#it took me 8 hours to p rank act I

[terminalkisser]

p ranking act II is gonna kill meeeeee. but Sispyhus☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️

[emy-loves-you]

Sanders Sides AU-gust Day 9: Royalty

Virgil is the apprentice of a local baker. He wishes to become a knight in order to repay a debt he believes that he owes King Thomas. His best friend (and crush) Patton tries to dissuade him. Because Patton doesn't want Virgil to know his secret.

Moxiety, Intrulogical, Roceit, Creativitwins and familial T+J+L+P

In case anyone is curious about the ages: -Virgil and Patton = 16 -Logan and Janus (twins) = 25 -Roman and Remus (twins) = 26 -Thomas = 33

Day 8 | Masterlist | Day 10

“Hello, Vee!”

Virgil looked up at the teenager skipping throughout the bakery. It was early in the morning, hours before sunrise, so the place was empty beyond the two of them. Virgil smiled softly. “Good morning, Pat.” He went back to reading his current book.

Pat read the title. “Swordsmanship for simpletons.” He frowned. “You’re still applying to be a royal knight?”

Vee sighed, closing the book. “Yes, I’m going to become a knight. We’ve already talked about this. I owe the King my life. Becoming a knight is the least I could do to repay my debt.”

Pat sighed. “You know, King Thomas probably doesn’t remember meeting you all those years ago.”

Virgil set the book on a nearby table. “I know, Pat. But it’s the principle of the matter.” There were a few moments of tense silence. “I’m turning 16 in 3 weeks.”

“I know.”

“I’m going to become a knight.”

“I know.”

“Then why do you try and convince me otherwise?”

Pat sighed, taking Virgil’s hand in his. “Vee, you mean the world to me. Believe me when I say the castle isn’t as glamorous as people make it out to be. There are so many wonderful and amazing things that you can do without risking your life on a daily basis.”

Virgil frowned. “I know, but I have to. I need to prove that I deserve my second chance. If not to the King, then to myself.”

Pat sighed. “Alright.” He smiled. “Why don’t we talk about something happier. Like that cute boy that works at the flower shop!”

Virgil snorted. “Cute? That kid’s a disaster waiting to happen. According to the rumor mill, he almost lost his privates to a Venus flytrap.”

The two friends giggled, happy to just be with each other for a short while. But like all good times, this one had to end. Just as the sun began to rise over the horizon, Pat made his leave, promising to visit again the next day.

------------------------------------------------------

Patton sighed as he made his way home. The sun was just starting to rise, so he only had a few minutes before someone noticed his absence. He quickly made his way throughout the town, keeping his hood up to avoid recognition.

When he finally made his way to the castle, Patton made a beeline for the shortest tower. Once he was at its base, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a small flute. He played a familiar tune and watched as a rope was thrown out of the window. Patton quickly grabbed the rope and began to climb up the tower. It was an easy climb, mainly because of years of experience. At the top of the rope was Janus, Patton’s mentor and one of Patton’s older brothers.

Janus sighed as Patton entered the tower “You’re late, Patton.”

Patton smiled. “Oh, you would not believe it, Janus. I had the most amazing time!”

Janus smirked. “You always say that, and yet every time you go outside you visit the same place and talk to the same person.”

Patton blushed. “W-well, it’s still a wonderful visit every time!” He ignored the way Janus’ mouth quirked in silent laughter. “And don’t think I don’t see the wrinkled collar and tussled hair! You left to visit Roman to moment I was gone, didn’t you?”

Janus quickly cleared his throat. “Hurry on, breakfast is in a few minutes and we need to look presentable.”

The two quickly made their separate ways to their bedrooms, getting ready for the morning. Once Patton looked less like he’d been outside and more like he’d just woken up, he quickly made his way to breakfast. He made sure to check on Janus and Logan, just to make sure they were on their way to breakfast. Both rooms were empty, but Patton stopped to stare for a moment. Even though the two scholars (and fraternal twins) had identical rooms in terms of layout, their styles were completely different. Logan preferred a clean room with little personality, while Janus preferred a more elegant touch. It was always fun to check in on the two in the mornings. Mainly because their rooms tended to contrast in quite an amusing way, but also because Patton could usually tell if their boyfriends spent the night with them. Janus and Logan always kept their rooms meticulously clean, so little changes made big differences. Janus’ room looked normal, but Logan’s desk was more disorganized than usual. Remus probably pulled Logan to bed before he could clean up for the night.

Patton giggled to himself as he made his way to the breakfast table. Everyone thought that Patton was innocent and naive, but he actually knew a lot more than they did about themselves and the castle around them. Actually, the only person who didn’t think that Patton was just a clueless child was Virgil. Even though Virgil didn’t know anything about Patton, he always treated Patton like he was a mature adult. It helped that Virgil was the only person that Patton let himself act naturally around. That’s the main reason why Patton didn’t want Virgil to become a knight: the second Virgil started working at the palace, he’d learn who Patton is and would start treating him like a child.

Patton shook his head, dispelling those nasty thoughts. Virgil probably wouldn’t be accepted into the ranks, so Patton’s secret should be safe. Right now, Patton didn’t need to think about that. He wasn’t Pat right now. He was Patton.

Patton approached the doors to the dining room and watched as the guards bowed before opening the door. He gave them a quick nod before stepping into the room. He was the last one to show up, apparently. Logan and Janus sat on the left, while Captains Roman and Remus sat on the right. There was a space between Logan and the head of the table that was empty, and Patton sat there. At the head of the table sat Patton’s eldest brother. He gave Patton a soft smile. “Patton, how nice of you to join us.”

Patton blushed. “Sorry, Thomas. I didn’t get a lot of sleep last night.” Patton saw Janus’ fingers twitch in the corner of his vision. Lies. Janus was the only one who knew about Patton’s escapades.

Thomas frowned. “I’ll have the head herbalist find something to give you for insomnia. We can delay your morning studies if you need some more sleep.”

Patton shook his head. “I’ll be fine, I promise.”

Prince Patton, fourth in line for the throne, took a bite of his pastry and wished it was one of Virgil’s pastries. Maybe he could hire the baker Virgil worked for. Would that convince Virgil to not become a knight?

Patton took a sip of his juice to hide his frown. It probably wouldn’t work, but anything was worth a try at this point.

[chpkns]

BEST ALBUMS 2020

Some albums I enjoyed during quarantine.

Hon Mentions: Campfire Chords - Arkells, A Written Testimony - Jay Electronica, All In One - Jaunt, Punisher - Phoebe Bridgers, Alfredo - Freddie Gibs and Madlib, Thats What They All Say - Jack Harlow, Western Swing & Waltzes and Other Punchy Songs - Colter Wall, This Place Sucks Ass - PUP, Only For Dolphins - Action Bronson, Black Habits - D Smoke, What’s Your Pleasure - Jessie Ware, 3.15.20 - Childish Gambino, Dedicated Side B - Carly Rae Jepsen, Dark Lane Demo Tapes - Drake, After Hours - The Weeknd, color theory - Soccer Mommy, Circles - Mac Miller, Womb - Purity Ring

10) Future Nostalgia - Dua Lipa

One of the lesser, although still significant, tragedies of the 2020 COVID era was that weddings and sweaty club basements the world over were robbed of Dua Lipa’s prolific output this year. Future Nostalgia is hit or miss in places, but the hits come hot and heavy delivering banger after 80′s-disco-inspired banger. Dominant summer jams “Don’t Start Now” and “Break My Heart” are the highlights here, along with “Levitating” (equally good with or without DaBaby). Sleeper tracks “Cool” and “Hallucinate” round out the year’s best pure pop album.

Highlights: Don’t Start Now, Break My Heart, Levitating, Physical, Cool, Hallucinate

9) Women In Music, Pt. III - HAIM

The third album from LA’s sister act rock trio HAIM delivers consistency and growth for the band. There’s plenty of retro heartbreak rock on Women In Music, Pt. III to satisfy fans of HAIM’s first two albums, but lots of new on offer as well including the jazzy Lou Reed inspired sax of “Summer Girl” and Danielle Haim sounding positively Joni Mitchell-esque on “Man From the Magazine”. The auditory production flourishes of erstwhile Vampire Weekend member Rostam are noticeable throughout and help stretch the bounds of the HAIM sisters’ signature Wilson Phillips meets Fleetwood Mac summer rock sound into something more of the moment.

Highlights: The Steps, Summer Girl, Don’t Wanna, Man From the Magazine, FUBT

8) My Turn (Deluxe) - Lil Baby

I’ve almost given up on trying to enjoy or understand most “new rap” but every now and then something breaks through that I connect with for some reason. Atlanta rapper Lil Baby’s My Turn was that album for me this year. There are many reasons I feel I should not like Lil Baby’s music, from his liberal use of autotune to his mumbling delivery, but something always drew me back to it and, listen after listen, it grew on me. Lil Baby’s flow is persistent when he locks in, with matching driving trap production from Quay Global, Tay Keith and others, mirroring in sound the story of Baby’s rise from the streets to prison to the studio. The standout track is late addition “The Bigger Picture”, Lil Baby’s protest anthem on race in America, policing and the turmoil following the killing of George Floyd by police, a political statement from an otherwise apolitical artist, showing that Lil Baby has much more to offer than bravado and autotune.

Highlights: Grace (ft. 42 Dugg), Forever (ft. Lil Wayne), No Sucker (ft. Moneybagg Yo), Social Distancing, The Bigger Picture

7) Miss Anthropocene - Grimes

The third major studio release from Montreal native Claire Boucher, better known as Grimes, doesn’t reach the same highs as its predecessors - 2015′s electro-pop masterpiece Art Angels (which rated number 1 on this list for that year) or 2012′s Visions, the synth-laden fever dream that introduced Grimes to mainstream notoriety (number 2 on this list for 2012) - but it’s still very much worth the time. The vibe of Miss A falls somewhere between Grimes’ previous two albums, and a little darker and messier to boot. Grimes sounds a bit like she’s playing a concert for the end of the world, which feels a bit prophetic for an album released just before a global pandemic took hold. As always, Grimes is out to flex her muscle as a technician and across the album’s ten tracks she mixes diverse sounds ranging from rave synths to banjos showing how far her craft has come since making Visions on Garageband in her Mile End apartment.

Highlights: So Heavy I Fell Through The Earth, Violence, Delete Forever, 4ÆM, You’ll miss me when I’m not around

6) evermore - Taylor Swift

Spoiler alert, this isn’t the highest ranked Taylor Swift album on this list. Surprise released in December, evermore was an early Christmas present to fans of Swift’s surprise summer album folklore (more on that later). evermore continues Swift’s reinvention from pop star to indie singer-songwriter, assisted by songwriting partner Aaron Dessner of The National and a variety of indie darling guest stars - this time around featuring HAIM, The National’s Matt Berninger and another stunning guest turn with Bon Iver. Speaking of Justin Vernon, the album capping title track might be the single best song on either folklore or evermore. And for fans of Taylor’s earlier catalogue like me, the return to country music on “no body, no crime” is like reconnecting with an old friend. evermore is a little messier and less consistent thematically than its sister album, feeling a bit like folklore’s b-sides. But when your b-sides are better than most artist’s a-sides, why not release another album’s worth?

Highlights: ‘tis the damn season, no body no crime (ft. HAIM), coney island (ft. The National), cowboy like me, evermore (ft. Bon Iver)

5) RTJ4 - Run The Jewels

Walking the streets of my neighbourhood with the first listen of RTJ4 in my earbuds, I found myself actually crying at the thought that I would not get to see Killer Mike and el-P perform these songs live in the summer of 2020. The memories of RTJ festival sets past came rushing over me in a wave. That was my first “damn, I miss live music moment” of the pandemic. The fourth instalment of Run The Jewels’ historic rap partnership is more of the same in the very best way. Like the dynamic duo’s previous three instalments, RTJ4 is in your face, moves at a frenetic clip, and takes no prisoners. There’s even another album highlighting collaboration with Rage Against The Machine’s Zack De La Rocha. The politics of RTJ4′s tirades against inequity and the police state feel even more imminent in 2020 against the backdrop of George Floyd, the ensuing protest movement that gripped America, and the 2020 presidential election. I really hope we get a chance to see Mike and el-P tour these songs in 2021, the world needs it.

Highlights: ooh la la (ft. Greg Nice and DJ Premier), goonies vs. E.T., walking in the snow, JU$T (ft. Pharrell Williams and Zack de la Rocha), a few words for the firing squad (radiation)

4) Saint Cloud - Waxahatchee

The majestically twangy folk-Americana of Saint Cloud, the fifth solo album from Katie Crutchfield (stage named Waxahatchee after Waxahatchee Creek, Alabama, where the singer grew up), is a nostalgic cure for the ails of 2020. The soft bluesy rhythms of Crutchfield’s songs feel like a lazy long summer day spent by the water. That was something we needed this year. The songwriting is just as beautiful. The standout track, “Fire”, speaks to Crutchfield’s journey finding sobriety and reconnecting with her southern roots. It also speaks to a longing feeling “give me something / it ain’t enough / it ain’t enough”.  On “Arkadelphia”, Crutchfield croons: “We try to give it all meaning / Glorify the grain of the wood / Tell ourselves what's beautiful and good”. In the chaos of 2020, the calm oasis of Saint Cloud is certainly something beautiful and good worth enjoying.

Highlights: Can’t Do Much, Fire, The Eye, Arkadelphia, St. Cloud

3) Suddenly - Caribou

Suddenly was my first genuine pandemic listen and, in the early days of lockdown, I found myself going back to it again and again. So much so, that the opening haunting notes of “Sister” became a kind of touchstone as I adjusted to a weird new work-from-home lifestyle. The chilled out weirdness of Caribou was an extremely welcome presence in 2020. It had been long enough since 2014′s Our Love (2014′s number 1 on this list) that I’d forgotten how enjoyably quirky Dan Snaith’s floaty pseudo-house tunes could be. Suddenly is a little more laid back than the club ready Our Love, which maybe suits it more to a world where dancefloors are closed. The tunes are also tighter, more economical in their length and soundscape. The lead single “Home” sounds downright commercial (in a good way) with it’s motown sampled chorus. Other parts of the album, like the closing “Cloud Song” venture into more experimental territories. All throughout, however, are Caribou’s signature warm chord progressions inviting you to lose yourself in them. Whether you’re looking for a guided meditation or an at-home dance party, Suddenly was the perfect 2020 album for it.

Highlights: Sister, Home, Lime, Never Come Back, Ravi

2) Cuttin’ Grass, Vol. 1 : The Butcher Shoppe Sessions - Sturgill Simpson

2020 was full of unexpected things, many bad but some surprisingly delightful. Firmly in the latter category is Cuttin’ Grass, Sturgill Simpson’s surprise double album made up entirely of bluegrass covers of his own catalogue. A true product of 2020, Simpson recorded the album with a murderer’s row of contemporary bluegrass artists after recovering from COVID-19 and challenging his fans to raise funds for charity in exchange for recording a new album. That album became Cuttin’ Grass, a traditional bluegrass re-imagination of the greatest hits and hidden gems of a country artist who has always strived to avoid being labelled as a country artist. The songs feel effortlessly at home and are given new life amid the frenetic guitar and mandolin picking, flying fiddles, and twangling banjos. If Simpson’s ode to the revelatory experience of psychedlic drug use “Turtles All The Way Down” felt revolutionary on 2014′s Metamodern Sounds in Country Music, it feels like an old standard here with its tempo pitched up and enveloped in the cacophony of the bluegrass ensemble. There is some good old fashioned heartbreak to slow things down too. Mandolin player and backup vocalist Sierra Hull shines on “I Wonder” (a cover of a song originally recorded by Sturgill’s former band Sunday Valley) as she joins Simpson on the chorus: “Tell me am I the only one / drinking and cursing your name?” The juxtaposition of Simpson’s unconventional country catalogue with the most traditional of country music styles just works and the entire hour can be listened and relistened for days. And if you’re still not satisfied, the companion “Volume 2: the Cowboy Arms Sessions” released in December brings back the same supporting cast to explore more of Simpson’s catalogue.

 Highlights: All The Pretty Colors, Breakers Roar, Time After All, Turtles All The Way Down, Voices

1) folklore - Taylor Swift

Well, I told you there’d be more Taylor Swift on this list, and here it is. Your number 1 album of 2020 is folklore, the surprise release pandemic project in which the world’s biggest country star turned pop star reinvented herself again as an indie artist. Unlike anything else Swift has put out since RED, nothing on folklore is designed to be played in a stadium. Rather, it’s all more at home in a cabin by the fire, or in your earbuds on a fall walk... basically, it’s music meant for 2020. Like its companion evermore, folklore is the product of Swift’s songwriting collaboration with The National’s guitarist Aaron Dessner. The melding of songwriting styles seems like an odd match at first but sounds like a match made in heaven. Lyrically, Swift’s songwriting makes an evolutionary leap, almost leaving her primary auto or semi-autobiographical comfort zone behind completely (other than, perhaps, in heavily veiled metaphor) in favour of invented stories and semi-historical world building. After a few listens, you discover that the same characters appear in different songs like the imagined history of Rebekah Harkness, the real life former inhabitant of Swift’s Rhode Island home, on “the last great american dynasty” or imagery of “battleships” that “sink beneath the waves” in the ghost story of “my tears ricochet”. In the so-called “teenage love triangle trilogy” of “betty”, “cardigan”, and “august”, Swift tells different parts of the same story from the perspective of different characters. Each song stands on its own, but the discovery that the pieces fit together is wonderful. “betty” is the standout track for me, as a long suffering fan of “country Taylor”. In style, it harkens back to her earlier work, but in substance it’s something new entirely as Swift sings from the perspective of James, the boy who has done wrong by his lover and is seeking forgiveness. The pinnacle of the album is “exile” Swift’s collaboration with Bon Iver’s Justin Vernon. The call and response interaction of Swift with Vernon’s true to for emma form baritone is chill inducing. Like so many of the unexpected good things in 2020, folklore came from throwing plans out the window and doing what felt right for the moment. This is Taylor Swift making the music she wanted to make. In Dark Knight fashion, it’s the album we needed, if not the one we deserved. It’s the best album of the year.

Highlights: cardigan, the last great american dynasty, exile (ft. Bon Iver), my tears ricochet, epiphany, betty, peace

[yannsscarf]

A personal selection:

every favorite shot from every episode of Skam France season 3.

episode 1: the moment when lucas made up his mind and took the first step.

to me, its a hard one between the moment when eliott walked in le foyer and that facial expression lucas made. it's like a hit to the head and something was growing inside from that moment. but again to me the story of lucas begins here. he chose his fate, his instinct. he hesitated, swallowed, yet he still walked forward. i just love this moment so much.

episode 2:  the moment when lucas becoming the Polaris of eliott.

specifically this shot. lucas looked back and its almost like he was searching for acceptance. its so telling with his careful, longing, slightly doubted face. he cut himself open and presented his heart to his crush, it's so bold of a move but it's so beautiful, heartbreakingly beautiful. and you can see eliott’s eyes, they are lightening up like there’s nothing brighter than lucas.

episode 3: the moment when they challenged each other.

where do I begin? or do I even need to? lucas’ eyes are telling everything. if there’s any moment that they are confirming things between them, this is the moment. lucas is challenging, eliott is challenging, they dare each other to take the first move. the tension, the desire, the nameless butterflies flying around in the air. name one stronger eye contact in tv history I’ll wait.

episode 4: ‘i’ve watched your project.’ ‘guess we have to marry now.’

this particular shot is hands down my fav in this season. just how it resembles the dream of eliott, how it shows that lucas is definitely the polaris to eliott, how brave and beautiful it is for lucas to take a lead and show his pure admiration and love to eliott. at this moment they stopped questioning, they stopped guessing and teasing, they found each other. I might be the weirdest person but to me, locking fingers is waaaaay more poetic, sensual and significant than other physical contacts. and this moment completed me.

episode 5: the ending shot.

how do you say, disappointed, hurt, brokenhearted, numbed and despaired? this ending shot tells you how. I don't know where to begin or how to begin to describe the feeling that I had after this scene. or how much it is enough for me to appreciate the cinematography in here. every time I watch it I'm always amazed by that certain amount of blurriness in the ending shot, as if its seen through the eyes of lucas, blurred out from time to time, losing focus every now and then, crushed by rage, despondency, and hopelessness.

episode 6: utter vulnerability, emotionally raw, and friends become family.

I love how lucas is being the one who comforts people in the beginning and tried so hard to get himself together, yet failed in the end. the whole blue in this shot, tone-wise and emotion-wise, is thoroughly conveyed. somehow in the mood of sadness and sorrow, we felt the warmth. in the moment of taciturnity, sadness was flowing under, and the tears were their way out.

episode 7: a fascinating dance in the rain of oil paint.

I probably rewatched this episode 200 times before i made my decision. what can say besides the fact that this clip is not only a tribute but a poem of its own. the way they swing, how they hold onto each other, the holy intimacy, and colors are everywhere as if we just walked into someone’s dream. the shot is so perfectly done it almost feels sacred to me, and nothing there should be violated. hold your breath, stop whatever you are doing, drop your phone, take a seat, and enjoy one the most beautiful shots in tv history.

episode 8: lucas’ ability to love people.

episode 8 is probably the hardest one. too much has happened and too many need to be remembered. i actually made a final 5 and then ditched them all, come up with this one. funny thing is that no matter how many times i watch this clip, especially this scene, i can't tell if its an improvisation or its actually in the script. but either way, they have given a whole new layer of lucas’ character, his ability to love. he stares at eliott until he has gone from sight, he blows a kiss to him even no one is there to catch. this moment is when i go, this boy is far gone in love, its so silly so pure so heartwarming yet so full of strength. he has the world’s strongest empathy even tho he’s gained less during his childhood. this level of devotion and loyalty made lucas the most loveable, angelic and relatable. (btw the tip of his nose bounces when he blows kisses I’ve watched it for two hours no regret.)

episode 9: remember stopped and lucas whispered, ‘T’es plus tout seul.’

kudos to the editing team because how many of us had goosebumps when remember was put on hold, as if the whole world has stopped and all you can hear is lucas’ mad heartbeat, following the line, ‘you are not alone anymore.’ its so simple, so heartwrenching, yet so powerful. they way lucas put himself in a lower position, forehead against eliott, hands cupping eliott’s face, you don't need to hear it to know how much he loves him. its written on his face.

episode 10: the tears of Juedi 17h32.

lucas has cried many times during this season. too many times to the point some pious, mindless people started to complain about it. I’ve said it before but I gotta say it again, be grateful, be devoted, it really is a privilege for us to sit there and witness them all. his emotions through his tears in this season are priceless. and how amazing the whole crew is because they aren't afraid to show it to the audiences. society tells men that its a shame to cry, and most of them act along. lucas said, fuck it, I’ll cry whenever I feel it. and isn't it just the most beautiful, important thing in the world? to me, episode 10 has blessed us some of the most accurate, sincere, on-point reactions. eliott’s honest monologue about his mental health, lucas’ overprotective status and his strong empathy showed up everywhere in those little details. but nothing hits me harder than this shot. the bus drifted, then the camera started pulling away but remained closeup, lucas’ emotions was poured out, everyone is feeling it through the screen. his tears are shed for sadness from parting, happiness from love and tenderness from eliott. his tears are the proof of living the moment, that lucas is living in the moment and feeling everything. and it has to be in our recognition that no one should be reserved from showing basic human emotions. 

I specifically took some of those out and highlighted some frames just to show that I really really love them. it’s not ranked, its nearly impossible to rank them. I already had a hard time choosing between scenes. again it’s only my personal taste and some might not seem to be important at all to others. but they are truly my favourite, cinematography wise, symbolism-wise, just anything.

I can’t even say its a tribute or anything to season 3 because it’s just my simple modification of the original work. I only picked them just so I can show my genuine appreciation to the whole crew. they are the real MVP. they have to know that I for one appreciate every second of the season and every piece of transmedia content. I laughed, I cried, I got upset, I became furious, I smiled, I rolled my eyes, I looked into the void, I sighed, but most importantly, I learned.

lucas lallemant, being the little hero he is, really had me fall hard. i don’t even know how to use my pale, plain, tasteless words to describe how much i love him. i love him knowing that i could never reach his level of bravery, and it doesn’t matter. i have thousands of words for him yet somehow I can’t say anything.

I guess if parallel universe does exist, maybe I’ll meet him, hold his hands, might even say thank you even if it sounds strange as hell. but I do thank him.

thank you lucas, for you being you, for always choose love. Thank you for never quitting, for never stop fighting. Sometimes I take a look at you and I tell myself, somewhere in this universe you exist, and that’s such a bliss. I don’t know what did I do to deserve you, such a gentle soul, such a golden heart. Thank you for just, your whole existence. I take a look back of the teenager me and seeing the things that I’ve missed, people who I’ve been wronged. And there’s you, lucas, there’s you. You did things that i never had the guts to do, you choose the one that I’ve lost a long time ago. And I’m so happy that you did because you deserve all the love.

You are my little hero and always will. It’s been such a short amount of time, if only I knew parting was this hard, I would give up anything just to live through these all over again, just so I can meet you one more time, just so I can see your beautiful goofy smile, hold your hands, and give you the biggest hug in the whole world, and say a proper goodbye instead of being a mess and totally out of breath because of all the tears.

I’m gonna miss you so much.

Goodbye Lucas, I love you so, so much, I really do.

Until next time.

[bluegrassbubblessoapandsund-blog]

I’m a LOUSY Blogger!

But Let’s Get To Improving That!

Well, obviously, I forgot for a while that I even had a Blog!  Shame on Me!  That being said, let’s start by Re-Introducing who I am, what I do and what we’re all doing here in the first place!

I am Melisa.  I’m 51 years of age and I have been married to my high school sweetie since 1988 and his name is David.  We’ve been together for 33 years in 2020.  David and I share three beautiful grown daughters, Brittany, Kymberly and Krystina.  We have six grandchildren:  Jessica is 11, Rebecca is 10, Katherine is 7, Joshua is 7, Annalyna is almost 3 and our newest is Zanora, born October 18th of this year.  We also have four “Fur-Babies”.  A Chihuahua/Pomeranian mix named Peanut (She’s almost 9 years old), a Papillon named Popcorn (She’s almost 5 I think!), her full blooded sister Caramel (If Popcorn is 5, Caramel is 4!) and our most recent addition is Bella (she’s about 5 too, I think)  Bella was my Mom’s baby.  My Mom passed away a few months after she got Bella.  At the time of my Mom’s passing, we didn’t want to give Bella away, and Krystina adopted her and loves her to death.  However, with the recent new addition of Zanora to the household and Annalyna being a normal 2 year old, Bella inevitably “nipped” at Annalyna.  So, we took Bella….for now.  Who knows, she might go back to Krystina’s house, only time will tell.

What do I do?  Well, I’m actually a trained Medical Assistant and Phlebotomist.  I worked for a handful of doctor’s in my native state of California after graduating from school.  One of my favorites was working at an Urgent Care facility where I got to see all kinds of illness and injury.  But the job I enjoyed the most, was working for the Chief FAA Medical Examiner of Los Angeles County.  I was in charge of the lab, ran all kinds of tests, took X-Rays as well as a myriad of other things.  I loved the patient interaction and helping people get and maintain the ability to fly, through their Federally Mandated Physicals.  However, David works in the Aircraft Industry, which at times, can have a high turn over rate, so you go where the jobs are (The main reason we’ve lived in 6 states throughout our marriage!) and we ended up moving to the state of Arizona from our home state of California.  After graduating school and working in my field in those offices, I eventually found work with the local school district my daughter attended as a substitute Health Office Technician.  After a couple more moves, and a couple health issues on my part, as well as the death of my Dad from throat cancer, we moved back to California to be closer to my Mom and Sister, Annette. Because of my love of cooking, during this time in California, I also attended Culinary Arts School.  However, my husband David was working in the aircraft industry and after 9/11 happened, unfortunately the jobs in that industry dried up and he had to find “side hustles” to make ends meet as he looked for other employment within the industry.  Then one day, one of the job applications he put in, panned out!  The Federal Aviation Administration called and offered a job, and he took it, which facilitated our move to the state of Kentucky where we had lived before when David was serving in the U.S. Army during Operation Desert Shield/Storm.  We had always said we loved Kentucky and had talked about retiring there, so THAT worked out well!

After moving to Kentucky, our two youngest daughters finished high school and our oldest daughter’s then husband, had joined the military and she came to live with us while he was doing some training.  She brought with her our Granddaughter Jessi and her pregnant tummy!  As my birthday approached, so did her due date, and on my Birthday (November 19), I took her to the doctor and they announced she was going to have a baby that day!  So, Rebecca (Nicknamed Reba!) was my Birthday Present that year!

During Brittany’s stay I ultimately had my first back surgery where I had a titanium cage installed and a fusion done.  At this point, I was no longer physically able to stand for 8 to 10 hours a day meeting the physical demands of the job I enjoyed.  So, I threw myself into my hobbies of counted cross-stitch, crocheting, reading, cooking and scrapbooking.

After living in the suburbs of Louisville for a couple years, we bought a house 30 miles away in the little town of Shelbyville.  By this time, Kymberly had moved back to California after graduating high school, and Krystina had just graduated.  Brittany had moved back with her then husband, out of state again. (😥)

Krystina moved out eventually and it was just David and I our dogs Rotunda (another Chihuahua/Pomeranian mix who was 12 years old), and our puppy, Peanut.  Kids and grandkids grew, families grew and, as most “empty nesters” David and I began to enjoy our time together as “just us”.  

Then, at a family get together (I actually don’t remember the date.  One of those “health issues” I experienced was a mini stroke when I was 30 years old caused by birth control pills and my morbid obesity at the time, they concluded.  Thus, the stroke obliterated my able to remember things as well as it use to!) I noticed that Reba was having, what I thought at the time was, dry skin issues.  I began to take notice and pay attention to the things with other family members and their skin.  ( I guess that was Medical Assistant in me!)  I was trying to figure out what was causing the problem for her because she complained that the patches itched and sometimes hurt.  Around the same time, David had to have major surgery.  He was diagnosed with an Acoustic Neuroma.  It had attached itself to the working parts of his ear, his facial nerves and his brain stem.  Ultimately, they removed all but a very tiny piece of the Neuroma as well as all of the workings of his ear, so he became completely deaf in that ear, and had a second surgery to install a Cochlear Implant.  As he was healing from that, he neglected to shave and I noticed that he, too, was getting these dry, flaky, itchy patches where his mustache would grow.  And the research began in earnest!

Because I am a redhead (As is Kym, Reba, Annalyna and we haven’t figured out if Zanora is or not!), I have struggled with sensitive skin issues since I was a kid.  I never got a “tan”, I got “pink”, “lobster red” or obtained more freckles.  As I got/get older, I develop(ed) more and more sensitivities to things like laundry detergent and shampoos/conditioners.  So, using my own experiences the first thing I looked at was laundry detergents.  From there I looked at the shampoo/conditioner, and from there it lead me to the “soap” we used in the shower/tub.

The information I was gathering was quite interesting and little shocking, to say the least.  Since I was a kid, I remember seeing commercials on TV about how actual “soap” was bad for the skin, that using XYZ Brand of this or that was more “moisturizing” and better for your skin.  These commercials through my youth, told me that using “soap” was drying, contributed to wrinkles as you age, leaves a “film” on your skin, makes your tub/shower have excessive “soap scum”, etc., but as I was researching, what I found astonished me.  Especially since the TV told me how bad actual SOAP was!  

My first thought after going down this rabbit hole of research was, “Wow, maybe I need to change the stuff we’re washing with”.  Why?  Well, I learned that what I was using at the time, a liquid body wash distributed by a company who’s named after a small white bird (😉) could not legally be called “soap” even though that’s what we all call it.  The process used to make this body wash literally removes the glycerin (something called a “surfactant” that does actually help to moisturize to an extent, but is defined as a compound that lowers the surface tension between two liquids, between a gas and a liquid, or between a liquid and a solid. Surfactants may act as detergents, wetting agents, emulsifiers, foaming agents, and dispersants.), only to add it back in, and the additional additives they actually added to make it “better” for your skin, as was their “claim”, were actually not necessary and were detergents as well.

“DETERGENTS?!”, I thought to myself….”like, I’m actually washing my body with laundry detergent?”  Um… yeah-you are (🤨)!  So, I grabbed my bottle of body wash and started to actually read what I was putting on the biggest organ my body has.  The organ that absorbs everything from environmental pollutants, to what you put on it, to what you ingest.  (Medical training kicking in here again.)

The ingredient list was LONG, containing words I couldn’t even pronounce. (Can you?) Then I thought to look at the “soap” and “body wash” that Reba was using, and read the same ingredients; detergents, etc.  The only difference was they added extra stuff to balance the pH to the eyes (making it “tear free”), rather than the body. What does the pH actually do?  Let’s look at that…

pH stands for potential hydrogen with the “p” meaning potential and the “H” standing for hydrogen. The pH scale is a scale that is used to rank the relative basicity or acidity of substances to other substances, based on the amount of hydrogen ion activity in a substance. (sciencetrends.com)

Now, I could go into and define and describe all the ingredients I’m talking about, but that would be a science lesson in and of itself.  Suffice to say, I didn’t like what I read and learned and thought there had to be something better that would help the dry, itchy skin my loved ones were experiencing.  So, I looked into actual “soap”.  As I was reading about soap I came upon the different FDA laws regarding the making of “soap” both in solid and liquid forms that we were all using.  The FDA has a law that states that the items used to actually wash your body, that you buy at places like the grocery store, or big box stores, cannot legally be called a “soap”.  Because of the additives and processes used to create what we were using, the law states that they have to be called something else.  So, corporate America gave these items names like “Facial Cleansing Bar”, “Moisturizing Body Wash”, etc.  Wait!  What?  You’re telling me that almost 99% of the stuff at the store I buy my family to wash with on a daily basis couldn’t legally be called soap because they’re “detergents” and corporate America is conning the populous at large?  That would be a hard yes.  Well, then…  (Go look at the wrapper or container your current stuff comes in the from the store and see what it’s called… I’ll wait.)

What did washing with detergents do to the skin?  It makes it dry, flaky, itchy and it can exacerbate skin issues that may be underlying such as eczema, psoriasis, allergic dermatitis, the weather, etc.  Well darn!  How do you fix THAT issue?  Back to actual “soap”…

I started to google “soap” and all the sudden a new world opened up to me.  I found all kinds of places that were selling the ingredients to make your own soap at home, videos that showed you from start to finish.  The different ways to make it.  The different ingredients and their benefits… the lists went on and on.  I actually got quite overwhelmed.  So, I just started making notes, and doing more research and watching more videos.  I learned that you can’t make actual SOAP without Sodium Hydroxide (Lye).  Even the “Body Washes” and “Beauty Bars” have Sodium Hydroxide in them.  (Or it’s sibling Potassium Hydroxide, which is used to make a liquid “soap” or “wash”.)  HOWEVER…..

While watching and reading about making SOAP, there were CONSTANT warnings about Lye Safety and how dangerous it is to work with Lye.  The kinds of safety equipment that would be necessary to work with it, and honestly, I got intimidated and scared.  But then I saw something called “Melt and Pour”.  This is a Glycerin based soap that is already “made”, having gone through the processes necessary to make it SOAP.  All you had to do, was melt it in a microwave, color it, add any fragrance or essential oils to it, and pour it in a mold.  You simply let that cool and harden and BOOM, a handmade bar of soap that you’ve made at home.

It was a fun learning experience for sure.  To this day, I still make some of the Melt and Pour soaps and add them to my other soaps and I let the grandkids work with it to make their own for gifts for family members.  But I really wanted to be able to use those fantastic oils and butters that really benefit the skin!  So, I took my Culinary Arts training, and bit the bullet.  Because you’re following a recipe and a technique, it was quite similar to actual cooking!  I watched a thousand more videos, including the ones about Lye Safety, over and over and over again, just to be sure I KNEW what I was doing and felt comfortable enough to work with it.  In the Culinary world we have something called “Mise en Place”, which basically means “everything in it’s place”.  You should get everything out that you plan to use, weigh, measure, the tools, etc.  Everything should be ready before you start.  So, I did that.  Then, I set to work making my first bars of soap made with Sodium Hydroxide, in a design called a “Tiger Stripe”.  I honestly can’t tell you what the scent was, or the colors that I used.  But I remember it was fun!  I was so very proud, looking at that wet soap in the mold…  Now for the Saponification Process.

What is the Saponification Process?   Saponification is a process by which triglycerides (fats) are reacted with sodium or potassium hydroxide (lye) to produce glycerol (emollient) and a fatty acid salt, called “soap.” The triglycerides are most often animal fats or vegetable oils. When sodium hydroxide is used, a hard soap is produced. (thoughtco.com)  This process renders the Sodium Hydroxide (or Potassium Hydroxide) completely inert.  It’s done it’s job of turning the oils, butters and water into a bar of soap.  So, the Sodium/Potassium Hydroxide will in no way negatively affect your skin at all, whereas when soap hundreds of years ago was made, it was hard on the skin.  In fact, my Grandma’s generation still viewed “lye soap” as something quite harsh.  Basically because the lye that was used was made from wood ashes, wasn’t as pure and the science that we use today (computer programs that help to determine the proper amount of Lye, water, oils and butters that will make the best bar of soap, with proper hardness, moisturizing properties, cleansing abilities, bubbles and no harsh or adverse effects from the lye.) hadn’t been invented yet.  They also didn’t have any of the additives that we use today like colloidal oatmeal, milk powders, etc.

So, 24 hours after I made that first loaf of soap, I cut it.  It was the best bar of soap I’d ever seen!    I cut it with a knife I bought specifically for soap.  I cut it unevenly, and I didn’t care.  Then I had to figure out where to let it “cure”.  Curing is where you set the newly made soap aside for 4 to 6 weeks and allow all the excess water left in the soap, after the saponification process, to evaporate, leaving the bar as hard and as long lasting as possible.  I found the perfect place, in my foyer.  Then I immediately wanted to make more…and more…  Pretty soon, my foyer was filled with newly made, curing soap!  Anyone that came to the front door, or entered the house, always asked what smelled so good!

I tested the soap 5 weeks later, as did David, in the shower.  It was bubbly and it was a different feeling on my skin than what I was use to, in a good way.  I felt… cleaner?  Was that the word I’d use?  Yes, it was!  I felt like there was just clean skin there, not something else.  I don’t quite know how to explain it, other than I didn’t feel like I had a thin film of “slime” on my skin that the aforementioned body wash I had been using, left on me that was meant to make my mind think this was a “conditioning, moisturization” of my skin.  It was “slime” to me, now that I had used my brand new bar of soap!  Well, now I was hooked!  David’s skin, after about a week, showed improvement as well!  Holy Heck, what did I just find!?

For the next solid year, I played with different recipes, different oils and butters, different molds, different colors, different additives….  I found a recipe I seriously loved.  I shared the bars with family and friends and finally was told so many times..”This stuff is great!  You should sell it because I’d buy it”.  So, I did.  And Bluegrass Bubbles was born…  We got a business license and became official, then started our website, bluegrassbubbles.com  

In the next installment of the blog, I’ll continue some of the story!  Please remember to share and invite your friends to the blog!  Feel free to ask questions and interact!  

If you’ve not already, please follow us on all our social media and visit our website and sign up for our newsletter!  I share behind the scenes pictures, videos and every now then, a Giveaway where you can win Free Products, including the Candles and other things I make!

[doomonfilm]

Ranking : David Fincher (1962-present)

It takes a special breed of director to take material that many would approach with a basic nature and raise the caliber of the work to memorable levels.  David Fincher could have easily been one of the many cogs in the Jerry Bruckheimer machine, especially after two and a half decades of iconic music video making, but instead, he chose the path of adding extra flair and personal touches to already unique scripts, resulting in a style and emotional tone that is unmatched by his peers, outside of directors the level of Christopher Nolan and so on.  With all that in mind, it’s time to take a stab at ranking the films of one of my favorite modern day creatives.

Editor’s Note : I have not seen Alien 3 in a very long time, and I have yet to see any of the films in the The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo franchise (the first of which David Fincher directed), so until those films are given proper viewings, neither will be on this list.  I will hopefully update the list as I see those films.

9. The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (2008) While pretty astonishing in terms of the aging makeup and effects used to age and de-age Brad Pitt, I did not find much memorable in this film, and thus, have never really felt compelled to return to it.  Taraji P. Henson was impressive, as well as Cate Blanchett and Tilda Swinton, which was a nice turn of events as many of Fincher’s films prior to this were extremely male-fueled and charged, but ultimately, this film personally felt as the most “gimmicky” of his output... better than most films from other directors, but the anchor of this particular list.

8. Gone Girl (2014) It took me way longer than it should have to get around to this film.  Rosamund Pike gave a wonderfully dynamic performance in this film, but as I think back on it, it seems like Gone Girl ended up enhancing Ben Affleck’s performance on the  terms of its material quality, rather than Affleck elevating the material as an actor.  Even with its wonderfully satisfying ending, this film plays it pretty by the book, and knowing what tricks Fincher has up his sleeves, I can call this film more so suitable than mind-blowing.

7. Zodiac (2007) Based on the pure scale alone of this film, not to mention an inherent lack of resolution based on the status of the real life case this film was inspired by, it’s an impressive feat that David Fincher was able to make a compelling film at all.  His All The President’s Men approach of letting journalists (and their inquisitive nature) propel the narrative forward works well, as it leaves room for the killing sequences to be compelling without the burden of carrying the story.  On a purely technical note, the film contains some of Fincher’s best decisions in regards to cinematography, and his text style and implementation on the location inserts became an industry standard for many, many years after Zodiac’s release.

6. Panic Room (2002) Limiting your film into a “bottle”-style would be a crippling application for many directors, but after several sprawling narratives such as Seven, The Game and Fight Club, it was a nice change of pace to see Panic Room, which takes place within the confines of an apartment for the better part of the film’s run.  Not only is this film jam-packed with quality actors giving performances much better than called for in terms of the film’s simple premise (including a performance from Kristen Stewart that immediately put her on my radar), but the extremely subtle use of digital cinematography gives the camera an inquisitive, literal “fly on the wall” feel as it makes moves that a full-sized camera are incapable of.  Probably the most tension-filled film of Fincher’s career as well.

5. Mank (2020) This film has everything needed to be the darling of the 2021 Academy Awards ceremony.  Gary Oldman gives another compelling, immersive, chameleon-like performance (something we as viewers almost take for granted these days in terms of his skill), and the look of the film immediately skews our perception in terms of placing it on the greater Hollywood timeline.  A monumental story about the creation of a monumental film that demands (and earns) all of the respect it received.

4. Seven (1995) The film that made David Fincher a name to be respected in the Hollywood community.  Not only did he come a million miles an hour out of the gate on the first film you could truly call his, but the fact that “What’s in the box?!” has become a line so iconic that people who have never seen the film know it is a testament to the greatness of this movie.  Between the production design and the way that it is shot, it is impossible not to feel this film on extremely deep levels.  The sloth scene still haunts me to this day.

3. The Game (1997) I had the pleasure of seeing this film in theaters during its initial run with absolutely no clue on what it was about, and needless to say, I was made an immediate believer in the cinematic power of David Finch.  Between the equally powerful performances of Michael Douglas and Sean Penn alone, you could call this film a win, but the story is so epic and intriguing that it burns itself into the memory of its fans in a very real way.  Watching Douglas choose to make that leap near the film’s conclusion is such an incredibly cathartic resolution to the film that the eventual swerve hits that much harder.

2. Fight Club (1999) For many fans of David Fincher, and people of a certain age range who may not be familiar with him as a director, this was the defining film of the new millennium’s dawn.  Chuck Palahniuk’s wonderfully strange take on toxic masculinity and the importance of self-identity was transformed into a mesmerizing and curious film, driving home the fact that Edward Norton and Brad Pitt were acting royalty while helping propel Helena Bonham Carter and Jared Leto into a new level of fame.  If not for the number one film on this list, this would have easily gone down as the most efficient and impressive story told in Fincher’s film career.

1. The Social Network (2010) For all the promise that Fight Club showed as the defining movie of the new millennium, The Social Network met and exceeded that promise, and all incredibly close to within 5 years of the date that Facebook, which the film was all about, was created.  Jesse Eisenberg embodied the spirit of Mark Zuckerberg while also helping David Fincher display character and personality traits that Facebook would soon make commonplace in society, and the can’t miss scoring duo of Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross started their wonderful journey with this film.  What could have easily been an Aaron Sorkin-led cultural cash grab was transformed into a masterpiece of immediate relevancy all thanks to the direction of Fincher.

[donveinot]

Journeys in Paganistan (Part 1)

Image by Rafael Javier from Pixabay Editor’s Note: Occult themes abound in children’s literature, on television shows, and in the movies. The entertainment industry has made a handsome profit in selling the supernatural. But as this article by Carl Teichrib demonstrates, there is a reality beyond books and TV screens – a spiritual worldview that honors creation over the Creator. Is a new Pagan age dawning? It appears so. The conference room quickly filled. Already the first day of workshops had wrapped up, and a strange combination of giddy anticipation and serious intentionality was in the air. Greetings and hugs were shared; old friends reconnected, and newcomers were welcomed with nods and smiles. People were visibly excited, for the next hour would be the event’s official opening, a highly charged movement to set the tone for the weekend convention. The room was devoid of chairs, and so the crowd gathered three-and-four deep along the edges, clapping and moving to the sound of inviting rhythms. The center area, however, remained free of attendees, yet it held a focal point: a draped table with seven pillar-candles, a vase, and a large bowl. When things finally settled down, it was explained that what we beheld in the middle was a well, and we were all encouraged to add water to it as we felt lead. This gathering, we were told, was a sacred grove – we were the trees, mystically connected through branches and root. A witch stepped forward, and wand-in-hand she walked around the well, casting a magic circle. Same Yet Different In a hotel conference building in a Minneapolis suburb, amongst the public patrons lodging in this same establishment, a unique gathering took place from March 22-24, 2019. It was the ninth annual Paganicon, a convergence of Witches and Wiccans, Druids, Heathens, Satanists and Luciferians – an eclectic representation of the modern Pagan revival. On Friday morning, before the event began, I asked at the sign-in desk how many were expected; approximately 800 were registered. This was not my first time at Paganicon, the regional conference for the homeland of Paganistan, the affectionate name given by local Pagans for the Twin Cities metro-region. In 2017 I attended for research purposes (see chapter 7 in my book, Game of Gods), and now, two years later, returned to keep current with what was happening in the growing Pagan community. Of special interest was the broad acceptance of Satanism. But hold on, you might be thinking, Satanism and Paganism – isn’t this one and the same? Yes and no. Yes, in that Christians recognize there is, ultimately, no Biblical difference. The ruler of this world (John 12:31), also known as the deceiver, “that serpent of old, called the Devil and Satan” (Revelation 12:9), is the one who tempted in the beginning (Genesis 3:1-5). As the father of lies (John 8:44) who transforms himself into an “angel of light” (2 Corinthians 11:14), Satan is the originator of the first deception, that the creation – Adam and Eve – can be on par with the Creator (Genesis 3:5). This ruse is expanded in the book of Romans, that when we exchange the truth of God for the lie, “we worship and serve the creature rather than the Creator” (Romans 1:25). Granting nature a status of Divinity is the heartbeat of Paganism. Indeed, if I’ve heard one thing from the Pagan community, it is this; we are a religion of nature. Such is the core of Oneness – that God, Man and Nature are essentially the same, which is the opposite of the Biblical worldview – that God is creator, and everything else the creation. No, in that within the Pagan world there are differences in teachings, rituals, and understandings of deities and supernatural entities. For example, when comparing Gardnerian Wicca with Asatru Heathenry, one finds profound distinctions within beliefs and practices. Both are religious movements within the context of neo-Paganism, yet have teachings unique to their own paths. Likewise with Satanism. Interestingly, the Apostle Paul inferred structures and divisions within the supernatural realm, “Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand” (Ephesians 6:11-13). Powers and principalities… this thought struck me as I watched the opening ritual unfold, listening as deities and goddesses were invoked. Listening and Learning As a Christian researcher my primary task is to listen and observe, take notes, and consider how a particular movement is shaping and/or reflecting our times. This includes trying to understand its challenges and issues, and how it views itself in relationship to society – points of contact, and visions of tomorrow. This is what I do when attending any research function, be it an interfaith forum like the Parliament of the World’s Religions, a world government meeting, a transhumanist conference, or a culture-transforming event like Burning Man. During my three days at Paganicon I attended twelve workshops, lectures, and group discussions. Here are some of titles and notes of interest, Blasphemy as a Healing Tool: A Satanist from the Twin Cities opened this talk with a confession; she had no Bibles with her. As it was explained, she normally starts her presentations by tearing up a Holy Bible, standing on its shredded pages, and inviting others to come forth and do likewise. Bibles had been ordered for this workshop but they hadn’t arrived, and she wasn’t able to check into her hotel room yet, so she couldn’t take a copy from there. Her Bible destroying routine wouldn’t be happening. Acts of blasphemy, she elaborated, are more than just a personal slap to the Christian faith; it is her service to the community. Have you been wounded by a church? Do you despise Christianity? Her answer for personal healing is expressions of apostasy and blasphemy. For example, if a formally identified Christian wanted to sever ties to a church, she would draft an official letter of apostasy on his or her behalf. Overt acts of blasphemy were encouraged in conjunction with the notice. What hit me was this: no one has a monopoly on hurting others or being hurt, Christians included – a sad reminder of humanity’s fallen nature – but in hearing her acts of blasphemy, it began to sound less purposeful, and more petulant. Here’s a sober question. Certainly you felt uneasy about shredding Bibles, but did it bother you when I mentioned individuals leaving the Christian faith? This workshop reinforced something I would hear more than once; that many who formerly identified as Christians now follow Pagan paths. For example, during a Saturday panel the question was raised as to which religious affiliations people held before joining the ranks of neo-Pagans: Methodists, Baptists, Lutherans, Catholics, Presbyterians, Pentecostals, Orthodox, and Missionary. Heads around the room nodded in affirmation. In fact, it was acknowledged that a relatively new movement was being born, Christo-paganism – an intentional cross-pollination of Christian teachings with Pagan practices and beliefs. But a form of this has already been happening. Today many churches extol God’s goodness, preach a message of peace, and bend to the world in advancing deep-green causes. In the United Church of Canada hymnal, More Voices, there’s a song to the Greek Goddess of Earth, O Beautiful Gaia. In the Mennonite Central Committee’s publication, Earth Trek, there’s an appeal – bold in the original – that reads: “This week, make an offering to the Earth, in the form of a prayer or some other gift.” Is this not paganism? It certainly fits Romans 1:25, “serving the creature rather than the Creator.” Is this not a form of blasphemy in its own rite? Discernment for Magickal Folks: This was an intriguing presentation, wrestling with the question: how is spiritual discernment exercised? For Christians, we turn to Deuteronomy 18 with its warning not to engage in occult practices, and we look to 1 John 4:1-6 with its testing of the spirits against the Gnostic message. Other examples include how Jesus Christ handled demonic situations, the authority of God used by the Apostles in similar settings, and the Early Church’s reliance on the power of the Holy Spirit. In other words, there is a robust Biblical framework we draw from – including the assurance that our soul is secure, that nothing can separate us from the love of God (Romans 8:31-39). For the Pagan world, which does have spiritual manifestations – invited possessions, entity visitations, and unusual experiences – the question of discernment hangs in the air. It boils down to personal evaluation, we were told, and to aid in this process a worksheet with sample questions was handed out, “Who am I interacting with? Specific Goddex, spirit, my own subconscious, the dead? Who did I perform magic for?... What did I feel/see… what did I want?... Where was I physically… mentally/spiritually? Where did I perform the magic, and for what reason?” It was noted that Pagans are prone to a lack of discernment, as the quest for spiritual experiences often outweighs cautionary factors. There is an addictive quality too, it was said, with a reminder that supernatural encounters can be manipulative. We were warned that if the “inner voice changes” it may be an outside entity probing inward. Furthermore, if negative experiences are causing fear and anxiety, then participants were encouraged to seek counseling and therapy. Hotline telephone numbers for suicide prevention and mental health were printed on our worksheets.(Part 2 next week)Ω

Carl Teichrib is a researcher, writer, and lecturer focusing on the paradigm shift sweeping the Western world, including the challenges and opportunities faced by Christians. Over the years he has attended a range of internationally significant political, religious, and social events in his quest to understand the historical and contemporary forces of transformation – including the Parliament of the Worlds Religions, Burning Man, and the United Nations Millennium Forum. Since the mid-1990s, Carl’s research has been utilized by numerous authors, media hosts and documentary producers, pastors, professors and students, and interested lay people. From 2007 until the end of 2015, he edited a monthly web-based magazine, Forcing Change, documenting and detailing the worldview revolution underway – points of pressure, forces of change.

Available Online He frequently speaks to church groups, in conference settings, and occasionally teaches a modular course on Secular/Pagan Trends at Millar College of the Bible. Carl’s book, Game of Gods: The Temple of Man in the Age of Re-Enchantment, was released in October 2018. You can find him online at: Game of Gods: The Temple of Man in the Age of Re-Enchantment © 2020, Midwest Christian Outreach, Inc All rights reserved. Excerpts and links may be used if full and clear credit is given with specific direction to the original content. Read the full article

[ofheroesandvillains]

Changing Gears

Tony Stark/Reader

Words: 3223

Warnings: None

Summary: What if there was another person with Tony since the very beginning? That’s where you come in. Despite his questionable ways, he was all you wanted and something you didn’t think you could ever have. When you reach your limit, will he finally show you that he can be a better man than you ever expected him to be? Probably going to have 2 more parts.

I own zero gifs :P

Tony Stark was not an easy man to live with.

Or negotiate with.

Or threaten apparently.

Tony Stark just wasn’t an easy man in general…unless you were a tall blonde with a great rack, if the sounds echoing through the Malibu home were anything to go by. In that case, he was a very easy man.

The annoyingly persistent blonde reporter he had picked up on his way home from the Apogee Award presentation in Vegas –Christine, if you recalled correctly- was making a racket. What the hell are they doing in there? Whatever it was, it didn’t sound healthy.

You tried to negotiate with Tony, insisting that he could do whatever he wanted with whomever he wanted, provided that it didn’t happen inside the house. But as per usual, he kept his word for a solid 5 minutes, before conviniently forgetting all about it as soon as something pretty in a skirt walked by.

Then you tried threatening him. In fact, it was his final warning. Unlike Tony, while you yourself were quite brilliant intellectually, you did try to get the recommended 8 hours of sleep that most sane people needed to function properly. So his constant disregard for your own needs had driven you to threatening him –either he started being more considerate, or you’d find somewhere else to live and do your work.

You didn’t want it to come to that, and part of you knew that it was an empty threat…and if you knew that, then so did Tony. Which was probably why he was currently making your ears bleed.

After wrapping a pillow around your head did nothing to muffle the sounds coming from down the hall, you did the only thing you could do. Escape downstairs into the workshop. It wasn’t the cosiest of places, but there was a comfy couch down there that looked like heaven itself as soon as you realised that absolutely no noise could be heard. Not a single sound.

It was perfect.

You loved Tony, you really did. He was your oldest friend, and the two of you were inseperable usually, to the point where he had even offered you a very high ranking position in Stark Industries. But one of the reasons you fit so well together, was because of your obvious differences.

Where he was brash and imuplsive, you were more methodical and cautious. Where he he was immature and arrogant, you were mature and humble. Your higher level of intellect was what bound you together. You were like two sides of the same coin, and even though he didn’t have some of the best qualities, you loved him all the same.

More than you should have.

You knew you saw him in a different way to how he saw you…you were just that same shy little girl he had met eons ago. He became the cool teenager already enrolled at MIT, while you were only 8 years old when your father passed and you were left on Howard's doorstep. It was only when you became a teenager yourself that you started seeing Tony in a different way. It was obviously a strange thought, but now in adulthood, the age difference didn’t really matter. At least it didn’t matter to you…Tony was a different story.

He never gave anything away, and you didn’t either. Tony hid any of his true feelings for anything and everything quite well, behind a strong mask of sarcasm and arrogance. Sure, he could jokingly flirt (and boy did he jokingly flirt) with you, but you knew not to take it too seriously, it wouldn’t end well if you did. You’d seen many a nameless one-night-stand do the walk of shame whenever Pepper came over to do Tony’s job for him, and that was not a look you were going to wear.

You cared about him too much, too much to risk losing him as a friend by admitting your feelings. No one knew you felt that way about him, most of the time you acted more like a mother than anything else, a role you shared with both Pepper and Rhodey.

You didn’t know where you’d be without them.

While Pepper took care of things from a business perspective, you were stuck making sure he stayed alive. Was he eating? Did he have enough water today? Did he actually end up getting sleep last night?

Most of the time he would roll his eyes in good humour, and a war of snarky words would ensue. That was something he really enjoyed –the fact that you could keep up with him. It was something that not many people could do, but your dry humour and blunt criticisms were music to his ears. His favourite habit was trying to get a rise out of you, it seemed. The fact that it was exceptionally hard to do so was what made him try even harder.

With a glance at the clock ticking above one of the workbenches, you sighed in defeat. 4:27am. Obviously, you weren’t getting any sleep tonight, Tony and your rampaging thoughts made sure of that.

With that in mind, you kicked the blanket that you had dragged downstairs off of you, and headed back up to the bathroom to prepare for an early start.

“Oooh, serious face. Wish me luck, J.A.R.V.I.S.”

“I do believe Miss Y/L/N does not wish to be distur-” The smooth beep of the glass sliding door allowing Tony access into his own workshop, cut the AI off and if J.A.R.V.I.S had eyes, you could bet your ass that he’d be rolling them.

“Someone’s up early! Music, J.A.R.V.I.S.” Tony’s upbeat voice cut through the silent cocoon you had surrounded yourself with, and you sighed silently, unwilling to show any outward signs of annoyance when the AI did as it was told.

A lack of sleep usually left you cranky, today was already shaping up to be a bad day, and it was only 8:19 in the morning. One thing Tony knew well was that you had no trouble holding a grudge. It didn’t matter how much he begged or nagged you, the only person who decided when to let it go was you.

Noticing your lack of reply, the billionaire slowly came to a halt as he approached your work station, dark eyes assessing silently for a change.

“You seem mad. Are you mad? You’re mad, aren’t you?” He rattled off quickly with lightly furrowed brows.

He always made it look like he couldn’t tell, but Tony was too smart to not be able to pick up on a person’s mood as soon as he entered a room…especially someone he knew so well. You always just assumed that he found it easier to ask and make a joke out of it than actually have to directly address emotions. It was just how he was, and you were okay with that.

“No, Tony. I’m not mad.”

His eyes narrowed at your flat tone. You hadn’t even bothered to look up at him, hands still working away at the tiny device that was your latest project. The small disc-charges were intricate little things that required a steady hand, unless you wanted to feel the 30,000 volts of electricity first hand –and you really didn’t want that.

The idea was that they could be used to incapacitate targets quickly and efficiently. The small size allowed them to be easily concealed, and you were excited to be working on something on your own this time around. Designing military weaponry was better suited to Tony, you preferred the smaller gadgets designed to be used by the individual. You could easily convince yourself that what you were making was for self-defence that way, rather than a weapon of war that could wipe out thousands in the blink of an eye.

“You’re not?” Tony’s words were drawn out, his brows rising to show he wasn’t convinced.

Your eyes were still trained on the disc, and he would have at least quirked a smile at the comical size of your eye through the huge magnifying glass that Dum-E was holding for you as you tinkered with the disc-charge. But he didn’t laugh, and he didn’t smile, because you were mad…and he didn’t like that.

Never one to remain patient for very long, Tony quickly snatched the magnifying glass, ushering Dum-E away and ignoring your indignant ‘hey!’ of protest.

Tony held the handle in his right hand, tapping his left palm with the glass, while watching you glare up at him. He was completely unfazed, and that just made you crankier.

“So, you wanna tell me what’s got your feathers all ruffled?”

You refrained from rolling your eyes, but did roll your wheelie chair forward to take back the magnifying glass. He put up a fight, and a short game of tug-of-war ensued before he finally let go.

He took your silence as a display of rebelliousness, but in truth, you were just trying to figure out what to say.

Oh nothing, Tony. I’m just angry that I didn’t sleep a wink last night because you were busy going at it with yet another one-night-stand, which may or may not hurt to even think about because I love you but I can’t tell you that. But I’m not jealous, I’m completely fine. I’m great, you asshole. 

Yeah…maybe not.

That wasn’t just something you could blurt out. Maybe if Tony wasn’t Tony, and didn’t push away those who loved him romantically…maybe then you could admit it. But the truth of the matter was, that anyone who professed their love for him was likely never seen again. No, they weren’t killed or anything, he just avoided them like the plague.

“Alright, fine.”

You knew that tone, it was his ‘challenge accepted’ tone. A tone that had the potential to make or break someone. Never underestimate Tony Stark when he takes that tone.

“J.A.R.V.I.S, why is Y/N mad at me?”

“According to my observations, Miss Y/L/N’s current mood is a result of both a lack of sleep, and the volume of your fornication with Miss Everheart last night, sir.”

Tony grimaced, his shoulders slumping when you beckoned Dum-E back over and resumed your work. You always had a soft spot for Dum-E.

“Oh…you, uh, you heard that, huh?” He scratched the back of his neck uneasily. He didn’t know why that thought bothered him. It’s not like you didn’t know what he would be doing that night.

You were there in Vegas, granted you actually went to the Apogee Award presentation with Obidiah, instead of hitting the casinos with him. But there was a woman on his arm at every turn, and you even had to share a car with him and Katherine…Kirsty? Kerry? Whatever. She was just another pretty face that he’d already forgotten.

Still, it bothered him. It almost felt like he didn’t want you knowing about that, despite the fact that the whole world knew Tony Stark was a playboy.

“It was kinda hard not to. Right, J?”

He winced at the sarcastic tone, and made a mental note to tell Pepper to buy you something nice. He didn’t know how else to make you feel better. He’d bring in some new part, or maybe a new car? No, a plane! Yes, that was it. A plane��why did he feel like he was forgetting something?

“Indeed, madam. Had we any neighbours, I’m certain they too would share your current mood.”

‘Traitor’, Tony thought while he glared up at the ceiling, as if the AI was somehow embedded in it. He hated when they ganged up on him, and they always did. J.A.R.V.I.S never sided with him, and he had long ago suspected that you must have tampered with the AI’s protocols to make sure of it.

Before Tony could even attempt digging himself out of his current predicament, the loud ‘click-clack’ of heels could be heard making their way down the stairs, and he quickly made himself look busy. He almost groaned at the sight of Pepper, prim and proper, and ready to kick his ass because–

“You’re supposed to be halfway around the world right now.”

You felt the smile slip onto your face as soon as Tony’s music cut out and Pepper’s stern tone replaced it instead. Tony was meant to be presenting the Jericho missile in Afghanistan. Rhodey had specifically told him to not be late, if you recalled correctly, and yet here he was. If there was one thing that you didn’t like about Tony, it was how inconsiderate he could sometimes be to those who cared about him most.

You knew there was nothing wrong with his memory, in fact, he had an outstanding capacity to remember almost everything he saw with his own eyes or heard with his own ears. So you couldn’t understand why he didn’t care enough to do Rhodey this one favour and show up on time.

It left you wondering. Rhodey was his best friend, and there was little that Tony wouldn’t do for the man in all seriousness. But he almost always put his wants first, and it was frustrating to deal with when you were already in a bad mood. Sometimes –even though you’d never admit it- you wished he could behave a bit more like his father, at least where Stark Industries was involved.

His father had been best friends with your own, they were business partners much like you and Tony were now. The only difference was that you worked behind the scenes, you designed and created, but tried to lead as private of a live as possible considering you were both in the spotlight, and under the microscope at all times.

Tony, on the other hand, thrived in the spotlight. America loved Tony Stark, and his popularity and ability had led to him neglecting his responsibilities over the years. He was used to other people doing things for him –wanting to do things for him- even though he could do whatever it was far better himself.

Which is exactly what Pepper was ranting about right now. As her and Tony went toe-to-toe in a verbal sparring match so rapid it would make any sane man’s head spin, you continued your work silently. From priceless paintings and exhibitions, to MI commencement speeches, Pepper shot through it all in the space of a minute. Before the topic finally settled on something that didn’t lead to an argument. Pepper’s plans for the evening.

You knew she was going out for dinner with Happy, they had secretly decided to test the waters and you couldn’t be happier for either of them. They were both great people who had been in your life for a very long time, and deserved all the happiness in the world.  

“Hey, Y/N? It’s Pepper’s birthday.” The billionaire stated while pointing a wrench at the strawberry blonde, as if you hadn’t been in the same room the entire time listening.

“I’m aware…” Only then did you allow yourself to swivel around and offer Pepper a warm smile. “Happy birthday, Pepper. I hope you liked your present.”

She returned the smile gratefully.

“I did, thank you. It’s lovely and incredibly expensive…you shouldn’t have,” she gave you a look of disapproval that had you feeling like a little kid being reprimanded by a parent, but you just waved her off impatiently.

“Pepper, considering what you have to deal with everyday –or should I say who you have to deal with…” you glanced at Tony accusingly, and continued despite the mock look of offence he shot you. “…I don’t think anything I could buy you is expensive enough.”

“Hey!”

You both ignored him.

“Well I’m very grateful, thank you.” Pepper replied tactfully, as she always did. She was nothing if not graceful. You almost envied it, but then you remembered how much effort it would take and thought better of it.

By the time Pepper was ready to leave, she had already packed Tony’s bags and the billionaire had reluctantly left you alone for a little while.

You sighed wearily when he walked back upstairs. You didn’t like making him feel bad, and you knew that he did feel guilty whenever he noted your bad mood. But sometimes it was the only way to get him to see that you really meant it. Otherwise he’d just brush off your concerns like he always did with Rhodey, and you didn’t have the temper to deal with that.

You loved Tony as he was, but he was the smartest man you had ever met and you knew that he knew when he was in the wrong. He just didn’t care much for it at the moment, and you really hoped that he would eventually.

“Pepper’s tearing me a new ass hole, I gotta get going.”

You finally turned around to look over at Tony, and hadn’t even noticed that he had returned. But there he stood in his designer clothes, looking as good as ever. You offered him a small smile, and told yourself the spark in his eyes when he noticed it was just a figment of your imagination.

“Come here…” His voice was softer when he nodded you over.

You obliged, dropping the screwdriver in your hand onto the bench top gently, before letting him pull you into a rare hug. Your body melted into his own without permission, and your shoulders that were previously tensed in agitation, relaxed in his hold.

“I know I screwed up, and I promise you I’ll make up for it when I get back, okay?”

With his hands on either one of your shoulders, he pulled you back slightly so that you could see the sincerity in his gaze. Your lack of response left him nervous, and his eyes flickered between your own for reassurance.

“Okay? We’ll talk as soon as I land.” You nodded in acceptance, and had to fight to keep the smile off of your face as he continued. You failed.

“I’ll even bring you back a souvenir. Hm…you know what we could do? Me, you, private yacht, The Bahamas? I’ll even rub lotion on your back, of course you’d need to be naked- hey!” He jerked back to avoid the light smacks you were giving his shoulder, grinning happily when you laughed. “All I’m saying is that nobody likes tan lines…”

That pulled another chuckle out of you, and he joined in this time. You really were something, especially when you laughed.

“Tony!”

His smile dropped to a grimace real quick. Pepper was sometimes a little terrifying.

“Well, I better go.”

You smiled genuinely this time, and gave him a nod. “Yeah, good idea.”

“I’ll see ya soon, hold the fort ‘til I get back?”

You rolled your eyes in good humour. “Oh, please. I hold the fort when you’re here too.”

He nodded with a bittersweet look on his face. That was…that was true. “Right.”

“Hey, Tony?” He turned to look back just before he reached the stairs. “Be careful, yeah?”

The billionaire gave his usual million dollar smile.

“Always.”

[50cyg]

I love the Chosen Children, in case people get confused

So I want to take some time to make my feelings clear on some stuff in case anyone misinterprets me, as my posts/ comments can sometimes seem to contradict each other

First of all, I’m a human, and therefore my feelings on things are complex

Secondly, I am very open to hearing other people’s opinions and so my opinions are constantly being changed and shaped as I see and learn new things through the eyes of others

Third, I try to be objective and am very much in favor of constructively criticizing a character no matter how much I love them

Fourth, I’m super emotional and yeah I get angry sometimes when I see characters I love getting bashed, or seemingly getting bashed and it takes me a moment to calm down and I’m likely to lash out at first

All this being said I want to make it clear that I do not hate any of the Chosen Children, not a single one, I like all 13 of them for reasons, and I dislike all 13 of them for reasons. Some of them I love because there are more things about them that I like than things I dislike, and some I think are just okay because I dislike more things than I like. But I think every single one of them is worthy of praise and every single one of them makes me happy for one reason or another. At the same time, I think every single one of them has moments where I think they deserve criticism whether it be because I feel the writing was mediocre or because they actually have character flaws (which btw is fine, character flaws are good but that doesn’t mean we don’t acknowledge that they are flaws)

Digimon is my favourite series of all time, I can’t not want to love and praise every character that appears in it

Taichi Yagami: I love this kid so much, I could sing his praises all day and I do, I rant for hours to friends about how much I love him. That being said I have mixed feelings on his conflict in Tri and still feel I would have liked something a little different

Yamato Ishida: I love this kid so much, heck I might like him more than Taichi. That being said, I will not defend him when he does something wrong and he does have character flaws. Like when he yells at Takeru in episode 23, I think he was being a total jerk when he did that, and I think it was wrong of him. Does this mean I disliked that scene? Of course not, I love that Yamato has the flaws that he does and sometimes acts like a jerk or an idiot. 

Mimi Tachikawa: My favourite female character of all time (she was briefly overthrown by Pidge from VLD but it didn’t last and she just barely surpasses Hagar Shipley from ‘The Stone Angel’, Wonder Woman can take 4th place :P). She is an incredibly well written female character who is lovable, but also has believable flaws and is well rounded. She is also an incredibly strong character and I think she should be next in line for leadership should Taichi ever die or resign. I also find I relate to her in some key areas that helped make me feel good about myself, and I honestly cry sometimes when I think about her and how much I want someone like her as a friend. That being said, like I mentioned, she has flaws, and I will reprimand her for those flaws, like in episode 25, she does a lot of shitty things in episode 25. 

Koushiro Izumi: One of the few characters I don’t I have any issues with, except maybe that he’s a bit OP. His flaws boil down to being social awkward (which just makes him really endearing to me and honestly I relate to a lot of the stuff he does),and sometimes inadvertently hurting peoples feelings (specifically Mimi’s and Meiko’s but I really take his side in both cases so...). Basically, I love this character and enjoy every moment he is on screen and all of his character development, of which he gets some amazing character development, of all the kids so far in Tri his story line was my favourite.

Jyou Kido: One of the characters that when I see anything negative about him, even when it’s pointing out character flaws that I complete agree exist and are flaws, I get super defensive and am prone to lash out. I love him, but he does have character flaws and if you get me when I’m being rational and calm I will admit they are flaws but that they are also a huge reason why I love him. 

Hikari Yagami: Unlike the other’s, my feelings are more mixed on this character, and I’m also super hypocritical when it comes to her. I cannot stand it when anyone says anything bad about her but then I will also say the exact same things that I get mad at people for saying. For example, if you call her a Mary-Sue I will want to punch you but then at the same time I am willing to admit that she is a Mary-Sue, and that her personality is lacking by comparison to the other 5 above. Again though I will also defend her to the end of the earth and contradict myself on a regular basis cause I’m very biased in her favour.

Sora Takenouchi: The Chosen Child I have the most complex relationship with. If someone asked me my opinion on her I’d have to admit I don’t really like her, but that’s because she is competing against such great characters that by comparison, in my opinion, she seems very lacking. However, she is a very well written female character and would rank in my top 20 female characters for sure, I just think Digimon suffers from having too many characters and if I could eliminate some of them so the others got more screen time then she’d be my first pick out of the original 8. But I was incredibly invested in every single moment she was on screen in Loss (with the exception of when she is talking to Meiko, because I didn’t care for that scene). Also, her moments with Taichi and Yamato in all of Tri are fantastic.

Takeru Takaishi: As a child I loved this kid, as an adult not so much. I find him to be a bit annoying in 01 and 02. Originally I had issues with him in Tri as well but he does have some fantastic moments, most of which happen when he is teasing his brother :P I don’t like his relationship with Hikari though, also I’m a Meikeru shipper. Overall I don’t like him that much but he has moments that make me incredibly happy and so I still like to see him.

And now onto the other 5, this is where things get complicated.

I have grown to like the 02 kids, I like Miyako, Daisuke and Ken all more than I like Sora and Takeru. That being said, when 02 was first released and Sora, Mimi, Taichi, Yamato and Jyou were all sidelined for these new characters 8 year old me was pissed off. And no matter how much I like Daisuke, Ken and Miyako, if someone said I could go back and retcon 02 in favour of a sequel that focused on the original 8 I would do it in a heartbeat. 

When I say I like Meiko but feel she should not exist in Tri, it’s because I feel the exact same way about Ken, Miyako and Daisuke when it comes to 02 (though I like Daisuke, Miyako and Ken considerably more than Meiko). I just want a sequel focusing on characters I have grown to love over time and not get introduced to new ones who take time away from characters I love and want to see more of. 

And yes I know that the same can be said for Hikari and how she showed up later on and took time away from the already established 7 but like I said before I am biased in her favour and aware of it. 

And although I would love to see Ken, Daisuke and Miyako again I am very much okay with them not showing up because it means other characters I like more such as Taichi, Yamato, Jyou, Mimi, Koushiro and Hikari all get more screen time. The only issue I have with them not appearing is the fact that Tri acknowledges their existence and yet the Original kids are not actively freaking out that they can’t find them... there are a few times where they try to contact them and then they just leave it alone... it’s like they don’t even care all that much, so much for friendship -_- 

This post is already really long so I’m not going to get into my detailed feelings on the 02 kids, just know that I like and dislike aspects of their characters and arcs same as any of the other kids and that it took a long time for me to learn to like them.

As for Meiko, I’m biased in her favour. I like Moe characters (Hinata is one of my favourite characters in Naruto), and I think she’s cute. However I also think she has many aspects that are poorly written and she has flaws for which she is never reprimanded for and this upsets me because it makes me feel like the writers are trying to tell us they aren’t actually flaws. I really can’t stand the antis or the defenders, one side does nothing but trash talk her and the other side does nothing but sing her praises, they push each other more and more into their respective corners until both sides are being completely irrational and refuse to budge.

This has been my response to the discourse as well as me explaining that just because I say negative things about a character does not mean there are not things I also love about the character and visa versa. Again, I’m human and my feelings are therefore complex.

I will conclude by saying I apologize for getting caught up in the discourse, but I just don’t like it when any character is defended to the ends of the earth by fans or bashed by fans, so I always feel the need to comment and play ‘Devil’s Advocate’... I guess, even though I know I should leave it alone.

[kaykaydirectorsnotebook-blog]

The Characters In This Scene

Mary Warren

Mary Warren is a young seventeen year old girl, with brown hair. She is one of the girls that testify against witches of the town. She is quite naive, as she will listen to what Abigail tells her to do, without questioning. She convinces herself, at first, that there truly were spirits and the woman accused were witches. As a result, she thinks that the girls are doing god’s work by identifying the devil’s servants.  Mary Warren sees these trials as new found entertainment, she is excited to go to court, delighted that she is needed for the trials and proud to be one of the court officials. She is scared of Abigail and her threats, therefore does not disobey her. In addition, she is scared about people finding out about what happened in the forest with the girls. Most of all, she is scared of being accused of witchcraft.

Quote That speaks It all

“To Proctor: I only hope you’ll not be so sarcastical no more. Four judges and the King’s deputy sat to dinner with us but an hour ago. I - I would have you speak civilly to me, from this out.” (p 60)

Mary is standing up to Proctor as her rank in society, she believes, is more important and significant now that she is considered an ‘official of the court’. Mary and the girls were truly convinced- by Abigail mostly- that they are doing god’s work and therefore are justified to act bolder than usual.

Costumes

As Mary warren is a servant, she should wear a simple white apron. Under it, she wears a black long sleeved shirt that covers her arms and a long skirt ankle- length so that it covers her legs. With on her head a white cloth hat that covers most of her hair.

Delivery of lines

In this act, Mary Warren should have a newly confident voice, loud, defiant, and strong intonation, as in this scene she is trying to prove herself to Proctor. She should gesture a lot (eg.., stomp her foot), as she is passionate during the argument with Proctor. Her voice should be high as we still want to underline that she is still a little girl who is not very aware of her actions and we want her to sound whiny.

John Proctor

Proctor is a farmer in his middle thirties. He was  of powerful of body, even-tempered, and not easily led. He has brown medium length hair. At first he is introduced as the adulterous lover to Abigail. He is well respected and is said to be unforgiving to hypocrites, this is ironic because he criticizes others’ integrity even though he has himself sinned. Throughout the play, Proctor is concerned with keeping up his reputation. He is scared that people will find out about his sin, therefore when Elizabeth asks him to go to talk to Abigail, it angers him. On the other hand, proctor feels guilty about being betraying his wife and wishes to bring his marriage back to life, that is why he lies about being alone with Elizabeth. John is not against religion, but he does not agree with Paris and what he preaches.

Quote That speaks It all

“Proctor: Because it speaks deceit, and I am honest! But I’ll plead no more! I see now your spirit twists around the single error of my life, and I will never tear it free!” (p 61)

Proctor is an ‘honest’ man, yet he faulted Elizabeth and he feels guilty as it undermines his decency. He is trying to fix his marriage, but he feels like his mistake will always haunt him, as it now threatens Elizabeth’s life as well.

Costumes

Because Proctor is a farmer, his clothes should be simple, no expensive clothing, no extravagant structure or expensive fabric. He should wear long pants and high knees boots to be able to go in the dirt and mud. A long sleeved fleece shirt, nothing very heavy because he stays out in the sun laboring the land a lot and a jacket over them. He wears a hat to cover his head from the sun.

Delivery of lines

When talking to Marry Warren he should be tough and angry as he is her superior and she is disobeying him. He is unaware of the witch trials’ advancement, therefore he should be surprised when told how many and which women are accused. When talking to Elizabeth, he should feel guilty at first, then so as to gain back respect, he should be mad and loud when talking having the argument with her. When Hale enters, he should feel embarrassed at first, then as he is a very proud man indignant at the questioning of his religion. He should always portray a facade of confidence in what he believes in.  

Elizabeth Proctor

Elizabeth, also called Goody Proctor is the mother of two children and the wife of farmer John Proctor. She is introduced for the first time in Act 2. She is known as a very honest and irreproachable woman, this makes John guiltier about his affair, as he feels very judged by her. Her husband 8 months back took a lover, their old servant, Abigail. Since then, their marriage has been full of tension and she finds it hard to trust him, but is willing to always be loyal to him. She has not totally forgotten although she loves him In this Act, she has an argument with her husband after being informed by Mary Warren that her name came up in court for Witchcraft. She knows then that Abigail surely mentioned it and requests of her husband to appeal to his ex lover. She feels undermined by Proctor as though he does not understand that she is “the only wife he has” and resents what he did. She fears Abigail’s determination to take her down and replace her and worries about the growing power of the girls at court.

Quote that speaks it all

“Spoke or silent, a promise is surely made. And she may dote on it now - I am sure she does - and thinks to kill me, then to take my place. “ (p 62)

Elizabeth worries Abigail wishes to take her place. She is sure that her husband has not made it clear to Abigail that he does not care for her and that unless he does what she urges him to do, break this promise made in bed, Abigail has reason to hope for a future with John.

Costumes

As this takes place in 1692 Salem in a puritan village, Elizabeth conforms to the acceptable clothing of that time, which is very conservative. Like Proctor, she does not wear anything expensive or sophisticated, as even though she tries to be feminine, she is still a farmer’s wife. She wears a coif, a white cloth worn as a hat on her head, even at home. She should wear a high neck white shirt, to symbolize how pure she is alike a white dove. Over her shirt she wears a waistcoat alike the shirt it should be beige or white. Then she wears a pleated skirt that is ankle length to cover as much skin as possible.

Delivery of Lines

In the beginning of Act 2, Elizabeth speaks with a lot of emotion as she is very passionate and what she says matters to her. It is supposed to be to her like a secret that has finally come out; she finally voices her unhappiness and reproaches John. Her voice is firm, she is bold, standing up for what she has the right to think. On the other hand, when her husband shouts back she hesitates, as she does not want to disrespect him, but she wants to speak up. She is supposed to be emotional. She has learned that her husband’s ex lover is trying to get her hanged and she blames him for it, making her tone angry. Then, when Mr Hale arrives, she barely speaks, instantly lowers her voice, and tries her best to mask the fact that she is embarrassed that he heard parts of the argument. She offers him something to drink like a respectable hostess and wife, and only speaks again when Proctor forgets his last commandment. To that, she reminds him, masking her reprimanding tone in front of Hale.

Reverend Hale 

Reverend Hale is a pastor, an intellectual, expert of the supernatural, devil’s work, and witchcraft. Initially, Reverend Hale is called to Salem from Beverly to examine the unnatural events occurring in the town, notably Betty’s illness; later he stays and is bewildered by the advancement of the witch trials. He is a sincere man, who, at first, truly believes that witchcraft is very prominent in Salem and trusts his abilities to help. Then, after Rebecca Nurse is accused and he talks to the proctors, he starts to doubt of the intentions behind each of the accusations. Although he feels like a stranger in Salem, he does not hesitate to get involved and question the judges and the girls’ claims. He believes in justice and tries to get to the bottom of the accusations knocking from door to door to verify the claims. 

Quote that speaks all

“I am a stranger here, as you know. And in my ignorance I find it hard to draw a clear opinion of them that come accused before the court. And so this afternoon, and now tonight, I go from house to house - I come now from Rebecca Nurse’s house” (p 64)

Reverend Hale is investigating the accusations, not on authority of the court, but for his own inquiry. He takes a step back to be able to make an accurate and clear opinion of wether they are guilty or innocent.

Costume

Reverend Hale wears a hat made of felt with a creased crown to protect from all weather. He wears a clerical collar, a black shirt and a doublet jacket over it. He wears white cuffs and black shorts that end at his knees with stockings under them. Alike women, men hide most of their skin. He wears the typical fitted pastor clothing. Pastors wear sober clothing, so he wears mostly an all black outfit, signifying sobriety, aside from the white cuffs and the white collar.

Delivery of Lines

In this scene, Reverend Hale comes to question the Proctors on their religion and faith. His tone is somewhat suspicious and his questions interpreted as accusing. His voice is calm and collected. He is merely trying to gather information on the accusations and fairly investigate the trials’ legitimacy. When talking about god and his mission his voice is confident as he is very confident in his beliefs and very religious.

[skytranslates]

Mega Man X: The Novel Chapter 1

Aaaaaallllright, it’s been a while, but the first chapter is finally done!! Many thanks to my translator @melonjaywalk and my editors moidang, Lambency and tjerrian! If you’d like to follow the group’s progress on the novel, check out this Google Doc! Without further ado, here’s Chapter 1: Day of Sigma!

P・1・2・3・4・5・6・7・8・9・10・11・12・13・A

“Heh heh heh… Why X-- aren’t you a pitiful sight?”

The Ride Armor pinned me down, fingers groaning as it tightened its grip on me. Against the ground, I couldn't see my opponent at all, but I didn't need to: I already knew him well.

“Grck.... Vile! Have you really gone Maverick!?”

“Obviously. There’s fewer strings attached -- it’s way better. Why don’t you become a Maverick too?”

“Don’t screw with me!”

He was being facetious, trying to see if I'd give myself away as a Maverick on top of suggesting it would be better that way.

“Why… Why are you people doing this!?”

I wonder, do these sound like the words of a former Maverick Hunter?

My name is X.

I’m a B-Class Maverick Hunter in the 17th Elite Unit. Regardless of my rank, it has… become my duty to fight countless enemies. In the wake of countless tragedies, the Maverick Wars had begun….

A few hours ago:

I was with Zero--my mentor, friend, and a Special A-Class Maverick Hunter--when we received a report of a Maverick incident. Dispatch sent us to a military facility in the southern part of the city to investigate.

“Sure is quiet for an incident…”

“No signs of damage, either... Maybe they were mistaken.”

There wasn’t a single trace of Mavericks, humans, Reploids, or even Mechaniloids, so we concluded that it was likely a false report, and tried to contact Hunter HQ.

“...Huh? That’s weird. I’m not getting any response from HQ.”  Zero tried several channels but encountered static each time.

My luck was no better.

“I can’t seem to, either.”

Strange. The common and dedicated lines weren’t working?

“...Do you think something’s happened at HQ? Or maybe someone’s jamming the signal nearby.”

“The former’s unlikely… so it must be the latter. X, let’s try to find better reception. Not much more we can do here.”

“Understood. Let’s hurry, Zero.”

We swept through the area once more to confirm the situation, leaving the matter of our original target, the military facility, for later. We took the highway leading back to the city on our Ride Chasers--high-powered air bikes--but came to a stop upon noticing a disquieting pattern.

“...Huh? Zero, something’s wrong… It’s dark out, but I don’t see a single vehicle anywhere.”

It was July 4th, 21XX, just past 20:00. On a weekend, there weren’t as many cars around, but for there not to be a single one? To add to that, even the typical Mechaniloids that ran around the clock were nowhere to be found.

“...Looks like something might’ve gone down while we were away, after all.”

When Zero and I headed out, everything was normal: plenty of vehicles and Mechaniloids around and running. Now? The emptiness was utterly bizarre.

“It feels like all the activity from earlier just up and vanished…” No matter how far and wide we looked, we couldn’t find anything at all. It was like a ghost town. “I’ve got a bad feeling about this… Zero, let’s keep going!”

This city of ours… What was going on?

As our sense of unease grew, Zero and I plunged deeper into the city.

"What... What’s going on!?"

"It's like a warzone... Hey, hang in there! What happened!?"

We'd been on the highway for about an hour, but when we finally arrived, the place was demolished, the Mechaniloids were out of control… And amidst the ruins, we found a young, injured Reploid.

The sheer amount of damage he’d sustained burned itself deeply into my memory.

"This was...caused by a buster...?"

The same kind of weapon I carried caused these injuries: a buster cannon, meant for combat.  

You could expect to see damage like this on the body of a Maverick who'd been taken down by a Hunter. But this Reploid was no Maverick; he was a civilian.

"Mmgrck... A... Maverick... Hunter...?"

The young Reploid wouldn't survive his injuries; he’d taken a fatal shot to head. There was nothing I could do.

I wondered if he already knew.

With the last of his strength, he ejected a single memory chip from a slot in the side of his head; Zero palmed it without a word.

"Sig... Sigma..."

"Sigma?  Did something happen to the Commander?"

"..."

The young Reploid's systems went into terminal shutdown, leaving our questions unanswered. He appeared to be sleeping, but he was gone.

"What the hell happened here in the last few hours..." Zero muttered under his breath as he laid the Reploid back on the ground, one hand still balled around the chip.

No matter how much we wished otherwise, there was nothing we could do for him now. But he'd given us a potential clue; one that we wouldn’t waste.

"Zero, let's head back to HQ. I'm starting to worry."

“You’re right. Let's check this chip first, though. We need intel."

Zero inserted the chip into the Ride Chaser's onboard monitor before he'd even finished talking.

With a whirr from the reader, footage from the chip began its playback.

I couldn’t even begin to grasp what we saw.

"...If this is real, then this isn't just some random incident. This is big."

I couldn't respond; the words just wouldn't come out.

I had no idea how to react--not after being shown something like this.

“This is worse than anything we could’ve prepared for. We might be machines, but this is like a nightmare.”

It truly was a nightmare--a recording that left you wishing you could just wake up and leave it behind.

It was to be expected: as a Maverick Hunter, you were bound to witness tragedy. What had transpired here, though, went far beyond anything I’d ever encountered before. There was no doubt Mavericks existed, not anymore.

It’d never crossed my mind that a day could come where I’d go Maverick, too. Not even once. But this was why we took it upon ourselves to be Maverick Hunters, to protect humans and Reploids who lived peacefully from the threat of mayhem and violence.

In a sense, it was a way to convince ourselves. You tell yourself that, as a Maverick Hunter, you’ll never become a Maverick. The reality was that year after year, the number of Mavericks kept rising. In spite of that, the Hunters continued to work together to fight for and protect humans and civilian Reploids from harm.

In this way, we maintained peace.

And yet, the memory chip entrusted to us contained footage of Maverick Hunters slaughtering civilian Reploids.

“There’s no way… I won’t stand for this!”

I rushed down the highway towards Maverick Hunter HQ; an attack en route left our Ride Chasers destroyed. In light of the message--that Reploid’s last moments--we had to get back to HQ no matter what.

“I’m going to check the vicinity while I try to find another route. You keep following the highway, X.”

With that said, Zero took off, abandoning the overpass for the city proper. Nothing bad could possibly happen to someone like Zero, so I did as told, following the highway towards HQ.

“I can’t believe that Commander Sigma would go Maverick… I just can’t!”

That chip contained evidence of Commander Sigma’s insurrection against humanity itself, and Hunters who pledged themselves to his cause followed him down that path. The rebellion extended past this city alone; its banners threatened to smother the whole world. This was a statement, declaring all humans and any Reploids who defied their rule would be crushed.

“There must be a mistake here, somewhere… There has to be.”

I muttered it to myself like a wish, fighting off Mechaniloids and Reploids blocking my path. Why must my fellow Reploids become Maverick? Why must we fight against each other?

None of my former comrades could offer an answer.

“Why… Why are you doing this….”

How many Reploids and Mechaniloids have I destroyed by now...

The remains of my fallen comrades filled my scope as more enemies advanced upon me. I aimed my buster, feeling an overwhelming sense of dread. Inhale… Exhale… Taking a deep breath, I steeled myself against my apprehensions. Body too tense, I didn’t have a second to relax when--

“Huh. Didn’t expect you to come back here alone.”

Before I could even react to the voice that boomed out behind me, an enormous figure engulfed my vision and slammed me hard into the ground.

“What’s the matter, X? Can’t even land a single hit on my Ride Armor?”

“Damnit! Fine, then. How about this!”

I unleashed all the energy in my buster on Vile. But he easily neutralized my attack with his own assault.

“No… No way!”

That shot took everything I had. That charge shot, my special technique and most powerful attack, had no effect on him whatsoever.

No, I shouldn’t think like that. Even if my attacks don’t work, I couldn’t afford to throw in the towel now!

“If I can’t take you out with just one hit, then I’ll keep firing until I beat you!”

When Vile had suddenly appeared, he trapped me with his Ride Armor. In order to escape, I targeted the road around me, firing off buster shots to break it up and loosen the grip on me enough to get free. From there, I immediately counterattacked, but he simply repelled all of my shots. Deciding that close combat put me at a disadvantage, I kept some distance from Vile and launched a constant barrage of charged shots. I knew that the continuous overuse of my buster would damage it with every shot, but I had no other option.

“This is it Vile. Either you get destroyed or my arm goes down trying!”

“My my… You sure are acting like some kinda brat pitching a fit, X. It’s about time I shut you up for good.”

Vile kept deflecting and even dodging my attacks. He slowly closed the distance between us, his voice just as cavalier as ever. If he drew just another step closer, I’d be in a position to get captured in his massive Ride Armor’s arms again. Suddenly, my entire body seized up, as if something constricted it tightly. I couldn’t move.

“Hyaaugh! W--What is this!?”

Glancing about, I saw what appeared to be a rope generated by some sort of electrical shock wrapped around my body. Only then did I notice the numerous metal discs on the ground surrounding where I’d been caught.

“Is this… An electromagnetic capture device!?”

Something like this was typically used against rampaging criminals, or for Mavericks who proved to be too difficult to handle. Only Maverick Hunters were allowed the use of such devices, but Vile had once been a Maverick Hunter himself. He must have taken it from storage at Hunter HQ at the time of the coup d’etat.

“You were so focused on me the whole time, you neglected your surroundings. A rookie mistake like that is how you got caught in a such a simple trap.”

If only I’d been paying attention, I would have noticed that Vile set this trap right under my nose. I struggled to break free, but as expected from a trap intended for Mavericks, I accomplished nothing. I stood no chance against a tool even Mavericks had trouble getting out of.

“You really are just a B-Class after all… What would Sigma want with a wimpy weakling like you anyway?”

I still couldn’t move, and found myself once again in the Ride Armor’s grasp. My joints began to creak as its grip tightened.

“You’ve only got one life, X. You should’ve been more careful with it..”

While he taunted me, that grip tightened further. The trap had already been enough, and the Ride Armor pushed it into overkill territory. After all I had heard and seen about Commander Sigma’s uprising, the weight of the reality finally started sinking in... The reality that Maverick Hunters had become the very things they hunted…

“I mean, I could tell you how fun it is to kill people, but I’m not sure you’d be convinced. Oh well, time to die, X.”

This is bad, this is bad, this is really bad. If things kept up like this, I’d be done for. I’ll die without achieving a thing! Caught in a force without mercy, my joints could only shriek, and my vision began to blur. I could hear it. I could feel it throughout my entire body. The sound of metal crunching echoed throughout my mind. The sound of metal being broken…

-- D E A T H --

When that word came to me--

“Do anything more to my friend, and I’ll blast your head clean off your shoulders, Vile.”

In a flash of red, what I saw was--

“Tch… So you finally caught up, you blond bastard.”

A Reploid with golden hair fluttering in the wind like a banner of hope as he aimed his buster. Zero.  

“The situation is… If I must be frank, pretty bad…”

“What’s pretty bad is the fact that you can call this disaster ‘pretty bad’...”

“Honestly, I still can’t believe it...”

After I stumbled into that encounter with Vile, Zero rushed in to save me once he realized what was happening. I lost consciousness soon after, but when I came to, I found myself at the “Special Machine Research Facility” underneath Maverick Hunter HQ. Vile had the advantage, but instead he boarded an airship that suddenly appeared, vanishing without doing anything more.

While I underwent repairs from the damage done by Vile’s assault, we discussed the next plan of action and what objectives we Maverick Hunters should take. Speaking of, it’s been a while since I’ve been here, hasn’t it?

“If this insurrection is truly happening, then the Hunters’ foundation will crumble.”

“I don’t want to believe it myself, but… as a scientist, I cannot deny what my eyes have seen. I must accept it. But something on this scale has never crossed my mind before…”

This came from the elderly scientist who personally tended to my repairs. With a mournful expression, he meticulously went about mending my parts. It was likely no one else in the entire world could mend a Reploid faster.

“This must be hitting you hard, Dr. Cain.”

Dr. Cain.

The man known as the world’s greatest scientist, and the one who laid the foundation for Reploid design. His work was so great, it’s been said that there isn’t a single person alive who doesn’t know him. Commander “Sigma”, the one leading the insurrection, was said to be his greatest masterpiece.

Commander Sigma had set a shining example in his day-to-day leadership of the Maverick Hunters. As a Reploid, I had the utmost respect for him, so I still couldn’t believe he’d gone Maverick…

No. I just didn’t want to believe it. Because if I did, something inside me would shatter. But, saying that, I just couldn’t leave it alone.

The truth was, I’d fought with Vile, and seen with my very own eyes countless civilian Reploids slaughtered by those who’d gone Maverick. And Commander Sigma--no, Sigma, declared war against the world.

I’d seen the footage too. There was no doubt: Sigma had gone Maverick.

“Exterminating all humans to create a world just for Reploids… It’s delusional.”

I bit my lip at Zero’s words. If it became a world of only Reploids, what would be left?

“Certainly, you Reploids have strength and tenacity that surpass that of humans… but because of that, we must live in harmony. No life is worth more or less than another. That was what I always wanted to convey… but there’s no doubt that Sigma would reject that.”

The man before me was probably the one suffering the most in this situation. He was the father of Reploid technology, and it was his greatest masterpiece that just declared war on society. Now, he would be subject to the harsh criticism of society.

“I don’t know what kind of world Sigma’s picturing in his mind,” Zero said evenly, leaning against the wall nearby with his arms folded, “but if he’s gone Maverick, then we have to take him down. That’s our job as Maverick Hunters, X.”

Always calm and unwaveringly decisive. That was Zero for you.

“I know, Zero… Our power is meant to protect. If someone threatens the peace of the world, even if it’s Commander--no. Even if it’s Sigma, I’ll fight.”

I clenched my barely functioning left hand, confirming the power that was there. This power I’d been given to fight with… it was meant to protect. It was not something to be aimed at people. And right now… I should use this power for the troubled, elderly man next to us.

“As long as you understand.”

As if he felt the determination in my heart, Zero left those parting words and exited the room.

That’s right. Now was not the time to be lost. Even now, Sigma’s band of Mavericks were threatening peace. Having to fight my friends and fellow Reploids will be painful, but there are things in this world that I must protect.

“Because I’m a Maverick Hunter,” I said, as if I needed to hear those words once more for myself.

[itsjust-lin]

3,18,30!!!

3.Top 10 Songs?

Flower

Eschatologist

Emotion

Monologue

Sunshine

TOP DOG

Annie

The Beat

Follow me/Say it

Arario

18. What do you like the most about each member?

P-Goon - he’s really kind and supportive, also his looks are quite unique (only person similar to him I’ve seen was SHINEE Jonghyun). He’s a leader but he doesn’t act like he’s the most important person in group and must be always in center of attention. Sangdo - idk if only I have it but when I look at him, no matter what he does, he looks so naturally adorable and I love it. Big voice talent, I could listen to him singing for hours. Also I have the feeling like he’s the mama of group, never fighting with anyone and keeping kids not arguing too much with each other. That’s cute.Nakta - so innocent and quiet but with so much talent. I’m happy that he found his way in DJing, I hope he will use some of that in next ToppDogg comebacks. BRING BACK BLONDE HAIR.Hansol - he’s really a walking mistery. Too pure for this world but I love his “softness”. And dance.  Scissorhands dance video on repeat 25/8 . I appreciate his art too. And that he’s true about himself.B-Joo - THIS.BOY.CAN.DANCE.SO.GOOD.+ HIS.FACE.EXPRESSIONS.WHEN.HE.DANCE (do I have to say more, really) And his voice seems so different for me, I FREAKING LOVE IT, I need more of him singing pleaseeee.Beautiful smile which makes me melt. Always so happy and full of energy, I need to learn that from him somehow. He’s the only person in the world who could scream constantly next to me and I won’t kill him. Hojoon - His version of “Love yourself” took my heart. As much as I hated this song I started to love. This soft voice should definitely get more attention. He’s a person that is hard for me to “get”, like I’m not really sure how I see him, what kind of person he is and well, I think I like itXero - his dorkness is cute and fun at the same time. I like the way he dance. For some reason I used to think at the beginning that he’s too selfish and always look mad but I was wrong and now I really like his cool attitude.A-Tom - I’m really happy that he got a bit more in the spotlight now cause he deserve it. He sounds different than other rap artists, at least for me. He’s also too adorable. I identify with him when he laughs and falls from the chair.Yano -  for me Yano is a brilliant rapper and very determined person. I remember boys said in some interview that he was taking final exams again just to get at university and if I was him I would probably give up so I wanna be like him.30. Rank the dance line in terms of favorite dancing style!1. B-Joo (oh, surprise)2. Xero3. Hansol4. HojoonOMG I made that so long, sorry ^.^ Thank you so much for those, ILU ♥ToppDogg asks

[k2kid]

Soldiers letters do not stand on their own. They impart small, discrete, often obscure, snippets of information that connect the writer with the people of his hometown, unit, and his social circle. They can often give clues that lead to a broader understanding of the writer and his experiences during his service. The letters also give the reader an insight into the activities of other soldiers, usually acquaintances, friends, and families This would particularly be the case for soldiers that grew up and enlisted in the rural areas of Canada, such as Bruce County.

Private Joseph Edgar McAfee, regimental number 651738[i] was from Glamis, Ontario, 15 kilometers from Paisely, Ontario. The Paisley Advocate covered the news locally and published, at least, two articles relating to the McAfee family. On October 16, 1918 it published a letter from this soldier to his mother where he relates the circumstances of his wounding.

Letters from the Soldiers

IN HOSPITAL IN WALES

Mrs. H. McAfee of Greenock, received the following letter recently from her son, Pte. Edgar McAfee:

Dear Folks–

Just a few lines to let you know of my whereabouts, and hoping you are fine and everything O.K. as it leaves me at present. This is the fourth hospital I have been in since I was wounded. Thinks this place is on the coast of the Irish Sea. What I have seen of the country appears to be very pretty.

Did you get the letter I wrote from the hospital in France? I was sorry I did not get to the hospital Bertha was in, but maybe I will get a chance again. I was sound asleep a week ago to-night about 12 o’clock when the nurse came and said, “Hi Canada, do you want to go to Blighty?” Imagine my surprise, as I thought I would be going back up the line in a day or two. So we took the train down to a seaport on the English Channel, got on the boat from there and came up through Chatham and the outskirts of London to a hospital in Cardiff city, stayed there in bed till yesterday and then came down here. I like this place fine. I am up now and able to get around well only I cannot wear my boot on my left foot yet. We get good rations here, lots of sleep and a free concert in the hospital every few nights given by the local town. And a couple of days ago a woman came around and gave me a kit from the Canadian Red Cross Society, consisting of writing material, shaving outfit and teeth cleaning powder.

The worst of is I will likely have to go back to the reserve at Witley, but its is a good rest anyway. I haven’t heard anything about the fellows around home fared out. N. McDermid got wounded in the leg.

Did I tell you how I got hit? Don’t believe I did. Well, every time we go in the line there are always so many left out of the machine gun courses, etc., and if they are going into battle these men have to act as stretcher-bearers. Well I was left out of the trip to the battle in front of Arras, but followed up and took in wounded. Everything went along O.K., was on the go practically all day and night. The second day I, along with three other chaps, was scouting over the previous day’s battle ground for any wounded, and there was a bunch of reinforcements passing us going into action, and all of an instant a German aeroplane swooped dow[n] and fired on us with a machine gun. I heard the bullets swish down and felt my toe sting, so beat it back and put my field dressing on, then went back to the ambulance and it was not time till I was miles away from the din of battle.

Our platoon sergeant was hit in the same way on the Amiens front, only he was in a trench. Let me know in your next letter if Jack Dobson is still living. I helped to carry him out of a shell hole. A dud shell had struck one of his legs. A dud is a defective shell that does not explode.

I have a few German souvenirs to send home. They are not much, but would be nice to keep.

Have you lots of wood cut for the winter? It’s one thing [for] certain, the war won’t last any more than a year, but I expect there will be a lot of hard fighting yet. It sure has been swaying our way lately. The German soldiers are getting very disheartened. If there had been lots of fight in them they sure would have got me in the Amiens battle.

Think that is all for now.

Paisley Advocate. October 16, 1918. Contributed by Jim Kelly.

Above: Paisley Advocate. October 16, 1918. Contributed by Jim Kelly.

The letter is full of details relating to the experience of McAfee’s wounding and from an examination of his service records we can correlate the events and people to which he relates with dates and locations.

Having enlisted with the 160th Bruce Battalion at Tiverton, Ontario on February 11, 1916, McAfee stayed with this battalion until it was used for reinforcing battalions in active service on the continent. Having arrived in England on October 17, 1916, it was not until March 28, 1918 that McAfee started his assignment with the 18th when he was shipped to France and passing through the Canadian Infantry Base Depot at Etaples to the Canadian Corps Reinforcement Camp he joined the 18th Battalion “in the field” on April 13, 1918.

The area of Telegraph Hill. It is due south of Tilloy-les-Mofflaines and half way distant to Neuville-Vitasse.

The activities of the Battalion had been terribly busy during the latter part of August 1918. It was operating at Telegraph Hill, south-east of Arras and the War Diary relates in some detail the activities on August 26, 1918.[ii] An attack began at 3:00 AM that day which met with mixed success, resulting in 10 men killed in action with 15 wounded.

The following day was not as active but resulted in 15 men killed with 150 wounded. The 4th Canadian Infantry Brigade (4th CIB) compresses their War Diary for the 3 days of August 26 to 28, 1918 into one brief entry, with the telling statement, “Starting at Zero hour followed a period of prolonged and most bitter fighting for three days, which continued until the Brigade was relieved…”[iii] This entry gives some idea of the tenor of the combat the units of the Brigade was experiencing. The War Diary states that from August 26 to 31, 1918, the total casualties incurred by the Brigade were 11 officers and 146 ranks killed and 50 offices and 999 other ranks wounded.[iv]

On August 27, 1918 McAfee is wounded. As he went over the rear area of the battlefield he is attacked by a German Air Force fighter. He offers specific details showing how the German Air Force was used tactically to interdict troops on the ground. It was, perhaps, attracted by the large group of reinforcements moving up into action on the line and McAfee becomes a victim of its efforts to kill and wound the troops on the ground. It succeeded in wounding Private McAfee’s left foot hitting, luckily, the flesh and not the bone. The 4th CIB War Diary expressly relates on how the use of enemy aircraft was used to interdict the ground forces at this time stating, “The enemy aircraft [was] active at times, and hindered the advance or our Supports by Machine Gun fire and the use of light bombs.”[v]

This wound begins the process of casualty evacuation beginning with McAfee putting, “…my field dressing on, then went back to the ambulance and it was not time till I was miles away from the din of battle.” His initial medical treatment occurred at the 4th Canadian Field Ambulance. From there he is transferred on August 28, 1918, to No. 18 General Hospital, Camiers, France, and by the August 31, 1918, he is being treated at the 3rd Western General Hospital at Cardiff, Wales. On September 27, 1918, he is transferred to Woodcote Park Military Convalescent Hospital at Epsom.[vi]

He relates some of the details of his treatment and care and expresses that, “The worst of is I will likely have to go back to the reserve at Witley, but its is a good rest anyway.” Witley Camp was used for reconstituting and the convalescence of soldiers in preparation of a return to fighting. This camp had an organization that assessed the medical status of a soldier and, depending on the severity or nature of the wound or illness, a soldier’s classification may result in a return to Canada for discharge. From McAfee’s tone it sounds like he wants to return to active service.

His letter relates some of the news of the soldiers he served with. Private Neil McDermid[vii] was also from Glamis, Ontario and had enlisted with the 160th Battalion and enlisted in March 1916. They were both the same age at the time of enlistment (21-years) so they probably knew each other well. He was wounded on the same day as McAfee, suffering a gunshot wound to the right leg and hand. Though McDermid would survive the war and be discharged on May 31, 1919, he died of heart failure on September 8, 1919 at the age of 25-years.

Above: Farm Record Card of death of McDermid and news clipping about his death. Source: Walkerton Telepscope. September 18, 1919. Contributed by Jim Kelly.

He also mentions John (Jack) Dobson[viii]. This soldier was also wounded August 26, 1918, in unusual circumstances. It appears he was hit by an unexploded shell, which shattered his leg. Dobson apparently effected his own amputation in the field, and it is not clear if this occurred before or after McAfee rendered aid to his comrade. Dobson, also, was a member of the 160th Battalion. He had enlisted in January 1916 at Chesley, Ontario. He was 25-years old at enlistment, but these men may have served in the same company or platoon and became familiar with each other.

Above: Photograph of Dobson, John: Service no. 651436 (Military Medal) and clipping relating to his wounding. Source: Hopkins, J. (1919). Canada at War: A Record of Heroism and Achievement 1914-1918. 1st ed. Toronto: The Canadian Annual Review Limited, p.386.

One wonders what McAfee felt when he found his comrade with his shattered leg, harmed by the passage of a large, heavy, rapidly moving projectile, and not from the effects of an explosion. This type of wounding may have been rare, but not unheard of.

McAfee ends the letter relating that he has a “few German souvenirs” and that, in his estimation, the collection does not amount to much. Given the letter is written in the fall, he is looking to winter and wonders after how the wood supply is like at his home. Finishing off with a prediction of the outcome of the war, he reflects that is the German army had higher morale he would not have survived combat, a bit of an unusual correlation to make, but perhaps a bit of reassurance and bravado to buck up the spirits of his parents to offset the news of his wounding.

This letter gives details that reinforce the idea of community and connection. All three men in the letter, the author and the men mentioned, were from the same area of Bruce County and had been further connect by their initial service and training with the 160th Battalion. Their connection extended into active service together with the 18th Battalion CEF in France. Their connection was further cemented by their wounding occurring close at had on August 26 for Dobson and August 27 for McDermid and McAfee. They were connected by three distinct characteristics and with McDermid and McAfee being from the same rural town their connection was probably closer, perhaps friends. Regrettably, McAfee’s letter does not give any intimation or details as to the nature of his relationship with McDermid.

The letter illustrates the speed and efficiency of the Imperial medical services with McAfee in England approximately 4-days after his wounding. It also illustrates the secondary support of organizations, such as the Red Cross, with it giving him items of comfort and value so he can be comfortable and communicate with his family and friends.

Even after his and his comrades wounding, McAfee is eager to go back and fight again, apparently afraid of the delay a visit to Witley Camp would cause. As he notes at the end of the letter, “It’s one thing [for] certain, the war won’t last any more than a year, but I expect there will be a lot of hard fighting yet.” He may be worried he will not make back into the line to assist his comrades when they are wounded or as a combat soldier.

The McAfee family, however, must have been highly relieved. The had already lost one son, their eldest, Private John McAfee, was killed in action at Hill 70 on August 15, 1917 while serving with the 2nd Canadian Machine Gun Company. Having lost one son to the war, they must have been thankful to hear such news from their other son. McAfee’s letter gives them the information they need to be reassured and gives us a glance at the life and experience of one man from a small town in Ontario.

[i] Library and Archives Canada. RG 150, Accession 1992-93/166, Box 6562 – 43. Item Number:143532.Accessed August 15, 2020.

[ii] August 26, 1918 18th Battalion War Diary Entry: At 3:00 a.m. following intense 5 min. barrage Bn. jumped off TILOY [sic] TRENCH in front of TELEGRAPH HILL in support of 21st Cdn. Bn. The artillery preparation was good. Owing to getting lost in the darkness, the tanks detailed to go over with the Bn. failed to turn up per schedule, so the Unit was without their assistance in the initial kick-off.MINORCA TRENCH, a difficult nut to crack, was set as the first objective, and SOUTHERN AVENUE TRENCH as the second objective. Both positions were won by 8.00 a.m. “D” Coy. holding the last named defence line in conjunction with the 21st Cdn. Bn. “A” Coy. remained in GORDON TRENCH, and “B” Coy at the first objective, MINORCA TRENCH.

Up to this time the casualties had been far smaller than anticipated, although Lieut. McHardy had gone only a short distance from the Assault trench when he sustained mortal shrapnel wounds.

The German resistance had been slight but at this point was considerably strengthened. At 1. o’clock, the Bn. was ordered to capture the village of GUIMAPPE. Personal reconnaissances in broad daylight and under sever fire by Major C.M.R. Graham and Capt. D.A.G. Parsons, M.C., O.Cs respectively for “D” and “C” Coys. were first conducted. Waiting until artillery support, inadequate as it was to meet the situation, had been obtained, “C” & “D” Coys at 4.00 p.m. advanced and captured the ruined town. Casualties in the face of both terrific machine gun and artillery barrages laid down by the enemy were fairly heavy.

Lieut. Brackin [sic], who had done brilliant work up to this moment, was instantly killed by a shell and Capt. Parsons and Lieut. Edwards sustained wounds that resulted in their immediate evacuation.

Resultant of the progress, “C” and “D” Coys occupied and consolidated STAG TRENCH, and “A” and “B” Coys moved forward to RAKE AND GORDON TRENCHES respectively. At. 11 p.m. “A” Coy under the fine leadership of Lieut. Spence, went forward, despite most stubborn opposition, and captured CALVARY TRENCH. Unfortunately, the achievement went for naught, as the Unit on their immediate left was held up and the Coy. at 3.00 a.m., 27th, after 4 hours of desperate fighting was compelled to withdraw temporarily to RAKE TRENCH. Approx. all ranks 10 killed & 15 wounded. 1 O.R. ret. from leave & 1 O.R. on leave. 2 O.Rs ret. from army rest camp.

[iii] 4th Canadian Infantry Brigade’ diary entry for August 1918 War Diary, p. 15.

[iv] 4th Canadian Infantry Brigade’ diary entry for August 1918 War Diary, p. 16.

[v] 4th Canadian Infantry Brigade’ diary entry for August 1918 Appendix 31, p. 5.

[vi] McAfee must have written the letter before his transfer to Epsom, though, but the time of its publishing, he was in Epsom, south of London, England.

[vii] Library and Archives Canada. RG 150, Accession 1992-93/166, Box 6690 – 30. Item Number: 143206.

[viii] Library and Archives Canada. RG 150, Accession 1992-93/166, Box 2553 – 36. Item Number: 357483.

Soldiers letters do not stand on their own. They impart small, discrete, often obscure, snippets of information that connect the writer with the people of his hometown, unit, and his social circle.

[torentialtribute]

Konta’s attention to detail is why she is on a journey to win Wimbledon

There are reasons why Jo Konta enters this Wimbledon as Britain's only top 100 ranked female player, let alone the only one who has made the seedings.

A lot of it is down to a relentless worth of ethic and attention to detail, and we get onto the latter subject when discussing the merits of traveling by Tube.

Konta, who lives in south London would like to use more and took a couple of journeys in April, but has reservations about this mode of transport. It transpires this has nothing to do with fear of being hassled or recognized, but worry that it might be jeopardize the training or preparation.

Jo Konta is determined to go and win Wimbledon this year as Britain's only top 100 player

The British No. 1 has a relentless work ethic and wants to win her maiden Grand Slam at SW19

'The reason I avoid it most of the time is that times when I'm at home it's usually in pre-season in the winter or during the summer, when I can't afford to get sick because I'm playing either tournaments or because I'm training intensely, my body is taking a beating and my immune system is low, "she says.

'So if I don't use it because it is a bit of a germ box and you can easily pick something up. Also I took my dog ​​on it and it turns out he is not a very good traveler and did not enjoy it, so that was all a bit stressful. "

Konta is in a lounge at the All England Club that looks across at the Center Court, where this fortnight she will be the renewed focus of attention after the dramatic upturn in the form that this Spring saw her reach the final of the Italian Open and the semi-final of the French Open.

She is, by a long distance, the best domestic hope in the women's singles, and it was on that same arena that she reached the second of the three Grand Slam semis before being stopped by Venus Williams. The draw this year has promise, although the immediate grass form has been middling, not scintillating.

There is an element of the tortoise and hers in how she has got to this position, having tasks a long journey across continents to get here without being flagged up as a serious prospect. Now 28, it is half a lifetime ago that she landed in the UK, but only four years since she started to suggest that she might be a player of the highest caliber.

SHE'S GOT THE GAME, IT'S ALL ABOUT CONSISTENCY NOW

EXCLUSIVE BY JOHN LLOYD : Jo Konta wildly surpassed my expectations at the French Open, but she choked when she got to the semis.

She had a huge chance and let it slip – it's not a crime, it can happen – but I would be concerned about that frailty which showed itself when she got into a winning position.

It is possible to conquer that, as players have done in the past, but for me that would be the difference between getting beyond the semi-finals of a Slam.

Her game could have a little more variety, as she tends to be a little bit predictable at times. But the serve is good, I don't see any problems with it.

The ground strokes are fabulous, she's got a lot of power in both wings and takes the ball on. The return in Paris was particularly impressive.

It is all about consistency, I don't know why she has gone off the bush a bit on grass, but I am not sure it's that much of a bad thing to have gone out early in Eastbourne and had a few days off.

The game is there. She really is ready game-wise. But she did not hesitate when the time comes.

At the time she started to make her move up the rankings there was more British hope invested in the likes of Laura Robson and Heather Watson. That reckoned without the truism that the ability to consistently apply oneself is a huge skill of its own, and it turns out that she has this in a quantity comparable to that of Andy Murray.

Not all comparisons with the Scot are, however, accurate.

"I've never considered the next big thing through my whole career so I was never paid that child or attention since I was little," she says.

'So I never really had to deal with that sort of assumption, I had my own challenges in trying to find the player and the person I am and how to deal with it. It's not something I resent (being under-rated) it's just how it was.

'I play for myself and the enjoyment the game gives me, that wasn't always the case or that easy because when you are younger it's a lot harder to play for yourself. You play for your parents, or for sacrifices that have been made on your behalf.

"For sure I had to go through my own self-discovery in finding the real reasons that I played and enjoyment of it. I can now say that I don't play for other people's opinions or to justify myself or for the status. "

The trigger for Konta was meeting up with Spanish coach Esteban Carill and sports psychologist Juan Coto. The latter tragically took his own life in late 2016, but his influence on her lives on.

"The biggest impact on me was Esteban and Juan who gave me the tools to figure things out and discover myself," says Konta. "It was in that period that I definitely felt I was becoming my own person and individual and self-sufficient and playing for myself. It was late 2014, the beginning of 2015 working with themes that I just started to put in consistent days of good habits, nurturing that perspective. I've had to re-align myself since at times but that was the period I found the good path. "

As is the case with many successful tennis players, it was the parents who made the aforementioned sacrifices to afford her the necessary opportunities.

When they arrived in the UK her father, Gabor, took a job at a hotel near the Excel Arena in East London, and the love of music was partly kindled by the buzz around the acts who used to stay there. The mother Gabriella had an easily transferable skill from their roots in Sydney, working as a dentist.

She gets her work ethic from both as well as the athletic gene. The maternal grandfather, Kersetz Tamas, played two games for the great Hungarian side of the fifties alongside Ferenc Puskas while the father was also an accomplished footballer.

"Part of it is nature and part nurture. My Dad is an absolute workhorse, the work ethic he has and hours he puts in, he works in hospitality and it's a brutal job the hours you have to put in. There were periods of him working late, doing overnight nights, he has always worked long hours. My mum as well is very dedicated to her job, which is very demanding.

"When I was young I would go running with my Dad, I used to train with him. On Sundays he used to play football for an Austrian club in Sydney and I would go on my bike with him while he was playing football, and he had a good ice hockey player. Sadly I never got to meet my Mum's Dad just died before I was born. "

The first tennis experiences were not of Wimbledon, but the pre-Australian Open event at White City in Sydney.

'I remember going there about seven or eight with my Mum and getting Lindsay Davenport's autograph. I did not have an understanding of Wimbledon and that has been quite the education because I fully grasp the weight of Wimbledon – special does not really do it justice.

[1945923]

Perhaps oddly, her most vivid Wimbledon memory is not the run to the semi-finals but the eventful debut as a little known wildcard in the main draw back in 2012.

'I played Christina McHale and lost 10-8 in the third set after it had stopped for bad light in the third set the night before. It was the first time I had played a match over two days.

THREE GAMES NOT TO MISS IN ROUND ONE

Venus Williams v Cori Gauff

On Friday, Cori Gauff became the youngest player to qualify for the main Wimbledon draw since the Open era ground in 1968.

While she said she would love to share the court with her idol Serena Williams, it's pretty certain she will be thrilled by facing her sister Venus instead.

Ana Bogdan v Johanna Konta

She came so close to the French Open when reaching the semi-finals, so Britain will be hoping Johanna Konta can go one better here by making the final.

She reached the semis at SW19 two years ago and should start well against Romanian Ana Bogdan.

Harriet Dart v Christina McHale

Having tasks from a set of seventh seed Karolina Pliskova on her Wimbledon debut last year and reaching the semi-finals of the mixed doubles, big things are expected or 22-year-old Briton Harriet Dart. Certainly one to keep an eye on.

"I remember it was my most tiring Wimbledon, I played doubles and mixed and the whole experience, the emotion and the excitement, meant that I was absolutely exhausted at the end."

Should she get another run this year then what happened two years ago – when she beat Simona Halep under the roof in the quarter finals before losing to Williams – will be of inestimable value.

It will also help that she can return every night to the house she shares with her boyfriend and dachshund, Bono.

'That experience of 2017 was probably the best I have ever managed everything, there is nothing I would change about it. After that tournament I didn't feel drained, it was only later on that I definitely had residual fatigue (she went into a prolonged form slump later in the season), but immediately afterwards I actually felt fine.

' The more times I make it to the second week of Grand Slams can only be good, it doesn't matter how many times you can do it. I sometimes wonder if Roger and Rafa get almost bored with it, they have done it that often, but for me it never becomes less special.

'This time at Wimbledon I get home to my dog ​​and I' m really looking forward to that. I get to close the door and be at home, very few players get to sleep in their own bed and play a Grand Slam at the same time. "

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[winniegist]

Discharging Student Loans in Bankruptcy

We all know college is expensive. But just how hard is it to pay off student loans? According to new information published by the National Bureau of Economic Research (NBER), choosing the right school to attend can have a huge effect on your future — but not just on what type of job you might be more likely to get with a fancier college on your resume. It might impact your ability to pay off student loans. This topic is important to bankruptcy lawyers because if you ever get behind on payments…. well, read on.

Sure, picking a $40,000-per-year-tuition college over one that’s half the price should be a serious topic around the dinner table when you’re a high school student. How many grants or scholarships are you eligible and applying for? How big of a loan will you need to get to cover the rest? And how will you pay it all back?

The Treasury Department staffers who authored the working paper for NBER found that low- and middle-income college borrowers struggle with loan burdens after leaving school by matching tax data with information in the Department of Education’s Student Loan Data System. Most low-income borrowers haven’t touched repaying any of the original balance of their student loans five years after college, while a borrower from a high-income family has repaid about 19%.

This is because the employment outcomes for students from low-income families aren’t as fruitful. More than 1 in 10 students from families earning fewer than $30,000 per year are unemployed five years after leaving school, while another 36% are working but earning fewer than $25,000. Meanwhile, only 27% of students from families earning $75,000 to $100,000 are earning fewer than $25,000, while 8% are unemployed.

Additionally, about 1 in 4 borrowers from low-income families default on student loans within five years of entering repayment.

Why the difference?

According to the data gathered for NBER, students from low-income families face tougher challenges with student loans based on their lack of access to wealth. Often, the balance of their loans is larger than when they originally took them out, five years after graduating. Wealthier borrowers also rely less heavily on student debt to finance college, according to left-leaning think tank Demos.

However, the NBER paper suggests that when low-income borrowers attend less selective schools that are still in the middle of the road in terms of economic mobility, about half end up earning more than $25,000 a year after entering repayment.

It’s important to note that the data was collected for student loans in repayment between 2004 and 2009, the tail end of that being right around the time of the economic collapse.

According to the Equality of Opportunity Project, schools that ranked best for upward mobility for low-income borrowers were:

Cal State-Los Angeles

SUNY-Stony Brook

CUNY System

Glendale Community College

University of Texas at El Paso

The percent of students who come from families in the bottom fifth but reach the top fifth of income distribution are included in the analysis by the Equality of Opportunity Project. Cal State-Los Angeles has the best mobility rate at nearly 10% of students achieving that tier, while the average college in the U.S. only churns out 1.9% of graduates who dramatically increase their wealth.

So, which college is right for me?

You’ll need to weigh a lot of factors when choosing which college is right for you: programs offered, acceptance rate, location, price, and more. If economic mobility is important to you, it’s good to have the data behind trends seen in colleges today.

The colleges reporting the lowest median parent income on the list include schools in New York, Texas, Kansas, New Mexico, and Florida. Of the lowest set of parent median incomes, the best child (individual) median income was reported from graduates of Vaughn College of Aeronautics and Technology in New York, where graduates ages 32-34 are earning $53,000 per year compared to their parents’ $30,900 per year.

No goal of becoming a pilot or engineer? That’s OK. If you go to University of Texas, most campuses will show results of a higher child income than parents’ income — many of which also tend to be in just the $30,000 range.

At City College of New York, you’ll earn $48,500 per year compared to your parents’ $35,500. At Cal State-Los Angeles, you’ll earn $43,000 for your parents’ $36,600.

Meanwhile, some schools aren’t the best choices, economically. Beauty schools, like Paul Mitchell in Costa Mesa, California — the lowest child median income on the list at $10,300 per year compared to their parents’ $85,200 per year — and some technical and community colleges can affect upward mobility rankings. However, students earning two-year degrees at public colleges, in addition to four-year ones, generally have an easier time paying off student loans. Community college also can help students save a lot of money by earning general credits they’d pay big bucks in tuition for per credit hour at a four-year school.

For students, both child and parent, who never attended college, they’re making just $11,500 per year on their parents’ $35,200.

Interested in what school results in the highest median income for students? It’s Saint Louis College of Pharmacy in St. Louis, Missouri. The median child income is $123,600 — but that’s also coming from a parent median income of $92,500.

What’s the best plan for paying off student loans?

Student loan debt can be tough. It’s important to explore all college payment options when also considering adding student loan debt, and when you’re able to start repaying your debt, you should begin doing so immediately.

It’s also important to know that if you’re feeling crippled by student loan debt years after college, you have options. However, the law makes bankruptcy only an option in discharging student loan debt if you can show undue hardship. If you can satisfy each of these requirements, you may be able to discharge student loan debt:

Based on your current income and expenses, you’re unable to maintain a minimal standard of living for yourself and your dependents if you’re forced to pay off your student loans.

You have additional circumstances that indicate that this state of affairs most likely will continue during most of your repayment period.

You have made good faith efforts to repay your loans.

Erasing Student Loans in a Utah Bankruptcy

Student loans are considered to be in the lowest category of general unsecured debt when you’re looking at bankruptcy, which includes credit card and medical debt. It’s incredibly difficult to get a discharge on student loan debt, even though a growing number of influencers in consumer bankruptcy think that it should be dischargeable. Right now, our office will only file a motion to have student loan debt discharged is if you are permanently disabled and will never earn sufficient income in your lifetime to pay it back.  Even then, there is no guarantee we can do it.  The best route, however, would be to research all your financing options fully before choosing a college, possibly pursuing a degree that may land you a job that allows for loan forgiveness, like being a public school teacher or a nurse, and getting on a repayment plan after you graduate and sticking to it.

Free Consultation with Bankruptcy Lawyer

If you have a bankruptcy question, or need to file a bankruptcy case, call Ascent Law now at (801) 676-5506. Attorneys in our office have filed over a thousand cases. We can help you now. Come in or call in for your free initial consultation.

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Source: http://www.ascentlawfirm.com/discharging-student-loans-in-bankruptcy/

[aretia]

Discharging Student Loans in Bankruptcy

We all know college is expensive. But just how hard is it to pay off student loans? According to new information published by the National Bureau of Economic Research (NBER), choosing the right school to attend can have a huge effect on your future — but not just on what type of job you might be more likely to get with a fancier college on your resume. It might impact your ability to pay off student loans. This topic is important to bankruptcy lawyers because if you ever get behind on payments…. well, read on.

Sure, picking a $40,000-per-year-tuition college over one that’s half the price should be a serious topic around the dinner table when you’re a high school student. How many grants or scholarships are you eligible and applying for? How big of a loan will you need to get to cover the rest? And how will you pay it all back?

The Treasury Department staffers who authored the working paper for NBER found that low- and middle-income college borrowers struggle with loan burdens after leaving school by matching tax data with information in the Department of Education’s Student Loan Data System. Most low-income borrowers haven’t touched repaying any of the original balance of their student loans five years after college, while a borrower from a high-income family has repaid about 19%.

This is because the employment outcomes for students from low-income families aren’t as fruitful. More than 1 in 10 students from families earning fewer than $30,000 per year are unemployed five years after leaving school, while another 36% are working but earning fewer than $25,000. Meanwhile, only 27% of students from families earning $75,000 to $100,000 are earning fewer than $25,000, while 8% are unemployed.

Additionally, about 1 in 4 borrowers from low-income families default on student loans within five years of entering repayment.

Why the difference?

According to the data gathered for NBER, students from low-income families face tougher challenges with student loans based on their lack of access to wealth. Often, the balance of their loans is larger than when they originally took them out, five years after graduating. Wealthier borrowers also rely less heavily on student debt to finance college, according to left-leaning think tank Demos.

However, the NBER paper suggests that when low-income borrowers attend less selective schools that are still in the middle of the road in terms of economic mobility, about half end up earning more than $25,000 a year after entering repayment.

It’s important to note that the data was collected for student loans in repayment between 2004 and 2009, the tail end of that being right around the time of the economic collapse.

According to the Equality of Opportunity Project, schools that ranked best for upward mobility for low-income borrowers were:

Cal State-Los Angeles

SUNY-Stony Brook

CUNY System

Glendale Community College

University of Texas at El Paso

The percent of students who come from families in the bottom fifth but reach the top fifth of income distribution are included in the analysis by the Equality of Opportunity Project. Cal State-Los Angeles has the best mobility rate at nearly 10% of students achieving that tier, while the average college in the U.S. only churns out 1.9% of graduates who dramatically increase their wealth.

So, which college is right for me?

You’ll need to weigh a lot of factors when choosing which college is right for you: programs offered, acceptance rate, location, price, and more. If economic mobility is important to you, it’s good to have the data behind trends seen in colleges today.

The colleges reporting the lowest median parent income on the list include schools in New York, Texas, Kansas, New Mexico, and Florida. Of the lowest set of parent median incomes, the best child (individual) median income was reported from graduates of Vaughn College of Aeronautics and Technology in New York, where graduates ages 32-34 are earning $53,000 per year compared to their parents’ $30,900 per year.

No goal of becoming a pilot or engineer? That’s OK. If you go to University of Texas, most campuses will show results of a higher child income than parents’ income — many of which also tend to be in just the $30,000 range.

At City College of New York, you’ll earn $48,500 per year compared to your parents’ $35,500. At Cal State-Los Angeles, you’ll earn $43,000 for your parents’ $36,600.

Meanwhile, some schools aren’t the best choices, economically. Beauty schools, like Paul Mitchell in Costa Mesa, California — the lowest child median income on the list at $10,300 per year compared to their parents’ $85,200 per year — and some technical and community colleges can affect upward mobility rankings. However, students earning two-year degrees at public colleges, in addition to four-year ones, generally have an easier time paying off student loans. Community college also can help students save a lot of money by earning general credits they’d pay big bucks in tuition for per credit hour at a four-year school.

For students, both child and parent, who never attended college, they’re making just $11,500 per year on their parents’ $35,200.

Interested in what school results in the highest median income for students? It’s Saint Louis College of Pharmacy in St. Louis, Missouri. The median child income is $123,600 — but that’s also coming from a parent median income of $92,500.

What’s the best plan for paying off student loans?

Student loan debt can be tough. It’s important to explore all college payment options when also considering adding student loan debt, and when you’re able to start repaying your debt, you should begin doing so immediately.

It’s also important to know that if you’re feeling crippled by student loan debt years after college, you have options. However, the law makes bankruptcy only an option in discharging student loan debt if you can show undue hardship. If you can satisfy each of these requirements, you may be able to discharge student loan debt:

Based on your current income and expenses, you’re unable to maintain a minimal standard of living for yourself and your dependents if you’re forced to pay off your student loans.

You have additional circumstances that indicate that this state of affairs most likely will continue during most of your repayment period.

You have made good faith efforts to repay your loans.

Erasing Student Loans in a Utah Bankruptcy

Student loans are considered to be in the lowest category of general unsecured debt when you’re looking at bankruptcy, which includes credit card and medical debt. It’s incredibly difficult to get a discharge on student loan debt, even though a growing number of influencers in consumer bankruptcy think that it should be dischargeable. Right now, our office will only file a motion to have student loan debt discharged is if you are permanently disabled and will never earn sufficient income in your lifetime to pay it back.  Even then, there is no guarantee we can do it.  The best route, however, would be to research all your financing options fully before choosing a college, possibly pursuing a degree that may land you a job that allows for loan forgiveness, like being a public school teacher or a nurse, and getting on a repayment plan after you graduate and sticking to it.

Free Consultation with Bankruptcy Lawyer

If you have a bankruptcy question, or need to file a bankruptcy case, call Ascent Law now at (801) 676-5506. Attorneys in our office have filed over a thousand cases. We can help you now. Come in or call in for your free initial consultation.

Ascent Law LLC8833 S. Redwood Road, Suite CWest Jordan, Utah 84088 United StatesTelephone: (801) 676-5506

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Source: http://www.ascentlawfirm.com/discharging-student-loans-in-bankruptcy/