#like physically mentally emotionally nope!!!

[silenthillbunni]

my body rlly hates me omg

[cornflowercanine]

love is crazy it will literally make you listen to hurricane and molasses the hush sound and if you were to ever get lyrics tattooed on your 8ody itd 8e from either of those songs and it will make you wear a ring and it will make you want to cry that your ring is just a flimsy itty 8itty ru88er 8and in hiser favor8 color and so you pick through all your rings that are supposed to 8e yours and ask pick one. and wear it every single day only taking it off when washing your hair (it snags otherwise) and it will make you wring your own hands and it will make you understand long-term rel8ionships and committed rel8ionships and wanting them in the first place and f33ling 8etter 8c of them and monogamy and only liking one person and not 8eing interested in anyone else and getting angry when other ppl like you like that and snappy when they try to get with you like that and it will make you understand wedding dresses and happily ever after and it will make you walk outside in the sun and take a d33p 8reath and realize holy shit, you're here. you're here in the same world as xr. you made it this far. it's not like everything else didn't exist 8efore you talked 8ut now it's like, oh my god, everything fits now, everything makes sense now. and it has made me write and it has made me make poetry and it has made me want to share it to desper8ly get ppl to understand this thing that has taken over my life (falling in love) AND IT'S MADE THEM WANT TO START WRITING TOO? and. i could go on

[the-faceless-bride]

can i have yandere clawd and deuce poly 😪 iltsm( i love yr writing ur one of my fav writers btw 💞)

Omg. I love both of them so much. 🥩🐍 Bluckle the FUCK up, it's a long one. I love them so much. I gave each their own section as to how this started, then the poly together. If you want more of them... Please... Please ask me. P.s. sorry about all the monster puns, I couldn't help myself

🌕New Ghoul in School🐍

Warnings: OOC Clawd, OOC Duce, OOC Cleo?, OOC Draculaura? Clawd being a kicked puppy, yandere content, controlling behavior, turning to stone, non-con hugging, cuddling and Kisses, forced closeness, UNHEALTHY BEHAVIOR!, accusations of cheating, emotional cheating?

Characters : Clawd × Reader × Duce

Proof read : nope

Requested?: yes

You had just transferred from your normie school, Turns out people are so accepting of finding out you're a monster. So you transferred to Monster High, and being a new ghoul didn't seem so hard until you tripped an orange werecats tail and she picked a fight with you...

"and just Who, do you think you are? I don't know how you are your Normie friends play, but you don't want to mess with me Ghoul. I'll make you sorry-"

"why don't you go and pick on someone your own size Torilie?"

"yeah, Dude. Not cool."

🐾🐍 • and that's how it started. Just two Mansters defending the New Ghoul. They knew Torilie was one to pick fights and figured they would help you stay out of trouble for the time being. And the three of you became three peas in a pod. And while you all thought it was great, their Ghoulfriends... Had other ideas.

🐍🕶️ • Cleo started having problems as soon as you had arrived. Your first day she already knew who you were, what you were, where you came from, and if you were cool enough to be popular and associate with the Ghouls she does. And she deemed you not worthy. And that was putting a strain on your friendship.

🐍🕶️ • Duce was grown increasingly tired and frustrated. He loved Cleo, he did. But she could be... Emotionally, physically, and mentally exhausting. When they go out he has to change his personality to not embarrass her, she dictates who can can hang out with and when, and he has to constantly hear from her that he should be doing as she asks and says and do it happily as she goes against what her family wants to be with him. He doesn't want to do that anymore. He wants to be able to Shoot Hoops with Clawd, sit with Jackson at lunch, and talk about the Hissstory test. Listen to whatever playlist Holt made or play dodgeball with Slow Mo. Without Cleo saying when he can and can't.

But he just can't leave her. He's become so dependent on her. Hell, the last time She went to Scarise without him, he nearly went crazy as he didn't know what to do. He couldn't leave Cleo. Even if he wanted to... Unless. Maybe he didn't need to be dependent on her. Maybe. He could be dependent on you.

🐍🕶️ • Duce began to test the waters, which was the start of his obsession. For example at lunch when Cleo tells him to get the green eyed Salad and a water, he'll then turn around and ask you... Sometimes when you feel the burn of Cleo's raging stare you won't respond or say the same as Cleo, but on the days you don't pay attention or to stressed to care you recommend the meat plant sandwich and the yummy razzberry soda pop you've been drinking the past few days. And he'll pick your recommendation. And it Infuriates Cleo. He likes that with you, he has a choice, where Cleo demands and tells. You offer and recommend.

🐍🕶️ • this intimately ends in an explosive argument that Spectra has a field day covering. And Duce does something, not him. Her. Or anyone else in the school say coming. "I'm breaking up with you Cleo." a long still silence fills the halls as everyone takes a moment to process what he just said. Before Cleo screams and storms away, and Duce... Doesn't feel as heartbroken as he thought he should.

🐍🕶️ • Duce starts spending most if not all his free time with you and Clawd, well. Mostly you as Clawd gets called from Draculaura a lot. And while he's sad he can't spend more time with Clawd he's happy to spend time with you. You help groom his snakes, you help him pick which sunglasses he should wear each day, (even though they are all just different shades of red) as well as his many band sweaters. Rumors spread like wildfire, especially with Spectra's gossip site.

"Duce trades princess for new Ghoul?! Stay tuned for the possible new hot relationship??"

🐾🌕 • when Clawd first met you he thought you were great! He got a new friend to hang out with! Sure Manny, Heath, Gill, and Duce we're cool but Clawd has a thing for fashion and self-care, that's not something he really talks about with them BUT that's OK! cuz now he can talk about it with you! He ended up spending a bit of free time with you, anytime Draculaura was out and shopping or just Fanging out with her Ghoulfriends or catching up with her Cousin, he would spend his afternoon with you. Getting his hair straightened and trimmed, getting manicures so his nails don't get too sharp and ridged. And eventually, when he's comfortable with you, he'll start playing games. Like fetch or chase. The only issue is that when Duce started to come around more and Cleo trying to keep him on a leash, slowly Draculaura started calling him and needed him more and more. He didn't think much of it, until Duce's big breakup with Cleo. A week later Draculaura wouldn't leave him alone for a second, and anytime you started approaching she took his hand and pulled him in another direction.

🐾🌕 • it started becoming draining, he loves spending time with his Ghoulfriend. He truly did. But not when every two seconds she was hinting and implying all the time he spent with you was him creeping around behind her back. Nothing he did or said made her change her mind, now everything he did seemed to set her off. She was so paranoid, that he went out of his way to make her a gift to show that he loved her, but he accidentally made it worse, he had to try and hold back tears and puppy cries as she said, "Bad Clawd!" over and over while tugging his ear. He doesn't understand what he did wrong, he just made a new friend. You nor him did anything. So why was she being like this?

Any attempts to talk about it were shut down, as she tried keeping him away from you. And he just couldn't take it anymore, he liked being clingy but he was clingy because he genuinely wanted to be around his partner not just sticking to them like glue-watching like a hawk to 'catch them in the act'. He would go as far as to say this was worse than the time he was dumped for Valentine the love manipulator.

🐾🌕 • Clawd began to confide in you, Draculaura wouldn't listen to him so he was happy you did. He spent hours just sitting under a tree at the back of the school with you, drawing doodles in the dirt, ears tucked back to his head as he vented about his feelings and how the recent arguments had affected him, you tried to help every time. But eventually, word got to Draculaura about your little meetings, and stormed over one day with her ghoulfriends in toe.

Both you and Clawd had to endure the burning glare of the Ghouls, Draculaura ranting and raving and ultimately giving him an ultimatum. You or her. And Clawd's ears pinned flat to his head, he didn't want to lose his Ghoulfriend but he didn't want to lose you either. But before he could answer Draculaura said something that gave him the push to his ultimate answer. "ugh, I should've known! A guy hangs out with other guys like him! And Duce is a lying, dirty, cheater and so are you! And this new Ghoul sure has some nerve to go around sneaking with other Mansters knowing they are dating someone! If that's the kind of Manster you are Clawd then maybe... Eh *hick* MaYbe we shouldn't Be togEther!" a moment passes where Clawd looks down into Draculaura's wet violet eyes, sighs, then answers. "maybe we shouldn't." the ghoul's Gasp and Draculaura sobs, "FINE! WE ARE OVER!"

🐾🌕 • Clawd thought relieved he wouldn't be interrogated every day and being told he's bad, he's still heartbroken that the Ghoul he thought he'd spend his life with was gone. He clung to you and Duce for security and long talks to make him feel better and eventually, he did. Clawd was back to his peppy, wide-eyed, excitable self again. In fact, he's the happiest he's been. His mood wasn't Even shaken when he found out Draculaura had begun dating his sister, he just didn't care. He was happy.

🐾🌕 • It wasn't until a late-night Chat; that you and Clawd had stayed over at Duce's house after seeing a new skinwalker Scareitage Boovie that Clawd discovered that not only He had feelings for you but so did Duce... And well, he had always liked Duce maybe even more than just a bro, but this changed everything. And they agreed. A scarily wonderful idea...

"Vampy puts doggy out for good? Or does Doggy like the Dog house with his chew toy?"

🐍🐾 • now Duce and Clawd are softer yandere's than the normal. But that doesn't mean they won't use force if they need to. Duce is a Dependant, laid-back, stalker-type yandere. He's ok with letting you have wiggle room as long as he knows where you are at all times and can get to you in a short period. Whereas Clawd is a Clingy, overprotective, worshiper-type Yandere. Clawd wants to be near you all the time if you let him, but he's ok with letting you go for a while as long as he has Duce he always knows where you are because Duce knows, if at any point Duce doesn't know for some reason or he's not around Duce to find out, he'll use his nose to track you down.

🐍🐾 • You probably wouldn't know they are yandere's unless you start trying to spend more time with others that aren't them. The more you try and hang out with Operetta and Cupid they start to get a little more aggressive and demanding of your time and attention. Which can trigger some alarm bells that something isn't right. The best thing would be to try and talk and compromise they are willing to do that as long as you promise to let them keep tabs "for safety reasons," and you spend time with them immediately after.

🐍🐾 • after a month or two they start to be more openly affectionate and act like a Throuple, it went over your head at first with Duce's laid-back attitude and Clawd's over-excitable personality being normal, but the more Clawd wanted to play fetch and hug you, and Duce constantly being around you despite having the freedom to hang out with his other dudes you start to get the idea they might be romantically interested.

🐍🐾 • You opened to the idea, and the relationship seemed to be working well... Until they started to become, overwhelming. Clawd always over your shoulder, Duce always seeming to know where you are... Even when you didn't tell him where you were. And things took a turn when you tried to tell them you needed space. "You're... Breaking up... With us?" you sputtered, you definitely didn't answer and deny fast enough as you felt your body start to stiffen and cold. Duce had turned you to stone. Clawd whimpered while holding your cold stiff stone body, "im sorry sweetheart. But we can't have you running from us. Just be good ok? Please?" after that you'd been chained to them by that point. Nobody would've believed you if you told them the school's Cool guy and oversized puppy were forcing you into a relationship...

🐍🐾 • they aren't too harsh on punishments. For the most part. Once you tried to run away once, you waited for a moment to be alone before printing off trying to get somewhere, anywhere but there. But you forgot who you were dealing with and Clawd chased you down. Clawd's punishments involve many forced hugs, kisses, and closeness. If he shows how much he loves you at some point you'll see it's true and love him too! Right?

Duce will turn you to stone anytime he gets an idea you're about to run off. He makes Clawd drag you to his house. Which takes a lot of manipulation and convincing. Clawd doesn't want to lock you away to be alone. He wants you to be around them! But Duce scares him into going along with it. Even sometimes provokes him to anger to be more willing to lock you in a dirty old basement.

🐍🐾 • overall. As long as you stay and promise to love them, and don't mind clinginess it's a cute relationship... But if you reject them, you'll spend a lot of time in an old basement in Duce's home, alive but unable to move. To feel. Or scream.

[writerquil]

Spoilers!

TW! A rant. Mentions of S@ and Abuse

AHEM! Alastor apologist (and apparently now partial defender) to the rescue!

This post is for anyone switching up on my guy after the newest episode. And the switch up originates from that one scene, you know, the scene below.

(EDIT: Sorry for the random censoring lol, I don't feel like going back to edit it and its an old habit of mine).

Yeah, we all know this scene. Basically the one where Alastor lashes out at Husk.

Immediately after seeing this scene I had TWO different reactions, in which consisted of “wow that was cool” and “people are going to twist this, aren’t they?”

And people did! So here I am!

I’m basically going to show a bunch of reactions and concerns to said scene that I disagree with and then I’ll say why!

1. “Alastor is like Valentino!”

Don’t even say that. PLEASE NO.

I like to think that I’m pretty good at letting my liking for characters go the moment that I realize they’re wretched in specific ways, but this never occurred for Alastor.

You wanna know why? Because he is NOTHING like Valentino apart from the fact that they’re both overlords who carry soul contracts. I don’t think I really need to pick apart their personalities because we can already tell how different they are.

The only reason why the two were “grouped” together was because Husk and Angel were stuck in situations both caused by soul contracts and an overlord which caused the two to be mentioned alongside each other.

2. “Husk’s relationship to Alastor is EXACTLY the same as Angel and Valentino’s!”

Nope. Both relationships, admittedly suck, trust me, I’m not discounting either relationship or saying “ok well one has it worse than the other”.

But come on guys, the relationships are not the same. Alastor sucks to Husk, obviously, considering he is forced to do his bidding for who knows how long? But there’s obviously a fine line between the two relationships.

There’s parallels of course, with the chains and the soul dealing. The situations aren’t completely the same but they have similar sources so parallels are bound to occur.

Valentino is an abusive ass whom frequently physically and emotionally abused Angel and Alastor (from what we’ve all seen) can be a jerk who drags Husk into clearly many “favours” such as working at the hotel and possibly many more considering he’s clearly met more of Alastor’s colleagues and friends before.

They’re both forced into things and with their souls under contract, they can’t do much about it. But the things they’re forced to do are significantly different. Once again, this isn’t me saying anyone has it better, because it’s not a competition.

But the relationships are not the same. The two are brought in for significantly different things. Do you really think Alastor is s3Xua!!y abusing Husk whenever he’s brought in? Yeah, no, me neither.

Do you think he’s mentally abusing him too, or that a situation like what was displayed occurs often whenever Husk does come in? Because no. Didn’t you see how startled Husk was? This clearly wasn’t just an average event that happened between the two frequently and the fact that Husk was willing to push Alastor’s buttons a bunch in the first place just shows that he wasn’t expecting it to happen either.

And for the people so insistent on Alastor abusing him like that. I suggest you hide your weird k!nks better.

3. “Alastor tortures Husk frequently!”

Okay and what gave you that idea? Was it the way that Alastor lashed out? Because he didn’t lash out of the blue as you may think.

Husk pushed his buttons and Alastor got angry. Trust me, I love Husk but he played a stupid game and got surprised when he won a stupid prize.

Considering Alastor abusive after pulling Husk to the floor is strange. Trust me, if he was supposed to be abusive, it would be explicitly showed throughout the episodes. And before you say “well it was implied”, I really don’t think so.

And once again, Husk was clearly extremely startled, which means this probably doesn’t happen very often. Which also discounts you all considering him to be similar to Valentino, who displayed hurting behaviour frequently.

Like the most we’d even seen interaction between the two was in the pilot and the recent episode. I think we’d get more display if there was more violence occurring in the relationship.

4. “I used to like Alastor before…”

Then what? You realized he was evil and did evil things? YEAH, he’s bound to threaten someone here and there.

Like if you don’t like him after witnessing his literal evilness then sorry to say, you never liked him in the first place.

I’m sorry for this guys but seriously. You can’t switch up on an evil character for doing evil things. He’s going to threaten people. Just know that when he does, it doesn’t signify he’s abusive or assaults Husk on a daily basis.

[woodlaflababab]

Aang, Psychology, and the Concept of “Running Away” (A Breakdown Of Aang's Trauma Responses)

So, one thing that always kind of threw me off about atla was Aang's ignoration and dismissiveness of the things that have happened to him and continue to happen to him. He never seemed to have any kind of trauma response (besides nightmares).

Recently I've realized that the ignoration is Aang's trauma response, and it runs pretty fucking deep. Aang shows a lot of trauma responses but they are not as noticeable because Aang is also ridiculously good at emotional regulation, to a toxic point imo, and probably due to his upbringing by monks.

Aang, as is pretty well covered by the show, has a problem with trying to 'run away’ from his problems. This steadily stops happening as much throughout Book 2 (though he is learning in Book 1), but what's interesting is, while his tendency to physically run away from problems ends, his tendency to emotionally run away increases.

We go from Book 1 in which Aang confides in Katara about the separation from the monks, to Book 2 in which Aang literally actively rejects attempts at comfort in favor of an emotional shut down, to Book 3 where, after the failed invasion, Aang immediately tries just about anything he can to avoid talking about it.

He's not necessarily 'running away’. He still owns up to his duty and is right on the ball when Zuko shows up to teach firebending. It is not the work he shies from, it is specifically talking about the failure. This is Aang's main trauma response. Before I delve deeper into that though, I want to talk about Aang's other trauma responses that get bypassed thanks to his ability to ignore them.

Quoting ‘What is Child Traumatic Stress’, “Traumatic reactions can include a variety of responses, including intense and ongoing emotional upset, depressive symptoms, anxiety, behavioral changes, difficulties with attention, academic difficulties, nightmares, physical symptoms such as difficulty sleeping and eating, and aches and pains, among others.”

Aang shows almost all of these at one point or another, and typically they show themselves when he finds himself incapable of mentally 'running away.’

Intense and Ongoing Emotional Upset: 

I'm mostly eyeing the avatar state episodes. His immediate reaction to traumatic events he is helpless to is explosive anger, but it fails to be ongoing because it is immediately followed by a shut down. 

- Aang on Zuko's boat. In this episode, while fighting with Zuko, Aang shows some pretty intense fear and his first (technically second) experience with the Avatar state is for survival and driven by fear (also, notably, a repeat experience of the same thing that caused the actual first experience). Yet, as soon as Aang is off of Zuko's boat, he's melancholy for a hot second and then turns on a dime and starts talking about the adventures they can go on. Avatar State -> Shut Down/dismissing or ignoring the problem.

- Aang at the Southern Air Temple. He starts off in deep obvious denial, like this kid is so obviously blocking. Then he sees Gyatso's body, goes into a rage and grief induced Avatar state, gets pulled out, can no longer use denial as his mental defense, and so once again turns to shut down. He's expressionless as he comes down, and when he's fully out he's just kind of tired and speaks with a soft almost toneless quality. He's admitting to the trauma and yet there's a numb resignation to it. He's not emotionally connecting with it. We see him after with Momo and Appa smiling and just being like “we gotta stick together :)”. That's not the appropriate response to admitting there's only three survivors of your home. Avatar State -> Shut down/dismissal

- Aang and General Fong. Aang experiences an extremely distressing and helpless situation while he watches Katara, one of two whole people in his life, be buried. He goes into a rage induced Avatar state, again, and then literally 'nope's out of the situation with help from Roku. And when he comes back, he shuts down. He doesn't react emotionally, he once again speaks in that soft, even, almost dead tone, apologizes, and dismisses the event. I mean, the way he addresses General Fong, the person who just caused this whole thing, is extremely chill, almost uncharacteristic. Just a simple, “you're out of your mind” with a tone that could make you think he was having a casual conversation with someone who just suggested eating cereal out of a cup. And then he's good! Momo comes back and he smiles and everything is all good again. Avatar State -> Shut down/dismissal.

- Then we have the desert, one of the few times Aang does not shut down immediately, but then it culminates in the Avatar State and he stays like that for a bit but once he comes down, his faces changes again, to what is almost resignation, like he's given up on being mad, which really, he has as we see later. And then the next episode and he's playing in some water, but as soon as Sokka brings up Appa, we see the face and tone that's now kind of familiar: soft, dead, dismissive. He's once again refusing to emotionally connect and is downplaying it. Avatar State -> shut down/dismissal.

Depressive Symptoms/Anxiety:

He shows fits of both, though these aren't as evident because, again, most of the time he's in an emotional block and ignoring the problems. But when he cannot ignore the absence of his lifelong companion, he has a long period of anger followed by a numb depressive state, he literally talks about giving up hope. He is entirely hopeless at this point.

And then when he cannot ignore the Day of Black Sun coming in a few days, his anxiety goes through the fucking roof. 

However, these don't last long and that'll connect to me talking about emotional regulation later.

Behavioral Changes:

Aang changes A Lot over the course of the series. Book 1 Aang is very distinct from Book 3 Aang (though we still see the core traits of him throughout). He becomes more hyper focused on doing his duty, tends to fall to the background when he can, generally takes on a much more somber demeanor.

Difficulties With Attention:

This one's not really huge. He has about the same amount of attention focus in Book 3 as he does Book 1, if not improvement.

Nightmares:

I don't think I have to explain this. Aang goes through multiple fits of nightmares.

Difficulties Sleeping or Eating:

Once again, I look to Nightmares and Daydreams, one of the few times Aang is unable to shut down or block. He cannot sleep for the life of him. I have plans to go back and pay attention to eating habits in Book 3 in order to potentially add onto this joke meta, but I would not be surprised if there were signs of a lowered appetite, even if the writers did not intend it.

Aches and Pains:

He doesn't ever complain about this but also like, would he? Even if he was experiencing them? Kid tried to fight people and fly through a storm while newly recovering from a lightning injury. Aang gives no shits.

Then the article also covers childhood PTSD diagnoses which I'd also like to go over real quick. “the child continues to re-experience the event through nightmares, flashbacks, or other symptoms for more than a month after the original experience; the child has what we call avoidance or numbing symptoms—he or she won’t think about the event, has memory lapses, or maybe feels numb in connection with the events—and the child has feelings of arousal, such as increased irritability, difficulty sleeping, or others.”

Most of these I just covered, but I think it's notable that numbness is also mentioned here, the exact symptoms I've been talking about. Avoidant, won't think about it, numb in connection.

And just to be sure that everyone is on board let me go through some other examples of Aang shutting down:

Katara brings up the 100 years and Aang immediately blocks that shit. It's literally too big for him to conceptualize, so he dismisses it as okay because he has a new friend now and moves on and doesn't think about it.

The Northern Air Temple. I think most people agree that the lesson in that episode was wrong. Aang had every right to be angry. There's nothing okay about taking over and destroying 100 year old artifacts of a nearly extinct culture. We see Aang react to this with a numbness. There's even a moment where he's just frozen and uncomprehending. “This place is unbelievable.” “Yeah. It's great isn't it?” “No, just unbelievable.” He reacts with anger later (notably when he feels like he can do something instead of being helpless), and then when he can no longer do anything, he once again just rejects any negative emotional turmoil in favor of that “it's fine” attitude and accepts what the people have done.

Then the desert, one of the few places we don't see him shut down immediately. Except, literally the next episode is all about Aang's hardest shut down yet.

There are other examples but I think you get the point. He does this A Lot.

Okay cool, so we've covered the denial and trauma responses part, but how does emotional regulation play into this?

I'm glad you asked.

So, when I was first considering Aang and this whole thing, I thought Aang exhibited emotional dysregulation, especially in regards to the Avatar State, but then I actually did some learning on emotional dysregulation and realized, actually, no, he doesn't. Emotional dysregulation is mostly characterized by emotional responses being out of proportion with the event, but I think we can all agree, pm every time he goes into the Avatar State, that emotional response is uh, rather warranted. Now, Aang does, in these moments, show the lack of control that can come with emotional dysregulation, but also like, who wouldn't.

Considering Aang's behavior outside of the Avatar State Outbursts, he's actually very good at emotional regulation. Scary good, in fact. Number One in the reasons I say this is everything I said above. The ability to shut down is often an active choice. Aang does not like who he is when he is upset and, outside the initial outburst, has a pretty firm grip on his emotions. He shows anger at times, but they are in appropriate places with more or less appropriate responses. 

The Desert stands out so much because Aang loses the control he normally has. This is where we see him lose his grip on himself and he spirals.

He rarely shows grief. During his lessons with the Guru he passes all the chakras with amazing ease because he legitimately is that good at controlling and managing emotions which, like I said at the very beginning, I attribute a lot of that to him being raised by monks. I mean, he's a 12 yr old who is skilled in meditation. I don't think it's a stretch to think the monks taught him other such things.

He doesn't react to small things that would normally piss people off. Examples include The Headband when he gives absolutely zero shits about the bully, and The Southern Raiders where he accepts Katara trying to steal Appa and doesn't react to Zuko mocking him and his culture. 

Aang also, paradoxically, can be pretty good at expressing emotions when he needs to. He's typically very emotionally intelligent, with the exception being pretty much any trauma. He will react to basic things in the moment and is unafraid to show frustration or anger or uncertainty, as long as it's Not connected to a thing he is distinctly Not thinking about.

And one of the most damning examples of his emotional regulation skill, that is actually the scene that started me thinking about all of this, is the scene with Koh the Face Stealer. 

That scene threw me off so much because I felt like it was incredibly out of character for Aang, this incredibly expressive kid, to be able to show no emotional reaction. It didn't make sense and for a long time I dismissed it as just, the writers thought it'd be cool so he did it. But of course, I can't let things lay, so I never really stopped thinking about it until I realized, in context of everything I've talked about before, it actually makes perfect sense.

Aang is emotionally expressive by choice. He has the ability to control his emotions and responses to a ridiculous degree. He knows how to be emotionally intelligent with basic things, where to express emotion and how to do it. 

(Of course, he's not perfect. There are plenty of times he acts out, the Bato episode being the first thing to come to mind, but even there, after just a few hours, he has wrestled with his jealousy and responds appropriately to guilt, he owns up to it. He does try to explain himself but when Sokka makes it clear he's not going to listen, Aang does not continue to press the point. He accepts Sokka's decision, does not lash out, and for once doesn't shut down or exhibit happiness soon after. He is sad and expresses it without shoving his emotions onto others. For a 12 yr old, this is fucking impressive.)

Aang was taught well by the monks, but the one thing they couldn't teach him was response to trauma, and that's where he falters, but that emotional regulation means he's not going to respond in a typical way. Instead, he turns to denial as his coping mechanism of choice and uses those skills he learned to achieve a workable state of being but through unhealthy use.

Where am I going with this? Idk. Nowhere really, I just wanted to talk about Aang and psychology tbqh.

Anyway, I will finish this up by a fun delve into Things He's Probably Going To End Up Suffering From:

Denial can lead to memory blocking, where it's more than just not thinking about it, the brain actively suppresses and alters memory to cope. Adult Aang's recollection of the Ozai year is probably not going to be super accurate. Would not be surprised if someone was like “hey remember that time you were almost executed by a town for your past live’s mistakes?” and Aang just went “No???” and legit has no recollection of any such thing.

Selective numbing will eventually turn into collective numbing. You can selectively numb for a temporary period of time (which is how people fall into the trap) but eventually your brain will start to numb everything, not just the bad things. At the very least teenage Aang absolutely goes through a period of dissociative complete numbness.

Speaking of dissociation, if you're not going to react to trauma the normal way, dissociation happens. It starts as a coping mechanism but like with numbing, it cannot remain controlled and will develop into something. Aang will have a dissociative disorder, I'm telling you. Which one? Idk, but I assure you, it'll be there. I'm leaning toward some basic depersonalization/derealization and/or OSDD type four where trauma and meditation accidentally mix for the worse.

So yeah, there you go, a breakdown of Aang, his trauma responses, his emotional intelligence, and the consequences of those two things put together.

I'm gonna be a nerd here and add shitty citations but this is mostly in case you're also a psych geek and want to read things.

“What Are the Dissociative Disorders”. International Society for the Study of Trauma and Dissociation.

“Developmental trauma: Conceptual framework, associated risks and comorbidities, and evaluation and treatment”. National Library of Medicine.

“What is Child Traumatic Stress”. The National Child Traumatic Stress Network.

[katemartinismywife]

if you’re comfortable with it a pazzi fic where azzi surprises paige when she left for rehab and she comes back earlier than she was supposed to or literally anything pazzi and totally only if you’re comfortable writing it!

(also i didn’t say this in my last ask but your writing is literally so good babe!!💕)

☺︎ paige bueckers x azzi fudd ☺︎

Paige tore her acl a month ago and the rest of the season was up to Azzi. Paige and Azzi were secretly dating. They didn't want their relationship to overshadow their team or how hard they worked to get to where they are now.

Paige had decided for the first months of recovery that she would go back to Minnesota with her family. At first, Azzi wasn't very happy with the decision, but she knew it was best for Paige.

Paige was somewhat mentally and physically better, but emotionally she was missing her girlfriend. Paige had gotten the yes from her parents that she was able to go see Azzi.

During practice, everyone was extremely weird. Ashlynn would smirk at Azzi and then when she asked her why she was acting like that she just shrugged her shoulders. Aaliyah rushed Azzi out of the shower and into her sweats.

Nika smiled at her strangely and lead her to Ashlynn's car. "Ash is taking you home..I won't be home tonight" Nika spoke to her pushing her into the car. "You guys are weird" Azzi mumbled pulling out her phone to text Paige.

Her first notification was that Paige had stopped sharing her location. Weird.

A💗: why did you just sharing your location?

A💗: Paige??

A💗: why are my texts green?

Azzi sighed leaning her head against the window. "Have you talked to PB?" Azzi turned her head to look at a smiling Ashlynn. "Nope"

"You're lying"

"Stop talking" Ashlynn squealed trying to make sure she didn't spoil anything. The car came to a quick stop in front of Azzi and Nika's apartment. "Thanks Ash"

"Wait before you leave someone wanted me to give you these" Ashlynn smiled handing Azzi a bouquet of pink and white tulips. Azzi cooed looking at the roses. "Love you" Ashlynn yelled and pulled off.

Azzi began walking to her front door seeing it wide open with flower petals on the floor and a gift basket in the doorway. She covered her face with her hand laughing. "I love her so much" Azzi whispered picking up the gift basket full of Paige's hoodies, shorts, candles, and other small items Azzi likes.

Azzi began to hear "Never Knew I Needed" by Neyo play from her bedroom. "Paige?" Azzi cheesed following the petals on her floor. Walking into her bedroom she saw Paige on crutches holding more flowers and a small black box.

"I love you" Azzi smiled covering her face with her hands. "Come here baby" Paige spoke pulling Azzi into her for a hug. "I missed you" Paige whispered kissing the top of Azzi's head. "I got this for you" Azzi looked down at the black box and saw a necklace with a P on it.

"Don't cry baby" Paige pouted hugging her girlfriend.

"I love you so much"

☺︎ ☺︎ ☺︎ ☺︎ ☺︎ ☺︎ ☺︎

thank you soo much !!

[linahopeeeee]

Clingy

ღ Pairing: Todoroki x reader

ღ Summary: you call Shoto clingy and he shows you just how clingy he is.

ღ Words: 1500

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“fuck you take me so well” Shoto says, hands holding the back of your head as he roughly thrusts his fat cock deep into your throat, and you hum in response.

After a few seconds he pulls away and allows you to catch your breath, immediately pushing his dick past your lips again when he decides you’ve had enough time.

Your eyes are tightly shut at this point as tears stream down your cheeks, your throat is on fire and your jaw is aching, but your going to push through it if it makes your baby feel better, smiling around his dick as you think back to why he was upset in the first place.

“alright I’m leaving” you call from the bottom of the steps, your boyfriend Shoto quickly rushing down in order to give you a proper goodbye.

He pulls you in for a quick kiss, hands wrapping around your waist, pout still clearly evident on his face.

You knew he was going to be like this. For the past few days he’s been super clingy and pouty and you didn’t mind not one bit until today.

You usually love when he’s clingy because your clingy yourself but you and Ochaco had made plans to see this movie weeks ago and you weren’t going to cancel on her, but the second you bought up the fact that you had to leave to Shoto he instantly started pouting.

“but I don’t want you to leave me” he mumbles against your chest, the two of you had been cuddling in his bed for the past three days and today you have plans that you need to start getting ready for.

“the movie isn’t even two hours, and then we’re going to go grab lunch, then I’ll be back” you promise, running your hands through his hair.

“that’s still to long” he says holding on to you tighter.

“baby, don’t you think you’re being a bit clingy?” you jokingly ask, missing the way his body stiffens for half a second, face dropping, before he manages to regain his composure.

He squeezes your body one last time before untangling his limbs from yours, allowing you to get up and head to the shower.

The entire time you’re in the shower he sits on his bed, hurt.

Did you really think he was clingy? Was he annoying you?

He didn’t mean to, really, he didn’t, it’s just that he loved you so much and the past week has been a bit hard on him. His dads being a prick and being a pro hero can be physically, mentally and emotionally exhausting.

The second the door to the bathroom opens he’s back to being his normal self, still touching and holding you but not as much as before, and if you noticed you didn’t say anything, still continuing on with your makeup as he scrolls through his phone.

Its when you get back after lunch that things start to go downhill.

You expected Shoto to be all on you the second you stepped foot inside the house, but he wasn’t. when you walked through his bedroom door he just gave you a small smile, asking how the movie was but never taking his eyes off of his phone.

“are you okay?” you ask confused. The last thing Shoto ever did was pay more attention to his phone than you and it was a bit weird that he hasn’t even really looked up at you since you’ve been here.

He nods, humming his answer still not looking in your direction.

“then why wont you look at me?” you whine, walking over towards the bed and glaring over at him. His eyes find yours

“happy?” he asks and your eyebrows furrow. Why is he mad at you?

“are you okay?” you ask again “did something happen while I was gone?” you question cause you don’t see how he could’ve went from literally attached to your hip to basically ignoring you.

“nope” he says, putting extra emphasis on the p and you narrow your eyes, something is definitely up with him.

And you’re going to figure out what it is.

You head to the bathroom and change out of your clothes. When you walk back into the room he’s still in that same exact spot, eyes focused on his phone.

You lay down on the bed, deciding to take a nap, and hoping that he’d be back to normal when you wake up. Or maybe he’d take a nap with you and when you wake up his arms will be wrapped around you like usual.

However, when you wake up his arms are not in fact wrapped tightly around your waist, instead he’s still in the same position, phone in hand.

Turning over on the bed you snatch his phone out of his hand, holding it behind you back when he looks up at you and asks for it back.

“can I please have my phone back?” he asks, an unamused look on his face.

“why are you ignoring me?” you question

“I’m not ignoring you” he deadpans

“then why aren’t you attacking me in kisses or cuddling me? When I left you were all on me and now you’ve barely said two words to me since ive been here”

“I didn’t want to be clingy” he says and that’s when you realize why he’s been acting like this. Its because you called him clingy before you left when he wouldn’t let go of you.

“sho” you say softly as you put his phone down on the bed, grabbing his face and forcing him to look at you. “baby I was just joking when I said that. You know I love when your clingy, hell I’m just as clingy if not more” you tell him, slowly moving to straddle his lap.

“really?” he asks quietly and your heart breaks. He’s been upset all this time because of you and your stupid mouth.

At that your eyes light up. You hurt him with your stupid mouth so now your going to make him feel good with your stupid mouth.

“Fuck” he groans out, thrusts slowing down and you feel the first drop of cum hit the back of your throat, humming in delight, ready to swallow every last drop of him.

You continue sucking on the head, even after he finishes cumming, forcing him to shudder.

You smile up at him, loving how fucked out he looks and he hasn’t even fucked you yet. Standing up, you push him back down on the bed, legs instantly straddling him.

“ride my face first” he says and who are you to turn down head? Moving up, your thighs on either side of his head, pussy hovering over his face.

His big hands grip both of your thighs, pulling you down the rest of the way, tongue instantly finding your soppy cunt.

He licks a strip from your slit up to your clit, circling the small, sensitive nub with his tongue.

Your hands grip the headboard tightly as you begin slowly circling your hips as he continues lapping at your pussy.

The sounds he’s making underneath you are so lewd it brings a blush to your cheeks as he slurps on your juices as if he hasn’t had any water in weeks.

As your orgasm approaches your moans get louder. Your now fully grinding your pussy down on his face, fingers pinching and tugging at your nipples.

“gonna cum” you tell him and as he sucks your clit into his mouth, sucking hard. He continues his assault on your pussy as you cum, cleaning up all of your juices.

He has the two of you flipped over before you’ve even fully came back down to earth. He’s lining himself up and slowly pushing inside, head thrown back in pleasure.

A loud groan escapes you at the stretch, filling incredibly full. He begins slowly thrusting inside of you, the wetness of your wall allowing him to do so easily.

“that’s it baby, fuck this pussy was made for me” he grunts into your neck, teeth nipping at your sweet spot.

After leaving a few hickies along your neck and chest he wraps one of his hands around your throat, squeezing lightly.

The two of you had talked about choking in the bedroom before but it never happened until now and it seemed to light a fire deep within both of you.

“sho! So big!” you cry out as best that you can, as he repeated thrusted deep inside of you, the thick head of his cock hitting that spot inside of you with each thrust.

Instead of responding, Shoto just brings the hand that wasn’t lightly wrapped around your neck down to your abused cunt and begins pinching and rubbing at your clit, as your body spasm’s and convulses as another orgasms rips through you.

The way your walls clench down around him leads him to his orgasm, grunting as he cums deep inside your walls, slowly pulling out as he feels himself going soft.

He places a quick kiss to your sweaty forehead before getting up and heading to the bathroom, before returning with a wet washcloth. He begins gently cleaning you, pressing soft kisses along your thighs, telling you how much he loves you.

[the-s1lly-corner]

So I just remembered the hanahaki disease trope and I think it’s perfect for Jax (You could include Gangle and/or Zooble too, they’d be p interesting)

Jax is horrible with showing vulnerability and confessions are quite vulnerable… he can’t really die in the DC but he can still suffer

Jax and Zooble with Hanahaki disease !

not explicitly x reader but you can still perceive it as such and im still tagging it as such so those who want it uhuhuhuh this post sure is gonna be interesting :0! honestly between all of the cast, i think these two are the most likely to suffer from hanahaki, gangle is a maybe but i cant think of anything for her sob sobs and i can kind of see caine also possibly getting it due to not understanding romantic stuff but thats assuming he can sick and also assuming he doesnt immediately confess to the reader upon realizing his feelings shrugs

JAX:

just going to say it flat out, if this were the real world jax would likely die before confessing anything simply because he hates the concept of being vulnerable, as well as being the one to have to open up... god this wouldnt be so hard if it were the other person suffering; as terrible as it sounds... though, i dont think jax is the most.. emotionally mature of the bunch so he likely would have a mindset like that... in the beginning, after he notices the first petals he probably starts hiding them when he realizes whats going on.. probably legitimately starts swallowing the petals because he cant stand the idea of someone seeing him cough them up... and i dont know the health risks of digesting flower petals, especially ones that just spawned inside of you, but that probably worsens his overall health. thankfully (if you can even say that) he cant die in the digital world.... which... allows things to drag out for longer, and its going to take a lot for jax to just swallow his pride and confess something of this nature... even if it means hes in excruciating agony... though, i can also see him just wanting to get it out of the way when he finally hits his limit, as humiliating as it is

just saying, if hes ever cured and actually gets with the person hes in love with, theyre going to have to work on his fear of vulnerability

ZOOBLE:

very similar to jax in terms that they also dont like being perceived as vulnerable. but for a different reason. jax doesnt like showing that kind of stuff off because he thinks love is gross and yucky! how dare he be flustered when someone calls him cute! zooble, on the other hand, more so doesnt like the idea of growing an attachment. especially in the digital world where your mental state is so vital to your physical state... nope too risky and they dont want to make the other person feel they need to keep going to spare them the hurt blah blah blah, stuff like that. though... this makes me wonder where the flowers come from, since zooble doesnt have a mouth... maybe they just... spawn out of where the mouth would be? i think that would make it easier for them to hide it for longer, until someone actually sees the petals actively coming out... less of a clean up too, since they cant bleed... but perhaps they are covered in a black residue, not too different from the stuff pomni throws up in the pilot.. shrugs.. between the two, zooble is more likely to crack and confess, though. jax has his pride to protect, but zooble isnt nearly as invested in their ego.. though i do think they try to play it off after the confession.. shrugs

[kotamagic]

In this week's Lore Olympus, things are going from really fucking bad to NOPE.

Fresh from watching Hades get yoinked away by a possessed Morpheus, Persephone goes on the air to announce his disappearance.

Apollo's televised accusations for the Mortal Realm crisis already put Persephone in a terrible light. This announcement certainly doesn't help the situation, but at least Persephone is being upfront about it.

We get to see a rare, real moment of Apollo being unsure of what to do. He puffs himself and staggers now that he has the upper hand, but that's all for naught without the support of the other gods.

What is this pink thing Ouranos gives him? I have a theory....

Eons ago, Ouranos weaponized his fertility goddess wife's powers for his own ends. While she may have pretty much been burnt out and used up, who is to say that there wasn't the tiniest bit leftover? I suspect that this is the pink thing that he hands to Apollo.

The way he states that it won't work by itself further enhances that theory. Persephone's fertility goddess powers are on the fritz. Using the blob would act kind of like.... jump starting a dead car battery? (Does that make sense?)

Apollo announces he has the solution for the Mortal Realm crisis and reaches out to Persephone. Of course, he's a full-blown cocky jerk about it, but did we expect anything less?

I appreciate Persephone's retort. I think ALL of us would love to see her use her death powers on him. Even if it didn't kill him, I imagine it would hurt a lot. (And we'd all be cheering for that!)

Even with Hades kidnapped, Persephone has folks looking out for her safety. She doesn't want to be the damsel in distress forever, and that's part of why she's putting on a brave face and going to Asspollo Apollo's meeting.

A part of her feels the need to face her fear of him. It's dangerous, and anyone who has been paying attention and is in the know of Persephone's SA knows this is physically, mentally, and emotionally dangerous.

But Persephone is not alone. Very happy to see that not only is Hecate offering help, but Ares as well.

I know Ares is talking about Hera here, but I feel he speaks for all of us reading. Just saying....

This makes me suuuuuuuuuuuuuuper uncomfortable. The look in his eyes and the fact that he's physically touching her (IDGAF that he asked this time!) sets off every alarm bell and then some.

As I mentioned earlier, I think it's the dead car battery scenario.

In reverse of a metaphor i used in previous posts, Persephone is the DEVICE that does the thing, but needs the power. The pink blob (through Apollo) is the BATTERY.

Looks like it's making her Spring powers work, but for how long? And if it's only while Apollo holds her hand, he's likely to use that as an excuse to force marriage on her.

Maybe the pink blob will stop working at the worst possible time for Apollo, and his bullshit will get exposed? We can only hope.

Anyway, thanks for coming to my LO post!

[whitleyschn33]

Actually hi, no, can we talk about how the Punderstorm is the physical manifestation of a mental or emotional problem, it singles out Blake and Yang specifically, putting them in a situation where they're far apart with a gaping chasm before them, and the only way for them to be able to truly come together is to "say things they've never said to each other before" and bridge the gap between them -

-and instead of addressing any of the actual problems that should be keeping them from reaching an understanding with each other, instead of exploring the idea that maybe these problems going unaddressed is the reason that they aren't already officially dating even though they've been acting like they are for the last two volumes, instead of finally coming back to the arguments, hurt feelings, and trauma from the Mistral arc that were never properly resolved, instead of finally talking through those problems and coming together now having a new understanding of each other and able to move forward, not with a massive chasm of misunderstanding and disconnect that drives them apart emotionally, but finally together again, instead of any of that -

They just have the two compliment each other and reassure each other about things that were never an issue in the past. Like, Yang's big line is "I like that you've never been intimidated by me. Even when you didn't like me all that much," - since when has Yang had an issue with intimidating people? And she's never brought up anything about liking Blake for not being afraid of her (which is ironic, giving how much more subdued Blake has become in later volumes). And then after Blake says that she was wary of people, she says "But you never gave up on them. Even when they hurt you. You never give up. You know what matters to you."

LIKE??

Yang, she left you, remember? That was the entire issue back in Volume 5, that you felt like she did give up on you, just abandoned you without a reason or goodbye - why are you now reassuring her that she doesn't give up on people? It's literally only Ilia that fits this idea of "you don't give up on people even when they hurt you", and she did leave Ilia initially when she left the White Fang. This doesn't feel like "something Yang never told Blake before", something Yang never actually told Blake would be "I was hurt when you left, I felt like you abandoned me, like I was nothing to you. I understand now why you did that, but it still hurt that you didn't even say goodbye" and then they can take a step forward and continue on with their heart to heart -

But nope. The things they never said to each other before, the problem that are said to be more mentally or emotionally impactful than the crossroads RWJ are in, is being able to call each other smart and brave and be all fluffy even though they've had absolutely no trouble being affectionate with each other for the past two and a half volumes.

And it kills me because there's something in here that could be so compelling, a few different somethings actually.

Having Yang and Blake act like everything is resolved between them, trying to act on those budding feelings for each other throughout V7/V8 but one or both of them awkwardly pull back each time, not quite able to cross that divide because those issues weren't ever actually resolved, and now it's time to finally be able to address the problems so they can finally have what they both want.

During V7 and 8 they try to let it go after the fight with Adam but tempers are still short, with the two awkwardly clashing and arguing with each other all the time - over Mantle, Ironwood, Salem, etc. They're both feeling hurt and unsure what to do - they don't want to fight, but they keep falling into arguments that make it difficult to work together, even having a fight during the Punderstorm, so the Ever After puts them in timeout to clear the air and stop this wound from festering any longer so they can work as a team.

Yang grappling with her love for Blake and her hurt at being left behind, trying so hard to just be friends again because Adam's gone now and Blake's here and she's happy with Sun, it's fine right? She never actually told Blake about any of the things she felt after she left, but it's over now, so no need to bring up the past, yeah? Trying to put both love and hurt behind her but still overwhelmed by both, culminating with an argument in V8 that's left unresolved until this point in v9 where Yang finally gets to talk about everything she feels towards Blake and so they can finally be on the same page again and start to actually heal.

But no. We get fluff. Instead of any resolution to any of the problems that should have been resolved years ago, we get a confession built on issues that weren't issues and was literally forced onto the characters by a plot contrivance. Okay.

[badassturtles235147]

Things I would change in Shredder and Karai's relationship, and Splinter and Karai.

Shredder and Karai

Ok, I'm going to start with Shredder. Frist, people like me, can obviously see that Shredder was being totally abusive towards Karai, in more ways than one and the thing I would change, I would change how we did not get to explore enough of Karai's childhood.

Am I the only one who, after watching the Lone Rat and Cubs episode, was like, "Huh, I wonder what Karai's childhood was like?"

I mean I get it, the turtles were the main characters, so we got to see their origin but, in my opinion, I think seeing Karai's origin, her childhood, would have helped and made up for all the things we don't know about her!

Like how did she become a kunoichi? How did she meet Shinigami? Did she have any other friends besides Shinigami? And we could have seen more of her and Shredder's relationship but nope! No. Karai doesn't get an origin or even an episode of her very own, no, she gets nothing but LeoRai. Barf!

So, yeah, I would defiantly explore more in Karai's life and her relationships in the Foot, mainly, Shredder and Shinigami. Sad as it would be, I would have liked to see, how neglectful, emotionally, mentally, or even physically abusive Shredder was towards Karai. And I would have loved, to see how she and Shinigami became friends, and get a little bit of Shinigami's story as well.

Another thing I would change, is Shredder's obsession over her. Shredder comes off way too obsessive and creepy, and I know you guys think I am crazy but, he honestly does come off as some sort of predator.

The way he says, "She's mine!" Is the same way, how he said Shen was his. It just feels like Karai was Tang Shen's replacement to him. I mean, honestly, I wouldn't put it below him because I truly believe Shredder is that evil and sick, but...no. No. I would have done it like Thanos and Gamora.

He still would not love her, just act like he did. At first, Shredder took Karai and kept her, because he wanted complete revenge of what Hamato Yuuta did to him and he wanted something to remind him of his victory, also a reminder of the woman he (so-called) loved.

In truth, Shredder hated Karai, and hated being around her. He would never speak to her unless absolutely necessary or when he punishes her. Every time he looks at her, he sees the face of the woman he killed, and she would also remind him of her father almost as much as she reminds him of her mother, which would just fill him with so much hate and disguised.

But then, when he saw Karai's potential, saw how useful and deadly she was, Shredder found a new use for her and so, he trained her as his weapon. A weapon he trusted most to get the job done. After that, Karai was almost always by Shredder's side. He still would see Shen or Yoshi in her, and when that happened, he would lash out, violently but he was slowly, shaping Karai into his perfect image and he hoped that soon, he would rid of all traits of Yoshi.

However, Karai was stubborn as her father was and she was fierce as her mother. No matter what Shredder did, Karai never lost herself completely, never gave him too much control over her. She was his perfect weapon, his favorite daughter, but she was never going to allow him to own her and her choices.

Last thing I would change, is that I would have not let Karai get captured by him so much! I am so sick of the whole, damsel in distress! The only one, I would keep is Vengeance is mine because I do like Karai's mutation and I think it's really cool, and different for her character. (Sucks that we didn't get to explore much of her mutation either)

Splinter and Karai

Ok, first thing I would change, is how these two have no relationship at all! Don't you guys want to get to know each other, make up for lost time?! Splinter, since episode two you have been saying how much you miss your daughter and regret what happened the night she died! Karai, you have been wanting your father's love and attention since we've met you, and you now have a father who is ready to give that to you! Like, what was the point of Splinter having a long-lost daughter if they were never ever going to spend any time together or have at least one episode of them, spending time together, like Splinter does with April!

When Karai comes back, saying she wants to rebuild the Foot and yadda yadda, I would want Splinter to one day check on her and then somehow, have Shinigami convince Karai to let him join on a mission.

They do some bonding, maybe a little bickering, and their father-daughter relationship start to grow from there.

I would have also liked it if Splinter got to tell Karai, how he met his mother and maybe a little background of his childhood.

Another thing I would change, is how after Splinter saved Karai from the brainworm, I wouldn't have let her fall. I mean, this man got a pile of steal metal pipes off of him, sending them flying when Shredder hurt Leatherhead and yet, he could not pull up his own daughter from falling down a drain? Give me a break!

No, I would have let Karai be saved and reunited with her family, and instead of going to Japan to get Shinigami, she stays with her family and calls her friend to come to New York because she will need her help for future battles.

Finally, the last thing I would change, is how Splinter does not help Karai through her trauma when she clearly has a lot. He probably just wants her to make the first step and come to him when she is ready, which I understand but I would have loved it, if Splinter helped guide her, like he always guides his sons in the right direction. Maybe telling her of some of the mistakes he made because when he first warned her of revenge, I swear, it sounded like he was speaking from his own experience with it.

[daenerysies]

Honestly, I think the Alicent stans are gleeful about what the show did to Alicent's character because now they can fully indulge in their dislike of Rhaenyra (all Targaryen women because apparently, they're all evil whores who don't fit into the image of a perfect Westerosi Lady), prop up Alicent's "suffering" as something aesthetically pleasing, and fixate on Alicent being a repressed lesbian "betrayed" by her crush and how Rhaenyra is a spoiled brat who abused poor baby Alicent. Don't even get me started on the constant comparisons they make between Sansa Stark and Alicent Hightower. "ALICENT WALKED SO SANSA STARK COULD RUN!" The theme is not only worrisome but nauseating.

that seems to be the case, doesn’t it anon? i think it feels vindicating for them, due to the whole ‘she spent her entire life suffering in the name of duty and honor, she deserves a conciliation prize’ like you mentioned (maybe there’s some deeper trauma that needs to be looked into for some of them idk) as if said 'prize' doesn’t end up costing her her entire family. the way they’ve written her in the show just screams the glorification of abuse. she’s allowed to physically, mentally, and emotionally abuse her own kids in their eyes bc she too was abused, every misdeed she commits is because she was abused, etc. she isn’t allowed to just want her son on the throne despite the set-back it would do to women, she has to have some sort of sob story to make her seem more sympathetic bc women can’t just be against other women without reason (eye roll) or be antagonistic in general without reason. the queer plot-line was also not needed seeing as it was doomed to fail from the start and its existence dives deep into queerbaiting and even racist territory; subsequently, they decided to make the velaryon’s black and then completely sideline laena, rhaenyra’s actual queer love interest, in order to uplift and pair the sad white woman with her instead (which is strange since it seems like most rhaenicent shippers loath rhaenyra, but i digress). she’s not a complex character; she’s one-dimensional, inconsistent, AND the result of hypocritical writers not being able to understand that victimization doesn’t automatically mean interesting.

it also feels like half the time her stan's can’t decide if all of her suffering is bc of the men in her life, or if it’s *somehow* all rhaenyra’s fault that she was put in that position. the show has attempted to switch the power dynamics at play by aging alicent down and rhaenyra up, but it doesn’t work simply bc alicent still has more power than her as queen consort (and still spends around 10 years without otto's influence bullying and ostracizing rhaenyra, which is not how a mother terrified for her children's lives would act in the face of their would-be murderer). furthering that, the lack of critical thinking skills is blatant in this fandom and shows when they attempt to vilify the targaryen's (especially the women, yikes) because they only do so to uplift their own boring favs. show!alicent, and by extension, both media's versions of helaena, are passive characters who conform to and uphold the patriarchy, they’re the perfect type of women for incels and pick-me’s to glomp onto to ‘prove’ they’re not misogynists (see? we DO like women! (only if they’re submissive and don’t fight back ofc)).

the only comparisons between sansa and alicent would be their show characters. only the latter half of got for sansa makes any since comparison wise. she too was a character that was further victimized to make her seem more interesting and righteous in the show writers efforts to make her qitn (and also to further the bullshit mad queen dany plot line). sansa is still quite a compelling character without adding in an unnecessary rape plotline, but if they hadn’t included it the only similarities between these two women are that both are apparently redheads (nope) and bastard-phobic (debatable). that right there is where any and all similarities end. in reality, alicent is the cersei to rhaenyra’s sansa, not the other way around.

the fact that many consumers (especially the women) seem to like the adding of an abuse storyline to these characters is so gross, and really telling of how the media has construed the reaction one should have to gender-based violence (or benevolent sexism). they condemn and pity these characters for what they go through, but in the same breath, praise the writers for adding ‘nuance’ to these women’s stories. worrisome indeed.

[get-back-homeward]

Now and Then Day

This sideblog began after watching Get Back nagged and nagged at me until finally I started to look closer at context relative to the Beatles discography and suddenly started experiencing these WAIT WHAT moments every day as what I thought I knew got turned inside out. The appeal was in looking at something you knew like the back of your hand from another direction and seeing/hearing something new you hadn’t seen/heard before. But I had no idea we’d get another song to add to the mix in 2023.

I knew Now and Then day would be an experience. I thought I’d have to wait the whole day before listening. But I got lucky and found a few minutes to listen to Now and Then when it was first released this morning. And inexplicably clicked to hear the remastered Love Me Do instead. I cannot explain my brain.

I then tried to start Now and Then and noped out before 15 seconds in. Too overwhelming. Not the right time. I was too rushed and needed more space to mentally prepare for it.

I caught NPR covering the Now and Then release today on my drive home. They had a Lennon biographer (I didn’t catch the name) reviewing the song. He said the song recalls John’s more delicate tunes like Beautiful Boys (sic) and mentioned John started the song in 1970.

Say what?!

Here I was late last night trying to nail down a better date for John’s demo than “late 70s”. Meanwhile, biographers are just here on national public radio pushing lies. Did he have ChatGPT write his comments?

Oh yeah, they also said it was created with AI no qualifier.🤦‍♀️

They played a few snippets of the song including one new piece not in the doc but refrained from playing it in full. It was mostly wrong Beatles facts all segment.

Trying the song a second time hours later, I got through it in one piece but was feeling abit 🥴 about it as a song itself. Having just listened to the original demo was probably a mistake, and I could hear all the seams and feeling the Frankenstein song effect.

Third attempt sounded more together, with the seams not quite as noticeable. I was prepared for the changes, the layering bits from other songs, and noted highlights of the instrumentals: the strings, George’s guitar bits, and Ringo’s flourishes. I love Paul coming through on the future tense certainty of “I will love you” (is that I Will?). Ringo’s shimmering effect choice (is it tams?) is such an entrancing closer. Giles’ score and Beatles recycled bits do mend the seams well once I stop thinking about them too much.

On fourth listen, my biggest notes are questioning why Paul’s harmony with John isn’t more distinct. He shows a lot of restraint here but maybe too much? Did Get Back get to him in other ways than the most obvious? Is he just self-conscious about his own voice? Or is it the limitation of the tech when it comes to harmony mixing?

The strings were what I was most worried about, but their entrance at the 1:15 mark really kicks it up a notch to transition into the singalong. Other standouts are 1:40 with George’s flourish and 2:29 peak with the guitar solo.

Lyrically, it’s the conditional and if I make it through it’s all because of you that haunts in layers of meaning both grim and cathartic that reverberate through time and space.

If John makes it through emotionally to 1980 and has a comeback? Congrats, bud you did it. But he’s stopped physically through no fault of his own. There’s the obvious mourning of that lost potential even 40 years later.

If this song this voice this message of John’s makes it through to 2023 and reaches the public? Well, success there, Paul’s tenacity saw it through with help from many friends. John’s voice and song lives on through Paul’s wish to conjure him by his side. On the Day of the Dead no less. I was reminded of the concept of tulpas today and was knocked back on my heels by the thought.

If John as an artist and Beatles as a band make it through so fans are still listening in 2023? This doubles as a bit of a fan love letter, and thank you for 60 years. Released on the day Beatlemania first appeared in black and white.

But then there’s also a reflector on this. Some original Beatles fans have aged with Paul and Ringo and others have not and aren’t here to share this like John and George. There’s grief and mourning from those still here about those lost, and the song acts as a catharsis. A kind of thank you to the band for being there for fans in good times and bad. The symbiosis of fame between a band and its fans across the decades.

It’s a lot.

I spent some time looking at the youtube comments on the song. Some original fans but many second and even third generation fans. And quite a few stories about a loved one who loved the band and recently passed away like this one:

And this:

But also in there are stories of catharsis and healing.

And many memories of the joy that Beatles music has brought to people’s lives. We all have these stories of how their songs weave into our own life. But it’s the joy that I keep coming back to as the secret sauce to the band’s earliest days. I often think of those early songs more in terms of feeling then anything, and it starts with the first single.

I love the Love Me Do remastering. That harmonica sounds so crisp. The bluegrassy harmonies have never sounded better. The ones on ple-ee-ee-ease still give me chills. Ringo’s drums moved forward in the mix to appreciate that driving beat just a bit more. I can hear the bass too. I can’t wait to hear what the other early Red album tracks sound like.

But next to Now and Then, I’m also looking at the lyrics like I never did before. Why give it another glance? Written by a 16 year old kid, it always sounded a bit juvenile and simple. But suddenly next to Now and Then, there’s a weight to it I never heard before.

Love, love me do

You know I love you

I’ll always be true

So please, love me do

It sounds like a promise. Now and Then is fulfillment of that always. It’s no longer just the whim of a kid. But rather the beginning of 7 decade devotional: To John, to the band, to fans, and reflected back again. The love is reciprocal from all sides.

How’s that for a WAIT WHAT moment? Paul turning the least likely song inside out and backwards. And he didn’t even add a lyrical middle eight.

[whump-me]

Hello! Call me Zee (they/them). I like whump and I write stuff. I'm a long-time connoisseur of whump, and use this blog to share and collect the things that strike my fancy. Writing-wise, I’m a jaded veteran of the indie publishing trenches, and I’m here to use my powers for evil by writing stories as dark as my whumpy heart desires. I write some prompts and shorter stuff, but my heart belongs to long-form fiction. Expect defiance, torture, twisted and adversarial psychological intimacy, damage both physical and mental, and a lot of death. My longer stories will always end happily, if you define a happy ending as an emotionally satisfying victory for a sympathetic character, but don’t expect it to look like a fluffy caretaking arc.

I’m bad at tagging. I do my best to tag a few things that I know are big nopes for a lot of people (gore, noncon, character death), but if you need comprehensive tags for your mental health, it’s probably best not to follow. You can always ask to be added to the tag list for specific stories.

I have a Patreon! Read my fiction before it gets posted here, plus bonus Patreon-exclusive stories.

I boost whump writers who are selling their work, because writers should get paid and we need more whump in this world. Got a Patreon, a Ko-fi, an ebook for sale? Do you take commissions? Send me an ask, tag me in your promo post, or use the submit button.

Stuff I like:

Defiant whumpees

Cold whumpers

Whumpees of all genders, including lady whump

Interrogations!

Character death

Spy whump

Lab whump

Dehumanization

Fantasy and sci-fi whump

Mercy killing

Emotional whump

Team whump

Mind games

Degradation (nonsexual)

Stuff you’ll rarely, if ever, find here:

Comfort and caretaking

Fanfic

Pet whump/BBU

Masochism and voluntary submission

Extreme gore

Writing

Martyr (complete): sci-fi interrogation whump with a defiant whumpee, a cold female whumper, torture, emotional whump, and devastating personal realizations on both sides. Masterpost

Unburied (complete): written for the Whump Girl Summer event. Fantasy whump with spies, magic, human sacrifice, and loyalty that transcends death. Masterpost

Conquest (complete): no-magic fantasy whump with a royal whumper, a fearful but quietly defiant nonbinary whumpee, degradation, cultural differences, fantasy politics, and an intense and complicated relationship between whumper and whumpee (no romance). Masterpost

Whumptober 2023 (complete): a collection of standalone stories set in my Mind Games universe, a modern-day sci-fi/fantasy thriller setting with the feel of shows like The 4400, Flashforward, and Travelers. Spy whump, lab whump, so much emotional whump. Masterpost

Obscure (in progress): novel-length interrogation whump about a rebel leader who can erase memories with a thought, an interrogator who can see inside his subjects’ minds… and the connection they share that neither of them suspects. Part of the Mind Games universe. Masterpost

Unseen (coming soon): a whump novel about a ruthless mob heiress and the superpowered assassin she kidnaps and forces to work for her—and the unexpected friendship that develops between them. Part of the Mind Games universe. Masterpost

Standalone Stories Things That Need to Be Said Worth the Cost

[satankilledmyghost]

263 >:(

nope. nuh-uh. that didn't happen.

i'm making an executive decision here.

from here on out, anything that happens in the weak hero webtoon, no it didn't. it's not cannon. what's canon is that donald gets better, he's just in a coma for now. we all agree?? good.

i can't physically, mentally, or emotionally handle anything else.

i don't think any of y'all understand how much i love donald as a character. i loved how he developed from us getting everyone else's view on him, to how kingsley revered him, and then finally how donald saw himself. his 'character growth'which was really just us getting to know donald more as a human, was so compelling and sympathizing, seopass & razen did an AMAZING job at narrating the effects of the twisted roots of government, school corruption, domestic violence, familial death in a WEBCOMIC over a handful of chapters. everything we learned about donald was so humanizing, readers who hated him from his first appearance came around to liking him at the end. donald was so well written and fleshed out, same with other characters like gray, i physically cannot have or handle my favorite character die.

i'm not accepting this. i knew about donald's death for like a month now but i still can't get over it :C

i'm actually quite mad that this is the route seopass wrote for him, donald had so much potential as a character and they fucking fumbled the ball so hard it deflated.

i'm making my own ending, screw the canon one.

[crackinthecup]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

@gardensofthemoon thank you so much for the tag! It was super interesting reading your responses :D <3

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 51

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 465,678

3. What fandoms do you write for? Bold to assume I write at all I've always mainly just written for the Silm BUT I have recently become obsessed with The Locked Tomb series so miiiiiiight do some writing in that universe. At some point. Maybe.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Yield to the Moment takes the cake here, which is not surprising given that it's a 300k Angbang modern AU slowburn beast of a fic.

Then we've got Strange New World, set in my Swords 'verse, which takes a look at Melkor and Mairon post-Dagor Dagorath through a mental health-y and relationship/character study lens.

Third up is A bond once called fealty, also in the Swords 'verse.

Then there's The Metal Cage, which is shameless Angbang PWP focused on chastity play.

And finally A quiet sort of introspection, also part of the Swords 'verse, a bit experimental in the sense of taking Melkor's POV in second person.

5. Do you respond to comments? Always! I feel it's only fair if someone's taken the time to share their thoughts with me. Plus it's often such a fun, creative space where you get to bounce around ideas with the commenter.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Not entirely sure, actually. Don't think I tend to write particularly angsty endings. No Other Choice, maybe? It's about the Fëanorian attack on the Havens and the choice Elwing makes when she jumps into the sea.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Probably YTTM. I'm pretty pleased with the ending actually; feels like it pulls together a bunch of narrative threads and highlights all the amazing growth the characters have done. Also, it's a wedding at the end of a very long, very bumpy slowburn.

8. Do you get hate on fics? I have, yeah, years and years ago, around an abusive take on Angbang; but generally I find that the Silm fandom is very lovely and very welcoming.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? I do! Quite a lot of it haha. I think, for me, the appeal isn't so much the physical act in and of itself, but what's going on for the characters behind the scenes as it were, emotionally/psychologically. Especially with a ship like Angbang where they spectacularly fail at talking to each other so a lot of juicy unspoken stuff gets acted out through physical intimacy.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? Nope, never written a crossover, nor do they hold much appeal for me personally.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? I have. Sadly those fics had been written around 2015-16 and I deleted them a few years back at a time when my mental health was... spicy. I couldn't say whether the translations are still out there somewhere.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yep! YTTM started out as a co-write.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship? Angbang. There's just a lot of layers to their dynamic that scratch an itch in my brain. Power imbalance. Fucked-up-ness. Possessiveness/protectiveness. Worship. Loyalty.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? I've got a WIP from almost ten years ago about Celebrimbor in Gondolin and I'm not sure if the interest/time/motivation is still there for me to ever pick it up again :')

16. What are your writing strengths? Hmm I tend to put a fair amount of thought into characters' emotional experiences and I also enjoy playing around with fun ways to describe things.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? I guess there's a flipside to focusing on emotional experiences in that sometimes I might humanise characters like the Ainur too much and lose some of their eldritchness. I also tend to be quite disorganised with my plotting, and by disorganised I mean that I just sit down and start writing without a plan or outline and sometimes I can end up scrambling to tie everything together and make it make sense and I'm not sure how effective that is. Also also, I don't find endings very easy to come up with.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? Sure, if done purposefully in a way that furthers the plot or tells me something about the characters.

19. First fandom you wrote for? Harry Potter, I think! Those fics are not on the internet anymore and that is probably for the best haha.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written? Ohhh see, I don't actually like my own writing very much (cheers, perfectionism) and I very very rarely re-read it. But I do think some bits in YTTM are fun, and my latest ficcy that I've written (Reason to Try) which is a ficcy of @tarmairons' ficcy kinda shifted something in my brain for the better and I revisit it sometimes on bad mental health days.

Let's see which lovely people to tag: @markedasinfernal, @elevenelvenswords, @undercat-overdog, @lvsifer, @foxindarkness and anyone else who sees this and would like to have a go (if you want to! zero pressure)