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chnsfairy · 5 years

Text

name please ? | han jisung

words ; 3,441

genre ; fluff, a bit of crack

requested ; yes, who prompt 1;iv ( @skzrequests )

warnings ; barista!reader, guitarist!jisung, like two curse words

a/n ; ok so i bent the prompt juST a lil bit but it has the same general idea and i think it turned out ok so i hope you enjoy it lovely !

m.list in bio

“you know y/n, one day you’re gonna have to learn how to make latte art properly,, (￣￣|||)” woojin complains before once again guiding your hand over the small mug which at this point is just a huge mess

“and on your own”

(￣ε￣＠) (￣ε￣＠) meanie

“you’ve been what ? working here for half a year and you still dont know how-” woojin tried to continue, but unfortunately for him, his attempt to teach you how to correctly use steamed milk has come to a crashing halt as a loud bang followed by groans was heard by the front door

you turned on your heel and headed towards the front of the counter,, trying to figure out what exactly caused the ruckus in the usually peaceful coffee shop

excluding your’s and woojin’s bickering in the back

“uhhhh excuse me ???” you ask,, carefully peering over to the giant mess that was now on the floor

“you ok sir ?” (・人・)

sprawl across the floor, carrying a guitar case, it seemed as if the stranger misinterpreted both the speed he was entering the door at and the size of the case,, cause it seemed he got caught at the door ahfjksadhfkjsa poor kid (｡╯︵╰｡)

he came dressed in some simple ripped light jeans, white t-shirt, and light jacket, plus his fluffy brown hair messily laying atop his head as if he just got out of bed

i mean who knows maybe he did

yes he did

“aH ! im um,, so sorry im late....”

after finally collecting himself the stranger stood up and picked up his guitar case,, pink tinting his face from embarrassment and like...you know... he kinda cute (*/ω＼)

no tea no shade

especially when he started messing with his already messy hair yeah there was no use trying to fix that mess but uWU LOOK AT HIS CHEEKS AND SPARKLY BROWN EYES AHHH !!!! (/▽＼*)｡o○♡

woah woah there cool in y/n he just walked in

it’s not your fault he just happens to be absolutely adorable

but maybe it would be best to stop staring at him,,,,

when the boy started walking towards the counter you found yourself quickly shuffling behind woojin, who was now confused, as you pushed him up front to handle with the newcomer,,

CAUsE SORRY BUT THERE WAS NO WAY YOU WERE GOING TO BE GETTING THROUGH A FULL CONVERSATION WITHOUT MAKING A FOOL OF YOURSELF SO WHY DONT WE STOP THAT POSSIBILITY NOW

“hi so i was hired a couple days ago to play a few nights a week ?? this is the right place yeah ? im sure i got the address right....if n-”

woojin interrupted his ramblings before he could continue any further,, bless him

“ oh !! so thats who the boss was talking about !! yeah let me just head back to make eveything’s in order, um y/n can you get him a drink or something ?”

walking away from you he left you completely exposed,, giving the other boy across from you an awkward laugh you grabbed woojin’s shirt quickly to stop him from leaving

“woojin you didnt tell me we were getting a new guitarist !!” you whispered harshly

“ᵒʳ ᵃ ᶜᵘᵗᵉ ᵒⁿᵉ”

“well sorry i didnt think it was important ¯\_(ツ)_/¯”

“does our friendship mean nothing to you”

woojin laughs quietly as he walks through the the door leaving you alone with the cafe’s new guitarist who just so happens to be looking like a whole ass model

“so um,, ” you started nervously,, mAN who thought this one person you make you so fLUSTERED JHASKKSAFKL

“want anything to drink ?”

after staring at menu up on the wall for a couple seconds the guitarist gave you a small smile JHFJKAGJISFIJEHUIGH before nodding his head

“sure can i have an iced latte ?”

out of habit you immediately asked “name please ?”

“oh you know... just your friendly neighborhood squirrel”

(・・ ) ? (・・ ) ? (・・ ) ?

you eyed the boy who was now leaning up against the counter smiling to himself

“i- oh come on wh-”

“thats the name,, you better write it down”

sighing to yourself you carefully wrote it down,, not necessarily sure if you even need to but who cares

as the musician pulled out his wallet to pay you put up your hand to stop him

cause no way you were letting this cute boy pay for his drink

plus he’s an employee as well

“it’s on the house”

“no please let me pay for it ( `ε´ )”

“nope”

so without anyone else there to help, you stepped away from the register and started prepare this strange guitarist’s drink

quietly laughing to yourself as you do so

moments later woojin walks back through the door and out from behind the counter and motions for mystery boy to follow him towards the small stage the cafe had

it was small and shoved into a corner, all wooden as most of the cafe was and it was covered with many different plants and decorated with fairy lights

vv aesthetic if you do say so yourself

then in the center of it was a stool and microphone for performer to set up with and use when they were performing

a couple months ago you had a band play here on friday’s so you had some other equipment in the back but it seemed unnecessary for a simple acoustic guitar

you watched as the boy looked at the fairy lights and the actually quiet beautiful set up in awe

the musician started to unpack his guitar case as you finished off his drink and started walking towards the stage where woojin was showing him where everything was

“you know now that i really think about it ‘squirrel’ kinda suits you”

the sparkly eyed boy laughed as you handed him his drink,, unknowing of what you should say you ended up standing there awkwardly for a few seconds before realizing there was another customer back at the register

“ah- i should,, probably go” you said jabbing your thumb towards the counter before awkwardly heading back

what was tHAT AHHH !! STOP BEING SO WEIRD Y/N OK

ITS REALLY NOT YOUR FAULT HIS HAIR JUST LOOKS PERFECT AND HIS EYES ARE BRIGHT AND HIS SMILES CUTE AND OK TIME TO STOP NOPE NOPE NOPE

you dont even know his name....(｡•́︿•̀｡) (｡•́︿•̀｡) (｡•́︿•̀｡)

lil thot wont give it to you

but thats ok

if he wants to play it like this then thats fINE

you can deal with that

hopefully....

by the time you had finished helping out the other customer you started to hear the sweet sound of an acoustic guitar being played throughout the coffee shop

“you know he’s not half bad,,,”

woojin had returned from helping the musician get settled and soon found his regular spot on a stool in the corner

“yeah,, he’s pretty good isn’t he”

and then a few minutes later you found yourself completely absorbed in the brunette’s angelic voice filling the shop, his guitar only making it even more beautiful

your staring was soon interrupted by woojin pushing you off to the side so he could help a lady who had walked in about a minute ago,, which you hadn’t realized (＞﹏＜) oops

“y/n would you like to go take your break ?”

(´♡‿♡`) (´♡‿♡`) (´♡‿♡`)

!!!!!

“ can i ???”

woojin motioned you to go once again,, and as you were already so distracted it wouldn’t have made much of a difference

you found yourself sitting at an empty table in the corner,, you’ve heard some other guitarists perform many times in your life but this one takes the cake

you’re not too sure what it is about him but,,, he just looked and sounded so sincere with every word he sang ??? the guitar and him looked like they were a single creature,, knowing exactly how to work as one

it was just really beautiful

he was playing a cover of a song you’ve heard a few times before called ‘better days’ by jaie,, he also seemed to have ended up adding some extra elements to fit his voice better and overall it made an incredible impact

almost everyone else in the cafe had their eyes on the musician singing up front who looked so immersed in his music there would’ve been no time for stage fright

“i’ve had my better days, and you’ve had your better days too” he sang quietly

soon after the song had ended there was a light applause from the customers in the coffee shop,, including you who soon.... realized that you need a paycheck....

yeah ok the cute boy is gonna have to wait we gotta get that bread kids

(╥_╥) (╥_╥)

after making the short walk back to your position behind the counter where woojin found his spot once again on his stool until he had to go make up some drinks you started to hear an acoustic version of million dollar man by lana del rey flow through the cafe

it was simple and elegant and you felt kinda sad you couldnt sit and watch :(((((

there was only a couple hours left before you had to close up so you guess it wasnt that bad,, at least you got to listen to some pretty music during the normally slow and quiet closing shift

honestly at this rate you might fall asleep if the guitarist kept the atmosphere this peaceful,, i mean you weren’t complaining bUT THAT PROBABLY WOULDN’T LOOK GOOD TO THE BOSS

so instead you ended up reading for the most of the time until all the customers had all left and woojin had begun wiping down tables and sweeping floors as mystery boy packed up his guitar and papers

then after you finished cleaning up the counter and throwing all the trash out back you collected your own belongings and changed back into your own plain jeans and sweatshirt before clocking out for the day

as you headed back towards the front you saw woojin talking to the unnamed guitarist and waved at the pair before finally walking out the door and into the early spring air

“bye jinnie !! i’ll see you tomorrow !”

nodding his head woojin continued to chat with the brunette as you started heading down the block and towards your apartment

man,,, why did he have to be so cute ??! >:((((

its not fAIR HE DIDNT EVEN TELL YOU HIS NAME HES MEANNN

(ノ_<、) you’ll have to get it from him tomorrow

aAAH even if it’s the last thing you have to do

ok so maybe you went to sleep thinking about the sparkly eyed boy who played beautiful guitar and had an aMAZING voice but like ajdhjsahd who wouldn’t

the next day was mainly the same,,, you had your regulars and a few newcomers who just so happened to be in the neighborhood and stopped in for a drink

and of course the guitarist walked back into the shop a little after 4,, this time slightly more put together

his hair was styled a bit and looked even better but how the fuck is that possible,, today he was also wearing a leather jacket over a yellow hoodie and black jeans

although you hadn’t realized he’d come in yet ahjksfhasdjk

but when you finally looked up you were pleasantly surprised

but jeSUS HI YOU’VE SEEN WHAT AN ANGEL LOOKS LIKE BYE YOU CAN GO TO HELL NOW YEET

“what are you a ninja ? ”

“yes y/n,, i am in fact a ninja ”

“hEY WHY DO YOU KNOW MY NAME >:CCCCCC”

its nOT FAIR hE JUST- HNGGG

“it’s on your name tag”

“oh yeah”

you slightly pouted at the boy in front of you who had become slightly amused by your reaction,, you were cute uwu

“and what would you like today ?” you proceeded as you tried to keep the conversation going

“hmm how about a cappuccino”

he responded after a couple of seconds

“nO i cANT DO THE FANCY ART THINGYYY (╥﹏╥)”

you sighed once again before talking out a paper cup sharpie in hand

“and name ?”

"you said it yourself,,, im a ninja”

you laughed again before rolling your eyes as you scribbled down ‘ninja’ on the cup

“you’re funny you know that ?”

the male shrugged his shoulders and picked up his guitar case once again

“actually no beCAUSE MY JOKES ARE NEVER APPRECIATED”

he then laughs hysterically before heading back towards the lit stage,, leaving you puzzled

“heY uM woojin ????” you needed to find that man to help do the steamed milk,,, or maybe the whole drink all together

luckily he just came back from his break when you shoved the paper cup into his hands

“ninja ?”

“dont ask. pretty art. make. plEASE ? (ಥ﹏ಥ)” you had started tugging on your friends sleeve because you just really didnt want to give a cute boy a cappuccino without pretty art on it :(((

“fine fine fine,, but this is the LAST time,,, im teaching you this weekend i swear...”

“woojin i loveeeee youuuu” (´ ε ` )♡

“(￢_￢) i know”

minutes later after the musician had gotten set up and with his pretty decorated cappuccino the sweet sound of his voice and guitar filled the air,, having all other customers in the room turn their heads to find exactly where it was coming from

especially as he started doing a cover of instagram by dean,, which was yA KNOW AMAZING

he continued to play for a couple hours until you had to close up,, although every so often he ended up glancing your way,, to find that you were also watching he quickly turned away as he felt his face heat up (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)

lucky you,, he didnt see you freak out at the exact same time

and thats basically how it went every day for a while

the still unnamed guitarist would walk in some time after 4, ordered a drink and then played for a couple hours before it was time to close up

nothing out of the ordinary

i mean maybe nOT GIVING HIS NAME

CAUSE GODDAMNIT YOU’RE GETTING ANNOYED BY ALWAYS WRITING SOME RANDOM NAME ON HIS CUP

HE CUTE OK YOU WANNA KNOW HIS NAME AHHHH

oh why dont you ask, you question ????

YOU’VE TRIED

“ok real name this time”

“y/n i’ve already told you”

ψ( ` ∇ ´ )ψ ψ( ` ∇ ´ )ψ ψ( ` ∇ ´ )ψ NO

“well tell me again”

“yeah i decided that it changed today”

sighing you completely gave up on this argument and motioned back to the sharpie in your hand

“kermit the frog.” he said before crossing his arms in a fake pout

“fuck you i love kermit the frog”

“oh i didn’t know you loved me”

((╬◣﹏◢)) aAHHHH NDHFJKJK WHY CANT HE JUST LEAVE YOUR HEART ALONE ALREADY HUH

“nO I- HNGG T^T ....φ(・∀・*)”

you once again angrily scribbled down this boys fake name,, damn you just wanted to knoW AHHH !!! (╥﹏╥)

those were days where five minute arguments were involved with the name picking yet there were others that lasted only 30 seconds

“ __〆(￣ー￣ ) and name please ?”

“ironman”

“yeah no im just leaving this here today”

so after a couple weeks it was just a thing between the two of you

it was your bit per-say

ok maybe you have a tiny crush on the guy but like ???? who wouldn’t ???? he’s just AHhfhasjkf

words cant properly explain it

the two of you clicked almost immediately and you dont feel as if it would be completely wrong to call him a friend

except most friends know each other’s name...so there’s that bit to work out

iF HE WOULD JUST GIVE IT TO YOU

so after a month of random names on paper cups you had a mission today to get this cute boy’s name on his drink today >:(

“ok please please please please please please your name????”

he gave you another one of his bright smiles before simply saying “han”

(￣_￣)・・・ “han what?”

“just han”

(¯ . ¯٥) the lil liar

you know it’s a last name you’re nOT STUPID

“it’s my stage name”

“＼＼٩(๑`^´๑)۶／／ WELL THAT DOESN’T COUNT”

“TOO BAD Y/N”

you pouted once again at your failed attempt to get his real name,,, the meanie,,, why does he tease you like this >:ccc

but you gotta get paid so you grumpily write down his stage name on the cup as he walked over to the stage

“get his name yet ?” woojin comes up from behind you as you hand him the cup

“no :((( bUT why cant you tell me ????”

“i’ve been sworn to secrecy”

“wHY IS KEEPING A NAME A SECRET” you argue as you watch woojin prepare the drink

“because he finds you cute when you get flustered like this”

“bECAUSE IT’S JUST A NAME LIKE- wait what (・・ ) ”

“oops that was another secret soRRy”

you turned back around and grabbed your friends shoulders and shook him probably a bit too violently

“WOOJIN YOU DONT KEEP THINGS LIKE THIS FROM YOUR BEST FRIEND OK WE HAVE A PACT”

“what pact ?????”

“it was an unspoken pact.”

“thEN HOW AM I- you know what never mind i shouldn’t question your insanity” he waved you off so he could finish making ‘han’s drink leaving you both flustered and confused behind the counter as his guitar soon started filling the empty sounding coffee shop

about two hours later there only remained a few other people left so you decided to take your break for the evening as by now there probably wouldnt be much to do

soon a new song had started playing throughout the cafe and your head turned to see the guitarist giving you a shy smile

it was one you had never heard before so the gentle acoustic guitar and han’s comforting voice drew you back towards one of the shop’s tables where you then sat until all other customers ended up leaving

as the two of you were completely unaware of woojin cleaning up the shop, han continued playing and you continued listening to the mystery song before woojin shouted from the back room, forcing you to break eye contact and awkwardly smile at the guitarist

“y/n im clocking you out ok ?!”

“ ok !!” you shouted back before once again turning towards han who was now packing up his case

“what was that last song?”

he muscician scratched the back of his neck before laughing sightly

“uhh it was an original although i haven’t actually titled it yet,, i just wanted to test it out”

“oh wow !! well it was really good, you have my approval ☆⌒(≧▽° )”

“woah really ? thank you that mean a lot...”

(・人・) (・人・) (・人・)

ok woojin it would be great if you could just walk in here and break the awkward silence by now hnNG

“jisung”

∑(O_O;)

“sorry what ??”

“han jisung,,, thats my name”

(O.O)(O.O)

“i think you deserve it by now”

Σ(°ロ°) Σ(°ロ°) Σ(°ロ°)

“aWE A CUTE NAME FOR A CUTE BOY LOOK-”

oh shit (o_O)

well you certainly did not mean to say that out loud

“oops sorry heheheheh”

jisung was GONE

this barista who he had been secretly pining over for a month just called him cute all his insides are just HJSADHKJAKDSA

help the poor boy

his stomach is doing flips as we speak

i mean he couldn’t just leave it as is

cOME ON WHERE’S YOUR CONFIDENCE ヾ(。＞＜)シ

“so um,, does that mean i can take you out to coffee sometime ?”

(;;;*_*) (;;;*_*)

“although unless you dont want to-”

“yes.”

“i get that like you kinda just learned my name”

“yes.”

“not too sure why that was kept a secret so long but- what?”

“jisung 1. ahhh cute name, 2. yes, i’d love to (／。＼)”

jisung gave you another one of his adorable bright smiles that felt as if it could light up a whole room,, which is did as always,, although this time he looked almost even happier

and for once you went to sleep without racking your brain for ideas as to what his name could be

bonus ;

“although if you give them something other than your name i will leave”

“y/n”

“like did me saying ‘name please ?’ cause you to freak out or something ?? honestly i’m very curious”

“wELL when it just so happens to be someone looking very cute...yes i did,,,,”

“aWWEEE JISUNG”

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whiskeyandwildfire · 4 years

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Diving off the Mackinaw Bridge at 2am

(Please excuse the tardiness of this entry, I hope the content will serve as an explanation. However, first, I hope you will join me for a little afternoon poetry. If you would like, please listen to this track while reading the following poem aloud at a medium pace)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DXvi1-gjI4A&list=PLkLGtfv9wqNKKRIY95QMUZqFwe_cl3orB&index=6

Getting closer to the edge A gust of wind comes off the straights And seems to push and pull you simultaneously.

And if you are the push I am the pull.

Different paths to the same town Square in the middle of nothing Open past nine and closed on Sundays.

And if you are a paddle boat On old Kitchi-Gummi I am a raft floating too far from shore And long past my bedtime.

Crashing waves wake Us at night and no campfire story Or prescription strength anything Will bring us back down before the sun comes up.

And if you are the sun I am the burn that comes later Unexpected, unwanted, and staying for months

Un-welcomed like a cousin from upstate Who borrows and never returns all of your best dress socks.

Or a song overplayed that you change Or try to change before realizing Music’s all the same today And tomorrow, and next week too.

And if you are the oboe concerto Rising and falling like a lost bird in flight I am the sound of a radio played too high

On a passing car swerving to avoid a chipmunk That’s thinking the same thought at that moment As I am, “How the fuck did I get here?”

And where will I be tomorrow, and tomorrow, and next week too?

But if you are mine I am your’s And that’s all there is.

After the push and the pull After the fall After the water wakes And the sun rises The bird takes flight And the song ends.

After tomorrow, and tomorrow.

ENTRY - Part 1

I’m writing this as I sit next to my father, six hours in to an eight hour trip from Michigan to Pennsylvania. He’s only driven a fourth of the way and already seems tired. The road wobbles and waves beneath the car as he changes lanes without signaling. The mirror I’ve reclaimed from my Grandparents house crashes against the wheel well of the back tire. Surely it’s shattered.

We pull off into the closest rest stop to stretch our legs, switch jobs, and check on the cargo.

“Okay son, don’t make me nervous” he says as I adjust the mirrors and seat back from the hunched over locked in position they’re kept in for his short frame. This is also something he comments on when it’s his turn to move them back.

My dad got into a small accident May 4th of 2019 in the car we drive in. I remember the date because it was the day after my 30th birthday. I got the call that he had slid the car into a rock pile about a block from his house. It had been raining and the brakes needed replacing anyway.

The brake pads and rotors had been gone since winter. In Michigan, the road salt eats away at...well, everything. Down to your spirit and definitely through 4 pieces of cheap foam.

The rain on the day of the accident wasn’t any worse than usual, and were it not for the fact that my dad was also drunk when he crashed it probably could have been avoided all together. Honestly though, when I see him sober it’s hard to tell which is better.

All of these mitigating factors aside, as someone who was voted “Worst Driver in High School” there must be some truth to the expressed concern. Three tickets in six months earned me the title and the almost immediate three month suspension of my license backed up the claim. We won’t mention the fact that two of these tickets were thrown out and the only reason that my license was suspended was because no one would listen to what I had to say, in a large part because I didn’t know how to say it. How to defend myself in matters of the law. Looking back, and with his experiences, you would think Dad being in the court room would have helped.

I change lanes and press down on the gas to no avail. The accelerator misses and the engine revs.

“Don’t make me nervous, Son”

You need to know that not only haven’t I driven in the better part of a year, but also that when I do I’m used to driving at least semi new rental cars. Cars with at least basic capability and safety measures.

“This is not a me, problem.” I respond. “You need new brakes. You need a new car” I stop there, he’s already not listening.

The road wobbles. The mirror crashes.

ENTRY - Part 2

I’m in my apartment now. Bags and luggage unpacked, father gone as quickly as possibly; never one for standing still. Mirror scratched, but in tact. Much like everything else. Little scratches that aren’t my stories to tell. Going through boxes that I collected and transported, mostly from my Mom’s. A special deck of cards, a stack of papers from school, and a present perfectly wrapped.

My Grandpa died in 2009. It was a week before my 21st birthday, I remember this because two weeks before he said to me “ If you don’t tell your Grandma I’ll have a beer with you” Of course I had been a pretty regular consumer since I was 15, but I couldn’t stand to break his heart.

Now, yesterday. Over 10 years later. My Grandpa had one last gift to give me. I’m opening it now. The wrapping paper is for a birthday. There’s no words written and no card. There’s a post-it already removed that says my name and that was the same for my brother and sister. I rip open the first layer and the trapped air inside is freed, blown around my entire body by the overhead fan. I can smell him in the wind. This is not just my mind either, I notice bringing the paper closer to my nose. He must have sprayed his Old Spice on the wrappings before sealing it shut. A gift inside a gift. A part of what made him back on the earth if only for a moment. Inside, a toy truck. An army transport of impressive detail. The kind of truck my Grandpa serviced in WW2. The kind of truck he fixed over and over again, under heavy fire, in a foreign country away from his wife so that he could defend all that was coming to him. Fighting for me without even knowing who I am.

Research - Thesis

Carl Jung was a Swiss psychoanalyst who wanted an answer to the question: “Why do seemingly good people do obviously bad things?”

Jung finally devised an answer in the formulation of the shadow self, the dark side – the side that’s hidden from conscious awareness AND the side that’s metaphorically dark.

Jung’s model of the shadow arises from the human subconscious/unconscious.

“Everyone carries a shadow, and the less it is embodied in the individual’s conscious life, the blacker and denser it is. If an inferiority is conscious, one always has a chance to correct it. Furthermore, it is constantly in contact with other interests, so that it is continually subjected to modifications. But if it is repressed and isolated from consciousness, it never gets corrected.” – Carl Jung, Psychology and Religion

You see…in childhood, we are socialized to behave a certain way, to follow a certain set of rules.

As a child, you know nothing about the world, so it is the responsibility of your caretakers to teach you about the world and its written and unwritten rules. Following these allow us to “fit in” with society and operate as productive citizens and achieve some standard of worldly success. This is the socialization process.

Some of these rules are actually good because they allow a society to function, for many people to enjoy a good standard of living, and lead reasonable lives.

However, “life happens” and many people in Western society (or even the world at large) have not been trained or socialized to face discomforting things that happen in life.

SOURCE

I began this entry with the two contrasting stories to illustrate this point. In my very basic, beginning stages of trying to understand Shadow Work and the Shadow Self that it is important to recognize what behaviors or actions are that of another person, what thoughts or actions are that of you...and more deeply, it is important to recognize what thoughts or actions are yours that cause you discomfort BECAUSE you see them in others.

Example - I don’t like when my father drinks too much because he becomes dismissive and hard to talk to.

Shadow Talk - I don’t like when I drink too much, because of the same reasons.

Example - I don’t like when my father comments on my bad driving that is really the fault of his broken vehicle, which is the result of his poor decisions and lack of accountability.

Shadow Talk - I don’t like when I don’t deal with problems as they arise.

Example - I don’t like that my father can’t communicate with me.

Shadow Talk - I don’t like that I can’t find a way to connect with him.

I also began this entry to illustrate that there are different “gifts” we can receive from people in our lives. Some positive both in the act and the outward appearance of receiving the gift and the actual gift itself, and some negative in appearance, but possibly positive in an unconsidered way. Example, being so uncomfortable and unhappy in a job that you lose interest, get fired, and only months later find your dream job because you were available to apply to it.

Arts Education - Research and updates

I’ve been picking through a report of collected data to help prove efficacy of the Young Playwrights Lab to potential granters, specifically under the new ESSA (Every Single Student Achieves) Act that explicitly details what funding is available, what types of Arts Education programs are eligible, what kind of research or efficacy you must be able to prove, and how much money is available in that section. There are currently 10 different sections of funding. 6 of those require Title III - Title IV level research proof to apply for funding. Here are the definitions from the report.

 Strong evidence (Tier I) comes from study reports that :

Show statistically significant positive

intervention effects on relevant outcomes (without any statistically significant negative effects);

Meet What Works Clearinghouse (WWC) evidence standards without reservations. (What’s this thing?)

Were conducted using a large, multisite sample (i.e., more than 350 students and more than a single school district).

 Moderate evidence (Tier II) comes from study reports that

(a) show statistically significant positive intervention effects on relevant outcomes (without any statistically significant negative effects);

(b) studies that meet WWC evidence standards with reservations;

(c) studies that were conducted using a large, multisite sample (i.e., more than 350 students and more than a single school district). (What’s different between I and II)

 Promising evidence (Tier III) comes from study reports that (a) show statistically significant positive intervention effects on relevant outcomes (without any statistically significant negative effects), and (b) describe correlational studies with statistical controls for selection bias.

 Research-based rationale (Tier IV) evidence comes from study reports that

(a) feature a well specified logic model informed by research or evaluation,

(b) describe interventions that are undergoing additional research regarding their effects

Here is an example from this same report that details an acceptable logic model.

It is my recommendation that for YPL to best take advantage of possible funding opportunities from ESSA that a new logic model should be developed from existing research that is “evidence based” as opposed to “rationale based” (Example, pre and post surveys, attendance statistics of kids participating in YPL, general test scores of those same students V. rationale based research that has more to do with facts we already know but aren’t tracking in the classrooms I.E. Art makes kids happy)

It is also my recommendation that one or more YPL programs for this next school year be chosen as control groups to either follow, or purposefully ignore the current model to test efficacy. Having the contrast to our goal will help illustrate to possible funders the actual impact of the program. This is especially imperative as programs continue online as there might be an opportunity to raise money for a TBD in person set of classes AS WELL as writing for grants to continue the work being done online.

(Thank you for your continued patience and attention during this hefty post)

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probablyrobins · 6 years

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Rule one: tag nine people you want to get to know better. rule one already broken bc im mclazy but like!!! do it if you want :D

tagged by @polymathematical

Rule two: bold the true statements:

I am 5'7 or taller (i am but a wee baby)

I wear glasses

I have at least one tattoo

I have at least one piercing

I have blonde hair

My abs are somewhat defined

I have or had braces

I love meeting new people (most of the time!! but i also get super scared bc Anxiety)

People tell me I’m funny (sometimes?? im decent at like... improv puns)

Helping people with their problems is a big priority to me (yes!!! hello it is i your mom/therapist friend that wants to make sure all of their friends are ok!!!)

I enjoy physical challenges

I enjoy mental challenges

I’m playfully rude to people I know well (sometimes? it depends on the person and their sense of humor!)

I started to say something ironically, now I can’t stop saying it (definitely happened with y’all and probably other words but i cant remember them. yikes. memory status? -1)

There is something I would change about my personality (GOD i wish i was less annoying and bothersome oh my gOSH i talk too much. i dont shut up i swEAR i just start yappin and i dont stop yappin)

I can play an instrument

I can sing well (i mean i took choir for 4 years straight. my voice isnt like good but... im decent?)

I can do 30 push-ups without stopping

I’m a fast runner

I can draw well (i do my heckin best my dude)

I have a good memory (NO NOT AT ALL. -1.)

I’m good at doing Maths in my head

I can hold my breath underwater for over a minute

I have beaten at least two people in an arm wrestle

I know how to cook at least three meals from scratch

I can throw a punch

I enjoy sports

I have learned a new song in the past week

I’ve gone running at least once a week in summer (was this because of the online PE class i took? yes. yes it is.)

I work out at least once a week

I have drawn something in the last month (ya boi has drawn christmas gifts for all of their pals this year!! only if they’re just doodles!!)

I enjoy writing (HEKC YEAH ive gotta work on my book. heck. whoops.)

I have done martial arts

I have had my first kiss

I have had alcohol (it was an accident, to be fair. i thought it was grape juice. i thought wrong.)

I have scored a winning goal in sports

I have watched an entire season of a TV show in one sitting (im 90% sure i’ve done this before but???? once again uhh bad memory)

I have been to an overnight event

I have been in a taxi

I have been in a hospital/er in the past year

I have beaten a video game in one day

I have visited another country (family is always soooo far away D: singapore and brazil, to be specific. its rad but like.... plane flights of doom.)

I have been to one of my favourite band’s concerts

I have at least one person I consider a best friend (HEKC YEAH although sometimes i worry, as i do with all of my friends, that maybe?? they dont consider me a best friend and i panic?? ashdgbahjada im a Dumb)

I live close to my school/university/college

My parents are still together

I have at least one sibling

I live in the US (born in land of the Maple Syrup, however)

There is snow right now where I live (NO THERE ISNT PLEASE PROVIDE SOME SNOW)

I have hung out with friends in the past month

I have a smartphone

I have at least 15 CDs

I share my room with somebody

I have a crush on a celebrity

I have a crush on someone I know

I have been in at least three relationships

I have asked someone out or admitted my feelings to them (i might have when i was ten or eleven?? ive purposefully blocked sixth grade out of my mind)

I get crushes easily

I have had a crush for over a year

I have been in a relationship for more than a year

I have had feelings for a friend

I have break danced

I know a person called Jamie (knew? she doesnt go by it anymore but shes heckin rad 20/10)

I have had a teacher with a last name hard to pronounce

I have dyed my hair (im blue abba dee abba die)

I am listening to a song on repeat right now

I have punched someone in the past week

I have known someone who has gone to jail

I have broken a bone

I have eaten a waffle today

I know what to do with my life

I speak at least 2 languages (i was born knowing portuguese but its slowly fading from my memory??? ++ im in spanish 2 as of now)

I have made a new friend in the last year (HEKC YEAH!!! ive made so many new friends from overwatch and i love them dearly ;0;)

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bfknj · 7 years

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tags masterpost (?)

I was tagged in a few tag games over the past few days and instead of posting them all separately I decided to just put them all on one! If I tagged you feel free to do any or all of these (including people who tagged me!!) As always, don’t feel any pressure to do any, I just think these are fun and wanted to share :)

- - - - 11 questions tag - - - -

Rules: 1. Make sure to post the rules!! 2. Answer the questions given to you by the tagger. 3. Write 11 questions of your own. 4. Tag 11 people

these questions are from @moonmyun !! michaela you had me stRUGGLIN OKAY YOUR QUESTIONS WERE HARD but ily still bless you for the tag you angel :”)

1 who is your bias group? why?

BANGTAN SONYEONDAN AKA MEME SQUAD !!!!!!! honestly they just make me so beyond happy wow holly nobody ever says that about their favs ur original a LOOOT of music is centered around love these days and not to say bts doesn’t do that with a lot of their music but they also tackle a lot of societal issues and I really respect them for that. From 21st century girls w politics, spring day mv and the ferry sinking, suicide in the I need u mv and many other things I feel like they take risks for the sake of portraying what they hold true to their hearts/morals not necessarily what will sell best and I can’t name many other groups who do that as well :( also my boys cute af I love those dweebs IM SO WHIPPED HAH

2 which kpop video do you find the most aesthetically pleasing?

this is hard :(( idk my number one but I really like seventeen hip hop unit’s check in, red velvet’s one of these nights, ladies code’s galaxy, kim lip of loona’s eclipse and crush’s fall ! they don't all match my aesthetic but I feel like they match the songs really well!!! watch them okay 3/5 of them are hELLA UNDERRATED bye

3 if you could instantly learn one choreography, what would you pick?

something by either gfriend or bts?? love whisper or not today or blood sweat tears?? OOOH or red flavor by rv!! tbh though I’m really skinny so my limbs look weird af with a lot of dances rip

4 who do you look up to as a role model (in the kpop community or not)?

there’s no person in particular that really sticks out but I will say I’ve always admired jungkook, and really all trainees for that matter, who leave their families to start training really young because its a process thats hard physically, emotionally and mentally for late teen/early twenties trainees but there’s sO many kids who enter in their pre-teens and idk how they survive also I realized this doesn’t answer your question at all I'm sorry its 1:28 AM I’m just waiting for the DNA mv to drop

5 whose concert would you go to if you could and why?

DAY6 DAY6 DAY6 DAY6 !!!!! THEY INVENTED LIVE SHOWS DONT FIGHT ME ON THIS or shoot maybe dean or crush or heize?? I LOVE TOO MANY TALENTED PEOPLE also I would say bts but although there are countless amazing beautiful armys there are def some crazy scary ones that are known to be horrible at concerts so

6 if you could pick one idol to be best friends with, who would it be and why?

OK YALL IVE THOUGHT ABOUT THIS A LOT IN MY DAILY LIFE SO S/H TO MICHAELA FOR ASKING ILY either boo seungkwan or ahn heeyeon!! I feel like hani would be so fun to have girl time with bc I feel like we’re really similar in some ways ?? IDK I LOVE HER bUT overall I’d say boo seungkwan because istg we are 100000000% the same person only he has a weenie ok just trust me I am boo and boo is me

7 would you want to be a part of a kpop group if you had the opportunity to be?

I’d absolutely love to be in the entertainment industry and I think the staging, costuming, group dynamics and publicity (variety shows, fan service/interations) in the kpop industry are all really cool but I honestly don't think I have the mental strength to do it lmao idols go through so much and I don’t think I could handle it regardless of how much I enjoy singing/dancing/performing etc.

8 what languages do you speak, and which do you want to learn?

english and some spanish??? I understand a lot because quite a bit of my family speaks it but my conversational skills have gone downhill recently because I haven’t had a lot of opportunities to practice :( with that said, I’d like to be fluent in spanish and - BEFORE YOU COME FOR ME READ IT ALL OK - I’d like to learn korean BECAUSE!!!!! when I was little before I moved I would go to a farmers market by my house and a lot of the older ladies there spoke korean and little holly though it sounded so pretty and I always wanted to chat w them ok THATS WHY I’m not a creepy koreaboo this has been a thing since before I even knew what a kpop was ok bye

9 what song cheers you up when you’re sad?

fire by bts bc I get hella turnt to that song its a pROBLEM also jackpot by block b, baby/puss in boots by astro, chained up by vixx, not today/bst by bts, knock knock by twice, i think I love you by sonamoo THE LIST GOES ON I HAVE A WHOLE PLAYLIST OK

10 what things do you associate with your bias?

dimples!! pretty hands, closing one eye in selcas, ootds, happiness so cheesy ik sORRY, ryan, studying, awkward dancing, open mouth laughs, second hand embarrassment, sentimental rants

11 what’s your favourite thing to do in your free time?

cry over namjoon tbh I’m one of those people who is constantly listening to music so I’m always doing that and singing along regardless of if its free time or not HAH then I really like reading and catching up on my youtube subscriptions

my questions!

what is your dream job?

favorite book of all time?

what is your current fashion like and what is your dream fashion?

if your best friend was cloned, how would you know which one of the two was your best friend?

what song got you into kpop?

which idol do you think is most similar to you?

favorite kpop lyrics?

if given the opportunity to collaborate with any group/soloist of your choice, who would you choose and why?

what is your favorite physical and character trait of your ult?

which underrated groups/soloists do you believe deserve more recognition? any song recs?

do you read fanfics? if so, what are your favorites?

- - - - song title game - - - -

I was tagged by @kihani, your song choices were 12/10

rules: spell you your url with kpop songs and tag ten people! (all of these happen to by song recs too so listen nd be happy friends)

mysterious - hello venus

i think i love you? - sonamoo (a fav ok listen pls)

life in color - beenzino

knock - knk

jelly - hotshot

only u - daze

out of sorts - vixx

night rather than day - exid

she’s a baby - zico

- - - - get to know me tag! - - - -

1ST RULE: Tag 10 people you want to get to know better.

2ND RULE: BOLD the statements that are true. tagged by @sleepysugarmoon, thank you friend!! APPEARANCE: I am 5'7" or taller I wear glasses (or contact lenses) I have at least one tattoo I have at least one piercing I have blonde hair I have brown eyes I have short hair My abs are at least somewhat defined I have or have had braces PERSONALITY: I love meeting new people People tell me that I’m funny Helping others with their problems is a big priority for me I enjoy physical challenges I enjoy mental challenges I’m playfully rude with people I know well I started saying something ironically and now I can’t stop saying it ABILITY: I can sing well I can play an instrument I can do over 30 pushups without stopping I’m a fast runner I can draw well I have a good memory I’m good at doing math in my head I can hold my breath underwater for over a minute I have beaten at least 2 people in arm wrestling I know how to cook at least 3 meals from scratch I know how to throw a proper punch HOBBIES: I enjoy playing sports I’m on a sports team at my school or somewhere else I’m in an orchestra or choir at my school or somewhere else I have learned a new song in the past week I work out at least once a week I’ve gone for runs at least once a week in the warmer months I have drawn something in the past month Fandoms are my #1 passion I do or have done martial arts EXPERIENCES: I have had my first kiss I have had alcohol I have scored the winning goal in a sports game I have watched an entire season of a TV show in one sitting I have been at an overnight event I have been in a taxi I have been in the hospital or ER in the past year I have beaten a video game in one day I have visited another country I have been to one of my favorite band’s concerts RELATIONSHIPS: I’m in a relationship I have a crush on a celebrity I have a crush on someone I know I have been in at least 3 relationships I have never been in a relationship I have asked someone out or admitted my feelings to them I get crushes easily I have had a crush on someone for over a year I have been in a relationship for at least a year I have had feelings for a friend MY LIFE: I have at least one person I consider a “best friend” I live close to my school My parents are still together I have at least one sibling I live in the United States There is snow right now where I live I have hung out with a friend in the past month I have a smartphone I have at least 15 CDs I share my room with someone RANDOM SHIT: I have breakdanced I have had a teacher with the last name that’s hard to pronounce I have dyed my hair I’m listening to one song on repeat right now I have punched someone in the past week I know someone who has gone to jail I have broken a bone I have eaten a waffle today I know what I want to do with my life I speak at least 2 languages I have made a new friend in the past year

tagging some mutuals bc ily and why do you even follow me I'm a wreck tbh OK i tag: @kihani, @21jd, @lapatronakim, @94seulqi, @gayoongi, @springdqy, @medina-kim, @15minss, @je0n, @cottontae, @taebaeul, @booty-baekery, @lalisl, @babekhyun, @voidpjm and anyone else who wants to try any or all of these!!

#i love tags yayayay #don't feel like you have to do it!!#tags

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megabadbunny · 7 years

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Rose x Ten, post GitF-au/fixit; angst, fluff, romance, more angst, and possibly some smut later, but this part (and all parts on ff.net) is sfw (minor exception for brief language).

(see the end of this part for notes and special thanks)

(full-size image)

Minuet, Part II

Twisting in his grasp, Rose cranes her neck to look at him, finally, and there he is, all furrowed brow and tight mouth and eyes glittering with anger, and god, if she wasn’t so irritated with him right now, she just might kiss him.

“That’s what you were going to do, isn’t it?” she asks instead.

***

Eyes widening, the Doctor only has a moment to let his mouth drop open in surprise before another gentleman steps in—time to change dance partners. Rose slips into position with the newcomer without so much as a blink or even a glance in the Doctor’s direction, never faltering in her rhythm; a quick peek at the Doctor moments later tells her that he has allowed himself to be swept up in the tide of dancers, sidling up to his new partner across the room. Rose turns away, swirling in her partner’s arms, but she can feel the eyes of the Doctor boring into her. She shivers despite the summer heat. “That’s beside the point,” he whispers when they meet again, touching palm-to-palm first with one hand, then the other. “I’m a Time Lord.” “Really? First I’ve heard of it,” Rose replies drily.

“I’ve been doing this for a long time, Rose. A very long time. I understand the risks.” Rose rolls her eyes. “And stupid apes don’t.” At least the Doctor has the decency to flinch at those words. “That isn’t what I meant.” “Of course it is,” Rose sighs, and they both step back, granting a berth for other dancers to flit gracefully between them. “After all,” Rose continues when they reconnect, hands clasped, “I’m hardly one of the most accomplished women who ever lived, am I?”

Anger yields briefly to confusion, and the Doctor frowns. “What?” “It’s all right, Doctor—well, no, it’s not all right, it’s actually sort of disappointing,” Rose admits. “But I’ve had a lot of time to think about it, not to mention I’ve spent loads of time with Reinette. She’s pretty fantastic, actually. Did you know she’s personally acquainted with Voltaire? He wrote in her salon, she influenced some of his best work.” Rose chuckles quietly to herself. “Who am I kidding? Of course you knew that. “You know, we didn’t get on that well at first,” she continues, smiling as the two of them glide around the room, Rose’s skirts swishing and flicking about her ankles. “She thought I was sort of uncultured, and I thought she was a fancy poncy git with her head stuck up her gold-gilded arse. But she helped me anyway. Absolutely heaped praise on me after I stopped those androids—all I did was talk to ‘em, but she was grateful anyway! She could’ve just chucked me out on the street when all that was over—god knows that’s what some people wanted, they didn’t like the idea of this weird English girl in their court and they were pretty loud about it—but Reinette wouldn’t hear of it, stood up to ‘em like it was nothing. She stuck up for me, smoothed things over with everyone, talked the other ladies-in-waiting into showing me the ropes around here. Even got me some land and a title so I could be at court properly. I’m the Marquise de Powell now. Never thought I’d have a title, growing up on the Estate. Now I’ve got two! What’ll Mum think?” The Doctor is silent, the expression on his face inscrutable. Rose fights not to squirm beneath his gaze. “Anyway,” she says, her voice softening. “Reinette really is remarkable. It’s no wonder you were willing to do all that for her. She’d be well worth it even if she wasn’t so important to history.” “Well worth what?” “You know,” says Rose, and she twirls along with all of the other women in the court in a flurry of skirts and silk. The men all draw their partners in, and is Rose imagining it, or does the Doctor pull her just a little closer than all the rest? “Getting stuck,” she says finally. “Trapped without the TARDIS. Reinette would be worth it. You two are a great match.” The Doctor’s jaw tenses, his lips pressing together as if fighting to keep his words inside. Her steps faltering, Rose doesn’t even realize the Doctor has stopped dead in his tracks until his hands tighten around her waist—a reflexive move to stop her from tumbling to the floor. But he doesn’t say anything; he just glares. When another gentleman steps in for the next partner change, the Doctor’s eyes flash and before Rose knows it, his fingers have wrapped around her wrist so he can pull her away from the crowd. “What—” Concentration swallows the rest of Rose’s words as she trips over her skirts, dodges a dancer in the outer line, apologizes for bumping into a servant hovering at the periphery of the ballroom. But the Doctor doesn’t let up his pace; if anything, he strides more purposefully, leading Rose away from the noise and light of the court down the dark and quiet corridor beyond. “What are you doing?” Rose tries again when they’re alone. “Taking you home,” is his curt reply. “You mean the TARDIS.” “No.” Rose’s blood freezes in her veins. Now it’s her turn to halt in her tracks. She yanks her wrist out of the Doctor’s grasp, stumbling back in disbelief. He doesn’t turn around. Doesn’t look at her. (Just as well, really; she doesn’t want him to see the look of horror plastered across her face.) “Sorry,” says Rose, once she can find her voice again. “Sorry, I think I misheard you just now. Sort of sounded like you said you were gonna send me back home.” He doesn’t reply. Rose swallows. “No,” she says, willing her words not to quaver and shake. “No, you don’t get to do that to me. I get a say in this. I didn’t jump through that mirror and strand myself in the fucking Renaissance for half a year just so you could drop me like a sack of moldy potatoes or strand me in bloody Aberdeen!” “Why did you do it?” the Doctor asks quietly, his fists clenching at his sides as his shoulders knit themselves into a harsh line. He’s all angles and edges now, sharp and brittle and ready to puncture. Rose tries to remember the last time she saw him like this, realizes it was back when he was a different man, all black leather and marble-schooled features. Even though he can’t see it, Rose shrugs. “Somebody had to fix history!” “Didn’t have to be you.” “Who else was it gonna be? Couldn’t be Mickey—he hasn’t been doing this long enough. Besides, his French is even worse than mine.” “It was supposed to be me,” the Doctor says sharply, turning to face her. “Yeah, and then what would Mickey and I have done?” Rose asks. “Just sat on that spaceship for god knows how long, surrounded by all those dead bodies? Activate Emergency Program One and just leave you stranded three thousand years in the past?” “You really don’t think I would have made it back to you?” “Maybe with Reinette here, you wouldn’t have even tried.” The Doctor rolls his eyes. “Don’t be stupid.” “Wow,” Rose breathes, crossing her arms snugly across her middle. She tells herself the pain in her chest is just the corset, wringing all of the air out of her after the dance; either way, it feels like all of the oxygen has left the room. “I mean, it’s not like I expected an award or a kiss or a prize or anything, but a thank you would have been nice, or at least a hug. I haven’t seen you in months.” “Which wouldn’t have happened if you,” the Doctor bites back, pointing an accusatory finger at her, “hadn’t acted so recklessly.” “I mean, I’m sorry I ruined your chance to play hero or whatever, but would it kill you to act like I did a good job here?” Rose asks. “It’s not like I did anything you wouldn’t do, but you stomp in here, all anger and nastiness and Oncoming Storm like I twisted a bunch of timelines together or chipped the paint on the TARDIS. I don’t know, maybe half a year doesn’t seem that long to you, certainly not long enough to care about.” “Now, that’s not fair—I never said—” “Yeah, I bet you were just gnawing off your fingernails with concern,” Rose snaps. “You know, if you were really that worried, there are better ways to show it.” The Doctor’s eyes avert from hers, his gaze falling heavily to the floor. Silence falls around them, so thick Rose could almost touch it. When the Doctor doesn’t respond, doesn’t move, doesn’t even seem to breathe, for several endless moments, Rose starts to wonder what could have gotten into him. Then she realizes. “Oh,” she says softly, an epiphany slowly blossoming through her thoughts. “Maybe you were really that worried.” “We should go,” the Doctor mutters, turning on his heel. Stunned, Rose can’t summon the words to argue with him—Please don’t take me home, at least let me say goodbye to my friends first, please just talk to me, please—they all just drift around uselessly, unable to climb their way out of her throat. Silently, she follows after him.

***

Next: Part III

***

A very special super thanks to @gingergallifreyan @pellaaearien @zoebelle9 @arynrds @epicgm @littleredrobyn @perserveringpolyglot @ladydiomede @desilluist @schi-walker-locked @wanderlust-killjoy @unknowntome @leabharlannkay @hellagoodtea @thedoctorandrosefanfics @greatbigouterspacedunce @abadplanwellexecuted @jem-scribbles @stupidsatsuma @hellostarlight20 @travelingrose @wordsintimeandspace @deriverose @asmilelikestarlight @chiaroscuroverse @postal-willshipeverything @perfectlyrose @curiositykilledtheslug @fadewithfury @goingtothetardis @lostinfic and absolutely anyone and everyone who has left nice comments and tags on this fic and art--you all gave me the oomph to keep going in a time when I’m really struggling with writer’s block! So, many many many thanks to you all! <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

#ficandchips #tenrose #ten/rose #tenxrose #post-gitf #also if anyone is concerned about the ending and doesn't mind spoilers:#this will of course have a happy ending #i mean there's some angst to get through and whatnot #but still: happy fluffy gushy ending in the works #srsly though thank you to everyone who read and reblogged and said nice things #makes a girl feel all warm and misty-eyed #<3 #also i've got like...25% of the rest written #so #progress whoo #and also i'm working on the prompts that i've received #and no place like hohm #basically yours truly is a busy little bee #AND SHE LOVES IT #:DDD #also it feels weirdly fitting that this is getting posted on the last day of my twenties #nice to get a little bit of writing done in this last part of the decade #a new decade for me starts tomorrow!#also also my feet are cold and these tags are going nowhere #so in summation #nitwit!#blubber!#oddment!#tweak!

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dipifica · 7 years

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need help/new story!

hey everyone!!! i know ive been m.i.a. when it comes to the fanfic scene but i have the first chapter of a new story and its......a 10 things i hate about you au! i love this movie a ton and really love the idea so i thought i would try it out! under the read more below is the first draft of chapter 1! i dont usually do this but i would totally appreciate any comments or suggestions on this first chapter (also if you want more/would read until the end, etc.) since im busy and have been having personal problems i feel it would help me be motivated if people were interested! this is a rough draft so things can change but for sure couples are dippica (dipper/pacifica) and wenbel (wendy/mabel) ages are moved around as well but only so i can have the whole gang in high school at once. anyways yeah! please tell me what you think!

Wendy Corduroy adjusted her baseball cap for the final time before deciding that, eh, that will do. She had never been one for nervousness, frankly she considered herself to be one of the chillest people she knew (except around family, but who was stress-free around their family ever?), but today was a brand new day full of brand new people in a brand new place.

Wendy and her family has moved to Gravity Falls only a month ago because the work was good for her lumberjack father. With the world moving faster and faster everyday, Wendy’s father couldn’t seem to keep up and decided a quieter, more rustic town would do well for the entire family. Luckily, the Corduroy children weren’t incredibly disappointed. Wendy was a starting her senior year somewhere new, but she tried to look on the bright side. If she loved it here, she will be happy, and if she hated it, hey, she’s in college next year anyway.

She got an E-Mail the night before instructing her about the school’s transfer policy, each transfer student would be assigned another student to lead them around the school, answer questions, and be a “friend” although Wendy knew well that the school couldn’t make her be friends with anyone. Still, she thought it was somewhat unnecessary, the school wasn’t huge and she was a senior, the last thing she needed was to look lame asking someone younger than her about her school.

“Name, please?” A man asked her as she approached the main office.

“Wendy Corduroy.” She stated, the school was a lot smaller than her last with far less students. Maybe her adventure would turn out to be a dud after all.

“Gideon Gleeful?” The man called to a group of student leaders. Wendy turned to see no one answer, than out from the corner a boy with white hair, dressed business-casual stood up.

“Yes, sir!” He replied.

“Your transfer. Wendy Corduroy, this is Gideon. Gideon, Wendy.”

“Nice to meet you.” Wendy shook the boy’s hand thinking how he even looked too young to be in high school.

“To you as well.” Gideon replied.

“If you have any questions, Gideon will answer them for you. Now, go ahead and start the tour. Next in line?”

“Right this way, Ms. Corduroy.” Gideon exclaimed.

“Wendy is fine, thanks. You are…..chipper.” Wendy chuckled. “If you don’t mind me asking…how old are you?”

“I’m 15 years old!” Gideon seemed to get somewhat angry. “I’m a sophomore this year at GFHS and I am so sick of people asking my age…” He muttered.

“I’m sorry, dude.” Wendy apologized. “You know, it’s good to look youthful.”

Gideon sighed. “Not when you are trying to get a girlfriend. Well, let’s start the tour anyway, you are gonna need a lot of help from me!” Gideon perked up and started his journey down the south east hall, Wendy trailing behind him.

—

“And that wraps up the English department. Next we have-“

“Gideon, can we just end the tour here? I think I’ll figure it out.” Wendy slumped over and sat down in front of a locker. Her feet killed as Gideon insisted on taking the stairs everywhere.

“We have so much more to see, Wendy!” Gideon exclaimed. “We still have the art wing, the back alley, the make out tree!”

“I really think I’ll catch on.” Wendy sighed and hung her head.

“‘Cuse me?” A perky, girl’s voice called from above. Wendy pulled her head back to see a beautiful young girl. “So sorry to bug you but you are blocking my locker.”

“I-uh…yeah. No, I’m sorry.” Wendy picked herself off and moved out of the pretty girl’s way.

“Hey, don’t be!” She smiled. “Are you new? I’ve never seen you around before.”

“Yeah, I am. Wendy Corduroy.” Wendy stuck her hand out.

“Mabel Pines!” Mabel trapped her hand and shook. Her hands were soft in Wendy’s and Wendy suddenly felt light as a feather. “You’ll love it here. Always something going on.” Mabel grabbed the book she needed from her locker and shut it. “I gotta go, but it was great meeting you, Wendy Corduroy!”

“You too, Mabel Pines.” Wendy replied, her heart dancing inside her. She usually wasn’t one for love at first sight but…wow. Mabel smiled once more and turned to join two other girls waiting on the corner for her.

“Don’t push your luck with her.” Gideon snapped Wendy out of her love-filled day dream. “Mabel Pines doesn’t date. Not allowed in fact.”

“Oh really, why is that?” Wendy asked, eyes still on the beautiful junior before her.

“Protective parents. You know, I even heard she’s not allowed to date until her brother does.”

“Brother?” Wendy questioned.

“Twin brother, Dipper Pines. Basically the biggest dork this school has ever seen.” Gideon chuckled.

“That’s not you?”

“Watch it newbie.” Gideon glared. “No one will go out with him.”

“Hey, can you do me a favor?” Wendy batted her eyelashes.

“Ugh, Dipper is straight and so am I.” Gideon groaned. “And we aren’t that close yet, sister. Maybe you could…”

“Hi,very gay.” Wendy responded. “Plus, I’d feel bad…”

“But you were ready to throw me into the ring, huh?”

“Look, there’s gotta be some way to get her brother a date and get her to…is she gay?” Wendy asked, deciding in the moment it would be best to get that settled before she devised any schemes.

“Heard through the grapevine she’s had summer camp flings with girls and guys. So bi?” Gideon shrugged.

—-

“Ladies!” Gideon called over to two girls who did not look pleased to see him. Wendy trailed behind, listening in on the conversation.

“What do you want Gideon?” The larger girl sighed.

“Just a quick question, Mabel, straight or…?”

“She’s not into you.” The smaller girl rolled her eyes. “She can’t date, you know this better than anyone.”

“Right, right, right, that was last year. I actually am on the market for someone new.” He winked to them, which they groaned and turned their backs to him in response. “So she is or?”

“Bi, weirdo!” One yelled back.

“Wait like, she’s bi, or like goodbye to me?” Gideon yelled back.

“Like she’s bi, idiot!”

“Okay, thanks!” Gideon scurried back over to Wendy who was now crouched behind a trash can.

“You had a thing for her? Should I be worried?”

“Last year, Wendy. Last year.” He waved his hand in the air. “Although Mabel did at one time own my heart, she made it clear even if she was to date…it wouldn’t be me.”

Wendy placed a hand on his shoulder. “I have your blessing?”

“Yeah, but you have to help me find a lady of my own now.”

Wendy laughed. “Okay. In the meantime, tell me more about Dipper Pines.”

—-

Wendy and Gideon sat at the table across from Dipper’s, watching him read a book that was in a language Wendy could not understand. “Damn, you really weren’t kidding. No friends?”

“Dipper can come off as a know-it-all jerkface.” Gideon whispered. “Half of the student body thinks he’s an weirdo nerd, the other half is afraid of him.”

“Afraid of him?”

“He’s got an interest in the paranormal. Really freaky shit.”

“I mean, that’s not that weird…”

“He’s had a few incidents at school…” Wendy raised an eyebrow. “Look, by now you know Gravity Falls isn’t exactly a normal town, we are home to some weird, unexplainable stuff. Dipper…exploits it. Brings it to school. We’ve basically had a lot of lockdowns because of him. Even his perfect grades couldn’t keep him out of multiple suspensions, and causing mass panic every few months doesn’t make him that popular.”

“Damn.” Wendy breathed. “So finding someone to date this guy is going to be…”

“Impossible? Yes.”

“No one comes to mind? Come on Gid, there’s gotta be someone willing and desperate!” Wendy whisper-screamed. “Maybe someone we can even blackmail?”

Gideon perked up and suddenly smiled widely. “Oh, I have just the person. This tour is about to get way more fun than what I expected.”

—

“Her?” Wendy asked. “She’s gorgeous.”

“And my only lead.” Gideon muttered. “Play it cool.”

“I always do!” Wendy scoffed as she followed Gideon towards the beautiful blonde standing at her locker.

“Pacifica Northwest, how are you?” Gideon greeted. The girl visibly sighed and rolled her eyes.

“Gleeful, a new school year is not going to make me forget how big of a weirdo you are. Move along.” She spat.

Gideon let out a chuckle and Wendy caught on he was most certainly enjoying this. “Actually, darling,” He grinned. “I think you should be a bit nicer to me from now on.”

“Psh. Why would I ever show you any sort of kindness? Get lost.” She slammed her locker and started to move away.

“Welcome to Posh Burger, can I interest you in some fries today?” Gideon stated simply, still grinning, causing Pacifica to stop dead in her tracks.

“No. Way.” She muttered, turning back. “Listen, you-“

“No, you listen.” Gideon interrupted, pulling out his phone revealing multiple pictures of Pacifica working at a burger joint. “I’ve got proof here that Miss Gravity Falls herself, works at Posh Burger two towns over. What happened Paz? Daddy ran out of money?”

“That is none of your business! And this right now, is just about the creepiest thing you have ever done!” Pacifica rose her voice. “Delete them.”

“The students of GFHS have a right to know what their homecoming queen does on the weekends. It would take one simple click…”

“What do you want? Is that what this is, some sort of blackmail?”

“Gideon, maybe we shouldn’t-“ Wendy started, not wanting to ruin some junior’s life on her first day.

“Wendy, you are new around here, but trust me, 85% of the school population would expose this brat the second they could. I’m a saint.” Gideon turned his attention back to the blonde. “It is a blackmail thing. We want you to take Dipper Pines out on a date.”

“He’s even worse than you.” Pacifica sighed. “Why would you ever care about Dipper Pines’ dating experience?”

“Wendy’s got a thing for Mabel Pines. Mabel doesn’t date until Dipper does. It’s simple really. You date Dipper, Wendy woos Mabel, and these pictures stay safe with me. In return, Wendy’s basically my slave and you have to date Dipper in the first place. Satisfying enough for me.”

Wendy shrugged and for the first time wondered what she was getting herself into.

“You’re cruel. This is going to ruin me.” Pacifica sighed.

“I think these pictures will more so.”

“Maybe I’ll take my chances.” Pacifica glared.

“No, wait! I’ll-uh-I’ll pay you for every date.” Wendy offered.

“Corduroy, what’s the deal?” Gideon whispered.

“I’m starting a new job over the weekend. I’ll pay you for every date you take him on. And-And we won’t leak the pictures. Deal?” Wendy stuck her hand out for a handshake.

Pacifica eyed her hand, then eyed Gideon who’s finger hovered over a send button. “…Deal.” She shook her hand. “Gideon, you just made it to the top of my shit list.”

“I’m humbled.” Gideon put on hand on his heart. “As an added bonus, I’ll be your information guide. Dipper usually hangs around Lab 324 after school, I think. Best to start the courting early.”

Pacifica cringed. “Whatever.” Pacifica finally got to storm away without interruption and as soon as she knew she was alone, she let out a frustrated scream.

——-

Pacifica paced outside Lab 324, she peeked her head through the small window and saw Dipper Pines sitting with headphones in and writing quickly in his notebook. She didn’t know why she felt so nervous. She tried to convince herself it was the fact this guy had almost destroyed the school and town multiple times, but she knew what it truly was, and feared fulfilling Wendy and Gideon’s task would be far harder than seducing just any nerd. This wasn’t just some nerd, it was Dipper Pines. The Dipper Pines that helped her a few years ago and showed her how horrible her parents could be. She now had to face, trick, and lead on the one who believed she could be better. She was going to prove his belief in her wrong all over again.

She thought back to the photos and sighed. It’s just this one guy. She thought. It’s not like he is a saint either. She recalled all the mean things he said about her that same day of the party.

The memory drove her to finally open the door, alerting Dipper to turn and pull his earphones out. “Pacifica.” He stated, he didn’t seem confused as to why she was there.

“Hey, Dipper.” She said, awkwardly strutting in and leaning on the table next to him. “How have you been?”

“Oh, so now you’ll talk to me?” He spat right away. Pacifica hoped he would be polite and act as if they had no past, but no one was around them to fake for.

“Don’t be like that, I was just a kid-“

“Just a kid two years ago when you refused to acknowledge my existence in front of your popular friends.”

“A lot can change in two years.”

“Yeah, but not that much.”

“Dipper, come on, I know I’ve been a real jerk to you in the past, but I was wondering if you wanted to hang out sometime. You know, like old times?”

Dipper stared into Pacifica’s eyes. “…What do you want?”

“To hang out with you.”

“No, what do you want? You choose now to suddenly rekindle our…semi-friendship almost four years after the fact? Is there another ghost in the manor?”

“No, I want to hang out, Dipper. I’m sorry if you felt like I ditched you.”

“I didn’t feel any way, you did ditch me.”

Pacifica remained silent, backed into a corner by Dipper’s words. She couldn’t argue it wasn’t true, the two had connected, even if it was a short time. By the time freshmen year pulled around, Pacifica learned fast how to survive in a bigger school: cut off the people that didn’t fit in.

“You know I’m right. You are so easy to read.” Dipper scoffed, packed up his things, and left the room.

Pacifica was left standing on her own, feeling guilty and frustrated.

#writing #dipifica #dippica #dipcifica #wenbel #rough draft

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cheerscafe · 7 years

Text

Limerence (OumaSai fic) Chapter 2 posted!

I finally... finished this chapter... holy crud it’s more than twice as long as the first... I suffered but I pulled through! Please enjoy! :D

Chapter 2: Growing Roots

Word Count: 7,377

Warnings: None, mentions of bullying again and features a comatose patient. Be safe!

Fanart that inspired the chapter: Official art inspired the chapter this time (you’ll know which one). So instead take this beautiful Au fanart by @tryingtowhisper! I love it so much if anyone does any fanart of fic of this au pls hmu immediately. Please reblog from them! https://tryingtowhisper.tumblr.com/post/156296579488/ill-take-your-heart-like-you-did-mine-in

AO3 Link

Chapter 1 3 4

(*´∇｀)ﾉ Fic under cut!

"Hello, mother." Saihara walked into the empty room, sitting in a chair pulled up beside a bed. His mother lay still, her bony arms hooked up to tubes and IVs, a steady monitor beeping periodically nearby. Her face was shallow and pale as the fog of a winter morning. Her eyes were still shut, no matter how much Saihara wished they would open. Saihara placed his bag down and started recalling his day. After Ouma had left him in the classroom, he had to rush to get on the train. The trip took half an hour, and after the train stopped he had to walk for a while to reach the local hospital. The nurses greeted him as he walked through the hallways to his mother's room in the comatose ward. His time with her would have to be cut a bit short since he had to search for his hat, but it would be enough. Seeing his lively mother reduced to a shell of a what she had been was never easy. Saihara's eyes would play tricks on him. He'd think he'd see her hand twitch only to see that it hadn't. His mind would tell him she was smiling, only for his vision to tell him otherwise. Saihara thought that his hopes would stop tainting the cold reality eventually, but it never did. It had been months. Saihara settled in the chair and took a breath before beginning. "I started school today, mother. The people at the academy are kind. I think you would have liked them." Back when his mother was on her feet, she would always encourage him to mingle with other children. Saihara would have much preferred to sit in the reading corner, but her insistence always made him try. She would remember all the names he told her, all the fun games he played, all the books he read, and all the crayon drawings he made for her. She hung every one of them on the walls and on the fridge. She had been a sun in his life. In her absence all that was left was a dark night sky filled with stars and brief flashes, but nothing as bright. Saihara continued. "The new town is wonderful too. The streets are clean and people seem happier than where we were before. It's... so much better." Saihara and his father had moved to the new town in order to take care of her. After months of care the hospital in their old town had decided that they were discontinuing the comatose patient ward due to lack of funding. All patients who had been there longer than a month were no longer provided for. His father had been heartbroken. Ever since the day she was admitted his father had tightly held onto the belief that she would wake up. Every day he came in during his lunch break to give her new flowers. He worked overtime to pay for her hospital bills. Saihara had believed she would wake up in the beginning as well but... he was starting to lose hope. Saihara looked out the window to the setting sun. It was beautiful, and not as painful as looking at the person beside him. "The library there is well-stocked. It reaches up three stories, can you believe it? It's quite different from the cramped library we used to visit on the weekends." Saihara looked at her face. The scars of the car accident had long healed, but traces of them still remained. Months of seeing her like this had not changed how out-of-place the scars looked on her forehead. The crash had involved a truck ramming head-on to his mother's car, the impact slamming her head against the windshield and dislodging her seatbelt. The medics had found her on the ground, head drenching the pavement with blood. Even with quick-to-respond hospital staff and a medical center a few blocks away, only so much could be done. When Saihara and his dad had arrived, she lay deathly pale and unmoving. Breathing, but still. She had not woken up since. The doctors they had spoken to had done their best. Her brain is simply too damaged, they had said. She was lucky to have survived. She may never wake up. Saihara was inconsolable. Word went around the school about what had happened his classmates all but jumped on the opportunity. He was too mournful to put up a fight anymore. If Saihara wasn't an easy target for bullying before, he certainly was now. The attacks were relentless. Instead of sneers and insults, he received harsh shoves into his locker, thick fingers yanking his hair, and sharpie scribbles all over his desk. Occaisonally a peer would add a crude drawing to match the memorabilia of their enmity. Telling the teachers did nothing. They all assured him that 'Boys are just at that age,' and that 'The girls at this school would never say such a thing,' and 'Aren't you overreacting?'. After the first few attempts of alerting authorities, Saihara stopped trying. He feared the retribution from his bullies for tattling far more than he longed for any "help" his teachers would offer him at that point. His only solace was his walk directly from school to the hospital after the day. He would sit next to his mother's bedside and just talk; about his dad, about his classes, about the flowers he saw blooming on his way to school. Anything to take his mind off the fact that she was comatose and silent and not here with me. Saihara looked back at the window and to the clock. The last touches of orange from the sky were fading. He would have to go soon. Saihara took hold of his mother's hand. It was cold and dry. "I... wish you were here, mother," he whispered. "Things would be so much better with you here." He packed up his things and paused faced her. "Please wake up soon." He looked at her figure from the doorway for a long time before leaving the room.

—

Stepping through the doorway Saihara sighed, exhaustion catching up to him. It really had been a long day. He slipped off his shoes and made his way over to the common area. The apartment was small. Two bedrooms for his father and him, along with a bathroom and a kitchenette attached to the living area. It would seem cosy for some, but Saihara welcomed it's simplicity. It felt like a break compared to the chaos of moving. He noticed a note on the table and picked it up. Shuuichi, Gone to work overtime. Be sure to eat and get to bed on time. Love, Dad Saihara set down the note and began to make dinner. He'd later put the leftovers in their refrigerator for his father to eat. By the time Saihara had eaten dinner, cleaned up, done his homework, and settled into bed, his father still hadn't returned home.

—

"Thank you for showing me around, Gokuhara-kun." "Well, thank you for coming to talk to Gonta!" Saihara, though a bit confused by his manner of speaking, was glad he had taken Gokuhara up on his offer. The gardens were bursting with life, green filling his vision. It was a wonder the school could afford such an expanse of land for just a garden. Really, Saihara thought, how much funding does this school have? He continued. "Even so, Gokuhara-kun, I really appreciate it. Every day I am surprised with what this school has to offer." "Of course! Saishuu Academy prides itself in all matters of study!" Gokuhara beamed. The two continued walking the cobblestone path in the garden. The scenery changed from flowers to ferns to exotic trees. The two were just passing a collection of hydrangea bushes when- "Stop where you are, Saihara-kun!" Saihara gasped, "Gokuhara-kun?!" Gokuhara had placed a broad arm in front of Saihara's path, halting him in his steps. He then stooped right to where Saihara had been about to step and picked up what looked to be a tiny beetle walking along the cobblestone path. "You almost killed this beetle Saihara-kun!" He admonished with a ferocity Saihara had previously thought impossible for his well-mannered classmate. "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't see..." Gokuhara seemed to accept this apology with a nod and turned to the critter in his hands. The beetle had been stationary, but started to crawl around on his palm. Saihara inspected further and noticed that though the beelte's wings were copper, the back and head were an emerald green. The colors shone in the afternoon sun. "This little one... they call it a Japanese Beetle," Gokuhara responded when he noticed Saihara looking. "Really?" "Yes! They only live about a year. Since this one's already an adult, it may only have a couple months left. Gonta loves all insects, but this one is one of his favorites." Gokuhara lifted up his hands and the beetle flew out of them back into the garden. Saihara thought as he watched the action. I actually don't know much about Gokuhara-kun besides his love of insects... maybe I should try to bond? "Gokuhara-kun, if you don't mind me asking, how did you come to love bugs so much?" "Huh? Why?" Gokuhara's face turned dark as his eyes lit ablaze with anger. Gokuhara suddenly looked much bigger and much more fearsome than he did even two seconds before. "Do you hate bugs? Did you intend to step on that beetle from before?" Yikes!! "No, no Gokuhara-kun!" Saihara backpedaled. He waved his hands out in front of him manically, trying to ease the situation, "I was just wondering!" "Oh, really? Then in that case Gonta would be happy to tell!" His ominous expression vanished in an instant and was replaced with a dazzling smile. Gokuhara then proceeded to tell Saihara all about his days when he was young and played in the woods by his house. He had a pack of wolves that he bonded with when he was little that he considered his family, in addition to his parents. Saihara was more than a little shocked that his classmate had somehow managed to get an entire pack of feral wolves to take care of and play with a human child, but Saihara did his best to accept the ridiculous story. Gokuhara wasn't the type to make up a story like that anyway. Gokuhara went on to talk about how most beautiful bug landed on his hand one day, and he was in love with insects ever since. He would observe them in the woods and write down his findings in journals he kept at his house. He informed Saihara he had just finished his twentieth journal and was now starting his twenty-first. It was his crown achievement. As he and Gokuhara continued to walk down the path again, Saihara continually glanced over at Gokuhara. His form was massive. Saihara could tell that he had lots of muscle. It was no mistake that Gokuhara was male, his jawline sharp and shoulders broad, despite his long and mangey hair. Saihara wondered. Back at school he had constantly been ridiculed for being weak and frail. His height wasn't impressive and neither was his strength. Saihara hated that he was mistaken for a girl. I'm a boy and people seem to accept me as such here, he thought. Still, I want to look like one too. I don't want people to mistake me for a girl anymore. I can't do anything about my body structure but... maybe building some muscle will help? ...Would Gokuhara-kun know anything about that? Saihara paused to get his wording right before speaking. "...Gokuhara-kun, would you mind if I asked you something?" "Not at all! A gentleman provides his services to all worthy favors." Saihara hesitated. He did want to change, and here was his opportunity. All he had to do was ask. Gokuhara-kun's not scary. Unless if it comes to bugs. I mean, the worst he can do is say 'no'... aside from physical assault. But I don't think he'd hate me if I asked something like this... Saihara gathered his courage before continuing. "Would you... mind showing me how you gain muscle?" "Muscle? Are you wanting to defend your wolf family too?" What? "Er, no, Gokuhara-kun. The truth is I haven't been very strong my whole life, and I've been meaning to become stronger... but I'm not sure how to do that." "Oh! If that's what you wanted Gonta would be happy to indulge in this request," Gokuhara responded. "Gonta can definitely show you how he sustains his figure!" Saihara let out a sigh of relief. That was much easier than I thought it would be. "Thank you Gokuhara-kun... would tomorrow morning before school work?" "Yes!" Gokuhara exclaimed. "Let us meet in the student athlete gym!" Saihara smiled brightly. He was finally going to start achieving his goals.

—

"Hey, Saihara!" "Huh? What is it Momota-kun?" Class had just ended in time for lunch and Saihara had intended to search for a place to sit alone. He wasn't sure where any secluded spots were, but figured he'd try anyway. He didn't want to intrude on other people's spaces... he knew that lunch circles had long been formed. There wasn't room for him anywhere today. Momota came up to his desk and grinned widely. "Do you want to join us for lunch? Akamatsu, Kiibo, Harukawa, and I often sit together. We could use an extra!" Or not. Relief and joy washed over him as he offered a small smile back. "I would love to, Momota-kun." Momota grinned more and jerked his thumb to the door. "Well c'mon then! Bring your lunch." Saihara nodded and picked up his food as he followed Momota out the door. Saihara continued to smile as he thought. It feels really nice to be included. I didn't think I'd get to enjoy this here. Momota lead him up the steps from their floor and up to the roof. It was a bright sunny day, and plenty warm enough to enjoy the sunlight without a jacket. The gentle breeze tousled his hair, the effect soothing. Well, there are some nice things about not wearing my hat, I guess. Saihara saw Akamatsu sitting alongside Harukawa and Kiibo, all with their lunches out and beginning to eat. Kiibo also had some spare tools lying around and seemed to be working on a small contraption. Momota sat beside Kiibo while Saihara settled down beside Akamatsu at the end. "Saihara-kun!" Akamatsu smiled with radiance. "I'm so happy you could join us!" Saihara smiled back. "I'm happy to join you. Thank you for inviting me, Momota-kun." "Hey, no worries!" Saihara began to take out his lunch. He noticed the rest had a variety of food in their laps. Momota was enjoying what looked like a chicken sandwhich, while Akamatsu began to eat a peanut butter and jelly, accompanied with an apple. Harukawa had taken out of thermos of steaming soup. Kiibo, on the other hand, was too focused on his device to eat anything besides a brightly colored sports drink and some chips. Is he getting enough nutrition? Saihara wondered idly. Saihara opened up his lunch and picked up his chopsticks. He was about to start eating when he heard a gasp. "Saihara-kun, your lunch is so beautiful!" "Eh?" Akamatsu was gazing at his bento box with wonder, her face completely overflowing with amazement. Saihara was confused at that. He didn't think his lunch was all that great. He had split the meal into carbs, proteins, and some fruit and vegetables, like he usually did. His lunch today consisted of rice with sesame seeds on one side, tamago rolls and ham he had cooked in the morning, along with some edamame and strawberries. Saihara didn't even have time to make an extravagant lunch since he had to get to school early to see the gardens with Gokuhara. This was just pulling together what remained in the fridge for the week. What exactly was 'amazing' about it? Momota had leaned over to see what the commotion was about. "Woah, Saihara, she's right! Your lunch looks amazing! Way better than what any of us got here!" Saihara thought he saw Harukawa scowl in his peripheral vision. He hoped she wasn't mad. "Er, you think so?" he prompted warily. "Yes!" Akamatsu nodded enthusiastically, eyes transfixed on the food. She then looked at Saihara with wonder. "Who made this? Did you buy it? You had to have! The arrangement's too perfect!" Now Saihara was blushing. This much praise to handle all at once. "Ah, no, I made this, actually." Slowly all four sets of eyes turned to his. Even Kiibo stopped working on his project to look Saihara in the eyes. Shoot. That wasn't what I wanted. This isn't weird, is it? Everyone started talking at once. "What?! That's incredible!" "Unbelievable..." "Dude! How? I couldn't even make this if I tried!" "Saihara-kun, that display is most impressive!" Saihara was beginning to feel overwhelmed. He started talking and hoped they would understand if he just explained. "N-No, you're wrong, it's just a habit I formed over the years," he fumbled over his words. "Every day? Before school even?" "Yes, I always make lunch for my father and I." Saihara had always had a skill for cooking. When he was little his mother would guide him over the steps and take his little hands in hers and show him, explaining carefully why and how each step was necessary for a delicious meal. After primary school he started making his own lunches, figuring it'd be good practice for later in life. When his mom had become hospitalized, he started making all the meals for both his father and himself. It was the least he could do for how hard his father was working. "Really? What about your mother?" Saihara winced internally. He knew he'd have to come up with a coverup eventually. "She stays at home," he forced out. The group accepted his answer and settled to continue with lunch. Saihara tried not to look as relieved as he was that the attention was no longer on him. Saihara remembered the frown he had seen Harukawa wear when talking about his lunch. He hoped that things between them didn't turn out badly, whatever the reason for her displeasure would be. He didn't want to make any enemies here while being fully able to stop it. Saihara cleared his throat quietly before asking. "Oh, by the way, Harukawa-san, what did you bring for lunch?" Harukawa turned to him with an impassive stare. She held up her thermos and stated, "Miso soup." "Oh, did you make it?" She nodded. He smiled. "It smells wonderful. I always enjoy miso soup when I have it." Harukawa's eyes softened a bit as she nodded. Oh, so she isn't mad after all, Saihara thought. "Yeah, it's about the only thing she can make though!" Harukawa began scowling again. Saihara looked to see Momota laughing as if he had told a joke. "Honestly, she's a menace in the kitchen otherwise. Hey, Kiibo, remember last year when she tried making a cake during Home Ec.?" "Please do not joke about that." Kiibo glanced at Momota with a grimace. "I still have fantom pains in my stomach from eating that cake. I hadn't realized a cake could take so awful." "Just because I mixed up the baking soda and the sugar..." "Guys, don't make fun of her!" Akamatsu chided, an uncharacteristically angry look on her face. "Maki-chan works very hard on her cooking! You shouldn't make fun of her." "Ah, right, right," Momota apologized. "Sorry Harukawa, I couldn't help it." Harukawa still didn't look pleased but let the matter drop. Saihara suddenly understood why she looked annoyed when Momota had praised his lunch. Of course she wasn't happy about it, Saihara realized. No one likes being made fun of for something they worked hard on. The rest of the lunch period progressed smoothly, cheerful banter accompanying the group. Kiibo had exclaimed in triumph when he had finished his project, which apparently was a voice recording machine with the ability to send voice files to computers through email. He insisted that it was much better than Iruma's recent invention, a claw grabber with an electric zap feature at the press of a button. Kiibo and Momota then engaged in a full-on debate over the pros and cons of each invention, each staunch in their stance of which was better. Kiibo's points included how it would be useful for writing essays, drafting songs and music (to which Akamatsu perked her ears to), and even having a voice-journal. Momota's arguments, aside from his points on self-defense, were mainly variations of how it would be "a wicked good pranking device." Saihara was more than comfortable watching them all. Is this what having friends is like? He wondered. He gazed at the four of them, talking with each other, smiles on their faces. His mouth lifted at the corners in response. This is... nice. Really nice. The warning bell rang and the five students packed up their lunches. As Saihara exited through the door down the stairwell, he was stopped by a voice. "Saihara." He turned to see Harukawa behind him on the stairs, slowly approaching him before stopping in front of him. Her eyes were certain. Saihara began. "What is it, Harukawa-san?" Harukawa hesitated before she spoke. "I have a favor to ask of you." "A favor?" "Yes." Saihara waited. Harukawa said nothing. He tried again, "Is it something I can do?" "Yes. It has to do with your cooking." Harukawa then looked down, a finger twirling her hair. Saihara recognized the nervous habit immediately. After all, he had a very similar one himself. Saihara waited as she gathered her words. He knew she must have felt vulnerable asking for such a favor. She seems to care a lot about this, he mused. Harukawa looked up at him. She squared her shoulders subtly before asking directly, "Saihara... will you be my Home Economics partner?" Home Economics class? "Your partner? Why?" She explained. "I'm sure you remember the conversation at lunch... I'm not the best of cooks. The only thing I can manage is miso soup. Anything else turns into a disaster when I touch it." Her expression turned remorseful. "My grade in the class is falling. I wouldn't normally care about that, but I do for this. Since there was only fifteen of us, I usually ended up alone. Everyone knows how awful I am when it comes to cooking. Kaede would help me sometimes but... I don't want to burden her with this anymore." Saihara noted the use of Akamatsu's first name. Come to think of it, Akamatsu called her 'Maki-chan' during lunch as well. Are they close? They seem to care a lot for each other... "I see," Saihara ventured, "So you want me to teach you how to cook?" Harukawa stiffened and glanced away. She really is nervous about this, Saihara thought. "I don't mind," he reassured. He waited for her until she continued. "Only... only if you want to," she mumbled. Saihara smiled. "Of course. I'd be more than happy to teach you. I don't have a partner for Home Ec. yet, so you're even doing me a favor." Harukawa smiled. "Thank you, Saihara." Saihara smiled back. "You're welcome." The two walked together down the stairwell until they reached the classroom.

—

The next day, Saihara was in pain. Okay, he knew that gaining muscle would be hard. He just didn't think it'd be this hard. Scratch that, this isn't just hard... "I'm telling you Gokuhara-kun, this is impossible! I can't lift 300 pounds right away!" "Saihara-kun, you'll never have muscles like Gonta if you can't lift this!" Saihara was panting after trying–and failing–several times to bench press a bar with 150-pound metal weights on either side. Saihara had thought that when they went to the school gym Gokuhara would ease him into it, starting with something more reasonable. Apparently, that was too much to ask. "Gokuhara-kun, I don't think muscles work this way... I think you have to build up to something like this. " "Really?! Gonta's always been able to lift that much!" Saihara sighed. Well, so much for trying to be in better shape. He barely had any stamina to start with and just those lifts had completely drained it all. What did Gokuhara-kun have to do in his life to think that lifting 300 pounds was easy?! "Class is going to start soon... I think we'll have to continue this another time." Saihara sighed. "Oh... Gonta apologizes he was unable to help with your request." Gokuhara replied as he helped lift the weighted bar off of his classmate. Saihara looked at Gokuhara and saw his face had a melancholy hue. He genuinely didn't mean to discourage Saihara, he had only tried helping in the only way he knew how. Saihara's heart ached. I don't want to leave with Gokuhara-kun feeling this way... Saihara stood up from the bench and squared his shoulders at him. "Gokuhara-kun." His classmate looked up at Saihara's resolute gaze. "I will work up to lifting these weights with you. Please give me time. I'll find a way to build my stamina. And when I do, do you want to... continue doing weights with me?" Gokuhara's eyes widened before he smiled brilliantly at Saihara. "Of course, Saihara-kun! Nothing would make Gonta happier!" Saihara nodded and the two packed up their belongings. Gokuhara went ahead to class early while Saihara stayed behind to take a quick shower. Even those minuscule exercises had left him sweating. When he came out Saihara noticed another person heading out of the gym as well. As their paths began to cross Saihara called out to him. "Amami-kun?" "Oh, it's Saihara-kun. Nice to see you here," Amami responded cheerfully. Saihara had not gotten used to Amami yet. Sure, Amami's bubbly demeanor was charming to many but... he sensed something else. There was a way Amami held his posture and wore his expressions that told Saihara he was no pushover. His personality was happy and inviting, as long as you didn't cross some lines. Somehow he knew that should someone cross him, Amami would go above and beyond to make his enemy's life a living hell. What confused Saihara, however, was that his aura didn't come off as menacing despite these signs. Rather, it seemed almost... protective? Saihara mentally shook himself from those thoughts as he remembered Amami was right in front of him. "I see you're just coming from a workout yourself... what did you do?" Amami smiled as he pointed to himself "Me? I did a bunch of various exercises." Various exercises? Saihara wondered. Could he have something to help me? "Amami-kun?" "Yes?" "Do you have any routines for stamina?" Amami blinked. "Stamina?" Saihara nodded. "Yes. I expressed that I wanted to be stronger to Gokuhara-kun, but when I went to lift weights with him today I was out of breath in the first few minutes." Amami chuckled. "Well of course! You're supposed to be out of breath during a workout. I can't imagine lifting weights with Gokuhara-kun would be any easier either." "Oh..." Saihara's shoulders slumped slightly. He looked down at the floor. I guess it was stupid of me to ask... now I just look dumb. Should I have not tried to get stronger after all? Saihara felt bitter at the thought. "To answer your question, by the way," Amami continued, unperturbed by Saihara's change in demeanor, "I find swimming to be an excellent way to build up stamina." Saihara lifted his head. "Swimming?" "Yes. It's a full-body workout and it's easy on the joints. It's a great place to start for beginners." Amami then smiled at him before walking past him to the door. This is it, Saihara thought while watching his classmate go by. A strong hope began to flow through him. I finally have a way to build up my stamina! "Amami-kun!" Saihara turned and raised his voice to the figure opening the door. Amami paused and looked over his shoulder at Saihara. "Thank you!" Amami grinned and waved as he closed the door behind him.

—

Mistake, mistake, mistake, Saihara chanted in his head as he completed his pushups. I should've looked up today's schedule earlier! Had Saihara checked, he would've seen that it was that special day of the week where instead of an elective, the entire class had physical fitness. Unfortunately for him, he didn't. He had been completely unaware. Which, would have been fine for Saihara had he not been still sore from lifting weights with Gokuhara in the morning. I'm really out of shape, though Saihara grudgingly. The school provided special uniforms which they were to use for the class. Though Saihara had to go to the office specifically to request them, he now had his own. The dark blue shorts and white shirt matched those around him, though the girls' shorts were cut a bit differently. Shorts length didn't make a single difference when competing against the others though. Saihara almost yelped when a very fast moving ball missed his head by a fraction and landed on their side of the court. The adrenaline rush just from dodging that ball almost froze him in place. "Oi, Saihara!" Iruma yelled across the net. "If you don't start taking this game seriously I'll cut your manhood right off!" "Ah, no thank you, Iruma-san..." Iruma humphed and turned around to get back in position. Saihara let out a breath as he returned to his spot as well. After the class had done some floor exercises and stretches, the instructor told them that today was volleyball day, and they were to split into teams of four, with two nets to challenge the teams. They counted off and were sorted by number. On his side of the court Saihara stood with Hoshi, Shirogane, and Ouma. Their opponents were Chabashira, Momota, Iruma, and Toujou. Saihara was suspicious of the display Ouma made before being counted off. He had been hanging around Amami until he abruptly put himself between Chabashira and Yumeno before it got to them, effectively separating the two to different sides of the court. Ouma had only laughed when Chabashira accused him of planning something. "Don't worry, Saihara!" Momota had patted him across the shoulder. "I know you'll do great even if we're opponents!" ... So he said but... Saihara was convinced the entire count off was a conspiracy. Despite having known his classmates for less than a week, somehow he was certain that his opposing team was made up of the most competitive members of the class. Iruma took no quarter with her fierce blows and Momota's eyes were blazing with determination. Chabashira had been competitive from the start, but somehow having Ouma on the other side made it worse. He was sure that the teasing wasn't helping. "Ah Iruma-chan, we're not trying to break bones here! Your throws might kill somebody," Ouma sang cheerfully. "Oh and Chabashira-chan, you know this isn't Aikido so be sure not to punch the ball, okay? You have to strike it!" Tenko's teeth visibly grinded in anger. Saihara knew that a little friendly competition never hurt, but it seemed as if the term "friendly" had stopped being applicable as soon as Ouma opened his mouth. Honestly, Saihara thought, What is he trying to accomplish with this? "Are you worried, Saihara-chan?" Saihara turned to see Ouma only a few steps away from him, a smile spread confidently across his face. The look puzzled Saihara. Ouma almost looked like a cat about to play with it's favorite mouse. "No, it's just a game after all," Saihara replied. "Really? I know I'd be worried if I was by the net right by an angry-looking Chabashira-chan!" Saihara sighed. "So you are doing it on purpose..." "Hmm?" Ouma questioned innocently, lifting his arms above his head. "What do you mean?" Saihara looked him directly in the eyes. "You're purposely riling her up by teasing her and insulting her. Really, Ouma-kun, what's your goal? Do you want a team of angry opponents?" Ouma simply stared at him. Saihara almost groaned in exasperation. How many times is he gonna do this? Does he even plan on answering any of the questions I ask? "All right, I'm going to serve," called Hoshi from the back. Saihara turned from Ouma and refocused on the game. As long as he kept all of his limbs he'd consider it a win... Hoshi spiked the ball up and served, the ball flying to the other side of the net. Toujou caught it with dexterity and precision, passing it to Iruma. Iruma hit it over to Momota, who struck it over the net. Shirogane dived for the ball and saved it last minute, and Saihara swiftly set it over the net. Saihara saw Chabashira right in front of him across the net, and knew she was going to try to spike it back. He had to be ready. He saw the ball, slowly rising in the air. It hit its peak height and- "Chabashira-chan, be sure not to hit like a girl!" Oh no. Saihara paled as he saw Chabashira's eyes practically explode with fury. She jumped. A raised hand and a sound like "thwack" were the only warnings he received before his vision blacked out completely.

—

Saihara woke up slowly. He was somewhere warm and soft. His head was pounding, why was his head pounding? He frowned a bit before slowly blinking away the sleep. He opened his eyes to find a figure leaning above him, a face close to his, and pair of eyes staring right back into his own. Ouma was staring right at him. Saihara stared back. Were Ouma's eyes always this big? He thought, his brain was still in a fog of drowsiness. In this light, they almost look- "Good morning~! You're finally awake!" His voice did the trick. Saihara gasped, suddenly very aware of how close they were and how Ouma's hands were on either side of his head. Saihara's shoulders stiffened reflexively as he scrambled his mind for an explanation. Nothing came up. "O-Ouma-kun! W-what-" "Well, technically it's 'good afternoon,' since it's past lunch and all." Ouma looked completely unfazed by their positions, and didn't seem the slightest bit affected by their proximity. Saihara tried to calm his heart down. There's no reason to freak out, he reasoned as his mind spun. There's probably a very logical explanation for this. He tried asking again, "Ouma-kun, what-what happened? Where is this?" "You're in the nurse's office, silly! You hit your head pretty hard in that volleyball game." "V-volleyball...?" Oh, that's right. I was in P.E. class. Saihara remembered splitting off into teams, Ouma aggravating Chabashira intentionally. Then... nothing. "Yep!" Ouma continued. "We had started another match, but Chabashira-chan was so angry she hit the ball right on your forehead! There's an ugly bruise there now," Ouma giggled. Saihara frowned and brought his hand up to his forehead. Sure enough, he felt pain when he found the bruise. But the back of my head is what's hurting... "Wait, Chabashira-san hit the ball so hard it knocked me out?" He asked incredulously. Even for someone as strong as her that seemed incredibly unlikely. "What? Don't be dumb, Saihara-chan," Ouma pouted. "The ball made you fall, and you hit your head on the floor," he patronized. He exhaled dramatically, "Honestly, Saihara-chan, I thought you were smart." Oh. That makes a lot more sense. My head hit the floor and that's why it's hurting in the back instead of the front... Saihara motioned to sit up and Ouma let him, though still close to his side. Saihara noticed he had brought a chair to sit beside the cot. A chair? Was he waiting for me to wake up this whole time? Saihara rubbed his forehead, pain still present. "How did I get in the nurse's office?" "Oh, Harukawa-chan carried you up here." "Harukawa-san did...?" "Yup! She may not seem like it, but she has a looooot of muscle!" Saihara felt a small rush of gratitude. So they really did bond at lunch. He'd have to thank her later. "By the way Ouma-kun... were you waiting for me, by any chance?" "Hmm? Why would you think that, Saihara-chan?" Ouma grinned, lips stretched as if hiding a juicy secret. Saihara reasoned, "Well, you were here when I woke up, and your chair is by the bed... it's a logical conclusion." Ouma grinned. "Yep, I did! Since I was responsible for knocking you unconscious after all!" Saihara paused. "What... do you mean?" "The game was so boring up until that point," Ouma said. "I didn't even want to play with everyone. So I thought I'd add a bit of fun by messing with the other team." Ouma started talking more animatedly, "But then you got knocked out, so I offered to watch over you! After all, it was the least I could do since I annoyed Chabashira-chan so much." Saihara rubbed his temples in defeat. "So you just used me as an excuse to get out of P.E..." he muttered. "What? How cruel, Saihara-chan! Is your opinion of me that low?" Ouma's face changed until it bore a pretty convincing look of a child about to burst into tears. Saihara wasn't about to be fooled. He spoke as met Ouma's eyes square on, "Well, how else would you have me take it?" He had openly stated he had annoyed Chabashira and the others on purpose. What else was he capable of? Ouma's sorrow vanished in a blink, leaving a pondering look on his face, "Hmm... I don't know," He said. Suddenly his mouth curled at the edges and his eyes narrowed in mirth. He leaned closer, face inches from Saihara's before softly admitting, "Maybe I just wanted to see more of Saihara-chan's beautiful sleeping face." Saihara froze. He stared at Ouma with incredulous eyes. He can't be serious, can he? Ouma suddenly leaned away. "Juuuuust kidding!" Saihara broke eye contact and looked away, resignation filling his bones. Saihara realized that as long as he hung around Ouma he'd have to put up with his antics. I can't take anything this guy says seriously. And he seems rather happy watching me squirm... Saihara turned his legs to get off of the bed. He noticed that he was still in his P.E. uniform. After changing into the school uniform placed by the cot on the side table, Saihara thanked the nurse and walked out of the office with Ouma. He noticed the hallways were quiet. Usually he'd expect more people to be about. Wasn't P.E. still in session? As Saihara went to his desk and gathered his books to take home, he noted that even his classmate's belongings were gone. There really is no one here. Is still fourth period? "Hey, Ouma-kun, I hit my head during fourth period, right?" he asked tentatively. "Yep, that's when P.E. is!" he responded. "Thank goodness you didn't have a nosebleed, or we would've had to take you to the hospital to check for a concussion," Ouma stated cheerily. Saihara paused. There was something about his words that stuck out to him. Was he forgetting something? Hospital... Hospital... hospital... .......Hospital! Panic seized Saihara's heart as he gasped in realization. What if the reason no one was around was- He frantically turned to Ouma. "Ouma-kun! What time is it?!" Ouma looked at him curiously. "The time? Why?" "Please, it's important!" "Hmm okay then." Ouma pulled out his phone. "It's 3:25." Saihara felt dread pool his stomach faster than a dam breaking. It wasn't just past fourth period, the whole school day had ended. I need to go now! "Eh? Saihara-chan, where are you going?" Ouma called out when suddenly faced with Saihara frantically stuffing the rest of his books in his bag and speed-walking out of the classroom. Ouma had to jog lightly to keep up. Saihara continued to hurry out of the building as quickly as he could, stress quickly taking over. Soon they reached the front gates of the school and Saihara looked back to Ouma, still walking forwards. His words came out jumbled and frenzied. "Thank you so much for looking after me, Ouma-kun, I really have to go I hope you understand, I'm not mad at all but I really have to go. I'll see you tomorrow!" With that, Saihara fled the scene all but running, scurrying off down the street and around corners until Ouma could see him no more.

—

Ouma stared in mild shock at the street had just seen his classmate run down. He had expected Saihara to realize school was over, but the rush? Now that was unexpected. Seeing Saihara, timid and shy but resolute in his ideas, suddenly rushing out of the school as if his life depended on it had thrown Ouma for a loop. It was such a contrast from what he had observed of him before that he could only stand by the gates, surprised. Then he let out a chuckle as he brought his hand to his mouth. Ouma hummed as he walked away from the school, a newfound joy overtaking his senses. In truth, Ouma didn't feel the least bit remorseful for angering Chabashira or any of the rest. He only thought they would be a little less dull if they took the game seriously. After all, what's the point of a game if there's not some intent to win? The rest didn't even notice. But Saihara-chan! Ouma thought with growing enthusiasm. He saw right through me! No one had ever done that really. Not only had he noticed the game Ouma was playing, but he also called him out on it–how thrilling! So when Saihara had been knocked out, he'd immediately offered to watch over him. He didn't want to participate in P.E. anymore, and maybe Saihara would surprise him more when he woke up. Some of his classmates even seemed grateful to get rid of him for a while. That was the plan, but really Ouma had no idea Saihara would actually sleep through the rest of school. It's not like Ouma cared enough to attend class instead, so he sat there watching the rise and fall of Saihara's chest. Definitely not his face. His gorgeous, elegant face... Okay, so maybe he had stared a little bit. How could he not? It's not like anything else in the room was as interesting. Ouma admired how smooth his skin was, how soft his hair looked, the newfound discovery of how long his lashes were. Others might have referred to them as feminine qualities, but to Ouma they just made him more attractive. He really is handsome... He had been leaning over him to get a better look when Saihara started stirring. How privileged Ouma had felt to see his eyes slowly blink open. Saihara's soft-looking hair framed his face and lay across the pillow in a lovely manner. His long lashes decorated his gray eyes as he slowly opened up his eyes, still half-lidded from sleep. Ouma swore he absolutely did not feel something in his chest flip. Of course, even when Saihara became flustered once he realized the situation, he still looked quite breathtaking. Add the sudden puzzle of Saihara's rush to leave, and Ouma had much to think about. "Really, Saihara-chan," he spoke aloud to the empty street, glee filling his voice, "You really are a mystery!" He was getting quite attached, indeed.

Notes!

I was just casually writing Gokuhara and then translations were like 'sike... he speaks in the third person.' Gonta u slay me. My grammar instincts were going like crazy. And then apparently everyone refers to him by his first name?? OTL Just... just take this.....

Notes on the Chapter! - Saihara's eyes playing tricks on him: Based on personal experience. I attended my grandfather's funeral and kept thinking I'd see his chest moving up and down, even though I know it didn't. Tried to incorporate that into the story. - Reading corner: Also based on personal experience from when I was young. Apparently when I was done playing with other kids I would go and sit by myself and read for an hour XD - Gonta's wolf family: I heard in canon he was raised by wolves? Wasn't quite sure how to incorporate that into this non-despair universe so went down the "grew up with wolves and family" path. ...Why do you continue to make my life difficult Gonta. - 300 pounds: Okay straight up I'm American and I genuinely hit a stump when trying to use SI units? What do you people call weights in other countries? ... Kilos? Anyway I suffered and I kept trying to use the heathen measurements I'm used to. I'm sorry, it's just gonna have to be that way. If I do use measurements from now on I'll put the equivalents in the chapter notes at the end. As an estimate for those who aren't used to pounds, 300 lbs is roughly 136 kg. - Gonta's strength: Yes, in canon apparently he lifts a manhole with his FINGERS. Those are like 250 lbs (113 kg)... how. - Swimming: Based on personal experience! I do swimming and it helps because my body hates running :'). - Saihara's lunch: He makes bento! I'm unfamiliar with how to make bento boxes so I used this as a reference: http://www.justonecookbook.com/how-to-make-bento/ - Kaede and Maki's relationship: Okay, true confessions, I was gunning REALLY HARD for that ship to be a thing. And then canon just... smashed it. Not sure yet if I want them to be friends or girlfriends yet... just let me have them as close friends at least give me that much. _(:3」∠)_ - Home Economics Class: I think this is a thing in Japan? They have classes about how to cook, sew, do adult things, etc. I really liked the idea and decided to use it! :D

And that’s it for now kiddos! Hope to see you soon! (●˙꒳˙●)/

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daleisgreat · 5 years

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Dale’s Top 36 Gaming Experiences of 2018

Greetings dear readers and welcome to my annual top gaming experiences/moments/favorite games I played in 2018 that may or may not have released in 2018 round-up!!! Consider this my personal greatest hits compilation of my year in videogames that was 2018! Buckle up buck-a-roos because I am going to take you on a several thousand word journey as I count you down my handpicked top 33 gaming ‘experiences’ of the year! This is not going to be any other ordinary quick scroll through of listed top games of the year because almost anything I did gaming related qualifies for a ‘experience’ in 2018. That experience could be my overall time I invested into a certain game or series of games I decided to lump into one list item, or it could be a certain other piece of gaming memorabilia, news item that really struck me or a memorable gaming session with friends and family that makes it perfectly eligible for the list! So if you have not by now then use your favorite bookmark app (I recommend Pocket) or ‘control + d’ to manually bookmark this page to revisit this feast of words because it is going to take some time to consume! For optimal experience I highly recommend a big cup of coffee and blaring one of those 10-hour YouTube videos of ambient rain because that is exactly what I did to craft this beast! Speaking of YouTube videos I linked to a whole boatload of them throughout the rankings from trailers for most games I discuss and moments that really popped for me if you so desire to click them for a reference to the corresponding footage. If you managed to finish this monster and dare to seek out my similar takes on previous years of gaming experiences then I triple-dog-dare you to check out my write-ups for my best of 2017 and best of 2016 gaming spectaculars. Enough with this intro, to the list we go! ---Recommended – This is Bonkers Long So Please Read This in the Suggested Installments--- Part 1 - Rankings 36 through 31 Part 2 - Rankings 30 through 24 Part 3 - Rankings 23 through 18 Part 4 - Rankings 17 through 14 Part 5 - Rankings 13 through 10 Part 6 - Rankings 9 through 4 Part 7 - Rankings 3 through 1 PART 1 - RANKINGS 36 THROUGH 31 36) Telltale & Prima RIP I hate to kickoff this list with a downer, but that is why this is at the bottom of the list. The saga of Telltale announcing its closing in 2018 was quite the affair with all the misguided reactionary hoopla. It initially leaned towards fan outcry of Telltale now being unable to finish the final season of its acclaimed Walking Dead line of episodic games it was in the middle of releasing getting more attention over the developers who lost their jobs and benefit plans. Things were getting heated in the wrong ways real quick, but there was a modicum of redemption with fellow videogame developers reaching out and picking up many of the laid off and publisher Skybound Studios picking up the rights for the remaining episodes of the final season of The Walking Dead and following up that announcement with good news of Skybound being able to re-hire most of the original developers who did not already land jobs elsewhere.

I feel I wronged Telltale this year by having 2018 be the first year in several years where I did not complete a season of a Telltale game. Tales of the Borderlands and both seasons of Batman are in my massive ‘want to play’ stack, and now with The Walking Dead being on its way to being concluded I now feel obligated to pick up where I left off after finishing season two a few years ago. Prima closing up surprisingly resonated with me. They have been the constant major publisher of videogame strategy guides for what seems like an eternity. Part of me is surprised Prima hung around this long with how easy it is to reference GameFAQs and other online guides, wikis and YouTube playthroughs for free in an instant. I prefer to go that route too, but I would occasionally pick up a Prima guide and would prefer their more detailed layouts and maps when playing Fallout 3 and Skyrim than compared to what an average text GameFAQs guide can offer. I will also give a shoutout to their supplementary NES & SNES Now You’re Playing Power/Super Power guides/nostalgia books that launched alongside the NES & SNES Classic. Both feature lots of vintage scans from Nintendo Power alongside new interviews with developers, pro speedrunners and creators of fan art, music and website communities. When I heard of their closure I went out and ordered Prima guides for other Bethesda games like Fallout 4 and New Vegas. When I went to file them away I hung my head in shame to see I already procured the Fallout 4 guide awhile back, so now I have two copies of that one. Backup copy! There will still be other specialty strategy guide publishers (major props to FanGamer’s guides!), but none with the presence or outreach of Prima established. 35) Non Virtual Boy VR Last year in the round-up I stated how I have too many reservations about getting on board with the VR craze that has swept up a segment of the gaming world and that I will stick with my Virtual Boy for my VR needs. My Extra Life friends Chris and Lyzz have a Playstation VR headset and had me try it out at their place in 2018 and after trying out a couple games in PSVR…..I was impressed, but still not sold on it overall. I played one or two of the mini-games on the PSVR Worlds mini-game collection that came with the peripheral. I then played about a half hour of London Heist. That experience was a memorable one as I got to admit it was cool looking around the gangster hideouts while being tied up and taking in the unique 360 camera of my surroundings that is only possible in a VR experience. The gameplay was on the money too in some shooting gallery segments and eventually a car chase portion that was the highlight of my time with London Heist.

I was relieved I did not suffer from any of the motion sickness I heard wide varieties of minor and severe reports of from VR players. Then again I only played PSVR for only an hour. I have kept up with the games hitting PSVR since its launch and in its first couple years it has built a library of several games that appear to hold their own as premiere VG single player experiences with bonafide hits such as Moss, Astrobot and Farpoint. After some legit hands-on time with PSVR I will maintain my reservations on VR in general. The price entry point is way too high and I would rather spend the money needed for starting off a proper PSVR experience in upgrading my PC instead. It requires a lot of cumbersome setup, it is a safety hazard by completely blocking off your surroundings and finally after playing for a mere hour my face felt like it was sat on for many more hours after removing the headset. I may try out VR down the line at friend’s places or wherever I run into it at and will likely enjoy my time with it, but as far as owning VR goes I will continue to be happy with my Virtual Boy and reliving the complete Virtual Boy experience in 2019 with Jeremy Parish’s Vitual Boy Works line of videos. 34) Hadoken 2018

If you do not have it already on last-gen systems, I still would recommend Ultra Street Fighter IV as it collects nearly all the DLC characters and costumes and goes on sale digitally frequently. It was a hit revisiting with Chris, but the surprise SF hit among us online was Street Fighter 30th Anniversary Collection. Aside from collecting 12 of the earliest SF games, it made four of them online and Capcom had a slick online lobby system to make it quick and seamless to jump from playing one version of SF to another. Chris and I got lots of fights in throughout the year and I also did about 20 fights in online ranked lobbies against random opponents in hopes of getting just one win to get a trophy. That proved to be a brutal endeavor as my assumptions of my meek hadoken skills hoping to get lucky once were foolish as I lost every time (thought a couple of times I won once out of three…yay?). The worst was when higher skilled opponents would sit there and wait for me to come at them before schooling me with counter attacks. That happened even worse in Mortal Kombat X online against randoms, but as they say, practice makes perfect. 33)Mass Effect Andromeda Novels I have seen nobody talking about these…probably because of how lackluster Mass Effect Andromeda was received. I was a huge fan of all four novels published concurrently alongside the original Mass Effect Trilogy and they helped fleshed out the story between games and gave a ton of back story to characters I was thrilled to see finally appear in the third game. I had no idea publisher Titan Books were releasing novels set in the Andromeda universe until about a year after the first one hit. Just a few months ago they released the third of the planned four books set in the Andromeda timeline.

I finished the first two books and enjoyed both of them. I gave more thorough reviews on my GoodReads account and will link to them here. For the quick breakdown though Nexus Uprising deals with a crisis of the Nexus mothership arriving at Andromeda attacked by a mysterious ‘scourge’ and the hysteria that results with its limited crew in charge of a ship barely hanging onto survival. Nexus Uprising leads right into the start of the Andromeda game. Initiation has a new Andromeda recruit fresh off her seven years of Asari training traveling for one last mission before journeying to Andromeda where the new recruit encounters a hostile VI/AI in a facility she must now survive and rescue as many survivors along with her. The latest book, Annihilation, I am only halfway through and I regret to report that I am just not feeling this one. Annihilation explains why about a third of the original Mass Effect races are not in the Andromeda game as it goes into detail why they all took a separate ship there that wound up having a disastrous journey. I enjoyed the peripheral races in the original games in nice little spurts, but having a book focusing entirely on the volus, elcor, drell and a couple other races so far has been a slog to get through. I will keep my fingers crossed it picks up in the second half. 32) HDMI Cables for Retro Consoles The past couple of years have seen an emerging trend of either having deluxe HDMI conversion kits for older systems to display at their proper resolutions on newer TVs or having third parties re-release older systems like the NES and SNES with new HD capabilities. Those are great options to have if you want a pristine picture on your HDTV for retro gaming goodness, but they cost a premium and 2018 saw manufacturer Pound release their HDMI cables for SNES, Dreamcast, Xbox and PS2 all for around $30 each. I picked up the Dreamcast and PS2 cables, but have only had time to test out the DC cables so far. I dug out the Dreamcast and tested out several games with regular cables and then the Pound cables and noticed a definite improvement in the graphics! They no longer have that washed out ‘muddiness’ look when I would ordinarily run a SD system on a HDTV with composite/RCA cables. There was a minor caveat where I noticed a minor background graphical effect in menus and only when I took the time to squint and stare during gameplay, but other than that this was a much affordable alternative. I found out about these from YouTuber, MetalJesus and you can see his coverage of it by clicking here with plenty of before and after comparisons to see if they may be what you are looking for. 31) Father’s Day Gaming I have nostalgic memories of the many long gaming sessions I had with my dad and siblings while spending weekend visitations with him. We went all the way back to the original Pong and Atari 2600 in my childhood years through the NES, SNES and finally N64 during my high school years. While I have wonderful moments of many games with the family in each era the N64 years were the ones I cherished the most because of the ease of four player multiplayer with its four controller ports which was perfect for my dad, my brother Joe and either my sister Ann or another friend that would be over to helm the fourth player spot. Almost a couple hours of every visitation during that time we played countless hours of competitive N64 multiplayer.

That was many years ago though since we regularly played, and while thinking of ideas for what to do for Father’s Day this past year instead of going out for dinner and catching a movie like we would usually do I threw out the idea of staying in and having pizza and doing an N64 gaming day. I was delighted to hear my dad and brother were both up for it and thank goodness the games still held up and were just as much fun to play as they were around 20 years ago. My dad loved New Tetris and was a total pro and would be in a trance when he used to play it all the time so I was mighty curious to see how well he remembered it all these years later. We were all a little rusty, but we all got back into the rhythm of things after a few minutes and it was like we did not miss a beat. I am always disheartened to hear New Tetris get overlooked when I was hearing multiple discussions of past great Tetris games when Tetris Effect took the gaming community by storm in 2018. New Tetris was the first 3-4 player console Tetris game and also the first home console game to debut the incredibly handy ‘hold piece’ which is why New Tetris ranked right up there with Tengen Tetris, OG GameBoy Tetris and Tetris DS for my favorite versions of the legendary puzzle game. We also played a hefty amount of Mario Kart 64 and GoldenEye 007. I have heard the countless debates over the years, and I will forever contest the N64 Mario Kart as the pinnacle of the series. I have also heard the many people proclaim that GoldenEye is an outdated mess all these years later. Every two or three years I bust out GoldenEye and the same thing happened here as before, after a few minutes of adjusting to the graphics and controls the game had its hooks in us again and we were having intense rounds of deathmatch with muscle memories suddenly kicking in of our favorite map and weapon presets. The three of us went on to have many rounds of fun blowing the crap out of each other! I have been watching Giant Bomb’s line of recent Die Another Friday videos where they try and run through the campaign in Perfect Agent difficulty. Instead of the expected jokes about how dated the graphics were I was relieved to see that most of the GB crew eventually were legit surprised at how fun GoldenEye still is. ---YouTube Break From This Already Way Too Long List--- A semi-decent laugh should be had at this point for a breather. Behold, the greatest Family Feud moment of all time! Now witness Always Sunny’s blatant ripoff tribute to that legendary game show when the cast competes on the exact same style of show they call Family Fight! PART 2 - RANKINGS 30 THROUGH 24 30) Videogames in Theatrical Form Longtime followers of my work may recall my podcasting days where my co-hosts and I would go out of our way to track down and cover almost every major and obscure videogame licensed film that hit theaters or direct-to-video. Minus a few exceptions, they were usually painful experiences. Even though my podcasting days are behind me I still like to keep up the tradition of catching any new film that hits the theater or video that is based on or around videogames. 2018 I managed to catch four new films that fit the criteria. The new Tomb Raider featuring Alicia Vikander as the one and only Lara Croft was solid, but nothing spectacular. It had a handful of memorable stunts and captured a few of the moments I recall from the acclaimed self-titled reboot game in 2013 so on the videogame film curve I would categorize that as a ‘win.’ Rampage featuring The Rock totally surprised me how they were able to get a fun movie out of a straightforward arcade smash-em-up from the 80s. Within a half hour I was feeling for the monsters and Rock’s connection for them was surprisingly powerful. Really good stuff that you should not dismiss!

Looking back on Ready Player One several months after its release I can safely recommend it. I loved the book when I read it shortly after its release several years ago and I was somewhat conflicted coming out of the film. This is because of how far it strayed from the book yet essentially maintained a similar over-arching plot on how a world full of gamers playing the same VR game are tracking down the creator’s hidden ‘easter egg’ in order to inherit his riches and become his heir. Avid game player I am I could not help but keep my eyes peeled for as many as ‘blink-and-you-will-miss-it’ cameos from the beloved mascots of videogames and pop culture from over the years. After hearing how the author wrote the screenplay and gave his seal of approval for the changes I eventually was won over by them especially since the changes were entertaining and since the film came out only four or five years after the book it could have been a slog to see the movie play out 100% the same. To close off 2018 a few weeks ago I took two of my many nieces and nephews to see Wreck-It Ralph 2: Ralph Breaks the Internet. That was a unique experience because my middle-school aged niece and nephew were ecstatic to point out a couple of YouTubers they follow that have cameos in the film. The sequel had a similar structure to the first where the first 20-ish minutes circle around Ralph and Vanellope loving life in their arcade they reside and visiting other arcade classics of gaming lore. I love how Tapper got a lot of love in the film with Ralph and Vanellope making that game setting their late-night watering hole of choice! Eventually though their arcade gets hooked up to WiFi and it was fun seeing Ralph and Vanellope take a journey in Disney’s CG version of the Internet with lots of real-life companies like Google, Amazon, etc. having their own fun representations in the film. This sequel was a big hit with me and once I got past the welcomed videogame references in the first 20 minutes I enjoyed Wreck-It Ralph 2’s overall plot exponentially more than the first film. 29) Yippee-Kay-Yay-Mutha….. For readers of this blog who may or may not also keep up with my film reviews here, I recently reviewed Die Hard in honor of it being a Christmas film classic (yes, I am one of those people). It should go without saying that Die Hard is one the all-time greatest action films, and after watching it again a few weeks ago I recalled how there were a few PSone and GameCube games I had vague memories of fairly decent receptions at the time and after discovering how low they were priced on eBay I decided to take a chance on them. I loved the arcade game, but do not own a Saturn so I did not hunt down that version, but got the two PSone Die Hard Trilogy games and Die Hard: Vendetta on GameCube. I have not had a chance to play them yet, but I have since watched a few entertaining Game Informer Replay videos on them revisiting these ‘gems’ to varying degrees of quality all these years later that will suffice for now until I get around to them. Here are a few links so you can check them out and do the same! 28) ….And Raging Justice….For All

I referenced in these round-ups before how every few years my friend Matt and I would marathon several random beat-em-up classics usually consisting of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and X-Men variety. The last time we did that was around 2015, and the current gen systems have been flooded with a quality amount of re-releases of classics and obscure releases and all-new installments in the genre that we have been neglecting for far too long. Just a couple weeks ago Matt and I finally got around to playing through one of them on the PS4 called Raging Justice. It had a similar look and feel to Final Fight, but with a slightly pastel-esque touch to the graphics that made the late ‘80s punk ooze right out of the game! The story had all kinds of goofy street punk gang warfare that we both ate up and we were really gelling in our playthrough and we were surprisingly not eating up that many lives. As a matter of fact we only went through one continue between both of us! After plowing through it within two hours we made a list of other similar new beat-em-ups that hit PS4/XB1 over the years so hopefully we will do better at sticking with this genre in 2019. 27) Now You’re Playing With a Power……ed Up NES/SNES Classic

If you do not want to go down the route listed above by hunting down HDMI cables for a system you do not own or a pricey HD-capable 3rd party version of a NES/SNES than there are a couple of grey-area alternatives. I talked about the RetroPie in last year’s round-up, so this year I want to focus on what people are calling ‘modding’ your NES/SNES Classic. I am not going to give you a step-by-step breakdown, but a quick Google/YouTube search will point you in the right direction. Once it is done you can add up to as many games that will fit in the Classic’s internal memory. If you stick with just NES games you can fit a majority of the NES’s library on the internal memory, SNES game sizes are noticeably bigger and if only going that route with ROMs you can fit roughly 200 of them on there…..that is if you in good faith own the original copies. There is a nice benefit to the NES/SNES Classic compared to the RetroPie and that is a friendlier user interface complete with upbeat background music and the ability to upload your own box art which ostensibly delivers the nostalgic sensation of browsing the shelves at a videogame rental store and thus is more appealing than scrolling through a large text box of games on a RetroPie. Since the NES/SNES Classic is HDMI it provides an excellent HD picture for these classic 8 and 16-bit games. This resulted in busting out both the NES & SNES Classic several times throughout 2018 for some free spirited gaming nights. 26) Tabletop/Pen and Paper Madness

I referenced last year how I started to get into semi-routinely board game nights with my friends Derek, Ryan and Brooke and we managed to keep the board game nights churning throughout 2018. Derek & Brooke have amassed a hearty collection of board games and we were able to rotate a fair amount of games from last year and new ones to try out this year. One of the board games we revisited often was Betrayal at House on Haunted Hill, and they release a spin-off called Betrayal at Baldur’s Gate we were all eager to try throughout the year. We finally busted it out on a day where my brother was able to join us and it was a great medieval themed take on the original game that did not disappoint. Another new board game we tried out was Elder Signs. Thank goodness Derek, Ryan and Brooke are awesome tutors because the game had an elaborate setup with many pieces and by about halfway through our session I was familiar enough with the play style that yielded a fantastic end to that round when all of us were able to mount an insurmountable comeback that resulted in an unlikely, thrilling win for us all! Shifting from tabletop gaming to pen and paper gaming, I have always been a fan of the SNES/GEN versions of Shadowrun. I always knew a group of friends that have been roleplaying the pen and paper RPG it is based on for quite a few years now and they reached out before to get me to play, but with my gonzo work/sleep schedule I knew it would be impossible to routinely play with them every week. I still had that itch to want to at least give it a honest try all these years later so I reached out to them and asked if I was able to commit to playing at least once a month with them and if they would they find a way to squeeze me in? Thank goodness they found a way to create random characters and place me into their campaign for the three times I made it out there to play with them. Mike is an awesome storyteller and ran a fun campaign, and I will also give props to Justine, Ron & Robb for being very welcoming and tolerant of my noob-ness and by being quite gracious sharing their infinite Shadowrun wisdom unto me. Unfortunately I fell out of the routine of playing with them after a few times, but I am glad to finally tried it out after all these years and would be down to make random cameos in their future sessions. 25) Kicking that Early Access Bug

I am going to cheat a smidge on this one because in December of 2017 through 2018 several games I invested lots of time into and/or have been majorly anticipating finally left Steam Early Access (SEA) and got official releases. Some went onto have official releases on console of well. Gang Beasts has always been silly goofy wrestling/brawling fun with creatures made of a silly puddy-esque substance and it was fascinating watching that game evolve over the several years Gang Beasts was in SEA until its official December 2017 release. I had fun times with friends in that game, and especially witnessing countless Giant Bomb sessions of its madness. FirePro World was another wrestling game that came out of SEA in December of 2017, but it was only in SEA for several months…not years. I have loved previous FirePro games for their faithful representation of a wrestling match and endless customization options, and was thrilled to see it get a physical PS4 release which wound up being the first physical wrestling game I picked up since…..wow…WWE 2K14. Road Redemption was another game that spent a few years in SEA and I was stoked that it finally got an official release in 2018, with later digital versions that hit PS4 and XB1 in the following months. I raved about it before in previous year-end round-ups, and it is long overdue to finally have a motorcycle combat racer that is finally worthy of being deemed a successor to the heralded Road Rash series. There is a lot more to Road Redemption than being a Road Rash clone, so stick with it as its bizarre rogue-lite nature of its career mode and bonkers weather and weaponry will unleash mayhem you likely did not anticipate coming in. Distance is another driving game that was in SEA for far too long, but after four years Distance emerged a fleshed out release. It is a driving game like nothing else, and the best way I can sum it up is a ‘trippy neon platforming Trials-esque’ driving experience. Its standout feature is a platforming ‘adventure’ mode which was rebuilt for the official release and went on to add so much other tracks and customization features since I last played Distance in SEA that I hope my meek PC can still handle it when I eventually revisit it!

Not done yet because two more driving games trapped for years in SEA also fully released in 2018. Jalopy is another adventure-esque driving game where you take your uncle on a trek across Eastern Europe in the family’s run-down lemon of a vehicle that needs constant attention and repairs and not to mention other tomfoolery the duo stumbles into amidst their travels. I have had my eye on Jalopy for awhile and was relieved to hear when its long SEA cycle also concluded. Finally, Bugbear’s project formerly known as Next Car Game released in 2018 as Wreckfest. It is the spiritual successor to Bugbear’s FlatOut line of demolition derby racing games that I have so many fond memories of. Wreckfest looks and feels like a current-gen FlatOut and I was glad to see it retain its excellent physics engine the series was known for. I was bummed to see the console release get a delay into the second half of 2019, but for those with capable PCs, Wreckfest is fully out now to consume in all its destructive glory! I do have two quick honorable mentions for this category. Super Indie Karts is an adorable Mario Kart-clone featuring mascots from many hit indie games as drivers that has also been in SEA forever. The developer keeps regularly adding content though and it just released a fresh batch of tracks and drivers (featuring the not-so-indie ToeJam & Earl) to the build a few days ago. I have nothing but super-fun memories of my time with Super Indie Karts so I hope it gets its long-awaited official release in 2019! Finally, while Shaq-Fu 2: A Legend Reborn never was officially in SEA when Shaq accidentally leaked it out in an offhanded interview four years ago shortly before its Kickstarter campaign premiere, it feels like it never left there once the game released to worst game of the year-caliber reception. I own two copies of the 1994 original Shaq-Fu, so I felt obligated to purchase the sequel when I recently stumbled upon it in the clearance bins for $6 just a few months after its release. 24) Good ‘ol Fashioned Videogame Couch Multiplayer

I will also give a quick mention to the videogame nights I was glad to be a part of with Derek, Brooke and Ryan! While 2018 saw us hit up more board game nights we managed to sneak in a few couch videogame multiplayer nights of some old favorites like Sony’s take on the JackBox Party Pack that is called That’s You where the four of us chuckled away the night at its irreverent trivia and doodling nonsense on each other’s faces. We also mixed in a couple other games into the rotation throughout the year. I heard great things about Towerfall before, but finally playing it was a rush and a half with its fast intense bouts of bow-and-arrow deathmatches with sudden death animations that left us in stitches! Derek introduced us to the bonkers four player game called Ultimate Chicken Horse where users play several quick rounds trying to reach a goal but insert random objects of torture between each round that makes getting to the goal near impossible by the end of the game. It was a big hit with our group. Finally it will behoove me to include the crazy night we had with the 360 game, Cloudberry Kingdom. It is an absurd runner game filled with all kinds of deathtraps just waiting to obliterate our adorable avatars. Cloudberry Kingdom has literally hundreds of levels, and as expected each one got procedurally more nuts but was still a blast to attempt to complete! After a couple hours of the madness and many attempts on one particularly troublesome stage we all had this priceless defeated look on our faces after we finally finished it and we all knew in that instant that we were DONE with it for the night! What a fantastic runner I hope we get to revisit again one day! ---YouTube Break #2--- Time for another breather! You do not have to be a fan of wrestling to enjoy these! ‘Bawdy Bawdy, We Like to Party’ legendary ECW tag team Public Enemy elucidates to rookie Mikey Whipwreck how championship wrestlers train in the mid-1990s. While we are here reminiscing about the Public Enemy, click here for their EPIC WCW theme song that was unavoidably catchy to sing-a-long with! PART 3 - RANKINGS 23 THROUGH 18 23) Wanting More Time to Dedicate to 2018’s Top Indie Games

There are a few websites and podcasts I follow that have tons of game of the year coverage, and it is a great place to get a reminder of those indie games that slipped through the cracks and I completely forgot about or neglected throughout the year. I heard enough praise about three of them that seemed up my alley and before the end of the year I was able to put in a 20-30 minute session with each of these. I wish I had more time for each, but my initial impressions were high for all three and I know I will put more time into them throughout 2019. Yoku’s Island Express is a hybrid of a pinball game and a MetroidVania that somehow delivered on both fronts as I unlocked more paths through an island by flipping my character and ball through a variety of colorful environments. My love for both genres makes me want to return to it ASAP. Minit is a roguelite RPG with an dastardly hook where each session has a one minute timer, but you retain all the items collected on each session that unlocks other paths on the map. I did about 20 sessions and as I got familiar with the game world I already was starting to plan my next steps ahead for my next minute run. Many jovial curses to the developers who intentionally programmed the NPC W-H-O-T-A-L-K-S-T-H-I-S-S-L-O-W to keep me in a nail-biter of a moment to hit the next checkpoint with literally a single second to spare! The last indie game I snuck in some time with was the Super Meat Boy-esque platformer, Celeste. This comes from the same developers who made Towerfall that I just got done shedding some love for above. The instant restarts and checkpoints make its fair-yet-punishing platforming worth the challenge to get through and I can already see its addicting ‘just-one-more-try’ instant respawns reminding me of the longer-than-intended sessions I had with the Trials games and I look forward to them in Celeste! I am only about a half hour in, but have heard nothing but the best of acclaim for its narrative about overcoming personal struggles to make it to the top of a mountain! 22) Fans of Gamers Who Crave Limited Runs

I imagine you have heard of them before, but if not then both Limited Run Games and FanGamer have both been great sites I have been persistently coming back to for primarily physical copies of smaller indie games and top-tier quality gaming memorabilia. I am happy to see Limited Run expanding in 2018 by finally starting to publish games on Switch and landing their more anticipated games in a limited window preorder program so everyone has a shot at getting a copy. It was also encouraging to hear that some of their games will be shipping in smaller quantities to Best Buys across the country so people who do not order their games online have a shot at getting some of their titles the traditional way. Some of the titles I ordered this year from them that I was stoked to get physical copies of include Late Shift, Read Only Memories and Golf Story. That is right, I do not own a Switch yet but ordered Golf Story because I loved the GBC/GBA RPG takes on Mario Golf that Golf Story is the spiritual successor of and I kept hearing how it hits all the right notes for fans of those handheld classics. I anticipate I will get a Switch within the next year pending the inevitable smaller redesign of the system. My only qualm with Limited Run now is with their growth their shipping times have significantly increased. I recall my first few Limited Run games I ordered taking 2-4 weeks to ship, now the last several I got all took 3-5 MONTHS each. Step it up guys! I will also tip my hat to FanGamer for their plethora of must-have merchandise. I loved their meticulously detailed strategy/companion guides for Earthbound and Mother 3. It is awesome they are collaborating with Jeremy Perish to publish deluxe hardcover books of his transcripts for his excellent Works line of anthology retro gaming videos. FanGamer has a ton of artistic shirts, posters and other memorabilia for many top-rated indie games. I ordered my first shirt from them recently with this design that perfectly captures the spirit of WindJammers. I am also perplexed with their sudden infatuation to the classic run-and-gunner, Sunset Riders, FanGamer recently obtained the merchandising rights for. They celebrated the occasion with a unique cosplay promotional video that almost convinced me to order their Sunset Riders branded wallet….almost! 21) 25 Years of the Real-est Interactive Multiplayer in the Room!

Guys, the 3DO is a pretty neat system! Seriously! Of course I did not spend the obscene $700 when it first launched 25 years ago, but I got it for a bargain in 2007 and went on to hunt down many games that I always wanted to try for the platform. Not all of them were winners, but there were several that wound up as worthy inclusions in my library. My recommended games for the 3DO include the awesome party game Twisted, its mascot platformer Gex and the original Need for Speed. 3DO also has excellent versions of Super Street Fighter II Turbo, Family Feud, Madden and arguably the best version of the classic motorcycle racer, Road Rash! Nearing its 25th anniversary and just in time for Halloween, the good people at Your Parents Basement Podcast invited me on to guest host and commemorate one of the 3DO’s spooooop-iest games, the Tia Carrere FMV thriller, The Daedalus Encounter! I busted out my 3DO from the closet and booted up my old save and came pretty darn close to finishing it before the puzzles got to be too much of a brainbuster for me! Riveting times were had breaking down and dissecting the game with the YPB crew which you can check out and download here. 20) Shmuppreciation 2018

One of my favorite podcasts I have been a listener to for over 13 years now is Super-the-Hardest. They use to be primarily videogame-centric, but have since evolved over the years to focus on whatever topics pique their interest such as craft brews, board games and jamming out to vinyl records! One of their longest traditions has always been dedicating March to shmup/space shooter games. I am not a pro shump player by any means, but always am down to pump in a few credits and blast away for as long as I can survive. They have a small, but tight-knit forum community I have always been a part of and when March hit the hosts were asking there if anyone was playing any shmups yet. A couple days went by with little response, and knowing how big shmup-month was for that community in previous years I was suddenly inspired to start up weekly high score chases on the forums there with the focus this year being on three random NES shmups each week. I tried to have a consistent rotation of the three games being one common/popular shmup such as Gradius & 1943, another lesser known domestic release like Alpha Mission & Zombie Nation and finally a imported Famicom game that never saw a stateside release with picks this year including Parodius Da & Gradius II. At least a few us participated each week posting our scores and exchanging tips and breaking down how good/awful that week’s selections were. It was a heck of a month and somehow I managed to keep up posting selections each week and got in time with every game! No idea if I will do it again for 2019, but if I do I think it may be time to upgrade to 16-bits! 19) The 3DS Soul Still Burns!!

I somehow managed to sneak in an hour of time into my 3DS each week. I was ecstatic to track down an English translation for Ace Attorney Investigation 2 that never saw an American release. I loved the first game and always wanted to play the follow-up and got most of the way through the first case. I finally played my first Fire Emblem game by putting in several hours into Fire Emblem Echoes. Hearing that Echoes was a good entry point for the series having played Advance Wars many years ago the gameplay was not that difficult to pick up. It has that same addicting strategy gameplay as Advance Wars, but with a medieval theme and a far richer narrative than what I recalled from my Advance Wars days. Just the couple of sessions I had with Echoes I was already starting to get attached to the cast. Hotel Dusk and its sequel, Last Window are my favorite DS games. They are mystery visual novels, and when I found out earlier in 2018 that some of the developers at Cing who worked on those games went on to make a bite-sized spiritual successor to it on the 3DS eShop called Chase: Cold Case Investigations - Distant Memories I knew I had to get it. I bought this around when it released in 2016 and neglected it until John from the Super the Hardest podcast recapped it earlier in 2018 and inspired me to pick it up. It is essentially a more stripped down version of Cing’s earlier games as it revolves around two detectives interviewing suspects for a hospital blast. Graphics and style remind me of Hotel Dusk and the lead detective in Distant Memories looks quite similar to one Kyle Hyde. It was a decent little visual novel that can be finished in less than three hours, and I hope it gets a follow-up, but it appears this one came and went because I have heard nothing since. I finally started up Theatrhythm 2: Curtain Call. In case you missed out on it before it assembles the protagonists from past Final Fantasy games and makes a fun battle system/rhythm game of over 100 songs from the rich history of Final Fantasy soundtracks while somehow fitting in a intricate narrative too. Wish I had more time to get into it and I think I will have to restart it I manage to deep dive into it because I spent the bulk of my 3DS time once again this year with Dragon Quest VIII. My save file is currently approaching 110 hours in DQVIII. However, the last 15-ish hours have been spent grinding from levels 40-65 for most of my party members for the final boss. To say the boss is a pain is an understatement. I failed multiple times at vanquishing him, thus the hours at grinding away. I will never forget my time with DQVIII, but am looking forward to finishing it on one of my next sessions so I can finally put more time into other games. The 3DS still had a strong 2018 from Nintendo published games and I wound up picking up Captain Toad, Detective Pikachu and WarioWare Gold which I desperately want to dive into! 18) ‘Get Ready for a Cruise Missile!’

I use to play a ton of sports games until several years ago. I took a long hiatus from them to focus on more narrative-driven games. Madden NFL ‘18 premiering its story mode dubbed ‘Longshot’ got me curious at giving the acclaimed football series another go for the first time in five years. I surprisingly dug Madden’s take on a story mode and loved playing as the fictional Devin Wade working his way through the reality show challenges and playing in flashback high school games with lighthearted local announcers providing the unintentional best sports commentary out there. Longshot also had a well-rounded cast filled with some surprising moments I never thought I would get invested in such as getting them sports feels flowing for the Longshot acoustic sing-a-long! The story mode only took a few hours to play through and even if you are not a fan of football games I would recommend giving it a shot as the football parts are few and far between and the story mode is primarily QTE/mini-game focused. Story mode aside, I managed to play a few rounds online against my friend Steve I use to play countless sports games with over the years and it felt good to reignite that rivalry. Madden still plays as good as I remember, and one thing I want to point out from the core game is the new NFL commentators they brought in for ’18 & ’19 with Brandon Gaudin & Charles Davis easily being the best announce team in Madden history that added a ton to the presentation unlike any Madden announce team before them! I did pick up Madden NFL ‘19 recently because it has ‘Longshot Part 2’ which promises to conclude the storyline for Devin Wade and his buddy Colt Cruise, but other than a couple rounds online with Steve again I have yet to dive into it. After catching a couple scenes online I am psyched to see how Longshot concludes and plan on blitzing through it around Super Bowl time like I did with part one in 2018.

If you are not a fan of sim-football and prefer arcade style action in the vein of NFL Blitz than I will instead point you towards Mutant Football League which I played nearly a full season of off-and-on throughout 2018. It is the spiritual successor to EA’s awesome Mutant League Football on the Genesis, and part of me is still surprised how the team did not get a cease-and-desist from EA with a slightly altered name change and bring over so much of the look and feel of the original game. It modernized all the things I loved from the first game with a game engine that plays like a amped up version of Blitz, and retains classic elements of the Genesis game like being able to kill your adversaries in all types of gruesome ways and introducing awesome powered up attacks that can be used once per half to up the brutality. And yes, you can still bribe and kill refs! I was a little bummed Mutant Football League did not get that much of a buzz when it finally released because it had a successful Kickstarter campaign and a follow-up to the Genesis game has been long demanded in the sports gaming circles I follow. A physical copy released later in the year with a new Franchise mode included so hopefully that will bring some new eyes onto the game. If you want more over-the-top arcade-like gameplay out of your football games then by all means give Mutant Football League a try! I also got really into my first basketball-sim in many years. I dabbled with a couple arcade-hoops games over past couple years and really dug the Neo-Geo Arcade Archives re-release of Street Hoop on Xbox One, while the free-to-play Xbox One hoops game, 3-on-3 Freestyle…..not so much. I always stuck with NBA 2K games as my NBA sim of choice since their debut on Dreamcast and picked one up every couple years and played them regularly through 2K11. Early in 2018 however a super cheap digital sale on NBA Live ‘18 convinced me to give it a shot. I have solely been playing its create-a-player story/career mode ‘The One.’ I have been digging it and loved the first several games I played in ‘The One’ proving my worth in street games of 21. Every few games there would be these hilarious FMV updates from a First Take set with Stephen A Smith and Max Kellerman being over-the-top versions of their already over-the-top personalities which convinced me that my created player was going to dominate the street leagues and become the #1 draftee in the NBA….it did not turn out that way, but I am having a blast so far proudly representing the Timberwolves while dishing out far too many three-point attempts than I should be. ---YouTube Break #3--- Re-watching that NBA Live ’18 clip of Stephen A. Smith got me to dig up this compilation of clips of Mr. Smith at his zaniest. Here is the final version of the full Longshot song of which I have no shame having it in my running playlist! PART 4 - RANKINGS 17 THROUGH 14 17) The End Day is a Lie!

I was going to say a couple entries earlier when covering all those NES shmups that I have not played that much NES in years, but that statement would have been false because mere weeks before that I played through the entirety of the post-apocalyptic, action-RPG Crystalis on NES! It was the featured game on the first of two Your Parents Basement podcast episodes I guest hosted on for 2018. I picked up both the NES and GBC versions a couple years ago after hearing countless years of love from the staff at GameCola about it. I managed to play through most of it by the time we recorded that YPB episode and finished it off a few days after that. All these years after its original release, Crystalis is still a fun action-RPG to plow through. I loved the accessibility of the combat, and while the options to choose from to level up seem quaint now, I can imagine how they were top of their league at the time. After beating the NES version I put an hour into the GBC port to see how it held up. I heard the GBC version get a fair amount of slack over the years, but from my initial time with the handheld port it seemed noticeably cleaner and had some useful tips at the opening town that would have benefitted my first time through. I had a great time sharing my experience with the YPB crew and if you are interested in hearing our takes on SNK’s 8-bit RPG then click here to check out that episode. It seemed only fitting that the NES original got its first retro re-release later on in 2018 on the SNK 40th Anniversary Collection on Switch. 16) Pinball Quest 2018

Welcome to my yearly blurb all about feeding my addiction to videogame pinball. In case you skipped around this year-end round-up (I do not blame you!) I will refer you to entry #23 for some quick thoughts on Yoku’s Island Express. I only got a few rounds of my favorite PC-exclusive pinball game, Hyperspace Pinball in 2018, and the last time I played it a couple weeks ago I had a great run and was briefly ecstatic until the leaderboard indicated I missed my personal high-score by a smidge! I also gave a couple runs to what appears to be a mobile pinball game ported to Xbox One in Quantic Pinball. It is a fine little pinball game, but its mobile roots are too apparent and not many upgrades are present to make the console release feel warranted. 2018 was a strange year for Pinball Arcade. I wanted to make the switch to primarily playing it on PS4 in 2017, but that proved difficult upon discovery of my dozens of tables I purchased on PS3/Vita not being import-able to the PS4 version like I was able to for the dozens of tables I acquired for Zen Pinball 2 to work on Pinball FX3. So that meant I would have to buy the tables all over again. I held off for a long time, but I wound up spending roughly $200 on all of the DLC for it upon hearing midway in 2018 all of Pinball Arcade’s collection of tables under license from Williams/Bally would no longer be supported for purchase with only a few weeks notice to be able to buy them and add them to your Pinball Arcade library. Plopping down around $200 all at once for that DLC was a punch in the gut, but ultimately I do not regret it because there are some minor, but noticeable enhancements to the visuals on the PS4 version of Pinball Arcade and it has a slightly cleaner feel to the gameplay too. Additionally the developers at Farsight now have a separate game called Stern Pinball Arcade so the newer Stern tables have a flashier place to reside. I perfectly understand the idea to make the Stern tables pop more on their own platform. The Stern tables purchased theoretically work in both Pinball Arcade and Stern Pinball Arcade, but doing so requires reactivating the purchased license in the clunky Playstation Store interface and it once lead to me to inadvertently purchasing the same table twice.

A couple months later I was stunned to find out that Zen Studios gained the license for the Williams tables and by the end of the year would have their first seven tables from the Williams/Bally collection available for download to Pinball FX3 (PFX3). I have mixed feelings about this. I do like Zen’s optional upgraded graphical enhancements to the tables, but the overall physics for the ball movement does not feel like the authentic movement that Pinball Arcade faithfully represented. There is an option in Pinball Arcade for ‘classic mode’ which kind of slows down the speed of play and leans the gameplay to marginally feel like an authentic pinball experience, but it simply does not cut it overall. Hopefully Zen can take the feedback and continue to improve in future DLC tables. Gripes on the Williams tables aside, I enjoyed the rest of my time in 2018 with PFX3. I have heard the criticism for Zen Studios’ unrealistic style of pinball, but I have always been a fan of theirs and feel there is room for both authentic digital pinball from Pinball Arcade and faster physics with the more fantastical tables from Zen. I finally started to grasp PFX3’s initially intimidating ‘mastery’ system of each table. The mastery system is topping off essentially an experience meter for each table by achieving score goals in each gameplay option available and maxing out several stat meters. I did this for The Infinity Gauntlet, Back to the Future and almost all the way for Medieval Madness. I also got into the weekly online scoring ‘matchup’ league play where PFX3 randomly picks four tables and scores posted by three random players in three skill levels for three minutes of play each week. By toying around with trying to master tables and online score chasing in matchup play it lead to a lot more time invested in Pinball FX3 compared to 2017. 15) Sega Channel 2018

In the summer of 1996 I spent about five or six afternoons a week at my friend’s place playing Sega Channel. No memories of it? Here is some vintage archival footage of its menus of the Sega Channel experience. It was Sega’s sweet-at-the-time service where in coordination with cable companies from 1994-98 you would pay $15/month to have a rotating monthly selection of 40 games playable from a special cartridge that hooked up to the household cable line. Games would download to a temporary internal memory on the cartridge from the cable line over a minute or two and save states were also available. It was the current Netflix streaming of gaming and was way ahead of its time. It was also how I discovered countless Genesis favorites I hunted down at local shops and online after I got my first job a few years later. It took 20 years after Sega Channel shutdown to get a faithful reincarnation of it, but only far better in every way. GameTap sort of brought it back to the PC for the few years it was around in the 2000s. However, Xbox brought it back in full force with its excellent Game Pass service for Xbox One it introduced in 2018. Instead of 40 games available to play each month there are 100+ rotating games for Xbox. Add on Microsoft’s bold move of making all their first party games available on Game Pass on day one of their release and it would be insane not to recommend it, especially for new Xbox One owners. I actually am that insane though and do not have it because of my massive backlog and lack of time to commit. However for new Xbox One owners and/or game players on a budget like students or parents looking to save lots of money getting games for their kids they would be in an ideal position going with Game Pass and a Games for Gold subscription which additionally nets ownership of four games each month to their Xbox games library. 14) Ride or Die

Like pinball games, I also have a yearly blurb on my experiences with racing/driving games for the year. I felt my year in driving titles slightly nudged out my pinball times, thus it being a couple notches higher ranked. If you dear reader are randomly bouncing around this list then I will refer you to entry #25 where I touch on driving games coming out of Steam Early Access such as Road Redemption, Wreckfest, Distance, Jalopy & Super Indie Kart. There were a few driving titles I dabbled this year in that I wish I had more time to plug away at. As you will see later in this round-up, I am a nut for the Sega 80s arcade driving titles like Hang-On & OutRun, and the PS4/Switch release of Horizon Chase Turbo is the best spiritual successor to that type of racer I have seen over the years. They brought on the same composer from those games and the visuals have a nice modern HD look to them that capture the spirit of those 80s greats. It has been a great while since I played a snowmobile racing game and Ski-Doo Snowmobile Challenge was a limited, but fun budget title racer on PS3 that reminded me of a fond time when all I wanted was a no-thrills career mode with a few dozen races and simple stat upgrades to deal with in a career mode. Drive!Drive!Drive! was the final racer I put some minor time into, and that was an extraordinary title where I would have to bounce around multiple cameras to control simultaneous races. At the beginning of the year I was wrapping up the last dozen or so races/events in the 360 version of Forza Horizon 2. I had another good time with it like its open-world predecessor and took advantage of that rewind button to avoid retrying the same track over and over, but looking back I preferred the experience of the first FH more as the sequel seemed more of the same, but in a less spectacular backdrop. Friends are telling me to skip three and jump to the new fourth game in the series getting a lot of buzz online now, but the third game has that tempting Australian outback setting I froth to explore and on top of that the unique Hot Wheels DLC pack I heard nothing but superb things about. So I will continue to be extremely behind on that series and plan to jump into FH3 later this year.

I went on an odd Monster Truck binge in 2018. The Xbox One digital store had Monster Jam: Crush-It available for dirt cheap one week, and having a modicum of nostalgic memories of past entries in the long running budget title series I wound up taking a chance on it. After spending far more time than I should have with it, ‘budget’ is a generous description for Crush-It, because this racer is full of absurd physics, bizarre collision detection and endless other bugs. After a ton of bugs causing too many rage-inducing moments I beat enough tracks and finished all the challenges to make Crush-It of all games to have the dubious honor of being the first Xbox One game I unlocked the full 1000 gamerscore in. After wrapping up my time with Crush-It I stumbled into picking up a copy of Monster Truck Madness 64. Microsoft was developing the series at that point on PC for awhile, but ported it to N64 and had a pre-GTA Rockstar Games publish it for them. Unfortunately the Rockstar branding could not have saved MM64 as it too was also rough around the edges with terribly loose steering that had me dreading every corner. It did feature the nWo muscle trucks at the time though that brought back memories of the old WCW Motorsports advertising. The racing game I put the most time into in 2018 was The Crew. Not the sequel that came out later in the year, but the original game. I got around halfway in it via staggered play over the previous year or two, but with the release of the sequel approaching I grinded away in the couple of months leading up to its release to finish the avenge your brother’s death storyline which I actually kind of dug. There was a surprisingly gripping cinema building up to campaign’s final race where I was legit getting behind protagonist Alex Taylor. I had fun just messing around and cruising around UbiSoft’s condensed open-world of the continental United States and tracking down their take on iconic landmarks. I messed around a little here and there with their instantaneous online coop/versus multiplayer reminiscent of Test Drive Unlimited, and had a few fun online moments but I enjoyed most of my time in the single player. Gameplay wise it is not five stars by any means, and I would prefer Forza Horizon any day, but there was something about the gritty underground nature of The Crew and its car-culture-gang-warfare story that kept me sticking with it. I eventually picked up the sequel recently on a bargain bin digital sale for the ultimate season pass edition being 60% off so who knows, I likely see myself in 2019 playing The Crew 2 and Forza Horizon 3 concurrently at my regular on-and-off pace. ---YouTube Break #4--- I am always a sucker for when a racing game injects a storyline to its single player campaign, especially if it is completely ridiculous! Hey, you know what other racing game had super-cheesy-yet-awesome cutscenes? The original Need for Speed: Most Wanted in 2005. Here is a link to its entire half hour of cutscenes. Eat your heart out Tokyo Drift! They came a long way from EA’s DIY live-action cinemas from the original 3DO game that you can see right here. EA tried to recapture the glory days of their cornball cutscenes with 2015’s Need for Speed. It has some moments like first person fist-bumping and energy drink chugging that you see in their entire bro-ness right here, but 2005’s Most Wanted will always reign supreme in my book! PART 5 - RANKINGS 13 THROUGH 10 13) Spoooooky Gaming For Halloween I brought up to my board game/videogame night friends Derek, Brooke & Ryan about doing a spooky gaming marathon. They did me one better and recommend I bring over my copy of Hidden Agenda on PS4 to binge through that I have been occasionally throwing out for an option over the previous months. Hidden Agenda kind of snuck under-the-radar towards the end of 2017 as it came from the same team that made the critically acclaimed teenage spooky thriller, Until Dawn. This is another spooky-thriller, but designed to be played with your friends and finished in one session within three hours. It is a game that requires a smartphone app to play, and luckily it came close, but did not deplete our entire charge by the time the credits rolled. The app had some clever functionality that kept tabs on case notes and presented us with options to vote on which way to take the story next like having to choose which part of the case to investigate, or which path to split off into. While the story was a little all over the place it managed to get us riled up and jumpy a few times, and was still a blast to play through in its entirety in a single night on Halloween weekend. Now I need to replay it on my own to have complete control over the story so on my calendar this October I am going to write a big reminder to replay Hidden Agenda and finally bust open and plow through Until Dawn. 12) Back-to-Back!!!

I have been avoiding most co-op gaming that cannot be finished in a single session like Hidden Agenda for a few years now due to lack of time to finish lengthier co-op games. I made one exception this year where my same friend Matt and I met up twice to persevere through A Way Out. It is a coop game clocking in at around a whopping six hours. That is a lot for me nowadays. Matt and I absolutely loved our time with A Way Out. Spending the first couple of hours getting to know the prison system and plan our escape was a rush and it reminded me of the equally awesome first few hours of Xbox’s Chronicles of Riddick. Crawling up the air shaft with that back-to-back mini-game will go down as one of my favorite moments in co-op gameplay. The plot I found myself getting into where two would-be fugitives found themselves teaming up to escape prison and get back to their loved ones. It kind of disappointingly unravels in the final moments with some bold narrative choices the developers made that I am still processing in my mind on how I feel about the final hour of play. The ‘must talk to everyone’ extremist in me was addicted to talking to nearly all NPCs and have brief choice-based conversations with all of them. The developers at Hazelight Studios cram in diverse gameplay throughout with plenty of exploring, interrogating, QTE segments, platforming, gunfights, intense car chase sequences and a big highlight being a hospital chase sequence where A Way Out seamlessly bounces back and forth between the two characters as they get split up and must evade the police. If you are looking for something fresh and different than the infinite amount of co-op shooters available, then give A Way Out a chance. 11) ‘This is a No-Smoking Flight!’

If you do not recognize that quote it is from the adorable master of cooking eggs, Sunny, at the close of one of the numerous lengthy cutscenes that Metal Gear Solid 4 was known for. The ending cutscene is literally the length of a movie, and the cinemas between each of MGS4’s acts are right around an hour each and I would not want it any other way! MGS4 was the first MGS game I finished nearly 10 years ago and I decided it was only appropriate to revisit it after finishing the first three MGS games in the past couple of years. I got so much more out of MGS4 this way by actually getting the countless past references to the core trilogy of games this time around. I loved that MG4 also had memorable debuting characters like the aforementioned Sunny and the soda-chugging gun-runner, Drebin! Since I last played MGS4 Konami has also patched in trophies so it was worthwhile to hunt down those and look into some that swayed me to approach gameplay in a different fashion which yielded a refreshing second go-around. After finishing MGS4, I continued my ritual of view that installment’s complete gameplay commentary from Dan and Drew at GiantBomb to get essentially a third playthrough experience out of MGS4. I did not make major progress in the rest of my Metal Gear quest otherwise throughout the year. I did get a little ways into MGS5 at the beginning of the year, but then felt compelled to drop it and play through MGS4 before it instead. That was probably a wrong decision in hindsight, but at least it gives me an excuse to restart it and experience one of gaming’s grandest opening missions yet again. I did pick up the GBC version of Metal Gear Solid last year for a decent price at a local retro shop, so if I ever do finish MGS5 I would like to play the GBC title along with the MSX versions of the original two games. 10) Better Late than Never

I have no idea why I held off seven years on getting around to the highly-touted Saints Row the Third, especially after loving the first two games and finishing them in quick fashion right around their release. The third game in the open-world crime action series upped the zany factor the series debuted in the second game with some of its activities by introducing all kinds of over-the-top elements in the story missions and into the weapons, upgrades, you name it. Here are a few examples so you can see for yourself. Saints Row the Third gave the franchise its own satirical identity when before it was only a pretty solid GTA-clone. Waiting seven years to get to this classic made certain parts of the graphics seem a little long in the tooth, but for the most part the visuals and core gameplay held up nicely. Experimenting with the huge variety of weapons and vehicles available made cruising through the open world a lot of fun. Same goes for the series trademark offering of mini-game ‘activities.’ The developers at Volition pushed every button to get the most out of that M rating to make its missions standout like no other as they go in places you will not believe. I went on to play both pieces of the story-based DLC content which take the Saints in filming their own Gangstas in Space movie and chasing down an evil mutant clone of series mascot, Johnny Gat. If you missed out on this landmark achievement in open-world gameplay then consider this synopsis somewhat timely since THQ Nordic will be releasing Saints Row the Third later this year on switch. ---YouTube Break #5--- Grab a glass of water dear reader for still sticking with me through this unbelievable amount of words! If you stuck with last year’s round-up to the very end, then you will remember this video I will treat you to a little early. That is right it is time for the epic John Cena animated prank call of doom! Speaking of Mr. ‘You Can’t See Me’ here is a fun clip I recently ran into John promoting his recent BumbleBee film where he chats up Matt McConaughey about old school Texas wrestling. What is that? You want a non wrestling-related video, fine I get it, then enjoy this take from James Rolfe as he breaks down two childhood favorite video game themed game shows I grew up with in the early 90s, Video Power & Nick Arcade. PART 6 - RANKINGS 9 THROUGH 4 9)Discovering my Favorite Gaming Blog

Early in 2018 I was scouring the webs digging up info on the must-have import games for the Super Famicom/SNES. I came across this top 50 list ranking the most obscure SNES imports from a blog called RVGFanatic. It is a blog primarily dedicated to covering SNES/Super Famicom games, but also has the occasional feature covering a game on another system or a random personal life story. The site has been around for over a decade and RVGFanatic continues to publish a few new entries a month. His writing and coverage reminds me of the writing style dominant in gaming magazines from the 90s and RVGFanatic stated in various articles that was his intention with the design in the blog. I spent a good chunk of the year revisiting his site and perusing the archives there because there is an earnest quality to his writing that captures the sheer joy of growing up with those games. He manages to be both reflective and current with his writing recognizing pros and cons the games have been known for, while also recapturing the experience of playing that game for the first time. A prime example of this is his recent review of Clay Fighter. It perfectly encapsulated my memories of the much hyped fighter looking wicked cool with its revolutionary graphics which helped hide its haphazard gameplay. His occasional personal blogs were metaphorical page-turners too as I related with him perfectly to his excellent write-up of rental store memories as well with his piece on wrestling nostalgia of the Hulk-a-Mania years of the then-WWF. I can recommend so many more of his articles and reviews, but instead I recommend you dive in and get lost in RVGFanatic’s archives like I did! 8) My Handpicked Top Gaming Videos of 2018 I have been scouring the YouTubes and GiantBombs throughout the year and have some of my highest recommendations of my favorite videos to add to your watch later q! Without further ado, here are my top picks of 2018… GiantBomb - Die Another Friday| Winter Games 2018 | Gaiden the Ring & Get in the Ring| Mario Party Party 11 | Quiet Man Quick Look | Wreckfest Quick Look | Detective Pikachu Quick Look Jeremy Parish ‘Works’ Videos - Too hard to pick just one all of them are so informative and comprehensive. Pick a system of Works videos from the playlists indexed here MetalJesus - Game Pickups with Reggie | Vinyl Record Pickups | Wii and PSP Hidden Gems |PS2 Hidden Gems Gaming Historian – Story of Punchout | Story of Tetris Game Sack – Star Trek Games Up Up Down Down - E3 Live – Elite vs New Day Street Fighter V Challenge | Edge and Christian NHL 95 Faceoff No Clip – History of Bethesda AVGN - Earthbound | Home Alone games with MaCauly Caulkin Same Name, Different Game – FirePro Wrestling | Punisher | Street Fighter Alpha Classic Gaming Quarterly - Let’s Read TurboPlay | Nintendo Power | Game Pro | Official DreamCast Magazine Scott the Woz - Wii Ware Chronicles | Devils Third | Madden NFL 08 That list there is days full of quality videos to last you throughout 2019, I hope you dig them as much as I did! 7) Videogame Vinyl

How the hell did I go down this whole!? I recall first getting clued into the world of emerging videogame soundtracks on vinyl from this music primer episode of Retronauts. Later in 2017 a friend gifted me his old record player since he recently upgrade along with a couple records. Since I had the record player in my possession I figured I had to had to track down a just a few records for it and I heard good things about soundtrack vinyls from Mondo and I went and ordered several records from them. That was the first domino tumbling right there, and from that point it was inevitable to prevent the rest tumbling after them. Throughout 2018 other websites I follow like Limited Run, Data Disc and FanGamer started to offer videogame OSTs on vinyl and I made several more purchases throughout the year. I do not have hundreds of vinyls mind you, but I finished the year with around 15. I made sure to track down some iconic videogame soundtracks like a few from the Castlevania series, Earthbound and Snatcher. There were also a few oddballs that still boggle my mind why they got a vinyl release like Windjammers and Mortal Kombat I & II that I convinced myself I had to have. I am not buying these to sit on the shelf though as I have been getting some quality use out of my record player jamming out to soundtracks while cleaning the house and doing DDP Yoga three times a week. 6) Hey-a Fellers

It was practically impossible to avoid getting sucked up by the whirlwind of hype in the months leading up to Red Dead Redemption 2’s release. I also loved its predecessor so much that I knew I had to be there day one to be in on the conversation going around the gaming press zeitgeist about RDR2’s opening acts. South Park got in on the RDR2 hype train too with a couple episodes where the whole town is addicted to it. Rockstar does not disappoint with their narrative and audio/visual presentation. I will not bore you with the details you have likely read elsewhere by now, but rest assured the open-world, cast, narrative, visuals and especially the score and voice acting is aces all around! Not all is aces though as RDR2’s multi-faceted control scheme has been divisive among many in the gaming media. Bottom line, there are too many functions for every button on the controller, and at points I completely forgot certain controls and had to do a quick online search for a refresher on how to do specific abilities like dual wielding and changing coats. Those gripes quickly washed away after extended sessions with RDR2 where I cannot help but get immersed and lose myself in the world. I spent so much time looking forward to getting distracted by whatever quick instant side mission or event that popped up traversing to my next checkpoint. According to my progress I am 36% the way through RDR2 after what seems roughly that many hours in the game, however I am only in chapter two because I keep having so much fun clearing out whatever side missions get accumulated in my checklist. I easily see many more hours to come in RDR2 throughout 2019. 5) The Hidden Beauty of Shield Snow-Surfing!

2017’s #1 pick, The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild took up so much of my playtime in 2018 that it managed to eeek its way into my top five of 2018! There is simply so much to explore, see and do and I am insane at refusing to take advantage of fast travel due to fear of missing out on seeing cool stuff. The photo I attached here showing my 133 hours of total play time was taken shortly before Halloween and I have put at least several more hours in since then. I will give a shoutout to my co-worker Mike who has been awesome to trade tips and stories with since Breath of the Wild’s launch. He gave me a ton of great pointers and his advice has made my experience with BotW a better one! Mike filled me in all about the wondrous technique that is shield surfing! I later discovered more about it when my random traversing lead me to a corner of the wintry mountainous region of the map where I was taught shield surfing and how that lead to the thrills surfing through the snow blanketed mountains of Hyrule. I have made so much progress this year! I am down to needing to unlock only two more parts of the map where my one last divine beast to conquer lies before finally taking on Hyrule Castle and Ganon! I loved my time in the Lost Woods and Lomei Labyrinth Island that was a hoot to find my way out of. I finally got the Master Sword. I took some stabs at the DLC trials for the Master Sword which is reminiscent of the extremely tough-but-fair challenge that is Eventide Island. I failed after several attempts, but would like to conquer them to increase the Master Sword’s power! Speaking of DLC I waded around with a handful of the DLC quests available and unlocked the Korok mask from the DLC quests which looks funky as hell, but it has helped me amass at least triple the amount of Korok Seeds I would have found on my own. I want to jump into the DLC quest that unlocks the ‘Master Cycle Zero’ (aka Hyrule Motorcycle) as footage I have seen so far looks straight-up rad cruising through Hyrule in their trippy looking hot-rod. Mark my words, Breath of the Wild, in 2019 I will finally finish the core quest and vanquish Ganon and unlock the Master Cycle Zero! 4) Eeeeeeelsss Oxenfree was my game of the year in 2016. I loved its art style, mysterious narrative and especially its script where the teenagers would one second be trying to solve this multi-layered mystery on an island and the next have a heart-to-heart chat about stereotypical teenage drama. Night in the Woods was receiving a lot of the same buzz over it also being a Narrative Exploration game with a relatable 2D art style and similar plot hooks to the point that among the gaming press it was generating buzz of being 2017’s top Narrative Exploration title. After looking into Night in the Woods I could not help but be reeled in by its plot where a failed college student drops out of college two years in and returns to her small podunk town of Possum Springs to try and recapture her days of chilling with her high school friends but only for them all to be later caught up in local town superstitions proving not to be so superstitious.

As attractive as the plot was I could not help but, I would not say be turned off, but rather mystified about the decision to go with humanoid-structured animals representing all the characters. First impressions watching initial gameplay of Night in the Woods made that choice in character style difficult to suspend my disbelief and maintain my focus on checking out the game. I am not saying that is a bad thing, I am simply stating that is what was perplexing my mind. There must have been others who felt similar to me because there was also a harsher vocal contingent who was upset with people avoiding the game due to the art style who wrote a few articles stating that if you were avoiding playing this because of animals as characters than to F off. That led to me not wanting to get caught up in all that hoopla so I decided it was best to avoid that controversy. It was only around game of the year time at the end of 2017 where I heard friendlier supporters of the game rally behind it with high praise that convinced me to give it a chance and start it up at the beginning of 2018. I am relieved I did because Night in the Woods is a kickass Narrative Exploration game! The writing is right up there with Oxenfree as all the characters captured that local post-high school angst and rebellion of trying to make it in the real world and things not quite working out. I settled into a convenient routine of daily life gameplay where the player character Mae would check in with her parents and of course with me being me, make sure to talk to every local I would come across because they had something different to say every day! The dialogue for every major and minor character was so spot on that it made going out of my way to talk to everyone worthwhile and random spots in town had special one-time moments going in with periphery characters that if I did not check out I would have completely missed out on such as a poetry reading contest, breaking light bulbs behind a corner store and checking out the stars with your old teacher.

There are a lot of singular moments that really stuck with me in Night in the Woods. Every day in the game you are presented with the option of going out on a side-adventure with one of Mae’s two best friends Gregg or Bae. I chose to do all mine with Bae so if I do get around to playing through this again I will do Gregg’s side stories on my replay to have at least a little bit of new content playable in each day of gameplay. Bae has some priceless moments with Mae where the two have serious chats about their most personal feelings that few other games I have seen dared, and they also have some priceless lighthearted moments where the two get mischievous in a dilapidated mall, complete with a mini-game on trying to steal from a Hot Topic-esque store. The most hard-hitting moment that I vividly recall was when Mae’s mom has a bad day and does a 180 heel turn on her daughter! It hurt so much! Mommmmm!!!! I was thinking once Night in the Woods was going to focus more on the supernatural mystery it would take away from Mae’s personal drama that was so irresistible to get caught up in. Thankfully, that was not the case as it was doubly entertaining to watch Mae’s crew come together and discover the truth behind the superstitions plaguing Possum Springs. As you can tell I got so into Night in the Woods’ page-turning narrative that within about a half hour of starting the thought of the characters being animals did not cross my mind, and looking back on it the designs of the animals corresponded appropriately to the personalities they were representing. Minus the handful of over-ambitious dream sequences that were a little bit of a chore to get through and I might have given this a nod over Oxenfree. That split hair aside, Night in the Woods is a spectacular Narrative Exploration game and hangs in the upper elite tier of them with Oxenfree, Firewatch and Gone Home so if these games are up your alley make sure you do not make the same mistake I did and hold off on Night in the Woods for this long. ---YouTube Break #6--- Holy hell, I did not intend to turn my listing for Night in the Woods into a full-on review, but I could not help myself! Good news though dear reader, we are finally at the last YouTube break as we approach the final three entries of my Top 36 Gaming Experiences of the Year!!! So let us cleanse our palates from games for a moment and grab a Yoo-Hoo from the fridge and mix it with a shot of Rumchata as we watch my last YouTube recommendations. Cinemassacre started a new line of videos on their channel in 2018 that I got into called Rental Reviews. Those reviews are four guys gathering around and breaking down a new or classic movie they watched earlier that week and it reminded me of going to films with a few friends and hanging outside the theater for awhile rambling on about how much we loved or hated that movie. The Cinemassacre crew has some fun with the episodes with mini sketches introducing the episodes and random mid-episode gags. My favorite episodes from their first year that I recommend the most are for Star Trek V, Mortal Kombat: Annihilation, Rental Store Memories, Street Fighter, Die Hard & Commando. Now that we got all that movie criticism out of the way, let us proceed with the final three entries for the year. Thank you all to have hung in with me so far on this one-of-a-kind game of the year journey! PART 7 - RANKINGS 3 THROUGH 1 3) Returning to the Midwest Gaming Classic

From 2007-2013 one of my favorite times of the year was attending a local retro game expo, The Midwest Gaming Classic. Many great times were had there hunting down retro games, hanging out with an awesome forum community I once frequented, classic sessions of late-night karaoke and checking out tons of arcade machines and game consoles set up on free play. Unfortunately the timing of it always fell in a rough time of the year for me and it grew increasingly difficult to make time for it each year until it came down to where I had to stop going for four years. I was not going to make it this year again until a couple of my online gaming friends who I hung out with at MGC before and still keep in touch with asked if I was making it and that convinced me to pull some strings at work and manage to split up some vacation days I had coming so I was able to make the 12-hour drive out to Milwaukee and back home with a couple hours to spare before my first shift back at work. Bear with me as I give yet another shoutout to Glenn and Jeff for reaching out and asking me about MGC because it resulted in an awesome weekend with some wicked weather to dance around to make it there and back. Wound up hanging out and touching base again with tons of great people I had not seen in four or five years. We had a blast hanging out late night after the show playing SNES games on a projector until we were zombies and watching the spiritual successor to King of Kong in Man vs. Snake. It also helped that MGC has moved to a bigger and nicer venue from the last time I went with room to grow. It was like MGC got revitalized by having adequate room for the mammoth vendor halls, game museum, free play arcade and conference rooms for speakers and panels. I caught a few panels on retro gaming and hung out with On the Stick’s Joe Drilling talking wrasslin’ and retro gaming after his panel. I succeeded in my game hunting quest in the vendor hall to hunt down the last couple of NES PowerPad games I did not own, and accidentally came across a homebrew bag toss game I never heard of before called Tailgate Party that I picked up to complete the collection. It proved to be a epic time that I was barely able to pull off at the last minute, but I do not regret it because it was yet another classic MGC weekend for the ages! 2) Forklift Races

It is kind of hard to place how much I love both Shenmue I & II. I got a theory from 1997-2000 for people who played either Final Fantasy VII, Metal Gear Solid or Shenmue fresh off their release. For those three games, people would be so blown away by their then-groundbreaking new standards set for their cinematic cutscenes and ambitious narratives that they would remain forever loyal to that particular game and swear by it forever no matter how credible the negative criticism is out there for those games. That is exactly what happened to me with Shenmue as it was the first of those three games I played, and I have seen people react in near-identical fashion to the other two games. I am aware of the criticism for Shenmue and I will not deny it, but there is so much else going for it that won me over that it made me overlook it and enabled me to have one of the best single player experiences in a game ever. These last few years I was getting the itch to replay the original Shenmue when the Kickstarter was announced and funded in record time for Shenmue III. I was pleasantly surprised Sega quietly announced they were releasing a HD remaster of the first two games for current platforms to cash in on the upcoming sequel. As soon as the remaster collection hit in the summer of 2018 I dropped all other gaming and cruised through the first Shenmue within a month. I was initially trepid that the unique controls would be so outdated that Shenmue would be near unplayable. It was indeed a clumsy control scheme to get reacquainted with for my first 10-15 minutes, but after that I was whisked away back to 2000 again when I first experienced Shenmue and I was reminded how much I loved the setting of Dobuita. There are plenty of cheesy characters filled with so-awful-its-great voice acting that it was a treat reliving it all over again.

Like Night in the Woods I developed a regular daily routine while in the process of hunting down clues to find out more on who killed Ryo’s father so he could avenge his death. I would start off the day going to the local corner vending machines and grabbing an iced coffee and capsule toy. Ryo has got to have his morning coffee with the absurdly drawn-out drinking animation every morning like any other ordinary person! I would talk to as many regular shopkeepers I would about finding the latest clue and occasionally would have to battle off some street thugs for information or chase them down in a QTE sequence that Shenmue helped institutionalize among games. A guilty pleasure was visiting You Arcade nearly every in-game day for a round of a perfectly emulated version of Hang-On that I kind of was starting to ‘get gud’ at the checkpoint-based racer by the end of Shenmue. Eventually I got Ryo his infamous job driving forklifts as the plot came to a boil with Ryo hot on the tail of his father’s killer! Every day at work started off with a forklift race that had a catchy theme song I made up lyrics to nod along with for momentum. There was an achievement for winning a race…..it was the only achievement I failed to achieve! The penultimate 70-man mega-battle leading up to the final boss fight was a rush and a half to experience all over. Again, there was some outdated controls and other quirkiness that was noticeable, but it did not get in the way from my unabashed love for the series resulting in my replay of the orginal Shenmue being my second best gaming experience of 2018! I cannot recommend it for everyone as I have seen the nature of that game rub some people the wrong way and my only answer for that is Shenmue is not for everybody. My spirits were riding high after finishing it that I started watching GiantBomb’s endurance run of it recently, and I went out and tracked down the vinyl OST for Shenmue and additionally the vinyl OST for Hang-On as well. Yup, I am kind of into Shenmue just a hair or two. I did not start up Shenmue II yet off the remaster set and plan to plow through it before Shenmue III’s currently planned August 2019 release. 1) Oh my God, You Killed Connor!

After 16,000 words we are finally here at #1! I know Detroit: Become Human has some hot-button controversies around it and if you decided to avoid the game I totally get it and respect that. Now that I got that out of the way let me start by saying I have been a huge fan of Quantic Dreams going back to Indigo Prophecy and Heavy Rain. I even dug Beyond: Two Souls regardless of that title getting messy at a few points. I know each game has their fair share of nitpicks, but the thing Quantic Dreams nails is how they branch out their stories with its multitude of choice-based gameplay having actual impactful results in the narrative. This is not like most Telltale games where the greater arc stays the same, but the journey is slightly altered. No, characters can abruptly die when presented with a sudden major decision or major paths can be altered to skip entire levels. That is what I loved about Quantic Dreams’ games is these major chances they take on their games and Detroit absolutely kills it in these departments. Quantic also lives up to their past precedents set by moving the bar for Detroit being a true technical marvel and one of the best looking games this generation of consoles. This is coming from a person playing on a slim PS4 and not a 4K Pro system so I can only imagine the improvements if I were to play on a 4K setup. Like Heavy Rain and Indigo Prophecy, Detroit follows the story arcs of several characters. All four are androids at different states of becoming ‘deviant’ and thinking for themselves. Each character path has major moments where I had to pause the game and think over the imperative decision I was presented with. Quantic Dreams is clever at masking some choices as right or wrong that created some moments that I will never forget. Android Detective Connor and his human partner Detective Anderson were my favorite characters to follow throughout the game. Connor can get killed off like other characters in the game, but unlike other characters he is always instantly replaceable from the agency. I did not know that when my Connor perished in a jaw-dropping way I did not see coming. I instantly debated on rewinding my last save to play it differently, but I sternly stuck to my decisions the whole game no matter how they played out. I was relieved to see Connor come back and continue his love/hate relationship with Anderson, and eventually became amused by the inadvertent ways my decision making kept getting my Connor killed.

The other characters all had nearly equal major moments to get behind with a few examples such as saving a daughter from her abusive father in one of the most intense escape sequences in Detroit, rescuing a bunch of experimented androids from a psychopath, leading a android-rights revolution to trying to stealthily escape from the madness to the Canadian border. Quantic Dreams always has had Quick Time Events (QTE) button prompts handle the majority of their gameplay, and they have evolved it with each of their games to have the best implementation of QTE in gaming. Minus a few key moments they almost never result in a instant game over if one QTE prompt is missed and there usually is a few chances to correct a mistake in order to recover and win the scene…or you can intentionally fail and flub through a fight or chase scene like a dummy to hilariously disastrous results. Depending on how you succeed through the prompts and the narrative based decisions made results in an ostensibly infinite amount of endings for each character. Quantic Dreams introduced a remarkable new feature at the end of each scene where a branching tree of decision options is displayed showing the choices made and blank boxes representing other options available and the percentage of the connected PS4 users that picked each option. From this same dialogue tree box checkpoints can be selected to pick up right from there in the gameplay scene to change a decision you were unsatisfied with. After finishing Detroit within two days I took advantage of this and hopped into one key part of the plot where Connor is presented with a choice that essentially gets the ball rolling for the final two-to-three hours of gameplay. I replayed that final chunk of scenes three more times within a week to see big differences in the endings for each character. Some did not survive, others endings all my characters made it to the end while others wound up skipping out on some of the most pivotal scenes in the entire game based on earlier decisions. I knew two other coworkers who were on the fence on picking up Detroit who were fans of Quantic’s previous games and I insisted on borrowing out my copy and we later went on to thoroughly breakdown how we handled key decisions and our various endings. It is insanely rare for a game to cause me to replay it multiple times that soon and that is saying something special about Detroit: Become Human and why it is my #1 gaming experience of 2018. ---The End?---

My word tally count is now tipping over 17,000 words so I think I better end this. It took me nearly 10 days to write this, and I do not blame you if it took that long to read it. That said I hope this proved to be a best of the year list/round-up like no other you experienced! Once again, if you liked what you read and want more of my end of the year ramblings then I will refer you to my best of 2017 and best of 2016 top gaming experiences features. So until next year…..oh wait I almost forgot it would be inappropriate of me to suddenly end this without rewarding you with a few more YouTube recommendations! I failed in unearthing my all-time favorite SNL sketch of Sports Center with Ray Ramono and Tim Meadows, so this sketch on the origins of the iconic NBA on NBC Theme will have to suffice. Need a refreshing beverage after getting through this list; Dusty Rhodes has the answer for you! These sparring kickboxers needed some beverages after getting bombarded in their training session by a acapella group. Mr. Worf wants to drain his sorrows in other beverages after witnessing this montage of his fails. Finally, here is a nice compilation of background music for your home with the top 100 ranked N64 songs of all time. Ok that is seriously it for 2018, thank you again everyone for riding this out with me! If you want to send any feedback my way I would love to hear it so reach out to me on my Twitter @Gruel or email dkulas @ hotmail.com.

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icyroseslove-blog · 6 years

Text

GHOSTWRITER

ghost·writ·er

/ˈɡōstˌrīdər/

noun

a person whose job it is to write material for someone else who is the named author.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Identity is the single most important thing when it comes to the art of ghostwriting. In fact, it’s what defines the business as a whole. There are two types of identities a person will find in the ghostwriting industry: the famous and the enigmatic.

The famous are the stars, the ones who appear on TV with dazzling smiles and a charming bounce in their step. They’re the artists who have their names printed into record books with a net value attached. The famous have giant followings and their faces hung on the walls of a squealing teenage girl’s room, covered in a protective lamination to defend against her baby brother’s invasions. In dehumanizing terms, they’re the perfect products and money making tools of a company. In ghostwriting terms, they’re the buyers.

The enigmatic, which are more commonly known as the ghostwriters, are the famous’ unknown secrets. They’re the ones who sit at a desk for hours, painting the paragraphs that will soon be filling the best sellers under another person’s name, or counting the measures to a star’s greatest hit. The ghostwriters, who are the sellers, are the people who make a creation that someone else will soon take credit for. Their names do not go down in history for being diligent workers, and most of the time, they don’t want to be known. That’s why the sellers choose their careers. They, of free will, become the ghosts of a world that know the art from their fingertips.

But there is one type of identity that allows a person to be both the famous and the enigmatic. Some call it a double life, while others call it a symbol. But the identity has a true name: aliases. Pen names allow people to become the ghostwriters of themselves, sitting down to write a novel that their second name will assume the attention of. There would be a name to the work, but still no face to go with it.

Androkles didn’t feel that it was necessary to have a face assigned to a novel. In fact, he preferred being faceless, because it meant he could go to the ice cream shop two blocks down from his house without having paparazzi shove expensive cameras in his face. After all, he was the most popular writer of the 21st century.

Androkles Hemmer, or more commonly known to the world as Andrew Homer, was the man responsible for writing 12 novels, 10 plays, 3 musicals, and hundreds of ghostwritten songs for the music industry in the span of a few years. He was the author of the most famous play in modern times, One is a Thousand. The extent of his fame and achievement was international. Often times, he’ll see yet another critic praising the philosophical aspects of his novels or a fan gushing about the flowery romance between the two leads of a play in another language.

He leaned back in his chair, tapping his pen against the blank paper presented in front of him. There was a need to write gnawing at him, his mind pouring over possible story ideas. They were good, in fact, they were probably so original it could spawn a few new genres, but there was something about them that felt empty, something non-genuine, which was the complete opposite of what Androkles was often eulogized for.

There was a play that was itching to be produced onto paper. But there were no characters, no twisted and selfish motivations the protagonist was harboring for the greater good conjuring themselves in the writer’s mind. That was odd. But he knew exactly what he was going through after finding he couldn’t create anything for months: a writer’s block.

Groaning, he placed the pen down on the desk and stretched his sore muscles. Androkles kicked the chair, grumbling about how he needed to buy a better one. Deciding to take a small break before continuing his work, he walked into his living room and opened his laptop. The light lit up the dim room, causing his pupils to shrink from the bright source. He checked his singular social media account, which had millions of followers that he didn’t know he would gain. He rarely posted anything, and often it was just pictures with no words for context. There were countless pictures of his cat, Andrew, who was most likely outside killing something before he presented it to Androkles. The male looked at the most recent post, dated to be published last month.

yay strawberry

It was a picture of the pot that was on his front porch currently. There was a small green sprout bursting from the soil, morning dew making the plant dip a bit. Admittedly, he was terrible at taking care of plants, but the seed proved to be strong, growing despite his inconsistent watering schedule.

He scrolled through the feed, looking at insignificant and important things alike. It was the usual on the website; the front page was filled with news about trends, celebrities, and political decisions, as well as rising musicians (some of which he wrote title songs for at one point). But there was always a singular article about him, who was one of the biggest accounts on the site. It was the same topic that sprung up over and over, becoming even more complex as the years progressed: Who was Andrew Homer?

At this point, everyone knew it was simply a pen name, not a real one. Besides his cat, the only shred of information he ever shared with the media is that he likes writing with feathered pens.

(Everyone thought he was pointing to quills. He was actually talking about fluffy pens, the $1 ones with the soft fluff at the top and a plastic tip to cover the ballpoint end when you were done. He doesn’t need expensive materials be successful. The quill eventually became his trademark.)

Suddenly, his phone rang, blaring out the notes to the default ringtone. Androkles pulled it out of his pocket, not bothering to check the ID because he knew only one person had his phone number.

“Hello, Ryo.”

“Hi there, Androkles! Are you in high spirits today?”

Androkles rolled his eyes, the corners of his mouth pulling a bit. “Spare me the jokes, please. I have an ache in my wrist and I’d rather not make it worse by facepalming. What do you need?”

“Always the straightforward man. Well, it’s best if I get to the point. A client wants to hire you to write a song for him. He’s a musician named Phanuel, have you heard of him? He’s the guy who just peaked at the top of the Billboards just last week.”

He hummed in reply. The writer had the radio on yesterday, cooking as he mindlessly bobbed his head to a bubblegum-pop song that he composed a number of years ago (the client was adamant about making it appeal to as many people as possible. He begrudgingly accepted as he wrote a V-vi-IV progression in C major), when a radio host rambled with a caller about a rising star named Phanuel. Androkles brushed off the commentary quickly, as his eggs were starting to burn.

“Yes, I know him. The person who sang ‘Our Letters,’ right?”

“Right on the dot. He called to ask for a written song. Any genre and whatever you’d like.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Really? That’s a lot more creative freedom than I’m usually given. Are there really no details the client wants me to put in the song?”

“Actually, that’s where there’s going to be some complications.” There was a silence. Androkles waited for him to continue. “He wants to discuss the message of the song in person at your house. Face to face.”

Androkles froze.

“Wait, did I hear you correctly? Did you say that a client actually wants to meet me? He doesn’t want to send a note or something?”

Ryo sighed, his breath crackling over the phone. “Phanuel said that he likes working together with his coworkers. Talking helps his creativity start to flow much easier. A people person, he called himself.”

“What about a fill-in actor?”

“No one has your writing skills, I’m afraid. Anyone can tell the difference between a pro and Andrew Homer. Homer does it better.”

The writer fiddled with his glasses, pushing them up with shaking hands. “Ryo, we can’t do something like this. You know that better than anyone else.”

“I know, I really do. It’s just… I know how you hate disappointing people. Especially your clients. I told him I would discuss it with you, but it was likely that such an arrangement wasn’t possible. Phanuel said that composing the song would be impossible otherwise.”

Androkles rubbed his temple, attempting to sooth the headache spawning itself from frustration. This was the first time anyone had ever requested to be face to face with him. He’d heard that some ghostwriters meet with their clients to discuss the future of the project, but he was lucky that no such request had been asked of him in the long years he’d been a writer. He really wanted to keep himself a secret. But if there was anything he valued more than his identity, it was having a satisfied client.

“Would it be possible…” he spoke softly, “for Phanuel to come here and for me to wear a disguise? Or stand in a separate room and talk to him from there?”

“...you’re actually going through with this?”

“Of course. I’m not letting down anyone who wants to work with me. Especially someone who just started his career.” He tried to say it with confidence, but the shakiness of his words betrayed him. “Besides, it doesn’t take me a very long time to write songs. I could probably finish it in a few days, given that I take as minimal breaks as possible. Phanuel will be out quickly.” He wasn’t going to mention that he had writer’s block at the moment.

There was a static-filled huff over the receiver. “Alright. As your agent, I’ll support your decision to do this. But as your friend—” Ryo stressed the word heavily, “I don’t know if I like your choice. It’s just… your situation and all.”

“Ryo,” he murmured. “I’ll be fine. I manage to get the groceries without anyone suspecting a thing, right? I’m sure I can handle a few days of talking to a customer.”

“I just want you to stay safe, that’s all.”

“I’ll take every precaution. I’ll even wear that mask you gave me. The one with the bear face on it? It’s right here.” Androkles reached out to the side table cluttered with notebooks, pulling a white mask toward him. He wrapped the strings around his ears and inhaled through his nostrils. “Mhmm, it still smells like the hot chocolate you spilled on it.”

“That was an accident.” He could hear the smirk in his voice. “Okay, if you're really confident about this, I’ll call him after I get the paperwork done. But remember, stay safe, okay? And if you want, wear the mask.”

Androkles nodded to no one in particular. “I will.”

“Alright then. I’ll update you on Phanuel when I get an answer.”

Just like that, Ryo hung up, ending the call with a beep. Androkles removed the phone from his ear. He was trembling.

The writer got up from the russet couch and walked into the kitchen, pulling open the drawer to get a cup so he could shock the nerves out of him with a glass of extremely bitter coffee. He grabbed a porcelain white cup, grasping the smooth handle with his fingers. Androkles was fumbling to open the coffee maker, his shaking hands making it difficult to place anything down.

Was this guy— Phanuel— actually willing to meet up with a ghostwriter when it was old knowledge that you could exchange a few emails with them and receive a song in a matter of weeks? Moreso, why would he ask Androkles for a song when he was already skilled?

Through all of this mental turmoil, Androkles didn’t notice the mug was phasing through his hand. Finally, it slipped through and shattered on the tile floor, making a loud crash. He was shocked. Uncontrollable transparency only happened when he was extremely nervous.

He sighed audibly, walking over to the corner to grab a broom and a dustpan to clean up the mess. He floated over, picking up his feet to avoid cutting them.

It was hard to be a famous ghost writer sometimes. Especially when you’re an actual ghost.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

ONE IS A THOUSAND

DEDICATION

This play is dedicated to my friend, who, after reading such a play, will know that despite end dates, he will still have an identity to me.

STORY OF THE PLAY

Clark lives in a world where the date of someone’s death is shown in bold letters above their head, although you cannot see your own. He is a man who has anxiously watched dates approach and has seen many people succumb to mortality, but despite all of this, Clark wants nothing more than to find who he is and live life in a society that tells him the numbers over his head are the only things that distinguish him as an individual.

One is a Thousand tells the tale of Clark’s identity to his loved ones after his death. A million dead is a statistic, but one tragedy can be the sorrow for a thousand.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Today was the day.

Androkles was running around his room, emptying his closet and heaving stacks of coats onto his bed. He lifted them, observing how much skin they would cover if he wore it before throwing it onto the floor behind him. None of them were perfect. They either exposed his neck too much or made him look like a junkie. The brown trench coat he usually wore outside was acting as a makeshift bed to Andrew, who refused to get off the comfy coat despite Androkles's pleading. Clothes were scattered everywhere, thick sweaters hanging off the armrests of chairs, the shoe rack overturned for tall boots, and twisted scarves resting on his work desk. He still needed to find gloves.

“Woah, what happened in here?” Ryo asked, sticking his head into Androkles's bedroom doorway. There was a spark of amusement in the eyes that were scanning the clothes strewn across the furniture.

The writer was visibly startled by his friend’s appearance, yelping before phasing through the floorboards. His head popped up from the ground.

Ryo extended a hand to him and the ghost took it, floating out from the basement and back into the bedroom. “Are you okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost or something.”

Androkles shot a hard glare at him before grabbing the nearest piece of cloth and whipping it at his friend. Ryo shrieked, retreating back into the living room.

“Hey! Don’t throw things at me!” A fountain pen flew at Ryo, the nib stabbing his cheek harshly, leaving a large ink stain the color of his hair staining his face. He threw up his hands as he backed away. “Okay, I surrender! See, look, I have my hands up. Androkles, I’m waving the white flag now, stop throwing things at me. Andro—Androkles, no. Put the typewriter down. I’m not ending up in the hospital because you gave me a concussion.”

Androkles's eye twitched, his lips contorting into a maniacal smirk. He lifted the typewriter higher. “You wanna bet?”

“No, I don’t wanna bet on anything, because there are only two outcomes to this. One leads to me being confined to a hospital bed. Put it down.”

He raised an eyebrow.

“Now.”

The ghost lowered the machine, sighing. “Fine, I will. But only because a client is coming over in a few hours and I’d rather not explain why there’s an unconscious man in my living room. Now come over here, I need your opinion on this coat.”

His friend had a wave of relief wash over his face. The war was finally over. “Sure. No chucking things at me, though.”

Androkles rolled his eyes, He held up the coat by its shoulders, presenting it to the raven-haired male who strode up next to him. “It covers my wrists, but it leaves my neck exposed. If I really want to wear it, I’d have to put on that sweater over there. But that still leaves a giant space under my jaw. The mask could cover it up, but there’s a chance it could slip off and reveal my whole face. What do you think I should do?”

Ryo hummed in thought, closing his eyes and putting a hand to his jaw as if deep in thought. After a silent 10 seconds, his dark eyes lit up and he had a devious expression, grinning as if he’d found the cure to a disease. Then, he walked over to Androkles's work desk, where scarves were hiding his drafts and fluffy pens underneath. His friend took a brightly colored cloth in his hand, showing it to a confused Androkles.

“I have just the solution for you.”

All of a sudden, Androkles felt even more anxious.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

ONE IS A THOUSAND

SCENE 1: I QUESTIONED

(AT RISE: FATHER is sitting in the house, reading the newspaper on the couch. It is lively and children’s toys are scattered everywhere. A crayon drawing of a nuclear family hangs on the wall. CLARK’s death date is marked on the calendar, followed with the date in the future.)

(There is the sound of a door opening. A child CLARK runs in from offstage and drops his backpack, rushing to jump into his father’s arms.)

CLARK

Dad!

DAD

There’s my little champ. How was school today?

CLARK

It was so fun! We made rainbow toast and painted our favorite animals. Do you wanna see mine?

DAD

Of course I do.

(CLARK runs to get his backpack and pulls out a drawing of a badly painted bird. He gives it to DAD, who breaks out into a giant grin.)

DAD

This is amazing, Clark. The bird looks so real. You could become an artist if you wanted to. But my memory’s a bit fuzzy… can you remind me what animal this is?

CLARK

It’s a puffin!

(DAD pulls CLARK onto his lap.)

DAD

A puffin? Where did you see one?

CLARK

It was in one of the books the teacher always reads to us! Puffins are so cute. I think they’re my favorite animal now.

DAD

Did you hear that, honey? Our son loves puffins!

(MOM is heard laughing off-stage.)

CLARK

Hey Dad, there’s something else I wanted to talk to you about.

DAD

What is it?

(CLARK points to the numbers above his dad’s head, which are dated to be a decade before his son’s.)

CLARK

What are these things?

DAD

(expression darkening) Why do you… want to know?

CLARK

Well… everyone has them, but no one talks about it. They’re just kind of there. And Suzy had one that was dated for today. She didn’t come to school today and the teacher was very sad. Are they vacation days?

DAD

(hesitating) Not… exactly. See son, when the date of the numbers finally arrives, those people get to go somewhere. It’s a place far away, farther than their loved ones can reach them. Their vacation lasts a very long time. But after a while… we get to visit those people on their relaxing vacations.

CLARK

Are they at the beach?

DAD

It can be wherever they want, as long as they love that place.

CLARK

Then I’m going to go to my bedroom when my date arrives! I love my bedroom. It has all of my toys. Are you going to visit me when that happens?

DAD

...I am. Wait, is that Will I see out there? Why don’t you go play with him?

CLARK

Okay! Will!

(CLARK runs offstage. Mother walks onstage a few moments later.)

MOM

I heard your conversation.

DAD

I was hoping you would.

MOM

Is it really… necessary for children to know about the dates? Can’t they wait just a bit longer?

DAD

They’ll have to know about it sooner or later. I just wish we had more time…

(MOM sits down next to DAD. They lean on each other.)

MOM

...26 is a young age to die, isn’t it?

DAD

It is.

MOM

I wish he had more time. I wish I didn’t have to watch my son die.

DAD

Shhhh, don’t say that. Let’s just enjoy the time we have together.

(Freeze frame. Adult CLARK walks on stage.)

CLARK

I didn’t know the reality I was told that day. That a vacation which became permanent for someone wasn’t willing. That day… after Will told me Suzy had drowned in the river next to her house after trying to get her beloved stuffed dog back from the water… I realized… what death dates were.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

He should have never listened to Ryo.

An image in the mirror reflected back at him, and he wasn’t quite sure it was even him under all the layers of clothing. A large winter hat covered his head, the sides falling over his ears (which were growing red from embarrassment). On his body was an oversized street style coat that stopped at his ankles, covering most of the turtleneck he had on. Black jeans were stuffed into combat boots (he didn’t wear shoes in his house, but it was all for the sake of his image). The bright scarf that was previously in Ryo’s hands was now draped loosely around Androkles's neck, covering the skin that the bear mask failed to conceal. The only thing left to cover was the transparent skin of the midsection of his face.

“And the final part of my plan are these,” Ryo announced, reaching into his pocket. He pulled out a large pair of dark sunglasses, handing them to Androkles. He slipped them on, and the bright light filling the room seemed to dim immensely, leaving him disoriented for a second. Ryo grabbed him by the shoulders, cocking his head toward the reflection.

“Well?” he asked.

“I look like I’m ready to battle the blizzard of 1888,” Androkles admitted. It wasn’t hot under the bundle of clothing (temperature didn’t affect him), but it certainly felt uncomfortable.

“That means we got you all covered up. No transparent skin revealed at all. Another perfect plan of mine.” Ryo adjusted the scarf, pulling it up more. “Phanuel will be over in an hour. I told him about the secrecy of this meeting because as it goes for all ghostwriters, you don’t want your identity to be known. He said that he’ll promise to not let any information get out there, so don’t you worry about anything. Everything’s going to be okay. Your hands don’t need to tremble anymore.”

Androkles didn’t notice his limbs were shaking. Ryo held him in a comforting embrace, and he let the easy familiarity calm his nerves. His friend pulled away from him and sighed. “I have to go now. It’s busy work, being the agent and editor for the world’s biggest author and all.” Suddenly, Ryo’s gaze grew dark. “But before I go, I just need to remind you to do something…”

Androkles gulped. “What is that?”

Ryo kept his solemn face as he glared at the writer. “Remember to stay super neutral.”

The man ran out of the house before Androkles could get his hands on the typewriter.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

ONE IS A THOUSAND

SCENE 3: THERE’S SOMETHING MORE

(AT RISE: Adult CLARK and WILL are at a post office. It is relatively quiet, with the exception of the ticking of a clock in the background. Workers are standing behind desks, chatting with each other as they wait for customers. A large mailbox stands center stage, facing out to the audience.)

(CLARK dumps a load of letters into the mailbox.)

WILL

What are they for?

CLARK

They’re letters for the people who might miss us when we’re traveling the world! Of course, we’ll write while we’re overseas, but we can’t just leave without telling anyone. That would be heartbreaking.

(CLARK starts to pull out more letters.)

(cont.) See, I have one for everyone. The boss at work, our co-workers, the nice lady who always gives us extra bread at the bakery… They’re all getting one! Look, even your mom’s getting a letter!

WILL

Was it really necessary to write all of those letters? Half of those people probably don’t even care about what you’re doing in your life. I mean, my mom probably does, but that’s because she has a personal connection to you.

CLARK

Everyone has a personal connection to me. It may not seem like it, but every stranger you’ve ever met has made an impression on you, even if you’ve glanced at them for only a second. Besides, I see these people on a daily basis. Getting a letter sent to them isn’t going to hurt. We just have different interpretations of each other. Now help me get these letters in, they’re falling out.

(CLARK and WILL gather the letters that have fallen out of his pockets. They put them in the mailbox.)

WILL

Is that all of them?

CLARK

… no. I have more at home, but I couldn’t fit them in my pockets.

(WILL sighs.)

WILL

Let’s go get them then. I’ll grab a few so that you don’t have to carry so much.

CLARK

You’d really do that for me?

WILL

Of course. You’re the one that’s paying rent.

CLARK

Very funny. I’m going to ask someone when these letters will arrive. I don’t want them to arrive after we’ve been gone for too long.

(CLARK runs off stage. A worker from behind the desk calls out to WILL.)

WORKER

Are you friends with that guy?

WILL

Roommates.

WORKER

I see. Are you aware that it’ll probably take more than a week to deliver that giant stack of letters? The big city isn’t exactly an easy place to deliver letters.

WILL

I am.

WORKER

You wanna break it to your friend that those letters might not be delivered while he’s still alive? Or do you want me to do it?

(The room freezes.)

WILL

I’d rather be the one to do it.

WORKER

Good. Spend your time wisely, kid.

(CLARK runs on stage with a smile stretched across his face. He embraces WILL.)

CLARK

They said that they could send all of the letters in a week or so! Everyone will receive something right after we leave. Although, those people were looking at me weirdly. But that doesn’t matter now. What matters is that we’ve got the world ahead of us, Will. Now come on, we’ve got more letters to get!

(They run off stage hand in hand.)

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

There were only 5 minutes remaining before he would hear those fated knocks.

Androkles was quaking. He checked himself in the mirror at least 50 times in the past half hour, frantically searching again and again for any skin that was showing. With the exception of the little dots of olive skin not covered by the sunglasses, everything had remained the same as the time of Ryo’s departure. He sighed heavily, feeling anxiety rise in his chest.

Wait, he had to talk, didn’t he? This wasn’t just a chain of emails with no voice to assign the words to. He had an actual voice. One that Phanuel would hear.

The ghost was about to start screaming.

A soft mass brushed up against his leg, startling him out of his thoughts. Androkles looked down to find that his cat was stepping on his boot as if he knew it would temporarily break the toxic cycle of anxiety. He looked at Andrew fondly, bending down to pick him up and cradle him in his arms.

Andrew was a stray Androkles had stumbled upon at the beginning of his career. It was a rainy night in a dark alley, and being the person he is, the man couldn’t ignore the soft purring coming from a cardboard box. He opened the lid to find a starving kitten lying inside, not bothering to look at Androkles. It just stared at the corner unmoving. He took it to the vet, waiting for news to come back about the kitten.

1 hour. It was the longest he had ever spent outside and it was for Andrew.

Now it was time for a significant upgrade: 4 hours every day for less than a week spent with a stranger that he had to write songs for. The anxiety of having to veil his ghostly origins came back to him again. Androkles buried his face in the cat’s black fur, causing Andrew to purr contently.

There was no way he was going to get through this.

Knock, knock, knock.

Androkles's movements came to a halt. A silence followed the quiet rapping, hanging in the air like mist.

Time froze. A paused moment suffocated Androkles, and Andrew was kneading his hand. It was comparable to the second of thinking before replying to a well-thought-out question, or the still atmosphere of a picture of a family at an amusement park being taken by a stranger.

Androkles was experiencing one of those moments, and his heart was starting to race.

The knocks resounded from the door again. Androkles panicked, placing the midnight cat down before checking himself in the mirror once more. He adjusted his scarf, the thick, leathery gloves restraining his movements a bit. He took a breath, smacking himself mentally to gather his thoughts. Androkles looked at himself with a determined expression.

Come on, you can do this. It’s only a few days. Answer the door.

Forcing his limbs to move, he opened the bedroom door and approached the oak door. The average-sized entrance suddenly seemed to be looming over him as if it were an obstacle. His shaking hands grasped the bronze doorknob.

I can do this. I can do this. Everything will turn out to be fine and my identity will be hidden.

Androkles's wrist refused to turn the knob.

No I can’t, this was a stupid idea. Why did I agree to this? I don’t have the skill to be sly. The client is going to find out I’m a ghost and it’s all going to be over. Oh no, oh no, what do I do…?

A soft pat on his left foot made him look down. Andrew was kneading at his foot, meowing loudly. The feline looked at him with a blank expression.

Androkles grinned. “You’re right, Andrew. It’s just one person. I can stop being afraid.”

He unlocked the door, pulling it open and letting sunlight flood into the room, allowing Andrew to slip outside. The dark environment around him brightened, and if it weren’t for the sunglasses, Androkles would be rendered to a blind mess.

Through the tinted lens, he saw a boy. Actually, rather than a child, it was a man about Androkles's age in appearance, though his soft face gave him a youthful charm. The man was an inch taller than the writer, and his jaw was strong and defined. His skin was a caramel, and his hair was a dark brown, leaning closer to black than a milk chocolate. A guitar case was secured onto his back, the black strap digging into the light blue cardigan he had on.

Androkles stared for a bit, taking in the man’s confident stature. He had a fist raised, almost as if he was about to start knocking on the door once more.

Phanuel lowered his arm. He cleared his throat. “Hello there. Is this the household of Andrew Homer?”

The writer hesitated before speaking. “I-It is.”

“Oh.” Phanuel tilted his head to the side, causing curly brown locks to fall into starry eyes. “Are you… Andrew Homer, the writer?”

He nodded weakly, pointing to himself with his index finger. “That’s me. Are you Phanuel?”

Something in Phanuel’s eyes brightened, and suddenly, the man straightened his posture. He extended a hand. “Y-Yes, I’m Phanuel. I’m looking forward to working with you.”

Phanuel was blushing, and the hand held out for Androkles to take was shaking a little. Oh, so the guy, who was supposed to be a charismatic teen heartthrob was nervous in Androkles's presence. He couldn’t help but feel sympathy for the man standing in front of him. At least Androkles wasn’t the only one that was nervous. He took Phanuel’s hand and gave it a semi-confident shake. “The same as well. Here, come inside. We can start working on the song in my living room.

At that, some of the tightness in Phanuel’s jaw disappeared. The dark-haired male nodded, and Androkles moved aside to let him in before locking the door. They walked to the table in the middle of the room in relative silence before sitting down at the opposite ends.

Phanuel spoke up. “Aren’t you… hot in all of those clothes?”

Androkles shrunk into his scarf. “I-I get cold easily.”

The air around them was awkward. It was the type of atmosphere that came when you were left alone with the friend of a friend, unwilling to talk without the thread connecting you two filling in the gaps in the conversation, but forcing yourself to so you don’t sit in silence. It was to be expected. After all, they were strangers to each other, only meeting up for the sake of work. Androkles didn’t know how Ryo could deal with this type of unsettling quietness.

“I have to apologize, I don’t usually have guests over,” Androkles said sheepishly as he cleared the papers and scattered pens off the table. He walked over to the cabinet, searching for some blank sheet music. He suddenly remembered how Ryo dealt with meeting new people, as being in an industry meant you had to make lots of connections. “S-So, Phanuel. Tell me a bit about yourself.”

If there was any previous tension between them, Phanuel seemed to have forgotten, because his words had an easy flow to them. “Well, I’m a musician, but you already know that part. I play the guitar, and I’m allergic to pollen.”

Androkles nodded, hoping that Phanuel saw it. He bent down to check for a pencil, having already found a stack of paper. “Really? How about your likes and dislikes?”

“Ah, uh…” The man hummed in thought. “I really like peach flavored candy. Specifically peach-mango lollipops, those are delicious. But the coffee flavored ones, they don’t really appeal to me. They try to be caramel and chocolate at the same time, but they’re only trying.” The writer, although faced away from Phanuel, could almost feel him making hand gestures to his speech. “I also hate wet socks. It’s my belief that they’re sent directly from the fiery pits of the underworld to torture my feet.”

Androkles held back a laugh. “Oh really? How exactly do they torture your feet?”

“It’s how the water just sticks to your feet and you can’t wipe it off because it’s the cloth that’s wet. The socks get soggy and the part in the front starts to droop down and cling to the sides of your toes. It’s cold and unpleasant. Then you have to take it off and but the spot the water got onto is still moist and…” Phanuel shuddered. “Just...no.”

The writer was struggling to keep down his giggles. Anyone would agree with that. “Favorite song?”

“Mmhm, probably ‘Love Lies’ by Khalid and Normani.”

“Favorite genre of music?”

“Surprisingly, classical.”

“Favorite color?”

“Blue.”

“Pineapples on pizza or plain?”

“Are you kidding?” Phanuel leaned back in the chair, causing it to creak quietly. “Pineapples on pizza. Plain pizza is bland.”

Androkles gasped, turning around to face his guest. “What you say is delicious is an invention made by the devil. I will not stand for anyone liking pineapples on pizza in this household.”

Phanuel laughed loudly. “And I’m sure you’re very happy with extremely plain pizza.”

The ghost rolled his eyes, blushing slightly. “Favorite novel?”

Now it was Phanuel’s turn to turn red. He dipped his pink dusted head down, staring at his hands. “U-Uh, Perhaps in Death. Your novel.”

Androkles almost dropped his papers right there. He was frozen to his spot. Perhaps in Death was one of his earliest novels, but it was still successful and managed to get a movie adaption. It was the story of a girl making a contract with a demon to find the murderer of her sister. It had been a long time since someone mentioned it since the work that took the limelight was One is a Thousand. “T-That’s your favorite story?”

“Yeah, it is. Don’t get me wrong, I love One is a Thousand, it’s just…” Phanuel struggled to find the right words. “I don’t know. I think there’s something very powerful about people making promises. ‘We’ll meet again, I promise, but perhaps it will be in death.’ I think that’s such a great line, don’t you think?”

The writer flushed deeply, pulling up the scarf covering his neck. “Y-Yeah, I guess it is.”

Androkles sat down at the table, passing some paper and a pencil to Phanuel. “So, do you have any ideas for the song?”

“...no, actually,” Phanuel admitted. “I’m going through some… musician’s block. I know I really shouldn’t force myself to compose any songs at the moment, but there’s a song that’s just waiting to be written. I just don’t know how to execute it. That’s why I wanted to hire you to help me write the song.”

Ah, so there was the problem. Once again, there was a similarity between them, but this time it was one that might hinder their work. “Okay, let’s start with the basics. What story do you want to tell? Maybe something current?”

Phanuel looked to be deep in thought. He rested his head on top of his hands. “How about… finding inspiration after a long period of nothing? I really can’t think of anything other than overcoming a creative block at the moment. You know, like when it rains after a long period of no water? And then it smells really nice outside?”

Androkles blinked. “Petrichor?”

The musician’s eyes widened by a fraction. “There’s a word for it?” He nodded, and Phanuel’s eyes looked like they were about to fall out of his head. “It sounds so… serene. I like it.”

It was. There was a tinkling of notes resounding from the back of his mind, and Androkles knew he had to compose it now. “Take out your guitar. I think I have an idea.”

Phanuel nodded his head, moving to open the black case that was currently lying on the ground unopened. With a few clicks, it was unlocked, and Phanuel pulled out a sand-colored acoustic guitar. Androkles didn’t know how to play the instrument, having only mastered the piano and violin, so he figured he would let the musician strum all of the chords for him.

“Play… D Flat Major 7.”

Phanuel adjusted his hands on the neck, barring one of the frets with his first finger before strumming. The guitar made a rich sound, the chord resonating in the wooden body. It sounded perfect.

“Alright, now play E Diminished, then C Minor 7, and then A Flat.”

Phanuel obeyed, playing the chords Androkles was stating. He shook his head, asking the man to switch the last two chords in the progression. He made a sound of agreement and played the chords in order. They both looked at each other.

“That sounded... really nice,” Phanuel said, wonder in his eyes.

Androkles was furiously writing down the notes. This was working. “It does.”

Just as he was about to give more directions to Phanuel, a loud purring from behind him erupted. The two of them were startled, and Phanuel cocked his head to the side, looking past Androkles to see where the sound came from. He lifted a caramel finger to Andrew, who was meowing softly.

“Is your cat supposed to be on top of that bookshelf?”

Androkles whipped his head around, almost causing the winter hat to fall off. His eyes landed on Andrew, who was inching his way across the top of a tall spruce bookshelf with a dead mouse in between his fangs. The shelf he was standing on was stuffed with books, some of them his own and others from authors he occasionally read from. It was old and therefore weak, and the paint was starting to scrape off. The second thing he noticed was the lack of empty spaces on the various shelves. He would have to get a new bookcase sooner or later.

The first? The bookcase was wobbling forward.

“Andrew! Get down from there!” Androkles shouted as he bolted out of his chair, running toward the teetering spruce shelf in record speed. Phanuel followed, and as soon as they were halfway across the living room, the shelf tipped over, causing Andrew to let out a hiss and jump.

The two of them extended their hands, waiting to catch the feline. Androkles watched as Andrew fell into an arch directly into Phanuel’s arms, causing him to dip his body. He let out a sigh. But Androkles was starting to shout something at him.

“Andrew, watch out—!”

Androkles turned around and a shadow was looming over him. The assortment of brightly colored novels flew at him, blinding him from the shelf that was about to collapse on top of him. He let himself grow intangible, and he fell through the floorboards, avoiding the bookcase that landed with a loud bang.

“Andr—Andrew! Oh my god!” He could hear Phanuel scramble to move the piece of furniture. “Andrew, if you can hear me, I’m going to call the police to help me get you out of there! Please respond if you’re under there!”

“No, I’m okay!” Androkles flew through the floor, reappearing in the living room. He ran to Phanuel and grabbed him by the shoulders. “I’m okay! I’m right here, see?”

Phanuel’s jaw dropped, shocked. “Andrew…?”

“I’m not under the bookshelf! See, I’m uncrushed and… right in front of you…”

Androkles took a step back from Phanuel, retracting his hands as if contact burned his palms. He was sure that he was wearing the same stunned face as the man except 10 times worse. The writer looked down at his hands.

They were transparent.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

ONE IS A THOUSAND

SCENE 5: THE ACT OF SUNRISE

(AT RISE: CLARK and WILL walk upstage together, arms wrapped around each other’s shoulders as they share raucous, hearty laughs with each other. Their business clothes are untidy and neckties loosened, as the alcohol has made them unrestrained, rendering them to stumbling drunks, constantly tripping over their own feet. The looming apartments of the city surround them, shrouding them in shadow and distancing themselves from the noisy bustle of city life. A sunrise is peeking over the horizon.)

CLARK

(laughing) You should have seen the way you threw that punch at that guy when he was poking fun at me! Your face just got all red and taut, then out of nowhere, a fist comes flying and a guy is on the floor. It’s a shame we got kicked out, we only got to celebrate for an hour. But I don’t think the poor guy really deserved that.

WILL

Oh, he did.

CLARK

Look, drama can be fun sometimes, but you shouldn’t resort to violence when you get angry. You could’ve offered the guy a drink instead of a punch… but the past is behind us. We’ve got plane tickets, and next week, we’ll be traveling the world! I can almost feel what it’s going to be like in other countries. The hot springs of Switzerland, the Galleria dell'Accademia di Firenze in Florence, the cherry blossoms in Japan… they’re calling for the both of us to explore them. Aren’t you so excited?

WILL

I am, to be traveling the continents with my best friend. I’m hoping we won’t lose each other in the crowds.

CLARK

We won’t. You always keep a tight leash on me. Remember how I wandered off in the aquarium during a field trip and you were the only one that could find me?

WILL

You could never stay away from the puffins.

CLARK

And I will continue to run after them on our trip to Iceland. Now sit down with me. If I keep walking like this I’ll throw up on my loafers.

(They collapse onto the sidewalk, chuckling. They lean on a lamppost, sitting with content smiles. The sun starts to rise in the distance.)

WILL

You know, Clark, I don’t usually say things like this but… I’m glad you’re my best friend.

CLARK

Oh? What’s this all about? Are you going through the sentimental phase of the alcohol?

WILL

I think I am.

(CLARK grows quiet. He stares at WILL.)

(cont.) Sometimes I think about what it would be like if I hadn’t met you. How different would my life be? Would I be a completely disparate person to how I am today? I don’t know. But I know one thing’s for certain. You made everything better for me just by existing. These emotions… they’re hard to put in words. But I think the only thing I can say is ‘thank you.’ I’m so glad I met you.

(CLARK pauses before laughing. He smacks WILL on the shoulder.)

CLARK

Oh, Will, you’re so funny at times. I suddenly have a philosopher as a friend. But I can’t deny that I feel the same, too. But you act like we’re going to part ways or something. That’s not gonna happen. You’re my best friend for life.

(WILL glances sadly at the date over CLARK’S head. His friend is scheduled to die in 6 days. The sun starts to rise. Lights slowly become brighter.)

WILL

… the same for you, Clark.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Androkles stared at his wall unmoving. Andrew crawled under his arm, trying to get him to open a can of cat food for him, but he felt too numb to get up.

After he revealed himself to Phanuel, he nearly shrieked, running over to grab the guitar and its case before shoving the musician out with his instrument. Androkles slammed the door on Phanuel’s protests before dashing to his blankets and crying under them. He was sure Phanuel stayed at the front door for nearly an hour, realizing that it was a fruitless endeavor once it started to rain outside. The sound of heavy footsteps walking down the porch’s steps gave Androkles some peace of mind before the reality hit him once more.

Was Phanuel going to reveal his identity to the world? Was the rising star going to hop on social media and post a long message including the details of his visit, explaining how Androkles flew through the wooden floor after a bookcase fell on top of him? All of this drowned Androkles into the fantods, and he started crying even harder.

He had multiple missed calls on his cellphone, all from Ryo. They were all probably about his ghostly origins being revealed by teen heartthrob Phanuel, so he didn’t bother to pick up. He didn’t want to hear those words anyway.

Androkles fell backward onto his bed, groaning loudly. The feline crawled on top of his chest and curled into himself, resting his soft body on top of Androkles's. Everything was going fine until Andrew crawled on top of the bookcase and knocked it over. Of all days, why did the shelf have to fall down the day of a visit?

He was never going to write another novel ever again.

The clock struck 2:30, the time Phanuel was supposed to come and work on the song. Tears burned at Androkles's already raw eyes. He knew his client wouldn’t come back after the disaster that was yesterday. Even if Phanuel didn’t care about the fallen bookcase (which was still on the floor after having been toppled over), would anyone want to work with a ghost?

Knock, knock, knock.

Androkles shot upward, causing Andrew to fall off his chest and earn himself a hiss from the feline. His heart began to pound in his ears.

“Andrew?”

Phanuel’s voice was muffled behind the wooden door, He knocked the door a few more times, and Androkles pulled the fluffy blanket over his head. He just wanted Phanuel to go away, to just tell him he revealed his identity to the world and leave his front porch with the strawberry plant alone. But the musician kept rapping on the door with his knuckles after a few silent moments with no reply.

“Andrew, I just wanted to let you know… I didn’t tell anyone. About your, uh, form.”

Androkles huffed. That was a lie.

“If you don’t believe me, you can ask your agent. I called him after all of that happened yesterday because I wanted to know if you were alright. I figured he knew because he kept emphasizing the importance of the secrecy and made me read the contract at least 6 times. I just didn’t know… it would be something like this.”

No one would. But he was thankful that Ryo had him bound to a contract before he told anyone about him being a ghost.

“Not that I’m disappointed in what you truly are! It’s just… surprising, that’s all. I didn’t expect that my favorite author would… literally be a ghostwriter…”

Androkles walked up to the door in his fluffy mint slippers, which were partly stained after he spilled paint to them. After the soft padding of his feet halted, he opened the front entrance and sighed heavily. He was met with the sight of a mossy haired Phanuel, whose eyes were blown wide open at Androkles's appearance.

“What do you want, Phanuel?” he asked in a jaded voice.

Phanuel reached out to Androkles's face, attempting to wipe the tears streaming down his face. “You’ve been… crying…” Once his fingers met with Androkles's cheeks, his hand went through his face, and he pulled back, startled.

Androkles rolled his eyes. “Come inside. I need to discuss this… situation with you.”

Phanuel nodded, and just like yesterday, he stepped past Androkles to enter the house, heading towards the middle of the living room. Androkles closed the door and locked it, double checking if there was anyone outside that saw Phanuel walk in. He shut the curtains, walking back to the room with the fallen shelf in it.

“Sit down on the couch,” Androkles said. Phanuel obeyed, placing himself on the russet couch resting beside the glass coffee table. He fiddled with his thumbs as Androkles sat on the opposite end of the couch.

“So… what do you want to talk about with me?”

“Well, let’s start with the obvious,” he replied. Androkles rubbed his forehead. “Please don’t tell anyone about me. I’d rather not be exposed on the front page of every news portal with headlines saying ‘Andrew Homer, an actual ghostwriter?!’ I want to be able to go outside without having paparazzi stalking my every move and gossip magazines spreading rumors about the type of salad I eat. I’m not really a public person. And then there are… pretty straightforward reasons.”

Phanuel scanned his body, looking at the transparency of his face and hands. “Yeah, I understand.”

“I’m not a… people person like you. Having millions of people know about my life makes me really uncomfortable. Everyone deserves some privacy, even the most famous author of the 21st century, right?” The musician nodded. “So please, I’m begging you to not say a word about me. And if you already have… well, I guess I can’t really stop you from doing so.”

He shook his head. “No, I would never do that. It’s wrong to just give away information about a person’s lifestyle. I don’t really care if you’re a ghost. You’re a nice person to be around. You aren’t just trying to use people for their fame.” At this Phanuel’s eyes glossed over and he looked away. Androkles wondered what the story behind his words was. “But I have one request from you. Not as Phanuel, but as your client.”

“Go on.”

“Can we…” A slight blush spread onto Phanuel’s face as he struggled to find the words. “... keep working on the song, even though I know about all of this? I know it’s really selfish of me to ask since you don’t really want to have anyone around when you’re not hidden, but I—”

“Okay then.”

Phanuel looked up. “Wait, really?”

Androkles smiled weakly at him. ‘As much as I want to keep my identity hidden, I don’t want to leave any unsatisfied clients. I’d be happy to write your song.”

The man’s eyes lit up, like yesterday, when Androkles acknowledged him at the front door. Phanuel went to hug Androkles. “Thank you so much—!” His arms went through the ghost’s intangible body and he blushed. “U-Uh, oops. I keep forgetting about that. Sorry.”

The writer snorted.

“Wait, you laughed! Does this tickle?” Phanuel stuck his hand into Androkles's arm and he snickered. The musician went to fix a lock of light brown hair that was sticking up, but his hand went through the strands. Androkles laughed even harder. His tear sore cheeks were hurting from smiling.

“Phanuel, stop that—”

Androkles leaned forward to lower Phanuel’s hand, but instead, his palm went directly through his head, landing in the area where there should have been a brain in place of nothing. Phanuel screamed, pulling his hand back as if the ghost had hit him. Androkles was cackling, bending over because his stomach hurt.

The musician stared at the ghost who was doubling over in laughter. Then, he started to laugh too, and pretty soon, the living room was filled with the sound of giggling and rasps for breath. Every time silence replaced the happiness in the room, one of them would start laughing again, causing the other to follow. It was a circle of never-ending chortling.

“So does that mean,” Phanuel asked while wiping the tears in the corner of his eyes, “you’ll really continue to write the song with me?”

“Of course, I already said that. But promise me you won’t stick your hand in my skull again.”

“I can’t promise that, Andrew.”

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

SCENE 8: FAMILIAL FORGIVENESS

(AT RISE: MOM is sitting in a wooden rocking chair inside. She is looking through albums of her son and her having fun in his childhood. The radio is on a low volume in the background. The house is nicely decorated, and a table with flowers sits downstage, and two plates are sitting out on top of it. The house is full of empty picture frames. In the background, there is a calendar with CLARK’S death date marked on it.)

(MOM sighs and closes the album with a forlorn expression. CLARK knocks on the door and she’s visibly shaken. She doesn’t get up to answer it.)

CLARK

Hello? Is anyone home?

(MOM doesn’t answer.)

(cont.) I was hoping… that someone would be in here. I need to tell you what’s been going on my life. I wanted to get some approval. It feels wrong pursuing my dreams without getting permission from my family.

(MOM nods. CLARK sighs.)

(cont.) Mom, I know we’re not on good terms, but please let me in.

(MOM sighs heavily and gets up, walking slowly to the entrance. WILL’s face lights up as she stares at him with a steely expression.)

MOM

What did you come here for, Clark?

CLARK

I wanted to talk about how my life’s been going. I know you don’t want to see my face after I said I was in love with my best friend but… will you let me into our house one last time?

(MOM crosses her arms and looks away.)

MOM

One last time. Then you vanish from this household. I’ll go get some tea.

CLARK

Thank you so much.

(He walks into the house while she puts a kettle on the stove. CLARK sits down on the couch while MOM stands from a distance. The air is tense around them.)

MOM

So… what did you want to tell me?

CLARK

First I wanted to say… I’m sorry for being such a bad son. And I know that being gone for 15 years isn’t going to make forgiving me easier, but I’ve come here to ask… if you’ll accept the actions I’ll take in the future.

MOM

It depends on what they are, Clark.

(CLARK is smiles. His MOM is finally willing to listen to him.)

CLARK

I’m… going to travel the world with Will. In Florence, I’m planning on telling him how I feel. How I’ve cherished every year I’ve spent with him. And even if he rejects me, it’s still an opportunity I can’t let slip away. Life’s too short to not do so, right?

(She glances at the date on top of his head.)

MOM

It really is.

CLARK

Then after I come back with experiences under my belt, I plan on writing a book about them. Then hopefully, I’ll inspire someone to live a full life. Sure, they may not want to trek through rainforests and swim through rapids, but people will eventually find what they love right?

(He plays with his hands.)

(cont.) I want… to tell people that there are so many possibilities in the world. That they don’t have to be confined to the death dates floating above them. We can all live, despite knowing that there will be an end to our existences… do you support my dream, mom?

(Silence.)

MOM

I do.

WILL

And… do you forgive me for running away all of those years ago?

(She walks closer to him, hovering over him. Suddenly, she embraces him, tearing up.)

MOM

I don’t think I can. I don’t want to give you forgiveness for hurting me so much. But the thing that caused me the most pain was not knowing where you were or if you were crying. I’ve failed you as a mother…

CLARK

Don’t say that.

MOM

… but I’m glad you came back to me. I just wish we could’ve spent more time together. You don’t know how much I’m thankful for your return. Clark, I love you so much. My beloved son. My baby. You’re alive and you’re living.

CLARK

I love you, too, Mom.

(The two of them start to cry. In the kitchen, the kettle starts to whistle.)

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Androkles put his pen down and shook the tension out of his wrist. He heard his joints pop as he stretched his arms, and the man sitting across from him did the same. Looking at the time on the clock mounted on the wall, he internally sighed as the two hands displayed the time 5:56.

“We’ve been working for almost two hours straight,” Androkles announced. “Wanna take a break?”

“Sure,” Phanuel replied, placing the guitar back in the case. The instrument was actually donated to Androkles by Ryo, but he had no use for it. After all, he was a writer, not a musician, so it sat in the back of his closet gathering dust on top of the case. It proved to be useful, though, because in Phanuel’s rush to apologize to Androkles, he forgot to get his guitar.

“I’ll go get us some drinks. Is water fine with you?” Phanuel hummed in agreement, and the ghost walked to the kitchen, returning with two cups of cold water sloshing in his hands. He placed them on the table and Phanuel drank it, his Adam's apple bobbing before he wiped his lips and made a refreshed sound. Androkles took a few sips of his drink.

“So, I’ve been meaning to ask,” Phanuel said as he collected the sheets of work they got done, “is eating a necessity for you? I mean, I don’t know if you have a digestive system or…”

“It’s not. I eat for my own enjoyment. Everything a human needs, like sleep or bathing, I do just for the sake of having fun. Life would be kinda boring if I just floated around doing nothing when I could be eating ice cream, right?”

“Ah, I see what you mean. ‘I walk with life because I want to, not because I’m forcing myself to. Though there may be an end, that doesn’t deter me from writing my footsteps into the ground.’” Phanuel’s cheeks turned red, and he brought the glass to his face to hide his redness. “...From A Journey’s Manhunt. Johann’s line.”

Androkles covered his wide grin with his hand. It didn’t take long for him to realize that Phanuel was an avid reader of his. A Journey’s Manhunt wasn’t a recent novel, but still fairly relevant. It was a staple book in many high schools, and a company offered to do an audiobook on it a year after it came out. Androkles, of course, greenlit their decision to do so. He wondered if Phanuel read any of his less known books. “‘Of course, Johann, but why would you want to explore nature’s fortresses when you could stay with us, safe and happy in our bucolic village?’”

Phanuel shot an amused glance at him. “Of course I love our village. It’s warm with my mother and father in our home, and I love my younger brother. But this world lies in the bosom of Abraxas, and through that, I have the striking notion that traveling is meant to free us. The garden of the world is open to all horizons.’ That reminds me…” he pointed at the back door in the kitchen, which was covered in a straw-colored curtain. “Do you have a garden back there? When I came in the other day, I saw some plants through the window.”

The writer smiled. “Do you want to see?”

His eyes widened, so Androkles took that as a yes. He got up from his seat, and Phanuel followed him to the kitchen. His fingers wrapped around the knob and he pushed it open, presenting his backyard.

The yard was surrounded by a barrier of high maroon fences, preventing anyone from climbing up unless they leaned a ladder against it. But the main attraction of the large yard was the plants planted in neat rows. Flowers grew everywhere; tulips were bursting, violets littered the small spaces under the taller flowers, rose bushes were starting to bloom, and buttercups scattered the ground, creating tiny golden dots that seemed to make the garden sparkle. A cobblestone path snaked around the beds, allowing for safe passage. Phanuel gasped.

“Can we… go out there?”

“Sure. Just don’t step on the flowers.”

They walked out of the house, their shoes clacking off the stone path quietly. Phanuel’s jaw hung open as he bent down to observe the flowers, making little oohs and aahs as he explored the color-splashed garden.

Androkles watched him from behind, amused by this wonderstruck man prancing around in his garden. Phanuel pointed at the plants, looking at him.

“Did you plant all of these?”

“No, actually. Ry—my friend did. It was supposed to be a way to make me go outside more. But these plants don’t need to be taken care of. They grow on their own. I just come out here sometimes.”

“They’re beautiful.”

Androkles nodded. He was about to ask Phanuel if one of his hobbies was gardening when the sky rumbled lowly. It was a loud, thundering sound that came from above, causing the two of them to look up. The sky was covered in a blanket of dark grey clouds, blocking out the sun and causing the air to grow frigid. A raindrop fell on Phanuel’s cheek and he wiped it off.

“Oh yeah, I forgot it was supposed to rain this afternoon.” As Androkles said that, the light drizzle of water grew heavier, beginning to make a wet patch on Phanuel’s shoulders. The rain fell through Androkles's skin, phasing through his shirt as well. “Let’s go inside, you must be getting wet.” But Phanuel was still looking up at the sky. Androkles raised an eyebrow. “Phanuel?”

“Not yet. Let’s stay outside for a bit.”

He grabbed the musician’s wrist, attempting to pull him inside. Phanuel’s dark locks were already starting to droop. “Come on, you’ll get sick from being in the rain.”

Phanuel grabbed his arms, finding that they were still intangible. He pretended he was holding onto Androkles, hovering his fingers right above the non-touchable skin. The rain was soaking his checkered shirt. “Let’s dance.”

Before Androkles could protest. Phanuel was jumping around in the garden, laughing despite heavy sheets of rain coming down on his head. He extended a hand to Androkles, and the ghost rolled his eyes, letting only his hand become tangible. Phanuel’s smile widened, and he pulled Androkles closer to him, eliciting a surprised noise from the writer. The man spun Androkles around as if they were in a ballroom and Androkles let his other hand become physical as he placed it behind Phanuel’s neck.

That’s when the real dancing started. Once Phanuel felt Androkles's hand on his skin, he took the other one and started to dance around the garden, avoiding the flowerbeds that were shimmering from the warm, spring fallen water. The musician let his hand float over Androkles's hip as if they were engaged in dance, and they tripped over each other’s feet while they pranced through the garden.

(They weren’t actually stumbling. It was more of Androkles's feet phasing through Phanuel’s feet, causing the both of them to laugh.)

They stopped in the middle of the path, right in front of the blooming rose bushes. The duo was out of breath, having gone in circles halfway across the garden. They laughed loudly, slightly dizzy from the constant spinning. Phanuel was still gripping onto Androkles's hand.

Water was running down the sides of Phanuel’s face, and his dark brown locks were sticking to his forehead. Now that he was up close to the man, he could see why so many people praised him for his looks. His cherry lips were parted slightly, and his eyes were big and sparkly, like a child going to the zoo to see puffins for the very first time. He watched as a droplet fell off Phanuel’s defined jaw.

“Hey, Andrew…” he asked, squinting slightly because of the rain falling into his face. “What’s your real name?”

Androkles lowered his head. “I don’t really want to answer that. You know, to keep my identity hidden.”

“Ah, that’s okay, I understand. Names are a big part of our identity, aren’t they?” They started to sway back and forth in a relaxing manner. The movement was soothing enough to make Androkles close his eyes temporarily. “They give others an image or a way of alerting us. Personally, I think names are stories of who we are. It could be Phanuel, the rising star. Or Andrew Homer, the world famous writer. Or maybe even Phanuel, the best friend, or Andrew, the son.”

Androkles pushed a finger to Phanuel’s lips, silencing him. The singer looked at him with a confused expression. “I don’t really want to think about any other identities at the moment. Right now, let’s just be Phanuel and Andrew, two people dancing in the rain together.”

The man in front of him looked shocked at his words. But the surprised look on his face melted into a smile. Soft laughter came from his mouth. “I think I like that one the best.”

They kept dancing, even after the rain stopped and the sun’s rays shone through the parted clouds. Water droplets ran off leaves and decorated the heads of flowers. There in the garden danced two people, one a completely dry ghost who made the rain fall right through him. Another, a human who was completely drenched in warm rain, smiling brightly. They stopped spinning in circles once a sneeze rang out from behind maroon fences.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

ONE IS A THOUSAND

SCENE 10:

(AT RISE: It is Clark’s death day. The scene is dark. Storm clouds roll in as CLARK stands under an umbrella. The stage is empty, with the exception of the main character. He seems to be dripping wet. Thunder sound effects roar in the background. A rusty payphone sits to the side of the stage.)

(The rain continues to fall as CLARK lifts the umbrella, allowing the audience to see his face. It’s upset, unlike the smiling CLARK who is usually around.)

CLARK

(talking to himself) You know, sometimes I think to myself… would people be more positive if death dates weren’t around? If we weren’t in such a constant state of anxiety… would anyone have bothered to live? The greats of the Renaissance did it. The fallen kingdoms of the ancient world managed to survive. And yet, we’re all just waiting for the day we die. We can’t even see the date of the day we’re supposed to die. What are all of us waiting for?

(He looks to the payphone. Fumbling with the change in his pocket, he produces a few coins from his pocket before dialing the number. After a few rings, a light shines from the dark half of the stage, revealing a distraught WILL leaning into his phone.)

WILL

Clark… Clark, where are you?!

CLARK

Will, I’m sorry if I worried you. I slipped onto a train to go visit our hometown. I wanted to see my mom before we left to see the world. Admittedly, I should’ve have told you, but—

WILL

Clark! It doesn’t matter what you did! Just tell me where you are!

CLARK

I’m at a payphone in the middle of the road. The last bus left before I could get on. It’s a good thing I had spare change, or else I wouldn’t have been able to call you. You’re always the one calling me, so this is a nice change, isn’t it?

WILL

Don’t move an inch. I’m coming to get you.

CLARK

Oh, thank you so much. It’s getting cold out here. I’m so glad I have you as a best friend. You’ve always been so protective of me. I don’t know if I’ve ever told you this, but I really appreciate everything you do for me. But could you hurry here? The only thing protecting me from the rain is this payphone and it’s not doing a really good job.

(Thunder rumbles once again.)

WILL

Clark, is it… raining there?

CLARK

Yeah, it started a bit after I left my mom’s house. Why?

WILL

Get out of there! There’s—

(There’s a snapping sound, and a wire falls onto CLARK’S side of the stage. CLARK is startled as the line cuts off. The light on WILL’S side shuts off.)

CLARK

Will? Are you there? Darnit, the line’s cut off. But I told him my location, right? Now all I have to do is… wait.

(He sits down, leaning against the payphone. He looks up to the sky, slightly tilting his umbrella.)

(cont.) I wonder how many chances people get in their lifetimes. Maybe to get the opportunity to go on a reality TV show, or sign a record label to become the next idol. Or maybe they get the chance to achieve their dreams. I don’t know, it could be something as small as being able to get a toy. But the thing I really wonder about… is how many of them they take.

(He stretches his arms, choosing to reach a hand toward the sky.)

(cont.) But maybe there are some things that come by chance. Like a ladybug landing in your hair. Or a bird making its nest in the tree outside your window. I wonder how common it is… to meet your own Will? Is it 1 out of every 5 people? Or 1 out of a hundred. Maybe even the statistic of a lightning strike!

(Lights start to flash. CLARK laughs.)

(cont.) So maybe…

(He lowers his umbrella, looking at the sky.)

(cont.) ...we’re 2 people out of 960,000 who will experience the life-changing moment we call lightning strikes. Or maybe just the greatest person you will have in your life.

(Lightning strikes the payphone. An explosion is played, and the lights flare before settling to black in almost an instant.)

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

The second Androkles opened the door, Andrew walked out, brushing against Phanuel’s pant leg, purring. The two of them watched as the feline curled up on the porch.

“I think he likes you.”

“I’m hoping he does.”

They sat down at the wooden table once again, and Androkles produced two fluffy pens out of his pocket. Phanuel raised an eyebrow.

“I like feathered pens,” Androkles confessed. He watched in amusement as Phanuel’s expression grew even more confused and then suddenly, his jaw dropped. He lifted the fluffy blue pen to eye level, gaping.

“It’s not quills…?” Phanuel gasped. “Oh my god, it’s not quills!”

Androkles laughed. The world only knew half of the story, didn’t they?

He laid out the music sheets in front of them. The two had written all of the music, now all that was left to write were the lyrics. Then, Phanuel would leave his house and he would never see him again.

Something about that future made his heart grow heavy. But he couldn’t think about it now, he was working. “So, your theme was petrichor? A metaphor for finding inspiration after a long bout of musician’s block?”

“Yep. I got some inspiration while I was walking here. You know how you have a bunch of plants in your backyard.” Androkles nodded. “Well, what happens when there’s no rain?”

“They dry up. Oh, so you’re going to use plants in the song, too?”

“Uh huh. Listen to these lyrics I came up with. It’s only a few lines, but we can build off of them.” Phanuel cleared his throat and strummed the first chord of the intro. “Under gentle mornings, I’m waking to fading dreams. Little quiet mournings, it’s sunny today, it seems… Can you continue from there?”

Androkles hummed in thought. “Uh, so you wanted plants in the song. Hmmm… I got it! Strawberries and roses are drying under the light. Raincoats and umbrellas are sitting on the sides.” He remembered the other day, where they were dancing in the rain, spinning between the roses bushes and stepping over perennials. The memory of Phanuel erupting in a loud sneeze once the sun shone through made the ghost smile to himself.

Phanuel repeated the words, plucking through the chords while playing it fingerstyle. “The sky is so blue, the world is clear, but there’s no peace in my mind. My breath is taken, flying far away, but when will teardrops fall from the sky?”

Teardrops fell from heaven in the backyard, Androkles was sure of it. Even if they fell through him and left him dry, they still gave life to the grass underneath his feet. But they left Phanuel soaked in spring’s rain. “I long for the day, for cloudy worlds and rainy skies, and sitting under my umbrella is a cat next to my side.”

The memory of Andrew on top of the bookshelf came to his mind. He nearly burst out into laughter. If it weren’t for Andrew, he wouldn’t have a pen name. He wouldn’t be the 21st century’s most famous author. He wouldn’t have shown who he truly was to Phanuel.

Phanuel kept playing the sand colored guitar. “The rain is pouring down, it’s dancing. Smiling strawberries love more. When it passes by, put down your hood and—”

“Smell the petrichor,” they said in unison.

“That’s—That’s it!” Phanuel screamed. “That’s gonna be the first verse and the chorus! We’ve got to write it down!”

“Already ahead of you,” Androkles said, holding up a paper with the words of the song written in ink. “Now we just need the rest and then we’re done.”

“We’ll actually be done… I can’t believe that.”

“Me neither. Now, let’s get to work.”

They ran through the written lyrics once more, making some adjustments. Then they started on the second verse, throwing ideas at each other and refining the words. Before long, there was a full sheet of lyrics, inspired by the past few days of hesitation and dancing. The story, which was observed from a person’s point of view, was weaved through the experiences of sunny weather and joyful plants, accompanied by a cat pressed against the human’s side.

“And… done.” Androkles wrote the final word and dropped the pen, shaking his arm. He had an ache in his wrist today. “Alright, it’s all written. Here.”

He handed the paper to Phanuel, who was looking at the lyrics starstruck. “These are amazing…! You’re such a skilled songwriter.”

Androkles flushed. “I’m just a writer, that’s all.”

“The most popular writer of the 21st century.”

“Andrew Homer would be disappointed in these lyrics.”

“Andrew Homer wrote these lyrics. Be proud of what you’ve created.” Phanuel grinned widely, showing off his teeth. Now that Androkles looked at it, one of his front teeth was a bit crooked. It seemed that the rising star had flaws in his appearance as well. “I know I am.”

He was growing redder by the second. Androkles hid his face behind his hands. “T-Thank you, then.”

Phanuel nodded, causing his hair to bounce up. He looked at the time displayed on the wall. His smile dropped. “It… looks like it’s time for me to go. It’s 7.”

The writer rotated his body around, finding that the time was indeed 7:00. Disappointment rose up in him. He turned back to Phanuel, who had a slightly saddened expression as well. “Oh, I guess it is. Let me help you gather your stuff.”

The two of them were both taking their time cleaning up and they knew it. Phanuel set his guitar back in its case slower than he previously did, and he cleaned the inside thoroughly, cleaning out nonexistent dirt. Androkles gathered the music sheets, pretending to not know the order and gently placing them in numerical order. He took the pens and put them to the side of the table. Phanuel tightened his strap, refastening it even though he knew it fit perfectly on him. Suddenly, after a few minutes of cleaning their workplace in silence, they realized that there was nothing else to reorganize.

Androkles decided to break the silence. “So! I’ll lead you to the door.”

Phanuel nodded, even though the door was only a few feet away from the two of them.

The duo walked to the door and Androkles unlocked it slowly, hesitating before pulling it open. Phanuel stepped onto the porch, taking in the fresh smell of earth. It had rained in the morning once again, leaving the air slightly damp and the pot with the strawberries watered. The musician turned around to face Androkles, who handed the sheets of paper to him.

“Thank you for everything, Andrew. I think my musician’s block is finally going away. It’s all because of you.” Phanuel gave him a bright smile and he shook his head.

“I only gave you the opportunity to be creative. You’re the one who truly overcame it.”

A silence fell over them. They stared at each other, waiting for the other to say goodbye. They both didn’t want to hear those words.

“Hey, Andrew, can I make a request?”

“As what? The client or as Phanuel?’

“As Phanuel.” He stepped forward, their one-inch difference seeming to be a large, unfulfilled gap. “Could you.. make yourself tangible so I can give you a hug?”

Androkles smiled, letting his body become a physical object. “Go ahead. I don’t leave any unsatisfied clients.”

Phanuel embraced him, and Androkles felt his touch on his skin. There was a living being hugging him, radiating warmth from under their fingertips. Androkles’s hair was brushing against Phanuel’s nose, tickling him. There was light, such a bright light inside of him, brighter than the sun. The man pulled away from the ghost, looking at him fondly.

“You know, to the world, you might be Andrew Homer, the world famous author. To your cat, you might be its beloved owner. To your agent, you’re their boss. But to me…” He took Androkles’s tangible hands, finally being able to lift then. “You're my inspiration, my muse, and my coworker. But most of all, you’re my friend.”

Something about the genuine look in Phanuel’s eyes made a tear slip down his face. Or maybe it was the stinging of the warm air around them. Whatever it was, it made him overwhelmed with emotion, inundating him in happiness. Phanuel wiped it away.

“Andrew, don’t cry…”

“It’s Androkles.” Phanuel’s hand paused, lightly touching the skin of Androkles’s cheek. He took it in his own hand. “My real name is Androkles. Andrew Homer is my cat’s name. I used it for my pen name. But keep it a secret, will you?”

There was a moment of nothing. Then, they started to laugh together, their hands still clasped.

“Who gave you that idea?”

“I wanted to have an alias so no one would know who I was. Andrew is the only thing I’ve ever stayed outside for.”

“Brilliant. A cat is the true writer for One is a Thousand.”

Androkles giggled. “It is. Now shoo, it’s getting dark. You should get home before the sun sets.”

Phanuel sighed, pulling away from Androkles. “I really should. Thank you again. I guess this is goodbye, Androkles.”

“I guess it is.” His face fell, but the bubbling happiness inside didn’t fade. “I’ll be waiting for ‘Petrichor’ to hit the top of the Billboards. Goodbye, Phanuel.”

The musician walked down the steps of Androkles’s porch, leaving the ghost alone with the smell of the world after rain.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

ONE IS A THOUSAND

(AT RISE: A coffin is set in the middle of the stage. The characters are all dressed in black, and quietly mourn. The group includes WILL, MOM, COWORKERS, and multiple other characters that CLARK has met in his lifetime.)

(A speaker steps onto a podium.)

SPEAKER

We’re gathered here to mourn the loss of Clark Bell. His death was due on the day of May 18, 2016, and has arrived much sooner than we had all hoped. At the age of 26, Clark became an office worker in the city. Although he pushed papers all day, he still kept his dream of traveling the world buried deep in his heart. Clark finally got a step closer to his dream, but it was cut short after a lightning strike hit the payphone he was at. Will, if you would please.

(WILL walks up to the podium with a grief-stricken expression. He clears his throat.)

WILL

I… have no words to express how I feel about Clark’s death. There’s nothing that exists that can convey my grief. Clark had such a defined identity. He was a son. He was a co-worker to some, and he was a bright customer to others. He was the person living above apartment #2 and he was the stranger in the crowd. He was… my best friend. He existed differently in each and every one of our minds. He was a single person, yet he was a thousand different people. But in the end… he was Clark. Just Clark. The guy that wanted to see the world. To chase puffins off beaches. He just wanted… to be free. And I’m so sorry to say I wasn't there when he needed me. That’s all.

(He steps off the podium. The funeral progression plays out and slowly, people start to leave. The only two people remaining are WILL and MOM. The latter approaches WILL.)

MOM

Hello there, Will.

WILL

Hi, Mrs. Bell. I’m sorry. I’m probably the last person you want to see. I… didn’t arrive on time.

MOM

(shaking her head) Never. You’ve always punctual. Always working so hard. Just some of the many qualities Clark admired in you. He loved you so much.

WILL

Loved?

MOM

Yes. My son loved you. He loved many things. He was in love with life. You know that better than anyone. You two spent a lot of time together. He loved you so much, he wanted you to have this.

(She pushes an envelope into his hands.)

(cont.) Inside are two tickets to the Accademia. He talked about it a lot with you, didn’t he? It was his dream to see the art there with you. He talked to me about it right before he left my house. There was a line he would say to you if you said that the place was beautiful. What was it? “Yes, the statues are beautiful. But the real piece of art here is right in front of me.” He left them with me because… he knew his death date all along. It was always circled on our calendar at home. Clark was a brilliant boy, it didn’t take him long to figure it out.

(She laughs quietly.)

(cont.) What he wants you to do is to go and explore the world, Will. He wants you to experience the thrills of life and be able to come back and say, “I’ve changed.” Clark wants you to travel the world. He wants to find someone and get married, settle down and have a family. Make an identity for yourself just as Will. Just live as you are.

(WILL starts to cry. He looks up from the letter and hugs MOM.)

WILL

Thank you so much.

MOM

Don’t thank me. Thank Clark. He is the one who is truly a thousand.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Androkles didn’t think it was necessary to confine himself to these terms. In fact, he preferred to be referred to as Androkles Hemming, not the internationally famous Andrew Homer, or the introverted ghost, just Androkles. He was, in literal terms, a ghostwriter, but he chose not to be part of any world. Phanuel helped him realize that he could just be himself.

Now he was in his kitchen, humming the words to Petrichor, one of the biggest hits to have ever been on the radio. It broke multiple records in its first week, become one of the most listened to songs in history. The music industry had been overturned by the release of Phanuel’s new album, Ghost, and his fame exploded. Androkles was content with listening to talk show hosts rave about the star’s sudden rise to fame.

The album, in Androkles’s opinion, was honest, and that’s why it succeeded. It was an honest, catchy masterpiece that took the hearts of the public and twisted a knife of emotion and life in them, causing millions to fall to their knees. From what Androkles heard, Phanuel’s worldwide tour had just sold out.

“...on the show is one of the world’s most popular idols out there. He's the mastermind behind the hit Petrichor, and one of the youngest artist to have hit the number 1 spot on the Billboards. Introducing... Phanuel!”

A familiar voice came on.“Thank you for having me here. I’m really honored to have the opportunity be on the radio. Oh no, I don’t know what to say. I’m nervous.”

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost, Phanuel.”

Laughter broke out. After the wheezing stopped, the host spoke up once again. “So, Phanuel, where exactly did you get the inspiration for writing the songs on Ghost?”

“I got it from just sitting down and observing the world around me. You’d be surprised how much you can learn by just listening to yourself. Also, most of the songs are inspired by stories from my favorite author, Andrew Homer. I’d say that a lot of my music is influenced by him.”

“Wise answer. What would you say is the main message of the album, and what’s the story behind your main track, ‘Petrichor’?”

“I wanted to tell a story about identity. We live in a world where people spend their whole lives trying to find who they are. Some people hide who they are, while others fake it. I wanted to show the world that it’s okay to be yourself. Now, as for the title track, it’s about finding light after going through dark times. It’s actually inspired by my own experiences. I had musician’s block for a long time, and after being taught important lessons from a dear friend of mine, I overcame it. I want to go back to my hometown and tell them thank you, but I have a world tour ahead of me.”

“A busy man you are. That’s all we have for today, make sure if you want tickets…”

Androkles turned down the radio, taking his eggs off the pan and dumping them onto a porcelain plate. He shut the stove off, taking the plate and sitting at the table in the living room, which had a pencil holder filled with fluffy pens in the middle.

The famous was traveling the world, living his dream. The enigmatic was at home. The aliases of ‘friends’ still lingered in the garden, refusing to wash away in the rain.

He pulled out his phone, checking his social media. Androkles laughed happily at the most recent post, stuffing more eggs in his mouth.

yay strawberry

The flowers on the strawberry were blooming.

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