#like when i think about it im actually so grateful

[soldier-poet-king]

In the euphoria of it being Friday and getting to leave work early and go home and play bg3, I had forgotten the absolute most horrifying thing my father said to me this morning

"you're starting to sound a lot like your mother" and given my parents marriage this has the added implication of (derogatory)

I'm just ???? HELL IM IN HELL?? I am 27 how tf is my voice apparently changing, is this puberty part 2??? Like? Is it not enough that all my mother's relatives think I'm her spitting image and CONSTANTLY remind me of that fact (but ofc still retain a few distinctive features of my father like forehead/eyebrows/mouth so I can't even escape either of them in the mirror)

But no now I also apparently have to SOUND like her??? Y'know the voice in my head that fuels so much of my self loathing? As if I already didn't hate my voice because I spent my childhood being told to be quiet because I was annoying, being told my voice was grating in its pitch and intensity, etc etc etc + PLUS hating it for Gender Reasons???

Can we give a bitch a break. For once.

[the-casbah-way]

i think every university student who has a job and studies at the same time deserves everything they want forever actually

[frecklystars]

i hope ryan gosling has the best birthday ever 🥺🥺💙💙💙

[coffeeandcalligraphy]

ok ok so you know how my life has majorly revolved around my pain since july & how that has been extremely difficult :) well lately I find myself getting up later than I want to & making my bed as badly as I possibly can & getting out of the house after noon when I planned to get out in the morning & walking to the library when it’s sunny & sitting there for hours & the whole time I’m most concerned with writing & that it’s incredible what I’m doing, it’s a little paradise

[todayisafridaynight]

Sorry to keep throwing Miscellaneous Asks your way, but I finally had a moment to get my thoughts in order on one of the points on your Venn diagram I wanted to talk about! I always kind of debate whether or not to send other, semi-unrelated long asks like this when we've already got a chain going, but oh well. I'll try and address anything brought up in response here in the main one and hopefully it doesn't get confusing lol.

So I was thinking about the extent of Jo and Arakawa's relationship. It is completely true there's not much you can say that's concrete, especially since most of what we see is from Jo's perspective. Although his perspective is crucial to forming an understanding of their relationship, it's not sufficient. This is particularly the case because, coming back to giri-ninjo for a moment, Jo is largely bound by giri; it's clear his loyalty runs deep, but it's not a choice for him.

Arakawa, on the other hand, can choose who he places his trust in, especially early on. And I think it's incredibly important that, despite having men who've already been with him from day 1, men who've already been helping him with his son, Arakawa chooses to "place every confidence" in Jo (per an old Famitsu profile, one of the first official ones) and chooses to make Jo his captain.

Similarly, he kind of chooses Jo "over" Ichi in sending Ichi to prison "instead of" Jo. Perhaps the family really would collapse without Jo's talents, but… does it have to collapse entirely? Didn't Arakawa make it pretty far on his own? I guess it's neither here nor there, but I've always wondered if things would've really played out as feared if Jo went to prison instead. Not to understate Jo's role in the family, of course.

Anyway, I think that trust shows not only in overt gestures such as entrusting Masato and the family's finances to Jo, but also in more subtle behind-the-scenes ways, such as what we were talking about before with regard to New Year's 2001. There's also the fact that leaking information to Aoki was Jo's idea; for that to be the case, Arakawa would have to discuss Aoki's threats at length with Jo. (Unrelated, but come to think of it, "complying with him [to] make him see value in keeping us around" is very often the strategy of victims of abuse and neglect…)

And this one's an underrated detail many people miss, but after Arakawa shot Ichi, while he was able to come up to Ichi to tell him he's counting on him and sneak in the fake bill, if the goal was to not arouse suspicion, I don't think he would exactly have been able to excuse himself from the dinner to drive Ichi to Yokohama. Time was of the essence in terms of Ichi's survival, so that leaves Jo, who was conveniently already at the scene and who was certainly in on the "secret rule" that constitutes part of the Arakawa Family's agreement with the homeless camp. Overall, there is a pattern of Arakawa approaching Jo before anyone else, isn't there?

Sort of branching off of that, I would personally feel comfortable saying that Jo knows Arakawa better than anyone else. He seems to know details about Akane and New Year's 1976 no one else does, details Arakawa would have had to volunteer himself, and that plus his own experiences are what allow him alone to have the most complete picture of that night.

I also get the impression Jo understands Arakawa better as a person than anyone else--certainly better than Aoki, but perhaps even better than Ichi in some cases. There are multiple instances where he defends Arakawa and challenges their perceptions of him--that he's "betrayed" the Tojo Clan, that he's betrayed Aoki, that he's the type to scheme and make power-plays behind Aoki's back. He hasn't. And, despite how little Jo's "allowed" to say, he turns out to be right every time. Also worth noting Arakawa does something similar in asking Ichi to try and understand Jo's frustrations, though he's more or less enabling Jo's abuse in doing so.

Lastly, The Smallest Detail that drives me kind of insane. Them arriving at the office in the back seat of the same car in one of Ichi's flashbacks. I wouldn't think too much of it if it were any other time of day, but the first-thing-in-the-morning quality and the fact Jo isn't driving (thus it's not as an act of service but as an equal) is like… Okay. You're carpooling to work. And if you're not carpooling, you're honest-to-god living together. What the hell.

So a lot of it is this web of inferences--it has to be, at least currently--but I really do think there's a lot to chew on. More than meets the eye, anyway. I've also been stewing in all of this for years, especially since drafting Jo's relationships section, so I might just have inhaled the fumes for too long lol

Thank you for coming to me about the nature of their relationship! Although I did put it down as being more-or-less 'uncertain' on my chart, I do agree that their relationship isn't as cut-and-dry as other relationships might be (it's going back to appreciating the complexities of RGG relationships, especially in the case of the Arakawa's where for every party involved it really IS complicated)

I wanted to exclude making any definitive statements on things that couldn't be verified without making a detour on the original post (I know I already mentioned frequently that Arakawa is able to joke about Jo being 'softer' on Masato, but I do think about their relationship often and the implied depth of Jo's loyalty if- as you said- he was able to climb through the ranks of the Arakawa family much quicker than preexisting members), but there are clear points in the game that due allude to a great trust between the two (and I also note that carpooling detail during Ichi's flashback- or at the very least I know I'd find myself noticing Jo sitting in the back opposed to the front/driving). It's definitely not hard to assert that Jo knows Arakawa well either, it's hard not to come to that conclusion when we have evidence from the game to infer that.

[bobmckenzie]

ok i don't know WHAT kind of brain fart I had but I've been thinking today marks 6 months since I started shipping with Bob... IT'S NOT SIX DLSKJFKSF IT'S EIGHT 😳😳😳 8 MONTHS!!!

so today i learned i don't know how to count but idec bc it's my 8 month bobiversarry lol ❤️

[ultramarine-spirit]

Has your love for the wmmap characters affected your personal life in any way? for example, has your love for athy made you like the color pink and roses more or something like that?

In my case, I name my pet Athy 🤣 the manhwa has made me like that nickname a lot, I also like "Lilian" or "Diana" more (well, Diana I've liked since Princess Diana and the Goddess. "Jennette" always I hated it for personal reasons and I still think it's a very ugly sounding name and not to mention Penelope sorry but in latam these names are vey ugly)

Athanasia sounds like Anastasia so i like it too.

Hmmm, that's a good question. I've read people say that wmmap has inspired them to connect with their families and develop healthier relationships. As for me, off the top of my head...

Well, for starters, thanks to wmmap I have made a lot of friends, something I'm really grateful for! A lot of cool stuff has happened because of that. It also has made me spend a lot of money lmao. A small price for Athy.

Oh, I picked up writing after literal years! (At a very, very slow pace. Life is very, very busy. But even so!) I truly love writing and reading, so that has been really rewarding.

I've always liked pink and blonde characters though, so that's nothing new lmao. If anything, Athy is just my type of character, in a lot of senses.

Ah. Sometimes I accidently call my cat "Lucas" when he is up to no good. If I ever adopt another cat, I should name him Lucas...

And not exactly what you were asking but, unsurprisingly, I have Athy as my phone's wallpaper, and every single person that sees her says she is really cute. Athy is objectively the most beautiful being to ever exist, after all.

[flovverworks]

its an eternal wonder i dont have ships here considering akiras my single muse who doesnt mind romance. like i know exactly why (i smash ppl into the friend category faster than lightning) but theres something comedic about it

[sorenlionheart]

i have to admit its kinda crazy being involved in fandoms again since the last time ive really been involved in a fandom was during my steven universe days

[likedbyuarmyhope]

i’ve really been an army for over six years huh. i’ve been an army for almost a third of my life

[sparring-spirals]

i just wanted to let you know how much i love your meta on this campaign, especially on imogen!! (my beloved) i’ve been seeing some negative takes on her lately, same old stuff with people ‘calling out’ how invasive and rude it is for to continue to use her telepathy on npcs without their consent and other nitpicky things? (to me there’s a weird line to draw since it’s quite literally one of the main ‘features’ that imogen has and if laura didn’t utilize it it’d be a bit of a waste imo but anyways-) imogen in general is just such a cool character to get into and analyze and your takes on her are always 👌✨✨

i appreciate that! thanks :)

i will say though, that for that particular telepathy take, i don't really disagree that there's an... maybe not invasive, but like. non innocuous nature to it? I do think that the way Imogen deals with psychic communication and voices in her head and like. Her entire concept of mental privacy is probably pretty informed as a result of. The Events Of Her Life. That said- she seems very aware of the unease and fear it can strike up in people, and, she uses it very effectively for intimidation effect and gaining the upper hand in certain interactions. That awareness- and willingness to use it- I think shines a light on a really interesting and integral aspect of her characterization. Slightly terrifying (affectionate).

I think on a more general note though, about people doing "callouts" or etc and the phrasing of like. rude, or, lbr moral judgements of her character overall. i. okay. i'll say first that I think sometimes people just don't. vibe with, or like certain characters and thats fine. (and good! I think its a good sign when there are characters with traits not universally positive that still feel very human and understandable and sympathetic). I also agree that it can also be frustrating to feel like someone is doing an. uncharitable, or erroneous read of a character you like due to pre-existing distaste. I've made my life easier by thinking of it as the other side of the coin where folks favouring a particular character bleeds into their assessments and assumptions about things.

But if its really weighing on you, blocking is always an option, and doesn't hurt anyone! Curating your own fandom experience is good- i think its valuable to see posts and follow people who don't always agree with you, but you're not under a moral obligation to keep seeing the posts of people who just have different (fandom) opinions and are actually upsetting you.

But yes. I do love analyzing Imogen- I love approaching all characters from the lens of trying to understand why they do whatever they do, and Imogen tends to land in a sweet spot for me where my indulgent expectations for her behaviour tend to pan out surprisingly often, and what she does feels right for where she's at. Even if I don't agree with it, even if its not a "good" thing (by whatever subjective measure). Its very satisfying! She's a complex character for sure. Its very fun.

[synonymouslyyours]

.

[july-19th-club]

infuriated outraged upset boss in the building on a saturday . at the DESK on a saturday. observed and overseen . in the panopticon and i dont even have a little coffee drink

[awkward-smirks]

.

[sanstropfremir]

Why are the theatre/film schools like that? 💀💀💀

In mine most profs were complete idiots. One of them, a well know actor and the president of the Academy at that time, did absolutely nothing in class. He bailed most of the time due to “shootings” and the few days he came we practically did nothing, just some chats with him about his job. To grade us he asked us to write in a paper what we thought we deserved. I kid you not.

Another one, who was a tv producer, was most likely very mentally ill and undiagnosed cause he would have the most random shitty ideas that we had to comply with and a lot of mood-swings. The day of the final exam he came 40 mins late because he was smoking week in front of the back door and then proceeded to give us the weirdest exam ever that kept us a minimum of 3 hours there. We had to make a plan of how to shoot an event and he kept adding snipers, famous people and animals to the mix.

There was one that I deeply hated cause we had 3 classes with him that were practically the same. He was more on the sociology side but did not know at all how to be a professor. His classes consisted of spiting facts and giving 10+ random bibliography per day. I learned nothing and I still have murderous waves every time someone mentions his name.

There was a couple who were married and had the sane vibe of old and way to classical. They were harmless until the end, when we learned that they blocked A LOT OF THINGS to make the space and curriculum better. Like, requesting funding to take a paid intern for their research lab of 3d shit, choosing the one (a friend of mine), signing the contract and then NEVER DO ANYTHING NOR SPEAK WITH THE CHOSEN PERSON. She had to go crying to the dean for a response and even then they were not held accountable. The school employed her as a paid intern in another department to make up for it but the rest never got resolved.

Other profs were alright, just very weird characters. The screenwriter prof was a very funny man but deeply depressed and had us all worried at first hour on Mondays (his Very Bad Day).

And on top of that was The Building™️. You see, ours was made by a very famous architect and it won several awards. Every couple of weeks we had someone taking photos of it. However, it’s the most impractical building ever because it was built as at a museum and not a school. The chairs are absolutely demential. So uncomfortable and very easily breakable BUT they cannot be replaced until 20-30 years from now because they signed a contract with the architect that said so. There is one (or two if your lucky) power plug per class but millions on the corridors. The bathrooms stalls are so narrow that if you want to enter with a bag/backpack you cannot close the door. In fact, some of those doors barely close without anyone inside. The editing rooms have gigantic windows where you cannot block the light so you can’t see shit on the computers. Well, windows are a thing in general. Classrooms have them but only one of them can be open partially with a button and let me tell you it does not help to ventilate properly 🙊. And the doors, boi, most of them had the handle broken so someone was always at risk of getting trapped there. You taught that they would fix this but it’s been more than 6 years since I finished and it’s still the same. There’s a twitter account that posts the shenanigans that are going on and most shit is the same.

So yeah, wild shit is always happening I guess 🤷🏻‍♀️

✨🎥 anon

literally all film/theatre schools are same shit different channel slkdfjsldkjflskdjflskdjflsdjflsdkjf oh i feel you for all of this. most of our profs did actually know what they were talking about thank god, but a lot of them were old bastions and hadn't worked professionally in AGES so they were sooooo out of date to how the scene actually operated in the modern era. we had a couple of real characters and one of which was the director for my thesis show, who was five foot zero inches and thin as a twig, wore leather pants frequently and called everyone 'lovey'. and like i previously said, was somewhere between 65 and 85 and nobody could tell bc she occasionally went to switzerland to have some crazy type of botox done to her face. we did have potentially maybe two sexual abusers?? i never got confirmation on any of it bc it was kept sooo tightly under wraps but in one case i'm not sure if there was any evidence brought forward (he was just a regular abuser though, that guy fucking SUCKED), and the other guy i only found out about from a former student bc the whole thing got swept under the rug bc his wife ALSO worked in the department. also the whole staff was like. so racist. the year after i left one of the shows that went up to committee for season suggestion was a show written in the 70s that had a bunch of racial slurs in it (and no people of colour in the script) and almost the entire student body put a petition up to remove it from selection but the director wouldn't stand down so they did it anyways 💀💀💀 i was fucking glad i was out of that hellhole by that time.

and oh my god the building architecture.....never before have i been so glad that there's no famous architects from anywhere near my hometown bc fuckin YIKES. we had a designated separate building from the rest of campus that was built in the 80s specifically for the theatre department, so we rarely left bc all the rehearsal rooms + class rooms were all in there with the theatres. and almost no non-theatre students came in bc there was only one 'theatre' class that a non-registered theatre major could take, and that was a public speaking class, so every time that class happened once a week we'd all give eyeballs to the lost looking business and sciences majors coming in. also there were signs on like every door that said 'no non theatre personnel beyond this point' (bc the building also had the box office and held audiences for when the shows were running) so anyone who was lost always looked extra lost. plus the whole thing was a huge maze bc there were upper level catwalks and corridors that connected the grid + fly systems between the two theatres, so the techies sometimes would go up to the upper levels and not come down for the entire day.

oh and there was a tradition where if you had sex in the building you would mark the spot with a black 'x'. in my first year we did a show with a big coffin as one of the setpieces and on one of the last nights of the run two of the actors fucked in it

[chihirolovebot]

it has almost been one year since i published sleep awake. what the fuck.