#like and even thats not counting the fact that I pretty much have to restrain my self from putting every anime shinichiro watanabe even

[thottybrucewayne]

I know I keep harping on it but, it really does suck that shounen/seinen anime/manga enjoyers refuse to look at literally anything else because now I'm forced to hear shit like "If jjk not in your top five anime of all time, you buggin." and "Dbz is one of, if not the best anime of all time." said by grown-ass adults out loud on purpose all the time.

[nevertheless-moving]

Unnamed Extremely Bad Plan to Defeat Darth Sideous AU - SW AU NO 9

Hopefully writing down this star wars au will help me exorcise the cringe demon that helped midwife it. Time travel au where obi-wan and Anakin come up with an extremely SPECIFIC and UNCOMFORTABLE plan to defeat Palpatine because it unfortunately, would actually work, as it capitalizes on one of Palpatine’s easiest to reach political vulnerabilities. This is not a unique plan- there are other au’s like this, but this one is mine. When searching for ways to explain exactly why this anti-sith strategy inspires such cringe and delight in myself I realized, with sinking dread, I have seen this in an Always Sunny episode...which yeah. I might be over reacting but hey, cringe is a personal phenomenon, everyone’s different.

Anyway! Uh here’s a bunch of plot that will eventually culminate in the plan. 

*Too much plot, aaaah*. **All plot actually.** ***Its 1 am and this is still a draft*** ****It’s 2am**** *****This post will be just be background I guess.*****

*******STAR WARS AU NO 9 LAZILY OUTLINED CHAPTER ONE*********

Force ghosts Darth Vader and Ben Kenobi have had time to yell at one another without need for breath, and have more-or-less come to terms with the trainwreck that was their shared life. I wouldn’t call them well adjusted, but they’re more stable then they were the last decade or so of their living existence. 

In haunting Luke, they end up encountering an artifact in an ancient Willis temple that offers spirits the chance to fix the mistakes they made in life. It doesn’t truly unwrite what’s been done, but it lets you create an alternate timeline. So this galaxy will still be what it is, but some alternate galaxy somewhere could at least have it better. Its almost never been used, because becoming one with the force usually lets you accept the past, but viewed objectively, Vader and Ben’s lives involved an extreme amount of yikes. They say goodbye to Luke and are flung backwards and sideways.

Anakin is holding his mother as she dies. Obi-Wan is landing on Genosis. 

Vader just barely manages to avoid slaughtering the tuskens. To be honest, he doesn’t really get why he shouldn’t- his moral compass is still pretty f-ed up. He’s fairly certain the force is just torturing him, but still he controls himself (for Padme for Luke for Leia).

I’m gonna say well-adjusted!Vader sees murder in general as more of a vice than a sin- on par with having a beer. And really well adjusted Vader is willing to admit to himself that he’s an alcoholic, he seriously cannot regulate, its a problem. He really can’t let himself go, because he’ll just end up spiraling. And so he restrains himself and only seriously maims a few of the adult raiders.

Vader figures he can always come back later and slowly torture them to death if this whole ‘save the future’ thing doesn’t pan out.

Obi-wan leaves his shuttle and hides under a rock for 30 minutes. He calculates thats just enough time for him to pretend he went on an extremely effective and sneaky fact finding mission- just in case anyone checks R4′s records. Gets back in shuttle and gets the fuck out of there, much to Dooku’s chagrin, who lost sight of him after the shuttle landed and is now going to have to switch to one of his alternate start-the-war plans. 

On the flight back he reports everything to the council- fallen Dooku and the separatist leaders, the trade federation and the massive droid army, Jango Fett the clone template of the republic army (?) working for the separatists. He briefly comms Anakin, but anyone hacking into their conversations would hear only a nonsensical, rambling conversation. Later, a hacker might turn over the idea that they were speaking in elaborate code, but why would Jedi invent such a thing during peacetime?

The war still starts; at this point in the timeline it was inevitable; the artifact was only designed to give them the chance to correct their own failings, not the galaxy’s. Palpatine still gets his emergency powers. 

The same day the armies are discovered, separatist war ships take off to engulf Ryloth. The Jedi are instructed by the senate to lead the clone army and provide immediate relief-this will not be a repeat of the republic’s inaction on Naboo. It’s both better and worse than the first Battle of Genosis. So many more civilians are caught in the crossfire. The first titanic battle is not contained to evacuated droid factories, but rages across an entire populated world. The battle lasts for weeks.

The main reason this fight is less deadly is solely due to the fact that General Kenobi manages to maneuver his way into high command of the entire army.

 “I believe assumptions were made since I was the first point of contact with Kamino, Masters,” the Knight explained apologetically to the arriving high council members. “I realize its not quite appropriate, but for right now I am the Jedi most familiar with our forces and the enemies. I would, of course, prefer to cede the role to someone else.” 

The assembled Jedi can feel the truth in that statement.

“For better or for worse, advance troops were directed by the senate to land planetside and have met heavy resistance. I managed to redirect them to a more defensible position, where they can provide surface based cover fire for incoming reinforcements. The battle has already begun.” He received a grim nod of approval from Master Windu.

“I feel the need to say now, that if there’s one thing I learned from my time as a general on Melida/Dann, or in working against Death Watch on Mandalore, its that having a clear chain of command is vital for a military to succeed. I don’t need to remind some of you that leadership breakdowns were what ultimately ended both the Stark Hyperspace War and the Yinchorri Crisis,” Masters Koon and Tiin exchanged looks before deliberately sending forth a small force wave of approval, understanding where this briefing was leading. 

“I believe that unnecessarily restructuring command before the battle is won here could do far more harm than good.” The reminder of Obi-wan’s unusually militaristic apprenticeship put some of the assembled knights at ease even as it inspired a twinge of guilt in the older masters. 

“In command you are, General Kenobi,” Master Yoda finally acknowledged. “A Jedi Master you will be, once done this battle is. Have us do, what would you?” 

The battle lasts for weeks, and when its over, the commanding Jedi and Troopers involved will openly acknowledge that had anyone else been in command, it would’ve lasted months, if not years. Facing down logistical, strategic, and tactical problems on a scale unheard of for a thousand years, High General Kenobi does not falter.

Enemy reinforcements seem unending. For all their preparation, every single trooper is new to war, and secretly concerned that should they fall, they will be replaced with cadets who hadn’t even finished their training.

Obi-Wan is putting out fires before they can start. Much to their shock, clone commanders are informed that they will, for the time being, remain in charge of their troops. With a handful of exceptions, Jedi ‘Generals’ were in fact, to be treated as a cross between highly skilled commandoes and advisors with abnormally sourced field intelligence. 

“All of you have spent your lives training to lead your brothers into combat. The Jedi Masters and knights who are being assigned to your divisions have not received such training.” 

General Kenobi addressed the division commanders, some in person, some over holocomm. All focused in rapt attention as their General reordered the shape of their lives using language they could understand.

“The command structure I am issuing is designed to maximize our ability to utilize our respective strategic capabilities, while minimizing potential loss of your life. It will be our great privilege to serve alongside such an army, and while I fully expect a complementary exchange of knowledge in time, for now, focus on survival.”

The Jedi received similar briefings, tailored for their broader array of combat and military experience. Some, including Jedi Master Pong Krell and Grandmaster Yoda, were pulled aside and tasked with the essential mission of infiltrating and destroying the Droid factories on Genosis. If they were to have a chance of winning this war, they they would need to cut off the seemingly unceasing flow of droid reinforcements. 

An elite squadron of Arctroopers and Jedi field operatives were covertly dispatched, Grandmaster Yoda himself in command. Considering Count Dooku had yet to appear anywhere near Ryloth...the grandmaster had the best chance of bringing in the fallen separatist leader alive for questioning.

Shortly after they left, Anakin arrived, having finally turned over Padme’s protection to her regular guard. With the military creation vote past, the assassination risk was considered minimal. The real delay in his arrival came from her repeated attempts to join the Grand Army of the Republic on Ryloth with the intent of coordinating humanitarian assistance. Eventually he managed to convince her that she could do more good in the senate. 

After all, he pointed out, someone would need to followup the military creation act with a bill to grant clones equal citizen rights. Otherwise, the legal grey area that cloning fell under and their non-republic origin would inadvertently make the clones slaves. 

His borrowed Nabooan cruiser entered the warzone with the grace and efficiency as a small neutron bomb.

Those close enough to see its flaming descent watched in horror, realizing that the high generals own padawan would likely be a war casualty before he ever engaged in combat.

The legion nearest to soon-to-be-ground-zero, under the command of Captain Rex of the 501st, were distracted by heated combat, as the temporary barricade they had put up to defend the civilian population gave way to droidika artillery. 

While reloading, several dozen troopers happened to look up to see a speck detach itself from the hull as at spiraled in the lower atmosphere. Hope spread that the Jedi had managed to activate some sort of eject hatch. A skilled shocktrooper could probably control and and survive such a fall with luck, which mean a Jedi almost certainly could. 

A few tactical scouts charged with watching the skies confirmed that the speck was indeed a humanoid. No chute was visible, but even 8 days into the war, rumors had already spread about how Master Windu had passed off his chute mid-air to a troopers who had been damaged by suppressing fire, cushioning his free fall solely with the tank he crushed upon landing. 

Only one trooper, stationed in the town clock tower specifically to track the Padawan’s arrival and issued with a high-resolution farscope, saw the whole thing. Fortunately for his credibility later, in its current setting, the scope automatically logged photos every 5 seconds, ensuring that for years to come Obi-Wan would have a flipbook as evidence that he was not the crazy one.

CT-3609 or Blink (as he was named after winning the division wide staring contest on Kamino two year prior) forwarded the trajectory of the vehicle to command, who confirmed his analysis that it would impact two clicks out from their makeshift fort and not present a risk to civilian or trooper lives. 

As it traversed the stratosphere a figure (desperate repair droid, Blink assumed) emerged from the cockpit to perch on the nose of the ship. As it entered the troposphere, it became painfully obvious that the figure jutting out from the hull of the ship was in fact not a humanoid droid, but an unarmored human. The Jedi stood on the prow of the ship, seemingly impervious to and oblivious of:

air resistance 

centrifugal force

normal space gravity 

Blink’s slack-jawed bewilderment

the flames engulfing the ship below him

At this range, the smirk on the man’s face was visible (man? boy? kriff is he even through puberty?). Several miles above the surface he leaped, diving towards the ground like a bird of prey. 

To the west, the ship made impact with the ground, sending a shockwave that shook the tower just enough for Blink to lose visual in the final moments of descent. Cursing, as while he was confident the Jedi would inexplicably survive, he really wanted to see how. The trooper scanned the droid-engulfed farmland to the north for a crash site, to no avail. Lingering smoke from the burnt countryside negatively impacted visibility low to the ground.

Rather than trying to articulate his report into words, he sent the 50-odd frames the farscope had saved, as well as the coordinates for the jedi’s projected radius of touchdown. A quick radio over to long range electro-ballistics ensured that his landing wouldn’t be marred by friendly fire.

He awaited follow-up questions on the absurd entry method, which, when they came, mostly consisted of variations on “...Is this for real?” and eventually “Can you set the scope to video for a little while?” and finally “Do you think that’s how he got the name Skywalker?”

There was a temporarily lull in fire from the west, likely a ripple effect from the ship’s explosion. From his vantage point Blink could see his batchmates using the opportunity to try and plug the holes in their barricade with broken droid pieces. Regardless of the itch to join them, he knew he couldn’t leave his post until the Jedi actually arrived in camp. Finally, a distant explosion and thick pillar of smoke gave the Jedi’s position away.

He tried to make out details, but the scope had a difficult time focusing through the haze. Manually trying to fine tune the scope’s settings, Blink caught a glimpse of what looked like half a hover tank sailing through the air to impact with a trade federation troop carrier in a fiery explosion. Several more explosions, flying droid artillery, and plumes of smoke were caught on record before visual contact with the source was established. He was mostly visible as a blue blur, lightsaber mowing a meandering path towards their location. 

It wasn’t until Skywalker braced himself in place to punch a droidaka into pieces that Blink caught actual sight of the man. Only his eyes were visible, nose and mouth covered by layers of cloth. He blurred, then reappeared on top a massive missile launcher attached to an absurdly heavily armored vehicle. A minute or so of rapid blue flashes passed, the longest he had seen concentrated in one area. Then Skywalker was gone, movement clearly visible as he for once he moved in a straight line, plowing a rapid path away from the launcher. 

Less than 30 seconds later, Blink had to wince away from the scope, as a burning white explosion temporarily overwhelmed the direct light filter. The trooper panicked for a moment, thinking he had gone both deaf and blind, but the abrupt, sucking silence ended after a moment with a deafening sonic boom. The shockwave rattled the farscope, nearly knocking it over, but Blink managed to steady it and himself in time. 

A cheer emerged from pleasantly surprised vod below. The entire droid legion that had been guarding the missile launcher and apparent ordinance bay was flattened. 

It took a moment for the realization to set in that the background noise of missile and and anti-missile collisions directly overhead had slowed pace. With the northern flank gone, artillery were able to redouble efforts to the east, and a second white hot shockwave ensued, signaling that the tide of battle had shifted. It was almost too easy for the republics electro-ballistics to tactically devastate the surrounding forces. 

Eventually some sort of win/loss programming must have set in and all forces outside of a certain radius began retreating southward, conceding the scorched land to the republic army. It was cadets work to clean up the final suicidal droid charge. 

A commotion ensued as Skywalker leapt the barricade with a mid-air flip. The vod greeted him with cheers, as they correctly assumed his appearance had something to do with the skirmish’s decisive victory.

Blink sent the video of the battle to command and quickly packed up his scope and assorted equipment. Hurrying down the battered tower, Blink thought to himself that this Anakin Skywalker was the best sort of Jedi a trooper could ask for.

uh sorry i got really sidetracked there moving on

Kenobi and Skywalker quickly become the face of the war once again

they grit their teeth a bit, but when they finally have a moment to really plan they eventually agree that to take down Sideous they have to cut off his political power in addition to everything else, and taking advantage of their public personas was the most accessible way to do so (*evil laughter*)

While Dooku wasn’t captured, Yoda heard the truth in his old student’s cryptic warnings about a Sith in the Senate, and the council begins carefully editing their release of tactical plans to the Chancellor’s office in the hopes of ferreting out the spy in their midst.

Pong Krell looses two arms in his duel with Dooku. Obi-Wan successfully hides his smug pleasure at the news. Anakin enjoys makeing comparisons between him and Grievous. 

Kenobi doesn’t allow the origin of the clones to go unexamined, although he agrees that if the public were informed that they don’t actually know who ordered them it would probably cause panic.

The ‘inhibitor chips’ are ‘discovered’ early on and Anakin leads the effort to ensure that they are phased out and removed immediately. This consists of reminding every Jedi who even hesitates about how how he as a child slave had some experience with control chips and unless you want to take a leaf out of the hutts books lets start doing brain surgery chop chop mmmkay?

(This isn’t to say that Vader doesn’t still a twinge of shame at acknowledging his slave roots. But it is eclipsed by the burning guilt that he knowingly acted as slave master to his troops for decades after Sideous wiped their minds. He tried to rationalize it to himself, after all he didn’t immediately understand what Order 66 had done to the troopers. But while the morality of murder was more of an intellectual concern than a personal one, treating people as things...)

The Kamonions are a little harder to budge, referencing contracts that they refuse to allow the Jedi to see

Finally Vader snuck into the Chief Medical Scientist’s home while she was sleeping and straight-up threatened to murder her and burn down her lab. At the risk of losing her life’s work, Nala Se complied.

Vader left with the final threat that in the event that Darth Tyranus caught wind and activated Order 66 prematurely, he would kill 100 Kamonians for every Jedi felled by troopers. Shaak Ti was pleased by the cloners sudden change of heart. Tyrannus, and by extension, Sideous, are in the dark. 

Obi-Wan frequently publicly confronts Palpatine about the troops citizen status, urging him make use of his emergency powers to grant them citizenship and full pay, with the option to leave the army should they so wish. 

Anakin manages to play off his avoidance of the Chancellor as disappointment in his perceived lack of dedication to anti-slavery efforts

Finally Palpatine gives in- regardless of what happens next, the troops will be looked after.

With 2/3rds of the troopers dechipped, Vaderkin is eager to kill Sideous again, but after several intense screaming matches and sparring sessions, the time travelers come to the agreement that even if they succeed in their duel, with things as they were, the perception of the Jedi military coop would cause mass civil unrest. The scattered sith apprentices, while individually weak, were more than capable of magnifying that fear and anger until the galaxy breaks. Darth Sideous wanted to ensure that if he couldn’t have the galaxy, no one would. 

(Vader knows this. Sideous enjoyed monologuing, and much of his plotting couldn’t be safely bragged about until after he had decisively won, leaving Vader as the unwilling receptacle for years of pent-up rants and self-satisfied gloats about the inevitability of his victory)

Continued Here

[topsytervy]

New Years with Rafe

Just a little post about Rafe and you on New Years that I whipped up cause my lonely ass will be sat on the couch with a pizza next to my dog as I rewatch JackSepticEyes Little Nightmares playthrough instead of cuddled on the couch with a gentlemen non-canon Rafe.

Warnings: mentions of drinking, swearing, poorly edited so probably spelling errors, if you haven't watched All Dogs Go To Heaven small spoiler for it but not big enough to spoil the entire movie I think, and I think thats it.

Word Count: 1,089

Blurb: you spend New Years Eve with Rafe instead of going out and partying cause you two want to keep people safe. No shade. Just facts.

~~~~~

You and Rafe Cameron had been best friends for as long as you could remember. You were only a year younger than him and just graduated high school, heading off to college a couple months later before COVID and Rafe ended up moving with you.

"I don't know, Y/N. You living in an apartment alone or in a dorm with a stranger just doesn't sit right with me." He told you honestly as you packed your things.

"What? You wanna move with me and away from all your loyal subjects?" You joked, adding a little bow to it. 

"Yeah. Why not? Besides New Years will be boring if you're not here to almost flash everyone at a party and I stop you just in time." He grinned.

You smacked him. "It was once and it was windy, Cameron." He laughed, grabbing a pillow to act as a shield. "But if you're so worried about me, I wouldn't mind a familiar face around 24/7 even if it's an annoying one." 

Rafe stood up and clapped his hands. "Then it's settled."

However, New Years parties were on hold (well, supposed to be on hold but you know how some people are) due to COVID. 

"You were right about New Years being boring." You mustered through a yawn as you sat on the couch, curled up under a blanket as you and Rafe watched TV. A wine cooler sat between you two and you reached for the bottle, refilling your glass before refilling Rafes. "I think I'm going to turn in early. 2020 doesn't deserve a nice send off. It deserves a fuck you, get out, and never come back or I'll get a restraining order against you." You went to stand up but Rafe grabbed your hand.

Rafe checked the watch on his wrist. "Five more minutes. Just five. You made it this far, Y/N/N. What's five more?"

You blinked at him and he stuck out his bottom lip, pouting at you.

You rested your head on his shoulder and sighed. "Fine. But if I fall asleep, you have to carry me to bed." 

"Fine by me. Wouldn't be the first or the last time I do."

It was so much easier to stay awake when you were away from your bed and surrounded by strangers and loud music.  You and Rafe decided on a childhood movie marathon to help keep you two awake but it wasn't really helping. Rafe wanted to watch All Dogs Go To Heaven despite it always making you cry. And crying would only fuel the sleepiness.

"I really don't wanna go into the New Year crying." You mumbled as he put the disc in. 

"I have so much confidence that this is the time that you won't let tears fall." Rafe reassured you.

"Yeah. Wait until we get towards the end then my heart will crack and the tears will fall."

Now here you were watching Anne-Marie hearing everything Charlie was saying that would lead to her running out and getting kidnapped. 

"The tears are coming." You whispered, feeling your throat tighten as you held back sobs.

Rafe wrapped and arm around you. "She just got taken and they're about to tell everyone. This isn't even the saddest bit."

"It's just the sense of all the dogs, even Itchie who was pretty cold to Anne-Marie, are all spreading the word and willing to do anything to protect this little girl that half of them didn't even meet." The tears began to fall as you spoke.

"Okay, okay. I see your point. Maybe this was a bad movie to watch." Rafe rubbed your arm. 

"It hurts so much worse when you lose a pet cause it's like 'wow, my pet was exactly like that with me. Willing to do anything to protect me', ya know. It just fucking hurts man." You blubbered.

"Want me to turn it off?"

"No."

"Alright. I'll pause it when we hit 15 seconds to midnight. Sound good?"

You nodded, sniffling as you tried to calm yourself down. Rafe reached for the box of tissues on the end table and grabbed some for you.

"Thank you, bub."

"You're welcome, Y/N/N."

The time came a couple of minutes later to pause the movie and begin the countdown, you had composed yourself for the countdown and Rafe nodded.

"10...9...8…"

You brought the blanket closer around yourself as you two counted down.

"3...2...1… Happy New Year!" You two cheered. Rafe reached onto the floor and grabbed the bottle of champagne he had purchased, opening it and pouring some for you both.

You two linked your arms and brought the glasses to your mouth, chugging the beverage before unlinking your arms from each other. 

"To getting through 2020 together." You grinned.

"And to going into 2021 together but in a different way." Rafe added before grabbing your face and bringing his lips to yours.

You paused for a second before wrapping your arms around his neck and kissing back, pulling him impossibly closer.

Rafe pulled away first, grabbing the champagne and refilling your glasses. You kept an arm around his neck, a hand playing with his hair as you held your glass in the other.

"How'd you know, Cameron? I thought I was pretty good at keeping my crush on you secret." You asked, taking a sip from your glass.

"Oh yeah. If I wouldn't have found your journal and read it while I was waiting for you to get home one day after you graduated, I wouldn't have known at all about your little crush. You really don't flirt much, huh?"

You smacked him, mouth agape. "You read my journal?"

"Okay, underneath random books on your desk is a shit hiding place for a journal. Hide it in your underwear drawer or something. Literally anywhere else is a better hiding place than where you had it." He laughed.

You rolled your eyes. "Just unpause the movie so we can finish it and go to sleep, Rafe."

"As long as I get to sleep with you in your room tonight."

"Your room is warmer. I wanna sleep in there."

"Then we'll sleep in my room." Rafe grinned as he kissed the top of your head and resuming the movie.

"Now I have an excuse to crawl into your bed at 2 AM when I can't sleep and want your body heat."

"You never needed an excuse to come cuddle with me, sunshine. You just didn’t know it." 

~~~~~~~

[diamondnokouzai]

talking abt the visual novel characters under the cut <3

mayhart player character. red-haired human commoner, youngest child of her family, last child born of her mother before mother died and father remarried. shorter than average (5′2″ as female, 5′5″ as male) named mayhart because she was born on the fourth of may. wild & uncontrollable, bearing a rage that she herself doesn’t even understand. grew up a commoner alongside her childhood friend yerick. widely rumored in town to be a changeling- she doesn’t act the way a normal human should, never knowing when to leave well enough alone or how to calm down and settle for her lot in life (the number of times when she, accompanied with yerick, has been chased back to town by some beast she provoked in the woods is uncountable). was recently conscripted into the army and adopted by the duchess koballe after her latent magic appeared. one of very few people who can use offensive magic and not purely reconnaissance/traveling magic. finally has an outlet for her rage, and somewhat hates the things she does. wears standard military uniform but badly- doesnt entirely understand how all the straps & bindings work and will not learn :) as the player character, she can be male or female. as a male, his rage turns inward, and as a result he is less open with his own emotions and keeps all his feelings hidden within himself. openly contemptuous of the war, but far more polite than his female counterpart. neither version holds any respect for anyone who hurts the weak. neither can hold their liquor either. 21 in human years

demavieve eldest princess of the draconic realm- as such, the future sovereign. the draconic realm is the only country allied with perine in this war which makes several people very nervous (its like if the us allied with luxembourg in a war against belgium france germany & the uk excep the us was the only country with nukes). demavieve has a very strong sense of honor though so constrains herself to a human form along with swordplay. this is less dangerous than it seems because if demavieves human form dies then she just turns back into her draconic form. her human form also has red hair, but its far more tameable than mayhart’s. she wears it tied back in a ponytail in general. she wears a perine knight’s uniform with vestments from the draconic realm to signify that she is (a) a foreign-lent soldier and (b) a commander. her human form is muscular and about 6′6″. hot and well aware of it.arrogant but also very friendly about it- ‘you love me? haha, of course you are! you seem great too!’. kind of sees this whole thing as a game- dragons live a lot longer than humans, and something like this is just a blip on her radar. very low empathy until someone she cares about is hurt at which point everything goes out the window (and she cares about pretty much all the perine soldiers- not in a very respectful way, but she loves them all and she goes apeshit sometimes). very friendly with serenina. can absolutely hold her liquor. only romanceable as f!mayhart. 23 in human years, ~150 in real time.

serenina the only princess of the former emperor and empress. i spoke about her in more detail in another post so this is gonna mostly be glossed over. wears her hair in afropuffs cause she does her own hair and shes proud of it. temporal (reconnaissance) magic. desperate to please. legally only friends with demavieve, although also friendly with yerick. about 5′0″ although she desperately wants to grow taller (unlikely). her eyes look like theyre black but if you look closely (which she probably wont let you do) theyre actually purple/indigo. is completely out of touch with the rest of the world because shes a princess but she is also very sincere and tries her best to be helpful when she can. very expressionless and sensible. not very well-liked as the former princess of the warmongering emperor and empress. actually very touch starved. does not wear standard military uniform outside of mage’s robes, which she wears over tea dresses (which is another reason some soldiers dislike her) is kept away from alcohol as much as grayson can and as such will get drunk off half a cup of wine. sleepy drunk. 18 in human years.

grayson the bastard son of the former emperor, sereninas older half-brother. grew up as a commoner in the same area as serenina & yerick until he was brought into the royal castle at age 9. fiercely protective of serenina. faux affable- you know the ‘expressionless smile’ princes from otome games/manga always have? thats graysons face pretty much always. legally not eligible to the crown (due to some religious issues with committing patricide & stepmatricide) but like. like hes already doing everything? yk how it is. highest commander of his troops attempting to broker peace with the other countries perine was at war with (most noticeably alloue, nawolem, & farik in order to attack caledonia, which was the puppeteer behind the former reign) but is not above underhanded methods/tactics including attacking noncombatant targets (they dont even have geneva). very intelligent & very calculating- consistently calculates highest reward/lowest risk maneuvers and has them executed flawlessly. his own cunning scares him on occasion, but he mostly locks that away- theres no time for those kinds of feelings in war. a foil to f!mayhart- she is wild, he is restrained; she shows her true feelings regardless, he always acts at a happy neutral; mayhart confronts her uncomfortable feelings, grayson hides them from everyone. about 5′11″, has long dreads that he keeps tied back. dressed in perfect military regalia, including commander’s cape & military crown (basically just a circlet). also cant hold his liquor- hes nearly as bad as serenina. 25 in human years.

izyn the son of count dau claire, the only noble house in perine that has been loyal to grayson since before the deaths of the former emperor and empress. very quiet because he has social anxiety. completely brainless. very friendly but his height (6′4″) and imposing aura (he gets nervous) means that the only people who can easily communicate with him are yerick and grayson. black hair, cropped short, and green eyes. skilled swordsman, mid-commander. will get trapped in an unwinnable situation which yerick needs to save him from. wears his military uniform right but...........not really? he wears the base uniform right but always forgets his commander’s cape. has a dedicated fanbase that came about when he did his training shirtless. literally doesnt think that any of his problems are that deep (honestly doesnt think anything is that deep). suffice to say, theres a reason why count dau claire never shows up and doesnt seem to be involved in any of the decision making of the count’s matters. very protective of yerick (younger brother). is the most visibly affected by the war- as the one who is usually in the center of the violence and doesnt have a survival cheat like demavieve, he has pretty bad ptsd which coupled with his anxiety issues make him a hot mess. his hobbies include hiding in dark rooms that have been reinforced to the point where literally only yerick can get in. despite his size he gets drunk very easily- not as bad as grayson & serenina, but 1-2 mugs of beer puts him out. 26 in human years. only romanceable as m!mayhart

yerick adopted son of count dau clarie. childhood friend of mayhart. born an orphan, an old woman took care of him til he was 4 and she died. stuck around mayharts town cause their family would give him food whenever he stopped by. still ended up fairly malnourished. small but vicious- hes screamed at mayhart lots of times for the stupid shit they would get him into and is not afraid to smack some sense into them. however he is not a good fighter because hes physically very weak- most of his energy in developing went to his magical capabilities, which came to fruition when he was 6. about a year after that (with a great deal more shunning from the townsfolk besides mayhart), he was adopted by count dau claire. was sealed with a subordination seal (used in order to ensure compliance with reasonable requests as long as a reasonable argument is made) for a year to ensure that he wouldnt run away. izyn liked him right away, but it took about 18 months for yerick to not be completely vicious whenever he was approached. as of the modern day of the vn, yerick is as protective over izyn as izyn is him- yerick has seen some of the worst of the world, and in his opinion izyn has not (this is despite the fact that izyn helped overthrow the royal family at age 15 but in fairness to him izyn told yerick none of this) so he wants to make sure his big brother stays happy. yerick holds absolutely no loyalty towards count dau claire or even to grayson- he is loyal to his own needs first, with a decent second being izyn and an even further distant third being mayhart & their family. very prickly & well acquainted with the fact that most people are inherently selfish and would turn away from an orphan on the streets. abandonment issues. his spatial magic is mostly used on rescue ops (mostly mostly getting izyn out of situations where hes surrounded by enemy soldiers but this extends to other perine soldiers). wears his uniform properly, including mage’s robes & commander’s cape over the standard perine uniform. hates to ever appear weak ever, so when he has to go to the medical tent izyn has to either force him there or pretend to be tsundere and throw bandages at him. izyn desperately wants to dote on him but that is one of yericks Hard Boundaries. theres like ONE time when yerick falls asleep because of arcane overexertion and izyn piggybacks him back to camp and yerick acts like its the most shameful secret in the world. foil to m!mayhart- very open with his anger & feelings and shows when he is angry and accepts that part of himself, open with his loyalties and doesnt give a fuck about it, doesnt like the war but does respect it. despite his size, it takes easily 3 barrels of alcohol to even get him tipsy, izyns lack of alcohol tolerance pisses him off cause he has to walk him back to his tent. 5′4″ and wants to grow taller but has accepted his fate. 19 in human years.

eliya legally not a combatant. former princess of caledonia, was discovered at 12 to hold the power of the divine will and so was sent away from her mother and father (who she perceived as loving) to be raised within the church as a holy sacrifice (those who hold the power of the divine will release a huge psychic shockwave when theyre killed, so she was basically raised to be a holy tyke bomb). has a lot of religious obsession, prays 3x a day and has been brainwashed into believing in the power of holy judgement- essentially, her church handler (aka the deacon of the church where she was raised) has raised her to believe that if she commits a sin she’ll be killed so she has a LOT of anxiety over doing the right thing.at the same time shes been brainwashed into believing that doing anything in the service of the throne of caledonia is morally & theologically correct. shes also had occasional contact with her parents (like a yearly dinner or smth) and so still has a lot of loyalty to them due to how they manipulated her and her relationship with her little siblings (7 yrs younger x 2, 2 yrs younger, 13 yrs younger). completely devoted to her church, would gladly martyr herself for them (however this wouldnt trigger the shockwave needed by the army). is loyal to her parents, the deacon, and then the church. is captured by the perine army after a raid on a noncombatant area and spends a lot of time figuring herself out. foil to serenina (esp in terms of loyalty & parents/siblings, emotions (eliya has a lot of them and shows them, serenina is the opposite), their royal treatment, their relationship with trust (serenina doesnt, eliya does and worringly easily). long golden hair, light blue eyes. wears neither a military uniform nor a priests’ uniform, instead wears a one-piece white ‘dress’ (really more a tunic/oversized shirt) & is barefoot. desperate for attention, praise, love, etc. widely disliked due to her POW status but she really thinks shes making all these friends. has quite literally not been able to make her own choices since she was 12 years old. above average alcohol tolerance but nowhere near yerick. 19 in human years.

[madmen]

all of them pls jodie comer janelle monae phoebe waller bridge, have fun

do you have a crush on anyone? yeee on my grilled friend! bitches be havin girled friends.

what’s your favorite candy? i am cadbury dairy milk bar’s bitch! i also really like kitkats especially the mini ones those are so good.

favorite love song? aaaaa it changes with the weather i like so many but can’t take my eyes off of you is always a classic both it and let’s get married (mitski cover) make me feel Warm and the past few months i cannot stop listening to mr mika tiny love. yes this question asked for one but this is me restraining myself i promise. OH it might be being alive from company actually.

what was your first kiss like? technically my first kiss lasted for .0001 of a second in a public high school hallway and it was by accident so i choose to disregard that one because the one after that was very nice imagine. you are on a BEACH it is MIDNIGHT she tastes like some type of wine and you are not sober and do not know what you’re doing so you’re taking MENTAL NOTES and trying to imitate what it feels like she’s doing but you want to live in this moment forever.

what was your last kiss like? it was sweet! well, more like salty because we were crying but it’s because we are simply full of love!

sexual/romantic orientation? i’m a (fleabag godmother voice) LESBIAN

do you prefer poems or love letters? love letters hands DOWN

favorite fanfic trope? i like it when they’re both friends and in love and afraid to say anything for fear of ruining their relationship. there is a name for this but i hate it so i will not say it it’s two words, first one with an m and second one with a p. Don’t know what it is about that second word but. hate it.

have you ever been in love? yes, highly recommend

favorite milkshake flavor? I don’t like milkshakes I think they’re ice cream soup which is disgusting but my favorite ice cream flavor is mint chocolate chip if that counts

dinner dates or brunch dates? I prefer the idea of brunch dates but I wake up hungry so in practice probably dinner dates but like. to diners so I can have breakfast food.

favorite flowers? Pink carnations! Honorable mentions to bleeding hearts and roses that are light orange or light blue or light pink.  

favorite perfume/cologne? no clue

favorite candle scent? if it’s sold during fall i probably love it anything pumpkin-y or slightly-but-not-too-much cinnamon-y

what’s your ideal first date? we go on a funky lil adventure! we see some fancy house and get food together and then see something else maybe a beeg church i like the way they make me feel small and they make me feel Whole when i’m there with someone i care about. maybe go for a walk in my head this is some city we’ve never been to and we just walk and talk and hold hands and point out pretty architecture.

favorite love story? in real life i am still losing it every time i think about how ronan farrow proposed to jonathan lovett via his BOOK. in fiction i am unfortunately stuck at 11 still losing it over both the doctor and rose as well as mary and matthew crawley.

what’s the most attractive thing a person could wear? idk i think suits are hot but i also melt when my girlfriend wears her oversized hoodie she just looks so cute and cozy! i feel like most things are attractive when you’re into a person. also lingerie.

chocolate, vanilla, or red velvet? vanilla!

snow, rain, or sun? rain but not too hard just a nice light mist

sweetest romantic memory? she wrote me LOVE LETTERS!!!!

favorite dating sim (and favorite character)? I have played all of one dating sim, which makes it my favorite by default. Unfortunately, it is UmaPri/My Horse Prince. I did not finish it I got impatient and my apartment watched a playthrough on youtube you don’t even get to fuck horse boy I don’t think you even kiss but it’s still so funny horse boy is obviously the best character.

fictional crushes? leia organa, cheryl blossom or betty cooper (whichever one is more likely to commit a crime on that episode), joan holloway, betty draper, villanelle, all the big little lies milfs, among others.

what’s your dream wedding like? it takes place at the johns hopkins library if i can’t have that then like. some fancy house or library or museum somewhere thats super neat. i don’t know what i wear but i look very nice. all my friends are there and it’s Very Fancy. elegant and refined thats the general Vibe.

what makes you blush? i have no clue i think sometimes when i drink my face flushes so we’ll go with that

do you believe in love at first sight? only in romeo and juliet. i think theres like. a spark at first sight maybe but also not needed for love ya know?

do you believe in soulmates? i don’t know i feel like theres like. maybe a list of people who are your soulmate? like it couldve been this one yea but it also couldve been someone else had circumstances been different like the world is soooooooooooooo big and sometimes theres right place wrong timing i think? i don’t know. 

denim jackets, leather jackets, or bomber jackets? on me? all of the above. on hot gals? leather jackets.

what’s your sign? taurus sun, leo moon and rising

are you single? nope i have a grilled friend! i love her!

do you prefer to charm, or be charmed? both!

guitar or piano? normally i’d say piano but rianne used to play guitar so mixed thots here also it’s so fun to try and teach her piano and hear her lil laugh when i fix her fingers on the keys. answer foggy try again later

favorite romcom (or any romantic movie)? when harry met sally!!!!!! 

do you fall in love easily? i don’t think so but i’ve only done it once so i could be mistaken

valentine’s decorations: yay or nay? i think they’re cute!

would you prefer to propose or be proposed to? what’s your dream proposal? I wanna propose which throws a real Wrench in Rianne’s concurrent desire to propose. Gotta keep the proposal a surprise, soz gang.

cloud gazing or star gazing? Star gazing!

do you like to dance? I cannot dance to save my life but god if I don’t fantasize about it every second of the livelong day

what’s your OTP? please do not make me admit to being into harry potter on main, and worse yet being into dr*rry and w*lfstar it is rightfully embarrassing.

kittens or puppies? I am afraid of almost all living things which includes kittens and puppies but I prefer pictures of puppies

coffee, hot chocolate, or tea? Cofy!

favorite soda? i hate fizz > : ( why does everyone like it when it feels like theres ants crawling on your tongue?

do you prefer gazing wistfully out the window or lying dramatically over the sofa? is there someone to give me atten shun? if so, i’m lying dramatically on the sofa. if i’m on my own it’s window time babey

favorite ABBA song? this one also changes over the years right now i’m gonna say voulez-vous

fuck/marry/kill? (anons name 3 people of your choice) this is so MEAN okay so phoebe waller-bridge’s dad was named in the panama papers i know she has the most exorbitant amount of wealth and i trust her to treat me right. that leaves jodie and janelle cannot stress enough how much i haaaaate having to kill any of them okay at the oscars we saw what janelle’s tongue can do so unfortunately we will be sacrificing jodie comer : / jodie i’m sorry i love you.

favorite pajamas? I don’t own pajamas because I’m a weirdo who either sleeps in their clothes or an oversized long sleeve t shirt and leggings

favorite liquor? vodka for mixing, sourz for shots

do you think about love a lot? yeeeeeeeeeeee

a walk in the park or a walk on the beach? i don’t like sand. it’s rough and it’s coarse and it gets everywhere. Honestly I think I’d rather just walk indoors i am anti fresh air got that sweet sweet hay fever

hand kisses or nose kisses? nose kisses!

what’s your dreamhouse? i wanna live in the city in an apartment and due to the fact that i am american it is unfortunately so big in my head no apartment has ever been this beeg and if it did exist i could not afford it but. it’s so pretty i have fancy kitchen cabinets and my living room is filled with bookshelf upon bookshelf of used books and it has room for my piano and i have a beeeeeg sleigh bed and black cherry furniture and a dishwasher and a laundry room. i come home and am filled with calm.

[sassytrickster666]

NSFW Alphabet:Hans Landa

GIFS are NOT mine, credit goes to original owners/makers. If you see one of yours and would like it credited please Message me. Thanks! <3

Also the idea of an nsfw alphabet is not mine either but idk where it started so same goes for this. Dont like dont read! Not here for the drama!

A = Aftercare

Most of the time he has other business to attend to so there isn’t much time for aftercare.

If he doesn’t have to go, he’ll wipe most of the evidence away and kiss some of the harsher bruises he left. After this he’ll lay back down and tell you you’ve been a good girl. Sometimes, he’ll pull you closer so that your head rests on his shoulder and his arm is wrapped around you.

B= Body part

Generally speaking he has a thing for your face, especially your eyes. Of those he can read you ; emotions, thoughts. He likes to know everything.

Whether you’re annoyed, nervous or happy during the day and whether you’re pleasured during the night.

When it comes to his own body, he would have to say his mind. It’s what helped him accomplish all that he did will do in the future.

C= Cum

Hans loves cumming on you, as it shows you’re his and you submitting to him.

He likes cumming on your breasts and stomach most. Second to those are your mouth and pussy. It gives him the feeling of ownership.

D= Dirty Secret

His secret is that sometimes, he is in a bit of a different mood (this started happening after the war). This is when he wants to hand the control over to you, do your bidding and feel small. What he enjoys the most, then, is having you ride his face and control his breathing. He gets turned on when you call him things ranging from milder words as ‘bad’ and ‘naughty’ to ‘pathetic nazi pig’. He has no idea where this comes from and frankly, is embarrassed by it.

E = Experience

Considering his age he would have his fair share of experience. However, the last couple of years he’d been completely absorbed by work, referring to his rank and nickname, and thus he’s a little rusty. At first he had his doubts about approaching you because of this. Later he had zero problems making you come the hardest you did in ages.

F = Favourite Position

It’s usually described this way:

You’re bent over on your knees and he’s behind you like in doggy style. Only he’s pulling you up by your hair, neck or upper body so your back touches his chest.

G = Goofy

Believe me, he is as unpredictable in bed as he is during the day. One moment he can be kissing you while being 100% serious and the next giggling while trying to clip off your stockings. Never quite knowing what to expect certainly provides an extra thrill.

H = Hair

He doesn’t like feeling dirty and has the time and the means to keep it exactly the way he feels most comfortable : bald.

He prefers for his partner not to be completely hairless, it would make him feel like being with a non-adult.

I= Intimacy

For one, it always takes Hans a long time to trust someone regardless of the situation. So he’s usually on edge anyways. However, once you earned his trust he started treating you a little different than before. He was never particularly abusive or mean towards you but now he dared to be softer with you. For example, he would proudly take you to formal events, reach for your hand. At times, softly trust into you while kissing and caressing you. The point is: once he trusts you he’d dare show another side of himself, a sweeter side that would involve lingering kisses, more tender caresses and a protective arm around your waist when going out. As if anyone would dare harass Landa’s girl anyways. And once he really goes for something, nobody better get in his way. Because he isn’t afraid of letting others know you’re his and anyone who would like to dispute that will get cut.

J = Jack-off

Hans wouldn’t jack off often, but when he does he takes his time. Whenever he’d been extremely busy or someone has been getting on his nerves particularly much he does it to blow off some steam. Would not look good if a colonel would blow out the brains of a bratty luitenant, would it?

So when he comes home and you’re away, he runs a nice warm bath, carefully undresses, put his folded clothes away on a shelf and let himself sink into the warm water. Then he would sigh and savour the moment. He would close his eyes and imagine you with him in a different setting. Your eyes, your smile, your curves, the way you would kiss him and how he would hold your body against his. Slowly he would trail his hands from his chest to his thighs to tease himself. He would imagine it your soft touch, both nude on a warm summers  night. Your breasts bouncing slightly as you get on your knees. Looking up at him teasingly as you’d kiss his upper thighs.

Then he would stop teasing himself and start caressing his now rockhard cock, grunting softly. He would imagine the wonderful feeling of your mouth on him, how you would lick and suck him and try to swallow him whole as he’d speed up his hand. He’d imagine how your full lips would look outstretched on his cock, how you would moan softly as he’d tug on your hair, the vibrations almost immediately sending him over the edge.

Then Hans would use his free hand to tease his sack. At this point he would eagerly speed up his ministrations until he’d spill his seed, moaning your name and imagining seeing it disappear into your eager mouth.

K = Kink

Oh, my sweet summer child, if you haven’t figured that Hans is one kinky motherf***** yet, brace yourself. So here’s some of his kinks in a row:

-Bondage, using cuffs or ropes. Depending on his mood whether he’d be the one restrained. (Being restrained often goes with the degrading of D=Dirty Secret).

-Public sex. He loves teasing you in a public setting. it starts quite innocently with a hand on your knee or thigh, but you know that before dinner with his colleagues and their partners ends, you’ll have come at least twice. Either by him fingerfucking you under the table or him dragging you off to some broom closet or deserted office. He enjoys it most when you play with him, teasing him too. This is related to the fact that he loves the control and domination he usually has by simply walking into a room.

-Roleplay, he loves being versatile. His favourite scenarios include (cheesy, right?) nurse/patient, priest/churchgoer and teacher/student.

-Dear Hans is usually a Dom, which means that he totally gets off on you calling him ‘sir’, ‘mr. Landa, sir’ or by his official rank. He loves spanking your ass while you call him that, too.

L= Location

Though he thoroughly enjoys making you his in a public place, he definitely prefers the confines of his home. Here, you can both be as loud as you want and take your time.

M = Motivation

Pretty much anything can get him turned on and you like to tease him for it. The sheer knowledge of what kind of underwear you’re wearing, a look you give him or a simple touch. Whenever he draws a quick breath through his nose, and on occasions looks away you know exactly whats up.

N = No

Truly hurting you, mentally or physically. He simply cares too much about you to do that. They may call him a monster and he’s accepted he might be one and that’s a part of him. But even he could never hurt the woman his heart belongs to.

O = Oral

Honestly, he loves it, the anticipation, when you sink down on your knees before him. Knowing that soon you will take him in your mouth and working to take as much as possible. Actually, it’s the kitten licks you give his cock and balls before you do so that kill him. The view of you is simply too beautiful.

As to giving oral, Hans Landa does nothing half-assed. He loves propping your thighs on your shoulders and giving you love bites on them and your hips, marking you, showing who you belong to. He just gets enthusiastic about it. At times it seems he turns it into a game of how many times he can make you scream his name. One of his favourite moves is doing so slowly and suddenly sucking your clit hard into his mouth.

P = Pace

The pace would depend mostly on his mood as he doesn’t really have a preference. He does tremendously enjoy suddenly changing his pace. For example, when you are having a slow, intimate moment and, out of the blue, starting a brutal pace that makes your eyes roll back.

Q = Quickie

The reason that quickies rarely happen is that Hans is usually way too loud for him and that the last thing he would want is for the two of you to be caught. One, because it might compromise his authority and two; because your body is for his eyes only and he wouldn’t want to bring you into a position where you could be disrespected or embarrassed.

Though, the ones that do happen are legendary; the time in the office bent over his desk, the one in the broom closet at the busy restaurant.

R = Risk

Hans looooooves to experiment. It’s just so exciting to try out new stuff! He’s usually shameless with telling you what he’d like to try, though would never push you. In turn, he is quite open minded when you bring something up.

S = Stamina

Though he’s usually good for one round (occasionally a second), and he does like to make it count. He lasts up to a good twenty minutes, but it can vary a bit depending on how much you’ve teased him.

T = Toys

Apart from the stuff used to restrain someone, none, really. He doesn’t feel there’s any needed and neither do you.

U = Unfair

He loves teasing you, but is not patient enough himself to drag it out. He also likes being teased, to an extent.

V = Volume

One of the main reasons he prefers fucking at home. Thats where he doesn’t have to worry about anyone hearing too much. This man almost never shuts up and that’s evident during sex as well. And damn he’s loud . He moans, groans and is definitely a dirty talker. Speaks solely German when he does too.

His favourite sound of yours is either a whimper or the strangled sound you make when a moan gets caught in your throat.

W = Wild Card

He loves calling you nicknames and it’s kinda cute. Usually Schatz or meine Liebe. Next to that he really enjoys it when he comes home in the afternoon and you greet him with a kiss and some coffee after. It makes him feel fuzzy. Its strange.

It makes him think that maybe someday he could make you his forever. Get married or even have a family.

Beside that, he totally crumbles if he finds that you happen to be wearing a housemaids like outfit. Like i said, he’s a sucker for roleplay.

X = X-Ray

He’s quite long,of average thickness, veiny, and crooked very nicely so that when he thrusts into you it’s just too easy for him to hit your G-spot.

Y = Yearning

As there are so many things that can turn him on, his yearning is pretty high. If he gets the chance he’ll definitely make you his once or twice a day.

Z = Zzz

After sex, Hans is usually awake for longer than you, and usually just lays and enjoys the moment. However, when he does fall asleep he tends to end up laying on his side next to you, breathing in your scent and holding your waist.

[avengersnthings]

Do I Wanna Know? (Bucky Barnes x Reader)

Summary: Do I wanna know? / If this feeling flows both ways / Sad to see you go / Was sorta hoping that you'd stay / Baby we both know / That the nights were mainly made for saying / Things that you can't say tomorrow day / Crawlin' back to you

Word Count: 1,365

Warnings: Angst, some swearing

A/N: This is based off of the Arctic Monkeys’s song, “Do I Wanna Know.” If you want to be added to my Tag List, just let me know! Enjoy!

Tag List: @mp938368 @pcdmesamidala @thatgirlsar @jumperswellies @quicksoldier @kitkatgaming @marvelfandom-stuff @itsmaytimetosaygoodbye @agentraven007 @marvelgoateecollection @thaniya82 @thats-so-rhyan @hymnofthevalkyries

MASTERLIST

Bucky hated this, watching you laugh as you tried to hide the blush that encompassed your entire face while your hand rested on the chest of some man. A man that wasn’t Bucky. Running a hand down his face, Bucky sighed at the situation he was in. It wasn’t right of him to get jealous or angry at the man you were with, and Bucky knew that. He couldn’t help but feel those feelings though. No matter what way Bucky looked at it, he knew. He knew that he loved you, and he had no damn idea how it happened. 

Leaning back in his chair, Bucky took a swig of whatever drink was in his glass. It didn’t matter what it was because it had absolutely no effect on him. That’s one of the many things that Bucky hated about the serum: he can’t get drunk. Not even when he is trying to flush out the image of you leaning flirtatiously into another man while Bucky just sits back and watches.

Abruptly pushing his chair back, Bucky stood to leave. Just when he was about to turn his back on the vision of you and some other man, your sweet voice called out to him. Bucky wanted to leave, he really did. He wanted to try to get rid of whatever feelings he had towards you because he knew that there was no chance in Hell that you would even think about reciprocating those feelings he had for you. But just as if Bucky was a fish on a hook, you reeled him in so easily with your sweet voice. 

“Where are you going, Buck?” You had asked, and Bucky couldn’t help but smile at the sound of your voice. 

“I’m pretty tired so I was going to head to bed,” He said, lying through his teeth. There was no way that Bucky could even be remotely tired since it was so early in the night.

Face falling, dejected, you nodded. “Okay, get some rest then. Night, Buck.”

“Night,” Bucky replied, heading towards his room. It was stupid to go back to his room, really, since all Bucky did was stay awake thinking about you. Just accepting the fact that you were going to fill his head with false hopes in his dreams, Bucky crawled under his sheets. And he was right, because there you were in his dreams, inviting him in with your soft lips and sweet voice.

It was the fifth time Bucky dreamed about you that week.

Days have since passed from the party where Bucky saw you with that man. Thankfully, to Bucky’s relief, he never saw that man again. It seemed like things didn’t work out between the two of you. Nevertheless, you still filled Bucky’s dreams each and every night.

You filled Bucky’s thoughts during every waking moment, too. It seemed like you were everywhere, which was a blessing and a curse all wrapped up in that pretty little smile only Bucky received. It was a blessing in the sense that Bucky was always with you. During training, during time off, during meals... those were the times Bucky cherished the most. It was a curse though when Bucky realized that the two of you would only be friends, no matter what.

As Bucky sat on the couch next to you, his arm slung around your shoulders, Bucky got lost in his thoughts of you once again. Bucky had constantly tried to distance himself, but it failed each and every time. Bucky had tried to find someone new, someone who might return his feelings. But without a doubt, Bucky came crawling back to you, clinging onto the false hopes that you gave him in his dreams. It was like he was too busy being yours to find someone new.

But you weren’t his, Bucky reminded himself time and time again. Bucky gave his whole heart to you over and over again without even knowing if you returned his feelings. 

Do I wanna know? Bucky asked himself as he looked down at you. Do I even want to know if these feelings flow both ways?

Shaking his head, as if to rid himself of his thoughts, Bucky stared back towards the TV. No, he didn’t want to know. Because if he did know, and if your answer was no, Bucky didn’t want to deal with the heart break it would inevitably cause him.

So Bucky sat back as he watched men flirt with you as he silently held a torch for you that would never burn out.

Months have passed and the amount of times Bucky had to restrain himself was overwhelming. It was hard for Bucky not to hate the men that flirted and touched the love of his life. Hell, it was even hard for Bucky to restrain himself from beating the shit out of the man that sent you home crying one night. But it was absolutely overwhelming for Bucky to restrain himself from kissing you. Absolutely nothing compared to the ache that Bucky felt in his chest when he thought of kissing you but realized he couldn’t.

It was like fate was toying with him, it really was. It was some sick cat and mouse game that he was playing with fate. Fate was the mouse that constantly kept escaping his claws, even when he was so close. So close to finally knowing what it felt to have your lips against his.

No matter what situation Bucky found himself in, he was always on the cusp of trying to kiss you. You were always so close to him. It would have been so easy for Bucky to just lean over and place his lips on yours. But Bucky still didn’t know if you felt the same way that he did. The one thing he did know was that if you felt the same way, you could be together if you wanted to.

Do I still wanna know? Bucky asked himself again as he turned over the idea of asking if you felt the same way. One look at the smile you gave him and Bucky knew his answer. No, he still didn’t want to know because he couldn’t risk forever losing that smile you reserved only for him.

Screw heartbreak, Bucky thought loudly to himself as he practically sprinted down the hallway. I need to know.

Over the last two months, you had met someone. Someone that could actually mean something to you. Bucky didn’t think too much of it at first, seeing how those dirt-bags usually dumped you in a few weeks. That was something Bucky never understood, how those people just tossed you aside. If Bucky had you, you would be the most cherished and loved person in the whole world. What really sounded the alarms in Bucky’s head was when he saw you give the man the smile you reserved only for Bucky.

Turning the corner sharply, a sigh of relief escaped his lips when he saw you waiting on the couch, ready for your date. He had caught you, and just in time.

“(Y/N), I need to tell you something,” Bucky said, cutting through the silence and gaining your attention. Nodding your head and patting the seat beside you, Bucky made his way towards you. Taking your hands in his, Bucky stared into the eyes he loved so dearly. With one more nod of your head, to tell him you were listening, Bucky drew in a quick breath. 

“(Y/N), I love you. I’ve loved you for so long, and so deeply that I forgot how I was before I met you. Every aspect of my life is flooded with thoughts of you, and I can’t stop it. No matter how hard I try. I am too busy being yours to fall for somebody new. And no matter what, I always come crawling back to you. It makes me so sad to see you go off with other men. So, I need to know. Do you want me crawling back to you? Do you want me to be yours? Do you love me as I love you?”

All Bucky received was silence.