#klevin

[vampirescantgetpregnant64]

final updated (s7) riverdale relationship chart :,)

[when-is-tuesday]

i don’t know what Kelvin is, (I think it’s a system like Fahrenheit) but I want to name one of my children klevin now. Not kelvin. Klevin.

[ebbythust]

Oleksandr Usyk am Samstag am Ring von Tyson Fury vs. Dereck Chisora

Oleksandr Usyk am Samstag am Ring von Tyson Fury vs. Dereck Chisora

Oleksandr Usyk – bescheiden und sympathisch. Oleksandr Usyk kommt nicht nur um den Kampf zu sehen, sondern er möchte über einen Kampfvertrag mit Tyson Fury verhandeln. Bild plus überträgt den Kampf in Deutschland live. Egis Kilmas, der Manager des WBA-, WBO- und IBF-Schwergewichts-Champions Oleksandr Usyk, hat seine Absicht bekannt gegeben, an diesem Wochenende für den Trilogie-Kampf zwischen…

[normanblogs]

Binibining Pilipinas 2022 National Costumes Part 1

Binibining Pilipinas 2022 National Costumes Part 1

In random order, here is the first group of eight photos for the National Costumes of Binibining Pilipinas 2022 shot at Las Casas Filipinas De Acuzar by the duo of Raymond Saldaña and Owen Reyes. Chelsea Fernandez in Nick Guarino Ira Patricia Malaluan in Jojo Alidio Karen Laurrie Mendoza in Tata Blas-Pinuela Justinne Punsalang in Klevin Bartolaba Jannine Navarro in Javy Manipon Nyca Bernardo in…

[kaiserscissors]

omg it has been years since my last ia post. klevin design drawn at likeee 3am

[keyn-jender-bite]

The Dark is Getting Darker in The City

part one

It's getting later now in this big, cramped city and I'm awake and on the case. I haven't got a bedtime, which is bad news for the ne'er-do-wells and would-be meanies prowling these damp, cramped streets.

I've got my light pink thermos of dark, creamy coffee in my right hand and my left in my pocket, holding my pocket knife gently.

A tall, worried fiancee named Aurora Hildebrandt wants me to track down his second in a triad and I'll do my damndest, because I've been paid properly and that's all that matters.

Like any hard-boiled private dick, I have access to certain resources in the tightly-packed dirty laundry hamper that is this great big city. My shoes splash in the shallow puddles which gather on the pebbled street, making an echoing clippy-cloppy noise. I've pulled the collar of my coat up around my face and retrieved my well-worn hat from the waste bin. I look the part, now to get some answers.

The bell above the doorway into Sal's Gentry rings out a melodious tintinnabulation as I enter the small grocery store on the corners of 139th and Gasoline avenue. Ribbons the black cat winks at me from his perch atop a stack of pop cases. I give him a quick scritch behind the ears and wind my way to the service counter, past shelves of cans and bags filled with various brick-a-brack.

"Yes?" Sal asks distractedly, not even bothering to look up from the rifle magazine in her tattooed hands.

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water." I say gruffly before taking a sip of steaming coffee from my thermos. This got her attention.

"Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill swore revenge on the bastard that pushed him." She replies, folding closed her manuscript and looking up at me. "Detective, what brings you in here on a rainy night like this, all dark and whatnot?"

"Evening, Salisbury. I've been recently visited by a certain someone looking for a different certain someone. Thought maybe you had some information."

Sal smiled a small, thing grin. "That is-incredibly vague. Can you be any more specific?"

"Let's just say that star-crossed lovers get lonely even when we can't see the stars in the night sky."

"Okay, sure. That's very poetic, but there are like, 12 million people in this city without counting the tourists. I'm going to need a name or something to go on. Really."

"It starts with an A."

"Are you kidding? Geez-ok...Astor Pangolin?"

"Is that a real person?"

"I don't know! They could be! Come on, you have got to give me something here!"

"He's fond of the color red."

"The Rouge Moron?"

"That doesn't start with an A."

Sal scowled aggressively and slapped me full across the face on my left cheek.

"Aurora Hildebrandt." I say coolly, taking another handsome sip of my delicious coffee.

"Ah, little Mr. lost his fiancee and wants to be able to make his wedding work on time? I suppose I could have guessed that, given enough time."

"Slapping me seems mean now in hindsight, doesn't-"

"His fiancee is Klevin Morose, the theoretical electrical engineer, did he tell you that?"

The name sounded familiar but I couldn't put my finger on exactly why. "Is Klevin theoretical or the engineering?"

"As far as we know Klevin is real, but the work they were doing was pretty out there. Wild, inventive stuff having to do with neutrons and plutrons and something called a groupon. Here, Thyme did a whole puff piece on them." she said handing me a magazine from two months ago.

The cover was a bit smudged with chocolate fingerprints, but the main photo was legible enough. Klevin appeared to be some kind of wunderkind in the theoretical electrician scene. The main photo displayed them wearing a lab coat with their arms crossed in front of them like a super hero. Their piercing blue eyes were distorted by the thick lenses of their glasses. Their shock white hair was parted on the side and swept behind one ear, revealing a single pearl earring. Their smirk of confidence revealed what I read as a certain self-assured egotism.

"Thanks Sal." I burped, laying down a few chips on the counter in payment.

"Any time, you obscure little wank." she laughed, returning her attention to the firearms in her catalogue.

Stepping out into the dripping exterior, I thumbed through the magazine's wrinkled pages to the interview with Klevin.

"The thrust and details of your work is shrouded in a veil of secrecy, Dr. Morose, but surely there's something you can tantalize our readership with?" the interviewer asked in italics.

"Even if I was allowed to disclose the main thread of my work, which I am not obliged to do, I'm afraid you wouldn't find it edifying in the least unless you're familiar with experimental electrical theory, something I highly doubt that you are. I don't mean it as an insult, but a statement of simple fact. Am I wrong?" Klevin responded. I could almost hear their pompousness through the page.

Skimming the rest of the article one thing stood out to me as plain as day. It wasn't an item of interest so much as it was an unmistakable absence. Nowhere did Klevin mention being affianced to Aurora, or their third person.

Evidently I was in a privileged caste of the few who knew Klevin and Aurora were engaged.

"Interesting." I muttered to myself before the window beside me shattered into a cloud of glass shards.

The gunshot rang out half a second later as I threw myself to the ground, covering my head and showered by the remains of the window.

Another shot echoed just after a nearby streetlamp exploded into a halo of sparks. I crawled towards a nearby vehicle, keeping my body as close to the Earth as possible, dragging myself through the puddles and trash of the street.

"Keep your nose out of places it doesn't belong!" an anonymous voice shouted from an unknown location.

Just as I managed to roll behind the car, the front door of Sal's Gentry slammed open and a hail of shotgun fire erupted from inside, aimed nowhere in particular but effective nonetheless.

"Keep your bullets to your goddamn self you kurwa shit!" Sal screamed, unleashing hellish fire from her firearm again and again. Windows, doors, lights and dead trees blew up in riotous fashion as she leveled the neighborhood in a sweeping arc.

All I could do was shield myself from the flying detritus, pulling my hat over my eyes and praying.

After what felt like forever, when the last shell bounced on the ground near my head, all was quiet. I slowly peered out from the small pile of spent ammunition and debris that had collected around me to see Sal fuming and scanning her surroundings, steam rising off her skin like the smoke billowing from the snout of her gun.

"You ok?" she asked without looking at me.

"I guess?" I answered, slowly dragging myself to my feet, glass and wood chips tumbling off of me.

After a minute or two spent surveilling the carnage, Sal slung her shotgun over one shoulder and turned to frown at me.

"Whatever you've got yourself into, looks like it's heavier than normal."

I nodded, shaking a small tree branch from my ear. This case was already turning out to be more interesting than I preferred.

[xerroburgr]

so, I was on the IA wiki in my last period and I saw another person calling jean a femboy, they even called klevin a femboy. THEY ARENT FEMBOYS STOP IT

[raventroll80]

G/T July

Day 7: Theif

Characters: Newt, Klevin, and Biggs.

After a less than stellar borrowing expedition results in which Newt and their friends are spotted, Newt tries to fix the situation. But how will it go for our little theif?

Newt had been cooped up in their hollow the entire day. After their argument with Klevin, Newt had been feeling terrible for endangering their friends. They wished they had been able to explain why they did it to Klevin, but Newt couldn’t bring themselves to speak up last night.

Biggs had come by to try and talk to them but Newt didn’t even answer the door. They were too ashamed to. Klevin was right, they had been reckless and now everyone was in danger. The was no way they could fix this…

Or was there?

Newt looked at their teddy, the whole reason for this mess. It’s little sewn in eye’s staring back at them. It meant so much to them, but was it worth it? Newt sighed and gently put it in their bag, and slung it over their shoulder before wrapping themselves in their cloak and left their hollow.

“Hey bud, need a favour from ya,” They gave Stoney a pat, waking him from his nap.

“Mrrrwp?”

“Need you to take me to the bean’s house, I have something I need to do…”

“Mrrrr…” Stoney trilled as he picked up Newt and placed them on his head.

—————————————————————————

About an hour later the two had arrived at their destination. Stoney opened the gate and walked into the garden only to stop when he noticed a suspiciously round mossy rock.

“Mrrooo?”

“Mrrrb?” The rock replied. It was Gourdy, another rock sprite who had frequented the house’s garden when the old man had lived there.

Stoney and Gourdy sat and talked to each other, Stoney none the wiser of Newt’s silent departure. Newt scaled up the windowsill and turned to look at her friend one last time.

“Bye bud…”

Newt quickly made their way across the kitchen and entered their hole in the wall. Through the walls they ran. Tap, tap, tap, the sound of their echoed through their tunnels. Newt slowly jogged down the makeshift stairs down to the basement.

The basement was quite and Newt was partially grateful that the bean wasn’t there. Newt lowered themselves onto the workbench and approached the workspace. Newt took their bag off and took out their beloved teddy. They set the small bear down on top of a pair of gloves where the bean would be able to find it.

Newt sighed and sat down on small wooden block and waited for the bean to come. Hopefully they’d make it quick.

—————————————————————————

After he had cooled off, Klevin had realized that he may had been a bit too harsh on Newt. Yes, Newt had been reckless, but Klev didn’t even give them a chance to explain themselves, and the fact neither him nor Biggs had seen them all day was worrying.

As the two approached Newt’s Hollow they noticed that Stoney wasn’t there, but it wasn’t uncommon for him to wander off. It was when Newt didn’t answer their door for the second time did they start to worry.

Trying the doorknob, Klev and Biggs were greeted to an empty house with Newt nowhere in sight.

“Where are they?” Klevin asked looking around the hollow for clues.

“I don’t know,”

“You don’t think… no,”

“Klev, where’s the bear?”

“Shit.”

————————————————————————

Waiting for the bean was a lot more boring than Newt thought it would be. They didn’t know how long it had been but it felt like forever. Growing bored of waiting for their impending doom, Newt looked around for something to do.

Wandering about the workspace, Newt decided to see what the bean had been working on last night. They appeared to be carvings of animal adventurers, there was a badger, a raccoon, a mouse, and an opossum.

They also found a tiny hand carved sword though to Newt it was the perfect size. Picking up the sword, Newt swung it around slashing at imaginary foes.

“Well I’ll be damned, there really is a tiny human in my house,” a voice sounded from behind them. Newt jumped as a chill ran down their spine.

Newt dropped the sword and and raised their hands and started backing away, “I’m sorry, I-I didn’t mean to take anything important,”

“And what would that have been?”

“the bear…”

The bean looked at the tiny teddy bear, it was the same one that the tiny person had ran off with the other night. It was the teddy he had taken from the house when he was younger.

He hadn’t really cared that it was stolen. He was far more interested in the thief who took it, and now that thief was right in front of him. All four inches of them… what were they?

The bean turned his attention to the little thief. He looked them up and down taking in their appearance. They were wrapped in a dark green cloak, mostly obscuring them. But from what he could tell they had short fluffy hair that stuck out from under their hood. The same hair also covered their tail though not as short.

Bright brown eyes stared back at him, wide and fearful. Their gaze often flickered between him and the bear. Watching, waiting the bean to move.

“Well I appreciate the gesture, you returning the bear that is. But, I don’t mind if you take it,” Newt stared at the bean confused, why wasn’t he upset? Why wasn’t he trying to kill them?

“You’re… not upset?” They whispered.

“No, Why would I? I’m honestly just glad I’m not crazy, I mean just look at you!” The bean said as he scooped up the little thief.

Newt yelped as they were lifted into the air. Newt tried to scramble out of the bean’s hands but he quickly cupped his hands to keep them from falling. Newt gripped the bean’s fingers and bared their teeth. Newt’s eyes darted around, and in a moment panic Newt bit into the bean’s hand.

The Bean dropped Newt and pulled his hand away. Newt had the wind knocked out of them as they hit the workbench. As they gasped for air, Newt saw the bean put on his gloves and reached for them once more.

The bean watched as the little thief covered their head and curled in on themselves when he had reached for them.

“I’m sorry! Please don’t hurt me…” they whimpered as he cupped them in his hands. He felt bed for scaring the little thing, and he could tell they didn’t want to be here.

He carried the little thief out to the garden. He had noticed muddy boot prints on his counter earlier, which was what alerted him that the little thief had returned.

As the bean stepped out the back door he stopped in his tracks when he saw Stoney standing in his garden.

“… what?” Stoney and Gourdy both turned towards the bean, “oh… there’s two.”

“Mrrroo?”

“Stoney?” Newt whimpered. The bean looked down at them before looking back to the two stone spirits, who were trying their best to pretend that they hadn’t been seen.

Walking up to the two rocks, the bean looked Stoney over before laying Newt down in front of him. Stoney, who was currently pretending not to see the bean, opened his eyes and looked down at Newt then to the bean.

“Mrrroow” Stoney trilled as he scooped up Newt before looking back to the bean.

The bean gave a nervous nod to the living rock, hoping it wasn’t going to hurt the little thief. To his relief the stone gave the tiny a hug before waddling over to the gate to the garden. The bean followed him and opened the gate for the strange creature.

The rock scurried out of the garden with alarming speed. Before the bean could even blink Stoney was gone in the trees.

“Uhhh… goodbye?”

The bean closed the gate but didn’t lock it. He passed the second rock spirit choosing not to acknowledge it for now. He hoped he hadn’t frightened the little thief too much, he had so many questions.

“Who were they? Why did they return the bear? Why was it so important to them? Why are the rocks alive?” He thought to himself as he dug out a bandaid to put on his bite.

————————————————————————

Biggs and Klev were about to cross the field when they saw Stoney running towards them.

“Stoney! Have you seen Newt? They aren’t in their hollow,” Biggs shouted as their friend drew near.

“Mmrroo,” he trilled, holding Newt above his head.

“Newt!” The two exclaimed as their friend was deposited on the ground.

“Are you alright? What happened?”

“I’m fine… I just needed to do something,”

“What do you mean?” Klevin asked growing concerned, “why is your mouth bloody?”

“Don’t worry about it, let’s just go,”

“Did you bite the bean?”

“He grabbed me, so I bit him.”

“Nice,” Biggs commented giving Newt a pat on the back.

“No! Not nice!” Newt’s shoulders slumped when they heard Klev retort.

“Look Newt, I’m sorry about last night… I’m just glad you’re alright,”

“…thanks,” Newt mumbled as they started walking home. Klevin looked at Biggs who shrugged.

“Hey, the bakery just reopened for the year… did you want to go see what they have in stock?” He offered. Newt waited for a moment considering the offer.

“Sure, I could go for a pastry or two,”

The four friends set off down the trail to Rootbank, with our little thief leading the charge. In the skies above grey clouds began to form, the smell of rain wafting down from the north.

[docrotten]

BILLY THE KID VERSUS DRACULA (1966) – Episode 170 – Decades Of Horror: The Classic Era

“Here. [hands Billy whiskey] A little something to take the soreness out. … I think I’ll join you. I don’t feel too good myself.” Always follow the doctor’s orders! Join this episode’s Grue-Crew – Chad Hunt, Daphne Monary-Ernsdorff, Doc Rotten, and Jeff Mohr – as they saddle up for a rip-roaring ride out west with Billy the Kid Versus Dracula (1966)! Giddyup, Grue Believers!

Decades of Horror: The Classic Era Episode 170 – Billy the Kid Versus Dracula (1966)

Join the Crew on the Gruesome Magazine YouTube channel! Subscribe today! And click the alert to get notified of new content! https://youtube.com/gruesomemagazine

Decades of Horror The Classic Era is partnering with THE CLASSIC SCI-FI MOVIE CHANNEL, THE CLASSIC HORROR MOVIE CHANNEL, and WICKED HORROR TV CHANNEL Which all now include video episodes of The Classic Era! Available on Roku, AppleTV, Amazon FireTV, AndroidTV, Online Website. Across All OTT platforms, as well as mobile, tablet, and desktop. https://classicscifichannel.com/; https://classichorrorchannel.com/; https://wickedhorrortv.com/

Dracula travels to the American West, intent on making a beautiful ranch owner his next victim. Her fiance, outlaw Billy the Kid, finds out about it and rushes to save her.

  Directed by: William Beaudine

Writer: Carl K. Hittleman (as Carl Hittleman)

Selected Cast:

John Carradine as Count Dracula / posing as James Underhill

Chuck Courtney as William ‘Billy the Kid’ Bonney

Melinda Casey as Elizabeth (Betty) Bentley (credited as Melinda Plowman)

Virginia Christine as Eva Oster

Walter Janovitz as Franz Oster (as Walter Janowitz)

Bing Russell as Dan ‘Red’ Thorpe

Olive Carey as Dr. Henrietta Hull

Roy Barcroft as Sheriff Griffin

Hannie Landman as Lisa Oster

Richard Reeves as Pete – Saloonkeeper

Marjorie Bennett as Mary Ann Bentley

William Forrest as The Real James Underhill

George Cisar as Joe Flake

Harry Carey Jr. as Ben Dooley

Leonard P. Geer as Yancy (as Lennie Geer)

William Challee as Tom – Station Agent (as William Chalee)

Charlita as Nana – Indian Maiden

Max Kleven as Sandy Newman (as Max Klevin)

Jack Williams as Duffy

The subgenre of horror-westerns is not often used. In 1966, however, Embassy Pictures released a pair of this mixed breed on a groovy double feature. Joining Jesse James Meets Frankenstein’s Daughter (1966) is tonight’s feature discussion, Billy the Kid Versus Dracula (1966). Both of these genre mashups are directed by William Beaudine. Once again, Dracula is portrayed by John Carradine (House of Frankenstein, 1944; House of Dracula, 1945) and you might also recognize Chuck Courtney, who plays Billy the Kid, from (Pet Sematary, 1989). From there the cast becomes a who’s who of TV and Film Westerns character actors, putting Jeff in his happy place!

Carradine once said this film was “the worst movie he ever acted in.” The Grue-Crew may have other thoughts. Check it out now and let us know what you think of this bizarre and fun blend of genres. 

At the time of this writing, Billy the Kid Versus Dracula is available for streaming from several different sources. The Grue Crew found the best resolution on the Classic Horror Movie Channel and Kanopy, but, among others, it can also be found on Tubi and Plex. The film is available on physical media as a Blu-ray from Kino Lorber.

Gruesome Magazine’s Decades of Horror: The Classic Era records a new episode every two weeks. Up next in their very flexible schedule, as chosen by Jeff, is Beyond the Time Barrier (1960), directed by Edgar G. Ulmer (The Black Cat, 1934) and starring Robert Clarke (The Hideous Sun Demon, 1958).

Please let them know how they’re doing! They want to hear from you – the coolest, grooviest fans: leave them a message or leave a comment on the Gruesome Magazine YouTube channel, the site, or email the Decades of Horror: The Classic Era podcast hosts at feedback@gruesomemagazine.com

To each of you from each of them, “Thank you so much for watching and listening!”

Check out this episode!

[motorsport-magazin]

DTM 2023: Training Lausitzring am Samstagmorgen - Top 10

Ergebnis Training Lausitzring am 19.08.2023 09:00: 1. #14 Jack Aitken – Ferrari – Emil Frey 2. #92 Mirko Bortolotti – Lamborghini – SSR Performance 3. #22 Lucas Auer – Mercedes – Team Winward 4. #3 Klevin v.d. Linde – Audi – Abt Sportsline 5. #7 Ricardo Feller – Audi – Abt Sportsline 6. #1 Sheldon v.d. Linde – BMW – Schubert Motorsport 7. #69 Thierry Vermeulen – Ferrari – Emil Frey 8. #63 Clemens…

[realhankmccoy]

Woman goes all Nietzsche, decides she's a lion and founds a for-profit cult. Fairly typical for white cultures, which loves the way their Nietzsche excuse them to act like they're above others on a food chain. Just think what a huge piece of shit you have to be to really see your own species as prey. That's cannibalism, and the status quo folks of the American empire and Trumps of cuck actually fetishise it just like their masters did.

[shqiperialive]

Klevin Halili dhe Trejsi Sejdini rrëfejnë shumë për njëri-tjetrin!

Klevin Halili dhe Trejsi Sejdini rrëfejnë shumë për njëri-tjetrin!

“Më lër të flas” është një nga programet më të ndjekura të momentit, ku tashmë ka nisur dhe sezonin e dytë me  po të njëjtët moderator Romeo dhe Donald Veshaj.Të ftuar në pjesën e dytë të emisionit të mbrëmjes së sotme ishin modelja e njohur Trejsi Sejdini dhe fotografi i njohur Klevin Halili për të na treguar më shumë rreth jetës së tyre private dhe rrëfime eksluzive. Si janë takuar Klevin dhe…

[strongfemaleprotagonistfan]

YES WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT THIS!!!!! I was actually thinking about this a couple of nights ago and mega menace has a nice ring to it but I feel like it doesn’t fit their vibe??? But Im not sure about Pallison or Alitrick either so >_>???? Klalison is def the way to go for my boy klevin tho!!!!

[xhemilbeharaj]

Mbi protestën e gazetarëve

Mbi protestën e gazetarëve

Nga Habjon Hasani/ 1. Reagimi i shoqatave të gazetarisë për rastin Klevin Muka është standard i dyfishtë sepse të njëjtat shoqata kane heshtur kur për herë të parë kjo masë anormale u aplikua mbi gazetaren Ambrozia Meta. 2. E mira është që kur të gjykojmë mbi reporterët duhet të bëjmë një ndarje me bisturi; raporti i reporterëve me zyrtaret publikë dhe raporti i reportereve me pronarët e…

[the-former-dreamweaver-genie]

Sorry if it was a strong ask, but thank you for answering! I can ask a lighter question, like besides master Lateef who would you consider a friend in dream weavers?

"no no its alright" he said kindly, wave his hand slightly, embarrassed to to think he made them upset about a simple question

"you are just wondering about my past, I should know it helps to talk about it...now for my friends..hmm...I do usually perfer to talk to Kosoko. my best freind, Mazi and Zikomo...some times Klevin and Cyrus "

[keyn-jender-bite]

The Darkness is Darkening Further and Now There's Risks Involved in the City

part one part two

Still brushing flecks of broken glass and leaves off my coat and out of my pockets, I descended the crooked and trashy entrance to the city subway—a convoluted and circuitous maze of stops, stations, tunnels and hallways where the denizens of the night thrived.

Somewhere out there, Aurora Hildebrandt's fiancee, Klevin Morose was missing. Whether they left of their own volition or were abducted, I couldn't be sure. What I did know, was somebody was willing to take shots at me to hinder my investigation. Even a chiseled, dyed-in-the-wool private dick like me could be shaken by attempted murder, and shaken I was.

My destination was one professor Klevin's laboratory at the University of The Big City, in the central education district. I would do some snooping around to see what there was to see, and maybe discover what is truly every detective's bread and butter: clues.

I jumped the turnstile because paying for public transportation is bunk, and casually entered the nearest subway car—a heavily graffitied hulk of filthy metal that once was shiny and new. Taking a seat in the largely empty car, I spent the trip re-reading the article Thyme had published about the professor's electrical work.

"What are you reading, cutey?" a deep voice vibrated at me from across the car. Accustomed as I was to come-ons, I kept reading unfazed.

"What color eyes you hiding beneath that fedora?" the voice asked, coming closer.

Despite my obvious disinterest, a dark-blue gloved hand reached in front of me and pushed down the magazine. Looking up, I took in the sight before me.

The person wasn't very tall, but they were wide. Dark and handsome, they were dressed head to toe in a deep blue three-piece suit, complete with gloves, spats and a wide-brimmed hat. Their eyes were obscured behind dark blue sunglasses. A lit cigarillo dangled precipitously from their lips.

"What are your pronouns, cutey?" they asked, taking the seat beside me.

"You're clucking up the wrong hen-house." I quipped, raising one hand and extending my pointer finger to tap gently on the pin decorating my lapel with shades of green, white, grey and black.

The person leaned back, sighing slightly. "Cracks! An aro." they lamented, snapping their gloved fingers.

"And ace to boot." I added.

Of a sudden, their posture settled. Their chest deflated slightly and their mouth lost its grin.

"My apologies. I feel embarrassed. I should have noticed your pin. Now I feel awkward." they said, leaning back.

"Apology accepted. My pronouns are they, them. Yours?" I felt a little bad for the person, but I also don't cotton to unsolicited advances typically, especially in the dark of the night, alone on the subway in this cramped and dangerous city.

"He him, I'm just a boring old he him." he sighed again, looking at the ceiling of the car, hands dead in his lap.

"Hey now, it doesn't work that way." I assured him, closing the magazine and turning a bit. "You're being your authentic self. There's nothing less boring than authenticity in a world of actors walking around like phonies and lying to themselves. What's your name?"

"Dillinger Radiator. Friends call me Dill. I don't know, being a fat, cis guy and lugging around these he him pronouns just feels so, trite? Cliche? There's a lot of baggage involved, you know what I mean?"

I nodded. "I know what you mean. We've all got luggage to carry. If it's any consolation, and I'm not saying this to be nice, but as an aesthetist, you're very good looking, and you have quite the personal fashion sense."

"You'll forgive me if I say that doesn't mean a heck of a lot coming from an aro-ace." Dill chuckled.

"No offense taken." I smiled.

"What's your name?" he asked, extinguishing his cigarillo on the bench beside him and gently folding it inside a dark blue handkerchief before sliding it into his breast pocket.

"Apple Magistrate, P.I."

"What?"

"Apple Magist—"

"No, I heard you. It's just. It's bad."

"Sorry, what? Bad? Bad meaning, like, cool?"

"No. Bad meaning not good. That is not a good name."

I shrugged. "It's my name. Does the P.I at the end get me any points?"

"I mean—it's a little on the nose with your whole getup." he motioned up and down with his broad hand. "I honestly thought you were cosplaying when I saw you get on the car."

"That's fair, I'll take that."

"Do you have a card?"

I nodded, reaching into my pocket and handing him one of my well-worn business cards.

"The kerning on this is terrible!" he gasped. "How—did you go out of your way to do that? It's, it's just so bad."

"What can I say? I'm a hard-as-nails private dick, not a type-setter.

"No, of course, but—I mean look at it, Jesus. It's just so obviously almost illegibly bad. Do you rely on these to like, get business? Are you okay? Do you need money?" he began to reach into his pocket to take out some chips when I reached out my hand to stop him.

"This is my stop. I enjoyed talking with you, even with your casually offensive honesty. I appreciate your candor. Give me a call at that number if you want to get coffee sometime as friends. I don't have an answering machine, so you'll have to catch me when I'm in." I said with a tip of my fedora before sidling out of the subway onto the education district platform.

"How are you still in business?!" I could hear him yell as the doors slid shut and the train rolled away down the tracks.

Every night was an adventure all its own in this great big city. You never knew who you were going to meet next.