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#kept the tag because it's true
lindalofbroome · 7 months
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it was mid-autumn festival recently and i wanted to take the opportunity to make dq characters share mooncake :')
ngl my plan was to elaborate on my headcanons for ancient del culture (aka before the shadowlord eroded Del over time) but i don't really have the energy so maybe i'll come back another time with my thoughts
but the short version is that the Topaz is their talisman, and its powers and traits are relative to the Del people. so in this instance, the importance of the moon to the Topaz's power is in parallel to its importance to the people. (what that means is up for interpretation. i have ideas but you may have others)
anyway maybe post-DQ3 they do a harvest festival, or maybe even dragon night itself, and people make some form of mooncake to share with loved ones <3
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mattodore · 10 months
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100 questions with Matthias | playlist, pinterest | ←
1. What common traits do you share with your oc? What about them is the least like you?
Hm… I think Matthias and I are similar in that we’re both all-in when it comes to love, but I think just about every other aspect of Matthias’s personality and life are different from mine. Or, I hope so... lmao.
2. Do you think you would get along with your oc if you could meet them? What things would you talk about?
Absolutely not. I would be calling for this man’s beheading online. He wouldn’t like me either (let it be clear that he doesn’t like much of anyone, though). If we had to have a conversation I’d maybe listen to his thoughts on literature or history. I like listening to people much more intelligent than myself talking about the things that interest them. I wouldn’t be able to keep up with him, though.
3. How competent would your oc be in a survival situation? Would they be better off on their own or in a group?
Incredibly competent. Matthias is a savant with huge swaths of knowledge touching on a countless number of subjects, has analytical prowess, is strong and sturdy, manipulative, charming, and a natural born leader. He has all the makings of a solid survivor and could wind up on the other side of any survival scenario as the head of some fucked up cult, honestly, but…. If the situation in question is dire or inconvenient enough he’s simply not going to bother. He’d let someone else kill him off without putting up a fight. And I’d say he’s better in a group just because he needs people to make him feel real.
4. Is your oc a daredevil, or more of a scaredy cat? What is the most daring thing they’ve done in their life?
Daredevil. Matthias has little value for his own life and often winds up doing some rather outrageous things in order to feel anything other than the numbness he's used to. I think the most daring thing he’s ever done has to be blackmailing the headmaster of his boarding school just because of the sheer gall of it.
5. What is your oc’s patience like? When waiting for something, are they able to sit still or do they fidget? How do they fidget?
Matthias is never in any kind of rush. He leans and lounges and sprawls. He doesn’t move much, but I think he does have a certain lofty demeanor about himself when he’s waiting that’s reminiscent of a big cat swishing its tail and flicking its ear; if he’s crossing his legs you’ll see his foot sort of dip and swish while he’s waiting… he taps his forefinger on his temple… and he stares very intensely.
6. How much thought does your oc put into what they wear/look like? Any reason why?
Matthias pretty much figured out what worked best for him when he was a teenager and has stuck with it since then. He has a simple skin care routine and only uses a few hair care products, so it’s not something he has to put much thought into anymore as it’s all just rote memory now. 
In terms of his clothing, he’s not very adventurous and knows what already works versus what doesn’t. He gravitates toward pieces that flatter his physique while also remaining in a color palette more suitable to his tastes (he likes plain clothing without logos or lettering and wears blacks, grays, whites, and darker shades). 
But Matthias also has a dermatologist, a stylist, and a personal trainer on retainer… he could always get them on the line if he needed to. 
7. Does your oc collect anything? What about knowledge or facts? How big is their collection?
No material possessions, but he does seek out knowledge, if that counts? He also owns a lot of books, but not because he’s collecting them on purpose… he just reads a lot.
8. What kind of flavors does your oc like? How much spice can they handle?
I think he likes both sweet and bitter flavors the most. He’s used to eating a wide array of foods, so I don’t think there’s any flavor he doesn’t like exactly. Matthias can’t handle spice at all, though, which is a shame because he does actually like the flavor. Theo finds this to be very funny, by the way… he thinks Matthias is cute when he’s trying to play off how badly the food is getting to him while drinking water in these precise, measured gulps that’re meant to be subtle but just make it all the more obvious that he’s kind of dying. His ears and the back of his neck go all red while eating spicy food.
9. How easily does your oc trust others? Any particular reason why? How trustworthy are they themselves?
Matthias doesn’t trust easily at all. I think it’s partly because he never had anyone to trust in those development years of his childhood, but also partly because of the way in which his mother shipped him off to a reformation school to be abused and tortured and then essentially abandoned him there. Even despite never being close with his mother or even particularly loving her… he still knew that there was something meant to be there between a mother and their child that was… betrayed. So he finds it nearly impossible to give his trust over to another person, especially because he hides so much of his real desires, impulses, and personality from the world. Imani is the first person to ever gain that trust and the only person after to get it from Matthias is Theo. 
As for himself… it depends on who you are. If it’s Imani or Theo that are putting their trust in him, then they can be assured that they will never have to doubt him. If it’s someone else, however… he’s only trustworthy when it suits him and his little games. He lies a lot just for the hell of it, cheats often, and amuses himself with the power of holding secrets. Do not trust this man.
10. What are some of your oc’s pet peeves? How do they handle it when the annoyance doesn’t stop?
Matthias was trained in etiquette for years, and despite frequent participation in debauchery as an adult, and a strong distaste for rules, some of his training has stuck with him regardless. That is to say that poor table manners make him feel homicidal. Open mouthed chewing and talking with your mouth full has to be what he finds the most atrocious, especially as it nearly makes him nauseous. His way of handling these annoyances is to simply leave without another word, no matter how important the conversation or the person having it with him is.
11. Does your oc have a good sense of direction? Do they get lost easily?
Matthias has a very good memory (a detriment, really, considering how much there is in his life that he’d really like to forget) and a good sense of direction follows that naturally. He hardly ever gets lost.
12. How well would your oc handle being placed in a leadership position?
Like a fish to water. Matthias has lived his whole life placed at the top of the food chain and leading the pack already. He takes up that space with grace. But does he actually want it? Well… no, he’s rather bored of it now. He wants someone to follow instead but so few people are deserving of his devotion… 
13. What is your oc’s confidence like? Are they self-confident to the point of being arrogant? Are they terribly self-deprecating?
Matthias has the confidence of a man who has never found himself to be intellectually inferior to anyone and has only ever stood above everyone else. He’s arrogant and disdainful. Comes with the turf that he also likes himself a great deal… he’s prideful to an irritatingly high degree unless you’re into that sort of thing.
14. What is your oc’s speech like? How loud are they usually? Do they have an accent or a stutter?
Matthias is silver-tongued. He enunciates every word carefully and speaks very precisely. He speaks confidently and never mumbles or stutters. However, if he lets his mind wander or slip (whether aided by intoxication or just simple distraction) his Polish accent—which was trained away when very young—slips through the cracks. You can hear his accent most notably over the letter “a” in words (Bambi becomes Bahmbi, for instance… which I mentioned months ago but now there’s the added context that this is his nickname for Theo… grins a little). 
15. What is your oc’s memory like? Do they remember certain things better than others? Do they have any strategies to better remember things?
Perhaps it’s because of how regularly he exercised his mind from a very young age, but Matthias’s memory is astounding. More than anything, though, what his memory latches onto most is violence. The traumas of his teenage years have followed him like a second shadow. His dreadful nightmares are fueled by just how much he remembers of his time at the reformation school he was sent to from ages 15-18.
16. How affectionate is your oc? How do they convey their affection? By being touchy, or through more subtle ways?
Platonically? He’s very warm with Imani. He often holds out his arm to her so she can place her hand on his bicep as they take walks in the morning. I don’t think they verbally affirm to one another how much they love and care for each other, but that’s mostly just because they already know they do from over a decade of friendship. Plus, Imani kind of has a hard time accepting love from others, so that’s also why Matthias doesn’t speak to his love for her as his dearest friend.
Romantically? Matthias is always showing his affection and love for Theo openly and without shame. He meets Theo’s needs exactly where they are, seeing in Theo just how badly he needs to be reassured and pursued, even when Theo is still trying to deny himself what he desires. Matthias conveys his affection most through words of affirmation and acts of service. He’s always in Theo’s ear whispering about how his heart beats through Theo’s or how nice he’ll be to and for Theo, how good… how he’d crawl for him… he’s incredibly devoted and Theo is very aware of that fact. Make no mistake, though, Matthias is also affectionate in other ways as well. He’s incredibly tactile with Theo, because Theo’s most comforted by the physical reassurance that Matthias is there to catch him, you know? If Theo falls, he’s got him. Matthias also isn’t shy about voicing how badly he wants Theo either. Time and place don’t matter to him at all when faced with Theo’s presence (or, even, the absence of his presence; Matthias wants him all the time). Matthias would let Theo do anything to him. He could ask anything of him.
17. How polite is your oc? Do they know how to act in a formal situation? How would they *actually* act in a formal situation?
Matthias is… hm. Generally speaking, he’s polite, but it’s not exactly… sincere. He’s all charm and pretense, I mean… he’s just following the social contract to get what he wants. In formal situations, he’s the picture perfect gentleman. He has a lot of experience from etiquette lessons to cotillions and has undergone rigorous training in boarding school to ensure infallible success in the upper echelons of society.
18. How physically strong is your oc? Is their agility or endurance better?
Matthias is very strong. You can tell just by looking at him that he’s strapping. His muscles aren’t the kind that are just for show… he’s thick all over and isn’t concerned about having a movie star six pack. He wants real, animalistic strength. He wants to ensure he’s never put in a situation where he can’t protect himself ever again. And I’d say his endurance is better than his agility by nature of having previously undergone a lot of forced labor. Plus, he’s had to adapt and has a high pain tolerance now that he’s in his twenties, so aside from, like, pretty high stamina, his actual ability to endure pain itself is high.
19. What is your oc’s creative skillset? Music, drawing, writing, dancing, etc.? Or are they lacking creativity entirely?
Hm. I think he’s not very… imaginative? Creatively, I think Matthias is very much someone who just sees what’s there… he doesn’t draw from it and add on, you know what I mean? He does some art, but it’s observational realism. He sketches landscapes almost exclusively (in fact, it’s one of the things he does in the mornings). He has a lot of free time not only because of the nature of his lifestyle but also because of how little he sleeps… so he’s had a lot of time to practice and is good at it. He’s trained in ballroom dancing but he’s not explored any other kinds of dance and doesn’t try letting loose any other way. He can play the viola and the piano (as he’s legally required to do as a fictional rich love interest™), but doesn’t compose his own pieces. He’s not a writer, surprisingly, despite reading obsessively… I don’t believe he’s ever even tried writing himself. Well, he does journal, on occasion, but that’s just drawing from his real life… his imagination is stilted. One could draw the conclusion that this is perhaps because of the childhood he had or a result of trauma… hm. Take your pick.
20. Does your oc have any favorite games to pass the time? What other hobbies do they have?
Well… he plays mind games, if you count those. He likes messing with people. Other hobbies… well, what I just mentioned in the previous question, for starters. Hm… I think he treats sex as a hobby. He reads a lot and always has. Birdwatching. Going on walks. I think he’s pretty boring, honestly. Sorry, Matthias. No, um… I really think he just… appreciates the world. It sounds weird to say, considering he’s rather nihilistic… but I feel as though his nihilism actually plays a part in why he just… sits back and appreciates what’s there, because what else is there? The birds in the trees, the rising and setting of the sun, the movement of his body while dancing, the base pleasures of his sexual appetite… yeah. That’s what life is. Experiencing it is his hobby, I suppose.
21. Is your oc expressive, or would they rather conceal their emotions? What are their typical expressions like?
Matthias isn’t very expressive. Sure, he smirks and offers an inscrutable smile, but… he’s hardly ever actually expressing his true emotions or thoughts. I’d say he normally has an intense, persistent stare no matter which mask he’s wearing for the evening. If he smiles, it doesn’t meet his eyes. He’ll raise a brow if he’s amused, and his mouth will quirk, but he never fully laughs—not easily, at least. You’d have to work very hard to earn a laugh from him.
22. How easily does your oc fare in the sun? Do they tan or burn easily? Are they completely unaffected?
Matthias wears sunscreen every day and is meticulous about reapplying it. If he tans, it’s very light. Mostly he just burns. Trust that he complains about this all the time to Imani as she’s often the one with him while poolside. She thinks it’s hilarious, because even when they were kids he’d burn along the bridge of his nose just from being out for a handful of hours in the courtyard of their boarding school.
23. How graceful is your oc? Are they elegant in their movements, or more clumsy?
Matthias is poised and confident in his movements and commands attention through them. He glides gracefully around the room when he’s entertaining guests and mingling. His tread is light, despite his size, and he has a tendency to creep up on people when they’re not looking. The way he moves is unsettling to some who’re watching on the outskirts, because it often appears as if he’s prowling. 
24. Is your oc a romantic, or are they grossed out by the simple mention of anything romantic?
Oh, Matthias is a true romantic when he finds someone worthy of his affection. Or, rather than just his affection, should I say his absolute devotion? He worships at Theo’s feet. He’d debase himself just for a rare glimpse of Theo’s smile. He’s at Theo’s beck and call.
Additionally, Matthias would never be disgusted by any of his desires or urges as he doesn’t let society dictate how he feels about anything; rather, the more his desires deviate from what society at large deems acceptable, the more he’d delight in them. So the love he feels is something he exalts, even when it skews off in jagged directions.
25. How stubborn is your oc? Are they open to considering different options or opinions, or are they more closed off?
Matthias is pretty stubborn, I think. He values his own opinions above all others. He’ll move only if he’s been proved wrong or outsmarted… which is something that always gives him a delicious little thrill. He loves meeting people who can get the better of him.
26. How does your oc sleep? Do they move around a lot? What position does your oc normally sleep in? What are their typical bedding arrangements like?
Matthias is an insomniac and gets very little sleep. When he does sleep… hm… I think he doesn’t move around much unless it’s to accommodate someone else in the bed with him (Theo…). Matthias sleeps on his back using one pillow under his head. He doesn’t like feeling constricted, so he sleeps naked with only a sheet covering his body, his comforter put away in the storage bench at the foot of his bed and only brought back out to make the bed in the morning.
27. What is your oc’s sleep schedule like? Are they a night owl, an early morning riser, or do they get any sleep at all?
Matthias likes the mornings best. I think he normally manages to get some sleep in at around 11AM-1PM in the day. Theo actually helps him fall asleep… Matthias will lay his head in Theo’s lap while Theo’s studying and the motion of Theo’s fingers carding through his hair will put him to sleep like a child with warm milk. His nightmares ease around Theo.
28. How organized is your oc? How important is organization to your oc?
Matthias is very efficient and organized. It’s personally very important to him to keep his area clean as it was a habit he developed in boarding school.
29. If a perfume was to be made to represent your oc, what sorts of smells would be included in it?
I think Matthias’s signature fragrance is already a good enough representation of who he is. He wears Francis Kurkdjian’s Oud Extrait de parfum. A strong scent that’s spicy and rich with saffron notes that’re soft and leathery. He smells warm and masculine without being ostentatious.
30. How caring/empathetic is your oc? Are they the type to immediately adopt and protect others, or are they a true sadist?
Matthias has very little empathy for people who aren’t of his concern. I wouldn’t go so far as to call him a true sadist… but he does have violent urges and enjoys toying with people. He’s protective of children and teenagers, though… it’s not something often seen, as he has no reason to be around younger people, but… Imani’s seen it first hand with her younger brother.
31. What inspired the creation of your oc? Any specific things, a general aesthetic or idea, or something completely random?
Theo. I’ve talked about this over here, but Matthias as a character exists because of Theo. His actual appearance is meant to contrast Theo’s. His life is meant to mirror Theo’s. His personality is both a mix of hard differences and similarities to Theo’s.
32. How judgemental is your oc? Do they keep an open mind about people, or are they the type to judge a book by its cover?
Matthias isn’t actually all that judgy. I mean, he definitely looks down his nose at people, but that’s hardly their fault. I’d say he’s open minded, but he’s also a lofty asshole.
33. What five objects or things could be expected to be found on your oc’s person at any time? Why?
Matthias doesn’t have material possessions that he feels he has to carry around at all times. 
But… I suppose he’d have his phone on him, a watch on his wrist, and his driving gloves tucked away in his back pocket. He doesn’t have a wallet, but he does have a card he’ll carry in one of his pockets. He doesn’t carry keys, as he has people who’ll let him inside his home when he needs to be let in. 
When he’s dating Theo, though, he often makes sure he has a hair tie or two on his wrist as well (which does in fact make me feel insane, thanks for asking). 
34. Does your oc have a pet? If they could have another one or if they were to get one, what would it be? How well could they care for it?
Surprisingly, yes. Matthias has a cat named Odious. By nature of Matthias being rich, Odious is spoiled, but not exactly by Matthias himself. He’s not very affectionate, but he does like her. She just wandered onto one of the estates and didn’t leave.
35. Does your oc have any distinguishing markings? Scars, tattoos, birthmarks, freckles, etc?
Matthias has a very noticeable scar on his chin from a decanter his mother threw at his face when he was fifteen years-old. I do think he’d have more scars on his body from the three years he spent at a reformation boarding school, but I haven’t yet decided where or to what extent the scarring goes. He has no birthmarks, freckles, moles, or tattoos otherwise. 
36. What is your oc’s fight or flight response like? What sorts of things provoke it the most?
Matthias is the fight response without question, but it takes a lot to get him to break and resort to it. Matthias has an impeccable amount of control over his own impulses and can hold off on reacting for a long time. But when his control snaps and he turns violent, it’s most likely a response to Theo getting hurt in some way. He has very little control when it comes to Theo.
37. How does your oc handle heavy stress? Do they have any specific coping mechanisms? Are they healthy or not?
Matthias gives the impression of being impenetrable, but I do think stress is something he feels. If he’s stressed, it’s most likely because of mental challenges he’s facing. As for coping mechanisms for it… he probably doesn’t have any, just by nature of stress being something he chooses to ignore most of the time. Hm… I can’t imagine he’d handle it any differently than how he normally handles his other challenges: with wine, sex, and a crowd of murmuring bodies.
38. What does your oc do to relax? Any specific activities? Why?
By all means, Matthias definitely seems as if he’d be pretty relaxed, but he’s actually on edge a fair amount. His insomnia gets pretty awful at times and he has audible hallucinations. The best way he’s found to deal with it is to relax outside, listening to the sound of the birds and letting the breeze ease the fevered rush of noise his mind tries tricking him with. He doesn’t live close to people at all, so he knows the hallucinations aren’t real (mostly, he hears screaming)… still, it’s not like he enjoys them. He views it as a weakness of his.
39. Does your oc have any nicknames? What are the origins of them? If they don’t, can you come up with some possible ones?
Matthias doesn’t like when his name is shortened, so he doesn’t have any nicknames based on his actual name. Hm... Imani calls him baby whenever she’s making fun of him, if that counts? It’s not really a nickname, though, but whatever. Theo doesn’t use nicknames with Matthias, I don’t think, but Matthias would go crazy for it if Theo ever did. He’d do anything to hear Theo call him his pet… I’d bet he fantasizes about it all the time. I’m sure he’s probably coaxed Theo into calling him a few nicknames during sex, though, so there's that.
40. What languages does your oc know? Are there any they want to learn but haven’t had the chance to? How good are they at picking up new ones?
Matthias is a polyglot. He can speak and write in Polish (and can generally understand a handful of other Slavic languages), English, Spanish, and French. He also knows ASL.
Matthias wants to be able to read as many languages as he can. Right now he’s learning Mandarin but is in the early stages of memorization. He’ll probably start working toward learning either Arabic or Hindi next… I’m not sure. He likes Arabic poetry (the translated forms he’s read) a lot, so that’s probably what he’ll gravitate toward.
41. What was the worst injury your oc ever suffered? Has it had any long lasting impact on them?
His worst injury has to be the broken ribs and punctured lung he got while he was at the reformation school. It’s the source of one of his most frequent nightmares.
42. Is your oc an optimist or a pessimist? Any particular reason why?
I’m honestly not sure that Matthias goes either which way. Everything is so… nothing to him that not even I can say how he feels in concrete terms. I don’t think he feels like there’s going to be better days ahead! or that everything is awful and will be awful forever. He’s just… apathetic.
43. How important are the rules to your oc? Do they follow them to a t, or do they enjoy breaking them?
Matthias has never seriously cared about rules and in actuality spurns them. The only time he observes them is when he can use them to his advantage or because he’s had to in order to ensure his safety.
44. How violent is your oc? Or are they more of a pacifist? To what lengths will they go to start/avoid a conflict?
Well… he’s had violent urges since he was very young. He doesn’t act on them hardly ever (now, at least), but they are there in his mind. And Matthias doesn’t avoid conflict per se, but there’s very little that he views as worthy of his attention in that way. He gets mad for a time, sure, but then he lets it go. When he does act on his urges, it’s… well. It gets bloody fast. He kind of lets it all out at once. 
45. How is your oc around animals? What about children?
Matthias is stilted with animals, including his pet cat. He talks to her like she’s a fully grown human person… he pets her a few times on the head and then pats her bum and tells her to go on her way. It’s a little funny, in my opinion. 
Matthias doesn’t really hang out in circles where children are present hardly ever, but when he is around them I think Matthias is surprisingly soft. He’s gentle with them and talks to them like they’re his equal; he doesn’t use baby talk or dismiss them. Kids really like him because of that. Matthias treats children and teenagers better than any of the adults in his life ever treated him.
46. Does your oc lie a lot, or is the truth very important to them? What is their reaction to other people lying to them?
Matthias thinks lying is fun, lmao. He only considers the truth to be important when he’s talking to people that he views as respectable. If he cares about you, he’s probably not going to lie to you. Perhaps it’s because of how good of a liar Matthias is, but he can see through lies eerily well. So when other people lie to him… hm. I think he enjoys it, because you can learn so much about people based on what they chose to lie about. He finds that fascinating.
He doesn’t like when Theo lies to him, though. Not about the important things at least, like Theo’s safety. It’s what Theo lies about the most to him.
47. How much of a prankster is your oc? Are their pranks truly evil, or more harmless, positive ones?
He doesn’t pull pranks. He thinks they’re simpleminded and uninspired. He can think of much more exciting ways to mess with people.
48. What are your oc’s nervous tics? Are they aware of them? Do they attempt to hide them?
When Matthias is nervous he’ll thumb at the scar on his chin. He catches himself doing it occasionally, but I don’t think he’s ever been aware of why exactly he does it. He stops himself when he realizes he’s going through the motions, though. He thinks the impulsivity of it is inelegant.
49. What would be the perfect gift for your oc? What would be their reaction to receiving it?
I’m honestly not sure. Matthias doesn’t necessarily care about material possessions, so you couldn’t really buy him something and expect much of a reaction from him for it. But I’m also not sure if there’s anything sentimental that would move him either. So not something made for him or something bought… but maybe something personal that belonged to you at some point. Hm. I think he’d let the mask slip and he’d offer a smile… a genuine thank you. He’d be fascinated by the choice of gift… it’d be different from what he’d expect someone to give him and it’d thrill him in that way.
50. How attentive is your oc? How perceptive are they? How easily do they get distracted?
Matthias models his behaviors off of others, so he’s attentive and watches closely. I think he’s perceptive, but not as much as his gaze might lead you to believe. Matthias can get caught up in his own orbit. His haughtiness gets in the way sometimes, so he slips when he’s having his ego stroked… it’s the best time to get one past him. Theo uses this to his advantage when he’s prevaricating and trying to avoid being caught lying.
51. If your oc was to receive an award for something, what would it most likely be for? Have they received any awards in the past?
Matthias has received numerous kinds of academic awards while in school. He’s also won awards for his manners and dancing in his etiquette lessons. No specific award I’d give him… not seriously, at least.
52. In what ways does your oc cope with anger? How easily angered are they? Do they lash out?
Matthias used to be a lot more aggressive when he was younger and was stubbornly argumentative, but he learned to control his… not anger, exactly, but his derision, as a natural consequence of physical violence at the reformation school he went to in his late teens. Matthias does get angry, but… he lets it go if it’s not actually worth his time. If you’ve pissed him off, he’ll give this tight, inscrutable smile and his eyes will glint once in warning before his features will smooth back over. He’ll keep staring until you get uncomfortable and look away first, change the subject, or leave. But if he’s actually furious over something that he can’t just ignore… he lashes out like a viper. You’ll get dizzy from how severely he dresses you down. Or he’ll hurt you, if your offense is grievous enough. I don’t think he’d be quick about that, though. He really does enjoy playing with people.
53. If your oc was to host a podcast or TV show, what would it be about? Would your oc actually be good at it? What sorts of guests would appear?
Oh God… Matthias absolutely cannot be given an audience. It would be detrimental to world order or something. Um… but I think he’d do great talking about history or literature… or manipulation tactics. I don’t think he’d have any guests on, though. He’s a one man show.
54. How would you describe your oc’s voice to sound like? Do you have any voice claims for them?
Matthias’s voice is low, cold, and seductive. There’s a gravitas to his voice and an arrogance you can just hear. If you close your eyes while Matthias is speaking, you’ll get the impression that you might need to crane your neck up to look at him… the force of his presence just spills over into every part of him, including his voice. He enunciates the letters in words precisely and has a measured way of speaking that adds a layer of… command to his words. 
I don’t have an exact voice claim… but I think his voice would sound like a harsher, deeper version of Michelle Gurevich's in Temptation (especially when Michelle’s voice starts to growl/rasp at the end of her words).
55. How sensitive to loud sound is your oc? Do they prefer constant high background noise, low background noise, or complete silence?
Hm… it depends on what the noise is coming from. He’s used to all kinds of distressing noises. In general, I’d say he prefers low background noise or silence.
56. What is your oc’s favorite color? If you had to choose one color to represent your oc, what would it be and why?
Matthias doesn’t have a favorite color… like, at all. And I’d say silver reflects him well… I can’t say why exactly, it’s just the first color that comes to me when I think of him. Maybe pale blue as well… he’s icy.
57. How good is your oc’s sight? Do they wear glasses? Do they need glasses? Do they have some form of night vision?
Matthias has perfect eyesight. The fucker.
58. How would you describe your oc’s appearance to someone who’s looking for them? What features would be most identifiable?
I think Matthias is actually incredibly easy to spot. I’d tell them to look for the tallest guy in the room who’s pale all over and broad shouldered. I honestly think that would be enough to spot him. I think his pale blond hair is the most identifiable feature he has, especially when light hits it.
59. How good at cooking is your oc? What can they cook/what is their favorite thing to cook?
While Matthias does have staff who’re paid specifically to cook for him, he actually waves them away a lot of the time to do it for himself instead. He’s a good cook. Not, like, Le Cinq level cooking, but he’s good regardless. I think Matthias spends a lot of time practicing things like cooking specifically to impress. He gives off the impression that he’s just innately talented at many things, but that’s by design. He’s actually worked very hard to develop the skills he has. It’s a fun aspect of his character, in my opinion. He seems like he wouldn’t care, but he actually cares a great deal.
(Additionally, being on Matthias’s payroll is pretty cozy, because oftentimes he just ends up doing what the staff are hired to do for himself and the staff still get paid regardless. Putting up with his uncomfortable staring and odd waking hours is worth it in the end.) 
60. How good is your oc at keeping track of time? Are they always late, always early, or always right on time?
Time slips away from Matthias frequently. He’s normally late to things, but because of his personality, a lot of people think he’s just being fashionable… he’s not. He genuinely just gets so wrapped up in whatever it is he’s doing that appointments on his schedule slip his mind and he winds up ten minutes late to everything.
61. Is your oc more quick-thinking, or do they take longer to figure things out?
He’s quick-thinking. His mind is agile and connects dots faster than most. But he’s not even half as perceptive as Theo despite having a similarly quick mind.
62. How quick is your oc? Do they have faster or slower reflexes? What things are they quickest at?
He’s both mentally and physically quick. He exercises regularly and boxes, which is something he would hardly be able to do well if he couldn’t react fast. The way he carries himself, his grace and poise, has also aided his reflexes. I think he reacts fastest when catching things… you should see how adeptly he can catch and maneuver Theo’s legs around him when Theo jumps on him.
63. How self-disciplined is your oc? Do they often think before they act, or the other way around?
Matthias is incredibly self-disciplined due to how he grew up and the experiences he had in his teens. He thinks first before acting, without a doubt. The times in which he does act first are always the moments in which his control snaps and he lashes out. He tries to avoid that happening as best as he can.
64. Which of the seven deadly sins does your oc fall under most? What about the seven heavenly virtues?
He’s lust, easily, but pride and wrath speak to him as well. 
As for the seven heavenly virtues, the only one I can even entertain for him is patience.
65. If you were to give your oc a new superpower, what would you choose and why? If *they* were to be able to choose, what would it be and why?
I was going to be funny here, but actually… I think I’d give him the ability to sleep whenever he wants. Is that really even a superpower? Probably not. But it’s all just made up anyway, so, sure. He’d have sleeping powers.
On the other hand, I think Matthias would be interested in something that could give him either greater knowledge or a deeper insight into the way people think. Telepathy, maybe? Not, like, mind control, or anything. That’s not very fun for him… he’d want to have to work for it more.
66. What sort of advice would people go to your oc for? What sort of advice is your oc actually good at giving?
I don’t think Matthias has the interest or sensitivity necessary to give people advice. I don’t know… he doesn’t really have many opportunities to try, anyway. I doubt Imani goes to him for advice when she’d rather handle things on her own, and Theo would never ask anyone for anything, especially for help. But I think Matthias would be the kind of person you would go to when you want to indulge. He’d stoke the flames of your passions and persuade you to reach for them rather than staying still.
67. How many people does your oc prefer to be around? A crowd, a few friends, or all on their own?
Matthias prefers to be in crowds of people. He has to feel alive somehow. He lives both because of others and through them. 
It’s only when he feels seen and understood through Theo that he begins to reassess and prefer the company of just a few friends and his lover.
68. What sorts of things would cheer your oc up when they’re down? Is your oc sad often, or is it more rare?
Rather than feeling sad exactly, Matthias is more unresponsive. I’d say he has a very childlike sadness buried deep down that he’s carried with him his whole life to the point that he’s now numb to it. Nothing cheers Matthias up, not really. Maybe Theo.
69. How energetic is your oc? Are they constantly tired, or constantly bouncing off the walls?
Matthias is an insomniac, so by nature he’s sort of always tired; however, Matthias has had nearly a decade to adjust and is a master of performance—you would never notice how exhausted he truly is. It’s not that he’s dull or low energy… but he’s languorous. All of his movements are languid and unhurried. Even the way he talks is measured… he draws things out. His actions only pick up if he’s excited by something. 
70. What about your oc’s lifestyle would they change if they had the ability? Why?
Nothing.
71. What is your oc’s go-to for offense? What weapon, what style of fighting? Or are words more their weapon of choice?
The personal trainer Matthias has had since he entered his twenties is an ex-boxer, so that’s how Matthias has learned to fight in a more refined, professional capacity. Before that, though, he learned how to fight from hands-on experience at the reformation school… meaning, he fought dirty and there was absolutely nothing off limits. He had to defend himself any way he could. Because of this, Matthias is rather crafty in what he’ll reach for to use in a fight, but he prefers to do it with his bare hands if it’s… a more personal attack. 
Matthias actually spars with Sehyuk at times to blow off steam. They’re never fighting to really hurt each other, which is good… Sehyuk could put Matthias out of commission for quite some time if they ever wound up actually fighting. Well, if they were playing clean. If they fought dirty it’d be a toss-up on who’d win. They’re both rather brutal.
72. What is your oc’s ideal environment like? Urban or natural? Fancy or rustic? What’s the weather like?
Matthias enjoys warm weather. He enjoys nature and likes tropical locations or locations that’re at a great distance away from other people. He likes being separate from everyone else at home… it gives him the space to drop the act and be who he really, truly is underneath it all. Space also allows him the clarity of knowing he’s just hearing things when he’s hallucinating. (Though, later this becomes unnecessary when Theo finds out about Matthias’s hallucinations and shows Matthias to record the things he thinks he’s hearing. If they don’t come through the recordings, then he knows they’re not real.)
73. If your oc were to be arrested, what would it most likely be for? Is it justified? Have they actually been arrested before?
Matthias has never actually been arrested, but if he were to be arrested for anything it’d be for public indecency, without question. Justified, obviously, because he’s fucking and sucking everywhere. 
74. How would your oc act when drunk? What about when really, really tired?
Matthias is very intense when he’s actually drunk. He’ll stare without talking for a long, unsettling amount of time. He forgets to mind his strength and leaves marks behind if he grabs an arm or a shoulder. He doesn’t shy away from voicing his thoughts, of which he doesn’t filter… meaning he says things that are weird and also deeply disturbing if he’s feeling angry (again, violent thoughts… he’s always had them). Matthias is also direct in a very blunt, unrefined way when he’s drunk—he’s always direct about what he wants, mind you, but normally he’s charming about it. The charm’s gone when he’s intoxicated. He’s incredibly meticulous about never drinking too much because of all of this.
When he hasn’t slept for days, I think he becomes… very quiet. He doesn’t even talk to himself, which is a thing he does frequently when alone (a habit from childhood). I think the softest he ever is is when he’s tired. Theo’s seen him like this a lot. He’ll lay his head down on Theo’s lap and just stare into space. If he speaks, it’s a few words at a time and that’s it. He becomes pliable… he’ll press into Theo’s touch and sigh… he’ll make quiet sounds of discomfort and hurt if Theo tries to shift away or leave. He’s clingy. The hallucinations are incessant if he hasn’t slept for a long time, so… I think that’s why he gets quiet. There’s already too much noise.
75. What would your oc’s dream home be like? How big would it be? What sorts of rooms would be in it? Where would it be located?
He doesn’t really have a dream home. To be clear, Matthias did actually buy himself a large home to his taste shortly after getting his inheritance… but it’s not like he’s attached to it. He doesn’t have that… desire for material things, including for where he lives. He dreams about locations, sure, but the actual house he lives in doesn’t factor into it. He just wants to live somewhere warm and in the heart of nature… he wants to always hear birds outside.
76. What is/was your oc’s relationship with their family like? Was it happy, tense, or abusive? What living family does your oc currently have, if any?
Matthias’s father died when he was fifteen and since then he’s been completely estranged from his mother as well. His relationships with both parents have always been nonexistent. His mother has resented him since birth and his father only saw him as a means to continue his legacy as well as a way to entrap his mother. Physical abuse came with his parents’ marriage, but Matthias is completely unaware of that fact as he was neglected and left on his own for nearly his entire childhood. I’d say he can hardly even recall a handful of instances where he interacted with his parents when he was young. Rather than being under the care of his parents as a child, Matthias was taken care of by the staff of the estate (who had orders not to interact with him more than necessary). He received no love, no praise, and no physical affection. He grew up on silence, literature, and the sounds of the birds in the gardens of his home. After his father promised him the entirety of his wealth in his will, his mother assaulted him physically and then sent him away to a reformation school that psychologically tortured and physically abused him until Imani got him out of there the day he turned eighteen.
77. Does your oc like to wear any particular accessories? Hats, jewelry, scarves, etc.?
The most Matthias wears are his driving gloves and one of his watches.
78. How socially skilled is your oc? Are they good at understanding social cues? How charismatic are they?
Matthias’s social skills are award winning. He’s exceptionally charismatic and well-mannered. Of course, that’s just for show. His grasp on social cues is stilted, but a smile can get him very, very far with that face and all that money.
79. For what reason would your oc turn into a villain? And if they’re already a villain, vice-versa?
Well… I think either way you view this question in relation to Matthias’s character, the answer is going to be because of Theo.
80. What is your oc’s handwriting like? How easy is it to read? Can they write/read cursive?
Matthias’s handwriting is clean and romantic. Huge swooping curves and artistic strokes. You can tell his handwriting has been something he’s worked very hard on perfecting. He writes in cursive most of the time, but not always. His print is sharp and clean, but not as extravagant.
81. How good is your oc at drawing? What is their preferred art medium, and what is their artstyle like?
Matthias is good at drawing. He draws in sketchbooks and prefers simple graphite pencils. His art style is observational realism. (Refer back to #19 for more on this.)
82. What would be your oc’s ultimate dream vacation? Where would they go? Who would they take with them? What would they do?
Whisking Theo away to wherever Theo will allow him to would be Matthias’s dream. Theo has many different responsibilities that he’s bound to… and, really, Matthias just wants to take him away from it all and keep him in bed for days. He wants Theo to rest and act on his own wants and desires for once. He wants Theo to be somewhere safe.
83. What is your oc’s favorite trait about themselves? What about their least liked? What would others like and dislike the most about your oc?
There’s nothing Matthias doesn’t like about himself, honestly. He favors his own intelligence the most.
I think he’s valued by others for his money the most, followed closely by his looks. Most people who haven’t been privy to Matthias with his mask off probably would say they feel uncomfortable when he goes silent and just… stares. If they’ve seen him without the pretense, then his derision is what they dislike most.
84. Is your oc more masculine, feminine, androgynous, or something else entirely?
I think he’s more masculine.
85. What would history remember your oc for? How would they become famous? Or are they the sort that would really only be appreciated long after their death?
In the Echthroi universe? Hm… he doesn’t covet fame in any way, so I can’t imagine it’d be because of anything he himself has willed. Maybe someone snaps a photo of him and posts it online and it blows up? I don’t know… he doesn’t even have any social media himself, so… yeah. I got nothing.
86. What would someone assume about your oc based on their appearance? Would those assumptions be correct?
Matthias has been carefully crafted to look exactly as haughty and duplicitous as he is.
87. What are some of your oc’s physical weak spots? What about emotional/moral ones?
He’s weak to being kissed behind his ears, touched along his spine, and having his head pet or his hair pulled. He’s weak to Theo and Imani… and there’s this small, trembling thing inside him that’s weak to his mother.
88. Does your oc hold grudges? For how long? Does your oc have any rivals?
Hm… I have a hard time imagining him carrying anger with him long enough to foster a grudge (outside of the grudges he has with his mother and the people at the reformation school he went to). I think if he had an issue with someone he’d do something about it rather than stew in it. And by “do something about it” I don’t mean by talking things out.
89. What does your oc’s laugh sound like? How often do they laugh? Are they easily amused?
Sexy. What? Who said that? 
No, but Matthias doesn’t genuinely laugh very often. Instead he has this rehearsed laugh that he uses to charm and manipulate in social settings. It sounds nice… breezy and light… a trustworthy kind of laugh.
His real laugh is actually pretty startling. Matthias’s voice is cold and seductive… dripping… but his laughter, when it’s honest and real, is rumbling and comes out at a much lower register. He laughs with his entire diaphragm. You can press your hand to the center of his chest and feel it rumble through your fingers. Theo actually jumped the first time he heard Matthias laugh. Matthias’s laugh is inviting and warm and always makes Theo all flustered. Even if you're immune to Matthias's looks and charm, his real laugh will draw you in.
90. Does your oc have any objects they could never give up? Why is it so important to them? Do they have any family heirlooms?
Matthias doesn’t form attachments to material objects and has nothing he holds on to. He also sees zero value in family heirlooms and his lineage as a whole. I suppose he does still have his family home (and other Evanoff homes) in his possession but he defiles it regularly.
91. What is your oc’s typical posture like? Do they slouch, or stand straight? How much space do they usually take up, both physically and figuratively?
Matthias (like Imani) was forced through years of etiquette lessons and has a very precise bearing with an easy upright posture, standing tall and elegant in the center of any room. He’s both physically large (he’s 6’3” and would potentially have been taller had it not been for his experiences at the reformation school while still growing) as well as figuratively; Matthias has a very… imposing presence and is at ease with himself no matter where he is.
92. What trait does your oc appreciate or admire the most in others? Why?
I believe it’s a three-way tie between intelligence, wit, and viciousness. Matthias doesn’t want to be bored by conversation and he seeks out stimulation and amusement to prevent that.
93. What is your oc’s preferred learning style? Observation, hands-on, instruction? Do they take notes or memorize?
He prefers to learn by himself through reading and observation. Obviously, though, there are some things he can't learn through simple observation and does actually seek those who're better educated to learn from—like his personal trainer and language tutors. He has a very good memory, but he takes notes regardless. He likes the activeness of pen and paper while learning.
94. Does your oc rely more on a logical or emotional mindset? What situations would this be the opposite?
Logical, definitely. Matthias experienced very little emotional output for most of his life and it was only once he truly bonded with Imani that he started to develop more sentimental feelings. When it comes to Theo, however, he becomes almost entirely ruled by emotion… nearly too much of it for him to bear.
95. How is your oc about keeping someone else’s secret? Are they the gossiping type, or do they hold true on their promise to keep things quiet?
He keeps secrets very well. It’s not that he feels especially beholden to keeping his word, but rather that he enjoys knowing that he’s the keeper of a hidden kind of knowledge. That said, when the secrets he’s keeping are on Imani and Theo’s behalf, it becomes much more about a sense of loyalty and love than about… mastery and power, I suppose.
96. Describe your oc in three words. What three words would they use to describe themselves?
I would describe Matthias best as a man who is intimidating, imposing, and impossible.
Matthias would describe himself as detestable, irresistible, and… a mouthful.
97. How old is your oc physically? How old are they in mental maturity? When are they most mature, and when are they the least?
Matthias is in his mid-twenties physically (I think 26-27 is a more solid answer, but nothing’s set in stone). Mentally… it’s complicated. When he was young he had a sort of agelessness about him… it was only when he first entered his teens (and the public) that I believe he began to act more like a real child and then more rapidly like a teenager. Abuse did a number on him, though, late in his teens… He’s both stuck at the ages he was during the worst of the abuse while also seeming older than he actually is. His maturity is best exemplified in crisis situations or when he’s taking care of someone (Theo…). Conversely, his maturity goes down the drain when he’s being stingy or possessive.
98. Is your oc the type to have a lot of fairly good friends, have a small group of close friends, have one or two best friends, or have no friends at all? Who are they closest to?
Matthias only has one best friend and that’s Imani, who is also the first friend he ever made (they've been friends since they were eleven and twelve, respectively). He’s also friends with Sehyuk but they aren’t particularly close. His relationship with Sehyuk is... one of convenience, I'd say, but they do have an interesting bond... Matthias is able to fully be himself around Sehyuk, which is rare for him.
99. What is your oc’s morning routine usually like? What do they eat for breakfast (if they have breakfast)? What time do they usually get up in the morning?
Matthias is an insomniac so most mornings he’s not actually waking up but rather was already there waiting for the sun to rise. Matthias will sit outside with coffee and a book in the morning and listen to the birds. If he’s having breakfast it’s most likely something light that compliments his coffee.
100. Does your character ever swear? How often? How vulgar is their swearing?
In casual conversation I’d say he doesn’t often swear since he’s more imaginative than just saying “fuck you” or similar phrases, but if he does swear in conversation he’s most likely doing it in Polish (pierdol się is easily what he says most). When he’s in someone’s ear talking dirty, however, he’s vulgar to the point of pearl clutching on his partner’s part.
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timegears-moved · 11 months
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tbh i gotta take back what i said before. totk hasn't really done anything to make me care about this version of zel*nk
#bwark#don't get me wrong it's still a fine ship but i think this is just a case of me preferring their friendship#and also it's more of a criticism of this incarnation of link than a criticism of the game itself#he's just too. static. i don't like that he shows more emotion at cooking than at the actual tragedy of the plot#and i know that it's stated that he has anxiety from the pressure of the calamity but like i said he's still capable of showing emotion#but like at the wrong times. it's cute that he's happy about food but where's the shock that he was asleep for 100 years and everyone he#once loved is dead and he doesn't even have memories of them before seeking them out#or that his best friend had to suffer a millenia as a dragon for the sake of everyone#compare this to like. idk tp link's horror when ganondorf holds up midna's fused shadow and crushes it with his hand#and his relief at the end that not only is she back to her true form but is still the same mischevious midna he's known the whole game#or sksw link's pure anger at ghirahim for kidnapping zelda near the end#or ww link's visible guilt and heartbreak at having to leave his grandma behind and alone to go and save his sister#not trying to be mean because i still like him. he is still link after all. but idk he just falls a bit short for me#like his promise to mipha's father comes across as very shallow when he kept a blank face at her in both the memory and her spirit scene#the only character that benefits from him being flat is revali and that's because it fuels revali's dislike of him because of a#misunderstanding and lack of communication#totk spoilers#<- in the tags at least
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sysig · 9 months
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Oh getting very close now, villainy feels right around the corner (Patreon)
#Doodles#Villainsona#Just Desserts#So you can see - the TVAU floodgates lol#Upon realizing how fun and easy Charm is to draw in the WOY style I was like ''So designing outfits then''#It's like an inbuilt base maker! This style is perfect for just getting a scribble down and then extrapolating from there!#Surely we've all seen the phenomenon of starting with something simple and expanding and building once the base is established#Like kid drawings being redrawn by professionals :D Or pixel art into fully rendered or Minecraft skins open to interpretation#The urge to Artistic Liberty lol - I just managed to find a style that I can do both in >:3c Create the initial and build from there! Yay!!#Love having that as an option ♪ And like I said she's criminally fun to draw like this lol she's just a cute rectangle#Plus - and this is really the big plus lol - since WOY is so silhouette-based it's a great style to test outfits on#The biggest problem for designing her TVAU outfit for me has been how readable it is with and without the wings#Classic Charm is perfect and that's reflected in her design as well ♪ TVAU is in the image of another hm hm hm#<Already a tag lol - but she is! Classic Charm has the perfect amounts of breaks and rests and interest and design flow I just hhh <3 <3#And also true for the TVAU! Charm is under pretty direct influence by that point and I want that to be very reflected in her outfit!#I had a bunch of themes I wanted to explore like two months ago but kept coming up empty :P But now that I've had a chanced to simmer :3c#The biggest elements I'm happiest with are her belly showing in the first one - one of the themes was ''forced vulnerability'' so#I'm not sure what to do with the hem of her pants tho I very intentionally didn't design where her shirt and pants meet in Classic lol#The second design is probably my favourite overall :D And not Just because she turned out so cute in the WOY style haha#I mean she also turned out very cute in the JD style hehe - but I kinda forgot that Kaiein started as a dragon!#Turning her spiderweb theme into dragon scales is so just- how did I not think of that before gods what a brilliant idea lol#And I can keep scalloping! Scallops forever dragon scales spider webs sugar candy sweets ♪ My favourite :D#I like that it keeps the shawl as well while still having very uncovered shoulders - feels villainy and still reflective of her design :D#The last one is more building off the previous two - chest window for the vulnerability theme - dragon scale ''train'' like the first's#I think it's decent but it was honestly more for the dark striped leggings since the middle had them light like her Classic design#One of the other themes I was going for was ''coloured over/blotted out'' and having it be ''her'' design while literally coloured out#I think there's something to that :3c#Also *toots own horn* I did a fantastic job reconstructing her leg in that last one >:3c#I bet you'd never know the the entire bottom half of her left leg had to be digitally added after the fact! I even did that with my trackpad#Hehehe ♪♫ Quite pleased :3c
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bitches hate me 'cause im in my no fucks given era, and I'm like, 'stay mad darling'
#ice speaks#irl stuff#rant in the tags#moved into our new place a few weeks back#and had a big ass celebration after blessing the house#when an old family friend who used to babysit me told me that I've grown very big#and thats true#since we haven't seen each other since I was 10 (am 18 now)#but then my aunt just had to go and remark on my weight#keep in mind im a plus sized person and I was wearing a dress that day#and i said 'well as long as I'm healthy and happy who cares' without missing a beat#which shocked everyone because im not usually the confrontational type#i.e i just keep my mouth shut cause i genuinely don't see a reason to grace their taunts with a response#and im respectful to my elders usually#but i said it while smiling and putting on such an innocent face#that she had to agree with me and apologize in front of the 20+ people who were in the room#since she basically insulted one of the stars of the evening#she kept glaring at me after that#like maam look after your dumpster fire of a family before trying to talk shit about ME to MY FACE#you don't know that i remember what you talk about around me thinking I'm not paying attention or I wont understand what you're talking abo#also love how people think that out of everyone in my family I'm the most gullible and easily influenced#just because i dont react to what comes out of your mouth doesn't mean I am not paying attention#i may be quiet but that just means I'm more observant#on a much happier note i got a lot of compliments for my outfit and my hair#and i have a designated writing and reading spot which is making me more efficient and slowly curing my writers block
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while it’s true that “3” was an objectively weak x-files episode, and I didn't love it, I do appreciate getting to see just how dark of a place Mulder has fallen into in Scully’s absence. she’s been gone for months, and he's so purposeless and, frankly, desperate. but especially meaningful is that he's wearing her necklace. the man will start an x-file with her name on it, tuck her badge and her glasses away in a cabinet for safekeeping, but the necklace? it's staying with him.
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dirt-str1der · 1 year
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Kazu/maji is soooooo different than sae/maji this is because saejima and majima are best friends who go together everywhere and frequently close the toilet door in each others faces because they keep trying to follow each other inside and the other guys like No. im going to take a shit and kiryu and majima are like guys who are knotting each other every time they meet and conjoined at the groin , like majima will carry kiryus baby and saejima will raise it with him you know what i mean theres a lack of commitment (but no shortage of passion) with majima and kiryu theyre each others one night stand every single night but saejima and him stick with each other through thick and thin come hell or high water
#Yakuza loveblog#i just realised with horror that whenever i say kazu/maji without censoring it like that it actually appears in the tag itself#so thats why i have a typing quirk now#anyway you guys get what i mean#im not saying kiryu and majima dont love each other im just saying they dont love each other like saejima and majima do#kiryu is gentle and kind but he cant be loyal when nobody has ever sucessfully pinned him down before#saejima ... he is faithful. at the end of the day he will always come back to majima#and its the same for majima. saejima Gets him like no one else does ... they love each other the same way#i always say this but majima starting to wear his eyepatch less around saejima makes me explode fire and brimstone because he was hiding#damn near everything about himself his past his injuries and trauma because those arent for anybody but saejima. and saejima forgiving him#actively liberated him from those shackles. he waited for him every day and kept his head high until the day he could lower it to saejima ..#he bared himself to him then. showed him the life he was owed because saejima owned him then and had every right to strike him down where he#stood. nobody else was supposed to see his wounds because it was For saejima to judge if majima had been punished enough had suffered enough#for his sake .. the payment for his betrayal .. and saejima of course he forgave him. thats his bro ... the person he looks up to the most#so he forgives majima and majima is free to be his own person again not bound by honour or repayment. and he chose 2 remain by saejimas side#till death do them part or something like that#... the body text of this post implies that majima is an alpha. hes not jsyk hes literally omega coded ‘but hes so violent’ yeah.#hes meant to be like that.#saejima is levelheaded unlike kiryu so hes beta coded and he and majima fuck like rabbits#this is all FYI btw things i believe to be true backed up by source material
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zippers · 7 months
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kinda been spiraling over the lori vallow case. she/her family remind me a lot of my mom's adoptive family. (down to cheating with religious leaders!) thankfully we did not have the mormon element to justify killing as my adoptive grandma has only ever claimed she has killed to get back at people, police were able to rescue the hostages alive. and WE are the estranged ones... everyone else is on my grandma's side (the other people involved in the hostage situation have since gone back to her—ie it was triggered by my mom trying to help my aunt (bio daughter of this woman) move across the country away from this woman and she has since moved back to live in one of her dozen hoarder houses.) and they accuse my mom of being abusive/manipulative/etc which is such a joke.
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just-a-mod · 2 years
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well it finally happened, i started working on recoloring 8)
ive gotten it to a certain point where im sorta pleased with the logic, though there are still some genetic anomallies that are bugging me, but genetics don’t always work the way they are ‘supposed’ to either, so i can ignore it
info under the cut uwu
i ended up figuring that Borres (for intents and purposes inD&D and Crossroads) is a mixed baby of Fey lineage and Kalashtar, from his mother and father respectively
Fey being what they are tend to have a very ‘bright’ or ‘dazzling’ form, in which is what Borres can turn on and off
and Kalashtar are known for having a ‘shadowy’ or ‘shimmering’ form that lingers around them when they channel it, thus the shadow form
it fits fairly well, i was surprised by that xD im use to stretching for my headcanons
any who, i’ve got them to a nice point, and i have a rough idea of what Zinnia’s father looked like to cause her to be the bright summer child that she looks like
and while i have the concepts of Caspian and Griggory’s parents, i doubt i’ll ever draw or design them, they are old money pieces of shit that i dont care for
Eternia does confuse me quite a bit, but i honestly think she can choose to look how ever she wants, so...this is just how she decides to manifest as
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jacksintention · 1 year
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I can't with the previous post. It's just so good applied to Levi, Lacie, Oswald and even Jack.
Levi has his hands tied by the Baskerville system that is a sort of scam by the Jurors‚ like every Glen. But he says "let's just create a change" and gives a will to the Core. And he does so with the full intention of changing the narrative, if just to avoid the boredom of spending eternity watching the same thing happen over and over again from a sit in someone else's mind.
Lacie goes along with it because of her desire to ease the Core's loneliness, but in her idea of the children of misfortune being a consequence of this loneliness and her feelings of doubt or reservations, perhaps, revealed even before the tree scene in the scene in which she talks about this with Oswald, we could interpret this as her desire to end the existence of the children of misfortune and thus the cycle.
Jack plays into this in his attempt to take the "real" world to the "Abyss" world, but when he most consciously twists the narrative the Jurors had settled was when he intently made the decision to take the power from the Baskervilles. And I do think it has to do with ending the very system that doomed Lacie and Oswald and he deemed cruel and like torture, but mainly it is so that no one would interfere with him in the future.
Oswald tries to destroy the new narrative Jack has or is creating first by trying to stop him, but later on by trying to stop Levi's schemes before everything happened, resettling the narrative he was controlled and doomed by, serving still as their tool. And then he literally faces the truth, in the most explicitly way no one ever has been told this in that "real" world before, and threatens to kill the instigators of that narrative. And then just renounces, in a lack of action that is him at his most active ("not with a bang but a whimper", how fitting is that?!!!).
Ultimately there is a middle ground but the narrative is changed for good. For better or worse. With uncertain future consequences. But it is changed, and it feels kinder. And as a thank you the source of every narrative, the ink and paper of the narrative, lulls someone who shouldn't have existed but changed the world to sleep by telling him a different story. Because that's it. They're stories, and Oz deserved to go with a kinder one, because the ink and paper of the narrative loves him. And it's so interesting how that works metanarratively too. The author tells the story, but the author tells the reader a story about the stroy telling a softer version of the story, so that the reader too will get it alongside Oz. That works on several levels and it's so so interesting.
#I talk too much#I should probably delete this later#I was thinking a couple of days ago about how Lacie states that to Oswald in chapter 101 and how it seems to hint towards her choosing#to go through it not just in an attempt to ease the Core's loneliness but also trying to end the cycle if the children of misfortune really#originate from that. Ultimately it doesn't seem to work because even after Vincent there had kept existing new children. It could be argued#that perhaps it's due to the Will's own loneliness and isolation‚ or to the Core now being more sure about what loneliness is‚ or maybe#the author just didn't think of it further. Even after everything that happens the existence of the children of misfortune is necessary to#access the Core‚ that will now speak through Jack's body‚ Jack's mouth. So maybe Lacie's theory is true. And I like to think it is‚#but I'm biased bc I like how it works narratively and I love the concept of the children of misfortune being like emanences of the Core#and the parallelisms drawn from it. Like with Jack. Lacie's attempt to ease the Core's loneliness + chance the cycle works so well with#Jack's own intention and methods but in a twisted way‚ which works so well with how he misinterpreted her desire in his will to keep living#The Core gaining a certain sense of personhood through Lacie works very well with Jack both gaining first and then losing it for the same#The Core having a vague feeling of loneliness that Lacie recognises and knowing to acknowledge it thanks to Lacie works well with Lacie#learning to do the same through Jack‚ and with both Jack and Lacie recognising that loneliness in each other and feeling some kind of#connection and understanding due to that‚ yet not knowing it in themselves until facing the other. How that dooms them both in some ways#And now it's the typical Core/Lacie/Jack parallelisms that get a thousand faces and mirages through the story#of which I always talk and that makes me end up talking about pretty much every character in the manga and Cantor's transfinite numbers#so I will shut up already. I've already talked a lot. And sorry for the post but I couldn't fit everything in the tags#and I don't want to lose the idea‚ I want to keep on thinking about it more thoroughly#Pardon also my denomination of the worlds. Understand the " in the nietzschean sense please#Also that goes to my future self if I forget but I think I'll understand what I mean with that#I'm myself after all‚ if slightly altered‚ and live inside myself#I think there was some other clarification I wanted to make and perhaps some correction but I can't recall right now#It doesn't matter much because this is a draft for future personal pondering‚#but I hope it's not too grave as to confuse my future thoughts or that at least I will catch it later on
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candydos · 1 year
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i am genuinely so unmedicated (babygirl)
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dreamcast-official · 1 year
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fuck it. fuck it. i dont care. i dont actually care
#vent in tags#im gonna add some filler tags bc this is the first time i think a vent in tags is actually. serious and might be upsetting. so. ur own risk#idk whens good enough. fuck it#its gonna be my abusers birthday in a few days.#and i heard that she mightve killed herself last year#i dont know. not like i fucking kept tabs on her. i didnt care.#but my friend who used to be a mutual friend with her said her last post on social media was very depressed. and in may of last year#and i know what type of person she is (was?)#she. might be fucking dead#and. i dont. know how to feel about that#on the one hand. i dont give a fuck anymore. she hasnt been something i think about since her last attempt to stalk me#on the other hand. idk. i guess she still has some power over me. because i feel like its my fault.#i heard from someone that everytime she posted on her whatsapp status it was about me and how *i* ruined her life#idk. i cant help but feel like. if she really is dead. it was all my fault. i know thats not true but. god it fucking feels like it#why do i still care. she fucking ruined my life why do i care if shes alive or not.#for a long time i said i wanted her to be dead. that i wished she wouldnt bother me anymkre#but now that thats an actual possibility. god i dont know what the fuck to do#and i cant talk about this with anyone because i never told anyone about what she did and i dont think i could#i guess she finally followed through with all those times she threatened to kill herself because of something i did.#to be honest. good fucking riddance. fuck you julia
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im-fuck3d-90 · 4 months
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my mother discouraged me from finding a new psychiatrist today because she tried 4 months ago and found my current one...
#vent in tags#my current one also kept mixing up which medications go to which pharmacy#even though it's “All except this specific one go to this pharmacy”#she kept thinking half went to one and the other half went to another#she also got the address wrong for one of them#I've said at least 10 times during our 3 separate meetings that Only One goes here bc of insurance; ALL the rest go here#I'm there for med management and this doesn't inspire hope#I told her 5 times in less than 2 minutes which one goes to the odd pharmacy#which she wrote down wrong and had to scribble out on an irl piece of paper#I was repeating the same sentence#“Only the (med) goes to (pharmacy); all the others go to (main pharmacy)”#"Only the (med) goes to (pharmacy)#“ONLY the (MED) goes to (pharmacy)”#ffs she needs to learn to listen#she also nearly yelled at me for being upset that my scheduled meeting was changed literally last minute#she also questioned why I; a trans person; would leave Fl because; “Well DeS*ntes won't be in office forever.”#I had to actually tell her that someone WORSE could come along and she said; “Okay true; we don't know the future.”#As if the now isn't bad enough#I shouldn't have to get beaten in the streets for her to understand that I could get hurt#I don't WANT to get beaten in the streets; SO I'M LEAVING#Privilege is TRUELY multilayered#Cis privilege is ABSOLUTELY A THING#She doesn't have to worry about her life-saving medication being declared illegal by a few votes#frfr if I couldn't stay on T; I'd be falling off the top of a bridge#I'd just need to think about skydiving and then... gone... nothing...#I wouldn't exist anymore#my pain would be over#tw parent mention
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sttoru · 3 months
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.⌇ 𝐒𝐘𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐒𝐈𝐒. it’s late at night and you try to cuddle with sukuna. keyword; try.
wc. 1.2k
tags. true form!sukuna x female reader. fluff, angst (+comfort). heian era. size difference (readers referred to as small). sukuna’s a bit mean, but he also has a soft spot for you. miscommunication ? it gets solved. reader gets called ‘woman, doll’.
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“what are you trying to do?” sukuna sighs. you’re up to something again, he figures. his red eyes follow your body as it crawls up to him on the bed.
you’re both tired after a long day of fulfilling some duties here and there around the estate. all you need is a big beefy man wrapping his arms around you to keep you warm and safe.
the perfect man for that is sukuna. those four arms of his wrapped around your small body feel like heaven.
“it’s called cuddling,” you retort. the sarcastic tone you used triggers a deep sigh from the sorcerer. sukuna holds back the urge to say something sarcastic as well.
he doesn’t utter a single word once you snuggle up to his chest. you’ve taught him how to cuddle during the first time you asked him to hold you. sukuna was awkward with showing any type of affection back then.
. . he still very much is.
“hug, please,” you remind him. the cold-hearted man scoffs, though listens to your polite request. all four of his arms imprison you against his chest, your small body nearly disappearing behind his limbs.
that’s what you like most about those cuddles you share together; how you fit so perfectly in his strong arms. it’s much more comforting than you thought it would be.
a pair of hands rests on your waist, the other pair on your hips. sukuna glances down at you and immediately notices that smile on your lips. even after all this time, he still cannot fathom why you’re so carefree around a monster like him.
and that inability to understand you and your love for him is accompanied by an urge to push you away.
“you got your hug, now get up,” sukuna interrupts the silence. his voice is cold and devoid of emotion—he uses that voice when he talks to other people. not with you, “i have better things to attend to.”
thus, it hurts. when he talks to you like that. like you’re not the person he secretly cherishes most. though, you remind yourself of sukuna’s own words. the ones you heard him say a while ago.
‘love is meaningless’, he said. you remember. and yet you kept hoping that he’d change his mind about that statement. you hoped and eventually saw exactly that: your presence and your affectionate gestures mellowed his heart of steel.
but all that effort seems to go down the drain every time sukuna pushes you away.
you know it’s because he’s unfamiliar with the feelings of love. he may not say it nor show it, but you know that sukuna’s afraid of hurting you. so, he creates a gap between you two every now and then.
you know and yet you’re patient.
“oh, ‘kay,” you nod in understanding. you pull away from his embrace and get up from the bed. your bottom lip trembles.
sukuna is not gullible. he’s anything but oblivious. especially if it’s about how you feel and act. he notices every single change in your mood; whether you mask it or not.
you walk to the sliding doors—ready to open them and step out into the hallway. your eyes are a bit watery, but you quickly blink the tears away and take a deep breath in. you reach for the door.
“come back here, woman.”
sukuna’s booming voice makes you stop. you glance at his form over your shoulder. he’s leaning against the headboard of the bed, arms crossed and eyebrows furrowed.
is he. . . upset?
“why? you said you had better things to attend to.” you answer with a shrug. you try your best to not make it seem like his earlier words had effected you. you turn your head towards the word with a huff, “go on, then.”
sukuna narrows his eyes. he sucks at communicating what he actually desires—what he actually wants. right now that want is for you to stay. even though that completely contradicts his previous words.
the sorcerer doesn’t know what to do. when you’re with him, he pushes you away out of guilt. when you’re away, he wants you back with him.
love is complicated.
“you. . .” sukuna grunts in frustration. all those feelings for you inside of his heart are playing with his rational thoughts. he doesn’t like seeing you upset. he wants the usual you back, “tsk. fine then.”
silence, followed by the creaking of the bed frame. seems like sukuna’s getting up to do whatever ‘business’ he needed to attend. at least, that’s what you thought.
you slide the door open and set a foot outside of the chambers. before the other could follow, you’re suddenly lifted up in the air by a strong pair of hands. your vision turns upside down as your body is effortlessly hoisted onto a shoulder.
“woah!” you gasp and feel the blood go to your head. your eyes are fixed on the back of your lover. you kick your legs in protest, but only get a smack to your ass in response. you whine at that, “put me down!”
“watch it, doll,” sukuna hisses at your fierce demand, a warning to fix your tone. he puts you back down on the soft mattress. he’s surprisingly gentle when he settles you in place—not throwing you on the bed or anything similar, “should’ve listened when i told you the first time.”
your eyes meet sukuna’s and you notice how much they’ve softened. that alone makes the lump in your throat disappear. your love for him isn’t one sided—you’ve always kept that in the back of your mind—yet your thoughts made you overlook the little things he does for you.
his actions speak louder than his words. that’s the kind of man he is.
sukuna’s trying to open up more, though that process is slow. you’re fine with that.
especially when there’s that faint pout on his lips as he stares at you. his eyebrows are still furrowed, his crimson eyes sharp yet warm.
“oh, you want me back in bed this bad?” you tease once you get the opportunity. the man in front of you clicks his tongue and grabs your cheeks with one hand, turning your head up to face him.
sukuna’s eyes are focused on yours. the eye contact is intimidating, but you’re hypnotised. you physically can’t look away. he leans in and bites your lip with his sharp canines, “shut up.”
that raspy whisper alone confirms your assumption. you giggle at his attempt of refuting your point. you’re used to all those intimidating words and actions he pulls to get you to stop your teasing.
those empty threats—it’s becoming rather cute with how hard he tries to deny everything. he fails nearly every time, however.
“come,” sukuna lays back against the pillows after placing a quick and sloppy kiss against your lips. he pulls your body against his and presses your head against his chest, right where his heart is beating, “continue with your.. ‘cuddling’ thing.”
he put your ear right above his heart, because he remembers listening to his heartbeat calms you down. you told him that a while back. sukuna doesn’t understand why you like it, but his fingers massage your scalp either way.
that’s also something that brings you comfort.
you’re surprised by how much he knows about you, but appreciate it anyway. he remembers both the big and small things about you. ‘that’s how he probably shows his love,’ you conclude silently.
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magnusbae · 10 months
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To illustrate this post by @mayahawkse I would like to visualize to you the difference:
A post in 2023:
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A post in 2014:
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A zoom out of the same post:
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This is what a community looks like.
See how in 2023 almost all of the reblogs come from the OP, from their few hours/days in the tag search. Meanwhile in 2014 the % of reblogs from OP is insignificant, because most of the reblogs come from the reblogs within the fandom, within the micro-communities formed there. You didn't need to rely on tags, or search, or being featured. Because the community took care of you, made sure to pass the work between themselves and onto their blog and exposed their followers to it. It kept works alive for years.
It's not JUST the reblog/like ratio that causing this issue, it's the type of interaction people have. They're content with scrolling and liking the search engine, instead of actually having a reblogging relationship with other blogs in their community.
Anyways, if you want to see more content you like, the only true way to make it happen is to reblog it. Likes do not forward content in no way but making OP feel nice. Reblogs on the other hand make content eternal. They make it relevant, they make it exist outside of a fickle tumblr search that hardly works on the best of days.
If you want more of something, reblog it.
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tyrannuspitch · 5 months
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you know that tiktok reciting all those ironic/cutesy misogynistic memes back to back. that's me slowly turning evil re: "everything is about sex". "yearning means horny" "touch-starved means horny" "everyone is a little bit in love with their friends" "all fear is erotic" "all disgust is erotic" "all hatred is erotic" "all physical touch upwards of a fist bump is erotic" "everything longer than it is wide is phallic and every emotion on the planet is just a cover for desire" okay. what if i killed you with hammers
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