#it's been 5 months since the last one
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#🤨#i just ate one and its crazy its been WAY too long since i last had strawberries#probably like 4-5 months#kora.txt
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ghost story premiere day! check @melliotwrites for more info
#*there's less than a day left* me: does this count as a prediction :33 sorry it's vague i just predict Vibes. stream sheep in wolf country#last several hours i can post this before it comes across as a Reading Comprehension Cringefail! due to the new update (premiere)#which is also to say i've rushed it in the last 24h after cc told me ''go for it''. i haven't digitally rendered like this since i was 15#in lieu of character designs falling into my lap from above i give you wolf & sheep & wolf & sheep. also House. also fire and water concept#brought to you by (1) general excitement i've been swept up in // (2) cc; who i messaged yesterday with a sketch on a half-wet receipt#and was an enabler of this nonsense // (3) copious usage of the procreate liquify tool and eyedropping colours from the pinterest boards#(4) '' rotatable 👍 '' from cc which means that the house in water isn't beset by reflections and vague. and this work is rotatable.#bonus points if you treat both sides as a spot the difference game.#tempted to print this out as like a6 merch. lowkey. // (4) me rendering last minute on the last possible day [art proj flashbacks] //#(5) ghost story art draft 1 i did like dec last year involving a shelf; incense sticks; peeling paint; spilled cup; the whole shebang -#if you look at the water house there's incense sticks in the window. yippee! had fun with that... it never made it out of sketch.#and then i lost the paper. alas. sorry i guess that was fated to never be. here's attempt 2.0 with months of hindsight#anyways let's talk really quick about song assocs! water imagery @idk you anymore // sheep in wolf country!! pretty obv. above#there's a house & there isn't a house. much House. idk how else to put it. // also that one timeline (not a song) saying <house burns down>#incense sticks mentioned in i breathe in you breathe out // the lighting for the field of grass comes from there's a house:#'where the grass looks like fire sick with anticipation'. also in the same song: pond mentioned 💥💥 body of water moment //#also also the house in this work is like. if you took the ghost story header & the ghost story programme houses and smushed them tgt#except i was lazy to render wood that clearly. and last note here is that the smoke was kinda insp from how clouds are done in chinese art.#ghost story musical
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This isn't really anything but bonus trivia for today: the most recent MMJ duet cover is now 1 year old. Happy birthday Minori/Airi Setsuna Trip cover!
#reducing the amount of duet covers in the game gotta be one of the strangest and worst decisions staff has made#mod talks#mod salt posting more like#yk we're also only 5 months away from wxs and fucking vbs hitting 1 year no duets#it's already been over a year since the last bad dogs cover
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Nostalgia (LandOscar)
My fic submission for @hypersoft-fest week one with this amazing book cover created by @rubywingsracing!! Enjoy 🧡
Fic summary below the break:
Shoved harshly to his knees before the King with his arms bound behind his back, Oscar keeps his head down low, his hair causing a short brown curtain to obscure his face from the man who now holds his fate in the palm of his hand...
#landoscar#hypersoft.fest#Hypersoft Collab Fest 2024#f1 fanfic#lando x oscar#landoscar fic#landoscar fanfic#its been like 5 months since i last posted#i struggled to open a draft on ao3 lol#my bad my bad#hypersoftfest.creations#hypersoft week one
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happy last twilight official trailer eve eve
#last twilight#last twilight the series#vishingwell#usercassi#tesstag#userpuentalay#userhanjiwoos#touseranna#lightmiup#tuseralexa#stormyoceans#tonanons#userkit#userconcrete#omg its been 5 months since ive tagged ppl fsldfslk i hope i got everyone#not sure how long ill be online tomorrow but !!!!#.... screw it imma throw in one last vv edit together tomorrow. for the boys
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boy in silly sitting positions compilation
#cats#I especially like the last one where he just has one single paw poking out of that box for some reason lol#I still have costumes to post and like a billion other things.... grr... constantly failing at staying active on social media aughh#I think because currently my Main Focus is on trying to get my game done and stuff.. which basically just means sitting and writing all day#so there's not much to post about. Though I know the Good At Social Media thing to do would be to post about the#writing and share progress and talk about the game and characters or whatever to try to build interest or something but that is SOOO weird#to me.. I could maybe get it if it was like a tiny tiny discord groupchat of playtesters with like 5 people in#it.. But something about talking openly about things before they happen is weird to me?? Like presumptuous feeling or something#''oooo guess whats gonna happen LATER!!!'' like.. how do you know.. what if it doesnt. what if you dont finish it. what if its not the way#you think it's going to be. what if something changes. etc. Like I literally avoid movie trailers and game trailers for the same reason ghj#Even if it's not ME doing it it just feels... weird.. Maybe it has to do with my OCD and how I just don't like talking about ''future''#things in Certain Terms. Like if I was going to say ''Oh yeah sure. come over to my house in a few months''. I would have to follow it up#with like ''HOPEFULLY you can come over to my house in a few months'' or 'They'll come over in a few months MOST LIKELY''. Because just#stating that something will happen matter of factly takes for granted like.. what if somehting horrible happens and I DONT have a house#in a few months? or what if something bad happens to me. or to the person coming over? I can't ever DEFINITELY say with 100% certainty#that one could ACTUALLY come to my house in a few months. anything could change. So I have to allot for that in my phrasing. hbjjkn#There are a lot of situations where you're expected to just Assume Things but for some reason that bothers me. My brain literally does not#even Assume the most basic things.. like how do *I* know that just because it's someones birthday that they want to be wished a happy#birthday? what if they dont? everyone is different and has different preferences. I should check with them first. or wait until they public#ly announce that theyre accepting birthday wishes. I have to allot for all 5034859069 rare possibilities at any given time and never take#anything for certain. etc. ghjbjhbh.... ANYWAY.. I have been feeling a bit sick lately as usual.. but still slowly making progress on some#things. Moslty I need to edit costume photos. make sculptures. and work on the game. Going back reading some of the old writing from like#2018 and suprisingly I don't have to change that much of it? In fact I like it mostly. so that's good. I would be very interested if I were#playing the game myself. Though that doesnt mean much since my tastes are so niche lol..#Still really want to clear some of my million tumblr drafts as well... alas and aughh and ooughh and so on and so forth. Between all of my#evil appointments other such things...why cant I have one billion dollar to retire into relaxed hermit artist life of no stressors.. bleas
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— a burnt child loves the fire.
#BYANYAN: an ind. priv. sel. original character exploring themes of: not being sure where your trauma ends and your personality begins, emotions that all seem to come out as anger, rebelling through self expression because it's all you have, the comfort found in self destruction, unlearning all the harmful things you grew up being told about yourself, and learning to love yourself and others. written by grey (30, they/them, pst).
♡ rules. ♡ bio. ♡ verses. ♡ credit. ♡
#original character rp#oc rp#independent oc rp#independent rp#indie rp#multiverse rp#━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ self promo.#ok fuck it i'm posting it#been sitting on this for a whole 24 hours now trying to decide if i like it or not#made some changes played around with it a lot.... i think i like it??#i know i just reblogged my last promo but like. it's been 5 months since i made that one ok it's probs time for a new one#this is me trying to cram as many byan vibes into one promo as i possibly can lmfasjfs
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Well there’s been one positive today, and that’s that the cute lesbian from my book club came back to the library today. We talked for about 10 minutes and I attempted to flirt!!
#key word attempted#but it’s been something like 5 months since I last saw her#so I frankly thought she’d have forgotten all about me#but she was the one who recognized me#which was wild#lesbian#cottagecore-raccoon#sapphic yearning
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#vent edit#actuallymentallyill#depression#sleepless nights#insomnia#i havent slept normally since november last year#since i was 14 my sleep has been bad and i feel like havent been able to really rest for years#but prior to this one thing i could actually fall asleep and then sleep for 8hrs straight#but not for several months it's so hard to fall asleep#and even if i do i wake up between 5-6 times during 7 hrs in bed#and it never ever feels restful#bc my entire body hurts and my neck is so stiff andi alwatys have a headache#going to bed is awful and i dread it the entire day#i just wanna lie down and sleep and rest but i cant
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in light of the new FB event:
#Kiran buddy#you are an adorable dork and I love you#but it's been years since the update giving you weapons#YOU KNOW HOW TO FIGHT NOW#How are you STILL getting captured by the enemy and/or separated from the group????#just last month Gullveig flung you further into the past than the rest of the order#and now you got your ass stuck in Embla AGAIN#Are you doing this on purpose or are you just THAT much of a danger magnet#that you can barely go an adventure without getting kidnapped#I swear Alfonse loses 5 years of his lifespan each time the summoner goes missing#this poor guy's heart can't take it have you seen his backstory#or last month my boy was so worried for the summoner#if this keeps up Alfonse might just decide to put Kiran on one of those kid leashes#and give the handle to the current strongest unit the order has#good luck trying to kidnap to summoner when their attached to a dragon larger than a castle#feh#fire emblem heroes#fire Emblem Alfonse#fire emblem summoner#fire emblem Kiran
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The yearning got too strong and I managed to make myself sad again, whoops
#doesn't help that we're going on day 2 of my friend not replying to me#obviously they're allowed to not feel like talking but that's not gonna stop me from being moody about it#:((#I know they have a lot of shit going on in general. it's not because of anything I did/said#you didn't do anything wrong. They aren't mad at you. You're being silly and need to calm down#I'm just sad and need a hug#but I know I can't get one from anyone and that knowledge just kinda hurts today#I'll get one when my sister visits at the end of next month. That's something at least#She was the last person I hugged back in April when I visited.. oh man that's really depressing.#It's been over 5 months since I last got a hug#and it'll be another 8 or so untill I'll get to visit family again#oh I'm devastatingly lonely#I get like. 2 hugs a year on average. Lol that's really sad#simi speaks#sad boy stuff
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adanseydivorce (I can not Believe this wasn’t taken here) >>> bluesadansey
#s speaks#prev.bluesadansey#it’s been a while since my last url change (5 months which for me is a long time to keep one) this one isn’t Too different so easy enough#but honestly too good not to change too)
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.
#personal#sometimes i wish i knew what it was like to be someone people want to talk to#or at least had students who could listen to what i say for just five minutes#god i hate yelling then they say thats all i do when if i talked normally no one fucking listens#then i take it way too hard when they say they dont like me when at least i stepped up to take their class#a class that had already ran off one teacher#but no im too useless because i actually make them do work and tried to have rules#last year was hard but at least i felt fulfilled by the end of the year with all my classes#i have never craved the end of the year so much or as much as i have this year#its not even both classes either its just this one that makes me dread working with them as much as they apparently hate me#sadly i can understand why their teacher left#and i know im not the best replacement since im learning how to teach them as they learn from me#but im just tired#its only a month left but i am so ready to never see any of them again#but depression does as it does and makes me question if im even good enough to get another job#one actually teaching my correct subject that i love#i hope like hell that i get a job and one i really want because i dont want to have to come back to this school#*it has the most substitute jobs#i dont like being loud even if no one believes me i dont like being mean though i know when i have too i just dont feel good enough#if i was i think i would have a job by now i mean im 28 and its been 5 schools in 5 years#sorry being sad on main#if you read this#thanks
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I decided to re-read the bendy books because it's been a while since I read them.
#bendy and the ink machine#batim#dreams come to life#bendy books#Buddy titledrops again at the end of the book#in chapter 24 lol#anyway; apologies for my crappy sense of humor#That was one of the first things I thought when I read this sentence#It's been a LONG time since I last read DCTL so it was good to revisit and remember what happened in this book#despite some bumps in the road I still find myself entertained by the story#and it gave me new characters to think about#I really like Buddy and Dot#shoutout to them#and for Abby too#Abby Lambert my beloved#my main plan; or at least the original plan#was to reread the first book; then reread The Lost Ones#then to finally read Fade to Black for the first time;because it's been 5 months and i still have to read it lol#Maybe I'll reread TIOL too I think#and maybe the other two; I don't know; that wasn't part of the plans before.#crookedsmile open his mouth;bendy#crookedsmile open his mouth
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idk i think my bf might be developing a drinking problem and i just don’t know what to do…..
#it’s been going on for a couple of months now but he promised he would stop and he had been doing well until today….#and it’s like. on one hand i never wanted to be w an alcoholic and i told him straight so he promised it would stop#but on the other hand i can’t just abandon him#and it’s like we used to go out a lot and party but like. that was it but ever since he met this guy he just gets lost when he drinks w him#and the thing was he got like aggressive like he didn’t do anything to me and i can’t really explain it but he just wasn’t himself#and like. we talked about it a million times and it’s not like it happens every week#it’s been like 5 times since december#but 3 have been on the past month alone#and two weeks ago it got bad like he almost got into an accident#and like i’m not even physically w him anymore like we really only see each other once a week since i moved#and from the very first time it happened i told him i couldn’t be w him if it kept happening#and after that incident two weeks ago he swore it was the last time but it just happened again#by the way he and that guy get wasted it really is a miracle they get home alive#and like. idk what to do#i really don’t want to be w someone like this#and i hate feeling like this like if i were to think only about myself i don’t want this i hate feeling like this#but i also can’t abandon him#like not even bc i would miss him or whatever i just wouldn’t feel good leaving him alone#but like i don’t want to live like this#maybe i’ll ask for some time to just figure things out#but it’s gonna suck so bad bc we were supposed to see kendrick lamar next week and then we already had plans for his bday and omfg#i don’t wanna leave but i don’t want things to be like this either#and i asked him to stop and gave him multiple chances but idk#i just don’t know what to do#i love him endlessly but i need to put myself first but i can’t abandon him:(#and our 1.5 anniversary was also next week…..#but i think time is the sanest and safest thing right now
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(steeples fingers) due to the unique way i have comepletely ruined my arm* i think. i might have to give up dragoon specifically.
*which i did by spending multiple years button mashing due to a combination of adhd-based 'what if i zone out and forget to hit my combo' anxiety and and a general unfamiliarity with 14's particular style of combat followed by force of ensuing habit.
sorry hallima ;-; you're still a dragoon in my heart
#ive been taking it easy for a while now#learning DRK and SMN mostly bc theyre easier on my arm#SMN i can almost play normally tbh. but ive still been avoiding anything too high intensity anyway bc yknow. healing. w/e#but i tried to play DRG today bc i was feeling better after spending 5 days at con (and thus not so much as touching a videa gaem)#and the reaction of my arm was *instant* (and not in a good way)#its been months since i last really played dragoon...#i think. probably. idk my sense of time is not the best#i miss it tho#machinist also made my arm go NO. FUCK U. but im not as attached to that one so w/e#i did do dawntrail as dragoon but ngl i really shouldnt have. the writing was on the wall wrt my arm but i thought if i was careful mebbe-#i did it all with the support system and there was a *lot* of breaks between every battle#no one ever accused me of being smart i know i brought this on myself (mostly. prob still wouldve happened eventually)#(i do have an old sprain injury in that wrist that i dont think ever quite healed right)#ANYWAY uhhhh this has been a woe is me post you may continue on your way#stop talking to yourself flight
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