#just curious. this isn't applicable to me at all and I am never afraid

[sergle]

about how long do you need to be the owner of a shop before dealing with customer service emails / help requests No Longer Feels like being surrounded by a pack of feral hogs. I don't have this problem I'm asking for a friend

[polyamorousmood]

hey! I hope this isn't too non-traditional of a poly situation to be sending in, but this is the only place I think I'll be able to get good advice. As a pre-ask thing, to be clear, my best friend is the love of my life, I am aroace, we're very happily in love.

So, a while ago, we were dating, and it ended pretty quickly bc he came out as aroace. I asked him a lot whether or not that was the full reason he broke up with me and he insisted that it was and if it was going to be anyone it would have been me. I figured out that I was also aroace a couple months later. Recently (about a year after we first met and started dating) he got a boyfriend. I already set a firm boundary of no talking to me about his boyfriend bc it made me have a paranoid breakdown once and I don't want to do that to him, but even just the knowledge of him existing is pissing me off so much. I can't ask him to break up with him because I would never do thst to him and I love him more than anything even if this situation is hurting me like this, but I did recently ask him how the relationship was going with him being aroace, and he said that he isn't really aroace and he just wasn't ready for a relationship with me and thinking about that makes me want to cry. I don't want something romantic with him, I'm very much aroace and very sex and sensuality repulsed, I just hate that this random guy who I don't even know and never will (I don't want to bc I know I'd end up being a dick to him if I did meet him) is somehow more important to him than me, even if he insists thst isn't how it is. Since the situation isn't changing, I really need help with dealing with the jealousy. I've tried a ton of stuff and every single time I think about him I still want to kill him. I really don't know what to do, and my therapist isn't being particularly helpful (she isn't poly tho so she doesn't have experience with weird situations)

Hi. I'm sorry you're having such a hard time with this.

I'm curious how "he got a boyfriend" went down, and why you didn't bring up your concerns about his honestly to him when he was initially talking to you about it. Or if you did, why it still... doesn't seem resolved😬.

Not to put emotions in your mouth, but it sounds like a large proportion (though certainly not all) of your issue here stems from you feeling lied to about the breakup. This would damage anyone's trust and faith in the relationship, and I think having a formal talk about why he handled it the way he did and if that will continue in your refigured relationship will really help you. Maybe he didn't lie, maybe he was genuinely confused (for example, "if I can't make a relationship work with this person I feel a deep connection with, I must be aroace!" [one year later] "yo wtf I wanna fuck this other person?")! I think you should acknowledge -- with him, if possible -- that hurt. You feel like you want to cry? So cry. Giving the feeling full expression makes it easier to work through (and the only way out is through, darling).

Be prepared to explain why it hurts so much. The betrayal, your assumption that since he was aroace y'all were on the same page and he'd functionally be your life partner, or whatever the fuck.

Aside from the advice in this post (please read it in full📖, it is all applicable here), you have a LOT of legwork🦵 to do in unpacking and deconstructing your feelings. I think this worksheet outlines how to do that well (though, you know, tweak the wording in your head, because its aimed at a more traditional romance). If done right, it will be difficult and time consuming⌛. I recommend working through the worksheet slowly, in at least two separate sessions an hour or longer each. 'Cause shit takes time to sink in. In fact, you will have to remind yourself of the things you learn doing it for weeks to come, if not longer, so don't be afraid to revisit it! There is no shortcut, but I hope you and your best friend can be on the same page and you can have support while you navigate it.

Remember, the boyfriend didn't do anything wrong. He cares about this guy you care about. Try to see him as an extra support for him, rather than competition.

Good luck out there, space cowboy. There is hope 💛 <- its a yellow heart for friendship, get it?

[the-teapot-hatter]

Okey this is for pure comedy and nothing else since this would never happen BUT-

In the Off Script AU what if MC gets a little taken of the Saintess?? Like a puppy love crush or maybe MC is just nicer to them then everyone else (aka the suitors who are trying to win over MC heart-)

Because you said in the ask about Saintess that the only characters who will be "Taken over" by them are characters that either don't affect the plot that much or at all and MC originally meant nothing to the plot (I think they still don't matter but that could have been changed)

This is great and honestly the perfect request for this AU, since it's kinda pure crack already--

Anyway, here's the ask, I hope that you enjoy! And If this isn't what you wanted, or you would like to see this with a different character, feel free to let me know and I'll make sure to write it. ^^

Malleus had a hard time keeping himself from twitching. As the Crown Prince, he couldn't afford to have a bad relationship with the Saintess. And truly, he didn't dislike Cersei. In fact, she was one of the few people he had an applicable relationship with. She was like a little sister. As such, Malleus thinks she was taking to her job of the annoying little sister a little too well.

Currently, she was feeding both (Y/n) and Grimm some of the sweets only nobles could attain, a delicacy afforded to her by her status. Maybe it wouldn't have been such a big deal, if it hadn't been for the fact that Malleus had tried to do the same thing and was denied. (Y/n) had shown no interest in him at all, yet they had no problem with Cersei cooing over them as if they were a small puppy. What exactly was he doing wrong?

"Something wrong, Malleus?" Cersei asked, a look that was much to smug settling across her features. She knew exactly what she was doing. And while Malleus was grateful that Cersei didn't have any romantic affections for (Y/n), he was still a little annoyed with the ease of which she could get close with (Y/n). At least, Malleus didn't think Cersei liked (Y/n) romantically.

"Of course not, though I am curious as to when you got so close to (Y/n) and Sir Grimm." Malleus casually spoke. (Y/n) glanced up at him with judgmental eyes, as if they could tell what he was thinking and wasn't caring for it. Malleus wasn't so sure they actually knew what he was thinking. At times, they could be incredibly perceptive, and others, they remained oblivious. In particular, they didn't seem to understand, or willfully ignored, when others had any sort of romantic interest.

"Oh! They helped fix an old tool of mine. They're incredibly smart!" Cersei cheered. Clapping her hands together. Grimm nodded, looking particularly smug.

"Thafts rifpht! I'ff fe Grutest!" Grimm spoke with food still in his mouth, but vaguely Malleus could make out an 'That's right! I'm the Greatest!'.

Contemplating to himself, Malleus wondered if (Y/n) just wasn't interested in men but rather, preferred woman. Well, there were such transformation potions that would do the work, but he isn't so sure if that would be the best political move. Hmmm.... A prospect to consider at another time.

"I've heard that (Y/n)'s skills are to be revered." Malleus lightly fibbed. While Idia had said that (Y/n) had potential, it wasn't anything that a certified professional couldn't do. But Malleus had also heard plenty of people praise (Y/n) in such a way that his Fea roots didn't stop the light fib from leaving his lips. "In fact, I would be most interested in offering you a position as one of the Palace's handyman, if you would allow (Y/n)."

(Y/n) certainly had more manners than Grimm, waiting to finish their food before speaking.

"I'm afraid I'll have to decline your gracious offer, your Highness." (Y/n) rejected, as they had many others before. Malleus couldn't help the pout that settled across his lips. And to make matters worse, Cersei jumped in with her own offer.

"I'm sure the temple could offer you a position of a handyman! None of the Priest, or Priestesses around here no what to do with most of the magical tools or anything similar." Cersei suggested. Instead of the instant rejection that Malleus had gotten, (Y/n) had paused and seemed to be considering the offer.

"I'll think about it." (Y/n) finally responded. Cersei squealed and jumped onto (Y/n) with exuberance unbefitting of a lady such as herself.

"Won't you!? Then we'll get to see each other more often!" Cersei cheered, awkwardly (Y/n) wrapped their own arms around Cersei not seeming to know what to do. A crackle of thunder roared from outside. Yes, maybe Malleus should see if that transformation potion would get him a different response.