#it's also really hard for vampire bats to rear their young

[notquitedeadpod]

sometimes i get caught in little brain loops about the mechanics of how vampires eat. i get lost in the sauce about how much blood they'd need, what the exact mechanism for that might be

then i have to be like 'no u gotta be more loosey goosey about this' bc in reality, blood is so nutritionally incomplete that vampire bats, the only mammal obligate blood-eaters, consume so much blood just to get enough nutrients to live that they sometimes can't take flight after a meal, and have to piss pretty much constantly in order to get rid of excess water weight to be able to fly

which isn't very sexy

[gimmesumsuga]

Sweeter than Sweet (74)

AO3 link

Pairings: Jimin x reader, Yoongi x reader, Jimin x Yoongi, Namjoon x reader, Taehyung x reader, Jungkook x reader + others as the story progresses

Warnings:  Nil of note

Word count: 4.4K

Previous / Next 

“Tannie…” Voice low in warning, you cock an eyebrow at the puppy who’s plonked his bottom down right at your feet, gazing upward.  His attention isn’t on you, however; it’s focused on Nova who’s blissfully unaware of the small canine’s gaze fixed upon her, sleeping happily curled up in your lap. “I wouldn’t, if I were you.”  

He cocks head to the side as his beady little eyes meet yours, like he’s trying his hardest to understand but inevitably fails to heed your warning, choosing instead to rear up onto his back legs and press his front paws to your knees in order to sniff curiously at the feline in your lap, nose twitching.  

Yeontan has only been a part of the family for a few days but already he and Nova have established a bit of a love/hate relationship.  Being the sweet young pup he is all Yeontan wants to do is play, and whilst Nova has displayed more patience with him than you’d initially anticipated she might, the shelter cat will only put up with so many bats of her tail before she’ll turn, hiss, and offer a few swipes of her own.

Not that Yeontan takes it to heart.  Five minutes later and he’ll be coming back for more, his tail wagging just as hard.

“Tan!” Tae calls, his usually deep pitch rising by an octave as he leans forward from the opposite sofa and beckons the pup towards him, “Tannie, come!”  To give him credit, Yeontan does indeed turn his head at the call of his name, tongue hanging out as he looks back at his owner, but the lure of Nova proves far too strong for him to resist.  Unwisely, he extends one paw and taps it against the curl of Nova’s spine as if trying to get her attention and then immediately seems to regret doing so, shrinking back and cowering when all of her fur stands on end and she sharply lifts her head, spitting out her wrath.  

“Nova, don’t be mean.”  She doesn’t respond favourably to your light scalding, turning to face you wearing a similarly dirty look as you imagine Yeontan would’ve just received for daring disturb her beauty sleep.  Unwilling to risk being accosted any further, she stands, stretches, and then jumps gracefully off of your lap, leaping straight over Yeontan’s fuzzy little head. She runs from the room as soon as her paws meet the floor, far quicker than the little dog is able to give chase, and as her tail disappears through the gap in the door you hear her meow reproachfully, abandoning you all in favour of better company or peaceful solitude.  

“See, Tannie,” Taehyung sighs as the little dog trots back over and allows himself to be picked up and placed into the vampire’s lap, tail wagging. “You’ve gone and upset her again now.  Nova’s never gonna want to be your friend if you keep on bugging her all the time.”

“You’re one to talk,” Jungkook snorts from his spot at the other end of the sofa without looking up from the sketchpad he’s slouching over, his eyebrows furrowed in concentration.  Tae pays the younger vampire’s little jibe absolutely no mind, too fixated on scratching Yeontan behind the ears to really care what anyone else may have to say. He hasn’t stopped smiling ever since the two of you brought the sweet pup home, and watching the two of them now - Yeontan rolling over onto his back in search of a belly rub - your heart feels so full it’s fit to burst.  

Taehyung had known the moment he’d seen Yeontan that he was the one he’d be taking home.  You’d been lucky to find such a young puppy at a shelter - the two of you having agreed even before starting your search that you’d rather give an unwanted dog a home than go straight to a breeder - and thankfully, Yeontan had seemed to take to Tae just as quickly as the vampire had to him in return, standing on his hind legs and yapping to grab your attention; his disposition far happier than the severe slant of his eyebrow markings would lead you to believe.  

It was love at first sight, and Taehyung has been doting shamelessly on him ever since.  

Unsurprisingly, the rest of the family have also been just as eager to welcome him into the fold (save Nova, of course).  Hoseok had spent a good half an hour playing rope tuggy with Tan on the first day of his arrival, and by now Jungkook must surely have a whole short film worth of footage of their antics recorded on his phone.  Jin’s even gone so far as to start researching homemade dog food recipes, studying up on the specific nutritional requirements of Yeontan’s Pomeranian breed.

You’ve been thankful, actually, that he’s had something else to think about - something else to focus on and use as a conversation starter.  You’d had the feeling he’d been avoiding you, at first, after the three of you had bumped into him following your tryst on Christmas day. Every time you’d crossed paths thereafter he’d seemed to find some excuse to rapidly take his leave - something burning on the stove, some leaky tap he suddenly had to fix - but now, thanks to Yeontan’s arrival, he seems to have been granted the will to power through whatever awkwardness remains.  

That's not to say you haven't caught him staring at you, mind you.  You'd need more than two hands to count the amount of times you've turned your head and your eyes have locked for just a split second.  He’ll rip them away and try to cover his indiscretion by making some sort of poorly timed joke at the expense of one of the others, screeching with laughter and avoiding your gaze, but the both of you still know.  You know he'd heard what the three of you were up to and you know he wilfully stayed in hopes of hearing more. When you've drifted off into daydream lately it's been to images of Jin doing things to himself that you never would've dared think about before, but now that you've started it's almost as though you can't bring yourself to stop, morbidly curious about what the eldest vampire might be like to know so intimately.

You've already experienced the various kinks and quirks of almost every member of the house (all but Hoseok, of course, although Sam has told you so much that sometimes you think you may as well have), and yet Jin’s sexual habits have remained a complete mystery to you.  Is he assertive? Submissive? Does he have some kind of crazy fetish he's hiding behind that charming, debonair smile?

“Oh gross, man!  Hyung, he's peeing again!” Jungkook's horrified exclamation shifts your attention rapidly back to the here and now, and with pink-tinged cheeks your eyes roam the room till they land on where Yeontan is squatting over the rug to relieve himself without a care, too young to have yet learnt to cock his leg.

“Ah, Tan-ah!” Taehyung rushes off the sofa with arms outstretched and plucks his puppy from floor mid-stream, running from the room with him held at arm's length to take him outside in order to finish his business.  He charges past Hoseok as he goes, who watches on with thinly veiled bemusement at the sight of Yeontan flying through the air like some kind of canine superhero held aloft in Taehyung's hands, smiling and shaking his head.  

“Ready to go?” he asks you, perching his pert bottom on the arm of the sofa, and now you look closer you notice the car keys he's got clutched in one hand, dangling at his side.  Begrudgingly, you glance at the clock on the mantelpiece and realise that is, indeed, time for you to go to work.

“I suppose.” Sighing, you shuffle out of the dent you've made in the sofa, knowing that you've still plenty of time to get there.  Hoseok is surprisingly punctual by nature, and whenever it's him that's accompanying you to work you usually find that you've always got a good fifteen minutes or so to spare.  “As much as I'd love to stay and witness the entire repertoire of Tannie's bodily fluids.” You smile at the way Jungkook shudders at the thought.

“You should really get something on that, Kook.  Jin'll kill you if that sets,” Hoseok warns, nodding towards the smell yellow stain in the middle of the rug.  

“He's not my dog,” Jungkook mumbles down at his sketchpad, charcoal pencil scratching across the page, and Hoseok shares a look with you, rolling his eyes.  

Jungkook's sure changed his tune since last night when he was demanding that you all had equal ownership of your new companion and therefore he was just as entitled to hog Yeontan’s affections all night long as Taehyung.

“Yeah, but you're the one who'll have sat there and watched it dry.”  

Jungkook looks up, gaze flicking between yours and Hoseok’s expectant faces before he finally sighs, world-weary, and heaves himself off the sofa with a sullen,

“Fine.”  He disappears through the adjoining door towards the kitchen as you rise to your feet and brush your lap free of Yeontan’s fur, clearly too disgruntled to want to wish you goodbye.  

“Kids, huh?” you comment as you and Hoseok start to head out, smiling fondly at him as he holds up the living room door for you, nodding his head in agreement with your sentiment.  

“I blame the parents.”  His smile grows at your questioning look, twirling the car keys around his forefinger.  “And by that, I mean Jin and Yoongi, obviously.” You giggle as you pull on the coat you’d left hanging by the front door and wrap your scarf tightly around your neck, anticipating the frosty chill that you know will be awaiting you as soon as you step outside.  

“I’m not even gonna ask who’s who.”

***

“So are you and Sam doing anything for New Years?” Hoseok spares you a glance as he concentrates on parallel parking the car along the curb that sits opposite the bar, his bottom lip between his teeth.

“Mm,” he affirms, turning to look out of the rear window, “She’s booked us into some fancy restaurant, I think.”

“She knows you don’t eat, right?”  He swings the car into place with enviable ease, turning to you with a grin as he applies the handbrake.

“Yeah, but they’re doing fireworks at midnight and she’s really excited, so…” Hoseok trails off with a shrug, his smile turning adorably coy as you ‘aww’ and scrunch your nose at how obviously smitten he is with your best friend.  You’re so glad you gave the two of them your blessing; you’re not sure you could imagine one without the other these days. “What about you and Yoonmin? Anything planned?”

You frown, pushing the car door shut behind you with a thud.  

“Yoonmin?” Hoseok grins roguishly at you as you round the front of the car to his side, slipping his hands into his pockets, and as you start to cross the road together the meaning of the word suddenly clicks into place.  “Oh jesus, please don’t let Yoongi hear you call them that,” you chuckle, shaking your head as Hoseok delights in your reaction, laughing along.

You can’t imagine what he’d think of it if he did.  He might well grumble in front of the others, but part of you wonders whether Yoongi would actually be secretly pleased by the little nickname.  It’d wouldn’t surprise you, given how you know almost better than anyone just how soft and marshmallowy Yoongi is on the inside.

“But no, no plans,” you say, dodging a puddle and hopping up onto the opposite curb.  The bar sounds busy even from the outside but at least with plenty of bodies it’ll be warm, and when you push open the heavy front door you have to raise your voice in order to be heard over the din that greets you.  “Jack’s asked me to work. The new guy’s good but he’s not quite up to speed yet.”

Hoseok’s arm finds its way around your shoulder as he affectionately jostles you at his side, beaming bright.  

“Listen to you, already sounding like a real professional.”  Blushing, you elbow him lightly in the side but the vampire refuses to be moved, squeezing you all the tighter as the two of you wind your way through the many patrons that fill the bar.  The aforementioned ‘new guy’ comes into sight as you do, and when he spots you across the crowd he pauses between the glasses he’s collecting to offer you a friendly smile and a wave, his too-long bangs flopping down into his eyes.  You wave back just as Hoseok places a gentle kiss to your temple and then gives you one final squeeze before releasing you, ready to get started with the long night ahead.

“You sticking around?”  As of yet, none of your friends and lovers have wanted to leave your side whilst you’re working, preferring to keep an eye on you especially during the busy holiday season.  

“Of course,” he smiles sweetly, making himself comfortable on a bar stool as you step behind the counter, shrugging off your coat.  “I’ll be right here, beautiful.”

***

The first few hours of your shift pass by fairly uneventfully aside from the usual nightly drama.  You have to save Alex at one point from some lout who starts popping off about his drink order being wrong, stepping in and calming everyone down by offering him a free shot of his choosing on top of whatever he’d originally ordered.  Alex is grateful and Jack is impressed, and the next time he passes you behind the bar it’s with an approving tap to your back and an enthusiastic ‘well done’ that has you beaming with pride and then blushing when Hoseok, too, raises his glass.  

He’s been keeping himself busy for the most part, playing on his phone and supping on the fruity cocktails that you slip him every so often.  Not that he gets them for free, mind you; you respect Jack far too much to go stealing alcohol from behind the bar right under his nose.

You don’t notice the eyes that are following you as you walk briskly back and forth along the length of the bar the whole night long nor do you feel the weight of them as they linger, blissful in your ignorance.   You do hear Hoseok call your name as you’re pouring a pint, though, and when you glance up to see him standing from his stool and pointing at his phone as he’s lifting it towards his ear, mouthing at you that he’ll by the right back and smiling when you nod.  

Perhaps it’s Sam that’s on the phone, or maybe Jimin or one of his other brothers.  It might even be someone else entirely, but either way Hoseok’s absence doesn’t concern you.  You’ve been trying to convince them that such strict supervision is unnecessary - overkill in such a well-lit and well-populated area in which you’re certain that you’d be safe - so you’re not at all anxious as you return your attention to the task at hand save for your concern with trying not to spill all over your already sticky fingers.  

As you hand over the drink and take payment you grant the elderly gentleman a winning smile, certain that he’ll remember you when he digs into his pockets for the tip jar later.  He’s a regular that you recognise well, and you find it strangely satisfying that you’re starting to become familiar with the customer's faces; almost all of them friendly. The rare recurring ones that aren’t are the unfortunate few unlucky enough to receive watered down drinks from Jack’s own ‘special selection’.   They guzzle it down like they’re receiving preferential treatment when really they’re getting anything but, and lord, you have no shame in admitting that that’s quite often the highlight of your day.

“Ok, what can I get you?” you ask as you shut the cash register and plaster an obliging smile on your face and look up, willing to serve.  

“That depends,” the man who’s towering over you from the other side of the bar muses, “On what it is that you’re offering.”  

Your stomach lurches and then drops as your hands instinctively reach out for something to hold onto, grabbing onto the edge of the counter on which Namjoon then leans, sliding into the seat that Hoseok just vacated not five minutes ago.  

“Hello little one,” he greets pleasantly in the absence of your reply, tilting his head to the side slightly and smiling, each cheek dimpling deep.  There’s an air of leisureliness about him that is at complete odds with how rigid your entire frame has become; his easy smile juxtaposed with the mild horror you can feel distorting your features.  

It’s jarring that Namjoon looks almost exactly the same as the last time you saw him save for the absence of your blood smeared around his mouth.  There’s that same hungriness to his eyes and the same golden hue to his irises; that same warmth that you’d become all too familiar with in the months gone by.  

“What are you doing here?”  Your voice is breathy - weak - and you know it’s only Namjoon’s supernaturally enhanced hearing that means that ‘ll be able to hear you of the noise of the bar; over the conversations of the mortals around you who are totally unaware of the very real threat that Namjoon could pose if he were to lose his cool.  

“I wanted to see you,” he tells you softly, smile slipping from his face as his eyebrows furrow into a frown.  “I’ve needed to speak to you... but tonight’s the first time I’ve had the chance.”

Has he…. Has he been watching you all this time?  Lurking in the shadows, just waiting for an opportunity to get you alone?  The thought of it makes all the goosebumps on the back of your neck begin to rise and the hairs on each of your arms stand on end, prickling at your skin.   

You glance nervously at the front door that leads out onto the street and then in the other direction to your colleagues further down the bar, moistening your lips.   Namjoon wouldn’t try anything with all these witnesses, right?  He wouldn’t risk exposing himself like that…

“You shouldn’t be here,” you hiss, turning back to him and trying to muster your courage as best as you can.  “Hobi will be back in a minute and he-”

“And he’ll what?”  Namjoon interrupts, rolling his eyes. “You know as well as I do neither of us is going to do anything in front of all these people.”

It’s funny, but hearing him say that… it almost puts your mind at ease.   You’re still not comfortable by any means but at the very least you’re able to dislodge your fingernails from out of the wooden countertop and allow yourself to take a proper breath in what feels like far too long.   

“I haven’t come to start a fight,” he assures you, sighing when your expression remains cold.  

Namjoon runs a hand through his hair, looking down at the bar for just a moment as he seems to collect his thoughts, and when he looks up and faces you again you suddenly realise just how tired he looks.  Whilst living at the manor, Namjoon never looked anything other than the picture of health; pristine, porcelain skin, bright eyes and always impeccably dressed, but now it seems as though his change in circumstance is showing.  His complexion is no longer smooth like powdered soft snow but almost a little sallow, and there’s a darkness under his eyes that you’re sure was never there before. His clothes, too, are showing signs of wear and tear. They’re the same ones he was wearing the night he’d been forced to leave and they’re looking a little grimy around the sleeves and the collar - crumpled as though he’s slept in them.  

Is he eating, you wonder?  Does he have a place to stay or somewhere warm to rest his head?   You know you shouldn’t concern yourself with thoughts such as these - not after what he did to you - but it’s not in your nature to be so callous and uncaring even to someone who’s hurt you so badly.

“Then what do you want?” you ask, once again looking to the door.  If it is Sam then she’ll most likely be keeping Hoseok busy; you know all too well how much she likes to talk.  

“The same thing I’ve always wanted,” he answers unflinchingly, his eyes never leaving your face.   

Is it vanity that makes you presume that he means you when he says that?  

You’re just about to open your mouth to speak again when Namjoon suddenly reaches out across the bar and places his hand on top of your own, squeezing it tight.  It’s just as cold as the last time you felt it wrapped around your throat, and the memory has your panicked heart thundering away inside your chest as Namjoon uses his grasp to pull you closer, leaning across from his side of the bar to speak to you in hushed, secret tones.  

You’re so shocked by the abruptness of his actions and his sudden closeness that at first you don’t even think to pull back, caught in his gaze like a rabbit in headlights.  

“You need to leave the manor,” he tells you urgently, his face mere inches from your own.  “You need to leave and come with me so I can-”

“Is this guy bothering you?” a voice from your right suddenly interrupts and when swiftly turn your head you see Alex stood at your side with his arms folded, his attention fixed on Namjoon.  He’s not the biggest of guys - probably only marginally taller than Hoseok and not much larger in build, either - but he’s doing his best to make himself look intimidating, puffing up his chest.  The sight of him almost makes you laugh, so ridiculous is it for him to think he would ever stand a chance against a creature like Namjoon - not that he would ever have a clue.

“N-no,” you answer as soon as your brain manages to click back into gear, snatching your hand back as all the sights and sounds and smells of the bar come rushing back to you now you’re free of the little bubble Namjoon had momentarily caught you in.  “He’s just leaving.”

When you look back at Namjoon you’re shocked to find him staring not at you, but at Alex.  The two of them are staring each other down, Namjoon’s jaw clenched tight as his nostrils flare slightly, and you have to give Alex credit for not backing down.  You’re not sure there are many men that would do the same if they were stood in his shoes.

Eventually - after looking his competitor up and down one final time - Namjoon submits and shifts his gaze, a wry smile tugging at his lips as he holds up his hands as if to surrender, standing from the bar stool to his full, intimidating height.  You give Alex a nod, reassuring him that you can take it from here, and you’re just starting to think he’s going to leave without a fight when Namjoon suddenly leans across the bar as soon as Alex’s back is turned, cupping your face in his large hands.  

So close that you can feel his breath on his face, his deep voice utters a warning,  

“You’re not as safe as you think you are.”  

Your eyes automatically close as he presses a kiss to your forehead, soft and fleeting, and by the time you open them he’s already gone, the exchange so fleeting that no one else seems to have paid it any mind even though it’s left you shaking and struggling to catch your breath, clutching desperately at the bar.  

Was that a threat?  A warning? If he meant to let you know that he’s not intending to give up on making you his so easily then why did he refer to the manor specifically?  Surely if he was the threat you’d be in more danger out of the manor than inside it…

Namjoon’s words have your head in a spin trying to figure out their meaning, and even if you were to figure them out can you even afford to trust a word he tells you?  Does he even know what he’s saying? He hardly seemed completely sound of mind the last time you saw each other… so what’s to say that’s changed now?

“Hey, you alright?”

Hoseok’s face pops into your field of vision, bent right forward across the bar to look up at you with concern, eyebrows furrowed, and you snap out of whatever trance had you staring blankly at your feet, your lips automatically feigning a smile as you look back at him, blinking rapidly.  

You know you should tell him what just happened - should tell him all about Namjoon and the threat that he made - but that little niggling doubt in your head has you hesitating, mind whirring before your mouth opens to speak.  There’s already worry written all over Hoseok’s face, and you know the moment you mention Namjoon it’s only going to get worse because then Hoseok will go home and tell the others - others meaning Jimin, too.

He’s only just getting over all this.  If Namjoon comes up again now, so soon after it’s all happened, it’s only going to make him mad all over again.  He’ll be gunning for blood once more and it’ll be up to you and Yoongi to calm him down and… and you’re not even sure it was a threat.  Nothing really happened… is it worth saying anything over nothing when all it’s going to do is upset everyone?   You remember what Hoseok said when he agreed to you taking this job; any sign of trouble and it’ll be back to the safety and monotony of unemployment.  You don’t want that. You don’t want to lose this little bit of something that’s just yours. It may not be big and it may not be important but you’re just getting good at this…

Your mind made up, you promise yourself that if anything should ever happen again - any slightest sign of Namjoon reappearing - you’ll tell them straight away.  

“Yeah,” you lie sweetly, ignoring the warning that comes from the frantic pounding of your heart, “I’m fine.”

[thegoddamnfangirl]

Siblings

“Pairings: Damian Wayne x sister!Reader, Batfam x batsis!reader

Requested by anon:  Hiiii can I request more Damian x batsis but she is 5 years old and can it be super fluffy just like the one of avengers assemble, I swear it was the cutest thing ever💗💗💗💗 it can be about Halloween and matching costumes or going to the park or him helping her with kindergarten homework just something really fluffy

I hope you like this anon, I struggled through this one. In the accountancy period. I write in school. I get in trouble. Who cares.

Wayne Manor, typically dark and silent, was fussed up on the one night it ought to have been darker and more silent than usual.

Bruce sat at the dinner table,  listening curiously to all the sounds coming from upstairs. All his kids were yelling, but Damian’s voice could be heard above all the din.

 “I REFUSE!”

  Dick, dressed up in a suit of red, white and blue, came down, leading a procession where Tim and Jason were manhandling an oddly dressed Damian, who was struggling and yelling abuse. Little (y/n) brought up the rear, also wearing a costume, with her hair dyed blonde (she had begged Alfred desperately hard). She was holding a weird hammer in her hand.

 “Um,” said Bruce. “Am I...missing something?”

“Dad! It’s Halloween!”

Of course. He’d nearly forgotten. 

 “I’m Thor, of Asgard,” continued (y/n), “and this is my evil brother Loki,” she pointed to Damian, who was dressed in black and green leather.

“Ohkayy,” said Bruce. “What are the rest of you supposed of you supposed to be?”

“Dick’s Captain America, Jay’s Hawkeye amd I’m Iron Man,” said Tim.

“(y/n) wanted us all to dress up like Marvel superheroes,” explained Dick.

“I refuse to be a part of this stupid holiday,” said Damian. “Dressing up like idiots, going around asking for candy-”

“Like idiots?” said Bruce. “You don’t think we look like idiots every night we go out, do you, Damian?”

 Damian colored a little bit, but said nothing.

“Go out where every night, Daddy?” asked (y/n).

“Nothing- shouldn’t you guys be off trick or treating?” Bruce said.

 “TRICK OR TREATING! YEAHHH!!!” yelled (y/n).

The party that returned from trick or treating was a very bright one, especially (y/n), who, being the youngest, had managed to look adorable enough to get  more candy than the rest of them.

 “Kiddo really cleaned up,” said Jason, sounding somewhat envious.

“I’m going to take all her candy when she falls asleep,” said Dick, winking at Tim.

“Yep, it’s fair she should get so much,” said Tim, as Jason nodded along.

 “No!” (y/n) cried out horror. “It’s my candy, not yours!”

“It’ll be mine after I steal it,” said Damian.

  “You won’t steal it,” said (y/n) in a high, whiny voice.

“Yes, I will,” said Damian. 

  “No, you won’t!”

Seeing (y/n) almost near to tears, Dick put a hand on Damian’s shoulder.

 “I’ll take all your candy, and I’ll hide it such that you’ll never find it- and I’ll eat it slowly, and not give you any of it-”

 (y/n) burst into tears.

“You can’t have my candy!” she sobbed, and grabbing her bag, ran upstairs to her room.

 “Damian!” said Dick, exasperated. 

 “What?” said Damian. “I’m not really going to take her candy, why does she have to be so sensitive?”

“Cause she’s five, Demon Spawn,” said Tim.

“Just- go apologize to her, Damian,” said Dick.

Grumbling, Damian went up the stairs to (y/n)’s room. 

The door was wide open. He went inside.

  The bag of candy was nowhere to be seen- hidden in her closet, he supposed. She was sitting on her bed with her knees drawn to her chest, looking out of the window, where bats were screeching and flying past.

 “Hey,” said Damian.

“Hey,” she said, without looking at him.

“Look, I won’t steal your candy,” he said. “I was just kidding.”

“Okay,” she said, with a small sniffle.

“So, uh, we’re okay?” he asked, hoping the word ‘sorry’ wouldn’t have to make an appearance.

“Mhm,” she replied. 

“Alright...why are you staring out of the window like that? If you’re angry, just say so.”

 “I’m not angry,” she said, looking at him. “I was just looking at the bats.”

“Oh,” said Damian. “Do you like them?”

“I hate them,” she replied. “My friend Mo, from school, he says that if you get bitten by a bat, you get turned into a vampire. Is that true?”

 Damian sat down on the bed.

“Of course it’s true,” he said. “What else do you think happened to Batman?”

  (y/n)’s eyes widened. “Batman’s a vampire?”

He nodded.

 “But he’s a good guy!” said (y/n). “He doesn’t kill people!”

“Oh, but he does,” said Damian. “He grabs criminals off the streets and sucks their blood. The only reason he isn’t hunted is that the cops are afraid that he might turn on civilians if provoked.”

 “Oh,” said (y/n), “but that means we’re safe!”

“Yes, well,” he shrugged. “Every day of the year but one. See, once a year at least, Batman needs fresh, young blood. The blood of a child....I’ve heard he prefers little girls, their blood is much sweeter.”

“...oh...”

“The bats pick one out for him...a little girl with lots of candy to make her blood sweeter. And when they find the right one, they swarm around her house until Batman comes, and...” 

 Damian grinned.

 “Goodnight, (y/n),” he said, and left her alone.

 By the time he got down to the cave, Batman and Nightwing had left for patrol. Red Hood was cleaning a pistol, and Red Robin was on surveillance. 

“Suit up, Demon Spawn, Batman wants you by the docks- he’s busting a smuggling ring and it might get ugly,” said Red Robin.

  Damian nodded.

  Red Robin was right about the getting ugly part. Damian nearly got smashed on the head with a hammer because he imagined his father as a vampire- and laughed out loud.

By the time he was able to get to bed, he was beat. He’d hate to admit it, but he was beat. Damian was glad to sink into his pillows and let himself relax.

  “Nyuuh,” he said, his eyes fluttering shut.

He’d nearly drifted off when the door opened and faint light trickled in. A small figure slunk in and shut the door behind it. 

 “Damian?”

Damian rolled over to his side.

“What is it, (y/n)?”

 “The bats outside my window won’t let me sleep.”

With that, she crawled into his bed. He was suddenly struck by the realization of how tiny she was. Looking at her, he found himself thinking about how much she looked like their father.

 “Damian, I think the bats are calling Batman to eat me,” (y/n) said in a muffled voice.

He put his arm around her.

 “I’ll fight him off,” Damian said.

“What if he sucks your blood?”

“I’ll suck his blood,” he replied.

“You can’t do that, he’s a vampire!” said (y/n).

 “I’ll decapitate him, then. Don’t worry, nobody is going to hurt you while I’m around.”