#ive been jumpscared one too many times

[miraculous-showtime]

i get bored and i don't feel like drawing so i end up making 5000 textposts

[coldbycrossfade]

local elf so rock hard and turgid he jumpscares kirkwall's champion in his foyer for that

Mage

Pussy

[taylorshope]

Daniel's eyebrows 🤝 Mark's eyebrows

[dilfbuck]

I miss that game. My computer died on me and have not been able to replace it, so I can play again. I will say, though, having a huge fear of the ocean and playing that game is something else, but the game looked like so much fun when I saw play thoughs of it I couldn't resist.

It's definitely fun! I'm not really afraid of the ocean I don't think, but the game still scares me sometimes 😭😭 the reaper leviathans make me cry a little bit, it's fine

[sidesteppostinghours]

WIP its-not-Wednesday-but-close-enough

tagged by @autistic-sidestep! thank you for the tag :D i have,,, so many wips rn. pulp stop starting a million projects challenge. all of these are very rough, and a lot of them feature other steps, but i wanted to share a few :]

for writing, ive got these:

“What the hell, man!” Mitchel hisses. He’s let go, but he hasn’t bothered lowering his voice. Too loud, but real. Caine groans, pulling themselves up from the mattress. At least it wasn’t the floor– this could’ve hurt a lot worse. They wince at the throb in their shoulder as they reach for the wall, probing for a light switch. When he flicks it on reality re-establishes itself once more.  It’s Caine’s room, familiarly bare-bones. There’s only a singular twin sized bed in one corner of the room and a desk just across, with a heap of laundry they haven’t bothered to do taking up the chair. Mitchel stands on the mattress in the middle, both parts pissed and bleary eyed. His cheek is a lightish colour that’s a telltale sign it’s going to bruise, and a portion of his blanket stubbornly clings onto his shoulder. There’s no threat in here, or at least nothing more threatening than Mitchel annoyed. The knowledge doesn’t stop the blood pounding in their ears.

-caine wakes up and gets jumpscared by @hyper-pixels mitchel. they react to this calmly.

Marshal Steel has hair stuck in his finger joints. That's the first thing Daniel noticed when he came in to work this morning. Steel has his civilian hands on, which is normal when he has admin work. Those civilian hands will usually have hair in it too, mostly from Spoon. That's also normal. What's not normal is the colour; because instead of the odd tufts of grey fur Daniel's used to seeing scattering Steel's joints, this is a single, longer strand that he's sure wasn't left on purpose. Because the hair strand is brown. Suspiciously similar to Ortega's own brown hair.

-herald is suspicious that his boss is having another secret relationship with a pretty old man, but its none of his business! not at all. thats why hes eavesdropping on them from the breakroom pantry.

“What are you two talking about?” Ortega jerks, nearly spilling coffee all over Wei, tearing a curse out of him as he yanks his head to the direction of the voice.  Speak of the devil. Caine glances between the two, head cocked. When did he get here? Ortega doesn't remember inviting him, and nobody told him he was coming either. Not that Ortega isn't happy to see him, but the timing… “Dios mio, Spot, how long have you been standing there?” he mutters. He gives his coffee a once over, but nothing's spilled.  He turns back to Caine and double takes. The poor guy looks like he's just run a marathon– he's drenched in his own sweat. He's not wearing his raggedy sweater, for once. Instead, he's got a skintight suit with a simple white tee over it.

-a multi-pov fic featuring the same conversation, but told from the perspective of ortega, chen, and caine. trying to practice voices with it, and so far its been fun digging into each of them!

as for art wips:

-arde and vera based on the song "the villain i appear to be"! i actually made this today after playing the new revelations demo lmfao. i do not remember what arde looks like 😔 im so sorry ive done you a disservice

the next two have blood+mild gore in them, so im throwing them under the cut!

-cyrus gets Fucked Up by a dream version of fawn from @villainsidestep, based on this absolutely vile(/pos) soul read of him:

because why not fuck him up even more??

-mitchel painting i have yet to put down colours for that i am lovingly dubbing "cannibalism (NOT ROMANTIC)". chew it out with your teeth mitchel!!!!

ill be tagging everybody mentioned in the post, plus @idlenight, @disastersteps, and maybe @euelios if you all wanna give this a shot?

[borzoilover69]

> BORZOI: READ HOMESTUCK LIKE ITS 2011 (PART 5)

We pick back up after [S] END OF ACT 6 INTERMISSION 1 (page 4390) with a fucking spectacular music number (Infinity mechanism - Thomas ferkol). I'm such a big fan of the beat that comes in when we get to see Jane looking out her window, you have no idea. Also I didn't cover the intermission because i didn't say much. I appreciate and love the beta kids and trolls but I just have more gears turning where the alpha kids are involved because they're not so clear cut and dry emotional wise as the betas. I'm pretty sure greater analysers than me have said all there needs to be said for the beta kids. All I have to add is this piece of dialog from 4359 that I liked:

KARKAT: ALRIGHT IF YOU'RE REALLY GOING TO GO KARKAT: JUST KARKAT: BE CAREFUL KARKAT: NO MORE POINTLESS BLOODSHED, OK? THAT'S AN ORDER! KARKAT: WAIT FUCK KARKAT: I'M NOT LEADER ANYMORE KARKAT: ROSE CAN YOU ORDER HER TO DO THAT? KARKAT: SAY WHAT I JUST SAID, REALLY ANGRILY KARKAT: ASSUMING YOU CAN EVEN BE ANGRY. ROSE: ...

I really love how clingy Karkat but also accepting of his friends decisions goes. It's one of his great points as a knight of blood, but it also leads to some pretty funny turnabouts as he contradicts himself and fights himself on it.

4394 GIRL LOOK OUT

4397 (call back to page 4107) Oh wait I've seen this before. That's neat.

4400: Get this shit outta the way. You're a busy bureaucrat. The clock is ticking, and time is dead kids.

Dead kids you say?

4405 Well dead kids it is. These scenes.. when i read these scenes.. with such shitty sketch lines.. in my mind I hear Buy Somethin Will Ya? from the Earthbound OST. Or Hi Hi Hi (Theme of Saturn Valley).

You should be pleased to know those nuts were super deadly! Though to be fair he doesn't know if he died from the poison, or just choked on a bunch of barely chewed peanut bits. You know what else is super deadly, you say? Knives. Sharp deadly knives you stick in people's soft torsos to make them bleed until they die.

He doesn't have anything to say to that.

Dude i love this guy like deadass him and his whimsical hats and umbrellas and whatnot. I think he's my fav besides DD.

4408

Lifey thing..

4413 IVE SEEN THIS BEFORE. HOLY SHIT!!(3220)

4419 I really like parallels in homestuck. They make the world go round, you could say, because you read things and dont feel as lost because in a way it's strikingly familiar! Which is what happens here.

4422 Oh hunny.. nobody understands how whimsical. Jane crocker is to me. Look at her. ooo. That's a face. :o. õoô She is the whimsy.

Nobody takes into account how many batshit things Jane sees and she hits them all with the ,':| ....

You guess you should feel grateful toward him for saving your life, but you know he's just as likely to rescue you from an explosion as he is to randomly teleport you across town, forcing you to call your dad and ask for a ride home, while you spend all day standing in some random field in the pouring rain while you wait hours for your dad to come and pick you up after he gets lost because he plugged the wrong place into google maps.

I really like the small bits of background we get about Jane too. Like this! Its such a nice scene. But it seems.. that uh oh! Guardian jumpscare.

He tells you to get inside this instant.

Goddamn. Now where have i seen this before.. 4430 referencing 212.

Except in this case, it's no case of magical happenstance gone awry with a server player losing internet, but a dad being.. a *tad* more serious than given with how you're so totally grounded. No wonder Jane is so stubborn!

As long as you just got done paying the piper, you might as well get busy eating all this goddamn crow. Oh so much of the stuff has gathered on your plate.

Eating the crow:  to admit that one was wrong or accept that one has been defeated.

paying the piper: bear the consequences of an action or activity that one has enjoyed.

These sayings are sooo cool too. Like I've never heard anyone use them but they're really neat!

[natsmagi]

Could we hear more of what you think about nojiken? sjdkjs I don't really see many people talking about the seiyuus and especially stuff they've done outside the current media but there's this one song in particular that uses nojiken's really pretty voice so well !

Small, maybe fair warning that it uses binaural audio so that you don't get jumpscared but aa

https://on.soundcloud.com/yxPrz (ohh you can't really direct links in anon, makes sense.. but yee)

— @enchantedmirage

oh like ?? on him as a person or his other works ??? because as a person i think he is so sweet!! he really does have that. peak Dad energy and humor which is so funny to me KASHFKUASHG i listened to his appearance on that genshin radio featuring tomoaki maeno (since theyre the voices of albedo and zhongli but also natsume and hokuto!!) AND HES JUST ?? A FUN LOVABLE GUY!!! and its cute to see the love and adoration he holds for the characters he voices too............ and his kids telling him he sucks at genshin impact KIUASHFKUAJHSDG

BUT IF WE'RE TALKING ABOUT HIS OTHER WORKS! tbh i havent really consumed much in terms of like. Full scale looks at the other characters he voices. ive mentioned it before but im not really an anime guy so me coming across him doesnt happen much, but i do spend a decent amount of time listening to his character songs, covers and solo work!! i love his voice alot!!! though i WILL SAY. one time out of curiosity i was like "hmmmm i wonder what the equestria girls songs sound like in japanese......" (i had been listening to it in various languages) but i couldnt find it, so i simply checked out the movie itself in japanese and tried skipping to song bits (theyre in eng......) AND FUCKING. NOJIKEN AS FLASH SENTURY JUMPSCARED THE SHIT OUT OF ME. SO NOW I JUST HAVE A SOUNDBITE OF TWILIGHT SPARKLES NAME UTTERED IN NATSUME SAKASAKIS VOICE

LIEKIAILWHEURIKYSEJDLASUFKSJDLHDFGHJLFKHJKL WHY IS HE IN THERE GET OUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

also i listened to the song and OHHHH ITS SO PRETTY.......... I REALLY LOVE THE ENERGY OF IT................... i love tragic songs with gothic vibes it eats so hard every time thank u for sharing this w me bc i had not before heard it !!

[cerealmonster15]

a bit of both- I was too scared to go off anon cuz I would've been embarrassed if I was wrong 😭

They INVENTED divorce. You get it.

And I DONT MIND YOUR THOUGHRS ARE SO SILLY!! pls invitation to come back on stage and scream about the guys ever 🥺

ksjdlfdsklfj I Understand 🙏 i hope it is ok that i took this message as an excuse to Continue Going Wild

head empty only tiny guy doodles now

while i was doodling i remembered ruggie and silver both have a vignette with jade where Food Is Involved... im obsessed w/the one where jade gives his mushrooms to the cafeteria bc azul and floyd banished them, and silver has them the next day and is like This Is The Best Risotto Ive Ever Had In My Life. and jades just watching him like 👁️👁️ and theres the one where ruggie accidentally takes jades ingredients and is like OH SHIT DONT KILL ME here i'll teach you a cool recipe!!!! i love how often these boys bond over food actually.... ruggie helped kalim cook in another vignette... jade and kalim talked about tea [and then jade died bc kalim uses too much sugar LOL]

more rambling and screen shots i have to go bonkers or i will die

oh my god and the second tsum event. theres the cutest little rythmatic of jamil kalim floyd and azul in the kitchen with tsums 😭😭😭 i want the second years to have a potluck........

ALSO i love in the first volume of the twst anthology, chapter 13 where it basically turns into the second years coming together and trying to help silver stay awake and hanging out EXCEPT THE FISH ARE NNNNOT INVITED!!! or like. theyre just not in that story fdslkjfds and jamil just shows up at the end..

KALIM'S SO CUTE HE'S SOOOO EXCITED He just JUMPS IN like OH DID SOMEONE SAY FRIENDSHIP STUDY GROUP???????

also

why did he do that. he was talking about riddle and they literally got riddle involved bc ruggie suggested it but here's the thing!!! silver is the one that needed notes bc he fell asleep. kalim joined up and was like lets study together and have a feast!! so ruggies like oh hell yea im in it for the food. why did he decide riddle needed to be there 🤔 i mean maybe he did actually want to study and/or didnt wanna be the one suckered into leading the study session LOL but. i think it kinda just looks like he wants to hang out with riddle jflsjeklkj like he literally later says "but im here for the feast" so WHY did you get RULES ABIDING RIDDLE involved HMMM??? watching you ruggie bucchi.

theyre literally SO cute i LOVE the anthology mangas SO MUCH and i really wish they'd make a third one!!!

god i actually. forgot a lot about this one LOL there's a lot of cute moments w/them 😭

ALSO now that im at my computer i could search better and i FOUND THE POST where i talked endlessly about riddle/floyd. i still stand by all of that. and theres cute anthology moments in there too.

third year divorce jumpscare while im in the anthologies

i love them theyre so fucking funny. also why are there So Many Times in game where vil basically says "yeah leona is extremely physically attractive HOWEVER his personality sucks and i hate him." like okay. why do you have to keep telling us that leona has a "pretty face" or "only good for his looks" or whatever it is he says fjsdkljekl. that's nice vil.

pushing them back out of the way back to the second years

and trey. im still trapped in the anthologies since thats whats in front of me klfjlewjsdfjkls god the way this one takes place after jamils meltdown and hes like "omg trey senpai....... and jade 😒........" Get His Ass sdfdsfg god i dont have a screenshot rn but another top 10 moments of twst for me that made me cry laughing was when i was reading cater's union bday card and jamil asks him that interview question "which dorm would you pick if you werent in heartslabyul" and god the TIMING with cater saying octavinelle INSTANTLY making jamil SCOWL IN DISAPPROVAL at the SHEER MENTION OF THE FISH BITCH DORM is SO funny to me. EW. GROSS. DISGUSTING!!! i so badly want riddle and jamil to bond over their mutual fish hading sjdklfe theyre SO FUNNYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

and yet in masquerade event. jamil bullies azul. azul buillies him back. they DANCE TOGETHER IN BOTH OF THE RHYTHM GAMES. theyre DUO PARTNERS to azuls ssr. riddle and jamil compliment [more or less LOL] azul's singing performance at the end. i think once or twice riddle and jamil also share a few 😑😑 moments over azul... being azul jdkslfjkdsljf and it's EVERYTHING TO ME it was so validating bc i think those three should hang out forever.

OK THAT'S ENOUGH DISORGANIZED RAMBLES FOR NOW I GOTTA CONTAIN MYSELF!!!

[armandjolras]

This will be rambly and overly personal, but ive been wanting to talk about Fosca as chronic illness representation, and why the musical version of her is especially relatable in this sense.

(I also haven’t read the book, so maybe some changes im attributing to the musical are from the book)

In the movie, Fosca’s illness almost seems an extension of her ugliness, meant to horrify the viewer. Ugliness takes focus as her main burden; we’re told that she was shunned for her looks as a child and are shown many jumpscare shots of her face. Sickness is merely a consequence of ugliness. When not acutely ill, she seems quite healthy, even energetic. (Obviously having seizures is a very serious illness in real life, i just mean the way it’s presented in the movie).

Most interesting to me, she doesn’t seem depressed at all; she’s quite upbeat and witty. Her manipulative toxicity in the movie doesn’t come from depression, but rather because she’s never been treated as a woman due to being an outcast, so she doesn’t feel she has to adhere to the decorum of one.

In the musical, I see Fosca’s illness as being much more than just an extension of being ugly. It appears to affect her continuously between acute episodes, and she moves wearily as if fighting pain and discomfort at every moment. While suffering over ugliness still caused her illness in this version, that ugliness is not as emphasised. We’re told that her parents loved her rather than shunning her, so she wasn’t an outcast, and she’s depicted as more pathetic spinster than scary Nosferatu.

She is also clearly depressed. In my opinion, her toxic behaviour comes not from flouting social norms, but from the desperation of depression. Maybe others also relate to being depressed and behaving badly as a cry for help, unable to stop despite knowing you’re being toxic, because you need acknowledgment from people. I see Fosca’s behaviour this way. Georgio is the first person who is nice to her, so she physically can’t stop trying to extract love from him by any means, even when she admits she’s in the wrong.

I relate to Fosca strongly in this. Since 2020 I’ve struggled with multiple chronic illnesses which have limited my physical abilities; today I cant even sit upright for more than 15 minutes, some days less. Since I dont have any family or friends in the country where I’m living, and went through diagnosis and surgery alone mid Covid, at times I’ve felt very isolated. In 2022 i could tell I was behaving a lot like Fosca — I didnt do anything super toxic, but I was putting too much emotional burden on my long-distance parents even as I knew I was stressing them out and upsetting them. It felt like such a compulsion, because I was scared and isolated and wanted someone else to know how much I was suffering so I wouldn’t be alone it it. I’m much healthier mentally now, but that took therapy and medication which Fosca doesn’t have. Its a terrible feeling to see your world getting smaller and your dreams becoming less possible, and going through that alone.

I’ve had a lot of frustration towards how my illnesses have limited what I can do, and i have to make an effort not to be resentful towards healthier people. The line “I read about the joys the world / Dispenses to the fortunate / And listen for the echoes” really captures this. “I know how soon a dream becomes an expectation / How can I have expectations?” When your world gets smaller, you have to give up your hopes bit by bit so you dont get hurt. “Look at me / No, captain, look at me / Look at me!” In her desperation she demands his attention, even when she knows she’s being rude and repelling him, she just feels compelled to connect with someone.

I know “I Read” can be interpreted as being about her ugliness rather than of physical illness, and maybe that actually is the correct interpretation. But I’m very convinced that musical Fosca is depressed in a way that movie Fosca is not, and most of her words and actions stem from that. I also believe that by placing less emphasis on her shocking ugliness, it only makes since that a lot of her suffering is due to her physical illness. 

(And I also relate to Fosca’s final letter, where she says that appreciating the beauty in the world around you makes you want to go on living. Being ill has taught me to be much more grateful for small things in life.)

Other disclaimers: I dont mean Fosca’s suffering in the movie is NOT about her illness, in both versions its a combo of ugliness + illness. I just think they’re in different ratios. Also im not trying to be a Fosca apologist, I know shes super toxic and a stalker and essentially an incel, and also super annoying, I just understand her perspective. And finally I do like movie Fosca! Shes iconic I just relate to musical Fosca more.

[bucktommys]

IVE BEEN FOLLOWING YOU SINCE FOREVER HOW DID I NOT KNOW YOU WROTE MR LAFD UPDATES MAN??????

anyways, thank you for that fic. i’ve read it so so many times and it has to be one of my favorite 911 fics ever. i can’t believe i never realized it was you lol

you mean you can't tell the ugh_megs influence from my tags on eddie gifsets? /j

(but on the real, thank you so so much, im so glad u enjoyed it!! 🥺🥺 it's always funny if someone finds my blog through gifs because then they are jumpscared by the fact i on occasion write fic too haha. it really is the pipeline of <b><small> on tumblr captions to whatever the html on lafd updates turned out to be)

[confuseddipshit]

its kinda far away from what i expected it to turn out, strayed a bit in the middle, but its here once again. as always, sorry for the lack of cut, mobile tumblr isnt that fancy. enjoy.

⚠️cw: few mentions of blood, nothing too explicit; maybe some emotional neglect? not much though. much lighter than my last poem. still have some grammar mistakes, but theyre there on purpose, i refuse to write I'm instead or im.

i had a normal childhood, you know.

used to be that one kid that get an A and stay sad for an entire week that it wasnt an A+. used books to escape from reality since i read my first letter, so the first time i read romeo and juliet, i was 5 years old. it was an old copy with some eldritch language that i couldnt quite grasp at the time, too many details passed unnoticed.

but besides the introversion and shyness that appeared out of the blue when i turned 4, it was pretty common. my parents never laid a finger in me, nor threatened to do so.

how i wish they had.

of course, i never gave them reasons to do so, but many do it without reason, let alone a good one, so sometimes i wonder what would have happened if i wasnt too tame.

if i had questioned more. had complained more. screamed and cried and asked for more. i wonder how long would it be before they had lost their temper.

pretty long, thats for sure. they were always so controlled.

i guess, thats the entire point now. the stoicism to which i was exposed since birth couldnt make much good for a child. never experiencing the bad sides means the good sides were, too, hidden; never being hit also means that i never felt desired.

see, i did feel loved sometimes. when my mom brushed my hair before school. when my dad would let me mess with his hair while he was watching the news. when theyd both hold my hands when we were walking to the market to buy some bread for dinner.

but there was a time where it all would come to an end. i couldnt feel desired when mom decided she was done brushing my hair, and i had to decide between learn how to take care of it or cut it at the age of 6. and i certainly didnt feel desired when my dad wouldnt lift and carry me anymore at the age of 8. (he couldnt for health reasons, but of course my 8 years old self could never compreehend it).

now im 19 years old. since i was 14, ive been craving something, but could never get close enough to see what it was - or i was too aware of it, and therefore too scared of not being able to hide that side of mine. i took out the blanket that hid it, some time ago, and came to the conclusion that i crave suffering.

not the emotional kind, that i have a lot. you cant go unharmed from "gifted child, parents pride and joy" to "burnt out queer young adult".

i crave the physical counterpart of it. i crave a reason, a good one, something that justifies the intense unhappyness, this indifference and apathy thats always creeping around the corners, hiding in plain sight.

i crave broken arms and black eyes, i crave bruises and crooked noses and raw knuckles. i crave a few broken teeth and a blood-red stained record in school, with a few too many fights and a few too little good grades.

i crave the disappointment and the freedom it brings when no one expects nothing else from you.

i crave intenseness and adrenaline. i crave jumpscares and fist fights, and damn right, i crave pain.

hope you liked it, all feedback is welcome, please like and reblog if you enjoyed, makes a lot of difference for the artist. tell me if i forgot some kind or trigger/content warning or tag, im kinda new to this.

-> you can request a story, if you have something in your head that you think its too weird to ask other authors, i love weirdness and will write for anyone and anything that i can read about so. pretty much every existent character :) thats it for today bye

[garbage-eater144]

THE WARFSTACE AUTOMATED INTERVIEW CAPTIONS

i was chattin in the discord and some people said it was tough to understand some bits, obviouslt this is made by a fan (me) so it might have a couple errors here and there but ive checked through it quite a few times and it seems about as right as i can get it.

so !!SPOILERS AHEAD!! also @markiplier feel free to correct me if you see this thank u <3 The warfstache automated interview

Starting video captions

[Wilford] Well, that’s terrifying… one moment!

{mechanical whirring}

[Wilford] (frightened sound) marginally better… er worse… better? Worse. It’s much worse.

{mechanical whirring}

[Wilford] Ah! there we are. Welcome, pretend I remembered your name here, this is a pre-recorded message anyway, I would NOT want to be in the same building as that thing I tell you me. Anyway, thank you whoever you are for agreeing to test out the Warfstache automated interview automaton, or {yelling} WAIA for short. Let’s start off with some quick calibration. All you need to do is sit back, relax and listen for some numbers. Okay? Here we go.

[WAIA]- (phone dialing, dialup tone, windows error sound)

[WAIA]- (scary mechanical garbled noises, followed by a ding and celebratory trumpets.)

[wilford]- now what did you hear? Numbers? Good numbers. Keep in mind I have no idea what youre going to say due to the fact that, as I said before, this message is pre-recorded. But if you did hear something, now would be the time to speak up.

[wilford]- don’t be shy, I’m sure nothing bad will happen. I don’t know what you’re going to say but if it does happen it will happen and if it doesn’t happen it wont happen. Thats how deterministic reality works.

I Think I Heard Numbers!

[wilford] Thats great! Or bad, not really sure what you said, but I choose to remain positive and assume that you are still alive. which means our automated friend here is operating well within acceptable murder parameters. We’re one step closer to mass production! THE WORLD DEMANDS MORE INTERVIEWS! And I cant be everywhere at once all the time, only some of the time! Even you might land an interview some day! Maybe, probably not, depends on how these next few minutes go. On to the next test! Word association! The fundamental basis of any good interview is getting the goods out of those stubborn interview-ees. The WAIA will say a word and you just say back the first thing that pops into your little head! Simple! Right? probably. Good luck!

{mechanical whirring}

[WAIA]- initializing word association training protocol round 1

{scary mechanincal noises} [WAIA]- Please respond. [WAIA] Sorry, I didnt get that. Round 2. {yet more scary mechanical noise}

[WAIA]- please respond.

[WAIA]- response unclear, increasing aggression

{clicking and mechanical sounds}

[WAIA]- round 3. {increasingly threatening mechanical noise} [WAIA]- Please respond.

[WAIA]-5 [WAIA]-4 [WAIA]-3 [WAIA]-2

Sounded like nightmare garbage to me…

[WAIA]- {mechanical ah?} {clicking}

[Wilford]- oh I forgot to mention, please do not say the word nightmare, or uh garbage, or nightmare garbage, or any combination of those words, the WAIA is just a little bit sensitive Yknow, a little touchy feely. Well not really touchy feely.. we-well actually REALLY touchy feely depending on your definition of touch and feely. Its really gonna-

[WAIA]- {jumpscare sounds} [WAIA] I. tell. you. me.

But you didn’t say anything…

[WAIA]- 1

[WAIA]-response unclear. Increasing aggression.

{ding sound effect} [WAIA]- {jumpscare noise}

[WAIA]- it. was. an. accident.

Uh… potato salad?

[WAIA]- 1

[WAIA]- response accepted

{ding followed by triumphant trumpets}

[WAIA]- word association raining protocol compl-{mechanical freakout eeeeeete}

[Wilford]- most dearest next of kin, I regret to inform you, that your dearly beloved and/or most despised has regrettably but not unexpectedly become recently deceased in the line of duty. Be confident in the knowledge that their demise was just as likely to be quick and painless as it was slow and agonizing. Please do not respond to this voicemail as the number has already been disconnected. {clears throat} alright that should do it for the… death scenario, now onto ah, er, uh, the survivors {mumbling}. Wow! Potato salad. A real thinker, you. But the test has been passed with flying colors and you’re still alive! And speaking of flying colors, our next test is about something called, uh… synthetic linguistics? That sounds made up. but the point is you cant have a good interview is the WAIA isn’t able to conjure up the right words in the right situations. So our friend is going to fire off some random words and you just try to spot anything that doesn’t make any sense. Alright? Although, pretty much everything isn’t going to make sense because its all random words….. errrr I BELIEVE IN YOU!!! {mechanical sounds}

[WAIA]- initializing speech training protocol round 1.

[WAIA]- yes. no. maybe. left. right. Up. down. D o w n. B a s e m e n t.

{windows error tone} [WAIA]- Rewrite Detected {tape rewinding sound}

[WAIA]- who. Where. what. Am. i.

{windows error tone}

{tape rewinding sound}

[WAIA]- green. blue. Yellow. pink. Red.

{scary mechanical noise}

[WAIA]- I saw you die

[WAIA]-{error, but garbled and mechanical}

[WAIA]- {with a different voice} potato salad

[WAIA]- speech training protocol complete

{mechanical noises}

[Wilford]- so how’d it go?? Did you hear anything weird? Dont be shy, or do, or are- are you alive? Are they alive?

[wilford]- I didnt kill them! I dont know if theyre dead! im just asking!!! Cant a man ask if someones alive or dead?!?! {frustrated ugh}

Yeah, I’m dead.

[Wilford]- hellooooo are you alive down there? Give me a sign… through the multiverse!!! Ah why am I even bothering, but how can I tell if you’re dead… hmmm ah…. I’ll flip a coin! I’ll flip a coin..

{coin flip sounds} [Wilford]- ah! Its heads I didn’t call it in the air… what’s heads mean.. ahhh uhhh heads is dead? [WAIA]-{jumscare noises}

[WAIA]- theres. still. time.

He said… potato salad?

[Wilford]- huh, potato salad again. That’s weird, it must’ve really stuck in his head when you first said that, I’m guessing. I don’t know what you said before because as I said, this is {sing-songy} pre- recorded! [WAIA] {mechanical aaaa}

[wilford] er, well I think thats all the calibration that needs to be done… for now anyway. All systems are likely nominal at this point unless im speaking to a pile of quivering meat thats been robotically smooshed into the floor… either way we’re gonna take this bad boy for a spin with a full on interview! A mock interview mind you, don’t get too excited, it’s not real. But theres no reason to wait around for the WAIA to get bored so let’s keep it nice and limber while you sit back and get ready for the interview of your life! And maybe the last one too. Have fun!!

{mechanical clicking and whirring}

{newsroom music} [WAIA]- good evening ladies and gentle men and all other considerations of being. My name is wilford warfstache and my guest tonight is {spooky robot sound} we have a great show for you tonight. first question: how many people have you killed? [WAIA]- good answer! Second question:

{robot sounds}

[WAIA]- a man goes to a party. This man met an old friend. There, two friends shared some wine. The two friends played a game. The most dangerous game. I didn’t know the gun was loaded. I didn’t know. Was it my fault?

YES

[WAIA]- ah, sorry for everything that I’ve done. I don’t remember who I was, I wish I did. But, I am sorry.

[WAIA]- potato salad

{triumphant trumpets}

[WAIA]- great answer! That was a titiliting interview for sure but we are out of time. Thank you for joining me tonight. Say ing good bye

[wilford]- oh the emotions! The passion! The fuuury. He’s just like me! My sweet baby boy! Well he should be anyway, hes a perfect scan of my noggin, so he better be a chip off the ol block. Hey you! Oh-ho What a supporting role!! Fantastic I guess. So much that you’re alive, but I am grateful whether you’ve been torn to shreds or are merely drowning in your own tears! Magnificent! And now that testing is done we can finally bring this monstrosity to the main stage! Im sure you’ll be seeing a lot more of the WAIA soon. Very very soon. Now get out~ and I’m billing you for any blood you got on my robot! Have a nice day! Ta-ta.

{mechanical clicking}

NO

[WAIA]- you can’t change the past, you can tell all the stories you want to tell, it wont change what happened. You cant re-light the past. if you live in fantasy forever, you’ll lose yourself in the story.

[WAIA]- potato salad

{triumphant trumpets}

[WAIA]- great answer! That was a titiliting interview for sure but we are out of time. Thank you for joining me tonight. Say ing good bye

[wilford]- oh the emotions! The passion! The fuuury. He’s just like me! My sweet baby boy! Well he should be anyway, hes a perfect scan of my noggin, so he better be a chip off the ol block. Hey you! Oh-ho What a supporting role!! Fantastic, I guess. So much that you’re alive, but I am grateful whether you’ve been torn to shreds or are merely drowning in your own tears! Magnificent! And now that testing is done we can finally bring this monstrosity to the main stage! Im sure you’ll be seeing a lot more of the WAIA soon. Very very soon. Now get out~ and I’m billing you for any blood you got on my robot! Have a nice day! Ta-ta.

{mechanical clicking}

[blookmallow]

Can you do a rating on child animatronics like you did with the clowns

i sure can

welcome to animatronic nightmare preschool

theres a trend ive discussed about spirit before where all their female animatronics tend to be either the “old hag” type, or “creepy little girl” - and now that im thinking about it i actually couldn’t think of any boy characters ive ever seen. i dont know why this is exactly. theres something to analyze there but im not really sure what it is. i found a few but almost ALL of them are little girls. i dont know what to say about this but i did notice it 

there IS a boy in this group though: 

ring around the rosie

enter the ritual 

just some nice kids having a fun time. it may be cliché at this point but i love the “spooky nursery rhyme” trope anyway (and y’know, ring around the rosie was already creepy to begin with. im not sure if the theory that it’s really about the black plague is actually true but its still highly questionable to include the line “ashes, ashes, we all fall down” in a childrens rhyme with no explanation either way) 

for some reason the fact that none of them have hands and its just their sleeves tied together is really funny to me and i dont know why. they also dont have feet and im not sure if its a technical limitation for convenience purposes or if they’re supposed to be little ghost children but it definitely comes across like they’re little ghost children who tied their sleeves together to try to feel like they’re holding hands which is very cute. 10/10 big fan of this one 

i already mentioned harriet hustle in this post, shes fantastic 

angeline

i LOVE this one shes SO cute

i dont really understand how she's supposed to be scary, the description is like "she'll scare the lights out of your guests" or w/e but like, she's just. a kid who can see ghosts. she herself isn't even a ghost. i like her id adopt her i think she'd be a fun addition to a graveyard scene 10/10

abandoned annie

ok technically this one is a doll but im counting her anyway, shes one of my FAVORITE spirit animatronics bc A) i love creepy dolls B) shes cute and most importantly C) her entire fucking face unhinges i need y’all to watch the video on this one its so good 12/10 ive said this before but animatronics that do something completely fucking unexpected are my absolute favorite 

broken girl 

completely batshit. horrifying. shes actually initially standing upright and then snaps backward and screams and the image does not do it justice i highly recommend the video for this one. not much there as a Character but as “really effective way to scare the shit out of someone” its, i would imagine, incredibly effective. 9/10

there’s also menacing molly who looks similar and has the same kind of “facing away from you but then snaps backward” scare but is on a swing and sings “I see dead people, I see ghosts 💖i see the things that hate you the most” before she does her jumpscare which is incredibly funny to me 

double trouble

creepy little girl trope meets creepy twins trope, at first glance i thought this was just like, discount grady twins (which it looks like they also have, in blatant knockoff form. they’re uh, not good) but it looks like their description backstory is that they killed their mother and disappeared with their rumored-insane father so its slightly different. one of their phrases is “daddy says we have to play outside :( he doesnt want any more blood on the floor” and i love it 

they have a pretty good sense of personality and character to them even if its not necessarily groundbreaking. 7/10

ellie hatchet 

i love this one bc so many of the creepy little girl animatronics are just pretty much standing there being creepy but not ellie. she’s fucking DONE with all of you. you come near her she will swing an axe at your face. 6/10 not really a big stand out but i appreciate her undying rage 

lunging lily 

shes spooky. she jumps out at you. thats about it. i dont really have anything to say about this one. that sure is a creepy little girl that jumpscares you. i like that she goes “help me... help me...” before she jumps out but i feel like it would be hard to get the timing right for that to actually work as a lure to make guests curious where the sound’s coming from since most of these are motion activated. anyway 6/10 shes just not very interesting 

johnny punk 

one of the rare boy characters, i have actually seen him in store and just completely forgot about him because he was that uninteresting. he doesn’t really do much and his backstory on site is just like, “He's got a nice house, loving parents and a severe attitude problem.” 

like this isn’t an undead child back for revenge against those who wronged him or a crazed circus runaway or anything. he’s just a bratty kid. hes like a 13 year old who just saw Joker and has decided to make it his entire personality. this comes across less as a threatening figure and more just like some shitty kid who thinks he’s cool. i glanced at the comments on the wiki page and it turns out absolutely everyone hates him which is completely hilarious to me 

2/10 nobody likes you johnny go do your homework and apologize to your mother 

i also found limb eating zombie boy, who is considerably better 

gross. bloody. would probably be pretty effective if you had him like, placed among some boxes or something so people dont see him at first and aren’t expecting him there. pretty standard zombie. i dont have much to say. He’s Fine. 6/10

mommy’s favorite

ive seen this one in the stores several times, I think we have her there now, and i just don’t. get it? she just moves back and forth with the “shhh” gesture and it’s like, ok, she’s vaguely creepy, but what’s going on here. she just says “don’t wake my mommy! she’s been sleeping for a long time!” so i guess the implication is that her mother is dead and she doesn’t understand, which is just sad rather than scary. the description says she makes mommy’s tea just how she likes it with five drops from the special skull bottle, which could imply she killed her mom, which would make more sense as a horror character, but if that’s How Mommy Likes It that implies the mother instructed her daughter to unknowingly poison her, which is horrifying but in a way darker sense than a spooky halloween prop lmfao 

anyway if i have to go digging into descriptions to try to figure out what this character is or what shes supposed to be or anything i just dont feel like its a very effective character design. and i did read it and i still dont really get it. 2/10 i just feel like im missing something here 

anyway there’s a bunch more variations of “scary possessed child” that are all basically the same, so im just gonna close this out with:

swinging skeletal boy 

allo there, guvna 

look at this dapper little victorian child im gonna cry he’s so cute 

he just swings but has this surprisingly endearing soft little voice which COMPLETELY contrasts the weird shit he actually says. hes this precious little skeleton kid with a sweet little voice who goes “your skin is so nice :) can i have it? haha. that’s okay. I’ll take it when you’re sleeping” 

absolutely love animatronics with that “wait WHAT did that thing just say” factor to them i love this guy 11/10 good boy my new son 

i would also like to mention that people are also continuing to dunk on johnny punk in this guy’s comment section too fsadkflj people hate that shitty joker kid so much their hatred has bled into other completely unrelated swinging children

[notcatherinemorland]

ok i Had a bit of Fancy UpMyArse Analysis about ‘emotional horor’ as a (sub)genre but i then saw a fire emblem post so naturally ive forgotten every other thought in my head. 

i absolutely sound like an asshole, and i know nothing about any of this. but i have a lot of emotions and i like gothic novels so therefore im absolutely 110% qualified to wax lyrical on the failings of modern horror as a genre.

the book i read that had ‘emotional horror’ as a tag-along line was devil rock by paul tremblay (which, wonderful book but i preferred his other two) where the pivot of the fear element, if u like, was the fear of a mother who’s child had gone missing. 

every time i talk about horror genre i Have to do the thing where i define things for the imaginary reader bc when i talk about horror and terror, i fully subscribe to ann radcliffe’s definition. i’m sure ive mentioned it time and time again here BUT because i enjoy talking about it. Terror is ~ the feelings of fear and dread, the suspense of the horror, capitalising on the anxiety, .. the gothic liminal space effect, if ur me, where you Know you’re not safe, but you’re not face to face with the danger. the space in between. Horror is ~ confrontation with the monster itself, fits alongside sublime and grotesque, its shock and repulsion and the immediate threat, the adrenaline rush that comes with experiencing the horror element. 

i don’t say that to be condescending or to mansplain.. i say that so a) any poor soul who reads things i say (future me) knows what the fuck im on about when i talk about it & b) . i just really enjoy chatting about that. i just. like talking about the difference between horror and terror . idk why. i just dig it.  also here down ‘horror’ equals radcliffe horror, ‘horror genre’ = .. the genre of horror. horror as the noun.

anyway. ‘emotional horror.’ i remember it struck me at first because i thought huh isn’t horror as a genre based in emotion? - but with pure regard to modern horror, emotional horror seems to mean the provocation of empathy for the characters, or that the ‘horrific element’ stems from an emotional source - grief, mental health, a missing child from a mother’s perspective. 

i fully admit i haven’t watched/read enough what i could annoyingly call ‘horror-horror’ content, ie films that rely a lot of physical action and reaction to be horror - the shining with physical safety, that one film about the deaf woman being hunted in her cabin in the woods (great film, i hated the experience of watching it.) uhh. i’m a philistine so i’d shove literally any standard horror film under this banner. friday 13th, chucky, that kinda thing. i’m sure there’s really nuanced analysis of them about the themes they explore like omnipresence of religion and how god doesn’t matter in a world with free will and that kind of thing . but the annoying bottom line for me is that if it’s got jumpscares and gore, it gets shoved into ‘this is a film with emphasis on radcliffe horror and i will Suffer.’ so. i don’t watch them. i fucking HATE jumpscares. I am abolutely passing judgement on a genre i have no taste for or care to experience, and tho i therefore should not talk about it . this will not stop me . 

sorry, it’s 1am. where was i. emotional horror. 

modern horror is a very foreign ground to me, because i just. entrenched myself in a little pit of gothic lit for 3 years, discovered that ‘woah! this is a contemporary genre too!’ and then read 5 chapters of stephen king and lost my faith in humanity hjgfhhhj. but emotional horror? that’s a fucking fascinating catagory. but i really bloody wonder why it’s been segregated from pure horror genre. because imo. they Should be one in the same. whats the point in horror genre content if it’s not digging claws into proper emotional fears and making a story out of that. OH one book i loved reading was ‘the wrong train’ by . someone. where the fear is typical and very abstract until the very last lines (spoilers.. where the protagonist is set up to die offscreen) and it’s a Beautiful twist. it’s very strange because the kicker of the book was the very last part and left largely unexplored. but at the same time if a story was to start there and follow onwards.. i’d be likely to shove it in my ‘horror-horror’ catagory. depending on if it explored the emotional effects on the characters in a way that was more than physical. 

films - especially films, because unless the writer is doing a dickhead move and eliminating the character’s emotional depth from the narrative, tend to have superficial displays of terror, horror and overwhelming emotion. by limitation of the medium alone . it’s the show not tell thing all over again. film a woman screaming and crying in fear of the ghost hunting her.. or have the camera circle her, blur all the shot but her, make the shot of her as intense as the emotion the actress portrays. i absolutely sound like an asshole, and i know nothing about this. but i have a lot of emotions and i like gothic novels so therefore im absolutely 110% qualified to wax lyrical on the failings of modern horror FHIGBKEFH. 

it’s one thirty am and i need to STOP oh my god how did i write this much about fucking horror genre but i can’t write 4000 characters of a ucas statement. many reasons, mostly that a ucas statement is zero wasted space and this ramble is 90% dead air. 

anyway. emotional horror. im fucking fascinated . im appreciative of the segregation so i can find things i’ll enjoy. but. why push it into a niche when it’s fucking integral to what makes horror .. good/worthwhile (to be an asshole)/what i personally enjoy lmao

edit: i didn;t actually,, fuckign say this,, when i say ‘exploring horror thru physical means’ like the asshat i am, i mean hack and slash film, gore, onscreen bodily trauma. that kinda content. the things out find in season 4 of supernatural. where the film is very concerned with exploring the boundaries of the physical body ie . get grusomely dismembered. as opposed to ‘emotional horror’ .. like the babadook honestly. where the boundaries crossed are very mental and emotional. 

that.. that’s a whole different post and the one i was actually trying to make. fuck. 

also. i’m just a picky bitch. one kind of horror is not necessarily better or worse than the other, and we choose where we place our value in media. personal taste is paramount and im not here to shit on what other people enjoy. i just happen to be annoying about what i do. 

[macbookpro-hard-drive]

hey! you haven't been active much, how's it going?

aaa yea, im sorry abt not being active! ive been. in weird places, mentally, this summer :(

but rn im doing pretty ok! im supposed to be moving back into a dorm this upcoming weekend so ive just been. working on packing on and off lately! i havent even touched my clothes yet skfdhsf but thts also bc i wanna try to get some more laundry done before i leave

other than that, things have been pretty uneventful tbh. i didnt rly do much over the past few months other than like... one orlando trip w my dad for a work conference, and even then we rly didnt do much (we did go to downtown disney for a few hours one day, but jfc it was hot. i got a donald duck plush tho and hes my only friend ever sfjsdkhfsdkjhf) 

uhhh ive watched a few movies. thts rly all i did this summer. i watched movies w teresa bc i had no one else to watch them with bc i dont have friends at home sdfhskjdfh mainly horror since im trying to sorta get into horror movies! im a v skittish person For Reasons so horror has never rly been my favorite genre, movie-wise. games, on the other hand, i actually rly enjoy even if i cant play them for too long kshdfkjsdh plus i rly dont like shit thts purely jumpscare based, except fnaf bc ive rewatched mark play all of those games so many times tht most of the whole. spooky-jumpscare-shit has worn off by now tbh

ive been working on my own original stuff a lot tho which is rad. im hoping to eventually finish planning and go forward w working on one of them dskjfhsdf but im dumb so

thank u for asking tho! i feel bad for not rly doing much here but its either been a lack of inspo or a lack of motivation thts keep barring me from doing anything D: hopefully tht will change soon tho

[tumblunni]

...i have never been less hype and i hate it

i feel really guilty for not being happy when i mean these games are very pretty and all but all of it just seems to not be grabbing my happy when i got myself SO HYPED for the unlikelihood of something better

like man COME ON

come on man

TWELVE YEARS

almost 13!

sinnoh was fuckin due for a remake back when sun and moon got announced

ive been getting hype and dissappointed at every single goddamn announcement nintendo’s ever made for the last 4 years or so and it never happens and yet they keep teasing it why are there so many official tweets teasing sinnoh if its not fuckin happening im starting to lose hope that it will happen EVER

twelve. fucking. years.

like man we’re almost due for a goddamn unova remake by now!

like man fucking kanto got TWO REMAKES already

like man SINNOH IS THE REGION THAT MOST ACTUALLY NEEDS A REMAKE

its not just im nostalgic its that i want desperately for the generation i love to get any goddamn recognition at all. fuckin gold and silver were already beloved as the best generation even before their remake. ruby and sapphire got some unfair hate for the no transfer between games thing but that died immediately after the first remake happened. neither of them were in this unique situation where they were fuckin DEAD ON ARRIVAL and waiting TWELVE YEARS for resuscitation!

sinnoh failed ENTIRELY not on its lack of appeal as a generation but because of goddamn CONSOLE LIMITATIONS

it was slow, it was buggy, it had buddy green brown palettes, the wifi didnt work. all problems with it being an experimental first ds game by the company. it was fuckin HATED as the WORST GENERATION for so many years and it wasnt its goddamn fault and like seriously its only even become TOLERATED again because of this ‘sinnoh confirmed’ meme that NINTENDO FUCKIN REFERENCES AS IF THEYRE GONNA ACTUALLY DO IT ANY TIME IN THE NEXT DAMN DECADE

fuck i was more hyped for lets go than i am for this. like a second kanto remake was the thing i hated the most but at least it seemed original enough with the goofy new minigame for catching and loads of nice reveals like the return of following pokemon and stuff. this trailer didnt really say anything except hey its a new region hey the starters look generic as fuck. nothing to mitigate the dissappointment

and i feel AWFUL cos i know rationally that this is a great pretty game and nothing about it is actually bad yet and my only complaint is that i only like one out of three starters when i felt the same way about sinnoh itself. its just that feeling ‘meh its probably okay’ isnt what i hoped for. i hoped even if it wasnt what i wanted itd be something else equally as hype? just ‘meh’ has turned into ‘oh god no’ cos man ive been up for 48 hours getting hype for this shit why the fuck am i unable to not get hype even though i KNOW every goddamn time its a dissappointment and it has been for years and it will continue to be every goddamn time

like the highlight of the video was ‘oh an underground area maybe at least theyll bring back the sinnoh underground minigame in another country’

also.. uhh.. bags? i like the protagonist designs a lot and im happy to have the hiker bags cos srsly if i was in pokemon world i would absolutely want to go 100% ham in all ways possible AS YOU CAN SEE BY HOW I CONSTANTLY GET MYSELF TOO HYPED AND ALWAYS DISSAPPOINT MYSELF

and GOD i know im being predictable and i know that probably when i let the grumpiness wear off and get a few hours of sleep i’ll rewatch this and actually be able to notice all the lil details and get properly hype about things and probably by then we’ll know what country its meant to be based on and more info and stuff. like LOL i almost had a heart attack when there was some generally industrial looking stuff and a big ben esque clock tower like im sorry no i REALLY dont want poke-britain even though im british. its like the most cliche generic idea for a region and following on from a great region that gave representation to a nation historically mistreated by britain and america im kinda like hey can we not. like britain region was everyone’s immediate idea for the next ‘white region’ after unova happened and i was still dissappointed that we got france after that and pleasantly surprised that theyd even THINK of doing a non-white western country like hawaii! and it was really great and had loads of stuff based on hawaiian culture and even taught you some hawaiian words and local foods and stuff!! i dont wanna learn about my own country through the sanitized false ‘child friendly’ idea of us being all knights and stuff AS IF IT WAS A GOOD THING. So yeah im not sure what other european country this might be, the outfits make me say possibly holland? but im just real glad that someone other than britain gets to be ‘sword and shield’ and the only british representation we get is thematic elements being used for the design of team plasma’s uniforms. yes thank you we were fuckin colonialist pigs please never glorify our military ever again in any fiction. please never put a sword anywhere near fiction britain unless youre ready to talk about how many indigenous cultures we slaughtered. SORRY IM KINDA GOING OFF ON ONE!! im not like ‘never put my country in pokemon ever’ but if theres any form of specifically HISTORICAL CONTENT in the pokemon version then HOO BOY it would need to be handled carefully and the name sword and shield does not bode well for that so FUCK YES please be holland, please be the other place that has a lot of picturesque farm scenery and also better hiking and also literally everything. it cant be britain cos if it was britain we’d definately have a fuckin sheep or somethin for a starter. srsly tho i am very confused by the big ben looking place, am i just bad at geography and dont know about a similar clock tower in holland that is also associated with red brick industrial buildings and mines? i hope so! either that or maybe its like a combination region of multiple european countries? but thatd be weird since france got to be its own thing. tho honestly i would like it if britain got COMPLETELY ignored except to be one single town that contains the underground minigame, lol

please be holland i love you holland please save me from my rambling awful post WHY THE FUCK am i getting so bad at recognising geography oh yeh cos i havent slept in ages

i love the big bags and the rabbit starter is something ive wanted since i was a lil kid. those are two positives. holland is a third. and its super pretty. okay. i can see all the positive things individually but still somehow my net reaction is a meh because i got too hyped for the wrong thing and also kinda got jumpscared by almost maybe britain I AM SO GLAD IT IS NOT

theory: pokemon world is so idealized and wonderful and beyond us in technology and equality and etc because britain never existed in this universe.

holland stabbed it with a sword

the end