Nico saying that Lewis gives his daughters boxes of presents every Christmas just got caught in my mind.
Imagine you were a mixed race boy born in Hertfordshire, different from everyone else around you. Bullied in school, being raised by your father to compete in a sport where money is very much of essence and you and your family do not have a lot of it. And then you meet this other boy who comes from the kind of life you dream to live one day. You're friends and fierce competitors. You find solace in each other. You visit Monaco for the first time with your friend, dreaming up the life you will have when you make it, when you beat out of the mould that the world thought it could capture you in.
And then you two grow through the ranks and you're at the pinnacle of your sport and you have what it takes to win and the world recognises that you can win. And you win. You win with your friend and fiercest competitor by your side fighting with you for those wins, and this fighting ruins something something that was valuable to both of you when you were still innocent and unsullied by life.
But despite everything that went into the doing and undoing of this relationship, you still realise that this person you once called a friend has a life and family beyond your bitter dynamic. He has children, and children need love and affection and good memories. And you're a better man now so you understand that. So you make sure the kids get gifts on Christmas. And you make sure of it every year. Afterall, if you met someone you loved deeply when you were both kids, wouldn't you feel a pang of nostalgia when they had kids. Wouldn't you try to extend the warmth that you couldn't find for your friend to his children. Afterall, whatever happens during childhood basically remains with you forever.
it’s actually driving me so fucking insane that cleo’s extension of trust didn’t end in betrayal. they saw the guy with a reputation for running as soon as the going gets tough show up on their doorstep and they gave him a chance anyway. cleo’s goal was never to win all they wanted was to cherish whatever time they had left with the people they cared about. she would have done anything for etho to survive and she brought grian into that circle despite the risk and it didn’t end in betrayal. cleo joked about it and scott who she respects so highly called grian untrustworthy to her face and she just laughed it off and it COULD HAVE WORKED. they were just so clearly outnumbered. grian told her to move, fought tooth and nail to fend off three people for long enough and if scar hadn’t come around cleo might have actually had a chance of escaping. she never would have asked for any of it but it was through giving her allies that chance that they proved themselves when it mattered most both during the apocalypse and at the very end. are you kidding me
crozier being kidnapped and telling goodsir not to worry because edward will be there on the morrow, completely sure of it, like it's inevitable. edward in fact immediately going to rally the men to get crozier back and finding they held a vote without him and it's been decided they'll leave without crozier (and without the sick). edward having the choice between being left alone with no chance at crozier's rescue or his own survival, or taking up his duty and leading the men onward. crozier in hickey's camp believing in edward's sense of loyalty and edward not showing up, not knowing how edward fought for him. crozier showing up at the final camp seeing edward mutilated but alive like he told him to, only to die. thinking about edward's absolute sense of loyalty to his captain and duty towards the men tearing him apart and it never saves anyone