#like it was always gonna end like this but i was sooooo happy repressing it. godddddd

[mwagneto]

well. easily the worst day of my year so far

[safetycar-restart]

we (i) need some more cat!max !!! you know how some cats don’t like other people and will like hiss at them, i imagine max to be exactly like this. he loves his partner (obviously, you’re his everything) but around other people he’s like 🧍‍♂️😾 maybe one day he’s sitting with you in the sun (making biscuits !!! cat!max would sooooo knead his hand on your side and he’s so sleepy he doesn’t register that he’s even doing it but it’s sooo sweet 🫠) and a couple mutual friends come over and he knew they were coming, he just hadn’t realised that much time had passed so he’s just sitting there frowning the whole time with his tail constantly moving against you to maintain your attention !!!

i love cat!max with my whole heart ❤️‍🩹 love you 💞💞

Oh my god yes. I think I might once again be obsessed with the hybrid!au.

So firstly, we said that before you max used to always repress his cat instincts because growing up he was told they were signs of weakness and vulnerability and would distract him from racing.

It's only when you come along and help him that he starts to really embrace it. Sidenote, maybe when you start dating him you just automatically start to do some stuff that you know cat hybrids normally love and Max is so confused about why you're being so nice to him encouraging him.

Anyway, once Max gets over that hurdle, his cat instincts come out in full force. But only with you. He's still very shy and uncomfortable about showing it around anyone else. He's slowly starting to open up to his trainer and some key members of his team, but it's a VERY slow process.

So when you tell Max you have friends coming over, he is NOT happy because that means someone is gonna come and take your attention away from him! As far as Max is concerned from the moment you get home, it's like a switch flicks and he's able to just enjoy being a cat hybrid.

Your friends only come in the afternoon, so you give Max as much time as possible. You even decide to fuck and overstimulate him to make sure he's good.

The issue with that though, is that once Max is all fucked out and tired and just so so happy and cosy, all he wants to do is just lay on your chest and kneading your tummy and purring. Which you let him do of course, you could never deny him that.

Except that your friends arrive before Max has gotten his fill of post sex cuddles and snoozing and he is NOT happy. You tell him that he can stay in the bedroom and you'll just tell your friends that he isn't there, but no! No that's even worse because then he wouldn't even be able to see you!

Which is how you end up sharing a couch with a very pissed off Max who has his tail very firmly wrapped around you and is refusing to engage in conversation. Luckily, your friends are understanding and know how territorial cat hybrids can be so honestly it just tells them that you're clearly keeping Max very happy.

When your friends leave, Max is immediately rubbing himself ALL over the couches and pillows and stealing some of your hoodies to do the same with because now the apartment smells like your friends and max does not like it.

Once he's satisfied, he just plonks down on you and rubs his head against you until you start patting his back and stroking him and you have to do this for like two hours before Max forgives you for ending post sex cuddles early.

[campingwiththecharmings]

hi :) this request isn't on the list you reblogged but i saw this on another post and thought it'd be cute for poe maybe holiday-themed idk your the expert :) thank u so much <3

“Apparently all our friends have a bet going that we end up together.”

Midnight

AN: Thank you for requesting this, nonnie. I'm so sorry I didn't get something out to you earlier. Hopefully this is okay! 🤞💖 (also there is technically a new years-y holiday in Star Wars canon according to Wookieepedia sooooo 😜).

(Un-beta'd)

Rated: T Words: 733 Pairing: Poe Dameron x GN!Reader Warnings: kissing, friends to lovers, possibly terrible writing. AO3

——————

“We don't have to do this, you know,” he half-shouts, leaning closer so you can hear him over all the commotion in the room. “It's just a silly tradition.” 

You lean back a little, shaking your head as you shout back. “What? No, it's fine.”

“You sure?”

“I’m sure, Dameron. Why’re you trying to talk me out of this? Does my breath smell bad or something?”

He cringes, his eyes teasing. “Well, I wasn’t gonna say anything but—”

You scoff, reaching out a hand to push his shoulder. “Shut up.”

The whole base is buzzing with excitement as the new year looms, and while you’re still in the middle of a war, everyone can’t seem to help celebrating. The General says that these kinds of moments are necessary, not just to keep up morale, but to remind everyone what they’re fighting for, that hope is not yet lost.

The energy in the hangar is at its peak as you near midnight, everyone around you loudly counting down. You and Poe join in, laughing when there are only a few seconds left. 

At the count of one, he leans forward, pressing his lips against yours. Your breath stutters at the contact, heat unexpectedly flaring in your chest; his lips are soft and gentle as they move tentatively against yours. He sucks in a breath when you kiss him back, your fingers twisting in the fabric of his shirt. His hand comes up to cradle your cheek and you lean into it, sighing when he pulls your body against his with the other. His chest is solid and warm against yours, and you wonder if he can feel your heart beating like a drum against your rib cage. You can’t think, you can’t breathe, all you know is that you want more—more of this, more of him.

After what simultaneously feels like seconds and hours, he pulls back. You’re dizzy, feeling almost drunk as you close your eyes, savoring the memory of his lips against yours. You swallow thickly, trying in vain to bury the feelings kissing him seems to have brought to the surface. There is an ache in your chest at the loss of him, and suddenly you wonder how you’ve managed to go on for so long without this.

You open your eyes, meeting his with a smile, all the while praying he won’t be able to see the longing there. He smiles back at you, his familiar brown eyes almost glassy, as if he’s had a little too much ale. Everyone cheers around you, a part of you registering that midnight has come and gone, that a new year has begun, the rest of you not caring the least.

He’s still holding onto you, your hands resting against his chest as you gaze at each other, his hand still cupping your cheek. You can’t look away, you don’t want to look away; it’s like a switch has been flipped inside your head, unleashing all of your (seemingly) long-repressed feelings for him. 

“Happy New Year,” he rasps, swallowing thickly as he studies your face. "You okay?"

You nod dumbly, wetting your lips, your stomach flipping as the action draws his gaze there. “Yeah. You?”

“I’m—yeah, I’m great,” he breathes, still looking at your mouth.

You should be panicking right now, but instead, a strange sense of certainty has come over you; it’s like somehow you always knew this would happen, like it was always meant to happen. The thought makes you giddy and you can’t stop the chuckle that escapes you.

This seems to shake him from his staring contest with your lips, his eyes flicking immediately to yours. Your heart aches at the panic there, at the thought that you might be laughing at him. You do your best to ease it, meeting his gaze unwaveringly, trying to show him that you want this, that you want him. The panic disappears from his eyes almost as quickly as it appeared, a lightness replacing it.

“You know,” he says conspiratorially, sliding his hand down your arm to grasp your hand in his. “Apparently all our friends have a bet going that we end up together.”  

“Well,” you say, smiling as you lean in, your mouth hovering over his. “We wouldn’t want to disappoint them, would we?” 

“No, definitely not,” he murmurs, smiling as he captures your lips in another kiss.

Review (pretty please)?

🌟 Masterlist 🌟

i am no longer doing a taglist. please follow @charmingupdates for updates and turn on notifications.

[crimsonandcloverwrites]

bhah ch7 can’t stop won’t stop

lmao Dani being like ‘we should wait to discuss kids til after we’re married’ yes doesn’t seem like a giant thing u should make sure u agree on before u make a major commitment at all

Dani is so in love with Jamie sdjkhdfkjg driving to her house on instinct and just like...gazing at her in her old t-shirt and sweats like you’ve finally seen the light girl just kiss her already

god I can’t believe I have 2 more chapters of them as adults just being the absolute perfect match for each other to get through before they finally kiss in ch 11 (i’m maninfesting it no one say anything) I am literally going to scream. Dani will like... feel a little off and it’s all “i need to go to Jamie’s house and also tell Jamie everything and she will make me tea and let me be myself without all the expectations and I will feel better” I AM VERY HAPPY SHE CAN BE THAT FOR YOU BUT ALSO CAN YOU SEE WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE MS CLAYTON (actually I think she kind of does but she must extract herself from her real life first I guess)

oh no the new chapter is almost here I still have so much to read

forget ‘there was only one bed’ this is now a ‘there was only one tent’ stan blog only

thirsty Dani truly is the funniest I am so sorry ur suffering is so entertaining. Dani: literally whacks her finger with a mallet bc horny for Jamie. Me: uncontrollable chortling

the idea of Dani wrangling 8 year olds that are probably just about as tall as her is too funny. tiny legend

aww the lil background Hannah and Owen moments. cute

Dani in a big ol’ straw hat pls that’s so cute

this Jackie and Jamie situation..... GIVE US THE DEETS

hmmmmnnnnnngggg Jamie just straight down on her knees in front of Dani to tie her shoe lace I will absolutely let u have this gay panic Dani u don’t deserve to be made fun of right now

Jamie “I have a story” absolutely NOT

Viola, emerging from the lake in this no ghosts childhood friends story: surprise bitch

these two drunk idiots are literally teenagers dsjkhdfkgjh just get in ur tent

Dani, drunk in a tiny tent w the love of her life: hope this doesn’t awaken anything in me

when we finally get a Jamie on her knees redemption moment-

Dani, drunk in a tiny tent w the love of her life currently taking her clothing off: oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck (y’all really wanted to torture her this chapt huh?)

“dawn was a saffron colored suggestion peeking through a pinhole gap in the tent’s zipper” god that’s a pretty sentence can i pls borrow some talent

Jamie and Dani w kids is sooooo cute they have such a nice balance between them

just thinking about if teenage Jamie desperately in love w her bestie could see things now Dani being all into her w all her lingering looks etc how the fuckin turn tables

“Dani kept a firm grip on her sanity” lol

oh my god they’re both drenched in the tent w the soft lamplight and only their own bodyheat to keep warm whatever will they do

oh wait they also have the heat of their burning attraction to each other they’ll be toasty as anything

hhhhngggg abs

that’s like 4 mentions of Jamie on her knees aklhfdkjgkdjh enough

lads is it gay to imagine running ur fingertips over the scar on your friends back before pressing ur lips to it or...?

Jamie taking the time to teach Dani car things aww

lol not the smutty book

eddie honking at her gets so under my skin like my dude... my guy... stop

Dani thinking so hard about rain damp Jamie and how much she wanted to jump her while she’s in the car w her boyf and MIL. girl

imagine if we had to sit through a dani and eddie wedding before she finally managed to call this off how cursed

ayoooo Carson’s show I cannot wait. omg we get it this chapter too gbless this really is the Dani suffering hours

Jamie just so casually like.... not even flirting w Dani it’s all just kinda observations but every other thing she says makes Dani stop breathing skdhfdkfjh this is so good

Dani has like... a lack of object permanence but with Jamie feelings ok

pleeease the Dani Carson road trip that’s so cute I can just imagine what fun they would have had

uuughhh i wanna go to a sweaty bar n listen to loud music again

also would like a Jamie to press their hand to my lower back n make me lose my mind in a sweaty bar to loud music

this lil jamie dani carson trio is my faaaave

“Girls must be all over you.” and Jamie choking on her drink dsfkjsdhkf oh Dani u beautiful naive angel. god that’s so funny

Robin instantly going for Jamie... same bro

Carson’s lil found family band pls my heart is so full

Carson calling them his sisters n Jamie freezing up bby when are u going to accept these people care abt u and love u like family

Robin is so brazenly just like ‘ur hot’. a voice of the people i love her

Dani being lowkey jealous as IF Ms Taylor has eyes for anyone else babe

Carson knoooowwwwws. When do we get the Carson O’Mara biopic please I want his takes on everything I know they’re excellent

oh my god Jamie knowing Dani’s fave kind of pizza pls I love that so much (I can’t remember if it’s been mentioned in the past few chapters but I remember her being mad that Eddie didn’t in CH1? i love this lil detail) (also I literally just ate vegge pizza I feel so immersed in this experience)

dfkgjhdfkjgh Jamie licking her finger and Dani completely combusting this is so entertaining

fuck n then it gets all soft and about how they’ve been in love their whole lives this is emotional whiplash

Jamie constantly in protector mode but in this really quiet comforting way is so sweet I love her so much

god I just feel so bad for Dani that this kind of insane electricity she has with Jamie has probably never been a thing in her relationship w Ed bby u deserve someone that makes u feel like this

awww Carsons bf

Dani’s soul leaving her body when she sees them kissing oh no

Jamie giving Dani her jacket pleeease I am dying here... the romance of it all

and shariing cigarettes and intense looks these two really are somethin else

lmao even Robin is picking up on their vibes you two could level a building with the amount of tension between u

Dani’s moment of Realisation abt Carson n Jamie just being like... well yeah

lmao Dani subtly trying to figure out if Jamie is gettin’ it sdkgdfhkjgh

when these do two finally get together both of them are gonna be like... taken out by all of this. Dani has only ever known Eddie who just does not get her (and the fact that she is a lesbian so she’s never had real feelings for him in that way) and it seems like Jamie has only ever had surface level relationships with people who never really got her either (while also being in love w her best friend who she never thought would love her back). there’s no way this is wont eventually make at least one person cry a bunch (probably me) with how right all of it is

god Dani is so horny for Jamie sdflkdfjgkfdj preemptive RIP for Ms Taylor when Dani finally does get to live out all these daydreams on her I just know someones gonna end up pulling somethin

Does Dani like.... get that she will never love Edmund that way like is she fully aware of the fact she loves him but she’s not in love with him and all these feelings for Jamie aren’t just because it’s Jamie but because she’s not straight??? have we gone on that journey yet

aw Ed waited up for her

the book the book the book

dsfkdhfgkj oh Dani

“Jamie on her knees, looking up at her” listen-

girl u are so fucked

SIX. SIX MENTIONS OF JAMIE ON HER KNEES pls

THE DREAM

who could this possibly be about hmmmm Dani

christ

THE MEASURES SHE TAKES TO DEAL WITH THE DREAM lordt

“baffled but excited” i think is how I almost always picture eddie lol

dang get it girl take control

aw dani u poor confused little duck. i just wanna give her a hug

Dani dressed as Dorothy is awfuly cute

heh Jamie as a wolf i love her fursona

lmao toto

of course Jamie is well aquainted with the bleachers. cheeky. oh no not the art room. Dani dying inside and then imagining herself there with Jamie girl has got it baaaad u poor lil repressed gayby

Dani is... so thirsty... goddamn

lmao Jamie blatantly checking her out are u trying to kill her she already wants to rip ur clothes off

“To the third floor art room?” dfksdhfgkjdfhgjdhf imagine if this was it they just banged it out in the art room right now n got things sorted

god they go from horny to soft so quick i love the ways they care about each other

Jamie saying the scarecrow costume is fitting for Eddie PLEASE

ooh the infamous hickey

What Dani deseves: snuggles. What Dani recieves: struggles

the MEMES. god bless the memes

this was an excellent companion for my Wednesday hopefully I can churn through the rest of em before we are blessed w ch11 amen

[corancoranthemagicalman]

C’s (1/?) Destiel Rec List:

That gets less and less coherent as it goes.

So here is a rec list by order in which I read them and not by preference. They’re like, All Destiel, because that’s how Post-November C rolls:

First on the list is The Courtship of Combat by bendingsignpost 18k

I KNOW it’s not Thee fic by bendingsignpost that everyone is talking about. I know. BUT, I dearly enjoyed it. It’s the first in a series and it’s A/B/O. (I know. I know. Don’t @ me. Or do.) It’s pre-relationship and the characters are definitely themed toward early-Destiel if you catch my drift. Omega!Dean’s hand is being fought over. This wouldn’t matter to Castiel except he totally told Michael that the reason he wouldn’t marry anyone is because he’s head over heels for the Winchester Omega that he doesn’t even have a real recollection of ever meeting. It’s like the perfect balance of a meet-cute and meet-ugly. I just LOVE bendingsignpost’s Castiel voice. It’s such a great characterization.

I’M GONNA SCREAM THE SECOND ON THE LIST IS ANOTHER A/B/O?!? I swear I don’t read that much A/B/O, but this is another exception because it’s Biological Imperatives (Or Not) by tiamatv  29k

Tiamatv is one of my favorite writers. If you’re unfamiliar with their work, I’m gonna rec more of it to you. No worries. THIS lovely piece of work is a Beta/Beta narrative that focuses on how hilarious A/B/O tropes are from an outsider perspective, but doesn’t do it in a way that feels insulting to the classical tropes. It’s just people living their lives where these situations happen not often but enough that they know how to deal with it. Dean and Cas have several first dates trying to figure out what’s happening between the two of them. Castiel is thee love of my life in this piece. And Dean’s headspace makes for a witty narrative.

If you know me at all, you know this next one HAD to be a regency and it’s Of Lords and Letters by MalMuses 14k

Dean is the master of the Winchester estate after his father passes. Unfortunately for the estate (but much to Dean’s pleasure), he can’t run it personally because he’s at war. Not that he likes war all that much, but it’s what he knows. War he knows. Sam is a conniving but well-meaning little brother and puts him in contact with Mister Castiel Shurley. (I KNOW. I KNOW. I allow Castiel Shurley in recent fics only if Chuck is cast as an asshole, and he is :)) But seriously, it’s SO Regency. There’s letters, pining, propriety, and men in period suits. What more could you ask for?

Y’all probably gonna immediately peg who I am as a person when I say Always Together, Eternally Apart by EmiliaOagi 27k is probably one of my top ten Destiel fics.

Here’s the thing—Ladyhawke is probably my second favorite movie in the entire world beat only by The Princess Bride. (Seriously, if y’all wanna bribe me with anything, it will always be that.) NOT ONLY does EmiliaOagi beautifully incorporate the source material, but once more Dean Winchester is SO Dean Winchester it hurts. This piece is from Sam’s perspective, and his running inner monologue is both insightful and entertaining. If you’re unfamiliar with the plot of Ladyhawke, I refuse to spoil it for you. Some things must be experienced, and this is one of them. Either by reading this lovely work or by viewing the original film, you’ll understand the legend that so captivates me.

OH ANOTHER DELICIOUS ONE and it’s like in that vein of Retired Hunters But Not Yet Together Destiel is Welcome to Pine Shores! by andimeantittosting (Saylee) 20k

It’s always fun reading Dean character studies, and this is definitely one of them. So the long and short of it is PINING FOR DAYS (this was written for Pinefest) and Dean trying to set up Cas with other people because he thinks Cas might want more. Oh, and did I mention they’ve been running this motel for like thirteen years? And they share a bed? *Tropes Intensify*

There is also Dean Winchester and the Patron Saint of Blind Dates by goldenraeofsun 18k which I think some of y’all are familiar with.

Sort of what it says on the tin, to be honest, folks. Dean’s friends set him up with some blind dates and the bartender—Castiel—grips his Purple Nurple tight and raises him from perdition. (And no, it’s not a euphemism.) The dates are sort of outrageously in character and interestingly enough this is a Sam/Ruby fic too! I sort of liked how it played out in this piece. If you’re worried about the Sam/Ruby dynamic, fear not! They were both former addicts and have since been clean for (a year or two? I don’t recall the time frame.) Dean has a love/hate sort of relationship with an emphasis on hate with Ruby since she’s the one who got Sam into drugs (allegory for the demon blood) but she’s also the one to try to go clean first. I just thought that was an interesting take, and one I would’ve linked to have seen the show pursue to be honest, but Supernatural has to keep the hot ladies dead or villains or both haha ;)) I digress. It’s a smaller read but the subject matter is pretty heavy. From former religious cults to the former addicts, please keep in mind if mentions of these things make you uncomfortable. It’s definitely the one whose subject matter stuck out the most to me. So apologize if I’ve missed mentioning anything specific for y’all in the previous recs or this one.

WAIT THIS NAME LOOKS FAMILIAR!??! IT’S andimeantittosting (Saylee) BACK AT IT AGAIN BUT THIS TIME WITH The Winchester Affair 34k !!

SAYLEE YOU HAD TO MAKE IT ONTO THIS LIST TWICE. Another Regency, except this time Castiel is long time friends (with benefits *eyebrow wiggles*) with Dean. He’s in love with him, obviously, so this means that an asshole named Zachariah that we all know and loathe comes around planning to frame his poor sister (Hael) with stealing Mary Winchester’s brooch if Castiel doesn’t find some damning evidence on the Winchesters for him. DRAMA AHOY!!! This is a very harlequin/regency novel. It’s actually based off of a novel called Ware the Marquess as is the wont of the Destiel Harlequin Challenge. Very good challenge to check out; very excellent fic to read. And the author so nice we listed them twice. ;) SIDE NOTE: This is totally one of those Regency ones where It Simply Isn’t Done, if you know what I mean. Like, no one is outright slurring or something that I can recall (and it isn’t tagged so I doubt there is), but it Isn’t Done, But They Love Each Other Very Much.

So you guys know Scoobynatural is my comfort episode, right? Well, one of my favorite things that I’ve delightfully discovered is the trope of building off of Cas’ one-liner about being effin’ married, so have The Nikkah by Maxine (WinchesterPooja) 28k!

Reads like a Case-fic as there’s an entire sub-plot happening with Sam. So this story happens well within the canon despite being canon-divergent. This one does end happy!! There’s a view episode like fics I might rec that end in canon-fashion with Dean repression and I love the pining and all but sometimes I need sweet fandom closure. Long and short of it: Djinn culture? Djinn queen? Fake-relationships? Sam dealing with nightmares? This baby can fit SO MUCH ACTION into a fic.

Okay, so you know the fic with the Bee Movie allegory? (It’ll come up on this reclist.) This has the same vibe, except for the relationship is out of order and Dean is Diagnosed with If I Do It This Way It’s Okay. Yeah, it’s Command Me to Be Well by prosopopeya 28k

Human Cas, back from the dead, post-finale, and Dean is trying to figure out how to get his happy ending. I’ve seen this one make the rounds on fic rec’ing so I think it’s a bit familiar, but I enjoyed it. Even though—as my bookmark says—I usually don’t go in for hurt/comforts with heavy on the hurt because my poor heart can’t take it. This is one of my few exceptions. This one has a healthy dose of Castiel standing up for himself with the bittersweet tang of him literally willing to do so much for Dean. But it’s a Dean perspective, so it really deals with a lot of his inner thoughts.

This one is,,,, in a similar vein as Command Me to Be Well. I guess I was in a mood. Baby, Come On Home by woodenducks 9k.

IT’S SEASON NINE WITH A SIDE OF PINE. What more could you ask for angst? Human Cas in Rexford trying to make a life for himself when all he wants is to go home. But he’s also trying to figure out what home even is for him. There’s a lot of drama between Dean and Cas, because of course Dean wants him there. But blah blah angels and blah blah whatever excuse the writers wanted so we couldn’t have human Cas and Dean in the bunker. We KNOW obviously the only thing keeping canon Dean from snapping was the fact that Cas was not human around him. *heavy eyeroll*. Anyways, this is a heartbreaking read from Castiel’s perspective.

One of my favorite Rescue Cas from the Empty fics is (they'll never break) the shape we take by auroralynches (teresavampa) 9k.

There’s this super cool concept of how Castiel experiences his regrets within the Empty and how Dean navigates through them to get to Castiel. I really enjoyed it, and of course the greatest love story ever told has got to have SOME theatrics and sentiments that are definitely reflected in this fic. My point is, I really love when Empty Rescue fics include analyzing Castiel’s regrets, and this one does so but from Dean’s perspective. As in Dean is viewing Castiel’s memories and trying to perceive his regrets.

Sooooo Epistolary by tiamatv 9k eh?

I love love LOVEEEEEE epistolary fics. I love them. I’ll always read them. And I totally told you I loved tiamatv. This is probably another one for the top ten fics just because it plays into my things. Love letters, music, and misunderstandings, oh my!!

HERE’S A VERY SEXY TERRIBLE LIFE ----> Ties that Bind Us by TheTwistedWillow 13k

Okay, so BASICALLY what if It’s A Terrible Life happened in like, circa-season 13 and Castiel was thrown in with Dean Smith and Sam Wesson. Literally all that I wanted in this fic. I do mean it’s sexy, by the way. I can’t even begin to explain this fic beyond it’s Castiel’s perspective, and he has some awareness that something is off. And being inside Castiel’s head when he’s not Castiel gets me every time.

OKAY I KNOW THIS IS THE THIRD A/B/O FIC ON THIS LIST I KNOW I KNOW The Mills School for Distinguished Girls by SillyBlue 13k IS WORTH IT THOUGH?!?!

Alpha Dean Winchester is going off to war. In the meantime, his family still doesn’t know about his marriage to Omega Castiel (in fact, they still think Castiel is a Beta.) Male Omegas are very rare in this universe, and it is addressed along with the fact that just because Castiel might look different on the outside doesn’t make him any different than the girls. Which I thought was a thought-provoking interpretation. There’s prejudices here—a lot of them against women and omegas—and a temporary character death which actually moved me to tears. I bookmarked this saying bring the tissues; bring the tissues.

THE BEE MOVIE FIC THE BEE MOVIE FIC THE BEE MOVI— according to all known laws of life by sobsicles 29k sobsicles I owe you a great slice of pie.

Sobsicles, my beloved, my bestie <3 (am I allowed to say that? I mean it affectionately. Well and truly.) You REALLY got in my head with this one. This is literally such an insane read that I read it twice in a row. Yeah, whoops. Cas is back from the empty and Dean is an asshole about it because feelings are hard. Here is what I bookmarked this fic with: “Dean Winchester has issues. He gets through them. Like a Bull in a China Shop, but he gets through them. The metaphor works.” And that is EXACTLY what happens. Dean is such an asshole and I LOVE IT. 14yr me would cry at the concept of reading this but 14yr me is a tasteless bitch. This is where it’s at. Dean has so much he’s mentally working through and Cas won’t take no shit and Sam is tired. It’s great. I love it. I know we rec sobsicles left and right over here (and I know there’s a new one I haven’t read yet) but this one is really my favorite. And I know some people feel uncertain when fics/authors get popular in a fandom, so if this isn’t for you that’s okay!! But well and truly this is just one of those in the top ten Destiel fics of my heart.

Baby Jack during the Widower Arc truther here like Trial and Tribulations of Raising a Nephilim by Sickandtiredofyou 14k

I’ve seen this one rec’d before but not enough. Like this one SHOULD be talked about. Because I am a Baby Jack Truther, and putting a baby in the widower arc is my literal weakness. Dean goes crib shopping. He paints the nursery. He does that season 2&3 thing he does where he wrecks something so that he has to rebuild it. He’s mourning. He’s crying. Sam is afraid to hold a baby. There’s a lot of emotions and they’re raw. Promise there’s a happy ending, but be ready to cry first.

Another sam pov because i love my little brother Letters to Nowhere by Goodluckdetective (scorpiontales) 28k

AWWW YES. So this is another Empty Rescue fic. This one plays up the Orpheus and Eurydice lore, but in a surprising twist this is Sam’s POV!! Sam doesn’t know the full story, and we as the audience aren’t granted omnipresence for this fic either. It’s just point blank is his emotions. Him worrying for Dean, missing Cas, and wanting a happy ending for all of them. It’s sort of epistolary with how Sam is texting Castiel’s phone, but in general it is Sam Winchester wanting to save both of his brothers. So despite it being Destiel, the Destiel is almost the background ship since this story is Sam’s story and how Sam witnesses their story. It’s pretty meta in that sense, in that he’s aware there’s this grand story going on and we as an audience know there’s this grand love story happening, but we’re reading Sam’s story.

One of those i mentioned where its like an episode and they just end with tension between them >:((( but SO enjoyable and very much like an actual MotW Soul Searching by Lottiethroughthelookingglass 13k

It is in a screenplay format, but I didn’t mind that. It’s definitely a fun read! I thought the characterizations were pretty grand all-in-all. No get together though in this one if you’re looking for Destiel. Sorry. But it does make its way on to the list because we deserved a body swap episode and never got it.

This is like the third fic by tia and im not sorry and it’s Filoplume by tiamatv 8k !!!!

Its SOULMATES BAYBEEEE!!! But it’s not destined Soulmates. It’s like… soul compatibility, but only AFTER you’ve forged the bond. Self-Made Soulmates as it were. Very achingly and lovingly sentimental. Like, I think I’ve read this one four times in one week? It’s the shortest rec on this list (and while I definitely have shorter works bookmarked, I wanted this rec list to be longer ones for some reason I guess) but it feels longer. Maybe because every paragraph is like a gut punch. egGH. It’s another Empty Rescue by-the-by and Dean’s soulmark (given to him by Cas after Castiel’s Despair Confession) helps get him into the Empty.

OHOHOH LEVERAGE AU!!?! The Jericho Job by giantteenwolforgy 20k

The first in a series and I am SO EXCITED FOR MORE. I absolutely adore Leverage, so seeing this was like clearing my skin with care products I’ve never used. The characterizations are amazingly well done and vivid. They feel so unbelievably real and it makes me an eager beaver to get to the meat of them connecting as a team and family, but the slow burn is well worth it.

Yes, yes, Dean needs him, and need = love for Dean’s vocab but what does dEAN WANT and what does want mean to Dean? Find out in if you try sometimes, well you just might find by JenTheSweetie 9k

I’ve always been a huge fan of metas that dissect Dean’s differeniation of need vs want, and this whole work was like one of those metas. It’s a Cas POV of him trying to figure out how to read this man that he knows so well. It pulls out the angst and it makes me ache, but promises there IS a happy ending and Dean WANTS it.

Shush you know you want Goodbye Stranger meets Detroit: Become Human you knOW YOU WANT IT Digital Heartbeat by Chancy_Lurking 14k

MHM IT’S SO GOOD. Talk about good characterization. This work is almost a time piece? There’s a few skips in the timeline but you get the good parts and what’s needed for a full narrative. Castiel is an android sent by Cyberlife to the Men of Letters for aiding in hunting. He’s—of course—assigned to the brothers Winchester.

Shush delicious content right here mwah Heartstring Promenade by SaltyWords (agent4hire22) 17k

Another Empty Rescue?!? Yeah, yeah it is. Dean is sort of reckless. And by that, I mean a lot. But it’s fine. All happy endings, and smutty endings too. ;))

This is one of two 36-questions inspired fics I’ve got bookmarked, but the sex in this one hits my preferences too perfectly so it gets the spot and this list is getting too long to include all of my bookmarks to include both of them anyways but Seek to Know You Better by ahurston 32k mhmmmmmm

This fic is very personal to me. I couldn’t explain even if you asked me to. It might be the Florida Citrus Tree expressionism in Cas’ thoughts, but idk it's such a mystery (the way you know me) by fleeceframe 20k has got it on the list.

Cas loses his memories for a short period of time. Dean and Sam introduce Castiel to Cas, and Dean and Cas have a heart to heart. <3

A vERY interesting premise in a fool's kind of careless by Paclipas 9k

Dean is SUPER off his game when he can’t tell the difference between Cas and Not-Cas over the summer. Canon-fic.

A FIC FROM 2018?!?! WITH TIME TRAVEL??!? Ye ye it is Crazy Diamonds by pantheon_of_discord 24k

Dean of 2018, married to Castiel, swaps places with his newly dragged from Hell 2008 self. Time shenanigans and Bobby Frickin’ Singer ensue.

This one is ONE I AM OBSESSED WITH ACTUALLY And Neither Do You by callsigntango 45k like if it's not the one everyone starts talking about :((( is SO GROSS how callsigntango describes the empty and i lOOOVEEEE ITTTTT. Also plays into a Florida myth I totally forgot about so high-key freaked me out. Hahah.

[aw-eather]

Heather Watched the Extended Threads.

As if I haven’t already had a bad morning, lets emotionally torture ourselves shall we. Here is my running commentary:

Under a read more cause it was 8 pages of notes. 

That Previously On just shows that the main point of this episode is to get Sam and Jack together so if y’all don’t think they’re together after this, I have some news for you.

Gucci Douchebag making an appearance in the Previously On is not my idea of fun

JACOB I MISS YOU I AM ALREDY CRYING GOD HELP ME

Alright the episode has started with KERRY JOHNSON LOVE OF MY LIFE

Sam, you can’t be jealous, you’re literally MARRYING ANOTHER MAN.

Lol Jack you moron as if Daniel would walk through the door right now.

Sam is glaring at you funny just fyi.

But he’s right, Daniel is just waiting for y’all to be nice about him.

Oma I would like to order a plate of fucks to give about Daniel’s story at this point

Teal’c of the Tau’ri is a cute title I love that man

Aww I feel so proud of Teal’c.

FUCK OFF PETE

JAAACOOOB

Pete is so cringy

Jacob let Jack call him Dad once.. Pete has to wait until after marriage.

This is awkward as fuck

Pete you are so insensitive,

Jacob hates him. Same honestly.

You can tell he hates him tho, he’s not hiding it. My partners mum did a better job and she’s homophobic.

Sam is SO NOT in love with this guy

Oma being cryptic, checks out

Anubis makes me wanna punch someone.

This episode is really just tying up loose threads (probably hence the title) but its nice to know Pete is considered a loose thread 😊

Teal’c having to decide between the Jaffa and the Tau’ri is sad

Agh the newspaper and Daniel finding out about plans is an aggravating storyline

“I’m gonna marry him” reads the same as “Dad, I am happy”. Honey who are you trying to convince??? We don’t believe you.

“I know how happy he makes you” *Cut to Sam who looks nonchalant* *cut to Jacob who knows exactly what he’s doing and what he’s doing is attempting to stop her marrying Gucci Doucebag*

Selmak isn’t alive to make that call Jacob stop lying

I’M GONNA CRY AGAIN

She is really thinking about this. Like she looks like she’s second guessing herself constantly.

KERRY

JACK

KERRY AND JACK

JACK AND KERRY

WAKING UP TOGETHER

OH I LOVE THEM SO MUCH!

I love how soft and tender he is with her, I imagine he’d be the same with Sam.

I love how he cuddles her and kisses her and plays with her hair and that hand on her face I--- *insert heart eyes*

I just really love them so much I wish we got more of soft, boyfriend Jack

Trouble in Jaffa land lol

I think he did really like her though.

Anyway back to Half Ascended!Daniel

Oma ya shouldn’t have helped the first two times, that’s the fucking problem babe

I literally do not give a shit about Daniel, I’m sorry. I really try but I can’t

OH NO THE PHONE CALL SCENE

She is SO sick of Gucci Douchebag

I can’t believe he called her at WORK over FLOWERS

AND SAYING ITS URGENT FUCK SAKE

I love Peter in the back

Jack watching her

Jacob is playing matchmaker so hard I fucking love him

Sam’s face tho is sooooo funny LIKE DAD SHUT UP WE DON’T MENTION THIS IN FRONT OF MY CO

Oh the little sigh he does before telling her to go pick flowers I can’t handle that man, he’s so heartbroken its like a lost puppy

Jack smiles but his eyes say oh yeah, I lost her and she’s happy with someone else now. PLOT TWIST: she’s miserable

Sam looks hurt because she still loves Jack

FUCK ME IT HURTS THEY DESERVED MORE

Jacob don’t play dumb babe, we know what you’re trying to do

Oh she MAD MAD at Dad

Why is it ok to break some rules and not others, you ask? Because y’all are white and can get away with it?

Oma just stop helping people. You don’t need to help them, just stop. I don’t want to be an ascended being y’all suck

Chocolate or vanilla like go HOME WE DON’T WANT YOU HERE

Sam shaking her head no about getting blown up by aliens is so cute I love her so much

This feels like friends talking

Or like these two people I know who claim they’re in love but its always soooo awkward around them.

Generally speaking that’s my type like you haven’t had two alien boyfriends in the last 8 years babe

“I have a surprise for you” YOU BOUGHT A FUCKING HOUSE WITHOUT TELLING HER YOU CRETIN

THAT’S NOT A SURPRISE THAT’S CONTROLLING AND WEIRD

I hate that she looks happy. Don’t get me wrong I want her happy, I really do. And as much as I’m sure she loved Pete, she wasn’t in love with him. But I suppose she was happy for the first time with some one she could have… feelings are complicated, best not to have them honestly.

Jack has really long eyelashes. Just an observation.

That’s a lotta sugar, Danny boy. And Its not gonna make you any sweeter, I promise.

I love that he took the cup with him like he’s gonna drink it with THAT much sugar in it

Exposition, exposition, exposition.

Go away Anubis ya pain In the arse.

Oh the HOUSE

Have I said how much I hate that outfit cause I hate that outfit

It is a beautiful house to be fair but like…

Look at the PANIC in her eyes

I already have a problem with how they got engaged and the fact they stayed together after he STALKED HER.

Pete’s ability to control a situation and guilt trip her (literally he ran away and had her investigated by the FBI when she wouldn’t tell him about her work) reminds me of my ex. Which is probably why I hate him so damn much.

THE DECK SCENE

HER LOOKING AT HIS HOUSE

THE MUSIC

HE LOOKS GOOD IN DARK BLUE

I’M SORRY ITS ALL IN CAPS I’M TYPING AND WATCHING AND I’M SCREMING ON THE INSIDE DEAL WITH IT FAM I’M SORRY

THAT SMALL GRIN ON HIS FACE WHEN SHE SAYS SHE’S BEEN WORKING UP THE NERVE TO COME AND TALK TO HIM

TRUTH IS I’VE BEENTRYING TO WORK UP THE EVER FOR A LOT LONGER THAN THAT STOOP

ITS NOT GREAT JACK

YEAH BUT JACK HAS AN EVEN NCER HOSUE

SECOND THUGHTS

YES YOU ARE. GIANT MISTAKE INFACT

SHE’S REHEREDSE THIS SO MANY TIMES

KERRY FUCK OFFF NOW IS NOT THE TIME SWEETIE

THE BEER LOL

UES IT IS AWKKWARD

JACKS FACE OUCH

KERRY IS SO SWEET ASKING HER TO STAY FOR LUNCH

NO NOT DAD FUCK

Kerry caught him looking a little too long tbh

I’m not editing typos out of that btw it shows my rage

DAAAAAAD

JACOB YOU SWEET MAN

Oh sam honey I’m so sorry

I’m gonna cry again

FUCK OFF DANIEL JFC I literally do not give a shit

I only found out about Carmen’s death a couple months ago so I’m not gonna handle this well fam

Oh no

I’m typing and not looking again

Because Jacob is gonna tell her to go after Jack

I can’t breath

Six years ago

I’m not letting that go

It’s a continuity fuck up

Not that important but drives me nuts

No you’re not

He’s talking about jack

Come on sam he’s not dum

Everything you want is a house, a marriage and JACK

KERRY

LOVE OF MY LIFE

BREAKING UP WITH JACK FOR THE GREATER GOOD

I really like YOU Kerry

He’s so sad

He really liked Kerry

Retire please sir

Bye Kerry, I miss you already <3

If he told Sam he loved her right now she’d drop everything for him

He’s contemplating it

He’s confused but he’s thinking abut it because she’s stressed right now and ENGAGED but damn Kerry makes good points

More explanation and blah blah

Like if this was the main point of the story, there would be more talk of it outside of Daniel and we wouldn’t have just had 20 straight minutes if Sam and Jack pining over each other

Sorry can we talk about how PETE put a down payment on a house with OUT talking to her?? What if she didn’t like the neighbourhood?

Sorry I’m still mad about that

To be fair that green does look good on Daniel

Oma looks so proud

THEN STOP -B R E A K I N G- IT YOU GOOSE

Fuck sake woman

I’m so emotionally traumatised by this episode that I can’t remember half of what is added and half of whats in the 40 minute cut because I am repressing it lol. Obviously the scene with Kerry and the ones with Pete

NO JACOB

AND JACK BEING THERE FOR SAM

AND THEY MIGHT AS WELL HAVE SAID I LOVE YOU ALL OVER AGAIN

SORRY I NEED A TEN MINUTE BREAK TO CRY

OK I’m back

Sam looking at her like he wants to tell her he loves her breaks my tiny stone cold heart even more

He didn’t actually NEED to put his arm around her but they both actually really did need it

The way she rubs her thumb on his hand and leans into him I fucking can’t

AND MORE DANEIL FFS

Sorry I just feel like this was supposed to be the A plot, Dakara was the B plot and Sam/Jack was the C plot but it ended up Sam/Jack = A, Daniel and Anubis = B, Dakara = C

Took ya long enough to catch on, Danny boy

Good BYE PETE

You didn’t know shit from the beginning go home

That’s the same shade of blue Jack had on before… interesting

I mean it does have something to do with her father…

She will, babe, don’t stress

To be fair, to give him some credit, he took it like a champ

But also don’t be a creep ya know

Why does Sam’s jacket look awkward

She just looks awkward this entire sequence

INCOMING WORMHOLE

What, pray tell, is the point of the self destruct if it doesn’t blow up the gate? Isn’t that part of the point?

Daniel ya tit, that’s not gonna work

Fuck YEAH OMA

BEAT HIS FUCKING ASS

Now Daniel can come back to earth and be with Vala thanks

Literally the only time I like him is with Vala and then its with a push

This seems a little too convenient tbh

I know it was OMA but this episode just feels…. Disjointed

Ah but will you destroy it? Probably not knowing the Jaffa

I wonder if Sam and Jack have spoken by now. Clearly not the same day because different clothes.

I’d say two days since Dad?

Ack Naked!Daniel

Jack is so AWKWARD I LOVE HIM

SAM CAN’T LOOK AT HIM

BRA’TAC IS ENCOURAGING THIS BULL SHIT

F I S H I N G

I can believe it, Sam.

She’s leaning towards him

Aw that giggle

That look she gives him

They’re so happy

This was the perfect ending

It should have finished there

How much time passed between then and s9 I wonder

At least a month right because Sam had been away a month?

Well that was good.

Hurt my heart but it was good

Final notes:

Jacob and Janet deserved better

I want more Kerry

They should have stopped at s9

Sam and Jack are together now, TRY and convince me otherwise

I’m thinking of smutty fic ideas for the cabin please stop me

Thanks for coming along on that emotional roller coaster ride. Ended up being 9 pages of dot points so I’m sorry! But I feel like I’ve said my bit.

Oh one last thing

Fuck Pete 😊

[remushisahoshi]

🖤💜Henry Is Better Than Your Fave and Here's Why🖤💜

I can make any argument on why Henry is better than your fave. I'm gonna make a few examples and I can add more to fight your fave.

1.) Hector

So people like Hector a lot because he is a big swole man who can protect you and he is freakishly handsome and confident about himself, right? Literally Henry is all that (minus the swole but he doesn't need to be swol bean to be best bean)

Henry can defend you with his insanely powerful magical abilities. He knows pretty much everything about curses and could kill anyone who even does so much as to look at you wrong. If you want a man to protect you, Henry is your guy.

And you want a handsome boi who is confident about himself? Henry is the most handsome jou of them all! He knows how good his magic is and pretty confident about his abilities as a dark mage and as a hexer. He never doubts his magic and never doubts his ability to kill. Yet Again, Henry is your guy.

You know what Henry has that Hector doesn't? Forced and restrained marraige. You cant marry Hector in his game, but you can marry Henry. Sure, none of the possible S rank pairs Hector has are canon, but none of them are you.

Henry is better than your fave.

2.) Marth

So Marth is a fan favorite because he is the OG protagonist, right? He is also charming, strong, modest, regal, and a pretty boy. Guess what? Henry is Charming, Strong, and a Pretty Boy too. He may not be regal nor royal, but he never is too overbearing about his abilities and accomplishments.

Henry is heckin charming. Like, he would be more than happy to takw a crow feather and weave it in your hair, compliment your smile and eyes, compliment your valor on the battlefield, comment how gorgeous you look when you jave the blood of your wnemies splattered all over you, exetera. He is more than happy to compliment you, help you out with literally any task, and make you feel special. If you want a charming fella, Henry is your guy.

Henry is like sooooo pretty. Like his white hair and pale skin is such a nice contrast to his deep purple and peweter gray garments lined with gold designs. He doesnt use unbearable colors (using a base of maybe three or four colors) and he is a skinny yet tol boi. He's just really pretty a f his smile is pretty and when he opens his eyes they are pretty. Henry is a really pretty boi.

You know what Marth has? A canon wife. He and Caeda are canon and in love. Marth already had the love of his life. You know what Marth doesnt have? Free time for you. He is busy running a kingdom and fighting there is no time for romance and he would be stressed. Henry doesnt deal with either of those.

Henry is better than your fave.

3.) Niles

Niles is a flirtatious bisexual tan man who is ruggedly handsome and very feline-like. He is also a bad boy~ He works as a retainer to Leo and has a tragic past. Guess what? Henry is handsome, kinda cat-like if yoh stretch it, a bad boy, and has an even more tragic past than Niles. His sexuality is also uncertain but that doesn't exactly matter...

So the tragic backstory part! Yeah, Henry' parents neglected him alot so he used to spend time in the woods where a white wolf basically became hos surrogate (right word?) Mother, but a hunter shot her before his eyes so he had a magical awakening and unleashed unheard of black magic that was more powerful than anyone had ever seen, so the parents sent him away. Depending on the localization, it was either to an Orphanage or Wizard School where nobody liked him and he had no friends because he was too weird. That's where he started making friends with the crows that always hung around the school and diving into the dark arts on his own. He learned to smile to make everyone believe he was fine and stay away because he knew they wanted to. So if you're into boys with a tragic backstory, Henry is your man.

You want a bad boy? I can give you a bad boy, and his name is Henry. Dark Mage? Evil magic and always tampering with the dead and laughing in the face of danger? He is a MEGA bad boy! But yoy are probably thinking the rebellious and sexy kind of bad boy. Henry's american localization could easily go yandere so he could be a bad boy if you really wanted him to be. He also countless times in supports he offers to kill Chrom: Leader of the Shepards. That's pretty bad and rebellious to me just saying. Henry could be a bad boy.

You know what Henry has that Niles doesn't have? Magic. Niles can't cast awesome spells, summon risen, or turn people into toads. He can't kill a person without having a single scratch on their body. You know what else Niles doesn't have? The ability to be a good Dad. Nina hates her father, but in every single ending of Awakening if Henry is married it says he was a surprisingly good father. No daddy issues whatsoever.

Henry is better than your fave.

4.) Claude

So I actually haven't played three houses yet so I am going off heroes and the spoilers I read but trust me Henry is better than Claude.

Claude is a very tricky boy. He likes to set traps and do a sneak and he is heckin bisexual. He is an EXTREMELY pretty boy and, let's face it, a better Niles and he's on horseback! But wanna know a secret? Henry is a tricky boy too. He is very pretty, like said before, and I am having a sudden blank on the mind because it's eleven at night but HERE WE GO!

Henry is a tricky little bastard, just like Claude. Henry literay did go behind everyone's back and learn how to summon risen after all. He also has all his crow friends he can have fetch stuff and steal stuff for him. He is also a playful little bastard if you couldn't tell from his, for a lack of better words, immature personality. He scares Ricken for fun and traded bodies with Sumia just for fun and went on a joyride in her body in his supports with them respectively. He is a fun, tricky little shit and I love him.

Guess what Henry has that Claude doesn't have? Burdens of being a royal and insecurities about it. Insecurities aren't cute. They are little hatreds people have to face and overcome to have a good self image. If people think that's cute then they are messed up. Claude needs to go on that journey with himself while Henry went on that journey and overcame it now. Henry doesn't have repression issues. It's okay to want to help out with someone's issues, but it ain't okay to fetishize it like I know a lot of people do with characters like Claude. Just a PSA. But that doesn't make Henry a better character, just a more internally developed one. And because od his self-development....

Henry is better than your fave.

I know that last one was sloppy but it still stands. Who wants to fight next? I am ready.

[tellywoodtrash]

ishqbaaz 01.09.17 lb

wishing you all Eid Mubarak! 🌙✨✨✨✨  may the day bring you and your family all the happiness and love! 💖💖💖 

(and lots and lots of yummy food. gifts/donations in the form of biriyani, sevaiyaan, and other assorted noms are always appreciated at tellywoodtrash. 😊😊😊) 

anika’s hungry. (jism ki bhook? 😆😆😆)

ohhhhhhh yeahhhhh, billu’s here to mitaaofy The Bhook. 😏😏😏

god his hair is so fucking ugly like this, please can he go back to his old non golden hair. or at least put it up in the “i’ve been electrocuted” shock-puff instead of this weird side comb over a la mahi. i can’t concentrate on the hotness of the scene thanks to this! 😣😣😣

whoooooop, the truth of the pav bhaji is out. 😬😬😬

billu’s like you’re no gordon ramsay yourself, missy. 🙄🙄🙄

BLOODY DADI. WHY WON’T YOU LEAVE THEM ALONE????/ 😒😒😒

PFFFFFT, SHE’S PUTTING HIM BEHIND THE MOST TRANSLUCENT CURTAIN IN THE UNIVERSE. 😑😑😑

eeeeeeeeeee. 😍😍😍

lord bless rudra, the stupid cupid of this house. 👼🏽👼🏽👼🏽 doodho nahaao, phoolo phalo, mere laal. 😌😌😌

waaah! billu taking anika out for pav bhaji date! who are you and what have you done to our organic and clean-eating billu? 😯😯😯

ugh pinkyyyyy ka nonsense. 😤😤😤

shaktiji has had enough of this garbage. same, shaktiji, same. 😑😑😑

did om get his satyavaadi side from chote papa? 🤔🤔🤔

goddddddd, anika is going to get the keeda to fix this mess now. GIRL NO. PLEASE. FFS, PLEASE. 😫😫😫

oh. of course he got a pav bhaji thela INSIDE oberoi mansion. this extra ass fucker. 🙄🙄🙄

ok i’ve said pav bhaji so many times in the past two days, that now i really want it. GODDAMNIT I’M SUPPOSED TO BE EATING CLEAN TOO. FML. 😩😩😩😩😭😭😭😭

lmaooooo she almost passed out from another pav bhaji induced (mouth) orgasm 😆😆😆

shivaay, you’re really facing tough competition. i really doubt you’ll be able to bring her to such ecstasy. 😝😝😝

“kya hua, theek nahi hai? daantoon mein usse?” 

ouff billu! 

“kaisi hai? boliye!” “khaate waqt bolna nahi chahiye.” “koi nahi. main bolti hoon. aap bhi boliye!” *quietly to himself* “tum bohut bolti ho.” 

i can’t handleeeeee his adorbz. 😚😚😚

“main raat mein citric acid nahi leta.”

god this man and his insane dietary rules. 😒😒😒

ugh they’re so cuteeeee on their ridiculous improvised date. 💖💖💖

oh boy, she’s gonna bring up pinky. girl whyyyyyyyyyyyyy. 😣😣😣

yup. called it. billu’s repressing all his feelings about this. it’s going to come out as a jwaalamukhi at some point. *sigh* 😔😔😔

this is the most normal outfit i’ve seen shivaay in since forever. he’s looking verrrrrrrrrrrry nice. 😍😍😍

these challenges are so amateur and childishhhhhhhhhhhh. they’re grownass adults, bruh. who’ve already been married for like, a year. 😑😑😑

ohhhhh boy. i don’t even know what to expect with this. 😟😟😟

pffffffft, he doesn’t sound anything like her, other than all the catchphrases. 🙄🙄🙄

i am loving rudra’s delight at all this though. what a cutie. 😌😌😌

lmaoooooooooooooo rudra singing O JAANA. such meta. 

ya gaana sab ko sunaayi deta hai??? 🤔🤔🤔

apparently rudra’s changed teams and is fully on bhaiyya’s side today. 😊😊😊

bhaiyya’s using opportunity to CLOSELY OBSERVE bhaabi 😚😚😚

anika’s turn! 

she’s better at this than he is! she’s got the phone waali tadi down pat! 

hein? “what the”? behenji yeh aapke pati ka dialogue nahi hai! 😟😟😟

aaaaaaand there goes the phone. 😬😬😬

damn girl, dat booty tho. 👅👅👅💦💦💦

um yeah, billu looks turned on af. 😏😏😏

aaaaaaand pinky’s here to ruin everything. 😒😒😒

my poor boy though. he’s sooooo close to tears. 😥😥😥

(great subtle acting by nakuul here, the clenched jaw, the pained swallowing. bruh, why can’t you be this toned down and effective in all scenes???) 

god, this tapasya nonsense again. 🙄🙄🙄

“MRS. OBEROI” 

yup. def taking a leaf outta omki’s book. 

he’s righteously outraged on HER behalf. she’s heartened and all dreamy eyed at her suddenly amazing pati, but oh, the guiltttttt. 😐😐😐

time for dadi to lecture. 😒😒😒

teesra challenge is... poverty? 🤔🤔🤔

hardy har har, what a fun game for these outrageously rich people to play! 😑😑😑

oh god, shivaay has to go live in a chawl. 😟😟😟

‘oh my god, i have to call the chawl ppl and warn them what’s coming. 😕😕😕’

billu’s overly confident. my god son, you should be hella scared. you won’t be able to survive. i’m middle class and *I* can barely survive middle class life in india before screaming to be put back on a plane home. 😶😶😶

rudra: yeh toh koi reality show jaise ho gaya; end mein bhaiyya bolenge “i’m SSO, mujhe is ghar se baahar nikalo!!!” 

“zero sambhaal ke!”

200 rs. dude. one of billu’s fancyass coffees for the day costs more than than. 😗😗😗

lmao “woh burger waala meal kar lena. veg. non veg toh aayega nahi.” 😂😂😂

yuppppp, no one’s nikaaling the gaadi for you, son. bus se jaa. 🚌🚌🚌

ok even the kurta he’s changed into is tooooooo fancy. 😕😕😕😕

dude, you have just 200 rs for the day. auto mein jayega toh 50% of the funds are gonna be over in that ride. 😣😣😣

LMFAO HE NEEDS TO BE HELPED UP INTO THE AUTO 😆😆😆

lmaooooooooooo SEAT BELT KAHAN PE HAI hahahahahaha 🤣🤣🤣

of course, he’s worried about his hair. 🙄🙄🙄

LOL AUTOWAALA IS PLAYING THE NATIONAL ANTHEM OF ALL AUTOWAALAS: TUM TOH TEHRE PARDESI. HAHAHAHA. 🤣🤣🤣🤣

anika just lost her patience and told him to stop being an ass to the autowaala. lmaoooooo look at him sulkkkk. 😚😚😚

lololol everytime he wants to be called “hot” instead of cute, the universe sends him a sign that it’s not meant to be; pehle daadi, ab road mein khadda thanks to which he went and hit his head. 😆😆😆

“yahi toh iski best feature hai.” chance maar raha hai billllllu. 😏😏😏

“aaraaam se le jaana, lambe raaste se. koi romantic gaana nahi hai tumhare paas? O JAANA suna hai?” 

lolololololol this idiot 😂😂😂😂

ouff tejLana nonsense. fwding. where my rikara babiessss? 😩😩😩

here they are!!!!! 😊😊😊

this set looks familiarrrrrr? was it used in the bareilly track? 🤔🤔🤔

something’s shady about this guyyyyy who’s the caretaker. he might try to loot them too. 😐😐😐

awwww, he’s giving her his handkerchieffffff. 😘😘😘

who stole the murtis????? 😯😯😯

yup. this fucker with ALL TEH GOLD on him (more gold than anika at her wedding with vikram even) def. has something to do with its disappearance. 😤😤😤

oh thank god, om at least listened to her and believes her without awaiiii ka misunderstanding and drama. 🙄🙄🙄

ouff such long tejLana scenes.

omkara’s interrogation koi rang nahi laa rahi, toh dabanngggg gauri utar rahi hai maidaan mein. 😎😎😎

LMAO LOOK HOW TINY SHE IS OMG I WANNA PUT HER IN MY POCKET AND CARRY HER AROUNDDDDDD😱😱😱😊😊😊😘😘😘

time for her lame candy trick. 🙄🙄🙄

hahaha, om’s face. 😆😆😆

oufffff what even is going on with tejLana??? ouff i have to go read the written update now. 😒😒😒

eeeeeeeeee. how impressed he looks. my babies! 😊😊😊😘😘😘

[boleynns]

LOOSE ENDS, ASSHOLES.

I wrote this 3 days ago, because I just KNEW they were going to fuck it all up.

^PHOTO OF A LIAR, for reference. LONG list of pissed off thoughts below.

ON YOUR WATCH.

That Molly scene in TFP was so horrendous. I don’t even ship them at all, but really. How much of an asshole do you have to be???

How did John and Sherlock survive a bomb by jumping through glass windows and landing 2 stories down on the concrete with no injuries?

How did they get on that boat?

WHY were they on that boat?

WTF was that imaginary plane bullshit???

NO ONE CARES THAT THE DOG ISNT REAL, ARE YOU KIDDING ME

Why did Mary think John would pull away from Sherlock if she died, if she didn’t know she was going to die saving Sherlock? If she’d died ANY other way, John would have no reason to pull away.

Why did Mary give Sherlock the 10000% worst advice in the world (seriously, who tf tells their “friend”, who is a DRUG ADDICT, “GO FUCK YOURSELF on drugs, and GO DIE on purpose” on the random ass off chance that John would find this out in time???)?

Why did Mary have a slip of paper to knock Sherlock out prepared ahead of time?

Why did Mary tell Sherlock and John that “A.G.R.A.” was her initials, when if they had just looked at the fucking drive they would see her real name?

Why was she SOOOOO worried that Sherlock and John would look at the drive, if all that was on there were A.G.R.A.’s identities???

Why did Mary shoot Sherlock directly in the chest point blank, which did kill him enough that the doctors GAVE UP, if she wasn’t trying to fucking kill him dead forever?

Why would Mary not recognize Vivian (or at least, her voice) if A.G.R.A. worked with her?

If Mycroft dealt with freelancers, why did he not know Mary wasn’t fucking MARY???

Why would Mary name her daughter after an alias that could get said daughter KILLED??? AND WE FUCKING KNOW THAT NAME WAS DANGEROUS, BECAUSE MARY LEFT IT BEHIND TO BECOME “MARY MORSTAN” YOU IDIOTS

What did John’s letter to Sherlock say? If is wasn’t going to be addressed, why the fuck would you put it in the episode??

Why did Molly deliver such a hard “John would rather have anyone but you. Anyone” message if it had NO POINT.

Where did the baby go when everyone the baby knew was at John’s “Therapist’s” office at the beginning of TLD? And don’t give me that “it was with friendS” crap, literally only Sherlock, Molly, and Mrs. Hudson went to that kid’s babyshower for fuck sake, John has no other friends.

If you can’t handle the placement of a baby for ONE EPISODE, don’t write one into your show FOR LITERALLY NO REASON.

What was Sherlock’s reoccurring dream that he was telling Ella? Why put that in if it wasn’t important?

If Mary isn’t bad, and therefore wasn’t working with “Faith” and Culverton to set Sherlock up to die (which would have been a perfect and interesting conspiracy), HOW did “Faith” and Culverton know Sherlock would be drugged up enough to fall into their trap??

WTF was the POINT of Eurus texting with John IF SHE WASNT WORKING WITH MARY to mess with Him and Sherlock? Literally ZERO point to the “plot”.

Also, we see that John and Eurus see eachother for a 2nd time at the bus stop. I thought it was important, even though y’all acted like all they did was text, BUT NOPE just another loose end.

TD-12 was absolutely useless, and you spent SO MUCH time on it. 

why did mary keep repeating villain lines (“Miss me?” multiple times, “Anyone!” multiple times in her video, literally fuck off)

If mary had time to jump 5 feet to take a bullet after its already been shot than sherlock had time to jump out of the way you idiots

also the irony of your holier-than-thou deduction sequence when Sherlock got shot, about how big spurts of dramatic blood only happens in movies? You literally fucked yourself.

zero point to Sherlock and John’s extended “ROMANTIC LOVE WILL COMPLETE YOUUUUU” scene on every level, went no where

speaking of that scene, how did Sherlock hear “Mary” say that he should wear the hat???? HUH>?

Mrs. Hudson WATCHED Mary’’s DVD with sherlock, why was she all “OH, wonder what this is, what could it be, WOW LOOK JOHN its your wife???” later with John and Mycroft WHEN SHE KNEW SHERLOCK WAS PROBABLY DYING

Also why would she just let John watch that cold, knowing Mary’s face would show up??

Why did you make Irene a lesbian if you were going to keep making her ride Sherlock’s dick via text message AGAIN.

I’m sure she would want to tell you this if she was here, so I’ll relay the message: LITERALLY GO FUCK YOURSELVES, YOU “SHERLOCK CAN TURN A LESBIAN WOMAN STRAIGHT, HES JUST THAT AMAZING, NO HOMO!!!” ASSHOLES

why was John still crying about his no homo bro being dead after two years, no offense to my best friend but I will think of you really fondly but probably not be going to therapy forever and being all “I literally am so heartbroken that i cant even say the things that i wanted to say to him when he was alive”

speaking of that thing that he couldn’t say out loud to Ella the Therapist: i guess he just really wanted to tell sherlock “No homo tho”, just to make sure he knew that before he died

speaking of things unsaid - I guess the serious thing that sherlock was going to say to john on the tarmac, that he chose not to say for absolutely no decernable reason, was “Bro, I’m gonna miss you, bro! We had some good bro times bro, NO HOMO!!1!” and then they do that back-slap hug that guys do so things don't get too homo

no offense to the prop department, but that light-up skull, that would be either lit or not lit or COMPLETELY BLACK, was bullshit

speaking of bullshit: kindly shove all of those elephants up your ass

including that Take-Out menu on Mycroft’s fridge. I hope you get a paper-cut that never heals.

i might as well have not even bothered taking notes on these episodes, when I could have literally never watched the show before, not cared at all, and been totally fulfilled by everything by not giving a shit about details and character arcs and, you know, literally all of ACD’s original works.

OMG SHERLOCK HAS A SISTER, I don’t fucking care.

AW POOR MARY, John and her were clearly soooo in love!! - says a person who thinks couples that don’t want to be together even a little are super romantic

literally he was trying to leave his marriage like a month after it started, literally go fuck yourself

Your show made less sense, in terms of emotion and character arcs, than Guy Ritchie’s cash grab movies. Yeah. I said it.

“Look at us both”. YEAH, LOOK AT YOURSELVES IN THE MIRROR.

oh wait i forgot, you don’t know what a mirror is. what is literature? what are emotions? idk, lets make mary gasp for breathe and say “you were my whole world!!!” to john even though that makes zero fucking sense for her character or their relationship at all and does huge disservice to them both LOL

Mary could have been the most Awesome Badass Mastermind EVER but you fucked her

An Emotional Arc: Its this thing where characters (who, like people) have emotions (CRAZZY i know), and they start in one place emotionally, and end somewhere new through the story! Lets see:

Sherlock: Starts as a suave, kinda swashbuckling guy who tries to tidy up his apartment for John, asks him to dinner, and basically blushes at John’s attention. In the middle: a bit of an asshole, but one who literally tries to die for John over and over, and literally COMES BACK TO LIFE from a FATAL gunshot bc his subconsious doesn’t want to leave John with Mary. End? “Sometimes I text Irene, just like you text your side-chick! No Homo For Life, RIGHT??? Don’t think about how every action I take is to keep you safe or happy, lol”

John: Starts as an emotionally repressed, suicidal, PTSD stricken loner who is immediately enamored with Sherlock’s brain, and literally kills a man like 1 day after they meet. Middle: A bit of an asshole who is horrible at understanding that Sherlock is NOT a robot without feelings - but an asshole who is willing to die for him, and with him, but who has major trust issues. End? “I wish I had REALLY cheated on Mary with Bus Girl, I can’t believe I missed my chance! Also, even though I’m reacting extremely jealously to you texting Irene, I think you should hit that! Now hold me while I cry, and then lets get cake while my baby cries on the floor like a Sim somewhere NO HOMEO”

I will never let you forget this.

Congrats actually, you HAVE made history! You’ve made a Historically Huge Fuck Up.

Your show’s depth is thinner than Donald Trump’s skin.

200+ adaptations of Sherlock Holmes, no courage present - oh, except for that one parody “Oklahomo” one (thanks for including Sherlock tweeting an “Oklahoma!” reference also! if I had balls, that would’ve been a kick to them!).

LOL Sherlock and John - literally so hilarious!! All those people whining “They’re Not GAY that gross, Doyle would be rolling in his grave if he found out people thought that!” and “NO! SHERLOCK IS AN EMOTIONLESS ROBOT except he can fuck irene I'm okay with that for some reason”? They were all right! What a fucking joke.

I guess “Could he daily feel a stab of hunger for you, and find nourishment at the very sight of you? Yes [he’s in love with you]. But do you ache for him?” meant nothing—OH WAIT that’s from a show that actually textually acknowledged the feelings of love between it’s two main characters. And they didn’t even say “No homo!” afterwards?? I can’t believe it.

don’t ever ask your audience to pay attention on a subtextual level again. clearly, you can’t handle it.

also: I honestly couldn’t give a shit about your endless and constant derision and annoyance with people asking about the relationship between the MAIN CHARACtTERS OF YOUR FUCKING SHOW get over yourselves, and i really hope somehow ACD comes back as a ghost to haunt you one christmas, just to tell you straightt to your stupid faces that you fucked up, and how sad he is that it will always be 1895 - because nothing ever changes, and they will be stuck there forever, out of time.

how dare you bring Oscar Wilde and Freddie Mercury into this mess.

Your intentions don’t matter - what matters is that I would have been better off not paying attention to literally ANY details, not caring one ounce about the characters, and just tuning in as a completely casual viewer. 

The real lesson was “Caring is not an advantage.”, and that is sad.

And the real Final Problem? “It’s not about the characters, its about some stupid ass dog and a stupid ass ‘Saw’ house, and who gives a shit about the rest.

Congratulations - I no longer care!

[xomaleriestar]

Collection of notes

17.02.2021 at 10:02

so what i wanted to say before initially

is that i read the letter

and was wondering if its still relevant

ok so my response letter its so in heat of the moment and gross but whatever. i wanna share before ur travels and not think about it

i think i have feelings for you too big time but im hella damaged and have big problems w trust so its hard to accept any thoughts of them. i literally cant stop thinking about u and it burns in my chest when i do

its recent, like 2 weeks. always thought im totally tripping out and were totally chill but like bro when i went to take that covid test the other day thats when i realised that it might be a fucking problem cuz i literally felt empty inside w out u and im soso scared sooooo scared of being ok with "feelings" and its really goddamn hard to talk about them as well for me but lets see what happens in the next month

slight overview of damage: the more i open up the more distant i get usually. i've always felt im not worthy of anything good in life and im rotten throughout and its my "destiny" to lean how to give myself away to """"god"""" and reach enlightenment through my own methods

i think all comes from my relationship with my mom which i need to fix before being capable of love cuz ive felt my whole life like i have no idea what it is as i think my mother does not know either. so its been my plan all along to try and learn to love my mother on this trip and forgive her (my whole life i ive been dealing with trauma from my dad so new level now spiritually)

it completely quiet in estonia so my mind is racing but whatever

our souls are connected forever and i feel a very strong connection to u and ur very good to me or just are good

18.02.2021 at 08:15

i love you so fucking much. everytime i look at you or think of you i feel blessed. writing these letters im not sure you even exist anymore. (having flashbacks of i love dick :D)

and i relate with everything you've said

i'm honestly very very very confused as well with these things so don't be scared to move at your own pace and trust yourself first..? there's nothing to prove and we both are free and i dont need you to give me anything you dont want to. everything

at the right place right time. i feel lucky?

on the topic of trust... you are the first person in my life i've connected with only based on my gut feeling. i overthink a lot, but with you i havent had the need to. in the past i would change a lot for a person, but with you i've only gone deeper within and it's gotten me to a point where i have you and for the first time i feel ready and i dont want to distance myself to avoid getting hurt and im totally okay with being completely honest with you. the feeling of trust came very naturally but it's still scary. usually i search for understanding and i always feel i never get it but with you its so different, i dont think about it. i've never actually realised before now that it's trust i've struggled with and it makes sense with every part of my life. trusting myself with my art, trusting others with myself. again, coming back to my upbringing-it defo makes sense cuz i've never trusted my mother

it's defo a strange point in our timeline but im glad we've talked about these things and opened up more

please have a safe flight, i cant wait u to be in nyc already and defo call me i miss u so

15.03.2021 at 01:00

i just remembered that i almost gave away my room away in july and cuz i was so depressed wanted to stay in estonia. found a new person but she literally cancelled like a week before i came back to uk and my init

2:42 am

literally i cant sleep and am spiralling so hard. yesterday i found this voice memo from my dads bday in the summer where my mom got super depressive/manic and is crying and im talking with her and i cant get the fucking sounds out of my head and honestly im shocked i even recorded it. my whole childhood was literally spent by her facing the window in our kitchen, not showing her face and crying and later locking herself up in the bathroom and i literally got the whole thing recorded and its so painful to listen

ugh i cant fall back asleep, spiralling so hard. yesterday i found this crazy voice memo from summer, dads bday where my mom got super manic and i had recorded it and found it yesterday. listened to the whole thing a couple times and now its stuck in my head like some random song. i'll play it to u one day, it's literally my 9-18yrs explained in that recording. my thoughts are rapidly shifting between that voice memo and you, i literally spent the whole day thinking about you.

i once dreamt that i needed to speak to my mother, grabbed her by her shoulder to turn around to see her face but she kept turning around and had no face, only hair. i never saw her face and this one time when i was stoned, i was trying to remember her face and couldnt. now realising that maybe it was because of these moments

19.03.2021 at 10:42

i love you so fucking much i love you i love you i love you so mich i love you i love you i love u love u i love you i love you i love you so much i love you so much im in love woth you i miss you im in love with you im in love with you l love you i love you im in love with you im in love with you i love you i love you im in love im in love love i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you so i love you so i love you so much i love you so much i love you i love you i think i really love you i love you so much its hard to breathe and i think i really love you and it feels great to really say it to you

20.03.2021 at 17:12

love u so fucking much coumba honestly i hope youll have an amazing day. im gonna go offline for a bit 

had a really strange dream, really mundane. took the metro home from some festival and was living in my grandmas apartment again and elevator was broken so had to take the stairs. but it was super slow and dramatic. on my way up (the apt is on 6th floor) i over heard my neighbour family fight and i left the door open to overhear what the topic was and they were yelling at their child? 

i crave physical touch

hey hope ur being productive!! goddamn, ive just been writing and reading the whole day and figuring out this creative block situation/ why am i so triggered by work. found the right stuff to read and feeling full of life again. hope u are too

hope you're not second guessing me for getting sad yesterday. im feeling fucking crazy and it might be cause im starting my period. i keep rereading your letter. 

26.03.2021 at 19:21

bless you

ur so nice to me

had a walk and it was really refreshing. feeling better but have so many anxieties that sometimes i just explode

i fucking love u too. sometimes its like ur my lifes worth of care i never 

sometimes i feel like my lifes worth of good is coming to my life through you

......ur so nice to me....honestly i love u too so much..... i think it might be bc of full moon but im just like a total wreck today :D thanks for hearing me out before. and yes i'm excited to see whats waiting for me in london!! 

in other news -.... called me rude and an egomaniac bc i told her i was depressed and feeling xtremely anxious blabla basically overview of what i told u today so will postpone thinking about countryside stuff. feeling like shit again lolzzzzzz bc of it.... we were supposed to go together with misha but misha cancelled right so im not really in a hurry which she knew and wished me a happy trip back to london. like whenever she doesnt get what she wants she goes off but i mean i do understand that im being an asshole as well so its like the perfect way to end this day

baah mh im just gonna rant here u dont even have to respond :D but i used to be really really selfless growing up and my parents always bring it up that i let my friends use me lol and ive been hella defensive abt it always bc i never knew how intense it was?. friends literally always came first and i kinda repressed my true self bc of embarrassment etc etc and two years ago it slowly started morphing into hurt and disappointment idk why i expected sth back (now i dont thats prolly why im super self centred and delusional as well i guess) so like after all this shit when im like yo having a hard time i get called a fucking egomaniac... i think im tired and honestly the fact that im getting along w evert so well makes me so happy but yeah since eliann is horrible at expressing emotions its harder 

31.03.2021 at 20:20

❣️ is for  🚬👄👗COOL🕶☕️🏙❣️

❣️ is for 🎀🎀🎀ORIGINAL 🎀🎀❣️

❣️ is for ⭐️Ur A Star ⭐️ ❣️

❣️ is for MUSIC 🎧🔊🎶❣️

❣️ is for 🦋🦋 BEAUTIFUL 🦋🦋❣️

❣️ is for 💫💐🧚‍♀️ANGELIC 🏵🖼🔮❣️

❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️

02.04.2021 at 14:24

miiisssssssss uuuuuuu sooooo muuuccchhhh aaaannndddd caaannnnoooottttt wwwaaaaaiiiitttt toooo seeeeee uuuuuuu aaallllrrreeeaaaddddyyyyy iiimmmm sssoooop eeexxxccciiittteeeeddddd ffffoooorrrrr iiiittttt

11.04.2021 at 12:54

i really reaally love you

13.04.2021 at 21:53

have said this before but im drunk AGAIN and will say this AGAIN that i think ur amazing 

14.02.2021 at 01:46

im in love w u

[fugoffbitchdarnit]

february 13 2018 ; consistent thoughts from today

today i kept thinking about a lot of the same things; an old friend-ish, anxiety, presence, and some other things i cant remember now cuz im thinking too much about this digital diary!

ok so, my old friend-ish. i add the ish because she (max*) she was never fully my friend i would just see her around for a while time in my life/whereas an ordinary old friend is just my old actual genuine friend that is not anymore. i still follow her on instagram. so max and her best friend *zoe have been excessively best friends the whole time i knew them. when i say this i mean they would always post bff pix all the time and just really put it out there about their awesome friendship. i hope im getting this point accross. you know those friends that are always posting pix together and are like “me and my bitch” or “when u both wear ur red boots” or “i mis u so much wtf y has it only been 13 hours” ???? recently from the internet i noticed zoe started dating a girl and was with her more than max. and maxs post were more lonely. then 2 days ago i saw posts that zoe and her gf got married! i was thinking a lot about max and how she kinda doesnt have her best friend anymore. i dont even know how i think so much about this. its just instagram u know? so weird how it takes affect on me and just my personal thoughts and going into what i think about other peoples personal thoughts. wow i thought writing about this would be a lot easier but i guess im just not a very good writer yet! my writing is just like little txts message blurbs all combined in one. so yeah moral of the story.... i never even liked max that much, she always kinda bugged me! even the bff posts were cringe to me,. but now this marriage just outta the blue (to me) makes me think aw for her. she just kinda lost her best friend is what i think. poor lil baby

ok to jump into my bff, hes a boy and we fuck all the time and we can never actually date, we’ve tried and it just gets weird, we know each other so well its just meant to be. i hate marriage but i will probably marry him hahaha. super weird. his name is ernie*. ok so he’s always been the happiest guy ever but lately since ive grown and learned more about depression n shit like that i know that its way more common than anyone thinks....ofcourse. sooooo hes the kind of guy that can be very good at staying present without even knowing thats what he’s doing. he also will just repress shit because thats super easy for anyone to do. so when it comes out its in weird twitches that happens in sudden quick times. now he’s been getting anxiety and its like hahathats just ur anxiety bro!! why am i writing this!? i dont know. jk i do know and i know that i say “i dont know” when im thinking im stupid for doing/saying something so i just say that. i am doing this because i want to get good at writing in a diary again and it feels good and almost productive doing this. i’ll get good! for now these are not read by anyone, maybe one day it’ll turn into a movie!! hahahaha

i forgot all my good points that i thought i would write about today. goodnight.

88******stars on names because they have been changed to keep my digial diary anonymous and to protect myself and the people i write about*****

just remembered that i was gonna write about my scratcher winnings today! ernie bought me a 1$ scratcher and i won $2. then i got a $2 dollar scratcher and won $5 then got a 5$ scratcher and won $10 then got 2 five dollar scratchers then lost one of them but won another $10! then lost and bought another 2 dollar scratcher. then won $2 dollars on that! so played it again and got another 2 dollar scratcher then won another ticket, then lost. the end ! oh happy day! good classic night w ernie.