Culture Shock
Choco_Pom
[Video: A rather blurry, dark video. A blond in a comfy yellow purple hoodie trying to muffle his laughs, with only his lower half of his face visible. Even then, its mostly hidden by a fluffy domesticated coeurl’s snow white fur as a loud tirade in galah goes on in the background along with the sound of the tv.
The camera flips around and barely shows what seems like a very distressed man slouching in the sofa topless and in a patterned sleeping slacks. Although some tattoos are visible on his neck along with his braids. Obviously a Galahdian. Sounds of the Great Insomnia Cookoff echoes in the room. The man is supporting his forehead against the palm of his hand leaning on the side while the cat smoothly patters towards the man’s lap, laying down on its new perch to groom. There is also a immensely large cat tree at the side of the room.
A cheeky ‘pliss help me’ text is added overhead.
“-This is amazing, the smell is aromatic but just a tad too much that it overpowers the natural robustness of the Garula.”
Suddenly, he sits up and gestures wildly at the tv in great offence while talking in rapid Galah. The cat gets startled and leaps off. Rough subtitles are kindly provided for what comes next.
Subs:“How can you guys import spices from Galahd all these years but not know how to use them properly?! Ridiculous! Its not complicated-!”
Beep. Scene cut.
“-Also the rice is too wet-”
Subs:“Wet. Wet?! You wet curtain! Thats not even the problem! Wheres the pandan leaves? The damn coconut milk?? Somewhere, a grandmother will disown you for this, Etro forbid you to dishonour her name in her house with this travesty-!”
Beep. Scene cut.
“-And it seems like there is too much gravy that sticks to the skin, almost too starchy and pastey. Its, making it very dry in my mouth-”
Subs:“YOU are dryer than the paste.Its Garula Rendang!? Not Garula Stew! The pemasak IS suppose to be like a paste that is thicker than your foundation! Are you high??You-!”
Beep. Scene cut.
“-And I would appreciate more if its surface is more crispy”
The Galahdian’s fingers are pinched together with a tensed posture, audibly scowling incredulously at the screen. Almost hoping he can put everything before him out of its misery.
Subs:“What in great Etro’s graces is a crispy Rendang!? CRISPY!? Are you stupid?That Garula is crying in the Beyond just for that! A chef?! More like a damn hack! Legs on the Midgardsormr! In what way are you cooking actual Galahdian food? Where did you even learn all this?! 18 ancestors before you probably be rolling in embarrassment! This is a sin! Absolute crime! Pick any three year old and they can even cook better than this-!”
The video is shaking so much by now with a boy’s laughter that he is sniffling off camera while trying to persuade the Galahdian to relax and the video ends. ]
65,906 likes
Choco_Pom Not an accurate translation but you get the idea lmao. #GreatInsomniaCookoff #ImAmazed #WTFaretheycookingtho #Sacrilage
Glads
As a Lucian, Im so sorry to our fellow Galahdians.
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LunarPrincess
I laughed, I’m so sorry, he seems stressed, is he okay though?
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DuskDawn
LOL to be fair I been to Galahd for summer holidays and damn I feel the same way.That is not in anyway Garula Rendang. This show is a joke.
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Gator3
wow, if you don’t like it then don’t watch? better yet don’t come here?
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SpiceyMalboro
I’m Galahdian and this was me and my roommate throughout that entire episode, such terrible, much cringe.
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MooglePrincess
THE KITTY IS ADORABLE?! EXCUSE ME??
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QuestionableFlan
LMAO ABSOLUTE MOOD. Tho dude seems awfully familiar to me tho…
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LadySopi
This video maybe dark as hell but dammnnnn I know a Snacc when I see one.
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Mimirmimir
His rage is absolutely valid! Hahaha tho should let him try some of the ‘authentic galahd cuisine’ we got here. Will be wild!
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——
[Pom 11:20pm] : (sadchocobo.gif)
[Noc 11:33pm] : sup. Y u still up?
[Ig 11:33pm] : Indeed. How peculiar.
[Gladdy 11:33pm] : ?
[Pom 11:34pm] : No sleepover this weekend. Im like grounded.
[Noc 11:34pm] : lollollol Y? Cuz u got Nyx trending?
[Pom 11:34pm] : I DIDNT KNOW THE STUPID VIDEO WOULD BLOW UP
[Pom 11:34pm] : I DELEYTED IT BUT ITS ON KWEHTER TOO
[Pom 11:34pm] : Good thing that his face was not obvious and he didn’t get trouble at work!
[Pom 11:36pm] : Why am I so dumb??? (/ TAT)/
[Noc 11:37pm] : haaaaa was he mad?
[Pom 11:36pm] : NO AND THATS WORSE
[Ig 11:37pm] : On the bright side, the video was indeed not very obvious, Prompto.
[Gladdy 11:37pm] : it will die down lol shit on social be like that
[Ig 11:33pm] : Indeed. We’ll cross the bridge when we get there.
[Pom 11:36pm] : (baby chocobo falls over.gif)
——
Trending Now
> #NifleheimCivilWar
> #DontOffendaGalahdian
> #GreatInsomniaCookoff
> #MinistryofHealthEmbezzelment
> #DonQuilardMayBrahmsAffair
> #CultofBahamutUncovered
> #TenebraenSummers
(Show More)
——
[Little Moon]
[Selena 1:20pm] : hahahaha I know those tattoos anywhere. With or without a face heh.
[Selena 1:20pm] : also Zasiifa’s looks good!
[Selena 1:20pm] : how did you end up trending on social btw?
[Nyx 1:33pm] : hello dear sister i’m very well I am having lunch yes thank you
[Nyx 1:33pm] : why have you invaded my space this lovely afternoon squirt?
[Selena 1:35pm] : I’m just here to remind you to call mom as always
[Selena 1:35pm] : And that you are also trending here in Galahd hahahahaha
[Nyx 1:37pm] : [ √ message seen ]
——
Good afternoon Mr Ulric,
I hope this email finds you well. This is to inform you of a faculty meeting later today. Please do note your attendance is compulsory.
With regards,
Nelly Mason
RUL FAC Faculty Administrative Office
——-
*dusts off this strange scrap and drops it*
Might as well clear up some random things sitting in my folder? Also I have no tiktok and it shows
Basically Nyx has a non lethal coeurl that look more like modern day white serval. Referenced from the ff kingsglaive concept art of the mini coeurl.
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