#jaida essence hall/jan sport

[swallowedswan]

my goal is to finish season 6 of the l word and then i will be nothing

[ateneablack21]

Drag me to my grave (By Atenea_Black and Valeriiia_RG in A03): Chapter 1

After some technical malfunctions in the Season 12 Reunion set happen and delay filming, Jaida, Gigi, Jackie, Crystal, Heidi, Nicky and Jan stay in the building while the other queens go outside to grab a coffee and explore the city. But, unfortunately, that ends up being the worst decision of their lives when an attacker starts trying to hunt them down one by one. Will they be able to survive this massacre?

Well, it all depends on the choice you make! After every chapter readers will have to vote for two options that can save or condemn one of the queens lives.

So, what are you going to choose?

——————————————————————————————————

Chapter 1: Voting closed:

Summary:

Jaida, Gigi, Heidi, Jackie, Jan, Crystal and Nicky stay behind in the filming location of the S12 reunion after some technical problems.

Notes:

Hiiii! Before you start reading this we wanted to explain the dynamic of this book The dynamic of this book is different to the one of a normal book as when each chapter ends we will be giving you two options to vote in the comments for (you have to say which you prefer) which will determine the fate of the characters (if they will end up surviving or dying).

Every chapter there will be a decision to make and you’ll be given between 48 and 72 hours after the chapter is published to make the vote. After that, we will close the voting and write the next chapter with the decision that you guys took.

You can only vote one time per chapter, so please don’t comment your vote more than one time. Feel free to ask any questions you need or to comment what your thoughts and theories are as well!!

We wanted to give some credits to the fic “Seven Little Queens” by Aphistas (in A03) as we took the idea of the dynamic of the book from them. If you like this kind of stories we really recommend you read this one, plus it’s also from the Drag Race fandom, featuring Bianca, Courtney Act, Adore, Trixie, Katya, Pearl, and Violet Chatcki as the protagonist of the story.

With all that being said, hope you enjoy!

————————

When they applied to Drag Race, they all knew it was going to be a life-changing experience. What they didn’t expect though, was that that life-changing experience was going to bring a worst one with it. And if they had known that before-hand… They would have never applied in the first place.

(…)

Season 12 of RuPaul’s Drag Race was at its end, and all the queens of the season had come together for one of the last times for the Reunion. The season's twelve contestants had been in touch since they finished filming everything, not including the finale, and were excited to see each other again. They may have fought, but they liked one another just the same and had ended up forming a beautiful friendship with each other.

When they saw each other they all hugged or exchanged greetings, talking about how their lives had changed since they had last seen each other. They had already talked about it over the WhatsApp group, but, it was better to talk about it in person as well.

Upon arrival, the producers gathered them all together, informing them that there had been some problems and that they would have to delay filming for a couple of hours. They told them that one of the main cameras had stopped working and that they had to leave the studio to go to were they kept the other cameras, which could take a while. They were free to stay in the studio if they liked or go outside to visit the city, they just had to be back in 2 hours.

Brita, Aiden, Dahlia, Rock and Widow decided to go to a nearby café together while the rest of them decided to stay and make sure that they were ready for the filming of the reunion. In a room near the recording room, there were 4 tables where they could leave their things according to the producers, so the seven remaining queens walked there, talking the whole way. Nicky, Jaida, Gigi and Crystal took the table closest to the door, while Jackie, Jan and Heidi placed their things on the adjacent table.

It wasn’t long before Jan excused herself to go to the bathroom, saying that she was going to take advantage of the free time they had to fix some of her makeup, the rest continuing with their conversation as she left the room.

“So… Are you excited for the finale?” Jackie asked the top three.

“To be honest, I thought I would be nervous, but I’m just eager.” Gigi answered, taking out a small bag containing the makeup she might need to touch up and leaving it on the table.

“I'm pretty confident. After all the work I've put into the lipsync I'm sure it's going to turn out great.” Jaida said while she fixed the position of her wig as it had moved slightly during her journey to the filming location.

“Yeah. It’s exciting to think that in no time one of us will be crowned as the winner.” Crystal talked, moving seats so she could seat closer to the rest of the queens.”

“I a-“ Heidi started to say, shutting up suddenly and starting to look around, making the rest worry.

“Hey, are you okay?” Nicky questioned as she placed a hand on the other’s shoulder.

“I- I thought I had heard something…”

"It's probably just the strain of the journey here taking a toll on you, don't worry.” The French queen reassured, squeezing Heidi’s shoulder lightly to try to soothe her friend.

The future Miss Congeniality nodded a little more calm, all of them resuming their conversation about the finale and what they expected from it.

(…)

Jan had found the bathroom rather quickly, even though it was a bit far from the room where she was before, her fast pace had allowed her to get there sooner.

The bathroom was rather big, with a giant mirror, 8 stalls and 5 hand washing basins. Wanting to go back to the other room as soon as possible, as she didn’t want to miss any important conversations, she quickly took out the makeup out of her bag, starting to fix the little errors she hadn’t been able to fix back in the hotel before coming here.

She was finishing up when, suddenly, the lights went out, leaving her in almost darkness, the only thing illuminating the room being the emergency lights that flickered every few seconds.

"The producers are going to be pissed." The queen said under her breath, chuckling slightly as she imagined the faces of the producers when they knew they had to fix another problem before they could shoot the reunion.

Having left her mobile phone with the rest of her things in the room where her sisters were, the one with the blonde wig started walking towards the exit of the bathroom in the dark, taking care not to bump into anything as she made her way out. She left her makeup there, intending to fetch her mobile phone to put the lantern feature on and continue touching up her makeup.

While this happened, the lights where the other six queens were also turned off, everyone looking at each other, as much as the emergency lights let them, the confusion clear in their faces. How did the producers find such a shitty place to film? Even the emergency lights didn’t work correctly, flickering and basically leaving them more time in the dark than the time they could see their surroundings.

“I’m gonna call Jan, check if the lights in the bathroom also went out.” Jackie informed, taking out her phone and marking her fellow queen’s number, only to realise that the other had left her mobile in the room.

"I'm sure she'll be back soon, you can ask her then." Gigi said, walking to where the door was so she was able to see when the other queen came back.

Meanwhile, Jan found herself doing just what Goode had said, finally out of the bathroom and starting to walk down a corridor. 

Suddenly, the queen heard a sound behind her, swiftly turning around to try and locate the source of the sound. She looked around her, the only thing in sight being a nearby plant. After spending a few more seconds searching for the source of the disturbing sound, Jan finally gave up, trying to convince herself that it had been just a figment from her imagination, turning around again to head back to where the other queens were.

“It was nothing, I just imagined it, I’m sure” she whispered to herself as she started walking again.

The queen continued her journey, taking deep breaths to try to calm her growing nerves: It had only been her imagination, so she had nothing to worry about. After all, she-

Jan cried out in agony, feeling a sudden sharp pain in her back and fell to the ground. The pain she was feeling was like nothing she had ever felt before, the sensation making desperate screams come out of her mouth without her permission.

Her screams were so loud that they reached the other side of the building, where the other queens were. They looked at each other with fear and concern before quickly following the desperate screams, worried about their fellow friend. They would have liked to try to believe that it was just their imagination, but, unfortunately, they could clearly recognise Jan by her screams.

Without turning her body around, Jan looked backwards, suppressing a sob when she saw a big black-haired man with a sickly grin holding a bloody knife behind her, the queen quickly realising that the blood in that knife was hers. The one with the blonde wig couldn't stop the tears starting to fall down her face, her make-up smearing. The man laughed as he watched the queen begin to cry, advancing towards her as she tried to crawl away from him.

“Help!” She screamed at the top of her lungs.

“Nobody’s going to help you, little bitch. I’m going to end you, and as soon as I do that, I’ll end your stupid friends too… One by one. And nobody is going to be able to stop me.”

“Please…” Jan pleaded “I’ll do whatever you want but please don’t kill me.”

“Oh, but killing you is all I want, darling.” He laughed “There’s no stoping this.”

The attacker raised his arm, preparing to deliver a fatal stab in Jan's back...

Option 1: Jan crawls away from the attacker.

Option 2: Jan turns around to face the attacker and defends herself.

————————

Final notes:

We hope you liked it!! 🥰🥰🥰

What did you think? Tell us all about in the comments!!

Remember to vote for the option you think is best for Jan’s survival! (Just say something like “I vote for Option 1” or “I choose Option 2” with the choice you think will be the best!)

Happy Pride Month!! 🏳️‍🌈

[puppywritesthings]

s12 but as unhinged glee moments

don’t call it a comeback.

dahlia sin: finn singing “you’re having my baby” to his then girlfriend even though that was not, in fact, his baby (it’s not like he knew that at the time though)

rock m sakura: when tina hit her head on a fountain and part of that episode becomes a body swap episode

nicky doll: sue sylvester marrying herself

aiden zhane: when sue locked up klaine in an elevator to kiss as a saw trap

brita: the acafellas performing boyz 2 men’s “i wanna s*x you up” at a parent-teacher conference

jan: “well, i didn’t mean to send her to an ACTIVE crack house.”

widow von du: sue sylvester recreating the music video for madonna’s “vogue”

heidi n closet: mercedes protesting the removal of tater tots in the cafeteria

jackie cox: all of “let’s have a kiki/turkey turkey time”

crystal methyd: the nyada acapella group doing a cover of somebody else’s cover of “baby got back” and fox getting a lawsuit

gigi goode:  the very concept of fondue for two

jaida essense hall: vocal adrenaline performing “bohemian rhapsody” interspersed with footage of quinn giving birth

[strutterbetty]

Reunion :)) (minus Jaida 💔)

[fuckyeah-dragrace]

mini fic!

so I’m almost done with the hytesdoll fic but i don’t wanna reveal anything else but here’s a little bonus scene that’s happening simultaneously 🥰

——

“Nicky’s back?” Jaida beamed from ear to ear. “I missed her so much! Where is she?” She whipped her head side to side and was ready to dart down the halls of the office building before Vanessa stood in front of her, blocking the doorway.

“Oh hell naw, Ms Hall. We have a plan, remember?” She looked at her expectantly. The younger woman had a puzzled expression on her face, shaking her head at her.

“Plan? What plan?”

“The plan to get those two idiots to admit their feelings to each other! You know, the one the whole damn office has been planning for months?”

“Ohhh, that plan!” Jaida nodded, now remembering what they were supposed to do.

“Got it, now what do we gotta do?”

“Jackie already scheduled them to have meetings at the same times so they’d need to take the elevator. Kameron did some mechanic thingy to have the elevator stop and then we just gotta wait for the magic to happen.” Vanjie listed, for once in her life being organized and ready with a plan and a wide grin on her face.

Jaida nodded and looked down at her phone, her Lock Screen flashing a picture of her and Nicky smiling at one of their old photo shoots from way back when. “You really think this is gonna work? Brookes been so pissed off because of her and putting them alone in a small space… that sounds like a death sentence for them both.”

The Latina rolled her eyes with laugh. “Baby you don’t know Brooke like I do. This is exactly what she needs. She been dancing around that damn Frenchie since she got here day one. She’s gotta face the music and dance already.”

They quieted in an instant as Brooke walked past the conference room, looking down at her phone. They watched her, Vanjie peeking her head out and watching her head down the hall towards the elevator and walking inside.

“Nicky was in that one.” Jaida whisper screams excitedly, a text from Jan coming in on her phone. They cheered and high fived each other.

“Did it work?” Asia and Jackie came in, hearing the excitement.

“Hell yeah it did!” Jaida hugged Jackie close. “We’re matchmaking geniuses!”

“Now we gotta wait. I got the text from Brooke saying they’re stuck.” Kameron said, coming with a wide grin. “Is it bad that we’re enjoying locking our bosses together in an elevator?”

“No.” Everyone said unanimously.

“We’re helping them. They’ll thank us later.” Jan grinned, sitting next to Jackie on a sofa.

“Or skin is alive.” Yvie muttered. Asia nudged her shoulder. “What? It’s a really possibility.”

Vanjie rolled her eyes. “We know those two like each other so we’re just giving them a helpful push. All we gotta do now is wait.” Everyone agreed, smiling and chatting to each other about what could happen.

“Yeah and see who kills who first.”

“Yvie!”

“What?!”

[sexynetra]

i’m sorry to hear you have covid :( i hope you feel better soon!!! <3

as requested :) and i snuck in crystal for self indulgence reasons hope that’s ok <3 love u

I will never ever turn down a crystal shes such a cutie patootie I love her 😭

They’re all so wonderful I will cherish these photos they will heal me thank you Angel I love you too <3

[purplejan]

your fic recs. hand em over /lh (no smut pls !!)

waaa this ask got me so excited!! hope u find something to enjoy here 💕 some of my faves that immediately came to mind and/or i had saved in my bookmarks:

love, love, go ahead and have another plate of it, it doesn't run out - multi ship but mainly jan sport/jackie cox, jaida essence hall/nicky doll and lemon/priyanka (by @sweetlikesunflowersandhoney)

i'm going to build us a table - lemon/priyanka (by @sweetlikesunflowersandhoney)

crush phase - jaida essence hall/jan sport (by @uwusunflower)

you and I were fireworks - icesis couture/pythia

the only exception - icesis couture/pythia (both by @hannahlovesdance07 )

i wanna ruin our friendship (we should be lovers instead) - icesis couture/pythia (by @stillgoode /goodeforyou in ao3)

single mom au - jasmine kennedie/daya betty (by @fuckyeah-dragrace )

academia au - multi ship: jan/jackie/nicky , denali/rosé, gigi/crystal (by @sweetestberryofthebunch)

neighbors au - pythia/icesis couture. (by @goodemethyd)

blossoming - jackie cox/jan sport (by @junosjukebox)

[foxynali]

☾ stan list ☽

K-POP:

boy groups:

(ult) exo. biases: xiumin, chanyeol, d.o, baekhyun.

vixx. biases: leo, hyuk

shinee. bias: onew.

seventeen. biases: hoshi, dino, jeonghan.

support list: nu'est, ateez, txt, b.a.p, infinite, teen top, dawn, mblaq.

girl groups:

(ult) snsd. bias: tiffany.

(ult) twice. biases: nayeon, momo.

stayc. biases: isa.

everglow. biases: yiren, aisha.

blackpink. biases: ot4.

kim hyuna, soloist.

aespa. bias: giselle

support list: apink, f(x), sunmi, suhyun (akmu), dreamcatcher, oh my girl, (g)-idle, momoland, girl's day, jeon somi, mamamoo, ailee, yena, le sserafim, ive.

DRAG: 

i have not watched: down under, canada’s drag race s2, drag race holland, drag race italia,  drag race thailand, españa’s drag race s2.

usa:  tatianna, jujubee, kylie sonique love, raja, manila, jinkx monsoon, detox, bendelacreme, miss fame, katya, trixie mattel, bob the drag queen, kim chi, shea coulée, aquaria, yuhua hamasaki, blair st. clair, miz cracker, monet x change, asia o'hara, mo heart, vanessa vanjie mateo, ra'jah o'hara, scarlet envy, nina west, jaida essence hall, gigi goode, jackie cox, nicky doll, heidi n closet, symone, denali, gottmik, bosco, daya betty, willow pill.

canada: priyanka, kiara, lemon, boa, juice boxx, tynomi banks.

uk: blu hydrangea, baga chipz, divina de campo, cheryl hole, bimini bon boulash, tayce, tia kofi, lawrence chaney, ellie diamond, victoria scone.

españa: the entire s1 cast except for dovima nurmi, but highlights are: carmen farala, killer queen, sagittaria, arantxa castilla la mancha, hugáceo crujiente.

france: soa de muse, kam hugh, la grande dame.

DRAG SHIPS: 

favorites: arantxa/hugaceo (aranceo), lemon/priyanka (lemyanka), carmen farala/sagittaria, kam hugh/la grande dame, gigi goode/nicky doll (goodedoll), gigi goode/jaida essence hall (goodessence).

like: lemon/juice boxx (lemonjuice), naomi/kim chi (naochi), bendelacreme/jinkx monsoon (jela/jinkx & dela), bendelacreme/trixie mattel. jackie cox/jan sport (jankie), jaida essence hall/nicky doll (halldoll), raja gemini/manila luzon (rajila),  scarlet envy/yvie oddly (scyvie), sasha velour/shea coulée (sashea).

i sometimes read: trixie/katya (trixya), brooke/vanjie (branjie), blu/cheryl (hole hydrangea), tayce/bimini, s6 ships, s14 ships.

[writethehousedown]

In My Head, We Belong Chapter Seven (Crystal/Gigi) -- Zyan

a/n: hi, hello, i’m sad this is coming to an end, but grateful for all the love it got. ❤ i hope you guys like this short-ish sort of epilogue. i feel like it’s fitting for the clowns 😌

“Are they always this intense when they play Uno?” Nicky wonders, pressing her cards against her chest. Gigi snickers with a shrug.

“They’re usually more violent,” she merely replies, and Nicky musters something in French.

It’s Jackie’s birthday and since it happens to also be Easter, they decided to celebrate in the restaurant. And the best part is that they didn’t even have to spend a dime on the decorations - it’s already decorated with all the flowers they compulsively bought at the fair. It’s nice, even if poor Blair is on the edge of drowning in tissues because of her allergies.

True to themselves, they decided to play Uno once dinner was over, and Jackie may or may not be regretting inviting Nicky the moment they decided to play said game.

“Jaida, honey, I don’t think you should throw that one,” Jan says, she’s sitting across Jaida’s lap, and, allegedly, helps her play; but it only causes Jaida to lose all common sense, and that results in her having half of the deck already.

“Jan, I don’t think you’re helping,” Yuhua pipes up from the other side of the table, causing the group to snicker.

Jan pouts, folding her arms, and Jaida is quick to place a kiss on Jan’s cheek.

“Don’t mind them, babe, you’re an amazing help,” she assures her and Jan smiles giddily.

Normally, Gigi would make a comment on how disgustingly sweet they are, but she’s lost her Making-Fun-Of-Jan privilege; she’s got an arm wrapped around Crystal’s waist and her chin placed on her shoulder, watching her play.

It’s been almost three weeks since they found out they both liked each other thanks to the mere flower crowns, and so far they’re happy. Really happy. It was awkward at first, getting used to each other’s random ways of showing affection after just being friends all this time.

They haven’t told the other girls yet, but it’s not as if it’s necessary. Sometimes Crystal will steal kisses from Gigi as she’s waiting for her orders, or Gigi will smile with fondness at anything Crystal says or does. It’s safe to say they’re pretty transparent about it, not even bothering to hide it.

“Nena, don’t throw that one; you got three +4, why not start a war?” Crystal whispers in her ear with a devilish smile. Gigi does as she says, because why the hell not.

So she slams a +4 and the table gasps, Nicky groans and throws a green +2. And Blair might look innocent, but all that innocence flies out of the window when she slams another +4 on the table, exclaiming ‘not this time, bitches’ with a high pitched tone. But Heidi isn’t about to pick up ten cards, so she also responds with a +4, and she gives an evil laugh as she sees Silky panic and search between her cards for anything to kill off Heidi’s.

But sadly, this time around she’s got nothing.

Silky bangs her fist onto the table with a frown.

“Crystal, you bitch, I know you told your woman to throw that +4 to get revenge,” she exclaims in an accusatory tone, prompting the whole table to erupt in laughter.

Gigi’s heart gives a jump when Silky refers to her as ‘Crystal’s woman’. They’re not official yet, but somehow the title it doesn’t bother her.

Crystal sticks her tongue out and laughs.

“Don’t look at me, it’s simply karma!” She lies seamlessly with a shrug, and Gigi snickers.

“Wait, that reminds me, haven’t I banned you from Uno?” Widow asks, throwing a red five to the pile and restarting the whole thing. Silky shrugs with a smug smile.

“Blame Miss Brianna over here, she was the one in charge of handing out the cards.” Silky points to the blonde, who cocks a sly brow.

“Bitch, I didn’t hand you anything, you took out seven cards on your own when no one was looking,” Brianna points out, and Silky folds her arms with a childish pout.

Nicky laughs wholeheartedly and elbows Jackie softly.

“You weren’t lying when you told me your coworkers take Uno very seriously,” she says with a giggle that melts Jackie’s heart.

She’s happy they haven’t scared Nicky off; Jackie truly spent days asking herself if she should invite Nicky to her birthday party, not only because she knew her coworkers, but also because they’ve been fooling around for a short time and she didn’t want to give out any wrong ideas to Nicky.

The environment is nice, even though every once in a while they go on another screaming match because someone throws a +2 or a +4, thus starting the war all over again. Gigi only watches everything go down as she snuggles against Crystal.

The evening goes by in the blink of an eye; at some point they grew tired of playing Uno, so they just decided to tell embarrassing stories about past gatherings or weird things that happened during their shifts. And even though most of them try to embarrass Jackie in front of Nicky, it only causes the French woman to grow closer with her, and Jackie can’t believe someone finds it cute that one time they went clubbing and at 3 a.m. she willingly locked herself in a stall, because on the other side of the world there was a figure skating competition and, for once, Jackie had found a place to watch it live beforehand.

When the party’s over, everyone gives Jackie a hug before heading home, and even though Dusty offers to drop them off, Crystal and Gigi reject her offer, preferring to just walk to Gigi’s apartment with their hands linked.

As Crystal and Gigi fall into the latter’s bed, Crystal wearing a worn-out oversized shirt Gigi stole from her brother years ago, Gigi thinks gifting Crystal the flower crown was probably one of her best ideas so far.

[dragracecentral]

My favorite runway: Black Wedding [ Season 12 ]

[ateneablack21]

Drag me to my grave (By Atenea_Black and Valeriiia_RG in A03): Chapter 2

After some technical malfunctions in the Season 12 Reunion set happen and delay filming, Jaida, Gigi, Jackie, Crystal, Heidi, Nicky and Jan stay in the building while the other queens go outside to grab a coffee and explore the city. But, unfortunately, that ends up being the worst decision of their lives when an attacker starts trying to hunt them down one by one. Will they be able to survive this massacre?

Well, it all depends on the choice you make! After every chapter readers will have to vote for two options that can save or condemn one of the queens lives.

So, what are you going to choose?

——————————————————————————————————

Link for chapter 1: https://www.tumblr.com/ateneablack21/719940793182388224/drag-me-to-my-grave-by-ateneablack-and?source=share

You can also search for it in the #drag me to my grave

——————————————————————————————————

Chapter 2: Voting closed

Summary:

Jan’s decision plays out. The queens divide themselves into groups and separate.

Notes:

Hii! And welcome to the second chapter! Now we will reveal the combined votes we’ve received here and in Archive of our own (where we are also posting the story).

And the winner, 1 to 0 is…

Option 1: Jan crawls away from the attacker.

Good luck with your choice 😈.

————————

The attacker raised his arm, preparing to deliver a fatal stab in Jan's back...

Seeing this Jan screamed again, the terror clearer than ever in her voice. In fear and not knowing what to do to avoid death, the queen began to crawl away from her attacker in an attempt to prevent the stab from reaching her. This worked, the knife striking her left calf instead of its intended target.

A guttural scream left her mouth as she felt an agonizing pain in her leg, the stab breaking skin, muscle and even nerves. The pain was so horrible that Jan even blacked out for a few seconds, coming back to another extremely terrifying picture: The attacker was right in top of her, he having turned her around while she was out, his mouth open in a sickly grin as she looked at her with amusement.

“You see? I told you. There’s nothing you can do anymore to stop me. Unfortunately for you, this is where we part ways. But rest assured, honey, all your friends will receive the exact same treatment as you.”

And after those bloodcurdling words, the man raised his knife again, bringing it down hard and plunging it into Jan's chest. 

(…)

As all the queens ran to where Jan's screams were coming from Jackie thought that this was the most horrifying moment of her life, but, she was wrong: the most terrifying moment of her life was when her friend's screams suddenly stopped. Where before she was wishing her friend's desperate screams would stop, now she found herself praying that they would continue again, as it meant that she was still alive.

It wasn’t long before a terrifying and gruesome image appeared in front of them all. Jan was covered in blood, her own blood, eyes open and chest not moving, stabs in various parts of her body. Jan was… Dead.

For a brief moment, nothing happened, all of them too shocked by what they were seeing, but, this didn’t last long, as after approximately 20 seconds, chaos ensued. Nicky started shouting things that no one could understand in French, Crystal and Gigi started crying and hugging each other, and Jaida and Heidi fell to the ground looking at their friend's body in horror. And Jackie? She did nothing of the sort, simply staring at the body, before something in her snapped and caused her to move towards Jan, kneeling beside her and bringing her hands to the wound on her chest, applying force to it to get the blood to stop flowing out.

“Come on, you can’t leave us. You-You can’t leave me!” Cox exclaimed, tears starting to fall down her face as she continued applying increasingly more force to the wound “Don’t die on me, please… I-I need you to sta-stay with me, okay?”

Deciding that she needed to be the one that stayed focused so they could get out of there alive, Jaida slowly stood up, looking around in order to assess the situation. Looking around briefly she realised that all eyes were on Jan's body, but not directly on her, but on Cox, who was beside her. Hall stood up and went to her as it was obvious to her that the one who needed her support the most was Jackie, who had begun CPR on Jan's limp body, almost as if she was unaware (or subconsciously choosing to be unaware) that her friend was clearly dead. 

“Jackie… You need to stop.” Hall said, the older one continuing as sobs started to wrack her body “I know it hurts, okay? But we need to go. We need to get out of here.”

“I can’t leave her here, Jaida! I can’t, I simply can’t!”

“I know baby, I know. But we need to get ourselves to safety. You are not disappointing Jan if you leave, you know? I’m sure she wouldn’t want us to… Be gone too.”

"She is not gone. I can still save her, I know I can.” Jackie said, shaking her head at Hall's words and giving Jan two rescue breaths before continuing with the chest compressions “You need to call an ambulance, so that when they arrive they can treat her wounds and everything will be fine.”

"Ok, I'll call." Heidi informed, hoping it would help reassure the Persian queen.

She knew there was nothing that could save Jan, but, she was also aware that they had to call 911 before whoever had done that to her friend returned to the scene. But, of course, Jan’s killer wasn’t dumb, and, when Heidi pressed the call button, it didn’t work, her phone (all the phones) not being able to connect with the phone number she was calling to.

“It doesn’t work…”

“What do you mean it doesn’t work?” Nicky questioned, her French accent clearer due to the fear she was feeling.

“I mean that my fucking phone isn’t calling anyone!”

“Then try it again!”

“Guys, calm down.” Gigi started “Nothing is going to improve if we fight.”

"Nothing is going to improve. Period." Doll said, panic filling her mind "There's a killer on the loose out here and none of our phones are working! We're going to die in here."

"Don't say that, Nicky. We just need to get to the exit, get the hell out of here and get someone to call the police for us. We'll be fine, you'll see." Jaida reasoned, still trying to separate Jackie from Jan by gently tugging on Cox’s shoulders.

“If the fucking killer was smart enough to cut our phone’s service, then don’t you think they haven’t thought about locking us inside?!”

“Nicky is right… We are going to die here.” Crystal whispered, her eyes locked in on Jan’s dead body.

“Jackie, I hate to do this, but if you don’t move I’m going to force you to move.” Hall said, anxious about staying there much more time “And you two, we are not going to die, okay? If we work together to get out of here we’ll be just fine.”

"I'm going to go and check the front door." Gigi informed, itching to do something and wanting to check that they weren't actually trapped on the set.

"Are you crazy?! You can't go alone, there's a killer on the loose!” Crystal exclaimed, looking at Goode as if she had lost her mind “We all have to go together, so we have a better chance of living, haven't you seen any horror movies?”

“If we wait until everyone can go, which looking at Jackie it could take at least thirty minutes, the killer can find and kill us before we even check that the doors are closed.”

“It doesn’t matter if we check the doors Gigi, we don’t need to check them to know that we are locked inside!” Nicky started “If we heard Jan scream from the other side of the building, then I’m pretty sure someone outside heard it. And if nobody has come in to check what’s going on, then I don’t think someone in general can even get in!”

"Let's get out of here, lock ourselves in a room and then we'll see what we're going to do, ok?” Jaida said, finally having been able to separate Jackie from Jan, even if she was fighting to go back.

"Jaida let me go! Jaida, come on, please, we have to help her!” Cox screamed as she saw that she was being separated from her friend's body.

With nothing else to do and fearful of what might happen if they stayed at the scene of the crime any longer, the queens began to leave the scene, but not before Crystal approached Jan's corpse and closed her eyes, saying a small goodbye and apology to her.

As the queens walked towards the room where they had been earlier they couldn’t help think the worst possible scenarios that could happen. Were they all really going to die here? Was there any way to stop their fate from happening? There was only one way to know the answer to those questions and that was living it themselves, which of course, wasn’t something they wanted to experience soon.

The set was in complete silence, the only noises they could hear being Jackie’s sobs and Jaida’s soft words of reassurance. A couple of minutes passed like that, with all the queens simply trying to process what had just happened.

"We have to do something, anything. I can't stay here doing nothing much longer.” Gigi said, having been pacing around the room since they arrived.

“I guess we do have a couple of things to do…” Hall started “Before you say anything hear me out, okay? I think we should separate- ”

“What?! Are you crazy?”

“I know Crystal, horror movies or whatever, but we wouldn’t be totally alone. We could go in teams of two. 2 of us go to see if there’s any exit we could use to get out of here, another group goes to fix the lights - ‘cause if we can’t leave the set at least we could be able to see something - and someone stays here with Jackie, because I don’t think she can really do something right now.” Jaida continued, her voice showing a confidence she didn't really feel. She knew the plan she had made was the best she could come up with at the moment, but, still, it could go wrong in a thousand different ways. Crystal was right, splitting up was risky, but it was also the best thing to do if they wanted to get out of there fast.

Gigi, impatient to get out of there, sighed, nodding before saying:

“I… Actually agree with the plan. I know splitting up doesn’t seem appealing, and of course it isn’t, but we need to check the doors so we can leave and if we can’t, it would be super helpful to have the lights on instead of these stupid emergency lights that don’t even work properly.”

“Let’s do it, I guess.” Heidi reluctantly agreed.

“I can fix the lights, I’ve always been the one to do it in my family anyways.” Nicky offered, tapping her long, sharp nails against a table in an attempt to let her frustration out.

"I can go with you.” Gigi said, walking over to where the French queen was and standing next to her.

“Perfect, then I can go and check the doors, while one of you two stays here with Jackie and the other one comes with me." Essence Hall concluded, motioning to Crystal and Heidi as she spoke.

“I’ll go with you, Jai” Closet spoke, the two queens starting to walk towards the exit but, suddenly, when Jaida tried to move her hand away from Jackie’s, Cox grabbed it again, eyes teary as she looked at the other queen.

“Please… Don’t go, don’t leave me alone.”

“You aren’t going to be alone, Crystal is staying with you, right Crys?” Hall said.

"Yeah, I'm staying with you, Jackie. We're not going to leave you alone, ok? The others are only going to be gone for a little while and then they'll be back, I promise." Methyd reassured, her voice soft, sitting down next to the Persian queen and grabbing her free hand.

Even after Crystal's words, Jackie did not let go of Jaida's hand, standing up with some difficulty and clinging tightly to the other queen's arm to prevent her from leaving.

“Hey, I’ll be right back, I promise. I’ll be here again before you even notice I was gone.”

“Ple-Please Jaida, don’t go.”

“I’m sorry, but I have to-“

“You stay, I can go with Heidi instead. Just… Help Jackie feel more like herself I guess.” Crystal offered.

The other queen sighed and nodded in agreement, at least this way she could help her friend. After a few seconds of silence and with the Persian queen clearly much more calm, Hall said:

"Good luck, be careful".

And after those words the two groups left the room, saying their goodbyes and going off to complete their respective missions.

(…)

After watching the others leave, Jaida sat down next to Jackie, who was still in shock but now completely unresponsive, zoned out as her gaze stayed locked at her bloody hands.

It had been… Easier than Hall thought it would be, saying goodbye to Jan earlier, but she knew she was just in denial, trying to be the one person in their group that could think clearly so they could get out of there together. She knew sooner or later it would all catch up on her, but as for now, she forced herself to focus on everything else but the situation they were in, the first step to do that being helping the friend sitting beside her. 

Jackie was trembling, her breathing slow and shallow, tears quickly streaming down her face. Jaida didn't know the best way to help her, but she was going to try her best. She carefully helped her lie down, putting her feet up. She faintly remembered being in a health class back in high school, where they had explained what to do if someone was in a state of emotional shock. Unfortunately, the only thing she remembered to do was to lay her down and put her feet in the air.

The two queens stayed like that for a couple minutes, Jaida speaking to the older one in an effort to get her to come back to reality, but to no avail. Considering Cox had been staring at her hands earlier, she grabbed a packet of makeup wipes, opening it up and starting to get rid of the blood.

“Jackie? Can you hear me?” She asked, voice laced with concern as she carefully, but methodically, cleaned her bloody hands. “I don’t know if you can but… If you do hear me, just know that you are not alone. I’m here and I will always will, okay?”

The other queen gave no sign of having heard anything, but, Jaida kept talking, this continuing the five minutes it took Hall to wipe all of Jan's blood from Jackie's hands. When she finished the future winner carefully grabbed her sister's hands, bringing them close to the Persian queen's face and saying:

"Look, they're already clean. Is there anything else you need me to do for you?” she questioned, not expecting an answer, but being clearly surprised and relieved when she saw Jackie slightly shake her head no “Okay, that’s okay. Do you want to stay here or do you want me to help you sit down?”

“He-Here…” she whispered, her newly cleaned left hand slowing grabbing the other queen’s right forearm.

“Ok, ok, we will stay here. We won’t move until you feel ready to.”

The two queens stayed in silence for a couple minutes, Jaida alert to their surroundings, her eyes looking at the door, in case the others returned or, in the worst case scenario, the killer found them.

“Thank you… For sta-staying with me.” Jackie suddenly said, clearly more present now.

“Of course baby, it was nothing.”

After those words, the room was once again flooded with a comfortable silence, only to be broken by the sound of footsteps in the corridor outside the room. Carefully Jaida started walking towards the door, Jackie following close behind, the first peering out and seeing with relief that it was only Crystal and Heidi returning.

(…)

After leaving the room, Heidi and Crystal began to walk towards the front door, both keeping an eye out for any strange movements or sounds around them. The second tried to strike up a conversation, but N Closet was uncooperative, her mind far from the place.

Methyd sighed as she saw this, sad to see her friend suffering, grabbing the other’s hand and stopping walking, thus forcing her friend to do the same.

”Hey, Heidi.” She called gently, voice and eyes soft as she tried to bring the other queen back to reality “I need you to react, ok? I can't do this alone, please.”

After Heidi had been quiet for a couple of minutes, ignoring the other queen, Crystal sighed again, about to start walking when N Closet finally spoke:

"It's my fault.”

“What?”

“Jan’s… De-Death. It’s my fault. I could have stopped it.”

“Heidi… Come on, you know that’s not true” Crystal said, a few tears threatening to fall down her eyes as she spoke “We did the best we could to stop it.”

“You guys did, but not me… I heard something weird before the lights when out. If I had checked it out then maybe none of this would have happened.”

Crystal hugged Heidi tightly, noticing how she began to cry. It hurt her to see her sister like this, crying and full of guilt, when she was normally one of the kindest and funniest people she knew. Tears also began to well up in her eyes, the injustice of what they were experiencing hitting her hard. None of them deserved all this. Jan didn't deserve it... The two stayed in each other's arms for a couple of minutes, Methyd making sure to keep an eye out for the killer. Not wanting to be away from the others too much time, the two queens separated, starting to check, one by one, any windows or doors that could let them escape that place. Unfortunately for them, the killer had organised everything really well, all the exits shut down and the windows covered with metal so they couldn’t punch their way out.

After a while they both decided to start walking back to the room where Jaida and Jackie were, a little nervous about breaking the bad news that there was no escape to their two friends.

On their way there, almost on the verge of arriving, they saw Jaida and Jackie waiting for them at the door. Heidi and Crystal smiled slightly at them, as at least, even if they were in this horrible situation, they weren’t alone.

(…)

After saying goodbye, Gigi and Nicky left the room and started walking through the corridors of the studio, entering every room that had its door open to see if the light controls were there. After ten minutes of silence between the two queens, the French queen broke it, fear clear in her voice:

“What are we going to do if we run into the person who did this to Jan?”

“Honestly? I don’t know…” Gigi sighed, both queens stopping to try an open another door and see if it was the electricity room, which, as always, wasn’t the one they were searching for “I guess the best thing we can do right now is be vigilant. And just, don’t be alone I suppose.”

“Yeah… What I don’t understand is why this is happening? What have we done to that person to make them hate us this much?”

“Sometimes people don’t need a reason to do something bad.” Gigi said, her own fear causing her voice to tremble slightly “But, if it comes to it, I will protect you, I promise.”

The French queen smiled at her friend, who smiled back at her. Goode was terrified, but she was trying to remain calm and not show it, in order to reassure her sisters and calm their nerves.

“I will too.” Nicky simply whispered, squeezing her friend’s hand in a sign of support before stopping in front of one of the last doors in the hallway “Let’s hope this is it.”

And, to their surprise, it was, the door opening to show them the room they had been looking for for nearly 20 minutes. The room, as the rest of the building, only had the emergency lights on, some of the cabinets open and exposing the different switches that had been turned down in order to take out the lights.

"Mon Dieu, this will take a while to fix.” Nicky said, entering the room and approaching the switches and seeing that there were more than a hundred.

"Yeah... There are a lot of these." Gigi agreed, joining the other queen's side and seeing how none of them had labels with the names or functions for each switch “I think we should have someone keeping watch at the door, just in case the killer comes.”

“Yeah, it is the most prudent thing we can do after all. Do you want to stay here or do you want to stay at the door?”

“To be honest, I would prefer to stay here but I would get frustrated too quickly with all of switches and cables and all that shit, so… I guess I’ll be standing on the door.”

“Be careful” Doll told her.

“I will. And you be fast, please. The sooner we can get back to the others the better.”

After those words Gigi left the room, standing in the doorway and turning her back to Nicky to look down the hallway, the other queen beginning to fiddle with the switches to see which ones solved the problem of the lights. 

For the youngest one, time passed in slow motion, each second stretching into a vast amount of time. Every shadow or slightest sound made her heart leap in terror, her mind screaming at her to flee the place, but she knew she couldn’t run away, not until Nicky had finished and they both could leave together. There was no way she was leaving her friend alone, specially not after what had happened to Jan… Her desperate screams were still playing out in her head, and she wondered if she could have done anything different to avoid what had happened. It hurt her to think that, unfortunately, there wasn’t.

“How are you doing Nicky?” She asked, loud enough for the other queen to hear but still being careful not to draw any attention to themselves.

“C'est impossible! There’s too many switches and cords and I have no idea what to do with them!” Nicky replied, the frustration she was feeling clear in her voice.

”Do you want to switch positions with me so I can try and figure it out?” Gigi asked, a little lower than before, her panicked mind telling her to lower her voice in case Jan's attacker was nearby.

The French queen did not answer her season 12 sister's question, probably too focused on was she was doing to hear her, so, desperately wanting to get out of there as soon as possible, Gigi entered the room again, not before looking at both sides of the hallway in search of the attacker. Besides, with a person wandering around the set with a desire to kill, it didn't hurt to check that her friend was safe and sound (she wouldn’t forgive herself if she wasn’t).

“Nick?” she asked as she kneeled down next to said queen.

“What? Wait, what are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be outside?”

"I just... I asked you if you wanted to change places and when you didn't answer I came to make sure you were okay."  "Sorry, I didn't hear you. But, if you still want to stay while I'm at the door, we can do that." Doll suggested while looking at the other queen, standing up when she saw Goode nod “Okey then, I’ll be- GIGI, WATCH OUT!”

It was at that moment that the younger turned around, not having time to do more as, as soon as she turned and saw the menacing man standing behind her, he lifted his knife, hitting her in the head with the handle and sending her almost unconscious to the ground. Nicky could see a small river of blood begin to trickle down her friend's face, staining the floor red. 

The man raised his arm to stab Goode through the head when, suddenly, the French queen threw herself on top of him, pushing the attacker away from the younger queen. He grunted with rage as he shoved her off of him, grabbing her by the shoulders and throwing her against one of the electrical panels.

Nicky quickly got up, her eyes instinctively moving towards Gigi, which was still laying on the floor, obviously unconscious now. The man smiled as he approached her, the queen quickly looking around for anything she could use to defend herself, which, there was, but unfortunately for her, it was in the other side of the room, where Goode was. There was no way to get there without having to walk past the man with the knife and she knew that if she did, she, and consequently Gigi, were gonna die.

The queen tried to think of her next move, but, she had no time, the attacker moving his knife to slash her throat. Fortunately, Doll moved in time and managed to avoid having her throat cut open, albeit she did receive a gash on her right arm from the attack. Before she could scream though, he punched her in the diaphragm, leaving her without air. With a laugh, the killer brought a hand to her neck, stamping her against the concrete wall behind her and lifting her of the ground.

Nicky gasped as she felt the oxygen quickly leave her body, her mind starting to get hazy as she scratched the hand constricting her neck, which, even though it brought out some blood, it wasn’t enough to make the killer release her. She could feel her life slipping through her fingers and knew she only had time to make one decision that could save her life...

Option 1: Nicky brings her fingers to his eyes and jabs them with her nails.

Option 2: Nicky punches the killer in the stomach.

————————

Final notes:

Heyyy! We hope you enjoyed this new chapter! Remember to vote for your favorite option in the comments!

See you soon!

Pd: Don’t make us kill Nicky please 🥲

[ihopeyouliketaylorswift]

exclusive images of my only two braincells arguing at 3 a.m. on a wednesday

[slutnali]

Bring Back My Ghouls promo pics pt. 1

[dddddrag]

Season 12 duckie slumber party!!

I feel like this didn't get enough love on Instagram so I'm posting it everywhere

[yeet-the-dreamies]

jaida essence hall may be the essence of trade in season 12 but:

guys gals and nb pals, jackie cox

[artificialqueens]

Get Rid of All Your Sorrows in the Summer City (Jankie, Lemyanka, Halldoll, Crygi) - Mar

A/N: Part of the Jankie parenthood universe. Set after Nicky leaves. Can be read on ao3.

Summary: The family goes to the beach to get some rest, solve some things, lick their wounds.

***

“Alright!” Jan claps. “Everybody ready?”

She surveys the row of people in Jackie’s living room, all weighted down with various travel bags and rucksacks.

“Not yet,” says Jaida, focused on slathering sunscreen on —two very disgruntled— Gigi and Crystal. “Y’all ain’t getting skin cancer on my watch,” she says, moving to pat the leftover sunscreen on Lemon’s cheeks until Lemon swats her away.

While Jan gets them all in a little duck row to leave, Jackie goes around the house one last time, ticking off her mental checklist. Windows shut, lights off, Jan’s contact solution and the blanket Gigi needs to sleep when they have nightmares.

“Wallets, IDs, car keys, house keys, everybody has their luggage?” She receives a chorus of yes. “Perfect, I guess all we’re missing is—”

“Beach time!” shouts Priyanka as she enters the house, already clad in a bikini top and giant sun hat. The kids squeal and run to her, and Priyanka has to drop her bag to catch them mid-jump. “Let’s go, then, come on!” she says, leaving as quickly as she entered.

“Okay, I’ll lock up here,” says Jackie as she hands Jan the car keys. “Everyone, get in the car.”

“Shotgun!” Jaida yells.

“No!” Lemon screams and runs out the door after her.

Jan clicks the car open and follows her sisters, watching them wrestle to get in the front seat. Lemon is half inside the car, half on the sidewalk, pushing Jaida’s face away as Jaida tries to pull Lemon out by the arm.

“Get. Out,” mumbles Jaida from behind Lemon’s hand. “I called shotgun!”

“Be faster, then!”

“Both of you, get out,” Jackie commands. They stop struggling. “Jan gets shotgun.”

Sulking, Jaida and Lemon get in the middle seat of the van.

“Yes, guys, don’t be childish,” says Jan smuggly, sitting in the passenger seat. Hiding her face from Jackie, she sticks her tongue out at her sisters.

Despite the early hour, the car buzzes with energy. Encouraged by Priyanka, the kids go through every car trip song in the first fifteen minutes, and then rope everyone in a long game of I Spy.

They barely get on the highway before Gigi announces she has to pee.

Jackie glances at her kid in the rearview mirror.

“You couldn't think of that before we left the house?”

Gigi grins and shakes their head.

“I have to go too,” Crystal says.

“Me too, actually.”

“Yeah, same.”

Jackie sighs.

She gets off the highway.

            Jackie sets them loose in the parking lot of a gas station and tells them to be back in fifteen. Jan promises coffee and pastries and leaves her with a kiss.

They have two and a half hours of driving ahead. Jackie walks around the parking lot and stretches every muscle, gearing up.

The sun is just now starting to warm up the morning. It is horrendously early. The sisters are fine, obviously, and the kids are too excited to complain, but Jackie’s freelancer circadian rhythm is struggling.

Twenty minutes later, everyone comes back, arms laden with snacks. Jan hands Jackie her coffee and watches her drain it, desperate for more energy.

“Want me to drive for a bit?” Jan offers.

“I’m good.”

With a satisfied sigh, Jackie throws the empty cup in the trash and tells everyone to get in.

The kids have renewed energy and demand car games. Jaida teaches them the alphabet game, and they make use of their newly acquired knowledge of letters to find them in the signs they see along the way. Around the letter R, they both fall asleep.

The ride gets a little more quiet from then on. They make a brief stop so Priyanka can dislodge herself from under Gigi’s head and move to the middle seat, where she can participate in their conversations without waking up the kids. Jackie glances at the rearview mirror and bites back a smile. The middle seat is crowded, and it’s funny to watch Lemon fake nonchalance about the way Priyanka is completely pressed against her body.

Jackie wonders how long that will take. The flirt-fighting has been going on for a while. It’s very clear they like each other; Priyanka’s not subtle at all, and Lemon never tried to hide it.

And still, for whatever reason, they seem to be at an impasse.

Jan thinks Priyanka will break first, but Jackie’s not so sure. She has known her for years, and has seen the worst of her stubbornness.

Either way, it’s entertaining. Their whole friend group has been watching Priyanka deny there is anything going on while she looks at Lemon like she’s two seconds from pinning her down on the nearest surface and— okay, no, Jackie doesn’t want to think about her best friend and her sort-of-little-sister like that. Jackie needs that train of thought wiped from her mind, so she's very grateful for Jan’s attempt to oh-so-casually change the current playlist, and the commotion it brings.

“Hey!” Jaida yells immediately once she sees what her sister is doing. “No showtunes in the car, you know how that ends. Give me the phone.”

Jan huffs and passes her phone to Jaida, who quickly switches playlists.

“How does it end?” asks Jackie, always curious about Jan’s past. Jaida and Lemon have been invaluable sources of endless anecdotes, and she loves any new piece, especially the ones that make Jan blush like she does now.

“‘Kay, so,” Lemon starts, scooting forward. “Jan had just gotten her license, and we were all so excited because now we could drive places without our parents—”

“—meaning they made me their personal chauffeur,” Jan clarifies.

“Hush, I’m telling the story. So Jan’s one rule was that the driver gets to choose the music.”

“Pretty basic rule,” Jan defends.

“You can imagine how much fun that was for us,” says Jaida. “She wouldn’t even let us talk when her favorites were playing.”

“So one day, she’s driving us to some birthday, or something.”

“Cousin Katie’s birthday.”

“Cousin Katie’s, yes. And Jan’s torturing us with her new Wicked CD.”

“Scream-singing the whole way, too. Windows down, hair flying everywhere, you get the picture.”

“Defying gravity starts playing and Jan tells us to shut up.”

“She sings the whole thing perfectly, getting more and more hype.”

“The high notes start. She’s so into it, she’s not even in the car anymore, she’s on a stage in her mind performing her heart out.”

“She starts screaming with her eyes closed and lets go of the wheel—”

“—and the car immediately runs up the sidewalk.”

“Into a tree.”

The girls pause their story because everyone is cackling by then, except Jan, who has her face buried in her hands.

“I was feeling the fantasy,” she mumbles.

“Were you all okay?” Priyanka says through the laughter, though with more alarm than warranted for a car crash that happened ten years ago.

“Yeah, we were all fine,” Lemon says, gently laying her hand on Priyakna’s knee.

“The car sure wasn’t,” Jaida says. “We get down, the whole left side of the hood is dented, the light fell off, everything.”

“Jan’s crying, thinking she’s gonna get shipped off to military school.”

“Lemon had to call mom and explain everything while I tried to convince Jan not to become a fugitive.”

Jackie knows about Teresa. She has heard the stories. She imagines having to tell the woman she crashed her car, and shivers.

“Was she angry?”

“She was worried, mostly,” Jaida says. “They rushed to pick us up, and mom kept us on the phone the whole time.”

“They found us and immediately started patting our skulls and limbs like they could find a fracture just from that.”

“But we were fine, and they calmed down.”

“And then,” Lemon says, her eyes lost in the distance. “Then came the nightmare.”

“I had never been yelled at like that in my life,” Jan says with a shudder. “You don’t wanna see mom angry.”

“I believe you,” Jackie says.

Meeting Jan’s parents is something she anticipates and fears in equal measure. She’s had success with both sisters, even if it took Lemon a minute to warm up, but parents are a different beast. She’s never done it, for one. Her only serious ex was deep inside the closet, and no one else ever reached that level of importance in her life.

Jackie looks at Jan, her purple swimsuit peeking out under her tank top, hair tangled from the wind and cheeks flushed from embarrassment, and she knows she would face anything for her. Even Teresa’s wrath.

“I thought mom would tear her vocal cords from yelling that much.”

“And dad was even worse,” Jan sighs. “He did that thing where he doesn’t yell, but you can tell how disappointed he is from one look.”

“Oh, I hate that,” Jaida says. “I got the look the only time I ever failed chemistry. Never again.”

“Hm,” Lemon says, thoughtfully. “Sounds awful.”

“Shut up—” “Shut the fuck up, Lemon,” her sister yell, making her snort with laughter.

“What? What’s up?” Priyanka asks.

“Oh, you didn’t know? Lemon is Little Miss Perfect.”

“She can do no wrong in our parents’ eyes, ‘cause she’s the princess of the house.”

“It’s your own fault,” Lemon said. “You two wore them down so much that by the time I started misbehaving, they were too tired to stop me.”

“They let her get away with everything, I swear,” says Jan.

“Everything! She didn’t have to sneak out of the house because our parents would drive her to every party, not even a curfew or nothing. They’d pick her up at any time in the car, with blankets and a snack.”

“Back in our day,” says Jan, pointing between herself and Jaida, “we had to climb down the roof under my bedroom window and pray the gutter didn’t collapse under our weight.”

“All that effort just to go to a party in someone’s dingy basement, to drink cheap beer and those nasty cocktails our friends invented.”

“Remember that Halloween party, when someone called the cops?”

“We were jumping over fences in high heels.”

“I lost a shoe and we both lost our purses.”

“That one was fun to explain to mom and dad,” Jaida laughs. “I can’t believe they didn’t buy ‘a man stole both our purses and Jan’s left shoe’.”

Jackie laughs along with everyone else, but then she glances at the rearview mirror. In the backseat, her child and their best friend sleep like two perfect angels. She fears what their teenage years will put her through.

With music and conversation, the trip goes by faster than expected. When they finally reach the town, Priyanka wakes up the kids.

“Look,” she whispers, “there’s the beach.”

Gigi and Crystal yawn and look out the window with sleepy eyes, but they perk up when they see it for the first time.

The big, wide sea, waiting for them.

“Can we go to the beach now, mom?”

“We’ll go in a minute, honey, we just have to drop everything off at the house first.”

The kids keep their eyes on the water the whole way to the house. It’s a small place right on the sand with three bedrooms, nothing fancy but big enough. They will just use it to shower and sleep anyways; the rest of their time will be spent at the beach or around town.

They drop their bags in the bedrooms, everyone claiming a bed and changing quickly to line by the door, where Jaida forces them all to get a new layer of sunscreen. With Jackie’s okay, they all run out the door.

Jan, Lemon and Jaida set up camp as Crystal and Gigi lead Jackie and Priyanka to the water. They squeal when the waves reach their feet, and they scramble back into the grown up’s arms yelling with excitement. Priyanka holds Crystal high on the water and threatens to throw her in, and Crystal laughs and squirms so much that Priyanka almost drops her for real.

Gigi is mesmerized in her mom’s arms, entranced by the waves, and Jackie is mesmerized looking at her child discover a piece of the world.

“Do you like it, honey?”

Gigi nods and rests against her mom’s chest.

“Can we live on the beach?”

Jackie inhales deeply, filling her lungs with sea salt.

A lifetime ago, she chose her career exactly for that reason. So she could pack up her things and go anywhere, any time.

Then Gigi came along, and moving became a bit more complicated, though not impossible. Over time, however, they got attached to their city, their friends, and now they had Jan, and Jan had her job and her family.

Still, nothing was set in stone.

“Maybe someday.”

Eventually, they all get in the water. They make a pact not to splash each other, which is honored for about two minutes before Priyanka starts doing karate chops on the water, spraying Lemon’s face. Lemon protests, but it loses weight with how much she’s giggling. Jan dares Jackie to swim further and further in, and they dive under waves until their companions are only distant voices. Jaida stays with the kids in the shallows, holding their hands to make them spin around, sand flying everywhere.

Around noon, Jan and Jackie herd everyone inside for lunch and try to calm down the kids enough for a nap. Even all of their excitement can’t compete with the exhaustion of a morning spent at the beach, and they’re asleep in minutes.

At four, when the sun is more merciful, they go down to the beach again. The kids head straight for the water with Jan, Priyanka and Jaida, but Jackie sits down to read under an umbrella and Lemon does the same in a towel under the sun. They can’t focus for long. Their eyes are called to the water.

Jan and Priyanka are swinging Crystal over the waves, helping her jump when one gets too close. Gigi has discovered that the sea erases her footprints, so she makes paths on the sand and is delighted everytime she looks back and sees there’s nothing left. Jaida joins Gigi for a while, but soon enough, she starts walking along the water, far away from the rest.

“Time for her daily mourning session,” says Lemon, watching her sister walk away.

Jackie smiles at the concern in Lemon’s voice, noticeable even through the joke.

“She just misses Nicky, is all.”

“I know.”

Lemon watches Jaida for a while, then goes back to reading her book and staring at Priyanka.

Jaida is not alone. Jackie misses her too. She wished Nicky a safe trip before she left, and that was the last time they spoke. In her mind, Jackie’s been repeating to herself that Nicky needs some time to get adjusted to being back in France, but that excuse gets weaker every day and Jackie still won’t text her.

In a selfish, childish way, Jackie is angry. The rational side of her brain knows that Nicky’s her own woman, free to go wherever and build the best life she can. But she misses her friend, and when Gigi asks sadly if aunt Nicky will stay away forever, rationality flies out the window.

The move hit them all harder than expected. After so much change, their group had found its footing, and Nicky was a crucial part of it. Now everything’s off kilter, and they don’t know how long it will take for things to feel stable again.

Jackie wants to ask Lemon if she’s heard when Nicky will come back, or if she will come back at all, but she has a feeling that Lemon doesn’t know either. The person most likely to know is Jaida, and no one dares to ask her.

After some time, Jan drags herself out of the water, away from the three fireballs of energy still going strong.

“Tag in,” she tells Lemon as she points back with her thumb.

Lemon whines, but she still gets up and goes to help Priyanka with the kids. Jan wastes no time to plop down on her towel.

“They’re gonna sleep well tonight,” Jackie observes, watching the kids still jumping around with intact energy.

“We all will,” Jan mumbles against the towel.

“Really? You’re not gonna spend any time with me tonight?” Jackie smiles.

Jan sits up and looks at Jackie, squinting through the sunlight.

“Hm. Maybe. What are you suggesting?”

“That we break in the bed.” Jackie leans over the armrest of her beach chair and slides two fingers under the strap of Jan’s bikini top. “And that you keep this on.” She snaps the strap against Jan’s skin.

Jan bites her lip, leaning forward to kiss Jackie, as languidly as the warm summer day demands.

A blood curdling scream cuts the air.

Their eyes fly to the water, but Gigi and Crystal are safe on the shore.

In the water, however, Lemon sinks Priyanka under the surface and then tries to swim away from the retaliation, but Priyanka resurfaces and grabs her legs to drag her down.

“No, no, no—” is the last thing they hear before Lemon is underwater.

Priyanka’s triumph lasts for a microsecond and then she falls like someone took her out at the knees.

“I never thought I’d have more kids, let alone two twenty year olds,” Jackie says.

“They’re mentally five, put together.”

They watch Crystal and Gigi peacefully build sandcastles. They either don’t notice or don’t care that the waves still reach them and bring down their creations again and again.

“You don’t want more kids?” asks Jan, eyes still on the shore.

Jackie bites her cheek.

It’s time.

She takes a moment, and says the words that have been running through her mind for weeks.

“I’ve thought about it,” she starts, closing the book on her lap. “Once I felt settled with Gigi, I thought, maybe it’s time for another kid. It sounds like the next logical step, doesn’t it? But…” Jackie pauses, looking at Gigi. They’re handing shells to Crystal to decorate the castle. “I really like our life as it is.”

Jan doesn’t say anything. She just rests her chin on her arm on the chair, and listens.

“I don’t want to divide my attention with another kid, when I could focus it all on Gigi. And I know people think only children are selfish or spoiled, but this isn’t the case. Gigi grew up with children, she has friends she sees everyday, she’s well socialized. She doesn’t need to live with other kids to learn from them, you know?”

“She’s a perfect kid,” Jan says with sincerity, smiling fondly in their direction. “Gigi doesn’t strike me as the sibling type, either. They’ve never mentioned wanting siblings, at least.”

Jan watches the kids. They’ve abandoned their castles and are digging a giant hole in the sand, for an unclear purpose.

Jackie watches Jan. She takes her hand and interlaces their fingers, steading herself.

“Do you… do you want more kids?”

Jan smiles at the word ‘more’. She considers the question, not for the first time.

“I always thought I would, because I come from a big family. And I can’t imagine my life without my sisters, but that’s because I have them. And if you wanna talk socialization, or whatever, even with two sisters I was really shy growing up, but Jaida and Lemon weren’t. That kind of thing is very hit or miss, there is no guarantee of anything.” Jan uncrosses her legs and sits up straighter. “Besides, we get along, but I know plenty of siblings who hate each other.”

“Do you?”

“Did I tell you I have an uncle I’ve never met? We don’t even know why, Mom just refuses to talk about him. All I know is they haven’t spoken since before my mom had me.”

The strong grip on Jan’s hand has relaxed. Jackie lays back on her chair.

“Were you stressing about this?” asks Jan.

“No… A little? I didn’t know how to bring it up, but I knew I’d have to sooner or later.” Jackie swallows hard. “I was worried that… that our answers wouldn’t match.”

Jan stands up and sits on Jackie’s lap, taking her face in her hands to kiss her.

“For the record?” Jan says. “I like our life too.”

Jackie’s smile is so beautiful that Jan needs to kiss it a hundred more times.

    ________________________________________________________________________   

The after effects of a beach day are felt by them all.

Gigi and Crystal are a bit grumpy. They get into an argument over what cartoon to watch, so Jackie takes the remote away from them and takes them to their room for a quick nap before dinner. Lemon enjoys having the TV for herself for all of two minutes, before she falls asleep on the couch.

Jan keeps yawning as she makes dinner, and even the hurricanes that are Priyanka and Jaida sit down in silence, scrolling their phones.

The kids wake up ravenous. Dinner is a simple affair, and it’s gone in ten minutes. In a much better mood, Gigi and Crystal finally agree on a movie and spread out on the couch, already sleepy again.

The other kids, however, are back in full force. Jaida, Lemon and Priyanka have decided to go out and they start downing Red Bulls the minute dinner is over, while Jaida Googles every bar and club nearby.

Makeup bags and potential outfits take over their bedroom and spread out to the living room as skirts, heels and can-I-borrow-yours fly across the house. Jackie and Jan watch the chaos unfold from the couch, amused, each with a child’s head on their lap, stroking their hair.

“Do you miss it?” Jackie whispers to Jan as they watch the other girls get ready together.

Jan smiles at her.

“Do you?”

“Fair point.”

Priyanka claims the shower first and disappears in the bathroom. Lemon volunteers to do the dishes for what may be the first time in her life, and Jackie sees why when they hear a yelp from the shower when Lemon turns on the faucet. She giggles and Jaida drags her out of the kitchen.

“It’s like watching kindergarteners with a crush,” Jan says, so done with her sister’s antics.

“You’re doing a disservice to kindergarteners everywhere. Especially these two,” says Jackie, looking at the kids on their laps, who are starting to wake up more with the general mayhem. “They’re married and everything.”

The girls get ready in a cloud of perfume and blush, running back and forth from the living room to the bedrooms to the bathroom. Now fully awake, Gigi and Crystal follow the whirlwind, fascinated with the ritual and begging to be part of it. Gigi teeters around in Jaida’s high heels and Crystal sits down for Priyanka to draw hearts of eyeliner on her cheeks. Lemon straightens her own hair and gets Jackie’s permission to do a few light curls on Gigi’s. Someone’s phone is blasting a going out playlist and Jaida dances around with Crystal on her hip, making her laugh wildly with every spin.

Jan takes control of the music and curls up with Jackie on the empty couch, while her sisters pose for her and ask a million things.

“Jan, can I borrow your blue halter top?”

“Jan, this jacket or this one?”

“Jan, can you do my eyebrows? I can never do them like you.”

Jackie sees that Jan is having fun. Her big heart always gets joy from her sisters’ happiness, but still, there is a hint of sadness in her.

When everyone is almost ready, Priyanka goes to the room to get her jacket and purse.

Jaida peeks down the hallway to make sure the coast is clear and immediately corrals Lemon.

“So?” she says.

Lemon doesn’t look away from her hand mirror.

“So what?”

“Don’t ‘so what’ me, are you gonna do something or not?”

Lemon rolls her eyes and pockets the mirror.

“Shouldn’t you be worried about getting laid yourself? It’s been like a month.”

Jan recoils at her sister’s bluntness. That’s a topic they just don’t touch. Jaida frowns and tenses up, but Priyanka enters the room just then, struggling to get her jacket on.

“What are we talking about?” she says.

The three sisters freeze.

“Jaida getting laid,” Jakies says smoothly.

“Fuck yeah! We’re getting you a little somethin’ somethin’,” says Priyanka, waggling her eyebrows and bumping her hip with Jaida’s. It gets her laughing, and any tension leaves the room.

“Everybody ready? I’ll call a cab.”

“It’s four blocks, you bum. We’re walking there.”

Loudly and chaotically, they all get their things and do last-second touch ups. Lemon and Jaida leave loud kisses on Jan’s cheeks, lipstick marks and all. The girls yell their goodbyes, and they’re out the door.

The house is quiet.

For about a minute, before Gigi trips in their heels and lands on their butt. Crystal rushes to their aid but they giggle and get up, unharmed.

“I think it’s bedtime for us, guys,” Jan says, standing up and stretching. She holds her hand to Jackie and helps her up.

They wash the makeup off Crystal’s face and convince Gigi to get down from the heels. Teeth brushed, PJs on, they set the kids down in the queen bed they are sharing, and read them a story until their eyes close.

Jan and Jackie stay with them for a moment, one on each side of the kids, to make sure they’re really asleep.

Jan’s fingers find Gigi’s hair again, threading it softly away from their face. She traces their forehead, their nose, and smiles when their eyelids flutter.

“I do miss it, sometimes,” she whispers. Jackie finds her eyes in the dim light. “Getting ready with them, more than clubbing. We still do it sometimes, but it’s a rare treat more than a weekly thing. I don’t know,” Jan shakes her head a little, hair falling on her face. “We learned to do everything together, you know what I mean? Jaida and I bought our first lipglosses together, went to our first club together, did horrible things to our eyebrows together. Then we taught Lemon how to paint her nails and walk in heels. We learned to dye our hair in the kitchen sink, we even got our first tattoos together. To see them do those things without me feels… weird.”

There’s a familiar guilt bubbling in Jackie’s stomach. Jan gives her a small smile.

“So yes, I do miss it, I won’t lie. When we started dating, I knew I would be giving up some things, but— Jackie.” Jan’s hand finds Jackie’s over the comforter. “I came into this with eyes open. And I don’t regret it, not even a little bit. I need you to understand this: I’m not losing anything.” She squeezes Jackie’s hand. “We have both made our choices.”

Her smile is genuine, and it calms down the gnawing in Jackie’s stomach.

When both kids are breathing evenly, the women sneak out to their own bedroom.

They fall to bed with kisses and wandering hands, but sleep claims them both soon enough. They stay intertwined until morning.

    ________________________________________________________________________

   Any lingering regret Jan may have had for not going out vanishes the next morning, as she and Jackie walk cheerfully around the park, while Lemon and Jaida drag behind them with giant sunglasses, giant cups of coffee and the hangover of a lifetime.

Priyanka fared much better, and thank God, because Gigi and Crystal keep pulling her towards every loud and flashing game in the park. It leaves Jan and Jackie free to walk hand in hand, feeding cotton candy to each other and enjoying the general honeymoon feeling they’ve had since they got to the beach.

“Gross,” Lemon mumbles behind them after they share a particularly long kiss.

Unbothered, Jan licks sugar from Jackie’s lips.

“What you have is envy,” says Jackie.

“What I have is nausea.”

“You’re just pissy because you chickened out last night and didn’t kiss Priyanka,” Jaida mumbles.

“Oh, I’m sorry for being considerate and not abandoning you in the club!” Lemon says.

“Stop yelling,” Jaida hisses, touching the iced coffee cup to her temple. “And that is a damn lie. You’re just a little chicken,” Jaida teases, pushing Lemon’s shoulder.

“Ugh, don’t touch me, I’m gonna puke,” Lemon says and stops dead in her tracks to steady herself. She leaves with Jaida to go find a table to sit at until they feel like humans again.

Jan spots a ferris wheel and steals Jackie away, after making sure that Priyanka can handle the kids by herself.

Crystal and Gigi take Priyanka all over the park, and finally stop in front of the haunted house.

“Pri, can we go in? Please, please, please?” Gigi begs.

“I don’t know. It looks actually scary,” Priyanka says, eyeing the flashing lights and clouds of smoke that filter out through the open doors of the house.

“It’s very kid friendly until nine,” says the man cutting tickets at the entrance. “That’s when the teenagers show up and we kick it up a notch, but for now, they can handle it.”

Priyanka looks at the house, looks at the kids, looks at the house again.

“Can I get three tickets?”

The kids run inside giggling, each holding one of Priyanka’s hands. When the door closes and they are submerged in darkness, they quiet down.

It’s been a while since Priyanka’s been in one of these, but she knows enough to expect the ghost that jumps out from around the corner.

For the kids, it’s a new experience.

Crystal screams and Gigi lets go of Priyanka’s hand to cover her eyes. Priyanka fumbles in the darkness for Gigi, lest she loses them in the worst possible place, and she’s about to drag both kids outside when Crystal starts laughing.

“Boo!” she yells at Gigi, and they uncover their eyes. “I’m the scariest monster in here!”

Gigi starts laughing at Crystal, and they both make ghostly wails loud enough to drown out the ones playing on the speakers above.

They rush ahead, leaving Priyanka to scamper after them.

The hallways are covered in spider webs, shadows crawl up the walls and every other floorboards creeks. A witch pops up and cackles, and Gigi mimics her laugh. A giant werewolf slashes the air in front of them with its giant claws, but Crystal jumps forward and growls at it.

Priyanka is having a field day. None of the monsters know what to do with the little humans terrorizing their castle.

Right before the exit, they face the final monster. A rotting zombie comes at them moaning and groaning, but the kids jump at him with their little arms raised and yell so loudly that the zombie falls back. Priyanka laughs so hard that she can barely apologize to the guy in the costume.

They leave the house laughing, Crystal and Gigi still jumping around and growling. Priyanka rewards their bravery (and her own) with caramel apples.

    ________________________________________________________________________   

“So why didn’t you kiss Priyanka last night?”

Jaida is almost horizontal on a park bench resting her back on the table, slurping the last of her iced coffee.

Next to her, Lemon is slumped on the table. She lifts her head and her sunglasses are crooked, her hair spiked in every direction.

“I told you—”

“You didn’t want to leave me alone, I know. Cute. What about when I was dancing with that girl, the tall one? I was gone for a full hour.”

Lemon rubs her eyes under the sunglasses.

“I don’t know. It didn’t feel like the right moment.”

“You waiting for trumpets, or something? There are no right moments, you make them.”

“Fuck off with that Disney rhethoric, you know what I mean. We were drunk at a club, it wasn’t the right time to like, open my heart, or whatever.”

“Your heart?” says Jaida, digging her elbows on the table to lift herself up. “Who said heart?”

Lemon starts swirling the straw inside her empty coffee cup.

“I actually like her,” she finally says. “In a really annoying, ‘let’s go on dates and hold hands’ kind of way. Which is annoying. She’s so annoying.”

Jaida smiles at her sister, who won’t meet her eyes, and softens her voice.

“Does she know?”

“I don’t think so. She thinks I’m just bothering her because I want to jump her bones, which I do—”

“Gross.”

“—but it’s more than that. But she doesn’t take me seriously.”

Endeared as Jaida is by her little sister’s pout, somebody needs to talk some sense into her.

“I think that’s because you’ve been doing the adult version of pulling on her pigtails at recess.”

“She bullies me too!” Lemon defends herself. “That’s just how we communicate.”

“And how’s that working out for you?”

“I don’t know, how’s long distance working out for you?"

The cup in Jaida’s hand crinkles, and Lemon knows she’s gone too far.

“Low blow, Lemon,” Jaida says with a terse voice, getting up.

“I’m sorry,” Lemon says, grabbing Jaida’s wrist before she can leave. “You’re right, that was totally uncalled for. And a bitch move.”

“A real bitch move,” says Jaida. She sits back down.

Lemon pushes her sunglasses up into her hair and squints in the sunlight, trying to get used to it.

“You’ve been talking to her, right?”

Jaida nods.

“Everyday since she left. Since the plane, really.”

“And… and is she, like—”

“I don’t know when she’ll be back.”

The ‘if’ hangs in the air between them.

Jaida’s posture gets tense, and Lemon regrets the whole conversation. At least now she has an answer about Nicky, even if it’s not the one she wanted.

“She had to leave,” Jaida says after a moment. “It’s not the same as your thing.”

Lemon bites her tongue and just nods.

“It’s not,” Jaida insists. “You’re not being honest because, I don’t know why, honestly, ‘cause Priyanka clearly likes you, even if she pretends she doesn’t. The girl’s an open book.”

Lemon smiles at that.

“But Nicky had to leave,” Jaida repeats like a mantra. “It was a good opportunity, one she’d waited for her whole life. I couldn’t keep her tied here sewing children’s costumes just so I could have her at my beck and call. That would be…”

“Selfish,” Lemon finishes. Jaida nods. “And that’s not you. But it’s also not the full truth, right?”

Jaida glares at the ground.

“I know Nicky,” Lemon says. “She would’ve stayed for you. Happily. But you didn’t let her make that choice. You practically packed her bags for her.”

“And what would you have done, Lemon?” Jaida retorts. “If you were in my position, if Priyanka had some incredible job offer across the fucking sea that she was willing to sacrifice to be with you. Could you live with that?”

“It is so not the same! Pri and I aren’t even dating.”

Jaida squints at her.

“You’re right, you’re not dating Priyanka, which is what we were talking about. Stop changing the subject, I hate it when you do that.”

Lemon laughs at being caught, and wonders if she should drop the subject altogether.

For how talkative and sociable she is, Jaida rarely talks about the big stuff. She’s a chatterbox with good deflection skills, quick to shift the focus from herself to others, and Lemon only notices because she does the same. They leave the feelings talk to Jan. God knows she has enough for the three of them.

Lemon basks in the sunlight. Even through the hangover, she can see that it’s a really beautiful morning. Warm and sunny, perfect for going to the beach later like they planned. Lemon puts her sunglasses back on, and gets her words in order.

“She’s my friend.”

Jaida turns to look at her.

“Pri, I mean. She’s my friend, and I don’t have a lot of those.” Lemon digs her heel in the grass under the table. “If we date and it goes up in flames, we wouldn’t have that anymore.”

“Why do you jump straight to the worst case scenario?”

Lemon stares at Jaida.

“I’m serious. I know I’m not exactly a success story right now, but look at Jan. She got herself a wife and a kid. That could be you!”

“Ew, why would you say that to me?” Lemon says, scrunching her nose to make Jaida laugh. “Plus, I don’t know,” she shrugs, twisting around on the bench to sit like Jaida, her back to the table. “Our lives are so entangled, we have the same friends. A breakup would get messy.”

“Yeah,” Jaida sighs. “I know.”

Nicky’s move affected everyone. The whole city feels duller without Nicky taking them all to some underground bar, or niche art gallery or exclusive wine tasting slash build-your-own-furniture event that only Nicky could find.

Everybody feels her absence: she is missed by the kids, she is missed at the studio, there is a glaringly empty seat at Jackie’s table when they get together. And Jaida…

Lemon’s heart aches when she thinks back to that first week, when Jaida locked herself in her room for days, barely eating and missing work. It got bleak. Jan and herself had to force Jaida out of bed, followed by days of overseeing her eating habits, making her get dressed and go out, and not leaving her alone for long.

Lemon had seen her sister in bad states before. Sick, exhausted, heartbroken. But she had never seen her give up.

It took many tears and many sleepless nights to bring Jaida back to some semblance of normalcy. They can only hope the worst has passed.

“Your turn,” Lemon says, throwing her empty cup into a garbage can.

“Huh?”

“I opened up and got all vulnerable, now you go. Why is Nicky across the Atlantic right now?”

Jaida shifts in her seat.

“Can we leave this for when I’m less hungover?”

“If you don’t start talking, I’ll scream in your ear at the top of my lungs.”

“Fine,” Jaida relents, shuddering. She’s silent for a few moments. Groups of people stroll by with the carefree air of summer days. “I can’t give her what she wants.”

Lemon frowns.

“What do you mean?”

“You know, for the future. We want different things.”

“What does she want?”

“The typical stuff,” Jaida says with a dismissive wave of the hand.”

“But like, what is that? Have you even asked her?”

“She wants what everybody wants, Lemon,” Jaida snaps. “She wants to get married and get a house, and probably have kids, and a girlfriend who won’t leave for months on tour.”

Jaida sees Lemon’s expression and steadies herself.

“If I’d made her stay…” Jaida continues, quieter this time. “If I asked her to stay, I would owe her too much. I would have to stay more often, for her, and I can’t do that. We shouldn’t have to give up on our careers just to be together.”

Lemon blinks at her. She looks over Jaida’s back, hoping Jan will show up to deal with this topic that Lemon doesn’t want to touch with a ten-foot pole. Jaida’s mommy issues are way above her paygrade.

When Jan doesn’t magically materialize by their side to save the day, however, Lemon has to do her best.

“Have you asked her?” she repeats.

Jaida’s lips tighten into a thin line.

“No.”

Lemon smiles at Jaida and bumps her shoulder, trying to dissolve some of the heaviness between them.

“Where do you get off preaching openness and communication, then?”

“I’m gonna play the ‘big sister’ card and tell you to do as I say, not as I do.”

Lemon laughs and lets the subject drop. She got some wheels turning in Jaida’s brain, and that’s enough for now. They couldn’t keep talking either way, because a minute later, Priyanka and the kids join their table.

“Well, these little monsters terrorized the haunted house,” says Priyanka with a proud smile, sitting with Gigi while Crystal climbs Jaida’s lap. “I hope you two had fun, because they’ll never let us back in there,” she tells the kids.

“Pity, you would have made such a good swamp monster,” Lemon says.

Priyanka smirks.

“Hey, Crys? Show Lemon your growl.”

Crystal roars loudly in Lemon’s ear until it makes her slump face down on the table.

“Oof, not so loud, baby,” whines Jaida, the unfortunate casualty. “Aunty Jai is not feeling so good.”

Jaida glares at Priyanka, who has the decency to look apologetic. Then, she starts playing with Lemon’s hair until the girl lifts her head from the table, and Jaida can’t be mad anymore.

    ________________________________________________________________________   

   “What do you think you’re doing?”

Jackie’s eyes snap away from her laptop to the bedroom door, where Jan stands with her arms crossed and her sternest look.

If Jan learned that from Teresa, Jackie may have to postpone the meet-the-parents for some time. Like forever.

“Just sending an email,” she squeaks out. Although, why is she acting like a scolded child? She’s an adult with a job. “A work email,” she says, sitting up straighter on the bed, defiant.

From Jan’s look, it’s the wrong move.

Slowly, Jan walks to the bed. Jackie gulps. Jan takes the laptop and moves it to the bedside table.

“Wait—”

“There are no work emails on vacation,” Jan says, claiming the space on Jackie’s lap.

“But I—”

The protests drown in a fervent kiss that pulls moans from Jackie’s lips. Jan swallows them gladly as she tangles her hands in Jackie’s hair, pulling and messing it up. She sits her full weight on Jackie’s lap and Jackie grabs greedy handfuls of her thighs, her ass, bringing her imposible closer.

Jan pulls back just enough that she’s still sharing Jackie’s ragged breaths.

“No work on vacation.”

“Okay,” Jackie agrees, already chasing Jan’s lips again and why was she arguing at all?

The lingering warmth of the afternoon comes in through the open window. Jan’s weight is heat on Jackie’s thighs, her center is fire against her belly and Jackie needs to feel more of her skin. She tugs at the hem of her shirt until it disappears somewhere on the floor.

Jackie leaves Jan’s lips for a second to drink her in, a soft beautiful the only thing she has time to say before kissing and licking new skin. Jan generously lets her have her way, for about two seconds. They have a miracle of a half hour in an empty house, and she has ideas. Ideas that don’t include letting Jackie anywhere near her laptop. She has a better use for her hands.

Jan likes her thighs bruised, she’s learned. When she walks, she carries the slight ache of Jackie’s thumbprints with her. Now Jackie spreads her open on the bed and digs into soft flesh, marking skin untouched by sunlight, paler than the rest of Jan’s summer tan. Jackie leaves her mark high enough to hide it from everyone’s eyes but theirs. Meticulous, careful, she soothes every bruise with her tongue.

“Jackie,” Jan whines when Jackie gets too lost in her thighs without moving higher.

“Yes?” Jackie asks, faking ignorance.

Jan simply lifts her hips, frustrated.

“Say what you need, baby,” Jackie says, smiling against Jan’s thigh. At her silence, she bites.

“Hmm, please,” Jan whimpers, hips lifting again until Jackie holds her down. “I— God.” She hooks her fingers under Jackie’s jaw and makes her look up. Jan’s big pleading eyes pierce through her. “Please eat me out?”

Jackie moans and takes Jan in her mouth. Her rewards are hands pulling her hair, nails scratching her shoulders and loud whines in her ears.

“More, please.”

Jackie replaces her tongue with her fingers to speak.

“My sweet girl, so polite.” Jan’s hips stutter at the praise. “So well behaved. How many do you need, baby?”

“T-two”

Jackie lowers her mouth again and slides two fingers inside her, smoothly.

“Did you feel how easy that was?” she teases.

“Hmm, Jackie, don’t be mean,” Jan says with a shy smile.

“I love that you get this wet for me,” Jackie tells her sincerely. “It makes me feel proud.”

“All yours,” Jan whispers, her hips canting up. “I’m all yours.”

Jackie loses any semblance of composure she had. Her rhythm gets messier, she goes harder and faster until Jan’s stomach tenses and her hand wraps around Jackie’s wrist.

Jackie stills her movements. Jan’s chest heaves as they both try to control their breathing. Jackie kisses her skin tenderly, waiting for her to come down.

The hands in Jackie’s hair loosen their grip. With a gentle tug, Jan calls her up.

“Hey,” Jan greets with the dreamy smile she gets after coming. It may be Jackie’s favorite part.

“Hey.”

Jackie kisses her forehead and grabs blindly for the sheets to cover them both.

Jan brings Jackie to rest on her chest. The only noise in the whole house is their breathing, in sync with the waves. Jan traces shapes on Jackie’s back, dipping under her shirt, making her shiver.

Evening falls around them. The sky glows orange and warm and the sound of the ocean calls them to sleep. The only thing keeping Jackie awake is Jan’s hand, lifting her shirt higher and higher.

“Should we go make dinner?” Jan says, one last half-hearted attempt at being responsible.

“Hm. Later,” says Jackie, stretching up and finally taking off her shirt. Jan looks at her like the first time, like every time. “We’re on vacation.”

Jan grins.

“You learn fast.”

    ________________________________________________________________________   

  That night, Jaida bans Jan from the kitchen. This is also Jan’s vacation, after all, and Jaida will make her relax if she has to twist her arm to do it. She orders Jan to grab some beers, sit with her girlfriend on the back porch table and let her handle things.

She enlists Lemon’s reluctant and Priyanka’s much more useful help, and between the three of them they manage to have four pizzas ready to be cooked in the outdoor grill.

It’s a clear night of bright stars and crisp, cold air. They light citronella candles that flicker in the dim light of the porch, and bring the chairs outside.

The kids set the table all on their own and only need to be told twice to stop running with knives. They set pillows on their chairs to reach the table and wait excitedly for the grownups to see how they made the table so pretty, with rows of seashells and napkins folded into abstract shapes that Crystal tells them are seagulls.

The grownups flatter and praise the kids’ work while filling their plates. It takes them both five seconds to get covered in sauce.

“What are we doing tomorrow?” Jackie asks the group once every plate is empty, as she dips a napkin in water to scrub Crystal’s cheeks.

“Oooh, I wanna take surfing lessons,” says Priyanka.

“In a day?” asks Jan. “You won’t even get to the water in one day.”

“What if I’m like, super good at it? It could be my hidden talent.”

“I vote we go see Priyanka eat shit on a surfboard,” says Lemon, raising her hand.

“Changed my mind,” Jan says, “that sounds fun.”

“You’re all such haters,” Priyanka frowns, crossing her arms.

Sitting sideways on the big porch couch she dragged to the table, with her legs swinging from the armrest, Jaida watches the back and forth. With a sly glance at Lemon, she holds up her phone and tries to sneak a picture of all of them.

“Who are you texting?” Lemon says immediately.

“Nobody, shut up,” Jaida says, focused on her phone.

“Tell her we say hi,” Jan chimes in with a kind smile.

Jaida returns it.

  From: Jai

Pizza nuit!

Jai sent a picture

Jan dit bonjour

  From: Nickyyy

Horrible. Google Translate again?

Je vous aime tous beaucoup

Gigi is about to drop their glass

  Jaida rescues the glass on the edge of the table.

  From: Jai

Nous t'aimons aussi

  From: Nickyyy

Better ;)

    ________________________________________________________________________  

    Jackie never stops feeling impressed —and grateful— by how the kids pass out the second their heads touch the pillow after a long day at the beach. She barely gets through “once upon a time” and they are out.

She holds her own yawn as she climbs down the stairs to find everyone wide awake, bringing the plates and leftovers from dinner inside and talking loudly. Her chatterboxes don’t stop day or night.

Jackie thinks back to how quiet her life was not so long ago, the two-people house, her small but wonderful family with Gigi. And it was enough —Gigi would always be enough, but now Jan runs to kiss her on the stairs, leads her to the kitchen where Jaida hands her a bottle of the only beer Jackie likes and they fill the kitchen and the whole house with happy voices.

Jackie rests one arm around Jan’s shoulders and takes a swig of her beer, pressing the cold bottle on her heated temple. It’s been a long few days of pure sunshine.

“What do you think, babe?” Jan asks her, shifting to support more of Jackie’s weight.

“Hm?”

“I said we should walk on the beach!” says Jaida. “It’s gorgeous out and we’re leaving tomorrow.”

Jackie’s answer is cut off by a yawn that she tries to hide. It’s too early to be this tired. The sisters are perky as ever, and it makes Jackie feel… old.

“You should go without us, Jai,” Jan says, without taking her eyes off Jackie. “Someone should stay with the kids.”

“No, let’s go,” Jackie says. “We can leave for ten minutes. The kids’ room even faces the beach.”

Jan searches her face for insincerity, but finds nothing. She smiles.

“Okay.”

“Okay!”

Jaida hops off the counter and skips to the backdoor, the other two following suit, hand in hand. Jaida opens the door, steps outside and freezes.

Slowly, she steps back, closes the door again and turns to face Jan and Jackie.

She looks like she saw a ghost.

“Yeah, we can’t go outside,” she says.

“Why?”

“Because our little sister’s on the porch, straddling Priyanka.”

Jan’s hands fly to her mouth and she squeals.

“I don’t know if I’m more happy or grossed out.”

“Grossed out, for sure,” Jaida gags, rubbing her eyes.

“Let’s go through the front door,” Jackie whispers, trying to get them away unnoticed. “We can sneak around the house and still go to the beach.”

“Please,” Jaida shudders. “I need my eyes cleansed.”

    It gets so cold by the sea once the sun goes down. Jaida’s a Fall girl, but when she’s at the beach she expects seventy five and above all day. That’s the fantasy.

Still, it’s their last day. She takes off her shoes and gets knee deep in the water.

Behind her, Jan and Jackie speak in soft voices, drowned out by the waves.

Jaida closes her eyes. The wind deafens her, the waves rise, she shivers. There’s a strong pull from the phone in her hand that hasn’t left her side since… since.

Nicky hates getting sand in her hair, but she still would’ve followed her to the water. She would have run after the kids until she collapsed, would have sunbathed with Lemon and cooked with Jan and shared one or two smokes with Jackie outside, late at night, watching the stars.

Her absence feels louder than ever.

There are so many things Jaida could say. I miss you is too personal. You’re missed, too detached.

Why does the moon look so shitty in pictures? is just right.

It’s four in the morning in France. Jaida still stares at their chat, waiting.

“I want to come here again, in the summer,” Jan says.

“I’m in,” says Jackie, hooking her chin on Jan’s shoulder as she hugs her waist. Her eyes are closing even as she speaks. “For longer. And maybe in a bigger house.”

“Completely,” says Jan. “The seven of us in that little shoebox for more than three days? Mama, armageddon.”

It warms Jaida’s heart. She’s invited, implicitly.

She pockets her phone.

They stare at the waves for a long time, in calm silence.

“I’m freezing,” Jaida says after a while, shivering and going back to the house.

They go quietly upstairs, but Jaida stops at the door of the bedroom she’s sharing with Lemon and Priyanka.

“Take our bed,” Jackie says before Jaida can voice her concerns.

“Seriously?”

“Yeah, we can stay with the kids,” Jan says. “I noticed last night that their bed is bigger than ours. We got played.”

They bid Jaida goodnight and disappear in the bedroom.

Jaida is tired.

It was a long day, a long weekend really, and she is tired.

Jaida can’t sleep.

The bed is too big on all sides, too cold.

She used to have a queen bed at her parents’ house. Half the time, one or both of her sisters would sleep there after watching a movie or staying up talking, hiding their giggles on the pillows, trying not to wake up their parents.

Tonight, her sisters fall asleep in different beds. And Jaida is… fine. She’s fine. Hangover and all, she had a great day after a great night. It’s been a nice vacation with her favorite people, and she’s grateful, she really is.

She turns on one side, then the other. Her phone waits on the bedside table. She turns away from it and pulls the covers over her face.

      From: Nickyyy

I think you just suck at taking pictures, because look at this sunrise:

Nickyyy sent you a picture

Going to work, Jai. Send my love to everyone!

    ________________________________________________________________________

        The last day, like any last day, is melancholic. Crystal cries at the sea and tells it she will miss it, and Gigi won’t get out of the water until Jackie sets her foot down.

They stay at the beach until the last minute possible, meaning they have to rush home and finish packing in a hurry. If Jackie says so herself, she does a great job of tampering down her anxiety and not pestering everyone. Jan still squeezes her hand soothingly whenever they cross paths.

They finish quickly, even with the kids running around, even with Lemon and Priyanka busy giggling and doing googly eyes at each other. They’re packed inside the car before they know it.

“Say bye to the beach, guys.”

“Bye, beach!” the kids yell, waving with their bodies halfway out of the car window.

“See you in the summer,” says Jan, kissing Jackie’s hand as she starts the way home. “Right?”

“Yes,” says Jackie.

From the passenger seat, she can stare at Jan shamelessly, since her girl is focused on the road. She got a subtle tan and some freckles on her nose. She looks blonder. She looks perfect.

In the rearview mirror, she can see Lemon and Priyanka trying to teach Crystal the same game of hands but with slightly different rules, both arguing over which version is the “real” version. Gigi displays her new seashells to Jaida one by one with descriptions, and Jaida listens intently. Jan slides on her sunglasses and flicks on the radio, switching stations until everyone is content.

“Yes. We’ll be back.”