#like fucking go for it babe! save ur family!!

[critdeeznuts]

OBSESSED with how will plays his characters. their motivations. their personalities. their EMOTIONS. just. the way he runs threads that link each one UGHHGGJH. i love it. so much thought goes into them. i will fucking LOSE MY SHIT if he made normal a cleric so he could divine intervention lark’s ass.

[shakirawastaken]

dsmp if...they wanted to propose to you!

dsmp if... series goes wild  anyway

dream: - he’d put himself out there with a poise of confidence and strategy - like bro is prepared . he knows when where what why and how all this shit is happening  - but is also kinda like “ill just wing it and we’ll see how it goes lol” - get this man a schedule - he doesnt want to do a whole public thing so in my head i see him proposing to you in like a restaurant but like a fancy one - hed splurge for sURE  - one of those guys who had like 50 million meeting with ring companies to design the perfect one - asked his mom for help on designing a ring  - he had the blueprint for a speech in his head but when the moment came he went with the flow  - but when hes proposing hed remember his speech so hed be like - “i had this speech that id written, but looking at you made me forget it all, will you marry me?” or some shit like that LMFAOOO - pays sapnap money to come eat the place too so he can take pictures 

sapnap: - okay sapnap is a family man in my head - hed also want to do a destination proposal - maybe greece? rome? somewhere not in america is what im feeling - or hed do it in a fucking ranch in texas or like down the street from the dream team house either one - EITHER WAY he would want your parents and his parents MINIMUM to be there - searches up “best wedding ring designs 2022″ in google and hopes and prays - hed have one or two meeting to plan the ring but i think he’d be confident in what you like  - even if he has no clue - like “so sir, do you think your future fiance would like a rose gold band or gold band?” “rose gold for sure” *has no idea what you like * - would not try to plan a speech, he knows he’d forget it and wouldn’t even use it - saves all that material for the vows - so confident you’ll say yes that he starts calling ahead to look at venues to tour - LMFAO IMAGINE YOU ANSWER HIS PHONE AND THE GUY IS LIKE “hello yes we’re calling nick because he had interest in touring our wedding venue! congrats on the engagement!” - and youd be like “tf” - so you know - but dont tell him you know please it would make his year 

george: - is nervous - “dream what if they say no idk” “bro youre a fucking idiot” - def doesnt want to do a public proposal, he likes the private aspect - so he does it at home or some shit and his phone up to record cause bro knows youd be mad if you had no memento - but he doesnt do it secretly - hed press record and set it up so you can obviously see it - and youre expecting some prank - but then he gets down on one knee and youre tearing up and shi right in the middle of your kitchen - get mad at him for not letting you dress up and look nice for it - has a speech planned out in his head. word for word. and recites that shit back to you like its fucking drama class - once u say yes hes on discord like “SHE SAID YES” and sapnaps like “no fucking shit” - he’s the type of guy to make a ring that he likes and hopes that you like it too - luckily you do like the ring so it all works out - if not just tell him he wont be mad hell just go make a new one

quackity: - asks you like a few months earlier if you want to get married - “do you wanna get married” “sure” - so he knows youre locked in and ready to go LMFAOO even if you interpreted it as light hearted at the time - because of that theres a little suspicion that goes on in your mind when you see him go “i gotta take this call” or “no im def not looking up wedding venues 2023 what do you mean” - but you being the great s/o you are just ignore it - is he proposing or did he take you on a late night drive to an outlook thing - is he proposing or did you catch karl in the bushes with a camera - is he proposing or did he say youre beautiful - is he proposing or did he get down on one knee?? YK WHAT IM SAYING - bro just stares at you and you stare at him like - “babe” “babe” love - youre nodding ur head yes before bro gets a chance to speak - which is good cause he didn’t know what he wanted to say - not that he doesnt know what to say its just - he has so many words for you that he cant put them into words - was ready to blurt out a mixture of spanish and english and hope u caught his drift

karl: - enlists the help of his friend - “hey tina take y/n to get their nails done” - “hey brooke take y/n to get a new dress” - “hey sapnap give me money to buy y/n a ring” LMFAOFMOA - no hed be saving up that shit for AGES - started a proposal dream pinterest board the minute he knew you were the one - subtly ran ideas by you over the course of the years you were together - you didnt think of anything. blissfully unaware - “look at this picture on pinterest!” “oh its sO PRETTY!! imagine getting engaged there” - *saves it to the board* - BUT AS A RESULT he cant make up his mind on where to propose - so he just picks one enie-meanie-miney-mo or however you spell it  - wherever it ends up being its so sweet - mr beast or someone tricks you into coming to the location under the guise of a video  - and you show up and its karl in a suit - “lets go on a walk love” “okay?” - you get an idea of whats about to happen

wilbur: - stalks your pinterest stalks your moms pinterest stalks your ex friends sister met someone at the club and he kissed her’s pinterest - is SO CONFIDENT he’s got everything right because all his information is form you directly - plans that shit out to a T  - “okay phil at 11:02 am you call y/n and say good morning any plans for the day then tommy at 11:34 am call y/n and ask her if she wants to join you for a vlog at [location]” “dude wil we know lets just get on with it” - chooses somewhere with ambience with music perhaps by the ocean or a river or something - meticulously listens to all of spotify for the perfect song to play in the background - hired james and ash (professionals) to film  -  public proposal wants the world to know that he is wilbur and he loves you -  isnt nervous about proposing but is scared something is gonna go wrong -  the whole build up to the proposal is a blur to him  - he wants it to be perfect - hes mentally checking everything off in his head as it happens - “okay so we arrived on time, check” “we’re standing in the right direction check” - when the time comes to propose he blanks - cause everything went right and now its showtime - says whatever is on his mind and then gets on track - “oh my god everything i alright this is amazing! but i love you dear like a lot and...” - cue cheering from tommy (and a lot of soft smiles from random people) when you say yes 

please send me requests it took me days to figure out what to write about here

[humongousgothskeletonfarm]

tsc thoughts while reading (beware of spoilers) starting with -

david wymack my fucking beloved

also i never rlly liked/cared for thea but her scene with jean and her nickname for him was cute

chapter 3 thoughts:

jeremy being in awe of neil and the foxes is giving me life

fanfics with alvarez in them gonna go crazy now that we actually have a first name for her (and don’t have to invent one)

oh they rich rich (in reference to jeremy’s family butler?!)

jerejean first interaction!!!!

chapter 4:

omg sunshine court mentioned

having the sudden realisation that i can never read fanfics that have jean’s perspective or anything about the how the ravens work, raven!neil/aftermath of the kings men in the same way again

my neighbours are having a party and while i’m loving the music and absolutely jealous i’m not there, it’s really distracting me from reading

ngl i rlly miss neil and andrew and the foxes please let me see my family soon

‘ what you hold onto is less important than the act of holding on itself’ nora sakavic shut the fuck up you philosophical genius i’m gonna cry this is so real to me

renee i love u

WIT WTF JEAN IS NINETEEN I DIDNT KNOW THAT OH MY GOD BABY HE JOINED THE RAVEN LINEUP AT SIXTEEN WTF

i’m drinking red wine while reading and i think that’s appropriate… also i’m listening to that jean moreau playlist someone made and it’s mega depressing https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5zlPt63Ap0AjJQ1Ff5OKrd?si=75oEzLE8SO-bfJwewM8Evw&pi=a-ge04jIlVTJGY

this is so funny to only me but i’ve been hyperfixating on one direction again and zayn just dropped new music so everytime i read about jean’s raven roomate zane i think of one direction and confused myself a bit about what fandom i’m reading rn

fuck riko u sick fucking fuck u put jean into a box with a singular hole for air and left him to die u fucking cunt

KEVIN ASKING JEAN TO PROMISE NOT TO KILL HIMSELF AFTER NORA WROTE COUNTLESS DRAFTS IN WHICH JEAN KILLED HIMSELF WHILE ON THE PHONE TO KEVIN AND THE ONLY TIME SHE DIDNT KILL JEAN OFF IS THE VERSION SHE PUBLISHED AND THE REASON WE GET TO HEAR HIS STORY TODAY IM SO BROKEN

jean’s ‘gift’ from the ravens with his broken magnets, blacked out postcards and angry letters is making me cry he deserves so much better

slowly realising that this book is gonna be super triggering lol whoops

a cool evening breeze 🥲

THAT CREEPY LITTLE GOALKEEPER IS MY FAVOURITE GUY OK

‘kevin saw nothingn but the court, but jean had stopped hoping for more than that years ago’ shut the fuckkkk uppppp i cant do this anymore kevin/jean relationship is so deeply important to me (i say this about everything)

chapter 5:

SECOND NEIL/ JEAN INTERACTION OF THE BOOK IM SO FUCKING EXCITED

‘of course it’d be you, you tedious malcontent’ ‘good morning to you too’ is so ‘morning sunshine’ ‘fuck you’ coded (neil and matt bromance confirmed)

the amount of mitski on this jean playlist is making me sick

FUCKING SCREAMING OMFG THIS IS THE JEAN/NEIL CONTENT I YEARN FOR

‘abominable cockroach’ aww jean u say the sweetest things 🥰❤️ neil loves u too babe

literally devouring every last scrap of information jean feeds us about neil - his slow, hungry, hateful smile and the madness in his eyes (neil baby i love u never change)

oh jean don’t diss aaron, do u know how many fanfics have been written about u two

tsc is confirmation that jean moreau will come into ur house and judge u based on the contents of ur fridge (and then throw out ur stash of lollies)

‘to have a real match as a palate cleanser’ jean is really trying to win my favour by borrowing neil’s sassiness huh (no wonder i love them so much together) ((and yes i know he’s BEEN sassy ok))

jean reaching for the tv screen as if he could save neil and describing andrew running for neil as if hell was on his heels is making me absolutely giddy idk whether to scream or cry i’m doing both and i’m giggling

I bet on losing dogs is so jean moreau coded omg

holy fuck nora, the moments after the raven/fox match when riko tries to kill neil is fucking amazingly written. reading from jean’s perspective as he watches the game on tv, the tension, the breathless anxiety and confusion of the scene is palpable i coukd fucking taste it, my chest is tight just reading it

JEAN SAYING ANDREW WILL BE COURT IS IMMACULATE

[a-aexotic]

🌙 RAFE AND GETAWAY CAR IS AN ABSOLUTELY NEEEEED (love ur writing btw 🫶🏼)

pairing. rafe cameron x fem!reader requested? yes no

warnings. angst, kinda toxic relationship, usage of coke (its obx, what do u except?)

summary. rafe was the sweetest to you but one day, he changes. you can't look at him the same.

taglist. tbd

➜ missing out on updates? ❪ navigation. masterlist. taglist. ❫

part 2!!

Rafe had never been more drawn to a person than you. You were the only person to not see him as a narcissistic monster and he was high off of the feeling you gave him. People were convinced he was a monster - a sadist with no regard for people’s feelings or life. 

But that wasn’t the least bit true. He might seem like a big scary man but he just a little boy who misses his old parents on the inside. You were the only person in the world who could see that. You could look him in the eyes and see the most wholesome person in the world and Rafe knew that. 

At first, it was the best time of your lives. It was like the beginning of every horror movie; sunny days on the beach, drinks with his family every Sunday, perfect kisses and special gifts. It felt like a daydream, every day with Rafe felt the beginning of a perfect love story. The type of love that people sing and write about; hopelessly in love with one another that makes you feel like you couldn’t live with one another. 

That all changed one night. 

You’d never been scared of Rafe, not even in the slightest. You’ve always seen him through rose-colored lenses. Rafe was not the same person high, he always acted a little out of the ordinary when he was under the influence. He’d done so much stuff that night and you tried to stop him, but it did nothing but add fuel to the party. 

Rafe was snorting his third line this night and you were beginning to worry. He was not acting the Rafe you knew since you were kids. You sat on the couch, watching Rafe laying his head back on the couch, the white powder evident under his nose.

"Hey, Rafe?"

He hummed in response, sniffing. His eyes were closed and you were pretty sure he was falling asleep. Before you could finish one of his friends sat on the couch, catching Rafe's attention. He turned to him.

"Okay, let's do one more line." He started taking out the white powder before you spoke up.

"Rafe, haven't you had enough?"

He finally looked back you, his eyes red from everything he was smoking. "I think one more line is good. Unless you wanna try it?"

You shook your head. You didn't wanna try coke with Rafe right now (or ever). You've seen what that white substance could do, especially to Rafe.

"Oh, the Kook princess too good for coke now, huh?" One of Rafe's friends has voiced whilst the others laughed. Rafe's eyes were planted on you, not relenting.

"Come on, Y/N. Just one line, you don't even have to finish it." Rafe put his hand on yours and you felt him shaking and his usually warm hands were cold as ice.

"No, Rafe, I'm good."

"Come on babe, just one line."

"No."

He rolled his eyes, grabbing your head and bringing it down to the table. You immediately pushed him away and your heart was racing. "What the fuck Rafe, I said no."

"Well I-"

You scoffed and got up from the table, walking away. "I'm going home. I'm tired of this shit." You mumbled. The entire table was quiet as Rafe ran after you, his head dizzy.

That was the first night you saw the Rafe Cameron that everyone else sees. He wasn't trying to be violent, you know that. You were still scared shitless, he was acting so reckless. He usually treated you with the utmost care, touching you light as a feather and treating you gently. You didn't know Rafe when he was under the influence, you only knew Rafe when he was sober.

The coke addiction only grew and your patience thinned. It was hard trying to have a conversation with drunk or high Rafe. You tried saving him, you really did. And you knew he loved you, he always showed you it. But you didn't know if you still loved him.

You love sober Rafe and you were starting to see less of him. He loved you wholeheartedly and you knew that, you do too. But nights like those only repeated, him becoming gradually more aggressive. You hated it because you knew that wasn't Rafe.

As soon as you opened the email from your college, you knew. It was time. You didn't want to leave Rafe but you had no choice now. It was either let him ruin both your lives or just his. You were never a selfish person but you had to do this. For yourself.

Maybe in another lifetime, Rafe and you could live happily ever after. But not this one, right?

[taytrashmouth]

heyy i love ur writing🩷🩷 Could you possibly do prompt 18 where the person that’s been abused is the reader and steve finds out and comforts her when she’s anxious maybee xx

Awe!!!! Thank you so much ❤️

Okay I’m here for this, I hope you like it

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Prompt: person A finds out person B has been abused

TW: swearing! Abuse

Steve Harrington x reader

It was Christmas Eve and your family was having a big party (as usual) with the family they pretended to like (as usual) It was the first time Steve was really going to meet your parents, not just wave or awkwardly say hi as he dropped you off. You had made sure he hadn’t met them….

You were overwhelmed and you knew all these people, but Steve seemed fine.

“Steve?” You asked as you pulled him to the slightly quieter kitchen.

He hummed in response, putting his hands on your waist and you leaned against the counter tops.

“You okay?”

“Honestly? No.” He half smiled. “I’m pretty sure your cousins hate me, your brother looks like he wants to kill me and your dad didn’t even glance at me when I said hello.”

You sighed. “If it helps you’re good at hiding it.”

He sighed too.

“My cousins are…young. They don’t know what’s what. My brother is just upset he has to be at a family gathering and my dad….well he hates you.”

“ I feel so much better babe, thank you.” He rolled his eyes sarcastically as your cousins manically stampeded through the kitchen knocking the punch bowl all over Steve’s back.

You both looked at each other in shock, as the kids ran away. It felt like time had stopped, , the music slowed and everyone stopped and gawked.

“Fuck.” You whispered under your breath.

Steve looked like he was on the verge of a panic attack. He was so stressed about what to wear to meet your parents and now it was ruined.

“Steve, you can put your sweater in the washer, I’ll find something in my brothers room for you, meet me upstairs.” You instructed and rushed to find something to clean up the mess.

“Baby it’s okay, let me help you clean up.” Steve offered.

You shook your head, tears filling your eyes. Steve’s brows softened in confusion and worry. It was t that big of a deal? Was it?

“Y/n! Why aren’t you cleaning this up?” Your dad yelled.

“Sorry.” Your voice was so quite not even Steve could hear it.

You knelt to the floor and started to wipe up the red liquid. Steve tried to help but your father shoved him out the way.

“That’s a woman’s job son, don’t be a sissy!” He spat.

Steve tried to hide the look of disgust in his face.

“George-“ your mother tried to interrupt.

“Shut up!” He screamed.

As you tried to get up and fetch the mop he grabbed the cloth from your hands. You stood still, tears on your cheeks.

Steve was frozen in place as your mother ushered everyone outside. She left years ago, but she left you behind, you never really forgave her for that.

“You are so fucking clumsy! You know that!” Your father yelled.

“It wasn’t her f-“ Steve tried to interrupt but your father shoved him out the way.

“You think your safe because of your smart mouth boyfriend? You’re not! You’re still a fucking pathetic little girl!” He yelled as he rung out the red liquid in the cloth onto your white sweater you’d be saving up for the whole month. You gasped, you could smell liquor on his breath.

“Hey man, Stop!” Steve spoke.

That was when your father slapped you cold across the cheek.

“What the fuck?!” Steve shoved your father into the island and grabbed your hand before he could regain his balance, dragging you up the stairs.

You heard your father tumbling after the two of you but refused to look back. Once you reached your room you slammed the door and locked it. You heard your parents fighting downstairs.

Steve looked at your tear stained face, and red cheek with teary eyes himself.

“Surprise.” You cried.

Steve pulled you tight into his chest, holding you like the world was ending. Providing the comfort you’ve always needed, fixing wounds he didn’t cause.

You held each other while you cried for a long time until your sobs slowed and his arms rubbed up and down your back slowly.

“You can come over any time you need to get away, you know. I can make the guest room up for you- or you could sleep in my room with me.” Steve rambled. “ you’re not pathetic or clumsy, and it’s definitely not your job to clean up after anyone else.”

You smiled with blurry vision.

“I love you.” You interrupted.

He smiled.

“I love you too-“ he cut himself off by kissing you, more passionately than before, more meaningful in the six months he’s been so lucky to call himself your boyfriend.

“Why don’t you change into something more comfortable?’ Steve pulled away tossing you a hoodie that was on your bed…. His hoodie that you stole.

You tugged at the hem of your sweater, and Steve instantly turned around.

“No, it’s okay.” You spoke and be slowly turned. He watched you pull the sweater over your head, he watched the bruises appear on your skin, the scars. Both littered on your body like stars in the sky

He felt himself get emotional. You pulled on the new hoodie and went to hold him like he’d held you. Steve couldn’t understand how someone could possibly hurt you. You were the nicest person he’d ever known.

He hated your father. Hated him.

From then on Steve made sure you felt safe always, he made an effort not to raise his voice or take you to loud places, he made sure you were comfortable with every touch he ever placed on your skin. You ended up staying with Steve ,more often than your own house.

He would hold you as you cried when something did happen. And he would kiss all the marks better.

You felt a weight lifted off your shoulders now that steve knew. You told him things about your childhood that you had never told anyone before. He would never admit this to you but those storied kept him up later than his memories of the upside down did.

One night, when you were cuddled up in Steve’s bed in that same hoodie from Christmas Eve 2 years ago. With less bruises on your body than you’d had in years. You smiled to yourself.

“Steve.” You whispered.

He grumbled into his pillow in response. Hugging your waist closer to him.

“Thank you.” You whispered.

“For what?” He grumbled half asleep.

“Just thank you.”

[wandering-koyote]

Im using this chance to scream about my mortal kombat hot take that turned into a rlly long ramble (only loosely related bc its about two normal humans lol):

Everyone says Cassie and Jacqui shouldn't have been in MK11, since Cas has had the main character spotlight in MKX and Jacqui has the personality of cardboard, while Takeda/Jin are more interesting. HOWEVER I actually think they deserved to be in the game 500% more, but that Netherrealm completely fumbled them. Jacqui more than Cassie, like horribly so.

Both really need something 'unique' about them, and MK11 was that chance, but instead Jacqui is just. A plot device really. She only exists to support other character arcs and be a borderline macguffin for Jax to have motivation- her own damn tower ending is her dying to further someone else's life. MK11 should've given Jacqui something to define herself a bit more in the story! Some kind of plot!! Cassie's story is sorta interesting, but Sonya coming back kinda dulls the impact of Sonya, yknow, dying. Hanzo's death is more impactful since his character arc was just wiped, Sonya doesn't get that. The whole "you're my mom who just died but not yet because you're from the past and im really conflicted about this" angle was, as my dad who watched me play said, "really fucked up" (in a good way imo), but they really only confined that to one scene. If you're gonna go at that angle, put ur whole pussy into it babe!!!

Takeda/Jin have more than enough to separate themselves from their parents, so yeah Cassie and Jacqui really needed an extra game to grow. Unfortunately they didn't, they're just kinda static. So im delving into personal story ideas!

Cassie would've really benefitted from gifted kid syndrome- girl just killed a god and saved the world, mk11 shouldve rlly leaned into the idea that shes pulling herself apart to try and keep being the main character. Kid of Johnny and Sonya, god killer?? Make that shit keep her up at night. Make her take charge in every situation where the older characters aren't there, make her self sacrificial, make her want to be the hero not because she wants that fame again, but because earthrealm is notorious for crumbling without someone to protect it and she cant bear to have anyone else shoulder that weight. She did it once, she can take it again. Then make Sonya die doing exactly what Cassie's doing, sacrificing herself for the mission and for Earthrealm.

Then she comes back, younger and a little less hardened. I think it's infinitely better if we flip the whole "ur my mother" thing- make Sonya conflicted that this is her child who is writhing in agony over her mother's death and Sonya isn't sure what shes meant to do. Everything screams to go and comfort her- its her DAUGHTER for crying out loud, but how would Cassie react? Would it only make things worse? What the HELL did her future self do to make Cassie look at her with such mixed emotions? It's mentioned a few times that present Sonya valued work heavily over her family, and that it got worse and worse over time, so i think it should culminate in a scene where Sonya from the past tells Cassie that her future self was wrong- the mission isnt everything, and she has family she needs to look out for. I think it'd mirror the Johnny's well too, since old Johnny literally beat the shit out of younger Johnny because he refused to take his (future) family seriously.

Jacqui on the other hand? She just needs her own damn arc. Keep Jax becoming a bad guy, thats fine imo, but touch on the mother's death and Jacqui's feelings about it. Her damn MOTHER died and the story is completely "ohhh jax became a bAD GUY ABOUT THIS" and I don't even think Jacqui gets to like, I dont even think her death is mentioned around Jacqui at all. I think just adding a few scenes between present Jax and Jacqui would fix a lot. Have the two not talk since her death; Jacqui really wants to talk about it, acknowledge what happened and try and heal, while Jax is ignoring her attempts and distancing himself (depression) and simultaneously trying to protect Jacqui. Replace the Kronika and Jax scene with a scene of the two in a fight, Jax trying to tell Jacqui to leave the military and dodging any conversation about how badly theyre both hurting, while Jacqui is pissed that he's shutting himself off and is basically regressing her into a child as a way to cope. Jacqui leaves in a huff, and Jax alone going "please, i just want to protect my little girl", queue the clicking of the grandfather clock stopping the tears freezing midair. Dont even show us the conversation, just hard cut away- the fight tells us everything we need to know about why Jax is doing what hes doing. I think that ALONE would help with Jacqui a lot (we've acknowledged she has feelings about her mom's death and that she has a conflict with her dad going on now), but going further you might be able to replace the cassie/raiden scene with JACQUI instead. Have Jacqui be upset that Jax is so deep in grief that hes joined the bad guys, and that she cant even tell what type of person her father is anymore. Is he the father that pushed her on the swing when she squeeled 'higher!', who hugged her so gently with his metal arms, or is he the man he is now, joining with criminals and thieves and murderers in the name of her 'protection'? Is that who he's always been? Have Raiden tell her that it doesnt matter who her father is, but who SHE is. Is she the type of person who give up on her dad? Or will she look him in the eye and tell him "I love you despite everything" and fight to save him?

Jax and Jacqui should reconcile before the boat scene entirely so they can get a plot beat to just talk. Too much action for a pause in the boat scene. My timeline of events is iffy but maybe this can happen at the Tiara scene- iirc Cetrion LITERALLY threatens to kill Jacqui and Jax is STILL on Team Kronika after this. CMON. Have Jax switch sides and attack Cetrion when she tries killing Jacqui- Past Jax is a bit iffy to me as an addition to the scene, he doesnt rlly add anything. Have Jax snap out of everything at the realization that its not the military putting Jacqui in danger, its HIMSELF. Have him admit hes wrong, and the two finally get a moment to grief (even if briefly bc the world is dying again). Have Cetrion note this interaction too. Whens the last time her mother ever hugged her like that? When was the last time they grieved the loss of Father? Even MENTIONED Father? Is Kronika even her mother beyond just the name? Hot take but have Cetrion try and betray Kronika at the end of the plot because of this moment, and Kronika goes "lmao no" and absorbs her essence anyway.

VERY LONG ASK I KNOW BUT I NEED TO GET THIS IDEA OUT!!! It also adds a layer of theming around family and love, something thats vaguely there in MKX and MK11 but its like. Hidden and an afterthought. Jax protect Jacqui bc shes family. Cassie is grieving the death of a family member. The villian is the mother of two other villians and kills one and discards the other. Cassie and Jacqui deserve better thats my message im here all night folks

Yesss! The family themes need to hit hard! This is why I’m sad they rebooted when we could’ve had more familial growth, but maybe we’ll get it in the next few games 😭

I don’t have much input because I agree with so much (if only I could ring up NRS and get you hired)! BUT IM POSTING CUZ YOU COOKED FR FR AND NEED RECOGNITION 🔥🔥🔥

[kiss2012]

final 911 thoughts…

k tommy’s entrance in 7x03 kinda slayed ngl. the fake static LMAO

“i’d follow your hunches any day” “it’s cap and athena let them fire us” CATCH ME CRYING IN THE CLUB

eddie’s incredulous happy little laugh when they saw the flare <3

this show is at its best when 1) it’s about the inherent goodness of humanity and how everyone deserves to be saved, 2) when the members of the 118 are in Situations, 3) when they r all a happy family, and 4) when they are flagrantly disobeying orders to save the people they love

TJE BACHELOR HAHAHDHHSHSHHSHAHAHAH

u don’t understand how funny this is to me (person who watched the most recent bachelorette live)

making buck bi in the bachelor episode literally the greatest thing they have ever done.

I LOVE MADDIE CHIMNEY AND JOSH TRYING TO FIND OUT WHO THE BACHELOR IS DHDJKDD

scream at joey’s face when the contestants proposition buck and eddie

once again buck continues his trend of either flirting on purpose or flirting without realizing he’s flirting.

HOW DID ANYONE GET THROUGH THIS EPISODE WHAT THE FUCK ARE BUCK EDDIE AND TOMMY ALL DOING

buck saying he’s “keeping his options fluid” LOL.

look im glad to see harry even if the actor’s different i missed him but WHERE IS MAY

ravi i love you so deeply

oh my god ravi looks so beautiful

“you and tommy have a lot in common: both in the army both like watching half-naked men pummel each other” WHAT???? WHAT THE FUCK AM I WATCHING

so i understand exactly what’s going on with buck right now he is certifiably insane but he’s obviously jealous over eddie and jealous over tommy and worried about being replaced especially with chris and insecure and confused about what he’s feeling etc. but eddie 😭😭😭 what’s going on babe

I LOVE MADDIE

ok seriously did we need a rehash of the WORST athena plotline to date???

BUCK IS SO EMBARRASSING.

oh my god i physically can’t watch this

ummmmm yikes

i’ve seen a lot of people both blindly defending buck for this and a lot of people hating on it and i don’t really think it’s that simple. like i think it was wrong wish we could see him apologize but it is some delicious drama. like suck ur teeth in hand over mouth kinda drama.

chimney pretty much summed it up and maddie was so right…love u madney

maddie’s hilarious for being like yeah buck i understand where ur coming from i also made desperate bids for my friend’s attention. when i was a 14 year old girl.

“so stop acting like one” YEAH LMAO

END OF 7x04. WOWWW THAT WAS A LOT

you’d think seeing half of this in gifsets would’ve desensitized me to it. but it hasn’t.

this would have been the perfect opportunity to have tommy talk about how he regrets his behaviour during the begins episodes and talk more about his friendships with hen and chimney??

tommy. BUCK!!!!!!!

scream.

um im sorry i cant blame tommy for leaving buck at the curb after that hot chicks comment. and then the “bro”??? im in agony.

i thought u guys were joking this is marisol’s like fourth appearance on screen and we’ve barely heard her speak let alone seen her interact with eddie but he “really likes her” and they’re moving in together? um excuse me??? WHY ARE THEY LYING TO ME I DONT KNOW THIS WOMAN NO ONE KNOWS THIS WOMAN NOT EVEN EDDIE KNOWS THIS WOMAN

ohhhh my god that post about how unlike tommy eddie’s always treated buck like an equal partner no matter what from the very beginning. yeah…

denny is so sweet.

MADDIE AND BUCK COMING OUT SCENE MY BELOVED

disaster bi buck fr (affectionate)

the “christopher is out of town for a couple days” is still killing me. where is he.

eddie is such a dreamboat truly who wouldn’t be in love with him

so many shannon mentions this season thank you…i miss you shannon

if you need me i’ll be thinking about eddie’s thumb on That Spot.

this end scene is the best buck has looked all episode the choice to have him literally bathed in sunlight is so real and true

7x06 time oh my god im so scared

maddie and hen look unbelievably stunning. jesus christ.

eddie looks beautiful in his beautiful pre-destroyed pink suit. buck…your suit was a Choice. i will free you from whoever is doing your hair like that pls buck just let me in i can fix it pls

eddie wasn’t overtly bitchy about tommy being there until he saw tommy hug buck. he’s so funny.

HENREN AND RAVIIIIII 🥰🥰🥰🥰 and all three of their outfits r a slay

can’t explain to you how much i love clipboard buck if clipboard buck has no lovers i am not on this earth etc. and a karaoke bachelor party really is such a thoughtful idea even if it’s not what chimney wanted

but once again buck is so embarrassing i can’t do this

thanks we had a…time. HFJFJDKD

MONTAGE <33333 buck and eddie’s bestieism is off the charts im gonna cry…

“i am 911” maddie buckley the woman that you are…

i unapologetically looked at a million spoilers for this episode but i still don’t know What happened to chimney and im scared

kevin and the lees 😭😭😭😭

CHIMNEY GOING BACK TO THE KARAOKE BAR HE AND KEVIN WORKED AT. OH IM SICK

“telling buck no is like telling a dog not to jump your leg” is definitely. a line. that. they chose. for this episode.

I LOVE YOU CHIMNEYYY

home and he went to the lees. god….

IM GONNA BE SAD ABOUT KEVIN FOREVER

moment 1363673 of buck giving me the worst and somehow most affectionate secondhand embarrassment i’ve ever felt in my life

perfect episode no notes. actually one note WHERE WAS ALBERT. but other than that im in shambles time to listen to islands in the stream on repeat

[sga-owns-my-soul]

Pllllllsssss elaborate on fixing Rodney/making him worse I'm obsessed

i hope ur ready bc this is Long! (i'm obsessed too tbh)

rodney mckay is an incredibly interesting character. he's loud mouthed and arrogant and a massive dick. but also, so much of that is so clearly a defence mechanism?? we don't know a ton about rodney's childhood but we do know that the few times he was excited about a hobby (like being in beavers or playing piano) he was shot down (being asked to leave or told he was too clinical) we also know that his family life was. Not Great. he says in tao of rodney that his father always sided with his sister and blamed him for the lights being left on (and other things implied) ((there's also the separate issue of them insisting on calling him meredith but that doesn't really tie into this point it's just another reason for why his childhood was garbage)) so you take this child prodigy who is advancing so far beyond his TEACHERS as a kid that he doesn't have a chance of figuring out how to talk to his peers without a proper support system, and the few times he tries hes basically told he's Not Good Enough, and then you add No Emotional Support, and you're bound to get a guy who's Shit at People Skills.

so you take all of this, you add years of peers stealing his work (i'm sure he was taken advantage of SO OFTEN as a baby in the industry) and people attacking his personality and you've got this hurt little kid who's grown into a hostile grump bc it's the only protection he's been able to find. we see this so clearly in 48 hours, rodney is so excited to meet sam and show off his value knowledge to her and he's immediately and repeatedly shot down and each time he grows more hostile. (he's literally trying to save their lives and they banish him for it like yeah he was an asshole but he was TRYING OKAY)

rodney mckay is a hurt man who just needs to be hugged and told he's loved and valued and cared for. I COULD FIX HIM!!!! i could offer him so much love and care and support!!!! this poor baby needs to be wrapped up in a blanket and swaddled and cuddled until his inner child is healed and then get a nice kiss on the forehead and tucked into a warm cozy bed!!!!! he just needs someone to give him a chance and he'll try so hard for you!!!! (see: rodney and his team)

and then, the flip side

this man is a GARBAGE human. he is so fucking arrogant and egotistical and practically the definition of a god complex and he is SO FUCKING HOT. he destroyed 5/8 of a solar system and i would be standing there cheering him on like "babe that's so sexy it wasn't even inhabited so it's fine let's go find more planets for you to blow up with that big sexy brain of yours" BC ITS HOT. rodney is capable of SO MUCH and he would be the hottest fucking crazy mad scientist villain ever. he rewrote the damn timeline, there's nothing that man can't do and i would convince him hes right and perfect and correct and sexy through every terrible horrible awful decision bc i love me a terrible awful man. i would stroke his ego and fuel it so much he would go insane with it and i would encourage him Every Step Of The Way

[bogbees]

It's 10:30am, I haven't slept and should be cleaning but soulmate au where you feel phantom pain when ur soulmate gets injured ninja dad ver

10:30 AM · Apr 10, 2017

Kakashi feels his nose hurt and it's like "whaaat" Minato/ Sakumo be like "Yo kid it's probably just ur soulmate no big deal" cue confusion

Iruka constantly feels injuries it's alright until he's like seven and his eyeball is searing with pain as Kakashi fucking removes it

Iruka is like "Jesus christ is my soulmate ok???? Are they in trouble???" Kohari be like "probably a Ninja, nothing to worry about"

Cue adorable "well I'm gonna get strong and protect them!!" promises from the mouths of babes. You're crying, I'm sobbing my ass off

They can't dechiper between another's pain on the kyuubi attack. They ache all over, it's painful but they must keep going

Idk if the strain of loneliness and such things would carry over. It'd be interesting but also really heavy stop hurting the dads I'm beggin

So Kakashi goes on more missions than Iruka, gets injured more often. Iruka powers through it and has forgotten ab his promise to his mom

Kakashi thinks his soulmates fucking dead or something. Maybe a civilian, but mostly dead. He's startled whenever he feels a kunai hit him

Cause Iruka’s kids are bad with projectile weapons. He tries his best to keep from getting hit (emotional trauma fr the kids) but yanno

So when Nar steals the scroll, Kakashi is out of town when he feels this thing pierce through his back and fucking panics. What the fuck

When he gets back he hears about the academy teacher who almost died saving Naruto. Um? Clarify ? Turns out A GIANT SURIKEN PIERCED THE GUY

So he's like "this.... this can't be it...." lo and behold, he meets the man a week later and he has a scar. Over his nose. Huuuuh.

That's funny, I first learned about soulmates when I felt like my nose was gonna fall off.... huuuuuhhhh

So Kakashi is Kakashi right. Doesn't want to deal with it (get close and deal with emotional trauma when Iruka eventually dies) so he dodges

Iruka is none the wiser bc honestly, he's pretty sure his soulmate is like, an anbu or some shit with all the trouble he's gone through

And it's like, all fine and dandy for awhile. Bc Iruka and Nar are "family," Iruka joins them for dinner a lot. Kakashi hates it.

But Sakura is keen and will notice something's up with her teacher if he just bails every night and doesn't at least attempt to know them

So it's on these ichiraku ramen "dates" that Kakashi finds himself falling for his soulmate. He really hates it

Actual thing Kakashi said into his pillow "god damn it he's really nice and his smile is---" the rest is muffled by the fabric and his sobs

Iruka tho, he's harder to please. Man's got standards. Kakashi's not meeting any of them with his perpetual half lidded dead fish gaze

But! He comes to at least like the guy by the chunin exams. Whoops he's trying to kill my children???? No sir please fuck right off will ya

Kakashi be like "I can't mope that Iruka MY SOULMATE hates me I'm trying to train soldiers here if I can't have him it's fine bc Konoha wil"

Whoops would you look at that, they're asking him to pop out a scroll to greet his kids for passing round two. You know who'd like that

Iruka would like that. He'd like to see his kids ( their kids inner Kakashi cries) pass round two and see them and congratulate them

Anyway the gist is Kakashi pines the entire time and it's not until he gets trapped in that genjutsu that Iruka catches on

He's like, feeling awful and when he visits with Sakura, she's telling him about the symptoms bc she's been reading, he goes "is that so"

He goes home and considers the possibility of him being his soulmate. It's not impossible, but it's just so surreal. Wouldn't he had said..?

So he laughs it off. And it's not until much later, when Naruto has left and returned, after many weird dates,

When Kakashi returns from Suna drained and on the verge of passing out, that Iruka decides it must be so.

Because he had collapsed and can't move, he feels fine, it's just his soulmate has drained their chakra he tells the nurses

When Kakashi gets omitted, Iruka grabs some crutches and makes his way to the man's room and yells at him for how foolish he is

The nurses will not stop talking about how Iruka had whopped the famed Kakashi up the side of the head with his crutch only to wail in agony

It's all over Konoha by sundown. They've been given the same room. Naruto and Sakura are screaming. Gai is beaming. Somewhere Tenzo laughs.

"When did you find out," Iruka says when the moon hangs in their window, exhausted from the day. Kakashi is feigning sleep but Iruka knows

After much silence between then and what must be crickets playing their music in the fields, Kakashi dares to look over to Iruka.

(Under the moonlight, the serious moonlight, lyrics provided by David Bowie)

Iruka has fallen asleep. Kakashi bites his tongue. He should have said something, told him the truth. He settles for watching Iruka sleep

And not until years later, when everything has been said and done, that Kakashi confesses to having known they were soulmates from the start 11:42 AM · Apr 10, 2017

[yanshuff]

more complaining abt war

idk know how to tag this? tw war? tw inhumanity?

hate how so many people i know are actively posting shit like “oh these ig accounts are fundraising for g//aza!!! Report them now this is unacceptable!!!11” as if there arent innocents people dying there too like wtf???? Wtf is wrong with you???? Why would you not want people to get life-saving treatment they deserve?!?! Just because they live somewhere were there’s war that WE caused by being occupiers!!! Fuck right off

The orgs and ig accs who are fundraising arent giving their money to h//amas they’re probably wiring it to either families or humanitarian orgs like!!! A little common sense and critical thinking wont hurt u babe i promise :)))

stop being reactionary lmao just fight the mfs who keep these rounds of bombing & conflict going for their own benefit!!! Like open ur eyes N//etanyahu’s kids arent going to die in this war but you and yours are!!! Wake uppppp

[thelovelybitten]

vera's first watch of south park - season 2 (part 2)

apparently tumblr has a character limit so lol here's part 2 of my watch of season 2

EPISODE 8:

Last day of skewl !!!!

They just want fireworks :’(

AYO WENDY PLAYS CLARINET SHE JUST LIKE ME FR

Cartman on French horn !!

Stan, Kenny & Kyle play violin that’s cute !! Will note

They all WEAR SUITS NSGNKNGS SO CUTE

Chef get them fr

EPISODE 9:

Film festival episode !! This is exciting

Wendy popping off at Cartman as usual, she just never misses

Oh so stendy broke up??? Depression

“She’s NOT MY GIRLFRIEND!” Do u want me dead? Yes

Stan get back with Wendy challenge ? Pls i need y’all together

“If she holds his hand in the theatre it will be all over for him” Kyle has never spoke more real words

STENDY MOVIE SCENES <3 LFG

Stan scarred w lesbians whoops

Stan slowly becomes an ally, as previously stated in my s1 post, i will make sure that is so >:(

KYLE SINGING ON THE TOILET KBSBGBDBD

Okay alr the cartman ass screen joke was funny ok i laughed

Not them looking for mr Hankey BYE

AVERAGE CARTMAN TAKING CLOUT…

Stendy back at the movies AAAAAAA

AWWW HE GRABBED HER TISSUE THAT’S SWEET OF STAN <3333

So ur telling me Kyle had a piece of shit in his mouth and there’s photo evidence??? NOT COOL

Style “I’m here for u” ugh they’re besties fr fr

Wendy asks stan to see a movie and immediately abandons Kyle HE’S WHIPPED

But also how dare u Stanley KYLE NEEDED U

OH MY GOD. JWGJBSDBGKJDSBKJSDB STAN IS TRYING TO HOLD HER HAND DURING THE MOVIEEDDJVFJKJKNFV KFV

WaIT IS THAT WHAT HE WAS TRYING TO DO THE WHOLE TIME? HOLD HER HAND?!?!?!?!?!?

I’M mentally unwell

No bc end me I’m CRYING SOBBING THROWING UP

HE TRIES TWICE ????F?E?G?G?F no bc that’s so fucking cute

No bc it’s Stanley “she’s not my girlfriend” marsh to Stanley “this girl is so cute i wanna hold her hand” marsh

OMG SHE GRABS HIS HAND AND THYE HOLD HANDS GFJGDFJKNDFGJKFJKDFVJNK. STOPP IT RN

AAAAA THEY ARE JUST <3333333333333

And… stan vomits, per usual lol

They still hold hands stop it

Wendy: i think I’ve seen this film before but instead she loves the ending <3

God y’all i just love stendy so much

Kyle & Stan friendship secured so sweet

Literally wtf i will never understand the talking piece of shit sorry Kyle

Wendy apologizing to stan abt taking him to the films when I KNOW DEEP DOWN MY SON WAS THRIVING BEING ALONE WITH WENDY

He forgives her wbk wbk

Ain’t no back talk on my ship u fools

THEY ARE HOLDING HANDS AGAIN FDGJKNFDKJNFDGKJFDG pls tell me they’re dating again i need them

Oh my god stendy saved this episode thank you

EPISODE 10:

SO WE STARTING THIS with stan’s mom and sister at the hospital oh i know this gonna b weird

NO NOT CHICKEN POX

Omg stan ur gonna get THE POX FEJNCCKEN

Stan and Kyle’s families are so close !!

Oh and liane <3

DON’T DRAG KENNY YOU DINGOS

“IN THE GHETTOOOOOO” omg the TikTok meme is here SLAY i loved this one haha

EGGO WAFFLES FOR DIN ??? ME TOO BABE

Cartman SHUT UR MOUTH

Oh god Kenny’s family is so chaotic i hate it they deserved better

Kyle and stan have matching sleeping bags AWWWWW

Kenny can’t afford normal dinner food but can clap the lights off???? MAKE IT MAKE SENSE

OFC THEY ALL GET THE POX

GODS AND CLODS ??? LMAO

lol not Sheila making Kyle get the pox bc he’s the golden child that won’t get sick

OMG KYLE IS THE ONLT HEALTHY PERSON LEFT

So i remembered that stan hates hospitals and i can’t imagine what’s going thru his head right now besides being pissed abt hw

THEY JUST STORM INTO HIS BATHROOM WHILE HES NAKEY

KYLE’S PAPER HAHA

I’m actually cackling AT THIS SEQUENCE VNVNKJSDNKJV

NOOOOO NOT KYLE

EPISODE 11:

Garrison RELAX

Cartman is perfect for the cheesy poofs comm

Creepy girl….

Omg this poor deranged kiddo :(

FOOTLOOSE a BOP

KYLE ATE THAT HAIKU

ALSO KENNY !!!! SLAY

Kyle is eating these haikus ugh as he should

HYPNOSIS.

Eric kinda popped off

Mackey OMG U DID NOT

My throat hurts >:(

Haha CHEESY POOF

Eric’s one second of fame— relatable

The one time Eric slayed werk

EPISODE 12:

Okay ngl, if this is the episode i think it is, imma pass away

I’ve seen clips on TikTok ok

Omg THE KIDS PLAYING MILITARY OMG CDSNJDIJ

Kenny PLS JNCJDNJKNS

WENDY AND BEBE

“Kyle, doesn’t bebe look pretty today?” Omg it’s KYBE TIME

It’s the way i stan stendy, style, kybe, bendy and stendyle all at once I AM WINNINGGGG

Stendy walks away from Kyle and bebe omg omg

KYLE PUTS HIS ARMS AROUND HIS BACK U KNOW BEBE A STUNNER SHE’S A DAME

Wendy the nations’ KYBE leader, stan the second in command

Stan: no

TRUTH OR DARE LOL

BEBE.

All bebe sees is cake. That’s it. Kyle’s cake. Living, breathing legend.

Wendy setting them up AW

Stan: WE NEED TO MAKE A CLUB HOUSE STAT

Kyle: ?!?!?!?!?

Rare Cartman & Kenny duo things

SHARON MOTHER RELAX

OMG BEBE PASSING A NOTE FDSKBFSDKJGB

DSKJBDSGKJBSGBDKSDK STYLE CONTENT LMAOOOO

But AYO bebe really likes Kyle’s booTAY

The PARENTS ARE FIGHTINNN

Bebe: AYO Kyle LET’S SEE THAT ASSSSS

Kyle: aight?

“I WANNA BE DARED TO KISS HER” STAN OMG DSJNFDSJBGSKD i love stendy crumbs YES

What THE FUCK NOT SHARON & RANDY DIVORCING FSBJKSGDJKGDSDKBJ NO

WHO THE FUCK IS ROY

Get the FUCK OUTTA HERE BRO

Stan was too stunned to speak

Wtf is HAPPENING ?!?!?! Poor Stanley

Stan preaching to the CHOIR

TRUTH OR DARE

The boys are SHAKING

Wendy slayed okay Kyle PUCKER UP

I HC WHEN THEY OLDER THAT BEBE IS A GOOD KISSER and tbh so is Kyle but the first few times Kyle is all tongue and no lip— nasty bro

Kyle will never take a chance to let cartman win that’s just fact

AAAA KYBE

Kyle: AAA

Omg dude it’s ur first kiss relax

“Fucking sickening” but make it with the rupaul YASSIFICATION

Stan: looks intensely at Wendy’s lips

OLDER!HC: stan is like. addicted to Wendy’s lips. All he wants to do is show his affection ALL THE TIME but is also shy abt it??? LMAO

Stan: Dare RIZZ

ROY FUCK OFF

GOD DAMMIT ROY U FUCKED IT UP

Omg kybe okay please let this be good

BEBE GIRL Y’ALL WEREN’T EVEN DATING

LMAOOONSDFNSD

Kyle is flabbergasted

OFC she hooks up with Clyde right after BRUH

But i also like Clybe so it’s okay

Omg STAN NOT THE BEAR TRAP DON’T GET HIM IN THE BEAR TRAP

Alas, OFC Sharon and randy stay strong go get ur dick girl

“CLUBHOUSES ARE MAGICAL” —stan marsh, as his parents are fucking in the clubhouse he built

EXCUSE ME BEBE WHAT THE FUCK

I hope he didn’t do it omg

EPISODE 13:

What the hell

Kyle beating cartman is my favourite

“THESE ARE MY FUCKING FOOD STAMPS, HOW AM I GONNA EAT WITHOUT THESE FOOD STAMPS?” — KENNY MCCORMICK

Kyle threatening Cartman so true bestie

Oh god this is gonna fucking suck

Cartman being flung OUCH

WHEN CARTMAN HITS THE SNOW AAA

excuse me? not the prostitute

this is bad broken vietnamese UGH

CARTMAN.

kenny robbed

stan and kyle playing with the dolls is so wholesome <3

EPISODE 14:

why didn't I know kyle's dad was a lawyer? interesting

little german dance

WAIT STENDY IS DATING AGAIN DFSJBGSBJKGSDKBJ

"hey, elton, if I give you these lyrics, will you write a song for my GIRLFRIEND wendy?"

DEAD

he wants to gift her a song NO ONE SPEAK TO ME

not me actually tearing up irl THIS IS EMBARASSING

but no fr stan is WHIPPED I love that for him

chef hoeing out with kyle's mom??? huh

NOT MISS CRAB TREE. chef rly do be desperate

Mr mackey crowd surfing ended me LMAOO

elton SINGING THE SONG STAN WANTED HIM TO WRITE FOR WENDY :')

WENDY LOOKING AT STAN ugh the fluff they exude

CHEWBACCA

EPISODE 15:

UGH THIS BORDER MAKES ME WANNA FIGHT A BITCH

uhm... this is sus cartman

oh this is a Halloween ep cool

oh WAIT I'VE SEEN THIS ONE ON TIKTOK TOO

creepy murder fish

"hella"

god my paranoia could NEVER

POOR KENNY HIS ROOF IS LEAKY :(

JESUS christ that goldfish scares me

NOT KILL

not the slap from shelly oml HAHA

stan- OMG NOT THE DEAD PERSON

"mommy's little angel" correct, my son is babie

not the SQUASH DFSKJBDSKBDSKB

cartman on some shit rn omg

WHAT THE FUCK TWO CARTMANS

cartman using aunt flo as a massage chair cackles a lil

sharon not giving a single fuck about randy's accusations

oh no not stan and kyle's alts

EPISODE 16:

stan gets told not to go: goes anyway

kenny riding shotgun and not giving a RAT'S ASS until money is thrown

god i'd die if I had to listen to singing for 6 hours

liane is just. so cool ok

kyle: AAAA

EYE- stan that's not cool bad noodle

EW I FEEL BACK FOR KYLE

kenny hoarding food HA

charles: how would u like to come with me to another secluded part of the mall?

kenny: ok

don't mess w kyle brofloski period

kyle: still mad abt mr.hankey

they all getting shot at but kyle has PRIORITIES

SHARON LMFNNKSDFB GET HIM

stan: sorry

HAHAHAH

EPISODE 17:

TWEEEKKKKKK OMG HIS FIRST APPEARANCE AND LINES <3

my deranged son <3 ily tweek

omg tweek's family runs a coffee shop <3 so cute

tweek he's so cute with his little gnome story

oh shit 8 year olds w coffee

THIS IS GONNA BE PSYCHO

OH GOD LMAOOO

Cartman sleeping in his puke yikes

oh he has ADD :'( little bean

Cartman slayed this time haha

Working w the underwear gnomes haha

Side not: my cats are finally sleeping on the same bed and not killing each other <3

OMG Y’ALL HAHAHAHA

EPISODE 18: (SEASON FINALE)

Is this an impersonation of Owen Wilson ??? LMAO

KyLE Y’ALL ARE 8 NO

The WAY STAN CIRCLES DOWN INTO THE CAVE DSJNFJKSDNG HE’S SO CUTE

And there’s the vomit

I’m starting to wonder if Stan has bad motion sickness or he just has a shit immune system

Cartman referencing my favourite movie of all time??? That was iconic of him. grease is MY FAVOURITE MOVIE <333333333

Style fighting >:(

Cartman so true abt style fighting

1999 ??? My birth year??? Epic

“ASSMASTER”

NO OH MY GOD STYLE Y’ALL ARE IN YOUR DIVORCE ERA

Nah bc they are such good friends they better get back together at the end of the episode

When Kyle doesn’t finish Stan’s line abt Kenny… u KNOW THEY FIGHTINGG

THE girlies ARE FIGHTING THEY IN THEIR WWE ARC

Larry u tell ‘em

Overall, season 2 better than season 1, 8/10

[mejomonster]

Silent Reading chapter 72 I'm absolutely screaming. 1. Fei du backstory finally! 2. Luo wenzhou saying just ASK me directly dude! I'll answer okay, you don't need to play games! 2. Fei du shocked, "did you think I asked you out... to get answers?" Baby YEAH WHO WOULDNT AT LEAST A LIL BIT. 3. FEI DUS FLIRTY ASS SMILING WHILE ASKING "ARE YOU AFRAID OF ME" (and for the record if you want a real answer, ask if he thinks you'd kill someone and what he'd do - both you know yall both dancing around THAT actual fear). 4. Luo wenzhou NOT RESPONDING lmao. To be fair fei du just put some emotional fears out (are those UR fears fei du babe?) Which just made it sound like fei du absolutely plans to play with Luo wenzhou and break his heart since he Said that shit with a smile. And then Luo wenzhou deftly handling it cause fei du is HIS hot mess so he's just like "nope I'm not responding to this shit" and fei dus like "I'll lay you out so hard you won't be able to leave the bed" and Luo wenzhou save his poor soul just drags fei du out of the car, his mind trying to cope with the fact sexy bitch fei du just really Said "afraid I might break u emotionally and fuck you Too Good" OH MY GOD

QUOTE:

Fei Du paused, then, meaning something by it or not, continued the subject. “It may have been my mistake, but I thought the old fellow was testing my ideas.”

Luo Wenzhou’s expression didn’t change. His eyes calmly turned, passing through the sheltering sunglasses to peek at Fei Du. “What ideas?”

“I don’t know. It sounded like…maybe he thought I was going to pay an assassin to butcher Su Luozhan and that crowd of pedophiles on behalf of the victims’ families.” Fei Du shrugged. “What, does it seem like my sense of justice is that strong?”

For a while, Luo Wenzhou didn’t answer. He changed his previously indolent posture, sitting up and crossing his legs, his body language clearly becoming more business-like.

“He also crossed off some old case files I’d requested for review,” said Fei Du. “I think I more or less understand. By coincidence, those cases all have some flaw. Some failed for lack of evidence, and in some the suspect submitted a diagnosis of mental disorder to show…”

“Fei Du,” said Luo Wenzhou, laughing, “was Chief Lu testing you, or are you try to get something out of me?”

At the sparsely trafficked intersection, the stoplight changed from yellow to red, and Fei Du slowly stopped the car.

“I do actually understand something of this. My shifu got drunk once and let it slip.” Luo Wenzhou was silent for a while, then said, “If I’m not mistaken, all the cases Director Lu crossed off must have been those transferred over during the original Picture Album Project?”

Fei Du hadn’t expected him to be so cooperative. He couldn’t resist giving him a look.

“Aside from the one who said he had a mental disorder, the others were all unresolved cases. At the time, the person leading the Picture Album Project combed through those cases from a different point of view, hoping to be able to find a breakthrough.”

Fei Du listened quietly.

“They were limited by the level of technology and by the passage of time. A lot of the evidence had vanished, and psychological profiling wasn’t suitable to supply evidence in court, whether from the point of view of maturity or from the point of view of credibility. In the end, these unresolved cases could only serve as research material; there was no way to bring the suspects to justice. The elders and experts involved in the Picture Album Project were stymied. Afterwards, one after another, the suspects in those cases met with misfortune.”

“What kind of misfortune?”

“Some had unusual accidents, some disappeared, and one committed suicide, leaving a note confessing to the crime. One by one, the names on their desks faded away. It was too much of a coincidence. If it wasn’t the heavens suddenly opening their eyes and bringing down retribution, then it could only be one circumstance—murder. The killer was highly intelligent and understood the victims even better than they understood themselves; furthermore, he was familiar with the police’s methods for working cases. 100%, it was one of our own people. The Picture Album Project was therefore called to an immediate halt, and everyone involved was suspended and investigated.”

At this point, Fei Du understood why, when Tao Ran had asked about the Picture Album Project at the table, Luo Wenzhou had avoided answering. The people involved in this case must all have been the cream of their profession or experts in related academic fields. If they hadn’t yet retired, by now they had probably become respected and prestigious elders and administrators.

“And after that?”

“After that, the investigation team fixed on a suspect,” said Luo Wenzhou. “I’m not too clear on the details, but there was no evidence to charge him with. This person was the key figure in the Picture Album Project. Many of my elders who participated in the project had been his students.”

Fei Du immediately asked, “Who was he?”

Luo Wenzhou shook his head. “I’m not sure. The Venerable Yang didn’t tell me. I tried investigating afterwards, and his file had been sealed. Though from what my shifu said, I think he’s dead.”

“You’re not sure,” Fei Du said quietly. “Meaning you investigated.”

Luo Wenzhou neither acknowledged it nor shook his head. “I’ve already said this much. It’s your turn to put your cards on the table.—Why did you get into Yan Security Uni? Why did you scheme so hard to be involved in the renewal of the Picture Album Project? Don’t tell me you had nothing better to do and were simply curious.”

Fei Du was silent.

The two of them sat side by side in the narrow front of the car, the distance of only a few fists separating them, but there seemed to be a thick, ice-cold wall between them.

Fei Du’s gaze flickered slightly. Luo Wenzhou seemed to hear the sound of one sluice gate after another opening in his mind as their master coolly weighed which security doors he needed to open, how much he needed to reveal, to obtain what he wanted.

When the car’s GPS showed that they were almost at their destination, Luo Wenzhou finally managed to pry a few words out of Fei Du’s mouth.

“You know I always suspected that my dad had something to do with my mom’s death,” said Fei Du. “Even though you eliminated him from suspicion, I still had that feeling. I couldn’t get rid of it. Theoretically, intuition is connected to a person’s subconscious, and I wanted to know where my deep-rooted suspicion came from, so I tried to think of a way to trace back to when I was little.

“I remember my house had a basement that only my dad had the key to and even my mom couldn’t go in, like Bluebeard’s locked room. I plotted in secret for half a year to get the key and the code, then slipped inside…”

Luo Wenzhou acutely felt his voice stop at some complication.

“…I saw an open folder on his desk, and inside…uh…” At this point, Fei Du seemed to choke on air; he began to cough. He looked outside, closed the car window, and continued somewhat hoarsely, saying, “I’m sorry, I choked.—Inside was a paper. I gave it a rough look. I was little then, I only just knew how to read. I only vaguely remember terms like ‘vicious case’ and ‘psychological trauma.’ The name on the paper was ‘Fan Siyuan.’ I investigated him later, but found that he was a mystery. Aside from his teaching at Yan Security Uni, there were no other leads.”

Luo Wenzhou didn’t reply. He could tell at once that Fei Du was talking nonsense—he’d seen all kinds of papers on his parents’ desks when he was little, and aside from the time he’d gotten hit when he’d torn up his dad’s meeting notes and folded them into an airplane, he couldn’t remember a single punctuation mark of any of them.

“Why would a businessman have that in his secret study? Don’t you think it’s strange?” Fei Du drove the police car into Heng’ai Private Hospital’s parking lot. “After I broke in, my dad stopped using the place and moved everything in it, not leaving anything behind. In all these years I still haven’t found where he put those things.—That mysterious paper is my last memory.”

“Oh,” Luo Wenzhou replied flatly. When the car had come to a stop, he unfastened his seatbelt. It was unclear whether he’d accepted Fei Du’s part true, part false explanation. “If you want to ask about something after this, you can just ask me straight out. I like to say things clearly. If I can tell you, I’ll answer right away. You don’t need to peddle sex appeal. If I can’t say, then even if my brain cells are missing half their chromosomes, I still won’t say a word. You don’t need to use such roundabout tactics against me.”

After a pause, Fei Du finally realized what he meant. “Wait, you think I asked you out because of this?”

Luo Wenzhou ignored him and went to open the door. Fei Du grabbed his shoulder.

“Shixiong.” Not only was Fei Du not angry, he was smiling. “I’ve wanted to ask for a long time, are you a little afraid of me?”

Luo Wenzhou nearly raised his eyebrows past the frames of his sunglasses. “Afraid of you? Why would I be afraid of you?”

“Afraid I’ll squander your emotions, afraid I’m not in earnest, afraid you won’t be able to control yourself with me and won’t be able to end things…” One word at a time, Fei Du said, “Which of my guesses is right?”

Luo Wenzhou’s expression sank. He lifted a hand to shake him off. “You’re overthinking…”

Fei Du said, “Or afraid I’ll make it so you can’t get out of bed?”

Luo Wenzhou: “…”

Never in his life had he seen someone who dared to boast so shamelessly. It really was an enriching experience.

Luo Wenzhou was speechless. He simply shut his mouth and pulled Fei Du out of the car.

[hobidreams]

damn babes, life is really putting us through the wringer huh😭 post-covid effects are truly wild right?? i remember for my mom, the effects were similar to yours, but for me it made me more sensitive to tastes?? if it’s any consolation, it went away completely for me n my mom after a couple weeks!!

about summer plans though, i’m def not taking summer classes this time around💀 it sorta sunk in that i haven’t gotten a proper vacation ever since i started uni in 2020, so i really wanted to just take a break. had a conversation about it w my mom n she supported my decision to take a break this summer and i honestly don’t regret a thing🥳 anyways i’m just gonna take it easy!! planning to finish crocheting my tote bag (oh did you ever get the pic i sent of the lil hat i made for my cat or did tumblr eat it😵‍💫😵‍💫), and reading a lot of books!!! i read “the girl who fell beneath the sea” last week and i absolutely LOVED IT!! i blame you for starting my obsession with historical fiction/fantasy💀 it’s based off of a korean folktale with a couple of twists, and i think you’d really like it!! i also got the book that joon and yoongi read on in the soop s1 (almond!!), and it’s been an interesting read so far. i’ll update you hihihi. also finally started watching the red sleeves?? i already know the ending but it’s actually so fun to watch even though i know it’s going to hurt like a mf💀

ok that’s all,, sorry this ended up being way longer than i thought it would be💀 but anyways how are you babes!! any fun updates (wedding updates👀)??? what are your plans for the summer?

the spacing is still whack i genuinely don’t know how to fix it lmao

-🌿

my answer got long soooo cut!

omg more sensitive?? cant even imagine what thats like. im glad thats gone for u now!! yeah i think im mostly recovered from the taste thing now.... but also like... glad i didnt get the thing that some ppl had where everything tasted like gasoline. but my random dry coughing came back two weeks ago and its only just starting to fade again 😬😬😬 im worried and have to see a doctor abt it 😭

HELL YEAHH im so glad you got to take the summer off!! fr, so many people are rushing to do their degrees in 4 years and 🤷🏻‍♀️ most ppl i knew did it in 5 and it wasnt a big deal at all. take ur time and do what makes u happy 💗 honestly, relaxing in the summer prepares me better for the winter term so it works for the best! the tote bag sounds amazing! pls show me it!!! and no i never got the pic of ur cat hat 😤😤😤 fuck u tumblr

omg ive heard of that book before! tbh i dont read a lot of fantasy bc i prefer straight historical but i will have to check it out. my backlog of to-reads only keeps growing. oops. i hope u enjoyed the books!!

ahhh never apologize pls. i love and appreciate ur long messages!!! my plans are in effect rn haha im away at a cabin sort of place, that has VERY bad wifi so im doin my best here. but its meant to be very relaxing and lowkey so im gonna do my best to recover. ive also been getting these headaches on and off since covid, but i think theyre getting worse and idk skckwkfnkemfm. i just have to fix this before school starts.

no wedding updates for now bc unfortunately our venue isnt booking yet for 2025 and thats when we have to have it (bc of my school + timing of other big, unmoveable family events). but we've picked a place + contacted the wedding party and everything is a go for that!! oh my god its so expensive. we've made a modest budget but im afraid ppl will judge us if its not super luxurious 💀 i also have a friend (more like "friend" tbh... its a long story) who put some doubts in my mind about our small budget akdmekfm so idk we're still sorting it out. doing our best to fit in everything we want while still saving for our first home 💀💀💀 but im very excited and looking forward to it!!

[chaosunleashedhehehe]

Hullo, it’s ya boi again. Bored af and you know what?? We’re back at it again with a Twilight first watch/shitpost. Enjoy!

I always like how they run like toddlers. No wait? Didn’t I see this in Chucky? 🏃🏼‍➡️🔪

Bro ur making out with your girlfriend and asking her to marry you. Lameee

Babe ur worried about divorce and you’ve been jumping on his ass for two movies now. I think ur just delulu

See Charlie is the only sane person in this entire franchise. Wanting to save his daughter from Edward, absolute father material. 10/10

Charlie really on team Jacob here. Don’t blame him 🐺💕

Edward really is the type of boyfriend who wouldn’t let you walk to the store without breathing down your neck. Hah see what I did there? But he’s husband material? Okayyy

Bella’s Mom sees the red flags too!! Bella please gurllll. 🚩🚩🚩

Aweeee her mom’s so freaking sweet! Bella pay her a visit for the life of me

STEVE IS THAT YOU??

You know what song should be playing when they’re running? Wolves- by Selena Gomez

AYYYEEEE ITS WOLF BOY!!

Edward; certified gaslighter, lover of liess

Lmao. Get recked Edward. Wolf boy’s got nards

Even Jacob’s getting roasted by the boys.

I love how welcoming the wolves are to her. Very wholesome. Yet she still chose the vampire??

THANK YOU JACOB! TALK SOME SENSE INTO HER!

Mmm yes. Pocket that shirt for later. Let the stank stink 👌🏻😤

Lmaoo. Thought the boy was going to make out with Charlie real quick

Vampires can SMELL people? Huh. Seems legit 👃🏻

“Sthap. From now on I’m Switserland, okay??”

Really at each others throats there, huh?

“Doesn’t he have a shirt?” Bro I don’t think so. He’s an aPECKS predator *rawr* 🐺

Ngl. I actually kinda like the lore with the werewolves. Idk! It’s kinda cool in the midsts of all the Bella drama.

I don’t understand why Bella can’t see her family and crap. Like-?? Charlie could vibe with it- he’d be confused but he’s vibe! He wouldn’t care

“I won’t stop fighting for you until your heart stops beating”

“Well you won’t have to fight for long :/“

LMAO THE PUNCH. SHE REALLY THOUGHT

“I kissed Bella. And she broke her hand punching my face”

Charlie: *too stunned to speak*

Awee :( Poor Rosalie. I honestly feel so bad for her. At least she got her revenge!

Omg Jojo Siwa is that you??

The sniffing of the flannel has me so freaking dead 💀💀. They mf passed it around like nacho cheese dip

Grrrrr Ima angree woof >:/ 🐺🐺🐺

Ah yes. Pet the dawgy

LMAOOO. Bella really had to put out that she’s a virgin. Charlie’s so much happier

OH SHIT WELL THAT DIDNT LAST LONG HOLY FUCK— wait nvm oh well damn

“Sorry Bella, but I don’t want you to be a slut- I only consent in marriage 👊🏻😌”

The mf awkward running with Bella.

OH SHIT THEY’RE EMERGING LIKE LOCH NESS MONSTERS

CHILDREN OF THE SEA!

“Let’s face it. I AM hotter than you 😉”

Jacob really knows how to slide into those dms- and sleeping bags

Edward mf glaring daggers at him

“She could change her mind you know” sir she has the brain capacity of a spoon. I don’t think she will

JAKE STAY- WTF YOU THINK HE IS- A DOG???

Bella you’re choosing the vampire. Why do you need to lead on the wolf too?

I love how vampire are shiny on the inside too ;)

BELLA DONT JUST SIT THERE RUN??? HIDE!! Something useful!!

Talk about a neck breaking experience!

Bro really got hurt on the last leg of the fight huh?

“That’s highly dangerous”

“Well at least you’re bullet proof!”

*and scene*

[baekhvuns]

YOU'RE RIGHT!! I TAKE ONE LEAVE AND THE EARTH MEETS THE SKY 😭

No ok let me explain, this is so embarassing, I have a small shelf where I keep my phone, and unfortunately it's near the bathtub, like it's on the wall where the bathtub is and I'm usually very careful and I usually decide on all my songs beforehand and keep it there BUT THT DAY IDK MAYBE IT WAS CUZ I WAS SICK? BUT I SAT IN THE BATHTUB WHILE SEARCHING THE SONG AND IT SLIPPED FRM MY HANDS (I like dangerous things ig?)

Yes, I found the song. "My everything" played as i held the half alive body of my phone in my hand but it survived. Credits to the song man! But my mom scolded me so much 😭 and everyone teamed up on me, talk about being the youngest! But my dad and i ate mid night snacks as i rambled on abt how it wasn't my fault (it was) 😁

OMG YES ANONS COME BACK WERE LONELY it's actually so cute how we've created a small family like saur happy!!! 🙌

And I just read secretary's escape. 26 episodes, done in one day. do i want you to write hwa like seungjo? Yes. Will I enjoy if he was written like tht? Yes, yes I will. I'll enjoy...every. bit. of. it.

Bcz I'm smitten, I'm in too deep, I'm gone, I'm not even here baby, I'm a hallucination. Such an impact....who's making this a drama? Oh and I had a whole reaction on it, like I wrote every little thing I felt and I will share it, mind you. So you better be prepared!!

I literally have it saved as "webtoon annotation" 😭😭

U were right, I've come back to my my roots. WAIT THT ONE SONG THT GOES "BABY IM YOURS, BABY IM YOURS" :0 NO WONDER! I LOVE EVERY E2L U WRITE! U told me abt ur formula 😭 I caught on it, how first we meet hwa, then we fight, loads of it but nothing serious just bickering, and among all tht we don't even realise we fall in love, then either yn or hwa fucks up, and we kinda go back to stage 2 but this time...very serious. And then someone b/w us has to apologize and we finally let the other person in (Bcz of Kai ofc, tht man never comes to play).

The whole transition to fall from summer rlly makes my throat act up fr fr. Wait u had a sore throat too? It's like tht for everyone, I was just sitting studying on my desk then i felt something stingy in my throat and i thought maybe it was cuz I was quite for too long...but then i realised it hurt to swallow and i, in fact had caught a cold 😔 so sad. I hope u take care of yourselves too.

I better sleep, it's like 1, here or mum will scold me again saying how I don't rest when I hv to. HOW DO I EXPLAIN IT TO HER THT MANHWA'S ARE IMP 😭. anyways I'll manage gn ❤️❤️

LMFAOOOO THIS IS SO FUNNY WHGRBKWHD

this all i have to say to the bathtub story

LMFAOOOO UR RIGHT WHY DOES EVERYONE GANG UP ON THE YOUNGEST STOP THATS SO CUTE 😭😭😭 PEAK MEMORY MOMENT im imaging you two, it’s late night, it’s dark and the only thing that’s lit up is both y’all’s body by the fridge’s light and you guys are just snacking up while you explain to your dad and he pretends to listen 😭😭

RIGHT PLS ANONS COME BACK LEMME SEE UR FACES right!! it’s like a small little town in baekhvunsland i hope y’all rmr u have to pay ur rent and that is by coming into my inbox 🔫 some of u are mad over due 🔫

OMFBBFKWJDKW U READ IT FBNWNFKD CRYING SCREAMING no bc. listen to me. i have a hwa ceo fic ok. he’s a very intimidating boss in it. and it kinda fits him and seungjo’s character

crying this is from last year 😭😭

that is my exact reaction. u get me. im all ears anytime babes

YES THAT EXACT SONG FJQNDKW ITS SO I SAW A VIDEO ON IT SAYING “imagine this plays as the enemies pin each other” and my mind said mr and mrs park. LMFAOOOO NOT U EXPOSING LIKE THIS FJWKDJWK KAI WILL FORVER BE MENTIONED IN MY FICS I AINT LETTING THAT FUCKER LEAVE he’s the therapist for readers and the yn ngl he’s coming over and he’s rover

right!! there’s a weird thing in the air these days, yes i did!!! i have a runny nose atm, rainy seasons and thunderstorms are arriving in my city 😭😭 IT HURT TO SWALLO GIRL WHEJ U ACCIDENTALLY WAKE UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT AND SWALLOW AND YOURE DYING BC IT SCRATCHES i also swallowed in my sleep and i felt the pain in my dream ,,, im much better now thank u!!! pls take care of yourself and your god damn phone plis

LMFAOOOO it’s one over here for me fbwmbfsm readings webtoons ☺️☺️☺️

omg you’ve read the remarried empress right? navier’s brother is so 🫠 HOW. HOW.

[jackrrabbit]

spank bank HCs /// Oikawa, Atsumu, and Kuroo x s/o (18+)

A/N: Been thinking about how the hq boys practice self-love 😏 Kind of a palate cleanser, I want to do this for more characters haha

Tags/warnings: pornography, masturbation, sex, edging, lots of mentions of different porn categories, Kuroo is a little shit, all characters are 18 or older

Oikawa Tōru

Oikawa has a weird relationship with conventional porn. On one hand, he’s a young healthy guy with an equally healthy sex drive, and what can he say, he likes watching girls get pounded

On the other hand, the kind of porn you find on sites like PH is always ugly men fucking beautiful women, and as a pretty boy Oikawa finds it hard to identify with. Like where is the justice??? How is it supposed to be believable that a gorgeous woman in her twenties is really moaning that hard for an aging male pornstar with more hair on his chest than on his head?

So he opts for the perfect alternative: camgirls!

He has three or four different channels that he bounces between. His favorites are the ones that are well-lit, nicely produced, high quality film and lots of eye contact. He never interacts or chats with them though, he’s kind of a lurker

Very very into solo acts and toys. You know those sites that let you control the speed of a girl’s vibrator by donating certain amounts of money? Oikawa lives for those. All his pocket change goes toward camgirls, it’s a real problem

Once the two of you start dating, Oikawa’s sexual needs are mostly sated because…well, he’s got you, and you’re a hundred times hotter than any random girl on the internet. But once in a while it’ll still happen that your schedules don’t line up or you’re on your period or it just doesn’t work out, and he’ll get pent up again

When that happens, he’ll return to his old stand-by channels. It’ll be kinda nostalgic getting off to girls fucking themselves with glass dildos or grinding on vibrators in front of the webcam

But the problem, the problem is that he can’t get you out of his head, and when he’s looking at “jasm1neXXX” doing her cute little striptease, he keeps feeling like he’s betraying you :(

So Oikawa bids a regretful goodbye to his old favorite camgirls, and begins the search for one who looks like you. The resemblance doesn’t have to be perfect, it can be something small—hair that matches your color, a moan that falls into a huff of breath like you do—just enough that he can imagine that she’s you

Definitely never tells you that he gets off to porn. Feels guilty about it even if you wouldn’t care ➳

Miya Atsumu

Kinda the opposite of Oikawa when it comes to porn. His preferences are extremely fuckboyish

Into a little bit of everything. Lesbian, gangbang, bondage, creampie, step-sibling, whatever. You name it, he’s seen it, and he’s probably jacked off to it. The only thing he’s resolutely not into is amateur stuff. Atsumu doesn’t fuck with that low-budget bullshit

Definitely not here for the storyline though—he’ll skip ahead in the video past the setup (seriously, who gives a fuck about why the babysitter decided to spread her legs for the the pizza delivery guy) so he can get to the good part

Into edging. To spice things up a bit if he’s got at least an hour of free time he’ll go through a bunch of different videos, jerking himself off slowly while he watches a pretty girl get wrecked, up until he feels his stomach drop and he’s riiiiight about to cum when he’ll stop. Wait. Let himself fall down a little bit, hold back, drop away from the edge. And start another video just so he can do it all over again

Atsumu doesn’t really know…why he likes edging. It’s very frustrating. It makes him antsy and horny and tense, so he’s not sure why he does it. Once when he was doing it, he got interrupted and couldn’t finish until ages later and it was probably the most unpleasant thing he’s ever felt that wasn’t physical pain. He was seriously this fucking close 👌 to smacking the shit out of the person who interrupted him (it was Osamu complaining that he was sick of getting sexiled for over an hour)

It just…feels good, okay? It feels real good to finally get to cum after he’s been edging. Jerking off every other day can get old, so a man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do

Favorite category is probably public sex! The possibility of other people overseeing is so fucking hot

Overall, Atsumu has a pretty high sex drive and feels zero guilt about watching porn. Even if you guys are dating, he has needs and you’re not always around to help with them, so that’s where PH and XV come in

Absolutely not shy about it with you. Legit if he’s watching something he wants to try that he just saw in a porno, he will not hesitate to text you the link and be like “hey watch this n tell me what ya think”

Even if you’re not the type to be appreciative of his porn recommendations, he will still def take notes from what he watches and apply them irl. Atsumu is plenty aware that porn is unrealistic, but he’s more than capable of sifting out the good from the bad, and it helps him be…let’s say creative in bed

Want to know where he learned that new move or that extremely bendy position? You don’t have to wonder. It’s porn. He learned it from porn ◎

Kuroo Tetsurō

Kuroo tends to get in a bit of a dilemma because he likes sex and his sex drive is through the roof, but he Does Not. Like. Masturbating.

He much, much prefers to have sex with a partner—to be fair, who doesn’t?—but Kuroo will take it to an extreme. If he’s not able to see you, he’ll go weeks without touching his dick for any reason that isn’t pissing or washing

Literally...a couple months after you started dating, his family made him come on a three-week vacation to Hawaii and when he came back he complained that it was the worst three weeks of his life

“You were in a tropical paradise getting a tan and you’re acting like it was a war zone. Stop whining.” “But baby, you weren’t there! I was so horny, you have no idea, I thought I was going to die, I thought my dick was going to fall off—“

It gets annoying.

When he gets his hands on you after a decent period apart, he’ll be like “I saved myself up for you baby <3” and you’re like “um, ew, why are you so gross”

If he doesn’t wear a condom with you, be prepared for the fact that he cums a lot. A lot. You’ll be in the shower afterward cleaning up and it’s like, there’s more? There’s still fucking more???

You ask Kuroo once why he doesn’t like jacking off, kind of awkwardly, after a four-round fuckfest that left you too shaky to even hold your hips off the bed, and he pauses for a second to think about it before answering

“Well…imagine you have a choice between two meals. One of them is a gourmet steak from a five-star restaurant, and the other one is…hm, a McDonald’s hamburger. You can have the burger whenever you want it, but the steak is only available once in a while because it’s rare and you have to appreciate it when you have it. Which would you choose?”

Okay, fine. That’s kind of cute

It’s less cute when you guys are apart and Kuroo gets really desperate, desperate enough that you get 6 texts in a row from him at 1 in the morning implying that he’s in some kind of dire emergency

“babe”

“BABE”

“911”

“🆘❌⚠️🆘”

“please I need ur help it’s important”

“call me asap”

You call him all frantic, asking him if he needs you to call the cops or something. Is he in trouble? Hurt? Is there a home invader threatening his life?

Nope, he’s totally fine, he’s just horny and wants to have phone sex. That son of a bitch

If you tell him off badly enough, Kuroo will relent and make do without you. He will, however, request nudes to help him through this difficult time

Send thoughts and prayers instead ✷