#last thing he’ll remember is being on the launch boat with the crew and the NEXT is waking up in THE MIDDLE OF THE OCEAN ALONE

[mycological-mariner]

I’m so mad I just watched the first episode of Hornblower. Only now! After finishing my dissertation! When my dissertation topic was literally the portrayal of epilepsy in film and television

[lady-divine-writes]

Klaine Advent Drabble Challenge 2020 - “Meeting in the Middle” (Rated PG13)

Summary: A petty argument between Kurt and Blaine leads to a heavy confession. (2133 words)

Notes: Written for the @klaineadvent Drabble Challenge 2020 prompt 'meet'. Warning for mention of Blaine’s infidelity and a mention of sexual harassment.

Read on AO3.

“It’s a reindeer.”

“It is not a reindeer.”

“That is absolutely a reindeer.”

Blaine huffs, crossing his arms over his chest and turning away from his husband, leaving enough leeway so that he can still give him a serious case of side-eye. “It can’t be a reindeer!”

“Why not?” Kurt snaps. “Because you say so?”

“Look at those stumpy antlers. Reindeer have huge antlers!”

“How do you know? Huh? Do you suddenly work for Wild America? Did you get an internship you’re not telling me about? Did you take a Learning Annex course?”

“No ...” Blaine gears up for an argument, a bullet-pointed list prepared for his defense perched on the tip of his tongue, waiting to launch. But at the last minute, he shifts in his seat and backs down. “I just … I just … know. All right?”

“Right. Because you know everything.”

“I never said that.”

“You implied it! You’re apparently some unsung expert in the field of zoology! Meanwhile, it seems that the longer we stay married, the less you know me!”

"That's finally something we can agree about!"

"Oh! So you admit you don't know me?"

"No! You don't know me!"

“Maybe I don't know you! But you should know by now that I can’t tank a relationship with a high-profile client every time your ego gets a little bruised!”

"What? Do you honestly think ...?" Blaine stares at his husband - hurt and heartbreak filling his eyes when Kurt doesn't back down, not even an inch. "I'm right," he says sadly, inching away even further. "You don't know me."

“Oh my God!” Santana groans from the back seat. “Can you both put a pause on acting like drama llamas for five seconds!? We are going to die out here! If I don't get to see my wife and daughter again because of you two Necco wafers, I am going to find you guys in the afterlife and ruin every sexual experience you attempt to have!"

"Don't talk to me about being a drama llama," Kurt grumbles. "He's the one who started it."

"Fine," Blaine says, defeated. "I started it. Does that make you feel better? Does that make everything okay again? Because doing this after every Vogue function is getting exhausting." 

"It's not every Vogue function," Kurt concedes. "Just the ones Trevor Atley attends. You know, my new client who's about to elevate my status as a fashion editor? The one you seem to think is always flirting with me?"

"Maybe you should just start leaving me at home."

"Maybe I should!"

"Quit it!" Santana scolds. "Both of you! You're not in high school anymore."

"Thank God," both men mutter in unison.

"Everyone knows the two of you love each other more than your Gucci luggage, so why don't we set the angst aside and focus on the issue at hand. How are we getting out of this mess?"

Neither Kurt nor Blaine answer, staring out their respective windows, doing their best to ignore the problem.

And each other.

Santana sighs in frustration. "Do you two need the number of a good couples' counselor?" she offers. "Because I have one I can give you if it will bring you guys back to reality!”

Kurt and Blaine perk up, turning their attention back to the conversation.

“You and Brittany went to counseling?” Blaine asks.

“Well ... yeah," Santana replies self-consciously. "There’s no shame in that."

"Why?" Kurt asks. "If you don't mind me asking?"

Santana shrugs. She may have minded any other time, but she'll come clean, seeing as this is an emergency. 

"There was a time when Brittany thought the ghost of Lord Tubbington was trying to split us up."

"O-oh," Blaine says. "That's ... interesting."

"I personally thought, you know, it might not be that. That it might be something deeper. So we went to a professional and talked things out.”

“Wow," Kurt says. "That’s very mature of you guys.”

“Yeah, well, we have our moments. I wish it was contagious!"

Kurt and Blaine roll their eyes and retreat to the safety of their corners.

"Look," Santana tries, desperate for a resolution, "I think you guys might be suffering from a good, old-fashioned failure to communicate.”

“And why do you think that?”

“Because most couples do. You spend so much time with one another, you get to a point where you assume you can read each other’s minds. Then you get offended when that’s not the case.”

“So what are we supposed to do about that now? How’s that going to get us out of the hole that we’re in?”

“Why don’t you start one truth at a time? Meet in the middle. Kurt, you reveal something to Blaine, and for every one thing you tell him, he has to tell you one thing back.”

Blaine wraps his arms defiantly over his chest, looking more like a pouting middle schooler than a grown man. “I will if he will." 

"Will you?" Kurt bites. "Because you seem to think there are things I can’t handle before you even tell me what they are!"

"Because you usually go off the deep end no matter what I say! Especially if you think I'm keeping a secret!"

"Well, excuse me, but the last time you kept secrets from me, you’d slept with someone else!"

The car becomes tight with quiet until Blaine sighs. "Fair enough."

"Sometimes I get the feeling that you're waiting for me to do the same," Kurt continues. "That no matter how much I tell you I love you, that I forgive you, you're waiting for me to find an opportunity to hurt you.”

"Ooo. Kurt starts out strong," Santana says, taking it upon herself to moderate. "Blaine? Your turn."

Blaine shoots Santana an unamused look. “I used to feel that way. I'll admit it. Because I thought I would definitely deserve it if you did cheat on me. But that's not the case here. Not with Trevor. The truth is …" Blaine curls against the window a bit, curls in on himself a bit "... I don’t like him. At all. It’s not even a personality thing. He makes me uncomfortable. Like ... Terry Crews … Brendan Fraser … uncomfortable.”

The air around them is tense. It's cold. So cold that Kurt's hands hurt. But he feels none of it.

He feels nothing.

He's gone numb.

Blaine's confession is nowhere in the vicinity of what Kurt expected to hear. He thought for sure that this entire issue surrounded Blaine's jealousy. His insecurity. Kurt's suspicions had been corroborated by reliable sources.

Namely Isabelle.

The Vogue gossip mill didn't work in his favor this time.

But he shouldn't need it. How did he not catch on to this?

“Do you mean to tell me …” Kurt swallows hard, already planning the outfit he’s going to wear when he rips that asshole Trevor a new one “… he touched you?”

“N-not yet.”

“Not yet! What do you mean not yet!?”

“I’ve heard rumors. And he … he looks at me. Makes comments. I know if it came down to it, I could handle myself with him … physically. But there’s so much more to consider."

"Consider? What else is there to consider? What are you weighing against the possibility of sexual assault?" Kurt screeches when he should remain calm, but he can't help himself. He didn't have a clue about this! But he's not just pissed at Trevor.

He's livid at himself.

"I was afraid it would put your job at stake. And my reputation. If I call him out on rumors and I’m wrong, it could tank both of our careers. Neither of us would ever work again. But I don’t want to wait until he does something. I don’t ... I don't want to be touched. Not by him.”

“Oh, honey. Of course not." Kurt puts a hand on Blaine's shoulder and waits, sees if he wants to be comforted. A single touch is all it takes for Blaine to roll towards his husband and melt in his arms. "I'm nice to him because of that stupid contract, but I can't stand him, to be honest. The whole night, I was hoping you would come over, hang all over me, stake your claim like a Neanderthal. It didn't dawn on me that there might be some other reason you were keeping your distance."

"I should have told you.”

Kurt squeezes Blaine tight. “Yes, you should have told me!" 

“I’m sorry, Kurt. I just got … overwhelmed. I was stuck between a rock and a hard place. I didn’t want you to do anything that would jeopardize this contract, but …”

“Blaine! You’re my husband! No contract in the world means more to me than you!”

“I ... didn’t know what to do.”

“I’ll tell you what we’re going to do," Kurt says, his voice shaking with rage. "In the morning, we’re going to call Isabelle, and contact the legal team at Vogue for a consult. Then we’ll hit this asshole with a two-fisted punch. I’ll have my team do an expose, try to find anyone who might be willing to blow the whistle on this guy. But we’ll also run a series of PSAs on sexual harassment, and how it can affect anyone. You’ll be in one of them! That way, even if we never say this guy’s name out loud, he’ll know we have his number. If he doesn’t start backing down after that, then I’ll invite him to an intimate lunch at my office, talk things out one-on-one.”

“Make that two-on-two,” Santana pipes up from the backseat. “It’s more fun when we threaten assholes together, remember?” She offers Kurt her fist to bump, and, caught up in the moment, he does.

Blaine straightens up, finds a tissue to blot his eyes. “You guys don’t have to do all that.”

“Yes, we do!" Kurt says, concerned that his husband would consider backing down from this fight, especially seeing that Kurt was in a similar boat when the two of them first met. At the time, it was Blaine coming to the rescue, back when the only thing at stake was a mark on his so-called permanent record. Now they're older, and the stakes are higher, which is why Kurt has to do everything he can to return the favor. "I’m not standing for this, Blaine! Not in a million years!”

Blaine smiles at his passionate husband, looking more relaxed than he has over the past three weeks of functions and parties. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

Blaine leans forward and gives his husband a kiss - a small kiss at first, but it goes on longer ... and longer, Santana grimacing as she sinks into her seat, praying the leather will swallow her whole and shoot her out the exhaust pipe to freedom. But then the car rocks back and forth, and oh!

How quickly they forget.

Kurt and Blaine get so wrapped up in one another, in love and relief, they don't seem to notice when the car shakes again, more violently.

But Santana, in the middle of sending a text to her wife, pops up.

“Great!" Santana cheers in an anxious voice. "We have a plan to deal with that asshole, and love is the law of the land again! Fantastic! Now - how are we going to handle Rudolph the Red-nosed Roid machine?” She gestures out the window to their original problem, the one they forgot about in the heat of the moment - a giant buck standing in front of Blaine's BMW, head lowered, ramming into the bumper as if attempting to flip them over.

He may have stubby antlers, but he sure knows how to use them.

“We should call 9-1-1," Kurt says.

“I’m calling Triple A," Blaine says.

“What is Triple A going to do?” Kurt snaps.

“I don’t know. But they might be a bit better prepared than 9-1-1.”

“How in the world do you figure that?”

“Because Triple A’s sole purpose is helping motorists out of a jam. They might have deer deterrent or a special horn or something.”

“What!?”

“It makes sense, Kurt!”

“No it doesn’t!”

"And what are the police going to do?"

"Hello? Police have guns!"

“Before the two of you get started again, this is what we’re going to do." Santana points to Blaine. "You call Triple A." She points to Kurt. "You call 9-1-1. Meanwhile, I’m going to save the day.”

“Who are you calling?” Kurt asks.

“Domino's Pizza.”

“And why is that considered saving the day?"

“I'll bet you $50 delivery will not only get here faster, they’ll be packing mace. Plus, they'll bring food. Listening to the two of you bitch really drains the life out of a person.”

[buzzdixonwriter]

Compare & Contrast: Carousel vs Guys And Dolls

A dear departed friend of mine loved Richard Rodgers and Oscar Hammerstein II’s Carousel, and he was far from the only person to do so.

Ever since it opened in 1945, Carousel has been a perennial favorite, revived countless times on Broadway and regional theaters, adapted into a film, and chockablock with memorable numbers and well crafted scenes.  “If I Loved You,” “June Is Bustin’ Out All Over,” and the big hit from the show, “You’ll Never Walk Alone” have been covered by thousands of artists and are in repertoires all over the world.

I can understand the fondness for the songs, and the admiration for the quality of the writing, but Carousel itself as a story?

This is one of the vilest pieces of crap penned.

Based on the play Liliom by the Hungarian playwright and poet Ferenc Molnár, Carousel is the story of Billy Bigelow, a self-destructive idiot who diminishes the lives of those around him simply by existing.

Molnár’s original play doesn’t dodge that bullet, and it ends with the protagonist being led off to eternal punishment while his dim-witted widow waxes nostalgic over him, despite the fact he abused her, never supported her, and left her in the lurch to bear and raise their daughter after he was killed in botched robbery.

Given a chance to redeem himself by performing one good deed for his daughter, Liliom (Hungarian for “lily” but also slang for a street thug) botches even that simple task and so gets dragged off to the fate he well deserves, the fate he quite deliberately and exquisitely fashioned for himself over the course of the play.

Small wonder those who adapted it to stage and screen typically sought a means of mitigating Liliom’s fate, to give one last ray of hope instead of following the story through to its grim but wholly logical conclusion.

Of all the adaptations that tinkered with Liliom, Carousel is by far the most egregious. It explicitly endorses spouse and child abuse as acts of endearment, Billy Bigelow (the Americanized Liliom) being a prideful, arrogantly ignorant sociopath who cares only for himself, and despite the vain promise of “You’ll never walk alone,” his daughter and wife are compelled to suffer all their lives for his sins and shortcomings.

He brings his daughter a star from heaven which even in the context of the story doesn’t mean anything; it’s just a gaudy trinket that can be and ultimately is ignored.

Geeze, a Marvel movie would at least see the kid get some superpowers out of the deal…

And if such a thing is possible, the 1956 film adaptation is even worse than the stage play:   It begins with Billy in heaven, gainfully employed polishing stars, no need to either account or atone for his earthly behavior.  His return to Earth is just to help his daughter out, not redeem his terrible behavior with a single good act, and in that context he’s more trouble than he’s worth.

One’s tempted to call Billy Bigelow a worthless sac of human excrement, but that’s not accurate: Excrement has use as a fertilizer.

Billy Bigelow is a 55-gallon drum of toxic waste, poisoning all it comes in contact with.

The key plot elements of the stage play are this:   Billy Bigelow, carousel barker, gets fired by his jealous boss, Mrs. Mullin, when she sees him flirting with young mill worker Julie Jordan.  Julie loses her job as well because of her infatuation with Billy, and the two marry impetuously.  

A month later and he’s still found no work due to his refusal to return as Mrs. Mullin’s barker or take any other job that requires him to answer to a boss.  He’s drunk and abusive, and while the stage play raises the issue that Julie should leave, it just as quickly subsumes it with Julie’s "he's your feller and you love him" attitude.

When a disreputable pal, Jigger, suggests they rob Julie’s old boss, Billy first refuses (though he doesn’t warn anyone of Jigger’s criminal intent), but when he learns Julie’s pregnant, launches into the most odious song in the show:  “Soliloquy”

“Soliloquy” is a schmaltz fest that most people choose to hear as a loving father doting over his unborn child.

It’s not.

It’s a sociopath’s love song to himself.

Billy Bigelow does not care what is truly best for his son, he only cares about vicariously enjoying success through the boy, and not through the boy’s own efforts and desires but by shaping him into a mirror image of his father, a toy for him to manipulate and play with.

Almost all the careers he imagines for the boy are the kind of low level manual labor jobs that he’s only fit for, the exceptions being carnival barker and President of the United States (which he disdains).

“Bill, my boy Bill I will see that he is named after me, I will. My boy, Bill! He'll be tall And tough as a tree, will Bill! Like a tree he'll grow With his head held high And his feet planted firm on the ground And you won't see nobody dare to try To boss or toss him around! No pot-bellied, baggy-eyed bully Will boss him around.”

He even fantasizes about teaching his unborn son how to seduce girls…then realizes to his horror that his “son” maybe be a daughter.

“My little girl Pink and white As peaches and cream is she My little girl Is half again as bright As girls are meant to be! Dozens of boys pursue her Many a likely lad does what he can to woo her From her faithful dad She has a few Pink and white young fellers of two or three But my little girl Gets hungry every night and she comes home to me!”

That’s pretty damn sick.

Bigelow, perfectly willing to raise a proto-rapist male, doesn’t want the shame of having a victim for a daughter, and thinking the only way he can protect her is by buying her a higher station in life, decides to help Jigger rob Julie’s ex-boss.

Even there he’s a punk, not willing to do anything directly to threaten the old man, but perfectly willing to share in the proceeds of Jigger’s crime.  (He’s also an idiot insofar has he had a nasty confrontation with the intended victim about a month earlier and apparently presumes the old man won’t remember him.)

But he’s not done destroying himself and Julie’s future and the future of their unborn child yet: While waiting in ambush, he and Jigger gamble, betting their anticipated shares of the loot.

Billy loses all his shares!

There is no point to him participating in the robbery.

There is no reason to help Jigger any further except arrogant pride.

They attempt to rob the old man, the old man draws a gun, Jigger flees, and Billy, rather than face the consequences, takes the coward’s way out and kills himself.

His daughter grows up being scorned and taunted by other children for having a father who was a stupid brute and a thief and a suicide, and as cruel as that is, who’s fault is it but Billy’s?

It was his choices that put her in that predicament, his pride, his arrogance, his lack of character and courage and imagination.

And Carousel celebrates this; it doesn’t pity Billy but rather feels sorry for him.

This is the difference:  Pity can recognize the suffering of another person yet still recognize that person’s responsibility in bringing tragedy upon themselves; feeling sorry for someone negates the harm they have inflicted on others.

Billy deserves nothing. Julie deserves nothing -- she enabled this tragedy.

Only the daughter deserves sympathy and a second chance, Carousel’s climax is arbitrarily tacked on to give a fake happy ending and is as phony as a three dollar bill printed on a Xerox machine running low on toner.

Liliom and Carousel are tragedies, but only Liliom has the courage and clear vision to recognize it.

Compare and contrast with Guys And Dolls, the 1950 Damon Runyon musical by Frank Loesser, Jo Swerling, and Abe Burrows.

Like Carousel, it’s a crowd pleaser:   Plenty of great scenes, lots of great numbers like “A Bushel And A Peck”, “Adelaide’s Lament”, “Luck Be A Lady”, “Sue Me”, “Sit Down (You’re Rocking The Boat)”, and “Guys And Dolls” itself.

It’s got a better structure than Carousel:   A common convention in Broadway musicals is to have a main couple that the show focuses on and a supporting couple to offer a counterpoint to the main action.

One could eliminate the supporting couple in Carousel and, while the show would be diminished, it would not change the story of Billy and Julie.

But Guys And Dolls thoroughly integrates the stories of Sky Masterson and Sergeant Sarah Brown with that of Nathan Detroit and Adelaide:  Remove either couple and the entire show collapses.

And of special interest is this:   While Sky and Nathan are gamblers and by association at least peripheral members of the underworld, they are also men of personal integrity (Nathan less so than Sky, granted, but it’s still there).

Nathan is trying to stage “the oldest established permanent floating crap game in New York” in the face of intense police scrutiny not for his personal benefit alone, but so he provide for his crew and so he can finally marry Adelaide, the show girl he’s been engaged to for 14 years.

Sky is riding on top of the world, a superstar among gamblers, a man who doesn’t need anything…

…yet at the same time is acutely aware of a large vacuum in his heart.

The story’s hilarious, with all sorts of outrageous characters and plot twists, but it rings far truer than Carousel because for all their flaws, the characters are trying to better themselves not for their own good but so they can better the lives of others.

This is a crucial difference between them and Billy Bigelow.  The characters of Guys And Dolls may be foolish on occasion, but they ain’t dumb, they know the score, and more importantly, they know themselves.

The show’s songs are rich with self-awareness, and while the characters take risks -- they’re gamblers, after all -- they aren’t stupid self-destructive risks that will harm others.

Sky and Nathan, in fact, demonstrate a willingness to sacrifice themselves for others, and accept the consequences for their own actions.

More importantly, they are willing to change in order to better help the women they love, and that change comes without regret but rather with (again!) the self-awareness that their happiness is intrinsically wrapped up in the happiness of the person they love.

No song better sums it up than “Guys And Dolls” itself:

“When you see a guy reach for stars in the sky You can bet that he's doing it for some doll. When you spot a John waiting out in the rain Chances are he's insane as only a John can be for a Jane. When you meet a gent paying all kinds of rent For a flat that could flatten the Taj Mahal. Call it sad, call it funny. But it's better than even money That the guy's only doing it for some doll.”

The song closes with as direct a repudiation of Billy Bigelow as we could hope for:

“When a lazy slob takes a goody steady job, And he smells from Vitalis and Barbasol. Call it dumb, call it clever Ah, but you can get odds forever That the guy's only doing it for some doll!”

 © Buzz Dixon

[susanwardmegsunsetbeachfans]

Clive Robertson (Ben/Derek)

Soap Opera Digest Behind The Scenes

Behind every great scene is a backstage story!

Last Updated: July 2nd, 1998

Double Trouble

Soap Opera Digest, June 16, 1998

SUNSET BEACH's Clive Robertson Duels with a Dual Role

Daytime has a long history of asking it's strongest actors to tackle two or more roles. Currently, AMC's David Canary (Adam/Stuart), GL's Kim Zimmer (Reva/Clone Reva), and SUNSET BEACH's Clive Robertson (Ben/Derek) are pulling double duty. Here's a candid interview with Robertson, explaining allthe reasons why playing a twin is not necessarily a walk on the beach.

DIGEST: What has your schedule been like? ROBERTSON: I feel completely brainwashed. It's been difficult, because they've been scheduling me last everyday. I've had so many scenes that I come in at 1, often don't get on [set] till 5 and go until we finish. We shoot late, and it's difficult to concentrate at that time. If we finish at 10 or 11 [pm], then I have to go home to learn all my lines and I don't get to bed until 2am. I've been getting up at 10 and trying to remember the lines I learned the night before. It's been a vicious circle and I haven't really had a life.

DIGEST: Do you think the story is working? ROBERTSON: It gets better from what I've read. The way they've been writing Ben since he's been locked up has been annoying me. I'm really bored with him. Ben has never allowed anyone to get the better of him, and he's not been allowed to express himself in the way that he would. They've been writing all these great, great lines for Derek, but nothing for Ben. I'm looking forward to getting Ben back to himself.

DIGEST: Which would be what? ROBERTSON: The interesting thing about Ben is that I never set out with the intention of making him likable. He's fairly abrupt, fairly anit-social, but with different people, other sides of his character are brought out. That's what the audience brought into him. He's a bit of an anithero.

DIGEST: Do you enjoy playing Derek? ROBERTSON: Yes, I've had a lot of fun playing him. I find Derek a lot easier to play. Ben's quite difficult to portray, actually. Ben has this sort of economy with movement in the way he walks, talks, and does things, whether it's picking up a phone or whatever. Derek, I find much more liberating. I've purposely not given him that same ease with things.

DIGEST: What else do you do to differentiate Derek from Ben? ROBERTSON: When I first played Derek, his voice was much posher. He was more sophisticated, brought about by the fact that he was trying to copy Ben, but not doing a very good job. Lately, Derek's become more comfortable with being Ben, so the differences are fewer.

DIGEST: Have you had any problems with how easy it's been for Derek to take over Ben's life? ROBERTSON: Some situations are a but difficult to believe. They haven't made it very clear that Derek's soundproofed the room and put speakers in. That's how he's able to hear what's happening. And the password - the fact that Derek has all Ben's ID's, but can't access his password. I would have thought he could go to the bank with his passbook and credit cards and checkbook and get the money. I assume it's in a Swiss account and you need ID's for stuff like that. And Derek used to always have the same clothes as Ben. My idea was that he's been plotting this for a long time. He's been keeping such close tabs on Ben, he's probably broke into the house and bought the same clothes he saw in Ben's wardrobe, actually monitoring him so closely that he was able to wear [the same outfit] on any given day. But they sort of brushed over all that.

DIGEST: Anything else? ROBERTSON: Meg is in the warehouse with Derek, so you would expect Ben to shout at her. But Derek has said he'll kill her if anything happens, so I guess that's fair enough; he's not going to endanger her. But then Casey shows up. Derek does have a knife in his hand, so I suppose Ben is thinking that Derek will kill Casey and then, kill Meg. But personally? I would have screamed.

DIGEST: What are you thoughts about continuing to play a dual role? ROBERTSON: It's fun to play two completely different characters, and there are some interesting things coming up between the brothers that I am excited about doing.

DIGEST: Do you think the fans are buying the story? ROBERTSON: They can buy anything now that Ben isn't the killer.

Full Scream Ahead

Soap Opera Digest, January 1998

Hoping to capitalize on the success of the movie Scream 2, which opened to huge audiences in December, SUNSET BEACH launched it's own horror-filled muder myster on "Terror Island".

The story began in late December, when Ben gave Meg a house on a secluded island for Christmas. "He suggested she hold a New Year's Eve Party for all her friends," explains Ben's portrayer, Clive Robertson. "Minutes before everyone boarded the boat to go to 'Terror Island,' Ben back out for business reasons. Or so it appeared.".

Those who made the fateful (or is that fatal?) journey were Meg, Mark, Casey, Michael, Vanessa, Virginia, Sean, Elizabeth, Jade, Gabi, and Grogan (the boat's captain) and two of them are already dead. Tim and Amy pop up on the island eventually - as does Ben - and murder and mayhem ensue.

The SUNSET BEACH set designers were given the incredible task of designing the house and the island in the studio in just a few weeks. The crew, led by production designer George Becket, created enough gruesome interiors and spooky exteriors to rival those used in the typical horror flick.

"It was rustic and creepy, but cool at the same time," describes Dominique Jennings (Virginia). "There were a lot of gargoyle things outside and the forest area was very creepy."

"It's sort of THE ADDAMS FAMILY revisited," adds Director Peter Brinckerhoff. "There's a large living room and the furniture is old and very gothic. There are a lot of old weapons that look like they are from the Middle Ages - broad swords and axes of different types - ultimately used by the principals for their protection."

The gang turned to the rusty tools for self-defense after both Elizabeth and Jade were bludgeoned to death. "One of the things we try not to do in daytime is show too much blood," Brinckerhoff says. "But it was hard to justify not doing it here. So, we see the end result of the mayhem but we don't see the mayhem itself."

To add to the fear factor, the writers included scenes where the trapped participants dined on drug-laced soup, which caused terrifying hallucinations. Academy-Award winning makeup artist Matthew Mungle (Edward Scissorhands) was hired to bring the special effect transformations to life.

"I look in the mirror and my face morphs off," recounts a squirming Sherri Saum, in character as Vanessa. "They made a plastic cast of my face and Matthew worked on me for about two-and-a-half hours. People were shocked. I had to look at it and I was horrified. It's very frightening."

Other hallucinations included Mark seeing the silverware turn into writhing snakes and Tim envisioning Meg with blood running down her face.

"Using special effects - snakes, faces morphing, blood, dark lighting conditions, a lot of candles, smoke - adds to the complexity of the experience," Brinckerhoff explains. "I was incredibly impressed with the dedication of the actors, who worked 14-16 hours a day for two weeks."

"The days were horror in themselves but we all wanted the end product to be really good. So we put in those 16-hour days and grinned and bore it," smiles Saum. Adds Jennings: "The days were long, but Terror Island was an emotional rollercoaster and so much fun."

Last week, mark was attacked and he pulled off the killer's mask during the struggle - to reveal Ben's face. "It's pretty brutal, what I do to Mark," Robertson says of the stabbing. It looks really nasty. They had (a body double) in to do all the other attacks. I was just there for this gruesome attack on Mark."

Is the killer really Ben? Will he be found out? Tune in this week as the mystery of Terror Island continues

[seeroftodayandtomorrow]

The Prince and the Moon God

Chapter 10

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Then again...why can't he? Just toss the amulet into the sea so no one will ever find it again, and not die? After a while, they'd stop looking for him, and he could just be whatever it is that Kurt wants him to be, and stay here forever.

Leave Cooper to fend for himself. Leave him to his death by an angry crowd, or to be sacrificed on the Moon Isle even without the amulet, in the hopes that maybe the sacrifice would be enough to keep the spell alive. Or leave Cooper to watch them take his daughter away, little Maya, who called him Uncle Blaine and liked when he read to her, and had wanted him to teach her play the harpsichord.

This is why he can't stay. It's a good thing, he tells himself, to remember that he has a reason for doing this.

He just wishes he could have had a few more moments to forget, to imagine what it would be like to stay here, be Kurt's...whatever it is he would be, to live without fear, without this duty.

He only crawls out of his hiding place at dusk, trying to avoid everyone and anyone on the ship. He feels guilty, knows he's the one to blame for the misery all of them are feeling.

As he enters the state room, though, Kurt is still there, staring out of the tiny window and looking like he'd rather be anywhere but here.

“Oh, sorry,” Blaine says when he sees him, and turns to go, but Kurt stops him.

“No, please stay. I wanted to talk to you. Please.”

Blaine hesitates, then nods and sits down at the table where they used to have breakfast together.

He doesn't quite know what there is to talk about; he doesn't think talking could make the situation any better. Then again, it could hardly make it worse.

Kurt looks at him with something like a smile.

“It's very hard to keep secrets on a ship. So I know you talked to Santana. And I....I think I need to apologize.”

“You need to apologize?”

Kurt nods. Hesitantly, he put a hand on the table, palm up. Blaine quickly puts his hand into Kurt's. It is not wise, maybe, but he feels that with Kurt's hand in his, he might be able to bear the abyss. He feels stronger with Kurt's hand in his, and almost happy.

Squeezing his hand and with a genuine smile for the first time in days, Kurt continues. “Whatever I might feel...or hope for doesn't mean an obligation for you. You're not required to...do anything just because I might wish it.”

He laughs a little. “Even though I demanded obedience when we first met, it was only regarding matters of the ship. I wouldn't order you to...spend your life with me or anything.”

Spend your life with me. Pain floods Blaine as he considers what he is offered, and what he has to refuse.

“Is...is that what I would be doing?” he asks, his voice breaking.

Kurt doesn't answer, and Blaine understands. Kurt has his secrets, just the same as Blaine, and however much they might guess of the others', they won't tell.

“If it helps,” he says, “Were I free to do as I wanted, I would do...that. Spend my life with you, or whatever you asked of me.”

Kurt just looks at him for a moment. Then he shakes his head. “I don't know if that helps or actually makes it worse.”

He shrugs. “Whatever...may happen, I want to try and at least...be friends for the time we've left together. I don't want to be angry all the time. It's not good for the ship, or the crew.”

“Or you,” Blaine says.

Again, Kurt looks at him. “Right.”

“I want to be friends, too,” Blaine says. “I've missed you. And I...I know I'll always be sad because of what...can't be, but...”

He's never been so open with Kurt before, they've never really talked about what might happen between them except the day after Blaine ran away from Kurt's bed. It hurts terribly to say those words, and he doesn't know if he can do it. Be friends with Kurt, knowing what they could be instead, what both of them want them to be....

But it must be even worse for Kurt, and if he is willing to try, then Blaine can do no less.

They don't go back to their easy talking from before, and Blaine knows there will be no shared breakfasts in the future, nor a shared bed. But when Kurt finally leaves with a “Good night” and a smile, Blaine's heart is lighter. It is only when he is lying in bed already and tries not to smell Kurt's scent in the pillow, that he notices the amulet around his neck has stopped buzzing so angrily. Instead, it is sitting there, glowing quietly and humming in a way that almost seems...content.

Blaine doesn't know what that means. He has always assumed that the amulet is reacting to the growing proximity to the moon island, but now....it seems attuned to Kurt, to Blaine's relationship with Kurt, or the atmosphere on the ship.

Or a thousand other possibilities that just don't come to mind right now.

Anyway, he can't let his actions be decided by an amulet, however magical it might be, however ancient and mysterious.

Instead he just tries to go to sleep as content as the amulet seems to be.

He dreams again. This time, he can see the Moon Isle, not only the lake. He walks its shores, he climbs stony hills and slips on wet moss, and eventually, he's standing on top of a ridge and looks down into the dark, fathomless waters of the lake. He slips again, threatens to fall, feels his body fight, fight—in a remote corner he knows that really he's thrashing on his bed, but in the dream, he gains his equilibrium back at the last moment. As he's stepping back, breathing hard, he wonders why falling fills him with panic when now, he must climb down, then cut his wrists and walk into the lake to drown.

He climbs. And it feels like the hills themselves are trying to hold him back. They are more treacherous on this side, he can't find holds for his feet or his hands. He has to walk what seems like miles around a deep ravine with edges so sharp they cut his feet. He leaves bloody footprints as he walks, every step an agony, and in the dream, he seems to know it's the island that's doing this, and he is angry at it for making it so hard to do something he doesn't want to do in the first place.

When he finally makes it down, he looks up just to see Kurt standing on the ridge, high above him, looking down at him with eyes in which somehow he can still see the sadness and the fear.

He is happy when he wakes up before he actually has to make the decision to walk away from Kurt—but he knows he'll have to make it soon, for real.

Life on the ship improves after their talk, and Blaine reluctantly comes to the conclusion that what Brittany said must be true. Kurt is...not happier, not happy at all, but calmer, more cheerful. So is work on the ship. Nobody sings while working, but they do talk again, and while the orders are still short and sharp, it's more because that's the way orders are.

He and Kurt don't really talk, but they've stopped evading each other, and when they pass, they smile.

The ship has stopped rocking more than an ordinary ship. It's also stopped going so fast at night, but it doesn't go slowly, either. It goes evenly, constantly, towards a destination it has no desire to reach but has no way around. Maybe that's the word to describe everything: inevitability. Resignation, acceptance, depending on the time of day and the captain's mood that is, after all, not only influenced by Blaine.

For Blaine, it's resignation, most of the time. He has stopped fighting, stopped doing much at all. Tries to stop caring as well. It's hard when all he wants to do is make Kurt smile every day, when he wants to talk to him, wants their breakfasts back, wants Kurt's bed with both of them in it...wants Kurt.

When he wants Kurt.

He tries not to, but can't help imagine their lives if he could just stay. Both of them, on this ship, for the rest of their days. Surely at some point, Santana would talk to him again. He'd find his place,  become better friends with Brittany and the rest of the crew. He'd learn everything there is to learn aboard the ship. He'd climb the rigging without fear, he'd live without fear. He'd travel, see the whole world. And he'd be with Kurt. Kiss him, bed him, be with him every day.

It sounds endlessly exciting, and also soothing in its monotony.

It makes him so sad he can't stand it, and he is glad the ship doesn't react to him like it does to Kurt.

Kurt...now they've gone back to a tentative friendship, Kurt seems okay. There's an underlying sadness in everything, and Blaine is sorry for everyone on the ship for having to live with that. But it seems bearable. And Blaine thinks Kurt must have a greater fortitude than he does, for being able to stand it.

Sometimes he thinks, if life has to be like this, death will come as a relief.

Then, one day, their sentry calls out: “Land, ho!”

Blaine stands on deck, hands clasping the railing, and watches the Isle of the Moon draw nearer and nearer. It does look like in his dream, and yet it doesn't. There will be no moss to slip on, he knows, and he knows his tale of rare herbs growing on the island would have been ludicrous for everyone who knows the Isle.

Black, barren rocks, with nothing growing, not a tree, nothing. The lake is hidden from sight by the sharp, ragged hills surrounding it. The island is of a strange, unsettling beauty.

It is late afternoon by the time they are close enough. There is no port, natural or man-made, and there are rocks in the water with edges so sharp they could cut any ship to pieces if the current pushed it against them with enough force. They need to take him there in a little boat. Blaine waits for them to launch one, but nothing happens. Everyone stands around doing nothing except for Santana on the wheel, who navigates carefully and makes sure they stay out of the current.

After a little while, Blaine goes to Kurt, who is standing at the railing, watching the island with a stony gaze.

“Permission to disembark, captain?” Blaine asks, and Kurt turns to face him.

“Denied,” he says with the same stony gaze. “I should have done this a long time ago. You are not to leave until you have explained yourself.” He raises his voice. “Mr Anderson is not allowed to leave this vessel. If he tries, you are to detain him and put him in my cabin.” Then he starts to walk away.

Somehow, Blaine is not even surprised. He makes a decision in less than a second. He touches the amulet around his neck to make sure it's still there, and then he grabs Kurt's arm to stop him from leaving. As Kurt turns, he ignores his surprised look and presses their lips together. It's at once forceful and tender, and he tries to put everything he feels into he kiss, his love, his regret, most of all the regret.

Then he ends the kiss, smiles, and runs.

And when he reaches the railing, he jumps.