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Not to randomly blab about BBC Sherlock, but I find it hilarious that, during their first meeting, Moriarty is like:

Moriarty: Okay, I wanna see Sherlock working on my puzzle, but I need a disguise distracting enough that he won’t suspect me. Best disguises are half truths, so I’m gonna pretend to be very very gay for him while also dating his friend

And he nails this so hard that Sherlock says “gay” out loud

I don’t think you get it. Moriarty understands how Sherlock’s brain works so well that he got it to scream “gay” immediately. Out loud. Accidentally.

We have literally never seen Sherlock do that. Before or after this moment. It’s so funny.

Petition for the scene beforehand where Moriarty spends 2 hours in the bathroom like adjusting his socks: “If I cuff them just like this he’ll definitely think I’m gay.”

Hard cut to Sherlock saying matter of factly “Please John, did you see the way he cuffed his socks? Gay.”

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Don’t forget the:

5. tranquility of a forest

6. a fire within

7. finding your centre

Then you’ll be sure to win!!

These transphobes are the saddest bunch ive ever met, and they haven’t got a clue.

Only you can make a man out of youuuu 🎵

things you DO NOT need to be a man

a dick

he/him pronouns

XY chromosomes

things you DO need to be a man

the swiftness of a coursing river

the force of a great typhoon

the strength of a raging fire

the mysteriousness of the dark side of the moon

^this post was brought to you by LGBT^

Let's

Get down to

Business

To defeat the huns

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Had a dream that Shrek came out now and people were making videos like “10 Signs that Fiona was an Ogre” and it made me realise that Shrek is actually a superb example of a plot twist. Not only do you not see it coming, but the reason you don’t see it coming (your assumptions about what a princess and what a love story is) enrich the plot and message of the movie immensely. And it’s so obvious afterwards (like, even at the intro of her character, why isn’t Fiona scared of Shrek like literally other human when they see him?? Also she’s been in a tower forever why does she even know what an ogre is? And so quickly too? Because she is one!)

Anyway another reason Shrek is a masterpiece

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Every so often I remember how cringe fail Xie Wei was and I laugh.

Seriously dude this is why she thought you supported Yan Lin over her and wanted her dead wHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU

Immaculate character. I love him

I was trying to figure out how Xie Wei is connected to Yan Lin. Are they brothers? Uncle/ nephew? Cousins?? But turns out, Xie Wei is actually Yan Lin's biological mother bc what in the boy mom kind of jealous mother in law behaviour is this???

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Having a weird computer-like pattern recognising brain is all fun and games until someone accuses you of being ChatGPT

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What? My shipping is predictable and “mainstream”? You want a weird absolutely unknown bonkers pairing??

Well, for one, being mainstream and popular has absolutely no bearing on whether something is good and TWO: the monk and the scoundrel from Diablo III

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Hey op how does it feel to be both more accurate and more funny than me in the tags of my own post

Fan Yu, a literal demon god: Humans are so beneath me and I haven’t cared about a single mortal matter in, well, ever, and-

Bai Shuo, some random human: *marches into his demon den, insults him to his face, single-handedly causes so much chaos it blows his cover, successfully blackmails him multiple times, figures out his entire plan after one interaction, literally stabs him*

Fan Yu: I’ve only had Bai Shuo for two days but if anything happens to her I’ll kill everyone in this room and then myself

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Fan Yu, a literal demon god: Humans are so beneath me and I haven’t cared about a single mortal matter in, well, ever, and-

Bai Shuo, some random human: *marches into his demon den, insults him to his face, single-handedly causes so much chaos it blows his cover, successfully blackmails him multiple times, figures out his entire plan after one interaction, literally stabs him*

Fan Yu: I’ve only had Bai Shuo for two days but if anything happens to her I’ll kill everyone in this room and then myself

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Oh my god guys Moonlight Mystique! MOONLIGHT MYSTIQUE!! Bai Lu is back and she’s playing an ambitious emotionally detached intelligent Til the End of the Moon style character without the random infantilisation and “I have to seduce him” plot line! The male lead and female lead have the shared slow burn understanding of Story of Kunning Palace without the non consensual problematic elements!!! Guys!!! Competent strong and flawed female character with equally strong flawed male character!!! Low-key a kind of healthy relationship already!!!!! This is not a drill!!!!!!!!

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RIP Lydia Bennet you would’ve loved watching tik toks at full volume in public

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This is hella amazing OP! Those AI recreations piss me the hell off and I love how you got the skin tone accurate. I really love the recreation of the necklace as well because it is so accurate. And also the neck area being a little off is actually really awesome as I’ll explain a little later on this infodumping journey.

I’m sure youre a little aware haha but as an insane Egypt quasi-historian (emphasis on the “quasi”: please god someone who knows more correct me if I screw any of this up) I wanna disclaim for everyone that Nefertiti’s bust is not an accurate depiction of what she looked like. Neither are any ancient Egyptian busts or reliefs. And here’s why!

It all comes down to language. You know how ancient Egypt had all the hieroglyphs right? Which is a pictographic language? Well even though most people in Egypt weren’t literate enough to read sentences, they could actually broadly understand the meanings of most hieroglyphs engraved on temples because it’s a pictographic language, and ancient Egyptians were very very familiar with their own iconography. We know this because religious objects every day people used would actually purposefully be moulded to represent they hieroglyphic symbol (like a snake would look like the hieroglyph for that rather than an actual snake). Part of this relationship with language, is that ancient Egyptians thought hieroglyphs held immense physical power, because they were icons of concepts right, and could kinda summon them. It’s kinda like how Catholics wear crosses as icons of Jesus’ protection, right? So ancient Egyptians would do things like scratch the teeth off crocodile hieroglyphs so they wouldn’t be dangerous, etc.

Essentially ancient Egyptians are very iconographically focused, and use imagery as language and to summon concepts. You get me? Now you’ll notice, if you’ve seen some Egyptian art, that every single pharaoh usually looks the exact same, right? For example:

This is the Namer palette which shows (allegedly) the first pharaoh of Egypt “smiting his enemies”

This is a block which shows Ramses II, created over 1500 years later, also smiting his enemies.

Generally the depiction of pharaohs always stays the same. This isn’t because they all looked the exact same, it is because this is the icon of a pharaoh. This one specifically is the “smiting” icon and communicates to any ancient Egyptian that this is the pharaoh being better than his enemies. Egypts domination over other states. Etc.

Now there are slight variations, and you’ll notice this in my example. And Egyptologists go crazy over those. But the general rule we’re doing is that portraits of pharaohs were not supposed to show what they looked like. That didn’t matter. It was supposed to use icons to communicate a message. That was more important.

Was this the same for queens? Yes. I used pharaohs as my example because it’s the most prominent but all art did this. Even private tombs show all men with dark skin and this build, wearing the specific dress of their job (for example, a priest would have a cap and be in all white). Because the images were a language with which you communicated your personality traits, and summoned the concepts you wanted to be associated with, not lifelike depictions. It’s pretty awesome tbh

Now the thing that’s really cool about Nefertiti’s Bust is that it is lifelike. It’s not stylised. This is super weird and because it comes at one of the very rare periods in ancient Egyptian iconography where there is a massive shift: The Amarna Period. Amarna Period art has a lot of fun stuff and one of the things is an increase in highly detailed sculpture.

However, this change in iconography is often interpreted by people as a sudden shift to people depicting royals as they looked. This is absolutely not confirmed and, in my opinion, highly unlikely and a sad simplification of the really complex iconographic changes going on.

For example, some people on Tumblr may be familiar with the Amarna Period’s pharaoh and Nefertiti’s husband Akhenaten. Mainly because there are many head canons that he was trans or gender neutral, and changed his iconography to reflect this. This is because he often depicted himself like this:

Now not to say that he wasn’t trans, there’s really no evidence either way, but saying that this was just a realistic depiction really undermines the gender iconography he was playing with. I literally know people who’ve written theses on that. Moving the pharaoh from a strong war figure to reminiscing gender neutral gods like the god of the Nile who are about daily life and nurturing and nature.

Where does Nefertiti fit into this? Well when not in hyper realism her depictions looked like this:

You’ll notice how Nefertiti’s bust has very sharp features and an abnormally long neck (which the AI fixed) and very defined eyes? This all fits into the “Amarna style” of depicting humans as almost elongated. A style which was very purposefully coordinated and carried out across the entire empire and applied to literally everyone including in private tombs and nobles portraits.

Nefertiti’s iconography specifically also tells a really interesting story. She is often depicted wearing the blue crown with a snake, like in the bust. This is HUGE because normally only the pharaoh had a snake on his crown, as it represents imperial power. Nefertiti’s iconography often did things like this, given her iconographic power that queens usually never had. For example there also depictions of her riding a chariot alone, a hieroglyph communicating pharaonic military command! There is also evidence from letters that she had authority over diplomatic relations including peace treaties and foreign conquest. Possibly taking a strong military role that Akhenaten’s iconography was leaning away from.

This is also shown in her dress: attention is drawn to her shoulders in almost all depictions, including that neck piece on her bust. This gives her a silhouette more reminiscent of the masculine top heavy shape then the usual shapes associated with women. The same one Akhenaten leaned away from.

Another awesome thing about the bust is her skin colour! Skin colour was a huge iconographic communicated in ancient Egypt. Every nation pretty much had a different shade. Within ancient Egypt, men would always be a red shade to reflect that they did manual work, while women would be a lighter shade to reflect that they stayed inside. You’ll see this in one of the statues of Nefertiti I included above.

However, Nefertiti’s bust shows her as having darker skin than normal women! A man’s skin tone! Some historians have speculated this is because she was a foreign princess from Nubia (modern day Libya) - but there is actually not a lot of evidence for this and in my opinion the reason it’s still a theory is because of racism. Some lovely British archaeologists have suggested that she’s the one who “corrupted” Akhenaten with thoughts of other “exotic” religions. So that’s nice.

In general, Nefertiti’s interpretation has been very fraught with sexism and racism. Which is largely prompts by this bust. In my opinion, the reason that egyptologists and Egypt fanatics are so attached to this bust being realistic and modelling Nefertiti’s face off of it is because the first guy who found it “fell in love with nefertitis amazing beauty” from it. So people really want it to be real so they can get off on the concept of this woman, I guess. She is very pretty I suppose. But they love to model her to look even more stereotypically attractive like with makeup and stuff, even before AI. She’s like mythically gorgeous or some shit. You can tell I’m not a fan.

“Oh but Nefertiti’s mummy” ALLEGEDLY Nefertitis mummy. I’m very much on the side that it’s not, personally, but Professor Aiden Dodson goes into that far better than I could. More on topic, literally every mummy looks the same. As OP briefly mentioned. You can get an idea of face structure and possible wounds, yes. But all the fat is gone, all the internal organs are gone. Like this is (TRIGGER WARNING) Nefertiti’s mummy:

And this is another, male, mummy:

Now you can get a little bit of the facial features but most of it is very very obscured. Funerary archaeologists can get guesstimations about what someone maybe looked like, but that is it. 3D modelling of people is incredibly unreliable for historical fact ESPECIALLY in ancient Egypt and I wish people would stop wanting to make a model of how beautiful Nefertiti was in real life because it does not matter. What matters is that she was awesome.

That’s not a diss on you OP though because I’m sure Nefertiti would appreciate you making a modern version of the iconographic message that she was powerful and awesome.

(Also btw the crown texture is already amazing but if you’re messing with it more, off the top of my head I think crowns were generally made with something textured quite similar to paper machet and then covered with paint. Very fancy paint though like gold based gilded paint and then the blue was lapis lazuli crushed? I think? You’d have to check me on that. But there’s definitely research out there on it, if that would help with the texture hehe)

So, I saw this image on Facebook, and it was supposedly showing what Queen Nefertiti would have looked like in real life:

Now, I thought this AI generated garbage was just truly terrible on a number of levels; first off, she looks wayyyyyy too modern - her makeup is very “Hollywood glamour”, she looks airbrushed and de-aged, and as far as I’m aware, Ancient Egyptians didn’t have mascara, glitter-based eyeshadows and lip gloss. Secondly, her features are exceptionally whitewashed in every sense - this is pretty standard for AI as racial bias is prevalent in feeding AI algorithms, but I genuinely thought a depiction of such a known individual would not exhibit such euro-centric features. Thirdly, the outfit was massively desaturated and didn’t take pigment loss into consideration, and while I *do* like the look of the neck attire, it's not at all accurate (plus, again, AI confusion on the detailing is evident).

So, this inspired me to alter the image on the left to be more accurate based off the sculpture’s features. I looked into Ancient Egyptian makeup and looked at references for kohl eyeliner and clay-based facial pigment (rouge was used on cheeks, charcoal-based powder/paste was used to darken and elongate eyebrows), and I looked at pre-existing images of Nefertiti, both her mummy and other reconstructions. While doing this, I found photos of a 3D scanned sculpture made by scientists at the University of Bristol and chose to collage the neck jewellery over the painting (and edited the lighting and shadows as best as I could).

Something I see a lot of in facial recreations of mummies is maintaining the elongated and skinny facial features as seen on preserved bodies - however, fat, muscle and cartilage shrink/disappear post mortem, regardless of preservation quality; Queen Nefertiti had art created of her in life, and these pieces are invaluable to developing an accurate portrayal of her, whether stylistic or realistic in nature.

And hey, while I don't think my adjustments are perfect (especially the neck area), I *do* believe it is a huge improvement to the original image I chose to work on top of.

I really liked working on this project for the last few days, and I think I may continue to work on it further to perfect it. But, until then, I hope you enjoy!

Remember, likes don't help artists but reblogs do!

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Actually, I know damn well Darcy never sat down and thought about marrying Lizzie. If he had, it would have been a week before he was rounding up Bingley, sitting him down, and looking him in the eye like he was about to propose high treason and going, "Jane. You still down bad for her?"

Coin toss whether Bingley would actually get to answer before Darcy turned around and flipped over a whiteboard like

and launched right into the most detailed migration pattern known to Regency England to keep the extraneous Bennets as contained as humanly possible by rotating them between various Bingley/Darcy estates. Like, we're talking about trading them off for minor holidays a decade out kind of detailed.

"If you and Jane take them for Lady Day ten years hence, Elizabeth and I will take them for Michaelmas. We'll all be together for Christmas and Midsummer, so we'll divide the responsibility individually on those days."

This would be followed by thirteen different spreadsheets projecting joint expenditures so Bingley knows what sort of financial commitment he'll be shouldering and how to minimize it, what proportion Darcy will take care of, what the estate plans are in case Darcy predeceases anybody, when they should probably roll out various stages to keep it from affecting their respective sisters' ability to maximize their own husband-hunting--whole nine yards.

Darcy does not know that he'll probably be murdered when the Bingley sisters find out why he asked for their social calendars. He'd be marginally fine with that at this point, because the fucking Napoleonic War campaigns were not as meticulously planned as his roadmap to getting the other three Bennets satisfactorily married, and Darcy feels about as able as if he'd spent the last year on Elba.

It takes Bingley a few minutes to realize why this is happening, then he's like

"You proposed to Elizabeth?! Congratulations!"

Darcy... knew there was something he was forgetting.

That man would have kicked the Collins's door open with four binders tucked under each arm, dumped them in a pile in front of Elizabeth, and loudly announced that if they get married tomorrow he can have her entire family except for Jane extraordinary renditioned to the Scottish moors by Sunday and then been like

"Why are you yelling at me?! I promise you, it will work! You'll never see anyone in your family except for Jane again, I swear it!" when she starts yelling at him.

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I'm rereading Pride and Prejudice for like the hundredth time and I love how it still makes me laugh out loud and feels like something new

Like look at this, how sassy is Fitzwilliam Darcy?🤣

I am living for that italics all

The only one sassier then him is Jane Austen herself...

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*to the tune of “When Will My Life Begin”, Tangled*

And then I’ll sketch

Maybe stretch

Commit a crime

Sew a dress

And then I’ll raid a brook

If I have time to spare

I’ll paint the walls with blood

I’m sure there’s room somewhere!

And then I’ll brush and brush and brush and brush my hair

Killing the same way I’ve always been

And I’ll keep wandering wandering wandering wandering

When will my life begin!

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Iconic of them to escape being a victim of anything by becoming terrible, terrible people.

Hannibal

2.10 “Naka-Choko”

3.03 “Secondo”

Parallels

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Sometimes when you think “I’m terrible and everything I do sucks” you gotta sit down and unpack that.

And SOMETIMES you just need to actually go to sleep