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#just makes me feel yucky
damndude69 · 5 months
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#Been in a serious long term relationship for 5 years now & we are engaged but she is having a sexuality crisis currently &#it’s not that she’s not attracted to me but she is really leaving into her sapphic side which is great slay except I am not a woman and#align myself no where near that side of the aisle & shes throwing around the lesbian label which is like complicated & I don’t care who call#calls themselves what but my previous shitty relationship a similar issue arose & I know I’m feeling triggered by it because of my ex shit#but I really don’t like the idea that I fit into that category which like I know there are non-binary lesbians and lesbians who date#non-binary ppl#but I do not call myself no binary to the general populace & I present 100% as a man#also I hate the non-binary label for myself despite not 100% identifying as a man#idk this is just bringing up a lot of past feelings#like I am full bearded ass motherfucker like it just makes me really uncomfortable but also I don’t wanna rain on her self discovery era#I am a queer masc transexual like that’s what I identify with these days#We just never have 'relationship' issues so this is making me nauseous & I know it s the past trauma#but fucking ugh#it’s also that she low key doesn’t refer to me in online spaces so she comes across ~more queer~ which is not to say she isn’t queer it’s#just makes me feel yucky#and none of it really matters and our relationship is just our business but ugh#cryptid rants
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skylie-spiderlillis · 4 months
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Don't get me wrong, I love painland because they're the land of pain payneland dearly & I'm currently writing *multiple* fics about them.
But if I hear one more person saying shit about Crystal and saying she was gross for what she had with Charles I'll fucking scream.
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fruityumbrella · 23 days
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being a grown up w inferiority complex over a hobby nobody gafs about is so so so so utterly ridiculous. and yet.
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mollyrocker · 3 months
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never wishing upon my female mortal enemies to fall in love with your straight girl bsf as it is actually another way to kill yourself
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famewolf · 6 months
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speaking of ocd, I think I'm realizing that I truly don't have anxiety and it's literally just my ocd. im not anxious about anything until it involves me and suddenly I'm spiraling
#[static]#it's hard to describe succinctly but the anxiety I deal with nowadays is directly related to my ocd and autism#some anxiety is so easy to brush off but the ones stemming from my ocd are extremely difficult to get out from under#i'll spiral for weeks about one specific thing and ruminate on it and mentally worry and pick at it forever#it's utterly exhausting jfkdghdf some days are easier than others#and often that one thing I ruminate on becomes multiple things all stemming from the first thing#like recently it's been my car ... the thing is totally fine ... runs fine drives fine but ive been freaked out by it for the last 3 weeks#every time i go into the shop theyre like ... everything is good in fact its in good condition for its age and they'll mention like#one thing that will need to be replaced to keep it in tip top condition and then my brain will fixate on it and imagine all the ways#something horrific will happen if that doesnt get changed and then that leads to all the other things in the car suddenly freaking me out#i defs used to have general anxiety and depression but those went away literally the day i got top surgery#poof instantly gone it was wild and i kept waiting for the other shoe to drop#never did but now my ocd has been really bad the last 6 months cuz of all the extra horrifying things going on#so i thought it was just my anxiety coming back but this week i realized it was my ocd and have been treating it accordingly#and ive seen some relief but i definitely need to go back to therapy once i get my insurance again#its the only way to get a hold on it and my last therapist ended up moving states so we didnt get to work on tools for it very much#im yapping at this point i just needed to vent for a second about how truly yucky ocd makes me feel
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thescreamcorner · 2 months
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probably a take that a LOT of people are going to be angry about but I'm gonna preface with: I'm speaking on a general trend I've seen in online spaces, and my thoughts on it are not a direct callout to anyone nor an inherent indicator of if someone's DID is "real" or "fake."
but like. the way that some people will use public spaces to "chat intra-system" is so wild and even at times uncomfortable as fuck, if nothing else it's pretty wildly unsafe because like you have NO IDEA who's reading what you're writing out. Having a private discord server or a journal or a notes app or something is a much safer way to facilitate that kind of thing.
that and lowkey..... sometimes ppl doing it in public or actively sharing screenshots of it on tumblr like it's some "the group chat going wild tonight" type content just feels. So much like roleplay. It skeeves me out a bit. I know in my heart that generally using a space to try and communicate with other parts of the system is a healthy coping mechanism that a lot of therapists recommend but so many times that I see that posted it feels like that meaning and healing has been lost and in some cases borders on roleplaying or content farming and it makes me so uncomfortable
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misspermitted · 14 hours
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“Look for the strengths in yourself” this. “Your trauma doesn’t define you or make you inherently wrong” that. Do it out of spite. Value yourself out of spite.
What? Those douchebags told you that you weren’t worth anything? Fuck them! Treat yourself like you’re worth something! Get back at those fuckers!
Those assholes conditioned you into thinking you were terrible by treating you like shit? Condition yourself back! Keep valuing yourself and doing self care over and over until you drown them out. Until they’re as stupid and small in your brain as they are in real life.
Fucking win the emotional manipulation game! Win it! Draw something shit because it makes you feel happy! What, you can’t say no to people because you’re not worth as much as them? Fuck that! Say no all the time! Treat yourself like the most important person in the universe because they would hate it!
#so had a epiphany with a client the other day#essentially this#spite is the best way to do anything#and yes I’m in the mental health field#which would shock the tumblr bot who saw my blog and tried to send me to a therapy blog#which was adorable but jesus#and shocking to people who’ve commented saying I’m way to cynical about mental health and asking if I’m okay#I’m so unbelievably stable I help other people get stable lmao#it’s just sometimes the sunshine and rainbows approach works for people#and sometimes it doesn’t#and I’m just incredible super blunt about how I feel and experience things#which is sometimes yucky when it’s mental health or cptsd or my experience being neurodivergent in this society#you have points when your brain isn’t gonna believe that you’re good#that things can get better#rationally you will but emotionally your brain has conditioned itself out of hope and self regard#so sometimes you gotta motivate yourself with anger and spite#those assholes don’t deserve your life#and then you’ll get to the actual hope and happy feelings point#and then you’ll drop again#because this is how it works#and yucky emotions are not always bad or shameful#sometimes spite and anger is justified and can motivate you to change#sometime stress helps you survive#sometimes sadness helps you stop and realise somethings wrong#fuck depression though that one is just bad#(I’m kidding lmao)#seriously for me who gets depressive spirals often#and likely will for my entire life#depression feelings tells me I haven’t been making time for myself#and I’m overwhelmed
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bloodydeanwinchester · 6 months
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god i wish they'd just give up on the bab thing and let that "joke" die. not only is it not funny but also it's pretty shitty......
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usercelestial · 1 year
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where the hell is the content for butch lesbians aziraphale and crowley, i need aziraphale as a femme jazz singer and crowley as her butch bodyguard, i need crowley in a jessica rabbit style dress and heels hanging off of her bookworm butch aziraphale, i need he/they butch crowley in a dykey leather jacket clinging to he/they aziraphale in a butch waistcoat and shaved head
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eosphorusss · 2 months
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i think your internship at the eu should be automatically be terminated if you post very cheesy instagram stories
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99naive · 3 months
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im doing a tiny bit better today but tbh im still lowkey struggling upstairs today so i apologize if im a bit more quiet today . . .
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sodrippy · 3 months
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cultivating the ability to say "actually im not fucking doing this" when i have a bad dream the same way i do when i have a bad conversation
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maddogmp3 · 3 months
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i think crisis hotlines should have. shorter wait times.
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heybobbygirl · 1 year
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my mom just explained how she looks through my dad’s phone sometimes because “if you’re in a relationship and you trust each other you should be able to look through each other’s phones” and when I said that I wouldn’t be comfortable with that and the thought actually kind of scares me she just said “oh you’ll think differently if you’re really in love” so excuse me while I go up to my room and cry until I throw up because 𝓌𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒻𝓊𝒸𝓀
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putriddivine · 6 months
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i love to drink espresso and shake my arms around
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erzvolnes · 6 months
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I FUCKING HATE SHRIMPS TO EAT
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