#jeff’s inn by the sea

[mermaidlighthouse]

A scene I NEED:

Stede: so how do we contact your ship btw?? Should we tell your crew you’re an innkeeper now?? 😊

Ed: 🧐 my ship????

Stede: 😕 yeah the one you sailed with the spikes on the rails and stuff??? The one you were on before The Revenge???

Ed: ……🙂

Stede: 😟 You do know where that ship is right?!?! Did you abandon your ship and the entire crew?!?!

Ed: 🤔 that doesn’t sound like me…why would I do that??

Stede: 😐 nevermind darling…let’s just…fix the door latch shall we? 😚

[queerfandomtrifecta]

I’m in my unhinged-fan-theories-I-know-won’t-happen era since I can’t analyze things seriously anymore because of how awful s2 was.

So that being said, I have left team Jeff’s Adorable Cringefail Inn by the Sea and am now fully on team Jeff’s Psychological Horror Inn by the Sea.

Unsuspecting guests come to stay in what turns out to be just a dilapidated little shack on a remote island run by two men in a relationship where they do anything but talk about their issues. One of them never really wanted to be there to begin with and desperately wants to leave and the yellow wallpaper probably isn’t helping, but the other’s fragile mental health is so dependent upon him that he stays; things got… hard for other people the last time he left, so he’s learned not to do that again. The corpse of a man one of them mutilated again and again and again when he was still alive is buried in the front yard… or is it? There’s clearly growing friction between them but they’re not talking about it or about the familiar rotting smell they can’t find the source of. Their guests (like their former crew) quickly learn they’d better act like everything is Totally Fine as well, if they know what’s good for them.

Like take the names out so you can’t tell what show this is and it’s an absolutely perfect setup for a psychological horror story.

Will it be canon? Apparently anything is canon if I squint hard enough and do the exact right combination of mental gymnastics to make it make sense so why not?

[wee-snek]

Ed vs Blackbeard

And why they can’t just live happily on the Revenge

When I first watched Season 1, I thought Ed liking the cashmere and wanting to go to the French party were about him wanting to be fancy and have nice things.

And like, sure, maybe he’s been told that he didn’t deserve nice things. That’s basically what his mother told him; that god decided he shouldn’t have fine things.

But with more info in Season 2, I think it was about allowing himself to be soft.

He survived for so long because he was scary pirate Blackbeard. He had to be tough, and dark, and mean, and severe. He had to play the part of Blackbeard, and that was the only kind of success and survival story he ever saw, and the only path he saw for someone born into his position.

Then he meets Stede, who enjoyed the soft side and the pirate side equally. Like, pirating was a skill he had, but it wasn’t his most valuable characteristic. He could be silly, and soft, and gentle, and relaxed - and that was maybe the first time he had had that side of himself accepted and even rewarded. He genuinely wants to be “just Ed” but that hasn’t been an option before. Even back on the ship, after Stede leaves, he is still trying to be himself and be accepted as Ed because it felt better. And maybe, just maybe, this crew will allow it.

But then fucking Izzy comes in and says that Ed has no value and deserves to die and that only Blackbeard is worthy and that soft is punishable.

And he snaps. Of course he does. He had his first taste of love and acceptance. Then Stede left (Ed was worthless) and Izzy threatened him (Ed is worthless) and Blackbeard is the only coping-mechanism he’s ever developed, so he dials it up to 11.

But he can’t be Blackbeard 100% of the time, not anymore. He’s still Ed when he’s alone. He can’t go back to the old ways, but he can’t live the life he thought Stede could give him.

So Blackbeard gets even more intense, and Ed becomes even more depressed, and we get near-fatal self-destruction.

The outcome:

What Ed needs in order to be content (and safe, and sane) can’t coexist with a continued career in piracy. It just can’t. Every time he’s forced to do violence or threaten someone or anything that’s piracy and not just sailing - his insecurity about the value of Ed-vs-Blackbeard is going to be triggered.

So we have:

option 1: hurt - Stede doesn’t want to give up piracy now that he’s getting good at it (or some other external forces that mean they can’t retire) and it causes another rift

option 2: comfort - Jeff’s Inn by the Sea and a simple life of comfort and quiet.

option 3: both - they’re planning a third season so we’re not getting a fully resolved happy ending next week.

Edit 1: I made this post about an hour before E6-7 dropped, but I really think I’m right about option 1. Ed’s trauma won’t survive continued piracy, and Stede isn’t willing to give it up.

Edit 2: just finished E7

[impossiblebird]

jeff’s inn by the sea

watercolour paint from october

[iwannabeabadrobot]

Traditionally, tragedies end with death and comedies end with weddings.

I know OFMD goes right up to the line where comedy ends and drama begins - but I have faith in David Jenkins and the writers that this season will ultimately end as a comedy.

If you think about Season 1, there was never any doubt that Stede was going to find Ed and they would be together again - they didn’t even leave us hanging with the marooned crew. It was still angsty, but it was hurts-so-good angst.

I’m sure that even if there’s uncertainty at the end of Season 2, it’ll be satisfying, and set up more anticipation for (hopefully) Season 3!

I know people are talking about Izzy dying in the finale, but I like the theory better that the Revenge will be destroyed. That would still be a “devastating loss.”

And they’ll get a hiatus between seasons to start Jeff’s Inn By The Sea!

[libraryoffangirl]

Ed and Stede keep trying to run an inn but no one is interested in the inn but they keep accidentally offering other services like they are suddenly couples councilors, a bakery, fish market, salon, sex therapists, clothes designers or whatever and they do this without realizing while also being frustrated that the inn is not successful

[yuecrafter]

All of my OFMD wooden button magnets ✨ Find them in my Etsy shop!

Side view:

[rocketrouquine]

The more I think about it, the more I NEED a season 3. Just imagine Stede picking flowers like he did when he was a kid, we follow him as he put them in vases in the rooms or on the pillows… Ed’s desk bit with Hornigold (why are you being a dick? Jeff is polite !) with him jumping on a rude client while Stede runs from the back trying to separate the fight screaming « sorry sorry ! We can offer you a cocktail if you want ! » while Ed is muttering profanities. (Or would Stede be even more agressive because they dared to annoy her baby girl ?).

And the clients whispering « this place is weird… this is weird… right ? » while observing our little gremlins in all their glorious weirdness and domestic bliss.

I NEED IT ! GIVE IT TO ME !

[plexxaglass]

I know there’s a lot of talk about how funny it will be to see The Inn being a shitshow, but what if it’s not? What if it’s insanely successful just by virtue of them being the perfect co-captains???? I’m giggling like crazy at this!!!

[nogoodninny]

Okay, so we all can agree that Ed and Stede are whim prone and Ed constantly changes his mind about what he wants to do when he grows up, and with that in mind I’ve decided to create a poll. So…

and if anyone has any other ideas they’d like to share with the class…

[mermaidlighthouse]

I REALLY REALLY want for the crew to come for a visit and Ed and Stede are like yeah we don’t really like being innkeepers tbh there’s people in our house ALL THE TIME…can we come back to the ship please? The crew jokingly grumbles but are excited about it and while Stede goes to get his half of the treasure orange, Ed’s like well we gave it a try but this place is shit and Wee John asks “Can we light it on fire?” And Stede pops his head around the door jamb and says “I’d be disappointed if we didn’t.”

[blackbeardsslutstrands]

And what am I going to be spending today doing? Creating one of Ed’s fantasies

[wow-its-me]

Happy ending where Stede and Ed move far away and change their names

Open an “Inn by the Sea”

The crew all have a place there, some come and go, some have part time jobs, some continue to have great adventures but always return like it’s home

Mary and Doug and the kids stay once in a while, they become good friends with the crew

So do others they met during their times as pirates

[humanityinahandbag]

I desperately want to see Ed and Stede roleplaying

And it's not even because I want them to have sex (and I do). But let's be honest. These two would embrace their roles like they were auditioning for a community theater play.

Lucius or Frenchie or even Olu might mention off hand how much roleplaying spiced up their love lives before explaining to their very confused captains exactly what it is.

"You play a character," Lucius would explain. "Something sexy. To spice up the moment, yunno?"

And these two would hear play a character and run an entire fucking 5k with it.

It would take them a solid 2 hours to even get to the sexy stuff, because Ed was so invested in running a professional bed and breakfast and Stede would be so enamored by Ed (Jeff) explaining why he chose lavender soap for the rooms instead of jasmine and they'd recruit some of the crew members to pretend to be guests, which ends up being really fucking awkward because Lucius expected it to be like a freaky orgy thing, but these two just genuinely wanted them to rate the services provided by Jeff's Inn by the Sea and give their opinions on whether or not they should put out orange marmalade for breakfast or raspberry jam.

"I really don't think you're understanding roleplay," Lucius will try and say.

"Hey!" Stede would snap. "Ed's doing a lovely job. You're a top rate innkeeper, darling!"

"But I think the point is like... what would happen if you showed up without money or something like that. Yunno? Like... how would you pay for the room...?"

"If he can't pay, he can't stay, man," says Ed, like it's obvious.

"Uh huh. But... you wouldn't let him offer to pay it some other way...?"

"Bro!" Ed has the audacity to look horrified. "I can't just go ahead letting people stay in rooms for a handy! I'd never make any money that way! I've got a business to run here!"

"Yeah, Lucius," says Stede. "He's got a business to run!"

"Right then," says Lucius. "My mistake."

(they get to the sexy times eventually. mostly because Ed is so incredibly turned on when Stede shows him how to fold napkins into swans, and nothing is hotter than stellar customer service.)

[myflagmeansace]

omg the potential of "Jeff's Inn by the Sea" banter between Ed and Stede 🥺

it could've gone something like this...

"Oh, hello there, sir. Welcome to Jeff's Inn by the Sea. How can I help you?"

"Yes, hello there, fair innkeep! What a fine establishment you have here. Loving your desk setup. Oh, and what a lovely boutonnière on your shirt there."

"Thank you. The owner makes us wear them."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, he can be a dick sometimes."

"Well, I'm sure he runs a tight ship, or rather inn. But I've heard it's the best one on the island."

"It is. We're booked up every night for the next four months."

"Oh, well, I hoped you might have a vacancy by any chance? You see, I'm a weary traveler with nowhere else to go and would love a place to rest my head for a bit."

"Mmm...let me check if we have anything available."

"Oka-."

"No, nothing available, sir. Sorry. But we do have an opening in four months. Our vista suite, comes with complimentary towels and a fishing equipment voucher you can use at the bar and grill next door."

"Oh well, I am rather tired. I don't think I can wait four months for a room."

"I'm sorry to hear that, sir."

"It's fine. I should've known better than to expect a fine inn like this to have any available beds to sleep in."

"I didn't say that."

"Mmm?"

"I didn't say there weren't any available beds you could sleep in."

"Oh, I thought you said..."

"Perhaps I could interest you in a different sleeping arrangement? Maybe a bed with silk sheets, fluffy pillows, and exquisite cashmere blankets?"

"Ooh, yes please!"

"You'd be sharing it, of course."

"Sharing it? With who?"

"Me."

[edscuntyeyeshadow]

the one thing I absolutely need in s3 is ed and stede just fucking around again. acting stupid together. hanging out. want them to do more of that “blackbeard’s bar and grill” roleplay shit, fueled by rhys and taika’s unstoppable chemistry. but it’s gonna be different than in s1 because now 50% of the time those roleplays will turn into a sex thing