#kathleen in particular has said she regrets that

[21stc3nturyd1gitalb0y]

turns out, i fit in pretty well with the riot grrrls because i, too, enjoyed angrily screaming about womanhood. the difference that went over my head at the time was that, generally, most of them hated being girls due to sexism, and i hated being a girl due to gender dysphoria.

ill never forget the angry punk girls who made me who i am, even as i outgrew a subculture that centered femininity. they helped me survive my teenage years, and ill always be grateful for the introduction to intersectional feminism

[vague-humanoid]

In the past, Aniston said, “you could joke about a bigot and have a laugh — that was hysterical. And it was about educating people on how ridiculous people were. And now we’re not allowed to do that.”

“There’s a whole generation of people, kids, who are now going back to episodes of Friends and find them offensive,” she continued. “There were things that were never intentional and others… well, we should have thought it through — but I don’t think there was a sensitivity like there is now.”

Friends has seen a resurgence in popularity in recent years thanks to the show’s availability on streaming platforms like Netflix. At the same time, however, it has been criticized for its lack of diversity and for its treatment of LGBTQ+ characters. The series rarely featured people of color in prominent roles, and cultural critics have noted a consistent undercurrent of homophobia in the show’s portrayal of two recurring lesbian characters and in jokes about the show’s male leads, particularly Matthew Perry’s character Chandler.

The show also consistently made a punchline out of Perry’s character’s transgender parent, frequently misgendering the character, who was initially played by a cis male actor in early seasons and later by Kathleen Turner. Both Turner and series co-creator Marta Kauffman have expressed regret about the way the character was handled.

As mentioned, Aniston’s comments come as she’s promoting Netflix’s Murder Mystery 2. The streaming giant has also faced criticism in recent years for platforming comedy specials from Dave Chappelle and Ricky Gervais that featured transphobic jokes. Both comedians have blamed so-called “cancel culture” for criticism of their transphobic comments.

Aniston’s assertion that jokes about bigots educate people and reveal the absurdity of bigotry is also worth noting. Research has indicated that satirizing bigotry rarely changes people’s attitudes, and authors Malcolm Gladwell and Jonathan Coe have argued that laughing at satirical portrayals of political problems like bigotry can actually diffuse the discomfort with them that could lead to actual political action.

Aniston’s comments suggest an anxiety on her part about what can and cannot be said in a comedic context that echoes Chappelle and Gervais’s rage against “cancel culture.” But that anxiety neglects the way comedy functions, and in particular what the undercurrents of homophobia and outright transphobia on Friends implied about queer and trans people. The show’s jokes about Chandler, Ross, and Joey’s casual discomfort with queerness, their frequent panic at being considered gay, may have—as Aniston implied—been intended to reveal how ridiculous homophobia is.

But those jokes also normalized that discomfort, portraying it as harmlessly laughable rather than toxic. The show did little to dismantle the notion that queerness is shameful, instead making its 90s audience comfortable with laughing it off rather than interrogating why grown men would be so fearful of being considered gay.

Friends’ treatment of Chandler’s transgender parent was even worse, consistently portraying her as an oddity, a freak, someone whose experience of herself and the world could never be understood by “normal” cisgender people.

What we laugh at and why matters. Is it so much to ask that comedians take that into account, that they be more “careful” with their comedy?

Kids these days—to recklessly paraphrase Aniston—are right to be uncomfortable with the way Friends handled queerness. They’re perhaps more aware of the impact that type of careless humor can have on attitudes toward the LGBTQ+ community, and perhaps allowing for that discomfort—rather than laughing it off, rather than dismissing it as just a joke—will lead to more positive social impact.

this is alll true, but also fails to mention freinds is literally a white ripoff of a black show, and thus is inherently racist by its existence

[yel-halansu]

Vulcan polytheism

Vulcans, in spite of priding themselves on their logic, are also very invested in preserving their ancient traditions, and religion is no exception to this. Dating back to pre-Surakian times, Vulcan religion recognizes multiple deities and spirits of nature that populate the different areas of oT'Khasi. The beliefs of Vulcan religion are not shared exactly by every individual Vulcan, with some gods being worshiped exclusively in certain areas or social groups, and some Vulcans choose to not practice any religion at all.

It is worth noting that even though Surak has an immense influence in Vulcan culture and possessed many traits that could be considered messianic, he is not worshiped as a god. Spiritual practices connected to Surakian teachings, such as meditation, are non-theistic in nature.

Most of the practices of Vulcan religion take place away from the prying eyes of outworlders, however, we do have information about the main deities and spirits that populate its pantheon and legends:

T'Vet: a warrior goddess, still worshipped in some communities in Vulcan in spite of the prevalent pacifist philosophy of Surakian teachings.

Shariel: god of death, who lived in mount Tar’hana, where he spewed lava to terrify the Vulcans into submission. Legends say that he wielded the Pillar of T’Klass as a weapon to battle the other gods in defense of Sha Ka Ree.

Khosarr: god of war and consort of the goddess Akraana.

Akraana: goddess and wife of Khosarr. It is unclear what she presided over, but it is known that in ancient times her followers excluded themselves from the rest of Vulcan society and lived in self-sufficient colonies in the area of T’paal.

Natara: god of water.

Reah: ancient goddess of the underworld, of death, and bereavement.

Ny'one and T'Priah: god and goddess of fertility, respectively: joined forever in a mystical union.

We also have records of a goddess of the sun, who is said to be woken every morning by her twin sons, and who was worshiped by a sect called Krah-jehl at the temple of T’rinsha; as well as other gods of peace and war who appear depicted in the Stone of Gol.

Some of the nature spirits of Vulcan legend include:

Rushan: Air spirits.

Gratan: Desert spirits.

Fletan: Water spirits that inhabit certain oases.

Giidas: Guardian spirits.

Sirshos'im: Fire spirits that attract lost desert travelers to devour their souls.

In addition to the wider pantheon, Vulcan religion also recognizes a small group of five figures known as the Ka-ta-pak or Inner Chorus. These are personifications of the strong emotions that can grip the Vulcan heart and lead to destruction if allowed to run unchecked, and different schools of meditation teach how to deal with them in different ways. Each of them has a joyful aspect and a wrathful aspect, symbolizing how emotions can become destructive if not dealt with appropriately:

Tel-alep: also known as the Watcher, he represents curiosity. He is an old Vulcan chained to a great book that contains all the knowledge in the world. His counterpart is Alep-tel, the Bitter, who is jaded by all the experience he has accrued and eager to give advice tainted with cynicism and futility.

Kir-alep: represents peace and acceptance. Its counterpart is Alep-kir, the Sullen, who represents apathy and pessimism. It is represented as the heat of the high desert that drains the energy from the body.

Valdena: the personification of love, joy and beauty. She is portrayed as an athletic maiden dancing between the clouds. Her counterpart is Dena-vel, the Covetous. She traps the things she loves so that only she may enjoy their beauty, and, at the slightest sign of betrayal, she turns into an a'lazb (a Vulcan creature similar to a Terran spider) and drinks the blood of the object of her affection until they're dead.

Kal-ap-ton: represents grief. Usually depicted as a tall, gaunt young man in mourning attire who carries a small pouch full of tears. His counterpart is Tyr-al-tep, the Unforgiver, who makes Vulcans forget about what is and brood only on the possibilities of what might have been. He personifies the inability to let go of the past, and is said to voice any deep regrets that a particular Vulcan may have by whispering into the ears.

Ket-cheleb: also known as the Destroyer and the Blood-Drinker. He is the only figure in the Ka-ta-pak who does not have a joyful counterpart, as he is said to have killed him long ago and hung him on a great tree in the center of the world. He is thought to be the most dangerous, as the Vulcan mind is easily seduced by his cries, and it requires willpower to keep him at bay.

Vulcan polytheism is also the source of many myths, like the famous legend of Sha Ka Ree or the Great Oasis, a paradise at the center of all creation. Much like some cultures on Earth, Vulcans associated certain deities to the planets in their solar system and the constellations they could see in the night sky.

I leave you with this video, a beautiful legend about T'Kai, a trickster figure in Vulcan mythology.

Sources: Memory Beta, Memory Alpha, TAS, VOY, Star Trek V: The Final Frontier, Orion Press Lexicon, The Way of Kolinahr: The Vulcans, Hidden Universe Travel Guides: Star Trek: Vulcan, VLD, Kathleen Reynolds' Youtube Channel.

[vangoddamn]

Blind spot

You had always loved Van, weather it was because he had been your best mate since you were 15 or the way he was so passionate about music and life in general. You had first met Van when you got your first job at the local vinyl shop, Van and his mates being the regulars it became routine seing them every other day after school. Whole Saturday’s would be spend looking at the new stock deliveries and whole Sunday’s spent laying on the floor of your bedroom listening to the newly purchased vinyl.

It was a Saturday night and you and Van were listening to the new Oasis album ‘Dig out your soul’ .

It was an easy crowd to fit into and your new social group consisted of wherever Van was. This meant the boys from the band and Larry quickly became your favourite people. The shared interest in photography meant Bob and you would happily go on excursions together in the last hours of the day to catch the sunset. Benji shared your flare and obsession with all things geeky, and Star wars nights were an often occurance with Van falling asleep on your shoulder complaining about how it confused him. 

On this particular day he was supposed to be out with his sleazy girlfriend Kathleen, which in all honesty you despised. It might have been the fact that you had loved Van for so long and had to watch him with other girls, making you physically hurt. Or the fact she had from day one made up her mind to be overly clingy infront of you with Van and try get him away from you, knowing that we clearly had a better bond than she ever did. But instead he was still on the floor of your bedroom head on your belly as you were both layed down.

"Van?" You spoke up, pondering slightly over your words, trying to choose carefully. You didn't want him to go, but you felt guilty if you didn't remind him.

"yes y/n?" He mumbled, his voice going up at the end and the vibrations going through your stomach, making you tingle.

"shouldn't you be headin' off like, cause Kathleen an all?" Your voice was hardly convincing, you always used her full name in spite, but you tried your best to sound the least bitter about it as possible.

You didn't really know the answer you were expecting but it wasn't what was about to happen, and you didn't expect how you'd react. He rolled onto his front and crawled up to your face, only inches away, whispering. "oh yeah I broke it off with her" before kissing your forehead and snuggling into your neck and hugging round your waste.

This was your usual hold when one of you needed comforting. He did it when Andy broke up with you and you did it when he broke his leg and was in hospital for 38 hours and this time for some reason you got the impression he was trying to comfort me.

You were a little confused, the fact he was infactuated with her a week ago was baffling. How had you not heard about this yet either, you were his best friend and stuff travels like wild fire in this town. You tried hard to push the thoughts out of your head but you were so confused.

With a huff you sat up, looking at him with a puzzled face. "Why?" You didn't mean to sound annoyed but you were a little.

He was always going out with girls, yes some were annoying, but you tried so much to like them. Sometimes you got the feeling you tried more than him. But it was agonising to just watch him, girl after girl, when you had been right there all along and he never batted an eyelid. People said you had him wrapped round your finger but it really didn't feel like it then.

"y/n, love listen I need to talk to ya" he chuckled trying to calm you down, not really working.

"no, I think I'm going to go out for a bit" you mumbled getting up, you felt tears in your eyes daring to show themselves and you didn't want Van to see.

"y/n, this is your house!" He called after you, but you both respected each others boundaries, so he didn't run after you.

You weren't sure why you were so upset, you told Van how much you hated Kath every time you got onto the subject. Maybe it was the fact you'd have to be introduced to another girl, in say a week. He never gave time for you to grieve or prepare your self at least. He didn't understand how deeply you wanted him and how much it hurt to just watch him with girls he didn't really like, or that didn't even know him.

It was getting dark and cold and you regretted your sudden outbreak. The streets of Llandudno could get anyone lost, but after many midnight strolls, or tipsy walks home you knew it off the back of your hand.

You decided after careful consideration where to go. His house wasn't too far from where you had strayed, and he knew all about your feelings, well so did anyone who payed attention to you long enough. You could still feel tears rolling down your face, hot and burning your cheeks. You gave the door a couple of knocks, waiting for any sign of life. Thankfully it was Bob who answered, it would be embarrassing if it had been his mum.

"y/n," he cooed bringing you to a tight hug. "Guessing he told you then?" He mumbled into you head, pulling you into the house. His affections made tears poke out again only allowing you to nod into the embrace.

He sat you down at the end of his bed, cautiously sitting in front of you.

"why can't he just like me back," you whispered. "I know this looks stupid, cause he's just broken up with her but, I just know that I'll have to get used to someone else next week and it's never me," you managed to get the words out between breaths.

"oh come'ere" he said pulling you into a big bear hug, the best type. "You know better than I do that he loves ya, did he get to finish what he was telling you"

"no" you murmured, shaking your head feeling sorry for yourself.

"y/n he loves you, you need to talk to him" you'd heard it a thousand times from everyone around you so it wasn't hard to brush it off anymore.

"in a way friends usually do, then yes he loves me. But he never has a problem asking someone out who isn't me so whats going wrong there"

"your his best mate" he replied, stern as if he was telling off a child for not knowing the answer.

"exactly, I guess I should count myself lucky! At least I've got that going for me!" You huffed, voice slightly raising.

"y/n calm down come'ere it's ok, it will all work out" you wished you could believe him and at that moment you had to, so gave into his arms.

You spent around an over at his trying to calm down, Bob trying to convince you that Van loved you back. So when you left you had a glimmer of hope that Van might not be too quick to get another girlfriend.

It was completely dark outside now, the small seaside town pitch black except for the odd street lamp or glow from a window, even the pubs were dulling down now. You expected to walk home and snuggle into bed, so with your sleepy expectations that's what you started to do.

Your room was dark, assuming Van had gone home, you switched the dim lamp on your desk on and walked to your dresser under the window. Pulling out an over sized t-shirt and drawing the curtains closed you started to undress. Pulling your t-shirt over you head and dragging off your jeans, throwing them in the drawer you'd gotten your shirt from.

You would've started to take your underwear off but someone's touch stopped you. Your body froze like earlier, except this time you were half naked and about to cry. You knew it was Van by the way his calloused fingers felt on your bare stomach, cuddling around you.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know you liked Kath that much" he joked pulling a small smile from your lips, he was warm unlike the sharp breeze outside and it seeped into you.

"I'm going to miss her" you murmured back, officially confused to what was going on, but going along with his joke. He placed a kiss to your neck before taking a deep breath in and out, was this still part of the joke? His actions making you tingle every where imaginable with nerves and slight attraction. Fuck what was he doing.

"y/n, don't lie" you let a huff preparing for what you might say next.

"Van, I don't think you know how hard it is for me to just watch you go from woman to woman totally blind spotting me every time. I don't think you know how much it hurts each time you go for a girl that isn't me." You let go of your emotions like a balloon in the wind. Just watching it float off and settle in the atmosphere around you.

You expected him to pull away, confused and a little dazed. But his arms wrapped tighter around your bare waist and a feathery kiss was placed on your shoulder blade, resting his head against your back.

"love, I'd never blind spot you," he whispered against your skin, before kissing again along your back, up your collar bone and to your jaw. Each kiss was delicate and carefully placed with intent.

"vaaan..." you weren't sure what he was doing. "please, I don't think you know what your doing,"

"y/n" he murmured on you skin, turning you around to face him " I know exactly what I'm doing and I've wanted to do this for a while now" your heart sank as soon as the words reached your ears, face still in shock as he giggled at you.

"what?" The only word that could form in your mouth.

"love, I've wanted you ever since I met you" he was smiling, a cheeky grin plastered on his face, as if he'd just been given the answer to something he'd been trying to figure out for a while. He moved a strand of hair behind you ear, kissing your cheek where the strand had hidden the skin.

His hands were still holding your waist firmly, but this time smiling down at your body, making you even more nervous. But before you could escape and try to think through the things he'd just told you, he placed his lips firmly on yours. Stopping you from leaving the situation and putting a warm blanket over your mind that made you feel safe.

You had always felt safe with Van, and even though at this moment in time he had you on the edge, he was also that friend telling you it'll all be ok.

His lips were soft against your chapped, but he smiled into the kiss. Your mind so overwhelmed and nervous you couldn't help but focus, making sure you were kissing perfectly, no room for error. You'd dreamt of kissing him before and you didn't want to let him down and for it to never happen again.

But then he pulled back and you were even more scared. "Relax love, jump up" he guided you up onto your dresser with his hands under your ass. Your legs wrapped around his waist your arms resting on his shoulders casually.

He once again leant in and kissed you, this time softer, testing the waters and taking it slow. His hand tracing patterns into your skin soothed you and made you relax into him. Making you able to enjoy his touch, the way his tongue glided effortlessly against yours and how you seemed to fit together perfectly.

The passion grew deeper and so did your need for his touch, having been without it for so long.

[alj4890]

A Second Chance

(Thomas Hunt x oc*Amanda)

A/N Rachel is hosting a Halloween/Farewell party at the Hunt home. Thomas continues to struggle with keeping true to his plan with Amanda. A discovered memento from their past helps things begin to change. 

@lxaah11 @alleksa16 @penguininapinktuxedo @blackcoffee85 @stopforamoment  @hopefulmoonobject   @krsnlove   @annekebbphotography @hopelessromantic1352 . @sunflowergirl05  @desireepow-1986 @greywitchyshots @lilyofchoices @moodyvalentinestories @emceesynonymroll @my-heart-beats-for-ya @aworldoffandoms @ab1901  @flyawayboo @i-bloody-love-drake-walker . @trappedinfandoms  @kate-mckenzie @cordoniaqueensworld @everythingmarvelsherlockspn​

Masterlist

Catch up here with Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Thomas’s house and backyard were filled with those that Rachel, Addison, and Holly deemed needed to be part of the party.

Why this many people needed to be part of saying goodbye and celebrating Halloween was beyond his comprehension.

He wished this last week in Hollywood could have been spent more with his pursuit of Amanda than having her be mixed up in the party details as well as caring for Kathleen. He had even been denied their late-night conversations once their daughter was asleep. Rachel ended up dragging her off for more party planning or some type of girl talk.

Kathleen had only been sick for a few days much to everyone's relief. He and Amanda spent hours with her, keeping her comfortable and happy. The fourth day had seen her going from room to room, smiling as she woke them up.

His eyes found his daughter as she laughed while being chased by Addison and Matthew's son, Michael. The two were close in age and had seemed to hit it off as soon as they met.

He doubted anyone would be unable to like his daughter. She was kind and rarely showed disinterest in anything. When she had complemented Michael on his Lego creations, he had fallen immediately for her. Thomas could already see the matchmaking glint in Addison’s eyes.

He searched through the crowd for the other lady in his life. Thomas lifted his glass and took a gulp of whatever Halloween punch his brother-in-law had given him  when he found Amanda.

Her hair was pulled up to help combat the balmy evening. The wine colored dress she was wearing drew his eyes further down her figure.

He wanted to walk over and put his arm around her. Press a kiss to her cheek. Whisper how desirable she looked. How he couldn't wait until the party was over to have her all to himself.

"You're scaring the children."

He didn’t bother to hide his irritation. "Rachel, shouldn't you be flittering about as a hostess or something?"

His sister rolled her eyes. "I know you don't usually enjoy parties but what has Amanda done to have you staring at her with such a scowl?"

"Nothing at all." He turned away from the one that he could not cease thinking of.

Rachel studied him quietly. "I need to ask a favor from you."

"What is it?" He asked, setting his empty glass down.

"I forgot to set out some bottles of wine. Is there any chance you would be willing to share some from your collection?" She asked.

"Of course." He muttered. "Any particular kind?"

"A few bottles of red and white should be sufficient." She told him.

"I'll go see what I can find." He took off back to his house.

Rachel waited another few minutes after he disappeared inside and hurried over to Amanda.

"Hey." She said, a touch flustered. "Sorry to interrupt."

"Is something wrong?" Amanda asked when the actor she had been talking to excused himself to mingle.

"I forgot to bring up some wine from Thomas's cellar." She explained. "I promised Kathleen that I would help her, and the other kids paint their pumpkins." She hesitated. "Any chance you could go pick out a few bottles for us?"

"Sure." Amanda paused. "I think I remember the way."

Rachel smiled at her. "I hope you do.”

***************

Thomas had designed his wine cellar much like he had the rest of his house. It reflected his love of the classics. It had a corkscrew staircase that was hidden behind a cupboard in his kitchen. With a click, one could begin their descent underneath his home and into a room made of gray stone.

There were two areas of his cellar. One was the main room that housed most of the wines he kept on hand for company and such. Then a smaller room was to the right. Inside was a table, a couple of chairs, and the bottles of wine that were special for one reason or another.

Most in that room were either exceptionally expensive or some of his personal favorites.

There was a bottle in there that wasn't necessarily expensive. It also wasn't one that he had ever tasted.

But it did have his and Amanda's initials scratched on the label.

Thomas didn't know why he went in there and pulled it out first. He ran his thumb along the label and thought back to the first trip he had ever taken with Amanda.

They had decided to go on an extended weekend trip to Napa Valley.

His lips curved as he recalled how that trip had not gone at all as planned. The two flat tires along the way had been an omen of what was to come. Their hotel reservation had been lost and, due to four weddings being held, they had been forced into staying at a rather questionable lodge.

Thomas could still remember that the only way to have hot water in the shower was to turn the sink's cold water tap on.

The room next door to theirs had a couple that was not only on their honeymoon, but were exceptionally vocal about their time alone.

And somehow, through all the snags, Amanda had laughed and made him see the endless humor in their situation.

While out on their last evening and after a terrible dinner, they had stopped along the way at a little out of the way store and she purchased a bottle of white wine.

"Why are you buying that particular Riesling?" He asked.

"The label." Amanda replied. She pointed at how it had been placed on crookedly and been scratched in some places. "I think we should have a memento of our first vacation together." Her lips had trembled with mirth. "Much like this bottle, it has been put through the wringer. Yet," she her smile softened, "it has something pleasant inside that makes it all worth it."

"It could taste horrible." He countered.

"It could." She agreed. "But I bet it tastes nice." She slipped her hand into his. "Probably very sweet."

He had swept her into his arms and kissed her outside the shop. Once back in their room, he had scratched their initials into the label. "We'll open it on a special occasion." He had told her.

The kiss she placed on his lips and what had followed made the nightmare trip end on a very sweet note.

He grimaced at the bottle. They never had opened it. Truth be told, he had not thought about it again until a year and a half after they had broken up. That had been completely by accident when he had come down here for a bottle of wine to share with a date Addison had set up.

Thomas had mistakenly pulled it out, thinking it was a Pinot Grigio. When he saw the label and their initials, he had frozen in surprise. All the memories and regrets he had tried to push to the back of his mind had come rushing forward.

He immediately called a car for his date and sent her home. He then put the bottle in a place of honor in his wine cellar.

Thomas was shaken out of his musings when he heard footsteps.

"Hmm?" Amanda paused as she searched through a section of his cellar. Her back was to him.

"Rachel sent you down here too?" He asked.

She spun around in surprise. "She did." She walked into the smaller room he was in and smiled. "It seems like a life time ago that I was last in here."

He pulled out two wine glasses. "Why don't we sample a bottle before rejoining everyone?"

"I'd like that." She said softly.

He waved his hand around the cellar. "Anything in particular you are in the mood for?"

"It is Halloween." Her lips turned up in a teasing smile. "A bold red seems appropriate."

"There's also endless candy on this night." He countered. "Perhaps something sweet?" He eyed the bottle that he now wanted to share with her.

"After that punch Addison made me try, I think I have had enough sweetness to last a lifetime." She shuddered. "I don't even want to know how many cups of sugar went into that."

Thomas couldn't quite hide his disappointment and turned away to find her a bottle of red.

Amanda noticed and came along beside him. "Thomas?"

He glanced down at her. "Yes?"

She placed her hand on his arm. "What's wrong?"

He closed his eyes and tried to remind himself of his plans. He was to admit to nothing until he showed that they could be a family in Cordonia.

"Did I do something to upset you?" She asked.

He could hear the worry in her voice. "No. You--" he dropped his head forward for a moment and silently handed her the bottle.

She took it and let out a slight gasp. "This--this is the--" she swallowed and looked up at him. "You kept this all these years?"

"I did." He murmured. "We were to drink it together."

"On a special occasion." She added.

He watched as she ran her fingers over their initials. They trembled before she set it down on the table.

"Should we finally see which one of us was right?" Her eyes met his. "I'm still standing by my belief that it will be sweet."

His lips quirked. "You always were stubborn."

She laughed and handed him a corkscrew. "About time you noticed."

While they waited on the wine to breathe, they went through his collection to choose a few bottles to take up to the party.

"Time to see who's right." She said after glancing at her watch.

"You do realize that the odds are against you." He chuckled when she narrowed her eyes. "That trip offered nothing good, save the time we had together."

She shook her head. "I refuse to accept that without proof." She poured him a glass then one for herself.

Amanda held hers up in a toast. "Here's to being right."

His lips twisted in a wry grin. "Why thank you."

She snorted while taking a sip. Her eyes widened in surprise.

"That bad?" He teased.

"I refuse to offer a comment until you try it." She replied, keeping her face devoid of all expression.

He braced himself and took a tentative sip. The sweet wine landed pleasantly on his tongue.

Her lips curved in triumphant. "I'm waiting."

"You were right." He conceded. "Somehow, there was a hidden gem in this pitiful bottle.

They leaned against the table as they enjoyed the wine. After a few moments of companionable silence, Amanda spoke up.

"That bottle is a lot like us."

Thomas lifted an eyebrow. "In what way?"

She picked it up and smoothed the crooked label. "Our relationship might not have been the best when it ended, but Kathleen was the sweet surprise to come from it."

"Our relationship was one of the highlights of my life." He admitted.

She looked up at him in surprise. "We were happy, or at least I was." She grimaced. "Then the pregnancy hormones and my pride ruined things."

"My ego was also to blame." He added. "I thought I knew what was best for both of us." He rubbed the back of his neck. "When I think of all I could have done differently..." He trailed off and tried to keep his mind on the plan to truly pursue her once they were in Cordonia.

She took another swallow of the wine. "We have become much too serious for Halloween." She tried to smile. "We can't go back and change how circumstances unfolded no matter how much we wish."

He lifted his eyes to her face. She finished her glass and met his gaze. Her eyebrows drew together in question.

"Thomas, what--"

He set their glasses down and swiftly pulled her into his arms. His lips landed on hers, parted in surprise.

Amanda felt overwhelmed. She had not been kissed in over five years. Her breath hitched at the sensation of being in his embrace once more. Her hands slid up his chest, arms wrapping around his neck.

Thomas wrapped one arm around her waist while his other hand moved up her back. His lips moved over hers again and again. His knees nearly buckled with the passion in her response. Feeling her caress and touch once more was nearly his undoing.

He lifted her onto the table without breaking their kiss.

She broke away to catch her breath. It only increased when his lips touched her neck. She pulled him closer, enjoying the feel of his stubble brushing her sensitive skin.

Thomas cupped her face, pausing to look into her eyes. "I've wanted to do that for five years."

She slowly smiled before pressing her lips to his. He tilted his head back when she brushed kisses along his neck.

His mouth slammed into hers when he felt her fingers toying with the buttons to his shirt. His hands shook as they moved over her body.

"Thomas? Amanda?" Rachel called out from the stairwell "People are starting to leave."

The two broke apart. Amanda hopped off the table and smoothed her hair back. Thomas buttoned his shirt.

"We'll be right there." He called out.

Amanda chewed nervously on her bottom lip. "I--"

He cupped her face and kissed her once more.

She stood transfixed with how gentle and almost lovingly his lips captured hers.

He pressed his forehead to hers. "Once Kathleen is asleep, would you like to join me downstairs?" He lifted his head. "We could talk, perhaps watch a movie?"

"I would like that." Amanda said a touch hesitantly. "I've missed our talks and tomorrow will be a long flight with Kathleen."

"Our last chance to be alone for a while." He said softly, kissing her again.

She sighed when he released her. He took her hand and led her toward the stairs.

*************

"I am apologizing, Iowa." Seth winced when Jessica smacked the back of his head.

Thomas and Amanda paused when they noticed all the tearful children. Kathleen sniffed and ran over to them.

"What happened?" Thomas demanded.

"Seth thought he should tell a scary story to a room full of children under the age of six." Holly answered. Her glare made the culprit back up a few steps.

Ryan held their daughter who was crying in his arms.

Matt and Addison were trying to comfort their sons.

Chris cuddled his own daughter while snapping at Seth. "What the hell, man?! Who tries to scare children?" Shannon took the tearful child out of his arms and softly shushed her.

"It's Halloween!" Seth argued. "I thought it was appropriate." He groaned when a very pregnant Jessica waddled away toward the car. "I'm sorry kids. Uncle Seth was trying to be fun. There is no such thing as ghosts that come out from under the bed as soon as you close your eyes."

Kathleen buried her face against Amanda's shoulder when she picked her up.

Seth quickly escaped when every parent took a step toward him.

"I hope that when that baby is born that he pukes on Seth every time he opens that big mouth of his." Holly said, praying she had that power to curse him.

"I can think of worst things to happen to him." Thomas added.

"On that note," Matt lifted both boys in his arms, "we are going to take these kidos home and think nothing but happy thoughts." He smiled at the two. “Aren’t we?”

Michael and Marcus nodded, while trying to smile.

"We're going to miss you." Addison said on her way out. "Maybe we can come for a visit soon. You will be back for Thanksgiving, right?"

"You will always be welcome." Amanda hugged her. "I won't know about travel until I see how my duchy has survived while I was away."

"Then we will come to you." Holly hugged her. "Have a safe trip."

All the others filed out with wishes to see them soon.

"Stephen and I have already started the cleanup." Rachel gently patted Kathleen's back. "Ignore what that idiot said, Kat."

Kathleen giggled at the angry look on her aunt's face. She reached out and hugged her. "Goodnight, Aunt Rachel."

"Goodnight sweetheart." She sniffed and pressed a kiss to her forehead. "I'm going to miss seeing you each day."

"I'm going to miss you and Uncle Stephen lots." More tears fell from Kathleen's eyes.

"Then they will have to visit us." Amanda encouraged. "I don't think they have ever been to Cordonia before."

"We haven't." Rachel said a bit excitedly. "I won't know until I talk to Stephen, but we should be able to extend our leave for a little while longer. Since we have been working from home these last few weeks, everything has gone well."

Thomas took Kathleen when she reached for him. She rested her head on his shoulder and yawned. "We can discuss this in the morning." He placed his arm along Amanda's waist. "Let's get this one out of her costume."

Rachel wished them all a goodnight, told them not to worry about a thing, and went outside to finish everything up.

**************

Amanda loosened the braids Kathleen's hair was in.

"Did I really look like Dorothy?" She asked.

"Exactly like her." Thomas replied. “I had to do a doubletake each time you passed by.”

Kathleen leaned down and peeked at the darkness under her bed. "Nothing's under there?"

He knelt down once more and shined a flashlight. "Nothing at all. There are no such things as ghosts. Seth is an imbecile that shouldn't be let out into the general public.

Amanda coughed on her laughter. "Would you feel better if we left a light on?"

"Yes, please." Kathleen pleaded.

Thomas turned on her twinkle lights and a small desk lamp. "How's that?"

"Better." Kathleen took a running leap and landed in her bed. She quickly jerked her foot away from the edge and began to build a protective wall along her sides with her stuffed animals.

"Seth better thank his Maker that I am leaving the country." Thomas spat. "He--"

"Shh." Amanda grasped his hand. "Let's help her finish her walls of animals."

He bit his tongue and finished making sure Kathleen felt secure enough to try and sleep.

"We will be downstairs for a little while in case you need us." Amanda told her, kissing her cheek.

"Okay." Kathleen yawned.

"Sweet dreams." Thomas kissed her other cheek.

"You too." Kathleen smiled sleepily and cuddled a bear in her arms. "Goodnight."

*************

"I hope she doesn't have nightmares." Amanda sat down beside Thomas.

"I do too." He wrapped his arm around her and gently pulled her closer.

His lips brushed her temple.

"Thomas, shouldn't we--" she sighed into his kiss.

"Shouldn't we what?" He asked.

"Shouldn't we discuss this?" She could feel all her old worries clawing their way back.

"Of course." He sat up straight and took her hand in his. "I told you what I wanted in New York."

"You wanted to get to know the person I am now." She lifted an eyebrow in question. "Right?"

"Yes." He laced his fingers with hers. "I never stopped loving you."

She lowered her eyes. "You said that back in New York."

His dark eyes traced her profile. "I've fallen more deeply in love with you since then."

"You have?" Her eyes flew up to his face, searching for the truth.

"Yes." He moved closer to her. "My intentions are simple." He held her startled gaze as he spoke. "I want us to be together. Romantically."

"But--" she closed her eyes for a moment. "What if it doesn't work out again?"

"It will work out." He cupped her cheek. "I wouldn't risk our closeness or my time with Kathleen if I was not certain that all would be as it should." His thumb skimmed her lower lip. "I want to be with you."

"I--" her voice cracked.

"Amanda," he gently kissed her, "what do you want?"

Her hazel eyes lifted to his. After all this time, she still wanted him. Thomas had been the only man she had loved with her entire heart. Seeing him be the family man she had once imagined made her begin to hope again that he might want her too. "I want to be with you."

She surged up and kissed him, muffling his response. He repositioned the two of them on the couch, so they were lying beside each other.

"I know you will have a lot to do in Cordonia." He pressed a lingering kiss to her neck. "Yet, I want us to try and find a moment here and there for us to spend time together."

"We'll find the time." Her breath hitched as he rolled on top of her.

"Good." He whispered against her lips. "Because I have a number of plans, Lady Bridgerton."

She smiled. "You do?"

He nodded, letting his lips brush against hers. "I intend to--"

"Mommy?"

They jerked apart when they heard Kathleen call out from down the hall. She came in the theater room.

"I can’t sleep." She sniffled and walked over to them. “I’m scared I’ll see the ghost.”

Thomas and Amanda made room between them for her to sit.

"Sweethheart, you know you are safe here. Nothing is going to come out and scare you." she asked, cuddling her close. “Do you think you could try and close your eyes and rest?”

"No mam." Kathleen nestled her head under Amanda's chin. "Can I sleep in your bed tonight?"

"Of course." Amanda set her down and stood up.

"Will you stay with me?" Kathleen asked.

"I will." Amanda tried to get her to laugh. "But I am only allowing three animals with us. I can't wake up again with a penguin going up my nose."

Kathleen giggled. "I'll go get them." She paused at the doorway. "Daddy can you come with me and check under the bed again?"

"I will." He stood up and smoothed his hair back. Thomas muttered to Amanda as he passed. "I'm going to destroy Seth for causing this interruption."

Her lips trembled as she followed them upstairs.

****************

"There is nothing at all under the bed or in the closet." Thomas reported. He sat down beside Kathleen as she clutched her toys to her chest.

"Thank you." She eyed the edges of the bed. "Can you sleep with us too?"

He studied the cramped sleeping arrangement. "This bed is a little small for the three of us.

Kathleen’s voice trembled. "But the ghost doesn't bother grownups."

"Sweetheart there are no ghosts." Amanda sat down on her other side. "Do you think your father and I would put you anywhere that wasn't safe?"

"No mam." Kathleen buried her face in her toys.

Thomas picked her and her toys up. "We’ll go to my room." He asked Amanda to grab whatever else they needed.

The three settled in his king size bed with Kathleen and her toys between the pair.

"Can we have a light on?" Kathleen whispered.

Thomas got up and flipped the switch to the suite's bathroom light. He closed the door some so it wouldn’t be so bright. "How's that?"

"Better." Kathleen responded. She rested her head on Amanda's shoulder. "You're not scared to sleep on the edge?"

"Not at all." Her mother pressed a kiss to the top of her head. "My only fear is that stuffed lion's mane making me sneeze." She exaggerated an almost sneeze then scolded the lion for doing that to her.

Kathleen giggled and continued to tickle her mother with the lion.

Thomas grumbled that he thought they were supposed to be sleeping.

His ladies froze and Amanda whispered in Kathleen's ear.

Thomas cracked open his eyes when he felt movement on his left. "Whatever mischief you two are concocting, I suggest it ceases before it is too late."

Kathleen giggled again.

Thomas heard more whispering. "Amanda, you will be the one who I retaliate against."

Both his ladies laughed at his threat.

Thomas turned on his side away from them so that they couldn't see his smile.

He then felt the first poke to his ribs and jumped out of bed. Without a word, he went to Amanda's side and caught her as she tried to escape.

Kathleen giggled harder as he tickled her mother.

"Thomas! No!" Amanda cried out while laughing. "I can't--" she doubled over with her giggles. "Mercy!" She yelled out.

He chuckled and stilled his hands. Her smile turned tender as she looked up at him. Her fingers caressed his cheek as he began to get up.

Kathleen snuggled back under the covers once they were all back in bed.

The three fell asleep, each happy with where they were at this moment.

[rayonfrozenwings]

I was tagged by @rosecailoway, @photofeesh  @rowaelinsmut and @theyretheirthere thank you my lovely babes. I almost forgot. but I got there like 10hours later. >.< lol

last?

drink: Water phone call: mother in law text message: Husband song you listened to: you spin me right round baby right round - on a movie - the wedding singer... cant say who sings it.  time you cried: dont know

ever?

dated someone twice: Yes kissed someone and regretted it: Yes been cheated on: kinda lost someone special: Yes gotten drunk and thrown up: oh yes fave colors? Blue, pink, white, black

in the last year have you?

made new friends: Yes fallen out of love: No laughed until you cried: yes - i think, I blame voice chats.  found out someone was talking about you: no - but they prob are... lol that sounds vain, but i mean, it would be silly to think people arent if i talk about others? ya know? even in passing. like oh the funniest thing happened, x said bla bla. and then that is... i dunno if im meant to interpret this a different way - probably... *shrug* met someone who changed you: dont know. probably. cant think of anyone in particular tho. found out who your friends are: *shrug* found that out a while ago... kissed someone on your Facebook friends list: Yes

general

how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: all bar 3 I think. do you have any pets: a black labrador cross do you want to change your name: nah what did you do for your last birthday: i think i was taken out to brunch, but I cant remember... so long ago... lol 3 months was ages ago hahahaha. what time did you wake up today: woke-7 got out of bed -9 what were you doing last night at midnight: ;) - nah jk sleeping haha what is something you can’t wait for:  that freaken book. Koa what are you listening to right now: the wedding singer on in the background  have you ever talked to a person named tom: probably *shrug* something that gets on your nerves: slow walkers. hearing my name for the hundredth time in an hour.... *rolls eyes* most visited website: Tumblr, discord, gmail hair colour: dark brown with purple tones. long or short hair: its long atm. but dont have a preference what do you like about yourself: i like my brain/personality most days, my shoulders, my boobs, my height...  want any piercings: not at this stage  blood type: O+ nicknames: nope.  relationship status: Married with kids. lol zodiac sign: Gemini pronouns: She/her. fave tv show: I dunno.... um.... I’m enjoying Home and Away at the moment. >.< tattoos: 0 right or left handed: right ever had surgery: yup piercings: yup - just ears sports: i used to play netball and loved it so much, but my knees are fucked = no jumping and twisting, which means I cant really defend... so.... its not happening. vacation: ... my next one?..... maybe a trip to see my parents for christmas? I need to organise it tho or it wont happen. um... other than that. no plans. trainers: ? yes? i guess. what is this asking? I have asics because of my huge ass feet.  eating: nothing drinking: nothing... i’m about to watch: the wedding singer, when i finish this, ill pay attention more.... waiting for: bed, i’m sleepy, but enjoying time without kids.  want: So many things…  get married: tick.  career: if anyone has any ideas let me know... currently mum. hugs or kisses: both. why not both? lips or eyes: again. both. why not both? shorter or taller: taller than me. so when i get a hug from behind the arms are like coming around me in a cocoon. its so nice. older or younger: I am older? all areas. lol nice arms or stomach: Arms hookup or relationship: *shrugs* I dont have anything to judge it on - relationship is good, but never had a hookup so couldnt say which was better.  troublemaker or hesitant: “Depends on the scenario” - agree Kathleen me too, so using your words.

have you ever?

kissed a stranger: Yes drank hard liquor: Yes lost glasses: Nope turned someone down: Yep sex on the first date: No broken someone’s heart: Yes had your heart broken: No been arrested: No cried when someone died: Yes fallen for a friend: Yes

do you believe in

yourself: sometimes depends on the scenario  miracles: sometimes love at first sight: sometimes kiss on the first date: sometimes angels: sometimes lol whoops. guess I should say I flip flop sometimes. 

other?

best friend’s name: Hubby  eye colour: Dark olive green that almost looks brown. fave movie: eh. ive enjoyed thor ragnarok and the wedding singer? lol i cant pick. favourite actor: dont really have one...  favourite food: anything that doesnt kill me - currently its potato chips plain salt flavour.  extrovert or introvert: “It depends who I’m with…”- again im using kathleen’s words favourite flower: Roses. White if I can. favourite hello kitty character? I don’t know any

tagging anyone that wants to do this! and @emcrie @urbisie @verifiefangirl @nephelle-warrior-scribe @beka2305 @bookofmirth @feyrearch @terrasn @morrigan-the-dreamer @slytherclaw713 @lady-katkat

[newsblog]

July 22, 2020 Seacoast NH Local

from seacoastonline:

July 30 was announced as the opening date for an outdoor popup food, beverage and entertainment venue, while remaining challenges were described Wednesday as including a need for detailed plans and liability insurance, as well as a shortage of portable toilets.  The popup venue is planned for the Bridge Street parking lot, and a planning committee announced Wednesday it’s close to hiring a general manager. The event is planned to help struggling downtown businesses during the coronavirus pandemic and to include a beer garden, rotating food and retail vendors and a performance area.  A sketch shown Wednesday shows a performance stage at the lower end of the parking lot, surrounded by an 8-foot chain link fence, in front of 106 seats at tables. The upper end of the lot is planned for three sheds for restaurant vendors, with 100 seats at tables taking that half of the lot.  Retail sheds are planned for Bridge Street and plans show the lot divided by a “corral” with five portable toilets.  The city has committed $50,000 toward the project with organizers fundraising the rest. Tickets to enter the food and beer sections will be $1 and performance tickets will be largely sold in advance online, it was announced.  City facilities manager Joe Almeida reported Wednesday he’s contacted multiple portable toilet vendors, learned there’s currently a shortage and he has yet to reserve any for the venue. He said he left inquiries with other vendors Wednesday.  City health agent Kim McNamara said before she approves the plans, she needs more details, in particular about how people are going to flow through the venue, and where they’ll be removing face masks to eat and drink.  McNamara said the thought of more than 100 people on the parking lot not wearing masks is “pretty terrifying” and there are concerns about unmasked people congregating.  Kathleen Cavalaro, director of Seacoast Repertory Theatre and Pop Up Portsmouth organizer, said the hope is people attending performances can bring food and drinks to their tables. She said volunteers will be on hand to keep the space at allowed capacity and help people move to where they want to go.

University of New Hampshire students returning to campus this fall will be tested for COVID-19 before they arrive, when they arrive and “repeatedly through the semester,” according to school President Jim Dean.  UNH will also be testing faculty and staff before they return to campus, Dean said during a Zoom video conference question-and-answer session with town officials Wednesday.

The City Council voted to authorize acceptance of a housing covenant, providing 27 units of workforce housing in the 270-unit West End Yards development, while some councilors expressed regret there are not more workforce units in the plan.  The development is underway at the site of the former Frank Jones Center off the Route 1 Bypass. City Manager Karen Conard reported Wednesday the covenant calls for the 27 workforce units to be affordable to 80 percent of people earning the local median income of $60,000. She said a one-bedroom workforce apartment for that demographic will rent for $1,348 a month.  City Councilor Esther Kennedy said that rent remains unaffordable for people making $12 and $15 an hour.  “We talk about workforce housing as affordable housing, and it’s not,” she said.  Councilor Deaglan McEachern said he agreed and the city could have asked for 20% of the housing units to be designated as workforce under state statute, but did not, “and that’s disappointing in this case.”  City Planning Director Juliet Walker said the percentage of workforce housing was negotiated in exchange for density bonuses for the developer and other benefits to the city. She said those include the developer constructing a connector road to Cate Street and significant improvements to the Hodgson Brook watershed.  It was also reported the negotiations include the covenant ensuring the workforce housing units remain so for 30 years, as opposed to the 20 years required by state law.  Attorney John Bosen, representing the developers, said if the council did not authorize Conard to accept the covenant, “it would be catastrophic.”  Bosen said the project is approved, constructed has started and a “very significant construction loan was obtained.” He reminded a land swap was approved with the city for the Cate Street connector road and said the developer’s bank loan requires building the 27 units of workforce housing.  “If this doesn’t pass, I hate to say it, but it would result in litigation, because the borrower would be out of covenant with its lender,” Bosen told the council. “I think it would be a disaster all around for a lot of people.”  Bosen also noted that when built, the development will “be the largest workforce development in the city, to date.”

PORTLAND, Maine (AP) — A public commission examining whether Maine needs to add a new area code has determined it likely does, though it is asking telecommunications companies for more information.  Last week, Maine’s Public Utilities Commission opened an investigation into the number of unused phone numbers in the 207 area code, and asked providers to detail the number of blocks they hold with less than 100 phone numbers in use.  In April, the commission opened an inquiry into extending Maine’s beloved area code, 207. It determined the code is “exhausted,” meaning there are not enough available numbers to meet expected demand, the Portland Press Herald reported.  But the inquiry also found that only 37% of 207 numbers are currently in use. The reason has to do with the way phone numbers are divided between service providers and geographies.  Providers like AT&T, or local telecommunications provider GWI, distribute numbers from a block of 1,000 that all start with the same three numbers following the area code. If the provider has assigned more than 100 numbers in that block, it is considered “contaminated,” and reserved exclusively for that provider’s use in that location.  The commission’s inquiry explains that method of distribution and reserving of number blocks is one reason there are not enough 207 numbers to go around. Increased use of wireless devices is another.  The commission also studied other ways to extend the life of 207 as an area code, but concluded: “The path of least resistance is, of course, to accept that a new area code in Maine is imminent and to take the necessary steps to smoothly implement the new area code.”

[hvilleicehockey-blog]

Watering the Wall of Indifference

Does It Matter What You Call It?: Genocide or Erasure of Palestinians By KATHLEEN and BILL CHRISTISON November 27, 2006

PLEASE READ

During an appearance in late October on Ireland’s Pat Kenny radio show, a popular national program broadcast daily on Ireland’s RTE Radio, we were asked as the opening question if Israel could be compared to Nazi Germany. Not across the board, we said, but there are certainly some aspects of Israel’s policy toward the Palestinians that bear a clear resemblance to the Nazis’ oppression. Do you mean the wall, Kenny prompted, and we agreed, describing the ghettoization and other effects of this monstrosity. Before we could elaborate on other Nazi-like features of Israel’s policies, Kenny moved on to another question. Within minutes, while we were still on the air, a producer handed Kenny a note, which we later learned was a request from the newly arrived Israeli ambassador to Ireland to appear on the show, by himself. Several days later, on the air by himself, the ambassador pronounced us and our comparisons of Israeli and Nazi policies "outrageous."

What else? We were not surprised or disturbed by his outrage. We had just spent two weeks in the West Bank witnessing the oppression, and it was a sure bet that, even had he not been fulfilling his role as propagandist for Israel, the ambassador would not have known the first thing about the Palestinian situation in the West Bank because he had most likely not set foot there in any recent year. In retrospect, we regret not having used even stronger language. Having at that point just completed our fifth trip to Palestine since early 2003, we should have had the courage and the insight to call what we have observed Israel doing to the Palestinians by its rightful name: genocide.

We have long played with words about this, labeling Israel’s policy "ethnocide," meaning the attempt to destroy the Palestinians as a people with a specific ethnic identity. Others who dance around the subject use terms like "politicide" or, a new invention, "sociocide," but neither of these terms implies the large-scale destruction of people and identity that is truly the Israeli objective. "Genocide" — defined by the UN Convention as the intention "to destroy, in whole or in part, a national, ethnical, racial, or religious group" — most aptly describes Israel’s efforts, akin to the Nazis’, to erase an entire people. (See William Cook’s The Rape of Palestine for a discussion of what constitutes genocide.)

In fact, it matters little what you call it, so long as it is recognized that what Israel intends and is working toward is the erasure of the Palestinian people from the Palestine landscape. Israel most likely does not care about how systematic its efforts at erasure are, or how rapidly they proceed, and in these ways it differs from the Nazis. There are no gas chambers; there is no overriding urgency. Gas chambers are not needed. A round of rockets on a residential housing complex in the middle of the night here, a few million cluster bomblets or phosphorous weapons there can, given time, easily meet the UN definition above.

Children shot to death sitting in school classrooms here, families murdered while tilling their land there; agricultural land stripped and burned here, farmers cut off from their land there; little girls riddled with bullets here, infants beheaded by shell fire there; a little massacre here, a little starvation there; expulsion here, denial of entry and families torn apart there; dispossession is the name of the game. With no functioning economy, dwindling food supplies, medical supply shortages, no way to move from one area to another, no access to a capital city, no easy access to education or medical care, no civil service salaries, the people will die, the nation will die without a single gas chamber. Or so the Israelis hope.

Surrender vs. Resistance

A major part of the Israeli scheme — apart from the outright land expropriation, national fragmentation, and killing that are designed to strangle and destroy the Palestinian people — is to so discourage the Palestinians psychologically that they will simply leave voluntarily — if they have the money — or give up in abject surrender and agree to live quietly in small enclaves under the Israeli thumb. You wonder sometimes if the Israelis are not succeeding in this bit of psychological warfare, as they are succeeding in tightening their physical stranglehold on territory in the West Bank and Gaza. Overall, we do not believe they have yet brought the Palestinians to this point of psychological surrender, although the breaking point for Palestinians appears nearer than ever before.

The anger and depression, even despair, in Palestine are palpable these days, far worse than we have previously encountered. We met two Palestinians so discouraged that they are preparing to leave, in one case uprooting family from a Muslim village where roots go back centuries. The other case is a Christian young person, also from an old family, who sees no prospects for herself or anyone and who feels betrayed by her Catholic Church for having abandoned Palestine’s Christians. She would rather just be elsewhere. A Palestinian pollster who has tracked attitudes toward emigration recently reported that the proportion of people thinking about leaving has jumped from about 20 percent, where it has long hovered, to 32 percent in a recent poll, largely because of despair arising from intra-Palestinian factional fighting and from Hamas’ inability to govern thanks to crippling Israeli, U.S., and European sanctions.

Nothing like one-third of Palestinians will ultimately leave or even attempt to leave, but the trend in attitudes clearly points to the kind of despair that is afflicting much of Palestine. One thoughtful Palestinian writer with whom we spent an evening feels so defeated and so oppressed by Israeli restrictions that he thinks Hamas should abandon its principled stand and agree to recognize Israel’s right to exist, in the hope that this concession might induce the Israelis to lift some of the innumerable restrictions on Palestinian life, end the military siege on Palestinian territories and the land theft, and in general ease the day-to-day misery that Palestinians endure under occupation. Asked if he thought such a major Hamas concession would actually bring meaningful Israeli concessions, he said no, but perhaps it would ease the misery a little. It was clear he holds out no great hope. His village’s land is gradually disappearing underneath the separation wall and expanding Israeli settlements.

We met westerners who have lived in the West Bank, working on behalf of the Palestinians for various NGOs for a decade and more, who are planning to leave out of frustration at seeing the situation worsen year after year and their own work increasingly go for naught. Many other western human rights workers and educators, particularly at venerable institutions like the Friends’ School in Ramallah and Bir Zeit University, are being denied visas by the Israelis as part of their deliberate campaign to keep out foreign passport holders, including thousands of ethnic Palestinians who have lived in the West Bank with their families and worked for years. The Israeli campaign to deny residency and re-entry permits is a deliberate attempt at ethnic cleansing, a hope that if a husband or wife is barred, he or she will remove the rest of the family and Israel will have fewer Palestinians to deal with. In addition, the entry denial campaign targets in particular anyone, Palestinian or international, who might bring a measure of business prosperity to the Palestinian territories, or education, or medical assistance, or humanitarian assistance.

The campaign against foreigners who might help the Palestinians or bear witness for them became particularly vicious in mid-November when a 19-year-old Swedish volunteer with the International Solidarity Movement escorting Palestinian children to school was brutally attacked by Israeli settlers in Hebron as Israeli soldiers watched. The young woman, Tove Johansson, was walking through an Israeli army checkpoint with several other volunteers when they were set upon by a group of approximately 100 settlers chanting, "We killed Jesus, we’ll kill you too!" A settler hit Johansson in the face with a broken bottle, breaking her cheekbone, and as she lay bleeding on the ground, the settlers cheered and clapped and took pictures of themselves posing next to her. The Israeli soldiers briefly questioned three settlers but made no arrests and conducted no investigation. In fact, they threatened the international volunteers with arrest if they did not leave the area immediately. The assault was so raw and brutal that Amnesty International issued an alert warning internationals to beware of settler attacks. The U.S. media have not seen fit to report the incident, which was clearly part of a longstanding effort to discourage witnesses to Israeli atrocities and deprive Palestinians of any protection against the atrocities.

Palestinian resistance does figure in this dismal story. In the same small village where one of our acquaintances is uprooting his family, others are building, building small homes and multi-story apartment buildings, simply as a sign of resistance. International human rights volunteers are still trying to reach the West Bank and Gaza to assist Palestinians. When we told one Palestinian friend about our conversation with the writer who wants Hamas to concede Israel’s right to exist, his immediate reaction was "absolutely not." He is himself a secular Muslim, a Fatah supporter, does not like Hamas and did not vote for Hamas in last January’s legislative elections, but he fully supports Hamas’s refusal to recognize Israel’s right to exist until Israel recognizes the right of the Palestinian people to exist as a nation. "Why should I recognize you until you get out of my garden?" he wondered.

Our friend Ahmad’s views reflect the general feeling among Palestinians: a poll conducted in September by a Palestinian polling organization found that 67 percent of Palestinians do not think Hamas should recognize Israel in order to satisfy Israeli and international demands, while almost the same proportion, 63 percent, would support recognizing Israel if this came as part of a peace agreement in which a Palestinian state was established — in other words, if Israel also recognized the Palestinians as a nation. Surrender is not yet on the horizon.

On the possibility of pulling up stakes and leaving Palestine, Ahmad was equally adamant. "Why should I leave and then have to fight to get back later? Empires never last." He mentioned the Turks and the British and the Soviets, "and the Americans and the Israelis won’t last either. It may take a long time, but we can wait." He was angrier than we have ever previously seen him, and more uncompromising — and with good reason: the separation wall is now within a few yards of his home and demolition is threatened. Ahmad and some neighbors have been fighting the wall’s advance in court and succeeded in stopping it for over a year, but construction is moving ahead again. He already has to drive miles out of his way to skirt the wall on his way to work and will be able to exit only on foot when the wall is completed — assuming his house is not demolished altogether.

But he is not giving up. He thinks suicide bombers are "a piece of shit," but he believes the Palestinians have to resist in some way, if only by throwing stones, and he sees some kind of explosion in the offing. If Palestinians do nothing at all, he said, "the Israelis will just relax" and will feel no pressure to cease the oppression. Palestinians everywhere are keeping up the pressure. Haaretz correspondent Gideon Levy described a cloth banner displayed in Beit Hanoun immediately after Israel’s devastation of that small Gaza city during the first week in November. "Kill, destroy, crush — you won’t succeed in breaking us," declared the banner.

Palestinians in Beit Hanoun, as well as throughout Gaza and the West Bank, have been putting up resistance to their own incompetent, quisling leadership, as well as to Israel. It has not escaped the notice of the Palestinian man in the street that, while Israel slaughters men, women, and children in Beit Hanoun and continues its march across the West Bank, Palestinian Authority President Mamhud Abbas has been cooperating with the U.S. and Israel to undermine the democratically elected Hamas government. The U.S. is arming and training a militia that will protect Abbas’ and Fatah’s narrow factional interests against Hamas’ fighters, in what can only be termed an open coup attempt against the legally constituted Palestinian government.

Few Palestinians, even Fatah supporters, condone this U.S. interference or Abbas’ traitorous acquiescence. "Fatah are thieves," a local leader who is a Fatah member himself told us. "Hamas won because we wanted to get rid of the thieves." He thinks that if there were an election today, "ordinary people" — by which he means people not associated with either Fatah or Hamas — would win. In each house, he said, "we find one son with Hamas, another son with Fatah, so how is a father going to support one or the other?" It is perhaps this knowledge that they cannot fight each other without destroying the nuclear and the broader Palestinian family, and that they must not succumb to Israeli and U.S. schemes to fragment Palestinian society, that have motivated the intensive Palestinian efforts to achieve some kind of unity government.

Around the West Bank

In Bil’in, the small town west of Ramallah that has seen a non-violent protest against the wall by Palestinians, Israelis, and internationals every Friday for almost two years, the village leader, Ahmad Issa Yassin, talked about the lesson his youngest son learned after being arrested last year at age 14 in an Israeli raid. "He is more courageous now, more ready to resist," Yassin said. "So am I." We first met this boy a few months before his arrest, a particularly friendly young man with a sweet smile. He greeted us again this year with another warm smile and bantered with us as we took his picture. He gave no hint of having spent two months in one of Israel’s worst prisons or of the horror of having been arrested in a Nazi-style middle-of-the-night raid. Perhaps he threw stones at the Israeli soldiers who converge on his village at least once a week and respond to non-violent protests with live ammunition, rubber bullets, teargas, concussion grenades, and batons. This boy was no terrorist. On the other hand, the Israelis may have turned him into a young man willing to fight terror with terror a few years from now.

Yassin walked us to his olive grove, half destroyed, on the other side of the wall. The Israelis allow the villagers access to lands that now lie on Israel’s side of the wall, but there is only one gate, manned by Israeli soldiers who may or may not bestir themselves to open it. The villagers’ names are all on a list of Palestinians authorized to pass through the gate. At this particular village, one of many whose lands have been cut off from the village, protesters have established an outpost or, as they call it, a "settlement" on the Israeli side to stake a claim to the land for the village even though it now lies on Israel’s side in the path of an expanding Israeli settlement. The Palestinian "settlement" consists of a small building, a tent where a couple of activists maintain a constant vigil, and a soccer field for a bit of normality.

Yassin took us uphill on a dirt path running alongside the wall, which in this rural area consists of an electronic fence, a dirt patrol road on each side where footprints can be picked up, a paved patrol road on the Israeli side, and coils of razor wire on each side — encompassing altogether an area about 50 meters wide, where olive groves once stood. We waited at the gate in the electronic fence while Yassin called several times to the Israeli soldiers, whom we could see lounging under a tent canopy on a nearby hillside. When they finally came to the gate, they checked Yassin’s name against their list of permitees, recorded our names and passport numbers, and officiously warned us against taking pictures in this "military zone." As we made our way across country to the Bil’in outpost, Yassin pointed out olive trees burned and uprooted by Israelis and, at the outpost right next to the stump of a tree that had been cut down, a new tree sprouting from the old one.

We talked for a while with a Palestinian activist from the village and a young British activist who had both been sleeping late into the morning, after enjoying a Ramadan meal, the Iftar, late the night before. When we returned to the gate, the Israeli soldiers were even slower arriving to open it, obviously totally bored with their duty. The following Friday at the weekly protest, they enjoyed a little more excitement as protesters managed to erect ladders to scale the fence. The soldiers responded with batons and teargas.

The resistance goes on, but so does the Israeli encroachment. We took away with us two striking impressions: the little olive tree being carefully nurtured as a sign of renewal and resistance, and in the near distance the constant sound of bulldozers and earth-clearing equipment working on the Israeli settlement of Modiin Illit, being built on the lands of Bil’in and other neighboring villages.

Elsewhere, signs of the Israeli advance override the continuing signs of Palestinian resistance. In the small village of Wadi Fuqin southwest of Bethlehem, a beautiful village sitting in a narrow, fertile valley between ridge lines that is being squeezed on one side by the wall, still to be constructed, and on the other by the already large and rapidly expanding Israeli settlement of Betar Illit, we saw more destruction. The settlement is dumping vast tonnages of construction debris down onto the village, so that its fields are gradually being swallowed. This was more evident this year than when we visited last year. The settlement’s sewage often overflows onto village land through sewage pipes evident high up on the hillside. Israeli settlers swagger through the village increasingly, as if it were theirs, swimming in the many irrigation pools that are fed by natural springs dating back to Roman times.

In the village of Walaja, not far away to the north, nearer Jerusalem, Ahmad took us to visit friends of his. The village is scheduled to be surrounded completely by the wall because it sits near the Green Line in the midst of a cluster of Israeli settlements. We sat in a garden of fruit trees with a family whose house is on a hill overlooking a spectacular valley and hills beyond. Jerusalem sits on another hill in the distance. We commented that, except for the Israeli settlements across the valley, the place is like paradise, but our host responded with a cynical laugh that actually it is hell. Even beautiful scenery loses its appeal when one is trapped and surrounded.

In another encircled village that we visited last year, Nu’man, the approximately 200 residents are also trapped between the wall, now completed, on one side and the advancing settlement of Har Homa, which covets the village land, on the other. Although last year, with the wall incomplete, we could drive in, this year we were denied entry at the one gate in. With Ahmad, we tried to talk to four obviously intimidated young Palestinian men waiting across the patrol road from the gate to gain entry to their homes, but the Israeli soldiers told them not to talk to us; one of them said a few words to Ahmad but never took his eyes off the Israeli guardpost. We drove off and left them to their plight. We could have tried to get to the village with an arduous cross-country walk, but we did not.

"Grand" Terminals

With the near completion of the separation wall, the Israelis have systematized the West Bank prison. Since August 2005, the number of checkpoints throughout the West Bank has risen 40 percent, from 376 to 528, according to OCHA, the UN Office for the Coordination of Humanitarian Affairs, which carefully tracks the numbers and types of Israeli checkpoints, as well as other aspects of the Israeli stranglehold on the Palestinians. As part of the systematization, a series of elaborate terminals now manage the humiliation of Palestinians at major checkpoints, particularly around Jerusalem. The terminals are huge cages resembling cattle runs, which direct foot traffic in snaking lines that double back and forth. At the end of the line are a series of turnstiles, x-ray machines, conveyor belts, and other accoutrements of heavy security. Any Palestinian entering Jerusalem from the West Bank to work, to visit family, to pray at al-Aqsa Mosque or the Church of the Holy Sepulchre, to go to school, or for medical treatment must have a hard-to-obtain permit from Israel. The turnstiles and other security barriers are controlled remotely by Israeli soldiers housed behind heavy bullet-proof glass.

The cages are currently painted a bright, cheerful blue, but it’s a fair bet that when they are older and worn, the paint job will not be renewed. Adding to the false cheer, the Israelis have erected incongruous welcoming signs at the terminals. Most egregious is the giant sign at the Bethlehem terminal. "Peace be with you," it proclaims in three languages to travelers leaving Jerusalem for Bethlehem. This is on a giant pastel-colored sign erected by the Israeli Ministry of Tourism, as if travel through this terminal were the ordinary tourist lark. At the Qalandiya terminal between Ramallah and Jerusalem, a large cartoon-like red rose welcomes Palestinians with a sign in Arabic. Early this year when the terminal was opened, the rose was on a sign that proclaimed, in three languages, "The hope of us all." Apparently embarrassed at being caught so red-handed in their hypocrisy, the Israelis removed the sign, preserving only the rose, after a Jewish activist stenciled over it the words that once graced the entrance to Auschwitz, "Arbeit Macht Frei" — work makes you free. There is still a sign saying in three languages, "May you go in peace and return in peace." The Israelis still don’t really get it.

Nor do the Americans. The terminals, advertised as a way to "ease life" for Palestinians by prettying up the checkpoints of old and making passage more efficient, were paid for out of U.S. aid monies designated originally for the Palestinian Authority (before the Hamas election) but diverted to Israel’s terminal-building enterprise — helping Israel make Palestinian humiliation more efficient. Steven Erlanger in the New York Times, among others, fell for the scam, noting when the Bethlehem terminal opened in December last year that the terminals were aimed at "easing the burden on Palestinians and softening international criticism." He labeled the Bethlehem terminal a "grand" gateway for Christians visiting Jesus’ birthplace — not acknowledging that Christians had been visiting for two millennia without benefit of turnstiles and concrete walls.

The burden on Palestinians has not been significantly eased as far as we could tell. We spent some time watching at several of the terminals — feeling like voyeurs of Palestinian misery. At Qalandiya, about 100 people stood waiting to pass through three locked turnstiles. A young Israeli woman soldier sat in a glassed-in control booth barking commands at them. Our friend Ahmad speaks Hebrew as well as Arabic and could not even make out which language she was speaking in. There was no reason for her anger or for her decision to lock the turnstiles. When she saw us observing, carrying a camera, she shook her finger in an apparent warning against taking pictures. They don’t like witnesses. Immediately after this, she unlocked the turnstiles.

We walked through after everyone else who had been waiting, and Ahmad took us to the waiting area on the other side where Palestinians from the West Bank apply for permits to enter Jerusalem. About 50 people were waiting. A middle-aged man walked up to us and began telling his story. He was scheduled for neurosurgery at Maqassad Hospital in East Jerusalem in two days, according to a certificate from the hospital, written in English and clearly intended for Israeli permit authorities. He had already been waiting for six days — three futilely sitting in this waiting area and a previous three when the Israelis had closed the terminal altogether for Yom Kippur. He was beginning to fear he would never get his permit and, as he expressed his frustration and desperation, he began to cry. He asked that we take his picture holding the certificate and tell the world. We did, but we will never know if he obtained his permit in time, or at all.

At another terminal, leading from al-Azzariyah, the biblical Bethany, into Jerusalem, a soldier screamed at us — quite literally, his face red, blood vessels standing out on his neck — when he saw us taking pictures of his soldier colleagues questioning Palestinians before they entered the terminal area, a pre-screening for the screening at the terminal. We told the soldier we thought pictures would be all right; this terminal was run after all by the Ministry of Tourism and so must be a tourist attraction. But our flippancy didn’t go over well. He pushed us toward an exit gate, screaming that this was the "Ministry of Gates" and that we had to get out. We managed to remain inside until Ahmad, who was talking to another Israeli soldier, finished and exited with us. Maybe we saved one or two Palestinians from scrutiny by distracting a couple of soldiers — or maybe unfortunately we just delayed them further.

At a third checkpoint, this a makeshift one set up temporarily at an opening in the wall where the concrete barrier is still incomplete, we watched as a growing crowd of Palestinians wanting to enter Jerusalem to pray at al-Aqsa Mosque tried to negotiate with two young Israeli soldiers. It was a Friday in Ramadan and, although these Palestinians had permits to enter Jerusalem, their names were not on the authorized list at this particular checkpoint. They had to go, according to Israel’s administrative fiat, to the main terminal from their area into the city. As the crowd gathered, more Israeli soldiers arrived. The crowd included women as well as men, and several children. Being watched by a couple of Americans who probably appeared more patronizing than helpful clearly did not improve the mood of most of the crowd.

One little boy of about five, dressed neatly in a tie and pressed white shirt, stood looking at the commotion for a few minutes, standing slightly apart from his father, and suddenly burst into tears. A few minutes later, the soldiers exploded a concussion grenade, and most of the crowd dispersed. It’s the Israeli way: make them cry, run them off in fear. We left, embarrassed by our own inadequacy.

Terminology

Is it genocide when a little boy is made to cry because belligerent armed men intimidate him, intimidate his father, and ultimately run them off; when they are forbidden from performing their religious ceremonies because a belligerent government decides they are of the wrong religion; when their town is encircled and cut off because a racist state decides their ethnic identity is of the wrong variety?

You can argue over terminology, but the truth is evident everywhere on the ground where Israel has extended its writ: Palestinians are unworthy, inferior to Jews, and in the name of the Jewish people, Israel has given itself the right to erase the Palestinian presence in Palestine — in other words, to commit genocide by destroying "in whole or in part, a national, ethnical, racial, or religious group."

As we debate about and analyze the Palestinian psyche, trying to determine if they have had enough and will surrender or will survive by resisting, it is important to remember that the Jewish people, despite unspeakable tragedy, emerged from the holocaust ultimately triumphant. Israel and its supporters should keep this in mind: empires never last, as Ahmad said, and gross injustice such as the Nazis and Israel have inflicted on innocent people cannot prevail for long.

Kathleen Christison is a former CIA political analyst and has worked on Middle East issues for 30 years. She is the author of Perceptions of Palestine and The Wound of Dispossession.

Bill Christison was a senior official of the CIA. He served as a National Intelligence Officer and as Director of the CIA’s Office of Regional and Political Analysis. They spent October 2006 in Palestine and on a speaking tour of Ireland sponsored by the Ireland Palestine Solidarity Campaign

ORIGINAL PHOTO: Mohamed Abed, Beit Lahiya, Occupied Gaza Strip, November 23, 2006 (image shows the sister of Mohamed al-Jarjawi, age 20, killed by Israelis, weeping outside his hospital room). IMAGE ALTERATION: /anomalous

Posted by AnomalousNYC on 2006-11-27 17:04:27

Tagged: , Gaza Strip , Palestine , Occupied Palestine , Zionism is racism , Palestinian , mourning , Stop funding Israeli war crimes , ABigFave , forsaken , eli eli lama sabacthani , wordmingle adamant , free palestine , israel out of palestine , boycott israel , reject US-israeli terror , ethnic cleansing is still a crime , US aid to israel pays for genocide , hijab , Gaza , west Bank , Israel , anomalous , anomalousnyc

The post Watering the Wall of Indifference appeared first on Good Info.

[blackkudos]

Nina Simone

Nina Simone (/ˈniːnə sᵻˈmoʊn/; born Eunice Kathleen Waymon; February 21, 1933 – April 21, 2003) was an American singer, songwriter, pianist, arranger, and civil rights activist who worked in a broad range of musical styles including classical, jazz, blues, folk, R&B, gospel, and pop.

Born in North Carolina, the sixth child of a preacher, Simone aspired to be a concert pianist. With the help of the few supporters in her hometown of Tryon, North Carolina, she enrolled in the Juilliard School of Music in New York.

Waymon then applied for a scholarship to study at the prestigious Curtis Institute of Music in Philadelphia, where she was denied despite a well-received audition. Simone became fully convinced this rejection had been entirely due to her race, a statement that has been a matter of controversy. Years later, two days before her death, the Curtis Institute of Music bestowed an honorary degree on Simone.

To make a living, Eunice Waymon changed her name to "Nina Simone". The change related to her need to disguise herself from family members, having chosen to play "the devil's music" or "cocktail piano" at a nightclub in Atlantic City. She was told in the nightclub that she would have to sing to her own accompaniment, and this effectively launched her career as a jazz vocalist.

Simone recorded more than forty albums, mostly between 1958, when she made her debut with Little Girl Blue, and 1974, and had a hit in the United States in 1958 with "I Loves You, Porgy".

Simone's musical style fused gospel and pop with classical music, in particular Johann Sebastian Bach, and accompanied expressive, jazz-like singing in her contralto voice.

Biography

Youth (1933–1954)

Simone was born Eunice Kathleen Waymon in North Carolina and raised in Tryon, North Carolina. The sixth of eight children in a poor family, she began playing piano at age three; the first song she learned was "God Be With You, Till We Meet Again". Demonstrating a talent with the instrument, she performed at her local church. But her concert debut, a classical recital, was given when she was 12. Simone later said that during this performance, her parents, who had taken seats in the front row, were forced to move to the back of the hall to make way for white people. She said that she refused to play until her parents were moved back to the front, and that the incident contributed to her later involvement in the civil rights movement.

Simone's mother, Mary Kate Waymon (1902 - April 30, 2001), was a Methodist minister and a housemaid. Simone's father, John Divine Waymon (1898 - October 24, 1972), was a handyman who at one time owned a dry cleaning business, but also suffered bouts of ill health. Simone's music teacher helped establish a special fund to pay for her education. Subsequently, a local fund was set up to assist her continued education. With the help of this scholarship money she was able to attend Allen High School for Girls in Asheville, North Carolina.

After her graduation, Simone spent the summer of 1950 at the Juilliard School, preparing for an audition at the Curtis Institute of Music in Philadelphia. Her application, however, was denied. As her family had relocated to Philadelphia in the expectation of her entry to Curtis, the blow to her aspirations was particularly heavy, and she suspected that her application had been denied because of racial prejudice. Discouraged, she took private piano lessons with Vladimir Sokoloff, a professor at Curtis, but never re-applied to the institution. For several years, she worked a number of menial jobs and taught piano in Philadelphia.

Early success (1954–1959)

To fund her private lessons, Simone performed at the Midtown Bar & Grill on Pacific Avenue in Atlantic City, whose owner insisted that she sing as well as play the piano, which increased her income to $90 a week. In 1954, she adopted the stage name "Nina Simone". "Nina" (from niña, meaning "little girl" in Spanish), and "Simone" was taken from the French actress Simone Signoret, whom she had seen in the movie Casque d'Or. Knowing her mother would not approve of playing the "Devil's Music", she used her new stage name to remain undetected. Simone's mixture of jazz, blues, and classical music in her performances at the bar earned her a small but loyal fan base.

In 1958, she befriended and married Don Ross, a beatnik who worked as a fairground barker, but quickly regretted their marriage. Playing in small clubs in the same year, she recorded George Gershwin's "I Loves You, Porgy" (from Porgy and Bess), which she learned from a Billie Holiday album and performed as a favor to a friend. It became her only Billboard top 20 success in the United States, and her debut album Little Girl Blue soon followed on Bethlehem Records. Simone lost more than $1 million in royalties (notably for the 1980s re-release of My Baby Just Cares for Me) and never benefited financially from the album's sales because she had sold her rights outright for $3,000.

Becoming popular (1959–1964)

After the success of Little Girl Blue, Simone signed a contract with Colpix Records and recorded a multitude of studio and live albums. Colpix relinquished all creative control to her, including the choice of material that would be recorded, in exchange for her signing the contract with them. After the release of her live album Nina Simone at Town Hall, Simone became a favorite performer in Greenwich Village. By this time, Simone performed pop music only to make money to continue her classical music studies and was indifferent about having a recording contract. She kept this attitude toward the record industry for most of her career.

Simone married a New York police detective, Andrew Stroud, in 1961. He later became her manager and the father of her daughter Lisa, but he abused Simone psychologically and physically.

Civil rights era (1964–1974)

In 1964, Simone changed record distributors from the American Colpix to the Dutch Philips, which also meant a change in the contents of her recordings. She had always included songs in her repertoire that drew upon her African-American origins (such as "Brown Baby" by Oscar Brown and "Zungo" by Michael Olatunji in her album Nina at the Village Gate in 1962). On her debut album for Philips, Nina Simone in Concert (live recording, 1964), for the first time she openly addressed the racial inequality that was prevalent in the United States with the song "Mississippi Goddam", her response to the June 12, 1963, murder of Medgar Evers and the September 15, 1963, bombing of the 16th Street Baptist Church in Birmingham, Alabama, that killed four young black girls and partially blinded a fifth girl who survived. She remarked that the title and the song itself was, "like throwing 10 bullets back at them", becoming one of many other protest songs written by Simone. The song was released as a single, and it was boycotted in certain southern states. Specifically, promotional copies were smashed by a Carolina radio station and returned to Simone's record label. Simone later recalled how "Mississippi Goddam" was her "first civil rights song" and that the song came to her "in a rush of fury, hatred and determination". The song was a direct challenge to widely held beliefs that race relations could change gradually and called for more immediate developments, "me and my people are just about due". "Old Jim Crow", on the same album, addressed the Jim Crow laws.

From then on, a civil rights message was standard in Simone's recording repertoire, becoming a part of her live performances. During the rise of her political activism, the release of her musical work grew more infrequent. Simone performed and spoke at many civil rights meetings, such as at the Selma to Montgomery marches. Simone advocated violent revolution during the civil rights period, rather than Martin Luther King's non-violent approach, and she hoped that African Americans could, by armed combat, form a separate state. Her message to the public signified the transition from the non-violent approach to social change that was advocated by Martin Luther King into the more militant state that was implemented by Malcolm X and the associates of the Black Nationalist Movement. Nevertheless, she wrote in her autobiography that she and her family regarded all races as equal.

Simone moved from Philips to RCA Victor during 1967. She sang "Backlash Blues", written by her friend and Harlem Renaissance leader, Langston Hughes, on her first RCA album, Nina Simone Sings the Blues (1967). On Silk & Soul (1967), she recorded Billy Taylor's "I Wish I Knew How It Would Feel to Be Free" and "Turning Point". The album 'Nuff Said! (1968) contains live recordings from the Westbury Music Fair, April 7, 1968, three days after the murder of Martin Luther King, Jr. She dedicated the whole performance to him and sang "Why? (The King Of Love Is Dead)", a song written by her bass player, Gene Taylor, directly after the news of King's death had reached them. In the summer of 1969, she performed at the Harlem Cultural Festival in Harlem's Mount Morris Park.

Together with Weldon Irvine, Simone turned Lorraine Hansberry's unfinished play To Be Young, Gifted and Black into a civil rights song. Hansberry had been a personal friend whom Simone credited with cultivating her social and political consciousness. She performed the song live on the album Black Gold (1970). A studio recording was released as a single, and renditions of the song have been recorded by Aretha Franklin (on her 1972 album Young, Gifted and Black) and by Donny Hathaway.

Later life (1974–1993)

In an interview for Jet magazine, Simone stated that her controversial song "Mississippi Goddam" hurt her career. She claimed that the music industry reprimanded her by boycotting her records. Hurt and disappointed, Simone left the US in September 1970, flying to Barbados and expecting Stroud to communicate with her when she had to perform again. However, Stroud interpreted Simone's sudden disappearance, and the fact that she had left behind her wedding ring, as an indication of a desire for a divorce. As her manager, Stroud was in charge of Simone's income.

Simone recorded her last album for RCA, It Is Finished, in 1974, and did not make another record until 1978, when she was persuaded to go into the recording studio by CTI Records owner Creed Taylor. The result was the album Baltimore, which, while not a commercial success, was fairly well received critically and marked a quiet artistic renaissance in Simone's recording output. Her choice of material retained its eclecticism, ranging from spiritual songs to Hall & Oates' "Rich Girl." Four years later Simone recorded Fodder on My Wings on a French label.

During the 1980s, Simone performed regularly at Ronnie Scott's Jazz Club in London, where she recorded the album Live at Ronnie Scott's in 1984. Although her early on-stage style could be somewhat haughty and aloof, in later years, Simone particularly seemed to enjoy engaging her audiences sometimes by recounting humorous anecdotes related to her career and music and by soliciting requests. In 1987, the original 1958 recording of "My Baby Just Cares for Me" was used in a commercial for Chanel No. 5 perfume in Britain. This led to a re-release of the recording, which stormed to number 4 on the UK's NME singles chart, giving her a brief surge in popularity in the UK.

When Simone returned to the United States, she learned that a warrant had been issued for her arrest for unpaid taxes (as a protest against her country's involvement with the Vietnam War), and returned to Barbados to evade the authorities and prosecution. Simone stayed in Barbados for quite some time and she had a lengthy affair with the Prime Minister, Errol Barrow. A close friend, singer Miriam Makeba, then persuaded her to go to Liberia. Later, she lived in Switzerland and the Netherlands, before settling in France in 1993. During a 1998 performance in Newark, she announced, "If you're going to come see me again, you've got to come to France, because I ain't coming back."

Simone published her autobiography, I Put a Spell on You, in 1992. She recorded her last album, A Single Woman in 1993, where she depicted herself as such "single woman." This album reflected her solitude and pain. She continued to tour through the 1990s but rarely traveled without an entourage. During the last decade of her life, Simone had sold more than one million records making her a global catalog best-seller. This was accompanied by the CD revolution, global exposure through media television and the novelty of the Internet.

Illness and death

Simone had been diagnosed with bipolar disorder in the late 1980s. In 1993, Simone settled near Aix-en-Provence in Southern France. She had suffered from breast cancer for several years before she died in her sleep at her home in Carry-le-Rouet, Bouches-du-Rhône on April 21, 2003. Her funeral service was attended by singers Miriam Makeba and Patti LaBelle, poet Sonia Sanchez, actor Ossie Davis, actress Ruby Dee, and hundreds of others. Simone's ashes were scattered in several African countries. She is survived by her daughter, Lisa Celeste Stroud, an actress and singer, who took the stage name Simone, and has appeared on Broadway in Aida.

Personality

Simone was known for her temper and frequent outbursts. In 1995, she fired a gun at a record company executive, whom she accused of stealing royalties. Simone said she "tried to kill him" but "missed". In 1995, she shot and wounded her neighbor's son with an air gun after the boy's laughter disturbed her concentration. According to a biographer, Simone took medication for a condition from the mid-1960s on. All this was only known to a small group of intimates, and kept out of public view for many years, until the biography Break Down and Let It All Out written by Sylvia Hampton and David Nathan revealed this in 2004, after her death. Singer-songwriter Janis Ian, a one-time friend of Simone's, related in her own autobiography, Society's Child: My Autobiography, two incidents to illustrate Simone's volatility: One incident in which she forced a shoe store cashier, at gunpoint, to take back a pair of sandals she'd already worn; and another in which Simone demanded a royalty payment from Ian herself as an exchange for having recorded one of Ian's songs, and then ripped a pay telephone out of its wall when she was refused.

Musical style

Simone standards

Throughout her career, Simone assembled a collection of songs that would later become standards in her repertoire. Some were songs that she wrote herself, while others were new arrangements of other standards, and others had been written especially for the singer. Her first hit song in America was her rendition of George Gershwin's "I Loves You, Porgy" (1958). It peaked at number 18 in the pop singles chart and number 2 on the black singles chart. During that same period Simone recorded "My Baby Just Cares for Me", which would become her biggest success years later, in 1987, after it was featured in a 1986 Chanel No. 5 perfume commercial. A music video was also created by Aardman Studios. Well known songs from her Philips albums include "Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood" on Broadway-Blues-Ballads (1964), "I Put a Spell on You", "Ne me quitte pas" (a rendition of a Jacques Brel song) and "Feeling Good" on I Put a Spell On You (1965), "Lilac Wine" and "Wild Is the Wind" on Wild is the Wind (1966).

"Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood", "Feeling Good", and "Sinner Man" (Pastel Blues, 1965) have remained popular in terms of cover versions (most notably a version of the former song by The Animals), sample usage, and its use on soundtracks for various movies, TV-series, and video games. "Sinner Man" has been featured in the TV series Scrubs, Person of Interest, The Blacklist, Sherlock, and Vinyl, as well as in movies such as The Thomas Crown Affair, Miami Vice, and Inland Empire, and sampled by artists such as Talib Kweli and Timbaland. The song "Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood" was sampled by Devo Springsteen on "Misunderstood" from Common's 2007 album Finding Forever, and by little-known producers Rodnae and Mousa for the song "Don't Get It" on Lil Wayne's 2008 album Tha Carter III. "See-Line Woman" was sampled by Kanye West for "Bad News" on his album 808s & Heartbreak. The 1965 rendition of "Strange Fruit," originally recorded by Billie Holiday was sampled by Kanye West for "Blood on the Leaves" on his album Yeezus.

Simone's years at RCA-Victor spawned a number of singles and album tracks that were popular, particularly in Europe. In 1968, it was "Ain't Got No, I Got Life", a medley from the musical Hair from the album 'Nuff Said! (1968) that became a surprise hit for Simone, reaching number 4 on the UK Singles Chart and introducing her to a younger audience. In 2006, it returned to the UK Top 30 in a remixed version by Groovefinder.

The following single, a rendition of the Bee Gees's "To Love Somebody", also reached the UK Top 10 in 1969. "The House of the Rising Sun" was featured on Nina Simone Sings the Blues in 1967, but Simone had recorded the song in 1961 and it was featured on Nina at the Village Gate (1962), predating the versions by Dave Van Ronk and Bob Dylan. It was later covered by The Animals, for whom it became a signature hit.

Performing style

Simone's bearing and stage presence earned her the title "High Priestess of Soul". She was a piano player, singer and performer, "separately, and simultaneously." As a composer and arranger, Simone moved from gospel to blues, jazz, and folk, and to numbers with European classical styling. Besides using Bach-style counterpoint, she called upon the particular virtuosity of the 19th-century Romantic piano repertoire—Chopin, Liszt, Rachmaninoff, and others. Onstage, she incorporated monologues and dialogues with the audience into the program, and often used silence as a musical element. She compared it to "mass hypnosis. I use it all the time." Throughout most of her life and recording career she was accompanied by percussionist Leopoldo Fleming and guitarist and musical director Al Schackman.

Legacy and influence

Music

Musicians who have cited Simone as important for their own musical upbringing include Elton John (who named one of his pianos after her), Madonna, Aretha Franklin, Adele, David Bowie, Emeli Sandé, Antony and the Johnsons, Dianne Reeves, Sade, Beyoncé, Janis Joplin, Nick Cave, Van Morrison, Christina Aguilera, Elkie Brooks, Talib Kweli, Mos Def, Kanye West, Lena Horne, Bono, John Legend, Elizabeth Fraser, Cat Stevens, Anna Calvi, Lykke Li, Peter Gabriel, Maynard James Keenan, Cedric Bixler-Zavala, Mary J. Blige, Fantasia Barrino, Michael Gira, Angela McCluskey, Lauryn Hill, Patrice Babatunde, Alicia Keys, Lana Del Rey, Hozier, Matt Bellamy, Ian MacKaye, Kerry Brothers, Jr., Krucial, Amanda Palmer, Steve Adey and Jeff Buckley. John Lennon cited Simone's version of "I Put a Spell on You" as a source of inspiration for the Beatles' song "Michelle".

Simone's music has been featured in soundtracks of various motion pictures and video games, including but not limited to, La Femme Nikita (1990), Point of No Return (1993), The Big Lebowski (1998), Notting Hill (1999), Any Given Sunday (1999), The Thomas Crown Affair (1999), Disappearing Acts (2000), Six Feet Under (2001), The Dancer Upstairs (2002), Before Sunset (2004), Cellular (2004), Inland Empire (2006), Miami Vice (2006), Sex and the City (2008), The World Unseen (2008), Revolutionary Road (2008), Home (2008), Watchmen (2009), The Saboteur (2009), Repo Men (2010), and Beyond the Lights (2014). Frequently her music is used in remixes, commercials, and TV series including "Feeling Good", which featured prominently in the Season Four Promo of Six Feet Under (2004). Simone's "Take Care of Business" is the closing theme of The Man from U.N.C.L.E. (2015) Simone's "Stars" is played during the final moments of the season 3 finale of BoJack Horseman.

Film

The documentary Nina Simone: La légende (The Legend) was made in the 1990s by French filmmakers, based on her autobiography I Put a Spell on You. It features live footage from different periods of her career, interviews with family, various interviews with Simone then living in the Netherlands, and while on a trip to her birthplace. A portion of footage from The Legend was taken from an earlier 26-minute biographical documentary by Peter Rodis, released in 1969 and entitled simply, Nina. Her filmed 1976 performance at the Montreux Jazz Festival is available on video courtesy of Eagle Rock Entertainment and is screened annually in New York City at an event called "The Rise and Fall of Nina Simone: Montreux, 1976" which is curated by Tom Blunt.

Footage of Simone singing "Mississippi Goddamn" for 40,000 marchers at the end of the Selma to Montgomery marches can be seen in the 1970 documentary King: A Filmed Record... Montgomery to Memphis and the 2015 Liz Garbus documentary, What Happened, Miss Simone?

Plans for a Simone biographical film were released at the end of 2005, to be based on Simone's autobiography I Put a Spell on You (1992) and to focus on her relationship in later life with her assistant, Clifton Henderson, who died in 2006; Simone's daughter, Simone Kelly, has since refuted the existence of a romantic relationship between Simone and Henderson on account of his homosexuality. Cynthia Mort, screenwriter of Will & Grace and Roseanne, has written the screenplay and directed the film, Nina, which stars Zoe Saldana in the title role. In May 2014, the film was shown to potential distributors at the Cannes Film Festival, but has, as of August 2014, not been seen by reviewers.

In 2015, two documentary features about Simone's life and music were released. The first, directed by Liz Garbus, What Happened, Miss Simone? was produced in cooperation with Simone's estate and her daughter, who also served as the film's executive producer. The film was produced as a counterpoint to the unauthorized Cynthia Mort film, and featured previously unreleased archival footage. It premiered at the Sundance Film Festival in January 2015 and was distributed by Netflix on June 26, 2015. It was nominated on January 14, 2016 for a 2016 Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature. The Amazing Nina Simone is an independent film directed by Jeff L. Lieberman and is also scheduled for release in 2015. The director initially consulted with Simone's daughter before going the independent route and instead worked closely with her siblings, predominantly Sam Waymon.

Honors

Simone was the recipient of a Grammy Hall of Fame Award in 2000 for her interpretation of "I Loves You, Porgy." She has also received fifteen Grammy Award nominations. On Human Kindness Day 1974 in Washington, D.C., more than 10,000 people paid tribute to Simone. Simone received two honorary degrees in music and humanities, from the University of Massachusetts Amherst and Malcolm X College. She preferred to be called "Dr. Nina Simone" after these honors were bestowed upon her.

Two days before her death, Simone was awarded an honorary degree by the Curtis Institute of Music, the music school that had refused to admit her as a student at the beginning of her career.

In 2002, the city of Nijmegen, Netherlands, named a street after her, the Nina Simone straat; she had lived in Nijmegen between 1988 and 1990. On August 29, 2005, the city of Nijmegen, concert hall De Vereeniging, and more than fifty artists (amongst whom were Frank Boeijen, Rood Adeo, and Fay Claassen) honoured Simone with the tribute concert Greetings from Nijmegen.

Simone was inducted into the North Carolina Music Hall of Fame in 2009.

In 2010, a statue in her honor was erected in Trade Street in her native Tryon, North Carolina.

Wikipedia