could say something more eloquently about this but if you ever want to hear a multi paragraph rant on how the public school system

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

the number one best thing about the in the heights movie is that daphne rubin-vega is now being recognized for the queen she is

52 notes • Posted 2021-06-14 18:57:34 GMT

#4

ok but what if i said– *is shot dead*

85 notes • Posted 2021-03-19 16:04:59 GMT

#3

serious post time. this is something i’ve been trying to put into words for a while, as someone who is an intensely passionate fan of fashion history while also being a person of color. as has already been widely discussed, when we talk about “fashion history” that’s usually in regards to what a western-world-centric view of what fashion is and has been. that’s a very important thing to be discussed, but what i want to talk about is something more individual.

i’d like to preface this with the disclaimer that this post is not intended as an argument, as i am not trying to attack any position or make any substantial claims. rather i am trying to parse through a personal struggle by sharing it with others who may relate or sympathize. if i offend anyone on accident, i’m sorry that really was not the intention.

particularly how as an east asian person, i interact with western history and historical media. what i’ve tended to notice is that there is reasonable belief of most non-asian people’s existence within historical space, even if the roles of people of color in historical narratives are dominated by a white majority. the interconnection between europe, africa, and the americas through colonization is undeniable, and therefore the history is connected as well.

this isn’t to say that those places are not historically connected to asia at all, rather that the east (regarding all of asia and the pacific islands) exists in this permanently exoticized, othered space within the western psyche. orientalism is also an important point of discussion, but i’ll save that for a different rainy day.

what i’m trying to convey is that, for example, a person like myself could not appear in a traditional western historical re-enactment without breaking some kind of suspension of disbelief that would not exist for a black or latino actor.

one note: asian people do have considerable place interacting with western culture throughout history but due to erasure, ignorance, and status as perpetual foreigners, do not have as strong a presence as other minorities.

i guess the question then becomes, “why care so much about the west? the east has a very rich fashion history of its own!” which is very, very true! one can easily be stunned by the traditional garments of aapi cultures. as a chinese person, i think it’s pretty neat that hanfu is seeing a bit of a popular revival. but at the same time it’s a partial desire to have a seat at the table (being taken seriously in western circles?) and a partial personal disconnect with chinese culture (as an adoptee raised by white parents).

it’s probably just a shallow thing, like, “who says everything has to be neurotically accurate? i should be able to study and wear what i want?” but it has been on my mind chronically since i picked up the special interest. i don’t want to feel like i’m ashamed of or giving up on “my heritage” or whatever but i don’t want to be limited by the race i was born into. there’s the conundrum.

so whether it’s my child self wishing they were white so they could be pretty or me currently feeling guilty for having an interest in something, the conflict remains.

90 notes • Posted 2021-06-24 03:35:42 GMT

#2

i think this is poetry

105 notes • Posted 2021-01-03 03:12:08 GMT

#1

(Pingat Dress, France, 1891-1893)

164 notes • Posted 2021-01-31 01:10:09 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[freebooter4ever]

i’ve seen the discussion going back and forth on boundaries and sexual objectification, and i don’t have much to add to the conversation other than to say everyone is allowed to determine their OWN ‘lines’ and just because we don’t vocalize them doesn’t make them any less valid. but here’s the limits i set for my blog if anyone feels it is important for them to know (<3):

personally I consider ‘characters’ fair game for anything goes, with ‘public personas’ a little more iffy. ‘RPF’ isn’t new - it just takes on a new more accessible/visible form nowadays. i remember reading my first fic about a ‘real person’ back in my LOTR fandom days - it was a story in first person perspective about the main character meeting orlando bloom on a plane before he was ‘famous’. like a lot of these types of stories, it wasnt so much about the person as it was about the meet cute. the actor was just a convenient placeholder with a handsome face and some personality quirks thrown in to make the romance/dialogue more specific. i personally dont read much xReader fic nowadays, but mostly only cause i’m an old fart who can’t relate to the ‘you’ format. i miss the good old days when people actually created OC’s and then inserted them into things LOL. but also LOL if you think i’ve gone an entire year of quarantine without some imagined personal fantasies of joe mazzello (or steve aoki in the years before)(ramilicious can attest to this. she can also attest to most of these fantasies ending in friendship rather than anything explicit cause that’s just how i roll these days lol). the line i draw is i would never post these types of fics in a place where the subject could accidentally find them - you have to go looking for this stuff on tumblr, most fics are given explicit ratings and under read-mores. with the blacklist tags it’s pretty easy to filter things out. its even easier to add filters to ao3 searches. i am NOT going to do something like message steve aoki and say ‘yeah i watched that movie Ibiza like five times, here is my 1k fic where you’re the dj and i’m the one night stand’. but obviously people still enjoy imagining scenarios like these otherwise movies like Ibiza wouldn’t exist?

for art, i consider anything already on display up for grabs, we all know a certain person’s ass is all over the place...all you have to do is google ‘need for speed’ and rami’s name. HOWEVER, in the case of actors i personally would not draw anything more explicit than what’s already there. i’m not gonna draw full frontal nudity for rami (unless he gifts us with it in a movie, i suppose) or anyone. this is 100% a personal choice for me. 

i was a sophomore or junior in college when i volunteered as a figure drawing monitor where i’d time the nude model’s poses and help them set up the stage and lighting and such. there was this one guy in his mid forties probably, a regular who came every week, and i always thought of him fondly till one day (the day after i ran into my Hot Programming TA during dinner and later sent him an email begging him to go on a date with me because i was desperate for kissing experience)(and Hot Programming TA emailed me back within minutes saying yes) this artist guy who i saw all the time and thought i knew fairly well, decided to draw me instead of the model. which would have been fine except he drew me naked. i was NOT naked at the time, i was wearing a shirt, and a bra, and a full prairie skirt with alternating calico and floral patterns. he drew what he imagined was underneath all that. he came up to me after the figure drawing session and showed me his drawings and told me i had been ‘glowing’ and my response was to laugh it off awkwardly and get the hell out of there as soon as i gave the model their pay check. but inwardly i was thinking a) i was NOT glowing for this creepy man twice my age and b) i did NOT give him consent to sexualize my body under my clothes and then SHOW me that objectification. i never said anything to him or anything else, i continued to be the monitor, and i continued to field off creepy advances from him including multiple job offers, but when i finally realized i could just...stop..and i passed the student volunteer monitor job on to my friend naeem, i also realized that what that older male artist did was NOT ok in my book. and it was probably not something he would do while naeem was monitoring.

nowadays im working in an industry that regularly objectifies female bodies. in the past year alone i have had to deal with requests to make breasts bigger, i have been given character rigs that in addition to the usual elbow, knee, and spine joints also have ‘nipple’ joints but ONLY for the women (to make them jiggle for animation), every time i send out a female pose i get it back with notes that push it further into the sexy type of body language reserved for women (twist the spine more! sway the back more! give it ‘energy!’), i have been told to erase wrinkles and fat and pores but ONLY for the women (men you ADD pores bc realism! and manliness!) and this is all me working for a company that is actually fairly progressive in terms of sexism compared to OTHER studios.

like it or not, sexual objectification is a huge part of specifically women’s lives and how we react to that is our business. for me, turning the tables and putting men on display feels like fair’s fair. i cant stop the men from doing it, so if i want to enjoy sexualizing male bodies, damn it im gonna! like dang it, boy do i want to send steve aoki a thank you note every time he posts a video of himself doing those ice baths during the sunset golden hour bc holy shit gorgeous or working out in his gym wearing VERY little clothes, but i dont because i know what its like when someone imposes their personal fantasies on the subject. or, god, there was that time i had to unfollow nicole’s insta for a while bc i had a very explicit dream about her and realized, shit, i need to take a break and get my emotions under control before i can refollow. and god some of the stuff i see dudes sending her during her live videos on mental illness/meditation is TOTALLY gross and not something they should be confronting her with. and she’s not even ‘famous’ famous. or how some fans send their idols explicit direct messages without consent. THAT feels inappropriate to me.

a part of me feels like i shouldn’t have to defend this. men don’t. they’re even encouraged in mass media to sexualize women. but i also recognize the importance of talking about consent. the importance of recognizing that a celebrity deserves to have their boundaries respected. these are my lines in fandom. other people have different lines they won’t cross, and that’s okay to me. i block or blacklist any blogs or tags i think go over the top.

heck, even in fandom-only spaces i still try to keep my own more sexual fantasies off this blog and only in private messages with my friends and mutuals, and i feel like that might come across as unintentionally prudish or judgmental sometimes. i’m not ‘horny on main’ very often. but like...every time i reblog that particular ‘washing machine’ gif of joe mazzello am i thinking about him naked and thinking about how he’s got very loooooong feet, and ‘gee i wonder if that means /other/ things are Too Big for my tastes’ but also ‘gosh wouldnt that make a pretty picture to draw’???? hell yeah.

i dont know who is gonna actually read this essay but yolo i guess :)

[shinsoups]

‘get to know me’ tag game

Rules: answer the questions and tag people you’d like to get to know better.

tagged by: @tangerinefluff​ @brazil-hinata​ @chibishae34​ and @saving-empress-ac​  i dont have a lot to tag anymore haha since 4 of you tagged me to this already! thank you so much 🥰✨

tagging: @b0ku4ka @doodleniella​ @eilime910​ @gayerthanthee​ @tsukeijii​ @vicassa​ @kagebunshiin​ (pls feel free to ignore this if ur not comfortable sharing info about yourself) ✨

What do you prefer to be called name-wise? Sey 

When is your birthday? december 9

Where do you live? philippines

Three things you are doing right now:

finishing a draft report

while listening to some lofi/jazz ghibli playlist

drinking coffee at the moment

Four fandoms that have piqued your interest?

pjo (2013 i think i binge read my friends collection! i got pulled into it)

bts (2015-present)

day6 (2017-present)

haikyuu and bnha (2017 up to present) 

How has the pandemic been treating you? its tiring to not know what day it is and to think its already december i feel like i wasted 9 months without doing something at all :(

A song you can’t stop listening to right now? Love Me Less by MAX How old are you? 20+ 

School, university, occupation, other? university and working? as a volunteer at the moment near our place. i help organize modules for less fortunate kids who weren’t able to enroll this school year. so i help make said modules and teach parents so can they teach their kids.

Do you prefer heat or cold? cold. im not really good when its too hot, i feel suffocated and sweaty 

Name one fact others may not know about you. i like to write and draw? actually i try to do that haha my friends are not aware how i write for fandoms and actually own a tumblr account like this \

Are you shy? yes. i usually don’t talk a lot. i just like to listen to others and tbh i’ll only speak once im asked or if needed lmao

Pronouns? she/her

Biggest pet peeves? people who chew with their mouths open, the so-called Filipino time pff

What is your favorite “dere” type? dandere? or maybe tsundere

Rate your life from 1-10, 1 being crappy and 10 being the best it could be. probably just a 5. i tend to live my life just for the sake of living haha i dont put that much pressure on myself. a friend told me if im following a dudeist kind of life. i dont even know myself anymore haha

What’s your main blog? howcanisey (its a day6,skz,bts, got7 blog) i started posting on main after deactivating my amino account sksks

List your side blogs and what they’re used for

heyheysey  - feels like this is main already haha this was originally a haikyuu!! love blog but since i love so many anime, manga and manhua this became a messy blog already. i also post fics and art? here

musubimsby - i made this so i can reblog all the fics i like and read (to be read fics as well) which some are +18 or nsfw content 

Is there something people need to know about you before becoming friends? as long as people know how to respect everybody then im good, they’re good. also pls do know i dont talk a lot. really, whenever i talk in tags its just me doing monologue lmao i dont bite but i tend to forget to reply in conversations most of the times. im not ignoring you...there’s just a high chance my attention span has been limited to 3 seconds once again.

[ask-de-writer]

SEA DRAGON’S GIFT : Part 83 of 83 : World of Sea

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SEA DRAGON’S GIFT

Part 83 of 83

by

De Writer (Glen Ten-Eyck)

140406 words

copyright 2020

written 2007

All rights reserved.

Reproduction in any form, physical, electronic or digital is prohibited without the express consent of the author.

//////////////

Copyright fair use rules for Tumblr users

Users   of Tumblr.com are specifically granted the following rights.  They may   reblog the story provided that all author and copyright information   remains intact.  They may use the characters or original characters in   my settings for fan fiction, fan art works, cosplay, or fan musical   compositions.

All sorts of fan art, cosplay, music or fiction is actively encouraged.

///////////////////////

New to the story?  Read from the beginning.  PART 1 is here

///////////////////////

“Why, one,” said Master Juris, bothered now by where the questions might lead.  Master Clard and the others all followed in a ragged chorus, “One.”

“Could you all hear the drum talk between the ships?”  Kurin had hands on hips now, and determination in her tone.

Again the chorus of yeses sounded.

“So, you knew that Mister Kotance was attempting to seize my  personal property on the pretext that I was only a child as Master Juris just tried to claim as well?  That he was trying to take a ship and murder people that you all knew very well were seeking redress of wrongs done to them by the fleet?  Then you just stood by and let at least a quarter of the crew risk Scattering for participation in piracy?  It wasn’t until Mord Halyn, whom I still regard as my Captain, tried to deal with the results of the piracy’s failure that you, your apprentices and journeymen finally emerged in spite of the guards and took over, as you should have done at once.

“Now you throw in our faces the attempt to save you from the results of your own folly?”  Kurin finished severely, “Take the Wergeld offer.  Save your ship.  Or take the Fleet Law and lose it.”

While the Longin’s abashed officers and Masters conferred, Kurin turned to Tanlin.  “Thanks for that hug.  I really needed it.”

“Oi know,” she replied.  “Ye needed ‘Igh Cloud too.”

Softly, Kurin asked, “Lady — Captain Tanlin, can you take something from me?”

“I’ tis w’at Oi suspect tis, nae.  Nae now,” Tanlin answered equally softly.  “Just now, we’re tryin’ t’ save t’em, nae drive t’em onto a reef — in a storm — wit’ a Dragon-tide t’ ‘elp t’ings along.”

The Longin’s conference was brief.  It was Master Clard who spoke for them.  In a clear voice he said formally, “Your Honors, Kurin, the Longin wishes to formally apologize to you all, and you, Kurin, especially.  Master Juris spoke from passion, not thought.  He was angry and let his feelings get the better of him.

“For the rest, a majority of us have decided to hear out the Wergeld idea. If we do not, it would appear that we are dismasted and sinking with no help in sight.  Make your offer.”

Kurin stood up, relief clear on her countenance.  “The first part of the agreement is common to all Wergeld agreements.  It is simply the rules of the Wergeld.  You must acknowledge the wrongs in dispute and publicly agree to the settlement that we bargain out.  The settlement will have the force of fleet Law once reached.  It is between us alone.  It may not be used as a precedent or in any future criminal or civil action not directly related to the terms of this understanding.  Things said or admitted in this Wergeld may not be used against either of us in future legal action, civil or criminal. Any future charges brought must stand on their own merits and may not derive from this agreement.  Last, all grudges and feuds between the parties of this Wergeld must be put aside or the whole thing is voided and the Law will take its proper course.

“The wrongs in question have been listed already.  They are not disputable.  All else is subject to negotiation.

“The first term of the offer is this.  Mister Kotance has already been separately charged.  No term of this Wergeld shall be in any way binding on him.

“For our part, we have Mister Morgu and Silor who will have to be tried before the fleet for their mutiny, attempted murder and murder.  This whole sad mess began and was caused by their hate.  They also shall have no protection in this Wergeld.

“Can you agree with us so far?” asked Kurin hopefully.

Alor, the Longin’s Purser and legal officer, asked Captain Sarfin, “Before we say anything, will the Naral fleet agree to this — Wergeld thing?”

Sarfin steepled his hands, thought for a moment, and then conferred with Sula.  He nodded and Sula spoke for the bench.  “As one of the parties involved is Arrakan and we are not in Naral fleet waters, Arrakan Law and Custom may be properly invoked.  The Third Great Law gives the Naral fleet no choice in the matter.  They must enforce the Wergeld as agreed between you.”

“Then we can agree, so far, Kurin.”  She tilted her head in sad puzzlement at one change that she had heard.  “Us?  We? Our? Kurin?  Will you still leave us?  What good will this do if we cannot have the school and the mapping contract?”

“Don’t be afraid, Alor,” Kurin reassured her.  “I won’t abandon you to be Scattered.  Some things do have to change, though.”

She turned and asked, “Barad, will you present the next term?”

He stood and smiled in a twisted sort of way.  “I never thought to be in this position.  Mord Halyn Longin, I have to apologize to you in particular.  That I tried to stop the mutiny is no excuse for starting the plot in the first place.  I was wrong.  I am sure that my error brought you onto dry land for a time.  I am also sure that you now have safe water under your keel.  The term is this.  The fleet must restore your Master’s Certificate and replace you at the helm of the Longin.  They need you.  If you don’t think so, just look at how quickly and to what extent they went out the scuppers without you.  

“Besides, you were a guest at our Announcement Feast, so my old feud with you is dead or I lose my wife.  Can you agree to this?”  He held out his hand toward Mord, who appeared to be looking for some hook in what he had heard.  At last, prodded by Alor, he shook Barad’s hand in agreement.  He appeared to be disturbed that he owed his restoration, ship and freedom to Barad whom he had always thought of (correctly) as an enemy.

Tanlin stood and raised hands for attention.  “As Ca’tain o’ t’e Grandalor, Oi ‘ave t’ bring t’e next part o’ t’e Wergeld. By t’e terms, Oi can bring up yer violation o’ t’e Fift’ Groit Law an’ ye cannae be charged in any way because even i’ t’is negotiation gets off t’e hook, we’ve let t’e matter go. As a result o’ t’at violation t’ree o’ m’ crew were killed an’ twa wounded.  In t’e piracy attempt, a furt’er ane wa’ killed.  T’e murderer ‘as been charged but ‘is chance came because nane o’ ye but Kurin tried t’ stop ‘t.

“We lost Lenai Halin, t’e best riggin’ surveyor an’ sail lofter in m’ experience.  She wa’ a gentle soul ‘oo never raised ‘er voice t’ any.  She spent many ‘ours at m’ bedside teachin’ m’ t’ read yer script an’ figure wit’ yer numbers.  ‘Er son Arnat’s got nae mot’er now.  

“Helmsman Macoul wa’ dead before ‘e ‘it t’e boat under ‘im.  ‘E braved t’e Coriolis Storm, off ‘is wotch, t’ bring ‘ot food an’ drink t’ Barad an’ Darkistry as t’ey conned t’e ship int’ t’e eye o’ t’e storm.  A good mon.  Gone.  

“Bosun Modanet ‘elped direct t’e rescue operations wen t’e Princamorn sank.  ‘E an’ Barad pulled m’ oot o’ t’e woter an’ saved m’ life.  Died on yer ship wit’ never t’e attention o’ a doctor.  Cast overboard loike garbage.

“Our second day wotch drummer, Morga, a lad o’ fifteen.  Nae older’ll ‘e get.  Ripped apart an’ sent over t’e side by a Strong Skin catapult ‘arpoon aimed at Kurin an’ Darkistry.

“Like t’e mot’er Orca o’ Kurin’s tale, Oi’m surry for us bot’. We cannae bring t’em bock.  Oi propose t’at ye pay Arnat ten skins a Gat’ering for ‘is maintenance.  Any unused balance, an’ t’ere will be, is t’ go into ‘is Purser’s account as a nest egg for wen ‘e gets married.  For Lenai, we ask an annual rigging an’ sail survey dune by t’e Mordan at yer expense.  Any replacement cable or cordage is t’ be Mordan Twist.  We split t’e cost o’ any sails needed.  Oi ask yer ‘elp in Macoul’s case. Oi donnae know how t’ value ‘im.  Oi wish t’at Oi’d known ‘im better.”

“We are not responsible for …” Master Juris started when Mord, Alor and Mistress Daeron all silenced him.

Mistress Daeron said, “Even in the Rope Walk, I heard the fog drum go silent.  I knew that we were still in fog and I did not send to find the cause.  I know that the rest of us did the same because we have all discussed it.

“I do not know whether anything would have changed if we had investigated.  We cannot change it nor bring back your dead.  We should have tried.  That we are guilty of.  We stood by and did not even try to do something when we knew that something was wrong.  We heard the screams.  All of us.”

Tanlin answered her, “For our part, we precipitated t’e incident.  We approached ye under false colors.  Ever’ member o’ t’at party bore a message from m’ t’ clear t’at up after t’ey had gotten aboard.”  Tanlin paused and shook her head sadly, “We dinnae expect t’at nane o’ t’ dozen wad reach yer deck alive.

“We came t’ t’e Longin because we couldnae trust any ot’er ship except t’e Dorton, an’ we dinnae know w’ere she wa’.  We ‘oped t’ speak t’ Kurin.  At a ‘orrible cost we did.  She ‘as repaid our trust better t’an we could ‘ave ‘oped.  She’s even saved m’ Barad.

“T’e cost t’ ‘er wa’ equally ‘orrid.  T’ ‘elp us, she’s lost ‘er ‘ome ship.”

Master Juris spluttered, “She has not.  The Longin needs her.  We couldn’t send her away.  It would ruin us.”

Tanlin said scornfully, “W’at ye’ve just said makes t’e case.  Nae part o’ w’at any o’ ye said wa’, ‘We luve ‘er.’  Since ‘er fat’er died, only five beings on t’is world ‘ave said, ‘Oi luve ye’ t’ ‘er.  An’ t’ey were all birds.”

“Six,” Kurin interrupted, speaking to Tanlin.  “You were part of the flock that came to save me from Captain Urson.  And you have held and hugged me without needing a reason.”

Master Juris snorted, “We could do that.”

“T’en wye dinnae ye?” was Tanlin’s sharp retort.  “Ye ‘ad six Gat’erings t’ ‘elp a child.  All ye did wa’ teach ‘er an’ praise ‘er wen she did well.  No ‘ugs.  Naebody t’ ‘old. Just pain an’ emptiness inside, ‘eld at bay by learnin’ an’ work.”

A tear of gratitude leaked from Kurin’s eye as she said, “The last part of this Wergeld is this.  We will settle all the remaining unsettled claims.  I am the price you must pay.  I have found a home on the Grandalor, not just a place to stay.  

“Your Ship’s Business will remain safe, specifically, the mapping and charting, the navigation system, the Longin lace, and the fishing and shellfish taking and storage methods.

“I will come to the Longin to supervise and teach the school and also to map the Naral fleet waters according to your contracts.  From each Fall Gathering to each Spring Gathering I will be aboard the Grandalor while she trades with the Arrakan, Daroff, and Pallant fleets.  By the time that your mapping contract with the Naral fleet is done, if not well before, there should be others who can take over the school.

“That should complete the Wergeld and keep you safe from the Scattering that would otherwise be required.  We have thrown you a line.  Don’t drown.”

Kurin turned to Tanlin.  “Captain Tanlin, I have something for you.  It has nothing to do with the business of this Court.  This is my own free choice and I want it seen and witnessed by all.”  She held out her hands in the Arrakan style and knelt.  Tanlin took Kurin’s small hands in her own as Kurin began, “I Kurin Behar Longin, now of the Grandalor alone …”

“I wish that I had known about this kind of love when I gave you your Gift,” said Blind Mecat softly.  “I never got it either.”

-THE END-

<==PREVIOUS

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[quackspot]

i started thinking about that gay bastard oc of yours. platano. can u tell me about him

omg u wer thinkgin about platano..... mr banana man... mr 4011. i am obsessed with the banana code srry i just got back from work (it was good :-D)

any way. um. im going below the cut. he kidnaps people and he murders people and i hate him because he’s also a massive weeb so. hm

HISTORY OF PLATANO... yea his name is spanish for banana

his father, pablo, will probably get a name change someday but i literally never think of his father since the only thing he did in platano’s backstory was disappear 

since platano’s world has characters based off like. fruits and vegetables (there aren’t really any limit to what the characters are based off of. it was in my lazy google translate name phase so we have like... a gay character named arcenciel who becomes dadlike through my powerful canon-changing touch. also arcenciel wears the colors of the rainbow as often as he can i haven’t figured out a good design for him since i’m not used to using more than 5 colors. he also owns a hat factory)

i think arcenciel and platano are friends they met when platano was like. 17 probably and arcenciel would be around uhhhhh ummmmmmm 21??? idk man but in canon he’s probably around 30 . yes i m saying “in canon” because i wrote a really dumb and horrible story back in 2018 arcenciel used to have HUGE internalized homophobia and i turned that into a running joke and i dislike that so that’s a reason why i’m not sharing the fun little story i wrote for my friends

(the best part of that story is when arcenciel threw his light-up rainbow heelies at platano, thus starting the boss fight which the main cast LOST.)

ok back to the topic at hand. platano.

i have a whole doc named platano where i just wrote drabbles about him so i’m going to summarize them

the first one was his friend, percisi (my only cishet oc he’s very short and very aggressive while also dressing in a soft-colored turtleneck since he’s based off of peaches) using a misunderstood form of satanism to summon satan. guess what percisi and platano summoned satan for. it was a manga update! wow

i won’t say the mangas name it was an inside joke

so platano was like “hey satan can i have this manga now please please” and satan went “sure just kill people for me” 

that determined platanos job for the next 7 or so years <3 wonderful. 

(it was basically me writing a backstory for a scene to happen in the main writing i wrote for my friends. he killed someone because someone else in the building was trying to summon satan. very confusing but okay i guess.)

i think right after that i wrote about platano meeting his boyfriend, sage, for the first time. i have horribly mixed feelings about their relationship since it’s very. Hm.

so platano kidnaps people to watch anime with him because all his friends left him and his best friend, mangue, is too busy being a dictator over the Land of the Fruits. i shit you not fruits oppressed the vegetables. i wrote that dynamic between the two because i was learning about the revolutionary war in US History. something like that at least

(the Land of the Fruits is not the official name)

on the topic of kidnapping people. guess who his favorite person was. sage. it was sage. so he tried to take sage often but they probably discussed Proper boundaries since everyone else tried to run away. hmm i am now going to write a bit right now 

“Platano,” Sage started. “Why do you keep kidnapping me? It’s rude and I hate it.”

“What else am I supposed to do?” The yellow-haired fool leaned on his sword, digging the tip deeper into the ground. 

“ASK ME IF I WANT TO HANG OUT??” 

“I can do that?”

“You keep making my dads worried.” Sage looked around the area, fidgeting with his hands. 

“Oh. Okay. Want to hang out? Watch some anime?” Platano paused for a moment, but managed to say “Maybe kiss?” before Sage got to answer.

“I- KISS??? We can watch anime together. We can go now.” 

Sage ushered Platano through a portal as fast as he could. 

His dads were never worried.

hmmm maybe that’s alright idk i’m a little tired so it’s probably a little out of character. sage probably isn’t that loud but i think it was trying to be the dynamic of “oh, we’re not dating” when they kiss every sunday at 5 pm by a romantic river scene 

he’s a character who is, at his very core, horrible and bad. he is portrayed in a way i DESPISE but i’m too lazy to correct it. his interest in sage actually started with me going “hmm i think platano would draw sage like this” then sauce giving me fun facts about his oc, sage, yea sage is sauce’s oc <3 epic win . so sauce gave me fun facts about sage and i was like “time to doodle these in platanos ‘art style’” when in reality it’s just the mockery of people just getting into an anime art style, with the chin so pointy it could cut a cake 

i might reread my old writing from 2018. i gotta agree with the judges for that year i did not write very well

it mightve actually been made in 2017 which would be FUCKIN CRAZY im gonna check rn 

yea it was started in 2018. february 14th... huh . finished it completely in june of that year it was 41 pages total and it’s not even double spaced how did i write something without double spacing it

OH MY GOD BOB IS GOING TO HIJACK THIS RANT JUST FOR A LITTLE

so bob is a fluffy little anthro cloud with a grey top hat and bowtie. he is amazing. i love bob. bob is another one of sauce’s character and mangue (mentioned earlier) was made by my friend jamie 

(you can always ask for their tumblrs but i’d ask them if its okay to share their tumblrs. i might just look at them and reblog their stuff cuz i like their art!!! maybe jamie posted a drawing she made recently on her blog but tbh i don’t think she would she’s more of a twitter user)

ok so im skimming thru UMG which is the story it stands for “Universe of Magic Gardens” and it was originally made for a prank on ponytown so people would go “what’s UMG” and my friends and i would be like “ur mom gay xDDDDDD” or something like that . horrible but i’m glad i’ve changed from . that.

here’s a bit i actually like AKLJFISJFIO

“What the actual FUCK, Ilkie?!” Arcenciel cringed in fear. “Put it back- it’s too ugly.” He pointed at Platano, whose arms were crossed. 

why is it bolded. anyway.

i just saw a part where eau used y’all... water cowboy moments <333 i really need to make refs for all of those old characters. all of my umg-related characters have to be my oldest-living ocs. 

i cant believe this is making me genuinely reread my old writing just to go “WJHFSIDAJKSFIOJ WTF????” 

some of the lines on it sound like something you would hear on like. a school bus or somethin 

looking at umg like “wtf how did i add so much Meat to this writing” bc most of my writing now is mostly quotations to progress the story (like the quickie i wrote earlier. i could add meat to it but im  tired lol)

OK THIS IS MORE GENERAL BUT MY FAVORITE THING ABOUT THIS WAS WRITING HAIKUS FOR PORTALS. after you visit a place enough times it’s kind of just an instinct to open a portal there so you don’t have to recite a haiku 

uhh ok here’s another bit becuase im feeling like living la vida loca.  ur biggest regret should be “can you tell me about him” by this point bc i’ve written too much to go back now

He landed on his face once he was outside of the hat. Meko quickly walked over to the guest room, opened the Portals for Dummies book, and flipped to a page. It looked devious.

“Banana, mango,

Each tasting amazingly.

A taste of evil.” 

Meko did the dance on the page, it consisted of something that looks like it’s from an anime. A portal opened, the familiar scent of bananas and mangoes coming from it. With some hesitation, Meko stepped in. He quickly made it so only his head peeked in.

it wasnt bolded this time but i like it bolded. ok i understand how i added meat it was just shitty expired meat ALKFSJSHDAIUJKFEIODSJAK . it wasnt even that much meat DAMN. it just looked like more.

actually that’s all i will write. i could  do more w platano but yea at his base he is a blonde twink who kills people because he wanted a manga but now he’s friends with a dictator. woo! wow. amazing character writing. i cant wait to get motivation to rewrite everything and make platano a good villain (he will still be very interested in anime sadly. idk why around that time i liked making characters who were obsessed with anime i didn’t even watch it much myself. i think it was because i wanted to put capes on them)