#its like just this once im going to be desi on main

[loverofallthingssmart]

ok guys so im still on my bollywood movies except zukka spree and i had the best idea for them…………hindi medium au

(don’t worry i explain everything that happens so)

this got really really super long (courtesy to me not being able to shut up) so the au is under the cut (its also not formatted AT ALL and like really big paragraphs because i couldn’t find the right places to break it up because, as mentioned before, i ramble and probably used run-on sentences so im sorry in advance :/ )

for those of you who are not brown, let me give you the rundown of the movie (it’s on amazon prime so)

background info (i live in the states so please correct me if this is wrong): in india, there are 2 types of schooling..you have the “hindi medium” which is like public school for us and then you have “english medium” which is like super posh private school for us. and so everyone wants their kid to get into English medium because it’s basically a guaranteed way for your child to become well-read and get a good job so you can “not be a disgrace to the family name” and stuff like that…….got that? cool keep that in mind

on to the plot…..basically it’s rich girl meets poor boy but they have a kid and of course they want their kid to go to an english medium school and learn how to become well read……the issue is after multiple counseling and advisors and rejections and waiting lists galore, they find out because they’re rich and the dad isn’t really well-educated (the dad owns a clothing business..a fabric one..brown people know what I’m talking about), they are kind of like wait-listed since there are other people deserving of it………so they have the bright idea to fake being poor and get the lottery ticket into the school that the poor people are given. so they do it and they get away with it but they realize how shitty the people there have it and they feel super guilty and it’s really emotional because they make friends and those friends are like SUPER nice to them and yeah…..it ends with the dad (who was raised in a hindi medium school) showcasing how talented the kids that are too “uneducated” to join the school are at the rich peoples’ winter showcase or something and everyone claps and it’s a big thing (i cried so yeah it was great)

now moving on the the zukka part…….

i mean canon basically would say zuko as the rich, well-read one and sokka as the poor boy who is smitten but like……fuck the canon  so sokka is the absolute genius and zuko is the one who quit business school and got disowned because his father wanted him to and he didn’t want to (azula is not in this but like....you could find a way to add her ig??) and started his own bakery that’s in collaboration with his uncle’s tea shop and caters to big parties and stuff, while sokka is the mastermind and works at an engineering plant and such because this is my au and i do what i want

they have izumi (how? mai as surrogate because her and ty lee run in the same class as zuko and they obviously kept in touch because they helped zukka elope AND eloped as well because i want mailee and i will get it dammit) and obviously they want her to have the finest education she can have (because zuko is harboring extreme insecurities about how he shouldn’t deserve sokka and maybe he should have gone to business school and that would make izumi get into these schools….it happens in the movie, albeit a little more on the down low but this is zuko we’re talking about so)…..the plot plays out like how it does and so now they’re poor, and they meet kataang (katara is still his sister but they both married below their class and sokka got cut off from katara because he and zuko eloped so he recognizes her……she doesn’t) and their 3 kids and they meet suki..who has an entire dojo and a home to kids who need it to provide for (the kyoshi warriors are a biker gang for people and kids who feel unsafe where they provide shelter and food for however time you need and you cn pry that out of my cold, dead hands) iand they meet toph who ran away from her rich parents to be free of their expectations and they feel SUPER guilty but alas, it’s too late and they go back to their rich lifestyle, after getting a lottery (instead of one of kataang’s children, you choose which one: bumi, kya, or tenzin) and they donate an insane amount of cash to the schools in the poor district to fund for some of the stuff they go without, and aang goes to their house (not knowing it’s them) to thank them for their donation and gets heartbroken after realizing they were faking and stuff………after all of that, everyone feels shitty for a really long time (look you want to end it here i won’t blame you..perfect angst potential) but they have the winter showcase for their young, prodigious students and zuko has the brilliant idea to bring the other kids from the other schools here and put on a show. sokka wholeheartedly agrees (in the movie, the wife is against it but that is NOT sokka’s nature, both he and zuko are both all for helping people and sticking it to snooty rich people) and it ends with everyone clapping and everything is forgiven and stuff (forgive me it came out a few years ago and i forgot every little detail that happened)

[roseskiesandbutterflies]

Killer Queen - a few things before we start

hi. I just wanted to say a few things about this story that you should probably know beforehand so I don't have to add a million things in the author's note or do the classic Clunky Exposition and Explanation thing. none of these are spoilers.

first of all, the first few chapters of this are shit. they just are. I was quite young when I started writing this and my skills were not exactly fully-formed. I just wanted to say this so you don't start reading it, go what the fuck this is shit (I do the same if I have to look back it's embarrassing), and stop reading. please just bear with them and then you'll get to the good shit. I do intend to rewrite them but fuck knows when that will be.

UPDATE 08/07/22: I am in the process of going back, rewriting, fixing things, changing things, etc. but I will be doing it in bits so I apologise for any inconsistencies with the story between now and when I finish changing what needs to be changed.

please for the love of christ take the things that happen in this fic with a grain of fucking salt. people are not perfect and neither are these characters. they are going to fuck up and do questionable things and it might not get addressed until much later on. just trust that if something concerning happens I will explore it properly at some point.

while im on this topic, I need to mention that they have sex. yes they're 15 at the start of this fic. yes that is a bit weird. yes I am going to explore this later on as carefully as I can. yes I myself am at that age so no im not sexualising teenagers. no there is no smut in this at all. once again just bear with me here.

it swears. a lot. I don't censor cos who can be arsed realistically.

most if not all of the main ships in this fandom (im talking wolfstar, dorlene, jily/flowerpott) will happen they're just gonna take a while to get going. just trust the process and all that jazz. this isn't a spoiler its literally in the tags lmao.

most of the characters are poc. deal with it lmao. some of yous fancasts are so white its boring. (ruth is jamaican, james is desi, sirius is chinese, remus is ugandan-jewish and welsh, dorcas is somali and lily is lebanese)

I know the sirius is east asian headcanon is controversial so I'll change it if anyone feels uncomfortable with it. the only reason im keeping it is that a lot of people who actually are east asian in this fandom like it (the first time I heard of it was from ashes-and-ashes on tumblr who is east asian herself).

james also has adhd. it's a pre-established thing, it's not really a plot line at all so it'll only get brought up when it's relevant, just thought I'd say now so no one's confused as I have no idea when it'll get explicitly mentioned or talked about.

this fic plays into a few stereotypes that I wasn't aware of until long after I created the plot points. the main one being the fact that ruth is black and her father isn't around. I was literally 11 when I made this up and I had no idea this stereotype existed. however now I know better (thank fuck). im not going to change it for the only reason that it's for the plot (its actually quite important but more on that later). so im just going to apologise for that in advance.

I wanted to make this as canon as possible when I first started this, but now I don't care. I am throwing all caution to the wind and letting you know now: THEY DO NOT DIE AT THE END this is going to have a happy ending or so help me god

also The Prank doesn't happen. why? I don't like it, it feels horrifically out of character and this is my story next question

I have a social media version of this as well if you're interested!! I started it more recently and its got some plot stuff that I would ideally like to have in the earlier chapters of this version. ill put them in here if I ever get round to rewriting this. anyways maybe consider checking out that one for the plot stuff if nothing else lmao

I will be updating this if I think of anything else that yous need to know beforehand

right now that's out of the way lets fucking begin.

[just-a-fangirl13]

Why s5 *might* be the season MacRiley happens

Okay so...Hear me out! I'm not crazy I promise!!

Firstly, after 5x03 (and probably 5x04) it may seem very unlikely that MacRiley could ever happen. But I thought of a few reasons why they might actually happen by the end of s5 after all.... (it gets a lil long winded and kinda complicated but just stick with me till the end!)

1. All the MacRiley moments including the ones in 5x03.

[this Mac smile could not be an accident or something that slipped through both production and post-production right?! that in itself is a whole reason!]

Every Macriley moment we have ever had- whether it's the hugs, Riley saving Mac, Mac saving Riley, the ultimate show of loyalty when Riley went after Mac during Codex or even just the looks exchanged between the two- to any outsider it would seem pretty obvious that they are dating or at least in love. Keep in mind the writers would have written each of those scenes and Lucas and Tristan have acted them out with a specific build up in mind aka MacRiley.(think about the date episode: Riley just got dumped but was still thinking about how Mac might be hungry. She didnt have to do that. She could have just shown up at his place..) I mean how can they write two people so perfectly in sync and so perfect for each other and not have them end up together? It would just be a waste of all that tension and slow burn. (not to mention all the hugs and glances)

2. They know we exist. 

The MacRiley fam is very active on twitter with the writers and while they were writing 5x01 they knew we were around. They know we are a huge group. They would not want to risk pissing 90% of the fandom off by not making MacRiley endgame.

[P.S.yes 5x03 was a bait and switch but if you were paying attention you would have noticed that neither Lucas not Tristan live tweeted or hyped up the episode. They knew we would probably hate it so they didnt publicise it too much! so in the future if you have doubts about the episode being a MacRiley one just check their stories or posts on twitter/intstagram]

3. Yes 5x03 happened. 

I really think it was an episode they HAD to write. Ok so after 4x13 they had 7 more episodes planned and were filming 4x20 (aka the finale) when the pandemic struck. So they have these 6 episodes but no finale for it. [Idk if anyone else has noticed but in 5x01 there were clearly some parts cut out. For example the conversation between Desi and Riley towards the end seemed a bit jilted. Riley asking Desi to forgive her but Desi replied with yeah we are cool (still no apology ofc) I feel like something happened during that which ended up getting cut out so it could fit with the final story.]

This makes me think that they have rewritten a few bits to tie into the new finale episode. In 5x03 when Mac asked Desi to come fishing with him which was clearly something very personal to him she was like no do better.. then we see Mac's disappointed expression. She could have easily said okay but maybe not for our first date? Or its not really my thing? Or just about anything else rather than laughing in his face like that. Eventhough MD is together they still arent compatible. Mac’s final words in 5x03 was him being desperate. I truly think he is so broken and lost that Desi is the only safe thing left, the only thing he feels like he can fix right now. Once he finds himself again and heals...then it's going to hit him like a pile of bricks!!

4. But Riley doesn't have feelings anymore...WELL doesnt she? 

When it comes to Mac, Riley is always in denial. We saw it in s4 when she tells Bozer not to make her say it. I think s5 will show her finally accepting it. Finally accepting that she is in love with her best friend and that it definitely isnt Codex adrenaline because she caught the feels when Codex wasnt even around. While Mac's arc would include realising he and Desi are never going to work and that he is unhappy and that RILEY is the one for him.

[why else would they give Riley feelings for Mac? Something has to come of it.]

5. The slow burn rule.[this point is a lil complicated] 

Now season 5 is rumoured to have 13 episodes. So here’s what I think: If MacGyver follows the pattern that most shows do when it comes to slow burns, then technically MacRIley should have happened at the end of season 4. But since the season got cut short and they didnt get to air/finish their final episode the writers had to improvise. 

From what I know, 4x19 which is 5x04 for us is the episode where Mac meets Desi’s parents and 4x20 was supposed to be the finale that was left unfinished.(they are definitely moving the timeline ahead if a pre finale episode is suddenly a mid season one.) There might have been a 4x21 or 4x22 but I haven't heard anything about those....EVER.

So what I think they have decided to do instead is extend the MD storyline a bit longer just so they dont end up scrapping all their s4 episodes where they would be together and write a new finale that ties everything together, aka MacRiley.

If you think about episode counts, s4 and s5 together would have 26 episodes which is a how long a normal season runs. Basically what im trying to say is if we follow the ‘slow burns end by s4’ and take season 5 as an extension of 4 then MacRiley should get together in the season 5 finale or maybe the episode just before. (IM REALLY TRYING TO GET SOME LOGIC INTO THIS)

This would be a typical TV thing too where the couple finds out about each other’s feelings while the main arc of the show is also at its peak, which perfectly sets up a future season where fans are hyped but still has a satisfying ending.

6. So what about MacDesi?

So far the macgyver writers have given us characters we love. Think of every character on the show apart from maybe Desi... Mac, Riley, Bozer, Jack, Matty, Leanna, Samantha, Russ and even Murdoc. WE LOVE EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM. So then why is Desi such a strange character? I think shes purposely been written as an opposite to Mac or even Riley (I get she’s supposed to kinda replace Jack but Jack is really irreplaceable). 

It's not necessarily a bad thing its just not a great thing to do or have great execution. People have said things like Desi is a badass and shouldnt have to apologise or say I love you back to her boyfriend because she is a strong woman...I'm sorry but your opinion of who a strong woman is, is EXTREMELY skewed. A strong woman is someone who can make mistakes and when she does, she is ‘strong’ enough to own up to it, she is loyal and fierce and also caring while being a badass who can take down bad guys. And for GODS SAKE, RILEY DAVIS IS A STRONG WOMAN...people have called her mushy and feminine on twitter and I'm just very confused by that.....

Anyways before I go off on a rant, it seems like Desi is intentionally being written this way. Every opportunity they get to redeem her and make her more relatable or just a better person they just dont take it. While Rileys character arc is one of the best I've ever seen. Either its intentional or they’ve forgotten how to write characters...which is worrisome but ill give them the benefit of the doubt.

The writers also know we dont like Desi. The amount of times we've tagged them in the toxic posts or pointed out problematic things we can be sure they've seen at least half of those. So theres no way they dont know. RIGHT?

So why then is MD still a thing you may ask??

Well for one they cant break them up again off screen because of those unreleased s4 episodes. (not to mention the other parts of the audience who arent as invested in mac’s love life would probably be very confused.)

Secondly Mac has to be the one to pull the plug, not Desi. 4x13 made it seem like Desi was the annoyed one not Mac. He apologised to her which meant he wanted to fix things. 

Thirdly, they are opening the chpt one last time before they permanently close it. MD is going to be a stark contrast to macriley(it already is in every way possible). Every issue Mac and Desi had can be used to show how amazing macriley really is as two people who arent even dating yet.

Fourthly, MD being together is a sort of commentary on Macs mental health as well. We can see how happy he is with Riley but around Desi he becomes some one else. If the writers are doing this on purpose or subconsciously still remains to be seen.

And Yes keeping MD around for a few more episodes seems like a necessary risk right now but I have a feeling its going to be worth it later.

[I know we have had like 4 desi entered episodes already but I really think 5x04 will be the last of it since 5x05 is the Jack episode and 5x06 is Mac+Riley+Bozer episode with no mention of Desi at all!]

The writers know we are a dedicated bunch and they know that once MD breaks up for the last time the entire fandom will be waiting and watching. That's when the show will be at its peak. That will be the perfect moment to bring in MacRiley’s arc to a new start!

Congrats if you stuck with me through this whole thing! if you agree/disgaree with any of these or have other reasons why they could be endgame in s5 let me know!!

[glrchmp]

i’m just gonna dump all the shit i rambled about to shan last night. to give you an idea of what my leon portrayal is like ‘til i... make a proper about section on the google doc lmao

in my hc leon is desi—his family on both sides are from india (or whatever pkmn's equivalent is; copperajah is said in its dex entry it's from a far away region). his mom's parents were immigrants and his father's family had been in galar for a while. he's not too tied to his culture due to having a bit of a gap between him and his family since he became champion but he is fluent in hindi thanks to his grandparents wanting him to learn it when he was small.

during the game he's around… twenty-one? it says on his league card that he started his journey at ten, so i'd assume he became champion at ten as well. the game says he’s an adult, and also says hop remembers leon telling him he’d become champion so leon would have to be eighteen at the Least since hop is still a kid (around like fifteen imo). ANYWAYYYY he’s still pretty young!

when he was six and hop was still a few months old their father died from illness and it shook him pretty hard because he was attached to his dad, more so than his mom, and that’s such a young age to lose a parent and he never really knew how to cope with it.

the thing is though was he was forced to grow up too fast. his dad dying when he was young, he felt like he had to fill his role as hop was growing up (sonia did say leon “practically raised” hop). but going on a journey at ten and becoming champion at ten kinda tore him away from his family and… well. he had his childhood stolen from him. at ten he had already started questioning his gender identity but hadn’t come out yet, so his sense of identity being skewed while forced into the position of champion and becoming this icon and role model when he was still so young.

they called him a prodigy, becoming champion so young and on his first try, and everyone who had watched him during the league challenge had already noted he was insanely skilled as a trainer, not losing to a single trainer once. leaving his friends sonia and raihan in the dust, basically, and taking them both down in the champion cup. and then rose started saying he could be a hero — because galar needed a hero in the years to come, he could be like the old heroes of galar leon always heard stories about (and leon had excitedly asked him if he could wear a cape, since he was going to be a hero now!), and what ten-year-old wouldn’t love to hear that? the chairman himself acting like the father he had years ago, but there was something different in his eyes that leon was too young to notice.

i should mention, at ten he basically becomes his family’s main breadwinner.

at twelve he figures out his Gender Stuff and confides in his friends and hop (who excitedly calls him his big brother immediately) and at thirteen he comes out publicly and not long after manages to convince rose to help pay for his name change (and rose had agreed, of course, but his smile didn’t really reach his eyes—leon was too starstruck to notice, or care). rose also helped him with changing his image a bit, pulling any merchandise, commercials, ads, etc with his face on them and replacing them with new things more suited to who he really was now. at that point something in his relationship with rose shifted, but he was too young to notice then—when he looks back on it now, in hindsight, it gives him a foul taste on his tongue.

at sixteen he gets permission to start hormone therapy, and at seventeen he gets top surgery. sonia and raihan are there for him the entire time and leon had already started noticing he had some Big Feelings towards raihan even before this (maybe since they first met as kids, even). raihan always laughing with him, teasing him, holding his hand to lead him places whenever he got lost. raihan sitting at his bedside post-surgery showing him funny videos on his phone while he was stoned from painkillers… but leon staring at raihan’s face more than at the phone screen… basically, this boy is GAY.

once the eternatus stuff happens… this is basically what rose was grooming him for to begin with. to be the one to defeat and catch eternatus and “save” galar. to be the “hero” rose always told him he could be. but being a hero doesn’t sound so appealing anymore when it’s been drilled into you for over a decade until you don’t have a real grasp on your identity outside of hero, outside of champion (who is he now, really?). it’s not so appealing when you’re standing in front of a three-thousand-year-old, sixty-five-foot-tall monstrosity oozing venom who brings back galar’s darkest day. and then it beats you, leaves you crumbled against the ground as two children, one being your brother, brings it down and saves the day.

(he wasn’t the hero this time, and he has mixed feelings about that.)

he wakes up in a hospital bed with a searing pain along his ribs, like he’s being burned, like his skin is coming off and he cries from the pain the moment he wakes up and then the memories come rushing back, everything that happened to put him here. and he cries more. and when the nurses come in to give him medicine and change his bandages he still cries and falls unconscious again. when he wakes up again sonia is there, and then raihan is there, and raihan holds his hand and smiles at him. tells him that he may be the champ, but he shouldn’t force himself out onto the pitch just yet if he’s hurting. but leon being leon goes out there three days later.

and he loses.

(people say it’s leon’s first lost in 11 years, but eternatus was truly his first loss.)

his title of champion taken from him, and he doesn’t know who he is anymore even though he has so many people in his life that love him. so many fans that love him whether he’s champion or not. he strikes one more pose in the pitch despite the searing pain in his body and grins even if there are tears stinging at his eyes.

ughh im rambling anyway leon figures out who he is outside of being champion eventually but it’s a Process. but… he gets there! slowly but surely. and he learns how to be happy. starts the battle tower, takes the role as chairman when rose is carted off to jail. has more time to be… himself. in the league cards it even says he seems livelier in the battle tower… anyway, i love him,

[erikismybitch]

This is for the “Ruining Each others life” prompt.

I cant find the original post .

@killmoncoochie​ @killmongersaidheyauntie

----

“You know I don’t be out here like this”

You didn’t want to be there, back in your old neighborhood. Surrounding yourself with the bad shit and habits you chose to forget. Desi, your good friend sat in the drivers seat of the car. The two of you were posted outside of Lincoln's. A shit-hole club, filled with hoodrats and trouble.

“Well, we here now, so you gotta’ come with me” Desi told you, with so much attitude. You had been complaining the entire car ride, and she was over it. The only reason you agreed to go was for Desi’s brother, it was his birthday. But as soon as you pulled up, you felt that nervous tug in your gut. It was telling you to go back home.

“This is not like one of those dumb hood movies. You know the one where the person leaves the hood and comes back to get caught up. Its just us, girl”  Desi laughed at you, you never used to be like this.

“I know its y’all, but I have a work presentation in the morning. Its at nine” You wined, trying to force some type of sympathy from Desi.

“Its not even midnight yet, we don’t even have to stay long”

The two of you sat in silence, Desi pulled down her car mirror and checked her make-up. You on the other hand, observed your surroundings.

Niggas everywhere.

You could hear the loud trap music from outside, you could smell the potency of the weed too. A group of girls walked by, they were being viciously cat called by all the men. You smiled because you used to be just like them. Dressed to kill, ass hanging out with a head full of bundles. Fortunately, you were no longer that girl, after college you ran away from this place. You never looked back.

“I heard Erik got out, he gon’ be here too”

Erik. That name gave you a brittle feeling. Erik was the main bad habit that you had to break. If trouble was a place, Erik would be the king. You once felt like Erik ruined your life, but truth be told, he never forced you to do anything.

He didn’t force you to fight other women

He didn’t force you to steal for him

He didn’t force you to get drunk and high

He didn’t force you to love him the way you did.

And you loved him hard.

“He- he’s going to be there?” You stuttered

“Yeah, thats what my brother told me, said he been out. Aint shit changed and he back doing the same shit” Desi replied. She applied more of the pink lipstick that you felt was three shades too light for her. But in true hoodrat fashion, nothing was too much for her.

He still robbing the rich and selling to the richer. You thought to yourself. You knew what he was doing because you used to do it with him. “He used to drive me crazy” You mumbled as you reflected on what you once had with him.

“Drove you crazy? I hated being around y’all. It was like Bobby and Whitney” Desi joked.

“Bobby and Whitney though, don’t be dramatic”

You two finally got out of the car, with Desi leading as you walked in. You were greeted with some familiar faces and some new. They were wondering why a girl like you was in a place like this. You were dressed down. High waisted blue jeans, a cropped sweatshirt and trainers.

“Why she dressed like that, she aint finna’ pull no niggas” You heard a girl say. It took a lot for you to ignore her comment. If this had been the Y/N from two years ago, you would have dragged her across the dirty floor.

After what seemed like eternity, the two of you found Desi’s brother. He was surrounded by people in Lincoln’s low budget V.I.P section. You gave him a hug, all while your eyes searched for any trace of Erik.  It was unexplainable, you didn’t want to see him but at the same time you did.

Time went on, and your hope started to fade. You had just let Desi know that you were ready to go.

Something happened.

It was like a magnetic force, it caused you to look over your left shoulder for no reason. Erik was right there next to you. You didn’t say anything to him, but the light in your eyes said it all.

“Aye?” His eyes squinted in confusion, he didn’t expect to see you here at all.

“Hi” you said bashfully, letting out a long breath of satisfaction.

Fuck, I almost forgot how fine he was. You said to yourself. He was still the definition of handsome. Built, brown skinned, dimples and perfect teeth. He had a smile that drove you crazy. He opened his arms to let you know he wanted a hug, you embraced him. Your head found that familiar place on his chest. You took in his smell, he smelled like Tide. Your eyes closed as you rested there for a moment. Erik was in no rush to let you go either.

“I still check up on you sometimes through Desi, I heard you doing good” He said, still holding you.

I’m gonna kill Desi.

“Yeah, I’m doing okay” You said.

“Aye yo, E!” Somebody called out to him, he pulled away from you and walked away. He  went over to some guy, they slapped five and proceeded to talk about something. You didn’t like the guy. You wanted to punch him, he had taken Erik away from you and that was reason enough. You timed the conversation, they talked around six minutes before Erik found his way back. He let everybody know he was leaving. He didn’t single you out, like you felt he should have. No goodbye hug, no “can I call you later and catch up”.

Fuck that, I’m me.

He started to leave the club. You lost control of your pride and weakness took over your feet. And, before you know it, those feet were walking through the club and out on to the street . You looked around frantically. You didn’t see Erik, but he spotted you .

“You looking for me?” He called out. His gold bottoms beaming at you . You didn’t speak, you were stuck . You couldn’t believe that you had actually ran after him. This was not how you imagined your night would go.

“You better go back in there with Desi and them” he warned.

“They good “ You assured him that this is where you’d rather be .

“Come on then” he walked off and like a puppy dog, you followed suit. He led you to his car, a BMW. Not bad for a man that just got out of jail.

“Can I drive it, like old times?” You asked shyly. Erik hated driving when you guys were together, he made you drive everywhere.

“This ain’t old times though”

Ouch

“Well, if you’re gonna be that way, I can go back inside “ you told him.

“I never asked you to leave”

Your were taken back at his comment, feeling defeated you turned away and began walking back to Lincoln’s. You hadn’t even made it two steps before he reacted .

“Bring yo’ ass back here and get in the car!” He yelled forcefully, even the bystanders looked at him. You smiled coyly .

Bobby and fucking Whitney .

Satisfied ,you took the drivers seat and pulled off . Erik let you know that you were going to his house. He rested his seat back for comfort and pulled a bag of weed out of his pocket. He pulled out a backwood and started to break the weed down on his pant leg. He looked over at you. “You missed me?”

“Yes” you told him without hesitation “I didn’t even know I missed you until I seen you tonight”

He rolled up, then lit the blunt with his lighter. He took a hit and inhaled. He took another, then handed the blunt to you. You took it and did the same.

“Not gon’ lie, I missed you too” he said.

You turned the volume knob up on the stereo. Futures “56 Nights” was played from the bluetooth of Erik’s phone. Hood niggas love future .

His left hand started to creep up your thigh, he gave it a squeeze . You almost crashed the fucking car. Thank god you were almost there.

You pulled into his apartment complex. He got out first and waited for you to pass by. Just so he could wrap his arms around you from behind. You walked together, he hovered over you and kissed your temple.

You know you’re going to let him fuck tonight, right. You told yourself as you guys approached his door. You still had his keys, he told you which one to use and you unlocked it. His apartment didn’t look the same. It lacked that womanly touch it once had when you spent time there. “Go to the room, I’m about to get a bottle” He told you as he walked towards the kitchen.

“It better not be no damn Hennessy” You warned. Hood niggas love Hennessy.

“Oh, I forgot you think you classy, what do you want, wine?” He joked.

“I would love a nice glass of wine” You said, trying to speak extra proper, just to toy with him.

“Henny it is”

He grabbed the sixteen ounce bottle from the freezer and joined you in his bedroom. “You do the honors” He handed you the bottle to open. You took a quick swig, it was strong. Your eyes squinted as you felt the heat travel down your throat. Erik eyed you closely, smiling at your reaction. “Get some more” He egged on.

You turned to him, bug eyed. “I drank at Lincoln’s, I cant be hungover. I have to be at work at nine” you wined.

“Fuck all that, just take one more sip” Erik held the bottle up to your lips, He knew you were a light weight .“Im just tryna’ get you loose” That hand found your thigh again. So, you took one last taste. This time, It didn’t burn as bad.

It was his turn now, he took a huge gulp. It didn’t bother him at all. Erik wasn’t new to this. You weren’t either, so it bothered him that you didn’t want to drink.

That hand that was on your thigh, soon found the neckline of your sweatshirt. Aggressively, he pulled you closer to him. His lips found yours and you didn’t hold back. the two of your tongues danced, his hands toyed with the brim of your jeans. You moved his hand and played coy, that didn’t sit too well with him.

“Get naked, lay down on your stomach like you used to” He commanded. You sat there stunned for a second. “You heard me right” his voice was louder, more demanding this time.  

You did exactly what he told you to do .You laid there, completely bare. Erik observed how your curly kinks fell down your curved back but stopped right at the bubble of your ass. He ran his hands down your spine, his touch made your pussy throb. He wanted to do something for old times, something you loved.  He opened his drawer and fetched a small package of cocaine . He brushed your hair over you shoulder to make space. He trailed a perfect line of coke along your spine.

“I’m about to fuck the shit out of you“ He hissed, you bit your lip in anticipation. In one quick motion, he inhaled the line through his nose.

He slapped your ass hard. Really hard. He could see his handprint welting on your ass cheek.

“Fuck!” you screamed, trying to wiggle away from him.

“You know you love that shit!”  He slapped it again harder, pulling your legs back towards him. He let his weight fall on top of you. You huffed loudly, trying to regain a little composure. His head rested on your shoulder blade, You could feel his hard dick poking you in your back.

He took the rest of the coke and placed it on his finger, then he brought it up to your nose . You told yourself you would never go down this path again, not with him , not with anybody. But Erik was so enticing and you knew how good the sex felt when you both were high. “Come on babe” He almost sounded sincere, like he was begging.

You leaned down and sniffed. Its just a little bit.

“Take another shot too, don’t act like that” That sincere voice wasn’t there anymore, the demanding Erik was back now. He reached over to the floor and grabbed the Hennessy. He handed you the bottle . You quickly took a swig . Slowly his tongue traced down the middle of your back. He kissed it, right when he reached the top of your ass. He clawed and spread your cheeks apart. Erik attacked your ass hole with his tongue . Hungrily he ate you like it was the sweetest thing on earth .

“Fuck! Erik I fucking hate you!” You screamed, throwing your head back in ecstasy. The way he was licking and slurping made you clench your teeth, you didn’t want to let out that scream he was working for. You didn’t want to give him the satisfaction, yet.

“You love me” he boasted. He bit her your ass cheek and raised himself up “Get on your knees, arch that fucking back”

You slapped your hand on the mattress, partly pissed that you allowed him to take you here. He didn’t force you though, so you did what you were told. You spread your legs a bit, to give him a back view of your aching pussy. He placed the head of his dick right along your anticipating lips . “Put it in” You demanded. You were feeling the effects of the coke and alcohol, you wanted nothing more but to get fucked.

and boy, could Erik fuck.

“You know I like it when you beg for it “ he teased .You ignored him and tried to inch your way back on to him. He gave your ass another hard slap in warning , you let out a scream “Bitch, I told you to beg” he growled.

“Come on baby” Your hand beat impatiently on the bed, as if you were tapping out already. Without warning, he pushed himself inside of you. None of that slow shit, his blood had been pumping ever since he saw you at Lincoln’s. He had been dying to be inside you again, ever since you left him. All those lonely nights he spent without you, all those other women he’d been with that couldn’t compare to you, he wanted to make you pay. His hands carved in to your hips and forced your body to meet his brutal strokes. “Oh god, Erik.... Fuck!”

The bed squeaked to the rhythm of his pounding, his walls were thin, the neighbors could hear you both for sure. “Take that shit!” He brought his hand down and rested it at the small of your back. Slowly he crept his thumb to your ass hole, entering it slowly.  It surprised you, it made you more excited. More wet.

“You like that shit huh, you like when I play with that ass” he said proudly.

“Yes baby!” You yelled, in a pitch so high that he could barely understand you. He slowed his pace, enjoying the euphoric sound of his dick going in and out of your creamy folds. His free hand trailed up to your hair and pushed it all to one side.

“Let me see that pretty face” Erik said lowly, his voice was so deep and raspy. You bit your lip at the sound of it. He let out a moan when you turned around. Your eyes connected with his. Still stroking you slowly. You started to come back down, and you thought about the consequences. You weren't on birth control, but as you stared at his handsome face, a baby didn’t seem that bad.

“Turn over” Erik whispered. You laid on your back. His strong hands ran up your legs and gripped your ankles. Slowly he spread them into a split. “Look at it” He said. You looked down. He quickly pushed himself inside of you and then pulled out. “You see how wet my dick is?” He asked, you hissed in response. He did it again. “You gon be back over here to see me again” He pinned your legs back and gave you hard steady strokes.

“Ohhhhhhh fuck , baby!” You could hardly breathe, he was showing you no mercy as he tried to pound a hole into the bed.

He watched you , eyes glossy unable to catch your breath.  He knew you were on the verge of cuming. He looked away because your face alone was reason enough for him to bust. He shut his eyes, clinching his jaw as his nails pierced into your thighs . “Let that shit out Y/N!”

You were trying to hold on, but you couldn’t take it anymore. “I’m about to c- ohhhh, I’m about to cum!” your hands carved into his broad back as you released a gut wrenching orgasm.

He was still fucking you, trying to milk himself. You pushed back. “I’m not on the pill, you gotta pull out” you panicked frantically.

“Hell naw”

Fuck it.

His face dropped down to your neck, you could feel his warmth releasing inside of you. He bit on to your neck and stayed there. You wrapped your arms around him and kissed his forehead. The two of you laid in silence, nothing but the sound of heavy breathing and the ticking of his wall clock. You glanced at .It was nearing 3am. You knew if you left now, you could still give a decent presentation in the morning. But even if you could, now that you’re with Erik, you didn’t even try.

[chroniclesmuslim]

February 10th, 2018

**real names have been changed for the sake of privacy. YES i changed the name of my muslim crush and friends to christian names. If you have any advice for me or any comments, please feel free to leave them. just a regular muslim girl trying to find love (the halal way)

So nothing really has changed since i made my last update. I texted him yesterday and initiated conversation. I kinda felt weird doing it though since this whole scenario is weird in general. i'm used to him hitting me up in the mornings while he’s at work and starting a convo and tbh i think the main reason why i feel kinda iffy about messaging him first is because he had also told me in his "tbh" moment that the reason he wasnt 100% interested in the beginning was because he felt off about how i initiated us talking from the beginning. that a girl should make a guy feel lucky to have her and that he also figured that since i was the first to make the initial move, that must’ve meant i've done this in the past with other guys.

kinda funny though considering he's the first guy i've ever tried talking to. im sure he realized after the thursday meeting (if he was still unsure) that i've never done this before. highlighted by my awkwardness + shyness. i remember there was a moment where there was a silence and i looked up to him looking at me. which kinda freaked me out and made me look down, and when i looked up again he was still staring at me. and legit i looked up and down for a solid 10-15 seconds. ugh im legit sooo awkward lol why can't i talk. but on a side note i just found out that some guys find a girl being shy as "cute". i hardly think he thought my behavior was cute though lol more so annoying for the fact that we ARE friends and i didnt know how to act like one.

i know that even though when i met him on monday for the first time (since like last year), i was even more shy. I would cover my face and mouth with my hands and not look at him that much. but he was able to control the conversation and kept making jokes etc etc. that was the main difference between the first meeting and the second. i was less shy in the second meeting but i guess my awkwardness was rubbing off onto him. i dont know how it'll go this week (heck idk if we'll even still meet) but i hope that i can be more myself and show him that im not as boring and awkward as ive been making myself out to seem. and i also hope he can take control again for when i DO slip up and get quiet.

but anyways back to the whole texting thing. i messaged him and it has been kinda choppy. tbh the flow of our texts is kinda similar to the flow of how our meeting went. choppy and silent lol. i keep thinking that he probably regrets talking to me and that he doesn't really wanna have communication with me anymore. it makes me feel sad. i want to bounce back at least through our texts but im not sure how to anymore. i forgot how we used to talk and how we used to be able to talk about nothing for hours. i dont know how to do that anymore which is weird considering that its only been 2 days since i was last able to. again i guess he's being nice about it but i feel like he's partly ignoring me again. like how he used to ignore me last semester. the only thing that made me kind of optimistic was how he mentioned that if i ever do come to see his dad at their store, his dad might think i was a druggie or something since not many desis come around to that area. he was basically trying to make a joke about my presence at the store after talking to his dad about another muslim customer that walked in. so that means he at least thought of me when he was joking with his dad. and then he sent me a snap afterwards of a song on the radio. which made it feel normal again.

i guess i might be overthinking everything but i KNOW that this next meeting will probably determine how things will go. i dont want to mess it up and i've been thinking of different ways to go about it. i wanted to text him and tell him how it's just hard for me to be myself with him in person still and i need to feel a little more comfortable around him before we can develop a flow in our conversations and stuff but then i figured i might as well tell him that in person. so at least thats one conversation we can have the next time i see him. plus he's a nice guy, one of the good ones, so i feel like if i told him how i genuinely feel and acknowledge the fact that im uncomfortable then he might feel the need to make me more comfortable. i also told “Amanda” about everything and she wants to come make a "guest appearance" the next time we meet up to kinda help navigate the conversation and make me feel more at ease with her presence.

i also DONT want to meet again at the cafeteria on campus. first of all, its soooo hard for me to hear him when we're in there. i guess bc of the kitchen and of the starbucks line and everyone sitting and talking near us and the fans overhead etc etc. i realized that one of the main reasons why our conversation was so choppy was also because i had made a mental list of everything i wanted to talk to him about (in hopes of not running out of something to say) but because of my list, i kept jumping from one topic to the next without actually stopping to LISTEN to what he had to say and then ask him a follow up question. like how the heck do i forget how to listen??? such common knowledge but of course i effed up on that too lol. another reason why i dont want to meet at the cafeteria is because i dont like sitting right across from him, it feels like we are in an interview and it doesn't help me relax but makes things worse for me. plus there's nothing to really do at the cafeteria. he eats only zabihah so we cant even order food. i was thinking maybe we could go to the gameroom and play a card game like uno or something. i know he wanted to go to the gym on campus and sit on the benches for the basketball court so we had more "privacey" aka not as many people around to bump into us lol but that's also kind of scary. because then we can't have a break and talk about someone we just saw and we would also be forced to pay 100% attention to each other. i dont know if i want him to pay that much attention to me when im acting all goofy the way that i am. but i know that if we go to the gym it would make more sense if “Amanda” bumped into us since she's always there exercising to begin with.

i just hope he hasn't given up hope on me. it's so weird to think about where we were a few days ago to where we are now. we were so comfortable and honest with each other. we still are honest and stuff but we aren't talking as much. we aren't sharing things anymore. it kind of feels like we are preparing for things to not work out. but i want things to work out. I know “Bill” and “Samantha's” relationship in the beginning was similar to ours. but they had the opportunity to see each other multiple times throughout the week so they got over this phase quicker. we only have the chance to maybe see each other once a week and since its a hassle for him to begin with he might just figure it's best to give up on the whole idea. i dont want him to give up on me.

i just realized its 12:01 AM and i missed Isha namaaz. so i have to make that up. i've been praying for him in my duas. before i would pray for his MCAT score and either an acceptance to medical school or for Allah swt to show him a path that will be the most beneficial and satisfying to him and his deen. now im starting to pray again and make dua that if we are meant to be then make it easy for us. (also for us to be meant for each other lol). i guess the reason why i feel so strongly for him is bc i haven't met any guy or even heard of another guy as hard working as him, as focused as him, as god fearing as him. we match in what we want in this dunyaa. and when i think about him in my future i see someone that i can pray with and be happy with. someone that i can feel safe with. i just hope he doesn't give up on me.

just take it one day at a time.

[theincorrigiblemagpie]

I’m just making this a post and tagging you, @tellywoodtrash because it’s too long to fit into your askbox, and I know you’d once said the IM feature makes you anxious.

Yeah, the title Maryada and its setting had all the red flags I associate with the worst of desi TV but it wasn't at ALL of that ilk. It was actually really thoughtful and interesting and well done. Sure it wasn't perfect but it was the kind of show you'd want to have a *conversation* about. I don't know if the gay storyline was a FIRST but it was a better one than most queerbaiting American shows. Not only were the gay men not comic relief *cue casual homophobia on all “progressive” shows* but they also had an actual happy ending. That is, they weren’t killed off to resolve that conflict and they went off to America or wherever instead. Happy.

Moreover, the women were written as complex, grey, and interesting people rather than your standard desi tv stereotypes. Even the villain was more complex than your average Kamini just because the writing paid attention to chalking out different facets of his life.

But the women. Four women who had to deal with the word ‘maryada’ in different ways. The evil alpha cop (the main villain)’s wife played by Indrani Halder. Her sister, played by Kamya Punjabi. Indrani’s gay elder son’s wife, played by Vindhya Tiwari. And the younger son (played by RaQesh)’s wife played by Riddhi Dogra. Indrani was your perfect wife, perfect matriarch but one who knowingly overlooked a lot of her evil husband’s evil acts. Kamya was her more effervescent sister in a very abusive marriage, who ends up finding solace in her evil brother-in-law after her husband dies. Vindhya was a sweet and naive girl who had unknowingly married the gay elder son since he couldn’t tell his parents and they suspected it but were unwilling to face it. Riddhi had been picked up by the cops for going for a drive with her own fiance and then the cops had raped her (I think) including the evil patriarch, and her fiance her dumped her and her unsuccessful attempt at prosecuting her rapists had only brought her more trouble in the community. But then she’s courted by and eventually marries the younger son of the family, not knowing in the beginning that he’s her rapist’s son.

Basically they all have to deal with a lot of shit but then they come together to defeat the evil patriarch. But along the way there was some unbelievably interesting angles like RaQesh not shaming Riddhi but also them having a conversation about how he as a man is simply incapable of understanding her situation. Then Vindhya feeling jealous of RaQesh and Riddhi’s sex life after they’re married and yearning for the same intimacy with her husband who won’t touch her and she doesn’t know why. Not to mention all the sex Kamya and her husband, and later her evil brother-in-law had-- no ageist restriction of passion to the younger couples. Then a much younger lawyer falling in love with Indrani while he fights her eventual divorce case and helps the women out in other ways. Indrani deciding to NOT marry the younger lawyer in the end and asking him to be friends and him agreeing without a complaint. Vindhya also not remarrying after her husband leaves but just staying with her in-laws and running her own NGO or whatever because she doesn’t want to get married, not because her in-laws won’t permit it. And by the end, ALL the women have successful jobs and careers and live together and bring up the children like a commune with like two men around-- RaQesh and the old grandfather.

So Maryada was a hard but fairly satisfying watch in many ways.