#kudos the kobold

[ohnoitspheo]

Meet Kudos the Kobold! 🦎🍳🔥

I finally managed to wiggle my way into a Dungeons and Dragons group and I wanted to play a little guy!

Hopefully a lot of fun shenanigans ensue.

[fluffyquill]

The rare pair no one saw coming! Can I offer you some Scratch/Gwyndolin in these trying times?

Maybe I’ll do Grabalba/Fable too.

I have… thoughts about episode 9, but I’m gonna wait until the finale to screech about it. But oh, to be a humble kobold Warlock and then a cute Fey girl declares: “I CHOOSE YOU.”

[brabe]

OH MY GOD IT HIM!!!!!

so KOBOLD, the blue member of the infinitors,

actually appeared before in season 3 episodes 14 and 25 as one of the 316 teenagers rescued from the orphanage and then brought to the meta-human youth center in taos

i’ll expose myself and say that i’m not hawk-eyed or anything and the single reason i’ve noticed this blink-and-you’ll-miss-it uber-background character before is because every time i’ve done a young justice rewatch in the last 3 years and he appeared on screen for a full 5 seconds i’ve been mentally referring to him as hot blue dude!!! 

i’ve wondered who he was and had googled him right away but it was fruitless, apparently he isn’t based on any dc character.

stoked to meet him at last 👀

[kimboatfloats]

2023 D&D the Reckoning

So it’s a new year and the news was that shit hit the fan (kudos to Linda Codega for writing these articles). Hasbro and Wizards of the Coast had their Open Gaming License 2.0 leaked and it was an awful pile of stinking shit designed to be wiped all over the faces of creators. Other people have written some great write-ups explaining it.

Ever since I’ve been seeing amazing posts from creators in the community doubling down on opening up their own licenses for their systems. Cypher System, Pathfinder, and Ironsworn/Starforged are some of the notable ones.

Matt Colville and MCDM, Kobold Press, and a bunch of others are looking to build their own systems.

The Open Gaming Wikipage has been updated.

There’s a massive open letter to open D&D:

And I just have been schadenfreuding the whole thing.

[celsidebottom]

Keeping Up with the Kobolds

Chapter 7: Relieved Reunions

Cel is working day and night on a cure for the blue veins that sprawl across Wilde's skin, but will they make it in time? What will happen to the kobolds if their friend doesn't make it?

The final chapter!!  Thank you to everyone who read this and left comments and shared it, it means a lot.  I had so much fun writing this fic and I’m really glad that people liked it!! <3

(Continued content warning for quarantine and infections)

Head on over to AO3, or read this chapter below!

Chapter 1 (tumblr) (AO3)

Four days passed.  The kobolds maintained their post outside Wilde’s cell, watching in dismay as they were still unable to help their friend and companion.  At least Wilde got good food in quarantine, since Klak and their other chefs continued to cook meals for the whole group.  It was better than whatever slop the human chef had formerly prepared for anyone stuck in the cells.

There was no good way to pass the time until his death, so Wilde found himself knitting a lot after asking one of the kobolds to bring him his supplies.  He wasn’t sure if it would ever be safe to give away the sweaters he made, in case they carried some trace of the disease he bore, but what else was he going to do?  Sit and wait and mope until he asked Zolf to kill him, to spare him the ultimate fate of the blue veins?

No, he would do something, keep his mind off of it.  The only problem was that when knitting, Wilde couldn’t ignore the blue veins in his hand anymore and how they spread across his skin.  The blue was deeper and laced along him like an unwound skein of yarn.

Znal took well to leadership.  After getting over their initial guilt and fear, they’d soon become a been a bit of a ringleader, but now, when everyone was feeling the despair, they really stepped up to console the other kobolds and make sure that they all ate and slept as they needed.  Meanwhile, Klak was rarely in the quarantine area, and instead had taken to cooking away the grief.  And right next to Wilde’s cell, curled up against the bars so tightly that they left marks in their scales, was Eep.  They held onto their tail with one hand and reached their other through the bars, almost never moving, hoping beyond hope that Wilde would reach out and hold them again like he had when their nightmares struck.

“Excuse me, buddies!”

Every head looked up as Cel stepped carefully through the kobolds to reach Wilde.  “I did it!  We did it!  It’s done!  A cure!”

“Are you sure?”

“Are you really willing to wait for me to run more tests?”

“Good point.”

Hamid, Azu, and Zolf joined Cel as they were pulling out a syringe filled with a pale blue liquid.

“Give me your arm.”

Wilde obliged and allowed Cel to inject him with whatever serum they had developed.  They were right – even if it didn’t work, he didn’t have anything more to lose at that point.

“Please work, please work…” Zolf muttered quietly.  Hamid laced his arm through Zolf’s while Azu put a hand on each of their shoulders, squeezing them tightly with anticipation.

“How long?”  Wilde asked.

“Shh, shh, science is happening,” Cel explained.

Wilde needn’t have worried.  A few seconds later the veins began to fade, withdrawing into his hand where they’d started before disappearing entirely.

“You did it!”

“They did it!”

“I did it!”

“Thank you,” Wilde exclaimed, unable to stop smiling and letting tears flow freely now.

“I think I have a vaccine ready too.  But we’ll worry about that later.  First, let’s get you out of there.”

Zolf was already opening the cell and threw the door wide open so that he could hug Wilde.

“Don’t you dare go almost dying on me again,” Zolf insisted.

“No guarantees.”

“Smug piece of…”  Despite his words, Zolf was grinning ear to ear.

Zolf stepped to the side to allow Wilde out of the cell just in time to avoid being barreled over by twenty kobolds, who all sprinted at their previously imprisoned friend and tackled him to the ground.  He practically smacked his head on the cot, but he didn’t care.  He held onto each of the kobolds and hugged them, laughing and smiling as he did so.

“I’m alright!”  He cried as kobolds climbed all over him in glee.  “Couldn’t get rid of me that easily, could you!  Oh, I’m so glad I get to stay, I wouldn’t want to miss any of your ridiculous antics for anything.  I love you, each and every one of you.”

In the corner, Azu, Hamid, Cel, and Zolf watched the scene with smiles on their faces.

“Thank you, Cel,” Zolf said quietly.  “Thank you for saving him.  I know it’s not just about him, it’s about everyone, but… well, you know.”

“I’m happy to help.  And watch him get swarmed by kobolds.”

“Do you think he’s okay?”  Hamid asked.  “I can’t tell if he’s screaming with happiness or terror.”

Azu chuckled.  “I think he’ll be just fine.”

Meanwhile, Wilde hadn’t moved from the floor, taking the time to hug each kobold and tell them how much they meant to him.

“Thank you,” Wilde said softly to all of the waiting eyes once he’d made the rounds, “for letting me be part of your family.”

The horde squeaked with excitement while Znal surveyed the situation with satisfaction and Eep held onto Wilde’s hand.  This time, none of them would ever have to let go.

[bookshelfpassageway]

I’m not sure why the “token generator” features for HeroForge 2.0 are being developed for a premium price. What you do, is you center your camera on top the character, screenshot with the site button, and check the box marked “cutout”.

there, instant roll20. Shove it in your favorite art program, set it to “multiply”, color that sucker in, if you wanted to be snazzy about it

[internutter]

Challenge #03257-H348: You and Your Weird Customs

Societies have ways of signaling preferences, or status. From the all black "Widow's Weeds", that said "do not approach" to the earring in the left ear and red shirt that said "I'm gay and approachable", with so many varieties of possible interaction. How about a story of a "Meet and Chat" for All comers. Keep it "G" rated, Kudos for humorous.

With open minds what happens when two completely not interactive just chat about Life, and they don't even have to be the same Species. Just for fun fact. Some birds are multiple hatchers of everybody's eggs. -- Nonny the Mouse.

Whistlemine was one of the more interesting areas of the greater world. Instead of viewing Kobolds as pests or enemies to eliminate, the Humans realised very quickly that the little buggers could be very useful indeed. For instance, digging the ventilation shafts that gave their little mining town its name.

When the winds blew the right way, various mines would strike up chords.

Therefore, the local Kobolds were welcome citizens of Whistlemine and given far more respect than they would have expected anywhere else. So much so that calling them "trash dragons" was a criminal offense and the offended Kobolds could sue. They were also very good at assisting in unearthing anything at all of value.

[Check the source to see the full story]

[cmweller]

Challenge #03257-H348: You and Your Weird Customs

Societies have ways of signaling preferences, or status. From the all black "Widow's Weeds", that said "do not approach" to the earring in the left ear and red shirt that said "I'm gay and approachable", with so many varieties of possible interaction. How about a story of a "Meet and Chat" for All comers. Keep it "G" rated, Kudos for humorous.

With open minds what happens when two completely not interactive just chat about Life, and they don't even have to be the same Species. Just for fun fact. Some birds are multiple hatchers of everybody's eggs. -- Nonny the Mouse.

Whistlemine was one of the more interesting areas of the greater world. Instead of viewing Kobolds as pests or enemies to eliminate, the Humans realised very quickly that the little buggers could be very useful indeed. For instance, digging the ventilation shafts that gave their little mining town its name.

When the winds blew the right way, various mines would strike up chords.

Therefore, the local Kobolds were welcome citizens of Whistlemine and given far more respect than they would have expected anywhere else. So much so that calling them "trash dragons" was a criminal offense and the offended Kobolds could sue. They were also very good at assisting in unearthing anything at all of value.

[Check the source to see the full story]

[bonkusdonkus]

So I finally got around to reading the new Draconic Options Unearthed Arcana, and it is... Certainly a thing that exists!

In all seriousness, I’m happy that WotC has finally realized they did the draconic races kinda dirty, and they’re coming back around to try and fix em’ up a bit, kudos for that.

But maybe they could try just a liiiiiitle harder? Maybe I’m being kinda harsh, but the Chromatic and Metallic Dragonborn seem sorta bare bones to me, outside of their breath weapon actually scaling as they level. As for the new Kobolds, honestly old Kobolds were better, if you just took away the strength penalty. (I do like the new flavor text though, that’s pretty cool.)

The best race in this whole thing are the Gem Dragonborn. They’ve actually got some cool abilities like free telepathy and temporary flight.

I also really like some of the new dragon themed spells, very cool stuff.

But, a lot the stuff in this thing feels like it needs some extra oomph, the feats and races especially. I don’t know, I’m hardly a D&D expert, I’ve only been playing the game for about two years or so, and I’m definitely not a professional game designer, so take everything I’m saying with a big ol’ grain of salt. I just feel like if WotC really is trying to fix up the Draconic races, I feel like we need a little more than a few resistance buffs and such to get the job done.

[magic-and-moonlit-wings]

[pterodactyl screech]

The AO3 listing of Becoming the Mask has surpassed 1000 comments and is close to 1000 kudos!

Big thanks to @gold-kobold, who left the 1000th and 1001st comments, and @eurydykakaput for leaving the 999th!

[ohnoitspheo]

OK. I’m losing it over how SMALL my D&D character and Main Character are! 🥺✨

They’re so SMALL! 😭

[tessatechaitea]

Cerebus #15 (1980)

If the story so far had revealed that Cerebus has a vagina, I could make a hentai joke here.

The first time I encountered hentai was at an anime convention at a Red Lion Inn in San Jose in 1994 or 1995. I went to the convention by myself because I had recently fallen in love with the cartoon Sailor Moon and wanted to get some Sailor Moon LaserDiscs unless it was actually Sailor Moon dolls I wanted. It was so long ago, how am I supposed to remember?! They had a room where they were showing movies and one of the movies I watched was Sailor Moon R: The Movie. It was subtitled which was great because then I had the story memorized for all the times I watched my non-subtitled LaserDisc. But that wasn't the pornographic anime I saw! I don't even remember what that was but I watched some tentacle fucking movie late at night in a dark room with a bunch of other sweaty nerds. I didn't know that was what was going to happen though so I didn't have my dick in my hands like the other guys probably did. I was as shocked as anybody when they first find out that cartoons where women get fucked by tentacles exist! I mean, how many penises does an alien need?! I grew up thinking the little gray aliens had zero! That Red Lion Inn was the same one where I played in a couple of Magic the Gathering tournaments. Being in a dark room with a bunch of horny anime fans was less awkward and uncomfortable than playing Magic the Gathering against Magic the Gathering fans. Most of them probably couldn't believe they were actually playing against such a cool and handsome dude. It really threw them off their game when I would say things like, "Yeah, I've touched a couple of boobs. I attack with my Serra Angel." I know what you're thinking: "Anime, comic books, and Magic the Gathering?! This awesome dude must have owned every single Stars Wars figure too!" Aw, you're too kind! I'm blushing! But obviously I never owned Yak Face. "A Note from the Publisher" is still being published so I guess Dave and Deni are still married. In his Swords of Cerebus essay, Dave Sim discusses "Why Groucho?" It seems to mostly come down to this: Dave Sim enjoyed the characters of Groucho Marx as a teenager and memorized a lot of their lines. He also mentions Kim Thompson's review of Cerebus in The Comic Journal (the first major review of the series) in which Kim praised Sim's ability to make his parody characters transcend the parody to become unique creations of their own. This review gave Sim the confidence to put Groucho in the role of Lord Julius. Which worked out so well that Sim later adds Oscar Wilde, Ernest Hemingway, F. Scott Fitzgerald, Margeret Thatcher, Mick Jagger, Keith Richards, Woody Allen, Dave Sim, and the Three Stooges into the story. I'm sure I'm missing some but I can't remember every aspect of this 6000 page story. Was The Judge also a parody of somebody? Was the Regency Elf based on Wendy Pini? I don't know! I'm sure I'm missing a lot of references in Cerebus simply because I haven't experienced all the same knowledge sources as Dave Sim. Just like I'm missing a super duper lot of references in Gravity's Rainbow because nobody in the history of ever has experienced all the same knowledge sources as Thomas Pynchon. I've been reading Gravity's Rainbow (for the first time but also the third time because I'm basically reading it three times at the same time. You'll understand when you read it) and I'm surprised by how funny it is. I don't think anybody ever described it as funny or else I'm sure I would never have stopped reading it multiple times prior to this time when I'm actually going to finish it. Although I suppose when I read Catch-22, I had done so on my own so nobody ever told me how funny that book was either. But for some reason, Catch-22 lets you know it's going to be a funny book pretty quickly. Gravity's Rainbow is all, "Here is a description of an evacuation of London which is just stage setting because, you know, the bombs have already blown up, but it makes people feel safe. And after that, how about a scene where this guy makes a bunch of banana recipes for breakfast. Is that funny enough for you?" Oh, sure, there are some funny moments like when that one guy pretends a banana is his cock and then some other guys tackle him and beat him with his own pretend cock. But there's a gravity to the scene that doesn't lend itself to the reader thinking, "Oh, this is a funny book!" But if you make it far enough, you start realizing, "Hey! I'm not understanding this!" So then you reread the section and you start realizing, "Hey! I'm laughing at this stuff! This is pretty funny!" Plus there are a lot of descriptions of sexy things that I'm assuming are really accurate because Pynchon is obsessed with details.

Anyway, I was supposed to be talking about Cerebus, wasn't I?

A Living Priest of Tarim crashes Lord Julius' bath to scold him about a party Julius is giving in a fortnight (which is the amount of time your kid has lost to a video game). I don't know why the priest has to declare he's a living priest. You can tell that by the way he's shouting and foaming at the mouth. Although this is a Swords & Sorcery book so I suppose there are many dead creatures that also shout and foam at the mouth. Sometimes I forget I'm reading a fictional book and wind up ranting and raving about stuff that I'm supposed to just assume is fine. Like when I read The Flash and nothing in it makes any sense at all because The Flash should never have any trouble stopping crime or saving people from natural disasters. The comic book should be over in two pages. Even the writers, at some point, realized how ridiculous Flash stories were and decided the only way to make them believable was to have The Flash battle other super fast people. But that just meant Flash stories basically became bar-room brawls. Two people with super speed fighting is the same as reading a story about two people without super speed fighting. Boring! Some writers even decided that maybe a telepathic monkey would make things more interesting and I suppose telepathic monkeys make everything more interesting so kudos to them. I was going to go on a long rant about telepathic monkeys but then I realized how much I love the idea of telepathic monkeys so why should I create an argument against them? More telepathic monkeys, please.

This made me laugh out loud. Not as much as the chapter in Gravity's Rainbow where the old woman forces Slothrop to eat a bunch of terrible candies. But then it isn't a competition, is it? I mean, I guess it's a competition for my time which is why I haven't written a comic book review in a week or more. Blame Thomas Pynchon for being so entertaining (and also Apex).

Baskin, the Minister for Executive Planning, has come to let Lord Julius know what the revolutionaries have revealed while being tortured. The only bit of useful information was one prisoner's last words: "Revolution...the pits." Cerebus immediately assumes "the Pits" is a location and not a summation of the prisoner's feelings about revolution which led to torture which led to his death. Cerebus, being the Kitchen Staff Supervisor, begins an investigation into The Pits. His first step: threatening the Priest of the Living Tarim. Which makes me realize I transposed the word "living" in the previous encounter with the priest and went on a digression that makes no sense to anybody who has read and somehow remembers that particular panel. I'm sure they were scoffing and snorting and exclaiming to their pet rat, "What a stupid fool loser this Grunion Guy is! Living Priest of Tarim! HA! Ridiculous! What a moronic mistake! He has made a gigantic fool of himself!" I don't know that the almost certainly imaginary people who called me on my mistake as they read this have a pet rat but I do know there almost certainly isn't another imaginary sentient being in the room with them. Cerebus learns that The Pits are Old Palnu that lies under current Palnu. It was destroyed in a massive earthquake long ago and the new city built over the top of it. It's like a Dungeons & Dragons module but with a lot less treasure.

This scene reminded me that I need to finish rereading The Boomer Bible: A Testament for Our Times (which is what it was called in the 90s but is just as accurate for today).

Cerebus and Lord Julius engage in another typical misunderstanding (it's not hard when only half of the people in the conversation care about making sense) which ends up with Lord Julius deciding that the location for the Festival of Petunias will be The Pits. This complicates Cerebus' job of not allowing Lord Julius to be assassinated because the assassins are most likely housed in The Pits (along with their giant snakes (*see cover)). Lord Julius, Baskin, and Cerebus descend into The Pits to find a suitable location for the Festival of Petunias. In doing so, they wind up in a trap and confronted by a masked revolutionary of the "Eye of the Pyramid." Which is odd because you usually have to murder at least a dozen kobolds and several goblins before you reach the room with the boss in it.

Typical unbalanced beginning level module. A giant snake as the first encounter!

Cerebus manages to defeat the giant snake by crashing it headfirst into a wall. The wall winds up being a key support structure and the roof collapses. Everybody makes it out alive but the masked revolutionary evades capture. He will be back next issue to ruin the Festival of Petunias. Aardvark Comment is still just a mostly standard comic book letters page. I'll probably stop discussing it until people start criticizing Dave. Right now it's just "This comic book is great!" and "Keep writing, Dave, and I'll never think ill of anything idea you espouse!" while Dave replies, "I owe my fans everything! I can't wait until I can stop feeling that way and start jerking off onto my art boards and selling those as pages of Cerebus!" Cerebus #15 Rating: A. Good story, good Lord Julius dialogue, good Living Priest of the Living Tarim scenes. I wholeheartedly endorse this comic book and Dave Sim. No way a guy with a sense of humor like this is going to go off the rails, right?!

[multimask]

I might not have started playing D&D because of Critical Role, but I sure as hell wanted to keep going with it because of CR. My friend group in college was formed because a number of us wanted to learn how to play and/or knew how to play. There were campaigns and such that began and petered out, but Critical Role was a solid presence for me over those few years that I could turn to literally whenever - especially if it wasn’t a game day for any of the games I was playing in.

And now I am running my own campaign bc I saw how much fun the Critical Role crew was having, as well as other live play shows & podcasts (including WotC official ones) that I went and found because I was caught up on CR and wanted more, wanted to see how other people played the game. 

Fuck gatekeepers bitching about the new official WotC Wildemount book. I might not be preordering it bc I’m broke, but I’m so fucking delighted that it exists and it’s definitely a book that I’ll be looking to acquire in the future

I didn’t start my D&D journey with Critical Role, but it was a close thing, and I sure as hell wouldn't have minded if I had actually found CR first. I’ve gotten one of my players into CR, and it’s a wonderful thing bc he’s playing a kobold so we can just shout “11 days!!!” at each other. Another player broke me by tagging gorgeous CR fanart as both CR fanart and as a ref for one of my beloved NPCs. CR is awesome, and serious kudos to Mercer for getting a new world added to the official roster - the first one since Eberron 16 years ago if the posts flying around are accurate.

[dndhomebrewandart]

random encounter prompt; infinite kobold box

You walk into a room. It’s apparently empty except for a large treasure box across the room. Simple enough. Surely there’s some manner of trap in here. You and your friends scour the floor and the wall and the ceiling for traps and find nothing out of place.

How odd. The chest then? On the top of the box it just says Kobolds in bold letters. That’s weird. Well, no traps on the chest either. So that means you open it right? Who doesn’t open a chest in a dungeon?

You open the chest and a continuous stream of angry kobolds burst free of the box of holding and trample over you. Roll initiative….and a Dexterity save while you’re at it. Killing the kobolds isn’t the problem. The problem is they never stop coming out of the box.

(Kudos to my inspiration for this one, @pathfuckery

[wrightmccain00-blog]

Free Sex Games

Anime porn matches are generally developed in Japan and are mostly in Asian, therefore requiring translation. But nothing to be concerned about, our reviewer found out the translation about this particular game is on point. They've put in quite an effort that's visible. Kudos to the crew for a job well done. And now that we're conversing about the translation, allow me to take you through the scenario. She is a dreaded swordswoman who dispatches bad studs, saving adventurers in the procedure, only to demand currency from them as the prize. She then ambles off to another town for similar jobs. While more characters will join the narrative, they will not be joining you as the foot motive is currency, at least in the commencing. Also, you'll be taken thru other battle episodes where she is struggling monsters, investigating the developing city outside the Destroys and in the end, the battle of sexes in the room, tents and a fine deal of other areas. Clearly, you will pick up the story as you advance. In all kinks and shapes, this can be a unspoiled Manga porn game. Glamour ideas budge out of rape, a plenty of of rape and rape. Gamers will spend a sexy lump of the game's commence to build characters, but they will ultimately all turn into intercourse addicts that other characters will use to their own elation. As you will be tasked with fighting the city's underworld and shadowy criminals, the figures you've worked firm to build will not help you fight the evils; rather, they let you view their erogenous parts being ripped apart in highly Glamour gigs, which is the entire point anyway. Makina is a intensity to be reckoned with, albeit our reviewer feels just like most of the characters should interact and be one staff, assisting you to manage over just Makina. But they're nowhere to be found. As a participant, you'll be defeated but luckily, Makina is strenuous, and you just need to have the flawless firearms in your armory, which you will have if you research a bit. The game could be lacking in confident aspects, however it makes up for it with the finer details. To start with, the voluptuous vignettes are unique and suggest a wide diversity of unique views, angles, and postures. Even the lil' deeds of, say, moving a rock, will alter a mettle's dialog and such attention to detail is commendable. The exact same can't be said of this soundtrack, which might leave a bad taste in the mouth. Our reviewer didn't also like the durable switch, which only increases the distortion you experience at the commence of the match. Our reviewer was not struck with the game's lack of selection too. All the damsels are busty, and there's not any single nymph with a diminutive or smaller frame. The women may differ in the very first stages but finally become sexual maniacs. The girls may have came during different events, but they afterward give way to the awakening and perversion of town, losing any personality they may have constructed up to this point. Each of the dolls have smoking torrid bods and not one with a sign of abnormality that would have added a small bit of number. In any case, the doll characters have been presented into the masculine playmates through rape, hypno, hump, stimulants, bribery and other forms of manhandle. All but one connection is begun consensually, and also that you can be brief lived as in succeeding episodes when Kobold rapes Makina. If that is supposed to be a great thing, only you can tell. But one thing is sure, the activity is stiff and hasty at the entirety of the game, and there'll be lil' time to love the guilty gusto. The concentrate is mainly on eroticism, perversity, and enlivenment and this game reaches the objective in that regard. The whole story is well thought out and may even transform individuals who are not aficionados of the genre. sexy practice in general.

[gyrrakavian]

I’ve just spent the last two hours sifting through kobold art in a couple of different image searches.

Kudos to all of the artists who’ve chosen to indicate their female kobold character a shorter and/or narrower snout, slightly broader hips and a thicker tail for sexually dimorphic characteristics and foregoing slapping on a pair of breasts.

Bonus points to the artists who play around with coloration and skin markings/patterns.