#it's almost the same as when I waste time playing video games in the first place

[nouearth]

a sticky situation.

peter parker x male reader.

summary: peter has a major crush on his roommate: you. everything unravels when he walks in on you changing.

wc: 4.1k. genre: smut. warnings: holland!peter, sub!top peter, voyeur!peter, college!au, dry-humping, grinding, frotting, handjobs, kissing, peter's first time, dubcon, cumplay, peter and reader are shooters, characters are aged up!

a bite of the cold air shuddered your damp and nude body once you stepped out of the bathroom, cataloguing the tidiness of your shared bedroom after. your shoulders tensed when the heated air and cold draft clashed for an estate of your body. but by the way your muscles eased into the green towel around your waist, you’ve figured which side won the war. a warm cheer to victory buzzed in your head.

god, did i luck out with peter… 

you found yourself repeating that observation often these days. it’s only been two months into the semester, but you’ve already concluded that peter was leagues better than your previous roommate. though, the bar was low—he was kind of a homophobe. that guy was a walking proof of evidence that opposites, in fact, do not attract.

on the other hand, peter had proven that similar interests and personalities were the foundation of beautiful, growing relationships: both platonically and romantically. still, relationships were never that black and white—a grey area. a theory that will forever be tested on, only for the outcome to come out vaguer than before, you’ve realized.

peter was like you: friendly, smart, awkward at times, funny to some. you and him basically have the same qualities of a dog, but there was more to it. 

you both shared the same liking down to the genre of video games, the magic of fantasy novels, the cleanliness of a room, the color-coded organization of study notes, and more. 

from there, the similar line of characteristics began to blur. whereas you’d prefer to learn from experience, peter liked playing by the book—sticking to it if he could. peter liked red, you liked blue. he favored savory snacks, you devoured them, but preferred sweet drinks.

opposites attract—the theory was once again, broad in your honor.

difference and similarities aside, you were lucky to have peter in your life. the bedroom was colder before you went to shower, but now it blossomed with a gentle heat.

he knew you hated the cold after a warm shower.

taking the other towel, you dried off the rest of your body while you checked your phone for notifications: a missed call from a friend and a few emails regarding construction around the building you had your classes in.

seriously? still? it’s been almost a year already…

normally, you wouldn’t have walked into the bedroom like this, baring skin and all. but peter went to get food because you both have become familiarized with what they served as food at parties.

note to self: you cannot get full off alcoholic beverages. you and peter both tried two parties ago, and it ended with you two sharing the toilet bowl, detoxing your insides of that liquid poison the entire night. the only enjoyment that resulted from that night was learning that peter was a drunk-crier, and you, a drunk-dancer. your friendship had only leveled up since.

you slid on your white briefs once you dried off before shuffling to the other side of the room, browsing through your shared closet aimlessly: he took the left side, you took the right. it was always dim at those parties, so a nice outfit would be wasted. also, you somehow became a magnet for other people’s misfortunes. it took hours to get rid of the smell of this one girl’s vomit—you threw it out in the end. 

“no, no… it’s going to be cold later…” you cycled through your clothes again, sighing when nothing caught your eye. “guess i can wear this aga-“

“hey!” out of nowhere, peter’s voice sprung out from the side of the room, followed by a quiet thud, and you twisted your bare body towards the source out of fright.

“jesus, you scared me.” the closet door blocked your view of peter, and vice versa, but you presumed he was leaning against the frame—a habit you noted. “i didn’t even hear you come back.”

“sorry- what was i saying..? oh!” his shadow loomed between you and him, growing as he stepped closer to the closet. “did you want to eat now or-“

judging from the volume of his voice, you should’ve expected how close peter was when you shut the closet. “fuck!” you jumped back, eyes widening when he was practically chest to chest with you. “dude, you really gotta stop doing that.”

on a daily basis, you always looked up at him, but you never paid it much thought to how much taller he was. 

“sorry! guess everyone’s a little antsy with the- oh.” he paused.

“what?” you curiously looked up at him, catching sight of his wandering gaze. you were quick enough to follow it, flickering between glimpses of your bare body and face several times like a tennis ball. somehow, you didn’t puzzle the pieces between his shock and your curiosity until he backed away, skittish in nature.

you were in your underwear. still in your underwear. the barrier was the captor of your embarrassment, heat rosed your cheeks as you stood frozen. and with it, the barrier was also your savior.

 “oh- OH!” the size of your eyes matched his and upon realizing he’s been staring for far too long, peter cowered his gaze to the side, a gentlemanly hand blocking his sight as he further backed to the door frame, then blindly bumped his shoulder into the door. “i’m so sorry-“ 

“no, no! i should’ve knocked. i-“ he groaned out, pacifying the sting to his shoulder with his palm. “that was stupid of me, i’m gonna-“

that was another similarity that you both valued: privacy. 

before you could reply, he scattered off. for a moment, you felt hot in the face, in the neck, even on your chest. but it would only take a few more seconds for your skin to cool, comforted by the fact that you could’ve shown more—you didn’t.

when peter scrambled out of the room, his gaze fixated on the ground, to the stripes of his socks as they shuffled to the kitchen. 

but he never made it very far, because he was easily persuaded. either by his hormones, by the shape of your body, or by his closeted feelings about you. in the end, it didn’t matter because a tightening feeling conjured him back to his original spot—it was always going to be about you. 

he was silent in his footsteps, treading backwards to the bedroom as his throat ran dry—heartbeat equally.

tonight. i should do it tonight. are my feelings that obvious? god, i hope not. wait, no- they are! they gotta be… who the fuck wipes marshmallow off of your roommate’s lips and calls them cute?!

peter does.

as his thoughts ran rampant, clouded his regularly murky mind, you were in his line of sight, perfectly captured in the middle of his gaze—now stilled—awe-strucked while he watched you change. 

quick portraits of your thick thighs and calves came and went before they were completely masked by the slide of your shorts. then your stomach and chest; pliant, moist skin that layered over the contours of your body before being covered by a tee. he exhaled, then inhaled, smelling the scent of your shampoo and body wash, and he was delighted because you own that scent.

enraptured because only peter could have his senses triggered by you on a daily basis.

if peter could frame this moment, it would be an expensive endeavor that would sacrifice all the money in the world to find the most perfect materials that complemented your textured skin. your smooth body. your handsome face. 

you. that was all he wanted. 

peter had been trapped since the day he saw you unpacking your things into the dorm. sweaty from the sun, and you knew that, because you refused to shake hands with him until you insisted on washing up first. he wished you never did—your thighs looked better sweating under those shorts.

he’s had crushes before. one in middle school, three in high school. but they amounted to nothing, he never had the confidence. rather, he preferred isolating himself and admiring from afar. rejections had already been predicted, and he was used to the feeling of defeat. if someone were to accept his advances one day, then that would lead to a disruption of events—a catastrophic end to humanity—he joked.

you were different to peter. he loved how, for once, he didn’t have to be the one initiating conversation. he also loved how you didn’t use him for answers because instead, you would help him out with his assignments.

oh, is that professor warren’s class? I think i still have the textbook for her class… let me look. 

even when it would only take five minutes to grab a drink down the street, you still invited him. not out of pity like everybody once did, but because he was your friend. parties have never been your thing, but you accompanied them with him because it made him feel better—to know someone.

maybe since he’s grown more mature since then, but now that he was off on his own, it was up to him to predict his future. it was an advice you gave him one night, and he’s kept that close to his heart since then.  not the hate that had inflicted his mind, not his peers telling he wasn’t good enough for someone—but him.  

in his imaginary world, peter could feel the walls shake when he was around you. the buildings would then fall apart, the earth would scorch civilians and planetary life with heat, and the thundering rain would only make it worse. it was a morbid image. yet, if it meant that you truly liked him, then…

aliens, come do your thing. we insist upon an invasion!

peter wanted you. point, blank, period. it wasn’t his preferred way to confess, but intense sentiments of like, love, lust—all at the same time—ate him up on the inside, and he was scared of being devoid of feelings for you.

“i want… you,” peter muttered, and you jolted again, turning back around in case you misheard him. you were bewildered at the sight of him. once again, you didn’t hear his footsteps.

“what?” you shuffled nervously on your feet. the tension in the air was thick and hot now with the way he stared back at you, frightened yet assured.

“i want you.” there was credence in peter’s tone, and he neared to the door now. 

your eyes narrowed into the deep abyss of peter’s eyes as you sat on the foot of your bed, putting on socks. somewhere in your endeavors, you found a flicker of that familiar joke. “ha. ha. very funny,” you muttered bitterly.

it haunted you. as soon as you came out, you were taunted by those same exact words by your ‘friends,’ by your previous roommate. what made you different from them became a simple reason to cease empathy and kindness, and you were baffled that this was happening again.

maybe peter was like the others after all.

you avoided peter’s gaze in favor of the floor, the legs of your desk, your rug—anywhere but him—and you could feel the color drain out of your face, out of this room—deja vu. “look, i know it’s funny to you because i like guys and for whatever reason, straight guys like to flirt with gay men to get a reaction out of us,” 

the rug cushioned the weight of a familiar pair of feet, and you looked up, a great frown etched in your face when your eyes met peter’s. he towered over you, bewildered. “but it makes me uncomfortable. and it’s not funny to-“

he didn’t know what roused him. the pain in your voice made him want to apologize without any resort to excuses. the pout on your lips made him want to cradle your head, yet kiss you at the same time. the growing tent in his pants made him want to pin you to your bed, and simply ravish you.

it was all a blur. 

his impulsive thoughts became a reality once he stole the remaining words left in your distress, and clumsily swallowed them with a kiss. you didn’t have time to process his lips on yours because you were then pushed onto your back, stilted and surprised, as peter applied his weight on top of yours—his broader build shadowed you in welfare.

“pete-“ you groaned into the hot, breathy kiss, and despite the light attempts to push him away, you were compelled to return the wet exchange. breathlessly, you repeated, “stop, this isn’t funny-“ he kissed you again. all this time, you could’ve had him, but you deluded yourself into thinking otherwise. 

“i’m not laughing,” peter muttered, and his hips began moving into yours, aimlessly trying to alleviate the stiffness in his pants. “i want you.” his voice lowered—no longer a confession, but a demand. he rocked into you harder once he felt you throb under those tight short, and you slipped out a moan, memorizing the beat of peter that pulsated against you.

you remembered him being bashful when you two talked about your firsts. you weren’t completely inexperienced like he was, but you mentioned that it’s been a while since you’ve done anything remotely intimate. school was your focus, a relationship was your reward.

“peter,” you repeated again, he wasn’t listening. “peter.” he whispered a demand; to keep calling his name, and you couldn’t help but quietly chuckle at the cliché line often heard in soft porn.

then, you cupped your hands around his temples to pull him away. he gazed into you with ardent hunger, almost annoyed that you ruined the trail of kisses he began leaving on your neck. “did you drink without me? because if you did, then i don’t think we should-“

“i didn’t,” he sobered on the softness of your lips, and like a flip switch, he snapped out of his fictional world of you. “fuck- i’m so sorry, i didn’t even ask you if you wanted to- fuck, i even forgot to say that i like you.” he ranted to himself, beginning to pull himself away. “this was not how it was supposed to go.”

infatuation had expanded into something beyond your control, and your feelings for him ignited even more. a wick bursted into powerful flames, and it warmed your body knowing that you two shared the same sentiment.

before he completely peeled himself off your body, you pulled him down by the neck, then pressed your nose to his, grinning. “I like you too.” a peck to the tip of his nose, then the center of his lips. your onslaught of fleeting kisses to his skin drowned him, pacifying every muscle in his body until it became jelly, and also making it all the more easier to roll him under you. 

“not exactly how i imagined my first date with you, but,” you straddled his lap, roaming your hands around peter’s chest, an asset of his you’ve frequently daydreamed about. “you sure?”

the applied pressures to your waist, then bottom should’ve been a definite measure of his answer, but he smiled up at you, guiding a steady pace of your hips to his groin. he was easily distracted, suddenly cascading his other palm up your shirt then down to finally feel the bare skin he had spent long showers jerking off to. fantasies had now been served onto a platter before him, and peter planned on devouring you, piece by piece. “please.”

“must have had a lot on your mind if you couldn’t even confess to me.” it was unusual to see him like this—absolutely enthralled by your presence, high off of it. aching for more of you with the way he pushed his groin into you. “how long have you been thinking about this?” being unusual always had negative connotations to it. 

you pressed into him harder, rubbing at his print with gallant grinds. not in this moment. 

he moaned, “far too long…” then fumbled with the waistband of your shorts before doing the same with the zipper. “you’ve been driving me crazy, especially these days.” it was a simple task, a daily labor that peter was great at, but his hands shook when his finger met metal. you chuckled, and placed a comforting hand to his cheek, stroking the soft skin with the amplest caress. 

take your time. i’m not going anywhere.

“mind sharing what you thought about then?” the only time you peel yourself away from peter’s groin was to help him slide your shorts off, then his jeans. peter lifted his hips, and you two were joined together again. aching together. “just curious.” you joked by pulsating your bulge, and he shyly laughed when he saw the restrictive twitch. 

felt it.

“well... where do i start?” peter’s warm hand rested on your inner thigh, dangerously close to your erection while delicately exploring your soft skin. “there’s been so many times where i just wanted to…” he was too ashamed to finish his sentence, looking away.

“wanted to…?” your body arced over his, placing a persuading kiss to his cheek, then neck. “what was it?” they lingered, sunk deep into his skin with the utmost affection, and he left the deepest, pleasurable sighs as if you withdrew it from him. you commenced his dilemma. “tell me what you thought when you first saw me. saw that i was your roommate.”

 “i...” peter began, and you could tell his nerves got the best of him, so you rocked into him again, begged with your hips. the position made it easier to feel all of him, press into his warmth more, and you couldn’t stop. wouldn’t. “i didn’t know what to feel. i was happy, that i had someone as kind as you…” you gleefully hummed, agreeing as you continued leaving kisses to his neck.

“then i was nervous, because you were so… cute. handsome. beautiful.” he moaned when you began to grind in slow, deep strides. your bulges squeezed and pushed one another, peter did the same, growing impossibly bigger against you. “but when i saw you in those shorts, sweating because move-in day was always on a hot day…”

“yeah?” you beckoned him to finish his sentence because you were closing your eyes now, remembering that very moment because you felt the same. the way peter’s chest, his muscles, were broad and stunning under his own layer of sweat, under his loose shirt, under that naivety that you would never have dreamed to think of him as such a…

“i just wanted to fuck you.”

pervert.

the shy smile he gave you messed with your perception of him. clearly, you’ve underestimated him all this time, and you kissed him again. “so, you only thought about pleasuring yourself.”

he quickly broke the kiss to defend himself. “wait, no! t-that’s not what i meant.”

“peter, relax.” your laugh calmly settled into a comforting smile, and you blindly reached down to his thick print, feeling and squeezing at whatever you can because you were desperate to explore him. “i’m joking.” his chest rose.

for the remainder of time, you spent it stroking peter through his underwear. dryly to his frustration, but he never told you because he wanted to experience you in every way. his lips never left yours, only parted to moan into your mouth when you shoved your hand into his briefs to sate your desire to feel him bare.

peter was big in your small hand. the weight felt suffocating to your palm when you grabbed ahold of his sack, fondling his balls, then stroking his cock again, and you were intoxicated in the way he melted under you, looked into you, begged for you to go faster. 

you did. who wouldn’t when he gazed at you with the most puppy-like eyes?

he had complete control of you now, because every action, every stroke, from then on had been a journey to his personal paradise. you didn’t care that you were left abandoned, that you were aching harder than he was. watching him was more than adequate.

both pairs of briefs and shirts have been tossed to the side now, and you maintained your straddle. it was riveting to watch how much bigger peter was when you took both of your cocks together and stroked. he practically enveloped you with the weight of his length, the girth of his shaft, and you wallowed in the fact that he was incredibly bashful about it. 

peter’s hand never left your body. he charmed you by his neediness. it was clumsy in execution, but he always squeezed a moan out of you with he felt your ass, your chest, your nipples, your thighs. “fuck, pete.”

everything about you was beautiful, incredibly more so when you caved into him as he dealt kisses to your bare skin and took his own turn at jerking the both of you off.

he was eager. delirious. hard, stiffening hard, against you, and you felt every vein pulsate the harder— the faster—he squeezed and stroked. you leaned back, hands planted to the mattress beneath you, then maneuvered your hips to the rhythm of his fist. you found a pace while peter kept you steady, and fucked into his fist, against his wet cock, sliming your dripping pre-cum together with the utmost fervor. 

“wait, (m/n),” he hiccuped, and his hold on you tightened, nails dug into your left waist but you ignored his plea, fucking steadily into his fist. “stop, i’m going to-“ they fell on deaf ears, and mouth agape, peter watched you with incredulity. you can feel his body flex, your balls smushed to his when you grinned up, your pre-cum sticking to his, his to yours, like a sick web. “s-stop, oh god.”

and peter unraveled before you with a guttural moan, finishing the rest of his plea with a blasting of thick and creamy ropes to his chest, like a cannon. the force was strong enough to have a few shots land on his face, then his hair, and then somewhere above because peter was a big shooter—a strong one, you’d passionately testify. “f-fuck, i didn’t mean to cum so-“

“holy shit.” you watched peter in all his glory, then in his embarrassment, while stilted on his lap and sweating, not taking notice of the delay of your climax because it crept up on you quick. a rocket broke the cloud in your thoughts with a boom, and you spilled all over him, shooting like fireworks. “shit!”

peter was your canvas, and it was your duty to paint him. debris of sex splattered everywhere, because you somehow found the strength to continue fucking yourself into the cream of fist, unloading and unloading onto him until you were dry, heaving and dripping.  

“fuck- I didn’t mean to ruin your sheets-” he mumbled, a blush stained his cheeks, and you joined in the warmth with a kiss, panting.

“where’s the fun in all of this if you aren’t going to stain at least one thing.” your brows raised at the wet stain on the wall above peter’s head, right below your wall-shelf, and peter’s gazed followed. 

he groaned, distressed by the evident he made. “fuck, sorry…” his bashfulness only endeared you even more. 

“it’s okay,” you hopped off his lap, stretching your arms into the air. “i’ll clean you up.”

“okay,” peter lay still, his hand cautiously held over his stomach to catch the drips of his cum and yours. it was fascinating to watch the mixture flow together, strands of it melding and un-webbing as he played with the sticky residue. it was the scientist in him. “my towel is on the- fuck-“

without a beat, you took his dripping flaccid cock into your mouth, sucking off any remnants of spunk. an unfamiliar taste you weren’t used to, bitter and salty. it wasn’t until you noticed how peter’s eyes glazed over you, half-lidded because he was in heaven now, that you found the taste of him delectable. peter’s caution for staining your bed sheets was disregarded, because he knew you’d clean the rest of him off. 

after you pulled away with a soft pop, he traced your wet lips with the cum on his fingers, then his knuckles, before he pushed one by one into your mouth. one finger at first, then two, then three, you moaned erotically around his digits as peter pumped, marveling in the eagerness of your mouth. he slowly pushed more cum into your mouth. the creamy residue gathered at the corner of your mouth at first but he made sure to scoop it back in, and continued doing so until he was polished clean. 

nothing was wasted. 

the taste of you and him spread in the warmth of your tongue, and you have never felt more intoxicated.

to peter, you have never looked more beautiful.

nouearth. please do not repost, plagiarize, or translate my works. andif you like this story, please reblog and leave a like!

[comicaurora]

I heard you talking on a recent OSPod about Hades, and as someone who very much can get ADHD-yoinked into games, it got me curious, but I'm...not great at video games and have found Dark Souls-y games where you try over and over and keep failing at the same task kind of frustrating. How's your Hades experience been in those regards? (although I'm not sure your general game skill)

Hades feels like it's really carefully designed to circumvent those frustrations.

I also hate the feeling of lost progress, which had me wary about playing a roguelite defined by constantly trying and mostly failing, but by far the most helpful part of the game design is that Zagreus also hates it, so it feels like the game and I are on the same page about it.

It also helps that most of the actual, tangible progress in the game is bound up in advancing the character arcs, which isn't a totally skill-free experience since it involves finding a couple characters out in the underworld, but a lot of it can be done back in the House of Hades, so every time you lose and die you can run around having conversations with everyone, almost all of which will be new and unique and advance your arc with them. If a character doesn't have a new interaction for you, you usually just can't find them on the floor, so there's very little time-wasting.

Speaking of, there's a lot of advancement that can only be done in the House of Hades, and a lot of it involves resources you can actively choose to seek out on runs. I did a couple runs today where my only goal was getting the last of a specific olympian's Boons so I could fill out their Minor Prophecy achievement and reap the rewards, and everything after that was just a bonus. This means the game is passively encouraging the player to develop secondary objectives beyond just making it to the end of the game again. It also helps that making it to the end of the game basically just gives you a weapon-unlocking resource and another small slice of conversation with [EXTREMELY OLD SPOILERS] so while it feels important, and is necessary for advancing towards the true ending of the game, it's not so overwhelmingly rewarding that you feel absolutely crushed when the final boss takes you out halfway through his second healthbar again.

You also benefit very greatly from not playing the game the same way twice - using new weapons or adding new challenge modes is the only way to re-acquire the unique boss rewards for the three main regions of the underworld, instead of the more generic resources that replace the unique ones after you win them for the first time, which means instead of feeling like you need to optimize a winning build and then use it every time, you're encouraged to play with the other weapons that you might find unwieldy or annoying, and if you manage to beat even the first boss with them, you'll be disproportionately rewarded. Also, on every run a random weapon will be empowered to give you bonus resources if you choose to use it, so even if you're a strictly melee-only main you might find yourself willing to figure out how to use the bow in exchange for the extra gems. The Boons you get also dramatically change the strategy you're likely to naturally fall into over the course of fighting your way out - some builds are extremely melee-based, others just boost your ranged abilities to the point that you can mostly just dash around the battlefield while your Casts chew through everyone's healthbar at top speed. So when you reach the final boss, you're not going to be using the same strategies, and even if you lose, it feels less like you had a skill issue and more like you've learned something to look out for or try out next time around. The final boss's strategies and moves don't change either, so you'll know what to expect every time even as your own moveset might be completely different from run to run.

In my personal experience, I have a pretty good feel for when a game is disappointed in my performance. Nothing says "the designers didn't expect you to get stuck here" like endlessly looping dialogue or not-so-subtle hints that you can knock down the difficulty if you need to. Hades has thus far done this to me very little, and only in specific areas - even if I'm no longer getting unique banter with Theseus every time I kick his ass, I'm still having unique conversations with Asterius in the same region and it doesn't feel like I'm anywhere near done with the dialogue back in the House. Zagreus's dialogue when he enters the same three boss arenas will also randomly go from seemingly-interchangeable lines of "yep it's this boss again" to much more unique angles that legitimately change the game from then on. Yesterday, after killing the bone hydra something like a dozen times, he randomly decided to nickname it Lernie, and now he consistently calls it Lernie and every time I kill it the victory banner says "LERNIE VANQUISHED". Today he got Tisiphone to say his name instead of just "murderer" all the time. The game knows you're going to be fighting these guys a lot, and this tells me I haven't outstayed my welcome in the anticipated main timeline of gameplay.

If I have a frustration, it's that I'm not always sure that what I'm doing is advancing the character plotlines, and you can only talk to a character once on any given visit to the House. The game kind of helps you out here, your little information codex will tell you stuff like "Learn more by having X more conversations with this character" or "learn more by deepening your relationship with this character" but it can still be pretty vague and opaque. There's no dialogue trees, Zagreus basically just says what he wants, so when, for instance, Achilles indicates that I should talk to Nyx about maybe getting Orpheus's deal with Hades undone, it's a little frustrating that I can't then go over to Nyx and ask her about that. Or, in fact, ask her about it at all in any of the dozen runs I've done since that nugget got dropped. It's not a game-breaker, but it is a little frustrating. On the other hand, this is clearly intentional, because this means you're tempted to get back into a run as quickly as possible, because then when you die more conversations will have unlocked back at the house - but also, to deincentivize just running out and dying on purpose to get those dialogues going, there are some characters who will only appear in the House if you get far enough into the run to deal with them, and certain characters whose arcs and dialogue only advance if you find and talk to their missing loved ones out on the run. So you'll always have something new back at the House, but you're strongly encouraged to get as far as you can before you die, because the farther you get, the more you'll have to do when you get back.

The game is basically designed to never, ever make you want to sit still. You can quickly exhaust everything there is to do in the house, and that makes you want to go out on a run and see what new things will happen. Then while you're on the run you have the benefit of randomization keeping things interesting and making you make plans for the next time you encounter a given character. It's got a good rhythm to it!

[wosoluver]

I have a request for Lena Oberdorf x Bayern Reader.

On the topic of her transfer to Bayern. This request is full on fluff with maybe a little angst of them being apart.

Reunited

Can we please get one about Obi loving domestic life with Reader when they see each other (cooking together, cuddling while watching movies & even versing each other at video games). But misses it dearly when the two have to be apart for months on end due to their commitments with their respective clubs. Sure the two see each other during the national break but that’s not enough. So Obi decides to transfer to Bayern to be with Reader 24/7.

Reunited.

Lena Oberdorf x reader

Lena Oberdorf Masterlist

──✩₊⁺⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧──

"Finally reunited!" you said as you put your seatbelt on.

"Only for a little bit though." she said turning on the engine, to drive to her apartment from picking you up at the airport.

"Don't say that, we have a couple of days." you grabbed the hand she had in your thigh, intertwining your fingers and kissing the back of it.

"Sorry schatz. I swear, I'm very excited to spend time together."

You were a Bayern Munich player, and your girlfriend, well, she was one of your best rivals. She played for Wolfsburg.

You can say it took a lot of concessions, to make the relationship work.

"Okay love, I'm going to shower. Can you order dinner for us?"

"Yeah. Movie night or game night?"

"Game night!" you said disappearing into the bedroom's in suite.

──✩₊⁺⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧──

"How does it feel to lose for the third time in a row?" she asked as you pouted your lips.

"You cheated this last round!"

"Well, all is fair in love and war." she tried to reason.

"And which one was it? Love or war?" she had distracted you, by removing her sweatshirt, staying in only a pair of shorts and a sports bra.

It would've been fine if she did it because she was hot. But she did it exactly to distract you. Flexing her muscles at any chance she got.

"Both. I wanted to win the game and I love to see you drooling." she said teasing you.

"I didn't drool!"

"You so did." she said pulling you to sit on her lap.

"Fine. How could I not? I'm dating the embodiment of a goddess."

That would have been enough, if she wasn't already turned on by you naturally.

"I think it's time we go to bed." she said with a naughty look on her face.

──✩₊⁺⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧──

"Good Morning my love." she said kissing your temple. You opened your eyes, taking in Lena's sleepy and puffy face, as a ray of light came through the window.

"Good morning liebling. Slept well?"

"The best I have, since the last time we slept in the same bed." she would always bring up the fact you guys were separated by over 400 kilometers, constantly.

"In a couple of years, this will be our lives everyday." you reassured her, the best you could every time.

"I'll die of happiness when that happens."

This woman made your heart feel like it was about to explode.

"How about we cook some breakfast? I can make your favorite."

"Yes! I've been craving it." giving you a kiss before getting up. "Let's go."

"I've never seen you get up so fast in my life." as you followed her to get cleaned up.

"I don't know how you make this taste so good. Usually healthy versions of things taste like cardboard." as you prepared the pancake batter.

"We can't really break our diets, so. Also it's just a good recipe."

"Don't play it on the recipe. It's all you. Take a complement please."

"Thank you, schatz. How about we make a smoothie to complement it?"

"I'll start cutting the fruits." but before she could turn, you grabbed her attention.

"Hey..." you said dabbing a finger in the liquid and tapping it on her nose.

"Oh, it's on." letting out a mischievous grin.

──✩₊⁺⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧──

You had the day all to yourselves. Not wanting to waste your time with anyone that wasn't each other, you decided upon watching movies. Only movies ever allowed to play by your girlfriend, was Disney movies. Not that you would ever complain. And you had chose the first one. Tangled.

Cuddling up to her. She was almost always the big spoon, only setting for other option when she felt extremely needy. So you laid on your back, as she placed her head on your chest, cuddling to your side the best she could, since you were a bit smaller than her.

You spent your time focusing partially on the movie and partially in gently combing her hair through you fingers and massaging her scalp.

"They are just like us. I'm obviously Flynn, good looking, funny, has a hot girlfriend."

"And I look nothing like Rapunzel."

"No, but you would probably defend yourself with a frying pan, if someone broke into the apartment."

She never failed at making you laugh. You loved that about her.

Every time you spent more time around eachother, she was more and more sure, of wanting to marry you. Of taking the decision to ask for a transfer.

She hadn't brought up yet. She was waiting till it felt like it was the right moment.

While you held each other under the blankets, you noticed she wasn't paying attention at all. So you brought up what you thought was bothering her.

"Aren't you supposed to be looking for a new apartment? I thought your lease was ending this summer."

"I've looked at some but, not one of them felt right." she mustered all her courage for her next words. It was now or now.

"It will only feel like a home, if I have you with me."

"What do you mean?"

"What if I moved to Munich?"

"That would be amazing! Are you planning to leave Wolfsburg next year?"

"Actually, I'm asking for a transfer over the summer."

"Are you messing with me?"

"I'm serious. All is fair in love and war, I want to move into a more competitive club and I want to be with you, close to you, not having to take a plane just to kiss you."

"You are?" You instantly jumped up on the bed.

"Yes." she said laughing as you jumped on the bed.

You landed on top of her. Pulling her into a hug.

"Love, I can't breathe properly." she said under you.

"Sorry, right, you have to be alive for that to happen." she pulled you back to her.

"I love you." she left a kiss on your forehead.

"And I love you." you said placing a kiss on her lips.

──✩₊⁺⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧──

Hope you like it! Thanks for sending this in 🩷

[just-jordie-things]

indulge me for a second here (at ur own time ofc)

megumi breaks up w reader for reasons (wants to focus on training or sum) but reader starts acting a lill crazy especially when she thinks he might be seeing other women. She's txting him, sending suggestive pics, flirting, cockblocking other women- just the usual, you know?

Then she stops.

Leaving megumi with a whole crisis. Didn't he want this? Why is he missing all her attention? Why is she giving *his* attention to other guys?

I just want that toji and gojo side of him to flare up and chase the reader all over again 😇😇😇😇

AAAHHH YES i need to add more toxicity to my fics bc lets be real we'd all behave like this to get him back :3

kinda feel like this could be a prequel to the blurb i wrote about ex bf!megumi cockblocking you n trying to win you back

suggestive content under the cut but no smut ___

you're a good girl, definitely better than this, but to be honest he left you no choice, didn't he?

how else were you supposed to get his attention? it's not like those other girls had anything to offer him, so you just had to... give him a reminder of what he had, and that he could have it again if he stopped being a man slut and crawled right back to you where he belonged.

(was he really being a man slut? you couldn't actually know... all you knew was what you heard from rumors. but that was enough to warrant all of this... wasn't it?)

you didn't care how much money you spent on pretty lacey sets, or how much time you spent draping yourself in the most inviting poses you could come up until your my eyes only album was overflowing with tasteful nudes. and every single one of them was sent to him.

there wasn't an ounce of humiliation in your body, sending nudes and other suggestive photos/videos to your ex-boyfriend. you were sure that eventually he would be swayed... if it wasn't by baby pink then maybe an angelic white... or classic red.... to you, this was just a means to an end. eventually he'd understand what he was missing and he'd come back begging to get back together.

when he doesn't realize his mistake after a month of spamming his phone... you lose interest. naturally, of course. if he could look at all those photos, watch all those videos to completion, and still not want you back? well, that was his loss.

truthfully, you got bored. and at some point you came to the realization that there were other hot, single, desperate guys out there who would love a glimpse of what was wasted on megumi. so you steered your attention in another direction and almost forgot about your ex completely.

well, you forgot about him until he started showing up around you all the time.

at first it was the bars, anywhere you spent your time with nightlife, he was bound to show up there. whether you were drinking or dancing, or just sitting in a booth wrapped up in the company of someone else, megumi was there to see it.

you might've moved on, but you weren't oblivious. you saw him. you just didn't seem to care. never giving him more than a passing glance before your attention was returned to whoever was lucky enough to get it tonight. megumi's not sure he ever saw you with the same guy twice

even when he moved on to stalking your other hangouts. like the coffee shop you frequented most days of the week. once he started seeing your distraction of the night coming in with you on their arm in the mornings, too, megumi started to lose his mind.

what was the point of all those messages you sent? all the photos with your body on display for him attached with 'thinking of you' or a little kiss emoji- those were all just for him, weren't they? and now you're parading around with every willing guy you find?

megumi's in denial. this wasn't like you, you didn't play games, you weren't a slut, so what was your goal here?

if it was to drive him crazy, you most definitely had the upper hand. but he was determined that it wouldn't last for long.

you wanted to play shitty games? fine, megumi could play shitty games. he'll make sure you come to regret getting over him so easily.

[sorreysorren]

if you think about it, it's like a game

he was enthralled by you in the same way he'd be when he found a game that was actually challenging.

(a/n: so you make his heart go doki doki?? and then you both go kiss kiss fall inlove???)

⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘

phase i — the trigger

(aka the storm)

you stood at the entrance of the training field, although it was well past midnight.

it would take a while for blue lock’s backup generators to kick in during the storm.

everyone had already headed off to wash up or return to their dorms– in pure darkness.

a handful had planned to continue practicing, but after various hits to the faces, from one to another, ball after ball; deeming it impossible to continue, everyone begrudgingly left. 

but you decided to come back. you could make it work, or at least that’s what you thought. 

you thought wrong though, because the flashlight from your phone wasn’t enough to let you practice effectively. you didn’t have to see through the darkness to be able to tell that you were missing goal after goal. 

you decided that maybe you could stay up until the backup generators began operating. you wanted time to practice solo, rather than in a group setting, so you thought maybe you could be the first one to use the training field.

of course, though, you weren’t sure when the generators would actually come and do their job, so this could end up being a waste of your time. 

you sat in the training grounds, mindlessly playing papa’s freezeria, humming along to the soundtrack every time you finished an order correctly. there was a customer in the game: he had a bowl cut and glasses, heavily resembling ego, which caused you to snicker. it was almost taunting because soon, your thoughts circle back to the power outage.

you mentally scold ego in your brain for the way he chose to invest blue lock’s funds.

seriously.

you ought to think he’d be doing his best to get everyone back on schedule, considering his evident distaste for the current situation, but surprisingly; he too, suggested calling it a day.

at some point, you decided to get up and head to the cafeteria, having grown slightly hungry after also playing papa’s donuteria. and papa’s cupcakeria. and papa’s bakeria. and– okay. you were really  hungry.

as you walked out towards the hallway, your heart leaped out of your chest when you thought you saw a shadowy figure.

you do a double take, and flash your phone’s bright flashlight at what you thought was something resembling the babadook (if this was a horror movie, you would’ve just wasted 15 seconds and caused your own death.)

you sigh in relief after realizing it’s only nagi.

you’re certain you can still hear your heart thumping through your ears.

“..sorry.” you tell him after seeing his scrunched-up expression, quickly retreating your phone from his face, “i didn’t think anyone else would be out here”

“oh. same.” he yawned.

your eyes wander behind him, from the direction you assumed he came from. “were you in the cafeteria?”

he nods. “i forgot the outage meant the food order system wouldn’t work.”

you pause. you hadn’t thought of that. 

but then an idea pops into your head: “did you try the vending machines?”

he looked at you as if you were stupid, “that’s also powered by electricity”

“well,  yeah,”  you say while removing one of the bobby pins from your hair,  “but these exist too.”

---

the two of you sat at a table near the corner of the cafeteria. in front of you were a crap ton of different kinds of snacks, candy, etc. 

it was silent at first, the only noise was the crinkling of your kitkat bar. 

nagi didn’t seem to mind it, as he started watching a video on his phone. 

you took notice of how many twizzlers he’d gotten. an ungodly amount.

you were a twizzler hater.

“do you really like those?” you hadn’t meant to sound so judgy, but you couldn't help yourself.

“if i didn’t, why would i be eating them?” he answered simply. he didn’t seem to take offense. though it wasn’t really an answer if he was replying with another question.

to each their own , you thought. at least it wasn’t black licorice.

⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘

phase ii — the manifestations

(aka the feelings)

the following day, the power was finally back.

everyone was eating their meal, talking, or doing their own thing.

near the end, ego’s face popped up on the wall, making yet another announcement before signing off, out of spite, ego announced the vending machines would be out of service for a while until the various amounts of snacks that miraculously… "disappeared”  (as ego emphasized with a scornful tone) were replaced.

nagi’s eyes instinctively wandered towards where you were, and the two of you made eye contact. it was sort of like an inside joke.

nagi didn't speak to many others except reo. in fact, he wasn't interested in being around anyone else. so if reo saw nagi show even the slightest interest in anyone, reo would know they must have something of a character.

---

days passed. 

there was a morning in which nagi found you in the training field, 

well, he didn’t find you.

he left his water bottle there earlier and he would’ve sent reo to get it, but he was in the shower.

he watched you dribble, touch drills, and practice target accuracy.

nagi continues to recall the night of the power outage.

you’d just been coming out of the training field.

he wondered if you were trying to practice then as well.

he was enthralled by you in the same way he'd be when he found a game that was actually challenging. 

what he didn't know is that you'd be a challenge to him in more ways than one.

it wasn't just your looks. 

it was how you played, and how you presented yourself; you were egocentric, but you were genuine. you were egocentric when you needed to be, and you still found the time to be kind. you kept a balance. 

every now and then, with a shy smile on your face, you’d offer him a pack of twizzlers. 

that action made his chest twist in an unfamiliar way. 

it was a hassle.

this feeling distracted him when he played his favorite games. it distracted him when he was trying to multitask (50% whatever he’s doing, 40% that feeling, 10% listening to reo).

he came to associate that feeling with only you.  the y/n effect ,  he’d  subconsciously come to call it. (50% whatever  he's  doing, 40%  you, 10% listening to reo).

these were the thoughts that went through nagi's head. things he would never say aloud. the kinds of thoughts foreign to him– as many things having to do with human-to-human connections and interaction were.

reo knew this. reo noticed this.

when he caught nagi staring at you for an extended period, he realized this was nagi's edition of a crush. which was weird. because nagi wasn't the type of guy to just get crushes.

but now, every so often nagi’s gaze would leave his phone, and he’d glance around until he caught sight of you.

⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘

phase iii — ???

nagi wasn't a jealous person.

he wasn't even jealous whenever you got your hands on some rare game that just came out that you happened to earn through the amount of goals you scored (reo's trust-fund-ass would probably just get for him anyway, but still.)

he could see that this “y/n effect” that’s taken over his life didn’t affect him alone.

he didn’t like that.

nagi was not a jealous person.

but whenever he saw you smile at another the same way you smiled at him, the grip he held on the phone in his hands grew tighter. 

“nagi? hey chill, don’t get too upset over a game.”  reo would tell him after taking notice of his white knuckles. reo had a hunch this wasn’t about the game on his phone at all, though.

of course, nagi didn’t know that the smile you gave to others wasn't the same smile you gave to only him.

---

during meal hours you’d started sitting with nagi, reo, and zantetsu. 

it wasn’t really a thing that was premeditated, it kind of just happened.

reo was wary of you at first. he wanted to dislike you, but he couldn’t find a genuine reason to do so. plus points for liking some of the same artists as him.

zantetsu didn’t really care. you were just another face to the table.

at first, you sat across from nagi, but soon, you began sitting next to him. sometimes you’d exchange parts of your meal. for example, you could have some of his ramen, if he could have some of your onigiri.

you still brought him a pack of twizzlers every day.

each time, he’d stop his game for a second to open the pack. before resuming, he’d glance at you and mutter a quick  “thanks.” 

---

it was unconscious, the way your pinky interlocked with his as you sat next to him in the cafeteria. that was another thing that just happened on its own. neither of you ever acknowledged it out loud, but people (like reo, specifically) took notice. 

the interlocked pinkies would turn into hand-holding. again, another thing that wasn’t addressed out loud.

in a way, it was like a game.

one small achievement leads to another step, which leads to another achievement, which ultimately leads to an ending.

and if there’s one thing that nagi is good at, it’s winning games.

⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘

[mha-cuties-pls]

Incel!Shigaraki x reader Headcannons

Pairing: Shigaraki x Reader | Rating: M | Words: n/a | genre: smut

A/N: Soooooo, writing these actually gave me the best idea for a scenario 🥴 just in love with the idea of touch starved and incredibly horny Incel!Shigaraki fixating on a girl and attempting to force her into submission, only to find out she had been craving him just as much as he was

Incel!Shigaraki that notices you in public one day when he was out at the mall buying a new video game, unable to tear his eyes away from your suggestively lewd outfit, deciding that a beautiful girl dressed like that in public wanted, no needed, his greedy eyes to objectify you. Shigaraki couldn’t usually have cared less about other people when he went out in public. They didnt share the same intelligence level or tenacity he did, and besides, they would all submit to The League of Villains in due time anyways; there was no point in trying to converse with any of them. That was, at least, until he stopped by the mall one day to pick up the newest edition of a game that had just been released, and his eyes couldn’t help but lock onto your voluptuous figure. It’s not like it was his fault he was staring, in that short skirt and tight tank top you were practically naked. He could even tell you weren’t wearing a bra as his eyes followed each bounce and jiggle of your chest as you walked over to the Nintendo Switch games. Still mesmerized, he watched you from across the store, and his heart began to pick up when you bent down to retrieve Cooking Mama on the bottom row, allowing him to catch a quick glimpse of your underwear. Feeling the twitch in his pants, he was unable to tear his eyes away from you- even when your gaze met his. What really sealed your fate, however, was the fact that upon meeting his eyes, you had the audacity to smirk at his actions. It was then that Tomura decided you needed to be taught a lesson.

Incel!Shigaraki who begins to stalk you in his free time, watching with distain every time he saw you talking to another guy he had never seen before Watching you giggle and playfully hit the male companion who sat next to you at the food court made Shigarakis skin boil. He knew that there was no way you were actually laughing that hard at anything that guy had to say; You were just being the slutty little girl that you were, probably craving and aching between your legs in ways that you should only be doing for him. Shigarakis grimace continued as he fumed from the corner where he sat watching, scratching at his neck and trying not to let his explosive anger get in the way of his careful planning.

Incel!Shigaraki who finally, after observing you for weeks, makes his move when he sees you alone one day buying bubble tea, and despite his inexperience, actually does a phenomenal job playing the part of a charmer. “Why don’t you come back with me for a bite to eat?” He says, voice laced with something that you can’t quite put your finger on. “I know this great hole in the wall and besides,” pulling his hood back a bit so you can more clearly see his features, you saw the ghost of a smile that was almost sinister tugging at his scarred lips, “we’ll be able to talk more privately there.”

Incel!Shigaraki who has never had sex, but wastes no time fulfilling his darkest and roughest desires, living out fantasies he had only ever seen on porn, never imaging he would be blessed with such a beautiful, obedient little whore of his own He stared down with an almost incredulous look on his face as he watched you slink down in front of him with your beautiful ass perched high in the air, your slick entrance shining in the low light of the room just begging for him to finally enter. He shoved himself inside clumsily and with force you weren’t expecting, making you cry out as he filled your aching cunt. You heard him breathing heavily, and he declined to move at first. Looking back over your shoulder, you saw his eyes basking in the sight before him. His hands were gripping your ass and shaking it, even giving small slaps watching your fat jiggle in a way more delectable than he ever could have imagined. When he watched porn he always imagined what it would actually be like to have a beautiful woman under him, complacent and begging for his touch; But the reality proved to be so much better than he ever could have thought. Seemingly coming back to reality after his quick daydream, he pulled out ever so slowly, before slamming into you with even more force than before. “____,” he said, his voice low and gravelly, “scream my name.”

Incel!Shigaraki who stares almost too intently at your stark naked form, just drinking in the erotic sight of your curves and soft skin, making you blush a bit and serving to make you feel sexy and a little more confident than you usually would

Incel!Shigaraki who talks a big game, but ends up inevitably going too hard too fast after he finally stuck it in, involuntarily cumming inside you with delicious whimpers of his own Shigarakis ferocious and sporadic thrusts culminated suddenly with an almost violent stop, and he laid his body across your back as you stayed on your hands and knees on the bed. Feeling his dry lips brush your neck with a sloppy kiss caused you to relax, and you felt his length beginning to soften inside you. “Fuck, ____.” His whispers danced lightly across the sensitive skin behind your ear, and you closed your eyes, enjoying the proximity between you two at the moment. “Your pretty pussy was squeezing my dick so good I came faster than I expected.” Then, he snaked his arms around your waist, grabbing your hips, and flipping you two so you both lay on your backs with you cuddled up to his side snuggly. Though just as you were about to let the aftermath haziness of your release lull you into a deep sleep in Tomouras arms, he brushed some of your messy locks behind your ear as he whispered, “I hope you’re ready for round 2.”

[earthry]

Hello love I know your requests are closed, but i have to get it out of my system and tell to you about it (please just ignore me) I can't stop thinking about the idea of papas breaking up with reader to protect them and even telling them 'I never loved you' because this way it will be a faster way for reader to move on and stop asking question to their papa, BUT i think the even more angstiest plot twist would be if it was the exactly same day when reader was ready to tell her papa she's pregnant. A few months/weeks after this whole breaking out thing he could by accident find out about 'the news' (im sorry for taking your time, but this thing is on my mind literally on a loop for days and i think you're angst enjoyer just like me ALSO i hope you have an amazing weekend)

~🐍

Aksjshsh ANON it’s funny cause I literally had something almost exactly like that in my discarded drafts snsbsbsb I don’t really plan on finishing it or writing a full HC for it, but here's a little treat just for you. You can imagine any Papa here <3

tw: pregnancy, slut-shaming, self deprecation, hurt/comfort, angst, breaking up, happy ending! please keep in mind this is mostly unedited and just randomly written out spur of the moment.

After the breakup, everything he does reminds him of you. 

It was a mistake— thinking that breaking up with you would set you on the right path, a better one. You had a whole life ahead of you, he didn’t want you wasting it by waiting for him every time he left for tour or had to cancel plans to attend to his papal duties.

He can see the toll it takes on you, the crestfallen expression you think you hide so well when he has to leave a date night early or when he has to call a rain check. The anxiety vibrating off you when you text him after a new concert video is released of him flirting with the audience, asking if it's okay to get reassurance that it’s just an act.

He needed to let you go.

It broke his heart to, but he in his eyes it was setting you free for your own good. You would never let him go if you knew his reasoning— he knew this so he had to make it seem like he didn’t want you anymore.

You didn’t believe him at first, begging him to open up to you and to stop joking around. You were convinced something or someone must have said something; the Papa you knew loved you, he wouldn’t suddenly fall out of love so quickly or be so cruel. 

So he aims for the heart. He tells you it wasn’t really real, that it was all a game to him to play house for a while because he was curious. Now that his curiosity has been sated and he is bored, he sees no reason to keep you around.

It hurts him to say so, and he will never forgive himself for it, but he tells you that he never loved you in the first place, that you were just another body. That you were so easy to bed, it only took a few sweet words and you had already fallen so hard. He calls you laughable. Pathetic. A whore. He laughs as tears begin to gather, taunting you when you run out crying.

You avoid him after that— and he has his Ghouls deliver anything that you’d left in his room to your old room. 

You toss the positive pregnancy test that you were waiting for the perfect moment to show him— it seems like there would be no perfect moment, there would be no moment at all.

He may not have loved you, but you did. Despite the pain, you can’t imagine a universe that you wouldn’t keep his baby. 

You just don’t know how he’ll react. Once upon a time you had thought he would never ask you to get rid of the baby, that he would ask you what you wanted first and respect that decision. But you had also thought he loved you just as much and you were so very wrong.

You try hiding it as long as you can but eventually your belly gets too round to conceal. 

You can see the realization cross his face in real time and when he tries approaching, you can’t help but look at him with hurt, fearful eyes. All it takes is for you to rest a protective hand on your stomach to tell him what he wanted to know. 

“I’m sorry,” you blurt out, “I’m sorry, please don’t make me—“ you swallow back a soft sob, unable to even finish the sentence.

Of all the things he’s ever done, leading a satanic church, promoting sin and pleasure and corruption, this will forever be what he feels guiltiest for.

He doesn’t even think before reaching for you, trying to pull you into his arms to comfort. Can't think of anything else except that right now he needs to soothe you, needs to fix this.

Before, you would have melted into his embrace straight away. Now, however, you struggle and push him back.

He lets you, not wanting to force anything, not wanting to distress you. It’s bad for you— and the baby.

"Tesoro," He tries, gentling his tone as much as he can, holding his hands out with his palms up in an attempt to show that he means no harm, "Shh, shh— I won't make you, I'm not mad. I promise."

You don't believe him and he can tell from the way you are holding yourself— like a house of cards one blow from caving in. You don't know if you can do this again.

He had made promises before, too. Promises you had foolishly believed with naivety. How could you be so stupid, so gullible? To believe that out of all the people in the ministry, in the world, he would choose you? That Papa Emeritus himself could love you.

You should have seen it from the start but you had been too in love with him, too busy making sure you could be enough for him, only to realize that you never would be. There's a sinking realization that you were never enough in the first place.

You never meant anything, after all. He said it himself.

You wonder how it must have felt for him, to have to deal with your inadequacy and even your desire to learn how to make things feel good for him because you had little experience. He must have found it laughable, he certainly told you so.

You were laughable. Pathetic. Whore.

To want to be good at the one only thing you were good for... you wonder how he was able to stand you that long.

You put distance between you and him, arms wrapped protectively around your waist. He looks pained and you're having trouble figuring out what.

Was it because it would ruin his reputation? To have knocked up someone like you?

"I won't say anything," you rush out, "No one will know it's yours, please. Please let me keep it. Please."

"Amore mio—"

"I'm not your 'amore'. I never was, never will be. It's okay I understand that now. Please let me k-keep it."

"I..." He wants to say more, he wants to comfort you and hold you. But he doesn't really have a right to anymore and he can tell how upset you are, he doesn't want to aggravate you any further. "Yes, yes you can keep it. I won't interfere, you have my word."

You still look doubtful and he adds, "I swear to Lucifer himself."

There's a little more reassurance in that. You know him enough to know he wouldn't say those words lightly, even if he had lied to you and toyed with you the way he did. There's a relief that passes over you and you thank him as quickly as you can before dashing off. You hear him shout your name but you don't stop and he doesn't follow.

---

INSERT PAPA DOING HIS BEST TO MAKE UP AND DO EVERYTHING HE CAN TO MAKE YOU HAPPY. LOTS OF SELF LOATHING FOR PAPA BECAUSE HE DID A FUCKYWUCKY.

Eventually there's a moment where you ask why he's being nice, why he's doing this and he tells you he loves you and you call him a liar. He then admits his mistake and apologizes. He says he'll never do it again and will wait until the end of time for your forgiveness if necessary. Or if you never give it, he will wait forever even after the end of time. He is at your mercy.

You eventually warm up to him with hesitation, but you're cautious and always bracing yourself for the catch, for the bad things to happen again.

Papa continues doing his best to support you and be there for you and when he shows his dedication by being there for the birth of his baby and being there for you the entire time, you finally let him back in and offer him the first olive branch by asking him if he would like to hold his child for the first time.

[gemini-sensei]

Hear me out... (unedited)

Reader just broke up with her boyfriend. She's sad about it, yeah, mostly because she's been looking for "the one." All she's ever wanted was to marry the love of her life and have a family with them, but it's slowly starting to feel like that is impossible as everyone she's gone out with has either said she isn't their type or things don't end well. Case and point, her most recent ex who found someone else...

Reader feels a little hopeless. As her friends start to make families of their own, she feels even worse. She's there for them as they go through pregnancy and have their babies, being an aunt to their kids and a babysitter when her friends want to have a night out. She loves the little ones, but at the same time, she feels cheated out of the life she wanted for herself.

Hawk, her best friend, watches from the sidelines and doesn't know what to do. He takes her out in an attempt to forget about it, distracts her mind from it all. The one time they got drunk, she swore up and down about how her ex made so many empty promises to her and how upset she was when he left because she thought he was the one. Why couldn't he have been the one?

She cried in Hawk's arms before throwing up on the bar floor. After that, he decided that drinking wasn't the best distraction. So they did other things... like play video games and go sight seeing and practice karate.

Reader appreciates everything he does for her. He's the best and she always tells him as much.

It's when Yasmine is pregnant that she comes to a realization. Well, Moon helps her get there.

As the two women are leaving Yasmine and Demetri's home, Reader says something about how she can't wait to have all of this; the lush house, the loving partner, a baby on the way. It's not the first time they've talked about this.

"Why wait at all?" Moon asks.

Reader sighs. "I don't know. I'm still trying to find that special someone, you know?"

"They're not worth waiting on if you're ready for a baby," Moon tells her. It's quiet for a moment, Reader a little warm in the cheeks. "Reader, we all know how long you've wanted a family. Sometimes it's all you talk about. Just skip the search for someone and go for the baby. No one said you had to actually have a partner to have a baby."

Reader looks at her, a little stunned. She knew single women had babies all the time, through whatever means led them to that path in life, but she never considered it for herself. She blinks and licks her lips, smiling. "I'll have to think about it."

Moon giggles. "Definitely think it over."

And she does. Reader thinks about it for months before she comes to a decision.

The first person she tells is Hawk.

"I've decided I'm gonna have a baby," she tells him.

He laughs. "We all knew this about you."

"No, I mean soon. I'm gonna get pregnant soon and have a baby, Hawk." He looks at her questionably because he's known her plan all their lives: meet the person of her dreams first, then start a family. Sitting with her in his lonely apartment, he knows she's single as fuck. She knows he knows this and goes on to elaborate. "I'm tired of waiting for someone to love me enough to have a baby with me. I'm just gonna do it myself."

"Okay, but that's a lot more responsibility put on you," he says, concerned and only looking out for her best interest.

She nods. "I know. I've thought through all of it. I know what I'm doing."

He stares at her and sees how determined she is in this decision. Whether he thinks her doing this on her own isn't the best idea or not, he knows he won't be able to change her mind. "Okay. So are you gonna go to a sperm bank and tell them you want a donation?"

"No," she says and he almost chokes on air.

"What?"

"That's too expensive," she tells him. "I can spend that money on something a lot better. I mean, who knows how much I'd waste if it doesn't take the first or second or even third time, you know? I'm just gonna find a tinder hookup and go from there."

Now he puts his foot down in protest. "No. No way, Reader. For someone who's put a lot of thought into this, that is the worst way to go. I mean, you could meet someone dangerous or someone that you don't want to get you pregnant. Just save up for the clinic."

"I don't want to wait for that," she tells him, looking at him rather cross. But it's more out of desperation than being angry. "What other choice do I have?"

He says it before he thinks it through. "You have me."

She stares at him stunned. "What?"

He swallows hard but committs to it. "Reader, I don't want you getting hurt. I mean, all I want is for you to be happy. I'd do anything for you. I'd kill for you and you know that. So why not this?"

She sits silently and listens, then asks, "You'd really do this for me?"

"I'd do this with you," he tells her. He takes her hand and squeezes it. "Then you wouldn't have to do this alone and the kid can have both parents around."

She smiles.

"This is what best friends are for, right?"

She laughs and hugs him, nearly knocking him over. "You're the most amazing best friend ever!"

They hold each other for a moment longer than maybe what was necessary, then pull away from each other. He smiles at her a little cheeky.

"So, should I go get a turkey baster?"

He hits him on the arm. "Shut up! And no!" She sits shyly for a moment, cheeks growing hot. "That's another reason I didn't wanna use a clinic... I still want the have the whole... involved experience."

His eyes darken and he licks his lips. "Oh, I see."

He puts a hand on her thick thigh and squeezes it. She giggles nervously and puts her hand on his.

"Now isn't the time," she tells him, quickly explaining, "I'm not ovulating."

"We could still practice," he offers, wearing a cheeky smile.

She bites her lip and nods. "Yeah, a little practice wouldn't hurt."

They move to his bedroom, where their friendship takes on a whole new meaning. As he holds her pudgy waist and pounds her from behind, he silently hopes it takes some time for her to get pregnant because it's the best sex he's ever had. She moans and curls her fingers into the sheets, also wishing the same thing.

And even when they're cuddling in his sheets after their practice run, they're blind to the fact that this changes everything. But it does at least open up their hearts to the truth that's been there all along: they've been each other's meant to be for a long time. They just don't realize it yet, just like they haven't all these years they've been friends.

[kassymalone]

A Little Rant about Fun

Remember fun?

Remember when you could do things just because they were fun?

It keeps coming to mind recently, and it's starting to drive me nuts.

I've always done things with my hands - I used to do art before uni destroyed my love and confidence, I write things, I cross stitch, I make models, and I do these things because I enjoy them. Unfortunately I've come to hate talking to people about my hobbies because the almost always have the same response - 'what do you do with that?'

Do I sell on Etsy? No I fucking don't, this pattern took me 15 hours to finish, do you know how much I would have to charge for it?

Do I do freelance writing? No I fucking don't, why would I want a second soul-crushing job on top of my first soul-crushing job?

Why don't I actually get published instead of wasting my time with fanfiction so I can actually make some money off it? WHY DON'T YOU DO IT IF ITS SO FUCKING EASY

I've been thinking of making a quilt recently, with patches of all my favourite things, but I don't want to talk to anyone about it because I can already hear them asking 'and what are you going to do with it? Is this your practice one before you sell them? No, don't do it that way, that's the wrong way, no-one will like it!'

(Don't get me started on the 'you're doing it wrong' crowd, gatekeepers are a different rant.)

JUST LET ME DO THINGS. NOT EVERYTHING NEEDS TO MAKE MONEY. I know we're in a cost of living crisis right now, but I've been hearing this shit since I was a teenager, twenty fucking years ago! I still remember being talked out of singing lessons when I had a little extra money because 'what would I do with it?' Well fuck, my fat ass was never going to be the next Adele, but maybe I could have just had fun doing something I enjoy, but better?!

ON A RELATED NOTE!

You know what disproportionately annoys me? When people call the Nintendo Switch a 'toy' as if it's a bad thing. Like... yes? It's a toy? I play games on it?

'But the frame rate!', 'But the graphics!', 'But it can't run XX game!' WHO FUCKING CARES.

Yes, the xbox and playstation can connect to netflix and play blue rays and cook you dinner and raise your children, but they also cost a months rent and have all these bells and whistles to distract you from the fact that they JUST FUCKING TOYS. There's nothing either of them can do that I can't do on my PC, better and cheaper, and not have to turn on five different peripherals to make it work.

'But 4K!', 'But you can see the character follicles in this new game!', 'But the horses testicles react to the weather!'

Are you not having fun? Are you not enjoying playing your game? Never once have I been in the middle of a game and thought 'I'd be enjoying this more if it had more pixels.' I'm not even against other consoles, use whatever you prefer - if you like modern real-to life graphics then more power to you, but the amount of people who act like it actually matters somehow is concerning...

Yes, the switch hardware is behind what the xbox and playstation can do... but its a toy. Nintendo has never forgotten that it makes toys, and that's why I like it. It sits on my table, connects to my other monitor. I listen to long form youtube videos while I play TOTK. If I'm feeling sassy, I play it handheld.

My niece has one. We play Pokémon together and I let her win battles because the point is to be fun.

WHICH BRINGS ME BACK TO MY POINT!

FUCK the grindset 'but how can I monetise every possible second?' bullshit, FUCK the 'taking this thing that should be fun way too seriously' bullshit.

LET PEOPLE DO THINGS JUST BECUASE THEY'RE FUN.

LET THINGS THAT ARE SUPPOSED TO BE FUN BE FUN.

And now I've used the word 'fun' so much it's lost all meaning.

Much like fun itself.

[folksy]

when I was a depressed teenager I didn’t really watch movies or play video games and started reading books less which is something I really regret bc I feel I just wasted my time being chronically online or sleeping and brooding. when I could have been enriching my life more. you feel. I was really into music and twin peaks but I just felt things weren’t worth my time yet I was doing stuff that was less worth my time. which ironically the stuff I feel wasn’t worthwhile was stuff I was into a lot as kid (video games, reading, movies) so maybe that’s why I had that reaction as I was being the rebellious teen or whatever and growing out of things. I had an MP3 player and portable CD player as a kid but it wasn’t the same like where I had all these video games and movies. I didn’t go to my first concert until I was 16… and then on top of that teenage angst there was the depression just telling me nothing is worthwhile. I feel like I just missed out on a lot of stuff that I would’ve liked. anyway so I’m still super depressed in my twenties but this year thus far I’ve:

• watched 50+ movies, including finally watching stuff like parasite (I started it a few years ago but didn’t finish it), the terminator, spirited away, trainspotting, almost famous (a movie I was really interested in while in high school yet never actually watched), and in the mood for love

• finished some games that I had started like resident evil 5, as well as started and finished resident evil 2, 3, code veronica x, and 6 (had literally only did a little bit of the prologue and quit for a year lol but it wasn’t as bad as I was anticipating). I’ve been on a resident evil kick within the last year and a half to two years. I’ve played through 12 of them. wished I had gotten into them earlier as I feel they would’ve been great for me as a teen because I’ve always liked supernatural or spooky stuff (the same thing applies to horror movies- I wish I had gotten into them as a teen too) and the gamecube games I bought would’ve been cheaper lol

• read the stepford wives, fight club, brokeback mountain, american psycho, and red dragon. I read the last two both within a span of less than two weeks which is crazy to me as I haven’t been a big reader (of books) as an adult. I have nine books on hold on libby including giovanni’s room, the only good indians, and flowers in the attic

I know this was really long but if anyone has any recommendations or wants to talk about any of this stuff I’d love to…

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

reading update: January 2024

as long as I'm talking about The Gargoyle's Captive, let's discuss what else I've been reading this month.

Maeve Fly (CJ Leede, 2023) - I really liked this slender debut novel, which follows the titular Maeve Fly as she prowls LA like a homicidal alien, playing an unnamed ice princess in a certain theme park by day and indulging her murderous tendencies by night. Maeve is in a downward spiral; she's 27 years old and is preparing to lose her grandmother to illness and her only friend to a blossoming acting career. she sees no future for herself beyond losing the only two people she cares about and has no further goals, contenting herself with alcohol and porn while she rereads the same books, rewatches the same videos, and listens over and over to her playlist of Halloween music. Maeve is, it must be said, an abysmal loser, and I like her terrible melodrama a lot. I do think some of the hype is perhaps overstating the feminist credentials of this book; it sort of reminds me of when a college friend told me their favorite feminist movie was Suicide Squad (2016) because Harley Quinn was in it. Maeve talks a lot of big game about how women are always expected to have some tragedy to be deranged serial killers, while men are allowed to just do it, but it hit me as a little tryhard. there are a lot of books trying to be "the female American Psycho" right now - Eliza Clark's 2020 novel Boy Parts is frequently described as such - but it feels a bit too on the nose when Maeve's ultimate climactic rampage is directly inspired by a glimpse of the American Psycho novel. it's not that deep, but it is a gross, captivating read told from a fascinatingly cracked POV. check out Maeve Fly.

Laziness Does Not Exist (Devon Price, 2021) - yeah Devon Price is still following me (though my days are numbered, I'm sure) so it's a massive relief to say that I did like this book. Price has sort of become my self-help ride or die, mainly because a.) he's so much more self-aware than the average self-help writer that it feels kind of insulting to call him one and b.) he's actually dealing with topics that are relevant or interesting and providing actionable advice. while LDNE didn't engross me quite as hard as Unmasking Autism (while I am, famously, not autistic, I do believe in their beliefs, by which I mean I'm the token allistic among my close friends and I vastly prefer autistic company) it hit me hard in several unexpected pressure points. I'll happily admit that I can't relate to Price's interviewees who willingly work 50+ hours a week for jobs that hate them and are destroying their minds and bodies, but I still struggle to escape the perpetual sensation that a moment at rest is a moment wasted. It probably didn't help that I was reading this book while on vacation at my mother's, where I visited the beach almost daily and was so work-averse that we didn't even bother going grocery shopping because I didn't want to cook. and yet, despite getting dummy chill in some aspects of my life, I am still constantly possessed by a malevolent ghost insisting that I'm wasting my time and have never actually done Enough. maybe Price's next book, Unlearning Shame, will finally fix me; it's out in four days and god knows I'll be getting my hands on it as soon as humanly possible.

Patternmaster (Octavia E. Butler, 1976) - y'all know I love a messy political fantasy, and this is just... god, the absolute messiest. I thought Mind of My Mind was bad, but it turns out Mary's descendants are going to full-on reinvent feudalism with psychic powers, treating non-psychics as chattel and causing technological advancement to regress since they refuse to handle their problems with anything but psychic powers. and it's even got two brothers duking it out for the throne that will give them power over every bitchy psychic on earth! you love to see it. if I can be 100% honest I do think it's straight up bananagrams that this was the first book released in the series even though it's chronologically last; I genuinely cannot imagine caring enough to figure out what the fuck these people were talking about if I didn't have the previous four books for context. and even "context" may be generous; Octavia still has absolutely 0 interest in explaining what's up with the fucking outer space werewolves who are the psychics' #1 enemy. if I could have brunch with any person living or dead I would summon Butler up in a heartbeat to explain what the fuck her thought process was in plotting out this series over some mimosas, and I would take extensive notes on every word she said. an absolute genius and the uncontested queen of freak shit forever.

Thirsty Mermaids (Kat Leyh, 2021) - I purchased this graphic novel in November 2023 at a conference where I bumped into Queer Comics Peddler, my very favorite queer midwestern pop-up. running into them is always a delight, and this time I came with a question: could they give me a recommendation? the very nice people working offered up Thirsty Mermaids, which was the PERFECT companion for a long airplane ride. it's cute without being overly sappy, and avoids the trap of sacrificing a plot for the sake of checking off as many representation boxes as possible. the story is simple: three mermaids use a spell to turn into humans and go ashore in search of booze, only to realize in the morning that they don't know how to turn back. taken in by a generous bartender, they're faced with the reality of having to make money for the first time in their lives. hijinks ensue, but also a very sweet and warmhearted story about the friends looking out for one another as they try to figure out exactly where they belong and what home even means. also the artwork is GORGEOUS, with the mermaids' extremely memorable character designs being a real standout. if you're a graphic novel enthusiast, definitely check this out 🧜‍♀️

Sugar, Baby (Celine Saintclare, 2023) - Sugar, Baby came to me in a very similar way as Thirsty Mermaids: while visiting a witchy little bookstore that I was immediately charmed by, I asked the cashier what they would recommend. they offered up Maeve Fly (fab) and this novel, a stack of which was on the counter advertising an upcoming event with the author. neither have disappointed, so shout out to that one employee with the great taste! Sugar, Baby sees a young cleaner named Agnes, one of the only biracial women in her unnamed English town, befriending the daughter of a wealthy client and getting whisked away to her new friend's London lifestyle: crashing in an apartment with fellow models, staying out all night to party, and making money by going on dates with extravagantly wealthy older men. Agnes starts out having a swell time, but the cracks pretty swiftly start to form as she realizes how much more dependent she is on these men than her wealthy new friends and she begins to wonder exactly how much she's willing to diminish herself to get the bag. it's not a perfect first novel but it is a compelling one, a perfect airplane page-turner that crashes from glitzy to ghoulish and back with breakneck speed.

The Gargoyle's Captive (Katee Robert, 2023) - my full review is over on patreon for my darling supporters who want me dead (and picked this book in the first place, damn them to hell), but suffice to say this is a fun book to read if you like the sensation of your brain melting out of your nose, if you're really turned on by baby's first bdsm, you are not particularly concerned with trifling matters like "plot coherence" or "character motivation" or "writing that is complex and artful," and/or you've ever wanted to have sex with a dude whose penis is so big that you feel genuinely fear. also, hey, I forgot to include this in my patreon write-up so fuck it: Robert REFUSES to tell us what kind of food the protagonists are eating, ever. whenever they have a meal it's just "the food was placed on the table" "I took a bite" etc. drop me a HINT, man, come on! is it a protein? grain? starches? the only thing I know for sure that they're consuming is wine and a single marshmallow, and god does it show. it's just a very weird and distracting omission and it's absolutely not the worst thing about this book but it is a hill I'm willing to die complaining on.

[loopingpyre]

Yeah, fair enough on the needing more detail point, I sort of wanted to test the waters to see if you'd even care first, cause I wasn't gonna waste time typing out a whole thing if the notion of JRPGs being fundamentally flawed didn't interest you and then you deleted my ask. So I guess I'll now oblige and explain in more detail.

I've been playing a few of the SMT games because my girlfriend really likes them and I, being a good girlfriend (trying to!) want to show that I care about her interests. Prior to this I've only really played Persona 3 and 5 and Yakuza 7. For this, I played Soul Hackers 2, and Devil Survivor 1 and 2 (1 to Yuzu's ending, and 2 to Ronaldo's ending), and about an hour of SMT V, which I found boring, and she, having played the whole game (I'm pretty sure) agrees with me that it's boring, so I decided to not keep playing it (for now at least)

My main issue with most all of these games comes mostly threefold: the amount of time and commitment they take, the difficulty and in particular the manner in which it is imposed, and the heavily formulaic nature of their plots. These are sort of holistic issues, I guess, so I can't really neatly divide them, but I'll try.

First of all: the time commitment. Playing both Devil Survivors to a single ending took me around thirty to forty hours each, going off of my save files. (I was playing the 3DS versions, mind, and listening to all the voice acting, which surely extended the time played.) I understand that it gets faster on NG+, and in itself, this isn't exactly the biggest of deals, because video games in general take a long time (it's the way it is really), but JRPGs just feel like they take way longer than the average video game and this issue compounds when one considers the latter two flaws I've observed.

So, secondarily: The difficulty, and the way it's imposed. Soul Hackers 2 obviously is not a hard game, and there's not that much variance in its content, and it's not the longest of these sorts of games, either, so I wouldn't say it's the greatest offender here (using that term feels wrong...), but with Devil Survivor 1, I felt this the most. About 80 percent of the way through the game, which I'd generally found to be quite unchallenging for the most part, I found myself suddenly struggling against Belial (the fire demon). During a grinding session in which I was trying to level myself up so that I could weather my way through this (to my annoyance, as I found the grinding incessantly tedious, more on that later), my girlfriend looked over my shoulder, and said "why do your stats look like that?"

You see, my stats, at the time, all four, magic, vitality, agility, and uh... What was the fourth one. Strength! Yeah, um they were *all* at exactly 17 (give or take 1.) I explained to her, rather calmly, that I had done this because I couldn't really choose which of the four stats I wanted more of, and thought it would be best if I made all of these numbers perfectly balanced and equal.

This is an approach I almost always take in most any video game that offers any form of upgrade or skill tree: I struggle with overchoice, can't choose a priority to go for, so every time I have resources with which to upgrade, I just upgrade whatever is most recently neglected such that I have a generally well-rounded skill set and can do a bit of everything.

She, an SMT veteran, immediately went like, "NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO "

And explained to me that the way I was *supposed* to do this, was to specialize in one area or another, magic or strength or tanking damage with high health, or whatever. To which I said "HOW THE FUCK WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT!" She insisted I should have just known it, I guess? Anyway, I considered this a grievous design flaw that irreparably impaired my enjoyment of the game. As I did not have an old save file with which to revert my statting decisions, and did not wanted to restart the entire game, nor did I want to grind the same fucking goddamned shibuya battle over and over and over and over and over again for god knows how many hours until I somehow corrected my stats

I opted to use my (hacked) 3DS to install an external cheat which inflated my protagonist's level to 99 with all four stats at their maximum of 40. I did this because I had decided I hated how this game was balanced and wanted to finish it and no longer waste my time. I felt pleased with this decision, because I was playing through the bad ending in which the cast brute forces their way out of the lockdown and ruining the world, while myself brute forcing my way out of the game and ruining the game balance. *ahem* I mean, fixing the game balance

My girlfriend said "I'm glad you had fun ruining one of my favorite games :(((" In response, I opined that Devil Survivor would have been better if it were a straightforward visual novel.

While Soul Hackers 2 does not have this specific issue, given that Ringo's stats are all mostly preset by the game and you can only mildly boost them here and there, I did instead take umbrage with the way that the later floors of the Soul Matrix dungeon were organized around teleporters which teleport you from one island of the floor to another, with no clear sense of rhyme or reason to their routing. I considered these teleporters to be arbitrary and stupid, as they were frustrating, and demanded that I have the capacity for rote memorization of the layout and teleporter placement of an entire dungeon whose corners broadly look all the damn same. I called these a blatantly egregious example of "fake difficulty".

She warned me never to touch several of the older SMT games.

I booted up Devil Survivor 2, with my girlfriend's advice about specialization in mind. I enjoyed the game a lot more than Devil Survivor 1, but, for the sake of mitigating gameplay frustration, I pirated the DLC. I quickly realized I would not enjoy the grinding, even with the reduction of grinding that the DLC enables, and cheated to have infinite money so I could have more fun with the game. I went for Ronaldo's ending, because he's sort of a leftist and his voice acting makes him sound like Knuckles the Echidna from Sonic the Hedgehog, and I thought siding with "communist Knuckles the Echidna" was a very funny image

Anyway, across all three of these experiences, I generally wondered, "do I like these? do I like their stories? do I like their gameplay?" and I feel like the answer is broadly sort of... yes, sometimes, but generally no?

I kinda just don't really understand the appeal of being railroaded into repetitive tasks for the sake of increasing numbers that then decide whether or not you win, rather than like, your actual skill, which is just down to pressing the same buttons over and over. I get that part of the appeal is the long-term strategy of building your party, and that's valid and all, but I tend to very quickly get frustrated with it because often times I fail to intuit the correct strategy ahead of time, and the solution turns out to be "rewind the clock back several hours!" and I don't want to do that and have to redo all the work I did up to that point, and then potentially have to rewind again if I do it wrong.

So, the appeal is supposed to be the strategy, I guess, which just takes a lot of dedication that I don't have in me, but if I dial that down to make it easier, then the game's reduced to pressing more buttons, and, just isn't really fun at all in the way it's supposed to be. And that all might be fine if the story was worth the effort, but... is it?

All of these games have very thin narratives which all more or less boil down to "humanity good" vs "humanity bad" vs "humanity bad but sometimes good so it's worth it (sometimes)" ideological conflicts that all end up with killing one or another divine or cosmic entity with omnipotence of one or another variety, and like, cool, I guess, is that worth 50-100 hours of effort? Is that something I'm invested enough in to throw myself into an entire series, hell, an entire genre, of games for? I'm not really sure that it is, to me, so. Weh?

Is that really all that there is to this entire game genre? Like, outside of indie games that mostly have their own issues (they're all very derivatively ripping off Mother 3 and/or Undertale and/or Chrono Trigger and not generally bringing a lot of new mechanical ideas, and even still they just kinda find their way back to the issue of the grind not being that fun most of the time)

And my girlfriend has just argued to most of this that maybe I just don't like the games, and I shouldn't force myself to like them, and she'd like to please stop rehashing this argument with me, and maybe she's right, maybe I just don't enjoy JRPGs, and that's okay, but uh...

I don't know. I want to try and see what she sees in them and find out if I can really care about them the way she does. She has a Jack Frost plushie that I sometimes play with, and it's cute, and I want to care about him more the way she does, not just because he's cute but because I've played these games and had fun and know who he is and definitely don't hate his stupid little face aaahh I love him so much

and I keep inventing fun little lore for Frosty the Jack Frost plushie (she calls him Frosty) about how he sells stuff he stole to the Black Market which is owned by Black Frost, and he's planning to kill King Frost and overthrow the Frost Monarchy, and all that, and she seems to find that cute even though she keeps contradicting it with lore and trivia from the games and I keep going "well I dunno *in the back of my mind: but maybe I want to know*" and like

I'm sorry if this seems like an insane unhinged rant but I just really love my girlfriend and I think it'd hurt a little to have to give up on something she really loves, even if I know, intellectually, that she loves me more, and that that won't change if I don't like SMT, and it's okay if I don't like them.

But I want to like them. I genuinely do. I don't know how to like them and I don't know how to tell her I want to like them and am not trying to start a fight with her over something she loves. I don't know. Am I missing something?

for the record I kind of like a lot of things Soul Hackers 2 does and I think I'd like it a lot more if it was finished but that's a can of worms I maybe shouldn't open....

Holy shit this is so much and thank you so much also for caring enough for my opinion because i have a whole lot to say here, and I adore these games.

Let's break it down point by point.

Belial is fairly challenging, the game is hard. And I think your girlfriend has done you a severe disservice. If she wanted you to min-max your stats in a certain direction, she should have told you about that straight up. I can understand her immediate reaction due to it being uncommon, but how is that your fault? The game is actually designed for it anyway.

You're given party members that focus on different niches, Yuzu and Midori and Keisuke can all perform powerful magic offensive roles, Atsuro is a strong tank, Kaido has powerful offensive stats, and you share a skill pool, so having a less specialised build is really only going to make it that much harder if you try to make your protag the main attacker, which some SMT vets seem to instinctively do in these games. Having a mix means you could play the healer, carry an extra element or phys attack or status condition to cripple a foe.

I personally would have leant towards a code that lets you boost levels faster, but I think her response to cheating was unreasonable. I think the game is balanced well even if you make an even spread but you're trying to have fun and try her thing. Kind of rude to you really, because sometimes you just need to cheat, these games are HARD. Remember that escort mission earlier on? Kind of needlessly tricky.

There's a reason that new versions of these releases have additional easy modes. In some of their PS2 game promotion, Atlus PR famously said 'we get off on your tears'. That mentality has somewhat changed since. Whilst some, like I, say that the difficulty is kind of part of the point, there's only so much you should have to put up with. I actively reccommend cheats in some games as a way to ease you in, when they are so challenging.

(Were you playing the DS version? The Yuzu ending certainly isnt a 'bad ending' on 3ds. The 8th day makes it one of my fave endings. Trying to complete every ending is a fool's endeavor in my opinion, and you should only lean towards what you think is best. Maybe look up an ending guide on the offchance the cool ending you want is hidden in some way so you never have to touch the game again unless you actually want to. The point is about you making Your Choice.)

Moving along, Ronnie my beloved. Love that guy, his route is easily the best. I love Soul Hackers 2 despite it's frustratingly flaws of 'they ripped half the game out and sold it as day 1 dlc' and 'the fucking soul matrix', and a lot of people just dismiss it out of hand based on early dungeon design and miss out on the way it deals with it's cast. Im so glad you can SEE IT.

Within many Shin Megami Tensei games, the stat grinding difficulty is the point insofar as you are fighting a world that is falling apart and wants you dead. And even so, you keep fighting and surviving. These titles can be rather samey as they go over their various aspects of humanity over and over, but thus can they really be made a representative of the JRPG genre? What about Pokemon, which is about adventuring and bonding with your creatures? SMT has a distinct theme they stick to that they repackage in different flavours. Fuck it, play old ones and cheat in them. Load up on macca and buy a gazillion healing items to cut down the grind and overall playtime.

I've noticed a distinct absence of the Persona games too? Which is strange given how they all differ from traditional smt in terms of theming.

My favourite RPGs are 'The World Ends With You' and 'The Caligula Effect 2'. Entirely different from SMT and dont focus on 'humanity' in that way at all and they absolutely aren't representative of more mainstream JRPGs.

(sidenote, what are your favourite RPGs out of curiosity? I can probably help you hunt down some specific titles that you would like more?)

I adore your Jack Frost lore. Why can't that work in canon? Little fairy friend SHOULD overthrow the frost monarchy!

(and that sort of stuff is encouraged in Atlus' other series Etrian Odyssey, which is a dungeon crawler where you make a team of customised guys (you can start anywhere).

I think the only thing you can really do is play more, but i dont think you should push yourself either or you could burn out and appreciate it less. I'm sorry that I don't have magical advice that will solve that conundrum.

Thank you so much for coming to me though, it means a lot and I hope this ramble does anything for you. Im trying to check on my phone that I covered everything in your post and Im so sorry if I missed anything (please point it out if so).

Best of luck?

[lovetowee]

KRISTEN - PART I

By: MrMister

It was a hot day in the summer. I didn’t have to be at work, and College was finished until the Fall. The day was mine. So I picked up my phone and gave my friend a call. She picked up on the third ring.

“Hey Jack,” she answered, her voice was cute and she always sounded happy and bubbly. “Isn’t it a bit early to be calling?” she continued with a yawn.

“Last I checked, 8am is regular people time,” I said with a chuckle. “It’s Friday and I have nothing to do.”

“So,” she said.

“So,” I responded, “the day is wasting. Come over and play some video games. We can game all day.” There was silence as I could almost hear her thinking: stay in bed, or get dressed?

“I’ll make tacos for dinner?” I offered.

“Well why didn’t you lead with that,” she said, finally deciding. She was a taco fiend. “Alright I’ll be there in an hour. I’m going to shower then I’ll hop on a bus.”

“Alright, Kristen,” I answered smiling, “see you then.” I hung up the phone and headed to the kitchen to make some sort of breakfast.

Kristen has been my best friend since I could remember. We had grown up together in the same small neighborhood. I was twenty-four and she was twenty-one. I had moved away to College about three years ago. I had found an apartment and had begun renting in the city. I was quite happy to be away from my small town. Kristen followed me to the same College, when she finished High School. The only difference is I was studying Psychology, and she was studying to be a Civil Engineer. It was nice living so close to her, at least she was a familiar face.

I opened my freezer and grabber the opened box of waffles. I opened the packaging and took two waffles out, popping them into the toaster. I placed the box back in the freezer shutting the door firmly. Kristen was only half an hour away by bus, so we spent a lot of our free time together. We usually hung out at my apartment because it was bigger, and she lived on Campus and had roommates. She was my best friend, and I secretly had a crush on her. Our simple friendship, over the last few years had grown into something more – at least for me. I didn’t want to jeopardize our friendship, so I never had the courage to take the next step. And of late it was getting harder to resist the urge. I was beginning to notice things about her that I never really cared for before: her smell, how she dressed, her hair in the sunlight; my heart started to race whenever we hung out.

The toaster popped snapping me out of my deep thoughts. I took them out and put them on a plate. I spread some butter, and drizzled some syrup and sat down to eat. What a great, healthy breakfast, I thought to myself as my mind drifted back to Kristen. What made things even harder was that we didn’t have many boundaries in our relationship. We had been together since we were younger, since before the difference between boys and girls had been apparent. There wasn’t much we hadn’t seen, or kept hidden from each other. Things like after showering she would walk around naked. She would burp and fart around me, which she never did around her other girlfriends. It was getting harder to hide my feelings, and to hide… other things… when she was being herself around me. It was like we were already dating. So, I wasn’t sure why I was afraid to try advancing our relationship to the next level.

I finished my crunchy waffles in silence enjoying how the morning sunlight shone through my kitchen window. I put the plate in the sink, and headed to the washroom to take a shower. I turned on the faucet and let the water heat up. I remembered the last time Kristen had been here, we were in a hurry to catch a movie together so we decided to hop in the shower at the same time. It’s not like it was the first time I had seen her naked… but in the warm, her skin glistening she was gorgeous. I remember smelling her as I helped wash her back. As I had turned and she washed my back I wasn’t sure how I kept my boner hidden, but if she saw she had not reacted. Just seeing her skin all wet as it went down to the ultimate smoothness between her legs…

I caught myself and looked down, erect again. I could hear the shower roaring as my mind cleared and reality set in. I just looked down at my throbbing nakedness, as my mind kept trying to drift back to Kristen.

“Ah Fuck it!” I said aloud. Might as well jerk off now, maybe it would keep my mind on the right path when Kristen arrived. I wrapped my hand around the shaft of my penis. I allowed my mind to return to the shower scene, as my hand moved back and forth.

We were wet in the shower, and she turned to face me. One hand was raised to her small wet breasts, teasing them. The other hand slowly arrived at the smooth, wet lips between her legs. She played with herself, a soft moan escaping her lips.

I stroked harder, and harder.

Her body got into the motion, thrusting, thirty for her eager fingers. She was whimpering now as her fingers were deep inside her.

My hand was moving with a mind of its own.

Her body was trembling as she was practically screaming. Her hands were so deep inside that…

Explosions! I came in my hand, panting like an animal. Oh my God, I thought, that felt amazing. Once the pleasure started to leave my body I stepped into the shower, dumping my semen on the shower floor to wash away.

My shower was uneventful now that my mind was clear. It was a double-edged sword being a guy. I could be revving my engine at 110, like before the shower. As soon as I cum, the desire flies out the window. At least I wouldn’t have to worry about being horny when she arrived. We could just play our games, and have some tacos later. We knew everything about each other. Well almost everything. There was something Kristen didn’t know about me. I kind of wanted her to find out, I just wasn’t sure if she would look at me the same afterwards.

Suddenly the door buzzer went off, jarring me from my thoughts. I quickly finished getting dressed, then headed to the front door. I already knew who it was. I didn’t have many local friends besides Kristen.

“It is so hot already,” she whined, wiping sweat from her forehead. “It’s barely after nine o’clock. By noon it’s going it be a sauna.” She was amazing standing there in the golden sunlight. Little droplets of sweat glistened, giving her skin a beautiful sheen. She was only 5’5”, so she was fairly tiny. Her body was small, even though she was twenty-one going on twenty-two, she appeared younger. Her tiny little breasts made themselves known under a sweat dampened white tank top. I could just make out the pinkness of her bra underneath. She wore a pair of black Lulu Lemons that were skin tight. I could just make out the mound of her vagina standing out against the skinniness of her legs. Her hair was short-cropped, almost boyish, and she had the bluest eyes.

“Can I come in, Mr. Door Guard?” she pushed past me. “Give me some of that AC. Oh God, yes!”I closed the door as she fiddles with the thermostat, further lowering the temperature. I noticed that her pants did a really good job of showing off her cute little butt cheeks. “I’m so excited, come on,” she said hopping up and down, “the day is wasting like you said.”

“Alright, alright, settle down. We’ll get to it.”

“I can feel it. Today we’re going to make some good progress.” She was referring to the game we had started together one of the last times she was over. The game was, ‘The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom’. We were both huge Zelda fans, and when this game came out I couldn’t pass up an opportunity to explore it with her.

She walked over to the TV and started turning everything on that we needed. When that was all done she made her way over to the couch. I moved and sat down beside her. She offered me the controller when the game was loaded. Press A, flashed in front of me.

“No, you can start,” I said. She eagerly pressed start and loaded up our file. As I watched her play I noticed how nice she smelled. It wasn’t a strong female smell. She wasn’t mature enough for perfume yet. Instead, it was a nice girl smell: freshly showered, with a light lavender deodorant after thought. She was so cute, smiling like a goof playing the game. My heart was mush in my chest.

The morning went as casual as it always did. We took turns back and forth, exploring anything new we came across. If she was stuck on anything I helped her out. She clearly enjoyed the game more than me, but I seemed to be more skilled. It was around 11:30 that I decided it was time to get our responsibilities out of the way.

“Hey, we should pop down to the store soon if you want tacos,” I explained. “I have to pick up a few ingredients I’m missing. Plus we can pick something out to have for lunch together, I don’t have much here.” As if on cue her stomach grumbled, “and it sounds like you could eat,” I laughed.

“Shut up,” she said, her cheeks coloring in slight embarrassment, “I didn’t have breakfast. Are you sure I cannot just stay here in the AC?”

“No,” I responded, “you need to work for your food. It’s only ten minutes away, it won’t take that long. Come keep me company.”

“Please, can’t I stay?” she begged her eyes all big and wet, her lips in a theatrical pout.

“It won’t be so bad! Plus you can pick what we have for lunch.”

“Okay,” she said in mock sadness. She paused the game and stood up, stretching her arms to the ceiling. Her cute little tummy bulged as she arched her back. “I’m going to run to the washroom, want to grab me a water bottle for the walk?”

“Of course,” I winked as she headed away. The bathroom was fairly close to the kitchen, I followed her heading to the fridge as she closed the door to the bathroom. I closed the fridge door after grabbing a water from the back. Through the bathroom door I could hear the sound of Kristen peeing. The spray, splashing sound that girl’s made as they went. My mind drifted to her sweet vagina lips, dripping with that warm golden piss…

I shook my head disrupting my sick thoughts before I could pitch a tent down below. Still, my mind wandered, I bet from a girl as cute as Kristen, her pee tasted sweet. Quickly, I moved out of the kitchen and waited by the front door, hoping to keep my mind out of the gutter. She was peeing, liquid waste, why was it exciting me?

The toilet flushed, hands were washed, and then the door flew open. As she came out the kitchen I threw the water bottle at her, gently. She caught it awkwardly with a, “Hey!” I laughed and put my shoes on. She came over and slipped on her flip-slops.

“Come on, Kiddo,” I held the door for her and soon we were both off, sweating in the hot July weather. “You were absolutely right, it is too hot out today.”

“I told you, that’s why I wanted to stay in the AC!”

“Well we can head back if you’d like,” I joked, “just there will be no tacos then.”

She grabbed my hand and started to swing it back and forth dramatically. “In Mexico it is always this hot. And they eat tacos all the time. If they can do it, so can we,” she explained. The heat made the ten minute walk feel so much longer than it was. But soon we arrived at the air conditioned grocery store. We went around and I grabbed the things I was missing in order to make tacos: salsa, lettuce, and tortillas. Now it was time to solve the problem of lunch.

“So Kristen, what should we do for lunch? Pick anything you want.”

“Anything?” she asked, her eyes shining brightly.

“Yes, whatever you want. Go grab it.” Off she went. I stood by the checkout line waiting for her to return. Soon she returned holding a little blue box.

“KD, for real?” she nodded her head eagerly. “You can have anything for lunch and you choose Kraft Dinner?” She was such a child some times. But I shrugged and took it from her. She clapped happily as we entered the checkout line. I paid for everything then we made our way back through the head to my refreshing apartment. As soon as I got the door open we both rushed in and collapsed on the couch, deeply breathing in the cool air.

“Now that we’ve cooled off why don’t you resume the game,” I suggested, “and I will start making lunch?” She nodded in agreement and we did just that. I got the water boiling. I then added the noodles once the water was sufficiently heated. I could hear Kristen yelling at the TV from the other room, she must be stuck on a hard enemy, I thought. “You okay in there?” I asked, stirring the noodles.

“Yeah I just have to –” I didn’t catch the end of what she said, but she was having fun and that’s all that mattered. I finished off lunch and spooned it into two spate bowls of equal size. “Ketchup?”I yelled to the other room.

“Yes!” Which I knew was coming. She always had some ketchup on her Kraft Dinner. I squirted some onto her bowl with a loud ketchup fart, and then returned the bottle to the fridge. I picked up the bowls and walked over to her, handing her the one with red on top.

“Thank you,” she said mixing her KD happily. She paused the game and set the controller on the floor. “Want to watch something while we eat?”

“Yes, that sounds nice,” I grabbed the remote and changed the input.

Netflix came up on the screen. I put on a random show that we both enjoyed and we ate in silence, enjoying the cartoons. She moaned after her first bite, “Jack, KD is the best. But it’s even better when you make it.” She spooned more into her waiting mouth.

“I just follow the instructions,” I explained, “I don’t do anything special.”

“Well whatever you do, just make KD for me forever.” We continued to watch TV chatting lightly back and forth. About halfway I got up and grabbed us each something to drink. Lunch was fairly uneventful, and now that I had let Kristen play for most of the morning, it was my turn and I really wanted to sink my teeth into it.

Kristen liked watching as much as she liked playing. So we explored and had fun discovering new things. As I played more and more, she was becoming quieter which was weird. Kristen was always energetic, and easily excitable. I didn’t put too much thought into it though, maybe she was just lost in the game, I know I was. Then I started to notice a light smell of eggs. As I continued to play I kept noticing the smell, stronger. “Kristen, did you fart?” I asked playfully, we didn’t hide anything from each other.

Her cheeks burned a little red, she responded a little strained, “Yes I’m sorry, my tummy really hurts. I’m not sure the KD is agreeing with me.”

“No worries, I was just curious. Didn’t mean to pry,” and I focused back on the bright graphics of the game. I offered her the controller in the hopes that maybe it would take her mind off her upset stomach. But while playing her hand kept drifting to her midsection, and I could smell the stink of her farts. Soon she stopped playing all together and was groaning a bit.

“You okay, Kristen?”

“Yeah,” she said looking at me. “It just doesn’t feel great.”

“Do you maybe have to use the washroom?”

“No, I don’t feel like it would come out yet. Plus,” she looked longingly at the TV, “I want to keep playing, we’re almost at the next dungeon.”

“But you’re in pain, I feel bad.”

“Maybe it will pass,” she let out another stinky little fart.

I don’t know why my brain went where it did, but I took a chance. A chance I didn’t know I even wanted to take. It just sort of came out. “Why don’t you just sit here and keep playing?”

“That’s what I’m going to do,” she responded, rubbing her tummy again.

“No, no,” I started, she didn’t understand my meaning. I’m not even sure I knew what I wanted, but I continued, “You’re in pain and you need relief. So just sit here and keep playing the game and keep… trying to go,” I trailed off a bit at the end, my face felt hot.

She paused the game and looked at me her cheeks a hot scarlet. “You want me to,” she stumbled on her words a bit, “go, in my pants?” I nodded, doing my best to keep looking her in the eyes, although I just wanted to hide in shame. “I’m twenty-one I haven’t had an accident since I was a baby.”

“I just meant that you’re enjoying the game and if your stomach won’t let you go, why wait around and play Toilet Tag?” She sat quiet for a bit. I bet she was going to tell me how absolutely disgusting I was.

Truth be told, I had always had these fantasies. Fantasies that when it came to Kristen I desired even more than I knew I needed. I had imagined her peeing in front of me, or pooping in her pants; or even persuading her to let me put her cute little body into a pair of Pampers. I just wanted to change her. I wanted to take care of her, love her, and quite frankly: fill her with my cum.

So the silence dragged for a bit as I waited for her to tell me off. All she asked, breaking the silence, was, “What about my clothes, and what about the… cleanup?” I was shocked she seemed to be considering it.

“Leave it all to me. I can wash your clothes,” I assured her, my hopes desperate. “I will clean up any mess you make. I’ll take care of you. I just want you to be okay.”

“So if I,” she swallowed nervously, “if I crap myself, you will clean me up?” She looked me in the eyes and looked more vulnerable than I’ve ever seen her.

“Of course,” I said touching her arm reassuringly. “I just want you to be happy. I think this would be kind of fun.” She turned away and unpaused the game.

“I’m not saying I’m going, but we’ll see how I feel,” she sounded more like her normal self as our video game adventure resumed its normal course. I was okay with a maybe. At least we had talked about it and she didn’t seem too turned off. I tried to focus on the game and not on my erection pressing painfully against the material of my shorts. Recent events and the smells of her occasional farts were turning me on and making it hard to concentrate.

For a bit we just focused on the game. We took more frequent turns so she could relax her stomach. I started to notice her body language out of the corner of my eye. She seemed to be pushing and straining more actively. I was getting super excited, the possibilities inching their way a little more towards becoming real. I tried to give her the controller as often as I could. This allowed me to watch her a little more carefully. She was really trying to go in her pants, I was shocked! I thought I had no chance. I could tell though she was still trying to hide the fact that she was trying to poop her pants, like she didn’t want me to know. Who knows, maybe once she got up the urge to go she would change her mind and just head to the washroom like an adult. The smell of farts had died down, and her hands didn’t touch her belly all that much. I was worried, but relieved, that maybe the cramps had passed her. But despite all this her straining was getting more obvious like she wasn’t trying to hide it as much.

“You doing okay?” I risked asking.

“Yeah,” she mumbled, “feeling a little better.” And I left it at that. She seemed to get quiet and lost in the game. She gave a little push, this time I could hear a loud fart erupt from between her butt cheeks. She quickly handed the controller to me and her hands went to her stomach. “Your turn,” she said. I played not focused on the game, I just watched her out of the corner of my eye.

She pushed again and moaned, “Oh no.” I heard her stomach gurgle a bit. She closed her eyes and gave another little push. “Oh!” she exclaimed her eyes opening, still pushing. “I’m going in my pants,” she mumbled. I could hear wet noises coming from her butt. She stopped for a bit as I began to smell the aroma of her mess. “I just pooped in my pants a bit. I just crapped myself,” she laughed nervously and brushed her hair behind her ears.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” she said, “I just have to go more.” She closed her eyes and started to push more. More came out of her as she moaned in relief, her but making bubbly farting sound as she sat beside me filling her pants. As she finished up she lifted her butt slightly off the couch to allow the last of the mess to slide in. She let out a breath and said, “I cannot believe I just shit myself like a toddler.”

“It wasn’t so bad, right?”

“No, it wasn’t,” said while pausing the game. She put the controller down. “And I feel a lot better. How much of a mess did I make?” She stood up and showed me her behind. Her once tight pants now had a noticeable bulge in the back. I really wanted to touch it.

“You did a real good job,” I laughed.

“It feels a little gross and the smell…”

“I don’t mind,” I said quickly. “It’s kind of hot. My little stinker.”

“You like this smell?”

“Well,” I explained, still staring at the bulge in her pants. “I don’t know how to explain it. It’s just kind of sexy. It does stink, but it’s also an exciting stink.”

“I feel relieved. My tummy was really hurting.”

“You you really had to go.”

“I would like to play a little more before you change me,” she said mischievously. She turned to look me in the eyes. “I also kind of have to pee, can I…?”

“Yeah!” I said eagerly. “You want to pee your pants too? Let me just get a towel quick.” She nodded and I headed to the bathroom. I grabbed a towel and quickly headed back.

“You enjoy this, I see,” she said with a giggle. She was pointing at my very obvious erection as I re-entered the room. Now it was my turn for my cheeks to flush red. I said nothing and laid the towel at her feet. She stepped on it and I stood back and waited.

“You’re going to just stand there and watch me, you Perv,” she said closing her eyes. She was trying to concentrate, I guessed.

“It’s just not every day I get to witness something so… hot,” I stammered. Kristen had me all flustered; my mind was going a mile a minute. We stood in silence for a bit, the hum of the TV the only sound. I just watched and listened, not wanting to miss a moment.

Then the show started slowly. It was hard to make out the wet spot as it started to form since her pants were black. I could hear a light noise like a hiss coming from her legs. Then as the dark spot started being more noticeable the sound became louder and more obvious. As her adult bladder emptied itself the wetness trickled down her slender legs into the towel below. She moaned softly in relief as the hissing sound slowly died down. Her hand subconsciously drifted to her damp crotch and started to gently massage.

“Feel better?”

“Have you always like this sort of thing?” she asked ignoring my question.

“Yes, it is a very big turn on for me,” I responded my cheeks burning.

“All these years I’ve known you and you never wanted to tell me?”

“I thought you’d find me gross. Or that you’d tell someone and I’d get in trouble..”

“That’s too bad,” she responded smiling. “Peeing myself really turns me on too. Maybe we could have had a little fun over the years.” She moved over to the couch and gingerly sat down. She gasped slightly as she sat on her poopy bum. “It feels so nice and warm,” she giggled wiggling slightly back and forth, moving her mess around. “Let’s continue gaming for a bit my tummy is starting to feel upset again. That is,” she turned to look at me, “if you don’t mind me make more of a mess in my pants?”

I smiled and rubbed her head, sitting on the couch beside her. “When you’re finished going potty, I will clean you all up.” She smiled and unpaused the game. We were back on our adventure like nothing had even happened. And you wouldn’t even be able to tell with her dark pants. The only thing that gave away what she had done was the lingering smell.

She continued to play for about fifteen minutes before finally handing the controller over to me. She started to let out little farts again. They sounded wet as they bubbled their way up through the mess already in her panties.

“It’s so nice not having to get up and use the toilet,” she said. “I want to do this more often.” She let out another little fart. I was so absolutely in love with this girl. Everything about her was cute and sexy.

I got into a fight with a large boss enemy. This was a huge relief to my throbbing boner. I was happy to have my mind distracted from the cute girl filling her pants beside me. Around halfway in the fight I hear her mumble, “Oh, here comes some more.” She crossed her arms over her stomach and started to push. My mind left the game far behind and all my attention was on Kristen. She groaned as wet noises came from her behind.

“It is so wet this time. I feel like I’m peeing from my bum.” She kept making cute little grunts as she soiled herself further. “Oh God!” she leapt off the couch. “I think some just shot up my back. And it’s definitely running down my legs.” She turned a little and sure enough the bottom of her tank top was stained a light brown. She gave a final push and heard the last of her mess enter her pants.

“That felt so good, what a relief,” she moaned. She stood their bow-legged trying her best to keep the wet mess in her panties. But it wasn’t working. I could see streaks of mess running down her legs. The smell was worse, but I still loved every second of it. I took a deep breath and just enjoyed the fact that this cute little girl had just filled her pants with hot shit for me.

“Okay, now I need to be changed,” she laughed. “I’m covered in poop from front to back. I’m pretty sure my vagina is covered too.” That was such a thought hot: her shit covered vagina. I couldn’t believe that after that show I would also get to change her and see her naked.

“How did all that fit inside you, you’re so tiny,” I teased. “You had quite the blowout, Little One.” Her cheeks were beet red as she turned to head to the bathroom.

“Okay come clean me up. It’s starting to get cold.” She looked like such a toddler waddling to the washroom with a full diaper.

“I’ll quickly grab you a change of clothes,” I said. I grabbed her a t-shirt, pair of shorts, and a smaller pair of boxers I had outgrown. I made my way to the washroom where she waited a huge smile on her face, checking out the damage in the mirror.

“I love you,” I said. She looks at me and grins. “Could we…?” I trailed off afraid to ask my next question. But she had just pooped her pants for me, I could ask. “Do you think we could have sex?” She just looked at me. “After I clean you up first,” I added hastily.

“I thought you’d never ask,” she said casually. “Now clean my pussy up I don’t want to get an infection. Nothing would please me more, I thought to myself. I grabbed some wet wipes from under the sink. I also laid a dark towel on the floor in case of any mess. The whole washroom smelled of her mess and old piss. I loved it. I knelt in front of her and grabbed the tops of her waistband.

“First I’m going to remove your pants,” she nodded her agreement. I pulled them down slowly. Her face was red and her hands covered her face slightly in embarrassment. I peeled off her pants slowly they were slick with poop. I lowered them to the ground and she stepped out of them. I set them off to the side, they could be salvaged I would wash them.

I took her in for a second and enjoyed the view. She stood in front of me – my head at crotch height – her long slender legs had streaks of brown where her mess had trickled down. She wore no socks so her cute little toes wiggled awkwardly. She had the cutest pair of panties. They were – originally – a light baby blue with kiddy cartoons on them. Now the mound of her vagina was a dark blue and everything was stained a yellowish brown.

“I was going to wash your pants and shirt, I think they can be saved,” I explained. “But I don’t think these undies can be saved.” She giggled and turned to show me the back. They were no longer blue. The space in between her butt cheeks was packed with poop. The top of her waistband was overflowing, and same with the leg holes.

“Go ahead just thrown them out,” she said casually.

“I still don’t know how that much could be inside you.” She just laughed as her cheeks flushed. My hand reached out and touched the wet mound of her vagina; it felt hot. Without a second thought my head moved forward.

“Hey!” My face was buried between her legs, my nose in her vagina. I took a deep breath and smelled her. She actually pushed my head in deeper her hips arching slightly forward. “Mmmmmm,” she moaned. I could smell it all, I wanted her so bad. I could smell the stink of her poop mingled and mixed with the sweet smell of piss. Underneath it all I could smell her female smell. I just wanted to be inside her. I was at peace my face buried between her legs.

“Alright,” she cooed, “you’ll have plenty of time with it after.” She was right, I needed to clean her up first. I grabbed the sides of her underwear and started to pull them down. They were stuck to her bum but I gently pulled and they slowly slid down. I tried to keep the mess from touching her legs as I lowered her panties to the floor. They were surprisingly heavy with the poop. Stepped out of one leg first, then the second leg. I started at the ruined panties in my hand before quickly throwing them out.

In front of me was the most beautiful sight: a tiny, petite female stood in front of me, her knees cocked inward as if trying to cover up her nakedness. She quickly took her shirt off and threw them on top of her pants to be washed. She tried to keep her hands at her sides while I looked but she kept fidgeting. It was strange she was never nervous around me naked.

Her body was beautiful. She had beautiful smooth skin. She had two little mounds that were her breasts; cute little things. I kept looking down past her smooth stomach down into the pelvic region. Her vagina was as cute as she was, shaved and perfect. The bottom half of it was sticky with poop. She was perfect. Her vagina lips glistened wetly either from her pee earlier, or her arousal.

“Turn around,” I said, “I want to see your dirty bum.” She giggled as she twirled. Her once tight white butt cheeks were caked in poop. She stank, but it was so intoxicating.

“God, you’re beautiful,” I said. She turned back around.

“Even after I just shit myself?”

“Especially because of that.” I smiled. I’m glad she was enjoying this. “Alright lay down on this towel.” She did so slowly trying not to dirty the towel with her poop. Soon she was laying in front of me like a baby on a changing table. I grabbed some wipes and took her legs in one hand. And I started to clean my best friends butt and vagina. It was hard resisting the urge to just plunge my fingers between her legs. When I was sure she was spotless I threw out all the cleaning material I had used. “There, all done.”

“Thank you,” she said. “Now you’ve been patient,” she spread her legs more revealing the pinkness of her inner vagina, “time for you to play a new game.” Her vagina looked so wet and my dick was so hard. I quickly whipped my pants and underwear off. I hovered just before entering, her vagina scents filling my nose.

“Are you sure you’re ready?” I asked.

“Just hurry,” she moaned, “before I have to finger myself. I cannot wait.” She squirmed on the towel. I couldn’t wait any more. I shoved myself inside her. Her vagina was warm and moist, and it squeezed my penis just right.

“Oh God,” I moaned, “I’m sorry after everything today I’m…. I’m not going to last long.” I was panting, but I couldn’t stop moving in and out. “Your vagina just feels too good.”

“Just shut up and come,” she growled. I was so close too. I could feel the telltale signs of an orgasm building. My brain took over and my hand moved between her legs. While I was thrusting I pushed my index finger into her butthole. Her anus was still a little slick with poop so it slid in easily. Kristen let out the cutest little scream. I fucked her ass as I fucked her pussy. I could feel my dick moving back and forth with my finger. Just as my climax arrived I pulled my finger out of her bum and inhaled the smell of her butthole. God, I loved that smell. Then I just filled her little body up with cum. I couldn’t stop, it just kept pumping into her. I thought I would tear right through her. I just sat there motionless with my dick pulsating inside her. Waves of pleasure rocked my brain.

“That. Was. Amazing,” she said.

“Yeah,” I managed to get out between breaths.

“But we’re not done yet. Almost,” and before I could think she pushed me backwards and got on top of me with my dick still in her. She started to slowly ride me while playing with her little nipples. She went up and down slowly. I could feel my semen leaking out of her onto me. We just laid there for a bit her going up and down. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the pleasure. Soon she slowed down to a complete stop and was just sitting on me. Soon, I felt warmth spread all over me and I heard the hiss of urine. I opened my eyes and she was playing with one breast she whimpered as she finished her business on me.

Finally, after she finished peeing she got off of me. “Sorry,” she said, “I really had to pee again.” I stood up and kissed her; I mean really kissed her.

“I’ve been in love with you for so long,” I said.

“I know,” she winked. “I cannot believe it took you so long. Today was fun.”

“Yes,” I said happily. “Maybe you’d like to try diapers in the future?” Her eyes lit up.

“That sounds like something fun to try. Although doing it in my pants felt really naughty.”

“Well,” I said, “Let’s play some more Zelda. I’ll make some tacos later and who knows maybe your tummy will act up again.”

“We’ll see,” she laughed. She let out a cute little fart. “Oops, ‘scuse me.”

[simslegacy5083]

Not So Berry (Straud Descendants) Gen 9

Today's (8/23/2024) Episode: Gaming and Goodbyes

As everyone settled down for dinner after Skye aged up, Luigi snagged a seat across from Jade and wasted no time launching into 20 questions. 

"I'm one of the only sims around here who believes in The Watcher" he told her, "other than some real crackpots on the internet anyway." He shuddered. "So, what's it like for you, living under their direct influence? My Papa always said The Watcher could control just about anything but if that's true the one around here has a sick sense of humor!"

He then went on to describe some of the many misfortunes that had befallen him and Noemi in the past.

"Oh…my…that's a lot " was all Jade could think to say when he'd finally wound down. Well, Isra did warn me… she thought before responding.

"I don't think our Watcher controls everything. For example, my mom's friend Summer died quite unexpectedly recently, it was really hard on her. Being a legacy family may mean The Watcher keeps a closer eye on us, but in general more crazy things happen when we're around, not less!" 

"Do you know the legacy family here?" she asked "Isra and Par haven’t heard of one, but I thought The Watcher had favorites in every nation.”

"Well, actually…" Luigi began, before Noemi cut him off. "No. We've never heard anyone even mention a legacy family." she said, glaring at him. 

Jade could tell she'd stepped in something with her question, though she wasn't sure what. Now more ready than ever to extract herself from the awkward conversation she rose "It was nice chatting with you, but I think I'm going to go inside and get out of this heat for awhile."

"Hey! If we’re going inside, I’ll fire up the gaming console and start the real fun.” Rhys said. "Anyone else ready to join us?”

“You know that’s my jam." Luigi stood too, causing Jade to suppress a groan. At least if we’re playing he’ll stop talking so much! she thought.

“My foot has a prior appointment with Darth’s ass," Beau chimed in “Just give me a minute to visit the bathroom for the hundredth time today first." 

After a great session of gaming with the chatty e-sports pros Jade was almost sorry to see them off at the end of the night. “It was great to meet you, kid” Luigi told her. “Sorry about all that doom and gloom earlier. I have a tendency to get wrapped up in myself, but you were a trooper about it, and a pretty good video gamer to boot! If you decide to explore a career in E-Sports look me up, I can introduce you to some people.”

“I’ll do that” Jade fibbed, trying to be nice despite having no interest in becoming a professional nerd herself. “It was nice to meet you too.”

“Luigi, I know you believe yourself to be a legacy heir the same as Jade's sister and mother do, but we both know that isn't a "thing" here." Noemi reminded him once they’d returned home. "I thought we agreed we were going to keep that little piece of Lawbourne lore to ourselves." 

Luigi sighed "I know. I just got so excited meeting someone from another legacy; I got carried away. Thank you for reining me in, as usual."

"Happy to do it" she chuckled “now, how about you get Skye to bed while I get started on my latest side project? This one wants all their phone icons updated to penguins! The things sims come up with to do with technology…"

"Thank you again, so much, for having me. I had a blast!" Jade gushed the following morning. "I've got the pictures we took, the gifts you made for everyone, and your donation for Sims United in my inventory. I'm sure everyone will love them." 

"It was so wonderful to see you again" Wren smiled "I'll be stalking you on social media; I can't wait to see those graduation photos!"

Isra chimed in, “All Elyse wanted to talk about this morning was how much she loved hanging with "silly Auntie J!“, making Jade blush happily.

"I'll be sure to send along any fun kid appropriate memes I find for you to share with my little nieces and nephew.“ After one final hug and kiss she headed towards the teleporter that would take her home, her family watching her retreating back until she blinked out of sight.

Once Jade had disappeared back to her homeland Isra’s quietly weeping par buried their face in her shoulder and whispered, “It was wonderful to see her, but so hard to watch her go.”

“I know” Isra agreed “You want to come home with me and give your grandbabies a snuggle?"

Wren nodded, grateful for Isra’s loving support as they stepped out into the warm paradise of a sunny Sulani day.

View The Full Story of My Not So Berry Challenge Here

[agaypanic]

Erica jones x reader who’s Rorys older sister😻

Kissing the Babysitter (Erica Jones X Keaner!Reader)

Masterlist

Request Something!

Summary: You accompany your girlfriend while she babysits Jane, Ethan’s little sister. While the two of you wait for her parents to come home, Ethan and his friends, including your brother, walk in on the two of you.

A/N: AU where erica’s the babysitter for the morgans instead of sarah. Not too smutty despite what the summary might imply, they’re just kissing lol the girls and reader are in the grade above the boys. usually when i write the group, they’re all in the same grade but since reader is rory’s older sister, im making her, erica, and sarah in the grade above the boys

***

“Babe, I’m sorry, but I have to cancel our date.” Erica frowned as she broke the news to you.

“What? Why?” You whined in disappointment. “Erica, the fourth Dusk movie is coming out next week, and you promised that we’d watch the first three before going to the theater.”

“I know, Y/n, I know.” Erica sighed, equally as disappointed in the predicament you were in. Although she had basically renounced all things considered geeky when she turned into a vampire, the girl’s one guilty pleasure that she indulged in was the famous vampire romance franchise. “But the Morgans need me to babysit Jane.”

“Can’t Ethan do it? I mean, he is her brother.”

“They still don’t trust him after he and Benny let her wander out of the house.”

“Figures.” You muttered, before sighing. “It’s fine. We can watch the movies another day.” You put on a smile, now wondering what you would do by yourself on a Friday night. Erica grinned, kissing your cheek.

“You’re the best, N/n.”

“I know.”

***

Friday night came, and you found nothing better to do than lying in bed and being on your phone. You were in the middle of scrolling through social media when you got a text from Erica.

Vampire Girlfriend <3

Hey baby. wyd right now x

You smiled softly at the message, turning over on your stomach before replying.

Me

Not much. How’s babysitting going?

The reply was almost immediate, probably due to your girlfriend’s superspeed.

Vampire Girlfriend <3

It was fine until your brother and Benny came over lol the boys are playing video games and I’m trying to get Jane to go to bed.

Me

Rory’s over there?? He didn’t tell me that, I would’ve come over with him :( 

Vampire Girlfriend <3

Well no one would stop you from coming over rn. I certainly won’t :))

Me

I’ll be right over

Wasting no time, you jumped out of bed and put on your shoes and a jacket. Luckily, Ethan lived just two streets over, so it wasn’t much of a walk for you. You were especially thankful for this because it was a bit chilly outside, and you didn’t have a car.

When you reached the Morgan house, you barely knocked on the door before it opened.

“Hey!” Erica greeted you with a smile, hug, and peck on the cheek. It might’ve been a strange sight to anyone else to see Erica so affectionate. But she just liked you that much. “I finally got Jane to bed, no thanks to some people!” She shouted the last part over her shoulder for the boys to hear.

“Sorry ‘bout that!” Rory shouted back, looking over the kitchen island and down the hall. He perked up at the sight of you. “Hey, Y/n!”

“Hey, Rory.” You kicked your shoes off at the door and walked to the kitchen with Erica. “Why didn’t you tell me you were coming over here? I would’ve come with you.”

“I thought you were asleep.” Rory shrugged. 

The five of you conversed a bit before being interrupted by a stomach growling. Specifically yours. It was then that you realized that you hadn’t had anything since lunch at school.

“How about some pizza?” Erica suggested, reaching for the money Ethan’s parents left her for food. “You guys can go get it.”

“Why don’t you get it?” Benny asked.

“Because I’m in charge tonight.” Your girlfriend replied, flashing the boy a fanged sneer. “I mean, I could go. But if Jane wakes up, you guys will have to get her back to sleep.”

Before you knew it, you and Erica had the house to yourself. Save for Jane, who was sleeping soundly upstairs. You sat on the couch, trying to think of something to do, before seeing your girlfriend look down at you with a smirk that said she was up to something.

“What?” You asked.

From behind her back, the blonde showed three DVD cases, and you squealed when you saw the covers.

“I realized I still had them in my bag when you said you were coming over, so I thought we could watch them.” She said while opening the case for the first Dusk movie, turning on the TV, and putting the disk in the movie player. 

After starting the movie, Erica sat on the couch next to you. You leaned into each other like two magnets, and Erica put her arm around your shoulders. 

As time passed, Erica slowly started distracting you. Unintentional, of course. At least in the beginning. Absentmindedly, she was brushing your collarbone with her fingertips. Her touch gave you chills, both because of her cold skin and the way her fingers glided over your sensitive skin. Every now and then, her hand would tangle with your hair and give you a soft tug or two.

Then, out of nowhere, you felt Erica’s lips press against your jaw.

“Watch the movie.” You whispered, even though there was no need to.

“I can think of something better to do,” Erica whispered back before locking her lips with yours. 

Although you wanted to watch the movie, you must admit this was a million times better.

Erica swallowed your moans as she gave your hair another pull before manhandling you to lay down on the couch. You giggled in surprise at the action before locking lips with her again. The movie became background noise; all you could focus on was Erica, her mouth and her wandering hands specifically.

Erica lifted her head, smiling at the sight of you trying to chase her lips with your own.

“So needy.” She teased, cupping your chin with a hand and squeezing your cheeks. You whined, feeling your face grow warm under her cold touch. Not wanting to see your pouting lips any longer, Erica leaned back down and started kissing you again.

“Oh my God, ew!” Rory’s yell made you and Erica jump, but Erica didn’t move away from you. She simply turned her head while you looked at your brother and friends in embarrassment and surprise.

“You guys were taking too long.” She said with a shrug. Then she turned back to you, patting your hip before getting off you, offering you her hand. “Come on, let’s eat.”

[davekat-sucks]

This is was supposed to be a simple ask but it ended up getting long because of there being too many question and discussions but barely any answers so sorry about that.

On the topic of WhatPumpkin sometimes we all have to wonder what the fuck is going on behind the scenes, the latest news we got werent that much and it felt more of a like "Hey guys we are still alive dont forget about us" situation and it doesnt help that we cant really get any info because of how the only guy that Im atleast aware that works on it and is online is James and although I have no source because it was months ago, when beyond canon came back I remember him getting asked about Hiveswap and i dont remember if he answered it on the blog or on a reddit qna but he had said he cant really do much about it because hes just the music guy on that department and not an director or writer and he probably cannot say whats going on if hes aware of even the minimum because of NDAs and you know the situation is weird when not even the new director for post canon can do nothing about it or doesnt know what the fuck is going on over there either (i believe its more of the former).

On the same topic Hussie jumping the ship in my opinion feels like such an awful move in a moral and community sense, he hires fucked up people and ends up going through development hell and instead of trying to fix it he just runs away and gives someone else the work. He becasically invited destruction to that place by not doing background checks and shit and now everyone else but him has to suffer for it. I wonder if WhatPumpkin will close business after they finish Hiveswap (if they even manage to finish it) or if their writting quality wont be bad if they try to do Hauntswitch now.

I also sometimes wonder if Hauntswitch was made first maybe things could have been better. Think about it:

It happens on the Human World and you play as a cool kid looking troll and that could open the doors for a lot of potential to explore more about the Earth on the Homestuck universe and its conspiracy theories and also give us more video game parody mechanics.

The whole conspiracy theory Jude had that iirc had even the USA presidents connect to may be right considering the easter egg that shows some sort of cultists standing outside the mansion we see on the background and watching the events unfold.

We would get more answers for whatever the fuck those creatures that attacked the manor where.

another good dog best friend to fill the bec shaped hole in our soul <:

Exploration of what SkaiaLabs exactly does.

Overall sounding like an awesome story itself, a alien coming to earth and fighting a cult related to the presidents with a human companion. Especially considering how Dammek sounds like hes an asshole and also because of how trolls are usually violent could lead to interesting interactions.

I might be wrong and biased though but I feel like that concept could attract more outsiders than Hiveswap could ever wish to do. And hopefully thats it and that I wont waste almost an hour of my life rambling about this stuff (for my own sake because i feel like i could have spent my time better but i also need to post this somewhere and i dont use social media most of the time and when i do its usually to see fanart, memes and overall discussion of my fav franchises) but I probably will in the future.

It's cool with this ask. You brought up many good points here.

Yes, the question about Hiveswap was asked in a Q&A back in October 30th, 2023 from James Roach here (Archive ver for backup). The news about development should be something more like how Toby does with the Deltarune newsletter. Monthly, maybe do a special event ARG thing that gives insight of what's coming up, or anything like that. Though even with that, it might be probably too little too late since we are at 11 years since the Kickstarter had funded. Probably doesn't help since 2 million dollars was wasted, it's a mystery how the game is still being worked on if the original Kickstarter money that was given to them, had been used up. What is WhatPumpkin's new source of income then? Do they have a second job they aren't telling us about? Are they using part of that Patreon money from Beyond Canon since technically there are some that work within Hiveswap too like James? Then there's the fact Hussie not only wasted the money, but basically left the Kickstarter project he started in the first place. He may own it and be credited as the creator, but he won't be involved in the future Acts and Hauntswitch. I'm surprised nobody is pissed at him for scamming them out of 2 million dollars. Do people not care if the original person who hosted it left? Especially with the truth come to light thanks to Gio's research on this. I wouldn't be surprised if WhatPumpkin does shut down because they couldn't gain the sales needed after releasing Hiveswap Act 3. People will probably wonder if even buying stuff from Topatoco would help or not with HS merch like the prints slowly resurfacing. Drawing in the crowds from old and new to play the game will be tough. I wouldn't be surprised if Hauntswitch was first made in mind before Hiveswap. Dammek even had a 3D model ready too.

Likely back when it was still a 3D game, we would control briefly but then after the cutscene of them being transported to the other planet, we would then have to take control of Dammek, have him meet Jude to possibly have him find a way to help him back home, and the pair would adventure on Earth itself for the rest of the game to find out about the monsters and the cult. Dammek's paranoid nature would play off Jude's conspiracy theory pretty well as it has the two involved looking deep into the mystery. I wouldn't be surprised if something about the cult would eventually tie in to his home planet and the rebellion as a final grand twist. An idea like that sounds more interesting than some girl getting lost on an alien planet and was roped into some rebellion that she has no reason to be part of besides being concerned for a friend.