#lord colson

[daddyavesxx]

So MGK at MSG update .

I'm standing here on a line waiting to go in. I'm just kinda minding my own business on my phone, right? Right. Look up for a second .. look back at my phone and then I do a fucking double take as I see FUCKING BAZE walking down stairs and I tried taking a pic of him and my hands are shaking. I'm looking at him and he smirks, saying "hope you have a great time tonight" .. it was stuck on my tongue that I had wanted to say "I'll have fun riding your beard" . But I squeaked out a thanks.

[jinx-on-mars-19xx]

[likeclarabow]

2023 Books Read

Our Wives Under the Sea - Julia Armfield (Dec 31-Jan 2)

See You Yesterday - Rachel Lynn Solomon (Jan 2-Jan 3)

All Dressed Up - Jilly Gagnon (Jan 4)

She Gets the Girl - Rachael Lippincott & Alyson Derrick (Jan 5-Jan 6)

Ready Player One - Ernest Cline (Jan 6-Jan 10)

Jamaica Inn - Daphne Du Maurier (Jan 10-Jan 13)

Greywaren - Maggie Stiefvater (Jan 14-Jan 16)

The Ballad of Never After - Stephanie Garber (Jan 17-Jan 22)

By the Book - Jasmine Guillory (Jan 22-Jan 24)

Portrait of a Thief - Grace D Li (Jan 25-Feb 4)

Pride and Prejudice (reread, audiobook) - Jane Austen (Jan 31-Feb 6)

Macbeth (reread) - William Shakespeare (Feb 6-Feb 10)

Normal People - Sally Rooney (Feb 18-Feb 22)

All the Dangerous Things - Stacy Willingham (Feb 23-Feb 25)

The Diary of Mary Berg - Mary Berg (Feb 17-Feb 27)

The Witch Haven - Sasha Peyton Smith (Mar 4-Mar 11)

Americanah - Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie (Feb 26-Mar 12)

The Witch Hunt - Sasha Peyton Smith (Mar 19-Mar 22)

Jonny Appleseed - Joshua Whitehead (Mar 19-Mar 28)

The Mysterious Affair at Styles - Agatha Christie (Mar 25-Mar 29)

Last Violent Call - Chloe Gong (Mar 30-Apr 1)

Beartown - Fredrik Backman (Apr 1-Apr 4)

People We Meet on Vacation (reread) - Emily Henry (Apr 5-Apr 7)

Notes on an Execution - Danya Kukafka (Apr 8)

Kiss Her Once For Me - Alison Cochran (Apr 8-Apr 10)

If You Could See the Sun - Ann Liang (Apr 11-Apr 15)

Murder at the Vicarage - Agatha Christie (Apr 15-Apr 19)

The Appeal - Janice Hallett (Apr 19-Apr 20)

The Black Spider - Jeremias Gotthelf (Apr 20)

Molly of the Mall - Heidi L.M. Jacobs (Apr 21-Apr 22)

The Dark Descent of Elizabeth Frankenstein - Kiersten White (April 23-Apr 25)

Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen (April 26-Apr 28)

Happy Place - Emily Henry (Apr 29)

Us Against You - Fredrik Backman (Apr 30-May 3)

The Great Gatsby - F. Scott Fitzgerald (May 3-May 5)

Juniper and Thorn - Ava Reid (May 6-May 10)

Meet Me at the Lake - Carley Fortune (May 11-May 12)

Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell (May 12-May 19)

Anne of Green Gables (reread) - L.M. Montgomery (May 19-May 22)

Anne of Avonlea (reread) - L.M. Montgomery (May 24-May 26)

Anne of the Island (reread) - L.M. Montgomery (May 26-May 30)

The Winners - Fredrik Backman (June 2-June 6)

Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier (June 7-June 8)

Peril at End House - Agatha Christie (June 9)

The Many Lives and Secret Sorrows of Josephine B (reread) - Sandra Gulland (June 11-June 12)

Tales of Passion Tales of Woe - Sandra Gulland (June 13-June 14)

The Last Great Dance on Earth - Sandra Gulland (June 14-June 15)

Frankenstein in Baghdad - Ahmed Saadawi (June 15-June 18)

Crooked House - Agatha Christie (June 22-June 24)

Northanger Abbey - Jane Austen (June 20-June 30)

I Must Betray You - Ruta Sepetys (June 30-July 1)

Pageboy - Elliot Page (July 2-July 4)

This Time It’s Real - Ann Liang (July 6)

The Last Word - Taylor Adams (July 6-July 7)

The Fiancée Farce - Alexandria Bellefleur (July 7-July 8) 

The Guilt Trip - Sandie Jones (July 8)

Camp Zero - Michelle Min Sterling (July 8)

The Berry Pickers - Amanda Peters (July 8-July 9)

Family of Liars - E. Lockhart (July 9-July 11)

The Last House Guest - Megan Miranda (July 11-July 12)

The Last Tale of the Flower Bride - Roshani Chokshi (July 14-July 21)

Rolling in the Deep (audiobook) - Mira Grant (July 20-July 21)

Wunderland - Jennifer Cody Epstein (July 21-July 23)

The Stationary Shop of Tehran (July 24-27)

Yellowface - R.F. Kuang (July 27-July 29)

These Violent Delights - Micah Nemerever (July 29-Aug 3)

Wuthering Heights - Emily Brontë (Aug 3-Aug 5)

Begin Again - Emma Lord (Aug 6-Aug 8)

Medicine Walk - Richard Wagamese (Aug 8-Aug 12)

419 - Will Ferguson (Aug 16-Aug 19)

Harlem Shuffle - Colson Whitehead (Aug 21-Aug 24)

Ballet Shoes (reread) - Noel Streatfeild (Aug 25-Aug 26)

Songs for the Missing - Stewart O’Nan (Aug 28-Aug 31)

You’re Not Supposed to Die Tonight - Kalynn Bayron (Sept 1-Sept 2)

I’ve Got Your Number - Sophie Kinsella (Sept 2)

The Adult - Bronwyn Fischer (Sept 3)

Nine Liars - Maureen Johnson (Sept 4-Sept 6)

Small Things Like These - Claire Keegan (Sept 6)

The Honeys - Ryan La Sala (Sept 15-Sept 19)

20,000 Leagues Under the Sea - Jules Verne (Sept 12-Sept 20)

Beowulf - Unknown (Sept 8-Sept 21)

The Mirror Crack’d From Side to Side - Agatha Christie (Sept 21-Sept 25)

Better Than the Movies - Lynn Painter (Sept 26-Sept 30)

Annihilation - Jeff VanderMeer (Oct 4-Oct 7)

And Don’t Look Back - Rebecca Barrow (Oct 7)

Hallowe’en Party - Agatha Christie (Oct 8-Oct 9)

Cannibal Island - Nichlolas Werth (Oct 9-Oct 22)

The Final Gambit - Jennifer Lynn Barnes (Oct 17-Oct 22)

Stalin’s Nomads: Power and Famine in Kazakhstan - Robert Kindler (Oct 16-Oct 24)

Six of Crows (reread) - Leigh Bardugo (Oct 25-Oct 30)

Crooked Kingdom (reread) - Leigh Bardugo (Nov 3-Nov 7)

Sadie (reread) - Courtney Summers (Nov 9-Nov 10)

The Invisible Man - H.G. Wells (Nov 6-Nov 13)

Hamlet - William Shakespeare (Nov 6-Nov 13)

A Good Girl’s Guide to Murder (reread) - Holly Jackson (Nov 11-Nov 15)

Good Girl, Bad Blood (reread) - Holly Jackson (Nov 15-Nov 18)

As Good as Dead (reread) - Holly Jackson (Nov 20-Nov 23)

Red White and Royal Blue (reread) - Casey McQuiston (Nov 25-Dec 5)

The Secret History - Donna Tartt (Dec 18-Dec 22)

The Day of the Jackal - Frederick Forsyth (Dec 24-Dec 25)

Emily Wilde’s Encyclopaedia of Faeries - Heather Fawcett (Dec 25-Dec 27)

Murder in the Family - Cara Hunter (Dec 28)

Three Holidays and a Wedding - Uzma Jalaluddin, Marissa Stapley (Dec 29)

The Book of Cold Cases - Simone St James (Dec 30-Dec 31)

[osric-giroux-ffxiv]

Dusk Vigil Pt 1

The biting chill of the Western Coerthan Highlands - it was never ending, never abating, though on this particular morning it seemed particularly brisk, perhaps warning of the weather to come, if the clouds on the horizon were any indication. 

Osric scowled, adjusting the heavy coat around his shoulders before shifting to the edge of one of the many buildings around the edge of Falcon’s Nest, making the long jump down to the middle of the settlement where three of his men waited patiently - one speaking with one of the area’s regulars, the Skywatcher, the four looking up as the ex-dragoon approached.

“One day I’ll get used to that…” Colson Arkwright had been a traveling mercenary for several years before being hired by House Cress. He’d seen plenty of fighters, with varying skills. Apparently, seeing a man jump and land comfortably without shattering his legs and ankles was something that he considered to be incredibly impressive - despite having been in Ishgard for some few months at this point.

Osric tilted his head, offering an easy shrug. “Perhaps - I imagine you’ll see it a few more times before all is said and done. Now, what does our friend here have to say about the weather we’re likely to encounter?”

The man in question sighed, flipping through several papers before looking up at the clouds. “Nothing good, my lord. Especially if you’ve intent to head north. Surely you felt the breeze while you were atop the tower? It’s bound to start snowing before days end, and I’d expect horrid conditions for the remainder of the week. We’ve already cautioned the merchants and casual travelers.”

“A good thing we’re neither of those.” Osric smiled gently. “Your warning is duly noted, good man, and we’ll take the necessary precautions.” He reached into his pocket, pulling out a handful of gil and passing it over.

The Skywatcher remained cautious, and appeared concerned, but eventually nodded. “As you say, Lord Cress. I wish you safe and speedy travels. May you return before the worst of it finds its way here.” With another small nod he turned back to his instruments, leaving the four armed men to themselves.

“A good thing we all know the area then…” A second of his men, this one an Elezen - Silvaire Dailemont had been part of the Temple Knights for years before leaving of his own accord, and the man’s knowledge of the highlands rivaled his own.

“Indeed…” Osric hummed thoughtfully, glancing out over the wall, across the snowy plains for a long moment. “You all have warming potions and supplies, correct? Starters for fires and things of that nature. There’s nothing we need to purchase before we’re on our way.”

A short chorus of ‘ayes’ and ‘yes sirs’ greeted him and he exhaled with a quick nod. 

These three had been selected for their knowledge of the area - having been station at Falcon’s Nest before, or spent some time in the highlands, all three men were adept at handling the cold, but the weather did not bode well for what was supposed to be a simple clean out of an already ‘empty’ fort…an easy favor for an overly jumpy temple knight…

One week prior - Cress Barracks (former Slater Estate)

The sounds of metal against metal, raised voices, and of general activity surrounded him, and yet he heard almost none of it, focused in on the movements, steps, corrections - the rest of it was just noise. 

Osric moved between groups, taking notes on progress, what needed to be adjusted, what seemed to be working well, handing the notes off to the various groups instructors as he moved from group to groups - two wolf pups trotting along beside him, seemingly unaffected by the noises, but intrigued by the action. 

He’d pause, quickly jotting notes, changes to be made when a voice from the main building reached his ears - a rare occurrence for this time of day, as the building was almost entirely empty. 

“Lord Cress!”

Týr and Frejya at his feet turned and growled for a moment before he clicked his tongue to quiet them, recognizing the voice and then the face as he turned his head to look for the source of the voice. 

“Master Thierremont. Something I can assist you with this morning?”

Gaspard Thierremont had been, and seemingly still was, a Temple Knight - one whom Osric had had his fair share of encounters with while he’d been a Dragoon. 

While not a bad individual, per se, his presence did not inspire confidence or good feelings - only caution and wariness, feelings that Osric was becoming more and more accustomed to having as his…default. 

“Yes…well, perhaps. Is there somewhere we can speak privately?” 

“Of course.” Osric nodded to the nearby trainer, handing off his notes before clicking his tongue for Frejya and Týr to follow. “Right this way.” 

He led the armored Elezen through the newly renovated Barracks, to the room that had been serving as his office on the days he worked in the building, motioning for him to have a seat. “Coffee? Tea? It’s quite chilly out this morning.” The two pups moved to lay down near the edge of the desk, a pillow already laid out for them. 

“Ah…tea, would be lovely, thank you.”

A quick nod and he went about making the requested beverage, as he made his own drink - and after a few minutes, once both had their beverage and Osric was seated on the opposite side of the desk, he motioned for Gaspard to speak. “Alright, now…what can I do for you?”

“Well…not for me…for the Temple Knights.”

Leveraging the name this early…never a good sign..

Osric quirked an eyebrow as he took a sip of his coffee before motioning for Gaspard to continue. 

“You remember the Dusk Vigil…yes?”

“The Fort? Yes. Froze solid after the Calamity, everyone stationed there died, was my understanding. Some claimed it was haunted for a time. What of it?”

Gaspard swallowed roughly, turning his cup between his hands, “That last bit - the haunted bit - people have been incredibly slow to let that one go… There have been increasing reports of activity around the Vigil in recent days. To the point where we can no longer ignore it. Normally it’s so far out of the way that it’s just dismissed as an irritation, the reports are set aside, and it’s not given a second thought…”

“But…?”

“But, it’s gotten to the point where even traders who are making their way to Tailfeather are complaining about whatever is happening there.”

Osric frowned, setting his cup down on the desk. “The path to Tailfeather goes nowhere near the Vigil.”

The Elezen sighed and set his cup down before running his hands over his face. “Exactly - which is why this is becoming an issue. Whatever, or whoever has made it’s home up there is impacting things far enough south where it’s interfering with trade. And when trade is impacted…”

“People start to notice. So what has stopped the Convictors or the Temple Knights from intervening?”

“We haven’t the people - we’re still rebuilding, and the Convictors are useless unless their foe has wings and scales…even though we’ve had the discussion with them that dragons are no longer the enemy.”

“To clarify - what you are requesting is that I send a small force of my men into the Dusk Vigil to clear out whatever happens to be occupying the space so that business as usual may resume for the traders of Tailfeather and others outside of Ishgard proper, is that correct?”

Gaspard nodded, lifting his cup to his lips and taking a small sip. “Aye…that’s exactly what I’m asking for.”

Osric stood, turning to look out the window of the office, his hands clasped behind his back loosely. “It’s quite the ask you’re making, Master Thierremont.”

“I’m not expecting this to be pro bono work, Lord Cress. I may not be the Lord Commander, but I do hold no small measure of authority and the Temple Knights would most certainly be in the debt of House Cress should your men succeed in this endeavor.” 

Gaspard stood, setting his cup down and moving over to lean against the edge of the desk. “We need this handled, quietly. The renown your fighting force would receive for seeing this done, in addition to the Temple Knights being in your House’s debt ...surely it’s worth considering.”

There was a long pause before Osric turned back around to face Gaspard across the table. “Let’s get the details of this arrangement in writing, and allow me to see what reports you have regarding the Vigil. I believe we can see this issue handled for you, Master Thierremont.” 

Present day - Falcon’s Nest

“Lord Cress?”

Osric’s thoughts were quickly brought back to the present moment by a hand on his shoulder, and he glanced up towards one of the men with him - Silvaire.

“The Skywatcher seemed to imply that we’d have a few hours of clear travel if we were to leave now, my lord…you know as well as I do how imperative that will be.”

“Indeed. If we’ve all the supplies to keep us from freezing then let’s be on our way. Once we pass the bridge to the north, we’re essentially on our own. Colson, Geoffrey…”

Both men, Midlanders in their early thirties with a history of mercenary work, gave curt nods, the shorter of the two, Colson, pulling his jacket tighter around his form. “Let’s get going…more we move the sooner this is all done or at best, least we get around a fire. Colder than a witch’s titty in a brass bra it is…” 

“You ain’t never seen a pair of titties…, much less gotten to ask about a pair in a brass bra.” 

Silvaire glanced over at Osric who shrugged easily with a chuckle. “Let’s be off, gentlemen. It won’t get warmer while we stand here.” 

The four moved away from the center of Falcon’s Nest, down the ramp and out onto the snowy plains, the settlement growing smaller and smaller behind them as the wind steadily began to pick up.

It would indeed be slow going, and it seemed there would be a storm waiting for them. 

The question that seemed to settle in the back of Osric’s mind with each forward step…was just what kind of storm.

[jakeperalta]

when you think of someone ‘well read’, which books do you think about? i’m trying to expand my reading list and could really use some recommendations

ooh good question! I think I'd say a mixture of classics and modern classics/"you haven't read ___?!" type books. I'm by no means the most well resd but a few that come to mind that I have read so can vouch for would be:

any shakespeare (I am not very well read on my shakespeare admittedly but romeo and juliet or hamlet I think are good staples)

any austen, but especially pride and prejudice

little women by louisa may alcott

rebecca by daphne du maurier

the great gatsby by f scott fitzgerald

the handmaid's tale by margaret atwood

beloved by toni morrison

the hobbit/lord of the rings books (I've recently read the hobbit and am about to tackle lotr)

the underground railroad by colson whitehead

the goldfinch by donna tartt

educated by tara westover

[plethomacademia]

Open invitation for you to talk about Duet. I need you to talk about Duet. The full trope rundown the full everything just… AUGH. Duet!!!!!!!

Answering for this!

HELLO THANK YOU FOR FEEDING ME. Duet is my most favorite.

I have a bad habit of hitting any man who is mildly unpleasant with the Darcification beam and Enver Gortash cannot escape me. I used to read a ton of modern regency books and you know I stacked those tropes. I have no idea how accurate these are, I just read books!

We have the obligatory overbearing dress maker

Maeve is a classic ice queen in a lot of ways

In addition to the Darcy beam, I think Gortash is who people think Lord St Vincent starts as but actually IS as bad as people say

Ballrooms in themselves are a trope but I tried to include a lot of aspects, including the strict social norms on who can approach who

False Name

Wallflower

Reading about things in the papers and GOSSIP RAGS

Mr Colson is a direct Mr Collins joke, I just gave him a more Bingly personality

Obligatory dancing scene!

Obligatory balcony tryst!

Removing the gloves and first skin on skin moment

Under the skirt

Cinderella gone by midnight

The disguise breaking is a kind of I can only see you/I always see you trope, I think that's a thing

There is a lot of the trope where a noble has to pass a common woman, very Any Duchess Will Do (which is a book I reference for its desk scene in the long fic even though I think the B plot of the book is boring), so we have the new dresses, the jewels, the soap

[blueberry-bar]

hello you have hatchetfield ocs......... tell?

Yeah unfortunately I have a goober named Tegan Bailey, she’s the daughter of Officer Bailey and just as psychotic as him but like in a different way. She’s more lowkey psychotic and has little burst of crazy behavior. Detective Shapiro is like an Aunt giving her good advice while Officer Bailey... he's Officer Bailey.

Her best friend is Brooke and they have matching phone cases. In Sophomore year they spread the rumor about Travis Colson being poor after he wore a dirty shirt. And now whenever Tegan goes to work at the mall she see’s Travis and literally almost passes out.

She works at the Cinnabon and sucks at her job lowkey. Tegan makes the ‘I passed out six times but your cinnamon roll is ready’ joke which makes every single costumer really weirded out except like Ruth who thinks it’s hilarious. Her favorite costumer is Gerald cause he always tips a bunch, and who doesn't love Gerald.

Shes literally only friends with Brooke, Steph, Gabe, and Richie (poor guy has sit next to her in like 5 classes)

Anyways the lord in black she's connected to is Blinky, unlike the Woodwards Blinky LOVESSSSSSS the Baileys. I think he just like the last name because it sounds kind of like Blinky, but he follows Tegan around and gives her intrusive thoughts like

"go push his head into the water fountain"

"what? no! I'm not going to do that to bowtie boy. he's rich he could sue."

But anyways those were my rambles about my poor little psychotic meow meow Tegan, there will sadly be more in the future.

[e-b-reads]

I want to know about books 11, 22, 33, 44 and 55 💫

Thanks for asking! Lol, typically for me, every one of these is a mystery, but they're all pretty different!

11. Light Thickens, Ngaio Marsh - The final Roderick Alleyn mystery (not that they need to be read in order). This does actually have some characters return from a mystery set (and written) several years before this one; they have aged, but Alleyn apparently has not. It's a good stand-alone mystery set in a play house (one of Marsh's favorite things to write about), with various references to Macbeth.

22. The Redeemers, Ace Atkins - This is book 5 in the Quinn Colson mystery series, I spent a lot of the beginning of last year tearing through them (11 total), slowed down only by waiting for library holds to come in. The sort of arc of the series (which does take place over 10 or so years, each book set ~when it was published) is that former Army Ranger Quinn Colson comes back to his hometown in Mississippi and then runs for sheriff so as to get rid of the old corrupt sheriff - and then takes down a crime lord, and has to quit being sheriff, and gets voted back in, and another crime lord takes over... Anyway, they're grittier/more violent than a lot of the mysteries I read, but I was hooked. All the characters felt very well-rounded - all the good guys have significant flaws, but I love them anyway, and (almost) all the bad guys have moments where they're sympathetic, if not redeemable.

33. The Night She Died, Dorothy Simpson - OK, so I can't think of anything particularly wrong with this book, but I forgot I read it until looking #33 up for this list. The first in yet another mystery series (published 1980, set in England), and it was...fine? I didn't read any others in the series, but I did finish the book, so it was gripping enough for that!

44. One, Two, Buckle My Shoe, Agatha Christie - A Poirot book; Poirot goes to the dentist, and then later in the day, the dentist is found murdered! If you've read any Poirot stuff, then you have an idea where things go from there. This was a reread, I like the more domestic Christie books (as opposed to international intrigue).

55. Relic, Douglas Preston with Lincoln Child - This is also first in a series, called the Pendergast series. I actually remember why I read this - I saw several books from the series in the library, and was intrigued, so when I got home I found the first one on Libby. Honestly not sure that "mystery" is the best description - maybe a combo of horror and thriller and some supernatural elements. I did like this first one - it's gripping, and Pendergast is a charismatic character. There's some funky pseudoscience in this one (think Jurassic Park) to explain some pretty fantastic things, but it's made to sound reasonable; I read two more in the series, but when it looked like Pendergast was actually starting to time travel with the power of his mind in the third one, I decided not to read the other 19(!).

(Send me a number 1 - 206 and I'll tell you about a book I read in 2023!)

[sunriseseance]

what are some of your phenomal book recs? please i need to read more good books

OK HI

If you're looking for queer books:

The City and the Pillar by Gore Vidal

(post-wwii story about queerness and identity and coming into yourself)

Johnny Appleseed and Fullmetal Indigiqueer by Joshua Whitehead

(brilliant stories by an indigenous Canadian person about gender, sexuality, person, and place)

Zami: a new spelling of my name by Audre Lorde

(not quite an autobiography of a brilliant queer black woman)

Black Jesus and Other Superheroes by venita Blackburn

(the most beautiful short story collection I have ever read. Queer, black, rhythmic, stunning. Please, if you only choose one of my books, pick this one).

Non-queer but they're great:

Inherent Vice and Crying of Lot 49 by Thomas Pinchon

(amazing books about history, reality, and comedy. Cannot reccomend highly enough)

Libra by Don Delillo

(a story about the Kennedy assassination. Meaningful look at what we think of history)

Paradise, Beloved, Jazz by Toni Morrison

(her "trilogy" on historical blackness. Fundamentally brilliant. I especially reccomend Paradise, the story of a town told through the women)

The Underground Railroad by Colson Whitehead

(an anachronistic slave narrative that brilliantly confronts race and history)

Borderlands/La Frontera by Gloria Anzaladua

(a piece about modern identity centered around queerness, identity, and the America/México divide)

House of Leaves by Mark z. Danielewski

(a fundamental deconstruction of the form of the book)

I absolutely have others but I think these will be it for now! If anyone wants more lemme know

[triplexdoublex]

Do you think Colson knows about this blog? If so... Oh Lord👀🤦🏾‍♀️

Honestly I kinda hope he does I hope he gets off reading all the crazy shit I’d let him do to me 🥵

[im-overstimulated-and-im-sad]

Manifesting who I want to host sometime during season 48 for SNL- (a lot of these have hosted before; but they did such a good job and I’ve watched their episodes so many times I want them to host AGAIN.

People who should host SNL this year:

Leslie Jones- man I miss Leslie on SNL, and it’s been enough years she really ought to come back and host. She’s been long enough her “honey bunches of Jost” is married and has a child! That update appearance would be amazing.

Rob Lowe- so I was surprised once I finally broke down and got stupid Peacock that Rob Lowe has in fact hosted SNL three times! The most recent was in 2000 so it’s been a while but y’all, this ageless man is a delight. He has a show on a network right now so he has shit to promote and because his sons should be there to heckle him during the monologue.

Courteney Cox- I think she has a show right now, something with Greg Kinnear? Eh don’t quote me on that but I think she would be great on there and as far as Friends cast members go I still feel she is an underrated one.

Chris Evans- this is one where I feel he’s been asked and he didn’t want to do it. And that happens, like when Oscar Isaac hosted he mentioned in his monologue that he had turned them down when they first asked him to host in 2015. And cause Chris Evans has mentioned his struggles with anxiety in interviews it makes me think he wouldn’t be totally comfortable with this kind of gig? I don’t know there’s a chance he just hasn’t been asked but that seems unlikely to me, and also I want him to come on and tap dance.

Zendaya- this is the one I feel most like this could actually happen- she’s the youngest person to win an Emmy she could very well win another one in a few days, her career is on fire and she would be sensational.

Colson Baker- I want to see him host as well as be the musical guest, which I don’t know how likely it is since Pete has left, but he did say he was gonna release two albums this year and the European leg of his tour is scheduled to end in October so there would be time after that if he was on and then put his next album out. Cause come on he would be so much fun on there!

Allison Janney- this is another I’m surprised this hasn’t happened already. She’s been on literally so many shows and has I think like 62 Emmys? Like we need to make this happen!

Craig Robinson- WHEN I SAY PREHEAT, YOU SAY OVEN! Sorry that probably seemed weird- Craig Robinson made a show called “Mr Robinson” where that’s a line from a song he sings. The show isn’t that good and they only made six episodes but seriously- this man is so much fun! He has a current show in Peacock to promote! Andy Samberg could possibly pop in! This is another one where I don’t know if it will happen BUT IT SHOULD.

Emma Stone- this is one where she has hosted, in fact she’s hosted four times. But she should host again for the big five times! She’s one where even in the first episode she hosted she fits in so well, and her episodes are rewatchable AF.

RuPaul- another one where yes he has hosted but he needs to do it again! I need him to read more children at the library!

Taylor Tomlinson- oh sweet lord I LOVE THIS GIRL SO MUCH. Seriously please watch her Netflix specials if you haven’t yet- I want this one to happen more than anyone in this list I am such a simp for this girl. Okay this one and MGK are the two I want the most.

Sebastian Stan- I have no idea how this would go. But he’s done a lot of stuff this year and he is someone I could see them asking and him turning it down cause he does seem more shy and awkward in interviews. Maybe he wouldn’t rock it but I’m curious.

Taylor Swift- I do wonder why she hasn’t hosted again. She’s been on as the musical guest so many times but she only hosted once when she was 19, and as we all know, that is a very different Taylor. I want grown up Taylor to host dammit! Also she has a new album coming out so you know, shit to promote and what not.

James Marsden- Honestly either he or Patrick Dempsey could be on here cause both have a movie coming out in Disney plus this year. James Marsden though seems more able to access off the wall wacky between the two of them though.

Stephanie Beatriz- is there anyone less like the character that made them famous than this lady? Which speaks to how kickass of an actor she is. She definitely seems like someone who wouldn’t hide in the back with one line a sketch, she would be front and center and I want to see her take over.

Christopher Meloni- yet another in the how has this not happened yet? I don’t know but here’s why it should happen now- he’s got a current show so shit to promote, anyone who has seen wet hot American summer/this man’s social media knows he is fucking hilarious and doesn’t show that as much as he should, and they could do the soul cycle sketch again (because have you seen this man’s arms- like HOLY HELL. SIR HAS ANYONE TOLD YOU THAT IN FACT YOU ARE SIXTY ONE YEARS OLD! LIKE GOD DAMN!!!!)

Ariana DeBose- did she literally host not even a year ago? Yes, yes she did. Is this one super likely? No, no it is not. Is it just because her and Kate McKinnon and are fucking magic together and Kate has left the show and I’m in denial over this? Was I watching the Sappho sketch while typing this? Why do you ask?

Zachary Levi- should I stop saying why hasn’t this happened yet? Cause it’s like he starred in a show where he was the title character for five years- but that show was and still is underrated AF. And now he has a sequel coming out where he also plays the title character! And he is just the sweetest human alive if his social media is anything to go by and he’s lovely and needs to be in more stuff.

Vanessa Bayer- how long has she been off the show? Would this be found easily if I looked it up? You know probably. Still- she was always great on SNL and she has that all important shit to promote and she also should appear in more stuff, and because she is as her Miley impersonation would say, she is pretty cool!

Terry Crews- for real though why no asking people on Brooklyn nine nine to host? They would be so good at it! Terry would kill a hosting gig and have more energy than anyone in the building and they can do the soul cycle sketch again!

Sydney Sweeney- I remember seeing her on Ellen and Ellen was going on and on about how Sydney plays such different characters and she answered “yeah.. I’m an actor”. Which I mean it seems like a silly thing to point out but a lot of people just play the same type of character over and over and Sydney is so good in every role she’s played I would love to see her do comedy.

That is who I came up with now- I’ll check in a year to see if any of these came true.

[daddyavesxx]

Today, I saw my soulmate for the first time in concert for his Tickets To My Downfall tour . Almost met up with Rook but that got messed up for me ...

Then two shows this summer made it 3 and I got eye fucked by Baze .

Life is great 😂

[godzillareturn2014]

The Batman Review

So better late than ever. I saw The Batman starring Robert Pattison in IMAX last March and it was surprisingly amazing. Originally a stand alone Batman movie was going to be part of the DC Extended Universe and have Ben Affleck star in the film. However due to DC Extended Universe failing to have the same success as the Marvel Cinematic Universe, the new Batman is rework as a reboot and having Matt Reeve who of course directed Dawn of the Planet of the Apes and War for the Planet of the Apes to direct a Batman movie. This is also the second DC film since Joker (2019) not to be part of the DC Extended Universe. The story of this film is about Batman in his second year of fighting crime. Batman has pursues the Riddler, an evil serial killer who is targeting the citizens of Gotham City. Batman would later uncover corruption that connects to his own family during the investigation. Because of this, Batman is forced to team up with new allies including the mysterious Catwoman to fight and catch the Riddler and bring the corrupt to justice. I find the story of this film to be excellent. Plus there are a lot of exciting moments, intense moments, and darker moments as well. The special effects in this film are wonderful, the costume designs are very creative, the designs of the weapons and the vehicles are also very well designed, the make-ups are very good, and the action scenes are so brutal, intense, and groundbreaking to watch especially the fight scenes and the chase scenes. Now for the actors in this film. Let’s start with Batman played by Robert Pattison. Wow. Robert Pattison did a super awesome job playing Batman/Bruce Wayne who of course is a  A reclusive billionaire who obsessively protects Gotham City  as a masked vigilante to cope with his traumatic past. His performance as Batman is so dark, so tough, and so vengeful that he is good at solving the case, using his gadgets, and fight his enemies. Much like Michael Keaton, we all thought Robert Pattison is not the right guy to play Batman. But we were wrong. He did great. In my opinion, Robert Pattison is my third favorite Batman after Christian Bale and Michael Keaton. Then there Catwoman played by Zoë Kravitz. Catwoman in this film is a nightclub waitress, drug dealer, and cat burglar who meets and help Batman solve the mystery and find someone. She is of course very attractive and is good at fighting. Zoë Kravitz is now my third favorite Catwoman after Anne Hathaway and Michelle Pfeiffer. She is definitely much better than Halle Berry in that god awful Catwoman movie back in 2004. Also appearing in this film are James Gordon played by Jeffery Wright, Alfred played by Andy Serkis, Carmine Falcone played by John Turturro who was from Do The Right Thing, The Big Lebowski, O Brother Where Are Thou, and the Micheal Bay’s Transformers franchise, and Gil Colson played by Peter Sarsgaard. James Gordan is one of Batman’s allies in the Gotham City Police Department who helps Batman solve the Riddler case. I think Jeffrey Wright did just as great as Gary Oldman who plays James Gordon in The Dark Knight trilogy. Alfred is Batman loyal butler and mentor. Andy Serkis is now my second favorite Alfred after Michael Caine. Although Andy Serkis is known for playing motion capture characters, he has become one of those actors who has been in both Marvel and DC. Carmine Falcone is a Gotham crime lord who is a very dangerous guy just like Noah Cross from Roman Polanski’s Chinatown. Gil Colson is Gotham's district attorney. This is the second time that  Peter Sarsgaard is in a DC movie since he did appear in Green Lantern. Now for the villains, the Riddler played by Paul Dano who was from Little Miss Sunshine, There Will Be Blood, Cowboys and Aliens, 12 Years of Slave, and Prisoners and Penguin played by Colin Farrell. I think Paul Dano did a very splendid job playing the Riddler that is one of Batman’s enemies who is so smart, dark, menacing, threatening, and down right evil and in this film is a serial killer who targets elite Gotham citizens and livestreams his crimes. Unlike Jim Carrey’s Riddler in Batman Forever who is just a funny villain, Riddler in this film is very serious and much like Heath Ledger’s Joker, this is the Riddler you do not want to mess with. Penguin is also one of Batman’s enemies and in this film, he is  Falcone's chief lieutenant who operates the nightclub called Iceberg Lounge. Colin Ferrell is so unrecognizable in this film because the make up. Penguin in this film is basically a mixture of Robert De Niro as Al Capone from The Untouchables and one of the mafias in The Sopranos. Although Colin Farrell did a good job, I still think the best Penguin for me is Danny DeVito from Batman Returns because he is scary looking. Matt Reeves did a super wonderful job directing this movie especially he made this film so realistic, dark, and brutally epic. The music composed by Michael Giacchino sounds very intense and it feels like a Batman movie. It is also awesome to hear that song Something in the Way by Nirvana in this film. So overall, this is a wonderful Batman movie. This in my opinion is my fourth favorite Batman movie after The Dark Knight trilogy. I am most definitely excited for the sequel and hopefully the next villain should be Mr. Freeze and it has to be done right. Anyway, if you’re a fan of Batman and DC, this is a must see. So I give this movie 5 out of 5 nuclear bombs.

[osric-giroux-ffxiv]

Dusk Vigil - Pt. 2

“Skywatcher said we’d have a few hours of clear weather ‘fore all this snow got here. That wasn’t a few hours.” 

“You worked with companies who did jobs within the Highlands before, Geoffrey. You know as well as the rest of us that the skywatchers provide us with an estimate of how much time we may have. They cannot give us a perfect prediction. The weather here is notoriously unpredictable.”

“I ain’t convinced you don’t got some fancy warmers up in that armor of yours, Silvaire…”

Osric glanced at the pair for barely a moment, their conversation barely noticeable to him as his focus turned once again to the weather outside their makeshift camp and watching for Colson, who had left several minutes before to scout ahead. 

The warming potions the group had brought with them were doing their jobs, and so their temporary camp wasn’t put together out of necessity to stay warm, but as they had continued to trek northward towards the Dusk Vigil something had seemed…off. Things were too still…too quiet. A temporary pause to assess the area seemed prudent. 

Osric’s eyes narrowed as he spotted movement and he reached for his lance, the two men behind him quieting down and reaching for their weapons - Silvaire a sword and shield and Geoffrey his rifle. 

“Easy - all three of you jumpy bastards. ‘S just me. Ain’t nothin’ else out here anyhow.” Colson held his hands up as he shook his head, dislodging no small amount of snow before walking into the small rundown hut, kicking the door closed behind him.

“Well?” 

“Nice to see you too, Silvaire. Yes, it’s bloody cold out there still, in case you’re wondering.”

“Colson.” Osric set his lance aside, glancing back out the window once again before adjusting his coat around his shoulders, listening attentively. “Your report, if you would.”

“Aye.” The shorter man adjusted his own coat, rubbing his arms. “There ain’t a damn thing out there. And when I say not a damn thing, I mean not a damn thing. Abnormally, nothing. Normally I’d expect to see some sign of…anything. That there’s been wildlife, or errant travelers…something. Ain’t a thing. Been snowin’ like hell I understand, but this ain’t right. Someone’s tryin’ real hard to cover things up and keep things clear. Too hard.” 

“You covered your tracks?”

“Course.” 

Osric nodded, finally turning away from the window. “Well, it’s fair to assume the fort won’t be as empty as we would have hoped. We approach with caution. In addition - you are not to use my title.”

 “My lord?” Silvaire blinked slowly. 

“We don’t know who or what is waiting for us, Silvaire. Our objective is to remove all of them, but if one should manage to make it out I don’t want them turning their ire back on my family - on my pregnant wife, her sister, or anyone else within the house. My first name, or you may use Slater if you need to utilize a last name. Nothing is connected to that anymore.” His gaze shifted between the three men, taking time to pause on each one. “Do I make myself clear?”

He waited for each to confirm before grabbing his lance and opening the door, eyes closing as he exhaled slowly, the cold air rushing in. “Well then, Colson…if you’d be so kind as to lead the way - it shouldn’t be much further from here.” 

“Aye. Let’s go see what goodies the fort is hiding, boys.” 

Their approach was cautious, and it was just as Colson had said - eerily quiet…until they were just close enough to see the fort itself.

“Isn’t there normally a Temple Knight stationed  there?”

Osric scowled, spotting no less than three lights moving along the upper ridges of the fort - torches. “Normally there would be, but that was when the fort was unoccupied. It’s a fair assumption that the previously stationed Temple Knight has either been captured or met an untimely end.” He quickly scanned the area, looking for any other lookouts. “Colson…I need you to move up and remove any guards near the door. Geoffrey - see the light moving furthest from us?” 

“Aye.”

“Wait until I’ve removed the other two, then remove it. You’re a good enough shot to do that, correct.”

“Can do.”

“Silvaire - stay with Geoffrey for now, and then once all the lights are out, meet up with Colsen. I’ll find the three of you and we’ll all move in together - quietly.”

“As you say, sir.” 

His only response was a quick nod, before quietly slipping off into the storm, leaving the three men to their assigned tasks. He’d purposely chosen not to wear his Dragoon armor - knowing the noise the plate would make and choosing instead something that would allow him to move without drawing quite as much attention to himself. 

Gaze locked on the movements of the lights above him, Osric waited for one to disappear out of sight before easily making the leap up, landing without a sound and immediately spotting the first of the patrols. Mindful of his steps, he moved up behind the other man, pulling a knife from his belt as reached up to cover the man’s mouth. He made quick work of slitting the lookout’s throat - stomping out the torch before laying down the limp body and turning to find the second look out. 

He didn’t have to search long - the man starting to round the corner as Osric moved to peek around. 

“What the -”

“Too loud.” He reached out, and in one fluid motion grabbed the second man by the collar, pulling him around the corner towards him, and as he had the first, covering his mouth with his hand as he pulled his knife up and slit his throat. Once again, the torch fell to the ground and he made sure it was put out - the corner of his mouth quirking up to a small satisfactory smirk at the quick gunshot that was fired off as soon as the light dissipated, and he dragged the body over next to the first, laying them next to each other before hopping down and heading towards the entrance.

It was a short trek - though he was mindful to cover his tracks - and standing, waiting for him were the three men, weapons drawn.

“Good of you to join us.”

“Had a few things to take care of. Now - mindful as we head in. I’d expect we’re going to find more friends.”

Colson grinned. “Oh, I hope so.”

The gathering hall - ceiling missing and all - was full of empty crates. 

Recently emptied crates. 

They weren’t decayed or frozen. They were new - the wood barely touched by the elements. 

“Spread out, look for any sign of a mark or a symbol - something that indicates where these are from.” And they found many. Each crate had a different mark, a different symbol, and then another symbol that was pressed on top of it.

“A smuggling ring?” Geoffrey glanced around, looking in one of the crates as if something was going to magically appear within it. “Where are all the goods then?”

“That’s what it looks like…I imagine they’re mostly keepin’ things inside…” 

“Which also means the  forces are going to be inside. Let’s keep sharp.” Osric’s grip on his lance tightened, Silvaire beside him tensing. 

“You think they’ve been running off the traders, sir?”

“I imagine we’ll find out shortly. If I remember the layout correctly, the barracks are next. Keep your wits about you…”

Silvaire pushed open the door and moved through first, shield up and at the ready. Satisfied that they were not going to simply be blasted out of the doorway, he waved the other three men through, and they cautiously moved down the hall, checking each of the individual living spaces. 

What one might have expected to be cold, icy…dormant, was warm, clean new bedsheets on new beds, recently replaced furniture, fires in each space - it was clear the fort was being utilized, but by how many - that question remained unanswered. 

“I ain’t seein’ no one…”

“Quiet - they’re here, it’s just a matter of where.”

They continued forward -  the next room would be the Lord Commander’s Seat, if Osric remembered the layout Gaspard had provided well enough, a thought that didn’t inspire confidence as the room was nothing but a wide open space…but if they were to clear the fort.

He inhaled, motioning for the three other men to stand to the side as he pushed open the large door, letting his eyes adjust to the dim room before they widened for a moment, seeing the light just in time to dive out of the way as a lance, not unlike the one he carried, was hurled through the doorway, embedding itself in one of of the wooden posts back behind the small group. 

“Well, boss…so much for the element of surprise…”

“Was wondering when them Temple Knights were gonna come poking around, and it seems we have our answer. So now I’ve got a question for you - whoever you happen to be. You all planning on dying today? Because you could just walk away.” 

“Geoffery.”

“Aye.”

“The big one in the middle…”

“Yeah?”

“Shoot him in the knee for me.”

The man stared at Osric for a long second before shrugging, taking a moment to line up the shot and firing as requested - the howl of pain from the room a fairly good indication that the shot had hit its mark. 

“We could just walk away, or we could simply remove the lot of you - which seems like a much more straightforward option, don’t you think?” 

Osric turned back to his men for a moment. “I’ll draw their attention to me - you three spread out, take out the ones you can. Be quick, efficient  - get the job done, we go home.” 

He could hear movement from the other room, and so with a quick nod he slipped through the doors and leapt up into the air, aiming his lance, and his dive towards the largest group of enemies in the middle of the group.

[moviesandmania]

ONE WAY (2022) Crime thriller with Colson Baker and Kevin Bacon - trailer

ONE WAY (2022) Crime thriller with Colson Baker and Kevin Bacon – trailer

One Way is a 2022 American crime thriller about a petty crook on a Greyhound bus who has stolen from a drug lord and has a gunshot wound. Directed by Andrew Baird (Zone 414; War Requiem and several music videos) from a screenplay written by Ben Conway (Nightride; Bugaloo). The movie stars Travis Fimmel, Kevin Bacon, Drea de Matteo, Colson Baker aka Machine Gun Kelly, Storm Reid, Rhys Coiro,…