#interacting with the internet these days gives me so much empathy for toddlers

[sing-you-fools]

I love when I search for something and the search function is like "hey I'm not gonna tell you this but I went ahead and included a bunch of relevant terms in the search for you, too! we'd hate for you to miss anything!" like wow the internet is so good now right?

what I searched: Freddie Purrcury

what I got: a whole fucking lot of monarchy memorabilia

[drummergirl231-2]

Happy Autism Awareness/Acceptance Day 2020!

To me, true awareness and acceptance go hand-in-hand. I still don’t mind the word “awareness,” since most people, even people who think they’re spreading Autism awareness, aren’t totally aware of what it is or what it’s like. But I also love calling it Autism Acceptance Day, because that’s what we need more than anything. 

To spread some awareness, I’d like to address some misconceptions about Autism and share some other thoughts I wish people knew/understood.

1. Autists/Aspies do not lack empathy. 

I found this thing and it explains it super well so I’ll just leave it here:

Imagine a scenario where you say something totally innocent and it triggers the person you’re talking to. They start flying off the handle at you and you don’t know why. But because they’re angry, you are, too. But since you don’t know why they’re angry, you don’t know why you’re angry, either. It’s crazy overwhelming and confusing. And you want to fix whatever you did because you don’t want this other person to be angry or hurt, but you don’t know how, because their all-consuming rage makes it really hard to think and try to put yourself in their shoes. Also, you’re scared on top of it all.

That’s what having high affective and compassionate empathy and low cognitive empathy is like. It’s not that we don’t care. It’s that we care too much, and all the super specific nuances of socializing are things we have to learn one at a time, through either our mistakes or others’ mistakes. These things don’t come naturally to us, but it’s not like we can’t learn. If I were to compare math to socializing, it’s like you all have calculators or other doohickeys to do all the math for you and we just have paper and a pencil... and no eraser. 

2. Autism is not a mental illness to be “cured.”

Now don’t get me wrong, I am ALL FOR people finding ways to help us be able to deal with the world better, whether that’s a better diet, items to block out sensory stimuli or items that stimulate, or counselling that can help us navigate social situations and talk through anxiety and/or depression. But those things don’t “cure,” us because Autism isn’t a disease or something wrong with us. Autism gives us different challenges, sure, but neutotypicals have their own challenges. 

The symptoms typically associated with “low-functioning,” Autism don’t necessarily have to be a part of Autism. Many non-verbal kids grow up to be verbal. That doesn’t mean they stopped being autistic. There was a celebrity mom years ago who claimed to “cure” her son’s Autism with a gluten-free dairy-free diet. He’d been so trapped in his head, he couldn’t engage with the world around him. She altered his diet and one day he laughed at Spongebob, and that was a turning point. He became able to interact with people and react to things on TV. It was a huge breakthrough. But he was still autistic. If you were to have plopped me down on a rug as a toddler next to a toddler like this celebrity’s son before his altered diet, you wouldn’t think I was autistic at all by comparison. But I was, and I am.

Autism is a different neurological blueprint, and yes, brain-healthy diets and detoxes can do wonders for us because it seems like our brain type does make us more susceptible to negative effects from neurotoxins. But if you think someone has lost their Autism just because “the bad parts,” went away... no. That’s not how it works.

3. Not everyone is “a little autistic.” 

When I was newly diagnosed and trying to process it, someone told me something along the lines of, there there, we’re all a little autistic. But that’s not true. There are a lot of traits associated with this brain type, and yes, a neurotypical person can have a few of them. That doesn’t make them a little autistic. To be considered autistic at all, you’d have to have a large number of quirks plus social delays (not associated with excessive technology use), odd or repetitive behaviors, unusual and intense interests, communication struggles, and unusual sensory processing. Suppose you’re white. If you are white, this should be easy to imagine. Say an African American just told you about some of the challenges they’ve faced, whether it’s race-based bullying in school or racial profiling later on. Would it be appropriate to say, “There there, we’re all a little black?” NO. One, it’s false. Two, while all people struggle with stuff because to be human is to struggle sometimes, the struggles of different groups of people are totally different, and you can’t say you know exactly what it’s like or pretend everyone’s the same. We all have equal dignity and worth, but beyond that, everyone’s different. Don’t pretend differences don’t exist. Just value them.

4. Autism doesn’t have a “look.”

When I tell people I’m autistic, this is usually what I hear: “Wow! I wouldn’t have guessed! You don’t look autistic.”  ...What does that even mean??? Is it supposed to be a compliment? Because if it’s a compliment I “don’t look autistic,” then that’s kind of an insult to other autistic people. Or do they mean it like, “I don’t believe you’re really autistic because I have a preconceived idea of what an autistic person looks like and you don’t fit the bill so I’m not going to give you grace if you act weird?” I don’t know. Y’all say weird things too, sometimes, ya know? But Autism doesn’t have a look. There is a sort of distant intensity in our gaze sometimes... and I can legit see it when Jim Parsons plays Sheldon Cooper, but when I see an interview with him as himself, it’s gone. It’s not a fixed feature of our faces, and a talented NT could totally put it on.

5. Autism presents itself differently in boys and girls.

You know how not a lot of people know the symptoms of heart attacks in women because mainly people only talk about what a heart attack is like for men? It’s kinda like that with Autism, too. Typically when you hear about Autism, you’re hearing about the signs and symptoms in boys. Even most pediatricians only know to look for the way it presents in boys, which is how so many girls don’t get a diagnosis until later in life, if ever.  One difference is that, for whatever reason, girls tend to be better at nonverbal communication and taking hints. We’re mimics. Chameleons. We take on the mannerisms of those around us and who we see on TV as we force ourselves to adapt. Verbal boys might speak at unusual volumes or with an unusual voice, rhythm, or cadence, but verbal girls learn to mimic the speech patterns of others. Our special interests/obsessions aren’t typically seen as strange given our age and sex. For example, a six-year-old autistic boy might be fascinated by WWII. I was interested in fetal development. People thought, “What’s so weird about that? She’s a little girl who loves babies.” We often play with Barbies or other dolls long after our peers have stopped. It helps autistic girls process social situations. When I was shamed out of liking Barbies, I started writing stories in notebooks or in my head. Autistic boys usually struggle with social communication from an early age, but autistic girls usually don’t have any major communication struggles until adolescence, when relationships, platonic or romantic, get way more complicated.  Since little autistic girls can mimic their neurotypical peers, and since some doctors only know how to look for Autism in boys, we tend to fly under the radar, causing that huge gender gap in diagnoses.

6. Mental illness is common with Autism, but NOT part of it.

I read an article by an autist in the UK who struggles to get help for his anxiety or depression because therapists have brushed him off, saying “Well, that’s just part of being Autistic, so it can’t be helped.” NO! Just like neurotypicals can be mentally healthy or unhealthy, Autistic people can be mentally healthy or unhealthy. Just because something is common for us doesn’t mean it’s how it’s supposed to be, or that it’ll always be that way, or that it’s part of who we are and we need to embrace it. People with mental illnesses should be embraced (literally or figuratively, depending on what they’re comfortable with). Mental illnesses should not be embraced. Ever. Because autistic kids and adults often face abuse, bullying, discrimination, and are ostracized, anxiety (especially social anxiety) and depression are common for us. In more serious cases, especially in autistic teens and young adults, dissociative disorders can develop. What’s worse, it doesn’t take much looking to find the dark corners of the internet where people, autistic or not, are encouraged to embrace their developing dissociative thoughts and feelings. I once saw an interview with someone who found healing from a dissociative disorder, and she gets emails every day from others with the same disorder she had who regret some of the things they were talked into doing while living with the condition and  who want to find the healing she did. She said many of them are autistic and under the age of twenty-five. Autistic people with mental illnesses shouldn’t be talked into believing their mental illnesses are a part of them, or not mental illnesses at all, or something to celebrate and cling to. I reject the notion we should have to settle for being ill in any way. We deserve to be as healthy and whole as anyone else, and it makes me sick there are so many internet predators preying on us in this way, and that there are therapists who think Autism and mental illness has to be a packaged deal.

7. If LGBT people were treated the way autistic people are by the media, it’d lead to outrage. But it seems like no one is outraged on our behalf.

We’ve seen the news stories, haven’t we? A couple invites the news over to their house, upsetting their autistic child who then has a meltdown, the meltdown is filmed and aired, and the parents are just like, “This is what our life is like because of Autism. And it sucks. Pity us.”

There was one video I saw... I’m just so enraged by it, even after two years. A mother was praised for her open honesty as she vilified her autistic son and complained about how he ruined her life and how hard it is to go out and have people stare. I’m sorry, hard for WHO??? I don’t even want to go into the details. I know only sharing this much doesn’t make it sound like that bad of a video, it’s just... ugh. Guys. It’d be a whole separate post. I can’t deal with it right now. 

If parents went on the news after their kid came out to them as gay, and wept and begged for pity and said some of the things this woman said of her autistic son (wondering what she did wrong that made her deserve this or that led to this or saying she doesn’t believe in God but finds herself praying anyway that God’ll “fix him”), America would call them the worst parents ever. But parents of autistic kids who do this are praised for their openness and vulnerability as they publicly shame their child.

Another time, after a mass shooting carried out by a teenage boy, the news reported that he was autistic and that might have contributed to the attack (there they go, combining mental illness with Autism as one and the same again).

If a pedophile were arrested, and they said on the news, “And we just got word that he’s gay, so that may be why,” there’d be a riot. But the news can pin autists as mass murderers and no one bats an eye!

All of May last year working at a clothing store, I watched as various departments filled up with pride t-shirts to get ready for June, and I couldn’t help but think,

Where were the Autism acceptance t-shirts in March to get ready for April?

I probably shouldn’t be so surprised with the media painting us as life-ruiners and life-enders. 

I know it’s a vile and disgusting thing for me to be jealous of LGBT people in this way, especially since they have their own struggles, too. I just wish society had our backs and celebrated us instead of wanting us “fixed,” for their own convenience, ya know?

8. Almost all of us hate Autism Speaks, and those who don’t are probably just new. XD

I used to be all “Light it up blue!” as well (even though that seemed weird to me, given blue lights might be overwhelming to some people on the spectrum). But then I read something on their site that made me feel really betrayed, and down the line, I learned most autistic people hate them... some because they saw them say the opposite of what I saw they said. Basically we all have different opinions but Autism Speaks spouts whatever information their donors want them to (sellouts), and that donated money doesn’t go towards helping us, but toward more fundraising or research on how to prevent people with our brain type. I guess they’re not fond of the artistic and scientific advancements we bring to the table. They should change those puzzle pieces from blue or multi-colored to white with black specks because they want a world that’s vanilla. 

9. Some of us still like the puzzle pieces, even if we hate Autism Speaks.

I’ve talked about this in a fanfic, but I’d love it if we could redeem the puzzle pieces, because they’re still a good analogy if you assign a different meaning. Autists and NTs are puzzling to each other, no sense denying that, but the more time we spend together, the more we start to understand each other. Also, Autism does have a lot of pieces, and figuring out I was autistic was like solving the puzzle of my life. The missing pieces came together and things became clearer and made more sense. Also also, some autistic people are really good at puzzles. And then there are autists like me who aren’t necessarily good at puzzles, but get totally absorbed in working on them anyway (my parents have been doing some puzzles during the quarantine lol they’re traps! TRAPS I SAY!!!).

Nevertheless, I understand why other autistis don’t like the puzzle pieces and prefer the rainbow infinity symbol, and I quite like it, too. It’s very pretty, and the way the colors fade together is a nice symbol of how it’s a spectrum.

It’s a sign of the infinite possibilities in our lives when we’re empowered, because we can do and have done good and great things in the world.

[self-loving-vampire]

@melancholygirlfrien said:

I have a Child Development Associate so I am literally professionally certified to tell you that yes, taking children and babies to places so they can learn how to function and see that they're a part of a world bigger than they are, is important to their social, emotional, and language development. It helps everything from motor skills to social skills and cognition Just because you find babies' cries annoying doesn't mean parents are selfish just for wanting to take their children outside. Children shouldn't be raised indoors all day in a fucking bubble because that's how developmental issue happen. If a child is isolated they can develop serious issues.

Note that there are more appropriate places you could be taking them to, for starters. Places where people can avoid the noise more easily and where it might be less disruptive.

Like, you have options beyond “indoors 100% of the time” and the kinds of locations I mentioned in my first reply to you. Like, you can still take them to places like parks, malls, and other locations where it would be less of an issue.

No it's not fucking self centered for a parent to take their baby outside because they're just doing what they gotta do , not everyone can afford child care especially people of lower socioeconomic status. There are many single mothers who have no other option but to take their baby everywhere because that's what their situation calls for. The only fucking person being self-centered and not considering the struggles of other people is you.

Again, notice the kinds of places I mentioned in my post before going off on straw arguments. My complaints about others involve places like restaurants, the movies, and airplanes.

These are not only places where a child crying can ruin other people’s experience and be inescapable, they’re also places where many of the people there are not poor and had other options for what to do about their situation.

Like, I would think differently about someone who brought their baby to a clinic’s waiting room (for example) as opposed to a flight to Miami.

Black and white thinking is not going to help you understand what other people’s issues are.

No I wouldn't tell someone whos scared of my snake to go suck it, even though I would have every right to. Like I said I understand when people have phobias of certain animals. There might be people out there who have a phobia of dogs but does that mean people who take out their dogs are being selfish and don't care about people who have trauma/phobia associated with dogs?? Fuck no, those people are just being responsible dog owners and doing what every dog owner should which is take their dog out for a walk. Just bc some people might be annoyed by their dog doesn't mean they're being self-centered and bad people.

And yet there are places where they probably should not take their dog because it would be either inconsiderate or outright banned, and if they insisted on doing so then they probably are self-centered.

Like, if you want to take your babies out for a walk or something around the house that’s not nearly as bad as what I was actually complaining about.

your life isn't gonna be fucking ruined from hearing a baby cry in public. The most you'll be is annoyed and anxious for a few moments and then it will go away. Suck it up.

Did I ever say anyone’s life was going to be ruined? Why do you make everything some kind of exaggerated strawman?

Here are some exact quotes you already forgot about:

“It’s not the worst thing but it’s still kind of inconsiderate“

“No one said anything about stopping them or suspending their rights in any way, only that noise is annoying (and especially painful to autistic people with sensory issues).“

“Um… what do you think I do? Activate Karen Mode and go bother the parents about it? Nah, I just judge them silently. I am free to complain as much as I want on the internet though.“

So:

1- I am not treating it as a huge, life-ruining thing, just a sort of dick move. Like people who cut in line or something.

2- I do “suck it up” when it happens but am 100% allowed to complain about it online anyway.

Tbh I can't keep talking to you, I think people like you should be ushered into a dark warehouse and humanely put down.

Empathy-havers are so humane they advocate genocide against autistic people apparently, over a post about baby noises being kind of annoying. I’m not even surprised because you all keep doing this every single time without even thinking about how it sounds.

Maybe you should think about how the things that make children annoying (they're egotistical, they have a hard time empathizing with  others because of their self-centered world view) are traits that you have yourself. The difference is that most children develop and grow out of that self-centered world view

If you actually read my post, the primary annoyance I pointed out was that they were Portable Sensory Hell. I made no comment about their ability to feel empathy and actually find low empathy people significantly less annoying than others so that’s clearly not it.

You're a child in my eyes tbh. Your mentality is childish. Say what you will but I would like to remind you again, at one point in your life, you were a baby, and you shit your pants, and someone had to clean up all that shit after. Or else you wouldn't be here.

You know, if you’re going to go around advocating genocide over a post about people not liking baby noises then I am 100% sure my literal child self was morally and intellectually superior to your current self already.

You know what would make me respect you more? If you owned up to the fact that you judging parents when their babies cry is a result of your low empathy and self-centered world view. I would respect you SO much more if you just said "Yo, straight up. I'm just a selfish person. I know babies can't help that they cry and it's not the parents fault but I straight up do not like that shit. I have low empathy as a person and therefore I can't really bring myself to care about babies, children, or the parents and their situation so I just judge parents because I want to. Because their kid is annoying the shit out of me. I don't care about the reasoning tbh I'm just kind of an asshole."

> Implying I care about whether or not you respect me.

Also, this isn’t even correct. At my current point in life I pretty much never have to interact with babies in any way, if I was completely selfish then it would not matter to me now whether or not people bring their crying babies into airplanes and the like. The issue just isn’t a very significant part of my life.

But the thing is that while I am low empathy that does not change the fact that I value other people’s well-being and know that crying babies make their lives worse even if just in a small, temporary way.

The kinds of parents I am complaining about don’t even think about that.

You know you're just incompassionate. So be a self-respecting sociopath and own up to that shit, please, I would respect a stone cold evill mf  SO much better than a little weasel who tries to give excuses as to their own egocentric way of thinking.

I am a narcissist, not a sociopath. Of course, if cluster B disorders are just standard insults to you then you might think all low empathy conditions are the same.

Furthermore, you haven’t shown that you understand anything at all about what low empathy conditions are actually like.

Also I find it really telling that you would prefer unrepentant evil selfishness over someone who merely understands and sides with others who are negative about loud babies. Like, actual morality is not something you seem to be valuing here.

"iF I wErE iN tHaT sItUaTiOn I wOuLd jUsT sTaY hOme!" No you wouldn't you stupid bitch because parents have to go out to buy groceries, and run errands like every other adult.

Again, you seem to be treating all of “outside the house” as an interchangeable space with the exact same norms.

Like, do you realize how it might be different to bring your child out for necessary grocery shopping than to bring them to a restaurant or the movies? Do you really think I would treat those things as exactly the same?

MOST parents, especially working-class, poor, or single parents, DON'T have that option, as I already stated. And you are showing a clear lack of regard for people who are in a tougher situation than you for judging parents when their babies annoy YOU. You are literally not putting yourself in their shoes at all bc you have no idea of even half the shit parents have to do in order to make ends meet and look after their babies.

Oh, I am well aware of how having babies will multiply your suffering, especially if you’re poor. It’s precisely why I’m never having any! 

I understand it’s a huge pain and people with children are always going on and on about how their lives became significantly more miserable as a result of it.

I think you should honestly love that screaming toddler on the plane because in a few decades she might grow up to become the nurse who will take care of you when you're old and ill.

This argument just doesn’t work one way or another. If the baby is going to help me then I will be grateful once that actually happens, not based on a hypothetical so unlikely I might as well live my life not considering it.

[ocular-intercourse]

A1, C1-3-5, E4, G3-5, M:2, N:1-2, Y:5 for anyone or everyone as you wish 👀✨

Ahhh thank you so much!!! I can’t limit myself to a sentence or two, that took a while 😂

1. whatare your oc’s natural abilities, things they’ve been doing since young?

Finn | Captivating.He’s always been the kind of person that just attracts other people’s attention.His friends flock around him, listen to him above others, adapt to hisinterests.. So far three of his Canadian friends have followed him to live in Americawithout him actively influencing them to do so. Something about him drawspeople in and rarely lets them go again.

Asher | Charming.Nowadays it’s just a tool to manipulate people in the right moments, but Asherhas always had it easy to make others feel at ease and appreciated and make hispresence seem desirable enough to make others want to please him. The moneyprobably does not hurt, but it is also just a mixture of his looks and aninnate ability to read other people and their preferences.

Teddy | Empathy.He was the kind of toddler that would go to another kid that was crying and hugthem or give them his toys or food to make them feel better. He is alwaysattentive to the moods of the people around him and will do his best to makethem feel better. But it also works the other way around, a person’s negativeemotions affect him very easily and can very much ruin his day.

Ace | Disappearing.He grew up in an apartment that was hardly big enough for one person let alonetwo, with a brother that might smack your head or send a swig of cold wateryour way out of nowhere to test your instincts. He always found easy ways tohide himself or to minimize his presence, to make himself seem inconspicuous &imperceptible.

1. howdo they sit in a chair? 

 What a question, i love it, it’s one of these things you have never really thought about but somehow still know the aswer to cause your OCs just tell you.

Dependson the chair & setting.

Finn |Fairly regular on usual chairs, somewhat fidgety, shakes his leg almostconstantly, does not like to sit for long periods. On armchairs or sofas hetends to pull up his legs, despite his height he tends to make himself remarkablysmall, curled up in childlike comfort.

Asher |Well behaved. Sits straight, feet on the ground, would never put his elbows ona dining table.  Might slouch in privatesituations. In worse mental states, when he does not have to hide it, sitscompletely hunched over, shoulders high up, head hanging low, even hidden.

Teddy | Messy,at least one feet off the ground at all times, sometimes two, restless,unhealthy positions, all over the place.

Ace | Delinquent,sits on them the wrong way around or tipping the chair back, balancing on twolegs, clearly cool & chill. Manspreads.

3. whatis their ideal comfort day?

Finn | Aroundhis close friends, cooking for them, eating together, just talking & listeningto music till late in the night.

Asher | Somewhereout of reach of his father. That’s pretty much it. In another country, in amuseum or a good restaurant, escaping his life for a second or two.

Teddy | Anythingin nature, hiking, camping, picnicking with Zeke maybe sneaking a kiss or two.Alternatively time with his family in any capacity.

Ace | Lockinghimself in his room and working on music all day, alternatively chillingtogether with Ben or Ellie, not even talking just being together each doingtheir thing, no demands on him having to interact unless he feels like it.

5. whois the best at comforting them when down?

Finn | Shawn,always. No one can calm Finn down like he does. He does not really know why Shawnmakes him feel so safe, might have to do with them going through so much shittogether, it bonded them really damn hard. They are completely on onewavelength. Shawn has also seen Finn in some of his worse moments and haslearned to pick up on Finn’s insecurities, and how to make him come back toreality when he gets himself worked up over something, or nothing, before hestarts to spiral. Similar experiences let Shawn find the right words to makeFinn feel better. If he’s not being especially resistant to help, which doeshappen from time to time.

Asher | Asheris pretty much a hopeless case at being comforted, it just bounces right offhis pessimist paranoia, and if someone manages to make him feel better he justfeels guilty about bothering them, or allowing them to get closer, or even allowing himself to feel better…The only ones ever even trying to comfort him are Devin or May. Devin wins thefirst place by sheer perseverance. He will make Asher feel better, noalternates allowed! Asher is learning to let him.

Teddy | Hisbigger brother. Brad is the undying optimist in the family, and that sayssomething when you know Teddy. When Teddy loses hope, which happens rarely,Bradley can easily remind him of the things he should focus on. He is also oneof the very few people that know about the darker spots in Teddy’s past orpersonality, and therefore has the insight to figure out the real problems.

Ace | Ben.Dale might comfort him in some ways, but not by actively trying to, or at leastnot showing it. Ben on the other side takes the time to listen and observe andpoke till Ace opens up, but he practically has to be forced to, since he doesnot like showing emotions and even less his flaws. Another candidate, if youmight call it that, is quite simply his mother’s domain, the night. If he feelsdown he just lies in the moonlight for a while, staring at the sky, andstrangely feels better in no time.

4. arethey up-to-date on the internet fads?

Finn | Yes.If you’d told him two years ago he would not have believed you. Growing up athome his parents very much had the attitude that he should either be doingsomething ‘worthwhile’ or at least spend time in the fresh air. He did not growup watching a lot of tv or playing video games, or using the internet, withexceptions of when he was visiting his friends. In many ways he is just nowstarting to make up for the youth he spent on the street or taking care of hisalcoholic father. It is pretty much necessary for him to have a presence on allthe trendy platforms to further his career. What has really been sticking withhim is streaming video games, as a way of socializing in any situation fromanywhere in the world, and playing games while doing so, two birds with onestone.

Asher | Godno. He feels like an old man for not choosing to get involved with the internetvery much, aside from professional uses for his studies, browsing music andmaybe online shopping. Now he just feels it’s too much to catch up to, and he honestlydoes not really see the worth in many popular internet uses anyways, mundanestuff like that is mostly hard to relate to giving the issues he has to dealwith.

Teddy | Soso. He likes to play games or watch videos online, you might find him on ablogging platform, posting nature pictures and animals, (that reminds me i do have a blog for him lol [x] ) but he is not the typethat would get into every new trend that shows up. He might hear about them, beconfused by them, and ignore them just to stick to his little corner of theinternet.

Ace | Ohyeah, absolutely, he spends a lot of time online, blogging, trolling, general surfing,he likes to get into obscure new stuff. Actual memelord.

3. whatbenefits come with being their friend?

Finn |The most reliable person you can find. You can call Finn at 4 in the morningand ask him to drive to the next city if you really need him to be there, he isat all times willing to drop anything he is doing & put in any effort toaid a friend in distress.

Asher | Wellpeople certainly won’t notice since on their end it just seems like he’s beingan asshole but he’s very much destroying his own life to keep everyone aroundhim save, so that probably counts for something. You’ll also never ever have topay for anything ever again if he’s around, he would buy you a house or two andwouldn’t even miss or even notice the money he spent. If he’s your friend youcan certainly expect unending expensive gifts whenever he sees something thatyou’d enjoy, no occasion needed, not accepting them is not allowed. He feelsthat this is at least some way to make up for all the negatives. He also justreally likes to pamper people.

Teddy | Just…support I guess, in general. Lots of warmth and affection and reaffirmation,undying optimism and kindness. He’s like sunshine for the soul. Also they neverever have to worry about their plants dying again, though he’ll scold them ifthey are mistreated.

Ace |This one is kinda hard. You get the satisfaction of solving an impossibleriddle, and learning secrets nobody else will ever know. Think of a cat thatdoes not like anybody, letting you and only you pet it. Just a very exclusivefeeling. Also comes with undying loyalty.

5. whatparts of others do they envy?

Finn | Everythingthat exceeds his own abilities. Finn might seem confident and he often is, buthis ego crumbles very easily, like when someone else is good at something he isnot good at, or god forbid better at something he is proud of. This is moreaccurate for abilities than character traits or experiences.

Asher | Aregular life? He’d rather have grown up piss poor with a loving family than inhis current situation. Alternatively, sometimes he just wished he could havethe same lack of morals his father has, then at least he would not care aboutwhatever he is expected to do, it would certainly make his life easier.

Teddy | Heenvies confident, strong, charismatic people that are comfortable and competentin any situation. Also people that are comfortable arguing and venting theirproblems. He wants to be braver in every way.

Ace | Hewould not acknowledge it, but he envies sociable people, likeable people thathave no problem opening up and trusting others. He dislikes these things, butonly because he is bad at them.

2. howmany children do they want?

Finn | None!!Finn is terrified of history repeating and somehow ending up like his father. Hedoes not trust himself, looking at his mental instability and how irritable hecan be. He feels it is too easy to affect children in a negative way, even ifyou have the best intentions in mind. He also does not feel his genes are worthpassing on. Might be convinced to adopt a child in the future but that would bea very tough & long process and would require a partner that caneffectively sway his fears.

Asher | Atleast two but he cannot see that happening ever considering his baggage, andthat his situation would have to get better which he can’t imagine either.

Teddy | Three,probably because he enjoyed growing up with his two siblings, but he would alsowait for the right circumstances or not have children at all.

Ace | Idon’t think Ace has ever in his life even thought about whether he would liketo have children or not, it’s just not on his radar at all. He would probablygo for one, once more imitating his brother, but no children is way morelikely.

1. whatwould they never do?

Finn | Drugs,suicide. Biting into a raw tomato, he’s allergic, his body can’t handle thehistamines.

Asher | Physicallyharm other people, or negatively irreversibly changing another person’s life inother ways.

Teddy | Abandoninghis loved ones.  Detestable crimes. Littering.Eat meat.

Ace | Hecan probably bend his morals the most depending on what he deems necessary, butthere’s still lines he wouldn’t cross. (but ya know that counts for all ofthem, stuff like rape for example)

2. whathave they never done that they want to do?

Finn | Iactually can’t think of anything. There are probably some vacations he’d liketo have in some places he finds interesting, preferably with a s.o., but sincehe’s successful he has already fulfilled a lot of the things he’s neverimagined being able to do. Maybe drive a racecar, that’d be cool, maybe just aroadtrip across the US.

Asher | Withhis kind of money he can do whatever the hell he wants, so he has, except maybelive freely, does that count? Not following the superficial rules of societyand just doing his thing.

Teddy | Travel,everywhere, he wants to see the deserts, walk through a jungle, even see antarcticareas, just experience any kind of environment nature has to offer.

Ace | Toucha bearded vulture. Actually perform his music. Fight and beat every single oneof his teachers. Actually scratch all that, the only answer is beating hisbrother in a sword fight just once!

5.what’s your favorite thing about them?

Oh mygoddd this is so hard to put into words.

Finn | Ilike his duality. On one side he’s this shining, over-confident narcissist, andit’s not just a front either, but you just have to push the right button andhis ego will crumble in a second, and then he’s this self-deprecating self-loathingmess. I never planned for it but this duality is everywhere with him. He’sambidextrous, bisexual, bipolar… there is no limiting him. It’s also that he’ssuch an overeager caregiver that always has to make sure everyone is okay and satisfied,that he forgets to take care of himself.. though that’s probably more why I likeShawn so much, cause he’s so good at filling that position.

Asher | Hmmmhis capacity to care for others. He’s making his situation as terrible aspossible (meaning isolating himself on top of everything) because he can’t evenstand the thought of the possibilityof others getting hurt because of him. Also just generally making things sohard for himself when he could just obey his father and live a comfy life just occasionallytorturing and murdering people, he just CAN’T he couldn’t live with himself. Orjust leaving or even killing himself and pushing his little brother into thatproverbial knife. He’s a fucking saint even if he has to portray an asshole tobe so.

Teddy | Hmmhis moodiness I think? Cause a lot of him is that stereotypekilling-with-kindness, loving sunshine kid, but it’s not all just happy andagreeable, he can get pretty dark, it’s just that the sunshine side alwayswins.

Ace | Iwrote it in the masterpost, it’s that he is silly and tragic at the same time.He’s built such an impressive fake persona that even I forgot for a while whatactually lies at the core. And all that cooler-than-though fun tricksterpersonality is just as much part of him as the distrustful loner that’s tellinghimself he doesn’t need other people despite clinging to the ones that areclose like they are the air to breathe, regardless of them being good for himor not. Also the whole thing about him being unquestionably goodhearted without realizing it, or that he himself would have chosen an alternate version of himself that would have fought at the side of his brother.