#like i barely talk in class

[euphoricfilter]

that epic relatable moment when you give your opinion in class about the film you watched and now you regret speaking because what if your opinion was bad even though that’s subjective and everyone probably hates you and thinks your dumb because you just have silly brain and will never be able to fully articulate your thoughts into words so they will never understand the whole point you were getting at

[amelia-yap]

AUEGH

[transmechanicus]

The mood of the day is "My battery is low, its getting dark"

[essektheylyss]

sometimes, when tumblr fandom starts to annoy me, I just take a moment to remind myself that at least we're not on fucking tiktok.

[rofax]

It has been exactly six months since my last day of chemo! 🎉🎉

[mysicklove]

dropped the worst essay of my life but at least it’s done 💖

[a-wins-a-win]

i am having Feelings about this comparison;

'...a buried burden born alone...' - Jason McConnell, Role Of A Lifetime (1999 demo tracks)

'...[how did i learn] the truth you gave to me?' - Jason McConnell, Bare (bare; a pop opera)

like from a 1999 character analysis standpoint, i think it's really helpful to be able to look at that line and extrapolate a similar internal struggle as what Peter is dealing with, to understand why this Jason did what he did the way that he did it. Without as much time spent with/on him in the recording we have it's harder to put together a full picture of his & Peter's relationship and the way it progresses - but I think being able to look at this Jason's queerness as a pre-existing struggle only exacerbated by his feelings for/relationship with Peter allows for a little more nuance and/or compassion when discussing his suicide.

in much the same way, this concept that b;apo Jason didn't know he did and/or didn't know he could love anyone [but boys in particular] until he met and developed that connection with Peter is SUPER DUPER interesting in regards to analysing & explaining his behaviour as well - especially as it relates to his suicide and the sheer totality of his and Peter's break-up. Not only did this Jason lose his soulmate, but he also lost a really significant part of himself (in the sense that he doesn't know how to allow his queerness to exist outside of the confines of his relationship with Peter)

[softquietsteadylove]

So… have you watched or played The Last of Us? If you have, could you write Thena and Gilgamesh meeting after a fight with a few clickers?

Gil panted behind his palm. Even his heavy breathing was liable to get him killed in a situation like this. Fuck.

Half the party was already dead.

Between the upper floor and the lower, they had split up. He didn't know everyone--hell, he didn't really know anyone. No one had to know anyone in their little section of city life, and he liked it that way. But any loss was a loss, and it meant more food for those things.

Two clickers, as far as he could gather. One was on the mezzanine level, trying to flush out the rest of the team. The other was on the lower level, already spreading cordyceps to those below. Fuck.

Gil slowed his breathing. He looked up at the broken skylight. There was still some glass in it, but it was mostly a big ass hole letting in the elements now. If only he could get eyes on them. He was one of three of them who had real experience in the field.

He always tried to tell people he grew up in America, but he spoke the language. Then he would say that everyone had to do mandatory service, but that still meant he had firearms training. Didn't matter if it was the Korean forces or US army, they wanted anyone who could hold a gun and not shoot their own nuts off.

The other two were the team leads, did this regularly. One was a sharpshooter, talkative but also deceptively observant. Gil didn't know if he had served or if he just had perfect eyes, but either way, he was always on the scope. The other one was definitely the kind of guy who liked his time in service. He was tightly wound, always had a stick up his ass, liked barking orders.

The only other one Gil even somewhat recognized was the woman.

He didn't know her name either, but he knew that the sharpshot called her 'T'. He referred to her as Blondie in his head sometimes, only because, well, fuck--he didn't think a person could get any blonder than she was. Not in the dumb way.

On the contrary, she seemed lethally sharp. He had seen her around. She kept quiet, kept to herself. But he had seen her use sign language and she was light on her feet; those were already two assets that made her pretty much royalty to the field team.

Gil flinched back as that sickening sound drew closer. That creaking, croaking click that gave the things their name. He looked down at the floor.

Blondie was waving at him.

He looked up from the puddle. She was in a pretty good spot, actually. She was up on one of the higher shelves, crouched like a fucking cat. Her hands moved but he made a face and shook his head.

She gave up on the real sign language. She had eyes on them. One was right behind him. The other was downstairs. Their own were each pinned in the crook of a corner. Better to deflect that thing's sounds.

Gil nodded. This was their best bet. He looked at her and angled his rifle.

She shook her head. It wasn't a good shot. And even if the other one was downstairs, it would just come charging up at them as soon as they made any real noise. And those it was infecting now would follow.

Gil tilted his head back again. Why had he agreed to raid duty again?

Oh right, he was just feeling particularly miserable about things. And he wanted off body duty--anything but hauling the lifeless sacks around all day. Maybe something in the kitchens.

Blondie was waving again. She pointed up at the skylight.

Gil shook his head. What was the busted ass skylight gonna do?

She pointed again, then at him, then up. She mimicked taking the shot. Then...snowfall? Rain? Rainfall; Gil made a face and she nodded. She was telling him to shoot the skylight. The clattering glass might - just fucking might - be enough to distract those things.

He tilted his head at her, asking if she was particularly sure about any of this.

She shrugged, pulling up the dinky little handgun either Thing 1 or Thing 2 had given her. She nodded at him and then aimed downwind from herself. It almost looked like she was aiming at him, but he could see that she really thought shit through when she had something to say. She was going to aim for the one closest to him.

He took his aim too, looking at Blondie up on the shelf. He held out his fingers. It was on three, if either of them mistimed this, shit could go south very fucking fast.

Blondie nodded.

One. Gil drew in a breath. He still didn't like guns at all. He had never had to use his weapon when he did his mandatory service. Two. He didn't like any of this, to be honest. He wasn't really a violent guy, by nature. But the world was what it was, now, and violent delights had violent ends. Three. All that was left was trying to live day by day.

The skylight clattered to the ground below, even the glass that was remaining falling inward. Maybe it didn't seem like much when it was up that high, but it was actually a hell of a lot of glass that rained down on the first floor. The clicker down there screeched as it was sliced up from above. The bodies of their own also got buried in the sharp snowfall.

Gil winced as his gunshot echoed in his ear. It wasn't really an echo, one shot was his and one was hers. He ducked down, expecting shit to rain down on him too.

Blondie had pretty good aim, apparently. She got the thing right through the temple. It was still up, sure, twitching and all, but the brain was dead, thus no longer a source of nutrients for its host.

Gil walked out cautiously. He peered downstairs. There were only a few masses writhing and hissing down there. He spread some shots around, making sure nothing sprang up to trot up and meet him. Once nothing seemed to be moving, he dropped the barrel.

Blondie gave him a tight nod.

He returned it, looking around him. Dumb and Dumber were already skulking around the rest of the mezzanine, looking for evidence of more of them. True gentlemen, leaving the lady fucking up on a pedestal. Gil rolled his eyes.

Blondie eyed him from above as he walked over to her. A little glass crunched under his boots as he did. She was still curled up pretty tight on herself.

Gil nodded his head for her to come down.

She looked around them. There was a clicker body and a hell of a lot of glass around them.

Gil sighed. It was always easier going up than coming down. He pulled the strap off his shoulder and set his weapon down. He extended his arms up.

She gave him a look.

He scoffed and waved his hands again. What did she think--that he was trying to cop a feel? He changed the position of his arms, promising her an easy dismount.

She had her misgivings, and he couldn't really blame her for that. He kept his hands up as she slowly unfurled her legs. She let them dangle a little before scooting herself closer to the edge. She was really trying not to trust him.

Gil moved forward, grasping her by the waist before she could really plummet that last couple feet to the ground. Jesus, she weighed as much as a sheet of paper. He kept his eyes on her as he helped lower her to the ground quietly. Once even her toes were on the floor again he let go, holding his palms out and stepping away. No funny business.

She continued to eye him like a cat would eye a stray dog. Maybe he could see why; she was an itty-bitty thing, not that anyone was necessarily well fed these days. But the jacket she was wearing really hid how delicate boned she was.

Gil raised an eyebrow.

She gave him one last withering glare before tipping her head. It wasn't much of a thank you, but he accepted it nonetheless. She looked over at the clicker that had been right on top of him and then at him, from the ground up. Her sandy coloured eyebrows raised as well.

He pursed his lips and tipped his head. He wasn't bit, but he wouldn't call this a fun day out, or anything. He shrugged, and she seemed to agree with his lacklustre sentiment.

Blondie looked across the open mezzanine. The sharpshot signed something to her, and she signed back. She even had slim little delicate fingers.

Gil tiled his head to catch her eye again, hoping to be filled in. There were regular classes for sign language back in town. Maybe it was time he actually attend some.

She nodded to him with a hint of a smile. "All clear."

Gil blinked as she walked past him on the way to the lower floor again. "You can talk?"

[daily-whistlepaw]

daily whistlepaw until ah becomes PoV day 1167

I think I finally understand how people feel when around a crush, can't say I enjoy it

[hauntedwoman]

as badly as i want to avoid my mom she is making it extremely difficult

[bunnihearted]

☁️🌷

[yurinullification]

.

[a-beautiful-fool]

i have the sad.

[bloomeng]

what i want out of helluva boss?

for Stolas to acknowledge any of the significant people in Blitz’s life. like he supposedly has strong feelings for him yet does he know the names of anyone in IMP? does he know Luna’s name?? how does he feel about Blitz’s obsession with Moxxie and Millie’s relationship??? like we literally know he’s aware of these things; he’s met Moxxie and Millie and Luna multiple times, he seems to know who all of them are, he even was dragged by Blitz to be a plus one to his lil spy session for Moxxie and Millie’s anniversary. he must have thoughts on this, and yet i feel like he never interacts with them. which feels significant bc if you like this guy so much you’re certainly not even trying to get to know the parts of his life that aren’t even a secret!! even fucking Verosika, she was also there that night and that wasn’t addressed.

like sure i wonder how Stolas would feel about Blitz’s relationship to Fizz or even his sister but that all makes sense for him to not know about bc Blitz goes to extreme lengths to not talk about them. but cmon man not his daughter? not his best friend?? shaking my head.

that and real Millie development but that’s a given

[smokeys-house]

I get that it's not the job of every person who's fluent in their first language to teach it to new learners, but why is there such an attitude surrounding new learners? Why is there the idea that every person should be fluent before they dare speak aloud? You don't have to let people be wrong, but you do have to accept that there is a polite way to correct someone. If you're going to correct someone you should at least muster the effort to do it politely. You don't have to point out a mistake in a way that shames someone. That discourages learning, which in turn only causes even more of the situations that had you acting this way in the first place.

Idk why you'd feel the need to flex on someone who's showing you a vulnerable point. If someone trusts you enough to fail around you that's not something you should scorn. Is it not in poor taste to break a child's wrist when they challenge an adult to arm wrestling? Why are you trying to gain a feeble sense of power over someone who is still learning? I don't get it.

[bericas]

scott appreciation week (day 4) → i think it’s my fault

― Andrei Tarkovsky, Journal 1970-1986