#inez the fish

[inezthefish]

he’s been 14 for a month 😠😠

[riaki]

guys pls consider… lifeguard!gojo bit inspired by a post i saw a long time ago from @/shotorus, thank u sel + inez !

lifeguard!gojo, who signs you in for a pool session and gives you the wrong time-slot wristband because he’s too busy gawking at you with hearts in his blue eyes to notice he registered you to swim for 12pm-2pm. when, in reality, it’s 4pm in the afternoon and the hot sun is slowly sinking in the sky.

lifeguard!gojo, who mistakes your polite attempts to correct him as signs of disinterest; he sees things through romance-tinted glasses. of course he can't keep a wounded pride, and so he makes it his saturday afternoon goal to win your heart. after all, who in their right mind would reject him in all his dashing chlorine scented glory?

lifeguard!gojo, who reintroduces himself all suave and cool and he thinks it's working mid-hair slick-back— until he gets smacked in the face by a stray rubber ball, and his sunglasses go flying. it leaves a red spot of hashmarks on his nose, like the ball was a cookie cutter and he was the dough. but he doesn't mind, because he got to hear your pretty laugh as you pick up his shades and hand them back to him, albeit at his own expense. you even say a cute thing or two about the chipped popsicle sticker on the frame.

lifeguard!gojo, who's unreasonably (and immaturely) upset over the fact he can't seductively rub sunscreen into your back because you already have beforehand. but he's not complaining; it smells good when he's forced a little closer to you to avoid a rampaging train of kids running across the pool deck. he should yell at them, but the smell of summery citrus and sea salt wafting on the humid breeze distracts him.

lifeguard!gojo, who pours every ounce of his remaining energy into gettin your attention the entire time you're there— with loud whistle blows from the scribble-adorned plastic whistle hanging from his neck, grabbing your attention, only to just offer a charming wink in your direction. or, squeezing idle small talk between every lap you swim, teasing you with a lazy grin on his lips from under his shaded lifeguard stand when you complain about the heat of the blazing sun.

lifeguard!gojo, who ropes his poor, exhausted snack stand friend with the blonde hair and dark shadows beneath his eyes into helping him— when you give up on swimming laps and begrudgingly let him convince you into going down the waterslides as if you’re a nine year old with neon pink inflatable buoy rings around your arms.

lifeguard!gojo, who forces nanami (snack stand man) to ‘accidentally’ send you down the slide early— you’re caught up in the surprise, the sound of rushing water and kids shouting and a cicada’s buzz filling your ears— and before you know it you’re tossed into the bottom of the pool by the stream of water, disoriented and panicking until two steady arms fish you out of the pool.

lifeguard!gojo, who ‘rescues you from drowning’ holding you bridal style to his chest with his sunglasses balanced on the edge of his nose, letting you catch a glimpse of his uncanny blue eyes hidden beneath his dripping white hair. his whistle lanyard hangs loosely around his neck, drawing a line down the center of his toned chest.

lifeguard!gojo, who can’t help but double over as he laughs obnoxiously— boyishly when he gets to watch your face flush cherry as you scramble to get out of his arms and fall straight back into the refreshing water with a splash.

lifeguard!gojo, who’s forced to reconcile with what he thinks is defeat when he gets you kicked out of the pool early because of his earnest registering mistake— and in doing so, you forget your ring on the pool deck. it's just your luck— you don't even realize it until the sun's almost set and you’re halfway home.

lifeguard!gojo, who’s cleaning up and getting ready to close for the night when he spots a gleam of silver reflecting the hazy purple sunset, and he recognizes it as your jewelry (even though that was the first time he ever met you). of course he'd remember it— he'd been absentmindedly staring at your fingers, burning them into his mind; imagining how they'd feel in his damp hair.

lifeguard!gojo, who slips your ring into his pocket after trying it on and marveling at how small your hands must be in comparison to his.

lifeguard!gojo, who’s cleaning out the gutters, waist deep in the pool, when he hears your voice again— pretty like birdsong in the spring, dew gathering on the fragile petals of blooming petals.

lifeguard!gojo, who waits for you to come in— the gate was unlocked— and watches as you kneel on the concrete deck, elbows on your knees as you smile down at him. you look really cute, with your hair falling over your face like that, framed by the dying sunlight.

lifeguard!gojo, who’s a little disheartened when you tell him all you came back for was your ring, and not him. or his phone number.

lifeguard!gojo, who disappears beneath the water for a moment— then resurfaces from the pool dripping wet, hair clinging to his face while he acts as though he'd found your ring at the bottom of the pool. "it's stainless steel, yeah? don't worry about rust." he reassures you with a chuckle when you panic; he thinks it's cute.

lifeguard!gojo, who holds the ring just out of your grasp when you make a grab for it, laughing as you almost fall right into the pool.

lifeguard!gojo, who tells you he'll only give it back if you give him your phone number in exchange as he climbs out of the pool and sits next to you, on the gutters, the sound of rushing water filling his ear.

lifeguard!gojo, who, sitting by your side, focuses on the way the pool looks with the lights turned on, an ethereal underwater dreamscape distorted by the incessant moving water. a way of distracting himself from how beautiful you look in the painted sunset.

lifeguard!gojo, who gets his first taste of you when you ask him to face you; you muffle his yelp of surprise, but it doesn’t matter because you taste even better than you smell, a sweetness like crystal rock candy and blueberries on his tongue when his lips meet yours.

lifeguard!gojo, who takes the opportunity to catch your wrist and slide your ring back onto your finger with a quick lingering kiss to your cheek; his lips are a little wet from his earlier pool dip, but the dreamy look in your eyes tells him you don’t mind.

lifeguard!gojo, who sees you out, still riding on the thrill of your lips; the pride in his chest now that he's got your contact saved on his phone with an excessive amount of heart emojis and a (˘ڡ˘ς) next to your name.

lifeguard!gojo, who can't wait for the next time you come back to the pool, and who ignores the angry slew of texts from his boss scolding him for leaving the gate unlocked in favor of the selfie you send him.

you: [ one image attached ]

lifeguard boy 🛟🤍 : GAYATTTTT LET ME HIT PLSPLSPLSS 🙈🙈😝😝😝😋😋🤞🔥🔥🔥⁉️‼️🔞💯💯😼😻💺💺🗽

bonus: nanami gets u two popsicles to share tagging @sugumimi NAOMI I HOPE THIS IS WHAT U WERE TALKING AB my (riaki) stuff. don’t repost and/or plagiarize !

[chuluoyi]

gojo never tells you he’s super ticklish and when you try to seduce him and trail a finger down his chest for the first time he flops off the bed like a fish bc he’s laughing too hard

INEZ HSHAHAH like a fish😭 this is actually cute and so very him😭😭😭 like i wanna see him FAIL so bad at seduction and being seduced bcs he’s a total loser

[4ugust]

all of the references in the lavender haze music video:

1. mastermind

2. sagittarius (taylor) and pisces (joe) constellations

3. midnights vinyl

4. incense on a vinyl shelf (maroon)

5. a clock that strikes midnight

6. midnight rain forecast

7. inez? “your ex-friend’s sister” girl?

8. koi fish like the speak now tour guitar

[laporcupina]

Blue hearts (9-1-1)

A coda to 6x10/6x11 | 1300 words, Taylor Kelly

++

Taylor’s in the newsroom working late because it’s Santa Ana season and everyone’s working late. Buck once told her that first responders hate the Santa Anas because the wind makes people do weird shit, but weird shit is good business for her. She has already filed a story about a woman out in Brentwood going around pouring yellow paint on cars to protest a proposed rideshare law and now she’s working on the dry lightning story because it’s too big for just Jose and he might be better at investigative work but she’s the one with camera presence.

The big screen on the wall is showing a building fire and once upon a time she’d have been paying close attention, offering to take it even though she’s high enough up on the food chain now that if someone from the mayor’s office isn’t there than neither is she. Once upon a time, she’d joked about hot firefighters but it had always ever been about knowing what was happening before she got an awkward phone call from Bobby Nash because she wasn’t Buck’s next-of-kin. (She’d never cared that Buck hadn’t changed it from Maddie; his reasons weren’t about his lack of commitment.)

But it’s not once upon a time just like it’s not happily ever after and so she turns away and back to her own screen because Jose’s notes read like he’s cramming for a midterm and not a three minute hit before the weather report.

(She knows the 118 is there because nobody in this newsroom will ever stop telling her when the 118 is there. It’s only partially mean-spirited.)

“Holy fuck!” someone yells and she looks up. The cameras on the scene are running B-roll that someone not-her will be narrating later and, without needing to focus on a reporter, the camera is pulled in for a tight shot of a firefighter dangling limply at the end of an extended ladder like bait at the end of a fishing line. Or a sacrifice to an unholy god.

“Lightning strike on the ladder. Blew one guy clean off, other one’s just hanging there.”

She gives up pretending she doesn’t care and stands to watch.

The camera pulls back to another firefighter scrambling up the ladder and while it’s pouring rain and the floodlights are making the reflective strips spark like flares as the man moves, she can make out the name on the back: Diaz.

Eddie’s not the only Diaz in the LAFD and any Diaz would be running for whoever it was at the end of the tether. But she knows it’s him, even in the pouring rain, even in the dark cut by floodlights; he gets illuminated in profile and she can see enough. And she knows that he would be the closest man for precisely one firefighter and Taylor reaches blindly for her desk because she needs something that will stand still while her world is suddenly spinning.

***

The rest of the night is a haze. She texts her friend Olivia that she thinks she just watched Buck die on TV and then tries to focus on Jose’s notes like they will make more sense now that they are the only thing that might keep her together. She gets sent home at eleven by her editor because everyone is going home now that the rain is down to a drizzle. She doesn’t look at her phone until she’s got a glass of wine in her hand and there is a long string of increasingly concerned texts from Liv and two voicemails and she just can’t right now.

In the morning there’s a post on the station website about the fire, the footage of the lightning strike in prime position on the page and autoplaying. Inez did the news story because she gets stuck on overnights and she doesn’t say who it was or which hospital the ten injuries got sent to and Taylor has to decide whether to ask her. Inez is young and pretty and would shank her own grandmother for a scoop and Taylor respects that about her – game recognizes game. Inez isn’t giving her the time of day unless there’s something in it for her and Taylor hesitates on paying that price. Right now, the fire story is clickbait because of the video, but the video will be all over socials by nine-thirty and the story link will be down by the hockey scores and horoscopes by lunch. Inez finding out about Buck will have that story on the top of the site all day because then she’ll have an exclusive – the names that the LAFD has thus far refused to release. Taylor’s not ready to give Inez anything that will get her off of the graveyard shift.

The problem is that she’s got no other options right now. The Jonah Greenway story didn’t just end her relationship with Buck, it also burned all of her other sources. There isn’t anyone at the LAFD who will talk to her on or off the record; the brass hate that she exposed their shitty due diligence in hiring Greenway and the rank-and-file all think she nearly got Hen Wilson and Chimney Han killed. She lets everyone think she doesn’t do fire stories anymore because of a bad breakup, but the truth is that she can’t get anything out of anyone anymore. The entire station has trouble now.

She has no other options and so that’s why she’s knocking on Eddie Diaz’s door that afternoon. Eddie didn’t like her when she was with Buck and she’s sure he likes her even less now, but he’s the member of the 118 least likely to slam the door in her face and that’s enough right now.

Eddie doesn’t answer the door; Carla does. Carla tells her what and where, but also tells her not to go. It’s kindly said, but Carla’s do-not-bullshit-me tone is clear. Everyone from the 118 is there, none of them want to see her, and she no longer has the right to intrude on their privacy.

Taylor wants to say that she doesn’t have to make herself hurt more to make them feel better, but there’s a sudden, desperate, awful wail from the back of the house and it has to be Christopher and Carla gives her a meaningful look before telling her to be well and closing the door.

She can hear Christopher still, crying out for Buck and for his father and it makes her shudder and turn to go.

Back in her car, she calls Buck’s phone and it goes straight to voicemail and she isn’t even sure what she says but she’s glad she got to say something, that the inbox isn’t full. That in case this is ‘goodbye’ she gets to do it pretending he will hear it and not to his coffin.

It’s not to his coffin. LAFD announces that one firefighter has been released from the hospital and, a week later, the second one.  

Two weeks later, she gets a text from Buck’s number: “Thanks” and a blue heart and it makes her laugh despite herself because they had once had a protracted and somewhat drunken debate over what non-red hearts in texts meant and Buck had decided that blue was for nice things and green was insincere for reasons that had made no sense at the time and are lost to her now. Despite everything, she misses him sometimes and right now, she wishes she still had the right to turn up at his apartment and give him a hug.

[thecookieverse]

Cookieverse: Schools

Milkyway Elementary

Known Students

Alfajor Cookie (Inez)

Apple Cookie

Apple Dodger Cookie (Ferb)

Astronaut Food Cookie (Dib Membrane)

Babosa Cookie (Tanis)

Banana Pancake Cookie (Quincy)

Basil Cookie (Buttercup)

Bell Pepper Cookie

Berry Gel Cookie (Sally)

Berry Smoothie Cookie (Keesha)

Bitter Melon Cookie (Violet)

Blackberry Pie Cookie (Schroeder)

Blue Corn Cookie (Boomer)

Blue Taro Cookie (Tim)

Blueberry Kulfi Cookie (Baljeet)

Blueberry Jam Cookie (Lucy)

Burrito Cookie (K.O.)

Candy Bone Cookie (Skid)

Candy Jack Cookie (Ralphie)

Carrot Puff Cookie (Arnold)

Cavatappi Cookie (Frieda)

Champurrado Cookie (Carlos)

Chili Dog Cookie (Hoagie P. Gilligan Jr./Numbuh 2)

Chocolate Swirl Cookie (Jimmy Neutron)

Concord Juice Cookie (Sibella)

Coney Dog Cookie (Winnie)

Cornflower Cookie (Franklin)

Cranberry Flan Cookie (Jackie)

Cream Pie Cookie (Charlotte)

Cucumber Cookie (Dendy)

Daffodil Cookie (Dorothy Ann)

Dandelion Cookie (Jimmy)

Dirt Cake Cookie (Pigpen)

Ditalini Cookie (Leo)

Farfalle Cookie (Annie)

Food Coloring Cookie (Adeleine)

Fruit Punch Cookie (PPG!Brick)

Ghost Pipe Cookie (Phantasma)

Gold Truffle Cookie (Princess Morbucks)

Gouda Cookie (Buford)

Green Bean Cookie (Phoebe)

Hokey Pokey Cookie (Wallabee Beetles/Numbuh 4)

Honeydew Cookie (Elsa Frankenteen)

Key Lime Cookie (Cyberchase!Matt)

Lemon Gel Cookie (Charlie Brown)

Marshmallow Bunny Cookie (Panini)

Matcha Choco Cookie (Kuki Sanban/Numbuh 3)

Mellowcreme Pumpkin Cookie (Pump)

Mint Cream Cookie (Peppermint Patty)

Mochi Cookie (Wanda)

Nori Cookie (Butch)

Oleander Cookie (Grim Adventures!Mandy)

Orchid Cookie (June)

Pink Lemonade Cookie (Blossom)

Pixy Powder Cookie (Timmy Turner)

Pudding Pop Cookie (Chowder)

Pumpkin Brownie Cookie (Marcie)

Raspberry Jam Cookie (Linus)

Salsa Chip Cookie (Phineas)

Salted Caramel Cookie (Abigail Lincoln/Numbuh 5)

Soda Bread Cookie (Fanny Fulbright/Numbuh 86)

Soft Serve Cookie (Funkin Dusk)

Strawberry Fool Cookie (Nigel Uno/Numbuh 1)

Sufganiyah Cookie (Isabella)

Sugar Cookie (Bubbles)

Star Jelly Cookie (Zim)

Tangelo Cookie (Billy)

Tangerine Tanghulu Cookie

Vieux Lille Cookie (Sarah)

Walnut Cookie

Former Students

Five-Layer Cookie (DCFDTL); were kidnapped and brainglazed by Black Olive Cookie (Father)

Tarator Cookie (Vendetta); Expelled for horrific bullying and her dessert monster creations hurting other students. Also the incident where she tried to take over the school on show-and-tell day. That too.

Known Faculty

Beacon Apple Cookie (Bea Spells-A-Lot, part-time tutor)

Gelatin Cookie (Edd/Double D, part-time science tutor)

Honeycrisp Apple Cookie (Ms. Frizzle, teacher)

McIntosh Red Cookie (Will Wedgewood/Wonder-Red; teacher)

Nigiri Cookie (Makoto Nijima, part-time tutor)

Orange Pippin Cookie (Ms. Keene, teacher)

Sucrose Junior High

Known Students

Apple Pie Cookie (Paula Polestar)

Beacon Apple Cookie (Bea Spells-A-Lot)

Blueberry Churro Cookie (Frida Suarez)

Bratwurst Cookie (Rolf)

Camembert Cookie (Ed)

Candy Jewel Cookie (Jewel Sparkles)

Caprese Salad Cookie (Kevin)

Chocolate Truffle Cookie (Trixie Carter)

Circus Peanut Cookie (Peanut Big Top)

Custard Doughnut Cookie (Jeff Andonuts)

Ergot Cookie (Hotaru Tomoe/Sailor Saturn)

Fish Stick Cookie (Lee Kanker)

Garlic Cookie (EW!Dawn)

Gelatin Cookie (Edd/Double D)

Granola Cookie (Jonny)

Grape Jam Cookie (Mabel)

Gum Scrap Cookie (Ness)

Jawbreaker Cookie (Eddy)

Lanatus Dragon Cookie (Jake Long)

Lemon Swirl Cookie (Lucas)

Limburger Cookie (May Kanker)

Mashed Potato Cookie (Marie Kanker)

Orange Swirl Cookie (Claus)

Passion Fruit Cookie (Nazz)

Peanut Butter Cookie (Dipper)

Pork Rind Cookie (Porky Minch)

Prickly Pear Cookie (Kumatora)

Rocket Pop Cookie (Dot Starlight)

Russet Potato Cookie (Arthur “Spud” Spudinski)

Spaghetti Marinara Cookie (Spot Splatter Splash)

Sprinkle Cookie (Crumbs Sugar Cookie)

Valerian Cookie (Pillow Featherbed)

Whipped Cocoa Cookie (Mittens Fluff 'N' Stuff)

White Truffle Cookie (Pacifica Northwest)

Yellow Lily Cookie (Rose)

Fructose High School

Known Students

Ackee Fruit Cookie (Monika)

Apple Cider Cookie (Applejack)

Beef Bowl Cookie (Yu Narukami)

Berry Soda Cookie (Ami Mizuno/Sailor Mercury)

Blackberry Cheesecake Cookie (Totally Spies!Mandy)

Black Currant Cookie (Raven)

Black Rose Cookie (Sam Manson)

Buffalo Sauce Cookie (Randy Cunningham)

California Roll Cookie (Naoto Shirogane)

Candy Ring Cookie (Rarity)

Chamomile Cookie (Yuri)

Chocolate Crepe Cookie (Ann Takamaki)

Clam Cookie (Cyborg)

Confetti Cake Cookie (Pinkie Pie)

Cordyceps Cookie (Shawn)

Coriander Cookie (Starfire)

Creme Sandwich Cookie (Danny Fenton/Phantom)

Curly Fry Cookie (Howard Weinerman)

Curry Cookie (Futaba Sakura)

Gala Apple Cookie (Sammy)

Gateau Cookie (Vanessa)

Gummy Fish Cookie (Lagoona Blue)

Haricot Vert Cookie (Jean-Sebastian Renault/Wonder-Green)

Hero Cookie

Jelly Worm Cookie (Ghoulia Yelps)

Kale Cookie (Robin)

Katsu Sando Cookie (Akira Kurusu/Joker)

Kumquat Cookie (Leshawna)

Lemon Mint Cookie (Frankie Stein)

Marshmallow Pie Cookie (Usagi Tsukino/Sailor Moon)

Manju Cookie (Yukiko Amagi)

Meat Bun Cookie (Ryuji Sakamoto)

Melopita Cookie (Cleo de Nile)

MRE Cookie (TD!Brick)

Myrtle Cookie (Minako Aino/Sailor Venus)

Nanaimo Bar Cookie (Owen)

Nigiri Cookie (Makoto Nijima)

Orange Blossom Cookie (Zoey)

Orange Creme Cookie (Jasmine “Jazz” Fenton)

Orzo Cookie (Mike)

Pansy Cookie (Fluttershy)

Papanași Cookie (Mariana Kretzulesco/Wonder-Pink)

Pepperoni Pizza Cookie (Geoff)

Pink Licorice Cookie (Draculaura)

Pizza Cookie

Pizza Pocket Cookie (Total Drama!Sam)

Poppy Seed Cookie (Clover)

Potato Stew Cookie (Yosuke Hanamura)

Protein Bar Cookie (Tyler)

Purple Tea Cookie (Sierra)

Red Delicious Cookie (Amy)

Ruby Choco Cookie (Sayori)

Salsa Cookie (Candace)

Samosa Cookie (Noah)

Sandwich Cookie

Seaweed Brownie Cookie (Bridgette)

Shaved Ice Cookie (Abbey Bominable)

Sour Straw Cookie (Tucker Foley)

Some Total Drama contestants (Excluding Biscuit Cookie/Ezekiel, obviously.)

Sports Drink Cookie (Rainbow Dash)

Steak Cookie (Chie Satonaka)

Strawberry Cupcake Cookie (Natsuki)

Tin Cookie (Makoto Kino/Sailor Jupiter)

Toaster Tart Cookie (Harold)

Tofu Cookie (Beast Boy)

Vegemite Cookie (TD!Jasmine)

Veggie Chip Cookie (Totally Spies!Sam)

Vichyssoise Cookie (Rise Kujikawa)

Watermelon Snake Cookie (Deuce Gorgon)

Wolfsbane Cookie (Clawdeen Wolf)

Wonton Cookie (Alex)

Yakitori Cookie (Kanji Tatsumi)

Former Students

Cobalt Cookie (Scarlett; Expelled after it was discovered that she was trying to recruit students to the Cookies of Darkness)

Dagwood Sandwich Cookie (Norville “Shaggy” Rogers; graduated)

Deviled Egg Cookie (Fred Jones; graduated)

Sweet Potato Cookie (Velma Dinkley; graduated)

Toxic Sludge Cookie (Izzy; expelled due to her crazy antics)

Patisserie Academy

A high-end private high school.

Known Students

Buttered Pancake Cookie (Goro Akechi)

Champagne Cookie (Mitsuru Kirijo)

Chicken Salad Cookie (Haruka Tenou/Sailor Uranus)

Coffee Crisp Cookie (Cody)

Fruit Salad Cookie (Haru Okumura)

Galette Cookie (Lindsay)

Jagariko Cookie (Yusuke Kitagawa)

Loco Moco Cookie (Justin)

Rose Water Cookie (Senpai/Kenji Sakubara)

Saba Sashimi Cookie (Michiru Kaiou/Sailor Neptune)

Saffron Cookie (Alejandro)

Sashimi Cookie (Heather)

Tuxedo Cake Cookie (Mamoru Chiba/Tuxedo Mask)

Watercress Cookie (Dakota)

Former Students

Blueberry Cheesecake Cookie (Daphne Blake; graduated)

Sugarcane Academy

A university/college

Known Students

Black Rice Cookie (Krishna Ramanujon/Wonder Black)

Blackthorn Cookie (Faith Fernandez)

Blueberry Tart Cookie (Vicky Schmidt)

Calla Lily Cookie (Joy Johnson-Johijima)

Cherry Pepper Cookie (Amira Rashid)

Cypress Cookie (Setsuna Meiou/Sailor Pluto)

Elderberry Cookie (Oz)

Filius Blue Cookie (Dahlia Aquino)

Ghost Pepper Cookie (Damien LeVey)

Gummy Hoop Cookie (Gogo)

Henbane Cookie (Hope Halko)

Ikasumi Pasta Cookie (Zoe)

Keema Cookie (Aaravi Mishra)

Maki Roll Cookie (Hiro Hamada)

Potato Chip Cookie (Scott Howl)

Purple Kale Cookie (Liam de Lioncourt)

Rafflesia Cookie (Brian Yu)

Saltwater Taffy Cookie (Miranda Vanderbilt)

Sour Snake Cookie (Vera Oberlin)

Taco Cookie (Fred Frederickson IV)

Vodka Cookie (Polly Geist)

Yuzu Cookie (Honey Lemon)

Zucchini Cookie (Wasabi)

Former Students

Slushie Cookie (Boyfriend/Jacob; Dropped out)

Parfaedia Institute

An all-ages magic school set in the city of Parfaedia

Known Students

Acai Cookie (Twilight Sparkle)

Bay Laurel Cookie (TD!Dawn)

Clerodendrum Cookie (Musa)

Coralline Algae Cookie (Tecna)

Cream Puff Cookie

Fruity Puff Cookie (Leonard)

Nasturtium Cookie (Bloom)

Prune Juice Cookie

Sunflower Cookie (Stella)

Tulip Cookie (Flora)

Water Lily Cookie (Aisha)

Known Faculty

Almond Cookie (Preventing Magical Accidents & Mishaps professor)

Capricious Wizard (Substitute Teacher)

Eclair Cookie (History professor)

Espresso Cookie (Theorems of Coffee Magic professor)

Latte Cookie (Entry-Level Magic Circles professor)

Parfaedia Principal (Principal)

Former Students

Ackee Fruit Cookie (Monika, transferred to Fructose High)

Honeycrisp Apple Cookie (Ms. Frizzle, graduated)

Mistletoe Cookie (Icy, expelled)

Nightshade Cookie (Darcy, dropped out)

Prune Cookie (Yzma; graduated… Somehow… in her youth)

Zephyr Lily Cookie (Stormy, dropped out)

Scovilla

An all-ages school situated in Dragon's Valley

Known Students

Capsaicin Cookie 

Jalapeño Cookie (Duncan)

Kimchi Cookie (Scott)

Known Faculty

Scovillia Headmaster (Headmaster)

Former Students

Mala Sauce Cookie (Graduated)

Buffalo Sauce Cookie (Randy Cunningham; transferred to Fructose High)

Sriracha Cookie (Chef Hatchet; Graduated)

Creme Knights Academy

A paladin/knight school situated in the Creme Republic

Known Students

Kouign-Amann Cookie

Known Faculty

Creme Knights Preceptor (Premier)

Former Students

Financier Cookie (Graduated)

Madeleine Cookie (Graduated)

MRE Cookie (TD!Brick; Transferred to Fructose High due to being bullied for his fear of the dark)

Snowbell Academy

An academy for cookies who wish to become holiday cookies

Known Students

Stollen Cookie

Strawberry Cream Cookie

[zeus-japonicus]

What is the crew’s favorite hobby?

f........... fishing............

(but, fine, answering for what they would do in my modern AU)

Noor would go to world music concerts. Siva would do volunteer geological surveys. Baker tries to bake a new thing every weekend. Inez learns a new physical skill every time their fixation changes. Anh's a twitch streamer known for rage quitting. Alestes goes fishing.

(Anh at one point tries to be one of those Twitch people who streams their IRL fishing, except she's shit at it, and Alestes tries to sue Anh for capturing her on camera without her permission)

Also, hell yeah to the A* username, friend

[aliverse]

Betty Sinclair for the Love on Tour and Eras Tour ask!

@oneirataxia-girl also asked for Betty and u guys must be psychic bc I made this ask game specifically for her. So I'm gonna answer each separately, starting with Eras. So, Betty and her entire family goes. Aunt Dorothea braves The Great Ticketmaster War and buys tickets for herself, Betty, Betty's fathers (Ronan and Drew), and Betty's best friend Inez. As for outfits, I'm ONLY gonna answer for Betty bc that's all u asked for (aka me fishing for more asks).

Send me an OC and I'll tell you whether they went to The Eras Tour and/or Love on Tour + what they wore.

[eolande]

so much of ash's personality came to life when i was messing around figuring her out lol i'm actually having a lot a lot of fun with her.... she's a bit of a tomboy, i think she helps out at inez's alehouse when she gets older. giving lesbian vibes. a handyman and also a rare cassardi hunter, instead of fishing she opts to leave the village and hunt for other meats even if it's only small stuff like rabbits or boars. she goes up and down steps 2 at a time due to her cockiness about her physical ability she has taken many a tumble in her youth, but she stuck with it and is now very agile and sure-footed!!

[inezthefish]

My Outsiders Headcanons

Warnings: None, maybe some cursing, mention of Dally being a manwhore

Ponyboy Curtis

- He 100% has a gluten allergy or is lactose intolerant

-Trips up the stairs

-He puts ranch on everything

Sodapop Curtis

-Rip Soda you would have loved Takis 😞

-He can’t add anything past 7+4 without using his hands.

-He hates spiders and screams like a little girl if he sees one.

Darry Curtis

-Makes one of those huge, itemized shopping lists.

-Will put soap in your mouth if you say a bad word

-Type of guy to be on a date with a girl and be having a nice conversation and then it’ll just be like

Girl- “So what’s your family like?”

Darry- “Well, my parents died so now I have to raise two teens on my own, and one of them ran away when his best friend killed someone last year.”

Johnny Cade

-When Soda grows out of some clothes, Darry very discreetly washes it and gives it to Johnny.

-Hates socks that go past your ankles, like he will tweak if they are past his ankles

-Loves plants, when he grows up and gets his own house he’s gonna be one of those people with hundreds of succulents and plants in their home.

Dallas Winston

-Let’s be honest, Dallas Winston probably has a couple unknown kids because bro ejaculates and evacuates.

-Cat person. 100% had tried to bring a cat into Bucks and Buck was like “Nah dude”

-He has this one pair of boots he stole from a store that he gave to Johnny when Johnny’s tennis shoes stopped fitting him

Two-Bit Mathews

-Let’s his little sister (i headcanon her to be 5 or 6) paint his nails, the gang makes fun of him for it

-Actually fire at math but just doesn’t try

-Hates only the green apples, loves all the other ones

Steve Randle

-Has said “You can’t handle the randle” unironically.

-The amount of cavities this man has from chocolate cake and not brushing his teeth

-He definitely loves white girl music, this man can sing the whole 1989 (Taylor’s Version) set list and will do so.

[desert-bluffs-and-me]

WTNV quick rundown - 56 - Homecoming

I've decided that when it gets to around the time that the novel was released (soon!), I'm going to do a post purely about the 'main plot points/reveals' and then a secondary one of just 'cool facts I learn skimming it again'. This is for my own sanity trust me. This episode features Will Wheaton as Earl Harlan. It is autumn, and nature is vanishing. It is autumn, and nature is beautiful. Welcome to Night Vale.

In NV, the homecoming game is a literal homecoming, as in, dead citizens come home briefly for the half-time whilst the marching bands go spear hunting for dinner. Cecil is hoping to talk to his mother, especially since finding the cassettes he didn't understand and also he has become hermit-like (his words) now that Carlos isn't around and needs to get out.

His plan is jeopardised by accusations that one of the players, Malik Herrera, isn't actually real (which goes against rule 12, article 6).

Unfortunately, since his reality can't be proved until after the game would be scheduled, the whole game is forfeited and thus Cecil does not get to see his mother. To make things worse, a terrible storm rains down for five whole days, which would have resulted in a postponement of the game even if Malik was real. He's determined to be tangible, but not real post-storm. Even so, Coach Nazr al-Mujaheed and many other citizens, including Cecil, support his rights to play even if he's not real and get together after the storm to talk and stand up for him.

Malik says he doesn't even like football, but can't pursue his artist career unless the town collectively imagines it for him.

Weather: "Understood" by Y.R Generation yrgeneration.bandcamp.com

Earl Harlan has come onto the show to teach us how to make tiramisu. In NV fashion, it's a very strange version for example: eggs have teeth, organs and 'debris' in them, mascarpone is a kind of fish and nutmeg are a kind of creature which needs to be killed, cleaned and have a thick vein running up it's spine removed before it's safe to use though 'deveined' versions are available to buy. Tiramisu is also apparently quite poisonous.

Earl also reveals that he was literally 19 for many years, maybe even centuries and that he can't remember what year he graduated. Cecil also can't remember the year they graduated (which they did together, having been very close friends) even though he remembers that they stayed up late drinking a case of warm orangemilk and telling dirty jokes about the moon until the sunrise scared them off.

Earl says he all of a sudden stopped being 19 and was instead an adult with a kid, a house and a job. Cecil doesn't seem to understand, or want to understand, what Earl is actually saying.

There is a Night Vale Seismological Society, who schedule/carry out municipally-planned earthquakes. They don't really know what you're supposed to do to to keep safe during an earthquake and don't even know what's going to happen on Saturday, just that it'll be cool.

Staples encourages you to worship old gods.

The Red Mesa football team is called the Red Mesa Ant Carpenters.

There is a citizen called Inez Cordova whose son has started to walk. Teddy Williams finally rolled a 450 bowling. There are citizens called Wilson Levy and Amber Akinyi who tell Cecil a whispered story about their vacation to Luftnarp. Cecil talks to Diane Crayton about Carlos and is introduced to her son Josh (a shapeshifter) , who is first in the form of a monarch butterfly but later is a motorbike.

Nazr al-Mujaheed wears a goat-horned headpiece and comically large sunglasses. He also has tattoos of cat eyes on his eyelids.

I fell asleep easily that night. I dreamed of sun, of being with Carlos again, of a lighthouse that was not a lighthouse, of a world that is not anything at all. Perhaps a dream of things yet to come. Stay tuned next for a radio program that only dogs can hear. And as always, good night, Night Vale. Good night.

Proverb: I’ve got more rhymes than the Bible’s got Psalms. (One hundred fifty one. I’ve got one hundred fifty one rhymes.)

[casspurrjoybell-17]

HEART'S REDEMPTION - CHAPTER 21

*Warning: Adult Content* 

Sofia Walker is a fine-looking woman, no denying that. She has long black hair, large dark eyes and delicate features, a bit like a female version of Sam Asato, actually.

When Sofia’s eyes meet Ian Foley’s, he feels a spark of connection pass between them that makes his heart trip an extra beat and a tingle of warmth spread in my chest. 

Ian wonders what she looks like as a bear.

A sharp pinch to his side interrupts that line of thought and Ian looks down to see Sam glaring up at him. 

"Pay attention, idiot," he hisses under his breath.

Ian realizes, the Walkers are watching him expectantly and that someone must have asked him a question he didn't hear.

"Sorry, I missed that," he says, hoping the color in his face can be blamed on the cold.

A knowing smirk raises one side of Maria Walker's mouth. 

"I asked if you'd still like to accompany the boys on the search today," she says.

"Yes, of course," Ian replies quickly. 

"I'm happy to help in any way I can."

"Me too," Sam offers and when he draws several skeptical looks, he adds, 

"I can see things other people can't."

The four Walker cousins look at him with quickened interest and Maria regards him with a sharp, curious gaze.

"You're Gifted?" she asks.

Sam shifts a half-step closer to Ian’s side, seemingly uncomfortable under the sudden scrutiny. 

"More or less," he says. 

Ian is glad Sam kept his answer vague because something tells him the whole 'I'm a demon' story might not go over so well.

"I want to help, too," Carlos volunteers. 

"Just tell me what to do."

His easy grin and open expression dissolve whatever tension had been building in the air and Maria nods.

"Good. The more eyes out looking for Inez, the better. Come along and get some breakfast and then you can start."

Breakfast is smoked fish, golden potatoes, eggs and savory sausage. 

The table is laden with food, seemingly far more than eight people could possibly eat and Ian wonders if much will go to waste. 

His concerns prove unfounded.

Jack, Elliot, Cass, and Sofia each pack away impression portions and Ian doesn't do so bad himself. 

Sam and Carlos watch with curious fascination as the table quickly clears.

Over the meal, we learn that the Walkers, as well as a number of other Shifter families, have been searching for Inez in teams, sweeping vast areas of land each day.

"We know she made it to the airport," Sofia says, leaning over the table to reach for the coffee pot. 

"Roger said she met him at his plane and picked up the order just like she always did. He said she seemed like herself, cheerful, energetic, nothing unusual."

"That's the last anyone saw her," Cass adds around a mouthful of potatoes. "It's like she vanished into thin air."

"What about her vehicle?" Ian asks.

Elliot Walker shakes his head. 

"Not a trace. It stands out, too. Here, look."

He rises, crosses the room and takes a small, framed picture from the wall. 

Returning, Elliot hands it to Ian while Sam and Carlos move closer to get a look as well.In the photo, a woman with long gray braids stands with her arms cross, leaning against the back end of an old Ford Sun-liner, painted yellow and black.

"She loves that car," Maria says. 

"Calls it 'the Hornet.' It's hard to miss."

"I see what you mean," Ian says. 

A car like that gets noticed and remembered. 

"If it hasn't been seen, I'm inclined to think it's either been purposefully hidden or it isn't there to find."

Maria Walker nods. 

"I agree. We'd search the whole state, the whole continent, if we could, but all we can do is keeping looking here, in our little corner of the world, and hope..."

She stops, blinking eyes that look suddenly bright and Sofia leans over to rub a hand across her back.

"On that note, we'd best be going," Jack says. 

"What about it, Ian? Will you go on two legs or four?"

"Two," Ian answers with some regret. 

"My shoulder's still on the mend."

‘I'd like nothing more than to Shift with them but if I keep re-injuring myself, the bone won't heal properly.’

"What happened?" Cass asks, pointing with her fork at the sling Ian still wears.

"Just an accident," he replies. 

Revealing that Carlos hit me with a wrench would bring up too many things Ian doesn't think it would be wise to share.

Sam glances up from his glass of juice and gives Ian a very small nod.

It seems they've both noticed the Walkers might not be too keen on those with Gifts and if that's the case Ian doubts demonic possessions rank much higher.

"We'll meet you then," Elliot nods. 

"We're searching the area near the airport again today. Been over it a hundred times now, it seems but maybe you'll pick up on something we missed."

A few minutes later Ian pulls his truck around and Sam and Carlos climb aboard. 

As he prepares to pull away, Sofia approaches with a pair of small packs, which she sets in the back before leaning in to talk to Ian through the driver's side window.

"Mom packed you some provisions for the day," she says. 

"There's also a map, a compass and a radio. Cell coverage is spotty or nonexistent in this area but the radio will let you talk to us here if you find something or run into trouble."

"Thanks," Ian replies, making a conscious effort to keep his eyes on her face and away from the front of her shirt. 

"Maybe when you get back, we'll have a chance to talk," she says, smiling to reveal even, white teeth. 

"We don't get many visitors who are also bears. I'd like to hear about your clan."

"Sure. I'd like that, too." 

Ian notices that somewhere between the end of breakfast and now, a span of about five minutes, she's managed to change her clothes and put on some makeup.

 She's wearing a loose blouse that falls away from her chest as she leans down, affording me a fairly clear view of what lies beneath. 

Despite his efforts, Ian manages to take it in and he has to admit it's quite scenic. 

His sexuality used to confuse the hell out him until he realized he fall somewhere right in the middle between gay and straight. 

A fine man will always draw my eye but so will a nice pair of boobs and damn if Sofia doesn't have a nice...

"Ahem," Sam clears his throat and turns to find him glaring black fire. 

"I think we should get going, don't you?"

Sofia bends down a bit further so she can see him and frowns. 

"Of course. Good hunting out there."

Flashing Ian one more smile, she backs away and waves before turning and walking towards the house. 

As Ian watches her go, he wonders if it would cross her mind that Sam and he might be more than friends and whether or not he will need to make that clear. 

As attractive as she is, he’s not interested. 

He’s got all the heat he can handle an, judging by the way Sam is looking at him right now, possibly more.

As they drive out along the road following Jack and Elliot Walker in their beat-up old Dodge, Ian’s cell-phone rings.

He glances at the screen and sees a number he doesn't recognize but it's got his home-town area-code, so he answers.

"Ian Foley."

"Foley, it's Dane Hunter. Julian said you wanted me to call."

Ian feel the corners of his mouth dip in a reflexive frown. 

No one would mistake Dane and Ian for friends, though we'd parted amicably enough. 

Before he'd come along, some foolish part of Ian had hoped that Julian and he might still have a chance. 

Dane had proven him wrong. He'd been for Julian what he'd failed to be, a good man. 

Ian knew Dane didn't like him and he didn't blame him. 

Ian hadn't liked Dane Hunter either, though maybe that was starting to change.

"Yeah, sorry to bother you but I wanted some advice. Turns out the woman I came to Alaska to see is missing, has been for a week. I was hoping you might have some tips on what to do in such a situation." 

"Sure," he answers, his deep voice gruff. 

"Leave it to the professionals. I assume someone's filed a missing person report? Stay out of the way and let law enforcement do their job."

"That's rich, coming from a private detective," Ian shoots back before he can stop himself.

Dane says nothing and after a few seconds, Ian takes a breath.

"Sorry," Ian sighs and goes on, 

"I guess the authorities are spread a little thin right now. The family's stepping up, doing what they can themselves. I just want to help."

For a moment there's more silence and Ian wonders if he's going to be an asshole for the heck of it but finally, he speaks. 

"Okay, tell me what's been done so far."

Ian relays what he know.

"Sounds like they're on the right track," Dane says. 

"I'm afraid I don't have much to offer without being there but give me the missing woman's info and I'll do a check. See what comes up."

Ian gives him Inez Walker's name and address. 

"There's something else," Ian adds and tells him about the recent spate of deaths.

When he finishes, Dane swears. 

"Jeez, Foley. You might have lead with that. The fact that a bunch of other Shifters have turned up dead puts a different spin on things."

"Sorry," Ian says again, clenching my jaw. 

Ian knows Dane doesn't have the greatest opinion of his intellect and he doesn't blame him for that either. 

"Some people are thinking it might be a hunt, uh, a witch-hunter," Ian amended, given his name. 

"Hm. There could be something to that, actually," Dane says. 

"I had a similar case once, a few years ago. I'll look up my old files and call you back."

"Thanks, Hunter. I owe you."

There's a pause and Ian can almost see the private detective shrug. 

"Hey, Ian," Dane says, surprising him with the use of his first name. 

"Be careful. If someone is killing Shifters, specifically bears, that makes you a target. Watch your back." 

“Uh...thanks. I will."

Ian end the call and blows out a long breath. 

This trip is starting to seem like less and less of a good idea all the time.

[piasssss]

Bunny

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[foremost-of-noble-ladies]

If Wishes Were Fishes

Something I wrote. I don't even know if it's any good. Original fiction, and part of a romance novel I'm writing. It's kind of long, so I put it under the cut.

Ira was so overwhelmed at finally being in his first apartment. It was a big step for anyone, but at least he had his best friend, August with him. With just the two of them, there’d be lots of room to invite other friends over. That was a benefit he hadn't considered before. Not that Uncle Avery didn't let him have friends over, but now there were no kids underfoot. He didn't have to deal with the zoo that his uncle's house could be sometimes. 

Yesterday had been moving day, and they’d had a lot of help from both his and August’s families. Tonight, though, was the first night that they were here, in their home all by themselves. It was storming, and the rain fell heavily against the windows of the apartment, occasionally punctuated by the distant rumble of thunder.

He and August had ordered takeout and put on some dumb sci-fi movie, but Ira had something on his mind. He only poked at his pad thai idly with his chopsticks and his heart wasn't really in the movie. He looked across the second hand sofa at August. There had been something on his mind for a long time, and he was realizing that now that they were living together, they needed to talk about it.

"Hey man, if I told you something, would you keep it a secret? Even from your sister?" Ira’s heart shook as he considered what he was about to say. August Kerrigan was one of his closest friends. If Ira was going to trust anyone with this, it would be him. Besides, sometimes he got the feeling August might understand. Sometimes when they were joking around, Ira knew he'd been flirting a little, and maybe it was just wishful thinking, but it felt like August might have been flirting back.

August’s eyebrows rose, and he looked at Ira with a confused expression. August and his sister Inez were close, and Ira was friends with her too. Ever since they were small it had been the three of them and Davina, Ira’s sister.

“You’re being weird,” said August.

“Promise. You won’t tell anyone.”

“Okay. I promise.”

“Not even Inez?”

“Not even her.” August put his hand on Ira’s arm. “Please, Ira, just tell me.” The hand on Ira’s arm made him tense. Once he said what he was going to say, would August even want to be in the same room as him again, let alone touch him? Ira took a steeling breath, and put his food down on the coffee table. 

"What I'm about to say, I'm telling you because we're friends, and because we live together now, and I don’t think I can hide it anymore." He felt his heart hammering in his chest. It felt so hard to get the words out.

“Okaaaay . . .” August’s look of confusion turned to one of concern as he withdrew his hand. “Whatever it is, you can tell me. We tell each other everything.”

"I've never told anybody this, never even said it out loud to myself before." Ira was wringing his hands together, as though he could squeeze the needed words out from his fingertips. "I, uh," he stammered, his voice small and quiet like a child who feels they've just gotten into trouble. "I like . . . I like men. In a romantic way." His face burned with shame, his eyes boring holes into the new rug on the floor. If he looked at August, he knew what he would see, the fear and the hatred that would be painted on that familiar face, and he couldn’t bear the thought.

“Who is he?” August’s voice was darkened by an emotion that Ira had never heard in it before.

“Who?”

“The guy. The guy you like. I assume you’re not seeing him yet, but you want to, right? That’s why you had to tell me this? Who is he?” Was August mad at him? Ira had never heard his friend this upset. Between the two of them, Ira had always been the emotional one. August was always the rock that kept him steady.

“Why does it matter?” As Ira said the words, an explanation presented itself in his mind. He lifted his eyes from the floor at last to look up at his friend. “Are you jealous?”

Now it was August’s turn to blush. For a minute, he didn’t say anything, and Ira was afraid that he'd miscalculated. He was wrong, and August wasn’t jealous, just hurt.

“Yes.” The word fell from August’s lips sharply. “I’m jealous.”

Ira let a breath out as August finally spoke, a breath he hadn't been aware he was holding. All those years being friends, feeling a longing he didn't dare speak. August felt the same? With the last surge of his courage, Ira reached out for August's hand. Touching August felt electric, in a way touching most women never did.

"Don't be jealous." He'd wanted to hold August's hand for a long time. "There's no need." Ira wanted to say how much he cared for August, how long he'd been waiting to confess his feelings, but the situation was delicate. He didn't want to scare him away.

“What do you mean?” August brought his gaze up to meet Ira’s. Ira almost laughed. How could he not understand? 

"August, I think I love you." No, that wasn't quite right. "I mean, I know I love you, but I think I'm in love with you."

“I love you too, Ira.” August leaned in toward Ira, and Ira leaned in too. He brought the hand that wasn’t holding August’s up to cup his jaw. But it was August who closed the distance, pressing his lips against Ira’s.

Ira had tried to bury his feelings over the years. It wouldn't have done, to dwell on what he believed to be the impossible chance that August would not only understand, but also return his affection. He knew there were those out there who wouldn’t want them to be together, but August's hand in his felt right. Sitting close enough to feel August's body heat felt right. Hearing August say he loved him felt right. So how could it be wrong? 

And now, Ira had finally gotten the thing he'd most wanted for so long.

The first time Ira had wanted to kiss August had been the morning after his bar mitzvah. After the religious part, his parents had thrown him a sleepover party, and August had been among the attendees. All the boys had set up their sleeping bags in the basement rec room. Ira's was, of course, set up right next to August's. That morning after, with the rosy light of early morning filtering in, Ira looked at August and felt his heart flutter against his ribs. August was still asleep, but the way the light hit him made him look illuminated from within, and made his hair look not just blonde, but golden.

That's when Ira confirmed that he wasn't normal, something he'd already begun to suspect. And he'd imagined kissing August dozens of times since then, which had always made him feel wrong. But this  . . . this felt right.

Ira sank into the kiss, letting go of August's hand to put his own hand on the other man's back and pull him closer. Everything about this felt so much better than his imagination. On instinct, Ira felt himself sink down into the couch, pulling August's body on top of his own. There had been a voice in Ira's head for as long as he'd suspected the truth about himself. It told him that he was dangerous, perverse, defective, and a long stream of other epithets. The voice got louder when he indulged in his weakness. Now the voice was screaming at him. He was risking so much and for what?

Bliss.

Feeling the weight of August on top of him was bliss. Exploring under August's shirt, Ira's hands roaming his back, was bliss. Even the scrape of August's stubble against his face was bliss. He never wanted this moment to end. Even with his internal voice blaring warnings in his head, Ira had never felt so safe in his life. August stopped long enough for him to take a breath, but then he came right back. Ira's tongue darted out from between his lips and pressed against August's, seeking entry. He wanted to rewrite their history. All those years of shared secrets, sleepovers, summer nights camping in the backyard. He should have kissed August years ago.

The long-forgotten movie played on in the background, some giant monster tearing a city apart for no discernable reason. When they broke for air again, Ira heaved a big breath, studying the way the flickering light from the TV illuminated August's face. 

"You're gorgeous," he breathed with reverence before pulling August in for the next round. The voice in his head be damned.

“You’re perfect,” August echoed between kisses, his hips rolling against Ira’s as he shifted to be closer to him. Their fingers, lips, and tongues worked in a complex dance to explore forbidden places on each other’s bodies.

Had Ira ever really lived before this moment? Every kiss, every touch felt like Ira was becoming more and more alive. As much as he'd been told that this kind of thing was unnatural, it felt like the most natural thing in the world. At some point Ira's shirt got cast off, landing on the floor and being promptly forgotten. Did it matter? Did Ira even need clothing anymore? Or food? Or air? It felt like all he really needed was this. The two of them together, kissing and caressing each other just like this. Ira whimpered as he felt August go for the button on his jeans.

"Please, Auggie. Keep going." He closed his eyes in anticipation. He was ready. If Ira had been smarter, braver, they could have done this sooner. Should have done. Only, what Ira was waiting for never came. Instead he felt August's teeth sharp against his lip, and the mad scramble of August's limbs as they were separated from his own.

“I… We should talk about what this means.” August swallowed. “Because I can’t imagine not kissing you now that I have. But…” August let his words trail off as he reached for Ira’s hand. 

On the screen, some actor in a lab jacket and glasses frames with no lenses came up with some brilliant plan to get rid of the monster. Ira did not care. His pad thai was cold. Ira did not care. His hair was probably disheveled from being pressed up against the couch by August, and his lip felt like it might be bleeding. Ira did not care. All he cared about was August. His August.

"Auggie, I can't go back to not . . .” Ira reconsidered what he was saying. “I need to be with you." He squeezed August's hand. 

“Fuck, I made your lip bleed,” August whispered. He reached for a napkin from the coffee table before he scooted in closer and lightly pressed it to Ira’s lip. Ira had barely registered the cut on his lip. His brain had been too busy trying to think of ways to keep August and himself safe. It was his responsibility because he was the one putting them in danger. If he hadn't confessed, August wouldn't have confessed. Things weren’t as bad as they'd been in the past, but even now in 2004, it wasn’t really safe for them. Not in Texas, even in a big city like Houston.

“I love you,” said August. “That’s not going to change.” Ira let August tend to his lip, using the time to study the other man's face. When it seemed like the bleeding had stopped, Ira rested his head on August's shoulder. 

"I love you, too." It was the first time he'd said those words to someone he wasn't related to. "We'll be so careful. I promise.” The thunder outside roared spectacularly, as the storm got closer, and the lights flickered and went out. With the meager light that filtered through the storm clouds, Ira stood up and was able to light a candle so they weren’t sitting completely in the dark.

From his place on the couch, August glanced around the space as if to truly check and reassure himself that they were alone before he reached out to grab Ira by the hip. It was easy to guide Ira to him, and even easier to urge him to straddle his lap. August leaned up to take Ira’s lips in a kiss, though this one was gentler with the cut on Ira's lip. When he pulled back, August was smiling a real, genuine smile.

“Do you ever think about what it could be like if things were different? Like… Imagine if you and I could get married?” August’s question felt vulnerable.

 "If wishes were fishes . . ." Ira answered. It was something his dad used to say when he asked for something impossible. The look on August’s face told him he’d answered the wrong way. Ira lowered his face to August's neck and began kissing him again. "I'd want to, you know. Marry you. If I could."

“I’d marry you, too. In an instant, I’d marry you,” August murmured.

Something moved in Ira’s heart when he heard that. He sat up, and looked August in the eyes, his face solemn as he began to speak. His Hebrew was rusty, he hadn't been keeping up his practice since his bar mitzvah. Still, the thought he could manage.

"Baruch atah Adonai Eloheinu melech ha-olam, asher bara sason v’simcha chatan v’kallah, gilah rinah ditzah v’chedvah, ahavah v’achavah v’shalom v’reut." There was more, but he couldn't remember it all. "Blessed is the Lord God who created the universe and also joy, this couple—lover" Ira put his hand on his own chest. "And beloved.'' Ira moved his hand to rest on August's chest. "Mirth, song, delight and rejoicing, love and harmony and peace and companionship," he translated. Then, still quite serious, Ira leaned in to kiss August again, as if to marry him for real. "You are my joy. My love. My peace. You know that, don't you?"

“And you are mine,” August replied, his thumb swiping across Ira’s jaw as light as a feather. “I love you. I’ve always loved you, even if I wouldn’t let myself think it. I knew if I did, I’d never stop.” He held his gaze. “In this home, you are my husband. My love. Even if we have to lock the rest of the world out to be married, I’ll take these moments. I’ll take anything I can with you.”

Ira had never been so happy in his entire life. The litany of epithets in his head (pervert, deviant, evil, dangerous, broken, wrong) had stopped for the first time since Ira could remember. If those things were true for Ira, then they'd have to be true for August too, and they just weren't. This wasn't some tawdry affair, despite the secrecy. Ira and August were in love. More than that, they were married now, in this apartment, and in their hearts.

Ira could feel his eyes filling with tears as August said what amounted to his vows, and he could feel himself trembling as he held the tears back. Only when August called Ira his husband did they start to fall, despite Ira's smile. Ira had chosen to recite the prayer in Hebrew because the language of his people felt sacred to him, and this moment may have been the most sacred experience of his life. There was a lump in his throat, and his voice was thick with emotion when he spoke.

"I love you, August. Always. In this home, you are my husband." He leaned into his husband, his hands on the back of August's neck, foreheads together, and just closed his eyes for a minute to try and capture this feeling in his memory. He wanted to remember everything about this. How warm August’s skin was under his touch, the smell of August’s cologne, the sounds of the storm outside, and the flickering light of the candle.

"So," said Ira when he could speak again, "What can I expect for our wedding night? You'll be gentle with me, won't you?" The attempt at humor was weak, but as happy as he was, he felt like the intensity of the moment might be too much to bear for much longer.

“Can I just hold you a little longer?" August asked with a gentle laugh, stretching up to press a soft kiss to Ira’s lips. “I want you. More than anything, I want you, but when we do connect that way, I want to take our time.” He reached up to lovingly stroke Ira’s cheek with a small smile. “Can you be patient a little while longer?”

This moment was not only sacred, but incredibly private. It was something the two of them would share only with each other. The first of many things they would share only with each other. In another world, a kinder world, this wouldn't be a secret, it would be a celebration. Ira could see it so clearly in his mind. The wedding chuppah set up in Uncle Avery's back yard. August looking so handsome in a suit. Ira would be wearing a suit too, and his kippah. After their vows, the blessing he'd recited, the Sheva Brachot, would have been said in full.

It was a beautiful thought. But he could hear his father's voice in his head. "If wishes were fishes . . ."

"For you, I can wait for the end of the Earth," Ira finally answered. He'd waited this long, he could hold out a little longer. Ira curled his body into August's as best he could, and wished he were a little smaller, so he'd fit better. He wrapped his long arms around August, and laid his head as close to August's heart as possible. He listened to the steady beat of his husband's heart for a long time. At some point, he fell asleep.

The next thing he knew, August was helping him unfurl his limbs, and Ira ignored the pins and needles in them. The takeout remained abandoned on the coffee table. Ira assumed one of them would clean it up in the morning. For now, Ira let August lead him to his bedroom, help him get into pajamas and then climb into bed after him. 

“Go back to sleep, Ira.” August’s voice was as deep as the thunder outside, but far more loving. He pulled Ira in and kissed his forehead, and blissfully, Ira did as he was told.

[genderfluidcrowley]

Inez: Hey Siva, have you seen my lucky fishing hat?

Siva: I think Anh was wearing it earlier, why?

Inez: Because he caught a huge fish and I want to see if it works for me too.

Siva: I don't think it's the hat that's lucky, it's Anh's charm.