#insane that they put that on screen 👌 | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

smol-grey-tea · 3 months

Text

Secret Ending Three - Chapter Six: New Me

The one with the New Year's 👌 just the Gregorian one, not the lunar one

Before any of us even knew it, it was New Year's Eve. Things have been moving so fast though, I wonder how many years have already gone by without us even realising it. How many years worth did I spend reliving the same four months over and over? Two? Or was it even more than that? The memories are still so jumbled, I should probably just start with trying to remember how today went, then work back from there.

Right. We've been celebrating the new year all day. The boys all have a collection of New Year's greeting cards from their fans, but the only ones we have displayed are the ones from Soi and Shinbi that came in the post yesterday morning. Tei and Yeonho worked together to make a delicious rice cake soup for us all, which was probably their best dish yet.

Lance insisted on studying, even despite the holiday, and Yuri still disappeared for a while. But I'm glad that, right now, we're all gathered in the living room to watch the fireworks together. Every single one of us.

I feel so happy, I can't even put it to words... I've spent so long reliving the past, it feels like it really has been years since I've done anything like this. Time has just been repeating itself over and over again. I'm so excited for life to finally move forward once more, to finally start making new memories, enjoying new holidays together with my new family.

"I actually always hated fireworks. They're way too loud for no reason, and everyone else screams really loud when they see them too," says my bear, sitting on the floor between my legs. I run a few strands of his purple hair through my fingers while my other hand rests on his shoulder and I just can't help but smile at him sympathetically.

"I have to agree," says Lance to my right. He shifts his position between myself and Red, squished up against us both awkwardly. Red seems unbothered. "Not to mention how dangerous they are. I can't imagine actually feeling safe next to one. Just watching them on a screen like this is bad enough."

"Lance agreeing with someone?" laughed Yuri. "Well that's funny. I, for one, don't mind them too much. Quite romantic to kiss a pretty lady under."

"It won't be as romantic when you start a forest fire with them though, Yuri," Tei smirked. But it's hard not to notice how much calmer their relationship is now. Yuri just rolls his eyes in response and goes back to watching the tv. Tei hasn't even chastised him for lounging across the couch like he owns the place either.

"I've heard that they're bad for the environment too though," Yeonho says from the floor.

"Argh, you guys! You're all ruining the fun! It's New Year's, we don't have to care about that!" Red groans, throwing his fists into the air. The volume pierces my ears but it's nothing new.

"Yeah, can't we just enjoy this? For some of you, it's the first time experiencing the new year, and for me, it's been a billion years since I've celebrated anything other than Christmas. Let's just have fun today."

Everyone made sounds of agreement at that, while Red looked satisfied. Then- "It's starting!" - he exclaimed and jumped into the air abruptly, pushing Lance into me and causing a domino effect across the couch.

The countdown to midnight started and the tv showed a huge crowd of people cheering and counting along. It happened slowly and powerfully, the screen exploding with colour when the moment hit.

Everyone counted together at once, Red cheered and Yeonho clapped happily. Yuri fought to plant a kiss on my forehead while both Tei and Lance rolled their eyes. My bear covered his ears at the noise but clung onto me on the couch after all the commotion had died down.

"Happy new year, everyone!!" I'm smiling ear to ear. I'm so glad to be surrounded by family again. Even though it's been so insane (so, so insane) I think this has been the best year of my entire life.

The new year... I don't know how to feel about it. Maybe some more insane things will happen. Maybe they'll be good things, maybe they'll be bad. But I'm glad... I'll be going through it all with them. And I don't mind that at all.

When I look at everyone, I think about what we all went through together. Lance, Yeonho, Yuri, Tei, Red...and my bear too.

When I look at them all, I have the feeling that things will be okay, finally. But...there's one of them that I do worry about more than the others... He's standing in the kitchen, tidying the plates away, when I can finally speak with him on his own.

"Happy New Year," I say, still smiling, but I think he can see the hint of hesitation on my lips. He's always been able to see through people so easily, but that doesn't mean I shouldn't approach the subject without sensitivity.

He pauses to look at me, but returns to his work instantaneously, and asks with a returning kind smile, "twenty fourteen. Are you looking forward to the new year?"

"Yeah, I'm really excited! Thinking back to the start of last year, I don't think the future's looked so bright in...well, ever!"

"Bright?" He doesn't sound surprised, but I can tell, after knowing him for so long, that he disagrees.

"Yeah! 'Cause I'm going into the new year with you guys! I've never felt so safe and surrounded with love. What about you? Did you ever think, this time last year, that you'd be here?"

"Well no, my life is definitely a lot better than it was at this point last year..."

"... But..?"

He stops in the middle of cleaning and closes his eyes. He seems conflicted...

"Tei..? Are you alright..?"

"Our current situation is better, but I don't know if it's the best. It's something I've always admired about you, your ability to look at life so positively despite everything, but I can't say I agree with that worldview at all. I think it's more realistic to keep in mind all the things that can go wrong in the future."

"I was thinking you'd say that... I was worried, so I wanted to check up on you. I'm sorry I haven't asked about this sooner, but...how's this situation been affecting you? Your thoughts? It was you who suggested I choose someone, and I was wondering about how you were feeling."

I really do wish I'd have spoke to him about it sooner though; I know how hurtful Tei's thoughts can be to himself, especially if he might feel betrayed, knowing that I love everyone else as much as I love him. But I've been so preoccupied taking care of my bear, planning for the future, I just haven't had the time.

Plus...I was worried that he might not tell me the truth, even if I ask. I'm glad though, that that's not the case. I feel really thankful that he's now comfortable telling me how he feels, even if it's not good news. If he tells me what he's worried about, it'll be easier for me to help him.

Tei soon finished putting all of the plates away, then took a seat on the couch before patting the seat next to him. I eagerly sat down to listen to what he had to say.

"I can definitely understand why you'd be so happy right now. Everyone you love loves you back greatly. You were alone, and then your dolls came to life, and then you loved each of them, went through hardships, then came out the other side with all of them still loving you. You have the freedom to choose which of them you prefer."

"... Are you worried I won't pick you because you hurt me..? It's not something to worry about, I know that your thoughts aren't who you are, and you wouldn't have those thoughts at all if it were your choice, and I know about them now, so it'll be easier to-"

Tei stops me by putting a hand up. He closes his eyes and lets out a breath.

"I'm not worried about you not choosing me. I don't want you to choose me. I don't want to participate in this competition for your heart."

"Oh... I... But..."

I've been rehearsing this speech in my head for days, imagining all the different ways he might disagree, but this wasn't what I thought he'd say at all. What does he mean..??

"Tei, but... Why? It was your idea... Do you not want to?"

"I don't want you to misunderstand: I still love you. That's something that will never change. But you taught me to be honest, and...I don't think it's wise for us to be in a relationship.

"I wouldn't blame you for not choosing me over them. I'm someone who's hurt you multiple times, and you've got four, five better alternatives than this."

"But- but you can't say that's how I feel. I never said I wasn't going to choose you. I already said, your past is in the past, and you don't hurt me out of a genuine desire to hurt-"

"No, I understand that that's not what your decision is. I knew that you would be too kind, that's what I love about you.

"But I'm deciding to make the decision for you... I'm sorry, owner." He spoke sadly and sternly, but ended the last sentence looking guilty...

It does hurt to hear someone I love so much say that they don't want to be in a relationship with me anymore...but I understand that he's doing it because he loves me and wants the best for me.

But still... "Okay. So am I right in understanding that you'd still want to be in a relationship with me if you weren't a danger to me?"

"That's right... I'm sorry. But I think it's just too dangerous. I should stay away from you for now. Things seem to have gotten better for you, but..." he sighed, and spoke the next sentence quietly. "I feel like I've just gotten worse..."

"Tei..." I feel so bad for him... No, I don't blame him at all for breaking up with me. I can only imagine how he must feel right now, how hurt he must be from this. "I'm sorry we're in this position, Tei... This is such a lose-lose situation for you.

"If I choose you, you'd worry about hurting me, and if I don't, you'll worry about someone else hurting me. I don't think it's right. You're unhappy in both outcomes. Do you think you'll ever be really happy? I hope you will, even if that happiness doesn't even involve me."

"That's kind, but unfortunately I don't think it's possible. It's just something I have to live with. But please understand that you are my source of my happiness. I won't find it outside of you... Sorry."

Tei looks regretful, but there's no hesitation or surprise in his voice. This is something that he's internalised and accepted for a long time... I...don't like it. No... I hate it.

"That's not true. Don't say it like it's something normal. You shouldn't have to live with never being happy, Tei. Don't just accept it."

He sighed at my response. "Eri-"

"No. I won't let this slide. Isn't there a way? For it to stop? For the pain to go away? We can do it. Together. We can make your thoughts go away, and you'll never have to worry about hurting me again. We can do it."

"I'm sorry... I don't think this is something that can be fixed just like that. I'm a broken doll, beyond repair."

"No, you are not. You might be broken, but there's no way you're beyond repair." I can't shake the guilt and sorrow on his face when I take his hand and pledge to him my belief that he can't be helped.

"There's a lot of things that have happened since you guys came to life. Some bad things, some good things. But something I've learned is that everyone has something they think is wrong with them and they think they're beyond help. But they never are. That's never been the case, not once. They always get better.

"People always get better when they're supported with patience and love-"

"But I'm not-"

"If I'm not enough to help, then we'll just have to look for someone who is."

Tei blinks at me. "Are you... Do you mean...professional help?"

"Yeah. That's what I mean. What do you think?"

"That's... Well..." Tei rests his chin in his hand and considers this... I think it's cute watching his eyes fix on one point of the couch as the thoughts start turning in his brain.

But he shakes his head with a frown and says, "Ah, no, what would they even do? The worst case scenario is that they'd take me to prison or a mental hospital because I might hurt someone."

"But the best case scenario is that the treatment works and you get better and will feel happy when you think about the future. Even if it might go wrong, don't you think it's worth the risk? Don't you wanna try, just in case?"

Tei sighs, not wanting to meet my determined eyes. In the time that he hesitates, we're interrupted by the sound of the bathroom door opening. The smell of shampoo fills the air.

Red steps into the living room with a yawn, stretching in his pyjama bottoms. "Hm? You guys are still up? I thought the celebrations were over, it's like two in the morning."

"Aha, yeah, we'll go to bed soon. We were just talking about..."

"Oh, like a human birth certificate? I have one of them," Red said plainly.

"How it's difficult to do certain things because we don't have real identification. Some things, no matter how much we want to do them, might just be impossible without proof of our human existence."

Oh, ID. I assume Yuri just bribed someone to let the boys into the school, but for the doctors, I'm guessing it might be a bit more difficult, since they might be confused about why the boys don't have any medical history. And it's not like we can get Crobi Doll to give the boys ID.

"No, Red, we mean a real one," said Tei.

"Yeah, that's what I have."

"... Did you forget to take your brain with you into the new year?"

"No, I really have one!" he huffed and stormed off into his room. He was gone for a moment and came back soon with a document in his hand. "See? I have a real one. Except it says I was born in nineteen ninety five."

"Red... What?? Where did you get this?? When??" I pleaded with him, unable to perceive the reality of the paper in my hands.

"Ehh... Yeah, about that. I never brought it up 'cause there was never a good time...but the nice lady at the Crobi Doll shop in town gave this to me."

"... What?? When were you planning on telling me this??"

"Hey, it's not like it was a secret!! I was gonna tell you, but then you were sick, and then there was the play, and then there was Christmas, and then you disappeared, and then I forgot about it!!"

"How do you forget that Crobi Doll know that you came to life??"

"Uh, I don't know... Is it bad?"

"No," said Tei. His eyes are fixed on the birth certificate. I think I see a hesitant smile playing on his lips. Is that hope I can see on his face? "This can only be good news."

#my post #cheritz #nameless the one thing you must recall #hope you like

1 note · View note

the-blair-witch-reject · 2 years

Note

maybe this is not helpful since i am a annihilation movie hater but by god the book is so much better like if you love story’s about this being inescapable about compulsion pulling you down into the hole that will be your grave about towers that descend deep into the earth and most importantly about how everyone has lesbian thoughts sometimes than u need to read it there are some moments of horror in that book that can never be put to film because of inherent differences in the media. also though the skull bear in the movie is so good tho so it has its moment 4 me. also if you like insane sci-fi than read friday black it’s a fantastic short story collection ♡

kk hope u r having a nice day byeeeeeeeee

I absolutely have to read it now cause all of that sounds amazing! I’ve noticed that sci-fi books are the hardest to translate to the screen so the books are almost always better. And thanks for the recommendation I’ll check that out too 👌

#answers

0 notes

silversanimewhump · 2 years

Text

Banana Fish Whump List

Summary: Nature made Ash Lynx beautiful; nurture made him a ruthless killer. A runaway forced into prostitution by "Papa" Dino Golzine as a child, Ash, now seventeen and head of his own gang, goes up against Dino, intent on destroying everything in his empire. But the hideous secret that drove Ash's older brother mad in Vietnam enters the scene, and sets off a chain of events that no one saw coming.

Where to watch: Amazon prime and wcostream

*Warning: remember that this list will have major spoilers. Also, though this anime is known to be a bl, for those who prefer platonic Whump as I do, it can be viewed that way.*

Whumpee: Ash Lynx

Highly intelligent, incredibly skilled in combat, excellent leadership, and a determination that knows no bounds, Ash is a very capable young man. He’s the stoic/defiant type of Whumpee, and has one of the most tragic backstories I’ve ever seen. Very Whumpable 👌

List below

(All rape is off-screen)

Ep1: meeting with past abusers, fighting, friend kidnapped.

Ep2: punched, beaten, hit with a belt. Threat of rape. Slammed to wall, punched. Friend killed. Framed, handcuffed. Video of past sexual abuse revealed/played. Sent to prison.

Ep3: fighting, thrown in solitary. Raped, bruised.

Strangled.

Ep4: threat of rape. Beaten, kicked in the gut, strangled, threat of rape. Finds out brother is dead, punched.

Ep5: shot in the shoulder.

Ep6: returning to place of bad memories. Past repeated rape. Loved one killed, father shot.

Ep7: nothing

Ep8: friends taken. Handcuffed, groped, pistol whipped, kicked in the stomach, captured.

Ep9: objectified, forced ear piercing. Chained, cut on neck, crying, forced to kill best friend.

Ep10: implied torture (it’s off-screen), he’s been cut on chest and arms. Fighting, sees best friend’s partially dissected corpse, freaks out, crying.

Ep11: crying, feeling guilty.

Ep12: self-hating, facing a past fear.

Ep13: fighting, kicked, shot at, shot in the shoulder, cut in the side, collapsed.

Ep14: blood loss, nightmare, assassination attempt (almost poisoned), torn stitches, kidnapped.

Ep15: drugged. Grabbed by the shirt, lifted up and dropped, threatened (by past abuser).

Ep16: big arm strain, groped.

Ep17: stalked, shot at.

Ep18: finds out dangerous person is after him, shot at. Intent to kill himself to save friend, giving up future, cut on neck, punched in the face, spit blood, elbowed hard in chest, begging, forced to take from friends, captive.

Ep19: forced to help enemy, feeling so much guilt that he feels sick, kissed by Whumper, drugged (it takes his sight), collapsed, weak, unable to keep food down (referenced). Lifted up by shirt, thrown down, getting bad news, having a fit (moment of insanity), kicked in the face, punched in the face a few times

Ep20: cant see, in a wheelchair, knife put to throat. Punched in the gut, tied up. Friends held hostage.

Ep21: confronting past abuser, reminded of past trauma (referenced recorded rape). Shot at, crashing through a window, forced to surrender to the enemy.

Ep22: tied up, rope around neck, punched, kneeling, strangled with the rope, pushed to the ground, groped, raped, kicked, had water dumped on him, lifted up by the hair. Friend getting shot to protect him, shot in the side.

Ep23: bandaged, collapsing, nightmare. Worried for friend.

Ep24: trapped, bound, pistol whipped, head stepped on. Shot at, shot in the side, kicked, strangled by bar held against throat, throat grabbed, stabbed, knife wiggled as it went in, pulling knife out, gun held to head. Stabbed, killed.

Let me know if I missed anything or messed up

If you’d like another character done, my ask box is open

#Banana Fish #Ash Lynx Whump #Hurt Ash Lynx #Whump #Anime Whump #Anime Whump List #Whump list #Whumplist #SilverWhumpList

91 notes · View notes

lover-of-skellies · 3 years

Note

if reqs are still open, geno + reaper 💋?

Gotcha, broseph👌

Reaper:

Your first kiss with him was honestly kind of a miracle. It shouldn't have worked, but it did, and you were at a complete loss

Reaper had begun appearing around your workplace a while ago, and over time, you'd had more and more encounters with him. Most people couldn't even see him, and those that did were usually dying. You and Reaper had become friends somehow, which at first, seemed too good to be true. Over time, you grew more comfortable with it, and by then, the god of death made it a point to pop in for a quick visit every other day, as often as he could. He didn't understand the concept of human holidays and traditions all that well, and he didn't participate in many of them, but he'd made an exception last year. It had been Christmas and he'd gifted you a necklace, explaining that it was very important that you never lose it, and of course, you promised to keep it close

He'd then caught you totally by surprise, having put down his scythe and moving closer to wrap his arms around you. You'd understood that his touch normally caused death, so when you found that the hug didn't kill you, you were nothing short of amazed. He told you it was because of the necklace he'd given you, and it was then that you understood why it was so important to him

Your first kiss happened on a warm, summer night. It was far too humid and muggy for comfort, so you'd put on your necklace and proceeded to cuddle up to the god of death, enjoying his cold touch. The two of you had sat in comfortable silence for a while and you'd become cozy where you were, tucked against his side with your head on his shoulder. Your eyes were closed, and you smiled to yourself, visibly content. Reaper had watched you for a few minutes before softly asking if he could try something. You'd grown to trust him completely, so without hesitation, you gave him permission, your eyes remaining closed as you relaxed

Needless to say, you weren't expecting to feel his teeth pressing against your lips. You were surprised, but you allowed it, your cheeks quickly heating up as a result. His kiss was gentle, and despite it being almost as cold as his touch, it made you feel warm inside. It'd been so long since he'd been able to touch anyone, let alone kiss them, so he was overjoyed when you began to kiss him back

Geno:

Your first kiss with him was a complete surprise. It wasn't anything you'd been expecting, and it wasn't anything you'd ever thought would happen in the first place. He always seemed some level of sad or irritated, and you'd learned not to pry. After a while, all you asked was if there was anything you could do to help him. There usually wasn't, but he enjoyed your presence anyway. After being in the save screen by himself for so long, he was grateful to have you around him as much as you were

Back when you'd first met him, he was grumpy and pessimistic. He still defaulted to being pessimistic, of course, but as the days passed by, he seemed to become less and less grumpy. Geno actually seemed content. Sometimes you'd catch him smiling, even. Whenever you'd asked what he was smiling about, he'd either dismissed the question entirely or stubbornly refused to answer. That didn't bother you, but you'd be lying if you said it didn't make you insanely curious

Something you'd learned about him pretty quickly was that he hated being alone, and he always needed some sort of background noise. Complete silence and isolation gave him anxiety, and in turn, the anxiety made him irritable and more likely to lash out at people. You couldn't even recall how exactly your friendship with him had even started, since he'd never been a fan of socializing. All you could remember was him walking into your life one day, and that was that

Geno hated to admit it, but sometimes... Sometimes, he was fragile. Sometimes he needed a little extra help, and sometimes he struggled with things more than others. You were patient and understanding, and without making a big deal out of anything, you'd decided to start helping him with things more often. Usually you'd jump in to help at random, which was confusing to him for a while, but he slowly adjusted and grew used to it

Your first kiss with him happened one evening when you were at his house. He was feeling a bit more fragile than normal, so you insisted that he rested as much as possible. You made sure he was drinking water, and once the household chores were done, you'd went ahead and started preparing dinner for the two of you. When the food was done and the table was set, you called out to Geno to let him know that the food was ready. You heard him grunt in acknowledgment, followed by the sound of shuffling movement. He's entered the kitchen and you directed him to his seat at the table, where you'd already had a plate of food waiting for him. He awkwardly thanked you for your help, and then both of you fell silent as you ate your dinner

When you'd both finished, you asked if he wanted anymore. He declined, and then became quiet again as you stood from your seat. You gathered your now dirty dishes, and then moved around to where he was sitting to collect his dishes too. He waited for you to reach for them before he snagged the front of your shirt and tugged you down, so you were closer to him. You let out a tiny squeak in surprise and asked if everything was ok, and that's when he decided to kiss you

It was a bit of a shock, and you felt your face grow hot almost immediately. Despite your surprise and embarrassment, you kissed him back. As you broke away from it, he mumbled against your lips, giving you another thanks for your help

#anon #asks #headcanons #reaper sans #geno sans

50 notes · View notes