#kids are so much easier to socialise with tbh

[philosophicalmisuse]

Victor from From and Autistic Coding in media

Just finished season 1 and a couple eps into season 2, enjoying it lots so far! Only spoilers for season 1 I think, maybe mild for season 2

Just seen a couple of people discuss Victor and Autism and neurodivergence in general and wanted to add my two cents

I reckon he's autistic-coded (and I think the distinction between is autistic and is autistic coded is important) -

- trouble socialising (esp with other adults, but having an easier time with kids - socialising well with people below and above ur peer group is fairly common)

- restricted interests (the peaches being the one thing he liked to eat jumped out to me - thought it was so sweet how donna made sure that he had some and that she was rationing them for him specifically, both so others wouldn't have them and so that he could have them regularly for as long as possible and genuinely took seriously how important it was and attempted to hold back other supplies in case they ran out to provide an alternative but was aware it likely wouldn't work - she looked at why he liked the peaches and accommodated his needs not just in terms of well this will keep him happy but in a caring way for him as a person, such a little thing but damn made me like donna so much)

- the visual language of how he's presented - wearing his (casual flannel) shirt buttoned all the way up to the neck and pants cuffed, just like how he did as a kid, holding onto an object from his childhood, posture that is overly "correct", slightly shambley walk, 'evasive' body language that avoids eye contact etc - ! important to specify here that I'm not saying all autistic people dress or move like this, I for one hate things touching my neck so you wouldn't catch me dead in a button up all the way to my neck, but this visual language/costuming/physicality is super common for male autistic-coded characters as a visual shorthand to express restrive patterns of behaviour/outsider from social norms of dress, so it jumped out at me right away. Two other examples that spring to mind are young Sheldon and elementary Sherlock Holmes

- the language/tonality he uses - often repetitive to express the rules while not always explaining why (example being when jade takes his violin and ransacks his room, he doesn't explain why jade shouldn't go into his room or how it made him feel, he visually shows distress and repeats the rule that jade violated, even when jade explains his pov - victor responds in his face to the comment I thought you were dead, seemingly understanding that that's reasonable, but it's not relevant to the rule as he isn't dead so he repeats the rule) - he's often fairly monotone/expressionless as well - I don't know how to explain this but some of his inflections/patterns of speech are very familiar to me in terms of how I and other autistic people I've met talk. There's something about how and where the voice goes up and down in a sentence that I can't really explain

- disliking change (eg. peaches)

And I'm sure there's more but these are the main ones I remember

NOW!!! onto my broader points

I have seen some people online argue that:

he's not autistic he's just traumatised

This is rational and I get it! He's presumably been alone since a very young age so not 'socialised', he's had to learn the rules of this place and stick to them or die and so on. The behaviours of cPTSD and asd have a large amount of overlap.

However, my first point would be that a traumatised autistic person (which is most autistic people tbh) look/act different from traumatised non-autistic people. Most autistic people that you meet are traumatised, and there's a lot of traumatised people who aren't autistic. Having cPTSD and having a trigger to a specific sound, for example, is different from having SPD and getting tired/stressed/having a meltdown from most sounds being too loud and your nervous system being unable to distinguish between a relevant loud noise and an irrelevant loud noise and giving you all noises at the same level and stimulating your nervous system to react to them the same, for example. In cPTSD your nervous system is likely also inflating lots of noises, because lots of noises were relevant to your survival in a traumatic environment - but in SPD (something many ASD people have and some argue may be a major facet of the disorder that has, until recently, been unhelpfully diminished in diagnostic resources) this would happen whether or not you were traumatised.

The collection of traits in the DSM is descriptive of a way of processing the world around you - and when people argue that Victor is autistic, they're saying that he is behaving in a way that appears to be characteristic of a certain combination of traits. Additionally, he was old enough to experience some socialisation, and had enough resources to experiment with other ways of dressing - there presumably have been other people that have come to the village over the years, as well. What I see in the character is a very traumatised autistic adult using patterns of behaviour that are explicitly autistic in order to survive in a terrible situation, HOWEVER I would argue that it doesn't matter very much

Regardless of whether he is or is not autistic (he's a fictional character and we can never have enough info to really know unless the characters or creators of the show explicitly say it, ofc) what is relevant in my opinion is that he is CODED to be autistic.

The way the character is presented is similar to a lot of tropes in media about how autistic characters are presented. Whether you think that the character in and of himself is or is not autistic, I think it's fair to say that the way he is characterised is similar to a lot of other male autisic-coded characters in media

WHY IS THIS IMPORTANT?

It's important both in terms of how we analyse/interpret the specific media, and how this can impact social understanding of autism more broadly

First of all, it may tell us something about how Autism is portrayed in media. An autistic character in another piece of media who has not experienced the same levels of insane trauma in a horror setting is thought to behave similarly to a character who has experienced these things.

Secondly, it tells us about how the other characters in the world relate to Victor. Why do they instantly see him as being weird, when initially the only thing he does is simply have a conversation with a new resident? He's instantly seen as a threat by the dad, explicitly seen as weird by everyone else, where the young girl who murdered someone is seen as someone safe, and positive for taking care of the child and distracting them from the horrible new situation they find themselves in.

Honestly, he's initially presented as a sexual threat to both children - I've seen some ppl online refer to him as 'paedophilic'. Why is this?

I would argue it's because autistic traits, down to the way autistic people move and speak, are seen as inherently threatening and other. I don't even blame the people who do read him as predatory, as it's so common in media to be presented with people who look/behave like Victor ending up being creepy and weird. Autistic people are infantilised, seen engaging with children, and the audience is told they're weird - even the dad was so strongly hostile to Victor harmlessly talking to his child BEFORE he took him into the forest (something that I completely agree any parent would be reasonable for responding to extremely hostily). It was clear this was something Victor was used too as well.

This is a common trope. A weird, socially inept older person forms an unlikely friendship with an open-minded child - who is often discouraged from being friendly with this person, as they are viewed as sinister and a threat from adults in their life. This is used as a double-bluff - the real threat to the child is actually the young woman who the adults are fine with spending time with their child, as they view her as fundamentally non-threatening.

This enabled me, as a viewer, early on, to discount the information that was alluding to Victor being a threat - but its also a really frustrating trope, because it relies on the fact that audiences do see autistic patterns of behaviour/speech/movement as fundamentally other/threatening. Even if you subvert this trope by making the threat come from somewhere else, and tell the audience that really they're bad/foolish/wrong for thinking Victor was a threat, you're still using the same tropes that make real autistic people be viewed with suspicion simply for existing in the world. Victor is still portrayed as creepy, and still has to earn the protagonists trust in a way other characters don't. He, and other autistic coded characters, still start off in a deficit, at a negative, where other characters start off with a neutral or positive. This really does impact real life people as well!

Another trope that is used that is relevant is the 'weird' character having a special amount of knowledge about the problem at hand that other characters discount because of their weirdness (knowledge often initially only shared with an open-minded child character). This is so frustrating! I even remember this coming up in The Dressmaker, when the intellectually disabled character (I think? It was one of those very generalist disabled character presentations, to my knowledge) witnessed the crime but no-one thought to ask them who did it till the end, and initially presumed he had done it or something (I still enjoyed the movie tho). Its bizarre to me that none's asking Victor what he knows - he even expresses early on to the kid that noone listens to him or cares, from memory. I find this so frustrating, and is again really common - and is also a part of the othering of autistic coded characters - they're 'not of this world', but are part of both and none at the same time.

While this is something that many autistic people feel and experience, it's partially because we're ostracised from our peers because we're so 'weird', so it's really frustrating to see this replicated time and time again in fantasy, horror and thriller genres especially - it sort of reenforces a social standard that's causing the problem. Rather than create understanding and support the elimination of notions of 'weirdness', even if the character is important and initially creepy but not a threat, they're still not of this world. It's still reasonable to see them as weird, because they are weird. The characters are rational for responding to the autistic coded character as if there's something off, because there is - even if they're ultimately on the same side.

This also has real-world impacts. People discount likely threats in favour of fear of unfamiliar behaviour. For example, the whole predatory thing - autistic people are more likely to be victims of predatory behaviour, not perpetrators of it (for example, autistic women are 3x more likely to have been sexually assaulted than non-autistic women). However, there's these stereotypes in media where an autistic character is so weird that they're viewed as threatening - and, in some crime genre tropes, for example, the threat is confirmed. Even though most predators are stand up members of the community (compensating for their misdeeds via good acts) and people are surprised that they were perpetrators of horrific crimes - crime is often so horribly mundane - the media focuses on portrayals of mentally ill loners, utilising coding that is similar and sometimes the same as the coding of autistic characters. Not saying that no autistic person comments a crime of course, they demonstrably do, but utilising a media shorthand for violent/predatory criminals that is also used for autistic characters - as it is much more conforting for audiences to feel as if they would be able to tell from someone's weird behaviour if they're likely to be a threat - can have some really troubling real world consequences. Also not saying that no autistic coded character can possibly be portrayed as a villain - I really enjoyed Zac's plotline in Bones for example, especially the relationship that the two characters had - but it's the focus on these 'weird, socially inept' villians, over the far more common absolutely totally 'normal' person/family member/ local upstanding citizen that makes people disproportionately fear/stigmatise autistic ways of being

Then, other shows play off of this coding to 'subvert' it, reenforcing the connection along the way

All this being said, I really like Victor, I loved his relationship with Donna, and I'm really enjoying the show more broadly. However, I could defs see a lot of the narrative of s1 coming because of the shows use of autistic coded behaviours for Victor

I found it interesting that some fan theories have actually centred Victor's neurodivergence, and suggested that other characters are also neurodivergent and that might be why some of them are here/chosen - I find that interesting, especially because of the use of 'psychosis' in the show being a conduit for seemingly real voices of people who have passed away there

It will be interesting to see where they take it, and I'm excited to see what else happens in season 2 and even more excited for season 3 - but yeah, Victor is defs autistic coded, and some of those tropes do have negative knock-on consequences. Defs something that will impact my enjoyment of the show, depending on where they take it! It could be awesome and exciting and could be devastating or eye rolling etc but still excited to watch

[x-authorship-x]

"I'll die on the hill that Anakin should have been punted into the creche for a few years"

Yes! I'm so glad you agree, I wish more fics had him interacting with his agemates and being in the creche would have been good for him I think. Perhaps I'm giving him too much credit, and I've only watched those movies once and base the rest of what I know on what I get from fanfics so I could be wrong, but my read of that meeting was that Qui-Gon had intended that? He said he'll train Anakin, but 1. he had a padawan still, and 2. Anakin was 9?? That seems super, super young to be a padawan. I always found it really weird in fics that he had wanted to take Anakin on so young, and then I watched the movie and ended up finding it really weird that the council and Obi-Wan just assumed Qui-Gon meant he'd start training Anakin right then and there and toss out Obi-Wan. Why would he, that makes no sense and he never said he'd take Anakin as a padawan right then like I thought he had from fics. It seemed more to me like it was a promise or vow type thing, like he'd train Anakin when the time came so they didn't have to worry about trying to find someone who would train an unorthodox padawan. And then everyone immediately thought the worst of him so he stupidly doubled down and did not make any attempt to correct their miscommunication. From what little I know about Qui-Gon and his relationship with Obi-Wan there seemed to be a good amount of miscommunication, so this made the most sense to me that he'd be stubborn and double down when arguing with the council rather than explaining what he meant. So when he died Obi-Wan had no idea what he meant and went with what he though Qui-Gon meant and insisted Anakin be placed with him right then and there. Nevermind that he was grieving and Anakin was super baby for a padawan, honestly I'm going to blame the council here for not stepping in and saying Anakin would go to the creche for a few years, then Obi-Wan could have him. Idk I'm not even a huge fan of Qui-Gon and honestly don't know much about him, but in this case this is what seemed most likely to me when I watched it.

Oh anon I totally agree

Tbh my mind went forwards and I was thinking more.... Anakin in the creche could've fixed a lot. Like... Anakin made his own (shit) decisions, I'm definitely not an Anakin-apologist, but I do think that no one is born a certain thing and that childhood has a big knock-on effect. Putting Anakin in the creche would make transitioning from life as a slave easier, for one??? Like let's not immediately call someone else 'master' and let's socialise the kid and let's get an actual childcare specialist - not a traumatized grieving ex-padawan-turned-Knight oh my God everyone needs therapy good intentions don't automatically guarantee good outcomes - involved.

I'm not saying Kelleran Beq looks like the kinda man to rehab hurt children on the daily basis but that's exactly what I'm saying. God I love that man and his Grogu chase scene. Is Grogu in the creche yet or am I too early??? Who cares, I think Grogu would be so good for Anakin because can you imagine being the so called Chosen One but shown up by a baby. You can't fight a baby, not even Anakin (not yet rip) so you gotta just take the ego trimming and cope.

Get Anakin to learn to read and write and acclimatize, let Obi-Wan have time to establish himself as an individual, let everyone take a chill pill, and maybe the whole cast will feel better in three or four years 🙃 also this helps solve Anakin's INTENSE only child energy because Chosen One shit doesn't mean crap in the creche, being a freed slave probably isn't uncommon when you look at how a lot of force sensitive kids end up at the temple (every Jedi comes with a built in troubling backstory as standard), Anakin has friends and peers to cut his teeth on and learn patience with and how to check boundaries with and you just KNOW that those creche kids have so many lessons on Stranger Danger-!

qui-gon the future we couldve had if you choked out a few more words lmao

Also I like to imagine that anakin's first language is Huttese and he only knows enough Basic to understand customers and Watto etc so in my mind the council meeting SHOULDVE derailed when Anakin can't understand a word they're saying and the whole timeline careens towards 'lets get this freed child slave his vaccines and a primary school teacher before deciding the words of destiny, yes?'

Qui-Gon: *finally asks something not related to customer service, basic conversational vocab, or mechanics*

Anakin: ....uhhhhhhh

Qui-Gon, off camera: I was so lost in the euphoria of finding the Chosen One that I temporarily forgot I existed in a world with slavery and other languages haha-

Obi-Wan: *face down in a dune in the BG*

The end :)

[lucifer-is-a-bag-of-dicks]

I just went to dinner with family and was blindsided by several other guests that my mum failed to inform me were arriving so I just got slam dunked into a social situation I was not prepared for

but they were old family friends and thankfully one of them brought her kid along, I love this kid, he's adorable, he's maybe ten years old now and I've known him since he was a baby, I don't see him often but when I do I know it's gonna be a good night because now I don't have to stress about having normal adult conversations

I just gotta lend this kid a pen, watch him draw on some napkins for a bit, and then ask him what he's drawing

this kid will spend an entire evening giving me the complete rundown on some insanely creative magical creature that he made up all by himself

last time it was christmas lunch and he told me all about these evil hell dragons that all had different ways of torturing their victims' souls for all eternity, and the dragons had their own islands containing civilisations that also had complex political ties with each other that were all impacted by the dragons they had to deal with

tonight it was a fire based critter that started off really small but had several extremely creative evolved forms, some of which branched off depending on the creature's mental state when evolving, and should these creatures be lucky enough to reach their final forms, they can go from being ten times the size of the world's largest mountains, to becoming so large it destroys the planet its on, and then it becomes a new planet

why the fuck would I wanna talk with someone about them moving into their new house when I could talk about torture dragons and planet crushing fire beasts

[uno-writing]

platonic and romantic matchups! ive literally never done this b4 and i honestly dindon't know myself pretty well so forgive me😩 give me as many characters as u need!! I am a she/her and i am hetero

Appearance

5'4, black hair, rose-gold glasses, malaysian-chinese, im rather plain-looking tbh clothing and all. the body part I'm most confident about are my hands (slender, long fingers, vv sexy🥵)

Personality

To my family and strangers, I'm very quiet but my friends know me as the crazy crackhead of the group🤪. I'm pretty introverted as well, I'm TERRIBLE AT SOCIALISING (VERY IMPORTANT). Like, i depend on my already-existing friends to attract new friends to me idk how to do it on my own. I can be pretty awkward irl, but im much more friendly online, its easier for me to talk. Im always in my head, daydreaming and whatnot. I also swear a lot. Like, a LOT.

Likes

Im doing my alevels now (pre-u), taking Bio, chem and psychology. I LOVE BIO and psych is interesting, chem is on thin fucking ice wtf happened. I absolutely dESPISE maths tho. Absolutely hate it i dropped it after a week of itjdjdjjs. I also love listening to music, mostly kpop (nct, blackpink, mostly in general), but i like listening to pop artists too and a lil bit of NIKI and glass animals. I also really love animals, and i kidna want to be a marine biologist but idk🤠 because 🧚‍♀️🌠commitment🌠🧚‍♀️. Oh i also love webtoon, i started with i love yoo, lets play and lore olympus but now im reading unordinary, a deadbeats meal, hell is other people. I also like reading, my face series are percy jackson, heroes of olympus and trials of Apollo. When i was a child i loved diary of a wimpy kid, Geronimo Stilton and Enid blyton. I also like,,,,walking around and tossing a hairtie to think??? Like thinking about uno hcs and imagining myself as a kpop idol😩🤙🏻. Also food is good.

Dislikes

I hate sports. I mean i kinda like netball but that's it. Running is the absolute worse it fills me with so much dread. I dont particularly watch romance shows or movies, but i definetely own a lot of romance books jdjdjs. I also hate it when people clean and organise my room, i mean yeah its messy but i know where everything is and u just messed that up. Idk what else to put here hhhhh

Other stuff

I've never dated b4, so idk any love languages or how relationships even work. But i definetly have a type, they usually tend to be dark-haired, athletic or lean looking guys. But ofc this isn't always the casejdjdj.

When it comes to friends, I'm not picky. Whoever i can vibe with and as long as i don't mind their presence its fine. But my closest friends and people i want to be friends with tend to be just as chaotic as i am, some like kpop some don't. some are a bit more mature but some like to spend time gossiping. i like to float between these to freind groups however.

-radish🥬 anon

Also for matchups i wanna add that im a cancer and INFP. I would say these match me in a lot of aspects but im not as motherly or soft as people think cancers are. I also hate doing art lmao

IM SO SORRY BUT I also ALSO wanna add that in terms of academics, my grades range from good to yeah shes definitely good ay that. Im also a very nosy person, obviously i wont ask people for info i don't deserve to know but i can't help but wonder about info.

You don't have to include these extra infos if it's too troublesomendjdjhd

-radish🥬 anon

---

Heyyyy INFP buddies!!!

Also, you’re 1 inch taller than me and now I’m gonna hold a grudge against you /j I’m gonna make you a ‘least favorite anon’ award an it’s gonna be Zeke /j/j (lmao i platonically love you radish anon)🍿🥤🍭🍬🍫🧋🥨🥬🍦🍧🧊🐇🍩

I would match you with John romantically and Isen platonically!!

*Both of them are chaotic and they’re both extroverts so I think they’d fit well with you being an introvert

*Plus they can help you socialize or just introduce you to their friends (which is how i’ve made all of my friends lol)

*I was having a hard time decided who would fit best where and then I got to your type lol

*While John’s a gym guy, I don’t think he’d make you work out but he would always invite you to see if you wanna come along

*If you do come along with him, he’d make sure to make it fun and enjoyable for you. But when he asks, he makes it clear you don’t have to tag along unless you actually want to

*I HC both of them suck at math so you all can struggle together :D

*You and Isen probably have similar music tastes

*John obvi doesn’t care about swearing lol

[i-am-just-a-kiddo]

rules: create your own post and tag 9 people to get to know better or catch up with

thank you for tagging me in this, @vishcount, eventhough we catch up every day basically 💞 i am tagging @cortue, @sassyassassy and @the-cloud-whisperer! no pressure in answering these questions to such detail, just do however you feel like. (ED) i’m sorry i forgot to tag @intyalote because i wish to know you better too! 

my ramblings under the cut: 

last song listened to:  Change (Feat. GRAY) (Prod. 코드 쿤스트 CODE KUNST) by Kid Millie

code kunst is one of my absolute favourite musical artists and i always discover new projects he was part of. this one is my recent favourite, i’ve just been listening to it up and down the past few weeks so my youtube shuffle automatically plays this.

last movie watched: The Yin Yang Master (2021) 

just like vishie, this was the last movie i watched and i think overall it was very fun? i found it very cute and entertaining in its world-building, as well as the visual design. also chen kun as qingming truly.....hits differently, wow. so it was hard to keep my cool about him because somehow he is way too stunning in my eyes. i also enjoyed the found family trope? it was very sweet. but as vishie noted too, the movie did not leave much place for the characters to develop properly so it would have deserved more time in that department. i was not that attached to any of them because the movie focused more on the plot happening than the character driven story. also funny how the yin yang master: dream of eternity was a wonderful gay feast while this movie just pulled the no homo card lol

currently reading: When The Light Of The World Was Subdued, Our Songs Came Through, A Norton Anthology of Native Nations Poetry (Ed. Joy Harjo, Leanne Howe, Jennifer Elise Foerster and more) 

i wished for this book for christmas and finally received it a few weeks ago. the past two years i’ve mostly been reading poetry (if you leave out readings for university) and i really want to educate myself on native cultures and their past. i think this is an amazing book that has a long introduction about its creation and the choices made on how the poems should be assembled. i love how so many different voices across geography, time and ages gets presented and i am excited to read more. apart from that, i am just waiting for uni taking up all my reading space again.

currently craving: a cold beer? 

since yesterday the weather has been so incredibly lovely and spring-like, i just want to go sit outside in the park or by the river and have a beer with someone. might do that tomorrow? i am feeling the holiday vibes. (also i am hungry so i should probably cook soon hmm)

current project: uni and fic ideas (and a fishtank?)

for uni i will need to hold a presentation about materiality in viennese modern designs during 1880-1930. i have this ceramic vessel by dagobert peche as my topic and i’m excited to dive into it because i am not well-versed in viennese art in general? and from what i’ve seen from his designs he took a lot of inspiration from japanese ceramics and chinese brush paintings which fits me past studies. also the question of materiality has never been the biggest focus in my studies so i am curious what will come of it, especially since our course leader wants to get us into the exhibition and hold the presentation in front of the actual object, which i have never done before (thanks covid).

i have some fic ideas which i want to get into but right now they are more vague concepts - i’ve been doing some research on korea during the 1880s-1890s for some very loosely dorian gray inspired au, but let’s see if this will take any reasonable shape. i’m also thinking about more wen ning & song lan content and maybe, possibly, some wen kexing character study? let’s see. am slowly getting back to writing and i am lowkey proud. 

and yes, i want to get a fishtank in our flat. i am so ready to have one again and my flatmates agreed so there is nothing standing in my way

current mood: tired but content

i overslept my first alarm today so i had a very stressful morning (it usually takes ages for me to get out of bed) and i did most of my first lecture but then decided to ditch it to hang out with my flatmates which was the best decision tbh. i also skipped the second lecture to hang out with them and go on a walk later to enjoy sunshine? so i think this day was very much successful on the social part. i even had ice cream. 

current wish: for my writing to return from war

i’ve lamented about this for the past few months on here, but it truly is weighing down my heart a lot. i just miss writing okay. i know i shouldn’t be hard on myself and accept that i need a break too, because indeed - i can’t force it and there is no need in beating myself up. but it still hurts because there is always something missing. i think the past two weeks i have been feeling a little bit more ready to return to it? though i truly need to be understanding with myself if it doesn’t work as i want it to. 

currently learning: materiality, persian book art and queer theory

as mentioned above, i have one course about materiality in arts, crafts and designs, focused on 1880-1930 vienna. i am also attending a lecture about persian book art from the 14th century onwards, though i have taken so many lectures with this professor already, i feel like he is repeating himself so much? i hope i will learn something new at least, so far it feels like i’m hearing the topics for the third time. and then i have a lecture about queer theory which is exactly my crowd - the people, the professor and the discussions give me so much and bring all these topics that i think about in my free time into a theoretical and scientific realm? so it’s nice to study these things in a systematic way - as systematic as it’s possible with a topic such as queer theory. this lecture just makes me feel seen and also allows me to get a broader sense of understanding how these studies developed.

something that makes you proud: my niemo oneshot  and my social activities

last week i wrote a short snippet for nie huaisang/mo xuanyu and it was the first time i had written in ages? so i feel very proud of it. and something i have been proud of lately is that i manage to be socially active a lot without feeling like all my energy has been sucked out of me? i am genuinly having fun being with people - of course it exhausts me a lot and i take breaks, but all in all it truly got easier socialising ever since i started taking my meds. my anxiety levels aren’t as high as they used to be and it helps me appreciate the presence of other people in a completely new way. this allows me not to feel like i am running away when i take time for myself. 

if you’ve read all of this, thank you! this was a fun little something 

[leejeongz]

Stray kids reaction to your large family

🥰I wasn’t too sure how to write this so I’m sorry if it’s not what you expected. Thanks for requesting tho!!🥰

Scenario: it’s your birthday party and all your family members are invited... every last one of them.

Bang Chan:

At first he might be a little overwhelmed. He wanted to make a good impression of himself but that was a lotttt of people to big himself up to. But eventually he’d be okay, he’d definitely be the type to make a conscious effort to learn every family members name and remember important facts about them.

“I think you should get your oldest sister these cat oven gloves because she likes cats and she’s moving into a new house, right? Plus they are super cute”

Woojin:

Woojin would be confident. He’d be able to handle your large family and work the room, pretty impressive tbh. Instead of trying to say good things about himself, he’d more than likely be saying good things about you. When your siblings jokingly disagree of course he’ll play along though. Although you’re family would be interested in his career, he wouldn’t want any of them to be focused on that, after all that doesn’t define him as a person.

“I’m a singer but in my opinion y/n sings better”

Lee Know:

Tries to come up with an effective and logical method to remember everyone. A little reserved when he sees how big your family is, hearing it is totally different to actually being there with them. He’d prefer to meet each “separate family” separately rather than together just because that’s easier for him but given the circumstances he’d get on with it and make on a small amount of fuss to you. Probably asks you daily how you cope.

“Daniel has purple hair and a nose stud... he better not change that now”

Changbin:

A little reserved when the whole family is around, he wants to impress everyone but becomes shy and clings to you, hoping you’ll introduce him. Despite his desperate clinging, actually doesn’t want to show too much pda in case your family don’t like it or think he’s too much of a wimp. Cautiously approaches people on his own like they are gonna eat him or something.

“Y/n please hold my hand... actually no I’m a leo, a lion, I can do this grr... teehee”

Hyunjin:

A very shy boy. Your family would probably have to go over and talk to him if they wanted any kind of conversation out of him but he didn’t want to seem rude so he would at least try. He’d try his hardest to stay with the people he knew before the party and hope that people would come over to them and that’s how he’d be able to meet people.

“Y/n can you ask your mum to bring the pretty lady in the purple dress over and her kids... I promise this is the last one”

Han:

He didn’t have a problem socialising with everyone in your family. He thought he was really fun to meet everyone finally after you’d told him and his eyes lit up with every new person that walked though the door. When you talk about someone after he’d probably ask “which was that?” And when you explain would probably follow it up with “aw man I loved them!” All in all he loved your family however big or small it was, especially since they made him feel so welcome.

“Can we go and see your aunt and your cousins today? They are so cool and she said she’ll cook some paella for us which sounds yummy”

Felix:

Before he goes into the room he’d try to convince himself that you were just lying about having a big family but when he saw that you weren’t, all he could do was laugh. I feel like he’d approach people at first but soon he’d realise that people were approaching him more because you’d told them he was amazing and really fun and whatnot. Honestly he’d feel kind of at home and he loved your numerous family just as much as he loved you.

“You like my accent? I don’t have an accent?”

Seungmin:

Kinda excited for the party until it actually sinks in how many people there are in your family. His mouth would drop but nevertheless he’d go around and introduce himself to every single person, even if it took him all evening. That night he’d be pretty tired but he couldn’t wait to get to know each person a little bit better.

“I think I’m gonna go to bed now, I hope you had an amazing night y/n, I did!”

I.N:

Reluctantly goes to each family member with you, not as in he doesn’t want to just that he doesn’t want people to think he too loud or trying too hard or whatever, he wants your family to think he’s chill. He’s kind of shy until you actually get talking to the person. The size of the family wouldn’t matter to Jeongin but it was really big to him, it’s not that he feels oppressed, he’s just not used to it. By the end of the night, he’d be best buddies with your younger cousins and swapping recipes with your aunts.

“Y/n look at him playing with the little train set I’m gonna cry!!!”

Gifs aren’t mine

[jestersreap]

Get to Know Me tag

Get To Know Me Tag Thing    

Rules: Always post the rules. Tag 11 new people you’d like to know better.

1. Dogs or Cats? Cats, even though I’m allergic. I like independent animals lol

2. YouTube celebrities or normal celebrities? I don’t realllllly like either but i have a special disdain for youtubers LMAO. im sorry, I just do.

3. If you could live anywhere where would that be? Iceland? Somewhere that gets proper snow?

4. Disney or DreamWorks?  Gotta be Dreamworks. also shrek

5. Favourite childhood TV show? UhMM... I was obSESSED with beyblade as a kid, but there’s honestly so many other shows. I was kind of an early binger.

6. The movie you’re looking forward to most in 2020?

SONIC MOVIE SONIC MOVIE SONIC MOVIE

7. Favorite book you read in 2019? Ooooh. Probably ‘Cat Out of Hell’ by Lynne Truss - it’s hilarious

8. Marvel or DC? Can I say neither? I’m not big on superheroes at all

9. If you choose Marvel favorite member of the X-Men? If you choose DC favourite Justice League member? See above

10. Night or Day?

Daytime - as much of a night owl I am, the daylight makes me feel better

11. Favourite Pokemon?  I CANT PICK so I’ll go with current gen: THIEVUL <3

12. Top 5 bands:

Mystery Skulls, The Hoosiers, uh... I actually don’t listen to music much; I maybe listen to a band’s album once every 3-6 months lmao

13. Top 10 books.

Howl’s Moving Castle trilogy, Battle Royale, Six of Crows, uhhhh I can’t remember any more.

14. Top 4 movies

Robots, Kingsman (both of them), John Wick (All of them), PROMARE(!!!)

15. America or Europe? Never been to America but I think I prefer Europe lmao

16. Tumblr or Twitter? Tumblr tbh cuz it doesn’t keep trying to make me look at ‘top posts’ like twitter does. Though I find it easier to socialise on twitter.

17. Pro-choice or Pro-life? Choice

18. Favorite YouTuber? Answered earlier tbh, but If I have to, there’s one channel that just silently shows off different vending machines in Singapore/Thailand that I like. Does that count as a YouTuber?

19. Favorite author ? I don’t think I read enough for this but I think Murakami’s works are dope.

20. Tea or Coffee? Coffee gives me life but tea is like getting a hug in drink form

21. OTP ? Uhhh. I don’t really ship.. I guess? But I AM a sucker for Ladybug and Chat Noir stuff.

22. Do you play an instrument/sing ? I completely lack any musical talent whatsoever, but that apparently doesn’t stop me trying. Most recently I’ve been trying to play a Melodica, but I’m fucking awful at it, like every other instrument I’ve tried. I’ve never had lessons in anything though lol

tagged by: .@avwalya​ and .@crow-umbra​ - thanks!

tagging anyoneeeeeeeeeee bc im tired and im a rulebreaker

[geekygee01]

Let Me Introduce Myself

I was tagged by both the lovely @searchforanotherway and @tansypoisoning so here goes (ps, love love you guys)

Name: Claudia, I don’t really have any common nicknames, just embarrassing ones that my fam calls me

Pronouns: She, her

Age: 18 

Birthday/Birth Month: April 19th 

What’s in my wardrobe: I have a very eclectic mix of clothes; plaid, leather, flowery dresses, conservative skirts and blouses, what some may consider skimpy dresses, jumpers and sweaters, plain jeans, printed jeans, trakkie pants etc...

Here’s an idea of what I look like (female avatar/unisex avatar)

(wasn’t sure which to use so I did both hahaha)

Tumblr or AO3: I prefer to find and read fics on AO3 and I do find the posting/formatting easier, but I love tumblr and being able to interact and socialise more with so many lovely people.

When did I discover fanfiction: Oh Jesus, I really could not tell you, I feel like I’ve always known it hahaha, if I had to guess I would say when I was like 10 or younger and stumbled upon fanfiction of Claudia from Interview with the Vampire (I was trying to find out more about who I was named after)

How did I get into sark/yandere tropes: Probably the same answer, there were some dark fics about Claudia, some of them where she was dark, others where she was a victim. Though I wouldn’t say I was ‘into’ them at the time. When I got a little bit older and actively sought out fics I guess I was just always more drawn to the darker fics; whump, angst, dub/noncon/rape etc..

My kinks in a few words: Daddy, control, pain, dom/sub, dubious

My favourite marvel character (A.K.A. which character would I want to lock me up in their basement): Can I just be in the basement of the Avengers base and they all come down and use me for stress relief??

My favourite fanfic by me: (I don’t want to accidentally sound up myself) I think my fic All Night, was pretty well written, it was my first foray into Criminal Minds.  Also my Peter Parker x reader fic Subtle, especially considering it was like my first smut fic. 

An underrated fanfic by me: Tbh I think most of my fics are underrated but I’d say the most underrated one would definitely be ‘Searching for Something, I can’t reach’ though it is incomplete so that might be the reason it hasn’t gotten much attention.

One of my favourite fanfics by someone else: Oof way to put me on the spot, there are so many great fics and so many amazing writers I can’t choose. I guess I’ll go with the fic I’m reading right now ‘And Now You’re Mine’ by Tarash on AO3.

Other fandoms I like/would like to write about: Game of Thrones, Umbrella Academy, maybe DC (all I can think of right now)

Something everyone should know about me: This is a tricky one, maybe that I have chronic illness/disease.  An interesting thing about me is when I was a kid I shattered my skull, oh and one time while playing netball I dislocated my finger but I wanted to keep playing so I relocated it myself but I obviously didn’t do the best job and somehow managed to pop it out the other side and now it’s stuck all fudged up.

Friends I want to know better )A.K.A. tagging): @jtargaryen18 , @imdarkinme , @the-soulofdevil , @heycasbutt , @sherrybaby14 , @cake-writes 

[imrainai]

[OOC Message log, imrainai & trashrightsactivist]

These are really old. Like, last in-universe year old. But some people wanted to see them, so here they are.

Summer, 3422

imrainai: Could I read the sideblog? You have a lot of really interesting things to say, and I'd like to read them. If you're ok with it. ^_^'

Trashrightsactivist: I would trust a promise from you, you seem trustworthy. So I will add you if you promise me that you understand how serious it could be if someone like tidalwave got hold of information that could tell her who I am in real life - I could quite easily die - and also promise you won't mention any of that info anywhere public. Is that okay?

Imrainai: Yeah, I promise. I definitely don't want anything bad to happen to you.

Trashrightsactivist: cool, adding you in a sec

Weeks Later

imrainai: ruby? are you ok? just laying low for a bit? You're safe, right?

Trashrightsactivist: yes. i am very sad and angry about things. but safe.

Imrainai: <3 please stay safe ok

Trashrightsactivist: i'll do my best. you too

Later

Imrainai: I think the internet's gonna cut out in a bit, so just wanted to tell you again to stay safe and take care of yourself. you're a good internet friend, OK, so make sure you're still here when I get back

Imrainai: taz liked your story about the aliens btw. I had to modify it some because I don't want him telling his teachers he's getting red-positive propaganda at home, it was about criminals and poor people. but the basic moral was intact, and he seemed to agree with it.

I just... be careful, OK, the world needs all the good people it can get

Trashrightsactivist: thank you. and I'm glad he liked the story, it's about the downtrodden whatever colour their hair is so yeah

Weeks Later

imrainai sent a post caste flexibility meme!

Imrainai: tag, you're privately it

Imrainai: also the internet's back and your blog is not back, are you still there

Trashrightsactivist: I will post caste meme soon. I have a secret new blog.

Trashrightsactivist: as in - the blog is not a secret but the fact that it's me is a secret

Trashrightsactivist: what i learned from tryna fill out the meme is mostly that i would be a sucky purple :P

Imrainai: ohhh, ok

Imrainai: also same

Imrainai: but I also feel like I'd feel like that no matter what I was. probably everything looks easier than it is from the outside

Trashrightsactivist: well you're like coping and looking after a baby so you must be doing something right! But probably true

Imrainai: at least if i were YELLOW i could ADVANCE in the LIBRARY SYSTEM

Imrainai: but yeah I guess Ves is more important anyway, so I can't be, like, totally failing at life in general

Trashrightsactivist: yeah that's one of the dumb things about the caste system tbh - as a purple its super hard to get anywhere really successful unless you got this one specific skillset of 'run a business'

Imrainai: well you can only run certain kinds of businesses, is the thing. like, I can't start an editing service or watch other people's kids or something

Trashrightsactivist: which is sooo dumb

Imrainai: I do not think I could, like, successfully run a restaurant or a furniture company or make clothes

Imrainai: there are lots of options, so you'd think ONE of them would work, but so far nah

Imrainai: ............I should probably not actually be complaining about my life circumstances to you, that seems rather inconsiderate

Trashrightsactivist: hmm - idk if homeschooling is a thing in Voa. If I was the kinda oddball economics green i mighta been in another life I would suggest you might be able to set up a purple-for-purple homeschooling group and argue the income as being purple either on the basis of it being like house spousing or like consultation (in that being your caste *is* the qualifying factor for a purple-for-purple homeschool)

Trashrightsactivist: and nah, it's fine - it's actually helpful to give me different things to think about tbh

Trashrightsactivist: you could apply the same argument to a daycare specifically meant to socialise purple kids in a purple environment. But idk your employment law well enough you'd need to get a solicitor to advise on it.

Imrainai: Homeschooling is a thing, but I think if you make money at it it stops being homeschooling

Imrainai: I dunno, maybe one of the librarians can help me figure it out tho

Imrainai: they're good about stuff like that

Trashrightsactivist: yeah, I mean at minimum they can probably help you find and understand the books with the law stuff in

Imrainai: Liet's orange and I could maybe finagle something around that, but she's old enough that asking her to actually work is not really.... fair to her, so

Imrainai: and yeah

Trashrightsactivist: what is it you actually do rn if you don't mind me asking? or are you at home with the kid?

Imrainai: oh! no, I work two jobs

Imrainai: I do cleaning at a nursing home and I shelve books at the library

Imrainai: And my second cousin is living here too, she works in a warehouse and sometimes watches the baby

Trashrightsactivist: ahh, right. I was confused for a bit cause i remember a post about the 1st one and i thought you were a care worker and was like 'that's purple?'

Trashrightsactivist: is that liet? the orange person?

Imrainai: Liet's my great-great-grandmother, I am am sort of EFFECTIVELY her caretaker but she's family so I don't get paid for that

Imrainai: and I do look after the old people at the nursing home, but that is not actually my job, it is just... a thing that happens when I am in close proximity to people who need things

Trashrightsactivist: really should be crossover work

Trashrightsactivist: you know one of those jobs thats two castes

Trashrightsactivist: if orange-grandma lives with you it miight be doable to do the daycare and have it that like, she owns it officially and employs you, but again you'd need to check out the legalities

Imrainai: I mean in THEORY there is a simple dividing line between "care worker" and "cleaning lady" but with elderly people the line is not always actually clear

Trashrightsactivist: yeah thats why it should be crossover

Trashrightsactivist: are you any good with numbers and people management?

Imrainai: And yeah, maaaaybe, but if anyone ever investigated it I think it would rapidly become obvious that Liet wasn't really... doing anything

Imrainai: I've never really tried those things?

Imrainai: I don't think I'm awful with numbers

Imrainai: Though I never got past algebra in school

Trashrightsactivist: I imagine you gotta have people skills to a degree cause like - you're really nice, and dealing with the old ppl probably requires like, being nice but firm

Trashrightsactivist: wouldn't require algebra just finance - you could build up to a small cleaning business?

Imrainai: Oh, I hadn't thought about that, but I guess there's no reason that should be illegal

Imrainai: I do all the budgeting here, I can handle money OK

Trashrightsactivist: yeah well afaik that is entirely a purple thing to be doing, it's cleaning and it's business

Imrainai: That makes sense

Trashrightsactivist: and your library connections and self-starter attitude will mean you can pick up the extra knowledge you'd need

Imrainai: I don't know if I'd actually make more money than just working at the nursing home, but I can look into it

Trashrightsactivist: probly need some seed money i guess

Imrainai: ...yeah, you need some to get started I think

Trashrightsactivist: yeah it would at least have more potential to grow, is what i was thinking

Imrainai: but not THAT much for a cleaning business, you don't need an office or anything for that really

Imrainai: I bet you could do it with just a web page actually

Imrainai: not that I know how to make a decent website

Trashrightsactivist: yeah you probably wouldn't make more to start with but could eventually - if you read the books and stuff and came up with a good business model you could probably pitch it to people to get a small investment for like, a website and some supplies, maybe a vehicle

Trashrightsactivist: tell the nursing home they can hire you as a contractor through your business, but if you've got other work you have more leverage to get better pay there

Imrainai: That's an interesting idea... I dunno if they'd go for it, but at least this is something to look into. It's good to have options.

Imrainai: Thanks :)

Trashrightsactivist: I mean. In a sane world you could learn more about the library while you stack shelves and work your way up to librarian but we don't live in a sane world

Trashrightsactivist: np :) I better get back to work but good luck if you decide to try it

Trashrightsactivist: oh secret new me is truth-from-ashes btw. Trusting you to keep that sceret.

Trashrightsactivist: ttyl

Weeks Later

Imrainai: Wanted to thank you for the idea to start a business. Liet's going to be starting up after-school tutoring really soon, and apparently it's absolutely legal for me to volunteer at her business and for her to then put that money towards food and rent. I'll get to make money while spending time with my family and helping Taz and his classmates with their homework. :D

Days Later

Imrainai: ruby did you hear about the thing

Imrainai: the orvara thing

Imrainai: you're not in orvara are you

Days later

Imrainai: please don't be in orvara

Later

Trashrightsactivist: I'm not there. I'm sorry if my absence from the online was worrying- reds everywhere are panicky right now and that's been my focus.

Imrainai: no no it's ok! just wanted to make sure you weren't. uh. actually dead

Imrainai: be safe

Imrainai: or as safe as possible I guess

Trashrightsactivist: You too. I don't know what's going to happen now but it's not going to be good and it's not going to just be us that suffers for it in the end.

Fall, 3422

Imrainai: ruby are you still alive and kicking and there and stuff

Several weeks later

Imrainai: rubyyyyyyy

[raaven-nerd]

50 Question Studyblr Tag!

I saw this a while ago, and really wanted to do it, but never got around to doing it until now! 

GENERAL

What country are you studying in now? Sydney, Australia

What’s your major or specialization? none? I’m still in high school lol

What year are you in? I’m in year 9 :)

What courses are you taking (/will be taking if on break)? I take all the mandatory year 9 courses (maths, science, English, geography, history, careers, phys ed), as well as drama, Japanese, and agriculture.

Favorite course? Drama! It’s so much fun. After that it’d probably be Japanese, and then science.

What languages do you know? Want to learn? English and Cantonese (which I speak at home but i can’t read/write) and I am learning Japanese at school. I’d like to learn Mandarin, French and Latin, but I had to drop French and Latin at school because I could only study one language :((

What language do you study in? Do you think in a different language? Nup- English only! Though very very very rarely I might think in Cantonese if I’m surrounded by my family who are only Cantonese speakers

Career aspiration? Vet or psychologist?? Idk I’m still in year 9.

If you couldn’t be #8, what would you be? Doctor?? Idek tbh. Maybe a teacher but kids are crazy sometimes lol

Moment you knew what you wanted to do? Idk, my family’s been a big influence on me, and I’ve always wanted to be a doctor since I was little, but that’s changed slightly as I’ve gotten older.

STUDY ENVIRONMENT

Where is your favorite place to study? At school in any classroom tbh or in the school library

When is your favorite time to study? Early morning right after I get up or in the afternoon after school

Clean desk or organized mess? Clean desk?? Idk I try to keep it clean as possible but bc I have so many subjects books and pens are everywhere, but I clean it up quickly bc I can’t handle messy desks.

Music or no music? What type? Music. Anything tbh. As long as there’s some noise in the background, I’m happy.

Name top 3 worst distractions. My dog, YouTube, friends (when they text me and the notifications that come up on my phone)

Exam time, dress up or dress down? School uniform lol

Exam time, hair up or hair down? Hair up in a ponytail - it’s my default hair style for school and it keeps my hair out of my face, but I can still play with it :)

Favourite outfit for studying? Leggings and a T-shirt

Favourite study scent? um?? I dont really use scents when i study so ???

STUDY TOOLS

Name 5 things you would consider your ‘study essentials’. A highlighter, a black pen, white out, reinforced line paper and my laptop

Hardcopy books or pdf online? Both? If I had to choose one, probably pdf because its easier to transport

Favourite study snack? drink? Cookies/chips with chocolate milk

Favourite pen (or pencil)? Papermate Inkjoys

Favourite notebook/paper? Idk I’m not too fussy and I just buy the cheapest lol

Name 5 apps/tools that help you be productive. Google Docs (allows me to do my assignments on the go), Todoist, Google Calendar, Forest, Google Drive (textbooks + resources saved there)

How many pens/pencils/markers are in your pencil case? 4 pens, 2 pencils, 0 markers (but 2 highlighters, if they count as markers)

Backpack or purse? Backpack

How many notebooks do you have? Wayy too many lol I’ll just list the ones I use (and I’ll include my exercise books for school) so 1 for each subject except drama so 9, one for random notes, one for planning each day out (but not a bujo) and one for drawing

STUDY HABITS

How do you motivate yourself when you’re not motivated? Watch study related videos on YouTube

Pump up routine before writing an exam? Bag packed with all materials, all pens have ink, whiteout isn’t about to run out, go through notes in my head, or listen to music, and keep calm :)

Crammer or pacer? Pacer

Type of learner (kinesthetic, auditory, visual)? Visual

How do you plan? (digital, planner, lists, no plan, etc.) My diary, and I also jot things down in a notebook and in Google calendar/todoist

Preferred note-taking method? Handwritten

Do you make to-do lists? How? Yea, I just write out a list in a notebook

Do you stick to your to-do lists? Mostly, but if something comes up, or there’s a lot to do, there’s not much I can do about that

Group study or independent study? Independent, unless the group is with people who are actually going to study

Average number of hours of sleep during exam time? 7-8, pretty much what i normally get 

Ever pulled an all-nighter? Ye once, and it wasn’t even for anything important, I just got caught up in reading lol

STUDY MENTALITY

What do you do to recover from getting a grade lower than expected? I don’t normally get too worked up over grades. I’d feel a bit disappointed in myself, and it’d stick in my head for a bit. But I’d forget about it pretty quickly because whenever I get grades, its always during school where I’m with my friends, and we discuss other things to take our minds off it.

One advice you’d give others? I mean, I’m only in Year 9 but don’t stress the small stuff? Just take life as it comes, and sometimes there’s not much you can do about what happens. Try hard, and work hard, and you’ll achieve your goals eventually.  

What are you most proud of right now? I got Dux of English last year, and got an award for outstanding academic excellence in my area in Year 6 

Favorite quote to keep you going? “Working hard is important, but there is something that matters even more. Believing in yourself.” - Harry Potter

Favorite way to destress? Socialising, drawing, or watching Youtube/movie

OTHER

Favourite 5 studyblrs? ahh there’s wayyy to many to list out: some include: @studyquill @emmastudies @studyign @optomstudies @universi-tea

How often do you check Tumblr? 2x-3x a day?? idk it depends on the day

Hobbies when you’re not studying? reading, drawing/animating, 

Favourite compulsory-reading book? There aren’t really that many books I’ve had to read... I remember once in Year 6, I had to read Warhorse by Michael Morpurgo, and I quite liked it. 

First nerdy joke that pops into your head. I once told a chemistry joke, but there was no reaction. 

[theprettysettersclub]

tagged by @kawaii-kozume

1) Are you really ready for 93 questions?

am i ever ready for anything

2) Was your last real relationship a mistake?

never been in a relationship

3) Who did you last say “I love you" to?

probably @purpleninjadancer​

4) Do you regret it? 

nope

5) Have you ever been depressed? 

ya

6) Are you a boy or girl? 

i mean y’know ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

7) Who is your best friend? 

@purpleninjadancer​

8) How do you want to die? 

tbh lowkey wanna die in like a really stupid way

9) What did you last eat? 

leftover lasagna

10) Played any sports? 

i swim

11) Do you bite your nails ?

no but i pick at them when i’m stressed

12) When was your last physical fight? 

never

13) Do you have an attitude? 

yes i do

14) Do you like someone? 

ya

15) What is your real name? 

Nikki

16) Are you gonna get high later? 

nah

17) Do you hate anyone at the moment? 

absolutely. I have a list

18) Do you miss someone? 

i miss a lot of people

19) Twirl or cut your spaghetti? 

why would anyone ever cut spaghetti

20) Do you tan a lot? 

not really

21) Have any pets? 

one dog and three cats

22) How exactly are you feeling? 

i could fall asleep right now

23) Ever eaten food in a car while someone or yourself is driving? 

of course

24) Ever made out in the bathroom? 

nah

25) Would you take any of your exes back? 

dont have any exes

26) Are you scared of spiders?

ok its not that i’m afraid of spiders, but if i see one and i’m not expecting it then i will either scream or hit it

27) Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? 

probably

28) Do you regret anything from your past? 

a lot of things

29) What are your plans for this weekend? 

i’m going to anime milwaukee

30) Do you want to have kids? 

not particularly

31) Did you ever kiss someone whose name starts with an M? 

mom lmao

32) Do you type fast? 

haha no

33) Do you have piercings? How many? 

i’ve got my ears pierced

34) Want any more? 

not really bc i never even wear earrings now

35) Can you spell well? 

i like to think so

36) Do you miss anyone from your past? 

yeah

37) What are you craving right now? 

ice cream

38) Ever been to a bonfire party? 

nope

39) Have you ever been on a horse? 

once in tennessee and it wasn’t my favorite

40) Kissed someone in a pick up truck?

nope

41) Have you ever broken someone’s heart?

not that i’m aware of?

42) Have you ever been cheated on?

can’t be cheated on if you’ve never been in a relationship

43) Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? 

nope

44)Would you live with someone without marrying them? 

absolutely

45) What should you be doing? 

homework or working on fics

46) What’s irritating you right now? 

how much hw i have for math

47) Have you ever liked someone so much that it hurts? 

i mean i’m doing it right now

48) Does somebody love you? 

??? idk

49) What is your favorite color? 

seijou blue

50) Have you ever changed clothes in a vehicle? 

ya

51) Do you have trust issues? 

lowkey sometimes i do bc of insecurities

52) Do you have a good relationship with your parents? 

yeah i think so

53) Do you believe your most recent ex thinks about you? 

~no ex~

54)Who was the last person you cried to? 

i think it was my brother

55) Do you give out second chances too easily?

yes because everyone deserves a second chance, but that’s usually it

56) Is it easier to forgive or forget? 

probably forget

57) Is this year the best year of your life?

not really

58) What was your child hood nickname? 

the only thing ive ever really been called was nikki

59) Have you ever walked outside completely naked? 

nope

60) Do you believe everything happens for a reason? 

i think so but i also believe in chance so basically everything happens and you have to find the reason for it

61) What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? 

work on one of my fics and snapchat a friend

62) Do you socialise often? 

i mean i have to bc school. out of school not so much

63) What is bothering you? 

ap physics is hard

64) Have you ever been out of your state? 

ya a couple of times and ive even been out of the country twice

65) Do you play the Wii? 

yeah but like half the time its for gamecube games

66) Are you listening to music right now? 

yep. i can’t stand the silence it makes me uncomfortable

67) Do you like Chinese food? 

not particularly

68) Do you know your fathers b- day? 

its sept 7 or 8 i think but idk

69) Are you afraid of the dark? 

no but i am afraid of my fireplace in the dark

70) Is cheating ever okay? 

no

71) Are you mean?

not usually but if you’re one of the few people i legitimately dislike i can be the meanest person you’ve ever met because i don’t forget things

72) Can you keep white shoes clean? 

for a while but after a bit i don’t see a reason to

73) Do you believe in true love? 

i think so

74) Do you like the outside? 

only when it’s relatively cold bc otherwise i get too hot

75) Are you currently bored? 

not really but i’m also not not bored

76) Do you wanna get married? 

idk maybe

77) Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? 

idk

78) Are you hungry? 

i mean i really want my icecream

79) Have you ever made out for more than a half hour straight? 

nah

80) What makes you happy? 

haikyuu, miss kobayashi’s dragon maid, comments on fanfics, all my internet friends, @purpleninjadancer​

81) Would you change your name? 

i might

82) Ever been to Alaska? 

nope

83) Do you watch the news? 

not nearly as much as i should

84) What’s your zodiac sign? 

taurus

85) Do you like Subway? 

not at all

86) Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? 

i don’t even remember the last person i kissed so probably

87) Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? 

hope it’s platonically

88) Do you talk like your friends? 

probably

89) Have you ever seen someone you knew & purposely avoided them? 

all the time in public or if i just can’t deal with it then

90) Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? 

ya our friendship revolves around sending memes to each other

91) Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? 

probably ethan

92) Does it matter if your boyfriend smokes? 

as long as he doesn’t do it around me

93) Can you count to one million?

i mean i can but why would i

i’m gonna tag @haikyuuliberos, @purpleninjadancer, @space-bees, @fairyfairypie, @megane-oikawa, and @thehibiscusthief

[yolkygoblin]

I was tagged by @fairyfairypie TYSM!!

1) Are you really ready for 93 questions?

Haha, sure!!

2) Was your last real relationship a mistake?

haha, no relationships for me 

3) Who did you last say “I love you" to?

mom

4) Do you regret it?

no!!

5) Have you ever been depressed?

ye

6) Are you a boy or girl?

female

7) Who is your best friend?

@fairyfairypie irl!!

8) How do you want to die?

idk, i dont like to think about it too much

9) What did you last eat?

ice cream!!

10) Played any sports?

Currently figure skating~

11) Do you bite your nails ?

not since ive gotten braces 

12) When was your last physical fight?

never

13) Do you have an attitude?

idk sometimes 

14) Do you like someone?

haha ye but hes fictional 

15) What is your real name?

Allison!!

16) Are you gonna get high later? 

UHHH NO

17) Do you hate anyone at the moment?

no!!

18) Do you miss someone?

i miss a lot of people lol can i be more vague 

19) Twirl or cut your spaghetti?

what 

20) Do you tan a lot?

i stay indoors, but i dont burn so yes?

21) Have any pets?

3 dogs, 2 cats, and my bird

22) How exactly are you feeling?

uuuuuu content?

23) Ever eaten food in a car while someone or yourself is driving?

ye

24) Ever made out in the bathroom?

dude im too young for that crap

25) Would you take any of your exes back?

so the answer above

26) Are you scared of spiders?

not really, i dont want to touch them tho

27) Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?

maybe...

28) Do you regret anything from your past?

haha, ye

29) What are your plans for this weekend?

ICE SKATING COMPETITION

30) Do you want to have kids?

haha, not even a little bit

31) Did you ever kiss someone whose name starts with an M?

NOPE, NEVER KISSED SOMEONE SO

32) Do you type fast?

kinda

33) Do you have piercings? How many?

ear piercings

34) Want any more?

nope!!

35) Can you spell well?

depends 

36) Do you miss anyone from your past?

ye, i move a lot so...

37) What are you craving right now?

nothing at the moment 

38) Ever been to a bonfire party?

NO BUT I WANT TO

39) Have you ever been on a horse?

YES, IT WAS MAGICAL I RODE BARE BACK ONCE IT WAS SO MUCH FUN

40) Kissed someone in a pick up truck?

dude 

41) Have you ever broken someone’s heart?

i hope not

42) Have you ever been cheated on?

WHY ARE THERE SO MANY QUESTIONS LIKE THIS

43) Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?

??

44)Would you live with someone without marrying them?

nope

45) What should you be doing?

sleeping tbh

46) What’s irritating you right now?

nothing

47) Have you ever liked someone so much that it hurts?

fictional characters 

48) Does somebody love you?

Family??

49) What is your favorite color?

blue or dark cool colors

50) Have you ever changed clothes in a vehicle?

ye

51) Do you have trust issues?

i dont think so

52) Do you have a good relationship with your parents?

yep!!

53) Do you believe your most recent ex thinks about you?

DUDE

54)Who was the last person you cried to?

no idea

55) Do you give out second chances too easily?

i think everyone deserves a second chance wow i say stuff straight from naruto

56) Is it easier to forgive or forget?

forgive

57) Is this year the best year of your life?

idk every year has its ups and downs

58) What was your child hood nickname?

right now its wingman or allie, but i dont like allie very much

59) Have you ever walked outside completely naked?

I HOPE NOT

60) Do you believe everything happens for a reason?

ye

61) What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night?

watched fairy tail

62) Do you socialise often?

i tend to avoid it

63) What is bothering you?

nothing

64) Have you ever been out of your state?

OH YEAH

65) Do you play the Wii?

loz mostly

66) Are you listening to music right now?

nope

67) Do you like Chinese food?

ITS DEATH TO ME I HAVE ALLERGIES 

68) Do you know your fathers b- day?

feb 2? 4? idk im bad with dates

69) Are you afraid of the dark?

not super

70) Is cheating ever okay?

nope

71) Are you mean?

i try to not be

72) Can you keep white shoes clean?

nope

73) Do you believe in true love?

ye

74) Do you like the outside?

depends

75) Are you currently bored?

nope!!

76) Do you wanna get married?

idk 

77) Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby?

uhhhh no im not into in people in that way

78) Are you hungry?

nope

79) Have you ever made out for more than a half hour straight? 

PEOPLE DO THAT??

80) What makes you happy?

ALOT OF THINGS

81) Would you change your name?

no i like my name

82) Ever been to Alaska?

no, but i want to see a sunset there 

83) Do you watch the news?

nope its unreliable

84) What’s your zodiac sign?

Capricorn or Sagittarius depending on the change   

85) Do you like Subway?

I CANT HAVE BREAD

86) Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed?

i dont kiss people

87) Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

panic 

88) Do you talk like your friends?

i dont think so... maybe??

89) Have you ever seen someone you knew & purposely avoided them?

not that i know of

90) Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around?

uhhh maybe

91) Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to?

my brother

92) Does it matter if your boyfriend smokes?

yes 

93) Can you count to one million?

i dont want to

haha, this was fun!! thanks for tagging me!! i tag @tobilovesturtles !! but you dont have to do it if you dont want to!! 

[asksansweredpdf]

These are actually solid questions

1. First thing you wash in the shower? my hair

2. Are you more of a coffee or alcohol drinker? i can’t stand coffee. and alcohol might as well be my blood at this point

3. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? haha noooo. he was nice but i felt literally nothing. was like kissing a brick wall or something. tbh i never feel much when i kiss boys

4. Do you plan outfits? YES. i’m a drama queen and a diva and flamboyant and i need to look good always. i have my graduation in 2 days and i still haven’t planned what to wear and it’s bothering me

5. How are you feeling RIGHT now? tbh pretty numb. like not happy and not sad. just. .... chillin

6. Whats the closest thing to you thats red? my track pants

7. What would you do if you opened your door and saw a dead body? well with the mood im in now, i probably wouldn’t react. but the logical side of my brain would kick in and i’d phone it in to the police. 

8. Tell me about the last dream you remember having? it’s still that one about the creepy old dude touching me in the car. 

9. Three of your current feelings? -introspective -apathetic

-wistful

10. What are you craving right now? tbh i would very much love to hug my stuffed pink harold. but he’s downstairs and i just don’t have the energy to walk haha

11. Turn ons? not rly in the mood to answer these

12. Turn offs?

13. What comes to mind when I say cabbage? this vine

14. When was the last time you cried? Why? idk like over a month ago. i had to work a thursday night shift which is always super stressful. and that day my sister just started beating the shit out of me so the anxiety was like double

15. If you could be a superhero, who would you want to be? ironman. any day. or spiderman because it’d be fun to just swing around the city listening to music peacefully

16. Did the one person who hurt you most in your life apologize? nope. she doesn’t even know that i know about half the shit she did. never ever apologised about the stuff she knows i know about. no acknowledgement. no apology. just pretends it never happened

17. Do you bite into your ice cream or just lick it? lick it 

18. Favorite movie ever? idk i like frozen and pride and prejudice and the hunger games

19. Do you like yourself? i like myself, but i can’t seem to justify why. i don’t really have an identity. i don’t know what i’m like. and so it’s hard to like myself when i don’t know what i like about my self, or why i do. but i enjoy being myself.

20. Have you ever met a celebrity? i met stan walker once? he’s a minor celebrity in australlia

21. Could you handle being in the military? part of me would thrive in the structure and forced exercise and socialisation. another part of me would completely crumble because like i have anxiety

22. What are you listening to right now? i don’t give a ... - missio

23. How many countries have you visited? india, america, canada, australia. so 4 i guess

24. Are your parents strict? you betcha

25. Would you go sky diving? sure yeah. i’m afraid of heights so the adrenaline would be wild

26. Would you go out to eat with George W. Bush? nah. i dont give a shit about him. maybe i’d go if he paid for the food.

27. Whats on your mind right now? literally nothing. mostly thinking about endgame. i’m also thinking about taking my mum’s anti anxiety meds since she doesn’t use them and i have anxiety. but i don’t want to take them without professional advice. but also, i am a professional advice. and like what could happen? i’d get mentally ill?

28. Is there anything you want to say to someone? nah i dont really feel like talking atm. i guess i’d ask if they wanted to go for a smoke. i would love a cig rn

29. Have you ever been in a castle? no but i would love to!!

30. Do you rent movies often? not really, i just watch stan/netflix

31. Whats your zodiac sign? cancer sun, leo moon, libra rising

32. When was the last time you had sex? i haven’t had sex

33. Name five facts about yourself. i honestly don’t think i know enough about myself to do this but let’s give it a go -i have short hair -i love music more than literally anything -i turn 21 this year and i have no idea what to do for it -i’m thinking of getting a motorbike soon -i’ve never broken a bone

34. Ever had a near death experience? If so, what happened? nope

35. Do you believe in karma or predestiny? i used to. and i absolutely would love to believe in all that stuff. but not to sound angsty or whatever, i’ve had so many shitty things happen to me that it’s hard for me to believe that it’s all part of some big plan or that there is any justice in the world. i think people just do shit and that’s it

36. Brown or white eggs? ive never had white eggs so..... brown?

37. Do you own something from Hot Topic? nah we dont have it in australia

38. Ever been on a train? yeah man i love trains

39. Ever been in love? not mutually, no

40. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you do it? it’s a million bucks. absolutely. one night of terror to never have to worry about anything ever again. i’m a witch too so as much as i’d be scared, it’d be fine.

41. If you could trade places with any person living or dead, who would you trade places with? someone rich and famous. maybe harry styles or freddie mercury. i’m sure they didn’t have it easy, but it’s certainly easier than things have/ever will be for me you know?

42. If you could shorten your life expectancy by 10 years to become more attractive, would you do it? absolutely

43. Whom do you admire and why? i tend not to admire irl people. but i do admire tony stark a lot (GOD this is so lame ksajrsjkfs). i admire his charisma, his confidence, his humour, his good looks, his intelligence, his eyes. he embodies everything i feel like i can never be. but everything i’ll always want to be.  i admire freddie mercury. for his work drive and ethic. for his confidence and stage presence, his ability and talent in singing, songwriting, musical instruments. his flamboyancy, his sense of humour. again, these are all qualities i would love to have.

44. What was your favorite bedtime story as a child? oh i never really got read bedtime stories

45. You’re walking down the street, you come across a burning building. A woman says her baby is trapped inside, what would you do? internally, i’d be like “that sucks for you” and walk away. but i can’t be a dick, so i’d assess the extent of the fire and see if there was a way to save the baby. i’d try if so, if not idk what i’d do. panic and call 000?

46. If you could choose the future profession of your son or daughter, would you? nah man. gotta let kids live their lives 

47. What was your best experience on drugs or alcohol? alcohol: the night i just moved out of home 2 weeks ago. my roommate invited a friend over, and we all had fun and played never have i ever and i flirted with this really cute guy and had so much fun. i hadn’t really had any experiences like that before because i was - anyway. it was nice to feel like a normal 19 year old just for a second weed: either the time i was drunk and high at our housewarming party and went to the park and felt like i was on a fucking rollercoaster, or the time i got super cooked after work and had a shower which felt amazing and then went back to my room and listened to beautiful people beautiful problems. i didn’t hallucinate per se, but i closed my eyes and could like see the lyrics “blue is the colour of the planet from the view above”. it was like i was in outer space and could see the earth and i was so relaxed and it was so magical mdma: my halloween party! there were so many people and no one knew i was high and we had a mad dance party and i met some of our neighbours and i just had so much fun talking to everyone and Living. 

48. What was your worst experience on drugs or alcohol? alcohol: being around boring people when drunk is boring. especially because when i’m drinking i really want to have a good and fun time.  weed: ahh i have anxiety so i used to get a few panic attacks when i was smoking mdma: eugh it was my friends 21st at the time and we took mdma and i thought it wasnt kicking in because all we did was sit in bed and talk. literally so boring. im so mad that i wasted my first time like that

50. As your walking down the street you find a suitcase full of money sitting next to a parked car, would you take it? nah, i’d probably hand it in to the police. actually, i dont trust the police so i’d probably google what to do with it. but probably police because i cant have stolen money or give it to someone else. 

51. If you found that a close friend has AIDS, would you still hang out with them? not hanging out with someone because of that has literally never even crossed my mind

52. In front of you are 10 pistols, 5 of which are loaded. If you survive you’d receive 100 million dollars. Would you be willing to place 1 to your head and pull the trigger? nah. i’m actually going places now days

53. How old were you when you lost your virginity? tba

54. Do you believe in ghosts, werewolves or vampires? nope

55. If you could live forever, would you want to? yeah probably. i’d like to give it a trial run though. i’m very anxious, so being lonely and immortal might make it worse. but at the same time, being immortal might make it easier to not give a shit and to be less anxious

56. Which fictional movie character most resembles who you are? honestly i feel like jane villanueva or peter parker

57. If you could go back in time, which time period would you visit? i would love to be a victorian bitch with a bomb ass dress and waist

58. If they were to televise a live execution, would you watch it? probably not. unless it was someone i really hated, i wouldnt give a shit

59. If you could be the president of the USA, would you be willing to do it? i mean i wouldn’t be the best person for the job, but i also wouldn’t be the worst. if i could have time to properly study politics then yeah i’d consider. 

60. If you could choose the sex of your unborn child, would you want to? i’d probably want a girl but i dont really see any reason to not have a boy

61. Would you rather live longer or be wealthy? be wealthyyyyyy

[survivorelara]

Episode #1: “So thank you Gods and Goddesses.” -Ci’ere

three people on this tribe are 100% pros they have mangastars as their pfp im scared

Okay, this is my second time typing this because I accidentally deleted the first attempt ASDF. Hello every1 out there 👽 I'm so thrilled to be playing Elara because I know that the hosts are going to make this an awesome experience! We began our journey about an hour & a half ago, but something tremendous has already occured... I happened to snatch the Zosma idol on my first guess! Something about the placement of the 39th star spoke to me & luck was definitely on my side, so thank you celestial gods and goddesses! I’m kind of wondering if the idol locations & the iconic phrase “18 people, 39 days, 1 Survivor” have any correlation. Hmm. :O Even though I have some power to fall back on now, I don’t wanna have to rely on the idol to save myself so I’m stepping up to the plate socially to hopefully solidify myself in this group. I was hyped before, but this hype train has went through the ceiling!

Not only am I in this game with like many other Facebook ORGers.... I'm the least popular of them all. Like I see Emma, Ci'ere, Andrea and Toby... like they have a good friend group and people generally like them. Me on the other hand, I get easily annoyed with certain people and groups within this community and I have been told that I am a rainy and dark cloud. I mean, LOVE the comparison... but when you're in a "scavenger hunt" and one of the things is to get 50 reactions on a post and I average about 5-6... it ain't looking good for this bitch. And ITS ONLY DAY 1.

Great question. I am trying to figure that out. I realize not knowing discord puts me at s disadvantage. Let’s hope we win till I can figure it out.

Well I like this tribe, I'm feeling good about things at the moment, I've talked to loris, Andreaa, and John who I had a prior relationship with. They all seem nice enough. I'm hoping to make more connections with people in the near future, because with only 6 people on the tribe I need to make ABSOLUTE sure I'm in the numbers.

I'm such a flop, I did almost all my voice recordings on my phone while I accidentally left voice chat on. My Computer Mic isn't great and it was only for a little while, nobody said anything, so I don't know if anybody caught anything I might have said for the challenge, but the worst thing that might have been caught was my statement about Dani

We're approaching the end of Day 1 and I don't think I've made much progress with anyone other than John... this tribe is very quiet, and I don't know if that's due to many different timezones, or inactivity, or what have you. Regardless I'm a little worried about this challenge, but hopefully a win can be pulled out.

Its so quiet dawg

ok i love selfie scavenger hunts so this challenge is great. as for my tribe mates, roxy and i are in F6 in atomic together, so thats a interesting. Drew H was in that season and like. i have no idea what our relationship is going to be like ydgfs. the only person who I haven't talked to at all is Odd. i should get on that

Oh these motherfuckers think they got me found. They think they know me. Expect drama.

My tribe is ducking stacked with people I like so this is hot hopefully we can get this scav hunt done and get max point WEW

Well. I’m doing another one. Do I have the time? Nope! Is this a good idea? No ma’am/sir. But I’m doing it anyway. This is an...interesting tribe for me to be on. I have my one true love, Sam Drachus, and a tribe of people that probably don’t know he’s my husband. Of course, a pregame relationship never equates to an ingame relationship necessarily, so I will not rest in my socialisation (especially given I will have ass for physical game for a while). Louise I’ve hosted twice, Ci’ere I’ve hosted and played with. Dani and Brian I don’t really know properly but they seem very inactive. I am quite sure we will lose this challenge, but hopefully I can be active and bond-build enough to be Victorious!!

i hate this challenge because im so lazy

hi!! so my social game is going pretty good so far, i'm v tight with andrea, emma and i said we don't want each other to go, john's an icon and i like talking to zach. kori doesn't talk a lot so he'll probably be an ez boot. also i think im gonna end up with the most points for our immunity so that'll probably let me be spared if we do end up losing :)))). ALSO,,,,,,,,, i found the legacy advantage bc i clicked on seamus' manga on the tumblr?? of course they hid it behind the ugly one... no one looks there.

So our first challenge is a cute scavenger hunt & one of the 10 point items is getting 50 likes on a FB post. When I initially made the post, only a few people reacted to it so I knew I was going to have to do something drastic in order to get more people’s attention. I stole Nicki Minaj’s brand & started running KWEENT (6 letters Jack :p) Radio! I put in a lot of work to get people to help me out, but I also wanted to have fun with it & in the end it paid off. I’mma bit worried however since only Louise, Sam & I have made contributions to the challenge thus far. We don’t have that much time left & there’s still three empty columns... I’ve been talking a lot to Dani who I find I probably relate to the most. They made it pretty far in the actual Survivor casting process & they have also been talking to Sam. Sam is so nice & has that straight male humor, YEET. Louise is obviously a kween & we’ve played together before so I think I could work something out with her? Toby’s timezone & schedule is tough to work through, but I think I might be able to charm him up hehe. Brian is the only person that hasn’t shown any sign of life so I’ve been pushing for him, but of course he shows up now ASDFG.

Did so many challenges but have trouble uploading to gdoc

Anxiety is a bitch. Like I already have alot of it due to work and school, but for us to be submitting things for the scavenger hunt last minute... that made my heart quicken a bit more than needed. ESPECIALLY if your video links for the video portion of the hunt DON'T WORK. Like wth ODD? Like if you're gonna submit late.. like at least check the damn links so you can actually win the points for the videos that you are submitting. OH AND IN OTHER WORDS. I didn't think Jack was gonna view my poem to him. And he watched it. I have no words. Like let me die of embarrassment because I am flummoxed with a straight man once again in my life. ALL FOR 6 MEASLY POINTS IN A GAME! LIKE WHAT THE FUCK!?

That's so FETCH! Even with Odd's bumbling incapabilities, he can make us get a narrow win for reward! Maybe my frustrations were misplaced with him! But I am glad that I will not be the first boot and get to stay here for another 3 days or so! Pumped!

well just as i thought,,, TRASH this tribe has good people that i like but apart from ci'ere CHILEEEEEEE we sucked so bad we didn't deserve to win. I think it's brian that's going tbh he wasn't active till the last 4? hours of the comp and people have already said if we lose it's him so yikes guess that's what is happening.

we won the challenge which is actually surprising. Odd's links didn't work but if they did I would've had the lowest score. I was gonna do so much more but my phone won't charge !! and i went to a college fair ok. I love how i said i was good at comps during my live interview. i swear im not a liar hosts

Woo we won, I put a fair amount of work in, so I'm glad we got results... unfortunately it didn't REALLY matter because of how badly the losing tribe did.

I think I have a decent shot of making a 4-person alliance with John, Andrea, and Loris. Hopefully I can get that going through. Emma is LIKELY the weak link on the tribe, which is fine by me she has yet to talk to me really, so I'd have no qualms voting her out.

I have a funny story. I spent a half hour walking and  looking for a license plate with ce on it. I had to use scooter plates. Half the cars only have one letter. When I finally found the plate parked in front of a restaurant . I got on one knee to take the pic. It was night so flash went out. A guy came out and demanded I delete the photo. Not kidding. He was not happy. I couldn’t explain what I was doing. I deleted it. He drove away. I was really bummed. So I got on my motorcycle and drove to the university where I knew there were hundreds of scooters. I slowly drove while looking on both sides of the parking lot. I must of looked at more than 500 plates. Finally I found one. Guess what? It was the same scooter from earlier. This time the guy not around. I was still really nervous like I was breaking the law. When the flash went off I was waiting for the guy to start running at me. He didn’t. Success.

Well, I'm a bit scared. Apparently, Sam has already found something? Or someone has... Item 39 purportedly received the "There was something there, but isn't anymore" treatment, which is Scary AF! Like, if someone has an idol THIS early in the game...if I got idol'd out THIS early in the game!!

But, I suspect that whatever was hidden in Position 39 was not, in fact, an idol, but was rather some clue or aspect to the idol system. 50 possibilities isn't enough of a competition space for an idol search, right? I mean, I bloody hope so because the alternative is that a Zosma idol is already flying around at the literal first tribal council and, man, I don't need that paranoia right now.

Winning this challenge was way easier than I expected, I figure some inactive is about to die on the other tribe so no worries there. I had a blast this thing is gonna be a fun time if the challenges continue to be similar to this.

Well it's day 2, John and Andreaa seem on board for an alliance, now all I need is to hear what Loris thinks and if he seems on board, I've got my 4-some right there. Which'll leave Emma and Big Z on the outs. Which is fine, we could even split the votes in case of an idol if we felt like it.

But I can't afford to get too comfortable, players can be real snakes and I can't let myself be too trusting. I just have to work on being super relateable and someone people feel comfortable talking to.

I just hope I didn't start "talking game" too early…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Onr3BoPGJzA

I guess I cast assess now! Loris: he is a mood and playing hard but he likes me so for now we r gucci. He is super fun to talk to and we share idol guesses so hes aight! I dont want to work long term with him. Kori: Yikes. He's super inactive but he was like i like u lets form an alliance so ofc I'm like ok. He left me on read on the first day and randomly offered and im like k wyd i wasnt born yesterday Emma: Queen? I knew her before this we used to be married until she deactivated and I divorced her but like that literally not even the point. Shes kinda  inactive and very on the bottom besides Kori so I'm hoping I can convince Loris to keep her if we go to tribal twice. Big Z: Ok I have never met him before now but OMG ive heard so much about him AND I LOVE HIM!!! I get the hype and then some. I wish we talked more. I 100% would not vote him or Emma out rn. John: he's cool! I havent talked to him too much but were in an alliance Basically im really happy we won LMAO. I am in an alliance I have no plans of following through with. life is interesting. I may just go off the rails. I am predicting Brian goes home because Zosma is a facebook clusterfuck right now.

I’m winning this org... I’m in a silly alliance with kori Andrea and John that I’m not gonna take seriously but kori probably will... me and Andrea are rlly good allies and I have the legacy??? give me my money

We lost the challenge by a landslide. https://tenor.com/view/davonne-rogers-pretends-to-be-gif-6175133

Zosma was 400+ points behind the other tribes so they really did snatch us huh. I’m happy to hear that they’re active though unlike some of my tribemates for the past two days l m a o. I scored more than half of our aggregate, so I think I should be set to survive this vote.

Toby wants to share idol info and I can’t decline that so I gave him fake receipts hehe. He also stated that I’m the person he’s connected to the most. Sam says that I’m easy to talk to as well, so I think my social game is going pretty well at the moment!

Sam wants to vote for anybody that isn’t him & he also said he loved me 😳 L i s t e n: love is a BIG word (to me at least) & you can’t just throw it out to anyone & their mother, Sam. Louise is in the same mindset as myself as she’s talked to Toby/Dani more than Brian so let’s just snipe Brian right? Well, Toby comes to me after scoring 0 & says he has a “gut feeling” that we should vote out Dani because Brian is preoccupied with Mount Olympus. Does that make any sense? We just lost the challenge by an extremely large margin & you want to keep the person that doesn’t prioritize this game? Go to sleep Toby, you’re drunk. I guess it’s hard to judge who will be more active since it’s only round uno. Dani was present, but only sent in one thing…& Brian had internet problems. I had a great conversation with Dani the first day, but it’s day three now. Should I stick my neck out for him? I told Toby what he wanted to hear because it was 3AM for him & he wanted to sleep, but there’s still a lot of time left & I want Brian dead.

I need to talk to people more often hn

I mean this vote is as simple as it gets, it's basically a battle of which inactive should we kick. Most votes seem to be going on brian, which I do feel bad about cuz I love him in mount Olympus and feel he could easily be a number to drag. but at the same time he's been so inactive to the point where he'll probs just die at a swap or something. I feel bad for toby since he already voted dani but im sure he'd understand with all the timezone differences, I would like dani to go but if brian stayed, we would probs lose again then he would just leave so rip

Hi!! It's me john coffey!!! So I love the theme of my tribe being like  the emotional players and I love the vibe of all my tribemates. However I know that the emotional players are also sometimes the messiest players because I forsure fall into that category sometimes!! So far I have just been trying to chill tf out and get to know people, and use the scavenger hunt to show that I really want to be here. I may not have as much to offer in future tribe challenges so I like being able to use scavenger hunts to really go ham. I got the highest score on our tribe and I think the second highest behind Roxy so woo! Now let's move on to my fellow tribe mates. Kori - the only person I was familiar with going into this game. I played with him in my most recent game where he witnessed me win. We had a good bond the entire game but he also voted for me when he thought I was the majority vote, setting aside any connection I had made with him, so that is always kinda going to be on my mind in this game. But as of now he is the person I trust the most. Andrea - I LOVE her! We bonded quickly over being messes so that's always fun. I could see myself growing close with her in this game. Loris- I really like him, I always like British guys LOL it's been kinda difficult getting to talk to him at a time that works for both of us but I really like him so far Emma- she hosted me a few years ago though I didn't know it was her at first, I like her but haven talked to her as much as the others Big z - I like him though we haven't talked too much but I immediately see him as my biggest threat at this point. Just something about him idk.

As far as other tribe members go - drew Heuser is one of my favorite people to have played orgs with. He was the reason I was first boot in my first Tumblr game but has remained a dear friend of mine ever since. I met him in person and he's the besssst. If I have a chance to play with him I'm excited to see what the outcome will be.

https://youtu.be/TfQ4Xmeb2J8

Brian is voted out 5-1.