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mangiomochi · 4 months ago

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LM’s Social Media

I made this long post to list all the social media accounts and profiles of Luigi Mangione. As many of you already know, a lot of his profiles have been taken down. The platforms where we could see the more personal side of Luigi and his experiences, like Facebook, Instagram, and Reddit, have been deleted. However, fortunately, some of his profiles on other platforms remain active to this day.

I’ll try to list each of these sites. If you see anything that needs to be corrected or know of another LM profile that isn’t listed here, I’d appreciate it if you shared it. My goal is to keep this post as updated as possible.

Disclaimer: English is not my first language, so if you notice anything odd in the writing, I apologize.

Facebook: luigi.mangione.2

Status: Taken Down First post: Jan 17, 2010 Last post: Aug 24, 2019

LM has had a Facebook account for quite some time—likely his first social media platform. His earliest posts date back to 2010. His last post was in 2019, which was also the year he was most active on the platform. That year, he posted several photos from a trip to Cabo San Lucas, Mexico with his fraternity and the three months he spent as a head counselor at Stanford in Palo Alto, CA.

Instagram: @luigi.from.fiji

Status: Taken Down First post: Aug 13, 2018 Last post: Aug 27, 2021

LM’s first Instagram post was in the summer of 2018. In that post, he explicitly mentioned that he created the account just to give one more follower to his sister’s blog. (LM has two sisters.) He also tagged his sister @lifewithlu__—or whatever handle she had at the time. If you've come across accounts currently using that handle on Instagram or Twitter, they are fake. LM’s sister apparently changed her username a while ago and later deactivated her account after LM’s arrest.

As for LM’s Instagram activity, his last posts were from the summer of 2021. He shared photos from a trip to Puerto Rico, where he was working remotely for some time, and from a trip to Hawaii with his other sister. LM also posted pictures with a friend he met at Stanford in 2019.

Additionally, LM had a highlight section featuring his predictions for 2027, which he uploaded in Jan 2021.

LM became inactive in 2022, despite appearing in a few posts made by his roommates in Hawaii. However, many of these posts were later deleted, or the accounts were set to private—likely to completely disassociate from LM and the allegations against him, or to avoid harassment from either his supporters or detractors.

In 2022, despite not posting anything himself, he was tagged in various posts and stories by his roommates and friends in Hawaii.

Instagram 2: @luiginmangione (probably fake)

Status: Taken Down

This account is probably fake, but we can’t be entirely sure. Unlike the confirmed account, this one was private and also has been deactivated. It had zero posts and 404 followers—an interesting detail, as "404" in some areas of computing means "not found," which is notable given that LM was reported missing in 2024.

As for the profile picture and bio, there was nothing we hadn’t seen before, making it highly unlikely that this account actually belonged to him.

Instagram 3 or Another Social Media Account

In messages between LM and one of his friends, his friend mentioned that he was wondering who the person trying to follow him was. It seems that in February 2024, LM created an account where it was impossible to recognize that it was him.

YouTube

First active: Unknown Last active: May 2024

You've probably already seen his supposed channel—the one with a single uploaded video and another that was never released. What was in that second video? Most likely some form of self-promotion from whoever was behind that account. Fortunately, the channel was taken down before that could happen.

However, we do know that LM had not just one but three YouTube channels, all of which were unfortunately removed due to YouTube’s absurd policies. According to the CNN article where this was mentioned, LM hadn't uploaded anything in seven months, meaning his last content would have been from May 2024. It's a complete mystery what he had posted—most likely something related to his trip to Asia. Sadly, we may never know. YouTube acted so quickly against LM’s channels that the internet didn’t have time to archive the deleted content.

Another possible type of content LM might have uploaded to these channels includes drone footage from Hawaii and Asia, projects from his time at Penn (2016–2020), or even school projects.

GitHub: lnmangione

Status: Still Up First active: Feb 27, 2015 Last active: May 8, 2021

In case you’re not familiar, GitHub is a platform where users can store and update code—directly related to LM’s career and essential for anyone studying or working in a field that involves coding.

LM was active on GitHub from 2015 to 2021, contributing to personal projects, FTC (Robotics), and university assignments. In 2020, after graduating, he used it to prepare for coding interviews. By 2021, he was mainly working on private projects, likely related to his remote job. Apparently, Luigi stopped being active on GitHub in 2021.

Twitter: @PepMangione

Status: Again, Still Up First tweet: Apr 14, 2016 Last active: Jun 10, 2024

This was probably the social media platform where LM was most active before his arrest. His most active year was 2024, and he had been using this account since 2016, although he didn’t post anything after 2016 and only became active again in 2021

His earliest tweets appear to be automated posts with random numbers, possibly tests for some kind of Twitter-connected application.

Aside from that, his Twitter provides insight into his ideology, which seems somewhat ambiguous. Politically, he didn’t appear to have strong affiliations.

After his arrest, LM’s account was taken down but later reinstated. And it was recently taken down again on March 19, 2025, for a few hours and then reinstated. He followed only 71 people—later 70, after a Japanese poker player he met in Tokyo in February removed him as a follower. Currently, LM’s account has over half a million followers. Before his arrest, several accounts followed LM during the time he was missing—most of them were likely bot accounts, though not all, as some belonged to friends trying to contact him through public tweets you’ve probably already seen.

LM didn’t follow any of his friends on Twitter. Some of his friends did follow him, which means either he never followed them back or he unfollowed them at some point.

Regarding his banner, it consists of three images:

Breloom from Pokémon – This is directly linked to Theory 286, which you may have heard about. It connects Breloom’s Pokédex number (286) with LM’s total number of Twitter posts, which was also 286 (now 285), as well as with certain health insurance denial codes. Personally, I think this is just a coincidence. Breloom was likely there because LM liked the Pokémon—it’s a Fighting type, which can be linked to physical activity, and is a Mushroom, which could relate to his interest in psychedelics.

X-ray from his surgery – This was from a procedure that took place on July 21, 2023 (though I’m not sure if that’s the exact date). This means his header was updated at least after that date.

A shirtless photo of him on a mountain in Hawaii – We know that one of LM’s favorite activities was hiking.

The last known activity of LM on Twitter was on June 10, 2024. That day, he retweeted a post and sent a DM to Gurwinder in response to a tweet, asking him to show him how to curate his feed to display more valuable and educational content.

After LM disappeared, during July, October and November, his friends tried to reach out through tweets and probably also through private messages.

Twitter alt: (Fake)

I don’t remember the name of the account, but it was something related to mushrooms, it was initially linked to LM due to its similarities with his interests. However, it was later clarified that this profile does not belong to LM, and the shared interests were purely coincidental.

Linktree: lnmangione

State: Still up

Linktree is a platform that allows users to compile multiple links into a single page, making it easier to share various profiles, websites, or projects. Many content creators and professionals use it to organize their online presence.

LM did have a Linktree, but instead of links, it only contained a series of emojis. No actual links to his profiles or projects were listed, making it unclear what the purpose of his account was.

Here’s a possible interpretation of LM’s emojis based on what we know about his interests:

💻🤓 – Likely represents his tech side.

🥷🏃‍♂️🧘‍♂️🏋️ – Suggests his active lifestyle, including exercise, meditation, and discipline. The ninja could represent martial arts.

📚🤓 – Reflects his love for books and self-education.

🦍🧠 – Likely represents LM’s interest in gorillas, as seen on his Goodreads, Reddit and Twitter.

🍄🧠 – Likely a nod to his interest in psychedelics.

🐄👨‍⚖️ – Might reference ethical concerns about the meat industry or food regulations. It could also be a nod to Moo’s Law, a book exploring the rise of lab-grown meat, its potential to revolutionize food production, and the ethical, environmental, and economic implications of this technology.

☯️ – Represents balance, Eastern philosophy, or mindfulness practices.

Snapchat: luigimangione

State: Taken down

LM’s Snapchat was listed in his yearbook alongside his Facebook, suggesting he was quite active on the platform. After his arrest, his account remained up for a few days. Someone posted screenshots of his profile on TikTok before it was taken down, but I haven’t been able to find them. Perhaps that profile was also taken down due to TikTok’s constant censorship. His avatar was surprisingly well-made. If anyone has those screenshots and can share them, I would be grateful and will, of course, give credit.

Substack: @anotherdayanotherplay

Status: Still Up

Substack was where LM followed many of the writers he engaged with on Twitter. One of them was Gurwinder, a British blogger whose work LM seemed to appreciate deeply. He liked it enough to purchase a premium subscription to Gurwinder’s Substack blog, The Prism, which costs $200. This subscription granted LM perks like a video call with the writer.

Gurwinder’s articles cover topics such as gamification, short-form video platforms and their negative effects, and NPC behavior.

You can read more about this meeting in the article Gurwinder wrote about LM.

TikTok: @lnmangione (Fake)

Not Owned by LM

If you’ve seen some of LM’s tweets, you’ll know he was against short-form video platforms, making it unlikely that he ever had a TikTok account. The account mentioned here does not appear to belong to LM. Most of its reposted content is in German and English, Additionally, the type of content shared on this account doesn’t align with LM’s known interests.

TikTok started gaining popularity between 2018 and 2020, so we can’t completely rule out the possibility that LM once had an account.

LinkedIn: Luigi Mangione

Status: Still Up Joined: Feb, 2015 Last active: 2023

LinkedIn is the go-to social media platform for job searching, and LM’s profile provides detailed insight into his education and work history. His last known job was at TrueCar, where he had been working remotely for some time. He left this job at some point in 2023, but he never updated his LinkedIn to reflect this change.

The exact reason LM left TrueCar remains unknown. One theory suggests he resigned to take time off for traveling and recovering from his surgery. Another theory points to company-wide layoffs at TrueCar. However, we can’t confirm anything for sure, as TrueCar declined to provide detailed statements, citing employee privacy—specifically in LM’s case.

Reddit: u/mister_cactus

Status: Taken Down Joined: Feb 23, 2016 Last active: May 25, 2024

Reddit was one of the platforms where LM was quite active, and he remained so until May 2024, sharing details about his travel through Asia. LM created his Reddit account in 2016, the same year as his Twitter.

In the beginning, his activity was mostly related to university projects, garage sales, and Pokémon Go. Over the years, he also engaged with posts discussing brain fog, spondylolisthesis (spondy), and other topics. From his comments, we know that at some point, his health insurance provider was Blue Cross Blue Shield. He also shared details about his struggles with spondylolisthesis and how a surfing accident in 2022 worsened his condition.

In 2023, LM posted about his decision to undergo spinal fusion surgery, sharing research on successful cases. His most recent Reddit activity in 2024 included reposting videos of the mass street livestreams that have become common. LM seemed highly aware of how technology was creating these dystopian scenes.

His final Reddit post detailed what he packed for his trip to Asia—notable items included:

Backpacks

An iPhone 13 Mini

A drone - DJI Mini 2 Drone

A physical book (LM preferred them over digital ones)

Other personal essentials

Unfortunately, his account was taken down shortly after being discovered. It's unclear whether this was due to Reddit’s questionable policies or possibly mass reports against the account.

Goodreads: luigimangione

Status: Set to Private

LM’s Goodreads account gained attention after his arrest, offering a detailed look into his reading preferences. His library included a mix of genres, with notable categories such as:

Self-help books

Back pain management

Psychedelics

Agronomics

Moo’s Law

Exercise books

Books about Hawaiian islands

Fantasy and science fiction, including A Brave New World and Harry Potter

LM was quite active on the platform, frequently writing detailed reviews and sometimes even adding handwritten notes to his books.

Steam: Pep

Status: Still Up Joined: Oct 20, 2013 Last active: Jul 7, 2024

Steam is the most popular platform for purchasing games, and LM had been active on it for a long time. His last recorded activity was on July 7, 2024—exactly six months and 2 days before his arrest. The last game he played was PUBG.

Looking at his library, you can see the wide variety of games he played over 11 years since Oct 2013. One touching detail is that many of his friends still have him added, and one of them even changed their username to "FreeLuigi"—a clear sign of loyalty and support. That’s definitely a good friend.

LM also had an alt account added, but nothing noteworthy has been mentioned about this account.

The last games LM played are:

PUBG: BATTLEGROUNDS – last played on July 7, 2024 Orwell – last played on June 28, 2024 Spelunky 2 – last played on June 2, 2024

Tinder

Joined: Nov 27, 2021 Last active: Dec 18, 2022

Apparently, Luigi was only active on Tinder for a short time in December 2022, though his profile dates back to November 27, 2021. His love life is also a complete mystery, so it’s interesting that he even had a Tinder account. Shoutout to the person who spent 15 bucks to unlock the unique photos Luigi had here 🫶

Trello: @luigimangione

Status: Still Up Joined: Unknown Last active: Unknown

Trello is a platform designed to help teams organize their work. There isn’t much to see on LM’s account, but his profile picture is the protagonist of Spelunky—one of the games he has logged the most hours on in Steam.

Pinterest: luigimangione

Status: Still Up Joined: Unknown Last active: Unknown

There isn’t much to see here. LM only saved a hoodie, likely as a show of support for Tim Urban and his blog Wait But Why—one of the writers he was most enthusiastic about.

Spotify (Fake)

These Spotify profiles began circulating just hours after Luigi Mangione’s name became widely known. However, these profiles are fake and seem to be an attempt to link Luigi to various musical tastes—such as artists like Clairo, Charlie XCX, or Blackpink. If you’ve tried to research Luigi’s musical preferences, you’ll know that there’s very little information available. The only two songs we know Luigi listened to are from his SoundCloud account.

SoundCloud

Status: Still Up Joined: Unknown Last active: Unknown

This is where Luigi liked two EDM tracks that are not very well known. These are currently the only reference we have to LM’s musical tastes.

Chess: sexytwerker69

Status: Still Up Joined: Sep 19, 2017 Last active: Dec 22, 2023

This is one of my favorites. The nickname is quite original and gives us a glimpse into Luigi’s sense of humor. This profile was created in 2017, and the profile picture is a unique selfie of Luigi biting an apple—one of the few selfies he had taken. This confirms that the account is indeed his.

Other noteworthy details include that his last activity on the account was in 2023. Additionally, he had the Italian flag on his profile instead of the American flag, showcasing his pride in his Italian heritage—just in case that wasn’t clear enough.

Venmo

Status: Still Up

Venmo is a personal payment platform commonly used in the United States.

Activity on LM’s account is mostly from 2017, the year when Luigi was selling Christmas lights at his university. While we’re not entirely sure what he was raising money for, many of the payments made to and from him included some of the silly comments that showcased Luigi’s sense of humor.

DISQUS: @luigimangione

State: Still up Joined: Jun 20, 2017 Last active: Jun 20, 2017

LM's only activity here was commenting on a post from Wait But Why. The blog post was Neuralink and the Brain’s Magical Future. This was the only community he followed and his only interaction on the platform.

Sporcle: lnmangione

State: Still up Joined: Jan 23, 2024 Last active: Feb 4, 2024

Sporcle is a trivia and quiz platform where users can test their knowledge on various topics. LM had an account here, among the quizzes he completed were Most Visited Websites, Countries in Europe, SpongeBob Characters, Most Populous Countries, US States, Computer Hardware Parts, Programming Language Popularity, Genetics Vocabulary, Super Secure Bunker and Erase the Periodic Table.

Devpost: luigimangione

State: Still up

This is a platform where developers showcase and submit projects for hackathons. LM was active here during his university years, submitting a project for PennApps competition. Not much to see, but it gives a glimpse into his early coding days.

Other sites that seem to belong to Luigi are:

Apple Profile State: Still up A default profile linked to Apple services, not much to see here.

DockerHub State: Still up A platform for sharing and managing Docker containers, LM had no repositories here.

HackerRank State: Still up A coding challenge site; LM had no public activity or submissions here.

Medium State: Still up A blogging platform; no known posts from LM, but the account exists.

And that would be all the profiles I know of so far. As a small reward for making it to the end of this post, here’s a low-quality picture of Luigi showing off his perfect side profile 🙌

#luigi mangione

413 notes · View notes

cuppajoel · 24 days ago

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the next seven dates| the contractor

PAIRING: modern au/ no cordyceps/younger (late 30s)!Joel Miller x plus size!reader

SYNOPSIS: Dating apps have convinced you that love isn’t real and that all men are pigs. Turning to your bffs for a Hail Mary, you ask them to set you up on a blind date each to restore your faith. Your first date is with a contractor called Joel.

wc: 8.7k (oops)

TAGS: 18+MDNI, NSFW, Modern AU, smut, developing relationships, reader is plus-sized, able bodied and afab, no other description is given. Heavy flirting, first date vibes, Joel is a gentleman at heart, dirty talk, heavy petting in a taxi, alcohol consumption, sex while under the influence, pnv protected (the crowd boos) sex, v fingering, oral sex (f receiving). Both characters are in their 30s.

A/N: I started writing this in September and fell away so many times bc writing for Joel Miller scares me. If you’re looking for a sign to write the thing that you want to read, this is it. Not beta’d.

For context of the fic. This shot is called a blowjob. It’ll all make sense, I promise.

Reblogs, comments and likes are all appreciated <3

Jingling your keys in your right hand, you watch as the numbers climb on the digital display, showing what floor you’re on. You’re exhausted. You let your head fall back against the mirrored surface behind you, your back resting on the metal bar and your eyes fluttering shut for a moment of respite. Although it wasn’t the worst date you’d ever been on, it was a close second or third. You take a deep breath.

From the moment you stepped foot into that bar, the guy was a red flag that turned into a 5-alarm fire.

“Oh wow you look good… A lot like my sister… DING Not that I think my sister looks good, but you look hot, d’you work out? DING Yeah, you can tell… how much do you squat? DING oh, well, I could probably bench you…DING We should try that sometime, if you know what I mean? DING. He laughs, a mix of a frat bro and that lizard meme comes to mind.

The elevator doors open with another ding, making your right eye twitch slightly as you cross the carpeted hall to your apartment. You turn the key in the lock and give your door the customary shoulder barge before the locking mechanism is released. Hooking your jacket and purse on the wall and locking the door behind you, you kick off your shoes and head straight for your giant corner couch, collapsing onto it with a huff.

This wasn’t just a bad date. It was a bad date after a series of bad dates, one after another. The only takeaway from each is that people seriously hyperbolise themselves online.

You were relatively new to the world of online dating after catching your fiancé of three years, Jake, doing the downward dog with your shared yoga teacher only eight months ago.

Jake was everything you thought you wanted. A nice guy with a secure 9-5 and a handsome face. But everything about him was just nice. Your dates, your apartment, your sex- all nice. And at the end of it all, he was cheating on you- real fucking nice.

Unlocking your phone, it opens to the group chat thread between you and your two best friends. You hold down the voice note button.

“So you may be wondering ‘Why is she home already?’ Well, my sweet summer children, not only did my date admit that he found his sister attractive and wanted to ‘bench me’ all before we ordered our first drink…” You pause for dramatic effect, knowing they can’t hear you, but it makes you feel better. You huff out an empty chuckle. “I am just so over it. How can a man say that his favourite film is “Little Women”, have pictures of his rescue cats on his profile, and still be that much of a stereotypical douche?” You fling your head back, resting it on the top of your couch.

“I’m going to do something dramatic and soooo not me… I am deleting the apps… the two of you are tasked with finding me a date each. I don’t wanna know anything about them before I see them- just their name, age, and one picture. You decide who is going first and the winner gets to be maid of honour at the inevitable wedding… Anyway, I’m going to go read one of my fairy porn books and contemplate my life… Night, loves!”

Somehow, you muster the energy to shift yourself from the couch to your room. You bunch up your tainted date clothes, toss them in the general direction of your hamper and pull on an oversized T-shirt. The wasted makeup is double-cleansed off your face, and you shove your hair up into an extremely unflattering bun. Grabbing your Kindle from under your pillow, you flop back onto your bed; your dates with the beautiful high-fairy king never disappoint.

Almost a week later, your best friends pull through. Having found a guy each, who they swear is the one you’ve been looking for, they arrange your dating schedule between themselves. Tonight was the first. In the Uber ride over to the restaurant, you send your location to your friend who set up the date.

Any last-minute words of wisdom?

He’s kinda that strong, silent type.

Also southern

A gentleman for sure!

Hopefully not all of the time 😮‍💨

You shove the car door closed, adjust the strap of your purse on your shoulder, and tuck your phone inside. You feel good tonight. Blue jeans, a red lip, oversized, white-button down, black, pointed-toe, heeled boots-damn they hurt, but they look so good. You slide your index fingers into the belt loops either side of your hips, hiking them up slightly to allow the denim to stretch around your ass just right.

Rounding the corner, you find yourself on the strip of bars and restaurants on the main street. You weave in and out of the patrons, everyone being washed with the rich blues and reds of the neon lights beaming down on them. As you push the door with your hip and descend the two steps to the bar, you lick your teeth, making sure they’re free from any red stains.

Inside is quite the contrast from the bustle of the streets a few feet away. The place is busy, for sure, but it’s as if everyone is collectively trying to keep the atmosphere calm and easy. A massive mahogany coloured bar is the feature of the room, with hanging, warm, filament bulbs creating small spotlights all along it.

You walk further into the room, parallel with the bar, coming to a stop at its corner, facing the bartender. You squint your eyes slightly, trying to pull out familiar shapes from the hundreds of glass bottles behind the bar. The bartender gives you a small smile; it’s your turn.

“Can I have a Tanqueray Savillia gin and tonic, please?” You ask with a soft smile, reaching for your purse to pull out your wallet. “Oh, and a shot of tequila…” You wouldn’t normally mix drinks on the first round, but you also wouldn’t normally go on a blind date.

“Sure. Do you wanna start a tab?” is the return. You look up to answer their question, having retrieved your card and holding it firm between your index and middle fingers.

“Yeah, plea-“

“I got the this one.” A warm, sturdy presence flanks you on your right shoulder. Their strong right hand is placed gently on the bar next to you. Your eyes flick up to the mirrors behind the bar, meeting his in the reflection. He’s looking right back at you through the glass, and a small, closed-mouth smile creeps across your face as you turn to face him in real life.

“Joel?” He nods slowly in response, the smile not faltering as he looks down at you, a glitter in his espresso-coloured eyes. His eyes trail down your form and then back up; you allow yourself to do the same to him. Although not the tallest man you’ve seen, he’s built big.

He’s wearing a charcoal grey, brushed-cotton button down and dark-wash denim jeans that fit him perfectly. Both sleeves of his shirt are folded in on themselves and stop just below his elbow. His hair must be naturally wavy or curly, but it’s been pushed back and tamed slightly, a few curls going rogue.

“Hey, it’s good to meet ya,” he tips his head down slightly as you raise yours, meeting each other in the middle as you press a kiss on the other person's cheek. He smells warm and masculine, a mix of cedarwood and something earthy, like basil. “I’ll take a Glenlivet 15 and a shot of tequila- the tab is under Miller. Thank you.” He smiles firmly at the bartender. Your eyes follow the line of his thick neck, up through his jaw, which is peppered with trimmed salt and pepper stubble.

“Shit, I’m sorry…” your hand comes up to his jaw, remnants of your merlot coloured lipstick on his cheek. He turns back to you and creases his eyes slightly, not following your apology but also not flinching an inch as you place your hands on him.

Your thumb moves in a slow and firm window-wiper motion to try and remove the stain. “I got lipstick on you…” Your left hand now comes up to the other side of his face, pushing ever so slightly to get him to turn to face you more. He preens into your touch, malleable to where you want him. The trimmed stubble pricks lightly at your fingertips.

“Is it my colour at least?” He teases, he looks down at you from the corner of his eye as you woman-handle his face. Damn, his voice is deep. It rumbles through your chest, signifying how close you are to this broad, thick, stranger.

“Yes. Very pretty.” You return with the same level of flirt. Your eyes shift from the red mark you’ve placed on him to his as you give him a lazy smile. The bartender sets up your drinks on the bar in front of you, making you both finally pop from whatever bubble you found yourself in. Three minutes in and you’re already cradling his face? Nice one, babe. You hear your friend's voice in your head.

“Well…” Joel picks up both shot glasses of tequila and hands you one, raising his own, and an eyebrow in your direction. “Cheers-“

“Hold it!” You cut in, your glass also raised to the same level as his. “Gotta look me in the eyes as we drink… otherwise it’s seven years bad sex.” You say, dipping your voice ever so slightly as you remember the above dive-bar standard of the room you find yourself in.

“Shit- well…” Joel smirks, he clinks his glass against yours. “Can’t be havin’ that now darlin’” That southern accent clings to every word as he throws the liquid back, his eyes not faltering for a second. You mirror his actions entirely, trying your best not to screw up your face as the liquid heats your insides.

He gives a silent chuckle before leaning into you again, hand on the small of your back and his mouth hovering just over your ear. “I snagged a table in the corner over there…” He points over your shoulder and you follow with your eyes. “Means you can keep telling me how pretty I am…” he teases and resumes his stance- one giant hand supporting himself on the bar.

Your mouth raises slightly at the sides. That first shot of alcohol hits you nicely as the smell of his cologne makes you breathe harder. “Sure.” You grab your drink from the bar and walk ahead of him to the vacant table, hoping that ‘ol’ faithful’ jeans are doing their job.

You stop just before the chair that isn’t covered by his leather jacket, waiting for confirmation. It comes in the form of Joel pulling out the seat for you. “Pretty and a gentleman… so many sides to you, Joel.” You say, not putting your full weight on the chair so that he can tuck it in under you.

He quickly joins you at the table, his large presence not diminished by his seated position. “Well, what can I say? I’ve got many talents.” He shrugs as he takes a sip of his amber liquid, the ice clinking softly as he places it back down.

In the ease of the past forty minutes, you both had forgotten that this was a first date. A charged silence falls upon you both as you simply take each other in, smiling widely when you catch eyes.

Joel watches as you unconsciously play with your necklace. He’s actively trying to stay in the room rather than let his mind wander about your full, rounded lips that flash red with danger.

“So, I gotta say, I thought you’d be a little more bossy given your demand for a blind date… You do that often?” He sips the whisky, hoping it will bring him back to earth. He so desperately didn’t want to be the guy not paying attention to what you were saying, given that he had asked the question.

“No,” you started, your eyes crinkling at the sides as you smile, “I don’t usually demand that they set me up on blind dates, but the last guy I went on a date that I organised admitted his attraction towards his sister and then tried to organise sex… all within the same sentence, so I’m starting to doubt my abilities to pick for myself.”

Joel splutters on his drink slightly, the fiery liquid catching the back of his throat as he coughs. “You got any siblings?” you cock your head, chuckling that you caught him off guard.

“My brother has a bit too much moustache for my taste,” he says, taking another quick sip to hopefully soothe the burning in his throat. “And I don’t tend to ‘schedule in’ sex.” He murmurs, the words coming out a bit laboured due to the whisky in his throat.

“Noted.” You return, “I’ll make sure to keep mine at bay.” You rub your upper lip before finishing off the last mouthful of your drink. “You want another drink?” You ask in a way that sounds hopeful. Not wanting to run after 10 minutes? Double nice one babe.

“Yeah.” He savours the last sip of his drink, licking across his bottom lip. “What can I get you?”

“Oh no, this one’s on me, pretty.” You wink at him. Joel opens his mouth in protest but wavers, a slight flush coming over him at his new nickname. “Same again?” You ask.

Joel notices how the lights strung around the place bounced off your eyes, making it harder to see their colour but even more difficult to look away. You pick up his empty glass as you stand. Joel nods in response, giving an earnest “Thank you, darlin’.” As he watches you make the small walk from your table to the bar, he gives himself full permission to check you out.

Your jeans look like they were painted on by the devil, caressing every curve of your waist and thighs. The back pocket of your pants stretches and pulls as you slide one of your hands in, waiting on a popped hip to be served at the bar. The denim leaves little to the imagination but, boy, was Joel imagining? He never wanted to be in a wrestling match more than with this pair of pants. He takes a deep breath, trying not to think about how difficult it would be to peel them off your body.

You move, shifting your weight to your other hip; your heels must be hurting you, he thinks. He lets his eyes wander up over your silhouette, up to your profile, as he does, he sees your eyes waiting for his. “Busted.” you mouth to him, your lips forming a wicked smile.

Joel smirks too, not letting up his gaze and nodding. ”So busted.” he says under his breath.

It’s not long before you join him back at your table, setting his down in front of him with a tip of your head before sitting back and enjoying a long sip from your own.

From the corner of your eye, the bartender comes over, placing two shot glasses in front of you. “Ah, thank you!” You say to them as they return to their bar. “Here ya go, I didn’t have enough hands for everything.” You hold out the shot to Joel with a devious look that wasn’t there before you’d left.

It wasn’t a shot Joel had ever seen before, a mix of different browns and beiges topped off with whipped cream. Joel takes the small glass between his fingers and crinkles his eyes at you. “Should I be scared?” He says, turning the glass to see the different liquors marbling together.

“That depends…” You move your shot glass to your other hand and lick some whipped cream off your thumb before switching it back to your dominant hand. “Do you like blowjobs, Joel?” You flutter your lashes and smile sweetly at the man across from you, whose jaw had just gone slack and eyes darker from the last time you’d looked at them.

Joel, not wanting to interrupt whatever mood you’d returned with from that bar, makes a deep “mmm mmm mmm” sound that started somewhere in his chest as he shakes his head and purses his lips. “You are trouble, ain’t you?” With that, you clink the glass against his and smile again.

“You have no idea.” You tip the glass back along with your head, just slightly so as not to break eye contact. Joel mirrors your motions, trying not to tempt fate given that he had a demon in front of him. Quickly, his gaze falters as the contrast in taste between the shot and his whisky has him shivering.

“Is that the best blow job you’ve ever had?” There you were again, licking the sweetness of the liquor from where it’d spilled on your fingers. A carnal image of you doing that after having his cock in your mouth flashes before his eyes. He shifts in his seat, having to tug at the denim at his crotch.

“Probably not.” Joel starts, taking a drink to rid his mouth of the overly sweet shot. “But, I believe in second chances-can always try again.” The liquor was starting to talk for him as he felt it climb his neck and up his ears.

“Okay, so I have this game that I play on dates…” You start, somehow your chair had drifted closer and closer throughout the night, as you both take turns getting the next round from the bar. As you sit elbow to elbow with Joel, close enough to smell the whisky that mixes with his earthy cologne.

“I like where this is headed already.” His accent has gotten stronger over the hour that has passed.

You shove his shoulder, “Shut upp. The game is that you have to imagine that your memory is wiped, so you get to experience things for the first time again… I then give you a category and you can only pick one thing, okay? So, if I were to say movie: what movie would you want to experience watching for the first time again?”

“Blade Runner”, he says, without hesitation. His eyes were starting to have that warm, glazed look that comes with drinking. “You?”

“Probably Scream or Fight Club- I like a twist. Vacation?”

“Ireland.”

“Australia.” you respond, picking up the pendant on your necklace out of habit, dragging it back and forth along the chain. Joel follows the movement of your fingers with his eyes, letting it soothe him too. “Food?”

“Mmmm, that’s a hard one…probably something that my Mom makes, like chilli or barbecue.”

“You’re easy to please, hm?”

“Give me a plate of good food and I’m yours.” He picks up his glass, trying to savour the liquid as you’d both agreed ‘just one more’ two drinks ago.

“I also love chilli.” You start, watching the way his lips wrap around the glass and how his tongue flicks across his lips when he sets it back down. “But I think I’d go with a dessert like chocolate fudge sundae… or, have you ever had one of those French pastries… What are they called? Pain au chocolat? That would be mine.”

He hums again, enjoying watching you ask and answer your own questions. The fidget that you started with the pendant of your necklace holding steady. In a moment of no thought, Joel slowly reaches out and stills your movement to look at the gold medal. “This is pretty.” He says to himself more than anything.

His big hand covers yours and flips the coin-shaped jewellery over with his fingers, the only response you can muster, “mmm”. He surveys the jewellery as best he can in the dim light of the bar, noticing the engraving on the back.

“It’s my initials.” You say. Your hand, and his, staying exactly where they are.

“Oh, you have a middle name.” More an accusation than a question. He sounds as if he’s uncovering some hidden gem about you. “What is it?”

“Nuh uh, you’re not getting it that easy. That’s for date five at least.” You tease, your gaze becoming heavier, the devious glimmer in Joel’s eyes becoming stronger.

“Anything else special happen on date five?”

”You might get another blowjob… but you were so ungrateful for the first one.” Your eyes drop to his mouth and then back up to his.

Joel can feel himself aching to be closer to you. His hand that holds the pendant now drifts to your jaw, his thumb feathering over your cheek, mirroring the window-wiper hold you had him in the first moments that you’d met each other.

He had a craving to explore every part of you, to taste, smell, and hear you. The need shoots through every nerve ending, spurring him on to take everything he can. But he has to slow down, or else take you to the bathroom and make you fill up all of his senses.

The Texan gentleman within him holds strong, as much as he could feel all of his reasoning heading south. He brings his face closer to yours, that slanted smile quickly becoming your favourite sight. “Can I take you home?” He rumbles, his voice low and soft so only you both could hear it.

The whisky on his breath makes your eyes flutter as you draw a sharp breath at his question. Your mouth turns up at the sides, you can tell your eyes have the same shimmer as his. Tipsy. Ready.

This wasn’t something you’d planned on. You had so many rules about first dates: No kissing (hence the red lipstick), no sharing a car, and no sex until you felt safe. With this man’s hand cradling the back of your neck and his calloused thumb tracing down your jaw and back again, you feel like syrup dripping over hot pancakes.

You’ve lost all sense of what time it is, or how long you’d been sitting there, inches from his face as your body screams at you to kiss him.

His face is so close to yours that his features become fuzzy. Your eyes are having a hard time focusing in this light. Joel’s eyes move over your features, waiting, restraining, teasing, not daring to push further until you say so.

You reach out to the corded forearm that is tensed and attached to the hand that was holding you gently. Your manicured nails rake up and down his arm in a feathered tickle. You feel his breathing deepen as you press your top teeth into your bottom lip.

“You’re gonna need to,” The pressure from your scratches is getting slightly harder, causing a hum to vibrate in Joel’s throat. “or else everyone will see how pretty you are with this shade of lipstick on your mouth.”

Joel takes the weight of your head and neck in his hands. He holds you both in that position; thick fingers cradling your nape. His tongue traces along his lips and pulls back slightly just so he can take in the heavy-lidded, slack-jawed sight before him.

“Let’em see.” he brings his lips, achingly close to yours, his eyes open, waiting for that last confirmation before he hands over his soul.

In an instant, his lips find yours, setting a slow, strong pace. The trimmed stubble on his upper lip chafes against your soft skin, creating the sweetest friction.

His cologne, mixing with the whisky and the warmth of his skin, takes over your senses as the broad backed man envelops you in his big arms.

Raking your hands through the soft curls at the back of his head, you can help but kitten lick at his bottom lip, craving a taste of that whisky you’ve seen him sip at all evening.

It only takes an instant for Joel’s breathing to deepen and for his tongue to meet yours, you both stifling a moan as you slide deeper and deeper into each other’s mouths.

Your wills, hanging by a thread, allow you a moment of clarity to softly pull away. A noise rumbles within Joel’s chest as you do, his resolve slipping like sand in an hourglass. With heavy eyes he lingers on your messy mouth, his brain unable to think of anything else than what state you’d end up in after his cock passes through your full lips.

With a chuckle, you bring your thumb to his mouth, wiping away the remnants of your lipstick that have transferred to him. “Messy boy.” You mumble, assuming your pupils must be the same size as his. He mirrors the movements on your mouth. The lipstick, blurry and smeared into a faded, pastel red that he hopes stays on him for days.

Joel swipes gently at your hot, swollen lips and chin, trying to clean you up and calm himself down before you leave the table. At one of the passes of his over your mouth, you lick softly at the pad of his finger. Matching your mood, he sinks his teeth into the fleshy part at the base of your thumb and tugs slightly.

“If we don’t leave in the next minute this whole goddamn bar is gonna see how messy I get when I turn your sweet ass the same colour as your mouth.” He licks then kisses where he had bitten you, making your eyes flutter and thighs press together.

The next half an hour was a blur. You both had the mission to get to your apartment as soon as possible, causing you to move with the most efficiency that four drinks would allow you to.

The Uber ride was the longest of your life.

Joel opened the car door and then slid right in behind you. His large, powerful hands placing you into the middle seat and wrapping the seatbelt around you, clicking it into place. He places his warm hand in the inside of your thigh, unable to keep his hands from you, you did the same, your forearm laying across the top of his thigh, nails scratching softly at the denim.

The alcohol has well and truly gone to your head, making every touch and graze feel heady and dreamlike. Joel was struggling. All night he was craving to be closer to you, holding and restraining himself but now that he’d had a taste it was impossible not to touch you. Trying to maintain his stoicism was less like stopping a yawn or sneeze and more like trying to stop a freight train on a windy day.

In the front, your driver is murmuring along to the radio, but all you can hear is the heavy, warm breathing of the man behind you as you allow him to explore your jean-clad thighs.

Pulling, pushing, kneading, it felt like Joel couldn’t get close enough. The roughness of his touch was full of nothing but need and desire.

You can’t make out everything he’s saying, his whisper is strained and raspy. You can make out the words goddamn and jeans; the lucky fabric achieving their purpose once again.

Your hand covers Joel’s, squeezing and pushing at him, encouraging him to keep going. Whatever devil was inside you wanted to push him to his limits in the back of this cab.

Feeling bold, you allow your palm to push at Joel’s high, travelling further and further up his lap before you stop dangerously close to the giant bulge you can see in the low light of the cab. This wasn’t typical behaviour from you, but the solid warmth of the man under you called to your most primitive nerves.

Dropping your head to Joel’s shoulder, you lean into his neck, leaving sloppy, wet kisses, tinged with light pink, in your wake. Trying your damnedest to hold strong until you get to the apartment.

The walk through the main doors of your apartment building was full of sideways glances and lip bitten chuckles. To have such desire within hours of meeting someone had never happened to you before. It made your skin tingle, all of your senses heightened.

By the time you reach the elevator, you can hardly recognise the darkness in the eyes peering into yours. Fingers interlaced, firm squeezes shoot straight to your clit; Joel’s rough hands somehow able to be strong but reverent at the same time.

Waiting until the doors close, Joel guides you against the brushed steel bar, which reaches the small of your back, and closes you in. His hands hold onto the bar on either side of your hips.

That nagging, rational part of Joel’s brain was screaming at him. He didn’t want any wires crossed or doubts about his intentions about tonight. Sure, he’d had his fair share of one night stands but not for years and certainly not with someone who he’d felt this level of attraction to.

With his knuckle, he ensures your eyes are on him as he hovers his mouth too close to yours. “I need you to know that I didn’t come on this date expectin’ anythin’and I still don’t…” he bows slightly, his forehead rests against yours, and he exhales with a self-fuffacing chuckle.

“I should be a gentleman. I should walk you to your front door, kiss you, and say goodnight.”

But I don’t know if I can, his brain screams at him.

Unmoving, you both share breath in close proximity. The alcohol in your system is dulled by the rush of adrenaline and hormones that are buzzing around your body.

Your teeth latch on to your bottom lip, Joel immediately catches on to the action but squeezes his lids shut, keeping his caveman brain at bay just barely.

The hotness of Joel’s breath fanning over your face has you fantasising about how it’d feel to have it between your legs. You shuffle slightly, squeezing your thighs together and feeling how wet this evening has made you already.

Staying in the electric silence, your chuckle echoes his own. You mimic his actions, moving your forehead, pressing the knuckle of your forefinger under his chin, encouraging him to lift it so that you can look him in the eyes.

“Joel, I’ve got some good news for ya…” The elevator dings, opening its metal doors at your floor. You let your grasp of his chin fall so you can wriggle free of his hold and lead the way to your apartment. “You might be a gentleman, but I’m not.”

Exiting the elevator slowly, you emphasise the movement of your hips as you lead the way through the carpeted hallway to your door. Joel follows closely, admiring the view with hearts in his eyes. Pausing for the briefest of moments, he exhales fully, palming himself, squeezing to elevate the ache at the base of his cock before catching up to you.

Twisting the key in the lock, you ram the door with your hips once, twice. “C’mon cockblocker” you ram it again, somehow the combination works, gaining you access to your apartment and a sideways glance from Joel which reads ‘we’ll deal with this later’.

With unfathomable accuracy, you throw your keys into the dish by your door and shrug off Joel’s leather jacket, which he kindly lent you, hanging it by the door.

At your back, you feel the Texan man push his hips into your ass. His fingers slide through your belt loops, giving him more purchase and momentum as you lead the way down the hall to your bedroom. His lips kiss softly at your neck, inhaling your scent before exhaling with a rumble. “Can you feel that, darlin’? Feel how fuckin’ hard you make me?” He punctuates with another pump of his hips.

A playful chuckle passes your lips as you turn on your heel so that you are facing him. Bravely, you press your palm firmly against the thickness under his jeans.

A flush starts at the base of your spire and carries up to the tips of your ears, as you feel how hard he is. His eyes flutter close, a deep groan reverberating from his throat as your breathing gets heavier. “Oh fuck, you’re big.” You rush out, that brain-to-mouth filter experiencing technical difficulties.

Joel threads his fingers through your hair, his palm cradling your head, the other grabbing at your full hip. His big brown eyes glimmer in the low light of the room as he scans your full face, stopping at your lips before flicking back up to match your gaze. “I believe in you, sweetheart. I think you can take it.” A sideways smirk, gifted to him by horny demon, swipes across his full lips.

Bringing your lips to his once again, the kiss is feverish, missing all of the earnestness of your first. Joel licks into your mouth deeply, his tongue gliding along yours, your breaths mixing together, making the air balmy.

Almost simultaneously you reach for his belt buckle and he your top button, the soft clink of metal on metal making your pussy clench.

He coaxes you backwards, prodding you to lay down on the bed as you begin working the buttons of your shirt.

Reaching behind himself, he tugs on the collar of his shirt, pulling it over his head in one swoop. His body is a wall of soft muscle- not created at a gym but through honest hard work. Freckles speckled down his arms and across his chest- you want to trail a path with your tongue.

“These jeans laced with black magic or somethin? Had me hallucinatin’ from the minute I saw you at that bar.” He peels them down in a see-saw motion. Joel kisses down the roundness of your hips and thighs as they are revealed little by little as he goes one on one with the denim.

Before long, jeans, shirts, and shoes are cast to the outskirts of the room. You lay before him in a blue matching set- the heft of your tits barely confined. Giving them a squeeze, your smaller hands barely cover them, the pillowy flesh spilling over the spaces in between your fingers.

Joel’s eyes go directly to them, a slanted smile sweeping across his face before he lowers his lips to the roundness of your stomach.

Licking, kissing, inhaling the scent that he assumed was your perfume lingers heavy on the plumpness of your soft skin. Travelling lower and lower, Joel settles himself, kneeling on the floor before you, eyes settled on the damp patch spreading on the gusset of your panties.

With forearms hooked under your thighs and hands resting on top Joel yanks you towards him, his beautiful hooked nose laying on the wet fabric as he inhales. “Fuck me.” He whispers into your mound.

Hooking his fingers around the fabric, his eyes flick up to yours for permission. Bumping up onto your forearms for a better view, you smile wickedly, crooking your neck to the side. “Let’s see how messy you can get, pretty.”

Joel all but rips the lace garment, whisking it downwards, past your knees before he hovers his mouth just above your pussy, close enough that his breath tickles against the soft hairs. Tongue first, he places wet kisses on just north of where you want him the most.

Instinctively, your hips raise, eliciting a dark chuckle from him. “Goddamn you’ve got a pretty pussy.” He shifts you so that your legs lay over his shoulders and freeing up his hands to push apart your folds, allowing him to see your swollen clit.

With a flat tongue, Joel licks almost too tenderly at the soft, dewy skin before swooping languidly over and over your bud. “Oh my god.” You moan, willing your hips to stay still and stop being so greedy, allow this man to cook.

“Never been called that before.” he mumbles, bringing the sides of his cheeks together, gathering his saliva in his mouth and then letting it fall to your clit. You were already soaked but Joel needed to see you dripping, messy. You moan, the lewd act making your eyes roll back.

Although being caught up in the desperation you had for each other, Joel needed to take inventory of every twitch, roll, and moan passing through your sweet, soft form. There was no way that he was taking tonight as a solitary event, already craving how you’d moan and whimper for him when you allowed him to fuck you bare.

Gently, he pulled at the apex of your pussy with one hand, pulling at the hood of your clit to unsheath it fully, before circling it with deep, even pressure with his opposite thumb. “You are fucking soaked, sweeheart.” Your breathing gets heavier, you’re unable to open your eyes fully, but you’re not willing to miss a second of this guy at work.

Joel incorporates his mouth, slurping and swallowing as if you were ice cream threatening melt right under him. Threading your fingers through his messy hair you push and pull at his fluffy curls, your heels digging in just at his shoulder blades to encourage him, more.

Feeling him chuckle,he presses into you deeper, his lips and tongue now licking into your pussy which flutters and pulses around his tongue. With each movement of his jaw you feel his beautiful nose bump and swipe across your clit, that familiar buzz at the base of your spine growing stronger and stronger. “Fuck, Joel keep going, it feels so fucking good…”

Hearing his name as a moan on your lips, strokes the most primitive part of him. He needs to be closer, deeper, before he comes in his pants like a teenager.

Somehow finding the strength to peel himself from you, he stands, his cock aching and hard as stone. There’s a clear, darkened patch on his boxers which steals your attention for a second before it moves slowly to his hand squeezing at himself. “I gotta get you ready sweetheart. Gotta be inside you.” He shucks his boxers off himself and pumps his cock in his hand.

Resuming his earlier position, Joel gathers your slick with his middle and ring finger before pushing them in slowly to your weeping pussy.

“Shit”

“Mmmmmfuck”

Groaning in unison, you swear you see Joel’s eyes flutter in the way yours are as you squeeze against his fingers. Joel flexes his digits, sweeping the pad of his thumb across your beautifully swollen clit to tandem with his fingers.

Shifting your hips, you rock yourself on his fingers, allowing your big tits to bounce and ripple in harmony. Opening your eyes, you can see him jerk his heavy, weeping cock at the same pace as he pumps into you, the strong expanse of his forearm tensed with chorded muscle. The view getting you closer and closer by the second.

“Think you can take more? I know your sweet pussy is gonna milk me dry.” Joel stretches his fingers inside of you, licking his lips, his eyes glued to your own.

Never have you had a man talk to you like this during sex. Often, your background music to get off was either the squeak of the bed frame or the buzz of your pocket bff after you were laying, disappointed, in a wet patch in your bed.

“Oh, you like me talking to you, don’t ya? You like it when I tell you how tight your cunt is, hm?” Joel’s upper body is covered in a small sheen of sweat, his fingers somehow able to quicken and maintain the even pressure.

“I’m gonna come, fuck.” Your hips grind harder, movements in tandem with Joel’s allowing your big tits to jiggle and ripple.

A familiar warmth spreads through your pelvis and hips, growing higher and higher flushing to the tips of your ears.

Joel, praying so hard that he doesn’t come, stops jerking himself, instead lowering his body so that he can drink your sweetness from the source. “That’s it. Good girl. Come all over me.” He speaks into your sopping wet pussy. Through thick lashes, he peers over the soft valleys of your stomach and hips, his tongue and fingers not stopping but calming to a slow, steady motion.

Ears still ringing, you prop yourself back on your elbows once more, enjoying the view of the southern man, eyes closed kitten licking at your pulsing hole.

In feeling your muscles flex in movement, his eyes pop open. He pulls his fingers from you, holding them in front of his face and scissoring his first two fingers, examining the silky wetness of your come. Without show or performance he places them in his mouth, past his knuckle in order to finish his meal.

Not wanting to waste another minute without him inside of you, you extend yourself, reaching to the top drawer of your night stand, grabbing a box of condoms and rattling them in his direction.

“I think twelve times might be ambitious but I’ll sure give it a go.” The flirty twinkle in his eye makes you cock your head to the side, giving him an over exaggerated eyeroll. He grabs the package from you, using his teeth to perforate the cellophane and pry open the untouched box.

Pumping his length a few times, Joel scans your entire body; toes, knees, thighs all the way to the undoubtably frizzy fucked curls framing your face. “You are the sexiest woman I’ve ever seen in my life.” It’s not until he finishes the sentence that you look up at his face, meeting his gaze that was waiting for your eyes. He slides the lubed condom over his shaft before joining you, kneeling between your parted thighs on the bed.

Biting your lip, you watch his actions in earnest, allowing his words to settle on your skin. Although never the best at taking compliments, this was not one you wanted to deflect. This beautiful, strong, southern man was looking at you with reverence and you were determined to believe it, if only for tonight.

Lowering himself on one elbow, he reaches your leg with his other arm, hooking it over the sturdy angle of his hips, his eyes never leaving yours.

Sweetly, his lips find yours, having that gentle quality that you shared in the bar. Pulling back only slightly, his eyes peer south, grabbing the base of his cock and rubbing it up and down the wetness of your slick, tap tap tapping it on your now engorged clit.

On your gasp, his eyes dilate further, unable to keep that goddamn slanted smile off his face.

Only in this moment have you noticed that when he smiles, he does with his whole face. Yes, his lips move but also his cheeks, creating a domino effect on his eyes, crinkled at the side, and the soft raising of his ears. Fuck, he was handsome.

It was your turn to peer down, looking at the way his cock was teasing you. Cheekily, you manoeuvre your hips, making the tip of his cock, notch against your cunt, causing Joel to swallow a moan and for you to smirk. “C’mon pretty, I wanna feel you stretch me with that big dick of yours.” You circle your hips, trying to make him do it again.

Leveraging your leg on his hip to raise your hips higher, he sinks into you, slowly, inch by inch until he is seated fully. Eyes cemented on yours as your smirk turns into a moan.

“Jesus Christ”

“Fuck, Joel”

Joel held still for a moment, the hand that secured your leg over your hip sweeping up and down the expanse of your thigh. “Damn you’re fucking tight.” His lips lower, licking and kissing over your collarbone and neck, the sweetness of your perfume now musky, mixing with your sweat.

As he pumps his hips with long, deep strokes, you thanked the sex gods that he had a pretty face and a pretty dick. His cock was big and thick, stretching you and making you feel beautifully full, fuller than you ever had been.

Working your hips, you moved in parallel with Joel. Pulling your hips back into the mattress when he pushed his pulsing length deep inside, bridging your hips upwards when he retreated. You didn’t want there to be a moment when he wasn’t inside you, moulding your pussy to fit his perfect size.

Joel slants his lips against yours, not waiting to push his tongue deep and long against your own. It wasn’t controlled, it was sloppy and wet, your hand threading through his hair and pulling at the disheveled strands.

The taste of him, mixed with your come and the faint memory of whisky had you rolling your eyes. It was desperate, reckless, kissing someone you barely know like this, like your life depended on it.

Pulling back, he arranges you, one leg still wrapped around his hip and the other raised up, ankle on his broad, freckled shoulders. “This okay?” His eyes, somehow wider, looking for any change in your expression, ensuring you’re comfortable.

You answer with your heels digging into his shoulder and the small of his back, pulling him into you. He feels bigger this way, his cock able to get deeper, on some strokes kissing that detonate button buried deep inside you.

It’s almost as if you forget how to breathe as he gets faster, the hair on his thighs and lower stomach now glistening with your slick as they rub against you.

Joel lifts you higher, allowing him access to grab at your ass, spreading it slightly, making your head spin and pussy flutter. “That’s it. Cmon, baby. I need to feel you come over my cock.”

This feels primal, biological; as if this night, this moment was written in the fabric of your DNA. Meant to happen.

With your eyes rolling back, you give over your body, surrendering to the will and strength of this man. Joel, feeling that he could combust at any moment looks skyward, willing his body to endure this sweetness for longer.

Bringing his thumb to your poor, swollen clit, Joel rubs in quick, deep circles, his pelvis and hips stuttering as he feels his impending orgasm.

“Fuck yes.” You come, eyes rolling, toes curling and pussy squeezing against the heavy cock inside of you. Your eyes snap shut, your jaw clenches as Joel continues to pump in and out of your spent pussy.

“Mmmmmmfuck” you peel yourself from ecstasy long enough to see Joel come. Each beautiful angle and muscle on his body tensing, his eyes scanning over your flushed face, that smile of his appearing again.

Inching towards you, he kisses you sweetly, the curls at the nape of his neck getting curlier by the second. His giant palm rests on your cheek, deepening the kiss slightly, running his thumb over your jaw.

It doesn’t take long for you both to get cleaned up. You grabbing the oversized T-shirt that lay dormant under your pillow and him finding his boxers in the far corner of the room.

A conversation isn’t had about whether Joel should sleepover or not, instead you fall into each other again; kissing, biting, licking, unable to stop but too tired and a little drunk to take it further.

An ungodly vibration on wood wakes you from the best sleep you’ve had in months. Shooting up in bed, you immediately regret your pace, your head tender from the night before.

Scanning your surroundings for a minute, a little seed of disappointment plants itself when you realise you’re alone, no Texan man in sight.

You swipe across the screen, putting your phone on loud speaker before you faceplant back into your pillow.

“Hello?”

”Good morning, princess.” You can hear the sarcasm dripping from your best friend’s voice. “I was gonna call you last night to see how your date went with the contractor but I’m guessing due to my 5 unread texts that it went quite well, hm?”

Stretching your body like a cat in the sun, you grab your phone and lay it on the pillow next to you, feeling like you’re at a sleepover.

“It went well, yeah.” You hear the smile through your voice before you realise it’s there. “He is so fucking hot, got that Mr Darcy stoic thing about him but he is definitely a dark horse.” You turn to lay on your tummy. “Honestly, it got to just about closing time at the bar and I didn’t want it to end. We got back to my place and he went full fucking caveman. And his dick is fucking gian-“

Your soul leaves your body as you hear a hoarse throat clear. Flipping around you see a fully clothed Joel with two cups of coffee hovering at the threshold of your bedroom door. With no notice you hang up the phone, shoving it somewhere in the bed before sitting upright.

“I hope you don’t mind, I didn’t want to subject you to the uncaffeinated version of me too early.” His movements are slow, shy almost as he hands over the cup and perches himself on the side of your bed.

“I thought you pulled an Irish goodbye on me.” You take a long sip, peering over the ceramic as you drink, the sarcasm shield firmly intact.

“And miss seeing your Cookie Monster T-shirt in the daylight? I don’t think so.” He teases, reaching for the hem of your shirt which grazes your mid thigh.

“I had a lot of fun last night.” He rests his giant warm palm on your leg, his brown eyes almost doe like.

“Me too. Think you finally broke my curse of bad dates, pretty.” You set the mug on your nightstand.

Joel flushes at the nickname, immediately taking him back to last night's events. Placing his mug next to yours, he scoots forward, cradling your jaw and placing a sweet, chaste kiss on your lips.

Unable to resist, he deepens the kiss. His big fingers thread through the mess of tangled curls as his breathing becomes heavier.

Pulling away, he keeps your faces close together as he scans your sleepy features. A goofy looking grin works its way across his face as he chuckles softly.

“What?”

He shakes his head softly, the smirk not letting up. “Can I have your number?”

Your head bows slightly, falling to rest on his broad chest as a silent laugh works its way through your shoulders. The sex last night was incredible, not the typical first time timidness so the thought of this man not having your number seems so ridiculous.

Joel presses a kiss into your hair, inhaling that scent that now makes something stir at the base of his spine.

Sunday afternoon rolled in slowly. Joel stayed for a hearty breakfast of cocoa puffs before heading back home, the impression of him lasting through the sweet ache in between your thighs.

Your current boyfriend, the high fairy king, had just slayed the mortal who spoke ill of his mate as a notification pops up on your phone from the Texan himself.

[image attached]

damn, that looks so good

I’m jealous

Last night work you up an appetite?

certainly did

it is good

but it’s got nothing on what I ate last night

The smile on your face had your cheeks hurting. Last night was not a normal first date. The level of attraction and passion you’d felt was nothing you’d ever experienced.

Rolling your head to rest on the top of your couch, you can’t imagine any date going better than your one with Joel. It makes you anxious but in a way where it feels like butterflies in your stomach.

Before you can reply to Joel your phone pings again, but this time the message from your best friend.

Okay gentleman Joel might’ve been good but just wait for first date number two before you make up your mind.

This is Javier. 🙂‍↕️😮‍💨😚😋🫠

Clearing your throat you look at the image of date number two.

Think I should give him a shot.

For science. 🙂‍↕️🤓

npt/ tag list 🏷️ @gothcsz @chasingthepoguelife @mandaloriankait @probablyreadinsmut @half-moon16 @brittmb115 @noisynightmarepoetry @maried01 @witchy-and-persnickity @drunk-and-capable @angiewatson @toshatoshalopez @qutequeersstuff @indiegirlunited @jolalibrary @sheepdogchick @regularjoel @iknowisoundcrazy

#pedro pascal #joel miller smut #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller x plus size reader #joel miller fic #joel miller fanfic #modern day au #modern day Joel miller #plus size reader #tlou fanfic #Joel Miller #fic!thenextsevendates #cuppajoelfic

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arimiadev · 3 months ago

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Steam's 2025 Visual Novel Fest is abysmal.

for the past few years, perhaps as a way to appease the thousands of visual novel developers for the poor search abilities on Steam or perhaps to get more money from the thousands of porn games on the platform, Valve has hosted an annual Visual Novel Fest, a week-long event "promoting" visual novels on Steam. this event has always been questionably helpful to developers, but this year I believe takes the cake.

context: I'm a visual novel developer. I also help other VN studios with steam stuff. so I interface with steam's backend and these sorts of things.

first off, the requirements. if we go to their publicly available steamworks documentation, we can see the eligibility requirements here:

basically:

Reading is the primary gameplay

The player cannot walk around, and can typically only look around from a static position

There is no combat - if there is fighting, the gameplay loop is a small portion of the game. Multiple outcomes leading to different plot events is allowed.

makes sense, right? except some fantastic visual novels like of the Devil, Date Time, and others were rejected from the festival.

okay, so maybe they're being incredibly strict with their definition of a visual novel—

as usual from previous years, some games that are wildly not visual novels are included in the festival. well, there's probably a thousand or so games in the festival, so some will always slip through the cracks, but at least the rest of the festival is alright, right?

the main tabs for the festival up top are:

Featured

Browse Games

Browse Adult Only Games

Free to Play

Free Demos

Upcoming

every tab except for Free to Play and Upcoming only feature games that are for sale AND discounted. if your game is released and in the festival but not discounted, it is shown nowhere unless a steam user scrolls through the giant wall of "All" games (which is mostly filtered by popularity).

Free Demos? no, that only shows discounted games as well. (a lot of the games in this fest are daz 3d "visual novels")

well, at least there's an "Upcoming" tab to share visual novels that haven't been released, right? no. that big, main tab only has 1 widget - Popular Upcoming. for some reason, they didn't populate the tab with any other widgets like the others, which have sections for Horror, Otome, LGBT+, etc.

this also means that only 22 unreleased games are actually getting space in the entire festival.

now, there is one exception to this - if users scroll all the way down on any of the tabs, there's a "Browse Games" widget that lets them filter and see every game in the festival. but this is just the Steam search section, nothing groundbreaking.

but it does allows users to see all of the visual novels in the festival and not just the featured few - mine can only be seen if you do some filtering in this search section.

so this VN Fest has become nothing more than a VN Sale - I don't know why they don't just call it that. nowhere in the documentation did it say you have to discount games in order to be actually featured in it, and as usual indie devs are given the shortest end of the stick from Valve.

...all of this is to say....

go play visual novels on itchio

35k+ visual novels on itchio!! can you imagine playing even half that many? and so many of them are free and made lovingly by sickos. go find some wonderfully weird or creatively romantic visual novels to play today.

#visual novels #steam festival #game dev #indie games

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pyract0 · 3 months ago

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╰┈➤Loving you

☪Valentines special with hsr characters! ☪Includes: Jing yuan, Dan heng, Sunday, Aventurine, Boothill, Blade+ Three special guests! ☪Know I said probably top 3 from the vote but had ideas for more. ☪Warnings: Mostly just fluff/ romance, Non gendered/ specified, lowkey just kinda cute. Established relationships in most. You get given gifts/ flowers, I just like flowers :( ☪Kinda late post, ended up being busy yesterday when I planned to post!

╰┈➤-`♡´- Jing yuan

A smaller hand wrapped around your fingers as the young teenager dragged you through the Xianzhou Lufou, not being able to stop yourself from chuckling at the boys antics. Leaves and twigs had gotten snagged in his blond hair, but he paid it no mind as he dragged you somewhere. His "super important secret mission" as he had told you when you inquired about what he was doing.

As you ran up a final hill you entered a garden, flowering bushes neatly pruned with much care. In the distance a familiar figure caught your attention, back turned to you but identifiable by the fluffy white hair and signature red ribbon sectioning it. Yanqing made a bee line for the man, pulling you along by the firm grasp that remained on your hand. As soon as you both stepped within earshot, the teen started calling out to the much older man. "Ah general! I got them!" The boy released your hand as he walked back along your trail after getting an appreciative nod from the man, leaving the both of you alone in a momentary, comforting silence. You moved towards Jing yuan, watching him turn as he held a bouquet of chrysanthemums outstretched towards you, pushing the tied stems into your raised hands. Shades of red, pink and orange gleamed in your eyes as you admired the flowers, holding them close to your chest. Jing yuan watched in amusement at your actions, stepping to your side and offering his arm. Your arm snaked around his bicep, hand firmly setting on the muscle. "Happy valentines, Shall we go darling? I've already made some plans for this evening." You couldn't resist his charming smile as you moved into step with him, walking under the golden hues of the sunset. You could hear his boots click against the stone path you both occupied, making the atmosphere feel more genuine over a the dreamish feel it held. It was simply.. breath-taking. You stopped outside a restaurant, the building simple but held a sentimental reminder to you both. The pale blue walls were unmistakeable, the old wallpaper peeling at the corner. It was where you had your first date all those years ago, Jing yuan having panicked and bought you to the worn out restaurant that was close to your house, yet you loved every moment of it. After all, he tried and that's all that mattered. Your palm slowly ran down his arm, taking it upon yourself to instead intertwine your fingers with his, feeling the cold metal of his wedding ring against the warm flesh of your hand. It served as a constant reminder that he was yours, that he truly loved you more than what words could convey. And you loved him too.

╰┈➤୨♡୧ Dan heng

The dark haired man stood in front of the closed door deep in thought, hands tightly clenching the poor flowers that sat at his mercy. He was kind of new to the whole romance idea, but with the encouragement of his pinkette friend he went along with her ideas. The longer he stood in the dimly lit hallway the further his mind spiraled. Did you even like flowers? What if you didn't accept them?

Dan heng let out an displeased sigh, wiping his clammy hand against his pants before knocking against your door. He could hear soft thuds through the thick wood, a yelp following a particularly loud one as your footsteps vibrated slightly through the floor. The pulled the door open, meeting deep cerulean eyes that seemed to be reading your every move. You blinked a few times at the man before you, rubbing your eyes yet he didn't leave your vision. Well you both got along, you weren't the closest two on the express, yet here he stood before you clutching a handful of flowers like it was the only thing grounding him. You could hear him clear his throat as he diverted his gaze from your own, opting to look over your shoulder instead. His words came out unsteady as he offered the white bundle towards you. "uhm, happy valentines. March told me to give you flowers cause I like... you?" You watched the usually composed man internally panic, statement forming into a question as it neared the end. It made him sound unsure, but he was confident with how he felt. Yet he struggled to voice it with the same sentiment. Dan heng Watched as his words finally clicked in your mind, a small smile reaching the genuine look of admiration behind your eyes. You hugged the mess of stems against you as you thanked him over and over, head lowering momentarily. He couldn't stop the surprised sound that slipped from his throat as you pecked him on the cheek, turning quickly to retreat to your mostly dark room, lit up by only a simple lantern. You returned moments later, flowers now replaced with a small dragon plush. He watched as you forced the stuffed toy towards him, gently grabbing it from your hold as you dropped your arms to your sides. "I got it for you, it reminded me of you a lot. It's really cute." Dan heng Looked at the plushie owlishly, meeting it's beady eyes that matched the colour of his own. His hand came to ruffle your hair, ushering you back into your bedroom as it was still significantly earlier than you would normally be up. "Thank you for it, I'll be sure to keep it safe." And he meant every word of it, considering it wat you who gifted him.

╰┈➤˚ʚ♡��˚ Sunday

You sat on the large bed that centered the room, waiting for the winged man to return. You watched in silence as the sun began to set past the half closed blinds, hand tightening around the small object in your grasp. You did a onceover of your gift you had picked out, worried about it not being enough despite the thought that went into the personalisation. You flinched at hearing the hard wood door creak open, watching as the halovian stepped into the room, pushing it closed behind him. You were click to close your hand around the golden object, standing to greet him. Sunday met your eyes as he gave you a loving smile, arms wrapping around your waist as you returned his embrace. He placed a gentle kiss on your forehead before releasing you, stepping back. You watched as he dug through the pocket of his coat, pulling out a small object. His fist wrapped around it before he hovered it over your unoccupied and opened palm, dropping the reflective object into your grasp. "Happy valentines day angel. It isn't much but it reminded me of you, there's a photo of us I placed in there with room for another." The locket in your hand was soothing against your heated skin, being able to see small engravings of something akin to flowers in the metallic casing. You stared at the object in awe before remembering what you held wrapped in your fist, quickly bursting into laughter in front of your lover. He panicked at your sudden outburst, raising his arms and stuttering out words you couldn't comprehend. Your lowered arm moved in front of him, opening your hand to reveal the golden locket you had picked out for him. Sunday looked shocked at the gift you offered to him, a small pair of wings adorning the object. He opened the small clasp, looking at the two photos that fit perfectly within the frames. "I know you miss her still, so I made sure to add her in it too. Just so she's always with you." Your words hit him hard, looking between the photo of you both and the one of his adored younger sister. The months since his departure felt like years, being separated from her for the first time in their life, this time forever. Sunday wrapped his arms around you again, this time pulling you tight against his chest as his head met your shoulder. Your free hand moved to his nape, running your hand up through his grey hair. You could hear him gently mumble his gratitude against your skin. He carefully pulled away from you, hands still on your waist as his lips met your own. He considered himself lucky that you stood by his side, past all his wrong doings as he found himself on his personalised path to redemption. You cared for him like no other, loving him like he was the most precious thing to you. And to him, you were worth being labelled his most precious possession.

╰┈➤ ♠︎♦️♠︎ Aventurine

You sat on your shared bed, blankets messy from your sleep. The orange hues from the sunrise shone through the glass behind you, the warmth radiating through the room. You found yourself looking around the room in a state of confusion, being amplified by the drowsiness that still remained clouding your mind. Where is he? Your bedroom door was pushed open before you could ponder further, Aventurine stepping into the room with a tray balanced on his bare hand, usual black gloves discarded on his bedside cabinet. His top remained half unbuttoned from last night, letting the silky material drape off his shoulder instead of fixing it. He carefully placed the tray on your lap, shuffling under the covers beside you, arm moving to wrap around your back and settle on your waist. A mixed array of different foods sat neatly arranged, some shaped into hearts with a small cup of juice placed on the far corner. "Didn't know what you wanted so made you a bit of everything, Happy valentines love." He watched you silently as you ate, fingers rubbing circles into your hip as he leaned into you. You looked at him in slight confusion, simply observing as you ate instead of getting himself food like you expected. Instead he served you your breakfast in bed and just waited patiently for you to finish. Aventurine ran his fingers through his sandy-blond hair, turning to you at the feeling of your gaze on the side of his head. He opened his mouth to say something, but was quickly interrupted as you shoved the pancake on the end of your fork into his mouth, syrup spilling on his parted lips. Your face moved towards his as he slowly chewed on the fluffy sweet treat in his mouth, cocking a brow as his magenta-cyan eyes met yours. He felt your tongue glide over his lower lip, cleaning off the sticky substance before resuming your meal. He blinked a few times as he processed the loss of feeling, chuckling as he gently pressed his lips against the side of your head, breathing in the scent of your hair. "Don't be too long baby, I have something I want to do with you later." He watched as you happily nodded, imagining the way your legs would kick back and forwards if you were sat on a chair. You began to lean into his side, head resting on his chest as he ran his hands up and down your side. He took pride in his wealth, yet he'd give it all up to spend the rest of his life with you.

╰┈➤• ➵ ✩ Boothill

Cold metalic hands rested on your face, covering your eyes as you followed the raspy voice that guided your steps. You could feel your feet leave the familiar steel of the ship, stepping onto softer ground as you kept moving forward. A sweet aroma reached your nose, causing confusion to spark. Just where was he leading you? You suddenly were forced to stop as the cyborg behind you halted in his movements, counting to 3 before lifting his hands from your face. After your eyes focused to the bright light of the area, you gazed over the field of iridescent flowers, all shades of the rainbow clashing in something so beautiful yet chaotic. You let out a shocked sound akin to a gasp, crouching to feel the soft petal of a flower between your fingertips. Boothill grinned behind you, sharp teeth almost radiating light as they reflecting the rays from the sun. He pulled his hat off his head, instead placing it on yours as you rose to your feet again. "Found it when chasin' one of 'em muddlefudgers, thought ya might like it sweetheart." He took a step back from you, turning as he pulled his phone from his pocket. You watched as he aggressively whispered into the device, trying to get something through the voice recording. You waited patiently for the cowboy to finish messing with the device, watching him struggle and release a string of censored curses. After a few moments a gentle melody started playing, a familiar song of the piano you both adored. He turned up the volume enough to be heard when the phone was returned to it's place. Boothill offered his hand, pulling you to sway with him when you grasped it, his other hand dropping to your waist. Your hand moved to his shoulder, stepping in time with him as you both moved in harmony. You followed the familiar steps, careful to avoid stepping on the flowers that bloomed around the field. His hand raised higher above your head, spinning you around before catching you by the waist when you fell back. He straightened you up, hand moving to pull his hat back as he placed a tender kiss against your lips. You couldn't help but be reminded of your wedding, a small but heart felt celebration being held on your home planet. Even if the memories of the night were tarnished, the both of you still held onto the dance from that night, treating it as your own little tradition. No matter how many years were to pass, he would still choose to do it every anniversary.

╰┈➤♱✮♱ Blade

You sat on the couch in the corner of Kafka's room, watching as looked over another article of clothing. You sat in a mess of an outfit, half formal and half casual as she decided on the rest of what you should wear. You were unsure why, but all you knew was this was gonna be the death of you. A bundle of clothing hit your face as she pushed you into her bathroom, telling you to put on what she had chosen out. You had to admit it was nice, yet you still remained oblivious to the true intentions behind her dolling you up. When you re-entered the bedroom, she was no where to be seen. You opted to walk out and look for her, instead running into your partner. Blade Looked you up and down, his dark blue-red Ombre hair falling over his eyes. Instead of his usual attire, he wore a black suit, looking messily put on. He looked annoyed as he took your hand, tugging you down the long corridor towards the exit of the base. He gave a displeased grunt when you failed to fall into step with him, slowing his movements to match your pace. "Kafka told me to take you out to dinner, hurry up or we'll be late." You gave him a look of confusion before remembering the holiday, realising what was happening. A smug grin etched onto your face as you wrapped your arm around his, leaning against him obnoxiously. "Oh, do I get a date? Well aren't you just the sweetest guy ever." Blade glared at you as he forced you to walk faster, grumbling to you to not get used to it. You both stopped when you reached his car, the reflective red gleaming in the overhead lights. You pushed you by between your shoulder blades to the passenger side, opening your door for you. You took your seat before the pushed the door shut, moving to his own side again as you strapped yourself in. One hand sat on the wheel after the car started up, the other resting against your thigh with a gentle squeeze as he pulled out, driving towards his chosen destination. His crimson eyes left the road, meeting yours as he trusted the auto driving mechanism to not fail. He leaned his face towards yours, pressing his lips against yours before moving to your neck, repeating the action. "You look nice though, suits you darling."

he moved his attention back to the road, speeding down the highway towards his chosen restaurant, being none other than your favourite. If it wasn't for the damn reservation Kafka bought, he'd rather be at home with you in his arms.

Bonus characters:

╰┈➤ʚ୨୧⋆ɞ Robin

You waited backstage for a certain halovian, listening to her voice as it echoed from where she was preforming. As sat leaning against a crate, a small gift bag in one hand neatly organised to her liking. Though you couldn't take all the credit, haven gotten in contact with her brother to know her favourite flower, having failed to have her mention it in idle conversation. A wrapped bouquet rested against the top of the wood behind you, bundles of small iridescent flowers with a purple hue slightly ruffled from your quickened pace as to not be late. You heard the music from the theatre come to an end, round of applause sounding as Robin's angelic voice came to an end. You watched as the flocked, red curtains were pushed aside, purple hair bouncing as she rushed down the steps. The sound of her heels clicking reached your ears as she made her way to you, arms wrapping around your neck as you placed on hand on the small of her back. Her emerald eyes met yours as she leaned back, giving you a small greeting. You grabbed the wrapped stems of the flowers, offering the items in your now full hands to the angel before you. "Happy valentines dove, you were amazing out there." You gave her a genuine smile, falling off guard when she threw herself back into your arms, chants of gratitude being spoken for your ears alone. Releasing you from her embrace, she let the bundle of flowers rest in the crook of her elbow, using her spare hand to pull the contents from the bag. A black box sat in her open palm, being opened to reveal a pearl necklace, specifically chosen to match her preowned bracelet. As she looked at you, you carefully took the necklace from her gloved hand, moving her hair to the side to clasp it around her neck. You gently repositioned her hair, running your fingers through the strands to brush it out. Robin gave you a look of defeat, a partial look of guilt on her face while she pouted. "I'll get your present to you as soon as we get home darling, I didn't think to bring it with me here." She shook her head, wrapping her arm around yours as she started walking towards the exit, wings fluttering blissfully. As she walked hand in hand with you, she couldn't help but think of what to get you next time, wanting to make it special. Because in the end, you were her freedom. ╰┈➤✩ ♬ ✩ Serval

You sat on the bench in the Neverwinter workshop, legs crossed, waiting for your girlfriends return. You tinkered with a small gadget she had left beside you, trying to figure out it's purpose while being mindful of it's fragile nature. Lost in thought, you failed to process the sound of the door squeaking open, nor the sound of footsteps that advanced towards you. Serval came up beside you, hands wrapping around your waist as she leaned against you, looking over your shoulder at what you were messing with. You flinched at the sudden cold hands that placed themselves around you, turning to meet cerulean eyes. She picked up the bundle of flowers she dropped on the bench behind you, offering them with a fond smile. "Here ya go sweetheart, happy valentines." Her face returned to your side as you placed the device back where you got it, hand moving to run through the coloured streaks of her hair. You untangled your legs as you moved them off the surface, thighs resting on either side of Serval as her arms wrapped tightly around your waist, face pressed against your chest as you massaged her scalp. You sat in a comforting silence, basking in each others presence, gently rocking back and forwards. The blaring sound of her ringtone echoed throughout the enclosed space, causing her to groan as she pulled herself from your embrace. She aggressively tapped her painted nails against the screen, scrolling to see the notification from her younger brother. She loved him wholeheartedly, but she stood wanting to strangle him for disrupting her time with you. You hopped off the desk, moving to walk behind her as she rushed around the workshop, grabbing things you couldn't name and shoving them in a random bag she grabbed off the rack. She slung it over her shoulder after zipping it up, turning to you with a look of guilt. "Sorry lovely, gotta go fix another generator, those useless engineers just can't grasp my design. I'll take you to dinner later, yeah?" Your hands dropped to her waist, placing a tender kiss on her lips that she quickly leaned into. When she pulled away, her hand raised to ruffle your hair quickly, giving a lazed wave as she began to walk towards the front entrance. As soon as she was done, she was going to give you the date you deserved. Even after dating since she was a researcher for the architects, she would still give you her everything. Because you were the one who stood beside her all those years ago

╰┈➤🎸⋆⭒˚ Gepard

You watched as the snowflakes fell, landing against the cobbled streets of Belobog, melting upon contact with the heated stone. You made your way towards the small restaurant agreed upon with your lover. the small wrapped presents sat in your bag, resting to your side as you saw the diner come into view. You came to a stop outside, deciding to wait for him before going inside. It didn't take long before heavy footsteps came towards your direction, the sound of armour clashing together sounding out. You watched as the blond man came to a halt before you, taking a moment to catch his breath before sputtering out an apology, offering you the bouquet of ball peony's in his grasp. "For you my love, happy valentines." Gepard gave you an apologetic, but charming smile as you took them from him, apologising for his tardiness. You pulled him inside the cosy building, out of the blistering cold of your planet. You both ordered a warm drink, moving to sit in the far corner due to the lack of customers.

You both fell into a small chat until your drinks came, taking a quick sip that made a satisfied sigh fall from your parted lips. You never really did get used to the cold, the warmth of your drink radiating and heating your hands. You placed your drink back on the small saucer it came on, reaching into your bag to pull out the first present, a small 1 marked on it. You passed the rectangular gift to Gepard, trying not to let a mischievous grin form on your face. He slowly unwrapped it, only ripping the paper when necessary. When the cover came into view, he paused, a displeased look plastered on his face as he stared at you. Singing for dummies. You let out a low chuckle before reaching back into your bag, handing him the actual present you had chosen for the man. This gift was smaller, but upon opening it you could see a shimmer in his blue eyes. With the help of his sisters, you managed to compile a folder of photos for the sentimental man. A collection of memories of you four. Gepard delicately took your hand, placing a tender kiss to the back before setting your hand on the table, not releasing it from his hold. The thick padding of his glove wasn't uncomfortable like initially imagined, instead being oddly comforting, like a constant reminder of his will to protect you. Because you were his world, and he would forever be your shield.

#honkai star rail x reader #honkai starrail x reader #hsr x reader #hsr x y/n #hsr x you #sunday x reader #boothill x reader #honkai star rail x you #jing yuan x reader #blade x reader #gepard x reader #serval x reader #robin x reader #robin x reader hsr #aventurine x reader

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nemisuki · 15 days ago

Text

𐔌✧.* ᗷᖇᗩᗯᒪ .ᐟ ֹ ₊ ꒱

ೀ⋆ || Your boyfriend is a little mean to others, but never to you, after all he’d fight your enemies ❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

. ♬ ݁˖ || inspo song : spotify version & yt version ᯓ★

ᝰ.ᐟ || katsuki bakugo x f!reader, she/her pronouns, pure fluff, acts of service, 1.0k word count •°. *࿐

To say Katsuki had a bad reputation was an understatement.

You suppose it wasn't a shocker that so many students found his ruff demeanor off-putting — his constant yelling and brash way of speaking — leaving many to form feelings of distaste towards the hot head.

So naturally, others began questioning how your relationship with him even lasted for so long, given he's still the same angry student attending UA, that somehow managed to grasp the heart of his bubbly classmate.

He never once batted an eye towards the pesky rumors about him, after all, he couldn't care less about what anyone else thinks.

All topics were on the table, except for one — you.

It was known ever since the first altercation, when he overheard your name from someone else's lips, conversation unknown, that no one else is allowed to speak of you in such ill manners.

Anyone could hate him but... you? The girl who doesn't have a single bad bone in her body? The girl saying a little "excuse me" or "thank you" even when not needed? Hate that girl? His girl? You?

Yeah not happening. Not on his watch. As if he'd let any lowlife spoil your name.

"HAH?! WHAT DID YOU SAY?! GET BACK HERE YA' EXTRAS!"

You groan at each one of his squirms, trying to hold him back to put some distance between the blonde and the very much frightened duo that he confronted out of nowhere.

I mean, one second he was by your side and the next... he was storming over in their direction!

"Katsuki, c'mon just let them go!"

He attempts to escape your grasp in hopes to chase them down — maneuvering around like a rabid animal — glaring absolute daggers at the two retreating males in the distance.

Who nearly piss their pants as they successfully escape sudden death.

"DAMN COWARDS—"

Seeing no way out of Katsuki beating them into a literal pulp, you wrap your arms around his waist, fighting off inner humiliation at how you probably looked like to everyone else, your smaller form clinging onto his for dear life.

Frankly not being too useful in this scenario... or so you thought.

He freezes in place.

And given your current position, face tightly pressed against his chest, you're unable to see the way his eyes slightly widened, how his brows raised upwards, the previous glare melted away in an instant.

The familiar touch sending shivers down his spine.

He halts his movements, secretly not wanting to accidentally hurt you, huffing and averting his gaze elsewhere.

"Tch, you can let go now dumbass…"

He tries to hide the creeping shyness in his demeanor, the involuntary blush that casts over his cheeks, fingers clenching into tiny fists at his side.

Slightly embarrassed that he reacted on instinct, he just couldn't help himself dammit!

You smile softly, reluctantly releasing him from your grasp, looking up to see his face, those pretty features now covered with a soft pink, hidden behind the infamous frown he always wears.

"You don't have to fight every person that talks bad about me 'suki, I really don't mind—"

He scoffs, cutting you off while taking your hand in his, ignoring all the stunned stares from passing students as he practically drags you to class.

"Yeah, well I fuckin' mind. Those damn bastards... how could they hate you just because yur' dating me? Fucking extras don't know what their talkin' 'bout…"

You sheepishly mumble apology after apology as he shoves past anyone in the way, listening to his frustrated rambles while he clears a path for you.

He glances at the onlookers with a grumpy glare, daring anyone to stand in his way. As if anyone would be stupid enough to mess with him but still...

Your eyes soften as he adjusts his grip, slender fingers slowly intertwining with your own, gently caressing the back of your hand with his thumb, a tenderness that's only available to you.

His gaze wavers.

"Does it really not bother you?"

You blink.

"Hm? What does?"

His grip on your hand grows less firm, more hesitant, ultimately vulnerable. Crimson eyes filled with uncertainty, rough voice losing its usual pitch, almost growing too quiet. Almost.

"...I don't exactly have the best reputation ya' know? People will continue judging us... judging you."

Your heart aches at the faint whisper, his subtle concerns immediately making you shake your head.

You knew about the judgement, knew about the whispers when you walked by the halls, knew about the backlash you'd no doubt receive.

But did you care? Of course not.

They didn't know him like you did, the true hero underneath all those glares and empty threats, the hero you hopelessly fell in love with.

You smile up at him, the two of you reaching the classroom in a matter of seconds, giving his hand a reassuring squeeze.

"I would choose you all over again if I could."

He studies your expression for a moment, gaze examining every pretty feature, trying to gouge any uncertainty behind those glossy orbs.

And once he finds absolutely nothing, his eyes snap away from yours, unsure of what to say, eventually clearing his throat as he reaches for the door handle.

The blonde didn't know why he got so tongue-tied every time you give him those eyes, full of love and devotion, so unapologetically open with your adoration while he's merely reduced to a flustered mess.

"You idiot..."

Unable to resist, he reluctantly gives your head a little pat, knowing you'd love nothing more then to receive some form of affection, a small exchange for your sentimental words, his own way of showing appreciation.

His own way of loving you.

You visibly brighten with newfound joy at his touch, smiling happily as you follow him inside, now with a little kick in your steps.

He didn't have to say anything else, you knew how he felt, especially when he continued to publicly defend you the next day... despite your continuous protests.

Because a few fights are nothing, after all, he'd win — every. damn. time. — anything for you, his choice in every lifetime.

✦ ⎯⎯⋆ ˚｡⋆ ୨ masterlist || taglist || intro || socials ୧⋆ ˚｡⋆⎯⎯ ✦

ᴀ/ɴ ||| hi my beautiful flowers! i'm sorry that i lowkey went MIA last week, i got massive writers block and went into hiding. but in that time i drew some mha fanart! and ofc i did bkg duhhhh, so stay tuned bc i might post it soon hehe... now time for me to go, plus ultra! ᕙ( •̀ ᗜ •́ )ᕗ ᴛᴀɢꜱ ||| @leleyro @zaiban2989 @qyuin @sunnyalmighty (❁ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)

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she-took-the-heartland · 2 months ago

Text

There are two very different but tangentially connected topics I've been thinking about: Covey lineage and homophobia in District 12.

We learn in TBoSaS that there are six remaining Covey members. There are three Baird cousins: Lucy Gray, Maude Ivory, and Barb Azure. There are two Clade brothers: Billy Taupe and Clerk Carmine. And there is the adopted Tam Amber.

Lenore Dove is confirmed to be a Baird whose mother died in chilbirth. When Haymitch finds the Covey graveyard, Lenore Dove's grave is next to Lucy Gray's and Maude Ivory's. This seems to imply Maude Ivory was Lenore Dove's mother.

"Clerk Carmine and her other uncle, Tam Amber, have raised her since her ma died in childbirth, seeing her pa's always been something of a mystery. They're not blood kin, her being a Baird, but the Covey look out for their own."

-SotR, pg. 8

From SotR pg 371 and 372

Since TBoSaS was released, it's been speculated that Katniss was descended from the Covey. So it isn't at all surprising to find that Burdock was also a Baird. Given that Lucy Gray is long missing/dead, and Maude Ivory is likely Lenore Dove's decesed mother, that leaves Barb Azure to be Burdock's mother.

"She [Lenore Dove] wasn't one of Burdock's Everdeen cousins, but I knew she had some distant ones on his ma's side."

-SotR, pg. 7

I remembered that in TBoSaS, Barb Azure is mentioned to have been dating another woman.

""She [Barb Azure] just started seeing a gal down the road," confided Lucy Gray when they were out of earshot of the house. "Probably glad to have the place to themselves for the day.""

-TBoSaS, pg. 430

This got me thinking more about homophobia in Panem, and I gathered as many references to queer relationships as I could find throughout the series.

In TBoSaS, we have the Barb Azure wlw reference which seemed to be socially acceptable in that time. Also in TBoSas, Coriolanus brings up a gay couple from the Capitol and does not express their relationship to be taboo:

"They had come to see Pluribus Bell, an aging man with lemon-tinted spectacles and a white powdered wig that fell to his waist. He and his partner, Cyrus, a musician, owned the shattered club and now made do by trafficking goods from its back alley."

-TBoSaS, pg. 32

It seems likely in the early history of the Panem, homophobia was not an issue in the Capitol or the Districts.

However, a few quotes from Katniss in Catching Fire and Haymitch in SotR lead me to believe at some point, homophobia was used to control District citizens specifically.

"That's when she revealed that he'd [Clerk Carmine] been together some thirty years with the fellow in town who replaces busted windows. They have to keep it quiet because loving differently can get you harassed by the Peacekeepers, fired from jobs, arrested even."

-SotR, pg. 13

By the 20th hunger games, 10 years after Barb Azure was seemingly openly dating a woman, Clerk Carmine had to keep his relationship with a man secret.

But there's no evidence that Capitol citizens are punished for same-gender relationships. It's hardly mentioned in the original trilogy, but it is implied that when Finnick was forced into prostitution with rich people from the Capitol, it wasn't just women who were paying for him.

"But ever since he [Finnick Odair] turned sixteen, he's spent his time at the Games being dogged by those desperately in love with him. No one retains his favor for long. He can go through four or five in his annual visit. Old or young, lovely or plain, rich or very rich, he'll keep them company and take their extravagant gifts..."

-Catching Fire, pg. 209

It's sad, but I think Suzanne Collins added these details to show that restricting the freedom to love who you want is another way of controlling the Districts. They are given freedom to choose who they want to marry... as long as that person is someone they can reproduce with to make more children for the hunger games.

Perhaps Barb Azure was bi, or more tragically, perhaps she was forced to assimilate, to marry an Everdeen man and have children. She always seemed to be the Covey member most tied to duty and responsibility.

#sunrise on the reaping #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #the hunger games #catching fire #sotr #tbosas #thg #maybe im saying some really obvious stuff in this post but it's late and im tired and i spent forever looking for these quotes #rip Azure Barb i love angst and despair so you will always be a lesbian. to me #sotr spoilers #my meta

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moonmaiden1996 · 3 months ago

Note

Part 5 🗣️🗣️🗣️

You want more???? Well, if you insist...

Love at First Sight (According to Nagumo, Anyway) Part Five

You barely had time to react. One moment, you were standing there, trying to process the horrifying revelation that Nagumo had somehow orchestrated your boss’s downfall, and the next—

Warm fingers wrapped around yours, pulling you along beside him. His hand was impossibly large and shockingly warm, an unexpected comfort that would’ve been reassuring if it weren’t attached to someone as strange and dangerous as him. An assassin, of all things.

Nagumo held your hand as if it was the most natural thing in the world, as if he had done it a thousand times before. And before you could jerk away, he was already walking, gently but relentlessly tugging you along. To anyone else, it would have looked like a couple on a casual evening stroll, perhaps heading to their favorite eatery or to the place of their first date.

“Come on, my love,” he purred, his voice rich with amusement. “We have a date to enjoy.”

“No, we don’t,” you snapped, digging your heels in, but even with all your body weight, he simply pulled you along, like you were nothing.

Nagumo didn’t even slow down.

“Oh, but we do,” he said, glancing back at you with that infuriating smirk still plastered on his face. “You agreed, remember?”

Your eye twitched. “I was tricked into agreeing.”

“Semantics.”

He didn’t let go, nor did he stop smiling.

You twisted your arm, trying to slip free, but Nagumo’s grip was like steel wrapped in silk—unyielding but deceptively soft. It wasn’t painful, not even close, but it was final. "Stop that, you’ll hurt yourself. And as much as I would like to play doctor, I’d much prefer to do so in another capacity.”

He wasn’t letting you go.

Your heart hammered in your chest.

“Let me go,” you tried again, voice low, warning.

Nagumo sighed dramatically. “Why must you resist happiness, my love? It’s just dinner.” He paused, then tilted his head. “Well, dinner and some light assassination talk, but mostly dinner.”

You stared at him, incredulous. “I knew you were crazy. I knew I should have given up caffeine. My mother was right—It is bad for my health.”

“And yet,” he said, smug as ever, “we are still here... must be fate.”

The worst part? You were still here.

And with every step, the escape route back to Sakamoto’s store was getting further and further away.

Nagumo led you down the quiet streets, weaving through the dimly lit alleys like he belonged there. He probably did.

Finally, he stopped in front of a small, hole-in-the-wall noodle shop, its faded red curtain swaying gently in the evening breeze. Warm light spilled out onto the street, and the rich scent of broth and spices curled in the air. Your stomach betrayed you with a loud growl.

Nagumo grinned. “See? Even your body agrees with me.”

You scowled, but your resistance was starting to waver. You could always run after dinner, right?

With a resigned sigh, you allowed him to pull you inside.

The shop was quiet, tucked away from the busy streets. The restaurant was small, empty, with no hope of calling for help from other patrons. The solitary chef behind the counter greeted Nagumo by name and gestured toward a booth at the back of the shop. The smell of freshly cooked broth hung in the air, making your stomach churn—not with fear, but hunger.

Nagumo guided you to a corner booth, finally releasing your hand as you slid into the seat across from him.

The moment you were free, you considered bolting.

Nagumo must have noticed, because he propped his chin on his palm, watching you with that lazy, amused smirk. “Sit tight, my love. I promise I didn’t kill anyone. Plus, the food is amazing. You like soba, right? They have ramen too, with hand-pulled noodles.”

You froze mid-movement. “Excuse me?”

Nagumo chuckled. “That’s what’s been bothering you, isn’t it? You think I killed him after he quit.” He leaned forward, eyes gleaming with mischief. “I didn’t. I simply… convinced him that leaving was in his best interest. Not that he wouldn’t deserve it, such a disgusting man. Should we get pudding too? Treat ourselves, it is a celebration of course.”

You stared at him, your pulse hammering in your ears. “How?”

Nagumo hummed, tapping his fingers against the table. “How, dessert? Or how did I give your old boss the old push?’’ he smiled across at you. ‘’Oh, you know. A little whisper here, a little well-timed accident there. Nothing too dramatic.” He smiled wickedly. “He got the message.”

The blood drained from your face.

Nagumo tilted his head, eyes sparkling. “You should be thanking me. I cleared the way for your promotion, didn’t I? He was awful to you. Lucky for him, I would’ve much rather put an ice pick through his eye socket, but Aoi frowned on that idea.”

You were going to be sick. "Aoi?"

"Sakamoto’s wife. She gave me lots of great advice. She's lovely, you should go out shopping with her sometime. We could even go on a double date.”

“You’re insane,” you whispered, barely able to comprehend it.

Nagumo grinned, delighted by your horror. “And you’re adorable when you’re horrified.”

You wanted to scream.

Your fingers clenched under the table, nails biting into your palm. Your pulse was erratic, your mind screamed at you to do something, anything, to get away.

That’s when you saw it.

The tattoo.

A swirl of ink peeked out from beneath the rolled-up sleeve of his shirt, intricate and sharp, curling along the skin of his wrist. You didn’t recognize the full design, but something about it screamed danger. People had tattoos these days, but the thick black lines, the sharp design—it screamed Yakuza more than it did a rebellious teenager trying to piss off their parents.

It was the final confirmation.

Nagumo wasn’t just some overconfident flirt with questionable morals. He was an assassin.

A real one.

Your breath came faster. Your mind raced. Your fingers inched toward the wooden chopsticks resting beside your bowl. Not a weapon, but sharp enough to give you enough time to escape.

Nagumo was still smirking, still watching you, completely unguarded.

This was your chance.

Your hand shot forward.

In an instant, Nagumo moved.

Before you could even register what had happened, your wrist was caught—flipped effortlessly, twisted just enough to disarm you. The chopsticks clattered uselessly against the table.

You barely had time to gasp before Nagumo’s other hand reached out, cupping your chin with unnerving gentleness.

His grin was gone.

For the first time, he actually looked serious.

And then—

He laughed.

“Oh, my love,” he breathed, eyes practically glowing. “You are perfect.”

You stared at him, stunned, your wrist still trapped in his hold.

Nagumo exhaled, shaking his head with something that disturbingly resembled fondness. “I knew you’d be perfect, but this?” He chuckled. “Trying to stab me in the middle of our date? How did I get so lucky? Beautiful.” He purred, pressing a soft kiss to your wrist.

Your entire body locked up.

He—

What—

“Let me go,” you forced out, but it came out weaker than you wanted.

Nagumo hummed thoughtfully, his fingers still wrapped around your wrist. Then, slowly, he released you.

But not before dragging his thumb lightly across your pulse point.

A deliberate, lazy touch.

Your skin burned where he had touched it.

“You really are something else,” he mused, sitting back like nothing had happened. “I knew you were the one for me.”

You yanked your hand back, your breath uneven. “You’re delusional.”

Nagumo just smiled, resting his chin in his palm. “No, I’m in love with the most perfect woman in the world... Now, let me order for you. I’ve always wanted to do that.” He beamed at you, his eyes scanning the menu with intense focus. “I promise you won’t regret it. I am, after all, the best husband. Let’s get some sake to share. They have a sparkling one you’ll love.” He giggled.

And despite everything, a small, twisted part of you—a sick part of you—thought he looked very handsome the way he smiled so determinedly at the menu, so happy.

What the hell were you going to do?

I rewrote this three times in the last two days.... I hope I got it right. I am not sure if I am going to do the next chapter focusing on the Reader or Nagumo or both so please stay tuned. Maybe some interaction with the other characters :P

Like. Comment. Request.

#nagumo x you #nagumo x reader #nagumo #nagumo sakamoto days #nagumo yoichi #sakamoto #sakamoto days #aoi sakamoto #sakamoto tarou

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aro-of-argentum · 3 months ago

Text

Suppression- 1

An eventual Pro!Kiribaku x Reader

WC: 5,064

Notes: The reader is in an established relationship with Kirishima, Bakugo is their roommate, Baku hasn't been sleeping and it's driving everyone up the wall, Reader has a way to help, fairly Bakugo-centric chapter. This one will probably not end up on a regular release schedule, and will instead come out as I have the inspiration to write it :)

Beta'd by: @teaspacebar

Next Chapter

Chapter 1:

Suppression- the conscious intentional exclusion from consciousness of a thought or feeling.

“Bakugo,” you called to the man currently burning a path into your rug with his pacing.

He hadn’t slept in days, you knew that. He’d been waking you and Eijirou up in the middle of the night with his quirk, set off by nightmares and stress. Everything was bothering him; everything was overstimulating him. He was jumpy and on edge, and his usual decompression strategies like going to the gym or out running until he was ready to pass out weren’t working, he still woke up screaming in the other room, if he fell asleep at all.

“Bakugo,” you tried again, and once again went unheard. It was like you weren’t even there. “You should sit down.”

“Can’t,” he clipped.

So, he had heard you. You sighed through your nose, a sadness sitting heavily in your chest. You’d been friends with the man for years, almost as long as you’d been dating Eijirou, and you’d never seen him like this. Grumpy? Sure. Irritable? Regularly. Angry even? On occasion, though it seemed he was way better about it now than he used to be given what your boyfriend had told you about their days in high school. But this was new. He looked like he was vibrating out of his skin, like he was constantly on the verge of a panic attack, so strung up that a single misplaced word might set him off. Still, you could see the fatigue in him. His shoulders were tense, steps heavy, eyes half-lidded and bloodshot until his attention was caught, and the squinted glare took them over.

His focus was pulled by the creak in the couch as you shifted, and he noticed the pained look on your face. He nearly snarled, “What?”

You pursed your lips. “You’ve been pacing for almost an hour, you’re going to put a hole in the floor.” He scoffed and kept walking the same line he’d been tracing the entire time. He had the room to do this in his bedroom, and he knew you were home, so clearly he didn’t want to be alone. “If you would just sit down,” you reasoned, “We could watch a movie or something-”

“Don’t!” It came out of him so fast you were sure it caught him as much off guard as it did you, but he just powered through it. “If you turn on that fucking tv, I’ll put my fist through the screen!” He was yelling and showed no sign of slowing down. “It’s too damn loud! The lights- it’s too fucking much-”

“Okay,” It was almost a whisper as you rose from the couch, understanding washing over you. There were times Eijirou got into this mood, though it looked different on him; he was easier to shake out of it, more willing to ask for help before it got this bad. A rough couple of days after a hard patrol or incident was one thing, but this had been going on, and getting worse every day, for over a week. The atmosphere in the house was at a metaphorical boiling point. You approached him slowly, arms raised so he knew you came in peace. “Bakugo, please,” you started, keeping your voice soft. “Just take a breath. Talk to me. Did something happen on patrol last week?”

His eyes snapped to yours wide and wild, like he was afraid you knew something you weren’t supposed to. “Nothing happened, I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about!” His volume had lowered slightly, but his posture remained cagey and defensive.

You shook your head, knowing better than to believe his words when his behavior and body language were telling you exactly the opposite. You didn’t push it though, choosing instead to go another route. You couldn’t stand to see him this way, you wanted to fix it, or at least help him to fix it himself. “If you don’t want to talk about it, we don’t have to,” you reassured, “but please let me help you with whatever this is.” You gestured over his general person.

“Yeah? How, dumbass?” The question was sneered at you, and you frowned, but tried not to let it get under your skin given the state he was in. At least he’d stopped the pacing to face you.

“You know how my quirk works?” you asked, though you knew he was well aware. He scoffed and you took it as an affirmation. “I can help. Maybe you could get some sleep, or-”

He bared his teeth like he was getting ready for a fight. “And what? Wake up and blow you apart before I know what’s happening?”

Your brow furrowed in irritation. “You couldn’t if you tried, and you know it.” His jaw locked, and you knew you had him. Suppression as your quirk was called, was a power that allowed you to take away, or ‘suppress’ other peoples’ senses, and if you could touch them, their quirks as well. You’d used it more than once to help Eijirou get through nightmares, his fear of cutting you up with his quirk appropriately quelled by the fact you could turn off his hardening all together. Tuning out all light and background noise was also helpful in getting him to fall asleep, and sometimes your boyfriend asked for that even on nights where everything was fine. You could do that for Bakugo too, but he’d have to want you to. Your quirk could be terrifying if it was used against a person’s will; you refused to do that to your friend.

He stood frozen in front of you, tense in every muscle in his body, teeth grinding so hard together you grew concerned he’d break them. You couldn’t help but think you must look like someone trying to coax a cornered animal into a trap.

“I can help you fall asleep and make sure that even if you do wake up, you won’t be able to hurt me. Okay?” You stepped closer to him, slowly, giving him plenty of time to dodge you if he so chose. The man in front of you wasn’t a touchy-feely person, in the literal physical sense, or in the less tangible emotional sense. His tendency to keep people at an arm’s length meant that it was a privilege when he’d let you in enough to get to know him all that time ago, and you did your best never to abuse it. Now though, you evoked that privilege to let him know that there were expectations on both sides of this interaction and the one you were proposing. There was a certain level of vulnerability he’d need to have for this to work, and you wanted to communicate outright that he could trust you to handle the situation- and him- with the care he so desperately needed right now. Your decision to use his first name was deliberate. “Katsuki, please, let me help you.”

His eyes went wide, and for the first time since you’d stood up, his gaze fell from yours, shoulders deflating slightly. “Okay,” came out, barely audible, but you heard it nonetheless.

You closed more of the distance between the two of you, careful not to move too suddenly, ever aware and respectful of the fact that while he had accepted your offer of help, it did not make him any less of a live wire. You reached for his left hand where it clenched into a white-knuckled fist at his side, closing your fingers around the back of his hand, gentle, but with enough pressure to not set off further sensory issues. “Do you want to test me?” you asked cautiously.

“No,” was his abrupt answer, given as though it should have been obvious. His ability to catch an attitude, even now, was amusing, but you kept that entirely to yourself.

“Okay.” You nodded in acceptance as you pulled slightly on the man’s wrist. “Come on.”

Bakugo’s movements were stilted and stiff as he followed you, the tension in his body doing nothing to help ease the uncertainty you could see all over his face as he sat next to you on the couch. You were still holding his wrist, a contact he knew you’d need to maintain in order to keep his quirk under control should the need arise. “So do I just,” he started uneasily, leaning over slightly as though to put his head on your shoulder before righting himself.

You let go of him, putting your hand out in a motion telling him to wait as you adjusted, feeling his eyes trained on you the entire time. You piled a couple of pillows against the arm of the couch before turning to sit fully facing him with your shoulder against the back cushions of the couch. “Do you trust me?”

He squinted at you incredulously, even as exhaustion began to take over now that he’d stopped moving around. “Yeah.” It was quiet, cautious, skeptical even, but you’d take it. You knew this part was going to be just as difficult, if not more so, than getting him to let you use your quirk on him.

You leaned back slightly against the pillows, uncrossing your legs to plant the outside one firmly on the ground whilst the other slid behind him to stretch down the couch lengthwise. From your new partially reclined position, you held your hands out to him. “Here.”

Unsurprisingly, he didn’t move. Bakugo’s form stayed stock still, watching you carefully as you flexed your fingers in attempt to encourage him. You knew that under any normal circumstances, asking Bakugo Katsuki to cuddle, let alone be the little spoon, would seem insane, but it would likely help him sleep to have his body weight on his chest and a heartbeat against his ear. And you were near certain you could get him to do it, because despite everything about the man that would tell you otherwise, you knew he craved such affection. You’d seen him, on more than one occasion, staring at the way Eijirou held you, hands twitching like he wanted to be there. But it was the times you noticed him watching you hold Eijirou that he looked truly lost; a longing covering his features as his eyes traced the movement of your fingers in your boyfriend’s hair, or the drag of your nails as you scratched the redhead’s back. And Bakugo would make an offhanded comment about PDA being gross, or how he ‘lives here too,’ completely unaware he’d been caught.

“It’s okay,” you reassured with a small nod. “No one in this house is going to judge you or be upset about it.” Which was true. Eijirou was firmly in the ‘friends should be able to cuddle’ category of the argument on physical affection. The only reason he didn’t is because the only person besides you he was close enough to want to curl up with was liable to obliterate the house if he tried. “It’s just me, Katsuki.” you tried to push all of the softness you could manage into your voice, knowing just how fragile this situation was, especially since Bakugo’s silence spoke volumes to his uncertainty. “You can lay down.”

He looked like a feral cat trying to decide whether to accept food from someone’s hand; all tension and skepticism, with something close to desperation in his eyes. His jaw flexed as he battled with himself for only another moment longer before the feral cat’s hunger won out. You watched as he adjusted uncomfortably, breaking eye contact to stare at the floor in front of him. “So, what, I’m supposed to just lay on top of you?” he questioned, and you could tell he was using every remaining drop of his energy trying to put his usual snark into the inquiry.

“Pretty much,” you answered with a shrug. “And put your head on my chest right here.” You tapped the spot just to the left of your sternum to show him where to go.

He looked to where your hand was before his gaze met yours again. When you gave him a half smile, laced with both pity and victory, he scoffed. “Knock that fucking look off your face, idiot, or I’ll do it for you.”

You knew you shouldn’t piss him off, shouldn’t rile him up when you were trying so hard to get him so sleep, but the shock of your conversation seemed to have pulled him away from the breaking point he’d been about to cross, and you wanted to at least acknowledge that. “Nah, Eijirou would beat your ass if I don’t kill you first. And besides, you’re an easy target when you’re sleep deprived.” Any retort he had died in his throat and his mouth snapped shut, scowl making him seem much more himself than the shellshock from only a few minutes ago. You chuckled a little, extending the invitation again, “Would you just come over here?”

“Yeah, fine.” As menacing as he tried to sound, his exhaustion won out, and he crawled over you, stopping when his knees were between yours and his hands were on either side of your ribcage. A moment of vulnerability flashed across Bakugo’s face, and he asked, “You’re sure this is okay?”

You nodded, giving a small smile when you answered, “Yeah, you need it. Lay down.” He followed your instruction, letting his weight drop slowly to your torso, arms draped awkwardly to your sides, and you immediately felt him start to relax. You felt his shoulders squirm though, like he wasn’t quite comfortable, or didn’t know where to put his hands. “You can put your arms around me,” you offered.

There was hesitation in his slowness as Bakugo carefully threaded his arms to wrap around your waist in a hug, even after you’d already draped your arms over his back. You waited until he’d been still for a moment to ask, “Comfortable?”

“Tch.” You could almost hear the scowl on his face, but it was quiet for a moment, and then, much softer, “…yes.”

You nodded to yourself. “I’m going to start with your quirk, you shouldn’t feel any different.” You closed your eyes for a moment, flattening your palm between his shoulder blades to shut off his quirk. The concentration was easy to hold once you’d found it, your job and your home life having given you quite a bit of practice with maintaining suppression for long periods of time. “Okay, now, even if you do wake up, nothing bad is going to happen.”

“I’m still stronger than you, dumbass.” There was no real heat behind the jab, you heard insecurity beneath it instead.

“You’re not going to hurt me,” you insisted.

The relenting mumble of, “Whatever,” was all you needed to know you could continue.

“Okay, the next part is where it bothers some people- not that I think it will bother you,” you added at the end of the sentiment, doing your best to make sure he knew you weren’t condescending him. He huffed, sounding like a disgruntled bull, but made no other interruption. “I’m going to take away your sense of sight and sound, so that you won’t be bothered by the lights in the house or any noise in here or outside, which should help you fall asleep, and ideally stay asleep.” The explanation was a bit redundant, given that you knew Eijirou had explained it to him before- though in a much more casual way- but you figured talking him through it again couldn’t hurt. “You’ll still be able to feel things though, so you’ll have an anchor, which is part of why you’re on my chest. Eiji says it helps when he can feel my heartbeat.”

“Yeah, it’s… nice, I guess.” Bakugo’s tone remained resistant, but he was always someone who communicated more through his body language than anything else, and the way that he had settled his entire weight onto you, practically melted into your hold, told you everything you needed to know.

“Are you ready?” you asked carefully.

“Sure.”

You gave the warning, “It’ll be less unnerving if you close your eyes first.” When he gave no response, you assumed that he’d followed your instruction, so you began to dull his senses. You stroked your free hand over his hair in a show of comfort, and while he didn’t say anything, Bakugo pushed his head into your hand slightly. He let out the faintest hum of approval, and simply due to the muscle memory of having Eijirou in your lap like this, you ran your fingers gently through his hair instead of over it.

He whimpered.

The shock you felt, despite your immediate decision not to acknowledge the noise, was nothing compared to the embarrassment on Bakugo’s face when he shot up and his eyes locked with yours. In the same moment he moved, you dropped the hold you had over his senses and quirk, and you stared back at him, not saying anything as your hands hovered by his ribs, careful not to touch him in case he decided he didn’t want you to anymore.

He put on a mask of anger, which you saw through but took seriously, nonetheless. “You can’t tell anyone about this ever!” he near-shouted. “Or you’re dead!”

You nodded slightly, still yet to move. That wasn’t what you’d been expecting him to yell about. You expected he’d call it off or get after you about touching him in a way he didn’t like. “I know.”

“I mean it, shit head!”

“I know.” You were careful to keep your tone even, wanting to reassure him that everything was fine, that you weren’t going to expose something that he considered a weakness; you knew him better than that. “I’m not going to.”

“Yeah, you better not.” He seemed to be losing the wind in his sails, the empty venom in his tone dying almost as quickly as it had arrived. As the adrenaline of the moment faded, Bakugo faltered above you, arms shaking just slightly, just enough for his elbow to unlock. You caught him before he could fall, hands closing the space around his ribcage to help support his weight. He closed his eyes for a moment, a pained expression covering his features, and turned his face away when he started to ask, “Could you- with the- uh…”

Your eyebrows shot up at the man’s inability to string words together, not normally one to stutter, but you caught the redness covering his ear; he was embarrassed to ask whatever it was. “Do you still want to try this?” you asked, cautious to keep your tone neutral so there would be no misinterpretation to say you were making fun of him.

Bakugo’s only response was to nod slightly, so you helped him slowly lower his weight back onto you, only letting go of him long enough to adjust your grip, this time putting both of your hands flat on his back. Once his arms were around you again, the side of his head pressed to your chest, you asked, “Ready?” He tensed like something was wrong, so you lifted your hands, “Katsuki, if this makes you that uncomfortable-”

“No, just-” he growled through the word, frustration clear in his tone, though he made no move to get off you. If anything, he squeezed tighter around your waist for a moment. “Play with my hair,” he grumbled, then added, “please?” sounding no less irritated than before.

You huffed a laugh, more than a little surprised by the ask, but happy to oblige. “Sure.”

“Then yeah, I’m ready.”

There was a moment of quiet as you watched the man heave a breath, and when he released it, you returned one hand to its place on his back while the other wormed into the hair at the back of his head, slowly working your fingers up and over on his scalp. He hummed appreciatively at the feeling and tensed again, only to relax a moment later when you gave no reaction. “Eyes closed?”

“Uh huh.”

“Goodnight, Katsuki.”

Over the next couple of minutes, you slowly suppressed his sight so there would be no shining light on the other side of his eyelids, and his hearing so the noises of the outside world would slowly fade away. His quirk was gone immediately, though you knew that would make no difference to him, and you stayed playing with his hair the whole time to help him feel at ease and hopefully relax him enough to fall asleep. It took almost no time for his breathing to even out once the only things he could sense were you and the breeze coming through the window. Once he was out, you reached for your phone, content to read until he woke up or needed something.

It was when your boyfriend got home that you realized how long you’d been sitting still.

“Hey, guys, I’m home!” The door swung shut and a moment later, you heard Eijirou call your name.

“In here!” you shouted, though without much force. When he came into view over the back of the couch, all smiles, you put the phone down and beckoned him over, careful not to jostle the man still in your lap. “Hey, lover boy,” you greeted with a wink as he entered the room. “Look what I have.”

When he got closer, Eijirou was able to look over the couch and see his best friend, still entirely asleep and snoring lightly as your fingers carded lazily through the blonde’s hair. His eyes grew wide. “Oh shit! Is he asleep?” He whispered, surprise seeping into his tone as he tried to be mindful of the noise he was making.

You, however, made no attempt to lower your volume, knowing that at most Bakugo would feel the vibrations from your chest as you spoke, nothing more. “You’re fine, baby, I’ve had him under for,” you tapped your phone to double check the time, “six and a half hours.”

“Really? Wow, I bet he’s going to feel so much better!” Eijirou had a habit of marveling at you, and now was no different as he stared like he was in awe of your power. “Any issues?” he questioned as he sat down on the coffee table, careful not to bump you or the man you held.

“None,” you admitted. “I think he’s so exhausted even his brain gave up.”

Eijirou’s hand came up to scratch the back of his head for a moment as he thought. “I’m honestly a little surprised he agreed to this.” He gestured with a tilt of his chin to the situation you currently found yourself in.

“Me too,” you agreed with a nod. “But I promised no one would ever find out, which means you can’t tell anyone either, cool?”

He tossed his hands up in surrender. “Hey, anything to get him and this house back to normal.” He stood from the coffee table, pressing a lingering but chaste kiss to your lips, then a shorter one to your forehead before walking away from where you sat, likely to go change, you figured. He kept up the conversation though, now reassured that he wouldn’t wake the other man by being too loud. “So, how’s your day been?” he asked from your bedroom.

“It’s been nice!” you realized aloud as you considered your day for the first time. “I mean, this morning was a little rough, but ever since I got him to crash, I’ve just been here, reading on my phone, and honestly? I think I kinda needed a lazy day.”

“Well, that’s great, babe! I’m glad you got to relax for a while,” he called back.

“I know it was my night to make dinner though.” Your gut twisted with guilt, though you knew what you’d done instead was more important. “I could order takeout, if you want-”

“No, honey,” he cut you off so gently as he reappeared from the bedroom, now in sweats and a tank top, hair pulled out of his face in an enormous ponytail. He pressed another kiss to the top of your head as he walked by, already heading for the kitchen. “Don’t worry about it, I’ll cook.”

A pout covered your lips as you questioned, “Are you sure? How was work?”

He laughed, “Work was as easy of a day as I could ask for. Mostly uneventful patrol followed by a meeting with Fat, and then some paperwork right at the end. Pretty chill,” he admitted with a shrug. He nodded toward where you sat on the couch. “Hey, how do we stack up as cuddle buddies?”

There was a playful mischief in his smile that made you laugh, and you felt bad for the way the movement jostled Bakugo. “Well, he’s lighter than you,” you admitted, followed by a puffed, breathy ‘ha’ you exhaled as the blonde’s grip tightened around you almost to the point of pain for a moment as he adjusted, nuzzling into your chest before he settled again, your fingers in his hair all the while. “He squeezes harder though,” you half laughed the sentiment, until you noticed the look on your boyfriend’s face. “Eiji?”

His jaw flexed and for a moment you thought he was angry until you saw the subtle soft blink and deep breath you knew all too well; he wanted something and couldn’t have it right now. “The noise…”

A single eyebrow quirked up as you looked at him, giving a dramatic scandalized gasp, all teasing in your tone when you said, “And here I thought you’d be ready to kill anybody else for getting noises out of me.” You’d meant it playfully, knowing Eijirou was protective, knowing how he felt about the idea of another man touching you, knowing he’d absolutely step in if you were ever put in a situation that called for it.

You meant nothing by the insinuation those things didn’t apply to Bakugo, which is why it shocked you so much when he said, “Anybody else, sure. Bakugo though…” his tone went up as though in question and he shrugged with a tilt of his head.

Wait. What? “I’m sorry,” you interrupted, confusion taking over your voice and your features. “What does that mean?”

“What do you think it means?” He asked in return, rather than answering, then walked into the kitchen and out of your view.

You shook your head, mouth agape in amused disbelief at his antics. “We should talk about that at some point,” you called to him.

“Whatever you want, baby-cakes.”

You listened for a moment as your boyfriend moved around the kitchen, so entirely unbothered by the last few sentences of your exchange. You didn’t notice you’d stopped playing with Bakugo’s hair until you felt a push against your unmoving hand as he squirmed, still asleep, seeking the affection. You started up again, and he settled, humming contentedly before his snoring picked up again a moment later. You shook your head at him, too. One of the loudest, grumpiest guys in the world, and here he was, wordlessly begging for affection as he slept on your chest.

You sighed, picking your phone back up and continuing to read as the sounds and smells of a cooking meal wafted through the house. You could have blocked the smell from Bakugo, but you figured there were few better ways to wake up than to the smell of something delicious. When Eijirou shouted that dinner was almost done, you began to allow Bakugo’s hearing back, slowly letting the audible world back into his awareness. He stirred, and when he inhaled long and drawn out, you let his sight fade back in so that when he opened his eyes, they would be useful to him. You kept his quirk down though, just in case, with your hand still buried in his hair.

“Bakugo,” you called softly, knowing he was waking up, and trying to pull him gently the rest of the way. “Dinner’s almost done, it’s time to eat.”

He groaned, but started to sit up, rubbing his eyes as he went, and you let your hand settle on his leg as you sat up too, just in case he needed you, but he was calm, so after a moment, you pulled it away.

“Hey,” you greeted him with a soft smile when he looked at you, eyes still half-lidded with sleep. “How do you feel.”

“Good,” he nodded through the sentiment. “Better. Tired, though.”

You chuckled slightly. “Makes sense, it’s the first uninterrupted sleep you’ve had in over a week.”

He hummed in acknowledgement, voice still all gravel.

“Eiji’s almost done with dinner, did you want to try and eat something?”

“Probably should,” he reasoned. And you nodded in agreement.

It only took a few minutes of the three of you talking together over dinner for Bakugo to get back to himself. He was tired still, sure, but far from the overstimulated, exhausted, trainwreck he’d been earlier. He and Eijirou barked at each other all through the meal, and if he occasionally threw a stray jab or insult in your direction, you were quick to return it.

After dinner was eaten and dishes were cleaned, the three of you agreed to call it an early evening- though not too early an evening by Bakugo’s standards- and went your separate ways. It was just as you were about to follow Eijirou into your bedroom, that the other man caught your wrist.

“Hey, dumbass,” he started, and waited for you to turn to face him before he continued. “Thanks, or whatever. For earlier.”

A tired, but genuine smile covered your face, and you nodded slightly. “Anytime, okay? I mean that.”

“Sure. Thanks.” He said it as though he was unsure whether to believe you, but you knew tonight was not the time to try to fight that battle.

“Goodnight, Bakugo.”

“Night,” he almost whispered when you’d turned away, wrist slipping from his grasp to join your boyfriend in your bedroom.

Even with all your observational skill, you failed to notice the way his hand stayed outstretched toward you for a few seconds too long, or the way his eyes followed your every movement until you were out of view. You missed the shame that covered his face for a moment before he turned to enter his own bedroom. Eijirou didn’t.

#bakugou x reader #kirishima x reader #kiribaku x reader #bakugou katsuki #kirishima eijirou

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