#is it even coherent

[arminsumi]

alrighty, genuine question from your fav stalker (all jokes)

but! how do you have all this motivation to write? i used to love writing and making stories but now i feel so drained when i do it. like, i have all these ideas, but whenever i try to write them i just lose the motivation so fast 😭😭

oh hey saturn my fav stalker-darling, long time no see! 🤭

idk i'm a bit insane kidding kidding

writing feels as much necessary to me as breathing or eating. i'll always return to it and continue, even if i take a break (before writing on tumblr/wattpad i was very into drawing and didn't write at all, but technically i have been on-off writing since i was about seven years old)

sometimes a daydream or song/playlist or a film will motivate me, or reading very well-written work (even poorly written work, reading it compels me to make up for its existence by giving people something well-written)

i find it easier to write after i have had long daydream sessions (er, i used to have a problem with excessive daydreaming but i don't think y'all wanna hear abt that lol)

i'm also very motivated and inspired by Kerouac's "first thought, best thought" principle and Lucien Carr's "new vision" (i recommend reading this) of course the latter i only extract the idea of being raw and truthful in artistic expression

and goodness before i forget like the main reason for motivation lmao

i want to make people feel. writing can influence minds like nothing else, it's like drugs but um it's not detrimental to your wellbeing 😂 write for other people's sake, because there might be someone who really needs to read even one sentence from you. i'm very glad that my favorite authors wrote what they wrote. even glad that authors i don't like wrote, because their words changed my perspective in some small way.

mmm and that's all i can say 😂🥴 and if you're sick of writing, start something else, and return to the prior if you feel the urge from within your soul. never force yourself to write, let words come out naturally

ok i have to add a note bc i'm annoying but: actually Lucien coined "first thought, best thought" and not Kerouac, but everyone ascribes it to Kerouac

[cosmicraelum]

I rewatched perfect blue recently

[cashmoneyyysstuff]

sometimes katsuki gets really dramatic (but let’s be fr when isn’t he) and acts like you ghosted him when you don’t respond to his texts in thirty minutes. not in a creepy way, just in a dramatic, needy way.

he’s not worried or anything, he checks his phone every few minutes to see if any texts from you have come in. it’s a force of habit, because you usually respond pretty quickly but after a while it gets a little weird. and then he sends you a text and another one and unconsciously he starts spamming you a bit. again, not in a creepy way. just an annoying needy whiny dramatic baby, way.

“what’s up, bakubro ? you keep checking your phone.” katsuki doesn’t look at kirishima, eyes glued to his phone when he just grunts out an “‘m fine.”

and then kaminari just has to open his big mouth. his voice playful as he speaks “uh oh, trouble in paradiseee~?” katsuki scoffs, telling the blonde to fuck off.

and he isn’t worried..not at all. until he thinks about it and maybe there was trouble in paradise ?? were you maybe ignoring him ? what’d he do ?

you look up from your notebook at the sound of your phone vibrating. oh, it’s katsuki ! you smile just seeing his contact pop up.

“hi, katsu !”

silence, no response. you try again.

“…hello ?”

you hear a scoff from the other end, and some shuffling before your boyfriend graces you with an answer. “look at your phone, you idiot.”

“hello, katsu.” you snort. “yeah, yeah. hi.” you can practically hear the roll of his eyes through the phone, you giggle and your boyfriend huffs through the speaker.

it’s then that you see the wall of texts from him “oh, did you text me ? my bad i was studying.”

there’s a faint sigh of relief “‘s fine.”

“were you worried ?” you tease.

“fuck no. just—“ a sudden pause then katsuki grumbles “answer my texts next time, moron. bye. don’t overdo it while studying or i’ll kill you.”

“meanie !” you giggle, and when he hangs up you send him a text.

we can study together next time, just so you don’t flip out again 💗😚

katsuki scoffs a mean laugh, then sends you a middle finger.

[mayasaura]

Was thinking about this line because Harrow what the actual fuck are you talking about, and I realised something.

Not only does Harrow really for real not know that Gideon loves her—in the bullshit context of their lives, this is a reasonable misunderstanding for her to have.

What has Harrow known Gideon's life goals to be since they were children? Hint: There are at least two Harrow is fully aware of.

The first is to be wanted. As much as Gideon hates and wants to escape the Ninth, she also paradoxically craves their acceptance. They're the only community she's ever known. Harrow plays on that desire from the very beginning, mostly by kind of .... well, okay, by negging her about it. Ironically appealing to her sense of loyalty and duty to her house when they both know Gideon never even had that bridge to burn. That kind of thing.

Whether or not she's right, Harrow sincerely believes that acceptance to still be important to Gideon. First flower of my house, the greatest cavalier we have ever produced. You are our triumph. The best of all of us. When Harrow has only seconds left to make amends, she not only banks hard into praising Gideon, she frames it to unambiguously offer Gideon the acceptance she's always been conspicuously denied. Assuring her of her value not just as a person or as a cavalier, but as one of their house, one of their people.

The second thing Harrow knows is that Gideon wants to join the Cohort. Easy, everybody knows that. She's only been telling everyone with ears (and then some) since she was eight years old. It's the bait Harrow dangled to entice her into this mess. She wants to be a hero, to do great deeds like in the comic books. She wants to be a soldier.

Against the backdrop of all that context, Gideon's dying declaration "for the Ninth" starts to sound a hell of a lot more like "for Queen and country." Especially when you remember that Harrow is still the sovereign ruler of the Ninth. From Harrow's vantage point, Gideon could easily be playing the heroic underdog in a war movie. The soldier no one believed in until she threw herself on a grenade to save her squad. The knight errant who proved her chivalry by giving her life in service to her king.

From that perspective, Harrow's line to Ortus makes sense. She's following through on her promise of acceptance, defending Gideon's loyalty to the first Ninth face she sees. She's playing out Gideon's war hero fantasy, where Gideon's act of heroism proved them all wrong about her. In which case Ortus's response, "You are the most worthy heroes the Ninth House could muster. I truly believe that," flows very naturally as a reply. He understands what Harrow is trying to say, and affirms it.

It's not a hero's burial in the Anastasian, but it's the closest thing Harrow has the power to give her. And it's a fucking reasonable interpretation of Gideon's actions that doesn't touch on her feelings for Harrow at all. Fuck me.

[nenoname]

It's still interesting that TBoB called more attention to Stan's control over his mindscape (And if you go with the interpretation that the lost pages are partial truths that are heavily influenced by Bill, then he's the one insisting that only someone with training should be able to have that much control over the mind.)

Meanwhile we have a memory!Stan. Someone who apparently knows too much and is rather aware for being a simple memory.

From the Wheel of Shame, we know Bill was able dig up all kinds of dirt on Stan but... that wasn't why he was there in the first place, was it?

Bill couldn't find the code immediately despite a memory of Stan opening the safe being a few hours old at most and decided to have Mabel try find it for him (The original concept of the ep had it far more hidden but this was likely cut because of time constraints)

Ford did experiments on Stan's mind which likely meant using Project Mentem and actually looking around his mindscape, and his only reaction was to comment on his jokes-- despite what little we the audience know being enough to render us sobbing wrecks

(yes I refuse to shut up about this part cos the book's intro is extremely underrated)

Stan was able to replace his memories of Ford with the swingset instead and managed to hide Ford in his Bar Mitzvah memory. And that's not even mentioning the lack of visible Portal and Stan o' War which noticeably show up in Ford's dreamscape (the broken swingset manifesting anyway pains me tho)

He subconsciously has misdirects for his secrets that are both silly and manages to disturb everyone too

And while Bill-as-Soos being bored by the vending machine memory is a joke that's basically the crew's way of going "hey remember the thing way back in the first ep that's going to show up in the next one?" and in-universe appears to be Stan slipping up, it's interesting that they had Stan input the wrong code when it's consistent literally every other time its inputted (especially when it shows up correctly in the very next episode)

It's even possible that the safe code that Bill found could have been a misdirect too but we'll never know since the safe got blown open by dynamite.

Stan was able to buy time by making his mind blank despite being genuinely terrified when Bill enters his mind (to the point that he breaks character and uses his own voice to yell), and could conjure up his living room (in colour opposed to his mind's regular greyscale) to make sure Bill didn't have enough room to flee, slamming the door in his face before the effects of the memory gun kicked in.

(EDIT: Random door analysis here)

And maybe the twins eventually told him that Bill had already been inside his mind after their W3 reunion, but all we know was that his conscious self was left in the dark for ages and wasn't really aware of Bill until Weirdmageddon.

TBoB showing McGucket's dreamscape also brings up the idea of the effects of the memory gun manifesting differently to each person. To Stan's mindscape, the memory wipe manifests as blue flames which immediately brings to mind Bill's powers but it's a far lighter shade (maybe to more closely match the memory gun and its eventual fade to white?)

The end of TBoB and the website poem also firmly reminds us about Stan's connection to fire but there's also the question if Stan himself is actually aware of it...

[flowersforthemachines]

|| Companion skill animations (+ bonus Rook)

[rosieofcorona]

"hunt well," who let solas dragon age say that!!!!! in the middle of a ball where he's feeling sooo cocky and sooo in his element!!! GOD

[ninja-knox-ur-sox-off]

Yes im thinking about Sonic being the source of most of Tails issues. Not on purpose but just because of who he inescapably is. Yes im thinking about Sonic being so dedicated to making sure Tails never has to worry over him or feel afraid that he won't bounce back being so focused on smiling through everything and anything that he becomes unreachable. Yes im thinking about Tails needing so desperately to be self sufficent because he knows Sonic wants to adventure to run headfirst into danger and Tails needs to be capable and smart so he can be there with him he needs to be brave and mature so Sonic doesn't have to worry about him and can focus on looking after himself and most importantly he needs to not be a burden because Sonic loves running more than anything he loves being free and Tails needs to make sure he never ever slows him down because what if he cant keep up and Sonic runs away and never comes back?

So Tails expresses concern for Sonic after a rough battle and Sonic brushes it off with a grin despite the pain in his side. Sonic reaches to pass Tails something he can't reach and Tails swats his hand aside saying he can get it himself even if it's something so small and simple to have let Sonic pass him the screwdriver. Even if admitting he'd gotten nicked by that last laser would have been easier than wrapping up his side in a cave where no one could see. They've gotta let each other know they're untouchable and they don't need each other. So they won't worry. So they'll know they're okay. So they'll be safe. So he'll stay.

[thesuncantreachyouhere]

?????????????

i genuinely feel like im seeing things, this isnt real, right? nobody truly has this much mental dissonance that they would tag their post with both 'terfsafe' AND 'transgender', right? RIGHT?!??!?!?!?!

but yeah its the 'transandrobros' who are proto-terfs, totally

[thesaintofpatience]

for all the excellent meta going around about the nine houses and linguistics and cultural homogeneity and so on, I am still desperate for more wildly divergent linguistics between the Houses

holding out for fourth house rhyming slang and seventh house ironic double-verlan and ninth house sign language (for communicating via mute skeleton constructs across snow fields) and third house fan language and handkerchief codes

what slang terms do criminals use in the Dominicus system and where have they bled into common parlance? Likewise what Cohort slang has become commonplace in Second and Fourth that’s totally incomprehensible to the Sixth? What Latin phrases (“fiat lux!”) are a commonplace part of the Sixth vernacular, archaic but comprehensible to Eighth, mystifying to Third? Did Dulcie’s letters to Cam and Pal include glossaries and marginalia explaining synonyms and divergent definitions? Did they develop their own shared vernacular, tempering Sixth House academic prose with Seventh poetic styles, their own shared slang and inside jokes?

What John-isms are retained in the Fifth and Second House (I don’t even mean memes here I mean idioms like “dime a dozen” and “burning the midnight oil” and “snug as a bug in a rug” and “the ball’s in your court”) but not the others? Conversely, what new idioms and aphorisms confuse the hell out of John with each new Cohort intake? Has “needle in a haystack” been replaced with “hyoid in an ossuary” where hydroponic farming is the typical means of agriculture? Instead of “every cloud has a silver lining” is it “even rusty blades have an edge” where weather is no longer as notable an influence on day to day life?

Do they still give each other peace signs? Flip the bird? Stick two fingers up? Is crossing one’s fingers still a hope for good luck or a threat (indicating crossing swords)? Which Houses are known to talk with their hands (🤌)?

I could think about this all day but the main image I have is of Gideon doing this (👌- Ninth House sign language, emulates a skeleton’s eye socket: “I see you/acknowledged”) to, say, Babs (from Third where the same gesture, “the pinch”, emulates gathering of fabric and/or skin to test quality and fragility and is typically deemed a derogatory gesture) and starts an inter house diplomatic fracas

[b1mbodoll]

omg jay forcing you to take a dildo that is obviously to big for you 😵‍💫😵‍💫

god. yeah. and he’s so fucking good at it.

jay definitely sweet talks you the whole time too, praising you for takin’ such a big toy in your tight little pussy; presses kisses to your thighs and squeezes them lovingly. he has one of those clamp vibrators too, your clit pressed between it to draw more orgasms from you and make it easier to slide the toy inside. he loves watching you take thick toys.

he prefers knotted dildos so he can watch how your cunt gapes for him, your gasps n choked out cries of his name cause his cock to twitch, pre leaking from his slit n making a mess of his sweats, because yes. he is half dressed. he doesnt have to touch himself to cum, just wrecking you with a silicone cock is enough to have jay blowing his load.

the ring of your cream coating the knot and length of the toy make him fucking dizzy, he doesn’t know whether he wants to taste you or watch you deepthroat the toy instead.. maybe he’ll have you do it and kiss you messily afterwards, a gentle but firm hand on your jaw keeping you in place as he works his tongue inside your mouth, a mixture of drool and your cum makin’ a mess of your chins.

he doesn’t bother taking a hand off you or the dildo to stroke his cock, but when he gets too into it, jay grinds against the mattress, moaning deeply when you clench around the toy as your orgasm washes over you. he swears ‘s like he can feel how tight you’re gripping the toy and his fingers dig into your thigh as his hips stutter, his thick load seeping through and leaving a stain on his pants.

[deepseatime]

imagine you're odile (odile isat) and the only things you know about your mother is she was from vaugarde and she left before you could even remember her. and you spend your whole life searching for something of her in you. trying to line up where the emptiness of you could meet the form of her, like trying to line up a puzzle. and so you begin to learn everything you can about vaugarde. and the first thing, the main thing that everyone knows about vaugarde, is their belief in change:

that you must change. and in order to change, you must destroy what already exists.

idk about you but id just start killing at that point

[pillowfriends]

THAT FUCKING. THAT FUCKING EPISODE.

[bluebells-and-dragonflies]

Imagine Astarion with ears so sensitive that he's never willingly allowed anyone to touch them except for you. Imagine laying next to him in your bed, facing him, lifting your hand up slowly for that first touch. His eyes on yours, the rapidity of the breath he doesn't need to take, but still does reflexively. Seeing that he's nervous, but that he's trusting you, feeling his shaking hand come to rest on your waist. The audible sound he makes- half a moan, half a gasp- when you finally brush your thumb over the soft skin at the tip of his ear.

You trace the long shell of his ear and watch his pretty eyes, deep red like velvet in the moonlight, flutter shut. He says your name softly, as close as you've ever heard him to prayer. You pinch his earlobe gently, and his hips roll forward involuntarily, the jut of his hipbone pressing against your thigh as he makes himself still. Heat flares low in your belly, but you tamp it down as quickly as possible- likewise, Astarion makes himself still against you. This isn't sex and won't become sex, you'd promised each other (though that's not to say that you won't explore this thoroughly during one of your hours-long lovemaking sessions. He is all about experimentation these days, after all).

You lay there, touching him in his most vulnerable place, with reverence and grace and occasionally disbelief that you could be here at all with this beautiful, horrible, ridiculous and wonderful man, that you could be trusted so completely. You take in his every shuddering breath, the flexing of his fingers in your shirt, the softness of his mouth when he presses his lips to yours and tells you he loves you. If you have your way, if he has his, if somehow your utterly insane lives hold together for a year or a decade or ten, it will always be like this.

[hanfourz]

— h.ts thought [✷]

🪼 - saw a tweet abt taesans favorite place to take pics being the couch and i have Ideas...

warnings: suggestive, kissing, grinding

thinking abt heated makeout sessions with you on his lap. you could kiss him all day and be satisfied but today you're feeling a little more needy and of course he notices. taesan has a skill of knowing when he got you worked up and he uses it to his advantage (bc he's always a little better at hiding that he's worked up too). he slides his hands up your shirt and fondles your chest. when you whimper and arch into him, he smirks knowingly. when you start to grind against him, he's not surprised. he pulls away from your lips, much to your disappointment if the pout on your face was any proof. but when you stop moving your hips, he glides his hands down to hold your hips and grinds up into you. he's never done that before, but you're definitely not complaining. you, of course, continue your movement (catching on to that being what he wanted).

he watches you for a while, running his hands along your sides and back before an idea pops into his head. seeing you like this was making him feel a little crazy and he wanted to make sure he could remember this. the way you're looking at him with your teeth sunken into your lip, chest rising and falling as your breathing gets heavy, small whines slipping past your lips, hands gripping his shoulders, and your hips grinding desperately into his. he pulls his phone out, wanting- no, needing- to take a video of you like this. you almost ask what he's doing but decide to go with it, sliding your hands down his front and playing with the buttons on his shirt. he angles his phone from the side and leans forward to capture your lips again, moaning quietly into your mouth.

when things start to get intense again, he stops the recording and goes back to focusing completely on you. and when you whine that you need him (feeling hot and bothered at the idea of him filming you), he doesn't deny you.

[alicornze7]

Silly guys goin' on silly adventures:]

@rorydrawsandwrites's puppeteer au but the only difference is that jax gives consent

My contribution to this wonderful au has been long overdue:')

Rambling in tags ehe (cw: ribbun:p)

Well maybe it's not the only difference