#kinda? he's kinda just chilling here not gotta lie

[celtic-crossbow]

Blood Ties Chapter 24

Series Masterlist

Warnings: Poorly written smut; pregnancy hormones absolutely get a warning

A/N: I kinda love this chapter.

There was a chill in the house without a fire being burned overnight. Too many walkers made the light a liability. You had your leggings and a pair of sweats, a long sleeve shirt and a sweater, your two pairs of socks, and your jacket. Carol was going to sleep next to you while Daryl took his turn on watch that night. The woman was the complete opposite of your partner. She was a human icebox. “Jesus, Carol, your hands are freezing!” You could feel the frigid skin beneath the fabric of her gloves. “Here, put them inside my coat.” She was shaking her head even as you guided her hands under either of your arms, shivering from the sudden cold where you were much warmer. Maybe you’d tell Daryl she was staying next to you when he came to lie down. Sure, he’d grumble and groan, but he’d never let Carol freeze.

“Thank you.” The other woman sighed, moving a little closer to you. The archer had tucked the blankets around you before you had invited Carol to share.

“You’re welcome. Do you have enough of the blanket?” She nodded and snuggled against you, full on laughing when the baby gave her a swift punch to the midsection. “Yeah, sorry. Thumper is lively tonight.” You twisted your head around as far as you could manage to ensure no one had been disturbed.

“Don’t apologize. Probably just knows I’m not daddy and isn’t happy about that.”

She was absolutely right. At 34 weeks, the baby seemed to sense when Daryl was around, just as he seemed to know just when to put his hand over the swell to calm them. Moving from place to place was getting harder and harder for you. The groups of walkers seemed to be everywhere, each town full of the people who had tried to persevere, only to become one of the dead. Sometimes you would find a place, settle in, only to run two hours later. You were exhausted, physically and mentally, and Thumper could feel it. The baby would move relentlessly, only adding fuel to your anxiety and making rest impossible.

Until Daryl would intervene. 

It started the same night he had first taken the weight of the baby for you. 

Daryl stood there with you for at least an hour, bracing you against him and giving your bones and muscles a well deserved break. When he began to tire, he simply walked backwards to lean against the wall. It wasn’t until you were nearly falling asleep, he scooped you up and carried you to the bedroll, an extra blanket on top of it to give your body some support. He was expected to take watch soon but they would come collect him when it was time. So he crawled under another blanket with you, molding himself around your back, still without a single word. You were warm and felt safe, but once you had tried to sleep, Thumper became restless; rolling and kicking until you were nearly sobbing with exhaustion.

“Baby, please, mama’s so tired. Please, just—”

“Listen, kid.” You had barely registered that Daryl had moved at all, holding himself up on one hand while he leaned over your side, the other hand planted firmly on your round abdomen. The tone he used was one you hadn’t heard from him before: soft but serious, no nonsense but comforting. “Ya gotta give your mama a break. World ain’t great out here right now, an’ she needs to sleep. I promise ya ain’t gotta be scared or—or nervous. M’gonna make sure you an’ your mama are safe.” You didn’t say anything, didn’t move, barely breathed. While the baby didn’t go still, the movements calmed to flutters and ripples. “There ya go.” When he started to lie back, he caught the look on your face and flushed, ducking his head. “Book says they can hear ya. Thought it might help.”

His damn books. You could kick yourself for how frustrated you’d get with him when he only ever used the knowledge for your benefit. “It did. My god, you’re the baby whisperer.” You smiled, snuggling against him. “You’re gonna be the best daddy, Daryl. I hope you know that.” You were met with nothing more than his breath against the back of your neck. “I love you.” There was a flex of his fingers on your stomach, proving he was awake. You never said it with the expectation of him saying it back. It was simply part of your process to continue reassuring him that this was his family. He had a partner and a child, both who adored him. With your hand on top of his, the three of you slept.

No one woke him for watch.

He talked to the baby constantly now. Not one of those dads that used your bump as a pillow and had full conversations with the fetus, but would check in, let the baby know what he was doing. Whether a boy or a girl, Thumper definitely already favored their daddy. That was something with which you were fine. You wanted their relationship to be special. You weren’t afraid of not bonding with your child, but worried that Daryl feared he would never do so himself. That he might even let that fear sabotage him. 

As if keeping time inside your womb, the strong movements intensified, Thumper now expecting the presence of their father; demanding it, even. With a sigh, you opened your eyes. Carol wasn’t asleep, but smiling tenderly, finally having found some warmth even if it meant cage fighting with your unborn child. 

“S’this?” Came a rough whisper from above. You simply rolled your head to meet Daryl’s curious gaze and caught Carol’s elbow when she immediately tried to remove herself from the equation. 

“Carol’s cold and Thumper says you’re late.” To the other woman, the archer probably looked angry but you knew that look. The furrowed brow and squinted eyes. 

“Well, ya gonna make room or what?”

He didn’t like the idea of Carol in his space. He didn't need to vocalize that, and he didn’t. Carol removed herself almost completely but didn’t attempt to find somewhere when she found you watching her. You knew she’d try if only to ease Daryl’s discomfort. You weren’t thrilled that he’d be ill at ease but Carol needed to be warm and the man was literally a walking fireplace. You’d be between them, looking at him, while the three of you shared warmth. 

It took a good amount of effort—and Daryl’s assistance—for you to roll over. The woman now at your back was whispering apologies at not being the one to move when you waved a hand at her. 

“Just lay down, Carol.” You laughed as quietly as you could manage. “Snuggle as close as you can to me, okay?” Her blue eyes lifted to Daryl, now propped on his elbow in front of you. He gave her a nod before you felt the blankets being arranged and her front against your back. Her presence didn’t bother you at all. And you could have told her that Daryl would have never let her lie where he was anyway. It would mean there was a door behind you and he never let there be a way for a threat to get you without going through him. You were too tired and ready to snuggle into a warm chest. You could tell her the next day. When everyone was settled and still, you smiled tiredly at him. “Hi.”

He didn’t get to answer before practically your entire stomach shifted with Thumper’s movement. “S’like watching a fuckin’ alien movie.” Daryl grunted, fingers working down the zipper of your jacket enough to slip his hand inside and splay his fingers open across your belly. 

“Don’t say that.” You whined. Your nightmares had been plagued with imagery of a walker baby gnawing its way from your womb. You hadn’t told him about the dreams, didn’t want to put the idea in his head that it was even a possibility. True to Dixon form, however, he surprised you.

“I think ‘bout it too.” He whispered, his hand gliding back over forth over your abdomen. “Wouldn’t be no heartbeat when Hershel checks ‘em though an’ s’there. Everyday.” You sighed deeply, smiling like a lovesick idiot and snuggling against his chest while your baby already began to settle beneath his palm. “What?”

“Just thanking my lucky stars, as my daddy would suggest at this moment.” 

Daryl snorted. “What for?”

Carol shifted at your back and hummed in her sleep, her body already warm against you. “You. Thumper. This little family.” You wanted to be closer to him but without crawling under his skin, it wouldn’t be possible. And yet you were wrong. Daryl moved, angling his hip toward you so the weight of the baby could rest on him instead of pulling toward the floor. From that position, you were able to press almost flatly against his chest in complete relaxation. “Goddamnit, Daryl Dixon, I fucking love you.”

He hummed, nuzzling his cheek against your head. “So ya keep sayin’.”

“And I’ll keep saying it, too. Get used to it.”

Another day, another drive. It was cold. The breeze from Daryl’s window wasn’t helping anything, but you dared not speak it. Even with the ventilation, all you could smell was the burning tobacco. Why the man would be smoking after pneumonia nearly killed him was something you probably would never understand. Regardless, he was considerate about it. He always made sure the smoke was never blowing in your direction. It wasn’t even something that you found unappealing. Quite the opposite. Daryl made smoking look like less of a habit and more of something that was just a natural part of him. Even with your super senses, the smell didn’t bother you. It never had.

And it wasn’t bothering you at the moment either, but that didn’t matter. He was. 

“You realize that you nearly drowned from fluid in your lungs just a few weeks ago, right?” It was a jab, unnecessary and was meant to make you feel better, but couldn’t have been further away from that result. Absolutely no one would have missed the way he clenched his jaw, barely relaxing it enough for the next drag.

“Ya realize that bein’ pregnant ain’t a excuse to be a bitch all’a the time, right?” There was an immediate spasm of regret in his expression, his hand tightening on the wheel. “Didn’t mean that. M’sorry.” Kudos to Daryl for not holding in an apology after snapping, even if the apology wasn’t need because he was 100% correct. You slumped down in the seat. One hand rubbed your itchy belly while the other reached for his forearm and squeezed it gently until his grip loosened. 

“Don’t apologize. I deserved that.” You knew full well that you were being unbearable, even if it was something beyond your control at points. You had laid into the poor man for commenting that he should go through the bags and grab you a larger sweater because you looked uncomfortable in the one that now had to stretch to accommodate the changes in your body. He hadn’t argued when you called him an inconsiderate dick and spewed off anger and insults that you couldn’t even recall.

“Nah.” He flicked the cigarette out the window. “Don’t ever deserve me or anyone else talkin’ to ya like that, pregnant or not.” Those pretty blue eyes were catching the sun just right to give them a crystal shine as he watched the road. You didn’t miss the way they flitted down to your hand still on his arm, nor did you miss his left hand start to move toward it but retract. 

You gave him a smile, one that he began to fidget underneath. With a jerk upward of his arm, he prompted you to let go. You didn’t want to make him uncomfortable so you looked away, picking absently at the front of the oversized sweater he had dug out for you regardless of your tantrum.

Five and a half weeks left before you’d be roughly around forty weeks, which meant you could safely go into labor after the next week or so. While you were thrilled at the prospect of meeting Thumper, you were terrified of giving birth. So much could go wrong and there just wasn't the available equipment to ensure either comfort or safety. The thought of battling through without even the option of pain relief was daunting. You’d seen the movies, and though Lori had assured you they were all on the dramatic side, she did warn you that contractions were not still not fun. She refused to go through her birth story, wary of aggravating your nerves even more. She did add that every woman’s body was different and she couldn’t tell you much more than that. 

So what did you do? Naturally, you grabbed up one of Daryl’s books. You had placed it back in his bag after only two pages, fear doubling with anxiety to tag team in constricting your chest. He wasn’t any help, having no time to read lately. He was going by Lori’s advice and what he was learning from your cues. He was doing the best he could and you were thankful for him, even if you didn’t always show it.

Glancing over at him, slouched behind the wheel with his left thumb dragging back and forth over his bottom lip, you felt a pulse between your legs. Even with that god awful poncho, he was so fucking attractive. You’d barely let him touch you recently. He never seemed upset about it, always just pulling you closer after the initial don’t touch me had worn off. He never tried again, never questioned. Just rolling with the punches to ensure you had what you needed.

And at that very moment, your body was screaming that you needed him.

“Daryl.”

“Hmm?” He didn’t look over but your tone was level, seemingly unbothered. 

“I need you to pull over.” You licked your lips but he didn’t notice. Or maybe he did. The man had an eagle eye and an elephant brain. He glanced at you and then back to the road.

“Gotta piss again?”

Charming. “Yeah.” He always went with you now, standing on the other side of the tree so you didn’t feel like he had followed you into the bathroom. If he continued that trend this time, you’d beg him once out of sight and earshot of the group.

“One sec.” He blew the horn once, the signal to the group, and maneuvered the truck to the side of the road, just shy of the ditch. “C’mon then.” He got out and shut his own door but you didn’t move. Just as he knew your routine, you knew his. He rounded the front and opened the door for you, offering his arms to lift you from the seat and place your feet on the ground. There was a bit of strain on his face, but you tried to ignore it. The weight was from pregnancy. It’s the baby, it’s the baby. Don’t think about your weight right now.

“Thank you.” You patted his cheek and placed your hands on the small of your back, pushing your belly outward. “It’s fine.” You chuckled without even looking at him. The door had yet to shut which meant he was watching you instead. “Just stiff. Come on, I really have to pee.” Lie, lie, lie. You really needed his fingers stretching you open, his thumb against your throbbing clit. Maybe his mouth. 

“Jesus, woman. Slow down.” He huffed, having no trouble keeping stride with you. He was, of course, concerned that you’d fall in your haste. You stopped at a large oak, biting your lip with a nod. A glance back revealed the group was beyond visibility, but you’d have to be quiet. That was going to be difficult with how wound up you were. “G’on. I’ll be right here.” His back was already against the rough bark. You were suddenly reminded of the bite against your skin the day he came inside you for the first time.

Daryl reached for his knife, intent on toying with it, cleaning from underneath his nails with the sharp tip but your hand halted him from even unlatching the sheath. With a frown, he looked you over. You watched the slow process toward realization.

“Don’t really need to piss, do ya?”

“No.” You were already dragging your sweats and leggings down to your knees, taking hold of his wrist and all but slapping his hand against your damp panties. “Please.” Using your grip to hold him still, you ground your hips down for friction that would surely bring some sense of relief. “Please, Daryl.” With a sigh, he stepped forward and turned you so that your back was against his chest. He must have been feeling frustrated. How many times had you nearly had his digits slipping inside you before your body changed its mind? God, your poor partner likely had balls as blue as his eyes.

“S’alright. Y’should know by now that I’ll do whatever it is thatcha need.” And then he was pushing your underwear down one-handed and his middle finger was dipping into your entrance, your body clenching around the intrusion before it began to pulse and pull him deeper. “Fuck.” Daryl dropped his forehead to the back of your head with a groan. You were nearly dripping but this time, the burning ache for his touch wasn’t going away.

“Please.” You said again, rolling your hips, letting out a squeak when your clit pressed into the heel of his hand. “I swear it won’t take long. I just—dear god, I need you.” 

“I gotcha.” He whispered into your hair, pumping the digit in and out of your greedy cunt a mere three times before stretching you further with his index finger. The wet sounds accompanying his ministrations were absolutely filthy. “Christ, Y/N.” He was growing hard against your ass, the press of him against you nearly toppling you over the edge then and there.

“No.”

Another sigh from behind you and he was withdrawing with a gentle kiss to the back of your neck. “Better get back. They’re probably already—” The look on his face would have been hilarious if you weren't vibrating with a carnal need for him. It took all of three seconds for you to work open his pants and pull him free. There was a delectable hiss that you wanted to snatch with your teeth and bite into as if it were a living thing. Daryl’s hand shot out to brace himself against the tree as you fervently stroked him. 

“This. I need this.” You were absolutely going to implode if he didn’t touch you soon. Time was limited. Rick would bring Glenn and T-Dog to search for the pair of you if you took too long. It was time to see if Daryl was even capable of a quickie. He’d always somehow managed to fuck you for what felt like hours. You spun and placed your hands against the tree trunk, jutting out your ass, your hip bumping into the head of his cock. The moment his hand squeezed just one hip, you knew you’d need to hold on tight.

One thrust and he was bottomed out, the stretch of it painful and exquisite. Just what you needed. He wasted no time, pounding into you like his life depended on it. He was likely wound just as tight as you were. You had never been intentionally teasing him, just reacting to the will of your indecisive, hormonal body.

Thank god that same body was craving what he was giving you. 

His left hand slid around to support your belly, ever considerate of your comfort despite the frenzied state of his mind in that moment. Your clit was throbbing, begging for pressure and friction that you granted yourself for once as he skillfully plunged in and out of you, the head of him tapping that soft spot inside you that had you rising onto your tiptoes and bending as far as you could manage to open yourself up for him.

Daryl growled, an almost feral sound from deep within his chest, his thrusts growing sloppy. He was close but you were closer, already seeing stars with each stroke of your fingers. You continued to get lost in the way he was making you feel, forgetting to keep your own rhythm going. Fuck. He was going to throw you off the precipice without the need for your aid. “Right there! Oh god, Daryl—I’m gonna—”

“Ssh!” He released your hip in favor of bowing over your back to cover your mouth. He knew you too well. When his teeth bit down just to the right of your spine to muffle his own exclamations, you fell apart. Your walls clamped down on him, pulsing and squeezing until he shouted against your flesh, his hips stuttering against your ass. There was a rush of warmth inside you, welcomed and satisfying. After the spasms slowed in their intensity, Daryl gently, lazily thrust into you a few more times to ensure you rode every single wave. He didn’t slip out of you until you slouched with a contented sigh.

“God, I needed that.” You hummed as he pulled up your panties and leggings, adjusting them to be comfortable before doing the same with your sweats. “Thank you.” You whispered breathlessly, turning to face him as he tucked himself away.

“Ain’t never gotta thank me for somethin’ that’s yours, crazy girl.” The archer froze in the middle of securing his belt, staring at the ground somewhere between your boots and his. You found yourself unable to move as well, just blinking at him, wondering if that meant what you thought it did. His head was down but you could see him glancing back and forth between you and the dirt. When his hands released the leather, his right one circling your wrist, you held your breath. “Y/N —I, uh—”

“Hey!”

Glenn was one of the sweetest men you’d ever known but at that moment, you had never wanted to murder someone more in your entire life.

“You guys okay?”

Daryl grunted and let you go. “C’mon. I guess, they’re sick’a waitin’.”

You sighed but the words, the expression, the moment kept replaying as you followed him. Was he about to tell you that he loved you? It was such a strange feeling to somehow know that he did but feeling like that was made null by his unwillingness to express it. None of this was easy for him. I love you was something he had likely never heard in a way he could believe, from anyone who hadn’t at some point caused him pain. You’d wait. You’d wait forever if you had to.

They always said actions speak louder than words and his actions were absolutely roaring. You just wanted to hear it. Just once. Just wanted to be able to pluck the words from the air and lock them away in your heart to call back when you needed them during the times he couldn’t say it. 

You were nearly back to the truck when it hit you and you stopped with a heavy sigh that had your partner twisting at the waist to glance back at you. “Ya alright?”

With a wincing smile, you begrudgingly admitted: “I really do have to pee now.”

[jeansplaytoy]

aot people and what dogs they have

this was funnnn , no warnings !!

starting off , i feel like eren would have a french bulldog 😭 he don’t even seem like a big dog typa person (not in the animal way) but he would def name the dog after him like with the same initials or something. like ej (eren jeager) jr.

“ej jr, getcho ass back over here.”

“bruh ej jr ian even playin nomo bruh.”

“junior, why you eat my new…” and take a deep ass breath. “why you eat my new shoes?”

but to be honest he can’t even be mad cus him and the dog act just alike 💀 and i feel like ej jr would be hella nice, just play too much (like eren). like the amount of times this dog has took off down the sidewalk and eren just stood there, sick and tired of the bullshit. he’d definitely be one of those people that would be like “dogs too much to handle” but kept the dog no matter whatttt.

next up is connie, who would prolly have a doberman i’m not even finna lie. like he would want a dog that looks scary, but isn’t actually mean. and that’s specifically his dog.

like he’s trained enough that if connie tells him to attack like for real, that mf gon attack. but he’s trained enough to know if connie just playin or not. but he got it kinda good cus when i say everybody is scared of this boys dog …. it ain’t even funny 💀

everybody is scared of it except for the main group. he gotta keep it in its room (yet it had its own room) for somebody to come over his house.

and i feel like he’d name it like domino or spade (ykyk).

“yo spade come here lil bro!”

“spade go eat yo food, you had me fixing that shit for nun.”

“spade. go in yo room fool.”

he also squares up and play fights wit the dog 😭.

next up is jean. now this mf know he wrong, but he would have one of them tall ass dogs, like a irish wolfhound or sumn.

now this dog is sum else, jeans dog would be hella chill, but taking it out in public? 💀shiddd. everybody staring and looking like a mf and he honestly, HONESTLYYY don’t understand why. people will literally be like “bruh, that dog is huge as fuck.” and he’ll just be like “ion know what y’all be talmout, but ight.” AND IT AINT NO ACT cus he tall too😭.

the dogs name would prolly be clifford, ngl. the only difference is that the dog ain’t red. but other than that, he chill as hellll.

“clifford, stop tryna eat paper and shit!”

“cliff’ you chewed my bottle of water bro.”

“clifford, go. just go sit down, damn.”

there’s really no problems with this dog other than the fact that it’s big, but it’s trained a lot and hella good. like the dog knows to sit down in its normal spot when people come over and not to try to jump on people when they’re standing up, stuff like that.

so ony would probably have a small dog just like eren, and it’d probably be a papillon and lemme tell you, he would literally treat this dog like a princesssss omggg.

buy her clothes, paint her nails, brush and comb her hair, brush her teeth, treats everywhere in the bottom of the pantry. like he’ll treat the dog like his own daughter. he always holds her, she’s trained (kind of), like what else could a dog ask for?

but the namewise, i feel like he’d name his dog princeee, honestly. 😭

“princess, bring yo tiny ass-“

“you hungry, P’?”

“princess get that shit out yo mouth!”

of course he’ll only fuss at the dog if she really being disobedient like the time his bed was covered in toilet paper, like ten rolls.

now speaking of fussing, mikasa will forever get fussed at for buying not one, but two black perro de prasa canarios. when i say this girl don’t give a damn bout walking at night with her hands full at all, even when the dogs ain’t on a leash, they’re trained REALLY good. so when she’s actually scared or nervous about somebody following her, they’ll do exactly what she says. full on barking and then stopping mid bark when she says so.

everybodies scared of her dog (and connie would be jealous because not that many people really care about his when they see hers) but it’s not even on purpose, she just wants them for protection honestly.

their names would probably be bullet and gun. obviously.

“gun, bullet, why is there dog food everywhere?”

“gun, bro stop tryna fight bullet.”

“bullet, stop shaking water everywhere!”

bullet is bullet because he got a lot of energy and gun is gun because he’s more intimidating. like they got the spike collars and all, mikasa was not playing.

last but not least, sasha would have a dog that she could laugh at everyday, like a greyhound.

now honestly her and this dog will argue each other from the minute she wakes up to the minute she goes back to sleep. they would be so on and off. 😭 but she’d dress the dog up and stuff and be really nice to it.

the only thing she’d really laugh at is how skinny the dog looks. but the name would probably be bones.

“bones, stop chewing on my airpods cases!”

“bones, get out. please get out.”

“bones stop scratching meee!”

but she obviously loves her dog cus she’s the type to have it since she was like 16 maybe. and they play fight too but she always ends up losing the fight, and one of her lashes in the process.

let’s not talk about how i fg to put armin, hope u enjoyed.

[beeelderly]

"You're drunk, and this is a party, and when we die, people will remember the good things that we did."

transcript by robotchangeling below the cut!

Ali: I would like to text Jesset the face_with_spiral_eyes. [Keith chuckles] Face with spiral eyes.

Austin: Oh, damn. Right, the like, you're—

Keith: That’s actually the title of a Breka book. [Ali laughs]

Austin: Yeah, yeah, that one. The one that you've now just posted. Yeah. Ooh, what’s the response here?

Keith: The Face With Spiral Eyes.

Austin: What’s the response? Uh, I'm looking at my emoji. I'm looking at my emoji. I should not just focus on these emoji. We can invent our own. We’re from the future.

Ali: Yeah.

Austin: And maybe it’s just— it’s one of these, the face exhaling, you know? 

Ali: [laughs] Yeah.

Austin: Like, phew.

Keith: Oh. I thought that was sad tired guy eating the rest of his cotton candy is what I thought that was.

Ali: No, you did not think that. Anyway. 

Austin: You didn't think—

Sylvia: You didn't.

Austin: That’s a lie.

Sylvia: Come on. [Keith and Ali laugh]

Austin: That’s not true.

Ali: I think Brnine sees that and laughs and, like, [Austin: Mm-hmm.] looks up from their phone. [laughs] 

Austin: Oh, right, because you're both at the party, right?

Keith: Yeah, like, looking around.

Ali: Just, like, to find Jesset.

Austin: Uh huh. Yeah. Are you still surrounded by people, or is that…like, what’s the…?

Ali: I mean, this is…this is…

Austin: Wind down.

Ali: This is hour four, hour five of the party.

Austin: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Ali: You know?

Austin: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think texts…I mean, are you still— you're not surrounded by people then, so yeah, I think maybe he just comes over then, finally, and just sits down and is like:

(as Jesset): Done holding court.

Ali (as Brnine): Yep.

Dre: Damn.

Austin (as Jesset): You got all that interview practice, and now you're using it on us.

Ali (as Brnine): [sighs] Ha ha ha ha. Yeah, what’s up?

Austin (as Jesset): How are you?

Ali (as Brnine): I'm chilling, man.

Austin (as Jesset): Bontive Valley.

Ali (as Brnine): Hear, hear, hear.

Austin (as Jesset): What’s next for Captain Brnine?

Ali (as Brnine): Oh, I don't know. I don't know. I gotta ask my crew, I guess. You good, man? I heard that you were, um… [Jesset sighs] I heard you kinda went through it while I was…

Austin (as Jesset): Yeah. Yeah. Uh, faced down Crusade a little early.

Ali (as Brnine): Oh, you softened them up for us.

Austin (as Jesset): [laughs softly] I'll take the W.

Ali (as Brnine): [laughs] Well, thank you.

Austin (as Jesset): Thank you for getting the, uh, that big Divine involved. I don't think we could have done it without them.

Ali (as Brnine): Oh, right, yeah, Fealty and them.

Austin (as Jesset): Yeah.

Ali (as Brnine): Gotta get some Ws.

Austin (as Jesset): Um, I did think I was going to die, though, and that made me think about some things.

Ali (as Brnine): Yeah. Yeah. Same, bro. [Ali laughs quietly]

Austin (as Jesset): Yeah. Pshh, I try not to think about the ones that— you know, we've lost some people over the years.

Ali (as Brnine): Mm-hmm.

Austin (as Jesset): What do you think people would say about me— ah, don't worry about it. Uh…

Ali (as Brnine): Wait.

Austin (as Jesset): Don't worry about it.

Ali (as Brnine): Like, if you died, or like…?

Austin (as Jesset): Yeah, if I died.

Ali (as Brnine): You can't ask somebody that. [muffled laughter] Why are you— come on, man. Don't think like that. What are you doing?

Austin (as Jesset): Sorry, I've had too much to drink. 

Ali (as Brnine): Yeah.

Austin (as Jesset): I should just…

Ali (as Brnine): You’ve been doing this for a long time.

Austin (as Jesset): I might have been doing it for too long. I, uh…Partizan. Phew.

Ali (as Brnine): [laughs quietly] Yeah.

Austin (as Jesset): It seems so far away.

Ali (as Brnine): Yeah. Yeah. I've been, uh…it’s funny. I've been thinking that as well.

Austin (as Jesset): Do you— [cuts himself off] Good luck on the next mission.

Ali (as Brnine): No, what were you gonna say?

Austin (as Jesset): It’s fine. I should talk to you when I'm not drunk. [Ali laughs]

Ali (as Brnine): Okay. I think they still got some, uh…

Ali: I can't think of a food. [laughs] 

Austin: Churros. Uh…

Keith: Cotton candy.

Dre: Shrimp.

Austin: Cotton candy. Shrimp. Ugh. These are all bad drunk foods. [Ali laughs]

Dre: Well, popcorn shrimp? I don't know.

Austin: Popcorn shrimp.

Janine: Cotton candied shrimp.

Dre: Ugh.

Austin: Cotton candied shrimp. Blech!

Keith: Cotton candied shrimp.

Austin: [laughs] I don't know about that.

Ali: Ugghhh.

Dre: Hey, I hate it.

Janine: It’s, like, furry and sweet.

Austin: Right.

Dre: No. [Austin and Keith laugh]

Ali (as Brnine): Go get some bread. 

Austin: Bread is the thing.

Ali (as Brnine): Go get your bread up.

Austin (as Jesset): Go get my bread up. [laughs] You know I keep my bread up. 

Janine: [laughs] What the fuck?

Ali (as Brnine): I know you keep your bread up.

Austin (as Jesset): Keep my bread up every day. Every day!

Ali (as Brnine): That’s what they would say.

Austin (as Jesset): That is what they would say. [Sylvia laughs]

Janine: Uh…

Ali (as Brnine): Jesset always kept his bread up.

Austin (as Jesset): That’s what they would say. [laughs] I always kept my bread up. Ugh, rise and grind. 

Keith: Like the dough.

Dre: Sure.

Keith: Like the dough of the bread.

Austin: Like the dough.

Keith: Rise and grind.

Dre: The Millennium Break mindset. Rise and grind, baby.

Austin: Yeah, that’s right. Ugh.

Austin (as Jesset): [sighs] There are people we lost, and no one even says their names anymore. That’s what’s on my mind. And when it’s done, I don't know if anyone will remember any of us, and it might be our fault because we don't do a good enough job of remembering the people who brought us here. That’s what’s on my mind.

Ali (as Brnine): Well, you're drunk.

Austin (as Jesset): Also some other stuff, but yeah.

Ali (as Brnine): Um, you're drunk, and this is a party, and when we die, people will remember the good things that we did.

Austin (as Jesset): Mm-hmm.

Keith: Eventually we'll have Phrygian’s funeral. [Ali laughs]

Austin (as Jesset): Ah, fuck. We have to have Phrygian’s funeral.

Dre: Oh, man!

Austin (as Jesset): Oh.

Ali (as Brnine): I thought that that happened already, but we should have that.

Austin (as Jesset): We should have that. Do you— oh. There hasn't really been time for funerals. I don't know that I've been to one since Partizan.

Ali (as Brnine): [laughs] Oh, right. Ugh, god. No, I— we just— I just did that— [laughs] You want to hear something funny? [Dre laughs]

Austin (as Jesset): Yeah. 

Ali (as Brnine): Cori. 

Austin (as Jesset): Cori.

Ali (as Brnine): You know Cori, little Sunset?

Austin (as Jesset): Uh, pink hair. [Sylvia laughs]

Ali (as Brnine): She threw a punch at her dad’s funeral.

Austin (as Jesset): She threw punch at her—? She threw a punch.

Ali (as Brnine): No, she punched somebody.

Austin (as Jesset): Who’d she punch?

Ali (as Brnine): I don't know. 

Austin (as Jesset): Oh.

Ali (as Brnine): Some girl, I think.

Austin (as Jesset): Mm. [Sylvia laughs loudly]

Ali (as Brnine): You know, she might— [laughs] she might end up like me one day.

Austin (as Jesset): I could see it.

Ali (as Brnine): It’s a good start.

Austin (as Jesset): Her own ship?

Keith: Iridescent.

Austin (as Jesset): You don't need an engineer on board, do you?

Ali (as Brnine): Wait.

Austin (as Jesset): Ah…no, it’s…you know, I always told myself the Bontive Valley was the thing, and I guess we're gonna try for other stuff. Shale Belt, Carleon, Temple. I don't know what’s next, but it seems really far away, and I've been in the caves and the mountains for a few years now. You know, I should just stay. They probably need me, but…and you already have other things going on, but. [quiet conflicted laugh]

Ali (as Brnine): Um, you know, that’s a lot to consider.

Austin (as Jesset): It is.

Ali (as Brnine): Um…

Austin (as Jesset): I'm sorry. I'm gonna get bread.

Ali (as Brnine): No. Yeah, sure. I'll text you in the morning.

Austin (as Jesset): Yeah.

Ali (as Brnine): Okay.

Austin: Stands up, hands on knees. Hands on log. I've been picturing us sitting on a log around a bonfire. You know, like, you know, like a bonfire.

Ali: Yeah.

Austin: Push up. Little nod. Slow walk away. Later that night, texts you an emoji of bread. 

Ali: [laughs] Cool.

Austin: Uh huh.

Ali: Oh how this relationship would be if they didn't talk to each other when they were drunk or sick all of the time.

Austin: Mm. Mm. Mm. Perfect. Love it. [Ali laughs]

Dre: Mm.

Sylvia: That’s what makes it the situationship.

Austin: Yep. [Ali laughs]

Dre: Yeah.

Austin: Mm-hmm.

Sylvia: Yeah. At least in my experience.

Ali: Hey, can I move in with you? Wait, nevermind. I gotta go.

Austin: Nevermind. I'm gonna go get some bread instead. [Ali laughs]

Sylvia: Oh my god.

Austin: It’s fine.

Dre: Man.

Austin: Uh huh.

Ali: We've all been there. [Austin laughs]

Sylvia: Yeah.

Dre: College, am I right? [laughter] 

Austin: College, phew, yeah. [Dre laughs]

Keith: Jesset picks up some corn just to drop it.Austin: Yeah, that’s how it feels sometimes. [Ali laughs]

[opossumloverr]

✞°•I DON'T BELIEVE IN GHOSTS•°✞

(Based on this song, I know you know this song. don't lie to me)

Summary:

Turtle bros with a ghost reader!

Warning(s):

Some cursing!

A/N:

I MUST BE DREAMING CAUSE I DON'T BELIEVE IN GHOST YEAH, sorry, anyways, idk I just felt a little silly today, and I really do love this song. also I'm trying a different style DONT BULLY ME IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO DO GRADIENT

It was a chilly October night, the leaves rustled as the four brothers made their way towards an abandoned graveyard. The atmosphere was dark and gloomy, but they were determined to explore the area, for reasons unknown to anyone but themselves.

"I don't like this, guys. Let's turn back," the youngest brother, Mikey, shivered.

"What? No way! You said you were bored, Mikey. This is exactly what we need to get our blood pumping!" another brother exclaimed.

"He was bored, Leo, not us. You didn't have to drag us all here," one of the brothers groaned in annoyance.

"Sorry that Mr. Bootyshaker9000 wanted to stay indoors and rot. I'm preventing the inevitable!" Leo clapped back.

"I'm trying to prevent hitting you with my Tech Bo," Donnie gripped his weapon tighter.

"Try it, you won't," Leo egged Donnie on.

"You little…" Donnie scowled, lifting his weapon before getting interrupted.

"Enough! Fighting is not the memo right now! Now you two cut it out or else I'll…wait, what was that?" the oldest brother paused on his scolding to scope out the area. A pungent smell of perfume floated in the air, and chills went down their spines.

"I'm getting really bad vibes here! I told you we should've gone back to the lair!" Mikey exclaimed.

"Don't be such a party pooper, Mike! It's probably all in our heads," Leo tried to come up with a reasonable explanation, but a gust of wind shut off all of his thoughts.

"What was that?!" Raph exclaimed.

"It's a ghost!" Mikey chattered.

"That is preposterous, Michael. There is no such thing as a ghost-"

"No, he's right."

They all screamed in unison, clinging onto Raph. "AH!"

《RAPH》

After the shock and some failed punching attempts, he finally decided to talk instead of fight, and it was a delightful conversation

yall sat down and talked for hours, He asked a few questions, and you answered them

he made sure not to ask personal questions, like how you died and stuff (unlike Donnie, that insensitive prick)

was kinda sad when he had to go, but gotta make sure pops doesn't worry,

he promises he'll see you again

a few weeks later you show up in his room, sitting down calmly on his bed, or, erm, floating.

he threw multiple items at you before calming down and realizing that it was you, what were you doing here? how did you know where he lives?

all of those questions were brushed off when he heard that you just wanted to see him, and only him.

his heart pounded in his plastron, you wanted to see him? big ol' him? cue huge tail thumping into the ground

yall talked for HOURS, him talking about Lou Jitsu- wait, you've never watched Lou Jitsu? he's inviting you to family movie night. there's no getting out of this.

over the months, the both of you got close, he no longer throws objects or tries to throw hands when he sees you!

enjoys the company when he lifts weights

"Wow, those seem heavy," you said, impressed by his muscles as he lifted the weights. 

"They are heavy, but don't worry, Raph's got gains!" he replied, flexing his muscles with a curl-up. 

"Can I try?" you asked, reaching out your hands. 

"Sure, but be careful. I'll be here to spot ya!" he said, passing the weights to you. 

However, you forgot that you were transparent and accidentally dropped the weights on his tail, causing him to scream in pain. 

"Oops! I forget I'm transparent sometimes... You just make me feel so alive..." you said sheepishly. 

"I-I make you feel alive?" he questioned, seemingly forgetting the intense pain in his tail.

HES SOSOSO SILLY GUYS I CAN'T

《LEO》

He had never sliced a portal open this fast

before he could dive head-first into his portal you floated in front of it

you just wanted to talk... okay... but he's keeping a close eye on you

a few minutes later he's blabbing about Jupiter Jim to you, you've never watched it? what? do you live under a rock? or... a grave...

and you seem so interested! he could talk about it for hours! you know he could.

he literally clung onto the ground when it was time to leave, complaining as Raph dragged him away

he shouted a quick "See you soon"

he saw you soon alright, in his room, looking at his pile of Jupiter Jim comics curiously

He literally screamed like a girl

Oh! it's just you... where did you come from? oh, you just wanted to see him, not his brothers? him?

boosts up his ego by 100x

"I knew you couldn't get enough of me" type of energy

proceeds to yap about Jupiter Jim some more, what? it's YOUR fault for indulging in his hyperfixations

yall are the talker and listener duo

"And so Jupiter Jim was all like- pew pew pew! and the aliens were all like- Ohno! and then- hey, hey [NAME], are ya listening?" He questioned,

"Mhm, go on, I'm all ears"

Leo's eyes widened, and small churrs could be heard "OKOK! And then Jupiter Jim was all like, no way jose!"

He just like me fr

《DONNIE》

There is no logical way this could be happening! ghosts? really?

immediately started asking questions, why do you exist? how do you exist? would you perhaps be interested in some experiments, y'know, for scientific purposes (definitely not for his own personal questions)

his questions just kept on coming and coming, some of them being more insensitive than the last, he would've said more if Raph didn't smack him on top of the head...

but you were happy to answer them non the less

when they had to skedaddle he was pissed, how dare they interrupt! can't you see there was science in the making?

he says he'll come to you, for more questions of course, nothing more... (cap)

he didn't expect you to come to him.

he jumped a little but then started going into his "I ask you, answer" mode

Experiments on you (with consent ofc)

discovers you have telekinesis

you two grew close, his experiments died down the more he learned about you

now, he just really enjoys the company

just knowing that you're there watching him while he tackles a project gets him so motivated

you're like his little assistant

"[NAME], be a dear and pass me that wrench over there," he asks, hand out, palm open,

"You got it boss" you floated the wrench toward him, and he grabbed it

"Thank you, you really are a great help, [NAME]"

"Just glad to be here Don-tron!" you smiled, not noticing the slight wag to his tail.

He really appreciates you

《MIKEY》

He just kept screaming and screaming until you snapped him out of it

what? why aren't you trying to take his body? and why aren't you freakishly creepy, you just looked like a normal person, minus the floating and transparency

Oh, you just wanted to talk? well, as long as you don't possess his body he's all for it!

The conversation was amazing! he got so much more information about ghosts, he's even more fixated on them now!

you got this turtle laying on the ground, twirling his mask tails in his fingers, kicking his feet, saying "Ooh! Tell me more!"

was whining like a puppy dog when he had to get up on out of there, puppy dog eyes did not work in his favor tonight..

he swears up and down that he will visit you, just wait!

I guess you've waited long enough, because the following week you were caught snooping around his room

he screamed, yes, he won't lie.

but it's not his fault that you popped up out of nowhere!

then starts talking to you like he didn't scream like 100 decibels

Just yip yap yapping away, but you don't mind, you enjoy socializing with him

kinda sad that he can't touch you though, sometimes he wants nothing more than to wrap his arms around you

you're his muse! asks you to pose for him, and you happily oblige

"Okay just keep that position, right there, perfect! such an amazing muse for me!" He smiles,

"Well, it's easy to pose when I have such a wonderful artist painting me" You replied,

"Awe shucks, don't compliment me like that! you're going to give me an ego" he chirps happily

lala and okok duo. that's all I have to say.

BOO! HAPPY NEW YEARS GUYS OMGOMG 2024 IS HOPEFULLY GONNA BE A GREAT YEAR, HERES A LIL DITTY I WROTE, I HOPE YA LIKE IT, IM GETTING ON MY GRIND RIGHT NOW, I love ya! Merry 24, also I was watching Coryxkenshin while writing, shout out to the shogun. There also MIGHT be some grammar mistakes, kinda rushed to get this out

[pro-mammonologist]

I'm not gonna lie, I can't help but wonder what Mammon would be like with an MC who gets super giggly and kinda spacey when they're drunk (totally not based on me whaaat?)

like if he's sober too, would he feel more protective and make sure they don't run off anywhere? would he entertain their bubbliness and try to prolong it? does he just get super soft? I gotta know, I would love to get drunk and have my own personal mammon being kinda sweet on me ngl.

anon :)

First and foremost I can’t foresee mammon choosing to not get drunk with Mc but I bet if he did happen to be sober, he’d get a taste of his own medicine. And he would fold. He’s always folding for Mc. That’s normal. This is what I see happening.

Slap! “Oops!” You said as you accidentally knocked a textbook onto Mammon’s floor.

“Hey! Hey!!! Watch out! You’re gonna have to clean that!” Mammon chastised you watching you giggle at him.

“It’s book, I can just pick it up!” You bent over in front of him and jokingly wiggled your backside in front of him.

He sighed tiredly, patting it softly. “Uh huh, there ya go.” You giggled again, touching your butt as though it was sacred now. “Man, I am never getting human world alcohol again.”

You spun around and landed right back on the couch with Mammon. Your body smacked right onto his lap and he winced in pain. “Sorry baby.” You said, flipping around to look up at him.

“Damn watch out, Mc. That kinda hurt!” He sucked his teeth as you stared at him, looking at the one enlarged pore on his chin, that he seemingly was unaware of.

You poked it. “Boop.” And broke out into laughter. Mammon groaned again and you reached for the bottle. Before you could wrap your hand around it, he snatched it away.

“No more!”

You were still giggling, pretending to be a baby in crib reaching for the wine bottle Mammon stretched out of your reach. “Waah! Waah!” He looked absolutely exhausted but he couldn’t help but smile at your dumb little impression.

“Come on ya big baby, this is for adults only!” He used his free hand to pinch your cheek making you smack his hand away, but after his fingers left your flesh, you took both hands and grabbed his, looking at his digits. Mammon felt his heart throb as you gazed at his hands so innocently, complete with big eyes and a bigger smile. “You’re cute you know that?” He told you softly, placing the bottle back on the table.

You looked to his eyes before taking a chomp at his fingers.

“Mc! Stop!”

“HahahaHAHAHA!” You were going insane to him. One second you were looking like a puppy now you’re over here acting like a feral dog.

“Jeez, next thing you know, you’re gonna be barkin’ like a dog.” He’s irritated just a little bit but he’s far more entertained by the way you’re going absolutely nuts. It’s unbelievably adorable and it’s also just something he’s not used to from you. Sure, you can be silly, but, man—

“Grrr! Woof woof! Bark!”

He needed to stop giving you ideas. He was laughing with you now, loving how your nose scrunched up with your brows and especially the way you rolled back and forth on his lap. You’re really like a little puppy. Mammon petted your head as you stopped yourself from laughing to breathe. He’s so whipped he doesn’t even know he’s doing it.

“Hey Mc.”

You breathed deeply, closing your eyes. “Mhmm Mammoney? You gonna tell me you got a crush on me???” There you go, making yourself laugh again.

“Listen, chill out… just wanted to say you’re precious.”

You opened your eyes and looked at him. “Like treasure?”

“Like treasure.”

Two things he learned from today:

1. Don’t give Mc alcohol.

2. Please give Mc alcohol.

[enchxanting]

our love is god [ethan landry] pt. 5

read part 4 here || all parts

pairing: ethan landry x fem!reader

warnings: major character death, depictions of murder/suicide

a/n: okay here we get to see the toxic psycho behavior start to come out! this part is so different from the last that it gave me whiplash to write. n e ways hope you like

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Even before I turn over, I can feel Ethan’s eyes on me. 

He grins. “Hey, good morning,”

“Hi,” I say, sitting up against the backboard. “Have you been up very long?” I check the alarm. It’s relatively early still, only 8:15.

“No, no,” he says. “I just didn’t want to wake you. You looked so peaceful.”

There’s an awkward tension between us, neither quite knowing what to do now. Eventually, Ethan clears his throat. “So I, uh, I had a really special time with you last night, and I kinda want to keep hanging out? If you want to, I mean.”

“You mean like, go on some dates?”

“Um, yeah? If that’s cool?”

I don’t know if he’s ever asked a girl out before because he absolutely cannot look me in the eye, but his expression is so sweet that I lean over and gently kiss him. 

“That would be great.”

He smiles, and I almost lose myself in this moment, until I remember the rest of last night. 

“Shit, shit, shit,” I say, untangling myself from his arms. “I gotta go see Tara.”

Ethan frowns. “Wait, why?”

“I have to apologize. She’s all alone right now, Sam left last night.”

“I don’t see why it’s your job to tell her you’re sorry, though,” he says. “She literally slapped you.”

I pull on some discarded jeans and a t-shirt. “It’s more complicated than that,” I sigh. “I don’t want this to become a big thing. Easier to just apologize now, you know?”

He gets up and wraps me in his arms, resting his chin on my shoulder. “Alright. At least let me drive you? It’s too far to walk right now.”

I know that it’s a bad idea to bring Ethan, but the feeling of his arms around me and the faded scent of his cologne is intoxicating. I can’t help but be persuaded.

“Fine, okay,” I say. “Thank you.”

He gives me one more quick kiss on the neck before pulling away to get dressed.

***

Usually, the drive to Tara’s is ten minutes long. Thanks to Ethan’s driving habits, we make it in five.

Pulling up to the house, a wave of nausea and jitters passes through my body. I’m considering turning around until Ethan takes my hand in his. The non-verbal reassurance calms me down, and we walk into the house together.

I’m surprised to find that the door is slightly ajar, deadbolts forgotten without Sam in the house. I know that she’s still gone– her car is missing from the driveway– but my theory is confirmed when I find a note on the kitchen table: 

At gmas. Don’t text. Call when you can have a real conversation -Sam.

“That’s brutal,” Ethan whistles.

“Yeah.” I remember how Sam looked at all of us last night, and it sends chills down my spine. I push it away. “I think I should bring her something.”

Ethan laughs. “Don’t you think that’s over the top?”

I roll my eyes at him. “Oh, whatever. I just want this to work.”

Opening the fridge, I find a bottle of orange juice that Tara once mentioned was her favorite. “Hey, that’ll work.”

Ethan grabs a ceramic cup from the cabinet and hands it to me. “How about making it special? Got any mixers?”

“Like Sam keeps any alcohol in this house,” I scoff, pouring the juice into the cup. “Plus, a mimosa isn’t the best hangover cure.”

“I don’t know… I was thinking something more like this.” He reaches underneath the kitchen sink, pulling out a bottle of drain cleaner. 

I laugh, thinking he's kidding, but he doesn’t crack a smile or put the bottle away. “Come on,” he continues, pulling out an identical cup. “She’ll puke her guts out and you’ll get a little revenge before you apologize.”

He pours in blue liquid and mixes it with equal parts orange juice. I can’t lie, I’m a little horrified. “Don’t be a dick, Ethan, that stuff could kill her.”

He pauses for a second, and I can’t read his expression before his face softens. “You’re right, Y/N. I’m sorry. I didn’t think about that.”

He leans in and kisses me unexpectedly, and even though I’m still weirded out by his suggestion, I melt into him, letting the moment take me.

“Is okay,” I mumble into his mouth. “We gotta go. She’s probably waking up now.”

Without looking, I grab the cup from the table, distracted by Ethan’s eyes raking over me. It feels good to be wanted like this. I smirk at him and turn on my heels. 

He follows me up the stairs, and together we approach Tara’s door. I know she’s in there by the sound of her sleep music playing softly, even though it’s past 9:00 at this point. Tara’s usually an early riser, but I’m willing to bet that the hangover is preventing her from starting her day.

Out of courtesy, I knock gently on her door. “Tara? Are you in there?”

No reply. Not wanting to give up, I turn the knob and let myself in. She’s laying in her bed, facing away from us. “Hey, Tara?”

Tara turns over, and I can tell she’s not happy to see me. “What are you doing here, Y/N? And with… Ethan?”

Even though she’s trying to ice me out, she’s clearly interested in whatever happened between us. I clear my throat. “Yeah. Listen, Tara, I know both of us said a lot of stuff we didn’t mean last night–”

“Did we?” she interrupts. “I don’t know, you seemed pretty fucking sure of yourself when you got in the middle of my family business.”

Her words hurt, and I can feel Ethan shift uncomfortably behind me. “I know. Can we just forget about it?”

I hold out the cup and she eyes me suspiciously. “What, did you spit in this or something?”

“Jesus, Tara, no,” I sigh. “I came to say sorry or whatever. You said it’s your favorite.”

This seems to persuade her. She takes the cup from me, sitting up in her bed. “If this makes me feel better, I’ll consider accepting your apology.”

This makes me smile slightly, and I can see a glint in her eye that tells me she might not be as mad anymore. She lifts the cup to her lips and drinks, and I relax a little, thankful she accepted my peace offering. 

But something is wrong. Really, really wrong.

As soon as she swallows, her face scrunches up. She drops the cup, spilling the contents on her comforter.

“Tara?” I say, “What’s going on?”

She’s hacking now, and I see her start to convulse. I’m full-on panicking now. “Oh my god, Ethan, call 911!”

He’s completely checked out, watching Tara choke. “Fuck, Ethan, just do it!” I scream.

This seems to wake him up, and he grabs his phone from his back pocket. “Jesus, it’s fucking dead!”

This can’t be happening. I take her head in my lap, trying to elevate it so she doesn’t choke, but there’s no use. Tara wheezes and wheezes, then suddenly goes still, blood starting to trickle from her mouth.

I’m frozen. I can’t do anything but stare slack-jawed at Tara’s gaunt face in my lap.

Then it hits me, and I start screaming.

“Oh my god! Fuck, fuck, how could this happen, how could we kill–”

Ethan suddenly slaps his hand over my mouth, frighteningly out of character for him.

“Y/N, stop, please, stop! Someone’s going to hear.” He retracts his hand, and I feel my eyes welling with tears. I’m shaking. 

“Jesus Christ,” I say. “I just killed my best friend.”

We sit in silence for a second until the reality of the situation dawns on me. “Holy fuck, what are we going to tell the cops?”

I can see the cogs in his brain turning, and he stumbles around the room. Suddenly, Ethan stops and picks up a copy of The Bell Jar from Tara’s desk.

“Okay. Now, we did a murder, and that's a crime. But, if this were like a suicide thing…”

“A suicide thing?” I don’t follow.

“I mean, you can do Tara’s handwriting just as well as your own, right?”

I suddenly understand what he’s asking me to do, and the thought makes me sick. But we have no other option. 

I gently lift Tara’s head off of my lap so I can get up and rip out a piece of paper from her half-full history notebook. “Fuck, what do I say?”

Ethan thinks for a second. “We have to tie it back to last year. Make sure to talk about her fight with Sam last night.

It feels impossible, but I force myself to start writing.

Dear world,

You might think what I’ve done is shocking. To me, though, suicide is the obvious answer to the impossible challenge life has given me. 

Though Richie Kirsch and Amber Freeman did not kill me last year, they stole something much more valuable– my will to live. 

The absence of my father and sister, the deaths of some of my closest friends, and then the departure of my mother, all combined, made me realize that there is no one left who really knows me, no one who really cares. 

I can’t live like this any longer, alone and afraid of an enemy who isn’t there. I died knowing that there was no other option for me. I hope you can understand.

Tara

By the time I’m done, I’m shaking so hard that I drop the pen. The page is stained with my tears, but there’s no time to rewrite it.

I collapse on the ground, and Ethan wraps his arms around me. “I know, I know,” he says.  “It’ll be okay. We’ll be okay.”

taglist: @miawastakens

[leansuccubus]

death of our sanity and singular collective braincell; heartsteel fanfic- pt1 - i know your secrets

warnings ⚠️ contains swearing, flirting like how you flirt w your friends, it’s more of a platonic thing really. Friendly bullying, just homies being homies

You created a groupchat

You named the groupchat “🤡🤡🤡”

You: guys.

Settrigh🗿: HEY WHAT’S UP?

You: HI SETT

Settrigh🗿: HI

Settrigh🗿: SO WHAT’S WITH THE CLOWN EMOJIS?

You: that, you’ll find out soon

You: i made a gc because we’re all homies here, and we needed a gc 🥰🥰🥰

You: i also have some interesting…news to share

Settrigh🗿: uh oh you’re scaring me

You: don’t worry sett, it’ll be okay 😁😁😁

Settrigh🗿: ALRIGHT… although something is telling me i probably shouldn’t trust you

Schizophrenia🧑‍🎤🎸🤘😈👹👹👹: spill

Croissante🥐: Hello. I’m here. I’m concerned but slightly intrigued 👀👀👀

Schizophrenia🧑‍🎤🎸🤘😈👹👹👹: the FUCK did they go, they can’t just come in here, say they have to say something AND THEN LEAVE???

G R E E N 🌿: i’m kinda scared too 😳😳😳

Schizophrenia🧑‍🎤🎸🤘😈👹👹👹: you’re always pscared what’s new 🗿

G R E E N🌿: THATS BECAUSE YOU GUYS HAVE AN OBSESSION WITH JUMPSCARING ME, YALL SUCK ☹️

Phel🤫🧏‍♂️: #justiceforezreal

G R E E N🌿: SEE? APHELIOS GETS IT

Croissante🥐: Yeah…

Schizophrenia🧑‍🎤🎸🤘😈👹👹👹: ez. he’s the one who SETS UP THE JUMPSCARES

You: the dye must’ve leaked into his brain and killed all his braincells 💀💀💀

Schizophrenia🧑‍🎤🎸🤘😈👹👹👹: hes a blonde, he already had negative braincells to begin with 💀💀💀

G R E E N🌿: STOP BULLYING ME 😭

You: No.

G R E E N🌿: YES.

G R E E N🌿: DIDN’T YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO TELL US?

Schizophrenia🧑‍🎤🎸🤘😈👹👹👹: if you don’t tell us, i’ll throw a shoe

Phel🤫🧏‍♂️: i’ll throw his other shoe 🫥

Settrigh🗿: that would leave a mark

You: OKOK CHILL

Settrigh: We need to know please 😔😔😔

You: okay so.

You: yall know how i was at the dorm yesterday

You: i’m surprised it didn’t smell like straight cheese and sweat

G R E E N🌿: ARE YOU IMPLYING IT SMELT LIKE GAY CHEESE AND SWEAT

You: WHAT? NO. IM SAYING IT SMELT SURPRISINGLY CLEAN FOR A PLACE 6 SWEATY ADULT MEN LIVE IN

You: when they know basic hygienic 😍😍😍

Schizophrenia🧑‍🎤🎸🤘😈👹👹👹: QUIT YAPPING JUST TELL US WHAT YOU WANTED TO TELL US

Schizophrenia🧑‍🎤🎸🤘😈👹👹👹: YAPOLOGIST FR

Settrigh🗿:

You: CHILL IM MULTITASKING

You: anyways, I was on my way to sett and phel’s room to play some animal crossing bc they’re animal crossing addicts

Settrigh🗿: I’m an animal crossing addict and im not afraid to admit it XD

You: so on the way there, i had to pass ezreal’s room. and i shit you not, i hear him talking to himself

G R E E N🌿: oh lord. not this.

You: oh yes.

You: wanna tell us what you said EZREAL?

G R E E N🌿: nope i think i’ll pass 😃

You: that’s fine, i’ll just say it myself

You: when i walk past ez’s room, i hear him full on simping for lux, begging them gods to let her notice him

Settrigh🗿: WHAT THE HELL XD

Schizophrenia🧑‍🎤🎸🤘😈👹👹👹: jesus christ. i knew ez’s crush on lux was bad, but i didn’t know it was this bad.

G R E E N🌿: STOP NO ITS NOT TRUE

You: YES IT IS.

Settrigh🗿: oh it’s true, why would reader ever lie to us? xd

G R E E N🌿: ITS NOT I SWEAR 😭

Phel🤫🧏‍♂️: we’re never letting you hear the end of this 😭

G R E E N🌿: I HATE YALL 😭😭😭

Settrigh: Aw we love you too <3

Croissante: Lol. Ez gotta be more careful next time

Schizophrenia🧑‍🎤🎸😈🤘👹👹👹: bro’s rizz is in the negatives

Settrigh🗿: bro is in the trenches

Phel🤫🧏‍♂️: bro is tremendously down bad

Schizophrenia🧑‍🎤🎸😈🤘👹👹👹: we’re never letting him live this down are we?

Phel🤫🧏‍♂️: no we are NOT

You: and that’s not even all

You: y’all are so strange istg, the shit i hear whenever i’m over is just insane

Settrigh🗿: THERES MORE???

You: after passing ez’s room and busting nerves from trying not to laugh, i pass k’sante’s room, and the door is WIDE open

Settrigh🗿: uh oh

Croissante🥐: Yeah… uh oh is an understatement

Schizophrenia🧑‍🎤🎸🤘😈👹👹👹: bro is cooked 💀

You: i saw him scrolling on grindr 💀💀💀💀💀

Schizophrenia🧑‍🎤🎸🤘😈👹👹👹: 💀💀💀

Croissante🥐: YOU CAN’T BE SERIOUS 💀

You: DONT ACT INNOCENT

You: I SAW YOU K’SANTE

You: I SAW YOU.

You: YOU EVEN SAID

You: “DAT ASS THO”

Croissante: I DIDN’T THINK ID BE EXPOSED. I DIDNT THINK ANYONE SAW

You: I DID.

Settrigh🗿: Oh god… what else? XD

G R E E N🌿: we’re all curious, don’t leave us hanging 🤷‍♂️

Phel🤫🧏‍♂️: i second this 👀

You: when i FINALLY reach sett and phel’s room…

Phel🤫🧏‍♂️: you’re making it sound like one of those stories old people tell you about how they got to school 😭

G R E E N🌿: “i climbed 2 mountains and walked through the snow” lookin ahh

Schizophrenia🧑‍🎤🎸🤘😈👹👹👹: 💀💀💀

Schizophrenia🧑‍🎤🎸🤘😈👹👹👹: real

You: STFU

You: anyways, what do i hear???

Settrigh🗿: oh god. please no

You: KISSING. NOISES.

You: YALL FR THOUGHT I WOULDN’T HEAR

Phel🤫🧏‍♂️: 😟😟😟

You: y’all have anything to say about that?

Settrigh🗿: READER.

You: yes sett? 🥰

Settrigh🗿: how could you…😔

You: because y’all didn’t invite me to join 😔

Settrigh🗿: you didn’t even ask you bastard

Settrigh🗿: ya snooze ya loose yk

G R E E N🌿: one time i heard them kissing in the laundry machine

Schizophrenia🧑‍🎤🎸🤘😈👹👹👹: same, they were like so loud 💀💀💀

Schizophrenia🧑‍🎤🎸🤘😈👹👹👹: at least sett was, bro sounded like a subaru

G R E E N🌿: LMFAOOO

Croissante🥐: Lol

Mother 🤤🤤🤤: What on Earth did I just come back to?

Mother🤤🤤🤤: I spend a few hours experimenting with samples and check my phone for the time, only to see a hundred notifications. Shouldn’t you guys be cleaning?

Schizophrenia🧑‍🎤🎸🤘😈👹👹👹: RUN. ITS MOTHER. RUN FOR THE HILLS

[jellybeans2099]

A preview

Pairing: Miguel O'Hara x Spiderperson! Reader

Warnings: None

Summary: The reader is a bit of a mess and Miguel is not having it

A/N: I'm working on something kinda related to Release but more fleshed out. Here's a little taste of what I have so far. Let me know if this is something you all would be interested in.

Seeing Miguel for the first time honestly felt like a jump scare. His 6'9 stature and his overall physic made him feel like concrete wall come to life. It was your first real day at HQ after months of saying no thank you to the invite. Peter B was giving you a tour while rambling on about something related to Mayday. It was impressive to say the least, but to say you were impressed by it was a stretch. The architectural choices and overall use of tech was just not really your thing. You gotta give props to it though, seems like a really cool place. Stepping into his lab was almost disorienting and you felt an unexplainable urge to leave. Probably coming from the man taking his sweet ass time getting down to the ground.

"So nice of you to finally join us. We've been trying to get you here for months now, or so I'm told. I don't keep up with this stuff much these days."

When he steps off the platform he isn't even looking at you. You're just another recruit to get on his nerves it seems like. How irritating considering you didn't really wanna join in the first place.

"Yea I gotta say I wasn't super interested in joining but I've got nothing left to loose so I figured why not?" He finally gives you a glance. You can tell your response caught him off guard.

"Ah so this is just something to fill in your free time?"

You see his eyes slowly start to fill with frustration. He thought you weren't taking this seriously and to be honest you weren't. It felt a lot like a fragile man inflating his ego with importance. You wanted to push his buttons just a little bit more.

"Yea in a way I guess it is. Walking around here though, it seems like a real big passion project of yours so I'll say I'm impressed. Still not really my thing with all the tech but it's cool."

You see a tinge of full anger in his eyes and there you have him exactly where you want him, actually paying attention to you like you're not just a speck in his day. As quick as you see it, its gone in a flash. He composes himself and begins to give you the low down on why you're here. This is how things will be with Miguel for the rest of your time here, you pushing all of his buttons and him trying to suppress any reaction to keep his "cool". 

The next few times you arrive at HQ for a mission you make a point not to see him. Dismissing any briefings to a simple 3 paragraph message in some database while chilling at home in your own universe. You honestly couldn't care less about the happenings there, not when so many things in your own universe needed attending to. Which is total the lie you tell when you ping home instead at the end of a mission. The others didn't know that but Miguel surely did which is why you fucked off in the first place. You just really liked pissing him off. It was almost compulsory watching how the tone of his messages got harsher and harsher in tone.

[misc-obeyme]

CC 😭😭😭 lesson 30 was a rollercoaster huh. Tbh as a Beel lover, I wasn’t happy w how Belphie was acting here. I asked Beel what he thought of the Angel's Trial and Belphie just cuts him off!! And he made Beel sad and that is unacceptable to me 😤 (he says not to make him mad but no spoilers for og lesson 16 could make me choose not to be a petty bitch when I can) Beel is his own person and too sweet for this shit

Telling Sol his cooking sucks was :((( 0/10 I would've gently reminded him ratios are important especially in baking and just make sure he's not putting anything inedible in there. Or tell him to focus his creativity solely on the plating/presentation bc you eat w your eyes too or smt idk

I kinda found it funny when Sim basically told Luke he was an ugly crier. Poor baby, I hope the egg grants him that wish

I get this was setup for Levi's Little D arc but teasing the truth again makes me wanna bang my head on a wall. I know Lucifer suspects smt abt us. We know Barb knows something

Speaking of Barb, I choose to believe that the Little Ds are gonna be important later and that Beel did eat Number 6 but Barb uh, made sure that didn't happen actually

AHH anon, this lesson KILLED ME. I'm so sorry to everyone who had to read the unhinged post I wrote last night lol.

Okay, see, I was so wrapped up in the Solomon debacle that I forgot about the whole Beel & Belphie thing.

I get that Belphie is being protective, but I also felt like he wasn't really taking Beel's feelings into consideration! I think there's a fine line between being protective and being controlling. And Belphie was right on the edge of that line, imo. When you're being protective to the point that you're ignoring the needs of the person you're supposedly protecting well... it kinda defeats the purpose there, buddy.

I wonder if they're going to kind of expand on that at some point. Have the twins hash it out with each other. Because I think Belphie isn't normally like this, but I think he's still wary of humans. And his concern is overriding his usual consideration of Beel's feelings.

OKAY LET'S TALK SOLOMON AGAIN.

Listen, I've had a little time to calm down, but I am still UPSET.

Now, of course, it's best to remember that this is fiction and nothing in fiction happens the way it would irl. BUT if I had a friend (or romantic interest/boyfriend/etc) who really enjoyed cooking, but for some reason always made gross food, I probably wouldn't lie to them directly. I would do exactly as you suggest, gently remind them of how to follow a recipe and so on. I can't imagine that Solomon has spent all his life trying to learn how to cook and somehow keeps screwing it up? Like considering how much he does it, he should be getting better at it?

And apparently someone told him his cooking tasted bad in season 3 of the OG, but I don't remember that lol. If it's in the hard lessons, that's why I don't remember... I haven't actually finished all the hard lessons of the OG... oops I keep forgetting they exist my bad.

Anyway, my point here is that it doesn't make sense that someone doing something they enjoy all the time wouldn't get better at what they're doing at some point. I get that this is fictional and maybe they have a reason for it, but they need to tell us what it is because I can't take HIS SAD FACE. Normally I'd be like listen sometimes you gotta be honest or whatever, but not like this!! I would've been like what exactly did you do to make the cake taste this way, let's figure it out together... I would help him, not just be all sorry this is gross and leave it at that!

Sorry sorry I'm ranting again. I just love that silly sorcerer so much and his reaction just made me so sad.

I'm so curious about what Luke is finally gonna wish for lol. I feel like Simeon teases him the most out of everybody, he's just so chill and nice about it that it doesn't register as teasing.

I just don't understand why hiding the egg's existence was a good lie while telling Solomon his cake was good wasn't??? Ugh my heart.

AND OH YES LEVI.

I was very upset about that, too!! Like, no you don't understand!! I do need to leave, but I need to get back to you!!

I want to go back, but I don't want to go back! The stress of this is getting to me. Can we please hurry up and be done with this timeline nonsense?! Barb definitely knows something. I just want him to fix things! I think I'd have confronted him about it by now. I don't care what Sol says about not telling people we're from the future, I'd be like Barbatos, my true love, I know you already know, so let's hear it!! What is going on!?!?

I definitely think the Little Ds are going to be important later, too! Something about the fairies seems like it's going to matter as well, but I'm not entirely sure how yet.

Oh no poor Number 6! Even if Barb saved him, I would think being eaten would be rather traumatic lol.

[tinukis]

Random but... Sabosan modern au thoughts?? (if you like it, of course) 👀

modern au my beloved (also sabosan in my asks i cheered)

anyway !!! i love modern au So Much and like there will be many different versions because im indecisive <3 but my favorite one is college au (thank you one piece academy for being my inspiration for some things. like thank u for giving me cafe worker sabo???) + im a college student as well... not that i have a social life but it'd be nice to have your favorites in your situations. i wont lie, it's hard to imagine ace and luffy in college. maybe ace has a better chance but luffy? hard to imagine unless hes into gymnastics or something but anyway this is about sabosan

sabo and sanji meeting is inevitable thanks to luffy. but it was more like passing by and just meeting luffy's friends at their house. however, sanji cannot keep his eyes off sabo and he hoped that no one would notice (they did. except sabo) out of respect though, no one brings it up or forces it out of him. they do tease him here and there but it all falls on sanji's shoulders and he gotta deal with it himself. but luffy is always willing to help if sanji asked. luffy tells him where to meet him and where he works, he doesnt have every little detail as these two were just the biggest ones.

again, sabo works at a cafe so sanji decides to go there and check it out in his free time. sanji just chills there and straightforwardly asks to talk to sabo (doesnt specify what) and bc he was luffy's friend, sabo was willing to listen. he does ask to go on a small break for this as he thought it was something urgent but a small talk was fine. i think sanji was a little awkward on how to approach this cause he honestly had no idea how exactly he felt about sabo (still questioned his sexuality poor guy) like did he have a crush on him or simply felt like being his friend? who knows! anyway sabo carried most of the conversation til sanji felt more comfortable to open up a little bit. they do have a great time talking and bond about luffy before sabo had to work again, but he invited sanji out once his shift ends.

after hours they end up strolling around the neighborhood before it got too dark and sanji really liked to be around his presence. he seemed very gentleman like, too. and sabo's relationship with his coworker/friend reminded sanji of luffy and another certain redhead. sanji noticed that sabo was able to cook and offered recipes which sabo was eternally grateful for. as the day ends, sanji thought he hit it off with sabo well. and even before heading home, sabo handed sanji his phone number so that they could make plans to hang out more or even just talk over the phone. (though it kinda complicates things more for sanji bc first off he had a "love at first sight" moment when he laid eyes on sabo, and every time he saw him whenever he'd visit luffy, it was hard to Not Look at sabo every time his presence is felt. and now sanji finally mustered up the courage to talk and officially befriend sabo just to get his number at the end? not only that they technically went on a mini date after his shift? even if it was a little stroll, sanji would be lying if he said his heart wasnt going to jump out at any moment)

on sabo's end, he admired sanji and was grateful to have someone like him look after his little brother in his stead sometimes. as mentioned before, sabo did Not notice sanji's glances at all so he was a bit surprised that sanji would talk to him.

theyre dynamic in modern au is friends to lovers but also mutual pining bc theyre silly like that

[liquidisedfrogs]

EUROVISION RANT 2024

Last night was the night of creativity and culture that all (probably only like 20%) of Europe adores. Eurovision is one of the times when I, who am a very chill and non-judgemental person, will barf out my thoughts and write my commentary (cos I'm better than Graham Norton). STRAP IN MOTHERFUCKERS.....

We started this wonderful evening with a performance of Hooked On a Feeling which I gotta say is a banger but what's with that Burger King background? He was decent, to say the least but more or less it was just an old dude who stood on the stage singing which is just quite meh. Loved the flag parade, Swedish music is awesome. 

PERFORMANCE 1 : SWEDEN- UNFORGETTABLE- MARCUS & MARTINUS This is a damn catchy song but how are you supposed to tell those twins apart?! I loved the sort of club/ravey vibes it gave. The staging with all the flashing lights was pretty awesome. (ngl those twins were kinda cute) THE MEN IN BLACK DANCERS KILLED ME. It gave Matrix vibes and I'm here for it. The costumes reminded me of F1 drivers but I love it. Rank no. 10

PERFORMANCE 2: UKRAINE- ALYONA ALYONA & JERRY HEIL- TERESA  & MARIA Honestly, one of my favorites. Feminism in a good way. The taller woman gave off such Boudicca vibes and I love that, both women were so gorgeous and had amazing voices put together. I did say the rock reminded me of The Lion King but I really liked that. The costumes were also so aghhhh the Rey-Boudicca and the knight were such a great combo and the song was really catchy. Rank no.4

PERFORMANCE 3: GERMANY- ALWAYS ON THE RUN- ISAAK So. Much. Fire. Ya know, I'm actually disappointed by the fact that it wasn't in German. It's a solid song. It was quite rag-n-bone man style but I appreciate that. I do have to say it wasn't something ridiculously special but it's a nice song and a guy who looks like he gives a good hug. Rank no.14

PERFORMANCE 4: LUXEMBOURG- FIGHTER- TALI Firstly, I love her hair. It's so long and so pretty and she has got an insane voice. I'm not a fan of the song, though. It's too repetitive, extremely forgettable, and just mid song. It just wasn't anything special, it was a quite nice Middle Eastern vibe tho. Rank no. 23

PERFORMANCE 5: He got disqualified so I will not be ranking this.

PERFORMANCE 6: ISRAEL- HURRICANE- EDEN GOLAN What in the voodoo contortionist shit was that position at the beginning? Her dress tho, why she looking like she's just escaped Ghostface. Oh and look more shirtless men.  This isn't the worst song it's just not  the best. Another mid one like literally all of them this year. The dance was giving ring a ring a roses and the floor screens just were not it. She has an amazing voice, I won't lie that she doesn't but it's just not my vibe. Rank no. 17

PERFORMANCE 7:  LITHUANIA- LUKTELK- SILVESTER BELT This is one of my favourites. It's a catchy European bop and I love itttttt. The tracksuit looks well warm. I adore his jewelry its so nice. I literally started cossak dancing it was so catchy. It's a real vibe and I really appreciate it. The short people had me in stitches it was hilarious. It gave off severe jamboree vibe sbut I love that cos it's vibrant and bright and just pretty fucking awesome. Rank no.7 

PERFORMANCE 8: SPAIN- NEBULOSSA- ZORRA I am ashamed to say that I thought this was gonna be high ranking in my books but no. I am a changed person. This is a family show. I get that there's one like this every year but damn this was fucking scary. The men. In fucking thong arsed things. Nicht gut. The song was pretty good tho so and the 80s vibes rlly sold it to me. On the basis of the song not the staging, it was great. And, I mean, making out with a dancer on stage in front of your partner is very eurovision. Rank no. 13

PERFORMANCE 9: ESTONIA- 5MIINUST x PUULUUP-  (NENDEST) NARKOOTIKUMIDEST EI TEA ME (KÜLL) MIDAGI I swear this is just a group of dads who've gone screw it we're doing eurovision and rocked up with 90s rap up their sleeve and traditional instruments. I think its such a vibe and I would kill to be them when I grow up. The suits were great, idk what was up with the slits but for some reason it felt like what a k-pop group would wear to the met gala. Literally the cha cha slide. Rank no.9

PERFORMANCE 10: IRELAND- BAMBIE THUG- DOOMSDAY BLUES Fucking incredible song. Harry Potter mentioneddddd. Their make up is on-point. The song is on point. The outfit is on point. Everything abt it is so wonderfully perfect. The nails are a bit odd but its a vibe. The witches circle was incredible, the screaming bit was too. so witchy, so emo, so awesome. I loved the chilled out bit, in contrast to the rest it was perfect and probably needed. The reduction of clothing towards the end was pretty funny, my brother stared a bit too much but oh well it was great. Rank no. 1

PERFORMANCE 11:  LATVIA- DONS- HOLLOW What in the blue man x Gru crap is this? Honestly I didn't really register this one so I don't have a huge opinion on it. Also gives of Rag-n-Bone Man vibes even if it is  a typical eurovision song. Altogether its a meh song, not a fan, and the fit is just downright strange. Rank no.24 

PERFORMANCE 12: GREECE- MARINA SATTI- ZARI I am confused by this one. She has impeccable vocal control. I am extremely admiring that. The song was just a bit of a rubbish mishmash. There was too many elements. I did quite like that and the live stream addition watching on tv was quite nice. I'm confused by the outfit as well, everything just seems all over the place. It's giving Doja Cat but European. I liked the dance moves and it was pretty darn funny but just a bit mental. Rank no. 18

PERFORMANCE 13: UNITED KINGDOM- OLLY ALEXANDER- DIZZY As the youtube comments said, this gives severe gay lockerroom corn vibes. Just what the friggity frack. The crotch protection while dry humping each other?! It's just a bit odd. I did like the song. It's super catchy and very annoying. That guy can sing but maybe he needs to reevaluate where his loyalties lie in that. The staging was so confusing like for the whole thing I didn't know what was up or down or left or right, it was just mental. First proper European vibe English vibe that I've got. Very odd but it's sorta loveable. Rank no.19

HONOURABLE MENTION: LISA WOODRUFF - My whole family were so confused by this but the song was so funny for no reason such a vibe. It was genuinely better than some of the artists we've had this year. Mental but awesome.

PERFORMANCE 14: NORWAY- GÅTE- ULVEHAM I really enjoyed this one. The vocals are so ethereal and the 90s grunge mixed with Norwegian instrumental influences match perfectly. Stunning lady with an amazing band with her. The song just flowed ad the staging was all sea-witchy and I loved it. Great song, great staging, awesome euovision track. Rank no. 3

PERFORMANCE 15: ITALY- ANGELINA MANGO- LA NOIA The see through ish glittery tights were quite interesting I have to say. Her outfit was breathtaking. Her voice like many of these artists is incredible but not my vibe I have to admit. Its catchy I know it's someones cup of tea but it ain't mine. Overall, it's not too bad like I love the whole Mediterranean vibe but its just samey to the rest. Rank no.21

PERFORMANCE 16: SERBIA- TEYA DORA- RAMONDA The witchy vibes don't really match the song. I think it's really sweet. It's not super up there but it's a tune and I enjoyed listening to it. Here hair is so lovely as well. It really comes across as a bit of a plea for help but it's a lovely message and I always really enjoy Serbia's input because they're always shockingly good. I would love that dress as well if someone wants to go snag it for me. Rank no.8 

PERFORMANCE 17: FINLAND- WINDOWS95MAN- NO RULES! This is the one I've been waiting to yap about. Bloody hell this one was a ride. I'm gonna start with the fits and staging: it was so random, I am so here for it. The egg was just perfect for the randomness and running about the stage was awesomeeeee. The shorts descending from the heavens and then bursting into flames was a real highlight, so iconic. The guy dressed in all denim was such a vibe as well. I actually feel sorry for him cos the other guy stole the spotlight a bit but that was a true eurovision act. I feel I can always rely on inland to deliver something crazy and they smashed it out the park yet again. Rank no. 6

PERFORMANCE 18: PORTUGAL- IOLANDA-  GRITO The staging gave a beige mom house in the US, the makeup gave Coachella. I really thought it was quite a vibe, maybe a bit dentist office wedding but who cares shes a cracking voice and the dancers went down as 'the beekeepers in my house'. The light was giving Loreen's panini press again but it's not that bad and is a solid mid range one. Rank no.16

PERFORMANCE 19: ARMENIA- LADANIVA- JAKO This one HIT man. It was just a vibe, the like trumpets and the woman's mental ness. The patterns almost sent me into a seizure but it's eurovision, you're gonna have a migrane the next morning. She was so cool in her dress and I just loved it, the band was cool as well and jumping around the stage while singing complicated stuff like that is a talent so kudos to the singer. Rank no.11

PERFORMANCE 20: CYPRUS- SILIA KAPSIS- LIAR Yet another same samey song. It just wasn't giving me enough to get a notable score. This is no criticism to her herself but it just got too repetitive this year. Far too many scantily clad men dancing around young women. Particularly with this one, she's only 17 and she looks so much older and I was just worrying for her and praying that the dutch dude wasn't towards her. Rank no.22

PERFORMANCE 21: SWITZERLAND- NEMO- THE CODE One of my favourites for the evening. They looked like nemo as well it was so adorable. The talent to stay on that pendulum wheel thing is so freaking awesome. They cooked hard. Their vocals are so freaking stunning as well just an incredible, catchy one. The drum beat gave breakcore and it's just an ear-scratcher. It's just such a snazzy song. Rank no. 4

PERFORMANCE 22: SLOVENIA- RAIVEN- VERONIKA What in the water-coated body suit? The fit was questionable and so was the dance moves. Yet another situation where the contestant made out with the dancer. The light up tits and crotch were weird as well. Like highlighting the bits you shouldn't want to show off. Oh welllllll. IT was an interesting song, not particularly special but pretty typical eurovision. The eye makeup was on point also. Rank no.15

PERFORMANCE 23: CROATIA- BABY LASAGNE- RIM TIM TAGI DIM The pirate vibe meets My Chemical Romance were real. One of my favourites of the night. The cat pictures sold it to me heavily. I loved the fit it was such a vibe. I had it goin through my head all night. The meowing absolutely killed me. Such a banger a true sea shanty turned rock is the recipie to please my ears. Rank no.2

PERFORMANCE 24: GEORGIA- NUTSA BUZALADZE- FIREFIGHTER Yet another woman singing warbly surrounded by muscular men in interesting clothing. Her dance moves were extremely strange and probably not appropriate for the kids watching, particularly in that short of a dress. The song wasn't the worst though ( take that back probably one of my least favourites). The dance was just a bit odd. Rank no.20

PERFORMANCE 25: FRANCE- SLIMANE- MON AMOUR It was so boring. Like I was falling asleep. It needed spice. It was giving shit drake that sings falsetto that's too high for him. It was too repetitive, too boring. It didn't appeal to me one bit. Probably my least favourite. Rank no.25

PERFORMANCE 26: AUSTRIA- KALEEN- WE WILL RAVE Now, I'm not usually a fa of this vibe of music but kaleen executed it so freaking perfectly, its a n earworm that I hate but its so funny. Very Europop vibe to it, giving me jamboree vibes yet again. She reminds me of Taylor Swift and her little daughter was so sweet. This has gone down pretty well I think. Rank no.12

Now, I've finished my part and I didn't watch the after bits cos I was too busy falling asleep from slimane. Compared to last year, completely underwhelming but its decent. Some hhits hit, others missed the board completely. Sorry about even worse grammar and spelling than last year but that's all folks, see you in 2025.

[slashingdisneypasta]

Good Day For It Thugs x Reader || Headcanons

Topic: Smut HC's.

Including/Warnings:

Dale Acton: Mild dub con with (Love/Hate kinda thing+restraining you) and public sex+masturbation.

Norman Tyrus: Cockwarming and shower sex.

Wayne Jackson: Necessary use of boner pills, masturbation (and getting caught), public sex kink, and possession/sort of manipulation through sex.

Wayne's is a doozy, not gonna lie 😅 They're all good though XD

Dale Acton:

One thing that happens a l o t, is that Dale annoys you into hate sex. Hear me out here: Dale can be annoying as hell, and lot of the time- he means to be. He thinks its so fucking fun, and you're so fucking cute when you're annoyed at him. He pokes the bear as much as he can, picking on you and nudging you and just in general making himself a hUGE NUISENCE, until you give in and start snapping at him ('Would you shut up??'). Then arguing with him ('Baby, come on, hey- I was just fucking around a bit with you!- ' 'Don't you 'baby' me right now, Dale- '). Then finally you go to swat him or even wack him on the shoulder, because he is JUST THAT INFURIATING, with that perpetually amused dumbass grin on his face even when you're yelling at him, and he shoves you against the wall ('Watch it, babe, you're playin' with the big boys now'). Or pins you to the bed ('You like that? Huh? you like gettin' held down like you're nothin'?'). Or just holds your arms still by the wrists away from him ('Careful... you wouldnt wanna hurt me, would you babe?'); still with that FUCKING SMILE ON HIS DAMN FACE--

He teases you some more, liking the way you struggle, then somehow you two are making out and you're undoing his belt and you're wet as fuck, or you're making out and he's still holding you down but he grinds into you like an evil horny gremlin, or he forces your face into the bed and you clutch the sheets, or-

Look, you get the point. Moving on-

Dale is not great at using his mouth. He can kiss perfectly fine but when he gets down there, its really just... wet. But he can be taught! And he's eager to try (he loves your cunt/cock!) so, uh... *shrugs* yeah. You can pretty much mold him into the perfect cocksucker/cunt licker. Did I say that??... yes I did. Welp-

This man a l w a y s gets a boner when you spoon. He just cant handle it, having your cute ass so close to him.

Sort of an add on to the last dot point- DALE WILL TOTALLY FUCK YOU IN A MOTEL BED WITH NORMAN AND WAYNE IN THE ROOM ASLEEP. THIS MAN HAS N O CHILL. He begs until you give in, just going 'we'll be quiet. come on, just let me stick it in baby. just the tip. i promise. no one'll know. i'll be quick. i gotta- '

Sexting. You two totally sext, and have phone sex. Send him a pic while he's out 'working' with the guys and he'll have to make his way to the nearest bathroom soon-as; locking the public restroom door behind him like an asshole, leaning back on it, pulling out his dick and calling you up so you can talk him through it.

Norman Tyrus:

Soft Dom. Soft Dommmm!!! Like, he's controlling- you are his baby girl and he's the boss here ('I'm in charge here, not you, sorry sweetheart.')... but he's really nice to you XD Loves praising you. 'Sweetheart take it slow, we got some time... ', 'Fuck... you're so damn cute like that.', 'Y'think you can do that again?... I ain't done with you, pretty thing', 'Shit- Did I tell you I love you today?', 'Come on baby, I know you got some more in you. You're doing so fucking good.', 'Thaaaats it... such a good little cocksucker.', etc.

On an even softer note- Norman. Hates. PDA. Sorry ladies and gents (and all y'all in between and outside the regular gender norms), but the last thing he wants is to have any of the guys (Or anyone, really), seeing him - or you, - in such a gentle state. But that just makes your time alone all the better and more intimate between you. You're the only one who gets to see him like that. This, big, mean, scary crime guy is only ever soft and gentle and sweet, alone with you.

Okay now back to the sex-

You. finish. first. Every time. He makes it his business to make sure you, his doll, cum's good first thing.

One thing Norman is definitely into- is cockwarming. He's a busy man but he doesn't want to neglect you, so why don't you keep him company? God, the first time he suggests it ,its very clear its not his first time; That this is something he brings to every relationship. You're just moping on the couch in his office while he does paperwork, flicking through a book or playing game son your phone, when Norman sighs and separates from his desk enough to make room for you in his lap. 'Cmere'. When you round the desk and see his cock out, you go bug-eyed, but he is so?? completely?? without shame?? So straight-faced with that monster dick out and half-hard on his lap? Its a completely undeniable look for him, and you were turned on immediately seeing him like that, and you took your seat.

So you sit, milking him for upwards of an hour while he does his work; even makes and takes calls with you nestled around him. He remains hard the whole time.

Shower sex!! Sometimes shower time is the only private time the two of you have alone together (But y'all do it when you're perfectly alone and have time, too), and, honestly?? He loves seeing you naked. I don't care if you're skinny, fat, muscly or somewhere in between, he l o v e s how you look. He cant get enough. And he's not shy about his own body, either.

Shower sex isn't just needy, desperate rutting with Norman. Its slow, its him appreciating your body and you kissing all over him. Its staying in there until the water gets cold. ... then some desperate rutting and fucking you into the wall.

Wayne Jackson:

First of all, you must give him a warning at least 45 minutes prior. The man needs to take his boner pills! But I dunno, maybe its just me and my having mostly old man F/O's but I think thats kinda endearing, in a way XD

A lotta the time your sexcapades (Yes i just said that) involve watching TV and waiting for 'it to happen' (The pills to kick in), and then- 🤣🤣 And then- 🤣- Wayne will go like 'woah- alright up & attem, honey, we're ready to go, hop on'. XDDDD Sexy, huh??? XDD 😂😭

Of course, the other way that this could go is that you spend a good chunk of time with foreplay. Now, Wayne's lazy, and an ass, but I do think he likes a little foreplay. Especially if he can just sit back with you in his lap giving him kisses and rolling your hips all-needy against him- and, of course, if he can tease you.

AND- OH BOY THE TEASING. Okay okay okay. His voice gets growlier the more turned on he is. You didn't think it was possible, but it does.

Oh my god, he LOVES. TO CATCH. YOU TOUCHING YOURSELF. He could be in such a foul mood getting home from 'work', but the moment hears that??? Or walks in and sees you?? You've never seen the bastard so pleased XD Something about the fact that this isn't for him, the fact that he wasn't meant to be there, wasn't meant to know about this-- makes this creepy old man feel young again. Like, no need for a pill. He's good. 'Well wouldja look at that... Ready to go, honey?'. But lorddddd, could you imagine that man walking in on you like that?? That shit-eating grin? 'Ooh, now what's that you're watchin?', '... 😏watcha got under the covers there, sweetheart?', 'well damn, am I late to the party?'.

Sort of the same thing as one of Dale's dot points- but Wayne h a s b e e n k n o w n to get frisky in the same room that the others are sleeping in. He's not gonna full on fuck you, because this is way less about his sexual pleasure and more about his cruel nature (He loves to put you in Situations. It is so fun for him.). So it'll be him feeling you up, or him throwing an am over your waist from behind and fingering you. The important part is 'you better stay silent, sweetheart, or everyone's gonna know what a naughty little thing you are.'

Okay. A bit of a feelsy one here.

Wayne definitely gets jealous and possessive. If someone else (Especially someone better then him. Don't get it twisted, the man knows he's a no-good loser. Usually he doesn't mind... but he still resents people who have got their shit together), someone taller, or younger, or richer, or nicer- pays attention to you, Wayne gets spiteful. And bitter.

And then when you two are alone again he gets kind of... uhhh... full-on. Sex with Wayne is never all that serious- and even if it is, a it of humour is never too far away. But in times like these he is t o t a l l y serious, and honestly?? A lot better then he usually is. He really steps it up. You suspected that he had to be better then he seemed, he sure was old enough to be, but you didn't know he could kiss you like this. You didn't know he could eat you out or suck you off- at all. You didn't know he knew about that one Spot.

You learn a lotta things about what he knows how to do, and how he's just being lazy and greedy most of the time.

He finally shows you his real game, because he wants to prove to you he's the one you want. Pull out the big guns, he figures, and you'll stick around.

... oh and finally. i'm pretty sure he has a breeding kick of some description. do not let this man get you pregnant; he will not pay child support.

[eyedove]

sorry but its keeping me up. i cant sleep. its winter. the twins are born just before candlenights so when magnus gets a random hair up his ass about DECORATING TAAKO WE HAVE TO DECORATE we havent decorated since before casey!!!! taako has to do most of it himself. hauling in boxes and carrying the stupid fucking bush because magnus would absolutely lift a fuckin 70 pound box of metal candleholders and glittery decor if taako let him get within ten feet of one even though the twins are very much not in need of being involved in any weight lifting and magnus will get pokey about finding glitter on their pillows 2 days after being exposed. taakos all frustrated about it because he has a 3 y/o to watch as well who is NOT HELPING CARRY THINGS!!! but magnus is being absolutely snotnosed about it, snively and stressed, so hes gotta fuckin HOLD IT TOGETHER. the entire operation. ALWAYS taakos job to fuckin, make shit work is it not!!! once again here we go!!! but then one night they get a moment where all the lights are put up and the fireplace is going and casey is in bed and he and magnus get to just sit together on the floor and fucking. chill for a little while. and taakos like UGH. okay. this is kinda worth it. hey? not gonna lie, pretty stoked on candlenights present from you this year and magnus is like (sweating).... ididntgetyouanythingreally and taako has to make a split second decision between being pissed off, PRETENDING to be pissed off, and berating magnus relentlessly for not getting his super hilarious and very limited-time pregnancy brand joke, and just ends up laughing and magnus is like whew ok cool you seem fiiiine. its fine (it is fine) (everythings great) (the holidays go fine)

[narcolini]

in his shadow - pt. 4

ez reyes x oc: ava gomez (& bonus angel), 3072 words

for day 26 of whumpril, using alternative prompt: words that can’t be taken back

a/n: ahh i love making drama for the sake of drama, it’s so good for the soul

tagging: @cositapreciosa @drabbles-mc​ (let me know if u want to be tagged!)

previous part here

It’s been a week, well, a weekend and a day, and EZ still hasn’t heard from Ava. The last he saw of her, she was leaving the trailer, hair a mess, jacket and near-empty tequila bottle stuffed into her bag. It’d been good. Real fucking good. Nice, like they were dating, or something. Like there was a genuine connection between them. And then, nothing.

No text, no call.

He’s trying to be chilled about it. No biggie, because they aren’t dating, are they? They barely even know each other. Well, that’s a lie, even if it does make him feel better to think it. They’d gotten close fast enough to feel like he’s known her as long as the rest of the guys have. Longer, even. Maybe. He knows things she’s never told them. Heard the shit that goes on behind that doe-eyed expression, that endless look of kindness. It sits in her features even when she’s swearing, or chatting shit with liquor on her breath. Just endless, endless, kindness. Like she’d been drawn up by Disney or some shit.

‘The fuck you smiling about?’ Angel asks, lips tweaking like he’s in on it, catching his brother’s attention.

They’re parked up outside the sandwich place they can’t get enough of, waiting for the food coma to settle before they leave again. Angel’s reclined on his bike, head against the handle bars, EZ’s standing on the sidewalk, shoulder to the nearest pole.  

‘Nothing.’ EZ shrugs. ‘Just thinking.’

‘Bout what?’

‘You want a list or something? Stuff, things.’

Angel slides the shades up from his face, into his hair. He’s scrutinising him like he knows something, or is about to. Like he can read the thoughts in EZ’s head. ‘Did you get laid?’ he asks, uncertain of his guess until he sees EZ’s chin dip in response. ‘Ho—ly fuck. Little bro finally got his dick wet.’

‘Shut up, man.’

‘Who’s the lucky princess?’ He smirks. ‘I know her?’

EZ’s head shakes. He hates when Angel’s like this, hates even more when he’s right about it too. ‘I’m not telling you when you’re being a dick about it.’

He sits up, boots planting on the ground either side of his bike. ‘Shit, it’s that serious? Why am I only just hearing about it now?’

How does he answer that? Logically, he know’s it not serious, not by their standards. Not by Ava’s either, probably. But he has to physically stop himself from saying yes, because that’s the answer that tries to fly out. Yeah, kinda. Yeah, I hope so.

‘I don’t know,’ he says instead. ‘Maybe.’

‘Maybe?’ Angel’s teetering on a laugh, pure glee at his brothers uncertainty sitting behind his eyes. He could do this for hours. ‘You gotta give me a name, Romeo. Who’s got you all caught up like this?’

EZ sighs. He’s got two options, a long death, drawn out and real fucking annoying, or the short, merciful one. Sure to sting, but quicker to fade. ‘Well,’ he starts, hanging his thumbs in his jean pockets, ‘me and Ava have kind of…’

‘Kind of…’ Angel winds his head in EZ’s vision, trying to lure the rest of it out of him. ‘Started a bookclub, or what? The fuck is it, bro?’

‘We’ve been hanging out.’

He squints, then his eyes go wide. ‘Oh, come on, Ezekiel.’

‘There it is.’ He shouldn’t have said anything. Should’ve lied and said he was smiling about his fucking sandwich.

‘You slept with her?’ Angel’s voice pitches up, like he can’t believe it. ‘Damn, bro, it’s like you fucking hate happiness. My God.’

He’s shaking his head at him, but EZ’s no idea why. Honestly, he hasn’t a fucking clue. What was so bad about it? They’re both adults, they’re both single. He know’s Ava’s baggage as well as anyone, better even, than Angel himself. If anything, spending time with her had made him happier than he’s been in years. The first real good thing to happen since getting out.

‘The fuck does that mean, Angel?’

He ignores the question, muttering to himself, as he toys with the helmet in his lap. ‘That’s so fucked up, man.’

‘Why is it?’ EZ's back straightens, a defensive response. He’s starting to get irritated. ‘It was her idea.’

‘Yeah,’ Angel nods, ‘and now you’re all up in your feelings, falling in love with her, while she’s out, acting all new and sexy and shit, thanks to your dumbass self.’

‘What’s wrong with that?’

‘What’s wrong with…’ He scoffs, looking up again. ‘You realise she’s about to go out and get a man that isn’t in a fucking MC now? Probably on Tinder already. You’re a rebound, boy-scout.’

EZ bristles, jaw clenching. He tries to shake it off afterwards, like Angel’s words are nothing at all, just noise without weight. It isn’t convincing, even he can tell that. He’s got a face like a scolded child. ‘You don’t know that,’ he says.

‘Don’t I?’ Angel laughs. ‘Been in this club way fucking longer than you, and I ain’t never seen a widow go for a Mayan twice.’

He’s right, EZ knows that. Even though he’s not seen it himself, he can recognise why. One death would put you off for good, but it isn’t like that, is it? Ava hadn’t used him as the jumping point for the return of her love life. Wouldn’t mess him about for the sake of messing about. And it wasn’t like he was in love with her, or falling, even. They were just hanging out. It was fun, mutually. It still is. It can be as simple as that, no matter what Angel puts into his head.

‘You spoken to her since?’ Angel asks.

He doesn’t answer, which says all Angel needs to hear. Tutting, laughing, head shaking like EZ is utterly clueless.

‘You’re full of shit, Angel,’ he snarks, pulling his own helmet from the seat of his bike. ‘You don’t know what you’re talking about.’

‘Yeah, cause you’re the expert on women.’

I know her, he wants to say, clicking the strap under his chin. I know her, and you don’t, even with all the years you had to get there. Maybe it was rebound, maybe he’s the rebound, but so what, right? That doesn’t mean he’s fucked up, or ruined whatever they’d started. Ava had wanted someone to treat her like a normal fucking woman, and he’d done that, that’s all.

That’s all, isn’t it?

*

‘There’s someone out front for you, Ava.’

‘Really?’ She looks up from her work, hand mid-wipe over the leather seat. ‘I’ve not booked anyone in for the afternoon.’

Her colleague shrugs, not lingering long enough to explain beyond, ‘He said he’s here to see you.’

She only has a handful of male clients—eyebrows, botox, lip-filler—but none of them are due anytime soon. If one of them’s back already, then it can only be a bad thing. A complaint, maybe, a mistake on her part. God. She hates dealing with that. The guilt over it, no matter how small, is enough to knock her confidence for weeks. To make her doubt her qualifications entirely. She chucks the cloth on the side, peeling the gloves from her hands to toss them in the trash on the way past. It’ll be okay, really, she doesn’t have any clients that would hold it against her. I mean, she’s an aesthetician, not a robot. Mistakes happen. Bodies react in different ways, even if you’ve had the treatment before.

She rounds the corner, into the small shop front that acts as a greeting desk and waiting room all in one, and finds it’s not a client at all. It’s EZ, full leathers and helmet, standing dark against the blinding pink of the walls.

‘Oh,’ she can’t help but feel relieved, ‘it’s you.’

He smiles, looking shy from her reaction. ‘Yeah, hey.’

‘D’you need something?’ She pauses behind the desk, waiting as he dawdles forward. It’s obvious he isn’t comfortable here. He looks seconds from sprinting out the door, knocking fake palms trees and magazine stands on his way. ‘Did you call me?’

‘Nah, I figured I’d just stop buy. Speak to you in person.’ He puts his elbow on the desk in front of her, leaning like he’s comfortable. Or trying to be. ‘You got a minute?’

She has an entire afternoon, technically, but she also has a shit load of paperwork to catch up on. Expenses to list, lash in-fills to count. ‘Sure, I got a window.’ An hour, for him, is nothing.

She nods toward the back, inviting him to follow. They could talk here, sure, but he looks like he wants privacy. And, well, she doesn’t really want her colleagues to see them chatting in the first place. She’d got this job after Seb had died, unable to go back to her last one. So the shock of a man in a kutte, lingering in the middle of the shop, might send a gossip shockwave strong enough to unsettle her peace forever. The questions would never stop—and God knows, she doesn’t have the patience for that.

‘You been good?’ he asks, walking behind her.

‘Yeah, busy.’

‘Though I might’ve heard from you.’

She lets him into her room, and shuts the door behind. He looks just as out of place here, standing by the reclining seat, under the white lights, as he did out front. ‘I know,’ she sighs, ‘I haven’t had a minute to stop.’

He nods but doesn’t look convinced. It’s not like she’s lying, not like she has any reason too. They’d made up, she thought, more than made up. The last time they hung out, they’d ended the day on a high she’d never even imagined. Swollen lips, fresh spirit, an electricity under her skin that she’d forgotten the feeling of. She didn’t think they had any more catching up to do. Let’s call it even, he said, and then sweeten the deal on top of it.

‘Is something the matter?’ she asks, because he clearly isn’t going to start himself. He’s standing like he’s scared to move, one thigh against the leg-rest.

‘Nah.’ His head shakes, brow pinching. ‘Not really.’

‘But?’

He sighs, settling his hands on the edges of his cut, fists over his chest. ‘Honestly, Angel got in my head about something,’ he confesses. ‘Thought I could talk to you about it.’

Now it’s her turn to frown, because she never got the impression Angel had the ability. EZ’s the brainy one, the logical one. Angel surely had no way of twisting his thoughts away from himself.

‘Oh boy.’ She lets out a breath, moving to lean against the nearest counter. ‘Should I be worried?’

He smiles slightly, just enough to put it into the creases of his eyes. ‘Depends,’ he says, ‘on whether I’m a rebound or not.’

‘What?’

‘Angel thinks you’ve, I don’t know. Shit.’ He sighs. ‘Can we start that again?’

‘A rebound?’ How could he be, how could he or Angel even think that? For starters, it’s been three fucking years since Sebastian died. If he was a rebound, it was less of a bounce and more like a delayed crack, a skimmed stone that made one fucking ripple, way out into the bay. ‘As in, what? I used you to make myself feel better?’

He’s exhaling through his teeth, rubbing the back of his head. ‘That came out wrong, was trying to make a dumb joke, lighten the mood. Sorry.’

But it came from somewhere, out his lips like he’d been wondering it his whole way here. ‘No, go on. What did Angel think?’

‘You don’t want to know.’

‘Well someone’s gonna have to explain that rebound line, EZ.’

He looks like he wants the ground to eat him, whole and scrambling, but he carries on. To his credit, he carries on. ‘He thinks us sleeping together was a mistake.’

She doesn’t comment on the fact that telling Angel in the first place, is the real mistake, but from the looks of him he’s knows it already. Like he regrets it enough to make her overlook it, focusing on the next problem. ‘And that matters because…?'

‘Like I said, he got in my head about it.’

‘How?’

‘How what?’

‘How did he get in your fucking head?’ she stresses, almost laughing at the absurdity of it. They’re parroting each others words like they’re speaking a different language. ‘Angel thinks a lot of dumb shit, and you never take notice of that. Why does it matter now?’

Why is it any of his business? How can something like that even be a mistake, when it’s just fun, just two people enjoying themselves. If Angel’s said she’s using EZ as a rebound, to propel herself forward in some way, why would he care, why would he—

‘Oh my god,’ she breathes, ‘you believe him, don’t you? You think I’m using you?’

‘What?’ His face scrunches, disgust showing in the kiss of his teeth. ‘No, course not.’

‘Well, you believe something, EZ. What the fuck is it? A rebound or a mistake?’

‘Neither.’ His voice is sharper now, words hardening into annoyance. ‘I just want to know what the fuck the plan is from here,’ he says. ‘Cause, you know, I’ve not heard from you at all since it happened.’

‘So, naturally, I have to have been using you?’

If she’d known he’d be this concerned, this paranoid about five days of quiet, she’d have never bothered. Honestly, she’d have never let it get past kissing in the first place. Some people can’t do just sex—Hell, she used to be one of them—if she’d known that was the case with him, she’d have stopped that train long ago. Saved them both the stress.

‘You know,’ he says carefully, like he’s holding something back, ‘you know, I wouldn’t think that.’

She flaps her arms up. ‘You near enough said it yourself, EZ. The fuck am I meant to do? Read minds?’

He turns away, just for a moment, to take a breath big enough to lift his shoulders. She watches them go up, down, up again. When he’s facing her afterwards, he looks calmer. Not believably so, but in the conscious, put on like a mask, way. He’s trying, at least. She appreciates that, as much as it does nothing for the sourness in her stomach. The quiet anger beneath her ribcage.

‘Look, I just, really didn’t know what the fuck to think, okay?’

She nods. Carry on, keep digging.

‘Angel said all this shit, and I hadn’t heard from you.’ His voice lowers a fraction. ‘And I know the stuff with Seb is always gonna be there.’

‘Make your point, EZ.’ She tries to sound commanding, but it comes out too quiet, almost like a plea. The mention of Sebastian now, right now, in relation to whatever she’s started between them, is the last thing either of them need. It doesn’t help his argument in the way he thinks it does.

‘I don’t care,’ he says, ‘if this goes no where. I don’t care if we never fucking touch each other again.’ He’s closer now, eyes intense on hers. ‘But if your plan is to avoid me forever—’

She cuts him off. ‘When have I said that?’

He waits, searching her expression.

‘I’ve been busy,’ she says, for what feels like the hundredth time, true or not. ‘I didn’t think sex came with a contract, y’know? One fuck equals three texts a day.’

He laughs, but it’s dry as anything, stripped of all humour. ‘Come on, Ava. If you don’t wanna talk like adults, I don’t know why I’m even here.’

‘Yeah, me and you both.’ This wasn’t even an issue before Angel had spoken to him, wouldn’t be something worth talking about at all, if she’d just been allowed to come back to him in her time. Of her own accord. ‘I had no intentions of blowing you off, EZ,’ she says, putting it like an insult somehow. Too highly strung to use it as the mediator she intended it to be. ‘If anything, I was really fucking happy with, y’know, whatever we’ve got going on.’

It still works, though. Words tight, or not, they land all the same, softening EZ’s shoulders. Putting a lighter breath into his throat.

‘Yeah, sure,’ she continues, ‘I’m not planning on having a relationship any time soon—but that doesn’t mean I’m using you.’

‘I know.’

‘I wouldn’t do that.’

He sighs, repeating it. ‘I know.’

‘I should’ve text you,’ she admits. ‘But I didn’t think you’d be taking advice from Angel, of all people.’

He catches the slight smile she’s offering, doubling it himself, and partnering it with a half-laugh. ‘Shit,’ he says, ‘I might kill him, actually. Think that’s probably the best solution.’

‘That or sewing his mouth shut.’

He snorts, head twitching sideways with he force of it. ‘That’d solve half my fucking problems in one.’

‘Yeah,’ she agrees, ‘me too.’ Someone should’ve thought of that sooner. ‘So, are we good? No pressure and no panic either, right?’

He doesn’t want it to be just sex, doesn’t want that to signal the end of them hanging out at all, but she equally doesn’t want it to be a promise of anything more. If he can’t meet her in the middle, then a clean break is all they have left. Back to how it was, with her as the widow, and him as the prospect. Nothing more, nothing less. Two people with one foot in the ring.

But he nods, and she sighs like the alternative would’ve made her collapse.

‘I really gotta stop saying shit without thinking,’ he says, smiling faintly.

She mirrors him. ‘True, but I have to stop saying nothing at all. Keep forgetting you you aren’t as old and fucked up as me.’

‘Woah,’ he frowns, ‘old? Come on, you got at least ten years before retirement.’

She laughs, too caught off guard to be offended. She’s got six years on him, max, but it’s not worth fighting over it now. ‘I like how you’re fine with the fucked up part.’

‘Oh, you’re definitely wrong there too. Fucked up beyond imagination, really.’

‘Mhm,’ she nods, matching his tease, ‘keep going. Your chances of never touching me again are really starting to sky-rocket.’

[fanficwriter284]

Just a random quick write

“Chucky please”

“No I ain’t doing it”

“Come on, her husbands only here for a few days all I’m asking for you is to hang out with him”

Chucky’s frown only deepened, his eyes squinting at his wife. He wanted nothing to do with his neighbor, or her son, he hadn’t met her husband but if he was willing to marry that raging lunatic, then he was crazier than him.

“Nope, I told ya woman I ain’t doing it”

“Fine then I’m telling that we can host the kids play date here.”

Chucky nearly choked on his drink. He hated hosting, it was a literal living hell. So many children and their chatty parent’s desperate to converse with each other.

“NO FINE FINE I’ll do it…Jesus”

Tiffany let out a sly smirk raising her brow, giving her husband a satisfied peck on the cheek.

“Come on it’s not that bad…plus it’s the neighborly think to do”

“Fuck that shit Tiff, what am I American?”

“Yes you are”

“Not at heart Tiff. In Germany we don’t fucking do that shit.”

Tiffany only responded with an eye roll as she trailed up the stairs.

…

Chucky had just been sitting on his couch drinking a Canada Dry, since he thought it would be appropriate, and go for a smooth first interaction. He felt his body straighten hearing the doorbell.

“Let’s get this shit over with”

He forced himself off his couch and reluctantly opened the door. He was met with lime eyes, sandy locks, and a toothy smile.

“Hey there names Jim”

Chucky shook the man’s hand raising a bore, this was different, he was expecting a self-absorbed asshole. Bu this was different.

"Charles, but I'd rather you call me Chucky or Chuck I don't really care"

"Pleasure to meet ya Chuck"

''...uh Yeah Likewise"

"Sorry for intruding I know you probably don't want me here...so I brought drinks"

"...Come on in"

The two chatted for a while watching a soccer game while sipping on some booze. The sweetness still lingering on their tongues.

"Haha look man I gotta admit I hated the thought of you swinging by, but you're actually a pretty chill guy....can't say the same for your wife though"

"Haha yeah yeah I though so...wait you mean my Ex Wife?"

Chucky nearly choked on his drink, he heard from McKenzie herself that she was married.

"Ex? I thought you two were married?"

"HA! To that entitled bitch? No thankfully I got out of that hell whole. That woman still refers to me as her husband? The audacity the bitch cheated on me...hehe gotta admit I was kinda relieved finally got me an excuse to get out"

"DAMN...wait so is Urhighness your kid?"

"Yeah....."

"...Fucckkk ok I can't lie to you....that kid is a fucking nuisance"

"Heh yeah, after his mom got to him his turned into a spoiled ass brat"

"Yeah....ok I gotta....why the name Urhighness"

"I've been asking that same question for the last 14 years Chuck...His mothers a real piece of work."

"You got that right"

[pro-mammonologist]

The Smell of Fear

CW: angst, mentions of violence, trauma, etc (nsfw in future parts)

Fem!Mc x Mammon

Part 2/(?)

Part 1 here

There’s lots of dialogue so readability is in question!!! But I got emotional writing it!!! So it’s quality!!!!

—————————————————————————

You awoke the next morning, sweaty and oily. Mammon had clung to you all night, probably drooling on you in your sleep. You stretched your legs and turned to face him. He was already staring at you, eyes gentle and concerned. You smiled at him and kissed his forehead.

“Mornin’.” He said, brushing his fingers through your tangles.

“Morning. How’d you sleep?” You asked as if it were a regular morning.

“Okay, I guess. Are you okay? Any nightmares, concerns? I already told Lucifer we’re stayin’ home, you have no choice.” He told you, much more stern than usual. You smiled at him, not used to him being assertive when he isn’t joking. “Whatcha gigglin’ at, ‘m serious.” He re-asserted.

“I know. I didn’t really want to go to RAD anyways.” You stretched and moved your limbs to touch the cold parts of the bed. “I feel better here. Let’s just sleep all day.” You suggested, expecting Mammon to agree.

“I wanna take you to a doctor and then we can chill. Are you okay?”

“You already asked that.”

“But you didn’t answer. I don’t want you feelin’ bad. Makes me feel bad.” He shot back, his tone going from irritated to concerned. His eyes averted you for a minute. “Sorry.” He rolled onto his back.

“It’s okay. I’m fine Mammon, nothing really happened.” You responded, sounding distant.

“There’s gotta be something!” He looked back at you, already readjusting to be back on his side. “You don’t sound like you. I know it was scary…” He trailed off. “Did I scare you?” His face was undeniably flushed, emphasizing the blue in his eyes.

You hesitated before answering. “Would my answer upset you?” You asked, looking away and fixating your gaze on your hands, doing anything to be distracted.

Mammon also hesitated. He went to open his mouth as if he planned to speak, but remained silent. The silence lasted for a few more seconds before you sat up on the bed.

“Because it kinda did.” You told him, not wanting to turn around and see his face, afraid of outlash or disappointment. “I came here with the predisposition that demons were immoral, heartless, and evil. Each religion has taught that. I came here with an open mind, now knowing that everything I was taught was bias or—like—a control thing. But I know you guys have lived since before, you know, mental health stuff. So I figured you did bad things. However, people change and since you’ve been around longer, you’ve seen more and had longer to mature and stuff.” You stopped your ramble and struggled to choke back tears. Mammon didn’t respond, remaining quiet. You didn’t want to turn around and show him your tears, though he could see through your voice and body language what state you were in.

Finding the courage to continue, you breathed and finished your thoughts. “While I’ve been here, I can tell you feel empathy, you a lot more than all of your brothers. You’ve shown me kindness and love that I’ve never experienced, but you’re those ‘evil’ demons. Sure, Belphie… well. I—that’s a whole other story. But I’m not going to lie, seeing the blood on your hands and hearing what you said, it scared me. I wasn’t scared you would hurt me in that moment or after, but—“

“It’s okay. I know what you mean. I hate seeing myself become that person. It’s hard because I used to—after the fall—do things I wish I didn’t. I couldn’t stomach torture, but I would…” he stopped himself. “Is it okay if I keep talkin’?”

“…yeah.”

He leaned up to sit beside you. “I’ve definitely killed. I’ve beaten people. I have seen really awful things I don’t even wanna say. I hate seein’ any of it. I guess that’s kinda why I don’t like horror movies or anything scary.” Now it was him choking back tears. He tried to push a chuckle with the last comment, but it came out strained and fake. You continued to listen to him. “I hate talkin’ about it. Me and Beel have talked about it before, I guess you could say we’re the most sensitive. Lucifer, Satan, and Belphie have mostly done the worst stuff, the things I could do. As time has passed, I’ve learned that my sensitivity is not weak, but definitely causes me problems, so I hate talkin’ about this stuff. But to be honest, I was scared of myself in that moment. I had to stop myself from killin’ em, I thought they were gonna… I don’t wanna know.” His voice broke up and the tears started to fall. You turned to him and instinctively put your arms around him.

He leaned into you and you both broke out in tears, ugly crying your hearts out. He clutched onto you almost in a death grip, unaware of his own strength. You didn’t mind, it made you hold his back just as tight. If someone were to walk in, he’d be humiliated, but his ego might get stroked a little bit with your arms around him like so. You remained like this until both your eyes were drained and throats were hurting.

Mammon was the first to speak. “I don’t think I wanna keep talkin’ about this. You can, but I can’t.”

You nodded. “It’s okay. I don’t wanna get into the bad stuff anymore. Just know that it’s my, I guess you could call it, my remnants of indoctrination.” You snorted, bringing a smile to his face. “I know you’d never hurt me. Don’t know about others, but you’re more human than most humans.” You smiled at him and he looked at you squinting his eyes. “What are you insulted?”

He blew a raspberry and shook his head. “I’m playin’ with you. I know what you mean. I think you’re more human that most demons, humans, and angels. Actually, I think you’re the human-est of all humans.”

Now you shook your head and laid back down, checking the time and realizing you cried for around 20 minutes. You put your DDD away and poked Mammon’s side.

“What?”

“I love you. Hearing you talk about that made me feel a lot better, I feel like we are more connected now.” You sniffled a little bit, the aftermath of your crying session still impacting you.

“You tellin’ the truth? You ain’t scared?” He turned his head to look at you.

“If I am, it’s my own paranoia. I really, really love you. You have done more for me than anyone I’ve ever met. I don’t lie to you, ever. I wouldn’t lie to you or trick you like what you’re used to.” You reaffirmed, adding more strength to your voice.

“You make me feel things I ain’t ever felt, ever. I love my brothers but you—you’re different. Every time I see you or am around you, I feel a warmth I’ve never felt before. Even if you were lyin’ I’d still love you more than anything in all of existence. And I mean that. I will do whatever I need to to make you happy, to keep you healthy, to keep you alive, and to make your life easier. I can’t even tell you in any way how I feel it’s more than I can say.”

“You’re gonna make me cry again.” You said, tears falling again. You wiped your eyes and leaned back up, pulling his head to yours. You kissed him, a long but gentle and passionate kiss. You cupped his cheeks and he tangled his hands in your hair. When you separated, you put your forehead to his. He cupped your cheeks as well and huffed a small laugh.

“What’re we doin’? I like it but it’s weird. Is it some human thing?”

“I guess? I just wanna be close.”

He smiled and you stayed like that for a few seconds more and then pulled back, yanking him into a laying position on the bed with you.

Following a few more minutes of laying on your asses, scrolling on your DDDs, you finally convinced yourself to get out of bed to go to the bathroom, prompting Mammon to arise as well. The two of you brushed your teeth and washed your face. Through brushing his teeth, Mammon suggested the two of you go get lunch then you go see your doctor. Initially, you didn’t want to but Mammon was rather persuasive earlier so you accepted your fate. The both of you ended up just changing part of your clothes instead of all-together because that’s what trauma and depression tends to do to you. Mammon decided to take you across the Devildom to a breakfast joint you’d never been to. Sitting down to eat, you noticed strange glances in your direction.

“Mams, why are they looking at us? Was there a news report or something?” You whispered.

“No, I don’t think so. And I don’t think rumors spread that fast. Ignore ‘em.” He took a long sip of his drink and pushed yours to you. “Drink, baby.”

You rolled your eyes and mimicked him, gulping down a decent portion. When you received your food, Mammon watched to make sure you were eating enough and pushed you to eat more. You humored him, knowing how stubborn he is. Mammon also insisted on paying in full, which for the most part is rare. He’s much more of a split kind of guy.

You left the restaurant, full and feeling as though your fears were nothing but irrational. Mammon could say he felt the same. To him, you could’ve forgotten what happened the day before, you were so ecstatic to be with him. Mammon’s heart was feeling as full as his stomach and his doubts disappeared as fast as the money in his wallet.

After a much more relaxed doctors appointment which you thought was going to be unusually annoying and stressful, you told Mammon you still wanted to relax. And Mammon being Mammon said he had a great idea. He went to the nearest corner store to buy a few things without your knowing, telling you that you weren’t allowed to see. Mammon hid the bag to the best of his ability and drove you home straight into his room-garage.

“Okay, so I want you to lay on your stomach! On the bed!” He turned on the car and quickly raced to the bathroom.

“What are you planning, Mammon?”

He shushed you loudly. “Oh and you might need to strip!”

“Strip???” You went down the stairs of his room and removed your top, shoes, bottoms, and socks. You plummeted yourself onto the bed only in undies. “Are you gonna give me massage? I feel like you are. I could’ve sworn I saw oil.” You shouted loud enough for him to hear through the door.

“Okay, but it’s a special massage! And I’m not gonna do anything dirty! I promise!” He shouted back and opened up the door, a small group of items in tow.

“Okay, lavender oil for stress… chocolate… and…”

“…it’s an over-the-counter magic item.” He told you, giddy with excitement.

“What’s it do?” You pondered.

“You’ll see.” He waggled his brows and you look at him with suspicion. “If I tell you it’ll ruin the surprise!” He hopped on your back, sitting on your backside.

“It’ll be good right?” You asked.

“I will be your favorite person for forever! It’ll feel great, I promise!”